Speaker 1: Live. This is pet Life Radio. Let's Talk pets.
Speaker 2: Hello, Fila and friends and cat levers. Welcome to Cata Tude.
I'm your show host, Michelle bern and today we have
yet another cat book because I love cats and I'm
a voracious reader, and I keep putting these amazing cat
books to share with you. And this story is just incredible.
The author just told such an amazing story. So stay tuned,
we'll be right back.
Speaker 3: You know the expression cats have nine lives, Well, what
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give them ten dot Org.
Speaker 4: Let's talk pets on Cetlife Radio dot com.
Speaker 2: Welcome back everyone. I would like to welcome Josephine Spence.
She is the author of A Cat's Tail. Welcome Josephine.
Speaker 5: Hello everybody, thank you for having me here.
Speaker 2: I'm very happy to have you on. So a Cat's
Tail is about your cat, on Kyo. It's a Japanese name.
But it's interesting how you got that name because it's
told in the book. But hope well might get to that.
Maybe not, we'll see. But the Cat's tell is told
in on Kio's own voice, which you know adds a
lot of warm personality. It makes it it's interesting. Why
did you take it from her voice and rather than
your perspective?
Speaker 5: Sure, let me answer that. First of all, this is
my fourth published book. I've written books before, but when
I start to be honest, when I decided to write
the book about on Kio, I started the book with
my voice, and as I was writing it, it just
didn't do her story justice. And I thought to myself,
Onkle had always been a very vocal cat. She would
have loved to tell the story in her own voice.
And when she tells the story, it's going to be
more relatable. So that's when I came up with the idea, Hey,
let's write it in her voice as if she could talk.
After all, she's almost a human to me. And that's why.
And when I wrote first chapter and I said to myself, no,
this book has to be different. Let the cat be
the speaker, because she was intelligent. She's for a wisdom
and so she could tell on the story. That's how
I changed the gear and rewrote the first chapter starting
with a voice, and that's the story.
Speaker 2: Okay, thanks. You know I've had five cats. Right now,
I have three, and in my mind, they all have
a certain voice. They each have distinctive personalities. And I
grew up with dogs, and their personalities are you can
tell a little bit easier than cats. Cats take a
little bit of time. And I was kind of tricked
because my first cat, Dennis, is part main coon and
so they're known as the dog of cats, so his personality,
I thought all cats were like that, and then Molly
came along and I realized, no, they're not, and neither
is their sister Charlotte. So Auncio has characteristics in the
book that come across as play and curious and very intellectual.
How much of those traits are actually on Kio and
how many were embellished a little bit?
Speaker 5: Sure? I have to say that the Hope book really
is based on real stories that I head her for
nine nearly nineteen years, and we spent almost every day together,
and the stories about her is endless. But I've consciously
only picked stories that are really funny in my mind
and humorous. So I started writing about, you know, the
day when she was born. That part of it is
hearsay from the pet store that we rescue her from,
so exactly how she was born and how she was
transported from an old lady's house to the pet store.
That is based on hearsay because I wasn't there right,
But from the day we met on Kill and adopted her,
the rest of the stories are true. Of course, when
she died, there's a chapter that she was waiting for
me at the Rainbow Bridge that clearly is from my imagination,
because I truly believe a cat had nine lives after
this life, she's waiting for me to come back. So
I would say, from chapter one to chapter twenty, it's
all true story, truly what happened. The cat is intelligent,
there's no to worry about it. On Kile has so
many interesting personalities. In fact, people that know her, my
faithful vet doctor John say that declare Uncle as the
most vocal cat. She talks a lot. She's a thirty
percent man con and there's a twenty five percent of
her being Siamese.
Speaker 2: Let me ask this, what made you decide that you
have to write a book about on Kile. What was
there a single memory or moment that just triggered it.
Speaker 5: Yes, yes, I have to confess. When my first horse
passed away, my first horse being Freckles, I was devastated
and I wrote a book about him, but I was
too shy to partlish it because I think I thought
to myself, people think I'm crazy and no human should
love an animal as much as that. So I kind
of like regret that I did not publish my book
about my first pet. So the moment I held on
killing my arm, Okay, I'm not going to cry, she
passed away in my arms. And the very last moment
she really looked at me, her eyes was direct, in
direct contact with me. I felt that she told me,
you have to tell my story. Mommy, Mama, Joe, I
love you, you have to tell my story. And that's when
I decided, Yes. The day after we cremated her, I
have to sit down and write her story because she
wanted to be remembered. And the moment she told me
was when she took her last breath. That that is
my gut feel. She directly told me, don't forget about me,
even though I'm gone, I don't love you any less,
don't forget me. So the only way I could remember
her is by writing down her stories. That's the moment
I decided that the story needs to be told.
Speaker 2: Well again, it's a beautiful story, and I'm sorry for
your loss. It's always so sad when our fur babes
leave us and they're never on this earth as long
as we want them to be.
Speaker 5: Yeah, then again, someone told me nineteen years is a bonus.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, And I haven't had a cat pass yet
and my oldest one is seventeen. But I had two
dogs prior and they both lived to be like like
fourteen seven months in like fifteen and years and fourteen
years seven months for what was fifteen years and like
three months. Sometimes that's a bonus for their size too,
So we just have to be grateful for the time
we have with them. And it's so I think it's
so cool, that kind of magical that she looked at
you and you got that message from her, because I
do truly believe we get messages. This is going to
sound crazy to some people, but from the universe, sometimes
from our creatures. We just get these messages and I've
had these experiences that's not totally coutrelated, but I've just
had things that pop into my head and go, why
after all these years when I was trying to figure
this out, this came to me just now. So the
fact that you got the message to write the book
from Anko as she was passing, I think is just amazing. Yep,
let's talk about the bond between cats and their yemen.
So you know, as we're some cat toud listeners were
nuts about cats, and with your book, there are so
many small magical moments, especially you know, living with the
cats so special which have Ancia's everyday miracles stands out
to you most.
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's a great question. I don't know whether I
told you that I did have cancer back in during
the pandemic twenty twenty one, I was diagnosed with Evans
and domeitrium cancer and I knew Uncle knew about it
because what she used to do is when I'm lying
down my bed in great pain, she would come next
to my bed. She had a little bit next to
my bed like most people do, right, and she will
quietly sit next to me with her front paws cross,
just like sphinx.
Speaker 3: Right.
Speaker 5: She would sit there and not staring at me, but
keeping me company. And that's a miracle way of expressing
her love. Her love doesn't need to be loud, she
doesn't have to say a lot, she doesn't have to mail.
If you use present tense story, I still believe she's around.
She did not have to say she loved me. The
fact that she knew that I was suffering. I was
in great pain, and she would sit next to me
and with her front two paws cross just directly across,
just like a person would cross our front to arms,
and she sit next to me and kept me company
without saying a word. And there's one miracles that I
treasure every day. I think she could smell cancers. She
knew I was sick, and her intuition is so accurate.
Her quiet appearance, her sitting close to me, her nudging
her nose at me, and it's her way of saying, hey,
we can get through this cancer thing together. And she did.
And that stands out the most with me.
Speaker 2: To be honest, I'm sorry you have to deal with that. Honest,
I hope you're in better help.
Speaker 5: Yes, I'm in remission now, I'm in second year of remission,
so I'm blessed.
Speaker 2: That's wonderful news. Cats are always they're hard to understand,
but they're people that get cats are insanely in love
with them. Right. Why do you think cats, even though
they're very subtle, you know, they're not like a dog
that jumps out. And I keep going to dogs because
most people have dogs or cats are both. Dogs are
very you know, you see their emotion whatever. Cats once
they get past the kitten stage, are more stoic creatures.
Why do you think they you know? And she ates
such a powerful love from their humans.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 5: To be honest, though, I'm so allergic to cat and
I was elected to Earth, so I wouldn't say that
I'm totally I did not fall in love with her
right at the beginning. She was my daughter's cat. That's
confession number one. But because uncle loved me in a
very regal is the word I can I can use.
She's very elegant. She's not demanding in the sense she
doesn't always buck me for attention. But when she chose
to be with me, she really did spend time with me.
It's like a sacred trust. You know, you feel that
this little animal has so much trust in me. And
she did not have to say much, she did not
have to mel much or shout. She would just you know,
quietly come nudging next to me and just say, hey,
I want to cuddle. And her love to me is
the strongest emotional connection. It's it's almost like unspoken kind
of love. It's just like when you're looking at her.
She she's very knowing, she's very intelligent. She is almost perfectly,
very intuitive when I'm sad, When I was, you know,
going through tough time, she knew it before everybody. So
her love to me is unconditional provided I feed her,
I guess.
Speaker 2: But there's always something right. They are very loyal to
the hand that feeds them. We're almost at a break,
but before we get there, what would you say is
one of the lessons that on Gar taught you, as
far as like a life lesson.
Speaker 5: You're gonna laugh when I answer this question. The best
thing that she ever taught me is to rest, sleep,
nap and sleep, because that's what I learned from her.
I was a very fast going, high power executive. I
didn't know how to slow down. But when I had
time and spend my time with Ankle, I learned that
life is not about dashing around three hundred miles an hour.
You need to sit back and enjoy your cat, or
your dog, or your parakeet whatever. She taught me how
to rest, and that is the biggest and most valuable
lesson I ever learned from kill. She told me how
to rest, like you know, im pressing.
Speaker 2: Hey, the more I read online about how sleep is
like one of the top things you need to make
sure you get enough of, so cats definitely have something
They've gotten that right well.
Speaker 5: According to on Kyle, nep is a very important job.
Speaker 2: You've got to know how to do it well exactly. Well,
we're going to take a short break and we'll be
right back.
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started to go down. Then I took him into the
vet to him and checked out, and there was no
signs at all inside.
Speaker 1: My cat had issues that development in the height and
three months later my ven Airing said this, go ahead
and remove the eye.
Speaker 8: I heard the carnivor on advertising, so I said, you
know what, I'm going to order this product. They did
the procedure, they did all the death and they said,
I don't know what you did.
Speaker 5: This product they had, I.
Speaker 8: I've got a labrador. You could hardly lift yourself up
off the floor. The treatment was chemotherapy. That's when I
said this could be the ticket. About three weeks you
could tell she was very alert. She was going to
buy my lock and she is just like crime again.
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Speaker 1: Let's talk about Let's done, pet talk about radio headline Radio.
Speaker 6: Pet Life Radio dot com.
Speaker 2: Welcome back everyone. We are talking with Josephine Spence, the
author of a Cat's Tale, which is about her cat
uncle and not just about her cat, but what she
learned from her cat, what her cat taught her. And
we talked about some of the book in the beginning
of the show. Now we're going to talk about, you know,
continuing your cat's love because the past there's a passage
about feeling Onkio's presence even after she passed on. That
is really moving. How did you approach writing that and
you know, a way that felt honest and respectful and
true to the story.
Speaker 5: Yeah, Michelle, I truly believe that you cannot make grief pretty.
There's nothing pretty pet lost grief. I did not make
it pretty. I cried when I had to cry. I
wrote it the way it came. Row very inconveny. Sometime
I'll be crying in the middle of petting a traffic jam,
and I would cry in the middle of shopping. You know,
some hid the feelings overwhelming. I didn't make it pretty.
I wrote it the way. It was one of her
stories that when I was driving to my yoga and
there's a time in front of me, it has a
cat decoration on the windscreen wiper, and I say, oh,
my goodness, auncle is sending me message after she passed.
So I wrote it the way I saw it. It's
about flickers of comfort. You know, you just know that
even your cat had passed, she came back to check
on me, and I felt her presence. People might say
I'm crazy, but I sometimes I thought I heard her.
Sometimes I felt that the paint is just too much.
It almost hurted to breathe after you lose a cat,
especially one that's been with you for nineteen years. I
can hope that by being able to feel her, it
turns my sorrow into hope. I truly believe she's going
to come back to me another eight times, because she
did nine lives right.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 5: Yeah. I wrote it the way it came, and my
book is conversational. I wrote it the way exactly how
I felt it.
Speaker 2: I like that style of writing. That's my favorite. Let's
talk more about grief. Some people have said when they've
lost their fur babes that you know, over time the
grief has eased up a bit. I lost one of
my fur babes five years ago, one twenty years ago.
Those were both dogs. The two cats that we lost
were outdoor cats that we took care of, so there
wasn't quite the same as they either. We didn't have
them as long, maybe four years, five years, but they
were outdoor because they were feral. So I've had more
of that experience of grief with losing dogs. Although I'm
a little scared because Dennis is getting up there, although
he's more robust than his younger sisters. So what would
you say if people have said grief softens, how has
that been true for you?
Speaker 5: No? No, I don't think grief will ever be softened.
It might become quieter, right, So, for example, the first
week after she passed, I literally could not function. I
cried for a little thing like I find a piece
of fur on my sweater. I found her snot on
the wall. You know, it's just not Yeah, she used
to sneeze a lot.
Speaker 2: Oh wow, think gets flooding noses.
Speaker 5: So I know, I think in the beginning that I
would say the grief, the pain was very sharp. It's
almost take your breath away when you think of her.
You stop, and then your tears would just slud it out,
you know. So I would say a few months later
it becomes softer. It's almost like a tender bruise. Right,
it hasn't gone away, but when you press it still hurt.
I can't say this will go away because I truly
live on Kire so much I think she'll be with
me until I see her again. I don't think grief
has a timeline. There isn't such a thing that by
month too, you're gonna feel better. My month three, you're
gonna forget about your cat. No, that's not gonna work
because grief. Grief is basically love that has no where
to lend, and I have no way to lend is
love I have for her, and I'm not going to
adopt another cat. I'm not ready. I have no way
to give away my love from Onkio to anyone at
the moment. So I grieve. I grieve every day. It's
not really easier. I have not seen or touch of
cat since her passing. I cannot bring myself to do that.
Speaker 2: It's interesting some people need to adopt another, you know,
pet right away. That was the case with my first one.
With my it's different because I had cats already and
because of lifestyle changes that kept me from adopting another dog.
Although I'm very tempted, But I know some people just
can't bear to go through that grief again. How do
you help? This book supports readers that are navigating the
loss of their own feline.
Speaker 5: Yeah, my readers. First of all, they have to learn
pet grief is true, is genuine, It's not a pretend feeling.
It is there. Give yourself the permission to feel everything.
When you read my book. You can laugh, you can cry,
you can feel the love you have gratitude that you
have the chance to have with your pet. I want
my reader to know that their feelings and emotions are validated.
There's no such thing as oh, it's only a cat,
you'll get over it. No, don't let people tell you that.
And to be honest, I cry more when aunt you
pass away than my mother who passed away two years ago.
I truly did. They're part of family, so you are
not alone. If you're sad and crying over your pet.
That grief is very pure, it's very simple. It's the
echo of the love that you had with your pet,
and it's deep, and it's worth celebrating. And don't deny
yourself that. Don't deny yourself to think of your pet,
to laugh, to cry. All those emotions are validated.
Speaker 2: Yes, and healthy to express.
Speaker 5: Totally, totally. Psychology will say you need a grief.
Speaker 1: You do.
Speaker 2: You do like you said in your way, in your timeline,
and I don't think the beings that leave us, whether
they're two lagged or four lagged, the grief, it never
goes away. It might get for some of us, it might,
you know, get a little quieter, but it's there. Sometimes
it comes up and weird place times, and I've experienced that,
I've heard other people experience it. But it's yeah, it's
never quite gone. Josephine, you also told some really cute,
you know, cute little story or on Kio. Well, you
told the stories, but in unki bo voice, So I say,
an Kio told us some stories about some interesting things.
What was one of your favorites? Okay, funniest, the funniest story.
Speaker 5: I think the funniest story about on Kio is her
love for Christmas trees, Christmas decoration, her relationship with my husband.
In the book, we call him Dada because that's what
my daughter to call my husband Dada. So I imagine
Ankle would call my husband Dada too. They have this
very complex love hate relationship. On Kle loved Christmas. She
would die under the Christmas tree if she had a choice.
Every year, when my husband lights up the Christmas tree,
on Kile would be the first one to go underneath it,
thinking it's some sort of spy.
Speaker 6: You know.
Speaker 5: The Christmas when my husband decided to put a second
tree on his desk, he put out the most expensive
family German hand blown nutcracker ornament. Unkle jumped on it.
When everybody went to bed, Oh my god, the whole
house was like a Third World war zone. My husband
went berserk on Kile was scolded. She was hiding the
corner because she just broke. Basically, she broke Klara's lake
and crushed Prince Nutcracker's nut and poked out you know,
Drossamaya's second eye. And the damage was quite intense on
the decoration. That almost spoiled out Christmas. But in the
sense what I look back, it was hilarious. It was funny.
It was the funniest thing she ever did with jumping
on the Christmas tree, the second Christmas tree on my
husband's desk. And I'm sure both uncle and my husband
hated each other that moment.
Speaker 2: That is funny. And I have to say, and it's
tragic in a sense because she destroyed family heirlooms and
those you know, they're meaningful. But I have to say
that becoming a pet parent, and I did that. I
started years ago. I had you know, pets is a child.
But this when I started becoming a pet parent, I
really learned the value of things versus furbabes.
Speaker 5: Yep, yep, They're never wrong, Michelle. Kats are never wrong.
They're always right right.
Speaker 2: The shoe, the phone, I mean, my first one chewed
up everything. It was incredible. What's the most important?
Speaker 4: You know?
Speaker 2: Okay, all right, I have to buy another pair of
shoes or yes, it was an heirloom. But you know,
you can't take it with you. So my dog doesn't
know that, or my cat doesn't know that. You're not
supposed to claw the everything they want, and they want
a claw, even if you have seventeen or more, you know,
cat trees or you know, things for them to use.
I can't think of the word right now, but you
guys know.
Speaker 5: Yeah, your possession you can't take with you. So what
your cat broke it by another one?
Speaker 2: So Josephine, if UNKI can give listeners one piece of wisdom,
what do you think she would share?
Speaker 5: You know what? She'll probably wink eyes and sit, nap often,
eat well, love unconditionally. That's what she would say. And
always get her way. She must get her Fila mignon
because she loves it. She would tell people to rest
and eat well. I think those are the two key
messages that she would give you.
Speaker 2: Okay, kind of like take care of yourself. I like that, yep, selfless.
So you have a cat lobbing audience listening. What message
do you hope listeners get from reading your book.
Speaker 5: I'm hoping to get the center mix of messages here
of mainly comfort from your pet, joy and great memories.
They should always feel that there's nothing wrong with, you know,
taking in the afternoon away from your laptop from work,
put your phone away, and coll up with your cat
in your chest. There's nothing wrong with that. And because
when they're gone, you're going to miss that. And there's
nothing wrong having your cat waking you up at three
am and ask for breakfast. It's something magical. I will
cut my right arm, I will give you my kidneys
just to have her waiting yet one more time. Honestly, Michelle,
I miss this cat so much. She was my alarm
clock for nineteen years.
Speaker 2: There's no words. You can't explain it. But it's wonderful
that you wrote this book. To keep her memory alive. Yes, okay,
So where can our listeners find your book? And do
you think Uncle has any more tales left to tell?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 5: Yeah, that's a great question. Let me answer the first
question first. You can get this book from Amazon. It's
out there, and also it is recorded by a professional
voice actor. Her name happened to be Kitty Kitty j
And the audiobooks is available about on one hundred plus
distribution channels, from Spotify to Audible books Now it's everywhere
Apple and Google. You can get the book the audiobook
and it's also available in kindle as well. So if
you want paper book, you get it from Amazon. You
go to Amazon, type in the books by Josephine Spence.
My books will pop up. And that's how easy it is.
Speaker 2: Okay, thank you.
Speaker 5: I also donated the audiobooks to library as well. If
you prefer not to buy the book and listen for
you can't get it from a library namely Libby and Hoopler.
In your local library, you'll find the book too.
Speaker 2: Okay, thank you. And any more k Tales on the Horizon.
Speaker 5: Michelle, Yes, yes, and yes on Kio had nine lives.
In fact, I started writing part two of her story.
Of course, when she passed away, the second book will
become fictional rather than real story. I had imagined that
she came back to me as a completely different cat,
and on Kill's story is never ending. And I have
started my fifth book about her returning to me because
I'm not able to get over losing her, to feel
like the only way that I can connect to her
is keep writing about her. That's my therapy. So yes,
there's a part two of onkile story, maybe part three,
part four as well. So here we go. As I said,
the name Onkile means echo, and her love is echoing
all over me, and she hasn't left. And all I
could say is that in reality, she may have left me,
and yet she's so utterly with me. That is the
only way I could discube oh I feel about huh?
Speaker 2: You know you're echoing some of the emotions that I've
heard from a lot of people that have been uncatitude,
and a lot of them are you know, cat parents,
and a lot of stories from my listeners. So cat
people have a very strong love for their cats, very deep.
It's just different, it really is. Josephine. I want to
thank you so much for coming on Catituded, and I
can't wait for a part two. So thank you so much.
Speaker 5: Thank you Michelle.
Speaker 2: I hope you enjoyed this show. I want to again
thank Josephine Spence for coming on Catitude and talking about
her book, A Cat's Tale. It is available in many
many places. I hope you take time to read it.
It is a really good book. I want to thank
my cat crew who patiently slept around me as I
read her book. So thank you Dennis, Charlotte and Mollie.
And of course the show would not be the same
without the magic of my producer. Thank you so much,
Mark Winter for all you do to make our shows
sound amazing. This is episode two hundred ninety nine. Wow,
So thank you for listening to Catatude for all of
these episodes, all of these years. Now stay tuned for
episode three hundred. I have a special celebrity guest. You
know her from television. She is amazing. She's doing some
incredible things coming up for animals, and she is such
a catlever. You will not want to miss episode three
hundred and hey lose to Attitude, have Cataitude.
Speaker 4: Let's talk pets every week on demand only on Petlight
Radio dot com.
Speaker 1: FO