Speaker 1: In the year twenty seven fourteen, a new squad of
Opera Davis was chosen by the College of Illusion. These
fools promptly went on to frustrate their DM at every opportunity. Today,
still working together, because really, who else would work with them?
They survive as adventurers of fortune. If you have a problem,
if no one else can help, and if you can
find them, maybe you can hire the Second Breakfast Club.
Speaker 2: Tony Kinney as Eddie.
Speaker 3: Falzoni, Jess Owen as a deer a Glow, Michael Cole
as Urag and.
Speaker 4: Jesse Wicks as Bill Crilliance.
Speaker 3: Nico Rodriguez as your DM.
Speaker 1: Welcome back to the continuing Tales of a Fool's Quest.
Speaker 3: All right, last we left our heroes. They jumped through
a portal and went back to the Forbidden City, which
is nice. They went home for a little bit, where
they proceeded to drive Dean Smelting absolutely bonkers. He had
a giant board. They told him all of these things
in random mortars and then then just walked out and
left him to go to the library where they did
some research, and they found out about the Lake of Fire,
and they found out how to get down to there
with the furyons. They went back to the Dean used
his grying orb and a map to get the view
that Eddie needed to be able to cast his own
shadow walk what's it called? Yeah, yeah, And then they
traveled down there, where they landed on a bed of
coals and immediately burst into flames.
Speaker 2: They were burning coals. It was like coal, right, not coals.
Speaker 5: It's on the shores of a lake of magma.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, they're hot coals.
Speaker 2: I thought it was coal, just black rocks.
Speaker 5: I mean, well technically.
Speaker 3: Yes, but but all I mean, it's not burning hot, right,
this is cooled down, but it is hot, right, so
like your shoes don't catch on fire, but it is
uncomfortably warm here.
Speaker 2: Yeah, let's move that way the way from the lake,
somewhere the ground's not that's unpleasant.
Speaker 6: A contingency plan for that, I'm going to wild shape
into one of those little cigarette demons.
Speaker 2: Okay, you're gonna set the coal beach on fire.
Speaker 6: Maybe not, Yeah, that's a three on the dice.
Speaker 3: Oh, dear lord, imagine that's not gonna come out real high.
Speaker 2: You set the coal beach on fire, so it's probably
it's gonna turned into a gum demon and melted in total.
Speaker 3: That's a big difference between six and seven. Seven is
success with one move, six is unsuccessful. That's a six,
all right. So with a six you pomp out. Oh,
we're gonna need a one D six from you real
quick to see how long you're stuck in this form.
Three hours, you pomp out, and you try to transform
into a demon, one of those cigarette demons. But while
you're trying to form the demon in your mind, these
the thoughts of the little gum demons just keep coming
back to your head. And right before you shift, you
shift into one of the gum demons.
Speaker 2: Yeah, melt onto the hot cool.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but you do absorb some of the you know,
coal stuff, and it gives you that cinnamon flavor.
Speaker 2: Spicy, it's big red.
Speaker 4: Gurgle rag.
Speaker 3: So I turn into a giant bubble gum demon and
h and yeah you.
Speaker 5: Giant bubble gum demons.
Speaker 3: Yeah yeah, and to you can you know, direct with
your hands and stuff, but your your mouth does not
look full on gurgle gurgle, full on gurgle gurgle. For
three as as Eddie and uh Bill walk away from.
Speaker 5: Just I just sort of look at myself in this forman.
Speaker 4: Sulk walk, gonna look at gurgle. So we can't we
can't do demons or.
Speaker 2: Birds, especially not birds, though he's done demons before.
Speaker 5: That's flips you off. But it's just a gum wad.
So you can't tell.
Speaker 4: When you turned into gum? Did you did you mean
to turn into gum that had already been chewed or
was that a happy accident?
Speaker 5: I smelled delicious, so.
Speaker 3: You do smell like burning cinnamon?
Speaker 2: All right, come on pick red.
Speaker 5: Yeah, it's my new code name.
Speaker 3: All you guys hear is gurgle, gurgle, gurglurgle every time
he ducks.
Speaker 7: Gurgle gurgle. Yep, that's all I can say for three
hours now.
Speaker 2: All right, all right, I'm going to pull that spyglass out, okay,
and can I see an island in this lake of fire?
It seems like a pretty vast like fire on that map.
Speaker 5: Can you say we were south of the House of Members?
Speaker 2: Mm?
Speaker 3: Hmm? Is that it is north of the lake? How
does that get so? So where you're at there is
the there's a ridge from the mountains and then it's
like a sheer cut off drop from the mountains where
it kind of goes down to the ground level. And
then you've got this beach which is about one hundred
yards long the entire distance around the lake. So all
around the lake you've got about a beach that's about
one hundred yards and it's just black coal. And if
you put up the eyeglass and you take a look,
you can see a tower out as an island in
the middle of the lake. From where you're at straight ahead,
it looks to be like a rundown tower, but it's
more like a wizard's tower than it is a jail
or a house.
Speaker 2: Can I see the bottom of the tower, like is
there on an island? Is there room around it or
is it just the tower?
Speaker 3: No, there's room around it. It's got about coal all over.
And then on the inside there there's actually like a
garden that's at the base of the tower, like very
green and lush.
Speaker 2: M hm hmmm. Well it could probably shadow walk us
out there. I just that's worried about miscasting it.
Speaker 4: But that's not the the actual house, right the House
of Members.
Speaker 2: It's the only thing I see out there.
Speaker 3: From where you're standing.
Speaker 4: From where we're that's what's out in the lake, so
we see the other end of the lake, right. I
thought the House of Members was like on the shore
we were on, but it's we're all right.
Speaker 2: You're sticky.
Speaker 4: Gurgle.
Speaker 2: Do you have any rope in your back?
Speaker 4: Gurgle, gurgle, gurgle.
Speaker 2: You actually you could probably climb that cliff and sticky.
Speaker 5: Any equipment I had is melted into my form.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but Bill's got a rope and you could probably
climb that cliff. Because you're sticky, we might be able
to get a better you from up there.
Speaker 4: Gurgle.
Speaker 2: Why don't you take the rope on up and see
if you see if you can climb up there? Grab
a rope?
Speaker 3: Okay, all right, let's go ahead. Make a strength check
as you gumball.
Speaker 2: Your way up. Yep, that's ten.
Speaker 3: All right. So how does it look when you successfully
climb this? I mean, yeah, you know when the Princess Bride,
when they've got those ropes and they're climbing up slowly
and the masked man is chasing out the dread pirate
Roberts is chasing after them. That's the cliffs of insanity, right,
That's what you're doing here all the way up as
your as your gumball self. How are you? How are
you getting up there?
Speaker 6: Well, I'm somewhat malleable, so i'd like I'll look around
for a handholder, a foothold, and then just kind of stretch.
Speaker 2: Your point see as picture and like you know those
WallWalker things of sticking a.
Speaker 6: Yeah, yeah, I don't know that kind of weird whack.
Speaker 3: It just makes it thwack noise every time you.
Speaker 4: Out And I A and I aren't even climbing the rope.
We've just tied ourselves to it, and so we're dangling fire.
Speaker 2: You're supposed to be this colossus, this legendary.
Speaker 3: Thing, and still he gains.
Speaker 2: And still smell like cinnamon. It's lovely.
Speaker 3: Yeah, all right. So you do make it to the top,
You get all the way up there, and uh, and Eddie,
you take out the spyglass again and cup your hand
and put it at the end to try and make a
little telescope out of it. Yeah, all right, So you
do that, and you look out and you do see
a second structure at the far end of the lake.
Speaker 2: Billy, you may have been correct. There's a second structure
at the far end of the lake.
Speaker 4: I'm always correct.
Speaker 2: Gurgle, gurgled, right, disagrees.
Speaker 4: Don't you gurgle like that at me?
Speaker 7: Gurgle.
Speaker 4: I'm going to take a piece of coal and throat
so it gets stuck on the side of his head.
Speaker 2: Grab another one to make eyeballs wor up on the cliff.
There's that coal up here? Just a rock?
Speaker 4: Do you want to build an orag man? Stick a
carrot in.
Speaker 2: The him, a carrot mohawk spikes? All right, what's this
structure look like out there?
Speaker 3: It looks like like a large, large mansion. You would
probably guess more than twenty thirty rooms like very It's
like a beautifully built estate for a rich person.
Speaker 2: Okay, build you know how many first people they're supposed
to be?
Speaker 4: Do You.
Speaker 3: Would know of at least a dozen from your thing,
but I can give you a better number if you
make your role in these twelve twelve there should be
eighteen left, okay, that you're aware of.
Speaker 4: It's yeah, so there's there's this eighteen ish store around and.
Speaker 2: He had all of them, but Abigail on there already, right.
Speaker 8: That's what he said.
Speaker 7: Yeah, all right.
Speaker 2: That might be the place. And it looks like a
big like mansion, like a like a whole noble estate.
But you know it's in the middle of lava.
Speaker 4: M h I mean yeah, I can't imagine. Mm hmm.
I can't imagine there's a I can't imagine there's another
giant house in the middle of the lake. Seems like
one's enough.
Speaker 2: Seems like it's probably the spot. Let's uh, can I
make it out well enough to get a good a
good good read on a shadow.
Speaker 3: Yeah, let's go ahead and make a roll for that.
Speaker 4: Let's turn obrag into a hang glider.
Speaker 2: That's an eight Nate.
Speaker 3: You feel confident enough that you could make it. You
could teleport you guys there and land on the shore.
It might be a little close to the fire, not
close to though the house, but on the shore.
Speaker 2: All right. I think I can get us there. I
don't know. It's a little fuzzy that far away, but
I think I can do it. All right, We'll walk
over to uh, you know, just a boulder that's got
a shadow behind it. I don't cast a spell. Let's see,
we have to.
Speaker 5: I'll stack them up.
Speaker 2: So Pillowa Lake Piloa. All right, I want to cast
a spell and go to the island with the estate
in Lake Poloa. Okay, that's a nine.
Speaker 7: I should have let us sayret I've kind of drawn
attention to myself.
Speaker 4: Okay, you can't pick. The other options are unoptionable.
Speaker 2: Okay, forget the spell or I've already got the minus one.
Attacked by a lava hydra, You're welcome, rag.
Speaker 4: Lava wall.
Speaker 2: I'm stuck is gurgle, gurgle for now? So you open
a portal yep, and uh, all right, it's a good
day to die. Then jump on through.
Speaker 4: Jump on through.
Speaker 3: Just as you come through the other side again, you
land kind of near the lava, but a safe enough
distance away that you're not burned. The coals are hot
under your feet and you take four points of damage.
Is a clawed creature that you couldn't see with your
roll through. The reaches out and snaps at you with
its giant claw like a crab claw, like a crab claw,
snaps right into you. And this thing is made of
of like like stone. This crab is made of like
a type of like obsidian, almost very clean looking lava crabs.
Speaker 4: Or rock lobster.
Speaker 3: So you're attacked by a rock lobster.
Speaker 2: Scoooby, I'm turn invisible. I'm a invisibility on myself immediately,
but I'm gonna shout rock lobster first, and I don't
think they'll be able to hear it because they're on
the far shore.
Speaker 3: But you couldn't even see it from from the down
at ground level.
Speaker 2: That die is cocked at like a per forty five shire.
You're okay, that's innate. I'm gonna forget invisibility.
Speaker 3: Okaye, cast invisibility and you are invisible, yes. And while
you are invisible, you are able to take a few
steps away from the rock lobster and look up and
down the beach, and you can see the beaches scattered
with them. They are probably a half dozen in your
general vicinity of these rock lobsters.
Speaker 2: How much damae would I take from it?
Speaker 3: Four points?
Speaker 2: Four points?
Speaker 4: Now, gonna have a hard trouble with the right on
this one.
Speaker 3: Already have that you also, you also notice the the
waves of the lava, you know, the the ebb and
flow of the lava starts to recede from the beach
a little bit, and the lobsters, rocks lobsters all stop
for a second and shove their claws up into the
air and just click them until they start to hear
the water come back in, the tide come back in,
not water, the lava, until they hear the fire the
magma start to come back closer to them.
Speaker 4: Don't do doot doom.
Speaker 3: But that's what you notice as you're invisible. Who was
next to come through the portal?
Speaker 4: I am all right.
Speaker 3: So you pop through and there's no one there. You
don't see atie at all. He's just he's gone. You
do see a rock lobster standing four feet away from you,
clapping its lobster hands in the air. It's claws, just
snap them together in the air.
Speaker 4: And dance backwards away from the shore and the lobster.
Speaker 3: Okay, see you dance backwards a handful doom.
Speaker 4: Doom so you can make unfortunate with things. They're probably.
Speaker 9: What you say to yourself, Yes, yes, correct, I'll wait
for bubble all right, big Red, big red, Yes, big
Red comes to.
Speaker 3: You all right, verbal verbal, And just as you PLoP out,
the tide starts to come back in. You see this
rock lobster next to you as well, and it is
clapping its its claws still, but its arms start to
come down and no longer are pointing at the sky,
and it starts to move side to side toward the noises.
It hears, Okay, does see uh HEADI no, no, do
see Bill? You do see Bill? Bill's He's taken several
steps away from the portal and the rock lobster, and
he's talking to himself about making himself a profit. I'll
make my way toward Bill, gurgle, gurgle. All right, as
you make your way in toward Bill, the rock lobster
continues to follow you and attacks, and his claw reaches
out and does does three points of damage.
Speaker 2: Gurgle, Hey, watch off for those rock lobsters. They pinch
O cast minor illusion and make an illusion of me.
Speaker 7: Will that Will that break my invisibility?
Speaker 3: Oh thinks so? I wouldn't say so.
Speaker 2: All right, then I have it. Just run down the
beach in front of all the rock lobsters.
Speaker 3: As you're running, the rock lobsters all ignore your illusion
and start moving toward you.
Speaker 2: Guys, I don't think these use their eyes.
Speaker 5: Chirmer said, mm hmm.
Speaker 4: Okay, hey, the you know who has throwing symbols, I'm
gonna I'm gonna check one hard to make it make
a noise, like in a direction away from us.
Speaker 3: Okay, so you check one once it hits the ground
and makes the noise, the one closest to you goes
and skidders in that direction.
Speaker 5: Is that the one that attacked me?
Speaker 2: Ye, that's the one that attacked me.
Speaker 3: I assume you're all standing still now right, Yeah, and
you're not making any noise except for you're talking.
Speaker 4: Yeas correct, And these are all just a coal beach.
Speaker 3: Yep.
Speaker 4: How far are we from like the grass?
Speaker 3: I mean you were near the fire, so I'd say
probably sixty yards from getting off the beach.
Speaker 4: Should we try and get up to the grass because
it's less noisy than the coals.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's probably a good idea.
Speaker 6: Now you said I was a like a larger sized
version of the ver thing.
Speaker 2: Yep.
Speaker 6: Okay, I'm gonna grab Bill and start making just making
my way up to off the beach.
Speaker 3: Okay, all right, do a strength check for you holding Bill?
Speaker 5: Five have no fingers or thumbs.
Speaker 3: So you got gum in his hair, so you go
to grab him and you yeah, you sticky his hat.
You knock him over, so he's all down onto the coals.
Speaker 4: I just start as soon as he starts talking, I
have no idea this is coming, So I'm just gonna
start to slap stumm it, stomm it.
Speaker 2: What are you doing?
Speaker 6: I point up to the other.
Speaker 3: So he knocks you down to the ground while trying
to help you, and the rock lobster once again turns
around and starts making its way towards you.
Speaker 2: I can make sound, I can make audible the rock
lobster a visual.
Speaker 4: Didn't they all stop when the tide receded?
Speaker 6: Though?
Speaker 4: So couldn't we just wait for that to happen and
then run for it?
Speaker 2: Maybe? How often does that happen? It's not m I'm
gonna I'm gonna cast mine illusion again, but I'm gonna
make the sound of just I don't know, someone falling
down the stairs. Okay, but down the beach where I
sat my first illusion to run.
Speaker 3: Make your role.
Speaker 2: Changed my mind. That's a five. He convince you.
Speaker 4: It makes the sound on himself.
Speaker 3: So this time when you you yeah, your invisibility does
hoop off? Yeah, and and you are frightened and yeah, yeah,
your your your illusion does not do anything.
Speaker 7: Yeah, we should get we should have to the grass.
Speaker 3: Right and for a moment, the fire Recedes and the
things put their hands up in the air and start clapping.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna run fun.
Speaker 3: Our heroes will return after these messages. Hey there, it's
Nako again. If you'd like to skip the ads next time,
as well as support our show, you should check out
our Patreon. All levels get ad free listening, where you
get to skip all the commercials, and then there are
a bunch of other features depending on what tier you
go with. Check out the link at www dot a
fools quest dot com. And now that the commercials are
out of the way, it's time to dive back into
the fool.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna need.
Speaker 3: Dexterity checks from you guys because you're running on coals.
Speaker 2: Tout eleven.
Speaker 3: Also eleven okay, all right, so you both are able
to run for a short distance. Uh, and then you
hear the the fire move back toward the shore with
the coals. Do you continue running?
Speaker 2: Freeze red light, green lights?
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'll stop.
Speaker 3: And I'll go into defend mode.
Speaker 6: So if anything, any of the rock lobsters decide to
snap at them.
Speaker 3: Eight okay, all right, So you go into defend mode
and I'm going to see if they catch up with
you or not, let's hold one they do catch up.
That is a ten on the die. So the one
that was closest to uh to Bill and Orag puts
down its claws and starts in your general direction. And
one starts moving towards Eddie as well because he ran
down the beach a little ways, so it starts moving
towards Eddie as well. But the one that does get
caught up with Rag and Bill gets up there. So yeah,
what's your defend role?
Speaker 5: Do it?
Speaker 6: Gives me a hold number, okay, and then when whoever
I'm defending gets attacked, I can spend a hold to
choose one of the actions.
Speaker 3: Okay, well it is going to attack Bill right now. Yeah,
I'll take the hit for him. Okay, that is a
hit see home three points of damage minimum damage again.
All right, so it clops at yeah, I mean it's
just slicing through your bubblegum doing no no damage at
all and us.
Speaker 6: Like cutting Plato. And then you can just push it back.
Speaker 3: Right yeah, yep? All right, do you guys do anything
or do you just freeze and hold still until.
Speaker 4: I'm not gonna stand still until it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, same, Okay, I'm.
Speaker 5: Gonna try to pick him up again.
Speaker 8: Six garble herbled, so so you try to pick him up,
but it was during when the other one snapped at you,
so you went to defend him too, and you just
knocked him down on the ground again, and the rock
lobster snapping at him, trying to get to him, but
just finding your gouey bubble gum I'm.
Speaker 2: Using the other body. The claws are stuck.
Speaker 3: Together now and then the fire recedes and their arms
all go up and gummy one, there's gums sticking it together,
you know, like you a slimy gum between your fingers
in the air, just snapping, snapping. But yeah, what do
you guys do?
Speaker 2: Run all right?
Speaker 3: Next the already checks all around and seven twelve twelve
okay and nine yeah, all right, well you don't have
to do dex rage, okay, all right? So Bill, you
be lying it and you actually make it to the
fringe on the grass.
Speaker 1: Eddie.
Speaker 3: You take off running, but you find your feet are
wobbly on the on the you know, charcoal, right, it's
not like even as easy as running on sand, because
it's it keeps twisting your ankles, your feet are moving
in bad directions, and you stumble and you fall down
at one point and fall on your hands and knees.
You're still probably about twenty yards away from the edge
of the of the beach.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna try another minor illusion, make a make make
the sound of someone clattering on the rocks back behind
the lobsters. Okay, that's an eight. Okay, I will forget
that spell.
Speaker 5: Okay, all right, So Bill is ahead of all of us.
Speaker 3: Mm hmm he stumbled.
Speaker 6: I'll go defend him until he can make his way
to the fringe.
Speaker 3: Also, okay, I will need a dexterity chuck from you
then for that, because he was a ways away from you,
so you need to rush over to him. Seven seven okay,
So yeah, you are going to make some good distance,
but you know that you're not going to get to
him in time. I will give you the option, though,
to actually go and attack the You could make it
to the lobster itself instead of Daddie. That'll work, okay,
I'll keep.
Speaker 5: It preoccupied so it focuses on me Insteaday, ye, all right,
that's not very well. That's a wore.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 3: So you go over and you slam the ground right
in front of him. Right in front of lobster, and
the wave starts to come back or the fire seems
to come back up towards the beach, and it just
reaches out and claw attacks you. Definitely a hit for
four points of damage. I got it, Gurble. So it
snaps at you with one claw and h and yeah,
it's just trying to get you, but it's not doing anything.
Speaker 2: And then U.
Speaker 3: Snip and mush yep eddie. You can see him behind you.
Your illusion doesn't seem to be doing anything. I mean,
it makes noise and it does that, but it's not
drawing the attention of any of the things. You begin
to think that maybe, oh actually, Rag couldn't have told
you what it was, because he says.
Speaker 2: Gurgle, Gurble, yea, all right, I'm gonna pick up the
baseball sized rock and throw it as far as I can.
Speaker 3: Okay, like in the general direction of the of the
fire of the.
Speaker 2: Fire, yeah, away from the direction we're.
Speaker 3: Going, okay, like into the fire though, or no, like
still on the beach. Okay, okay, all right, yeah, go
ahead and make a uh dexterity roll eleven eleven, All right,
so you chuck it it lands, you know, a good
twenty yards behind the lobster, and two of the lobsters,
including the one that just attacked, puts its claws up
and starts waddling back toward the rock that you just chucked.
Speaker 2: I think they have a tremor sense.
Speaker 6: Herbal so I just do like this overly simplistic tiptoe e.
Speaker 3: It's completely unnecessary. Alright, So you tiptoe back toward the beach.
Speaker 6: Yeah, just literally awkward and comical.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm gonna run, all right, So what are yours? Bat?
Speaker 3: Yeah, so you take off, run end, do another dexterity
roll and see if you get it.
Speaker 2: I know that's a five trip immediately.
Speaker 3: Okay, So the rock lobster is gonna turn around. The
one closest to you, not both of them, but the
one that's closes to you again turn around and start
making its way towards you again. It's keeping pace with UAG.
They're like walking side by side. It's not gonna get
to you though, Okay. And eventually the waves rescind it quotes,
claws go up into the air and start snapping again.
And are you gonna try again?
Speaker 2: Yeah? All right, Bill?
Speaker 3: What are you doing while they're doing.
Speaker 4: This icking come out of my hair.
Speaker 2: Okay again, okay, all right.
Speaker 3: So you make it to the grassy area and which
really just it's it's ground. It's not as lush as
what you saw at the bottom of that tower. There
are some weeds and stuff going out of it, though,
but it's kind of like hard earth with some some
tough roots growing around. But yeah, you make it to
that and your leg is still bleeding from where it
chommed you, Like really, it got your muscle real good.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and prepare, I'm I'm gonna look at it. I'm
gonna look at at you.
Speaker 3: Man.
Speaker 4: That was that was crazy. I probably got you that
for a second. It's a seven?
Speaker 2: Did give it? Did kid?
Speaker 8: Me?
Speaker 2: Didn't it?
Speaker 4: So I guess I could attract attention I or it's
up to you. I suppose I forgot well symbols. So
I healed you for eight.
Speaker 3: Oh well, you definitely attract attention.
Speaker 4: And I'm gonna give you two D six to your damage.
All forward. Nice man, I thought I got you there
for a second. Rag if you ever touched me again,
while you're gum, I'm burning down the grove, girdle, girdle,
while you're a gum. All right, so we're here, Shall
we make our way to the house.
Speaker 2: Are the rock losters still chasing us?
Speaker 3: No, they stop at the edge of the.
Speaker 4: I figured they won't our movement as well on there.
Speaker 2: That was the hope, but you never know.
Speaker 4: That's true. The symbols didn't bring them either, so that's
good news.
Speaker 2: Yeah, let's make our way to that their mansion.
Speaker 3: Huh yeah, all right, so you guys start moving up
toward the mansion. It is a beautiful mansion. You can
see there are, you know, lots of windows around it,
but all the windows have curtains that have shuttered or
not shuttered, but that are that are closed over the windows,
so you can't see inside. There's this beautiful stairwell that
leads up through these hedges that are around it. The
hedges seem a little out of place because there are hedges,
and it's not very lush area to be growing these.
It's not really the right climate either, considering you're surrounded
by an entire lake of lava, but probably magically grown
hedges that are there. They're brown, more brown than they
are green. But the stair stairs lead past that up
towards the house. It's one of those stairwells where it's
like goes up three stairs and it's flat for like
ten steps, then up three more stairs in a flat
for a while, and it gets up to the house
and you can see as you approach the house that
there are two giant doors that are there. These doors
are probably fifteen feet tall and probably eight feet wide.
Good and Bill, As you're walking you feel a vine
reach out and grab your ankle and yank you toward
one of the hedges.
Speaker 4: Me as soon as I feel a touch, O your
piece of shitang.
Speaker 3: And you take two points of damage as it starts
to draw you toward the hedge. Okay, because you've called
attention to yourself, right I did? Yeah? Yeah, oh yeah, Okay,
what are the rest of you do?
Speaker 2: I'm gonna try to grab Bill. I'll pull up my
heavyly staff and just start thumping on the vine.
Speaker 3: Okay, all right? String check from ouag attack from Eddie
nine nine eight all right, so you're attack. That's an
eight for its strength, so you are able to stop
it from pulling Bill toward it. But it doesn't release
Bill quite yet. Ten damage, ten damage, okay, so it
does slash out and hit you with some of its
storms too, only doing two points of damage. But but
you are able to separate with the god. You just
mash it in the that little fibers of the vine
just break apart and start leaking gooey brown sludge out
of it, and it reels its vine back as it
releases Phil.
Speaker 2: Bill stuffs growing around.
Speaker 4: Where where are your hands right now? Gurgle, gurgle, you
let me die? You understand me, You let me die?
Speaker 3: Old of his hands are.
Speaker 2: Like turle, and you know where they are?
Speaker 4: At this point, I'll take the wet hat back.
Speaker 3: Some of the other had just start to flail their
vines looking for whatever was out there.
Speaker 2: We should probably go, all right, you know what those
never mind, I'm pretty sure they're not called gurgle, gurgle, gurple.
Speaker 4: Oh it's singular.
Speaker 2: Let's stay away from the They completely surround the house.
Speaker 3: Uh yeah, but you can get you can navigate through them,
all right. Yeah, let's keep as do anything to call
attention to yourself.
Speaker 7: Try to be quiet.
Speaker 2: Bill.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm the four apblem, I think.
Speaker 6: Because we go, who just kind of spreads his arms
out and form a barrier between the hedge and Bill.
Speaker 3: As you're moving. You're picking up like needles and oh yeah,
I'm like the knee down.
Speaker 6: I'm just you know, amassing a conglomeration or ship.
Speaker 3: Yeah, just just loose stuff everywhere sticking to you.
Speaker 4: Just a man size roller at this point.
Speaker 5: Not bigger than that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, all right, you guys make it up to the door,
these giant doors.
Speaker 2: Is there a doorbell there is? I'm ringing the doorbell,
all right, the sugar touch are gonna knock. Sorry, doorbell
there is, I'm gonna knock.
Speaker 3: All right, So you ring the doorbell. A sound goes
off throughout the entire mansion, ringing at every level, and
you hear large thumpings coming from behind the door. After
a few moments, the thumbings, you know, getting louder, and
then it comes to a brief halt, and then the
door slowly opens, the creaking noise echoing in the foyer
behind you as you see this large autonomous rock monster
with molten lava and its joints opening the door for you,
and it's got a little tie wrapped around its neck,
and it says, Hi, we're here to visit.
Speaker 2: Please sard in at the registreet.
Speaker 3: Sure thing, He turns around he starts walking away.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna walk right on in. Look for the registry,
all right.
Speaker 3: So you walk in. There is a it's a big foyer.
There's plenty of chairs around. There's this little claw like
the not closets, but wardrobe like the standalone wardrobes for
you to hang your coat and if you've got gloves
or anything like that at all, you can put it. There,
a spot to put your travel packs and whatever that
you might have. And refreshment table with waters. And on
the refreshment table there is a registree to sign in.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna drink some of the water and sign in
the second breakfast club minus Adeira okay currently because she's indisposed.
Speaker 3: All right, So you can sign it. You do see
above it on the registry. There are several instances of
Loki's name being written in at different points that are
on there. But it says for you to put your name,
and then next to it it has a little box
and it says sample.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna check the box.
Speaker 3: M You can't put ink there. The ink just dissolves
when you try to check it.
Speaker 4: Is there anything in the sample boxes about?
Speaker 3: Okay? You put a little piece of gum in there,
all right, and a visitor's badge appears on your gum.
Speaker 2: Gurgle, gurgle, A right, got a get a knife?
Speaker 5: No, I left my leg with the ship on it.
Speaker 6: It's probably I'm sharpened on it.
Speaker 2: I left my leg with the gash in it. Pick
a scab and drop it on your box.
Speaker 3: A visitor's badge appears on your chest.
Speaker 4: I'm just I'm just gonna pluck a hair and stick
it in there.
Speaker 3: Just one hair. Yeah, the one hair is not quite enough, sort.
Speaker 4: Of the gum out of it.
Speaker 7: So what happens if we put abails here?
Speaker 4: She would probably have a when she gets put in here,
and then she'd be able to get out. I think
she would have it right now, though in lowke he
would have questions.
Speaker 2: One hair doesn't seem to be enough anyway.
Speaker 4: Okay, uh, I'll I'll pull more hairs until it takes someone.
Speaker 3: All right, It takes about five hairs. Your eyes are
watering now from plucking each individual hair out of your
head and you put it down in the little stamp box.
Speaker 4: Oh true, this is nothing. I get waxed once a week.
I do it myself neck down.
Speaker 3: Then why are you complaining about he's literally trying to
help you wax.
Speaker 4: It's no, it's not the same. Could be I spend
good money on the most premium of waxes.
Speaker 2: Waxed and gummed are not the same, the same effect though.
Speaker 3: All right, So you you've got five hairs from unknown
body locations that you drop onto the little box and
it absorbs them, and a guest badge appears on your chest.
Speaker 7: In between your toes.
Speaker 2: All right, let's explore. Yeah, verbal see anyone around We
hear anyone around you here.
Speaker 3: There are just a couple of automative style constructs walking
around that seem to have been formed by local materials
that are doing different things. There's, you know, a small
little lava sprite that's dusting the building by burning the
dust away around different things. There are stairwells that go
into different locations, but you don't see any humanoid creatures.
Speaker 4: Yeah, should we go start checking the rooms?
Speaker 2: Yeah? I reckon, I reckon. We should start exploring. All right,
let's split up.
Speaker 3: Let's just Google check the kitchen.
Speaker 4: We don't split up. We stay together and we sendreg
to explore elsewhere. Bidens are.
Speaker 3: So so there are no bedrooms really on the main floor.
You can hear some want somebody singing in one of
the back rooms. You can hear some sizzling, you can
smell some cooking. There are different things that are happening
around different rooms of the main floor that if you
choose to explore, you can those different rooms, or there
are stairwells that go upstairs into the second, third, and
fourth level.
Speaker 2: Let's go check out the kitchen.
Speaker 4: I do like a kitchen. Okay, gurgle, We'll make ourselves
a giant sub hell yeah.
Speaker 3: All right, So you go into the kitchen and when
you arrive in there, you see five or six different
entities that are these round globular balls of like tar,
and they've got rock arms coming out of them, and
they've got five or six rock arms, and they're all
rotating and doing different things. But they're cooking and doing dishes.
And right now one is like chopping up some onions
and some some potatoes and stuff. And yeah, they're just
cooking on the in the middle of the in the
middle of the room, there's an island, a really big
island with a bunch of prepared food that's just chilling there.
Speaker 2: Gurbl gurble, Yeah, I imagine that's forgotten. We got badges.
It's probably fine. I'll go over and grab a waffle
on a fish stick or whatever.
Speaker 3: Yeah. Absolutely, yeah, I've regressing for all right. None of
the creatures have mouths. They all have one eye right
in the center of the tar.
Speaker 2: A picture like a picturing like the you know, the
the Imperial Interrogation Droid.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but but tar, yeah, but tar.
Speaker 2: Yeah, because let's let's check out that music. That's got
to be a person, right, Like, I don't think these
things could make music. Yeah, I know, I don't think
I make food. An eat my fish thick and waffle
or whatever and head towards the music.
Speaker 3: Yeah, okay, So you head into the room and there
is it is a creature, and it is playing some
kind of weird, bizarre looking piano but it's circular, so
it's sitting in the middle of it, and uh, it's
just playing this piano in all different directions, a stringed
instrument and playing the keys and making this weird vibrating
noise that is kind of like singing but with no word.
Speaker 4: Is it good?
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's really good. You know, you know the scene
with the weird alien thing in the fifth Element. It's
doing that while playing the piano.
Speaker 2: See you said like a weird vibrating noise, and I
was picturing like those little what what are those one
of those toys, like like a record octaphone or something. Yeah,
that's what I was picturing.
Speaker 3: It does have like a so it's not exactly like
fifth Element Chick. It's definitely got like a vibration to it.
You can tell there's a vibration, but it's doing that
same song. Okay, hi there it makes a vibrating Hello.
Speaker 2: We're guests. Yes, who are you?
Speaker 3: I'm the musician.
Speaker 2: As serious? Are you one of the residents or one
of the staff staff? Okay, as staff. Maybe you could
direct us to where the residents are. We'd like to
visit with some of them.
Speaker 3: H they're on this floors.
Speaker 2: Above the floors above the first floor.
Speaker 3: Is not for guests or or residents.
Speaker 2: Who's it for?
Speaker 3: It is for the master of the house.
Speaker 2: He doesn't reside here, Yes he does, then you can't
allow him up there. It's dangerous.
Speaker 3: It falters at playing the music as it tries to process.
Speaker 6: We're just gonna roll short circuiting everything we talk to you.
Speaker 2: We better go check that out and make sure it's
safe for him to be up there. Oh no, that's
the only way you said. He resides here and residents
aren't allowed up there, so we really need to inspect things.
It might not be safe for him. He's not a prisoner,
he's a resident.
Speaker 3: Mmm, all right, he's the master.
Speaker 2: Listen, we're gonna go up and meet the residence. Thanks
for the Thanks for the help.
Speaker 3: Gurgle gurgle to you.
Speaker 2: Do you know that language? Yes?
Speaker 4: Could you translate a message for me?
Speaker 3: Yes?
Speaker 4: Tell him go funck himself.
Speaker 3: I think he understands.
Speaker 4: You, gurgle.
Speaker 6: I was trying to help.
Speaker 4: Him to be because he doesn't understand g Well, it's gurgle,
gurgling back to me.
Speaker 3: I can speak gurgle.
Speaker 4: It's gonna translated to gurgle, gurgle. You don't speak it.
Speaker 3: Which is it translates saying gurgle, gurgle to you like yourself?
Speaker 6: I got it yet, alight, gurgle. I was trying to
help you. Ask sorry about the gum in your hair?
Speaker 3: Do you want to know what he says?
Speaker 6: Oh?
Speaker 4: Not particularly.
Speaker 2: Well, Thanks for your help, gurgle, gurgle. We'll probably see
on the way out.
Speaker 3: He starts playing the piano again.
Speaker 2: All right, up the stairs again.
Speaker 3: All right, which floor are you going to?
Speaker 2: Oh? I guess just the next one. Okay, just the
second for now.
Speaker 3: Okay.
Speaker 2: You think you think it meant Loki as the master
of the house.
Speaker 4: He said, the master of the house resides here though, yeah,
but like it's like never here, but.
Speaker 2: Like it's never here on mortal terms. But who knows,
you know, not he could have spent way more time
here than we've.
Speaker 4: Been a god. All right, drop the capital G.
Speaker 2: And capital I say, hey, god, it's not even that
great one.
Speaker 3: Show, hear you? All right, So you guys move up
to the second floor. Yeah, and you see a sign
on the second floor that is written in Elvin, and
it also does have thieves can't in different spots around
it some emojis, but the Elvin reads specifically, beware this
floor is for one prisoner only.
Speaker 2: Keep going.
Speaker 4: Yeah, maybe we started at the top and work, or we're.
Speaker 2: Down yeah, or or the middle. We'll start on the
third floor. We'll see. So let's read the sign there.
Speaker 4: Yeah, let's go to the third floor.
Speaker 3: Okay, go to the third floor, and there are no
signs on the third floor.
Speaker 2: That seems like a good sign. And it seems like
they put up warnings when you need to be warned.
Speaker 4: Yeah, I'm we don't need to beware this feel safe.
We should be unaware. I guess yeah he's in. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, let's let's let's go on into the third floor here.
Speaker 3: All right. So you go into the third floor and
you make your way down the hallway and you come
up to the very first door that you see. It
does appear to be magically sealed with not I lot
of magic, but definitely some magic. And there is a
name on the door.
Speaker 2: What's the name on the door?
Speaker 3: The name on the door says thor killing.
Speaker 4: Is that a name I know as the first person? Ah,
make a roll for that nine.
Speaker 3: I would say it rings a bell, But you don't
know any pacific lored that's attached to him. And here's
a good sponse, take break, I know some of these words.
Speaker 10: This concludes this episode of A Fool's Quest. Join us
next time for more fun and daring adventure. Thank you
for listening, and don't forget to like, subscribe, review, and
comment on your favorite platform. To listen to A Fool's
Quest