Speaker 1: This is Doctor Wendy Walsh and you're listening to kf
Speaker 1: I Am six forty the Doctor Wendy Walsh Show on
Speaker 1: demand on the iHeartRadio app. It's always my pleasure to
Speaker 1: be with you every Sunday from seven to nine pm,
Speaker 1: where I talk about everything psychology, mental health and mostly
Speaker 1: our love lives and our attachment style. Hey, producer, Kayla,
Speaker 1: how are you on a dream, Doctor Wendy. Live in
Speaker 1: the dream? Live in the dream? Have you picked out
Speaker 1: your hat? Do you know what I'm talking about? I
Speaker 1: do know what you're talking about. I have a couple
Speaker 1: of from but I am going to be I feel
Speaker 1: like I'm traveling in time. Oh, you're in a wedding
Speaker 1: countdown and it is hot where our wedding is going
Speaker 1: to be. And so I have suggested that the ladies
Speaker 1: put on their biggest Kentucky Derby stunner. Why not a
Speaker 1: big sunn fascinator like a fascinator. Is that what it's called.
Speaker 1: That's what Google has taught me when I've been shopping
Speaker 1: for my fascinator hat to match the dress that I'm
Speaker 1: going to wear. That's what it That's what it led
Speaker 1: me to. Fascinator it's gonna be fun. I can't wait.
Speaker 1: And who we got Elmer on the board. How are you, Elmer?
Speaker 1: I'm good, I'm doing good. Thanks you good. Good to
Speaker 1: see you. We got to Heather Brooker. Heather, I have
Speaker 1: to tell you that I just googled you for another
Speaker 1: reason unrelated, and I love the picture that Google shows me. First.
Speaker 1: It's beautiful. Oh no, which one that's funny? I don't know.
Speaker 1: But you look glamorous and happy.
Speaker 2: Oh thank you?
Speaker 1: Say that's what we want, the first thing to see
Speaker 1: when the Internet gives us something.
Speaker 2: Right, Oh good?
Speaker 1: Oh I see it's where I'm smiling really big in
Speaker 1: my kiss dress. Yeah, thank you? So? Uh have you
Speaker 1: been watching the Olympics? Everybody been watching?
Speaker 2: I'm watching.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm watching right now. Yeah. Oh good, keep up
Speaker 1: because if we have any important updates, I hope you're
Speaker 1: going to jump in with it. It's a it's a
Speaker 1: highlight of my four years. Just so let you know.
Speaker 1: I love Olympics. And the big news is my own
Speaker 1: daughter Carrington, who lives in Paris, is there today. She
Speaker 1: was at let's see swimming and gymnastics, which is cool,
Speaker 1: and she made a little TikTok video because that's how
Speaker 1: moms get to keep in touch with their kids. They
Speaker 1: get to just look at their TikTok videos and go, oh,
Speaker 1: they're having a nice life. That's great. I was mowing
Speaker 1: the lawn and I put some some peroxide in my
Speaker 1: hot water heater today. Do you know you have to
Speaker 1: do that, Kayla? Sometimes I did not know that. Yeah,
Speaker 1: well sometimes they smell skanky. Can we say skanky on
Speaker 1: the radio? Oh? Did you hear that?
Speaker 2: That means?
Speaker 1: Don't say that word on the radio. I think that's
Speaker 1: what that meants. Oh, oh okay, So Simone Biles, can
Speaker 1: we just stop and talk about this amazing woman who's
Speaker 1: my biggest hero. I like to call her our new
Speaker 1: poster child for mental health care. She currently leads in
Speaker 1: Olympic qualifiers in Paris. She's twenty seven years old. I
Speaker 1: want to say that again. She's twenty seven years old.
Speaker 1: When she was eighteen and she was winning gymnastics medals,
Speaker 1: she said, I don't think I'll be doing this past
Speaker 1: the age of twenty. I mean that would be silly, right,
Speaker 1: twenty seven still at it. She is probably the best
Speaker 1: gymnast in history, both by her natural talent and her
Speaker 1: medal count. She has a record thirty seven Olympic and
Speaker 1: World medals. She has I would say, completely transformed the
Speaker 1: sport and now her dangerously difficult routines remain unmatched by others.
Speaker 1: And you gotta know, this young woman for years and
Speaker 1: years has sacrificed both her body and her mind. Now
Speaker 1: I want to remind you if you haven't been watching
Speaker 1: the news in recent years, she's been psychologically tormented by
Speaker 1: the fact that she is open as a survivor of
Speaker 1: sexual assault. She was one of hundreds of women sexually
Speaker 1: assaulted by the former National Media team doctor Lawrence Nasar.
Speaker 1: She also has endured all kinds of physical pain. She
Speaker 1: has had foot problems, ankle problems, knee problems. She once
Speaker 1: competed with a full on kidney infection and didn't take
Speaker 1: any painkillers because she didn't want to test with any
Speaker 1: drugs in her system. But before Nasar's abuse, and before
Speaker 1: I don't have to remind everybody the FBI's bungling of
Speaker 1: the case, she suffered major depression and anxiety. And before
Speaker 1: all of that she had been a bubbly teenager. But
Speaker 1: her big downfall happened in twenty twenty one. You might
Speaker 1: remember the Tokyo Games, she got what is called a
Speaker 1: case of the twisties, which means during a qualifying event,
Speaker 1: she realized in mid air that she had no idea
Speaker 1: where her body was in relation to the ground, literally
Speaker 1: like lost all sense of balance. In fact, in one landing,
Speaker 1: she flew so far out of bounds that she slid
Speaker 1: off the competition's surface. In golf and baseball, they call
Speaker 1: it the yips. In gymnastics they call it the twisties,
Speaker 1: where they literally forget how to do what they need
Speaker 1: to do. So she quit, She walked off. Now, then
Speaker 1: the internet took over and those critics took to their
Speaker 1: keyboards after she withdrew. And even though she said she
Speaker 1: had a mental block and she was disoriented in the air,
Speaker 1: she was attacked. So I did little research to figure out,
Speaker 1: like what happened in twenty twenty one, like what was
Speaker 1: going on? Well, she's used to having her parents and
Speaker 1: her sister in the stands because it was during COVID
Speaker 1: there were no fans alone and her family was not
Speaker 1: allowed in, and her sister wasn't there to say go
Speaker 1: simone right before and so there was this moment where
Speaker 1: she was triggered from being alone. And you gotta know,
Speaker 1: besides that sexual assault, Simone Biles has overcome so much
Speaker 1: childhood trauma. She was born in Columbus, Ohio. Both her
Speaker 1: parents struggled with alcoholism and drug addiction. Her father abandoned
Speaker 1: the family early on, and her mother was unable to
Speaker 1: care for Simone and her three siblings. She was sent
Speaker 1: to foster care when she was just three years old. Eventually,
Speaker 1: she was adopted by her mom's her mom's father, her
Speaker 1: grandfather biological grandfather, and his second wife, Nellie. Nellie loving
Speaker 1: this woman, she calls her mom. She's been there with
Speaker 1: her all the way along. Biles spent two years or
Speaker 1: more in therapy. She was planning to never come back,
Speaker 1: and another former olympian told her, you're gonna if it's
Speaker 1: still in your body, just get your brain fixed. And
Speaker 1: she did, and she is back and we are all
Speaker 1: cheering her on, and I am so proud that she's
Speaker 1: talking openly about therapy and mental health and just I
Speaker 1: love this woman, just love her, just saying, all right,
Speaker 1: when we come back, I want to change up the
Speaker 1: conversation a little bit. I mentioned earlier in the show
Speaker 1: that I'm on a wedding countdown. I won't say how
Speaker 1: many days or I'll get dizzy in a case of
Speaker 1: the twisties myself. What stuff changes if you are somebody
Speaker 1: who's getting married, who got married, knows somebody who's getting married,
Speaker 1: if your friend is getting married. There's all kinds of
Speaker 1: social circle adjustments that happen, and there's some psychological things
Speaker 1: that happen when somebody in a social circle gets married,
Speaker 1: or I should add it also happens when somebody in
Speaker 1: a social circle gets divorced. Let's talk about the fallout,
Speaker 1: both positive and negative from unions and separations. When we
Speaker 1: come back. You are listening to the Doctor Wendy Waalsh
Speaker 1: Show on KFI AM six forty. We're live everywhere on
Speaker 1: the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 2: You're listening to Doctor Wendy Walsh on demand from KFI
Speaker 2: AM six forty.
Speaker 1: Doctor Wendy Walsh with you. This is the Doctor Wendy
Speaker 1: Walls Show. I mean, my friends are shocked by the
Speaker 1: way I've been a single mother for like twenty years
Speaker 1: and put my kids first. They're both doing great, thank
Speaker 1: you very much, and it's time. It's time I tied
Speaker 1: the knot. And people are like, why Why are your age?
Speaker 1: Why buy that? Why do it? Because we love each
Speaker 1: other and we know nobody's going anywhere at this point,
Speaker 1: so why not have a party. That's what I'm saying.
Speaker 1: You know, there's a lot of stress in wedding planning,
Speaker 1: But the truth is, I worry less about everything going smoothly,
Speaker 1: and I'm more likely to worry about my guests having
Speaker 1: a good time. So I am more worried about the
Speaker 1: food and the cocktails and the table decorations than my dress.
Speaker 1: My dress hasn't even done yet. I haven't even seen it.
Speaker 1: I don't know it. It doesn't matter, And you know what,
Speaker 1: I think, the fun happens when mistakes happen. You know,
Speaker 1: I went to see with Julio, Tina Fey and Amy
Speaker 1: Poehler a few months ago, and they have a thing
Speaker 1: at the end of their live show where people can
Speaker 1: ask questions. I think they put, you know, little questions
Speaker 1: in a box or something and they get chosen and
Speaker 1: pull it out. And one of the questions was from
Speaker 1: a woman, I'm marrying my girlfriend, any advice on what
Speaker 1: we should or shouldn't do for the wedding? And I
Speaker 1: think Amy Poehler said, you've got to have the crazy, racist, sexist,
Speaker 1: drunk uncle give the toast, because then the wedding will
Speaker 1: have something to talk about. Right, of course, we don't
Speaker 1: have one of those in our family. But I can't
Speaker 1: worry about anything, is the point. But I do want
Speaker 1: to say that I've noticed things changing in my life,
Speaker 1: positive and negative. I want to remind everybody that both
Speaker 1: marriage and divorce are highly contagious among social circles. There's
Speaker 1: lots of research to support this. Divorce six degrees with separation.
Speaker 1: In other words, you might be six couples away from
Speaker 1: the couple that is getting divorced, and there might be
Speaker 1: a ripple effect of news and information. Literally, dudes, if
Speaker 1: your wife has a friend who's going through a divorce,
Speaker 1: don't let her go out and hang out with her
Speaker 1: feeling contagious. The weddings are also contagious. People go to
Speaker 1: weddings and they're feeling closer, they feel misty, they feel romance.
Speaker 1: But there's all kinds of unconscious things going on. You see,
Speaker 1: in our modern culture, relationships, particularly marriages, tend to be
Speaker 1: a bridge between tribes, and bridges are made, bridges are
Speaker 1: broken and everybody. They're also kind of the social organizer
Speaker 1: for all kinds of things like I will say very
Speaker 1: clearly that the worst part about being a single mother,
Speaker 1: besides being dog tired and having no money all those years,
Speaker 1: was feeling excluded by couples. You know, I didn't get
Speaker 1: those couple invitations, And now I love having couples over
Speaker 1: for dinner. I'm like, oh my god, a couple I
Speaker 1: haven't you know? Mind you there was a really great,
Speaker 1: wonderful group of single mothers in my life, but I
Speaker 1: didn't have those couple invitations. So what happens when somebody's
Speaker 1: getting married. Some people start to feel abandoned. Some people
Speaker 1: might feel jealous. Some people might feel you're just going
Speaker 1: to be too busy, or you'll change right. They're all
Speaker 1: kinds of things that can happen. But I'm also noticing
Speaker 1: certain people. As I'm feeling certain people become distant, I'm
Speaker 1: also feeling certain people become closer, which is fascinating. Not
Speaker 1: all couple people, but just different friends. So really, I'm
Speaker 1: just sitting back and watching it all, trying not to
Speaker 1: take certain things too personally, and just sort of seeing
Speaker 1: how all the cards lay out, if it will. I
Speaker 1: have never felt so sure about something in my life.
Speaker 1: Although I want to remind everybody that went till death
Speaker 1: to us part was invented. Death was pretty imminent. If
Speaker 1: you got married in the year nineteen hundred, the average
Speaker 1: length of that marriage was about twelve years because somebody
Speaker 1: died of something. If you got married in nineteen ninety,
Speaker 1: your average length of that marriage was about twelve years.
Speaker 1: In this case, it was divorce. Well, we're of a
Speaker 1: certain age where I think it's okay to say till
Speaker 1: death to us part. He hates it when I make
Speaker 1: that joke. He hates it when I make that joke.
Speaker 1: I'm like, honey, somebody's going to die soon. I'm just saying.
Speaker 1: He does not like that, this morbid, dark sense of humor,
Speaker 1: but I do. Hey, when we come back, I want
Speaker 1: to talk about AI, but not just artificial intelligence, another
Speaker 1: kind of AI that is already happening and about to explode,
Speaker 1: artificial intimacy. You are listening to the Doctor Wendy wall
Speaker 1: Show on KFI AM six forty. We're live everywhere on
Speaker 1: the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 2: You're listening to Doctor Wendy Walsh on demand from KFI
Speaker 2: AM six forty.
Speaker 1: The future is here. I was listening to a really
Speaker 1: good episode of NPR's Body Electric. It's a great podcast
Speaker 1: by manuche Zamorrodi and the podcast was called if it
Speaker 1: Feels Real, Should we care if it's not? And in
Speaker 1: it they explore this idea of artificial intimacy. They asked
Speaker 1: the same questions that the characters in the movie Her asked.
Speaker 1: If it feels good and it feels like a real relationship,
Speaker 1: then it must be doing good, right. I mean, I
Speaker 1: have been saying this for years that close intimate relationships
Speaker 1: are really good for us. They're good for our mental health,
Speaker 1: they're good for our physical health. There's lots of research
Speaker 1: to show that you're less likely to have heart disease,
Speaker 1: high blood pressure. One time I had a cardiologist on
Speaker 1: who said he's never had a patient who was in love.
Speaker 1: They've never had heart problems. You're less likely to suffer
Speaker 1: from depression when you're in a relationship, or develop all
Speaker 1: kinds of other chronic illnesses. And yes, long term committed
Speaker 1: people actually live longer. So evolutionary psychologists have also found
Speaker 1: that when you spend time with people you start to
Speaker 1: mas mack each other, you get a biological mirroring that
Speaker 1: happens your limbic systems. You start gesturing. You ever see
Speaker 1: couples they talk the same way, they walk the same way,
Speaker 1: but actually their brain waves get in sync. I will
Speaker 1: tell you flat out that the number one reason that
Speaker 1: I am marrying Julio is because he relaxes me. There's
Speaker 1: something that happens when we're together where we feel calmer.
Speaker 1: So if it all feels good, do we actually need
Speaker 1: to connect with our humans? I know lots of people
Speaker 1: have pets and animals and get some of the same benefits,
Speaker 1: probably not the romantic or the sexual relationship, but just
Speaker 1: being near and petting your blood pressure right. It makes
Speaker 1: me wonder if these kind of artificial relationships, and plenty
Speaker 1: of people are already having them just in you know,
Speaker 1: online love relationships. Like I can't believe how many will
Speaker 1: write to me and say, you know, having this boyfriend
Speaker 1: problem and we've been together for three years. And then
Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, well what exactly is the problem, And
Speaker 1: something will come out that the person will say, well,
Speaker 1: you know, the time zone thing is a problem, and
Speaker 1: I'm like, oh, it's a long distance relationship. No, it's
Speaker 1: an online relationship, And I'm like, wait, a minute. You've
Speaker 1: never met each other in the real world. Look how
Speaker 1: many seasons of Catfish are on MTV now from this
Speaker 1: people having these emotional connections. It makes me wonder if
Speaker 1: this artificial intimacy is kind of like a placebo drug.
Speaker 1: You know, when they do double blind control studies and
Speaker 1: they give one group of people the sugar pill. They
Speaker 1: don't know it's the sugar pill. A good chunk of
Speaker 1: them get better anyway, Right, So it's artificial intimacy, kind
Speaker 1: of like a placebo. Look, we're already having relationships with bots.
Speaker 1: Take only your navigation. I have a young, pretty, I
Speaker 1: imagine she's pretty Irish girl who navigates me around. A
Speaker 1: friend of mine has a male with an Indian accent.
Speaker 1: She calls him Raj. She's given him a name. They
Speaker 1: chat right, Siri Alexa. Yesterday I had the wonderful pleasure
Speaker 1: of babysitting a one year old neighbors of mine. And
Speaker 1: this kid was right in the middle of her stranger anxiety.
Speaker 1: So no sooner did mom and dad go out the
Speaker 1: door that she started screaming. And I was keeping myself
Speaker 1: calm because I know that's the first thing to do,
Speaker 1: and trying distraction that wasn't working. And then you know,
Speaker 1: I just allowed her to be sad for a while
Speaker 1: and cary and scream and then I thought, oh, maybe
Speaker 1: she'll get tired. So immediately I went to Alexa. I said, Alexa,
Speaker 1: blay me some lalla blies. Time to rut. Right, there's
Speaker 1: a robot in some ways. Your social media apps are
Speaker 1: listening all the time. Right. Some people are having relationships
Speaker 1: with people online ornography. Right, we know there's a chatbot
Speaker 1: for everything personal trainers, life coaches, therapists, but now lovers. Well,
Speaker 1: I think online artificial intimacy really is an illusion. You see,
Speaker 1: there's a problem with it. It teaches us what a
Speaker 1: relationship is when that relationship doesn't have any friction, any conflict,
Speaker 1: any pushback, or any vulnerability. And I think that is
Speaker 1: the challenge with technology producer, Kayla, I want you to
Speaker 1: try to get her on our show. I would love
Speaker 1: to speak with MIT psychologists and sociologists. Sherry Turkle because
Speaker 1: she has been her write that down. She has been
Speaker 1: studying our relationship with AI for a while. And here's
Speaker 1: her quote. She says, what I really think is bad,
Speaker 1: and I think that needs to be taken out of
Speaker 1: the equation is the technolog is saying I love you back,
Speaker 1: I care about you, and implying that their person who
Speaker 1: has a backstory, a life, and having an empathetic relationship
Speaker 1: with you. Because her biggest fear is that people will
Speaker 1: start to believe the robots that say I love you.
Speaker 1: Her best advice is, remember it's an operating system. Remember
Speaker 1: it's an avatar. Do not get so attached that you
Speaker 1: can't get away from it. Don't get addicted. You're getting
Speaker 1: addicted to your TikTok. You're getting addicted to your artificial
Speaker 1: girlfriend boyfriend. You know, my mom always used to say,
Speaker 1: never love anything that can't love you back. All right,
Speaker 1: speaking about emotions, when we come back, did you know
Speaker 1: there are three things that people with high emotional intelligence
Speaker 1: naturally do and we can all learn how to do
Speaker 1: these three things when we come back. You're listening to
Speaker 1: Doctor Wendy whe Show on KFI AM six forty. We're
Speaker 1: live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 2: You're listening to Doctor Wendy Walsh on demand from KFI
Speaker 2: AM six forty.
Speaker 1: This is the Doctor Wendy Welsh Show. I talk about
Speaker 1: emotional intelligence a lot, and it is, in my opinion,
Speaker 1: one hundred percent learned. Yeah, there's a genetic component. Some
Speaker 1: people are born with more concrete reasoning, more analytical. They
Speaker 1: might be a little bit on the autism spectrum and
Speaker 1: they have to work harder to pick up emotional or
Speaker 1: social cues. But for the rest of us, we can
Speaker 1: all learn how to be emotionally and emotionally intelligent. And
Speaker 1: why is the answer because people who are emotionally intelligent
Speaker 1: have better health, better mental health, and most importantly, better relationships.
Speaker 1: So I met this guy was having a drink at
Speaker 1: a bar, waiting for some friends for dinner, and he
Speaker 1: was so charismatic. He told me these really interesting stories
Speaker 1: about himself. I was amazed by some of the things
Speaker 1: he'd done in his life. It was a really great conversation.
Speaker 1: He seemed smart, he seemed entertaining, but he wasn't very
Speaker 1: emotionally intelligent. After I left, I thought to myself, Wow,
Speaker 1: he didn't ask me one thing about me. And when
Speaker 1: I dropped little breadcrumbs meaning that he would tell a
Speaker 1: story and I woulday, oh, that's like the time I was,
Speaker 1: you know, working, bah blah blah, and this happened to me.
Speaker 1: He didn't pick up that line, he went right back
Speaker 1: to another story about him not emotionally intelligent, yet pleasant enough,
Speaker 1: a great conversationalist. Another story. A few days ago, a
Speaker 1: girlfriend of mine texted me that she was she should
Speaker 1: in a text, but when people are shy about expressing
Speaker 1: negative things, they put it in text. Not the best advice.
Speaker 1: But she was irritated by something that I did. So
Speaker 1: I immediately called, and she wrote that she couldn't pick
Speaker 1: up the phone she was in a meeting, and so
Speaker 1: then I had to respond with a very long text
Speaker 1: saying I'm so sorry, Please tell me what I did.
Speaker 1: I didn't mean to hurt your feelings, and you're so
Speaker 1: important to me, and blah blah blah blah blah. Then
Speaker 1: she called me and she's like, I've never had a
Speaker 1: reaction like that from somebody. Usually they get so defensive,
Speaker 1: or they block you or they fight with you, you know.
Speaker 1: And you were just like, hey, how can I not
Speaker 1: have you have this feeling? Right? I have naturally a
Speaker 1: great deal of insight, but I won't lie to you.
Speaker 1: I spent eighteen years in therapy having emotional conversations with
Speaker 1: my therapist. I mean, on and off eighteen years you
Speaker 1: know when I needed it so that I could grow
Speaker 1: a better emotional length wuage. So I was reading this
Speaker 1: great article by doctor Jenny Woe, a Harvard trained psychologist,
Speaker 1: and she says, there are three things that people with
Speaker 1: high emotional intelligence do. First, they ask questions. They ask
Speaker 1: specific kinds of questions. They ask questions that relate to
Speaker 1: deep feelings. So I look back at that conversation I
Speaker 1: had with the guy at the bar, and I thought
Speaker 1: to myself, of course he was talking all about him,
Speaker 1: because there I was asking these deep questions that made
Speaker 1: him think. So people who are highly emotional intelligent might
Speaker 1: say things like, how did you get into and what
Speaker 1: are your thoughts on? What's your opinion on this? How
Speaker 1: do you feel about Say, you're asking about feelings, You're
Speaker 1: asking origin stories, You're asking opinions. People who are emotionally smart,
Speaker 1: who want to make connections with others, ask those kinds
Speaker 1: of questions. The other thing they do is most often naturally,
Speaker 1: but you can learn to do this. They mirror somebody's
Speaker 1: verbal tone and body language. Remember earlier I was talking
Speaker 1: about how in our intimate relationships we start to walk
Speaker 1: the same talk the same use. This make the kind
Speaker 1: of the same jokes of the same voice cadence. Right.
Speaker 1: This helps people stay close and connect it. So people
Speaker 1: with high emotionally emotional intelligence actually are really good at
Speaker 1: reading social cues. They are able to naturally mirror people
Speaker 1: and get this deep connection. So if somebody speaking fast,
Speaker 1: they speak fast. If somebody speaking slow they sleep, they
Speaker 1: speak slow. It's not copying, right, it's not manipulation. It's connecting.
Speaker 1: It's aligning with the other person and where they're at.
Speaker 1: And what does this do psychologically? It helps build trust
Speaker 1: and it helps show respect to the other person. So
Speaker 1: they asked questions. I was doing that with the guy
Speaker 1: at the bar. They mirror their vocal to I remember
Speaker 1: kind of doing the same thing. He was animated. I
Speaker 1: got animated with the stories, right. But here's where I
Speaker 1: realized he didn't have too much emotional intelligence. The third
Speaker 1: thing that highly emotionally intelligent people do is they share
Speaker 1: their personal stories of their own mistakes and failures, which
Speaker 1: I did. Right, So in our conversation, I'd say, oh, yeah,
Speaker 1: that thing that happened to me and blah blah blah,
Speaker 1: and there was no empathy that came back. He immediately
Speaker 1: went into his next story about himself. Right, So, people
Speaker 1: who are intelligent emotionally also have a backbone. They have
Speaker 1: self confidence. They can be real, they can be authentic.
Speaker 1: They're not afraid to talk about their fears or their failures.
Speaker 1: I can honestly say that I use my vulnerability as
Speaker 1: a strength. It's my way of connecting with people. I
Speaker 1: am fully human as you are if you're listening. We
Speaker 1: are imperfect people living in an imperfect world. Problems happen
Speaker 1: when we try to control other people or control the world.
Speaker 1: If we can instead sit back and say, hey, I
Speaker 1: am not perfect. I do want to add that sometimes
Speaker 1: emotionally intelligent people get rejected by people who are less
Speaker 1: emotionally intelligent or who have lower self esteem, because those
Speaker 1: people get a little rattled. They get a little scared
Speaker 1: by all your authenticity, right, particularly people who have an
Speaker 1: avoidant attachment style where emotions and intimacy are hard, and
Speaker 1: then there you are just bearing it all and talking
Speaker 1: about your feelings, and that scares them. Just no, they
Speaker 1: have difficulty forming close relationships anyway. It's not just you. Hey,
Speaker 1: when we come back, I want to open up my
Speaker 1: Instagram and my TikTok and my YouTube and producer Kayle's
Speaker 1: going to help me find some of your questions. Reminder
Speaker 1: to everybody, I'm not a therapist. I'm a psychology professor,
Speaker 1: but I love to weigh in with my opinion on
Speaker 1: your love lives. So if you've got a question, send
Speaker 1: me a DM. The handle is at doctor Wendy Walsh.
Speaker 1: You are listening to the Doctor Wendy Walsh Show on
Speaker 1: KFI AM six forty. We're live everywhere on the iHeartRadio app.
Speaker 1: You've been listening to Doctor Wendy Walsh. You can always
Speaker 1: hear us live on KFI AM six forty from seven
Speaker 1: to nine pm on Sunday and anytime on demand the
Speaker 1: iHeartRadio app