Speaker 1: Welcome to the two seventeen Recovery Broadcast. If you don't
Speaker 1: make mistakes, you won't learn. With your host, Corey Winfield,
Speaker 1: you know how you know fish as bad if you
Speaker 1: can't put it on pizza and special guests Justin.
Speaker 2: Burke, the thumb nail totally does not dictate the move
Speaker 2: at all.
Speaker 1: Corey Smokers.
Speaker 3: Maybe one day I can make it onto the TV.
Speaker 1: I'll count and Mitchell O'Brien he goes, you recorded me
Speaker 1: a little sleep it and I was like nope. He goes,
Speaker 1: Winfield dead. I got this harror in his eyes and
Speaker 1: I was like nope, and then he's like it was Smoker,
Speaker 1: got yours. It is the second of December twenty twenty
Speaker 1: four of My name is Corey Winfield, I'm Justin Burke,
Speaker 1: I'm Mitchell.
Speaker 3: O'Brien and I'm Corey Smoker. What up?
Speaker 1: That's up? The first time we've done a podcast together,
Speaker 1: and I don't know since summer probably yeah, the fishing
Speaker 1: event of moon Bro. So it's been forever. It's been
Speaker 1: forrever Sins. I've done a podcast in general. Yes, Marnie
Speaker 1: over the weekend was like, let's do a podcast. I
Speaker 1: says sure we didn't. You got a little one.
Speaker 2: Man.
Speaker 1: It's it's tough because like she's on this Betty Crocker
Speaker 1: thing where she wants to be Betty Crocker. She wants
Speaker 1: to be Marnie Winfield aka Betty Crocker or the other
Speaker 1: lady who went to jail Snoop Dogg's friend, Martha Stewart. Yeah,
Speaker 1: she wants to be like her, but better. She's called
Speaker 1: her age Bima. Oh, I don't think we're gonna do that, Mitchell.
Speaker 1: That's insensitive nowadays. Yeah. You know, if you're talking to
Speaker 1: me in my radio show back in twenty twenty or
Speaker 1: twenty four oh four, I guess that's a better way
Speaker 1: to say that. Then, Yes, I would have been all
Speaker 1: over that. But I'm a changed man. I have a son.
Speaker 3: Now, iust tell your wife keep on going. She I
Speaker 3: think she's better than all of them.
Speaker 1: Yeah, she's she's really good at it. And so when
Speaker 1: she gets free time, like when Parker is on me sleeping,
Speaker 1: she's like, Okay, she goes in there and starts cooking stuff,
Speaker 1: like she made breakfast sandwiches. I don't know why I
Speaker 1: didn't get one this morning? What, Yeah, you didn't get one. No,
Speaker 1: last night, it was good and she's like, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: freeze them and put them in this and them okay,
Speaker 1: so yeah, and then when I get my free time, poop.
Speaker 1: I don't. I don't know what I do in my
Speaker 1: free time at home, nap.
Speaker 3: Make fit, put videos together at it. I would create some.
Speaker 1: Stuff I want to do, but I don't do at home.
Speaker 1: Build shelves. No, that's that's me watching Parker. Oh yeah,
Speaker 1: got a whole new room downstairs thanks to my wife,
Speaker 1: which is cool. But now we had the holiday, and
Speaker 1: I was gonna do a podcast before the holiday talking
Speaker 1: about how it's so tough for people who use and
Speaker 1: blah blah blah, but every day is tough. Like if
Speaker 1: you are looking for an excuse, it's snowing right now.
Speaker 1: I used to love get drunken look at the snow
Speaker 1: or whatever. Apparently I like driving in it too, because
Speaker 1: that's when I got me DUI actually, six years ago
Speaker 1: to this day, I was in jail for this and
Speaker 1: I think I just saw it was snowing and rory,
Speaker 1: I don't know, it was blacked out. It was crazy,
Speaker 1: and that's the scary part of it that woke me up.
Speaker 1: To realize this isn't a game anymore and you're driving
Speaker 1: a vehicle and you don't remember it. Yeah right, I'm
Speaker 1: glad I don't have any STDs. It's tis looked out
Speaker 1: on that one. But I'm just saying excuses are everywhere.
Speaker 1: So if you want to look at it, like, oh,
Speaker 1: it's the holiday, and I used to, you know, get
Speaker 1: really depressed and the holiday when I was drinking, because
Speaker 1: it's a depressant. Alcohol does that. So I don't know
Speaker 1: what was your guys' holiday, Like, was it pretty good?
Speaker 1: You talked to your brother in jail you said that
Speaker 1: was good? Or Ever since I was a.
Speaker 4: Kid, Thanksgiving has had this supernatural negativity to it, and
Speaker 4: there was never really anything that happened on Thanksgiving because
Speaker 4: if somebody was sick, somebody was angry, there was an
Speaker 4: argument happening, something would happen.
Speaker 1: And this year was no different.
Speaker 4: I ran away from it, went and did my own
Speaker 4: thing with my own kid and friends, and like had
Speaker 4: her own little family thing. But all the chaos still
Speaker 4: happened in my family. So, yeah, we had a fight
Speaker 4: in the family that landed my brother in jail.
Speaker 1: Oh yep. We had.
Speaker 4: My father and his Shenanigans, drunk dialing people obviously yep.
Speaker 4: And then the incident that I'm just gonna call the
Speaker 4: Brown Fridays Sale.
Speaker 1: I don't even have a drop for that.
Speaker 4: I don't even know a Brown Friday sale, the Brown
Speaker 4: Friday sale, So there was a that's a good one
Speaker 4: for it. All I can say is that I'm glad
Speaker 4: that new Dad Jerry was there.
Speaker 1: Oh I don't know, not for that either, what no way.
Speaker 4: He's a repair man wizard and was able to fix
Speaker 4: the burst pipe in the basement where the Brown Friday
Speaker 4: sale happened.
Speaker 1: And then they were able to clean it up. But
Speaker 1: I was that was the part of.
Speaker 4: The family that I kind of would have wanted to
Speaker 4: be around, But then was then glad that I wasn't
Speaker 4: because of that because they spent like four hours cleaning
Speaker 4: that up on Black Friday.
Speaker 1: Damn. That's why I call it the Brown Fridays. Wow,
Speaker 1: that's a pretty crappy thing to happen.
Speaker 2: Well, at least they were able to fix the pipes
Speaker 2: cheap with it being Black Friday.
Speaker 1: Huh time they got to sail on parts maybe yeah,
Speaker 1: So I don't know, but it just always is something
Speaker 1: always on Thanksgiving, and I got to excuse my sell
Speaker 1: from it this year. But it's like still happening and
Speaker 1: all that. It's good they didn't You didn't drink or anything.
Speaker 1: You didn't use drugs or nothing. So you handled it
Speaker 1: like an adult, and you chose not to be a
Speaker 1: part of what you didn't want to be a part of.
Speaker 1: And that is sometimes is hard for us. I'm supposed
Speaker 1: to be there. I'm glad, da da da, you know.
Speaker 1: And like if I go downstate to see my parents,
Speaker 1: you know, if my mom's tripping or something, I have
Speaker 1: to remove myself from that situation, you know. And and
Speaker 1: I am deep in my sobriety now where I can
Speaker 1: I can do that. Well, same thing with my you know,
Speaker 1: my dad or brother, whoever, you know, whoever wants to
Speaker 1: throw me off my game. I have the choice to
Speaker 1: either feed into that or go no, no, this isn't my problem,
Speaker 1: this isn't my thing. I'm not even in it is.
Speaker 1: I'm out see you, you know, and then we preserve
Speaker 1: our sobriety, right, That's the way I look at it.
Speaker 1: That's what I did this year. So good for you.
Speaker 4: It's actually a really big part of my recovery story.
Speaker 4: The first two holiday seasons of my recovery, I chose
Speaker 4: to stay away from family. I had some very supportive
Speaker 4: family members that were in support of my recovery, but
Speaker 4: I also had some very toxic family members that were
Speaker 4: very critical and in substance use disorder themselves, So my
Speaker 4: mental health was really bad back then. I decided that
Speaker 4: I had to stay away, and people were very critical
Speaker 4: of that. Some of them were supportive, but I look
Speaker 4: back and I don't I wouldn't do it any other way.
Speaker 4: And like you said, like it's different now, but it's
Speaker 4: a holiday. I can choose to have a good time,
Speaker 4: and there are some people in my family that don't
Speaker 4: seem to have that ability. So I'm making decisions with
Speaker 4: my son to go and have a good holiday. And yeah,
Speaker 4: so good for you man. Pivot, good pivot, But you ja.
Speaker 2: Dog Mine was great. I couldn't asked for a better holiday. Yeah, yeah,
Speaker 2: really it really was. I went to my old roommate's
Speaker 2: mom's house for Thanksgiving with his family. I can't hear
Speaker 2: the drops, so I don't have had phones like but anyways, yeah,
Speaker 2: we went to his mom's house. We watched Lions game,
Speaker 2: had a nice little meal. It was nice. I'm known
Speaker 2: her for a couple of years now. His family like
Speaker 2: to meet his sister and her husband, and they invited
Speaker 2: us out to go like fishing for charter fishing for
Speaker 2: walleye down by Detroit. I don't like heron and stuff,
Speaker 2: and then went back to his house. He caught a flight.
Speaker 2: I gave someone a ride on Friday that was getting
Speaker 2: out of jail, So that felt very good. I'm kind
Speaker 2: of rewarding to be able to help someone out during
Speaker 2: the holiday weekend because most places ain't open like that.
Speaker 1: So and they're not going to release them to just anybody.
Speaker 1: Sometimes they're going to treatment. They went to treatment, so
Speaker 1: it's like, yeah, no one else is picking his ass
Speaker 1: up on Black Friday, So yeah, exactly, And then that's
Speaker 1: why we do what we do. But that's good that,
Speaker 1: you know, because you didn't have to do that.
Speaker 2: No, I mean, I could have took my four day weekend,
Speaker 2: but you know, I mean to give back to people
Speaker 2: that's trying to get into the program.
Speaker 1: Feels very rewarding.
Speaker 2: To have that conversation with those people because I know
Speaker 2: what it was like when I got released from jail
Speaker 2: to go to treatment the nerves and everything else. And
Speaker 2: I didn't have that someone that had already gone through treatment,
Speaker 2: that just that just got out of jail to go
Speaker 2: to treatment. Like, I didn't have that person to talk
Speaker 2: to on the way up. I had my mom and
Speaker 2: my brother, but I mean they were supportive, but at
Speaker 2: the same time, they didn't know what to expect, you know.
Speaker 1: Near did.
Speaker 2: My brother went, but I mean he fell right back
Speaker 2: off the wagon soon as he got home, you know,
Speaker 2: so he didn't really know what to expect. And they're
Speaker 2: all kind of different. And then my son came up
Speaker 2: Friday night, was able, went and got everything to do
Speaker 2: with Thanksgiving dinner at my house and ended up hanging
Speaker 2: out with him cooking turkey and stuff on Saturday. Then
Speaker 2: when my daughter came back up, she helped me clean
Speaker 2: up the mess and just kind of chilled up a
Speaker 2: little bit Sunday night. So it's kind of peaceful, fills
Speaker 2: with entertainment. My son's a trip to be around.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Yeah, that's awesome. You guys have that relationship back. Yeah,
Speaker 1: but you smoke her. Did you hang out with your daughter?
Speaker 3: I did get to see my daughter for a little bit, yeah,
Speaker 3: kind of a holiday.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you don't want to talk about it, that's cool.
Speaker 3: I just experienced a loss, and then it was also
Speaker 3: too just kind of more eye opening on this illusion
Speaker 3: that I see my family or that expectations that I
Speaker 3: had maybe just naturally put on my family. And then
Speaker 3: it was also then I went down the list of
Speaker 3: like feeling entitlement and so just I have to be
Speaker 3: religion of that in what I see and how I'm
Speaker 3: processing that, and just remember that, you know it. The
Speaker 3: biggest thing is is that I got to remember two
Speaker 3: things like I can't use over this, and that I
Speaker 3: also like my behaviors, because then I go into really
Speaker 3: anger and then I want to go and act a fool.
Speaker 3: And my husband said he wouldn't bail me out of jail,
Speaker 3: that he would leave me to cool down, and so
Speaker 3: I just kinda I stayed real neutral, and because like
Speaker 3: of my attitude and where I was kind of feeling,
Speaker 3: I really just stayed home.
Speaker 1: It's chilling, and death is a tough one man. People
Speaker 1: act weird, and it's it's weird because you can't really
Speaker 1: tell someone how to act or how to grieve, and
Speaker 1: they grieve differently. Some people are angry at it. Some
Speaker 1: people don't want to deal with it, and they're putting
Speaker 1: situations where they have to, and I know, like, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's just tough, man.
Speaker 3: I did have a good Thanksgiving meal though, that's good.
Speaker 1: That's good. I had a guy reached out to me
Speaker 1: over the weekend too, and he's afraid to go to treatment.
Speaker 1: And it took me back to a day where before
Speaker 1: I went anywhere, like does this person tell me that
Speaker 1: I had to go or that I should go to
Speaker 1: this place in Grand Rapids called Pine Rest And it
Speaker 1: was like not really a treatment center, but it was like.
Speaker 2: A cold occurring place, isn't it.
Speaker 1: Yeah, or mental health and that that really scared me.
Speaker 1: Going to California for the first time. I was just like,
Speaker 1: where am I going whatever? You know, it didn't I
Speaker 1: don't know. Maybe I was a little afraid, I guess,
Speaker 1: but not really, not like it was when the mental
Speaker 1: health one, when I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm going
Speaker 1: into a place and there could be people like talking
Speaker 1: to walls, and there was some of that, but it
Speaker 1: was it was still pretty cool, like there was still
Speaker 1: cool people in there, and you know, a lot of
Speaker 1: people in there for depression. That's what I was going
Speaker 1: there for so it was it was a good thing,
Speaker 1: but I remember being really nervous and being hesitant, like
Speaker 1: I don't want to go there, like I don't don't
Speaker 1: think so, And especially since how I left California, is
Speaker 1: this dude who definitely needed to be somewhere because it
Speaker 1: was this puppy and yeah, and he's like no, he's
Speaker 1: trying to blame in his girl friend. And I'm like,
Speaker 1: you're mad at her because she called the police. That's
Speaker 1: what she's supposed to do, right, And you can't you
Speaker 1: can't hear that, you know. So I'm like, I'm out
Speaker 1: of here. That dude lives above me in this duplex
Speaker 1: that's too close. I'm out. I can't nope, nope, I
Speaker 1: just I got a drinking problem. You guys got other
Speaker 1: kind of issues. I'm out. I can't stay here with
Speaker 1: that dude. So I left, so thinking like, now I'm
Speaker 1: going to a place where there's gonna be a hundred
Speaker 1: of these guys, you know, like what's going on, which
Speaker 1: it wasn't the case, but they go to actual treatment center.
Speaker 1: And if someone's afraid to do that, I could kind
Speaker 1: of see, I guess. But at the end of the day.
Speaker 1: The whole addiction thing, A lot of it is about control,
Speaker 1: and we want to do what we want to do.
Speaker 1: We want to go where we want to go, we
Speaker 1: want to see who we want to see. We're going
Speaker 1: to buy what we want to buy because that keeps
Speaker 1: us going. And most of it's our addiction and fuel
Speaker 1: by our addiction. So part of that is I'm not
Speaker 1: gonna be able to drink. I'm not gonna know anyone.
Speaker 1: I'm not gonna have any money, I'm not gonna drink.
Speaker 1: I can't smoke we I can't do this. I can
Speaker 1: not gonna know anybody. I can't smoke weed, can't drink,
Speaker 1: can't use anything. I'm not gonna know anybody. Nobody's gonna
Speaker 1: bring me home. It's way four hours up north. What
Speaker 1: am I gonna do? Oh my god, I can't drink,
Speaker 1: you can't smoke weed, You don't know anybody that's gonna
Speaker 1: bring me back here, don't have any money. And I
Speaker 1: think a lot of that is that you know, because
Speaker 1: if you think, oh, I'm gonna go in, there's gonna
Speaker 1: be some bad people in there. Now, you got sure
Speaker 1: there's bad people at the store right now that you
Speaker 1: pass every single day in your job, on your way
Speaker 1: to work, whatever. There's bad people everywhere, but majority of
Speaker 1: the people in treatment centers are good people. And I
Speaker 1: told them that. I was like, you're gonna meet some
Speaker 1: really cool people from all different walks of life and
Speaker 1: from different parts of the state, and you're gonna you're
Speaker 1: gonna hear their story and you're gonna go that sounds
Speaker 1: just like mine, and you're gonna you're gonna be able
Speaker 1: to relate to those people, and you're gonna not feel
Speaker 1: so alone. So I don't know what it's gonna happen
Speaker 1: of this, but I just kind of said, look to
Speaker 1: the person that was asking me, Hey, will you help him,
Speaker 1: I was like, yeah, sure, but the only thing I
Speaker 1: can do to help him is I can point them
Speaker 1: where to go, set them up. Hey, get on Medicaid,
Speaker 1: call this, do that, call these people, don't call those people.
Speaker 1: You know kind of thing. He's got to want it,
Speaker 1: he's got to want to go somewhere, and that fear, sure,
Speaker 1: it's there, but you got to overcome that, and you
Speaker 1: got to want that change more than that fear is
Speaker 1: making you not want to go. And if he truly
Speaker 1: wants that change and maybe he's not there yet. This
Speaker 1: guy just had this first awakening, I guess you could say.
Speaker 1: And I had my first awakening. I was the hospital
Speaker 1: and I still came out three months later like I
Speaker 1: can drink again, you know, like I wasn't prepared. I
Speaker 1: wasn't ready. No one told me about addiction. They told
Speaker 1: me I was an alcoholic. Yeah.
Speaker 3: I always asked him too, like what it okay? I
Speaker 3: know you're you're feeling scared of the on and on
Speaker 3: of going to treatment. Bo I mean, what do you
Speaker 3: really have to lose if you go? Yeah, try it out?
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, And maybe I gave him bad advice at
Speaker 1: this point of it, and I'll throw it out there
Speaker 1: to you guys. But he's like, well, I make too
Speaker 1: much in my job to get out of Medicaid. So
Speaker 1: where's your job, he told me. And I was like, okay,
Speaker 1: we'll quit, you know, like these hospital bills are gonna
Speaker 1: add up, and that's gonna make you drink too, you know,
Speaker 1: like like seriously, and this is a job. You could
Speaker 1: probably get back or find a better one somewhere else.
Speaker 1: That's very, very similar. Yep.
Speaker 4: You hear that a lot, though. You know, I can't
Speaker 4: go treatment because of my job. I can't go to
Speaker 4: the treatment because my dog. Yeah, but my dog, yeah.
Speaker 4: All the dogs are a good one too. I had
Speaker 4: a guy he's probably dead now. I haven't heard from
Speaker 4: a long ass time, so he probably is dead, and
Speaker 4: that's what happens.
Speaker 1: But I was like, dude, he was leaving treatment is
Speaker 1: when I was working at Addiction Treatment Services, And I
Speaker 1: was like, she really think about sober living man, because
Speaker 1: you know, I know the situation going to it's empty house,
Speaker 1: my dog, Like, so we're living. Oh, I can't leave
Speaker 1: my dog. Well, you're gonna die if you don't leave
Speaker 1: your dog. My dog's been at my mom's. Well, let
Speaker 1: the dogs stay at your mom's house for another ninety days, man,
Speaker 1: Like do some sober living, Like hit the ground running
Speaker 1: with this sobiety thing, man, change your life.
Speaker 2: But it also plays into the fact, you know, if
Speaker 2: you can't take care of yourself, are you going to
Speaker 2: take care.
Speaker 1: Of that dog?
Speaker 2: You know, if all you're worried about drinking, you're not
Speaker 2: gonna go buy dog food because you're gonna go to
Speaker 2: the liquor store to go get more alcohol or dope.
Speaker 2: You know, it doesn't matter what your vice is in life,
Speaker 2: your vice is gonna come first before dog food. And
Speaker 2: it's like these people just don't understand that, you know,
Speaker 2: And it's just like, dude.
Speaker 1: You got to do this.
Speaker 2: Otherwise your dog's not gonna be there to even be
Speaker 2: with you. It's gonna run away to go find food.
Speaker 1: But then you can always ask mom or cousin or brother, whoever,
Speaker 1: can you give me twenty bucks? Leeword doesn't have any food, okay?
Speaker 1: And then you're buying the cheap ass ninety nine percent
Speaker 1: food and get yourself a fifth and you're on the way.
Speaker 1: It could be another excuse. I don't know, but it
Speaker 1: doesn't make It doesn't make sense. And there are people
Speaker 1: that will take your dog or watch your dog or whatever,
Speaker 1: you know, and if not, I don't not say it.
Speaker 1: But there's apps out there too. The neighborhood or something
Speaker 1: I don't remember. I told her neighbor about it. She
Speaker 1: was like, coming over here, being loud. Have you met
Speaker 1: the neighbor here over here? Briefly, it's loud. I don't
Speaker 1: remember her name, but she came up. She was loud.
Speaker 1: I was like, what is going on in the lobby.
Speaker 1: I think it starts with an her and Corey know
Speaker 1: each other really very smoker. Yeah, because are buddies right
Speaker 1: for black in the day. She's loud. Do you ever
Speaker 1: tell her like hey, inside voice, Yeah, you do what.
Speaker 1: I know?
Speaker 3: Her name just read at the.
Speaker 1: Well we put her on blast. It rhymes with my name.
Speaker 1: I thought it was Michelle. Yeah, she loud, but she
Speaker 1: came in here one day and she was talking about
Speaker 1: this dog she's trying to get rid of or something.
Speaker 1: Somebody was here with me, justin and I was like,
Speaker 1: I remember, don't go on this app. It's neighborhood or
Speaker 1: the hood or I don't know, some app where you
Speaker 1: can post stuff on there, and people like in my
Speaker 1: neighborhood are always like, oh, could someone shovel my driveway?
Speaker 1: I need some snow tires now, or we're collecting cans
Speaker 1: to save kids, or I don't know something that's always like, well, sorry,
Speaker 1: I found Bob the painter. Nice. But there are things
Speaker 1: down there you could put like, hey, I can't afford
Speaker 1: this dog, can't take care of this dog. Does anybody
Speaker 1: want it? They can get the word out. There's ways
Speaker 1: you can do it. But again, if that's your excuse
Speaker 1: and you're holding on to it. My cat had to
Speaker 1: stay in a room by herself for nine months until
Speaker 1: I could get her back, and I well for Christmas.
Speaker 1: One time, Mom was like, you're not gonna go see
Speaker 1: your cat. I said no. I was like, that will
Speaker 1: scar me and it'll scar her. She can already hear
Speaker 1: my voice down here, but I don't want to see
Speaker 1: her because it was it was tough for me to
Speaker 1: do that, but I had to do that. I had
Speaker 1: to save my life and I gave Nico what six
Speaker 1: more good years sober. Yeah, you know, and she would
Speaker 1: trade that. She would she would be like may she
Speaker 1: would take it that, that's how she says that. But
Speaker 1: she would be like, thank you, I'm glad I got
Speaker 1: to die. See in my homeboy, Corey Sober. I think
Speaker 1: she called me daddy though, but not in a sexual way.
Speaker 3: I believe that. And I always tell the people too, like, Okay,
Speaker 3: you're you don't want to go because of your dog,
Speaker 3: your kid's your job. But you continue to stay out
Speaker 3: here drinking, you're going to lose all that anyways.
Speaker 1: Yep, yep. But she you're that one who figured it out.
Speaker 1: He didn't. It's not you. You haven't figured it out.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I haven't quite figured it out yet, So I
Speaker 2: mean every day is a battle. I mean, it just
Speaker 2: takes one poor decision, you know.
Speaker 1: But I mean that person though, that's like and MITCHI
Speaker 1: probably were the same way. Corey probably the same way too. No,
Speaker 1: I'll just drink on the weekend, like you start thinking
Speaker 1: of these plans of No, I'll just do this and
Speaker 1: i'll do this like you like it's gonna work, because
Speaker 1: I'm gonna make it work and I'll know when to
Speaker 1: stop and I'll just drink that one day. Yep, doesn't work,
Speaker 1: you can ever do it. I'm different. Okay.
Speaker 4: When I first got my job at the hospital, I
Speaker 4: stayed sober for four months, five months, and it's when
Speaker 4: my health was starting to get bad. But then and
Speaker 4: I lost the job. But then I found work in
Speaker 4: a temporary position at the hospital and it helped my
Speaker 4: health in my walking and stuff like that, and I
Speaker 4: stayed sober. And then that position was no longer needed
Speaker 4: because it was only during some construction. Yeah, So then
Speaker 4: I transferred to my other job and it department, and
Speaker 4: I liked it at first, and eventually I absolutely hated it.
Speaker 4: And then that's when, okay, I can do this on
Speaker 4: the weekends. Oh yeah, and then just like back into it.
Speaker 4: And then that was my final downfall before eventually getting sober.
Speaker 1: He lost that job, stopped showing up. Yeah, yeah, sick,
Speaker 1: you know, oh snowday from my kid. Oh my kids
Speaker 1: sick and use all your your sick time and vacation
Speaker 1: time on yep, yep. Then it was like, Mitch, you're
Speaker 1: coming to work. That was funny.
Speaker 4: That was during COVID the early parts twenty twenty. I
Speaker 4: lost my job in August and I called him because there.
Speaker 1: Was like we'll call uneployment.
Speaker 4: I was like, oh, I didn't lose my job because
Speaker 4: of COVID, Like you know, I was laid off at
Speaker 4: one time because of COVID and then brought back and
Speaker 4: then that's when things got really bad. And then I
Speaker 4: got fired for you know, being a shitty employee. Yeah,
Speaker 4: you know, being drunk. So the uh yeah, So finally
Speaker 4: I'm just like whatever, and I called them and it
Speaker 4: took forever to get hold of them, like days sitting
Speaker 4: on holding stuff like that. But then you know, you're
Speaker 4: talking to somebody and it's like, Okay, I lost my
Speaker 4: job and they're like, you lost your job because of COVID,
Speaker 4: and I was like, no, I lost my job during COVID,
Speaker 4: not because of COVID. They're like, so, you lost your
Speaker 4: job because of COVID.
Speaker 1: I was like no.
Speaker 4: I Like we went like round in circles like three
Speaker 4: or four times, and then finally they're like I'm just
Speaker 4: like whatever, man, and then starts sending me money.
Speaker 1: And that was the worst thing. Possibly. Yeah. Yeah. I
Speaker 1: always said, man, if I was getting that money like
Speaker 1: that and I was drinking still, I would be dead
Speaker 1: August January like avoid everybody, Okay what I wanted, Okay,
Speaker 1: perfect and I don't have to talk to nobody. Can
Speaker 1: wear this mask too. Oh this is perfect. Yeah, that
Speaker 1: would have been the end of Corey Windfield. That would
Speaker 1: have died. So God pulled me out of that just
Speaker 1: in time. Got real close.
Speaker 2: I remember when I was in rehab, people are like,
Speaker 2: you're getting filed from an employment yet I'm like unemployment
Speaker 2: for what They're just giving away money and I'm like, no,
Speaker 2: not doing that trick because they're not coming back after
Speaker 2: me because I haven't worked a job in like two years.
Speaker 2: You know, being self employed, you can't get no money
Speaker 2: out of being self employed.
Speaker 1: Obviously, well, I mean you can. I don't think they
Speaker 1: came back after anybody for the Trump one, the Trump money,
Speaker 1: because you're getting going to give us money again? Justin
Speaker 1: probably not. I didn't vote for him, so whatever, Ah
Speaker 1: got your ass Green Party. Don't vote for the Rock.
Speaker 1: You smell what the United States is cooking. I want
Speaker 1: to say, just come on, man, if we can get
Speaker 1: him in the office, like, that's all I want think. Well,
Speaker 1: mean Jesse Ventura, Yeah, Arnold Schwarzenegger, Nah, I don't know,
Speaker 1: can't because he's not from America. Yeah, but I mean
Speaker 1: he became a governor and can't be president. But the
Speaker 1: Rock can. I wrote your name in Oh thank you.
Speaker 1: I was wondering who voted for me. I was looking
Speaker 1: at the results. Hell yeah, it's gonna be a Parker's name,
Speaker 1: Murnie Nick's that can you imagine? Hey, do you bring
Speaker 1: the president today? Well that'd be so awesome. Yeah, the
Speaker 1: President's coming? What who? What would be freaking everybody out?
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, Parker. Well, at least you to name them
Speaker 1: like Northwest or something. Yeah, Cherry Bottom. There's some weird
Speaker 1: celebrity names out there. But back to the job thing though,
Speaker 1: And I think I've talked about this. I would be
Speaker 1: surprised I didn't. But one of the last times I
Speaker 1: lost the job, and it's a job I didn't want.
Speaker 1: And this is the thing. Man, If you are in recovery,
Speaker 1: early recovery and you just go, I'm gonna get a job,
Speaker 1: pay these bills and I'll be happy, No, you won't.
Speaker 1: It's not about the money, and the more money you have,
Speaker 1: the more you're going to spend on your drug choice.
Speaker 1: So think wisely when you go get that job and
Speaker 1: think is this something that I can live with? Is
Speaker 1: it working at the movie theater or something I just
Speaker 1: show up and run a movie. I don't have to
Speaker 1: run the place. I just show up, do little, and
Speaker 1: go home, get paid. Do good. If you can be
Speaker 1: good with that as you're working on your goal, do it.
Speaker 1: But to go out and get this job, to do
Speaker 1: this and do that, just make some money. Now, if
Speaker 1: you're a tooling die maker, you're making dies and trim
Speaker 1: dies and molds and stuff, you probably want to keep
Speaker 1: doing that. But at the same time, like figure out
Speaker 1: what you need to do. But if you're in this
Speaker 1: cycle that we're in, you know, I took this job
Speaker 1: answering phones at the newspaper, yelled at a bunch because
Speaker 1: these so I can't find my papers, like did you
Speaker 1: look in the box, God, dang, oh there it is, dude,
Speaker 1: stop throwing my paper in the bushes. I'm not throwing
Speaker 1: your paper anywhere, lady like yelling at me like I
Speaker 1: did it. And so my answer is sometimes when the
Speaker 1: company then like and I was getting nine bucks an hour,
Speaker 1: nine twenty five. Maybe I can't remember. It was something
Speaker 1: I was just like I used a program or radio
Speaker 1: station and here I am answering the phones. The old
Speaker 1: people can't find the newspaper like it was. It was
Speaker 1: to me degrading almost, you know, like what am I
Speaker 1: doing with my life? And yeah, I was going back
Speaker 1: to school, but for what I don't know. It was stupid,
Speaker 1: and I started on my vendor like I thought I
Speaker 1: was good. I even told the dude in an interview,
Speaker 1: I'm in recovery. Things are good, blah blah blah. I
Speaker 1: don't think I told him I was in recovery. I
Speaker 1: wasn't using that term yet. I told him I was
Speaker 1: an alcoholic, but you know, I have thirty days sober,
Speaker 1: and you know, he's like, oh, I know somebody, because
Speaker 1: of course you do. Everybody knows somebody. And when I
Speaker 1: fell off, man like it fell off, it was probably
Speaker 1: just a hey, I'm gonna drink this weekend. And I
Speaker 1: just remember waking up going shit, what day is it?
Speaker 1: And I called him and I was like, hey, do
Speaker 1: I still have my job? The guy's like, of course
Speaker 1: you don't have your job this Thursday. It was Monday, Tuesday, Wednesdays,
Speaker 1: three days, no call, no show. You're no, you don't
Speaker 1: work here anymore. I said, oh, so I can't just
Speaker 1: come in for the like the rest of the week.
Speaker 1: And he's like, no, you don't work here, okay, get
Speaker 1: on this ship. Then I lost my stars because like
Speaker 1: the people who did ship man like, if you call
Speaker 1: them to say, hey, my eggs are broken, okay, and
Speaker 1: then they ding the driver and then they get their
Speaker 1: ship for free. So like places I was delivering to,
Speaker 1: not talking bad about trailer parks, I'm just saying there
Speaker 1: was always something wrong with the shit. I'm like, I
Speaker 1: brought you exactly what you wanted, Like, what are you
Speaker 1: talking about? And they ding me? So once you like
Speaker 1: get ding so many times you can't drive for them
Speaker 1: or deliver groceries for them anymore, which is a sweet
Speaker 1: little deal. Man. I take the ones like three in
Speaker 1: the morning, there'd be extra money on it. Yeah, I'll
Speaker 1: go do that. I did the door Dash.
Speaker 4: I almost switched the ship, yeah, because I heard you
Speaker 4: can make So one time the ship driver and me
Speaker 4: were coming to the same house and we were like,
Speaker 4: start talking. Is walked away and he's like, I used
Speaker 4: to do door Dash. He's talking about how he gets
Speaker 4: more money doing chips, and I was like, oh, but
Speaker 4: I had like all the perks in the door Dash.
Speaker 1: I could do it when I wanted.
Speaker 4: I didn't have to schedule, I got the priority like
Speaker 4: high paying one, stuff like that. So I just stuck
Speaker 4: with it. But that was like the second money making
Speaker 4: thing I did in recovery was driving door dash. Yeah,
Speaker 4: so I actually had a lot of fun.
Speaker 1: Yeah, the ship was all right, you know, I got
Speaker 1: to figure out myer stores pretty good. That's right. When
Speaker 1: they switched it around too, Yeah, it messed me up.
Speaker 1: So that was but yeah, but it was easy money,
Speaker 1: I guess at the time sort of you know, but
Speaker 1: I don't know. I did uber for a minute that
Speaker 1: it's worthless, like that doesn't pay for anything like you're like, wait,
Speaker 1: so I got fronted gas that now now I actually
Speaker 1: have to pay if I'm just I'm paying for gas.
Speaker 1: When you guys pay me back, I just pay the
Speaker 1: gas bill and then that's it.
Speaker 4: Like half the doordaskimoney, I made one to guess pretty much.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's tough though, but finding that job, man, it's
Speaker 1: very important that you, like, like I said, get something
Speaker 1: that you can just kind of ease into at first.
Speaker 1: If you're like not sure what you want to do,
Speaker 1: if you don't have a career path already, like laid
Speaker 1: out in Stone, if you've been doing something for twenty years,
Speaker 1: like I was doing radio, you know, I didn't want
Speaker 1: to go back into radio, so I knew I had
Speaker 1: to find something else. But if you're a tool, a
Speaker 1: die maker, or if you're a doctor or a vet,
Speaker 1: you're probably gonna want to go back to that job again,
Speaker 1: you know. But just take it easy when you do
Speaker 1: go back, is what I would say. And just really
Speaker 1: lay it, lay it out, you know, for yourself. This
Speaker 1: is not going to stress me. I'm just gonna go
Speaker 1: do my job and go home. But I think a
Speaker 1: lot of those people have different problems. They will go
Speaker 1: out by their drug of choice. Looks like, if you're
Speaker 1: a Hollywood movie star, you're an actor, and you're making
Speaker 1: two million dollars of film, no thanks, I would be dead,
Speaker 1: you know, back in my using days, because that's all
Speaker 1: that's the only thing I was missing was the money
Speaker 1: to go get more and if I had access to it,
Speaker 1: Like they were saying, the dudes the guy from Friends
Speaker 1: that died, Matthew Perry, like they charged him like fifty
Speaker 1: thousand dollars for like five hundred dollars bag of drugs,
Speaker 1: and they kept doing that, you know, because they knew
Speaker 1: they could get it from him, you know, and he
Speaker 1: had tons and tons of money, so it didn't matter
Speaker 1: to him. He just wanted some shit. Yep. So like yeah,
Speaker 1: that I think a lot of those people go out
Speaker 1: that way, you know, because it ticks, so you don't
Speaker 1: have enough to get anymore to hit that rock bottom
Speaker 1: or least start to chip away at the rock bottom.
Speaker 4: Can I ask a question you mentioned, and that's for
Speaker 4: all of us. You mentioned in there, when you're talking
Speaker 4: about the newspaper job that you didn't like, say that
Speaker 4: you were in recovery, said you were an alcoholic and
Speaker 4: he hits overtime. Yep, when did you gut switch over
Speaker 4: into identifying as.
Speaker 1: Being in recovery?
Speaker 4: And I'll give like an example for like My answer is,
Speaker 4: there was a couple of times that I got sober
Speaker 4: and it was just me getting my shit together, is
Speaker 4: what I called it, because I just knew that I
Speaker 4: drank too much. I wouldn't even identify as an alcoholic yet.
Speaker 4: And then there was like when I was reaching like
Speaker 4: that time going into working at the hospital, I started
Speaker 4: to call myself an alcoholic and I knew that I
Speaker 4: had to quit drinking. But it wasn't until I got
Speaker 4: sober this last time where the program I was in
Speaker 4: started saying there using the recovery terminology, and it was
Speaker 4: kind of new to me, and I didn't use it
Speaker 4: a lot still because of the stigma. And it was
Speaker 4: really when I met Corey in two seventeen recovery that
Speaker 4: became a really big deal in a really big term
Speaker 4: and something that I really identified with, you know, in a.
Speaker 1: Community that I engaged with. How did that work for
Speaker 1: you guys?
Speaker 2: For me, it was meat and Corey and treatment. I
Speaker 2: mean I didn't, I mean, I'd get my shit together
Speaker 2: like you said a couple of times throughout my life,
Speaker 2: but I didn't realize I had a problem till probably
Speaker 2: a year before I got arrested. And then once I
Speaker 2: got arrested, I'm like, well, shit, I gotta get my
Speaker 2: life together, Like, don't want to be doing this on
Speaker 2: repeat cycle, like nine months in counties bullshit, Like like
Speaker 2: I'd much rather go to prison than set any more
Speaker 2: County time in my life.
Speaker 1: Obviously. You know, there's just you guy should get to
Speaker 1: move around.
Speaker 2: You know, it's still your lockdown, but you just be
Speaker 2: able to get to move around.
Speaker 1: And I didn't want to go to.
Speaker 2: Prison and find out what prison was like. You know
Speaker 2: what horror stories about dropping the soap, so I didn't
Speaker 2: want to find that out. It was shower with twenty
Speaker 2: other guys, just not my cup of tea. Went to
Speaker 2: treatment mister Winfield, and it just that's when everything just
Speaker 2: kind of fell into place, and he's like, no, dude,
Speaker 2: you're serious. You need to go here. You need to
Speaker 2: go here and do the right things in life. And
Speaker 2: like you said, you know, getting a job just ease
Speaker 2: back into things. I got a little BS gas station
Speaker 2: job in Pointe City where they didn't sell alcohol. And
Speaker 2: that was great because even though alcohol wasn't my choice,
Speaker 2: I mean, if I would have probably sold enough of it,
Speaker 2: I would have probably ended up buying a bottle tastes
Speaker 2: like right, oh, that's still snaking choice.
Speaker 1: I can drink that. That bottle is.
Speaker 2: Really cool, you know, yeah, because some people that drink
Speaker 2: alcohol buy it because of the bottle looks cool, like
Speaker 2: they don't care what it is. Well, that bottle looks cool,
Speaker 2: kay of like the skullhead and you know it's just
Speaker 2: like whatever. But that's what it really took effect is
Speaker 2: what I went into residential treatment, and at first it
Speaker 2: was identifying myself as a drug addict. But after a
Speaker 2: couple of weeks of being there, me and you sat
Speaker 2: down and talked about You're like, no, you, this is
Speaker 2: how you need to say it, like you're a person
Speaker 2: in recovery, and you actually showed me how to use
Speaker 2: the words properly versus just doing what everyone else was
Speaker 2: in there doing.
Speaker 1: About you, Corey, when.
Speaker 3: I first came, when I first got sober, I did
Speaker 3: not think I was an alcoholic a drug I really
Speaker 3: didn't think I had a problem. I was just twenty seven.
Speaker 3: I like to drink and drive, I knew that was
Speaker 3: my problem, so I was like trying to figure out
Speaker 3: the ways, right of, like when I get done with probation,
Speaker 3: I'm gonna drink responsibly. Yeah. Well, then the more of
Speaker 3: that time that I stuck around I did start out,
Speaker 3: I was forced to go to AA. So that's where,
Speaker 3: like my first two and a half years of my
Speaker 3: sobriety is in AA. I started to say like that
Speaker 3: I was learning and I was an alcoholic because I
Speaker 3: had to. I had to learn like what I did
Speaker 3: that was wrong. And then as time went on, like
Speaker 3: I still identify as an alcoholic at times because really
Speaker 3: that is my main my main problem, but more and more,
Speaker 3: like in the last couple of years, I've learned that
Speaker 3: I am a person in recovery because there's like the
Speaker 3: driving factors of why I drink, and you know, the
Speaker 3: behaviors that I did or that I still do. There's
Speaker 3: them behaviors that drove me to the drink, which then
Speaker 3: opened the world to being a drug addict because I
Speaker 3: do drugs too. I did anything to I'd say, I
Speaker 3: didn't mind being who I am. What I wanted to
Speaker 3: do was to just scape the reality part. I wanted
Speaker 3: to have fun, and I put drinking and doing drugs
Speaker 3: was more fun for me because it intensified it. Right,
Speaker 3: and then it also like I was going places with
Speaker 3: it where when I wasn't doing any drugs or drinking
Speaker 3: that I'm working or being a or at home being
Speaker 3: a single mom, and I wanted to be out and
Speaker 3: about having fun.
Speaker 1: Sounds like my sister, like Kylie, So you said the
Speaker 1: text message about this one like in the.
Speaker 4: Last two two and a half years started, You've got
Speaker 4: like thirty seven years of.
Speaker 1: Sobriety, right.
Speaker 3: I have. I'll be ten years sober on Saint Patti's Day.
Speaker 1: That blows my mind. I can't wait. Yeah, almost four.
Speaker 1: So I don't know if she answered your question kind of.
Speaker 4: She started to consider being in recovery like in the
Speaker 4: last two two and a half.
Speaker 3: Years, because it's really it's more about not just being
Speaker 3: like an alcoholic. I'm a person that's recovering from several things. Right.
Speaker 1: The question was hard to because it's.
Speaker 3: Like, why do you identify the process.
Speaker 4: Of going from I just drink too much too, I'm
Speaker 4: an alcoholic to a person in recovery, you know, because
Speaker 4: I see like how we all identify ourselves as being
Speaker 4: people in recovery, and that took steps of I'm an
Speaker 4: alcoholic and all the other stuff. But like you mentioned
Speaker 4: in your story earlier, where you're working at that job
Speaker 4: and you didn't even identify with recovery, you did call
Speaker 4: yourself an alcoholic and your sober, you know, but being
Speaker 4: able to live my life out loud in recovery kind
Speaker 4: of happened because I saw you doing it, and so
Speaker 4: I was just kind of wondering and wanted everybody else's
Speaker 4: idea of kind of how it worked for them, I think.
Speaker 1: And for me it was when I wasn't going into
Speaker 1: treatment that last time too, because I realized, Okay, I've
Speaker 1: been doing this shit wrong. Like I've been calling myself
Speaker 1: an alcoholic, I've been going to AA meetings, I'm beating
Speaker 1: myself up. And I don't know if it was somebody
Speaker 1: in Bear River maybe said something. I have no idea,
Speaker 1: but I know for me though, it was like a student,
Speaker 1: I just started thinking, how am I going to do
Speaker 1: this different? I was like, first of all, and I
Speaker 1: remember when I walked into Bear River too, I was like,
Speaker 1: I'm done beating myself up. And I think that's when
Speaker 1: it hit me like, I'm not going to be Corey
Speaker 1: the alcoholic. I'm going to be Corey the person who's
Speaker 1: in recovery. And I'm not ashamed that I'm in recovery.
Speaker 1: That I changed my life, going to live a new
Speaker 1: life that I create. There's nothing wrong with that. No,
Speaker 1: why don't I have to say I'm an alcoholic. Oh,
Speaker 1: I'm in recovery. That old me is done. I'm done
Speaker 1: with that guy. I'm moving on. And it was scary,
Speaker 1: not knowing what I was going to create or what
Speaker 1: I was going to do, but I knew I had
Speaker 1: to do something and just changing the way I thought
Speaker 1: about things in my own head. I wake up in
Speaker 1: the morning, I don't beat myself up. Well I'm just
Speaker 1: an alcohol No, I'm in recovery. I'm living a different
Speaker 1: life and I get to build something new today. Yeah,
Speaker 1: And it became exciting for me. And like when I
Speaker 1: worked at ATS TOO, I would tell people, you know,
Speaker 1: like they would say, oh, I'm a drunk junkie. They
Speaker 1: would say all this stuff to identify themselves, and I
Speaker 1: was like, stop doing that. Yeah, negative, if you want
Speaker 1: to fine, but if you want to get on top
Speaker 1: of this and live different, think different. You gotta be
Speaker 1: in recovery, man, you gotta change that, because then I'd
Speaker 1: always say, raise your hand if you have. But anybody
Speaker 1: used drugs today? No, well then you're in recovery. You know, like,
Speaker 1: let's go move it forward. You know what's the next step.
Speaker 1: And I would say that kind of stuff to them
Speaker 1: to kind of get to move them forward, because it's
Speaker 1: easy to be stuck and well, an alcohol it comes
Speaker 1: just what I do know.
Speaker 2: My part, my biggest part was realizing that everyone who
Speaker 2: I thought was friends weren't really friends. I think that
Speaker 2: was my hardest part of about coming into recovery, was
Speaker 2: having to let go of everyone from the past and
Speaker 2: move forward and create new people to associate, socialize with.
Speaker 1: And someone Okay, throw out there to you guys, someone
Speaker 1: who's an alcoholic. You expect them to go to the
Speaker 1: liquor store to get some liquor if something bad happens, right, Yeah,
Speaker 1: they're an alcoholic, so they do. Would you expect a
Speaker 1: person of recovery to do that? No? I expect them
Speaker 1: to go to a meeting. Yeah, I mean, it's just
Speaker 1: something so simple. Is just changing how you say it
Speaker 1: and how you feel about it.
Speaker 3: I also too. I think it's when we tell her,
Speaker 3: tell ourselves that, oh, you're just an alcoholic, right, we
Speaker 3: automatically go to all the bad words that go with
Speaker 3: the alcoholic, like that you're not good enough, you're this,
Speaker 3: you're that, you're a cursor, you're not a good worker,
Speaker 3: you're a thief, you're a liar, you're a cheating jokester,
Speaker 3: or same with drug addict. We go to all the
Speaker 3: stigmatizing words that have people have put us on. You're
Speaker 3: nothing but a drug addict and all this stuff. So
Speaker 3: then when we all of a sudden we tell ourselves
Speaker 3: that we are a person in recovery, I think that's
Speaker 3: it changes too, Like.
Speaker 1: Take those options out, like I'm gonna I'm gonna go
Speaker 1: get some drugs. I'm gonnaet a bottle. You don't even
Speaker 1: think about because you're in recovery. You told yourself that
Speaker 1: all day, last two months, last two years, you're in recovery.
Speaker 1: And so the start something bad happens like this, it's
Speaker 1: not an option. And I did take that option off
Speaker 1: the table. I think by doing that, and that was
Speaker 1: one of the things I wanted to do.
Speaker 2: Well, you've said multiple times even you've brought this instance,
Speaker 2: up you had a disagreement with somebody, you got upset,
Speaker 2: and instead of going to the liquor store, the first
Speaker 2: place you found yourself was at a meeting hall and
Speaker 2: you stayed for two meetings.
Speaker 1: Yeah, back to back, that shit, and then the way home.
Speaker 1: That's what it hit me. I'm like, I did not
Speaker 1: one time think about getting a bottle. No, not one time,
Speaker 1: you know, That's what I was like, Holy shit, this
Speaker 1: is what it is. This is this is that recovery stuff,
Speaker 1: you know, Like I finally turned the page.
Speaker 4: What I like about it is you're not sitting in
Speaker 4: the negative of calling yourself an addict or an alcoholic.
Speaker 4: You're not ignoring it and kind of shucking the accountability,
Speaker 4: Like if you just kind of ignore it and like
Speaker 4: act like it didn't happen. Being in recovery is like
Speaker 4: a positive progression forward since it's empowering too. Yeah, so
Speaker 4: you explain that, but yeah, I like it too.
Speaker 3: I think so too, because I mean, look at our
Speaker 3: recovery community that we have, Look at the people that
Speaker 3: are putting the hard work and recovery and standing together
Speaker 3: and showing and you know, for me today, like if
Speaker 3: I didn't have my recovery. After Thanksgiving morning, I wouldn't
Speaker 3: be sitting here. I wouldn't have showed up to have
Speaker 3: a Thanksgiving dinner meal. I wouldn't have.
Speaker 1: No. Yeah. And six years ago, when I was sitting
Speaker 1: in jail, as somebody was like, hey to you here,
Speaker 1: Corey Winfield got arrested for drunk driving, they'd be like, yeah,
Speaker 1: he's an alcoholic today. Oh here Corey Winfields. Oh yeah, yeah,
Speaker 1: he's in recovery. Like they're they're saying two different things.
Speaker 1: Well today people would be like, what, cryinfind's in recovery. No,
Speaker 1: but the would be like Corey Winfields in recovery, and
Speaker 1: they wouldn't be like Corey Winfield, Yeah he's in recovery, right,
Speaker 1: you know, like they would before. And we'll always have
Speaker 1: our haters. Yeah, there's people that hate me.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I think they're just jealous because they don't
Speaker 3: know how to how to get to that step and
Speaker 3: seeing us living a joyful, free we're not being controlled
Speaker 3: by a substance or a drug.
Speaker 1: There's more haters than there are celebrators, man, and you
Speaker 1: just have to kind of deal with it, you know.
Speaker 1: And someone said this a long time ago, and treatment
Speaker 1: it's no new there. It's your What they think about
Speaker 1: you is love your business. Yeah, And the only way
Speaker 1: you can change they think about you is by how
Speaker 1: you act. M And like I said, people can't call
Speaker 1: me alcolic today. They can, but it wouldn't make much sense,
Speaker 1: you know.
Speaker 3: Like, Okay, that's what I was saying about. Earlier. I
Speaker 3: was talking to one of my recoveries you know about,
Speaker 3: and I was just saying, you know, like I had before,
Speaker 3: I want to go out and start a dumpster fire.
Speaker 3: I have to think about my actions because I'm in
Speaker 3: recovery and that's what people are expecting me to do
Speaker 3: right now. These people that aren't in recovery that know me,
Speaker 3: they're waiting for me to come up and blow up
Speaker 3: a situation. And so that's where I just need to
Speaker 3: practice what my recovery has taught me, and that's you
Speaker 3: don't get to behave like that anymore.
Speaker 4: Wait a minute, So I have to not drink and
Speaker 4: I can't start dumpster fires. I didn't sign up for that.
Speaker 3: What we do we practice to do better to not
Speaker 3: like the dumpster fire.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that you should be your goal every day. Don't
Speaker 1: like the dumpster fire. But we will end on that.
Speaker 1: No dumpster fire, Okay, no dumpster no, all right, we'll
Speaker 1: end on that then, all right, thanks for listening to
Speaker 1: seventeen Recovery dot com is the website, and of course
Speaker 1: the guy that's going to come on NeXT's go and
Speaker 1: talk you about all the episodes you can listen to
Speaker 1: and where you can find them. But I appreciate you listening.
Speaker 1: Thank you so much. Later, thanks for listening to the
Speaker 1: two seventeen Recovery podcast. Listen to over nine hundred episodes
Speaker 1: on the two seventeen Recovery app that's free in your
Speaker 1: app store or online at two seventeen recovery dot com