Speaker 1: This is Pod Popular Podcast for the People, the Great
Speaker 1: Love Debate. It's the Great Love Debate, the Great Love Debate.
Speaker 2: It's a Great Love Debase.
Speaker 1: Hi, get everyone, it's Brian how We welcome to the
Speaker 1: Great Love Debate, the world's number one dating and relationship
Speaker 1: podcast in twenty fifteen. I'm back here in the very
Speaker 1: fine studios of Pod Popular Podcast. I was gonna say
Speaker 1: podcast for the people. This one's different. This one's the
Speaker 1: elevated media experience. I'm at the one in Scottsdale, Arizona.
Speaker 1: It is the peak, peak peak, Scott's Dazzle here right now,
Speaker 1: So try and find parking outside of the studio. I
Speaker 1: want to talk about something that I've touched on a
Speaker 1: few times before I get in trouble for touching on.
Speaker 1: It doesn't mean I'm wrong. And that is the concept
Speaker 1: of girl on girl crime. And I think it is rampant.
Speaker 1: I think it is a problem. And you might be like,
Speaker 1: what does that mean? And like girls getting in fights
Speaker 1: in locker rooms. Not really, it's I think there's a dirty,
Speaker 1: little undercurrent of girls and their friends and their bfsfs
Speaker 1: maybe not exactly rooting for their friend to have success,
Speaker 1: maybe not hoping that they're in a relationship, maybe not
Speaker 1: hoping that their life goes well. Until my life goes well.
Speaker 1: There's a lot of that. There's a lot going on.
Speaker 1: I want to talk about it, So I'm bringing somebody
Speaker 1: in here who may or may not be a pro
Speaker 1: on this. She was on our podcast fairly recently. I
Speaker 1: sort of pigeonholed her into answering a bunch of listener letters.
Speaker 1: She had our holiday mail bag. But she's back. She
Speaker 1: has some thoughts on this, she has some experience on this.
Speaker 1: She's an influencer. She's a mom, she's a beauty queen,
Speaker 1: she's a business owner. She's a badass. She's about to
Speaker 1: start her podcast called Unapologetically Me, Unapologetic Me, unapologetically we
Speaker 1: don't edit around here, Unapologetic Me. The Lovely Crystal Carol,
Speaker 1: how are you?
Speaker 2: I'm good?
Speaker 1: And because she's a lovely Crystal Carol, I threatened to
Speaker 1: promise whatever you guys, that there is gonna be video
Speaker 1: now on the Great Love Debate with Brian Howie. This
Speaker 1: is this is the maiden voyage. This is there's cameras rolling.
Speaker 1: You're the first that I've like caved in, like okay,
Speaker 1: the cameras are rolling out. You're the first. I know,
Speaker 1: you have just the right amount of makeup on and
Speaker 1: we're ready to roll. I know you've experienced this, but
Speaker 1: this starts. I've always made the comment that I don't
Speaker 1: think men cause insecurity. I think they prey on it.
Speaker 1: By the time boys get to the picture at when
Speaker 1: we're when you're sixteen, seventeen or whatever, you guys are
Speaker 1: already a little fucked up because at thirteen fourteen, you
Speaker 1: guys girls to each other. Are you gonna wear that?
Speaker 1: You're you gonna eat?
Speaker 3: That?
Speaker 1: Is he gonna call you? Creating this neurosis that by
Speaker 1: the time the men are confident enough to say hello
Speaker 1: to you, guys are already little insecure.
Speaker 3: You know.
Speaker 2: How do you know that?
Speaker 3: Right?
Speaker 1: Doing this a long time and my two sisters too.
Speaker 3: Which is so crazy, because I was just thinking on
Speaker 3: girl and Girl Crime, because I've man, I'm a hit
Speaker 3: list for it, and I was just thinking, do guys
Speaker 3: know it exists?
Speaker 2: Like do they understand the dynamics of women?
Speaker 1: I don't think so I do, because I've really, you know,
Speaker 1: I've worked with a lot of women. I've been around,
Speaker 1: I've directed theater and shows with you know, a dozen
Speaker 1: cast members, and people are always like, Oh, that's such
Speaker 1: a good job, and I'm like, that's the worst job
Speaker 1: ever for a straight guy. It's terrible. You see the cattiness,
Speaker 1: you see the insecurity. A lot of women are like, Oh,
Speaker 1: I'm so happy for you as long as she's in
Speaker 1: a good place herself. If she's not, I've seen, for example,
Speaker 1: this place is a hot bed for bachelorette parties. Scotts,
Speaker 1: Arizona is the number two bachelorette party place now after Nashville. Yep.
Speaker 1: The difference between a bachelor party and a bachelorette party
Speaker 1: is that men go to a bachelor party wanting to
Speaker 1: do bad things. Women go to a bachelorette party hoping
Speaker 1: the bride does bad things, and that's what's screwed up.
Speaker 1: They're like, oh, let's see if we can get her
Speaker 1: to do this, And I'm always like, that doesn't feel
Speaker 1: like a sisterhood, That doesn't feel like a rooting for
Speaker 1: her going on.
Speaker 2: No, I don't think there is. I don't think. I
Speaker 2: do not think most women root for other women.
Speaker 1: They don't.
Speaker 3: And you're for the underdog, the girl who's a couple
Speaker 3: hundred pounds and kind of fugly and oh, let's help Betty.
Speaker 3: But the pretty hot one with a ton of money
Speaker 3: and guys crawling all over her, No way are they
Speaker 3: rooting for that.
Speaker 1: And a lot of women are gonna listen to this.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get emails because I'm sure I'm gonna get
Speaker 1: and they're gonna be like, no, you don't know my
Speaker 1: friends they're right or die or whatever. And I'm like,
Speaker 1: your friends would blow you off in two seconds for
Speaker 1: a dude or for some other thing, like it just happens.
Speaker 1: And I'm not saying it's it's right or wrong or whatever.
Speaker 1: I'm just saying it's a real thing, and we have
Speaker 1: to we have to deal with it. And I'm not
Speaker 1: sure we The women spend a lot of time blaming
Speaker 1: the men for a lot of stuff, and I'm not
Speaker 1: saying that's not accurate either. I'm saying that it's not
Speaker 1: exactly like there's a lot of girls in your corner,
Speaker 1: a lot of things in your court either. No.
Speaker 3: I agree with you one thousand percent. I do think
Speaker 3: there's some rare females that are overly confident and maybe
Speaker 3: have been the you know, like I can honestly tell
Speaker 3: you I root for other women.
Speaker 2: But it's easy to say that when I'm me.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know, I'm the one that I apologetic you.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I have the most money. I men
Speaker 3: usually approach me.
Speaker 2: I mean, I don't lack confidence, but gosh.
Speaker 3: I have some beautiful friends that still aren't happy when
Speaker 3: I'm doing amazing and I don't get it because they're
Speaker 3: I mean, they're beautiful, Mike, what are you worried about me? For?
Speaker 1: So the Bachelor franchise, you know, eighty percent of the
Speaker 1: Bachelor audience is women. And there's a reason why the
Speaker 1: Bachelor rates so much higher than the Bachelorette. It's not
Speaker 1: because the Bachelor is about this question for love. The
Speaker 1: women want to see one man reject twenty three women.
Speaker 1: They don't want to see twenty three guys fighting over
Speaker 1: one woman. This is the kind of the dirty little
Speaker 1: secret of what this is about. And so I think,
Speaker 1: you know, I'm trying to talk about this. So the first,
Speaker 1: you know, step two it is sort of admitting that
Speaker 1: it's a problem, and then be it's sort of recognizing
Speaker 1: that if you're looking for dating advice or your best
Speaker 1: friend to tell you what you should do, or how
Speaker 1: to answer the guy, or to write your dating profile. Whatever.
Speaker 1: I'm not sure that's where you should go.
Speaker 2: I agree, well, look at the Housewives.
Speaker 1: Look at the Housewives.
Speaker 3: Your franchise is on rich, plastic women fucking each other over.
Speaker 2: Yes, and people love it. I'm not a.
Speaker 1: Women want the cat fight.
Speaker 3: I'm not a fan of Housewives, and I think it's
Speaker 3: because they don't enjoy that. But that's a franchise, and
Speaker 3: isn't that all it's about.
Speaker 2: It's just the cat fights.
Speaker 1: It really is the cat fights. And and the men
Speaker 1: get accused of wanting to watch a good cat fight.
Speaker 1: I'm not saying we don't, but the women get off
Speaker 1: on it. And they're like they you know, they hope
Speaker 1: that you're dumb, they hope that you're bitchy, they hope
Speaker 1: that you're not successful. Nobody who doesn't know you until
Speaker 1: they know you, hopefully is necessary rooting for you. Oh god, no,
Speaker 1: they look at you. It's weird to be looked at
Speaker 1: as the competition by strangers.
Speaker 3: No, I think it's just an e I think women
Speaker 3: are like, you know, like cats, like wild cats. You know,
Speaker 3: they're out, they're fighting for the lion all the time.
Speaker 2: You know what I mean? So women are women are harsh,
Speaker 2: they're pretty brutal.
Speaker 1: You grew up not necessarily affluent. No, is that one?
Speaker 1: Is that a good way to put it?
Speaker 2: Definitely not. No, I'm a trailer poor girl at heart,
Speaker 2: for sure.
Speaker 1: Does this kind of behavior? Is it worse in an
Speaker 1: environment like that where everybody has very little or nothing?
Speaker 1: Was there a pretty and pink element in where you
Speaker 1: grew up, where there was one side of the tracks another?
Speaker 1: Or is it worse in a place like we're here now,
Speaker 1: like Scott Stillerzona, where it's it's wealthy. Is the behavior worse?
Speaker 2: I think?
Speaker 3: You know, in the eighties, when I grew up, affluent
Speaker 3: people hung with afluent people and poor people hung with
Speaker 3: poor people. There wasn't really crossovers, so there was that
Speaker 3: pretty impink, you know, construct and.
Speaker 2: I always wanted to be the affluent. And then I
Speaker 2: got to be with them, and.
Speaker 3: I realized, Man, I don't know what's worse because they're
Speaker 3: all hating on each other, they're all you know, they're
Speaker 3: definitely you know, it's crazy because you know, they just
Speaker 3: learned to be happy, but there's none of that. Somebody
Speaker 3: who's beautiful has it all, still is not happy and
Speaker 3: they're hating.
Speaker 2: I think it's insecurity.
Speaker 1: It's hard to even learn that when back in the
Speaker 1: in the early days of this show, I used to
Speaker 1: do a lot of talks and conferences and a lot
Speaker 1: of stuff where women would come and I would ask
Speaker 1: what is it that you need to be happy? And
Speaker 1: the list was mostly of what makes them unhappy? That
Speaker 1: list was ready to go what made them happy? They
Speaker 1: didn't really know because they hadn't spent quite enough time
Speaker 1: on thinking about that. They didn't even have the answer.
Speaker 1: So for a guy to come into your world and
Speaker 1: try and make you happy and increase your happiness when
Speaker 1: you're not even sure what that looks like, that's an
Speaker 1: invisible bullsy had to hit if I said what makes
Speaker 1: you unhappy? Boom boom boom. Now maybe you've had more
Speaker 1: experience with it, but the fact that that is foremost
Speaker 1: in the in the cortex for the women. I don't
Speaker 1: think men are like that. I don't think men like
Speaker 1: if I went out with my friends and they hooked up,
Speaker 1: I wasn't even half for them. I just didn't give
Speaker 1: a shit. I don't care. The women, on the other hand,
Speaker 1: are a lot like, wait, what, what does he do?
Speaker 3: What?
Speaker 1: They really want the details of it. I was indifferent
Speaker 1: to my friends.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, and they want to know.
Speaker 3: You know, I have that dating spree for a hot second,
Speaker 3: and I dated some pretty amazing guys that spoiled me rotten.
Speaker 3: I had some girlfriends that were so jealous and so
Speaker 3: petty that so many things are being.
Speaker 2: Bought for me.
Speaker 3: They started a whole circle of talking shit about me
Speaker 3: because ugh, what did Crystal get now?
Speaker 1: And ugh, you know, or what did she do?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: What did she do for that?
Speaker 3: And you know, it was just it was Crystal time
Speaker 3: all the time because they were jealous. So, you know,
Speaker 3: I think I just don't give a shit. Guys are
Speaker 3: just so.
Speaker 1: So yeah, we don't give a shit. Like I'm like,
Speaker 1: if she likes him, great, you.
Speaker 2: Know, or whatever your buddy does for a girl, you
Speaker 2: don't care.
Speaker 1: I don't care, you don't.
Speaker 2: Girls are really like he did what he got.
Speaker 1: Sometimes I'm like, good luck with that, or they'll use
Speaker 1: your name to their boyfriend.
Speaker 3: Well, Crystal's boyfriend bought her this and this and this.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Crystal expects to.
Speaker 3: Be treated like a queen, right, And the guy's like, ah, well, sorry,
Speaker 3: You're not Crystal.
Speaker 2: I'm not treating anybody like a queen.
Speaker 1: You know, how do you does this make you more
Speaker 1: reserve towards women because you assume there's going to be
Speaker 1: some sort of antagonistic bit, jealousy, anger, bitchiness, Do not
Speaker 1: trust easily? How do you deal with it? Because you're
Speaker 1: also raising daughters and they have friends and you're trying
Speaker 1: to impart lessons on them and a son. But you're
Speaker 1: trying to do that, like, how do you deal with
Speaker 1: making yourself or you're just indifferent towards it? Like who
Speaker 1: cares if they either like me or they don't.
Speaker 2: Well, you know, it's funny because you know, even even women,
Speaker 2: we dress for other women.
Speaker 1: We know, so you say we do not.
Speaker 2: Dress for Okay, listen, some women dress for men.
Speaker 3: But I'm saying, we get completely dressed up to go shopping.
Speaker 2: And to go to the mall, whatever we're doing. We
Speaker 2: really get dressed for other women.
Speaker 3: So I used to care what other women thought of me,
Speaker 3: and then I realized that's a losing game.
Speaker 2: So I just don't give a shit. But I do
Speaker 2: have three.
Speaker 3: Daughters, and I've taught them to treat everybody with kindness.
Speaker 3: And if anything, because you're beautiful, because you now come
Speaker 3: from money, you have to over extend your kind level
Speaker 3: and be extra sweet because you're intimidating the fuck out
Speaker 3: of that girl and that she's gonna be meaner. So
Speaker 3: the nicer you can be, you can drop down her
Speaker 3: insecurity guard and she'll start to be nice to you.
Speaker 1: I had a girlfriend once who educated me in Balenciaga
Speaker 1: and Lubitan and everything, and I go, I was like,
Speaker 1: who cares? Like what's the difference? And I go, I
Speaker 1: don't think the guys really care. She's like, the women
Speaker 1: notice the red soul. They're going to assume that you
Speaker 1: bought that that reflects well on you. And I'm like,
Speaker 1: I don't understand. She goes, let's try it one time.
Speaker 1: So we went to like meet some people, and she
Speaker 1: sat there and wiggled her foot so that she could
Speaker 1: see it. I did watch the women react to that.
Speaker 1: I did what Andy, They weren't necessary, and you know,
Speaker 1: she was an attorney, she was pretty successful. She could
Speaker 1: have bought them her own. But she looked at me like, see,
Speaker 1: they think that you're good because I'm wearing these shoes,
Speaker 1: and they do, but they're like this reflects well on you.
Speaker 1: The women are noticing what I wear. The women are
Speaker 1: noticing one of the the guys are just like, she's hot.
Speaker 1: You know, they didn't care because they don't speak fluent praduct.
Speaker 2: No, And I'm sure they thought you were the best
Speaker 2: boyfriend ever.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I when I was married, I had what a seven
Speaker 3: or eight carrot ring, and I would be in Chanelle
Speaker 3: dripping and women.
Speaker 2: Would say to me. The first thing a woman would
Speaker 2: say was, wow, you have a great husband. I'm like,
Speaker 2: you've never met him and sactly.
Speaker 3: Secondly, I bought this eight carrot, I bought this sl
Speaker 3: I work, but he got a.
Speaker 2: Lot of kudos. They just thought he was amazing on
Speaker 2: the way.
Speaker 3: I drussed because they made the assumption that he bought
Speaker 3: me everything.
Speaker 1: Right, so he got to eat benefit benefit. Yeah, he
Speaker 1: got to swim in your wake. All right, we have
Speaker 1: to swim in some seven eight caret water. He's here,
Speaker 1: so we got to take a quick break because I
Speaker 1: got to pay for stuff like this. I'm with Crystal Carol.
Speaker 1: We're talking about girl and girl crime. We'll be back
Speaker 1: right after this, and we are back. How does a
Speaker 1: woman is there a technique or is there a question
Speaker 1: or is there a read that you can do to
Speaker 1: be like, can I trust my sisters here? Can I
Speaker 1: trust my girlfriends? Or is it just like there's no scenario,
Speaker 1: everything is different. You kind of just have to be
Speaker 1: comfortable on your own and if they're with you, they're
Speaker 1: with you. And if they're not, they're not.
Speaker 3: Man.
Speaker 2: You cannot trust women.
Speaker 3: I tell my daughters the only person you can trust
Speaker 3: is your mom, your mom and your sisters.
Speaker 2: That's it. Women are not trustworthy.
Speaker 1: I don't know some moms you can't trust either. There's
Speaker 1: a lot of moms who are like, I gave up
Speaker 1: my career as a ballerina to have you. Yeah, And
Speaker 1: there's a resentment there is that. That's a thing. Okay,
Speaker 1: that's a thing. I know girl who had a friend
Speaker 1: for like twenty years. During most of those twenty years,
Speaker 1: she was unhappily married. Well, she got divorced and then
Speaker 1: started dating somebody who she was great. Suddenly when she
Speaker 1: was happy, the friend suddenly wasn't her best friend anymore.
Speaker 1: And she's like, was she friends with me that whole time?
Speaker 1: Because I was down in the dumps? It was crushing
Speaker 1: for her. It was like a betrayal.
Speaker 2: That is such a woman thing.
Speaker 1: Then that is such a woman thing. See, this is
Speaker 1: the thing. I'm never going to give the guys the credit.
Speaker 1: I'm very very hard on the men. This is one
Speaker 1: thing that I think we are better at. Like I
Speaker 1: think we are.
Speaker 2: I think you are too. Women are just jealous cat. Hey,
Speaker 2: I'm a woman, m h.
Speaker 3: And I'd rather hang out with a bunch of dudes
Speaker 3: any day, any day.
Speaker 1: Would you rather hang out with a bunch of This
Speaker 1: is like I said, we are in Scottsdal, Arizona here,
Speaker 1: this is like ground zero for I think the medical
Speaker 1: term is hot chicks. Would you rather roll into somewhere
Speaker 1: with a bunch of pretty women? Or would you rather
Speaker 1: be the belle of the ball?
Speaker 2: I don't necessarily think I'm bello of the ball.
Speaker 3: I just have a lot more fun with my guy
Speaker 3: friends because it's just so we're just there having a
Speaker 3: good time.
Speaker 2: You're there's no jealousy going on with each other.
Speaker 1: But aren't they all hitting on you in some way?
Speaker 2: My guy friends? Yeah, no, they're my besties.
Speaker 1: Well if I asked them, what would they say?
Speaker 2: They're my besties?
Speaker 1: I have a lot of guys like I just want
Speaker 1: to be friends with Crystal. She's so nice.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, yeah, they're like there's nobody, well you think
Speaker 4: they Some of them may have had crushes at one
Speaker 4: time or another, but I just have so much fun
Speaker 4: with them. Women, you get there and there's always just
Speaker 4: an issue, especially if a guy's talking to you and
Speaker 4: a guy's not talking to them.
Speaker 2: It just becomes problematic.
Speaker 1: Do you have a gay posse?
Speaker 2: I do, and one of my best friends is gay.
Speaker 1: That helps too, because you can get ninety percent of
Speaker 1: the benefit that you're going to get from your girlfriend.
Speaker 1: You're gonna get support and you look at with it
Speaker 1: out the jealousy and the cattiness. They are going to
Speaker 1: be supportive.
Speaker 2: But when I show up with him, everyone thinks we're married,
Speaker 2: so we can't.
Speaker 3: Well I couldn't meet any guys because my gay best
Speaker 3: friend is you know, a good looking older guy and
Speaker 3: it's Scottsdale.
Speaker 2: Yea Likeley assumed we're together, so I you.
Speaker 1: Know, guys don't Guys will fight through that.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, he puts his gay meter right on too.
Speaker 3: He's he likes guys straight or not.
Speaker 1: Okay, have you ever fought over the same guy? Never? Okay?
Speaker 1: The you dipped your tone to the pageant world. Yeah,
Speaker 1: isn't that just sort of a microcosm of this on
Speaker 1: like a grander scale.
Speaker 3: Everything they say about the pageant world is true. Those
Speaker 3: women are out for you. But you know, I think
Speaker 3: it's like that. I think you're right in the pageant world.
Speaker 3: It's very much so like that because I was new
Speaker 3: to the pageant world and I experienced it firsthand. But
Speaker 3: I mean, it even happens in politics. I mean, I
Speaker 3: our mayor is a female, and she's pretty.
Speaker 4: She is.
Speaker 1: There's a good looking mayor here, and.
Speaker 3: I see the woman on council just want to kill
Speaker 3: her and take her place.
Speaker 2: And it's because she's a woman.
Speaker 1: And she's hot, and she's hot, and I've heard people
Speaker 1: call her dumb, bimbo, idiot a million times. She's smarter,
Speaker 1: I know she is. There's a lot and most of
Speaker 1: that comes from other women. When you watch. You know,
Speaker 1: we're in as we record this, we're in award season, Oscars,
Speaker 1: Golden Globes, whatever you have. We're in early part of
Speaker 1: the year. It's the women who are watching team and
Speaker 1: be like, oh my god, what did she get done?
Speaker 1: Oh my god, she's so fat. Oh my god, it's
Speaker 1: the women who are choosing the magazine covers. It's the
Speaker 1: women who are judging other women on their appearance. The
Speaker 1: men have a very wide spectrum of what they put
Speaker 1: up with. It is the women being critical, and then
Speaker 1: the women will blame that. This is what society's liked.
Speaker 1: Everybody's judged on that. Not just by the dudes.
Speaker 3: Oh gosh, it's totally the women. I mean I look
Speaker 3: at someone and I'm like, what does she have done?
Speaker 2: Oh? She lost weight, she gained weight.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean I try not to be too critical
Speaker 3: because you know, I don't want to fall.
Speaker 2: Into that, but I do have interest in it.
Speaker 3: I mean, Chris Jenner, I'm well, I'm googling who are
Speaker 3: a plastic surgeon is?
Speaker 2: Because I want to use them. So we look at everything.
Speaker 3: We're looking at all everything they have on too. We're
Speaker 3: very like we check a woman from to her shoes, door,
Speaker 3: her bag, doorr jewelry.
Speaker 1: So you notice, oh and you can judge. Can you
Speaker 1: judge a woman's happiness by how she's presenting stuff? Or
Speaker 1: sometimes that's a cover upper, it's not related.
Speaker 2: I just think something echoes either way.
Speaker 3: I know people that have a shitload of money that
Speaker 3: are miserable, And I know I have people have a
Speaker 3: shitlttle money they're happy.
Speaker 2: It can go either way.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I know the money isn't going to make you happy.
Speaker 1: The money and a lot of times it just makes
Speaker 1: people behavioral worse. But you know, then there's the struggle
Speaker 1: on the Yeah, I mean, because you know the other
Speaker 1: end of it. The people with money who are unhappy
Speaker 1: generally were born into it. It's true, generally had it.
Speaker 1: You know. I used to have this challenge with my mom,
Speaker 1: who she basically like I was raised in a bowling
Speaker 1: alley like she grew up poor. I grew up. I
Speaker 1: don't know how wealthy we were, but there was no
Speaker 1: worry about money for you know, fifteen year old Brian.
Speaker 1: That was the least of our problem. There's no love
Speaker 1: in the house, but there was there was money. So
Speaker 1: it didn't register to me. It didn't register like needing
Speaker 1: something or wanting to do. But to her, she never
Speaker 1: forgot it, like she never quite got over Oh yeah
Speaker 1: that and what that feels like in what feeling looked
Speaker 1: down upon does and all that kind of stuff, And
Speaker 1: you know that should never be the scoreboard. It's every
Speaker 1: that but the people who are born into it. Then
Speaker 1: it's like, then, what part of success and life is
Speaker 1: the struggle?
Speaker 3: You know, it's tough because I'm opposite of your mom,
Speaker 3: maybe a little. I didn't grow up with anything, but
Speaker 3: I just always wanted it, and there's no chip on
Speaker 3: my shoulder about not having it. I just don't want
Speaker 3: to go back there because I remember the feeling.
Speaker 2: But my kids same thing.
Speaker 3: They grew up with everything, and they just they don't
Speaker 3: know what it's like to not have food or to
Speaker 3: be home homeless, right, yeah, And you can't.
Speaker 2: You can't explain it, can't.
Speaker 1: I mean, you can't role play it because they know
Speaker 1: on Monday they'll be back in a nice bed.
Speaker 3: I think it's character building, though, and I think maybe
Speaker 3: it's one of the reasons I'm not like a lot
Speaker 3: of the women here the hate. I mean, there's other
Speaker 3: shit to be worrying about for me, like I never
Speaker 3: want to be homeless.
Speaker 2: I don't want to be in a food line again.
Speaker 2: I mean, I'm so.
Speaker 3: Happy just being me that I don't have time really
Speaker 3: to be a mean girl to other bitches.
Speaker 1: You know, you brought up mean girl. That's so funny.
Speaker 1: I was gonna talk about that like mean girl's legit,
Speaker 1: Like the girls are very tribal and it's very cliquy,
Speaker 1: and it's very like it's a it's a it's a
Speaker 1: dangerous thing. The bring you bring up, the having money
Speaker 1: not having money again, it's not gonna buy happiness. Second,
Speaker 1: and it sometimes takes the struggle away. But musicians, the
Speaker 1: theory is that the musician's first album is always the
Speaker 1: best one because it comes from the struggle. The struggle
Speaker 1: builds creativity. The struggle bigs experience whatever. It's really hard.
Speaker 1: Fifth album in when you're just recording it from a mansion,
Speaker 1: you're not necessarily other than Taylor Sweest, she gets better
Speaker 1: and will give her credit with that, but most are,
Speaker 1: especially like the rappers, the ones who grew up in
Speaker 1: the street and it was violent like that lends it stealth.
Speaker 1: The creativity when you've kind of made it and you're
Speaker 1: a little bit out of your world that you know
Speaker 1: for most of your life, it's a little distant. It's
Speaker 1: hard to get from there.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, for sure. I mean, plus you have a record.
Speaker 3: Labe will breathing down your.
Speaker 1: Throat, that's true. And yeah, the what do you when
Speaker 1: you meet another woman and you decide. I mean, you
Speaker 1: have your daughters, So do you need to have girlfriends
Speaker 1: in your life?
Speaker 2: You know, I don't.
Speaker 3: I think you know this, Like my best friends are
Speaker 3: my daughters. I have friends that are more of acquaintances.
Speaker 3: But it just it never seems. I mean I just
Speaker 3: got in trouble recently. I met a girlfriend and her
Speaker 3: boyfriend and he was talking to me too long and
Speaker 3: they got in a fight, and I'm like, dude, you
Speaker 3: know me, like, I have no interest in your First
Speaker 3: of all, I'm five to ten. He was like five
Speaker 3: to four. Secondly, and I should say, firstly, he's.
Speaker 2: With my friend. In a million years, I would never
Speaker 2: look at him like that.
Speaker 3: They got in a big fight because he was giving
Speaker 3: me too much attention, and I was just getting to
Speaker 3: know the guy because I had heard all about him.
Speaker 3: But it was our first meeting. So it's just like,
Speaker 3: you can have good friends and it can still all
Speaker 3: go to shit. It's just not worth it.
Speaker 1: Were you always five ten? I mean when you like,
Speaker 1: were you tall at twelve?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I've always been the tallest girl.
Speaker 1: Did you need a tall guy?
Speaker 3: You know? I did for a second, and then I
Speaker 3: went for the nice guy, and the nice guys were
Speaker 3: always I mean, my ex.
Speaker 1: Is five ten, Okay, that's not short.
Speaker 2: Well compared to put some heels on me.
Speaker 1: Do you know a percentage of manner six feet?
Speaker 3: You know what I think over six foot one? I
Speaker 3: think it's like, is it like two three percent.
Speaker 1: Of the population it's over six feet? Oh, it's crazy,
Speaker 1: which I'm barely now. I'm five eleven three quarters, but
Speaker 1: I can round up. My driver's license is six feet
Speaker 1: is fourteen percent. So whenever six to two is like
Speaker 1: seven so. And the problem with being a tall girl
Speaker 1: is a lot of guys for six two don't want
Speaker 1: to date because the benefit of being six two six
Speaker 1: threes you get to feel six two six three with
Speaker 1: the girls five to four girls five to ten puts
Speaker 1: the lubitons on and she's six' one. He doesn't feel
Speaker 1: that great anymore. It's hard to dude, I know. But
Speaker 1: sometimes the short guys are the ones that are like, listen,
Speaker 1: I'm shorter than anybody. I'm I'm gonna go for that.
Speaker 1: And you know, you can stand on your wallet and
Speaker 1: be a little ballsy. But a lot of the shorter
Speaker 1: men who I do always have some sympathy for because
Speaker 1: I was five forard till I was a senior in
Speaker 1: high school, so I stared into the abyss. They're just like, listen,
Speaker 1: this is the deal. I'm gonna ask her out and
Speaker 1: see what happens. And you know there's an advantage of that.
Speaker 2: Well, the short ones tend to like me.
Speaker 3: It's interesting because you're right, the six one, six two,
Speaker 3: they like the little spinners, the little hun yeah, right,
Speaker 3: and then the little guy, you know, the little five
Speaker 3: six guys.
Speaker 1: I'm like, dude, they're like, fuck it, I'm shorter than her.
Speaker 1: Are to go for it.
Speaker 2: They're gonna and if they're gonna go for it, they're
Speaker 2: gonna go for it.
Speaker 1: Right.
Speaker 2: So it's cute. It's cute, but it still won't work.
Speaker 1: I mean five, but you were so you were really
Speaker 1: tall and growing up I was you weren't one of
Speaker 1: those like gross spurred people, nineteen.
Speaker 2: And a giant girl.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's tough. Now, the upside of that is you
Speaker 1: gain five pounds and nobody notices that's true. Five to one.
Speaker 1: You gave five pounds.
Speaker 2: It's rough, yo, gosh, it's really well.
Speaker 3: My daughter, my oldest daughter, the little blonde, she's beautiful,
Speaker 3: but she's five to three and she gains a few
Speaker 3: pounds and you see it. It is nice spreading it out.
Speaker 1: You're like, I'll eat that cake. It'll go to my elbows.
Speaker 1: Nobody will notice. Yeah, exactly what can girls do better
Speaker 1: to stop this seve cattiness? Yeah, don't write me, by
Speaker 1: the way and say it's not it's a fucking thing.
Speaker 2: So there's no one that's gonna say that's not a thing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's a lot of women who pretend like you
Speaker 1: don't know me and my friends. I think I know
Speaker 1: better than you do.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think you're I'm a woman, and I am
Speaker 3: going to agree with you that women are catty, and
Speaker 3: it's the most catty ones.
Speaker 2: Are the most insecure.
Speaker 1: Though. I think I agree with you. I I people
Speaker 1: say to me all the time, like, you don't know
Speaker 1: the way a woman thinks because you're not a woman.
Speaker 1: I'm like, you only know the way you think, and
Speaker 1: then they go, well, no, I know that. My friends think.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I don't think you do. I don't think
Speaker 1: you do, because when it gets right down to it,
Speaker 1: I'm not sure she's as right or die as you think.
Speaker 1: And I'm not sure you need that either. Like I
Speaker 1: think you should find happiness in yourself, find happiness in
Speaker 1: your relationship, find happiness in your family, and then like
Speaker 1: the next ring out can be your bridesmaids.
Speaker 2: One percent. I don't think any woman is right or die.
Speaker 3: Except for I mean, you made a good point. There
Speaker 3: are some moms out there, you know.
Speaker 2: I'm really close with my kids. We're definitely right or dies.
Speaker 3: But besides that, I wouldn't trust another woman with any anything.
Speaker 1: Did you have weddings I did. Did you have bridesmaids?
Speaker 2: I didn't. I didn't.
Speaker 1: Oh you didn't.
Speaker 2: I have my kids in my wedding.
Speaker 1: We just were not the first one.
Speaker 3: Even the first one we were. We didn't have I mean,
Speaker 3: we didn't have enough money even for a wedding rate.
Speaker 1: Well, because I ask women this, I go and they're like, oh,
Speaker 1: I love my girlfriends or whatever. Like show me your
Speaker 1: wedding photo and tell me how many of those are
Speaker 1: you still friends with. You know, sometimes you're closer to
Speaker 1: your college friends or your sorority sisters because you only
Speaker 1: see them once in a while. You're not kind of
Speaker 1: you moved away, you're not in college anymore. It's a
Speaker 1: little and you have memories of when everything was fine.
Speaker 1: Even though that's sorority scenes about it as a bit
Speaker 1: as they get it's your day to day circle. The
Speaker 1: women on the cul de Sac, the people in that,
Speaker 1: that's the ones you kind of got to watch.
Speaker 2: Oh the cul de Sac.
Speaker 3: I live up in, you know, a little gated community
Speaker 3: in DC Ranch. And there's even there's mean moms in
Speaker 3: the group of I mean, I'm older, you know, I'm
Speaker 3: in my fifties.
Speaker 1: You know this.
Speaker 2: But those moms with.
Speaker 3: Toddlers and young schoolers. Man, they're the head of the
Speaker 3: mean girls.
Speaker 2: They have their little.
Speaker 3: Groups and they exclude I watched they exclude.
Speaker 2: Some of the moms purposely. They're mean little things.
Speaker 1: There's cattiness in the car line. Oh yeah, and the
Speaker 1: car line used to not be a thing. The car
Speaker 1: line is a real thing now. Like nobody takes a
Speaker 1: bus anymore.
Speaker 3: Oh no, nobody takes a bus. I mean, I've got
Speaker 3: four kids. Nobody kids get rides. Why because we're a
Speaker 3: privileged society.
Speaker 1: But is that better? I mean, I think they're like
Speaker 1: the school bus is lord the flies, Like it's better
Speaker 1: societally if the kids ride the bus or walk to
Speaker 1: school or ride their bike. You know, you're old enough
Speaker 1: to ride a bike.
Speaker 3: I think the lack of parenting now you just don't
Speaker 3: know who your kids sitting with.
Speaker 1: You didn't know then, I know.
Speaker 2: But I think the internet has been nothing but shit
Speaker 2: for a.
Speaker 1: Kid because it teaches them to do bad things. And
Speaker 1: what it does a lot of times is you can
Speaker 1: learn on TikTok how to manipulate your parents.
Speaker 2: Well, you remember when we were kids, we were riding
Speaker 2: our bikes all day.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we could just ride a school and we had
Speaker 1: to be home at a certain time. Mom.
Speaker 2: Did you ever see any kids riding bikes anymore?
Speaker 1: No, I don't need to be selling.
Speaker 2: But remember the mongoose, different bikes.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and it's not more dangerous now, there's just more
Speaker 1: sharing of dangerous stories. Now there's more dateline.
Speaker 3: Yeah. And I think that's where you know, the internet
Speaker 3: has helped spawn the mean girl because everybody I follow
Speaker 3: on my Instagram or TikTok, it's beautiful women. It's them buying,
Speaker 3: going on shopping sprees.
Speaker 2: It's shopping. You know, it's all this craziness.
Speaker 3: And it's funny because we were talking about Bethany Frankel
Speaker 3: earlier and she's really on TikTok. I don't know if
Speaker 3: you know that, Like she probably posts ten to day.
Speaker 3: She's got three four million followers whatever. She gets so
Speaker 3: much hate in her comments, and I think to myself,
Speaker 3: she's not doing anything wrong. She's nice in the videos,
Speaker 3: and they just rip her apart, and I'm like, why
Speaker 3: are you watching her?
Speaker 1: You've got to be able to take it, Like, you
Speaker 1: got to be able in the public, like because a
Speaker 1: lot of people who uh are in the public spotlight
Speaker 1: and didn't necessarily grow up that way. You become a
Speaker 1: reality star on the Bachelor you might have or even
Speaker 1: a podcaster. We have a lot of podcasters that roll
Speaker 1: through these studios and they could get one hundred positive
Speaker 1: reviews or comments, and they'll get one comment and they're like,
Speaker 1: I can't do this anymore. It really affects them. And
Speaker 1: that's a little bit human nature. But it's a lot.
Speaker 1: I did a whole show a couple years ago. I
Speaker 1: think it's ready to do this again, where all I
Speaker 1: did was read bad reviews. I fucking loved it, Like
Speaker 1: I don't care.
Speaker 2: I love that.
Speaker 3: So I'm a little dudish though, Yeah, I love it.
Speaker 3: Haters make me I'm like, maybe we want to be
Speaker 3: more successful.
Speaker 1: I'm just like, you're wrong, but I'm glad to hear
Speaker 1: you out. And it's the Great Love Debate. We're not
Speaker 1: supposed to agree here, but a lot of people are
Speaker 1: like one bad review or one A lot of women
Speaker 1: have stopped podcasting because they don't because there's now video involved,
Speaker 1: you know, in the Great Love Debate, find hy They
Speaker 1: don't want to have to compete with that. They don't
Speaker 1: want to have to do that at a lot of
Speaker 1: people loved it wasn't so bad here in Arizona. Were
Speaker 1: you in Arizona during COVID times?
Speaker 3: You were?
Speaker 1: It wasn't so bad here, But in the rest a
Speaker 1: lot of the country people loved the lockdown because it
Speaker 1: was the great equalizer. Nobody was getting too far ahead
Speaker 1: of you, nobody was having too much fun, nobody was
Speaker 1: necessarily dating people. A lot of people wanted that go
Speaker 1: on forever.
Speaker 2: That's true. Yeah, I mean I wasn't one of them,
Speaker 2: but yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I wasn't one of them either, but a lot
Speaker 1: of people were. I could just say, They're like, oh,
Speaker 1: we need to stay down, lock down another couple of
Speaker 1: years because nobody was getting no you were just right
Speaker 1: with everybody else. And that was a sucky, sucky time.
Speaker 2: I hated it. I needed to get out.
Speaker 1: I hated it too. It wasn't terrible here. Schools were
Speaker 1: open here most of the time, right, Yeah.
Speaker 2: I wonder if the click the mean girl stuff was
Speaker 2: worse or better during COVID.
Speaker 1: It was better because people were just kind of fake
Speaker 1: checking in with each other. They were like, yeah, I
Speaker 1: hope you're all doing it. Stay safe.
Speaker 2: And you spent so much time with your family.
Speaker 1: I mean, some people got divorced, you know, because they
Speaker 1: had to spend time with their husbands.
Speaker 2: That's true.
Speaker 1: You know, I'm not sure divorce right, but I'm not sure.
Speaker 1: A lot of women, you know, want to tell their
Speaker 1: advise their friend to get divorced. They're like, oh, you
Speaker 1: can work, because they don't necessarily want them back out
Speaker 1: there if they're stuck in their own miserable marriage. There's
Speaker 1: a lot of that going on, though. It's always the
Speaker 1: first one of the group who gets divorced. The rest
Speaker 1: of the groups like, fuck, she made it over the wall.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I know, you're right. You're right.
Speaker 3: It's really interesting because you everybody has a divorced friend
Speaker 3: is just in a miserable relationship and you all talk
Speaker 3: about her. Yeah, watch the train, the car wreck. Yeah,
Speaker 3: I know, Yeah, it's crazy.
Speaker 2: Women are we're just not nice.
Speaker 1: You're not nice and that's the dairy little say. But
Speaker 1: men are assholes. That's a little bit different than not nice.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I think you're oddly more in touch than
Speaker 2: most women.
Speaker 1: I think you're right. I think I grew up with
Speaker 1: two sisters and I thought that. I'm like, I know
Speaker 1: what the dudes know. If I study the mindset of
Speaker 1: the women, maybe I'll get keys to the kingdom. So
Speaker 1: I know like five percent of what there is to know,
Speaker 1: but I know more than most because I'm curious about it.
Speaker 1: I'm like, you guys are very complicated creatures, and I
Speaker 1: think the girl girl dynamic is just I'm like, can
Speaker 1: we even have this conversation out loud? And you know,
Speaker 1: I've been doing this podcast for eleven years and I
Speaker 1: don't think I've done an episode on this, but I
Speaker 1: always kind of hint at it, like I don't think
Speaker 1: she is your friend. I don't think she is rooting
Speaker 1: for you. I don't think this is what you think
Speaker 1: it is. So you know, if you're one of the
Speaker 1: you know two percent out there, and you have this
Speaker 1: group of friends and you've been together since you were
Speaker 1: three years old and you're all friends. I wonder why
Speaker 1: you don't let any other girls into the group.
Speaker 3: Oh that's the other thing. Yeah, girls do not let
Speaker 3: girls into the group. You know. Moving here from Washington,
Speaker 3: I met I would in every group. I think there's
Speaker 3: one or two nice girls. And I have been involved
Speaker 3: in all the different groups. The married Scottsdale, rich, rich wife,
Speaker 3: and I'll.
Speaker 2: Tell you, man, they were territorial bitches. Would not let
Speaker 2: me in. They were all they were the ones that
Speaker 2: served on the harp ball.
Speaker 1: Yeah there could be a real House West franchise.
Speaker 3: There could, and they a couple of them in the
Speaker 3: group were just so sweet to me. But the rest
Speaker 3: of them, the overly plastic blonde.
Speaker 2: With the big, big lips, she was always the worst
Speaker 2: to me. Or the fatter brunette.
Speaker 3: Man, they made my life hard and I was just like,
Speaker 3: this just isn't even worse. They do not let you in.
Speaker 1: I think there's a bar down the street called the
Speaker 1: Fatter Brunette.
Speaker 2: I love that, one of those. But then I have
Speaker 2: single friends too, and same thing. You know they don't.
Speaker 2: It's hard getting into any female group.
Speaker 3: They're so territorial, and it is I'm more the merrier
Speaker 3: kind of girl.
Speaker 1: You know, ye are you?
Speaker 2: Yeah, for sure.
Speaker 1: You just want a group of.
Speaker 2: Chicks, I mean, chicks, dudes, whatever.
Speaker 1: I mean.
Speaker 2: I think the more friends.
Speaker 1: You because you have because you're big on is TikTok
Speaker 1: your biggest one the socials.
Speaker 3: Yeah, TikTok's and when I do the most, And I
Speaker 3: mean I think I'm what has grown.
Speaker 2: I've grown.
Speaker 3: I'm like fifty five sixty percent men, but I'm almost
Speaker 3: fifty percent women.
Speaker 2: But it took a while to get that.
Speaker 3: I mean when you started with me or oh gosh,
Speaker 3: I was like ninety percent men. Women do not support
Speaker 3: attractive females.
Speaker 2: And I've got a lot of hate from women. I
Speaker 2: still do.
Speaker 3: I still get a lot of hate from women, you know,
Speaker 3: just women saying you're fifty one, what are you doing
Speaker 3: on TikTok?
Speaker 2: You're a loser. I mean, I don't get that from men.
Speaker 1: No, they're grateful that you're there.
Speaker 2: Yeah, They're like, you're so much fun. You're a ray
Speaker 2: of sunshine.
Speaker 3: It's nice just to see what's going on in your life.
Speaker 3: And the women are just who. I get a lot
Speaker 3: of mean comment, not a lot, but I get to.
Speaker 1: Do fair share. For do you get dress your age?
Speaker 2: I do dress my age.
Speaker 1: No, you're pretty good. You know me.
Speaker 3: I'm pretty conservative. But I do get a lot of hate.
Speaker 3: And then when I look at the woman, I'm like,
Speaker 3: I look like you. I wouldn't be on TikTok either.
Speaker 3: See there's the petty side, the bitchy side coming out right,
Speaker 3: but I never get it from.
Speaker 2: You know, well put together women.
Speaker 3: So I would say the meanest woman for me is,
Speaker 3: you know, the heavier one that's super insecure.
Speaker 1: Me and you have something in common. Last year we
Speaker 1: both had cancer battles. I guess we did. You came
Speaker 1: out of it like, you look pretty good. I look
Speaker 1: pretty good, you know. People, I'm like, I didn't have
Speaker 1: face cancer, but it's still bad. A lot of people
Speaker 1: were like, well, you look fine, so you must be fine.
Speaker 1: And so a lot of people dismiss it what it
Speaker 1: is or we have to go through because unless you
Speaker 1: look a certain way, you know, it was really weird.
Speaker 1: I'm like, I didn't have chemo. I didn't. I had surgery,
Speaker 1: but I didn't have it like it wasn't an affect
Speaker 1: my hair. But people are like, well, you don't look sick.
Speaker 1: I'm like, what is that supposed to look like? I
Speaker 1: don't think I want to look sick and people look sick.
Speaker 1: Heart goes out to you or whatever. But I'm like,
Speaker 1: is this how you're judging my What is this how
Speaker 1: you're diagnosing me?
Speaker 2: See, I didn't.
Speaker 3: I was pretty private about my can sir, my cancer.
Speaker 3: I mean I could have died from it for sure.
Speaker 1: It was real cancer.
Speaker 3: It was real cancer, and I had major, major surgery.
Speaker 3: I was in the hospital for seven days, which these days,
Speaker 3: that's a long time.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I was supposed to be in the sevent day.
Speaker 1: I just wouldn't take it.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm like, I was actually supposed to be in longer.
Speaker 3: But I said, look right, well we got in a fight.
Speaker 3: I was like, I need to go. I'm dying in
Speaker 3: this place. But I do think women are different than men.
Speaker 3: I know a lot of women that when they got cancer,
Speaker 3: they broadcasted over all social media channels. It was cancer, cancer, cancer, cancer.
Speaker 3: So it was like a tension mechanism for.
Speaker 2: Him and for me.
Speaker 3: I just didn't want anyone to know guys are different.
Speaker 3: Though it's like, yeah, I've got.
Speaker 1: No I went a long time before I even said
Speaker 1: it on the podcast, and then people treat you differently
Speaker 1: you're a cancer guy, and I didn't like that. I
Speaker 1: was really uncomfortable with that because I could hear the
Speaker 1: whispers and people were like it, see okay, I see okay,
Speaker 1: it looks okay. Is that all right? Like it became
Speaker 1: the defining characteristic of me?
Speaker 2: And I do remember when you were at cancer It's
Speaker 2: like what, yeah, I do? Because did you hear about that?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 1: People, it's all anybody would talk It was like my
Speaker 1: defining characteristic. And it was just kind of like, this
Speaker 1: is why I wouldn't be around a little bit. Yeah
Speaker 1: where I wasn't paying a little grumpy or whatever, but
Speaker 1: it's all anybody talked about. And some of it was
Speaker 1: like fuck him, good. I hope you do.
Speaker 2: You think you got more from the guys the girls were, you.
Speaker 1: Know, I got a few. I don't know. I'm not
Speaker 1: sure everybody's rooting for me, but I did have more
Speaker 1: well wishers than I ever thought was possible. Like I
Speaker 1: couldn't believe.
Speaker 2: How good people great.
Speaker 1: But I don't know about that, but it was humbling,
Speaker 1: but a lot of it was it defined me. My
Speaker 1: health situation was all anybody and even to this day,
Speaker 1: you know I had cancer was in my ribcage. I've
Speaker 1: talked about this before, hugging. When you when you lose
Speaker 1: the ability to hug, Yeah, you don't think about that
Speaker 1: at a time, but when you see somebody and you
Speaker 1: can't really do because it would hurt so bad, it
Speaker 1: really does affect. Then you're not bonding acquaintances, strangers, people
Speaker 1: or whatever, like there's a little bit of a distance.
Speaker 1: And I didn't like the distance. And for somebody who's
Speaker 1: introverted and always likes distance, I was surprised that that
Speaker 1: bothered me.
Speaker 3: That is so I had a different situation because I
Speaker 3: just kept it on the down low because you know,
Speaker 3: I mean, coming from where I came from, I never
Speaker 3: I've just I saw too many women, women that just
Speaker 3: spouted all over social media like every day.
Speaker 2: It was such a downer.
Speaker 3: I never wanted to be a downer because you know,
Speaker 3: as soon as they find out you have cancer.
Speaker 1: Like oh yeah, oh.
Speaker 3: You know, and this was like the whole the whole
Speaker 3: interaction changes, and so I just didn't want that uncomfortableness
Speaker 3: I know, all right. Your yours was tough though, because yours,
Speaker 3: I mean you were down down.
Speaker 1: I'm down for a while, I know, Yet I press on.
Speaker 1: I kept doing, I kept doing the show.
Speaker 2: You look good, bruh, I do.
Speaker 1: I didn't lose my hair, my gray hair. As you said.
Speaker 1: I'm like, my license says brown and you're like, it's
Speaker 1: not fucking brown. Hasn't been brown a long time.
Speaker 2: There's no brown, I think, I think, Grace.
Speaker 1: I know, but you're a little older. Well, well you're
Speaker 1: not twenty four.
Speaker 2: I'm not twenty four anymore.
Speaker 3: But that Richard gear Gray that you're polland I mean
Speaker 3: you're good. You're a good looking guy.
Speaker 2: You know this, Brian, I do.
Speaker 1: My mother told me every day. So there you go.
Speaker 1: All right. Last time you were on the podcast, we
Speaker 1: played something called worst date or first date. You remember
Speaker 1: that I did, and I believe you gave us a
Speaker 1: first date? Was it a worst date? What did you
Speaker 1: give us?
Speaker 2: What did I care?
Speaker 1: I don't remember. You got to do it again because
Speaker 1: I'm willing to bet that you have some shitty dates
Speaker 1: or some good dates. And you I remember after the
Speaker 1: show ended, You're like, oh shit, I had another one.
Speaker 1: I should have told. So you get another crack at
Speaker 1: the apple. Worst date or first date I'll do.
Speaker 2: I remember I did a first date. I remember, and
Speaker 2: it was of course, it.
Speaker 1: Was so freaking it was really over the top.
Speaker 2: It was materialistic.
Speaker 1: Yeah, they took me for Lois Tom.
Speaker 2: I remember that. Probably what about you? You go, first
Speaker 2: worst date?
Speaker 1: Done this show before? This is? Everybody knows my worst date.
Speaker 3: You know. I think I'm thinking of my worst date,
Speaker 3: and I would say my worst date.
Speaker 2: It's so stupid. It's so stupid. But it was when
Speaker 2: I was younger. That's the thing. I've been so blessed.
Speaker 1: I go.
Speaker 3: I'm pretty picky on who I go out with, Brian,
Speaker 3: so most of my dates have been fabulous.
Speaker 2: So I mean, I think I said.
Speaker 1: This, how do you how do you scream them?
Speaker 2: Because I just don't go out the first time they
Speaker 2: asked me. They have to be my friend. I have
Speaker 2: to get to know.
Speaker 3: Them a little.
Speaker 2: Oh really, Oh yeah, I'm not just I am not
Speaker 2: going to be stuck. I learned that early on.
Speaker 3: If you say used to a guy you barely know,
Speaker 3: and you're stuck at a date for two to three hours,
Speaker 3: that is my worst way.
Speaker 1: We used to date that way, I don't. We'd be
Speaker 1: drunk two am, you'd write your number on a napkin.
Speaker 1: We'll call you up, we'd pick you up, we would
Speaker 1: ask you about that was a date.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but you could get stuck.
Speaker 3: I would say, those are my worst dates when I'm
Speaker 3: stuck with some guy.
Speaker 2: Where Like, my worst date is.
Speaker 3: I got stuck with a guy before I started kind
Speaker 3: of monitoring it.
Speaker 2: The whole time we talk about his ex wife.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's like the whole time. It shows he's still
Speaker 1: not over her and angry with her.
Speaker 3: You should never talk about You should do a you
Speaker 3: should do a whole podcast on things to do and
Speaker 3: not do on a date, because you should never talk
Speaker 3: about your X on the first day.
Speaker 2: Shouldn't even come off.
Speaker 1: Here's the question I ask though about if somebody tells
Speaker 1: me they're divorced. I don't say why'd you get divorced?
Speaker 1: I said, when did you know it wasn't gonna last forever? Well,
Speaker 1: and I'm shocked at how often it's when he asked
Speaker 1: the wedding night, that's crazy, And I'm like, how long
Speaker 1: you're married? Seventeen years? Well, you knew on the wedding
Speaker 1: night it was gonna last forever.
Speaker 3: I thought I wouldn't date that person. I wouldn't if
Speaker 3: any knew on the wedding night wasn't gonna happen. I
Speaker 3: have no respect for you.
Speaker 1: I know, but it's tough to pull. I told you.
Speaker 1: We're starting a podcast called cold Feet, and it's about
Speaker 1: women who call off, not call off engagements, call off
Speaker 1: with wedding.
Speaker 2: I love that.
Speaker 1: It's really hard to do. Once everybody's been inviting the
Speaker 1: deposits down, it's really hard to do. So that's a
Speaker 1: little bit easier to say. And a lot of people
Speaker 1: are like, maybe it'll get better and I'll spend two years,
Speaker 1: and then you have a kid and you're like, well,
Speaker 1: le's see, and then you're stuck till the kid graduates
Speaker 1: high school. You know.
Speaker 2: But gosh, if you know on the wedding night, I
Speaker 2: don't know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's brutal. It's got to be the worst night
Speaker 1: of your life.
Speaker 2: But you spent seventeen years with them.
Speaker 1: I mean, but a lot of times for the woman,
Speaker 1: the wedding night is the destination. And to be fair
Speaker 1: to the men, you know, the women's like I want
Speaker 1: the house, the dog, the white pick offense he's not
Speaker 1: even on that list. Yeah, that's true for him. He
Speaker 1: asks you to marry him because he thinks you're gonna
Speaker 1: he's gonna spend the rest of his life with you.
Speaker 1: The women a lot of times are like, he'll be
Speaker 1: a good father. He checks a lot of boxes. It's
Speaker 1: a little less romantic than you think. All right, this
Speaker 1: was great. Tell everybody how they can find you and
Speaker 1: how to be better girlfriends.
Speaker 3: I am mom at Unapologetic Crystal on TikTok.
Speaker 2: I do have a bunch of fake accounts.
Speaker 3: On there, but I'm Burners Burners and they're connect they're
Speaker 3: contacting people, so ignore those and then hopefully I'm gonna
Speaker 3: have Unapologetic Me podcast here coming up soon.
Speaker 1: There you go. Thank you. This was good as far
Speaker 1: as us like, share, follow, Please review this podcast after
Speaker 1: five hundred and god knows how many episodes, your reviews
Speaker 1: still mean a lot in the podcasting ecosystem. Shoot me
Speaker 1: an email Great Love Debate at gmail dot com. If
Speaker 1: you've got questions, thoughts, complaints, or you're gonna say my
Speaker 1: friends are the best. I don't believe you, but send
Speaker 1: it anyway. Go to Great Lovedebate dot com. I know
Speaker 1: I've been sort of circling the drain on this. I
Speaker 1: do feel better. I feel better. At the very least,
Speaker 1: we are doing the Great Love to Boat. We are
Speaker 1: finally doing the cruise for you people, the dating highjinks
Speaker 1: on the high Seas. We're gonna do live show on
Speaker 1: a boat. Details coming. It's leaving from Florida, so you'll
Speaker 1: have to get your ass to Florida. I may do
Speaker 1: some other shows I get asked. We'll see write a
Speaker 1: bigger check, and I'll do a bigger show because, as
Speaker 1: always at the Great Love Debate, we never stop making love.
Speaker 1: See you next time. The Great Love Debate. It's the
Speaker 1: Great Love Debate
Speaker 2: The Great Love Debate, It's the Great Love to be