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<v Speaker 1>And I say this very seriously that anybody that lives

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<v Speaker 1>in a domestic violence situation and an abusive situation of any kind,

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<v Speaker 1>you always have a plan. It may be fantasy, right,

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<v Speaker 1>There are some women that are like, if I could

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<v Speaker 1>just get a job and make six figures a year,

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<v Speaker 1>and they're you know, high school graduates and have never worked,

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<v Speaker 1>and you know, but everybody always has a plan. And

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<v Speaker 1>so I knew that the biggest, the biggest thing that

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<v Speaker 1>I needed to focus on was the safety of the

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<v Speaker 1>children and I and that until I could ensure that

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<v Speaker 1>to the best of my ability, we just needed to

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<v Speaker 1>stay in an environment for where we could work things through.

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<v Speaker 1>And so by the time the incident had happened, I

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<v Speaker 1>had been trying to figure out a way to keep

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<v Speaker 1>us safe for well over five years, so it was

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<v Speaker 1>probably more like seven or eight. And so at that

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<v Speaker 1>point it was like, Okay, well, what do we do next?

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<v Speaker 1>And so in my world, the first thing was I

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<v Speaker 1>need an expert.

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<v Speaker 2>This is Wake Up with Marcie, a space for honest

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<v Speaker 2>conversations about healing, recovery and women's wellness. I'm Marcy Hopkins.

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<v Speaker 2>Take a breath, You're safe here.

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<v Speaker 3>Let's begin.

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<v Speaker 2>What if everything you've been told about success is wrong?

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<v Speaker 2>What if the promotion, the title, the perfect career, the

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<v Speaker 2>life that looks so good on the outside still leaves

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<v Speaker 2>you feeling empty Because so many high achieving women spend

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<v Speaker 2>years building a successful life while quietly losing themselves in

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<v Speaker 2>the process. And sometimes it isn't until life falls apart

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<v Speaker 2>that we finally understand or discover who we really are.

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<v Speaker 2>Welcome all to Wake Up with Marci. Thank you so

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<v Speaker 2>much for being here, Thank you for listening or watching.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm Marci Hopkins, your host, author, TV host, motivational speaker,

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<v Speaker 2>and mental health advocate, and on Wake Up with Marcie,

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<v Speaker 2>we have honest conversations about healing, recovery, relationships, and what

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<v Speaker 2>it really takes to rebuild your life. If today's conversation

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<v Speaker 2>and resonates with you, please make sure to like, comment

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<v Speaker 2>and share this episode with someone who may need to

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<v Speaker 2>hear it, because these are the conversations that help people

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<v Speaker 2>realize that they're not alone creating that ripple effect. Today's

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<v Speaker 2>episode is for every woman who has spent her life achieving, producing,

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<v Speaker 2>and taking care of everyone else. Like, does that sound

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<v Speaker 2>familiar because I've been there? But then one day you

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<v Speaker 2>wake up and wonder what about me? You've lost yourself,

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<v Speaker 2>Because sometimes the greatest transformation doesn't happen with life goes

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<v Speaker 2>according to plan. It happens when everything you thought to

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<v Speaker 2>find you falls away. My guest today is Melissa Franks.

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<v Speaker 2>Melissa is a nationally recognized business strategist, fractional COO, speaker,

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<v Speaker 2>podcast host, and founder of on Call CEO. A former

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<v Speaker 2>Fortune five hundred executive and three time on con Top

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<v Speaker 2>one hundred COO winner, she has led billion dollar transformations

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<v Speaker 2>and helped countless businesses scale and thrive. But behind the

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<v Speaker 2>corporate success is a woman who also knows what it

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<v Speaker 2>means to rebuild after personal and professional setbacks and to

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<v Speaker 2>discover that true success isn't just about what you build,

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<v Speaker 2>but who you become. Now let's meet Melissa. Hello, Melissa,

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<v Speaker 2>welcome to Wake Up with Marcy.

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<v Speaker 1>Hello, it's great to be here.

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<v Speaker 2>Thank you so much for taking the time, and I'm

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<v Speaker 2>excited about this conversation and listen.

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<v Speaker 3>I mean, we show up so.

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<v Speaker 2>Much for others in our lives, and we're trying to

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<v Speaker 2>accomplish so many things, and I think a lot of

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<v Speaker 2>that has to do with our upbringing especially in our

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<v Speaker 2>age group, as women always being the caretaker, right, we

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<v Speaker 2>were raised to be that. But for you, I mean,

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<v Speaker 2>things looked amazing, Right. You had a career, you were

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<v Speaker 2>a leader, and you had an accomplishment that so many

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<v Speaker 2>were were and are chasing. But you say your greatest

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<v Speaker 2>growth came during a season of personal and professional upheaval.

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<v Speaker 2>Can you take us back and share with us what

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<v Speaker 2>happened during that time?

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<v Speaker 1>Absolutely? So, I had what looked like on the outside

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<v Speaker 1>a meteoric rise inside of a financial services company. So

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<v Speaker 1>I had gotten very comfortable being the only woman. I

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<v Speaker 1>was always the youngest, and I really internally became the

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<v Speaker 1>poster child for successful woman. Look, we have a woman

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<v Speaker 1>that's in the C suite and she's a mom, and

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<v Speaker 1>she's married, and she can try all over the place.

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<v Speaker 1>And that persona was highly cultivated and managed by the corporation.

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<v Speaker 1>And I left them in the fall of twenty twenty

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<v Speaker 1>two because a it was time for me personally to

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<v Speaker 1>move on. I hit a ceiling and was bored out

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<v Speaker 1>of my mind. And also it wasn't a business where

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<v Speaker 1>I could work in anymore. It had been really difficult,

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<v Speaker 1>kind of behind the scenes. I went to a startup

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<v Speaker 1>and that lasted nine months until it failed. And almost

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<v Speaker 1>at the exact same time that the startup began to fail,

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<v Speaker 1>what had been very quietly behind the scenes an abusive

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<v Speaker 1>marriage for well over a decade imploded and the father

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<v Speaker 1>of my children ended up arrested for domestic violence in

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<v Speaker 1>July of twenty twenty three. As I said, the startup

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<v Speaker 1>was failing, but I kind of wasn't paying attention because

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<v Speaker 1>I was trying to figure things out in the family

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<v Speaker 1>court system. And so in October of twenty twenty three,

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<v Speaker 1>startup failed. I didn't get the sufference package that I

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<v Speaker 1>had negotiated so smart I was in family court every week,

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<v Speaker 1>so four and five figures a month in legal fees,

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<v Speaker 1>and I had three children I was responsible for, so

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<v Speaker 1>you know, standing there after all of these accomplishments, I

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<v Speaker 1>was unemployed. I had no income. I couldn't go get

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<v Speaker 1>a corporate job because I couldn't travel around the world

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<v Speaker 1>the way that I used to. We were definitely having

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<v Speaker 1>some safety concerns and I had to stop and say,

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<v Speaker 1>so what next? What do I do? And in that moment,

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<v Speaker 1>it was really, well, what am I best at? And

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<v Speaker 1>how can I make a dollar doing it?

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah, and so what did that end up being for you?

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<v Speaker 1>So ironically or maybe the universe was had my back

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<v Speaker 1>and an interesting moment a few a few weeks before

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<v Speaker 1>the startup really hit the skids, and I was offered

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<v Speaker 1>the opportunity to work for free if I wanted to,

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<v Speaker 1>which was not happening. I'm still always floored when I

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<v Speaker 1>say it that that was actually be offered offered, and

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<v Speaker 1>like in a serious like you know's we're in it together,

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<v Speaker 1>and I'm like, I don't feel like we're in it together.

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<v Speaker 1>And two weeks before that, I had a friend call

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<v Speaker 1>who had just started a business and she in fact,

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<v Speaker 1>at the time was one of less than two hundred

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<v Speaker 1>female female female African American entrepreneurs that it raised a

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<v Speaker 1>million dollars and seen money, so she highly accomplished on

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<v Speaker 1>her own. And she called me and said, I'm in

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<v Speaker 1>over my head and I don't know what I'm doing,

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<v Speaker 1>and I think I need your help. And I'm like, okay,

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<v Speaker 1>well we can probably figure that out. And so literally

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<v Speaker 1>I got off of the Zoom call where I no

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<v Speaker 1>longer had a job, and I called her and I said, hey,

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<v Speaker 1>do you still need some help? I think there was

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<v Speaker 1>about thirty minutes in between point A and point B,

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<v Speaker 1>and she said, I do And I said, okay, well,

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<v Speaker 1>I'm going to come in and be your fractional chief

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<v Speaker 1>operating officer and let me you know, what's your budget,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, because at this point any dollar was a dollar.

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<v Speaker 1>And she became my very first client at a retainer

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<v Speaker 1>for nine thousand dollars a month.

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<v Speaker 3>And that's very good.

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<v Speaker 1>To get me just this, like, okay, like for now,

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<v Speaker 1>you know, for the next thirty days or whatever it was,

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<v Speaker 1>there's a path I can be productive, I can balance

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<v Speaker 1>all the things that I have. Some money's coming in

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<v Speaker 1>the door. Let me figure out what to do next.

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<v Speaker 1>And that was really just kind of the beginning of

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<v Speaker 1>the what's this new chapter look like? And how do

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<v Speaker 1>we define this differently and what do I do going forward?

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<v Speaker 2>Well, let's rewind a little bit, because I don't want

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<v Speaker 2>to just pass over the fact that you were in

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<v Speaker 2>an abusive marriage, because there are a lot of women

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<v Speaker 2>that are in difficult relationships and abuse can be many things, right,

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<v Speaker 2>but when generally when you're in a relationship like that,

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, that breaks you down, tears you down. Like, So,

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<v Speaker 2>how did you manage to get through that very difficult time.

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<v Speaker 2>I'm sure you're still healing through it. How did you

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<v Speaker 2>find the strength to get through it and be there

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<v Speaker 2>for your children?

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<v Speaker 1>It's a really interesting question. You know. Recently we were

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<v Speaker 1>just awarded a permanent restraining order. It took us one

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<v Speaker 1>thousand and forty one days to get it. And during

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<v Speaker 1>that process, just recently, my therapist said, you know, you

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<v Speaker 1>have all the markers of PTSD and if we did

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<v Speaker 1>a formal diagnosis, we could give you that. And it

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<v Speaker 1>was such an interesting thing for me to think about

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<v Speaker 1>because what that really meant was that there was just

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<v Speaker 1>a lot of mechanisms that I had employed in order

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<v Speaker 1>to live this dual life, which is exactly what it

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<v Speaker 1>was to the public. There was there was one version

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<v Speaker 1>of what was happening, and then as soon as we

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<v Speaker 1>got inside, it was a completely different ball of blacks.

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<v Speaker 1>And so by the time everything had fallen apart, the

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<v Speaker 1>reality was and I say this very seriously that anybody

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<v Speaker 1>that lives a domestic violence situation and an abusive situation of

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<v Speaker 1>any kind, you always have a plan. It may be fantasy, right,

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<v Speaker 1>There are some women that are like, if I could

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<v Speaker 1>just get a job and make six figures a year

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<v Speaker 1>and they're you know, high school graduates and have never worked,

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<v Speaker 1>and you know, but everybody always has a plan, and

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<v Speaker 1>so I knew that the biggest, the biggest thing that

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<v Speaker 1>I needed to focus on was the safety of the

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<v Speaker 1>children and I and that until I could ensure that

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<v Speaker 1>to the best of my ability, we just needed to

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<v Speaker 1>stay in an environment for where we could work things through.

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<v Speaker 1>And so by the time the incident had happened, I

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<v Speaker 1>had been trying to figure out a way to keep

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<v Speaker 1>us safe for well over five years, so it was

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<v Speaker 1>probably more like seven or eight. And so at that

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<v Speaker 1>point it was like, Okay, well, what do we do next?

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<v Speaker 1>And so in my world, the first thing was I

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<v Speaker 1>need an expert. I'm not a family court expert. I

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<v Speaker 1>don't know what I'm doing. And so I found like

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<v Speaker 1>the very best lawyer that I could have possibly found

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<v Speaker 1>who could guide me through the process. And then it

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<v Speaker 1>became a matter of what can I control and what

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<v Speaker 1>can I not And I'm a rule follower, tried and true,

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<v Speaker 1>and so a lot of this process became what are

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<v Speaker 1>the rules and how do I operate within that? And

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<v Speaker 1>what did the children need? And what I realized very

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<v Speaker 1>very quickly, is that life for them on the other

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<v Speaker 1>side of the one incident was freeing. You know, I

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<v Speaker 1>lived in a household where we walked on eggshells and

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<v Speaker 1>everybody was silent and always in their rooms because that

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<v Speaker 1>was the safest place to be if we could be

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<v Speaker 1>in our rooms, like nothing bad was going to happen.

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<v Speaker 1>And just recently I was talking to somebody and I'm like,

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<v Speaker 1>I need to outside and talk to you. My house

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<v Speaker 1>was so loud. They were like running around and they

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<v Speaker 1>were playing video games and they were arguing, and like

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<v Speaker 1>there was music somewhere, and you know, we got three

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<v Speaker 1>teenage boys, and that house was something we would have

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<v Speaker 1>never been able to have before. And so the focus

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<v Speaker 1>was really how to keep them as healthy and happy

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<v Speaker 1>and stable as possible. And I can carry whatever where

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<v Speaker 1>I need to carry in order to make that happen.

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<v Speaker 2>So for someone out there, were there any signs leading

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<v Speaker 2>up to things unraveling, because I'm sure he put on

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<v Speaker 2>a great facade in the beginning, So what did you

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<v Speaker 2>start seeing? It could be markers for somebody else, right,

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<v Speaker 2>red flags.

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<v Speaker 3>For someone else.

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<v Speaker 1>I think one of the one of the biggest challenges.

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<v Speaker 1>So there's a few things. The definition of domestic violence

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<v Speaker 1>is quite broad, and I think people don't actually realize that.

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<v Speaker 1>We all think you end up in the hospital, it's

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<v Speaker 1>a domestic violence situation. You know, you see a bruise,

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<v Speaker 1>you see it, you see those things. And what I

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<v Speaker 1>realized much much later than I probably should have, is

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<v Speaker 1>that it's multifaceted. And so you know, there's a term

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<v Speaker 1>called course of control that I encourage everybody to kind

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<v Speaker 1>of understand, which means financial control, isolation, manipulation, Uh, there

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<v Speaker 1>are layers of emotional abuse and you know, and other things.

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<v Speaker 1>So it's not just a physical situation. But most people

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<v Speaker 1>to end up in this in an abusive relationship. It

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<v Speaker 1>happens over time. And one of the things that I

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<v Speaker 1>really encourage people to think about is to step back

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<v Speaker 1>and say, does my life, my personal life look materially

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<v Speaker 1>different now than it used to. I became incredibly isolated.

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<v Speaker 1>That was for two reasons. One he made it very

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<v Speaker 1>difficult for people to stay in our lives, and two

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't want people to know what was happening. And

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<v Speaker 1>so the best way to protect the illusion was to

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<v Speaker 1>just stop engaging with people. And if I had stepped

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<v Speaker 1>back and really started to look at some of those

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<v Speaker 1>earlier markers before things got significantly worse, I would have

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<v Speaker 1>been able to say, Oh, there's something happening here. Why

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<v Speaker 1>am I hiding in plain sight? What's happening here? And

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<v Speaker 1>I think that that's it's the slow burn and the

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<v Speaker 1>loss of identity that's the hardest to identify. But being

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<v Speaker 1>able to step out of yourself and say what compromises

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<v Speaker 1>have I made to be in this relationship? And if

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<v Speaker 1>I was talking to my best friend, would I be

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<v Speaker 1>okay with her making those compromises?

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<v Speaker 3>So true? It's so true.

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<v Speaker 2>And it is a slow process, and it's you're broken

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<v Speaker 2>down slowly, and the changes it's not it's not like overnight.

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<v Speaker 2>And I never want to take away from physical but

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<v Speaker 2>mental abuse and control. I mean it literally breaks you

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<v Speaker 2>down to nothing, just as the physical abuse does, and

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<v Speaker 2>you completely lose yourself.

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<v Speaker 3>Yeah.

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<v Speaker 2>So I just want to say that I'm so enamored

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<v Speaker 2>by your strength to be able to move past and

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<v Speaker 2>get your children out of that situation and yourself and

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<v Speaker 2>yourself because I know so many or so fearful and

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<v Speaker 2>they stay in situations because they don't know how to

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<v Speaker 2>get out ye.

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<v Speaker 3>So for you, you got.

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<v Speaker 2>Out and you had this opportunity and again like you

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<v Speaker 2>were taken down and you had nothing right like, and

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<v Speaker 2>I can relate to that. I mean, it's kind of

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<v Speaker 2>like you're starting at that ground zero and having to rebuild.

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<v Speaker 3>And there's a lot of power and strength that comes

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<v Speaker 3>with that.

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<v Speaker 2>Truly, truly it does. So let's let's talk about where

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<v Speaker 2>did that take you once you were given that incredible opportunity.

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<v Speaker 2>I mean, God is so good, right these things come

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<v Speaker 2>in And would you say that at that time that

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<v Speaker 2>you were putting stuff out that you were like looking

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<v Speaker 2>for this opportunity or trying to be guided in some

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<v Speaker 2>way to what's next.

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, if you could pound the virtual pavement, I

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<v Speaker 1>was pounding it. I've been a high achiever all of

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<v Speaker 1>my life, right, like we do we do not lose,

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<v Speaker 1>We find a way to win. You know, That's that's

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<v Speaker 1>how I am wired. And I also because I had

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<v Speaker 1>I had run very large businesses, I knew practically speaking,

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<v Speaker 1>this one opportunity is short lived and not sustainable and

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<v Speaker 1>not enough. And so if I'm going to do this,

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<v Speaker 1>even if it's going to be short term, I need

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<v Speaker 1>to like be firing on all cylinders. And so the

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<v Speaker 1>very first thing that I did, which was probably one

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<v Speaker 1>of the harder things for me to do, is I

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<v Speaker 1>had just completely remove all ego. I had to like

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<v Speaker 1>get rid of any sort of humility I had, and

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<v Speaker 1>just anybody I could talk to if this is what

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<v Speaker 1>I'm doing, this is do you know anybody that needs help?

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<v Speaker 1>And I really put myself as far out there as

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<v Speaker 1>I could and was willing to do anything. You know,

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<v Speaker 1>it it was not it was not a steady climb up.

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<v Speaker 1>So this is just not a not a story of

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<v Speaker 1>it was so easy. And what we did? You know,

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<v Speaker 1>she that I worked with her for about four months

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<v Speaker 1>and I knew it was coming to an end, and

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't have anything in the hopper I had. I'd

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<v Speaker 1>engaged my whole network, and you know, I was doing

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<v Speaker 1>all the things and just literally nothing was happening.

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<v Speaker 3>It was just crickets.

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<v Speaker 1>And so I was at the point where I was

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<v Speaker 1>on government assistance, and I'm like, do I go work

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<v Speaker 1>at Starbucks? Like you know, they have good health benefits,

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<v Speaker 1>Like you know, what do we do here? Do one

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<v Speaker 1>hundred percent? And I happened to be in you know,

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<v Speaker 1>the right room at the right time with the right people,

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<v Speaker 1>and the next client showed up in that regard, and

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<v Speaker 1>what I what I realized very quickly is it wasn't

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<v Speaker 1>the world that I had built previously that was going

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<v Speaker 1>to help me get through this hump. It was the

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<v Speaker 1>risks and vulnerability that I was going to bring with

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<v Speaker 1>me into the new chapter that were going to help

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<v Speaker 1>me get to the people that were going to give

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<v Speaker 1>me either the skills or the connections or the network

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<v Speaker 1>or the whatever to get to where I needed to go.

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<v Speaker 1>And so it was really a process of saying that

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<v Speaker 1>group of women that I was with in that early

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<v Speaker 1>March room, they kept referring to me as kind of

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<v Speaker 1>the phoenix rising from the ashes, and that was really

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<v Speaker 1>imagery that I stayed with me as we burned it

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<v Speaker 1>all to the ground October twenty twenty three. Everything got

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<v Speaker 1>burned to the ground, and so this is now an

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<v Speaker 1>opportunity for me to figure out what that phoenix is

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<v Speaker 1>going to look like, how far that phoenix is going

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<v Speaker 1>to fly.

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<v Speaker 2>And I love that you brought up vulnerability because that

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<v Speaker 2>is a huge part of my own story and it's

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<v Speaker 2>something that I think it's so important that we do

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<v Speaker 2>talk about, especially as strong women that you see on

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<v Speaker 2>the outside is so successful, and it is when we

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<v Speaker 2>got the most vulnerable that we were the strongest. So

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<v Speaker 2>for you, what is vulnerability really look like? And how

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<v Speaker 2>can you encourage somebody else to get vulnerable with themselves.

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<v Speaker 1>So for me, as somebody that had always had all

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<v Speaker 1>the answers, knew how to do the thing, could figure

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00:19:13.000 --> 00:19:14.680
<v Speaker 1>out out if she needed to, Like I, you know,

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<v Speaker 1>in the corporate world, I was where everybody came when

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<v Speaker 1>things were blowing up, you know, like I was. At

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<v Speaker 1>one point, I was referred to as the Cia of

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<v Speaker 1>the corporation. At another point, I was referred to as

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<v Speaker 1>the fixer.

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<v Speaker 2>You know.

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<v Speaker 1>People used to call me the Olivia Pope of financial services.

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<v Speaker 1>And so for me, vulnerability was being very clear, transparent,

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<v Speaker 1>candid with anybody, like I don't know what I'm doing.

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<v Speaker 3>That's big.

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<v Speaker 1>I really don't know what I am doing. I know

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<v Speaker 1>how to start businesses with like strong seed money and

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<v Speaker 1>corporate backers and private equity and these sorts of things,

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<v Speaker 1>but like this whole I'm going to start this thing

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<v Speaker 1>and I'm going to find clients and I'm going to

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<v Speaker 1>you know, make a big impact, and you know, I

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<v Speaker 1>don't know what I'm doing. I don't know how to

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<v Speaker 1>use social media to grow business. I don't know what

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<v Speaker 1>paid advertising means. Like I know what a billboard is,

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00:20:02.519 --> 00:20:04.759
<v Speaker 1>but I don't even know the language you're talking about.

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<v Speaker 1>And so for me, it was at you know, forty

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<v Speaker 1>five and highly accomplished on paper, getting very public and

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<v Speaker 1>loud about the fact of like, I need help. Who

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<v Speaker 1>knows how to do this?

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<v Speaker 3>Love?

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<v Speaker 1>Who can I meet?

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<v Speaker 2>Yeah?

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<v Speaker 1>Who introduce me to? Who can I buy a program from?

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<v Speaker 1>Who do I need to learn from?

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<v Speaker 3>Like?

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<v Speaker 1>I don't know what I'm doing, But what I do

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<v Speaker 1>know is that I have something to offer to the world.

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<v Speaker 1>And if I can figure out what skills I need

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<v Speaker 1>to be able to pair with my expertise, then there's

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<v Speaker 1>a path forward.

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<v Speaker 3>Ladies.

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<v Speaker 2>I want you to listen to that, because that is

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<v Speaker 2>my story too, And I thought that I could do

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<v Speaker 2>it on my own, and I tried to do it

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<v Speaker 2>on my own. But it's so important to recognize the

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<v Speaker 2>things that you don't know how to do, and also

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<v Speaker 2>to invest in yourself. It is so hard for us

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<v Speaker 2>to think that we.

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<v Speaker 3>Can spend money on ourselves and that's.

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<v Speaker 2>Okay, But yet it's okay to spend money on another

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<v Speaker 2>bag or another.

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<v Speaker 3>Pair of shoes, and yeah, that makes you.

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<v Speaker 2>Feel good, but really there's no growth from that, so

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<v Speaker 2>it's not long term.

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00:21:17.519 --> 00:21:18.960
<v Speaker 3>It's an initial fix.

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<v Speaker 2>So just think about it that way and just think

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<v Speaker 2>about the next time you want to go shopping, maybe

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00:21:26.079 --> 00:21:28.640
<v Speaker 2>put that money to the side and think about how

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00:21:28.680 --> 00:21:31.920
<v Speaker 2>can I grow and how can that's going to be

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<v Speaker 2>the reward for you and at our age now and

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00:21:36.480 --> 00:21:40.519
<v Speaker 2>if we are reinventing ourselves, it's so important because.

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<v Speaker 3>There's so much for us.

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<v Speaker 2>There's so much change, and there's so much for us

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00:21:43.680 --> 00:21:47.359
<v Speaker 2>to learn, and it's okay, and I love what you say.

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00:21:47.440 --> 00:21:50.759
<v Speaker 2>Like the other thing that I believe and something I

401
00:21:50.920 --> 00:21:54.160
<v Speaker 2>learned way back when, is that you don't want to

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00:21:54.200 --> 00:21:56.119
<v Speaker 2>be just the cog and the will right.

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00:21:56.279 --> 00:21:59.519
<v Speaker 3>You want to know how the whole wheel works and

404
00:21:59.640 --> 00:22:00.720
<v Speaker 3>have insight.

405
00:22:01.039 --> 00:22:04.240
<v Speaker 2>You don't have to do everything, but just have insight

406
00:22:04.279 --> 00:22:08.640
<v Speaker 2>and understanding how things work together so you can grow.

407
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<v Speaker 2>So tell us about how now you are helping others

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00:22:13.000 --> 00:22:13.599
<v Speaker 2>to do that.

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<v Speaker 1>So you know, it's interesting because I found that I

410
00:22:18.160 --> 00:22:20.200
<v Speaker 1>was in a room with people a decade plus younger

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00:22:20.200 --> 00:22:22.200
<v Speaker 1>than I was, because they have the skills and the

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00:22:22.279 --> 00:22:27.599
<v Speaker 1>knowledge and the expertise. And what I also found was

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<v Speaker 1>as much as they were giving me, I had as

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00:22:29.799 --> 00:22:32.119
<v Speaker 1>much to give back to them. Yes, because I had

415
00:22:32.119 --> 00:22:34.119
<v Speaker 1>been there, I had done it, I had seen it all,

416
00:22:34.400 --> 00:22:37.319
<v Speaker 1>you know, heard the screenplay, watched the movie, et cetera.

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00:22:37.640 --> 00:22:41.559
<v Speaker 1>And it really became a matter of, initially, how can

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<v Speaker 1>I monetize my expertise in a way that helps others

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<v Speaker 1>like them. So helps the female small business owner who

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<v Speaker 1>had the ability to solve a problem, how to widget,

421
00:22:54.079 --> 00:22:56.200
<v Speaker 1>you know, how to build a better mouse trap, like,

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00:22:56.200 --> 00:22:58.240
<v Speaker 1>how can I get into those spaces and really just

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<v Speaker 1>give them what I understand is pragmatic business expertise as

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<v Speaker 1>a chief operating officer and really help them. And so

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<v Speaker 1>that's where I started, was they were able to identify

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00:23:08.960 --> 00:23:10.519
<v Speaker 1>and me the things that I knew how to do

427
00:23:10.559 --> 00:23:12.839
<v Speaker 1>that they didn't. And they did that by literally every

428
00:23:12.880 --> 00:23:14.559
<v Speaker 1>time we would be in a forum and somebody who

429
00:23:14.559 --> 00:23:15.920
<v Speaker 1>asked me a question, all of a sudden, I see

430
00:23:15.920 --> 00:23:17.519
<v Speaker 1>three phones come out and they would start, you know,

431
00:23:17.559 --> 00:23:19.799
<v Speaker 1>recording me. So these women are wandering around by with

432
00:23:19.839 --> 00:23:21.880
<v Speaker 1>hours of voice notes of me at this point to

433
00:23:22.319 --> 00:23:24.759
<v Speaker 1>listen to. I was writing business plans on the back

434
00:23:24.799 --> 00:23:26.599
<v Speaker 1>of a napkin while we were at a conference. And

435
00:23:28.039 --> 00:23:30.319
<v Speaker 1>so I learned through one of those women how to

436
00:23:30.359 --> 00:23:35.319
<v Speaker 1>run paid advertising, and I said, I'm gonna boil what

437
00:23:35.359 --> 00:23:39.200
<v Speaker 1>a fractional COO is down to just the basics, you know.

438
00:23:39.359 --> 00:23:41.960
<v Speaker 1>And I got very specific around the problems that we

439
00:23:42.000 --> 00:23:45.000
<v Speaker 1>could solve, I could solve in a business, and I

440
00:23:45.039 --> 00:23:49.319
<v Speaker 1>went to market with that. And what I found was

441
00:23:49.519 --> 00:23:53.759
<v Speaker 1>relatively quickly two things. One, there was a lot of demand,

442
00:23:54.200 --> 00:23:57.119
<v Speaker 1>so that was great. I only ever wanted to make

443
00:23:57.240 --> 00:23:59.440
<v Speaker 1>enough money so that we could live. That was the goal.

444
00:23:59.559 --> 00:24:01.759
<v Speaker 1>Be a soul, can newer, you know, single shingle and

445
00:24:01.839 --> 00:24:06.039
<v Speaker 1>et cetera. And about six months in two things happen simultaneously.

446
00:24:06.519 --> 00:24:09.000
<v Speaker 1>Demand exceeded my ability to fulfill.

447
00:24:09.519 --> 00:24:09.960
<v Speaker 3>Wow.

448
00:24:10.839 --> 00:24:14.759
<v Speaker 1>And I had all of these phenomenal women sending me

449
00:24:14.839 --> 00:24:17.400
<v Speaker 1>emails saying, I want to be an on call COEO.

450
00:24:17.559 --> 00:24:19.799
<v Speaker 1>That's the name of my company. And I'm like, that's

451
00:24:19.880 --> 00:24:22.000
<v Speaker 1>not a thing, it doesn't exist.

452
00:24:22.319 --> 00:24:22.680
<v Speaker 3>It's me.

453
00:24:23.440 --> 00:24:28.440
<v Speaker 1>There is no There is no that. And when I

454
00:24:28.480 --> 00:24:31.240
<v Speaker 1>got to the place where I'd over committed myself from

455
00:24:31.960 --> 00:24:34.160
<v Speaker 1>a demand perspective, and I'm like, oh, I really can't

456
00:24:34.480 --> 00:24:37.200
<v Speaker 1>do work this much. That's actually not possible, with not

457
00:24:37.319 --> 00:24:40.519
<v Speaker 1>possible and all the things I started adding to the team,

458
00:24:40.640 --> 00:24:42.400
<v Speaker 1>and I'm like, let's just experiment. This could be an

459
00:24:42.400 --> 00:24:44.079
<v Speaker 1>absolute mess and then we'll pull it back. And I

460
00:24:44.119 --> 00:24:46.039
<v Speaker 1>know how much I can can I can hold myself.

461
00:24:46.079 --> 00:24:51.680
<v Speaker 1>And so in the spring of twenty twenty five, that's

462
00:24:51.759 --> 00:24:53.559
<v Speaker 1>what I did. I started adding people to the team.

463
00:24:53.559 --> 00:24:54.400
<v Speaker 1>And now we're a team of.

464
00:24:54.400 --> 00:25:01.680
<v Speaker 2>Seventeen amazing, amazing, and it is so important for all

465
00:25:01.759 --> 00:25:05.359
<v Speaker 2>of us to to recognize we don't have to do

466
00:25:05.400 --> 00:25:08.319
<v Speaker 2>it all of our on our own, and there is

467
00:25:08.480 --> 00:25:11.759
<v Speaker 2>help out there, and it's it's not out of reach,

468
00:25:12.920 --> 00:25:13.519
<v Speaker 2>the help that.

469
00:25:13.799 --> 00:25:15.000
<v Speaker 3>You know, creating a team.

470
00:25:15.720 --> 00:25:19.319
<v Speaker 2>And I was just watching a video that a little

471
00:25:19.319 --> 00:25:22.000
<v Speaker 2>short that you put on LinkedIn, and it actually really

472
00:25:22.039 --> 00:25:27.079
<v Speaker 2>resonated with me about doing the emails, all the little

473
00:25:27.119 --> 00:25:31.960
<v Speaker 2>tasks that I'm constantly doing. Yeah, that doesn't allow me

474
00:25:32.240 --> 00:25:36.359
<v Speaker 2>to do the bigger projects and and put my efforts

475
00:25:36.400 --> 00:25:40.240
<v Speaker 2>into other places. And those are areas that I could

476
00:25:41.039 --> 00:25:43.960
<v Speaker 2>I could use more help in, and I do have

477
00:25:44.039 --> 00:25:45.759
<v Speaker 2>people that could do it, you know.

478
00:25:46.000 --> 00:25:52.079
<v Speaker 1>It's just yeah, yeah, I think that often those of

479
00:25:52.160 --> 00:25:54.519
<v Speaker 1>us that are in the successful in the business space,

480
00:25:54.839 --> 00:25:57.400
<v Speaker 1>I even think that that homemakers that you know have

481
00:25:57.440 --> 00:26:01.200
<v Speaker 1>a well oiled, you know, running machine. Also because I

482
00:26:01.200 --> 00:26:02.839
<v Speaker 1>could never do that. So I'm always in awe of

483
00:26:02.880 --> 00:26:07.119
<v Speaker 1>these women that can do those things. We are powered

484
00:26:07.160 --> 00:26:10.559
<v Speaker 1>by the ability to see that we are getting stuff

485
00:26:10.599 --> 00:26:15.079
<v Speaker 1>done by productivity. And sometimes it is so much easier

486
00:26:15.079 --> 00:26:17.119
<v Speaker 1>to count how many emails we sent, how many things

487
00:26:17.119 --> 00:26:19.480
<v Speaker 1>we put on our calendar, how many tasks we got

488
00:26:19.480 --> 00:26:22.400
<v Speaker 1>off the task list, then to sit down and say, okay,

489
00:26:22.440 --> 00:26:24.839
<v Speaker 1>so the hard thing is that I really need to

490
00:26:24.880 --> 00:26:27.680
<v Speaker 1>look at the entire model itself and figure out where

491
00:26:27.680 --> 00:26:29.920
<v Speaker 1>it's broken and where I can start. You know what

492
00:26:29.960 --> 00:26:31.759
<v Speaker 1>my growth lovers are, and like I need to sit

493
00:26:31.799 --> 00:26:34.400
<v Speaker 1>and think for three hours and like figure this out.

494
00:26:34.759 --> 00:26:37.400
<v Speaker 1>And so we will distract ourselves by the easy things

495
00:26:37.759 --> 00:26:41.880
<v Speaker 1>because we're feeling productive. But where the true growth, whether

496
00:26:42.000 --> 00:26:44.839
<v Speaker 1>it's you, of a human or of a business comes

497
00:26:44.920 --> 00:26:48.799
<v Speaker 1>is from that like actual dedicated big thinking time. And so,

498
00:26:49.279 --> 00:26:52.200
<v Speaker 1>you know, my business part of what we do is

499
00:26:52.240 --> 00:26:55.119
<v Speaker 1>we either help you do that big thinking because we

500
00:26:55.200 --> 00:26:57.319
<v Speaker 1>know how to do it, and we know what blind

501
00:26:57.319 --> 00:26:59.440
<v Speaker 1>spots you're going to have and what lies you're going

502
00:26:59.480 --> 00:27:02.160
<v Speaker 1>to tell your self and how you're going to get

503
00:27:02.200 --> 00:27:05.839
<v Speaker 1>yourself into situations that are unfortunately not the right ones.

504
00:27:06.480 --> 00:27:08.680
<v Speaker 1>But we can also bring in people to get those

505
00:27:08.720 --> 00:27:12.079
<v Speaker 1>tasks done, or help find people to get the tasks done,

506
00:27:12.119 --> 00:27:14.720
<v Speaker 1>so that you eliminate the distraction, because if you give

507
00:27:14.720 --> 00:27:16.960
<v Speaker 1>that work to somebody else permanently, you don't get to

508
00:27:16.960 --> 00:27:19.799
<v Speaker 1>pick it up anymore and start doing it yourself.

509
00:27:19.839 --> 00:27:23.599
<v Speaker 2>Again, I think there's a lot of fear of failure,

510
00:27:23.680 --> 00:27:25.880
<v Speaker 2>right to put yourself out there to.

511
00:27:25.880 --> 00:27:26.920
<v Speaker 3>Do the big thing.

512
00:27:27.359 --> 00:27:31.839
<v Speaker 2>And then I also think that there's a lot of control.

513
00:27:32.000 --> 00:27:34.920
<v Speaker 2>There's a fear of letting go of control that I

514
00:27:35.039 --> 00:27:37.119
<v Speaker 2>know what I need, I know what you know the

515
00:27:37.160 --> 00:27:40.319
<v Speaker 2>answers to these things, and nobody else can do it.

516
00:27:40.880 --> 00:27:44.839
<v Speaker 2>And I am definitely guilty of that. So how can

517
00:27:44.880 --> 00:27:45.839
<v Speaker 2>we overcome that?

518
00:27:46.880 --> 00:27:51.079
<v Speaker 1>I So it's interesting because I said to somebody the

519
00:27:51.119 --> 00:27:53.920
<v Speaker 1>other day that the one thing that sends me into

520
00:27:53.960 --> 00:27:57.640
<v Speaker 1>a panic is a bunch of white space on my calendar.

521
00:27:59.000 --> 00:28:02.720
<v Speaker 1>Because as soon as my calendar looks empty, I question

522
00:28:03.440 --> 00:28:05.880
<v Speaker 1>my existence and being. And I can run and look

523
00:28:05.880 --> 00:28:08.279
<v Speaker 1>at the bank account. I can look at our you know,

524
00:28:08.279 --> 00:28:10.279
<v Speaker 1>accounts receivable. I can look at how many contracts are

525
00:28:10.279 --> 00:28:12.920
<v Speaker 1>and playing we are fine. There's plenty of money there

526
00:28:12.920 --> 00:28:14.599
<v Speaker 1>are sales calls that are coming in and on the

527
00:28:14.599 --> 00:28:19.000
<v Speaker 1>calendar and all the things. But as somebody that is

528
00:28:19.160 --> 00:28:23.240
<v Speaker 1>used to making the business move forward, I'm really having

529
00:28:23.240 --> 00:28:27.440
<v Speaker 1>to rewire my brain to say, that's your time.

530
00:28:27.559 --> 00:28:28.559
<v Speaker 3>To grow the thing.

531
00:28:29.200 --> 00:28:32.240
<v Speaker 1>That's your time to go out into the world and

532
00:28:32.319 --> 00:28:36.759
<v Speaker 1>attend a networking event or a conference or you know,

533
00:28:36.960 --> 00:28:40.119
<v Speaker 1>write content or whatever it might be. Like I've really

534
00:28:40.240 --> 00:28:43.279
<v Speaker 1>and it's something I'm actively coaching myself on, yeh, but like,

535
00:28:43.359 --> 00:28:46.680
<v Speaker 1>this is the opportunity that you were looking for so

536
00:28:46.920 --> 00:28:49.319
<v Speaker 1>that you can grow to the next level. And so

537
00:28:49.440 --> 00:28:53.200
<v Speaker 1>I think often we create these false markers for ourselves

538
00:28:53.279 --> 00:28:56.640
<v Speaker 1>of what productivity and success looks like. If I am overscheduled,

539
00:28:56.720 --> 00:28:59.400
<v Speaker 1>if I am incredibly busy, if I'm not sleeping enough,

540
00:28:59.640 --> 00:29:01.480
<v Speaker 1>if my phone is bringing off the hook, if I

541
00:29:01.480 --> 00:29:03.559
<v Speaker 1>am forgetting to do things because my list is so

542
00:29:03.640 --> 00:29:06.440
<v Speaker 1>long I can't hold it in my brain anymore, I'm winning.

543
00:29:07.160 --> 00:29:11.359
<v Speaker 1>And the reality is that that's the opposite of winning. Yeah,

544
00:29:11.839 --> 00:29:13.799
<v Speaker 1>you know. And so I think we really have to

545
00:29:14.440 --> 00:29:16.519
<v Speaker 1>either find an external coach or find a way to

546
00:29:16.519 --> 00:29:19.880
<v Speaker 1>do it to yourself, but really start to rewire those

547
00:29:19.920 --> 00:29:22.319
<v Speaker 1>lies that we were telling ourselves about what success looks like.

548
00:29:23.079 --> 00:29:27.200
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, And that's one of the things I've done, rewire

549
00:29:27.319 --> 00:29:33.799
<v Speaker 2>my brain from my healing journey. And it's those little steps.

550
00:29:33.960 --> 00:29:36.759
<v Speaker 2>You know, it's not something that's going to happen overnight.

551
00:29:36.920 --> 00:29:41.200
<v Speaker 2>I mean, we have these habits that are ingrained the

552
00:29:41.279 --> 00:29:45.720
<v Speaker 2>muscle memory, and so we've got to change those very slowly.

553
00:29:46.400 --> 00:29:49.759
<v Speaker 2>So give yourself grace. It doesn't happen overnight, and that's okay.

554
00:29:51.559 --> 00:29:54.640
<v Speaker 2>So let's talk about somebody that's out there, woman that

555
00:29:54.759 --> 00:29:58.759
<v Speaker 2>she is struggling or something she doesn't know what's next.

556
00:29:59.000 --> 00:30:05.960
<v Speaker 2>And self discovery, how we can connect with ourselves and

557
00:30:06.160 --> 00:30:10.880
<v Speaker 2>really understand what is that next chapter for ourselves and

558
00:30:11.119 --> 00:30:15.359
<v Speaker 2>maybe this next chapter, like maybe it's our happiest chapter,

559
00:30:15.440 --> 00:30:17.359
<v Speaker 2>but we're too afraid to like jump in.

560
00:30:18.799 --> 00:30:23.640
<v Speaker 1>So one of the things that I did years before

561
00:30:23.839 --> 00:30:26.559
<v Speaker 1>my life turned upside down and I had to reinvent

562
00:30:26.640 --> 00:30:32.119
<v Speaker 1>myselves is I started these small journaling practices. And I

563
00:30:32.200 --> 00:30:34.519
<v Speaker 1>kept hearing everybody, you know, say you should journal, you

564
00:30:34.559 --> 00:30:37.000
<v Speaker 1>should journal, and I'm like, uh, you know, that's it's

565
00:30:37.039 --> 00:30:38.880
<v Speaker 1>in my household. It was a little risky writing stuff

566
00:30:38.880 --> 00:30:40.839
<v Speaker 1>down because you know, like somebody could find it and

567
00:30:40.839 --> 00:30:43.480
<v Speaker 1>then it would be a problem. And but I started

568
00:30:43.480 --> 00:30:48.160
<v Speaker 1>with a gratitude journal initially, and then I read a

569
00:30:48.279 --> 00:30:52.079
<v Speaker 1>variety of books that had different guidance around journaling practices,

570
00:30:52.119 --> 00:30:54.240
<v Speaker 1>and so I kind of cherry picked a bunch of

571
00:30:54.240 --> 00:30:57.319
<v Speaker 1>things and what I started to do was on a

572
00:30:57.400 --> 00:31:00.759
<v Speaker 1>daily basis, you know, write one off that I've been

573
00:31:00.759 --> 00:31:03.960
<v Speaker 1>writing for now the last four years around what my

574
00:31:04.000 --> 00:31:06.519
<v Speaker 1>life looks like. So it has nothing to do with

575
00:31:06.640 --> 00:31:09.839
<v Speaker 1>like a financial goal or the house someone to live

576
00:31:09.839 --> 00:31:11.160
<v Speaker 1>in or any of that. It's just really what is

577
00:31:11.200 --> 00:31:12.839
<v Speaker 1>my life look like at the person I am and

578
00:31:12.880 --> 00:31:16.799
<v Speaker 1>who I am, And then I spend time thinking about

579
00:31:17.160 --> 00:31:20.519
<v Speaker 1>where I want to go right And as I go

580
00:31:20.559 --> 00:31:24.640
<v Speaker 1>through that journaling practice, it's really helped me clear my brain.

581
00:31:24.799 --> 00:31:27.200
<v Speaker 1>So some days I just do stream of consciousness, what's

582
00:31:27.200 --> 00:31:29.039
<v Speaker 1>everything that's driving me crazy and get it out on

583
00:31:29.079 --> 00:31:32.480
<v Speaker 1>paper so that it's out of here and on the page.

584
00:31:32.720 --> 00:31:36.160
<v Speaker 1>But I found that just those quiet moments every day

585
00:31:36.319 --> 00:31:39.880
<v Speaker 1>where I could refocus around what's most important to me,

586
00:31:41.759 --> 00:31:43.599
<v Speaker 1>What do I want my legacy to be, what I

587
00:31:43.640 --> 00:31:45.119
<v Speaker 1>want my life to be at the end of it.

588
00:31:45.160 --> 00:31:47.400
<v Speaker 1>And this is not an activity where you have all

589
00:31:47.400 --> 00:31:50.200
<v Speaker 1>of the answers. This is an activity where you get

590
00:31:50.200 --> 00:31:54.200
<v Speaker 1>to just dream a little bit. And I found that

591
00:31:54.279 --> 00:31:58.559
<v Speaker 1>as soon as I got clarity around the dream and

592
00:31:58.599 --> 00:32:01.960
<v Speaker 1>what those components saw, it helped me as I went

593
00:32:02.039 --> 00:32:04.240
<v Speaker 1>through throughout the rest of my day to just start

594
00:32:04.240 --> 00:32:09.119
<v Speaker 1>making decisions. And it became really easy to see, that's

595
00:32:09.160 --> 00:32:12.920
<v Speaker 1>not a line to the life that I want, you know,

596
00:32:13.119 --> 00:32:16.319
<v Speaker 1>like that that doesn't feel centered and correct anymore. It

597
00:32:16.400 --> 00:32:18.799
<v Speaker 1>was actually the it was. It started providing me the

598
00:32:18.839 --> 00:32:22.279
<v Speaker 1>ability to make some decisions about where my energy went

599
00:32:22.319 --> 00:32:24.400
<v Speaker 1>and my time went, and my money and all of

600
00:32:24.400 --> 00:32:27.759
<v Speaker 1>those things. And so my biggest recommendation to anybody is

601
00:32:27.799 --> 00:32:31.440
<v Speaker 1>to just get really really clear on what you're working towards,

602
00:32:31.759 --> 00:32:33.279
<v Speaker 1>and by that I mean your life.

603
00:32:33.880 --> 00:32:35.640
<v Speaker 3>Yeah, what do you want that to be?

604
00:32:35.640 --> 00:32:39.119
<v Speaker 1>Because you only have so many days, so that faster

605
00:32:39.279 --> 00:32:41.039
<v Speaker 1>you can get an idea of what you want that

606
00:32:41.119 --> 00:32:43.799
<v Speaker 1>to be, the faster you can start moving towards it.

607
00:32:44.960 --> 00:32:49.119
<v Speaker 3>And just always remembering your why why you're doing it.

608
00:32:49.279 --> 00:32:50.559
<v Speaker 3>And yeah, my.

609
00:32:50.559 --> 00:32:53.200
<v Speaker 2>First book is about chaos to clarity, And I always

610
00:32:53.279 --> 00:32:59.359
<v Speaker 2>say that that that trauma, that addiction, that life is

611
00:32:59.599 --> 00:33:03.559
<v Speaker 2>chaos us and even like the hamster wheel like you're

612
00:33:03.599 --> 00:33:08.079
<v Speaker 2>talking about, like that's just a way not to face

613
00:33:08.559 --> 00:33:13.559
<v Speaker 2>any of the stuff that is you're trying to push

614
00:33:13.599 --> 00:33:16.880
<v Speaker 2>down and mask, right, because I wore that mask.

615
00:33:16.720 --> 00:33:18.240
<v Speaker 3>For a lot of years.

616
00:33:18.839 --> 00:33:23.079
<v Speaker 2>And it's when you make that decision to surrender and

617
00:33:23.160 --> 00:33:27.519
<v Speaker 2>get quiet and do the practices that you're talking about,

618
00:33:28.400 --> 00:33:34.319
<v Speaker 2>that that clarity begins to come. And it was interesting.

619
00:33:34.359 --> 00:33:37.359
<v Speaker 2>I was asked the other day, is quiet and peace

620
00:33:37.400 --> 00:33:41.079
<v Speaker 2>the same thing? No, because in quietness you can feel

621
00:33:41.079 --> 00:33:44.799
<v Speaker 2>like your skin's going to crawl, or you can feel

622
00:33:45.720 --> 00:33:51.839
<v Speaker 2>joy and strength and peace in that time, and that's

623
00:33:51.920 --> 00:33:56.720
<v Speaker 2>when you really that quiet time is productive time.

624
00:33:57.759 --> 00:34:02.440
<v Speaker 3>Right, and you invite that to your day. For me,

625
00:34:02.519 --> 00:34:03.559
<v Speaker 3>it's daily, I.

626
00:34:03.440 --> 00:34:06.920
<v Speaker 2>Have to have it. It is a reset for me

627
00:34:07.839 --> 00:34:12.519
<v Speaker 2>and my brain. I don't know if that is the

628
00:34:12.559 --> 00:34:16.039
<v Speaker 2>same for you, but that hamster wheel I no longer need.

629
00:34:16.159 --> 00:34:21.880
<v Speaker 2>I need that quiet time to reboot and allow.

630
00:34:23.679 --> 00:34:25.840
<v Speaker 3>Allowed just the download to happen.

631
00:34:26.519 --> 00:34:30.639
<v Speaker 1>Yeah. I think what's been an interesting shift to me

632
00:34:30.760 --> 00:34:33.559
<v Speaker 1>is that I always worked out very early in the morning,

633
00:34:35.079 --> 00:34:37.840
<v Speaker 1>and what I didn't realize at the time was that

634
00:34:37.960 --> 00:34:41.239
<v Speaker 1>was me regulating my nervous system so that I could

635
00:34:42.039 --> 00:34:45.559
<v Speaker 1>fight through the rest of the day. Yeah, And so

636
00:34:46.360 --> 00:34:48.639
<v Speaker 1>that was the only time that nobody needed anything from me.

637
00:34:48.719 --> 00:34:51.400
<v Speaker 1>And I was relatively like physically and emotionally safe and

638
00:34:51.440 --> 00:34:54.679
<v Speaker 1>all the things. And I'm still I'm an early raiser,

639
00:34:54.960 --> 00:34:58.079
<v Speaker 1>but my morning's now to your point or where I

640
00:34:58.079 --> 00:35:02.079
<v Speaker 1>get centered and clear, I don't have that need to

641
00:35:02.519 --> 00:35:05.239
<v Speaker 1>you know, flush all the cortisol and like really get

642
00:35:05.280 --> 00:35:08.119
<v Speaker 1>myself stealed and ready to like fight through the day.

643
00:35:08.599 --> 00:35:11.360
<v Speaker 1>And instead now I have the opportunity to sit still

644
00:35:12.719 --> 00:35:15.239
<v Speaker 1>and be clear around how I'm going to show up

645
00:35:16.280 --> 00:35:20.199
<v Speaker 1>for the day and getting centered like that every day,

646
00:35:20.360 --> 00:35:22.400
<v Speaker 1>seven days a week, so it's not a Monday through

647
00:35:22.400 --> 00:35:25.000
<v Speaker 1>Friday situation. I need it probably much more on the

648
00:35:25.000 --> 00:35:26.679
<v Speaker 1>weekends when it's just me and the kids that I'm

649
00:35:26.760 --> 00:35:30.760
<v Speaker 1>not fighting for my life, but it just allows me

650
00:35:30.800 --> 00:35:33.280
<v Speaker 1>to have those moments of peace and clarity so that

651
00:35:33.760 --> 00:35:36.639
<v Speaker 1>as I move through the rest of the day, there's

652
00:35:36.639 --> 00:35:40.079
<v Speaker 1>that grounding exercise and that centered And what I also

653
00:35:40.159 --> 00:35:42.880
<v Speaker 1>know too, is that sometimes the day does what it

654
00:35:42.920 --> 00:35:45.400
<v Speaker 1>does days, you know, get out of control, and so

655
00:35:45.920 --> 00:35:48.679
<v Speaker 1>then I carve out fifteen or twenty minutes where it's

656
00:35:48.760 --> 00:35:52.760
<v Speaker 1>me and a walk and silence and the birds or

657
00:35:52.800 --> 00:35:55.519
<v Speaker 1>whatever is out there, just to kind of get back

658
00:35:55.519 --> 00:35:58.280
<v Speaker 1>to that place that I set in the morning.

659
00:35:58.760 --> 00:36:02.280
<v Speaker 2>Yeah, yeah, and the gratitude practice changed my life. And

660
00:36:03.039 --> 00:36:06.480
<v Speaker 2>there's all kinds of practices that we can introduce in

661
00:36:06.480 --> 00:36:10.760
<v Speaker 2>our lives. And I'm going to just take one quick

662
00:36:10.840 --> 00:36:14.159
<v Speaker 2>break on that note. And this is for the women

663
00:36:14.239 --> 00:36:20.000
<v Speaker 2>out there that are negatively coping and are ready to

664
00:36:20.039 --> 00:36:21.360
<v Speaker 2>get back to themselves.

665
00:36:21.719 --> 00:36:24.000
<v Speaker 3>So we'll be right back.

666
00:36:24.599 --> 00:36:27.320
<v Speaker 2>Are you in the first thirty days of sobriety or

667
00:36:27.360 --> 00:36:30.280
<v Speaker 2>wondering if now is your time to start? Hi?

668
00:36:30.599 --> 00:36:32.920
<v Speaker 3>I'm Marcy Hopkins and I wrote wake Up You're Not

669
00:36:33.039 --> 00:36:35.800
<v Speaker 3>Broken just for you. It's a real.

670
00:36:35.800 --> 00:36:38.840
<v Speaker 2>Raw guide to those first thirty days, what no one

671
00:36:38.920 --> 00:36:41.960
<v Speaker 2>tells you, what you will feel, and how to keep going.

672
00:36:42.559 --> 00:36:46.800
<v Speaker 2>This isn't about perfection, it's about progress. Or to your

673
00:36:46.880 --> 00:36:52.199
<v Speaker 2>copy now on Amazon. Remember You're not alone, You're not broken,

674
00:36:52.599 --> 00:36:57.440
<v Speaker 2>You're waking up. Welcome back, Melissa. What an incredible conversation

675
00:36:58.079 --> 00:37:03.079
<v Speaker 2>that we've been having. And it's so this conversation has

676
00:37:03.079 --> 00:37:06.119
<v Speaker 2>been so insightful, and I think that so many of

677
00:37:06.199 --> 00:37:11.280
<v Speaker 2>us can resonate and connect and learn. So just tell

678
00:37:11.360 --> 00:37:15.800
<v Speaker 2>us more about how the company you own, how it's helping,

679
00:37:15.880 --> 00:37:17.519
<v Speaker 2>and how we can connect with you.

680
00:37:18.039 --> 00:37:23.400
<v Speaker 1>Sure, So on call COO is a fractional chief operating

681
00:37:23.440 --> 00:37:27.920
<v Speaker 1>officer staffing agency as well as OPS manager placement agency.

682
00:37:27.920 --> 00:37:29.840
<v Speaker 1>So what does that mean Because it's a bunch of gobblybook.

683
00:37:30.360 --> 00:37:34.119
<v Speaker 1>So we provide strategic operations leadership inside of small businesses

684
00:37:35.039 --> 00:37:36.920
<v Speaker 1>and if we need a helper to come with us

685
00:37:36.960 --> 00:37:38.800
<v Speaker 1>to do stuff and get stuff done, that's where the

686
00:37:38.800 --> 00:37:43.800
<v Speaker 1>operations manager comes in. We found that often the executive

687
00:37:43.840 --> 00:37:46.039
<v Speaker 1>leader knows exactly what needs to happen and it's just

688
00:37:46.159 --> 00:37:50.400
<v Speaker 1>cheaper to have a sidekick to do it. And we

689
00:37:50.480 --> 00:37:54.960
<v Speaker 1>work for and with founders that have businesses that range

690
00:37:55.079 --> 00:37:57.760
<v Speaker 1>from three million on ups. So we've even worked with

691
00:37:57.760 --> 00:38:00.559
<v Speaker 1>one hundred million dollar company in the past. Across every

692
00:38:00.559 --> 00:38:03.960
<v Speaker 1>industry you name it, we have touched it. I was

693
00:38:03.960 --> 00:38:06.159
<v Speaker 1>not able to say that until we hit manufacturing and

694
00:38:06.360 --> 00:38:08.800
<v Speaker 1>energy last year and now I'm like, okay, apparently we

695
00:38:09.400 --> 00:38:12.119
<v Speaker 1>can do it all around here. And we do help

696
00:38:12.159 --> 00:38:14.639
<v Speaker 1>businesses blow the three million dollar mark as well. So

697
00:38:14.679 --> 00:38:17.519
<v Speaker 1>it's not like there's there's not solutions. It's just that

698
00:38:18.039 --> 00:38:21.079
<v Speaker 1>getting a fractional executive inside of your business that's there,

699
00:38:21.960 --> 00:38:25.559
<v Speaker 1>you know, part time, but invested in your business, that's

700
00:38:25.679 --> 00:38:28.000
<v Speaker 1>you really want them. When you've goten to a place

701
00:38:28.000 --> 00:38:29.239
<v Speaker 1>where you know what you're selling, you know who you're

702
00:38:29.239 --> 00:38:30.639
<v Speaker 1>selling it to, and you've been over and over and

703
00:38:30.639 --> 00:38:33.559
<v Speaker 1>over again and you've shown that that model really.

704
00:38:33.280 --> 00:38:33.920
<v Speaker 3>Works for you.

705
00:38:34.320 --> 00:38:36.719
<v Speaker 1>And before that, what we do is we provide strategic

706
00:38:36.760 --> 00:38:40.280
<v Speaker 1>guidance and support to help you get to that stage.

707
00:38:41.039 --> 00:38:43.559
<v Speaker 1>The best way to connect with us is to go

708
00:38:43.599 --> 00:38:46.280
<v Speaker 1>to my website, which is Melissa Franks dot com and

709
00:38:46.920 --> 00:38:49.360
<v Speaker 1>we offer free consultation call. So the good news is

710
00:38:49.400 --> 00:38:52.719
<v Speaker 1>you can get on a call with a seasoned executive.

711
00:38:53.159 --> 00:38:55.760
<v Speaker 1>You get thirty minutes of you know, free advice. So

712
00:38:55.840 --> 00:38:57.760
<v Speaker 1>come in with your problems, lay it all on the line,

713
00:38:57.760 --> 00:39:00.239
<v Speaker 1>and you'll walk away with at least a few solutions

714
00:39:00.239 --> 00:39:02.960
<v Speaker 1>and answers. And if we think that we can help

715
00:39:02.960 --> 00:39:04.280
<v Speaker 1>you in the long term, we'll let you know how

716
00:39:04.320 --> 00:39:04.760
<v Speaker 1>you can do that.

717
00:39:05.679 --> 00:39:11.639
<v Speaker 2>Amazing, amazing, Melissa, And thank you for your advocacy around

718
00:39:12.639 --> 00:39:17.360
<v Speaker 2>physical abuse and women that are abused and we just

719
00:39:17.519 --> 00:39:21.199
<v Speaker 2>it's so needed for us to get educated and bring

720
00:39:21.239 --> 00:39:25.280
<v Speaker 2>awareness and help others. And thank you for the work

721
00:39:25.280 --> 00:39:28.840
<v Speaker 2>that you're doing to help everyone out there in this

722
00:39:28.920 --> 00:39:29.719
<v Speaker 2>corporate world.

723
00:39:29.800 --> 00:39:32.320
<v Speaker 3>And you know, actually it's.

724
00:39:32.320 --> 00:39:35.280
<v Speaker 2>Business owners, right, but they're creating corporate world. You know,

725
00:39:35.360 --> 00:39:40.039
<v Speaker 2>they're creating their own corporate businesses, right, so corporations. So

726
00:39:40.639 --> 00:39:43.159
<v Speaker 2>thank you again again Melissa for coming on Wake Up

727
00:39:43.199 --> 00:39:46.360
<v Speaker 2>with Marcy and helping us to wake up to our

728
00:39:46.400 --> 00:39:47.039
<v Speaker 2>best selves.

729
00:39:47.920 --> 00:39:49.480
<v Speaker 1>Thank you. It was great to be here.

730
00:39:50.159 --> 00:39:51.079
<v Speaker 3>All right, Melissa.

731
00:39:51.159 --> 00:39:54.719
<v Speaker 2>Thank you all so much for listening and being here

732
00:39:54.760 --> 00:39:58.639
<v Speaker 2>with us today. And please reach out to Melissa and

733
00:39:59.119 --> 00:40:03.079
<v Speaker 2>just remember that you are not broken, you are becoming,

734
00:40:03.599 --> 00:40:06.519
<v Speaker 2>and that your past does not define you and it

735
00:40:06.599 --> 00:40:10.199
<v Speaker 2>is time to wake up to your worth and join

736
00:40:10.280 --> 00:40:14.440
<v Speaker 2>me next Thursday with an all new episode, and wishing

737
00:40:14.480 --> 00:40:17.159
<v Speaker 2>you the most amazing week and I'll see you soon.

738
00:40:17.360 --> 00:40:19.199
<v Speaker 3>Bye,