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Speaker 1: Yesterday or the day before yesterday in a podcast, I

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read an email that I got that was very critical

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of me, and I don't know why I read it.

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It's a lot of things I do, kind of straightening

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up my desk here, don't pay no attention to the

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mass behind me. I am a total disorganized wreck my office.

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That's why I never show my office because it's such

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a wreck. But I don't know why I read that email.

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It was a spur of the moment kind of thing

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because I mentioned it when I did the intro to

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the video, and I knew it was close on my inbox,

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so I just pulled it up and read it. Because

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and those emails don't bother me. Some people may think

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that they do bother me, but after a while, you

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get thick skin and it's not a big deal. It's

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just not a big deal. If you're going to be

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in this this internet game, you're gonna get a lot

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of criticism, and that's fine. I don't know why people

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do it, and that's why I read it, because it

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doesn't Those kind of things don't make sense to me.

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Because if I'm looking through videos on YouTube or Instagram

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or Facebook or TikTok. I feel no need to be

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critical of the of the creator because that's just what

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they're doing. I may look over at my wife and say,

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is this stupid or what? Or Hey, this is good,

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isn't it. So that's kind of where it comes from.

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I've never spent much time around people that are ugly

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to other people. I've met several in my life. If

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you're a man, you know, you kind of grow up

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fighting and defending yourself and those kind of things are natural.

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But just as an adult, you know, to be around

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like I see these Karen videos and stuff. I've never

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run in to anybody like that ever. I wonder where

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these people live. I don't know. I don't know. It's

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just funny to me. Anyway. I read that email that

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I said it was a woman, but it was actually

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a man. I didn't realize that. I think my brain

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was telling me it was a Karen, but it wasn't.

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It was a man. But today, about five o'clock in

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the morning, I walked out on the porch to have

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a cup of coffee and this was the first email

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I got, and he sent me a letter of apology.

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So I'm not going to read his email and be

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critical of him and then let this apology go. So

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this is not a story video. I know I talk

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a lot. I'm sorry, it's this thing. I don't move

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this thing down a little bit, hopefully it won't fall over.

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I'm not going to let it go without you hearing

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his apology. And I've had I've told you before. I

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get probably a dozen nasty emails a year, and I

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usually don't respond to them. I have responded to a couple.

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Most time I delete them, but maybe ten percent of

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the people kind of realize after they've sent it that, oh,

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that was a mistake, not because I read it. I

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don't read hardly any of these on the podcast. This

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one just happened to be a spur of the moment thing,

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and I read it. There was no nothing that made

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this one different from any of the others, even though

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the wording was different. But I cannot read one on

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the podcast a bad one without reading his response to that.

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And he says in his life, I'm going to read

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it to you, And he says in his email he

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was going to apologize to me the next day. Anyway,

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it was on his mind, and before I even get started,

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I want to say to this gentleman, thank you. I'm

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glad you owed me, are you. I'm glad that you

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didn't owe me one. I'm glad that you sent an

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apology letter that tells me this is a full grown man.

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Let me say before I go any further, I am

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guilty of popping off about different things. I have been

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in many stages of my life. You get frustrated with something,

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it doesn't matter what it is around people, you get impatient,

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get If you're opinionated in any way, and you have,

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especially a male, you have a certain level of testosterone

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running through your veins. You tend to say what you

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think is right, and you say it in a way

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that hurts other people. I've done it a hundred times,

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and if I catch it, if I'm conscious of it,

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and the person did not deserve it, then I apologize,

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just like this man has done. So I want to

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tell him, thank you, thank you very much. You don't

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owe me anything. I want you to please continue listening

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to the podcast, extend to me some grace that I'm

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not a professional. I'm a person in the construction business.

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I'm not I don't have any I have a little

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college education, but it's not. It would not have trained

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me to be a grammar or English expert, or even

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knowledgeable in those areas. I let the software correct my

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grammar if it will, I let the software correct my spelling.

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Thank goodness for good software. It will check grammar. Anyway.

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I'm just rambling, but I want to read you his

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letter and this is very very good, good evening, and

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happy Halloween. A few moments ago, I listened to the

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what If It's True podcast in which you read the

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shorter email very maturely sent to you earlier this week.

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Before listening, I was already going to apologize to you tonight.

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You refer to me as a lady, but I'm a

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man and that is no big deal, and I thought

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it was funny or amusing. You also said something is

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wrong with this person, and you are correct. I have

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a horrible meanstreak, not all the time, but much too often,

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and I realized that I need to lighten up and

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be more civil and more positive and less negative. I'm

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very sorry for insulting you, mister Buckner, including saying get

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a brain. That was ludicrous and inexcusable of me. Sometimes

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I think how I must care more about words and

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correctness than about people. I remember being hypocritical at the

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age of seven. These days, and I'm a year older

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than you, that attribute is amplified. As a perfectionist writer

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and speaker, I hold everyone else to very high standards,

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even to the extent of condemning them. Such condemnation is wrong.

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My family is a literary family, grammar champions, writers and poets,

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and we all notice errors everywhere all the time, on newscasts, billboards,

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store signs. But none of the other family members react

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as hatefully and anally as I do. Perfectionism is a curse.

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Two or three months ago, I sent you an email

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from my primary email address in which I praised you

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as a good reader with a very good voice, and

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I complimented you for having your own podcast. I do

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not think poorly of you. I just get so extremely

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frustrated when everyone, not just you, makes spelling errors, pronunciation errors, etc.

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And I sometimes personalize these reactions by attacking people with words,

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even viciously. My behavior is irrational and just playing bad

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too much of the time. Just from listening to you,

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I can tell you are a good person and a

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man of integrity. You obviously are intelligent, I'm not. Intelligence

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is a necessity of having a podcast in my perspective,

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So cruelly telling you to get a brain was absolutely

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stupid of me, and I'm very sorry. Also, in a

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recent in a recent episode of What If It's True,

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you exhorted us listeners not to send you hateful emails.

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But I did that anyway. That was very disrespectful of me,

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and I heartily apologize for the disrespect. Now, there are

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people who will say something ugly to someone and then

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they'll just go, I'm sorry. This is not one of those.

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This is a well this man thought about what he said,

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and I don't want to spend any more time on

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making him feel bad. I want him to know that

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I'm friends with you, and I know you are friends

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with me, and I believe you, and I have every

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reason to believe that you don't really think the things

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that you put in your first email. I am not

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critical of people with just about anything. I think. I

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probably am. I may be and not know it. I'm

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a flawed I'm a flawed man, very flawed man, and

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so I'm sure of that. I've done that before, and

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I'm sure I do it. And I don't even think

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about it, but I don't say much about it. I usually,

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especially you know, in my middle aged years now, I

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will just walk away and not say anything. And that

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is because I understand that I'm not really good at anything.

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I don't feel like i'm good at anything, so I

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don't feel like I can give anyone any critical advice

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or criticisms, even helpful advice. Usually I preface it with

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maybe you could try this, what do you think about that?

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Or maybe just you know, I just don't feel like

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I'm good at anything, so I'm not very critical. So

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it's hard to understand why somebody would send an email

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that's critical to just a podcaster who's having fun. I mean,

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you can tell in my demeanor maybe in the podcast,

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that I just love doing this. I don't, and I

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don't feel like I read very well. I don't feel

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like I read these stories like I hear them in

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my head, maybe a little bit like adults used to

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read to me when I was younger. But what you

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hear is how I read, how I hear it in

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my mind. When I'm reading short stories, audio books, emails

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from listeners, I'm not trained. I don't. There are a

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few people say, oh, man, you're awesome at this. I'm not.

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I would never be picked, never be chosen to narrate

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a best selling book ever, because of my accent and

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the way that I speak, and because it's not professional.

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The sound of my voice may sound good to you,

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but there's way more to it than that. And I

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don't know if you remember years ago, not years ago,

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but maybe months ago, I talked about a subject of

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knowing your place. You have to know your place as

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you go through life, in any situation, any group of people,

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any organization, whether it be business, church, social groups, whatever,

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you have to know your place. You cannot go through

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life going thinking of yourself more than you are. You

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can't do that. You are doomed to failure if you

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do that. I don't know if that's humility or what.

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But I learned that a long time ago working for

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a massive steel company, when a general manager explained to

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me what that meant, by knowing your place, knowing when

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to speak, knowing when not to speak, knowing when to listen.

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And it took me a long time to learn how

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to listen. I was always so full of this talking

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that I wouldn't listen to people in it and it's

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an acquired skill for me. It is I don't listen

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very well. But in this world of story narration and stuff,

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which is such a trivial little thing to even think about,

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I know my place. I know my place. It's on

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this podcast and doing probably independent author published books because

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I give them a good deal. I'm like, when I

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narrate audio books, I'm like, I'll just I'll give you

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the audio, you go sell it on audible. I didn't

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used to do that, but I do that now. So

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I give them the audio free so I can put

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it on the podcast. And I earn income from ad

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revenue by releasing audio books and short stories and things

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like that. I don't know I could. I'm looking at

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this timer here, it's thirteen minutes. This email really moved

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me this morning. And if the man was here in

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front of me, I would hug his neck. Probably he's

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probably a type a personality. It goes back to knowing

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your place. People like that are not very responsive to

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physical touch and all. He may or may not be

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that way, but I would want to hug his neck

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and say, man, I love you. It's okay, no big deal,

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no big deal, it's all under the bridge. I don't care.

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And when I say I'll never think about it again,

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I damn well mean that I want to even think

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it about it again. The only thing I will remember

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is what a nice email this was. Speaking of which,

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through the years, I have talked about people being ugly

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in the comment section and through emails, and that is

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not fair to the people to the thousand to one

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emails that I get from viewers who send me nice emails.

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It's a thousand to one and I'm going to say

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this not in a braggy sort of way, but I'm

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going to give you a little taste. And I'm not

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going to remember them all and I can't respond to

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I get a lot of emails. I don't know why,

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but I can't respond to all of them. But it

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would be hard to remember all the emails that I've

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got of people who have said things like I'm trying

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to I'm going to think of the ones that just

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hit me right now. There have been several from people

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who are going through recovery from some sort of addiction

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to a substance, alcohol, drugs, whatever, And I bet I've

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gotten I don't know how many people saying you your

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narrations helped me through that. That was never the intention

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of this podcast. The only intention I ever had was

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to be just have fun doing this. That's it. I

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don't I don't care about anything else. I just am

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having fun. But that if there are some byproducts of

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what is I'm doing, it makes me feel very good

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that somebody who is in recovery and who is look,

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that's hard. That is hard, hard, hard, it's hard to do.

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And they and you use anything that you can get

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because you have a you have tonal vision, a single

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track mission to break free of the substance. You'll use

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anything to get through it. And that people would use

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these my podcasts to help them get through that, that's unreal.

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I had a woman not long ago tell me that

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she would listen this is crazy. She would listen to

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my podcast and she was pregnant. She had a baby

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that was soon to be born, and I think she

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said that the baby would get you know, mother's how

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I remember my wife when she was pregnant. I would

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put my hands on her bellies and the kicking in

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the feet and all that stuff, and you can see

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their head roll around in their belly. It's almost creepy,

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but it's beautiful in a way. She said that she

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would put on the podcast and the baby would be

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kicking like crazy and hurting her. This is late late

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in the pregnancy, and she would put on my podcasts

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and the baby would calm down. And then she said

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that the little girl was born and when she gets fussy,

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probably not all the time, but sometimes she would put

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on the podcast and the baby would settle down. How

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cool is that. That was never the intention of this podcast.

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It was never to help anyone. It was all selfish

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for me, just to try to do something that made

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me happy. But in the in the process of all that,

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it seems to make other people happy. I have gotten

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emails from people, older people from older generations saying, I

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am a housebound, homebound they're alone, they don't have, you know,

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maybe they don't have, whatever the situation, but they're alone

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a lot. And they say, you've been such a good

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friend to me listen to you know, reading these stories,

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and you know, I don't know what to say to them,

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thank you for letting me know that. It makes me

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feel so good and it gives me steam to do more.

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I'm trying to think of people recovering from surgeries, talking

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about the how listening to the podcast kind of got

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them through recovery. Oh, there are others, and I wish

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I could think of them, and I do answer some

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of those, but I'm telling you back, it's not that

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much anymore. But back daring from twenty to early twenty

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twenty three, I was getting sometimes twenty emails a day

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from some Half of them are stories, and half of

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them are people just saying they enjoy the podcast. People

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don't have to do that. People don't have to do

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They don't have to take the time to sit out

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and send an email, but they do. And I'll tell

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you something else over I've wanted to say these things

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to y'all forever, and I just I don't like to

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talk about myself. That's why there's no story in this video,

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so people don't have to watch it. But I have

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a po box that's listed in the description or somewhere

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in the about page on my channel. I have received

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more gifts, books, wood carvings, metalworking projects, and most of

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them are Bigfoot related good books that I've read, just

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gift after gift after gift, and I never make it

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a thing on the channel, and that there's one reason

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for that. It's because I don't want people to do that.

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I don't want if you talk about it, it makes

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it happen more. I've seen other channels where people love

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that stuff. I don't want anything from you, and I

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don't mean that in a bad way. What I mean is,

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let me just read these narra and keep putting these

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podcasts out and you just enjoy it. The income from

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the ad revenue is fine with me. I don't need.

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And I know people will say, well, you need to

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accept gifts from people, and I will if you send them,

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I'll be thankful for them, but I'm not going to

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talk about them on the channel because because it just

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encourages people to do more and I don't want you

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taking time. So there's some people will say, you know,

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you just don't know how to take a gift. I don't.

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I'll admit that I don't know how to do it.

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So anyway, six years into this, probably fifty gifts from people,

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and I know they're sitting there thinking, you know, he

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never said thank you for that, he never acknowledged it,

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and I don't get many anymore, and I'm happy with that.

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All I want to do is do these stories you guys,

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enjoy them, and then go back to my life. That's

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all all I want to do. But to the people

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who have sent me gifts through the years, you are

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so generous and I'm so thankful that you thought of

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me to do that Christmas gifts, just general stuff through

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the year. Anyway, reading this email made me feel very good,

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made me feel very appreciative and thankful and humble. This

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man's humbled me because I wasn't angry with his email.

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I was just good. God man, Why would somebody take

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the time to send that? But now he took the

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time to send a much longer, well thought out, heart

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felt he says at the end, I heartily apologize for

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the disrespect. I accept that apology. As Val Kilmer said,

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we off friends now in Tombstone. We be friends now anyway,

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okay man twenty two minutes. Nobody's gonna watch this video

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all the way through, but it is my channel. I

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don't get to talk to many people. I'm out here

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in the sticks all by myself and the you know.

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I feel like I'm on a desert island out here sometimes,

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but I like it. I like the solitude I like

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being by myself. I like doing my own thing, but

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there really is nobody to kind of express your thoughts

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and feelings too, So that's what I'm doing here. So

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thank you all for watching this. I'm sorry it's so long,

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and I hope the gentleman who wrote this, who wrote

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this apology to me, sees this. This is a podcast

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just for him, basically or spurred on by him, So

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thank you. Okay, Fiction Friday is tonight. I've got a

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really good couple of scenes out of a great novel

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that I'm going to read to you, and I hope

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you guys enjoy it, so get ready for that. I

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think it'll post around six pm tonight, and when you

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hear it, I hope you want to buy this woman's

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book because she is one hell of a writer and

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storyteller and a really nice person with a really nice family.

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I've gotten to kind of digitally know them, and they

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are very good people. So anyway, listen to that tonight.

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And since I never know how to say bye, I'm

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just going to say it's a Southern thing. We don't

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know how to end a conversation, but I'll end it here,

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So thanks for listening. And we'll see you tonight on

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Fiction Friday. Thanks