WEBVTT 1 00:00:08.519 --> 00:00:12.720 Welcome to the cultop cryptis Strange of counters of frogs 2 00:00:12.759 --> 00:00:17.280 and lizards, dumb my nick children, DoD Man, Bigfoot, Mockman 3 00:00:17.800 --> 00:00:19.399 and all their victims. 4 00:00:19.640 --> 00:00:22.079 Murray pictures captured by shot. 5 00:00:21.920 --> 00:00:26.719 Witness, ufoes breaking laws of physics, Pictures. 6 00:00:26.160 --> 00:00:29.920 Of aliens carving the high rogue lyphics. This is a 7 00:00:30.039 --> 00:00:31.160 bizarre world. 8 00:00:30.920 --> 00:00:31.879 That we live in. 9 00:00:32.399 --> 00:00:36.799 So sit back, relaxed, laugh and listen because we're here 10 00:00:36.840 --> 00:00:44.119 to talk about some cryptics. This is Todd Thompson Cousinos, 11 00:00:44.159 --> 00:00:49.280 the Raptilian from Strange Group Podcasts, and we're here I 12 00:00:49.359 --> 00:00:54.000 called the Conspiracy to talk about some bizarre and strange things. 13 00:00:54.640 --> 00:00:59.200 So strap in for this wild and hilarious ride. Now 14 00:00:59.240 --> 00:01:04.040 to the show, everybody. The curtains are open, we're checking 15 00:01:04.040 --> 00:01:13.640 tickets out the door. It's about to get strange, everybody. 16 00:01:26.599 --> 00:01:32.159 Jeffrey Dahmer soaked in blood, You and Obomber blowing up Waco, Texas, 17 00:01:32.159 --> 00:01:35.040 and Heaven's gaze that Helius modify and then from apes 18 00:01:35.280 --> 00:01:38.560 Hitler faced his death and then escaped. Bigg and the 19 00:01:38.640 --> 00:01:42.519 moth Man, son of Sam talking to talks again. Witches, 20 00:01:42.959 --> 00:01:46.959 Gon sank Comlins, this mysterious noise and Hottings. 21 00:01:46.640 --> 00:01:49.239 Dark Guards and the Scull and Bones most eleven. 22 00:01:49.319 --> 00:01:50.239 He's a probably loan. 23 00:01:50.519 --> 00:01:53.200 So when you're feeling all alone, grabbing beer and get 24 00:01:53.280 --> 00:01:56.239 stone a Welcome you to the podcast Trains Grow. 25 00:01:56.599 --> 00:02:00.159 What are here to entertain you? 26 00:02:00.760 --> 00:02:04.000 It's about. 27 00:02:10.039 --> 00:02:12.159 Why is the chicken the best animal ever? 28 00:02:13.000 --> 00:02:21.000 Why? Because that is so stupid but fucking funny? 29 00:02:21.039 --> 00:02:25.000 Actually, all right, what's going on? Welcome to the podcast 30 00:02:25.039 --> 00:02:27.400 is Strange Brew. I am one of your hosts, Tom 31 00:02:27.439 --> 00:02:29.080 Kat aka Tom Thompson. 32 00:02:28.840 --> 00:02:31.120 And who do I got super hungover? 33 00:02:32.400 --> 00:02:33.439 Why are you so hungover? 34 00:02:34.840 --> 00:02:35.280 Last night? 35 00:02:35.280 --> 00:02:37.080 I was watching the UFC. I was too, but I 36 00:02:37.080 --> 00:02:39.479 obviously didn't drink as much as you did. I woke 37 00:02:39.599 --> 00:02:42.560 up and yeah, I took a shot of whiskey and 38 00:02:42.599 --> 00:02:47.039 now I have an irish up coffee with strange strange 39 00:02:47.039 --> 00:02:50.400 Brew fucking mug that I got kind of get into 40 00:02:50.439 --> 00:02:53.520 camera view. But strange brew mug. 41 00:02:53.879 --> 00:02:57.879 Get your day at WW does dug? I also have 42 00:02:57.960 --> 00:02:58.840 an honish episode. 43 00:02:59.120 --> 00:03:02.199 Is that like a big mug? I haven't seen yours yet, though. 44 00:03:03.199 --> 00:03:07.360 It's a it's a nice It just an average looking mug, average. 45 00:03:06.919 --> 00:03:08.800 Size, average sized mug. 46 00:03:09.080 --> 00:03:14.680 Yeah, yeah, yeah, I'm having some whiskey and ship and also, uh, 47 00:03:15.199 --> 00:03:16.199 you're gonna make fun of me. 48 00:03:16.280 --> 00:03:19.319 But I like camp butcha, and technically it's brewed, so 49 00:03:19.360 --> 00:03:22.520 it is a brew. I also have some cam I like. 50 00:03:23.159 --> 00:03:25.639 I don't think I've ever even tried it, to be honest, it's. 51 00:03:25.479 --> 00:03:27.919 Not for everybody. It's really good for like gut health 52 00:03:27.960 --> 00:03:30.759 and gut floral whatever they they call it. I just 53 00:03:30.919 --> 00:03:33.120 actually kind of enjoy drinking it, and of know. 54 00:03:33.240 --> 00:03:35.800 But I should, I should clean out whatever the fucks 55 00:03:35.840 --> 00:03:36.680 in my inside. 56 00:03:37.080 --> 00:03:39.639 Yeah, I know, you should get one of those enemas 57 00:03:39.639 --> 00:03:41.479 where they shove the coffee up your ass and then 58 00:03:41.520 --> 00:03:42.919 spray coffee in your buttthole. 59 00:03:43.280 --> 00:03:46.240 Yeah, that's weird. I don't. I don't like it just. 60 00:03:46.240 --> 00:03:48.840 Like unlocks everything and it just flows out like the 61 00:03:48.960 --> 00:03:53.840 rivers of the Thames River in Britain's disgusting, all right. 62 00:03:53.919 --> 00:03:57.439 So on this episode, ringing it into the flat Woods Monster, 63 00:03:57.680 --> 00:04:01.159 the flat Woods Monster is a wee your ash fucking creature. 64 00:04:01.240 --> 00:04:04.240 We if you're a true fan and you remember some 65 00:04:04.319 --> 00:04:07.240 of the strange monsters we covered on a forgotten episode, 66 00:04:07.360 --> 00:04:09.000 we did kind of mention this, but I want to 67 00:04:09.039 --> 00:04:10.960 dive deeper in it because to me, it's probably one 68 00:04:11.000 --> 00:04:13.159 of the most fucked up cryptids, because that's technically what's 69 00:04:13.199 --> 00:04:13.759 labeled as. 70 00:04:13.919 --> 00:04:17.319 But it's a weird alien. We will get into maybe whatever. 71 00:04:17.399 --> 00:04:19.240 This thing is a flat wood. 72 00:04:19.920 --> 00:04:21.759 It's where it's from. It's where it's from. 73 00:04:21.800 --> 00:04:24.279 Oh, I thought he had like I thought someone ran 74 00:04:24.360 --> 00:04:25.560 over his boner or something. 75 00:04:26.560 --> 00:04:29.480 He's like flat side of the road, like Jim Carrey 76 00:04:29.480 --> 00:04:30.240 in the Mask. 77 00:04:30.480 --> 00:04:35.120 Look road Kill. You remember when they used to give 78 00:04:35.160 --> 00:04:36.759 that movie out in cereal boxes. 79 00:04:36.839 --> 00:04:37.040 Fuck? 80 00:04:37.160 --> 00:04:40.439 Yeah they yeah, and they are. They had like Batman 81 00:04:40.519 --> 00:04:41.800 forever in a cereal box. 82 00:04:43.839 --> 00:04:47.399 Wonder. Yeah, used to get free DVDs and fucking cereal. 83 00:04:48.439 --> 00:04:50.439 And then they just stopped. They only put out the 84 00:04:50.480 --> 00:04:51.000 Mask for. 85 00:04:51.040 --> 00:04:53.759 Like two five. I know. That was kind of cool though. 86 00:04:53.839 --> 00:04:55.720 They used to get cool things in your cereal and 87 00:04:55.759 --> 00:04:57.120 nowadays all you get. 88 00:04:56.920 --> 00:05:01.360 Is diabetes a bunch of so. 89 00:05:01.480 --> 00:05:04.839 The flat Woods Monster also known as the Braxton County 90 00:05:04.879 --> 00:05:08.480 Monster or the Phantom of flat Woods or this is 91 00:05:08.519 --> 00:05:11.279 kind of cute. Sometimes they just call him Braxi little 92 00:05:11.279 --> 00:05:12.040 Braxie boy. 93 00:05:12.360 --> 00:05:15.959 Oh he's got a nickname. Did he play what did 94 00:05:16.000 --> 00:05:17.240 he play with the kids. 95 00:05:17.480 --> 00:05:19.360 Yeah, we'll get into it. We'll get into it. He 96 00:05:19.399 --> 00:05:22.879 did give some kids quite a scare. He's an alleged 97 00:05:22.959 --> 00:05:27.319 unidentified extraterrestrial or cryptid reported to be cited in the 98 00:05:27.360 --> 00:05:32.399 town of flat Woods in Braxton County, West Virginia on 99 00:05:32.480 --> 00:05:35.639 September and twelfth, nineteen fifty two, is when they initially 100 00:05:35.800 --> 00:05:38.160 it happened. But this has grown to a bigger story 101 00:05:38.199 --> 00:05:41.399 and obviously, like most weird cryptids, this town uses it 102 00:05:41.439 --> 00:05:44.319 to their advantage, you know, like we talked about, Yeah. 103 00:05:44.279 --> 00:05:46.439 Like you make a tourist money and shit, right. 104 00:05:46.720 --> 00:05:49.199 Yeah, exactly, witness has. 105 00:05:49.439 --> 00:05:52.920 Witnesses have described the monster as being towering and around 106 00:05:52.920 --> 00:05:56.800 seven feet tall, with black body and a dark glowing 107 00:05:56.920 --> 00:06:01.199 face surrounded by a pointed hood, Like shit, so a 108 00:06:01.240 --> 00:06:02.800 lot of yeah. 109 00:06:03.079 --> 00:06:05.360 A black body. Do you mean like he's black? 110 00:06:06.120 --> 00:06:10.160 No, No, he's like there's different Yeah, there's different sightings 111 00:06:10.199 --> 00:06:12.279 of of what he looks like, and we'll get into it. 112 00:06:12.519 --> 00:06:14.639 But the first sign it seems like he his head 113 00:06:14.759 --> 00:06:18.120 was shaped like that of a spade from a card, 114 00:06:18.560 --> 00:06:19.839 like a deck of cards. 115 00:06:19.959 --> 00:06:21.439 Yeah, is that fucking weird? 116 00:06:22.160 --> 00:06:26.480 Weird little but someone with yeah. 117 00:06:26.360 --> 00:06:28.560 Because supposed to be he wore like a metal black 118 00:06:28.720 --> 00:06:30.480 dress and ships. 119 00:06:31.680 --> 00:06:33.360 Is that like armor? And then he just like walking 120 00:06:33.360 --> 00:06:34.680 around spearheading people. 121 00:06:35.000 --> 00:06:35.480 Yeah, and he. 122 00:06:35.439 --> 00:06:38.920 Also supposed to be levitates, but many people describe eyes 123 00:06:39.600 --> 00:06:42.639 shining like in animals in the darkness, which many people 124 00:06:42.720 --> 00:06:46.360 have taken uh to that the creature kind of has 125 00:06:46.399 --> 00:06:49.079 like an owl like head. There is different sightings of this. 126 00:06:49.199 --> 00:06:51.680 We'll get into it, but it's just he's a weird 127 00:06:51.680 --> 00:06:52.240 looking creature. 128 00:06:52.279 --> 00:06:55.079 He levitates. The monster's body allegedly. 129 00:06:54.600 --> 00:06:57.600 Had a series of folds that ripple across his torso 130 00:06:57.920 --> 00:07:00.680 down towards its feet. Some people have said the creature 131 00:07:00.720 --> 00:07:04.959 has long, spindily claw like fingers that lash out like 132 00:07:05.279 --> 00:07:08.040 uh that lash out at people from its branch like. 133 00:07:08.120 --> 00:07:13.839 Arms claws and they like exact like a spring and. 134 00:07:13.800 --> 00:07:15.800 They just go and then come back to you. 135 00:07:16.519 --> 00:07:19.439 Yeah, it is. He's like one of the creepiest looking ones. 136 00:07:19.439 --> 00:07:20.120 He's like Levity. 137 00:07:20.199 --> 00:07:22.839 He's got these long spindily arms and ship and then 138 00:07:22.839 --> 00:07:28.240 the weird shaped head shiny ass eyes. Because and so 139 00:07:28.399 --> 00:07:31.519 it's likely that the creature's color isn't actually black, but 140 00:07:31.560 --> 00:07:34.600 a dark green or brown that gives a colorless look 141 00:07:34.959 --> 00:07:38.759 once removed from a light source. Some witnesses uh to 142 00:07:38.920 --> 00:07:42.360 the monster have added a robotic like dress or or 143 00:07:42.800 --> 00:07:44.800 like kind of a weird Yes, it's a weird metal 144 00:07:44.879 --> 00:07:48.360 dress on its bottom half. It's kind of like, yeah, 145 00:07:48.360 --> 00:07:50.279 it's kind of giving it like a sock the hedgehig 146 00:07:50.879 --> 00:07:55.959 villain vibe, like doctor robotniks around and his little fucking chair. 147 00:07:57.079 --> 00:07:58.319 Maybe that's where she's based. 148 00:07:59.199 --> 00:08:01.120 Yeah, so he's just like the weirdest looking thing. And 149 00:08:01.600 --> 00:08:02.439 we'll get into it later. 150 00:08:02.439 --> 00:08:04.839 But some people describe him as looking like a reptilian esque. 151 00:08:04.839 --> 00:08:09.319 But this is a creepy, fucking dude. He's not from 152 00:08:09.399 --> 00:08:11.839 this world and he just wants to fit in and 153 00:08:12.199 --> 00:08:14.079 he likes wearing dresses, so he would fit in with 154 00:08:14.160 --> 00:08:17.319 Generation Z problem. 155 00:08:17.879 --> 00:08:21.680 So everyone we quick just because you said that, Yeah, 156 00:08:21.800 --> 00:08:24.360 what the fuck is this super straight thing that keeps 157 00:08:24.399 --> 00:08:24.839 coming up on? 158 00:08:25.079 --> 00:08:27.000 Oh, well that guy in there's a guy on TikTok 159 00:08:27.079 --> 00:08:30.319 that made up his own his own gender or nudge. 160 00:08:30.360 --> 00:08:32.360 I think they do classify as gender, but it's only 161 00:08:32.399 --> 00:08:35.200 his own sexual orientation. And now people have caught in 162 00:08:35.240 --> 00:08:37.639 the bandwagon of being like, well, I don't want to 163 00:08:37.919 --> 00:08:41.679 have sexual relationships with a trans woman because I want 164 00:08:41.759 --> 00:08:42.960 a biological woman. 165 00:08:43.120 --> 00:08:45.960 So they kind of made their own. 166 00:08:45.399 --> 00:08:46.279 I'm super straight. 167 00:08:46.559 --> 00:08:49.720 Yeah, because it's just like they're getting all this hate 168 00:08:49.759 --> 00:08:51.799 for saying, hey, I don't want to have sex with 169 00:08:51.879 --> 00:08:54.799 someone who was born a man and transitioned into a woman. 170 00:08:55.039 --> 00:08:57.039 They want a biological woman. And the people are getting 171 00:08:57.039 --> 00:08:59.799 all butt hurt, so they create their own their own thing. 172 00:09:00.200 --> 00:09:02.799 That's like, oh man, that's gonna just stir the pot. 173 00:09:02.879 --> 00:09:07.039 This is gonna I just I just saw one guy today. 174 00:09:07.080 --> 00:09:09.399 It was like, yep, he's like, and I want our 175 00:09:09.440 --> 00:09:11.679 own month that's super straight in September. 176 00:09:12.080 --> 00:09:14.320 And it's like I want to parade as well. 177 00:09:14.519 --> 00:09:16.600 Yeah I saw that too. Yeah, we were talking. 178 00:09:19.120 --> 00:09:20.559 Oh but that's that is just crazy. 179 00:09:20.720 --> 00:09:20.919 Yeah. 180 00:09:21.000 --> 00:09:24.639 So everyone who has the poor luck of running into 181 00:09:24.679 --> 00:09:28.759 the Flatwood Monster had experienced the same physical symptoms to 182 00:09:28.879 --> 00:09:29.679 varying degrees. 183 00:09:30.120 --> 00:09:31.480 Some of them deal with you. 184 00:09:31.440 --> 00:09:35.840 Know, like throw and Noah's irritation, while other people who 185 00:09:35.960 --> 00:09:39.240 were in the vicinity began to vomit and they also 186 00:09:39.320 --> 00:09:40.840 have like they're convulsing too. 187 00:09:40.879 --> 00:09:43.600 So this thing gives you like bad errors wah wah. 188 00:09:43.440 --> 00:09:45.639 And then you start like throwing up and convulsing and 189 00:09:45.679 --> 00:09:46.960 freaking out. 190 00:09:47.480 --> 00:09:51.320 What is that? Like Like an e MP takes away electronics? 191 00:09:51.320 --> 00:09:53.399 What's that? What is that? 192 00:09:53.440 --> 00:09:56.320 There's a there's a tool that I've seen in like movie, 193 00:09:56.360 --> 00:09:58.080 countless movies, and like I think it's real. 194 00:09:58.200 --> 00:10:00.240 Like it's like the. 195 00:09:59.200 --> 00:10:02.000 Sonic wave and then that makes you like throw up. 196 00:10:02.159 --> 00:10:04.360 Oh the brown note where it makes you shit yourself. 197 00:10:04.559 --> 00:10:06.480 There's like a note you can play and then supposed to. 198 00:10:06.480 --> 00:10:11.279 Be but yeah, that's not what I was thinking of. 199 00:10:11.399 --> 00:10:11.840 But whatever. 200 00:10:12.720 --> 00:10:17.240 Yeah, so so like the people feel different type of feelings, 201 00:10:17.240 --> 00:10:20.080 but essentially it's like, you know, they're uncomfortable and they 202 00:10:20.159 --> 00:10:22.600 throw up and they vomit and they convulse. But weeks 203 00:10:22.639 --> 00:10:26.200 after the event, one of the boys in the group 204 00:10:26.639 --> 00:10:29.240 that this is the first kind of sighting. Gene Lemon 205 00:10:29.399 --> 00:10:32.360 was still unable to swallow liquids because of the irritation. 206 00:10:32.840 --> 00:10:35.799 A doctor who examined the group said that their ailments 207 00:10:35.799 --> 00:10:41.120 were similar to those suffered by soldiers who encountered Mustard Gash. 208 00:10:42.279 --> 00:10:46.759 Yeah, this weird ass fucking alien. He's a weird guy. 209 00:10:46.879 --> 00:10:51.000 He's from the fleetwoods Man. He's got a long, spinnily claws. 210 00:10:51.360 --> 00:10:53.399 He makes you feel like you have to vomit. 211 00:10:54.200 --> 00:10:55.519 He's in the he's in the woods. 212 00:10:55.559 --> 00:10:57.519 Maybe his diet was just really bad and he's dropping 213 00:10:57.600 --> 00:11:01.399 stink bombs like NonStop. It's like if you put me 214 00:11:01.399 --> 00:11:03.200 out in the woods for two months, It's like, that's 215 00:11:03.200 --> 00:11:05.600 gotta be mustard gas. I'm like, no, somebody just give 216 00:11:05.639 --> 00:11:06.639 me some fucking bread. 217 00:11:06.720 --> 00:11:06.960 Yeah. 218 00:11:06.960 --> 00:11:08.960 If if Billy got dropped out in the woods for 219 00:11:09.039 --> 00:11:11.759 like over a couple months, he would become a new cryptid. 220 00:11:12.159 --> 00:11:16.320 It's the lanky man of the Cambridge fucking city and 221 00:11:16.399 --> 00:11:18.240 he fucking reeks. 222 00:11:18.039 --> 00:11:21.200 He smells. All he does is you. 223 00:11:21.200 --> 00:11:24.679 You you find like old cheese and a dumpster, and 224 00:11:24.720 --> 00:11:26.840 you just keep eating cheese. And then it's like a 225 00:11:26.879 --> 00:11:30.120 cartoon where all you see is like greens, like smoke 226 00:11:30.159 --> 00:11:32.799 coming out of the woods, and it's just all from your. 227 00:11:32.720 --> 00:11:33.559 Gas, from your. 228 00:11:35.279 --> 00:11:38.840 Not rotten cheese, not alone. I don't even want to 229 00:11:38.840 --> 00:11:39.919 know what that would do. 230 00:11:40.240 --> 00:11:42.159 It's find old pizza and shit. And then then he 231 00:11:42.279 --> 00:11:43.720 used old pizza farts. 232 00:11:45.399 --> 00:11:45.799 All right. 233 00:11:45.879 --> 00:11:48.399 So a doctor also knows that the effects are the 234 00:11:48.440 --> 00:11:51.840 same as people who suffer from hysteria, but that claim 235 00:11:51.919 --> 00:11:56.080 somehow sounds more ridiculous than the group of people actually 236 00:11:56.080 --> 00:11:59.679 seeing a horror a horrific owl creature in the woods, 237 00:11:59.679 --> 00:12:02.440 because he's like, well, maybe they're just suffering from hysteria. 238 00:12:02.639 --> 00:12:06.559 You know, many alien abductees have a similar symptoms to 239 00:12:06.559 --> 00:12:09.440 the people who saw the flatwood monsters, which points towards 240 00:12:09.480 --> 00:12:14.200 the creature either being from another planet or maybe interdimensional. 241 00:12:15.759 --> 00:12:17.879 So we'll get to the story in the background of 242 00:12:18.000 --> 00:12:21.919 where the how he appears in in folklore and everything. 243 00:12:21.960 --> 00:12:25.200 Okay, I want to know who did anybody talk to him? Like, 244 00:12:25.240 --> 00:12:28.039 how would you know anything of where he came from? 245 00:12:28.200 --> 00:12:29.639 Well, it's just a guess, that's it. 246 00:12:29.639 --> 00:12:32.559 It's a guess, straight guess. It's like this guy, it's 247 00:12:32.600 --> 00:12:35.360 it's got to be from that one time. 248 00:12:36.360 --> 00:12:40.399 So much of that tambucha snap snap snap. 249 00:12:40.960 --> 00:12:42.919 I wonder what that's wonder what that tastes like. 250 00:12:43.240 --> 00:12:45.759 It tastes like old vegetables. I don't know how to 251 00:12:45.799 --> 00:12:47.200 describe it. It's a weird. 252 00:12:47.519 --> 00:12:50.799 It's it's uh, some of them smell like fucking vinegar 253 00:12:50.840 --> 00:12:53.679 and ship and it's just, yeah, I don't think you 254 00:12:53.679 --> 00:12:54.120 would like. 255 00:12:54.080 --> 00:12:59.840 It, to be honest, weird. It's fermented fucking vegetables, and 256 00:13:00.039 --> 00:13:01.039 all right, it will fruits. 257 00:13:01.200 --> 00:13:07.039 I drink fermented by yeah beer, that's true. 258 00:13:07.600 --> 00:13:10.279 And for all listeners, Yes, And it is twelve am 259 00:13:10.399 --> 00:13:13.360 on a fucking Sunday and Billy's got beer and I had. 260 00:13:13.279 --> 00:13:15.960 A shot of whiskey, and you know we never. 261 00:13:17.320 --> 00:13:18.000 Dog you got it? 262 00:13:18.080 --> 00:13:19.600 Yeah, I know, because one day the doctor is going 263 00:13:19.679 --> 00:13:22.039 to be like, your livers fucked. You can't drink anymore, 264 00:13:22.080 --> 00:13:23.840 and then I'll have to just drink kamboocha all day 265 00:13:23.840 --> 00:13:25.080 because that's technically a brew. 266 00:13:25.679 --> 00:13:27.519 So I gotta keep it strange with the brew. 267 00:13:27.679 --> 00:13:29.440 But my liver will never die. 268 00:13:29.480 --> 00:13:35.320 It's like it's like we're now, we know what I'm doing, 269 00:13:35.440 --> 00:13:37.559 do it, and it will it will survive with me. 270 00:13:39.120 --> 00:13:40.759 Oh you'll be left. Is just a liver. 271 00:13:42.919 --> 00:13:43.639 So strong. 272 00:13:45.000 --> 00:13:49.200 So stories of the Flatwood Monster, they know that a 273 00:13:49.320 --> 00:13:52.679 fireball or mete you're like object happened right before it 274 00:13:52.759 --> 00:13:56.399 started to appear. And the first report in the first 275 00:13:56.720 --> 00:14:00.360 reported appearance of the Flatwood Monsters, the boys who saw 276 00:14:00.399 --> 00:14:03.200 the creature and noted that a foul odor and heavy 277 00:14:03.399 --> 00:14:05.440 mist seemed to emanate from the monster. 278 00:14:05.639 --> 00:14:06.600 So he is stinky. 279 00:14:06.960 --> 00:14:08.639 So it says these boys are like playing out in 280 00:14:08.720 --> 00:14:11.799 the fucking woods, and you know, they're like sword fighting 281 00:14:11.879 --> 00:14:14.399 with sticks and having fun together and you know, and 282 00:14:14.480 --> 00:14:16.879 then they see a meteor like thing crash and I 283 00:14:16.919 --> 00:14:18.960 think they kind of go towards it, and then this 284 00:14:19.120 --> 00:14:21.960 motherfucker starts levitating towards them and then they get sick 285 00:14:22.039 --> 00:14:25.519 and all this shit. So the two boys were allegedly 286 00:14:25.639 --> 00:14:28.360 sprayed in the face by the smoke that seemed to 287 00:14:28.399 --> 00:14:31.120 come from within the folds of the monster's body. 288 00:14:32.000 --> 00:14:36.960 It's like they get all like, say, they're like spraying 289 00:14:37.039 --> 00:14:40.200 the face, like what the fuck? And then he goes. 290 00:14:42.519 --> 00:14:45.159 And he's talking to them, but he's like, oh, he says, 291 00:14:45.240 --> 00:14:48.000 going on, and then all he said is, oh, I farted. 292 00:14:48.039 --> 00:14:48.320 Sorry. 293 00:14:48.600 --> 00:14:49.519 What if? What if? 294 00:14:50.279 --> 00:14:50.679 What if? 295 00:14:51.679 --> 00:14:53.720 What if he was so fat that he had a 296 00:14:53.759 --> 00:14:57.320 bunch of skunks in between the folds of fat, so 297 00:14:57.440 --> 00:15:00.440 it just looked and when he squeezed them, they're there's 298 00:15:00.600 --> 00:15:02.600 the spray or. 299 00:15:02.639 --> 00:15:04.960 That his is maybe his mechanism. 300 00:15:05.039 --> 00:15:07.000 It could be a female, but maybe that's his like 301 00:15:07.039 --> 00:15:09.879 defense mechanism where he does have things like a skunk 302 00:15:10.200 --> 00:15:11.639 and if you gets too close to them, he like 303 00:15:11.720 --> 00:15:12.919 sprays you with a foul. 304 00:15:12.759 --> 00:15:15.480 Odor or because who knows what this thing could be. 305 00:15:15.679 --> 00:15:17.559 It could be like, you know, fucking it could be 306 00:15:17.600 --> 00:15:19.720 like mustard gas type of ship because it said that 307 00:15:19.840 --> 00:15:23.080 it kind of was similar to that of soldiers being 308 00:15:23.120 --> 00:15:25.159 exposed to it, so it's like some chemical gas. 309 00:15:25.519 --> 00:15:28.639 These guys like this is just one of the first 310 00:15:28.720 --> 00:15:29.480 homeless guys. 311 00:15:29.759 --> 00:15:29.960 Yeah. 312 00:15:30.080 --> 00:15:32.759 Yeah, he's just wearing a hood and a cloak and 313 00:15:32.799 --> 00:15:34.679 ship and he's like, it keeps me warm at night. 314 00:15:35.000 --> 00:15:37.159 How do you not sleep under a And you see 315 00:15:37.240 --> 00:15:39.360 these long branch like arms. This is how I get 316 00:15:39.440 --> 00:15:42.240 the fruit down from the but the tree I get. 317 00:15:42.399 --> 00:15:45.600 Like they are they are branches. The just a bunch 318 00:15:45.639 --> 00:15:50.120 of branches to his arms. He's got the long stick hands. Yeah, 319 00:15:50.200 --> 00:15:51.039 so that's that's. 320 00:15:50.919 --> 00:15:52.559 Super weird to me that they like that. 321 00:15:52.799 --> 00:15:56.919 It releases some or like stinky, stinky gas. But as 322 00:15:56.960 --> 00:15:59.519 the night went on and the mist grew into a 323 00:15:59.559 --> 00:16:03.480 heavy fun that settled across the countryside. After two boys 324 00:16:03.519 --> 00:16:05.679 were sprayed with the mist and made it home, they 325 00:16:05.799 --> 00:16:08.720 noticed that their faces were covered with an oily residue. 326 00:16:09.759 --> 00:16:15.600 Creepy. They just slapped each other with pizza pizza face. 327 00:16:16.360 --> 00:16:16.600 Yeah. 328 00:16:17.080 --> 00:16:20.600 Mean, their throat swelled up so much that they couldn't 329 00:16:20.600 --> 00:16:22.440 even drink liquids for two weeks, which. 330 00:16:22.360 --> 00:16:23.200 Is fucking weird. 331 00:16:23.759 --> 00:16:26.080 Even like even if maybe like this is a stereo 332 00:16:26.159 --> 00:16:29.080 or something happened, What the fuck happened to their faces? 333 00:16:29.559 --> 00:16:32.240 You know what I mean? It was muster, your guess, 334 00:16:33.000 --> 00:16:37.720 it's Hitler's step brother just signing in the woods. In 335 00:16:37.759 --> 00:16:39.759 the fifties, it was Hitler. 336 00:16:40.840 --> 00:16:42.720 He was actually just hiding in the woods and he 337 00:16:42.799 --> 00:16:45.639 cantrayed this weird contraption so people didn't recognize him. 338 00:16:45.960 --> 00:16:47.519 And now he's a flatwood Monster. 339 00:16:47.720 --> 00:16:50.639 It could be. It's just as just as reasonable as 340 00:16:50.679 --> 00:16:51.519 anything else we saw. 341 00:16:52.120 --> 00:16:54.960 So the Flatwood Monster first entered into the public consciousness 342 00:16:55.039 --> 00:16:58.039 in nineteen fifty two after a group of children aged 343 00:16:58.080 --> 00:17:01.440 ten to seventeen. That's a big age gap. Why is 344 00:17:01.480 --> 00:17:03.320 a seventeen year old hanging out with a ten year 345 00:17:03.360 --> 00:17:08.039 old is beyond me. But that includes all their brothers too. 346 00:17:08.359 --> 00:17:11.880 Edward and Fred May chased a ball of fire that 347 00:17:12.000 --> 00:17:14.400 fell from the sky into the hills of Braxton County. 348 00:17:14.680 --> 00:17:16.799 They alleged followed the ball of fire. 349 00:17:16.720 --> 00:17:20.319 Or UFO into the hills and ran into the creature 350 00:17:20.440 --> 00:17:23.160 before high tailing it out of there, so they can 351 00:17:23.319 --> 00:17:24.000 kind of explain that. 352 00:17:24.079 --> 00:17:25.720 But that's how this all started. 353 00:17:25.759 --> 00:17:29.240 When a local sheriff began to investigate the sightings, he 354 00:17:29.359 --> 00:17:31.559 learned that there had been rumors and sightings of the 355 00:17:31.640 --> 00:17:34.519 creature prior to the sightings by the May children. 356 00:17:35.319 --> 00:17:38.359 So he's like, there's something fishy is going on here. 357 00:17:38.559 --> 00:17:40.680 Now I gotta get to the bottom of it because 358 00:17:41.240 --> 00:17:42.359 I got nothing else to do. 359 00:17:43.400 --> 00:17:45.680 So then they get the fuck out of there, and 360 00:17:45.720 --> 00:17:47.799 the investigator he starts to investigate. He's like, what the 361 00:17:47.799 --> 00:17:50.039 fuck's going on in my city? I'm sick of my 362 00:17:50.160 --> 00:17:52.759 little town. I'm sick of it's deal with the homeless guys. 363 00:17:52.759 --> 00:17:55.759 I want something more exciting, So I'm gonna start doving 364 00:17:55.799 --> 00:17:57.319 into the Flatwood Monster. 365 00:17:57.359 --> 00:18:00.680 See where this fucker's at. So it could be that, yeah, 366 00:18:00.680 --> 00:18:01.319 it could be at. 367 00:18:01.279 --> 00:18:04.920 The Flatwood Monster was actually an extraterrestrial that landed in 368 00:18:04.960 --> 00:18:06.640 an area to do some research. 369 00:18:07.160 --> 00:18:09.480 He's like, I'm gonna lose some research in the forest. 370 00:18:10.000 --> 00:18:12.319 He got my old friend Bigfoot that I think he's 371 00:18:12.359 --> 00:18:14.680 walking around here or somewhere somewhere. 372 00:18:15.359 --> 00:18:16.079 He's elusive. 373 00:18:16.200 --> 00:18:18.359 Baby, he was looking for Bigfoot. Maybe this guy lost 374 00:18:18.559 --> 00:18:21.000 out one of his pets. And then he's like shows 375 00:18:21.079 --> 00:18:23.400 up and he's like, where is that fucker? And he's 376 00:18:23.440 --> 00:18:28.400 just like randomly watering down to Arkansas. He's like, I 377 00:18:28.519 --> 00:18:30.880 smell cousin fucking down there. It sounds lot of fun. 378 00:18:31.240 --> 00:18:34.000 And then he loses him in Arkansas, and then it becomes. 379 00:18:33.880 --> 00:18:36.079 Why are you guys smoking in the cars with your 380 00:18:36.119 --> 00:18:38.640 babies literally. 381 00:18:39.079 --> 00:18:42.599 So, or it could be an introdudential cryptid similar to 382 00:18:42.680 --> 00:18:47.400 that of sasquatch. Either way, there's something in Braxton County, 383 00:18:47.519 --> 00:18:50.920 West Virginia that draws the creature to its dark woods. 384 00:18:51.039 --> 00:18:51.720 Something's going on. 385 00:18:51.799 --> 00:18:53.640 It's like, as I said, maybe he lost his pet, 386 00:18:54.119 --> 00:18:56.759 or there's something in the forest that he needed for 387 00:18:57.359 --> 00:18:58.480 whatever fucking reason. 388 00:18:59.119 --> 00:18:59.960 I don't. 389 00:19:00.119 --> 00:19:02.440 I don't think he needed anything in there. I think 390 00:19:02.559 --> 00:19:05.200 he was just he was like too many people fucking. 391 00:19:06.319 --> 00:19:08.799 They flown away because he just levitated. 392 00:19:08.880 --> 00:19:12.440 He's like super Also in his interview, he's like, I'm 393 00:19:12.480 --> 00:19:16.960 really claustrophobic and I have a lot of social anxiety. 394 00:19:17.319 --> 00:19:17.519 Yeah. 395 00:19:17.599 --> 00:19:18.119 Yeah, yeah. 396 00:19:18.799 --> 00:19:21.680 So after a few hours after the May Brothers and 397 00:19:21.759 --> 00:19:24.440 their friends ran to the Creature of the Woods, another 398 00:19:24.599 --> 00:19:28.839 group also had an encounter with the flat Woods Monster. Allegedly, 399 00:19:29.000 --> 00:19:32.799 a couple and their infant were driving down the highway 400 00:19:33.359 --> 00:19:37.319 and smoking in their cars like they're from Arkansas, when, yeah, 401 00:19:37.359 --> 00:19:39.440