Speaker 1: Hello, everybody, Welcome back to the fire Escape Cast. It
is episode one hundred and trace. I'm Michael Hardy here
as always here with Dan Reikert.
Speaker 2: Yeah, aye, that's me.
Speaker 1: Sorry one hundred and twas Sorry Dan, I went low
brow Spanish for a second.
Speaker 2: Oh that's much better.
Speaker 1: I only listened to French and Mary.
Speaker 2: That's what I say. That's my catchphrase.
Speaker 1: Wow, nice bag at nice? How's it going good?
Speaker 2: I just got run this light outside when we do this, Yeah.
Speaker 1: We've done a few this year. I feel like it's nice.
I like it because it's not one am on the
East Coast.
Speaker 2: I like the late night podcast.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think you both do.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm drinking coffee like it's so odd. And the
light on my face isn't my my fake light ring light,
which is like very glaring. It's the on.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, just a green wall at all times when
I'm recording stuff here.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Do you have blackout curtains?
Speaker 2: I feel like you Those are blue, but if you
close them, the light doesn't come in.
Speaker 3: Blackout curtains doesn't mean they're black. It means that it
blacks out the sun.
Speaker 2: It doesn't hurt though, if it is right I wonder how.
Speaker 3: I mean it's extra if they're also black. Yeah, I wonder.
Speaker 1: How different my bookshelf is from. Oh, Paul probably doesn't
have a bookshelf.
Speaker 2: No, he's got he's got some baseball books. He's got
some like he had some old Stephen King stuff. Yeah.
Speaker 1: There are like six wine books that are actually out
for studying that are not on the shelf right now.
Speaker 2: Wow, Yeah, he's got a lot of those. Yeah. I
think you are you know, I think you are cool.
You've got a passion and you follow it and you're
on a passion about it. I respect it. I did.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I'm over there and give you a niggy.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree more with Mary.
Speaker 1: Actually, that's fine.
Speaker 3: I get on my side. Let's beat them up.
Speaker 1: I have my test on May first for two.
Speaker 2: All right, what different colors can wine be? Oh?
Speaker 1: Fuck god? See this is why I need to study
more blue.
Speaker 2: Or red red? Is there a blue wine?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 2: They should do that gimmick words.
Speaker 1: Like in purple white, like Surrah and pinotage like a bluish.
Speaker 2: I got I'm gonna change the marketing of the wine world.
Remember like in the nineties when pop Secret would do
like oh, it's popcorn, but these are like pink and
green and blue popcorn. Or here's you know, blue ketchup
and stuff like that. I'm gonna start a line of
wines and it's gonna be wacky colors and flavors, and
it's gonna be like squeeze its. They will all have
faces on the side of the bottle, and they'll all
have different personalities. Goofy gray Pear's, you know, billy blue
raspberry wine goo.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it changes the color of your tongue.
Speaker 1: Wacky banana is to die for?
Speaker 3: Can you put googly eyes on the bottles? I've always wanted.
Speaker 2: This would get me more into wine. You'd get people
like me.
Speaker 1: And there's a lot of people doing similar stuff in
like the natural wine world that are trying to make it,
like yes, less stuffy and more fun, and they're.
Speaker 3: One time during Christmas, I bought a bottle of wine
because it came with a tiny Santa hat.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, we need to gimmick up the wine industry.
Speaker 1: Oh it's got so it was.
Speaker 3: So cute and I was look at him, he's got
a little hat on. Like if you put little cowboy
hats on your wine, I'd be like, let's get them
all got a industry is.
Speaker 1: Just as gimmicky as video maybe not as video games,
but it's close. Like there's.
Speaker 3: I had to bust out the full name for that.
Speaker 2: I'm not kidding.
Speaker 1: Oh, Michael, there are some people that are trying some
uh some questionable stuff marketing wise.
Speaker 2: Are there wine pre order bonuses?
Speaker 1: Oh? God, yeah, dude, people people like people. Uh with
some of the most expensive wines in the world, you
have to pre order and you only you get like
a lottery to to order them. And then you yeah.
Speaker 2: You don't get like a special catwoman level if you
do it, Like what do you get if you pre
ordered bonus? A wine?
Speaker 3: You can peel off the lady on the other side. Okay,
I mean I'm giving the wine industry free ideas.
Speaker 1: Here you're pouring nineteen brunello and fucking foon Kay Johnson
comes out of the bottle. Nice. I would buy that,
that would be I would have questions about that.
Speaker 3: What are those chocolates?
Speaker 1: Kinder surprise already a wine bottle.
Speaker 3: There should be wino surprises. There's a little plastic trinket
in each bottle that you get that you might choke on,
so there is a warning on the.
Speaker 2: Cracker Jack Yes, yeah, or cereal.
Speaker 3: You could have a cracker Jack wine with the special
feature isn't even that it tastes good. There's just an
item in there.
Speaker 2: You get a cork that changes color based on like
how wet it gets with the wine.
Speaker 1: I mean.
Speaker 2: The process was. It was cereals. Sometimes you'd get a
plastic spoon that would be like, oh, it's neon green,
but then when it touches the milk it turns blue. Thought, oh,
they should have a cork that when it touches the
wine it changes color. But that just happens.
Speaker 3: I remember that serial gimmick, and that was really special.
Your idea is faltered, but I do like your vision.
There are there were beer bottles that I thought were
cool that they the label changed color and the beer
was cold enough to drink, of course, which is like
it's real courses, it's red wine. But if it's too
cold or too warm, the bottle gets all weird. Yeah,
and it's like no, no nons to be classic room temp. Yeah,
the actual wine colors, it's not the right thing.
Speaker 1: You and this blue wine thing, you got to see
it through blue wine? What the hell is the name
of that comedian with the Guinness Coors joke.
Speaker 2: That I love.
Speaker 1: Uh he's from Colorado. No, hmm, I'll figure it out.
He's got like, yeah, you guys.
Speaker 3: Like a lick a stick, but it's like stuff. No,
lick a stick is different. Yes, it means it does
have the pixie stick stuff, but you lick the stick
and then you dip it.
Speaker 2: Those are fun sticks, right, fun dip but dip.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we found a way we got.
Speaker 2: I don't love those because like that you bite is
chalky and weird. And I also I never like to
as much as I like sugar, I need to be
a part of something. It can't just be sugar.
Speaker 3: I was just wondering, is there a way to bring
the fun of fun dip to winem?
Speaker 2: Could you make like a bowl of wine that you
dip cheese into or something?
Speaker 3: See I knew the cheese was somehow going to make
its way into this conversation, but I don't think we're
there yet. I'm thinking of like a fun straw that
has like lots of different like swivels in it, but
it's also a cookie.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, well, I feel like it would get soggy.
Speaker 3: It wouldn't survive long.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I like.
Speaker 2: I like any gimmick where you eat the thing, like
like a tortilla bowl, you know, where it's like, this
is a vessel and then I eat it. I like it.
Speaker 3: Or the hat from the Simpsons where it was like
a Western hat and the cheese was in thee.
Speaker 2: That specific reference got me into trouble because I made
a bed ten years ago and Giant Bond was like, oh,
I'll eat a hat if this thing doesn't happen, and
I thought in my head, like, oh, it's no big deal.
If I lose, I'll just go one of those from
the Simpsons.
Speaker 3: Yeah, because that is real.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they don't. They don't exist for many many years.
Speaker 1: I think there is.
Speaker 3: There is a world in which have you ever seen
those hats that have like two beers on each side?
Speaker 1: I owned one.
Speaker 3: Can they do that for wine?
Speaker 1: Yeah? You just put words and you couldn't straw. Yeah,
hat like a tricorn.
Speaker 3: I just like the point of the side is that
it looks really good at like a baseball game, you know,
where other alcoholics are. But winos want to be like fancy,
so it has to be something that like looks.
Speaker 1: Like I think you guys need to spend more time
around people who are railing a wine. They're not all
every other wee. There's some oh yeah, true, other people
besides me. It's it's not the most it's not always
this glamorous thing.
Speaker 2: In fact, it feels like most wine people are also
into boats, which.
Speaker 1: Well, yeah, boats are I agree.
Speaker 3: So it's like a pair of sperries. But there's like
a place where you can put mini wine bottles.
Speaker 1: In the uh you got? I got some people to
show you that are characters in the wine industry who
are like the most down to earth farmers who would
make stone Cold look preppy. Okay, yeah, I.
Speaker 2: Would hang out with them, I know. No.
Speaker 1: Yeah, whatever happened to the beer hats? I feel like
I have one day They're bad.
Speaker 2: I thought they'd be great, and then I got one
as a gift one so I'm like hell yeah, And
I put two beers in there and I drank a
little bit and it's kind of hard and weird to
drink with it, and then it's worse afterwards because it's like,
I guess I probably should have found a way to
actually clean it, but like beer just kind of stays
in the straw, and it's not like you're using it
every couple of days and keeping it flushed out, so
it just gets gross and smelly and it's not good.
Speaker 3: It does sound gross, especially if it's those fun windy
straws that are like, yep, it could be pretty gross.
I have a novelty beer baseball hat a bat that
I got from the Portland Pickles. They have a baseball team,
and you can buy a bat that's hollow, like a
plastic bat, and you can fill it with beer and
it comes with a lid. You know, it's like the
bottom of the bat. You can screw it on and
you can like swing with it and everything, and the
beer's in there and it's totally solid. But what happened
was is like I got drunk on beer bats, bat beer,
and then I went home and like threw the bat
in like a closet and the next time I was like,
let's go to this Portland Pickles game. I took out
my bat and opened it and it was fucking gross.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's my fault.
Speaker 3: It's my fault. I could have rinsed the beer.
Speaker 2: That handsome gimmick though, that's that's the type of stuff
you need to bring the wine is because like that
is a good gimmick. I feel like beer and like
candy and kids foods have so many.
Speaker 3: Good wine and a beer bat like you need to
have like its own things. The juxtaposition, like a book.
Yeah it looks like but when you open it, it's
just straight up liquid in there and you have to
hold it a very specific angle. Or all the wine phones.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like people get those fake bibles that like
hold guns, like, no do that with wine.
Speaker 1: That blue one here is a fake book that's.
Speaker 2: Your gun wine book. Okay.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: If you pull it, the wall opens up and there's.
Speaker 1: Like a gimp back there like oh yeah, yeah, you
love that bit. You do that all the time. Rob
does it too. I would love to hide that's I would.
I could probably fashion a wine gun book. I don't
know what they like.
Speaker 2: I don't have anything to hide as far as like
I don't have guns, weeds, legals, so I don't have
to like hide weed. Like it's the nineties, Like I
don't really need to tuck anything away. But I like
the idea of that, you know, like a fake book
or something.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's cooling.
Speaker 3: Book just for the novelty of it. You don't have
to put anything dangerous in there. But if you really want,
I'll buy you a gun.
Speaker 2: I don't think I want a gun, A little one. No,
I've got a gun to shoot salt for when woods
come out.
Speaker 1: That's good for house flies. Yes, it's bursting. We use
it for like mementos, like from dates and traveling and whatnot.
I like playbills from stuff. It's just of Amanda. There's
some there's some stuff in here that I can't show you. No,
I'm just kidding, but like like name tags from people's weddings,
we put it and whatnot.
Speaker 2: Yet one of those boxes, Yeah, it's bursting.
Speaker 1: I need a new one. But it's the night before Christmas.
Throw them off. They'll never know what was that?
Speaker 2: Wasn't the Scrooge thing? What is the night before Christmas?
Is that just a poem or something?
Speaker 1: Scrooge is Christmas Carol? Night before Christmas? Yeah, it's a
poem through the house. Yeah you're sleeping. Not even or
not a creature was stirring. Not even a mouse went
out on the rooftop or rose such a clatter or something.
It's not like I memorize the entire thing. Yeah, I'm
not like, I'm not continually thinking about Christmas all the time.
So I do singing a Christmas carol while we were
making our bad earlier.
Speaker 3: Also, all of his books are hollow, and they're filled
with drugs.
Speaker 1: It's not drugs. I mean it's legal. It's a drug,
but it's legal. There's several one here.
Speaker 2: I keep all my marijuana in a red dead redemption
two leather caddy thing that rocks are something that I
know exactly. Yeah, that's my that's my weed thing.
Speaker 3: Yeah, my weed thing. Mine's in my grandma's candy dish.
I don't know how she would feel about that, but
I do like to keep her with me because my
Carama was really cool. No, I don't think so. She
really liked farm veil on Facebook, and she liked uh
water aerobics, and she liked to make blueberry muffins.
Speaker 2: This is some classic old lady stuff I like.
Speaker 3: I know, she was a class she was she was
a standard, but she was a knockout gal and I
really like her. She was killing it. But anyway, when
she passed, I was a to get some items from her,
just as everybody in the family, and some things that
were really important to me was her tea set because
we used to have tea when I was like a kid,
and her candy dish because I always just remember like
having like little old lady candy in there and being like,
all right, you know the one with the strawberry absolutrapper
and stuff. Very important. Anyway, I don't really actually keep
hard candy in the house yet. I mean, one day
I think I will, but right now it's filled with
my weed pen and my CBD gummies and et cetera,
et cetera. And I never really thought about it until
just now. But I don't know if that's like the
right place for it, but I do look at it
a lot, and I really like thinking about her.
Speaker 2: I think that works. There's nothing inherently wrong with some weed.
Yeah it's legally, Grandma would be. Yeah, yeah, it's legal,
but it's stupid still some places like it's completely legal
recreationally here, but there's a dispensary near me, but the
dispensary laws are like fucking weird here, so I had
to get a medical license. Oh that is weird, And
it's just it's just one of these stupid charades you.
Speaker 3: Give someone twenty bucks and they're just like you need it,
and they give you a piece of paper.
Speaker 2: You know, you get on a video call with some
guy and you say, like, yes, I have anxiety and
sometimes I have trouble sleeping. And you have to go
through this whole thing and submit a form to the
state and do all this stuff and then it costs money,
right yeah, yeah, but then you're good for like three
years and by the time that's up there will be
actual recreational dispensaries.
Speaker 3: Here I think so too.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but like bars will sell THHD drinks. You can
buy gummies and TC drinks at the grocery store, but
for like actual like I like the vape cartridges and
stuff like if you want to get flour or that,
you have to go to an actual like medical dispensary. Still,
it's weird.
Speaker 3: Portland's always been like kind of the wild West for
that stuff. We've always been the first to legalize. In fact,
we criminalized all drugs. I don't know if you guys
knew that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, heroine stuff, didn't it not go well?
Speaker 3: It has been great, but it's controversial of like literally
if it's because like that's a bad idea or if
the reality is like yeah, if you're if you're doing
like a lot of hard drugs and stuff like that.
The idea here was like instead of putting them into jail,
they have to go to rehab because they probably shouldn't
be addicted to heroin. Now if all of the rehabilitation
places are full and they can't go anywhere, and now
they can't go to jail because it's decriminalized, what happens
is is you have a bunch of addicts hanging out.
Speaker 1: I shouldn't joke. It's just it's just, oh no, I
shouldn't joke.
Speaker 3: There going on.
Speaker 1: You had that like the policymakers in Portland or Oregon
were like, holy ship, way more people like drugs than
we expected. Yeah, popular, Yeah, I know the people. It's
a serious problem. It's just like they did not they
didn't correctly fathom how many people would need the rehab.
Speaker 3: They didn't fund, which is probably like bigger, bigger controversy.
But it is decriminalized I think currently as far as
I'm aware, like you can do anything. We also had
like free range on on like CBD and th HC
in your drinks. So right right now, if you're getting
a CBD soda. It probably came from a can because
it needs to be regulated, you know, like they have
to toss it in a.
Speaker 2: Mountain milligrams max. Yeah, just like.
Speaker 1: Beer, okay or wine.
Speaker 3: Five years ago in Portland they would be like, do
you want a slushy from our slushy machine. We're also
adding like two droppers of THHC into it, and we
feel like.
Speaker 2: Just loosely, just like like jungle juice, shake it up
with weed.
Speaker 3: And if they're like feeling it, they just put more
droppers in.
Speaker 2: Oh, I don't like that. I like the I like
knowing exactly how many milligrams I'm getting.
Speaker 3: That insane telling you it was the wild West. There
was a point in time, this was like before the
government recognized that you really need to regulate this ship
where Portland was just shoving it in any drink. You
could add it as a bonus. You could be like, yeah,
I'll have a you know, like I would like a
whiskey soda and put two droppers of fucking weed in
there too.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: An hour after Mary has a slushy, she's just at
the table.
Speaker 3: It did happen to me. I definitely did like accidentally
like have way too much of my like dropper or whatever.
At one point it probably happened to a lot of people,
which is probably why they regulated the shit out of it.
I just think like it's interesting because we're often the
testing grounds of what ends up happening with the rest
of the United States. So when everyone's like, it's so crazy,
like you can buy weed now, but you know you
do have to have the little fake license. You guess
that was like us like ten years ago and now
it's just like crazy over here. Yeah, you are kind
of Maybe you guys will treat it like you know,
drugs soon.
Speaker 1: Oh, speaking of drugs, I watched Dread from twenty twelve finally.
Speaker 2: Oh that's a great one.
Speaker 1: The yeah, really good movie. Daniel record, like like Giant
Bombies guys have been recommending. Well, the poster was in.
Speaker 2: The poster up there.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a good movie. Fantastic. What's the drug called?
Like it as their perception of time.
Speaker 2: I forget what it's called, but it's a very movie
drug name. Yeah, that's the video of a movie. Yeah,
that's right. It's a total video game of a movie.
Like in the best way.
Speaker 1: It's very It almost had Zack Snyder vibes, which I
don't usually like maic book comic book like uh to
put it like I had Sin City? Who did was
that Zack Snyder? I think that it had like it
definitely HD the comic book influence. But it was good.
I liked it. Okay, Yeah, it's a good movie. If
you haven't seen it, it's like an hour and a
half of cool stuff. Carl like this. It's just really
badass cop. I think we need more cop movies, is
what I'm trying to say, speaking of regulating drugs and
and more cops.
Speaker 3: More drugs.
Speaker 1: There are a lot of good drugs, more tariffs, higher percentages.
Speaker 3: No less eggs.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna put all those on my soundboard.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it'd be really good. Play it, but don't tell
anybody who is saying it.
Speaker 2: I don't know if I have that contex.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't think I have like a you can
you know when it's Jeff Grubb, you know when it's
Mike Manatti talking.
Speaker 2: I'm talking about the Glitter Day.
Speaker 1: There you go. You don't really know it's.
Speaker 2: Jack Stop in a rape Fores. What do you mean?
Speaker 1: Can you guess? Who that is? Guess who it is?
Speaker 2: Stop in a rate for Do you think it's back
al Art?
Speaker 1: I think it's Gilbert Godfrey.
Speaker 2: Who is that? It could be anyone?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't, Yeah, I don't. I think you could
play a sound by me saying more tariffs, and I
don't think people would know what it is who it is.
Speaker 2: People would not know whom sun as Jack and Off
in a rainforest cafe.
Speaker 1: No, did he do that? Was that a thing? Oh?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Nice?
Speaker 1: I have more respect for him now I have less.
That's fair.
Speaker 2: He's listening.
Speaker 1: I Mike it was low before. Does he listened fire Escape? Oh?
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, he definitely does. And Mike, he kills him
whenever we talk about like j RPGs and stuff. He
hates it.
Speaker 1: Hey, I like j RPGs. I submitted one for our
top one hundred. Marry did not include it in the
actual bracket though, which one PERSONA five and I and
Kingdom Heart? Oh? Actually, Dan, you were very taken aback
that I had Kingdom Heart. It does an honorable mention.
Speaker 2: That is fucked up.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't think you knew that I liked that game, Yeah,
the first one, not the other twelve What did you don't.
Speaker 2: Strike me as that guy? What do you like about it?
Speaker 1: It's it's like mostly nostalgia. I played it is the
nostalgia or no, no, no, no, just that game specifically the music,
the soundtrack. That game is like the most I've ever
been into Final Fantasy. No, that's not true. I like
Final Fantasy six, but that's about it. Like remake was cool.
I've not touched Rebirth yet, but I don't know something
about Kingdom Hearts the vibes of it.
Speaker 3: Well, then you should have put a higher on your list.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, I'm not saying that shouldn't been there, but
Persona five was high on my list. It was like
number fifteen for me.
Speaker 3: What's not?
Speaker 1: Yeah? It was actually where was it? Let me look,
I haven't played it five times like somebody we know, But.
Speaker 2: Well, it would have been annihilated in the first round.
Speaker 1: I don't even know. Yeah, very fair unless it went
up against I just I was.
Speaker 3: Like, if you guys feel really strongly about a game
and you're like, it's very important that it's in this show,
I was like, put it high on your list?
Speaker 1: Does this look high brow to you?
Speaker 2: What am I looking at it?
Speaker 1: It's a wine zine called Noble Rot. Look at it?
Speaker 2: A wine zine?
Speaker 1: What about this looks high brow to you?
Speaker 2: Uh, audio listener, he's got He's just got a wine zine.
That's what else to say about this? I don't know
what I'm looking at. It's essays about fucking wine with cartoons.
Speaker 3: Yeah, first of all, none of these images have wines.
I don't think it's a.
Speaker 1: Very good direct.
Speaker 2: You got a guy in an ascot drinking wine.
Speaker 1: That's Benedett Cumberbatch. Kara writes for this magazine. She's super
into wine.
Speaker 3: She's it's a zine proven anything.
Speaker 2: No, this is doing nothing.
Speaker 1: You think that doesn't look like that?
Speaker 3: That doesn't look like it's for wine.
Speaker 1: Look at those?
Speaker 2: Look at these pointing at a man's chest.
Speaker 1: It's muscles. That's a bicep. It's a big one.
Speaker 3: At some point they become boobies when that.
Speaker 2: Look at I mean, we don't need to keep looking
at your wine zines, Mike.
Speaker 1: Look at this. Look at that little person. Nobody cares
like hiking the bottom of the page. Look at this
a vineyard?
Speaker 3: What a weirdo?
Speaker 1: Wine's cool into it?
Speaker 2: Nobody don't at all. I'll take wine over Kingdom Hearts.
Speaker 3: But I think it could be cooler, and I also
think that's super fair.
Speaker 1: Yeah, no, it could. I agree, everything could be cooler.
Speaker 3: Number twenty five on your.
Speaker 2: List, it's pretty low.
Speaker 3: That's pretty much you busted out that wine zine to
distract me from your hypocrisy.
Speaker 1: Real piece of your laser focused today. Not expect that.
Speaker 3: I'm not letting you get away with it.
Speaker 2: She recommended you recommended a game and I played it,
so good side.
Speaker 1: Do we want to talk about video games now? Are
we doing?
Speaker 3: I mean, I think this is transitional and I'll tell
you why. This isn't so much about like what games
we've been playing recently. This is a game I played
last EPI and I was like, I'm actually surprised with
how much I liked it. It was completely shocking and
like daring. I think it's a bit controversial, but I
think it's I think it's great and I really recommend it.
And it was called my side and I was like,
I don't think Dan will probably play this, but I
was like, I do recommend that Dan play it. And
so when we finished recording the episode, Dan dm me
and said, I actually do have like time, I don't
need to go to bed yet I am feeling it.
So I might stream this game. And I went, oh
my god, if you stream this game, I will sit
in chat and I will watch it with you. And
I said, just promise me that you like won't quit immediately.
There are some like wai Fu because that's the that's
like the hook of this game is that it's like
it's it's joking that maybe you're like playing a waif
fu sim game.
Speaker 1: But Dan wouldn't like, but you think that he would
like it. It's about you have.
Speaker 3: To get past that part. So a promise me you'll
at least play like fifteen twenty minutes. And he was like, okay,
well you boots this game up. I don't know, like Dan,
you want to explain your experience. But like I'm in
chat the whole time going like, please don't quit, please
do not quit.
Speaker 2: I didn't. I went for longer than I said I would.
Speaker 3: You did go for longer than you said you would.
There were some risky things, there was also stuff you liked,
like cutting the vegetables, like the oh yeah.
Speaker 2: Like a mini game. Yeah yeah.
Speaker 3: The game has a lot of mini games where like
this wife Fu girl is like, come into this game
with me, and you like literally get sucked into the
game and she's like, help me cook, and she's like,
play it. Play a game with me. Play play like
this shitty little like fake console game with me. And
it was funny because you won, even though she's supposed
to get like a lot better at the game, but
you actually you're not gonna go easy on. Yeah, you
moved her as yeah, I know what I'm doing. She's cute,
but there were parts where you were like getting really concerned.
I think this one point she was like she was like,
let's go into my bedroom, and you were like, I'm
not going to jail, and everyone in chat, myself included,
were like yelling like you have to go into the bedroom.
It's a part of the experience of this game. You're
you're not going to go to jail, like you're not
going to get in trouble. But you were like very
apprehensive because she kept it's the illusion that maybe there's
like something weird or pervy going on, but it doesn't.
Nothing happens. You play this game. You did a good job,
and I respect your choices, but my problem here is
like there's this very iconic clip, and I do think
we should clip it of your stream where something is
rattling in her dresser or stand up dresser right, and
it feels not good, like there's something wrong, and she's like,
don't ignore my dresser and play this game with me,
and you're like okay. But everyone, you, the audience, everyone
were like looking at the dresser. Something's going on. Why
is it rattling? Why is it shaking? Like, what's going on?
And so you finally stand up and you walk up
to the dresser and you put your hand out to
open it and she gets in the way. She just
stop it. How dare you invade my privacy? That's where
I keep my underwear and you shut the game down
without without a second thought.
Speaker 2: I forgot what it was that made me shut the
game down. But that checks out.
Speaker 1: That is literally weird.
Speaker 3: I'm here and everyone in chat goes no, no, no,
That's that's the moment.
Speaker 1: Where it's not really good.
Speaker 2: I'm not looking at some anime girls underwear. I'm not
doing that. You get a patty wagon that's not having
It's just.
Speaker 3: You don't want it. You don't get yeah, carried away.
Speaker 2: You're going to miss no I don't the forty year
old buried man. I'm not looking at the anime and
your pants.
Speaker 3: That's what happens when you break the law. The cops
come and throw you in a panty wagon.
Speaker 1: No, not it where the phrase comes from? What is
in her dresser that she's hiding? I don't know.
Speaker 2: I got the fuck out of there.
Speaker 3: It's a really big spoiler, but it's kind of where
the game takes a dark twist.
Speaker 1: Oh, Dann's stomach some underwear. Yeah.
Speaker 3: The concept of this game is that it starts like
a cute little wife ou sim but it gets really dark,
and that's I think, what's so interesting about it. But
the more I say, the more it spoils all of
the twists and turns of this game. So what was
such a bummer is that Dan got through all of
the like mini games of cutting carrots and vegetables and
playing games with his like little WIFEU girlfriend, and then
the second she said underwear.
Speaker 2: He was like, ah, look you give me some marioware
cooking mom of many games. I'm game to go along
with that. But if you start talking about underpants in
an anime game.
Speaker 3: But Princess Peach is like stay away from my undie drawer.
You're like, I hate this game out of ten.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Princess Peach started talking about her pennies, I would
disavow Mario.
Speaker 1: Yeah right, you jay it.
Speaker 2: I would have major issues at Princess Peach in the
Switch to Mario game was like, check out my penties.
I'd be like, I don't know what happened to Memoto.
This isn't the Miamoto. I know the Switch to.
Speaker 1: Direction that's the launch game next to Mario Kart. Whatever
is Princess Peaches panties panty raid.
Speaker 3: To catch them?
Speaker 2: Not doing metric for playing the Panty Princess game.
Speaker 1: And the sequel, Jack Off Mario.
Speaker 2: Look, if Jack Off Mario is a switch to Launch game,
that will be bold in a way.
Speaker 1: I would that they're kind of you know the haptics. Yeah,
it's an HD translation and it means something different. Yeah,
really translation.
Speaker 3: I have done this in the mini games and enjoyed it.
Speaker 2: But let's check an episode in Mario Party. That's totally innocent.
I'm not whacking off Mario.
Speaker 3: All the time, totally innocent. I think that like we're
skirting a line here, and I don't think her saying
she's gaslighting you. In that scene, she's saying, don't go
in there. That's where I keep my panties to prevent
you from wanting to go in there.
Speaker 1: It worked.
Speaker 2: I would leave, I would leave the facility and call
the police off. That happened.
Speaker 3: But that's how she tricked you, because there was there
was something in there that was worth seeing.
Speaker 1: It wasn't're easy easily manipulated dance.
Speaker 3: She manipulated you, and she she won. I think you
should boot it up again. Manipulated, and I think you
should open up the closet and see what's in there.
Speaker 2: Nope, already on insult. I gave it a shot. I
did what I said I was gonna do.
Speaker 1: They burned it in the backyard at FBI.
Speaker 3: I just wanted to let you know that the soon
as she brought up panties, I have deleted this game.
Speaker 2: And I did two rosaries. I called the FBI. I
did everything I was supposed to do.
Speaker 1: Dan gets taken to guantanamo because he continues playing the game. Yeah,
people get thrown in there for less.
Speaker 2: That's true. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Uh let's yeah, let's talk like torture and tariffs and uh.
Speaker 2: Things.
Speaker 1: Yeah, talk about games? Do you want to talk about
the games? All right, we're back. What we're saying, you're
just about to like talk shit about someone because you
didn't know I was coming back yet from the break.
What were we saying, Yeah, yeah, go ahead, tell the people,
tell the people, MIKENI Oh no, Mike, I do too.
Speaker 2: He's like one of my favorite people, so do I.
Speaker 1: But you were just talking about him, Mary? What were
we saying? All right, so we talked about my side,
I mean the clitoris and that we talked about the clitorists. Okay,
I'm very curious. I have ac Shadows downloaded, Dan, I
believe have you both tried it?
Speaker 3: I've tried it, but I'm only two hours in.
Speaker 2: I'm like, that's a decent.
Speaker 3: You're the one, and then I have questions for you
because I'm enjoying it so far, but I'm very early in.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm excited to try it.
Speaker 2: I I historically have greatly disliked the Assassin's Creed serious.
The only one I liked enough to beat was the
second one, and even then I thought that was like,
that's a good eight out of ten game. It kept
my interest. There wasn't a lot else that I wanted
to play at the time. So I don't love it,
but it's you know whatever. And I haven't even really
touched the last couple, like just the settings, and it
was like grease and stuff just I don't know big
axes and Viking stuff. Didn't that's not really my thing.
So this one being like, oh, okay, it's like more
like a like Ninja, you know, Shanobi type stuff. It's like, oh,
I'll give this a try here. It's always liked the
idea of that to like I remember like Tenshu back
in the day and being like, oh, I'll just sneak
around on rooftops and throw you know, sharrikins and stab people.
But I suck at stealth and I've always hated the
assassin's screed style of stealth. There were so many just
like instant fail type shit. And when I started up Shadows,
you know, I always look at the options of everything,
got to turn off motion blur on everything. I saw
there was separate difficulty sliders for combat and stealth, and
I was like, oh, okay, cause I like combat and
I'm good at combat. Stealth I don't like it. I'm
not good at and so I saw when you bring
it down, it's like, oh, so enemies will take longer
to react to stuff, basically saying like, hey, they're gonna
be dumber. You can sneak up on these motherfuckers and
just stabbing way easier. And I'm like, that sounds great,
that sounds perfect you.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry, I just fucking love the guy who doesn't
like stealth in his back.
Speaker 2: I heard your solid I heard a million times. But
also I second stealth in the Metal Gear games too.
I just like the story up.
Speaker 1: That'll not gonna beat it that horse. Sorry.
Speaker 3: I think that Dan is like it's compartmentalizing because he
has PTSD from some kind of wartime trauma, and so
he's gotten really good at putting certain parts of his
brain in a box.
Speaker 2: And I don't talk about Korea.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you can have thoughts that should not align, and
they can both be Dan.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's a complex human being. I agree you were
talking about shadows. Stealth has separate sliders. I think Valhalla
and Odyssey had that as well.
Speaker 2: Okay, but those seemed especially boring even for Assassin's screen
like the setting. I just I just something about the
big axes and ship like I'm sure you can get
swords and stuff. I don't know that just Viking.
Speaker 1: Ship and all that Valhalla specifically. Sure he was grease,
completely different millennium.
Speaker 2: Probably it's their neighbors, Like I don't know the same
thing analization from.
Speaker 1: Nasty neighbors in any sense time or geographically.
Speaker 2: History major, Yeah, I'm sure they're wine Field didn't interlink.
Speaker 1: I'm not a history major. I just played both games,
not talking.
Speaker 2: Out of my ass because I don't know what I'm
talking about.
Speaker 3: One of his books back there gave all this insight.
Speaker 2: Yep, I guess I'm just trying to say that Ninjas
seem cool, yes, and the other stuff didn't seem cool tonight.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I agree Ninjas and US is samurai correct?
Speaker 2: Well? Yeah, And like I played ten hours, and like
I played as the guy for like the very beginning,
and then you switch to the Ninja lady very quickly,
and it's like, oh man, hell, I'm super mobile, and
like I got this grappling hook, and like it actually
felt really good. Like I used to hate the climbing
mechanics of Assassin's Creed. I felt like that just the
controls never did exactly what you want them to do.
I'd hop off buildings without meaning to and all this shit.
It all just works the way you want to do here.
It's just like, okay, hold forward an X and you're
gonna do a bunch of cool hopping up climbing stuff
and grappling, hook swing. All that stuff all felt great.
Stabbing dudes awesome. A lot of good physics stuff, like
all the destructible like boxes and bamboo and stuff. Everything
was just kind of like tickling my brain in the
right way. It's like, oh shit, I might actually like
like this Assassin' Screed game.
Speaker 3: And the slicing of the uh there's like baskets of stuff,
and when you're killing people with your samurai sword, if
you slice through a basket, slices down at this like
fun angle, like it really was sliced with a sword,
not you know what I mean. It doesn't just cut
in half or explode. It looks sliced through with a sword.
It's but that's fun like that in the little details
to make you feel like you're throwing a sword around totally.
Speaker 2: Like there's those little satisfying things that just like you
wouldn't expect, not like a scripted thing. It's just like,
oh man, okay, I just dove through this paper door
and stabbed a dude, and like that type of shit's
really fun. And then there were stuff I was really
appreciating too, where it's like I would just be running
around exploring and I would see like some dudes that
had like enemy health bars, and I don't even kill
these dudes, don't know what their deal is, and I
would kill them and it would do the big like
flourish where it's like you killed this high ranking guy
that it helped murder your family or what ever. It's like,
oh shit, and to the like objective screen, and it wasn't.
I wasn't even like tracking a quest. I just found
a dude and he looked evil and I killed him,
and I was like, oh shit, that's awesome. And it
reminded me of.
Speaker 3: Like mercenary to kill everybody, you know, Oh, I was
just killing everyone.
Speaker 1: There is that that sounds almost like the fact that
there was supposed to be this gravitas around the kill
and there wasn't almost sounds bad.
Speaker 2: No, I think it's awesome because it's like I like
that about an open world game where it's like, sure
you can follow the quest and everything and get all
the story stuff and then wind up killing him. But
in real life, like you know, sometimes you just run
across an evil guy and well, I guess that doesn't
happen in real life.
Speaker 1: But I think parents is my point. Okay, no, no, no, right,
I'm really not trying to show on this. I I like,
I'm excited to play this and I've played every single
Assassin's Creed, every single one. I love this series.
Speaker 2: But do you play like Mercenaries Playground of Destruction?
Speaker 1: Have I played Mercenaries player? I am Mercenary? Have I? Okay?
Speaker 2: Okay, all right, I figured it seems like a my game. Okay, yeah,
all right, So what you know the Deck of fifty
two thing, and it's like the same thing. You could
be like just driving around the mountains or in a
helicopter's like oh shit, there's the Jack of Spades and
you go down there and you crash a helicopter in
his head and kill them. That they gave me that
type of feeling like I can just find these guys
in the world and kill them.
Speaker 1: That's good.
Speaker 2: And so yeah, that's that's all to say that. Like
for the opening hours, there was just a lot of
stuff that I was like, oh shit, this is clever,
this is cool, like it's clearly a very well made game.
But I also was knowing the whole time that like, oh,
as soon as something comes along, like right now, I'm
not I don't have any new games I'm playing. Really,
as soon as something does come around, I'm gonna probably
drop this and fall off and not come back, like
I wasn't hooked on that level. And sure enough, this
game that we'll talk about on the next episode came along,
and I was like, well, this is all I'm playing now,
and I look back at it now and it's like, yes,
I do think Shadows is one of the best assassin's
screens I've played. But at the same time, a lot
of the stuff I don't like about the series, namely
it's just dry and boring, and like I don't give
a fuck about any of these characters or anytime there's
a cut scene, it's just like, these are the most
boring fucking characters I can imagine, even though Ninja's are
cool and the setting's cool and everything, it's just like, uh,
like I hated the voice acting, the English voice acting,
and then I switched it to immersive mode, which is
like a mix of the actual like Portuguese and Japanese
and stuff, and that helped a lot, But like still,
the actual story and the characters were just boring me
to tears. So I don't know if I'll be going back,
but I will say that like I did not I'm
not even saying I didn't hate it. I'm gonna say
I did enjoy it. I think it's a good game.
I just don't think I'm gonna go back to it.
Speaker 1: Are they doing a good job of encouraging you to
play as both characters? Are you just sticking to that
come back?
Speaker 2: I've only had I saw the guy at the very beginning,
during like a tutorial, and then I've been now a
or you know, the girl for like eight plus hours
and has not even mentioned the dude again. I can't
It's not a GTA swap back to him type thing yet.
I don't know. Maybe he does want to go back
to them.
Speaker 1: Yeah, because I liked I love Assassin's Creed Syndicate the
London Industrial Revolution one with Jacob and Evie brother and sister.
That was super cool because you could.
Speaker 3: Choose which story you were watching based on which one
you were swapping too, and.
Speaker 1: That that was more of a case of they both
function the same way. Their animations were just very different.
He was more brute forest brass knuckle kind of stuff.
She was like acrobatic and stab in between specific ribs
kind of fighting. But I was curious. I had seen
in previews that use the case, for instance, cannot crawl
through small holes like she can. Have you encountered artificial
stuff like that? That's like, oh, he can't do this
very menial thing.
Speaker 2: Hard to say considering I haven't played at them, or rather.
Speaker 1: I guess in your case, have you seen anything that
she can't do that he supposedly can?
Speaker 3: I know that she can. Can he grapple because when
we played is Him, all he did was fight sequences,
And she's the one who is acrobatic and has the
grapple and the ability to like tiptoe and like swan
dive and stuff like that. So I would be surprised
if they have a grapple for him, But maybe they do,
oh like the grappling.
Speaker 2: Hook then yeah, oh yeah.
Speaker 3: It's like her thing is silent Assassin. That's like her
whole mobile bag and every time we play him, it's
like you're in so you're in war, can't go kill
all these people? Well, and you just throw your sword around.
Speaker 1: Like maces and shit, too right, I've seen he gets
like these like long sticks.
Speaker 3: Later on, Yeah, he has heavier and I think he's
like more about there's like a perry system and stuff
to make sure that.
Speaker 1: Uh.
Speaker 3: But what I found was interesting is like when you're
when you're doing combat as him, it's like, here's how
you perry, here's like how you dodge. Just make sure.
And then as soon as you play as her, they
were like, if you see this red light, that means
it's an unpariable right attack, you have to dodge it.
And that was not shown with the guy.
Speaker 2: So he's more brude force like and yeah, yeah, okay.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but I I but today point we haven't. We
haven't played as I swear. You play as the guy
for like the first thirty minutes and you kill a
bunch of people, and then I played as the girl
the rest of the time, and I really liked her.
But she has a totally different combat style and she's
much more focused on, you know, dance up this wall,
get behind them, and then stab them in the neck,
and that's what she'd like, that's her thing.
Speaker 1: But you you sorry if you said this already. Have
either of you gotten to the point where you can
switch at will if you want.
Speaker 2: To help you? No, I literally have not seen the guys.
The first thirty minutes.
Speaker 1: I thought you were doing that choice.
Speaker 2: No I did. Yeah, the game has not acknowledged that man.
Speaker 3: For like Tanna, it's all about her and her mask journey.
She's trying to get this mask. She's very upset about it.
Every time she's riding her horse, they always add in,
you know, dead in the little horse pieces of Oh
the horse is actually quite effective. You are fast on
this horse. It's really fun to to be able to
ride a horse. But when you're riding a distance, they'll
always say something and she's always like, I've got to
get that mask back, and it's just like I know
I'm the one who's playing this. Usually when there's like
a dialogue in horse riding in a game, it's to
add color commentary, right like between characters that you can
learn more about them and their hat past and their
history or like their dynamic. But in this game, her
her horse commentary is like as I have said previously,
I have to get this mask back. It's very important.
It's like, yeah, I fucking know.
Speaker 2: That I don't a mask at all. What I thought
they just like killed your dad or something.
Speaker 1: The moon's falling to Earth and you got three days
to beat the game.
Speaker 2: Oh I see. Yeah, I was gonna say, Oh, I
wonder if they're not saying it as much with me,
or if I just forgot. I probably just forgot.
Speaker 3: It's the second at Yeah, you're probably like, we're looking
at you know, blue sky, and then the cut scene
had ended, and you like the game.
Speaker 1: I'm so popular.
Speaker 2: No, I'm not a phone game guy. I'm really not.
Speaker 1: No, I know, to your credit, you you don't. You're
not like a on listening to podcasts while you watch movies.
You're very attentive with with movies, but with games.
Speaker 2: Actually, honestly, with with this that was so boring, and
I did give such zero ships about the story that
I did wind up like listening to podcasts and stuff
and just running around, jumping up buildings and finding treasure
chests and stuff.
Speaker 3: I do like jumping around, though. I think I think
it is a really well made The scene I played
with the girl, which is by the way to get
the mask back. It's the very first thing you do
with her. Dnne Okay, well, I think it was extremely
well designed. The space was designed for you to play
and be able to like hop, skip and jump your
way through the building. That feels good to you. I
don't think it was obvious. There's always like this commentary
about like white paint, right like like where you want
them to go. S game does not do that, but
it uses really good visual cues where it's like, so
when you get to the first building, there's two giant
guards of the building that are like, you're not coming
in here, and it's like, okay, I guess I'm not
going in there. And so you look around the building
and there's just these boards against the building, and it's like,
I'm a ninja. I bet I can run against those boards. Again,
there's no white paint. There's nothing like very glaringly obvious.
It's just a visual cue that I think is for
the average gamer. You're gonna be like, I'm a ninja,
I bet I can do that, and sure is shit,
you absolutely can. There'll be these pillars throughout the location
where it's like, again there's no color or like lighting cues.
It's just you're a ninja. I bet I could jump
from pillar to pillar really delicately, and sure, is shit,
you absolutely can. It gave you really nice, delicate ways
of guiding you through the space, but did not feel forced,
didn't feel like it was telling me what to do.
I just felt like I was playing in the space
and being really cool, fun ninja the whole time. I
think they I think they handled that first area like
it was designed impeccable, and.
Speaker 2: They had that across the whole open world, Like I
remember having that thought when there's like these big pirate
ships in the ocean. I don't know if you went there,
but like you can climb on you can climb up
to the very top of these masks and all this stuff,
and the pirate ships are conveniently close enough to where
you could jump from like the top of a mask
onto like you know, the board on another one. And
it's like but like Mary said, it's not like, hey,
check you should jump from ship to ship. It's just like, oh,
I bet I could, And then it's like, yep, all right,
I thought of that. That's cool. Like the park corset
does feel pretty great in this game.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think it's it's been constructed in a way
that for the first time in a long time, I
feel like it's encouraging you to play with the space
design and run around like a fun little ninja that
you are. I did not want to be discovered. One
time I was accidentally discovered, and I actually I restarted
because I was like, I don't want to fight my
way through this space. It is more fun for me
to acrobatically dance around this space. And that really was
a joy for me to just like run around and
use my zip line or whatever it is I could
to like get through the different areas, and it does
encourage you. There'll be some cues. One of them was like, hey,
you'll be able to see people better if you get
to a high advantage point. So I was like, all right,
if you look around the space just like the ship,
you will find the highest piece of wood that they
want you to clearly climb. And then they have a
bagging system just like metal gear. We can like tag
all the enemies so that you know where it ought
to go. Because you'll be discovered once you do all
that stuff. I feel like they've given you enough tools
where you can be sneaky. I did not alter the
game's settings, and I figured it out, like I don't
think I'm the most sneaky person either, Dan, And they
gave me enough where I could do it without getting discovered,
and that felt really good for me.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I appreciate the level of like accessibility stuff
and you know, just combat and like the options, Like
more options are never a bad thing, And I was
impressed at the suite they give you in this.
Speaker 3: I agree. I think people are really liking it. I'm
gonna be playing it some more. It's kind of taken
place of a vowed right now for me because it's
it's my console game of choice. Right now I'm gonna play.
I'm gonna play a lot more of it. I owe
a lot more of it, and I am looking forward
to it.
Speaker 1: Uh, Elephant in the room. Yeah, I think there's like
discourse online going around about oh, like Ghost of Sushima
already did this. Better half of me is like, I
think they kind of shot themselves in the foot. You'd
be soft way back in the day when Alex Hutchinson
was like, oh Japan's too obvious or whatever, Like I
think that sets them back of it too obvious. But
also I think there's more room. There's room enough for
more than one open world game.
Speaker 2: So different to me too, Like I.
Speaker 1: Love, for the record, I love Ghost Sushima, and I'm
not saying I can't enjoy this as well. I'm saying,
is there any like it does it's doing, it's separating
itself from that different I.
Speaker 2: Mean, there's a lot of just Assassin screed shit in
this where it's like you were climbing tall temples and
stuff like that that like, you know, I don't remember
the amount of like vertical mobility in Sushima that this has.
Speaker 1: It's more for sure.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, It's just it's got a different vibe to it.
I think, I I think I probably prefer Sushima. But yeah,
it doesn't. This doesn't feel like, oh, it's just another
one of those.
Speaker 1: Cool I Like I said, I could very well like
them both. I'm going to play Shadows tonight if I
get time, because I really like I like Assassin's Creed.
I've been There's even been titles I've kind of been
an apologist about. I did not like val HeLa whatsoever.
I got bored to death. I liked Odyssey, but it
got overloaded activities. Bloated Origins is my favorite Assassin's creed
of all time, So like, I'm curious to see what
they do with this new chapter.
Speaker 3: While we're comparing two games, do you mind if I
transition to a game that I keep comparing to another game?
Speaker 1: Go for it?
Speaker 3: So I'm finally playing. I think it's called split Back Sweciction.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I wrote it as split Faction because I cannot remember.
Speaker 1: I was trying to remember the game I read that.
I was like, wait, what the fuck is the name?
I know that's wrong.
Speaker 3: It's such a memorable title. So Dan, you played this
last EPI and you were talking about how you were
actually really enjoying it. You played as pigs who fart
and stuff like that, and you said it was like
really creative. So I was excited about it. So I
also got this game and have been playing it. I
have to be three fourths through this game. I feel
very feel like I've almost beaten this game. Have you
beaten the game? I'm just curious, Like what, No.
Speaker 2: Bonk was a GDC for like a week, so we
had to take you know, I don't think i've played
since last time I talked about it. We are going
to go back to it. But yeah, yeah, you're beyond
me at this point.
Speaker 3: Oh okay, great, Well, I just I've had a little bit
of a different experience than you. I I do think
that it is creative, and I think it's really interesting
that you can play in lots of different spaces, Like
you're in sci fi. Then you're like in this like
magical farm with giant vegetables that is actually quite cute.
I got to this area with like giant giants and
you're running between their hands, so they like come and
scoop you up with their fingers and you like jump
between giants, which it visually looks cool. And right now
I'm in a fantasy area where like I'm a fairy
and the other person is like a I'm going to say,
like a sea otter, and so like they're doing stuff
in the water and I can fairy around half fly,
I guess.
Speaker 2: And just the one where there's like the bamboo things
and like the ocean thing can like move you while
you're holding out of the bamboo and you're going through
a river. Does that sound familiar?
Speaker 3: It's I don't know if I'm seeing I don't know
if I can place exactly what you're visually saying. But
there is a point where, like the otter is like
moving my stuff in the water so that I can
get past brambles and like nets and like stuff. I
don't think it's an ocean, it's it's like an underwater cave.
So okay, okay, anyway, I think there's some really cool,
interesting stuff that this game is doing. I do really
like that you can play into very different environments, right
like sci fi changing it up to fantasy. It helps
with our attention spans that every time I'm like okay,
I feel like I've seen enough of this future dystopia
that it shoves me into a different world. So I
think that is nice. But I think I'm a bit
of a hater because this aime isn't really doing any
of these areas extremely well. I think because we're playing
in these areas for a short period of time, by
the time you really recognize that there's invisible walls everywhere,
that it's kind of janky that you could like fall
through the tomatoes or like the game doesn't want you
to do very specific things, and the mechanically you're very limited.
It's telling you literally what to do in every scene.
By the time you're like okay, I I feel like
I've seen it, they shove you in a new environment
that you get to explore and think, I think it's
tricking you into thinking that you have a lot of
agency in this space, but you literally have none.
Speaker 2: I guess Devil's advocate on that point, because like, I
do agree with you in that, like it is very simple,
Like the controls are very much like, Okay, in this area,
you have you know, your R two does this, and
then you can just basically jump and dash. You know,
there's not a lot complicating going on. But I have
to think that that would be kind of by design,
considering it's supposed to be a game that, like you
have to play co op and I'm a lot of
people are bringing in friends or significant others and stuff
that are not maybe normally wouldn't play games, would be like, oh,
let's play this game together. And like, I think the
kind of simplified controls and stuff probably help with that.
But it doesn't mean you're wrong about what you're saying there.
Like it is, it's not a complicated game by any means.
It's just kind of a roller coaster ride of just
like now this, now, this is happening. Now that's happening.
Speaker 3: Don't forget to shoot the balloons. Yeah, like it's it's
constantly telling you what to do, so you feel really
busy and really valued both players at any skill level,
And I will, I will acknowledge I think you are
right that I think this is for lots of people
at varying skill levels, so that you could play this
with your younger brother, you could play this with like
your girlfriend who like kind of is cool with your game,
you know, hobby, but might not really want to play this,
and you're like, this is a good in. I think
this is a good in as someone who like plays
a lot of games and gets a thrill out of
being able to play a game with another person co op.
I think that there are other games that do this
so tr tremendously better. That it's just a bit of
a bummer to play this and have these very simple
puzzle designs spoon fed to me in between like kind
of gimmicky spaces where I don't actually get the full
breath of being able to play and enjoy. I think
that Portal two walked so that this game.
Speaker 2: Could crawl interesting.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think there are other games that are doing
it way better, and I.
Speaker 2: Think it's a bummert. I definitely prefer Portal too.
Speaker 3: It's a fucking decade old, you know what I mean.
Like this, we keep saying like, can you believe this
games for two people? And I'm like, yeah, I actually can.
There's a lot of games that do that. So, like,
I don't think it's like this extraordinary innovative thing. I
think that the idea that this game is getting this
high praise for doing it. Maybe it's because it's doing
it in such a handholdy way that we feel like
everyone can participate and partake. But I think maybe it's hook.
Speaker 2: I think the thing is that that couch co op,
which people misuse that term all the time. They think
it's any time it's the same room. It's not co op. No,
this is legitimately, couch co op is not a thing
as much anymore. He used to so be a thing,
you know, all through the eight and sixteen bit and
beyond era, Like there is so much that And I
think since you kind of got online games and stuff
like that, and you know, multiplayer shooters and all that stuff,
I think the idea of multiplayer is less. Oh I'm
sitting down and playing. Contrast my friend on the same couch.
I think it is almost a throwback to like, okay,
me and my friend or me and my wife are
sitting on the couch playing together. And I think that's
why it's gotten so much attention, because it is. It's
doing it very well at like a high level, you know,
production wise, and there's just not a lot. I everything
you're saying is true. I mean, I don't think it.
Speaker 3: Is compared to the other games of its magnitude. I
think that if you want to play a game with
your little niece who's not very good at games, I
would recommend ray Man Legends, which is extremely good for
both levels of play and is extraordinary designed to have
co opic experiences with other people where you can have fun.
I think that there are like Mario games that do
us extraordinarily better.
Speaker 2: But even like Raymond Legends, you know, like that was
over a decade ago. I think, you know, so that
that's all just that's right. I don't think there's.
Speaker 3: Been so much room for improvement in a decade. I
I just I think I am disappointed that, like the
fact that they're making these So Okay, I hear your point.
I think what I'm saying is is like this game
is getting a lot of praise that it's doing something
that games aren't doing anymore, which I think means there
is a hole in the market for co op games
that we should be filling.
Speaker 2: I agree.
Speaker 3: I am in agreement with that. I would love way
more co op games to be in the market. I
think that this game is like really limited with what
it's doing, but I can see why everybody's obsessed with it,
and I think it's because it's doing something that everybody
wishes they could be doing more with their friends, which
is just like playing games together and enjoying like a
nice co op experience.
Speaker 2: That's fair. Yeah, I think that's totally fair.
Speaker 3: Okay, that's it.
Speaker 2: That's my ultimate way. Yeah, I'm not like, you know,
I think it's a very really.
Speaker 3: The story sucks and they're acting as such. Sorry, I
don't think it's they're acting. I think the writing is
like so exhausting. They fucking did it again. Instead of
having two people who are getting a divorce, which is
like Jesus Christ, dude, now it's two women who have
complete opposite writing styles and don't respect each other, and
so you know, they'll be in one of their worlds
and the other one will be like you wrote this,
like are you okay, and it's just like, okay, well,
I don't like her for saying that. And then they'll
be in the other girls world and she'll be like, hey,
did you write this about like needing to owe money
because something's going on in your real life? And the
girl's like, no, no, I don't know anybody money, And
it's just like, that's fucked up that both of these characters.
It's fucked up that you wrote.
Speaker 2: That that, Like do you live in the country, you idiot?
Speaker 1: You live in you idiot.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like country bumpkin versus like city girl who
owes money to a financial investor or something like that.
And it's so obvious what they're doing, but.
Speaker 2: It's incredibly on the nose and obvious. And yeah, I
will not defend the writing at all. I just yeah,
it's just that roller coaster co op thing. I do
like it a lot, but I'm also not going to like,
you know, die on the split fiction hill or anything
like that, like be my top ten or anything.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna complete it. I think it's I think it's
doing its job, and I do enjoy playing with other people.
I think this is going to be just like the
other one, where it's like I suspect that this is
going to be like one of these things where everyone's like,
this is a game of a generation, everybody needs to
play this, and I'm like, I don't. I don't agree.
I don't think this is like super monumental. I think
it's showing us. And now, like with this conversation, I
feel really confident in saying like this is just showing
us that there's a gap in the market. We should
be making more games that we can enjoy playing with
our buds casually on a couch. But like Jesus, can
someone else try this one? But Joseph, I I do
think he does a decent job at it. I just
think I think that the amount of value we're placing
in these games is too damn high.
Speaker 2: Oh, I'm totally with you, and like it takes too
I had a lot of fun ideas and stuff, but
by the end, Bunk and I were like, all right,
this is going on too long. And then like when
one Game of the Year and stuff like, oh boy,
that was fun for a bit, but that is a
game of the year, is crazy, you know.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we all had the same reaction to It Takes two,
which was like, that was a great experience. It ain't
gonna be in our top ten. Yeah, same, Yeah.
Speaker 2: No, I think we were closer than a may seem
on our opinion on this.
Speaker 1: Yeah, what's et.
Speaker 2: Et for the Atari twenty six? Based on the Steven
Spielberg film Transition?
Speaker 3: Wait, the original et from like thteen Dickity two.
Speaker 2: Yep, the one that was so bad and they had
to bury it in a landfill. Famously, it's stuck in
like a hole? Right, oh, so many holes. I got
stuck in a billion holes. Well, it started as a
Blake club game, and I'd beat.
Speaker 1: Those who don't know that is the Giant Bomb Show
where they like just play.
Speaker 2: The worst games of all time. Yeah, and I got
stuck with e T. It's the worst game I've ever beaten, for.
Speaker 3: Sure, No, you beat it.
Speaker 1: It is.
Speaker 2: It's very short. It's just it's impossible to figure out
what the fuck you're supposed to do, and you're just
non stop falling into holes and it sucks ass. It
looks like shit, it's an old.
Speaker 3: Titar game emulated emulator or did you play it on?
Speaker 2: I played through Grubbs sent me one of those Atari
twenty six D like the new It's basically like the
NES classic where you're like HD. So I played with
an Atari joystick. Okay, I played on the actual cart
so I. Actually it wasn't emulated. It was the cart
of ET. It is a piece of shit. Uh fast forward?
Uh you know, six five or six days after that
Blake Club episode, I am currently the number ten speed
runner of that game in the world.
Speaker 3: What nobody else wants to play it? I finish this game.
Speaker 2: There's not a ton but I am number ten in
the world at speed running ET. I did.
Speaker 1: Going on that and move up.
Speaker 2: I don't intend to play.
Speaker 3: The game some more?
Speaker 1: Are you? I know? I did? I did.
Speaker 2: It's not good, but it's a funny thing to me
to be one of the ten best in the world
at So that's where I'm at now with ET the Extraterrestrial.
Speaker 3: How long is it to be?
Speaker 2: My last time was under two minutes. Oh oh yeah,
one minute forty three seconds is my number ten world?
Speaker 1: How did you fill the number one?
Speaker 2: Number one is let me see the percent know RNG
manipulation leader board is fifty nine seconds, so only one
person in the world is done under a minute.
Speaker 3: Oh you could do that.
Speaker 2: You should do this fucking game.
Speaker 3: It's not my time.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there, get in there, sop it up. Fucking like
how I don't fully understand how you even beat in
two minutes.
Speaker 2: It's just very random. There's like six map screens and
you have to go around and not fall in holes,
which is the hardest part, and then you have to
like randomized you have to get three pieces of your
fucking phone and you have to e T phone home,
but then you have to like to call the spaceship.
There can't be any other characters on the screen, so
that's just random basically. And then when the clock counts
down for the spaceship to come down, it will only
come down if there's no other characters on the screen.
So it's a lot of just like randomly finding these
three phone pieces and then hoping there aren't an FBI
agent or a scientist on the screen when the spaceship
comes down. It fucking sucks.
Speaker 1: So that leaderboy that says no RANG manipulation, do they
just mean they didn't just restart immediately when they got
a bad No, you can do that.
Speaker 2: But the thing is, you can guarantee the same layout
of where the phone pieces are if you start the
first frame when the game starts up. So if you
turn on the atari wire like holding in the button,
you can guarantee the same seed each time. So it's like,
I know this piece is here, this piece is here,
this piece is here. So you can't do that for
the leader ward, I'm on, how do.
Speaker 3: You know that that guy didn't do it?
Speaker 1: You think?
Speaker 2: I mean, all the videos have to be on speed
run dot com so you can see, like if it's
on the title screen for even half a second, again,
they're not doing or org.
Speaker 3: That makes sense. Yeah, it's interesting. I love the speed
running community. They's so crazy and like they the levels
of obsession and interest. It intrigues me greatly. And all
the rules that they create because they don't want people
cheating to get these top scores. To me, the number
one person just literally played this game for a very
very long time until they got super lucky.
Speaker 2: So yeah, it's a it's an infuriating thing to do,
but it's it's very fun when you succeed.
Speaker 3: It's in there, Dan, it's under a minute.
Speaker 2: Ruin your life? Yeah, yeah, what.
Speaker 3: Else are you doing?
Speaker 1: What is uh? What's wander Stop? So you wrote it?
You wrote it. Your order is dumb because I wrote
it after on the list it's below this other game.
But then in parentheses you said talk about this before
the game instead of just rearranging.
Speaker 3: Well, that was just to make sure you were paying attention.
I mean, like I wanted you.
Speaker 1: I'm always on my What's wander Stop? And I will
not ask about spilled yet?
Speaker 3: Such a good transition. Wander Stop is the new game
by I hope I say that Davy Redden, Okay, this
Stanley Parable and the Beginner's Guide. This is like a
person who like is a very creative writer, but a
very different game than Stanley Parable or The Beginner's Guide,
very different than all of the games that the studio that,
like the studio heads have made previously. This game is
about making tea straight up. You are a angry killer
who like has a sword and a vendetta, and you're like,
I have to win and I have to kill all
these people, but you're like overworking yourself and freaking out mentally.
There's a lot of dial I was, to be fair,
this is just my vibe and Dan, I think you'll agree.
It's just very talky for like a beginning of a game.
Speaker 2: I I've seen.
Speaker 3: Lots of talkie to be able to explain her mental anguish,
her like frustration with like not being at the level
that she wants to be at, her like disappointment, or
of her own expectations of herself. And so the beginning
of this game is like a straight up twenty minute
narrative overview of why she is so fucked in the head.
It helps paint a picture. I do not like twenty
minutes of dialogue, so it really it was a bit
draining for me. But eventually, essentially what happens is like
you're you burn out, you freak out, and you you
get helped by this dude who makes tea, and he
like takes you back to his coffee shop and he's like,
why don't you just relax for a little bit, I'll
show you how to make tea. My character hates this.
The dialogue options are a little rude. It'll give me
three options and he'll be like, do you want me
to show you how to make tea? And my options
will be like fuck, no, I hate you, no, I
never want to learn how to make tea, and oh,
I guess, and it's just like, well, all these are
bitchy and mean, so I'll pick the least bitchy of
the three. I don't know why they gave me dialogue
options if they're all mean, but I guess like, ultimately,
they don't want you to have too much direction with
the fact that your character is a mean, frustrated, overworked,
pissy girl. They slowly want, I think, to turn you
into a to a relaxing tea lover.
Speaker 2: Perhaps I see. Okay, so there's a reason that they're
doing that.
Speaker 3: I suppose they have at that point.
Speaker 2: Like, why give the option?
Speaker 3: I give me three options if they're all mean. Mechanically,
I really like the design of this space. I think
it's beautiful. The tea shop is stunning. I love all
the different ways that you get to make tea. It
kind of has this whimsical It reminds me of like
it reminds me like a Hairy Potter candy shop where
they're just like, you know, these giant ladders that swing
throughout the place, so that because the tea pot is
so big, and you have to like kick open a
valve and like put the water in and make sure
that it's boiled to the perfect temperature. And then you
kick open another valve and it goes into the infusing
center and then you slide your ladder over and you
put in your tea leaves and your flavors and it marinates,
and then you kick open another valve and it goes
into the perfect tea cylinder where you like put your
tea cup and you have to pour it just right
so that the perfect amount of tea pours into the
cup and it doesn't overflow, but it's not too low.
And that feels good when you get it right. And
then you deliver the tea to the person they've given you,
you know, and they're like, oh, this is pretty good,
Like you should have some too. The game is filled
with lots of little spaces where I can pour myself
the same cup from that pot, and then I can
go to a nice bench and I can sit on
the bench and drink my tea and I will think.
My character will have realizations or thoughts about what's going
on with my life, or like why I'm so stressed
or frustrated, and I basically grow as a character every
time I just sit and have a cup of tea.
So I think I understand. I think what it's trying
to get me to do, which is like relax and
like not worry so much about the day to day
stresses and actually just enjoy making a cup of tea.
But my dude, like, as someone who really likes playing
games where I serve customers, you guys know that I
really love those sims where yeah and customers are like
I want this, but I don't want any blueberries. And
I also took a big shit in the bathroom and
you need to clear that up. And I'm like, oh
my god, yes, yes, sir. And so I'm like balancing
on these plays. This game is like the opposite of that.
I was shocked that, like, within the first hour of gameplay,
I had one customer. This is intentional, right, this is
no an accident. They want me to be relaxed and
kind of like enjoy the experience of a customer. But
the second a customer showed up, I was like, Hey,
what kind of tea can I make you? And the
guy was like, I don't know, Like life is so
crazy and like I don't even know what I want.
I was like, bitch, what do you want? Like I'm
so fucking ready to make his tea. I'm on another level.
It's like it's like I took adderall and this game
really wants me to take a sedative and I am
on the opposite playing field of like what this game
wants me to be, but what I want to do
with it.
Speaker 2: That's a great way of putting it. I feel like
I know exactly what you're talking about with that, Like yeah,
you like if you play like cook Served Delicious, Yes,
where it's like those games were just like, yeah, let's
go like that is a certain thing that you expect
from like you know, cooking and serving and stuff like that.
And it sounds like this is definitely going for a
different vibe. And I think he was probably in a
tricky spot and Davey reddening with with like his previous
stuff being so meta and having weird surreal twists and
stuff like that with a Beginner's Guide and Stanley parable
that it's almost that like m Night Shyamalan thing where
it's like, you know, he kind of rose.
Speaker 3: Not have a twist you a little bitch.
Speaker 2: Thing that made him is just like a certain way,
and then people have this certain expectation like, oh, this
worst the twist. Oh I'm sure it's gonna be a
little team making game. But then it's like you make
an actual team making game.
Speaker 1: Yeah, has Sean made a movie where just nothing changes
to fuck with people? And that's like everything happens exactly
as it plays. I haven't watched his last like six, I've.
Speaker 2: Only seen a couple of a twist.
Speaker 3: I feel like all of them have such sense.
Speaker 1: I mean, I haven't watched a while. That movie is
really fucking good.
Speaker 2: Last it was incredib I haven't seen it since the
n but like it was awesome. Yeah, it's just a
great movie.
Speaker 1: And also is one of the most underrated actors, especially
in horror, with Arister pulling her back out for Hereditary.
I like Signs.
Speaker 2: I like saying I thought Signs that was one of
my favorite movie theater experiences until like I did not
like the end. I know that's the common thing, but
like had a twist.
Speaker 3: Yeah that's a twist though, is it.
Speaker 1: No, It's like I think, Okay, good point, good point.
I think I think that movie was very much him
trying not to do a twist where it's like all
all the signs where there the whole time leading up
to this, like they're allergic to water. They're like it's
toxic to them. He always swung and thought wrong not
to swing. Yeah, he had asthma, so there his lungs
were closed up. It's like Shraumalaan saying there wasn't a twist.
I was everything happens. That's why he was a priest.
Fucking mel Gibson. I am an apologist for the Village.
That movie. I hated the Village. The Village is the
one where I left the theater and I think.
Speaker 2: I'm done with this guy.
Speaker 1: Yeah, a lot of people I get it, but like
I like that movie.
Speaker 2: Oh, I hated that.
Speaker 1: I don't blame I didn't care for the Village.
Speaker 3: I do think it had good world building, but I
just think sometimes it it kind of sucks the fun
out of the room when you're.
Speaker 1: Like what, I didn't like the twist. I just like
the I like the entire movie until he revealed what
was really happening.
Speaker 2: I think that's where I was. I think that made
me mad and then like I didn't see the trees.
Trees were trying to kill Mark Wahlberg.
Speaker 1: That's happening. Yeah, dude, good movie. Oh lady.
Speaker 2: That am I a.
Speaker 1: Huge Shyamalan fan, and I'm just really weirdo. Have you
seen Lady in the Water?
Speaker 2: No, I done.
Speaker 1: Us of a movie.
Speaker 3: I love it.
Speaker 1: It's so stupid. It's that's It has.
Speaker 3: A character who only works out one side of her body,
and so one of the one of theirs is super
buff and the other one.
Speaker 1: He's the pool guys. Oh, it's like a motel hotel
where there's like, what's her name from the village, Bryce Howard. Yeah,
she's in the Lady in the Water Again. I think
Shyamalan probably shows up at some point. The dude from
Moonrise Kingdom, balding guy, the the two camera stuff and
Moon Rise Kingdom, he's in Lady in the Water. But
Lady in the Waters whole thing is Shyamalan like deconstructing
fiction and it sucks.
Speaker 2: That was awesome.
Speaker 1: He's like, Oh, this is your role in the story,
and then everybody misunderstands their role in the story, and
then once they figure it out, it all works. There's
like a secret grotto in the deep end of the pool.
Oh my god, it's fucking awesome. The happening was also
sick and what was the what was the twist in
the happening?
Speaker 2: Like it was to kill you?
Speaker 1: No, that wasn't the twist. That was the premise.
Speaker 2: Oh I just heard, like I said, I was done
after the village and everyone that came after. I was like,
what's the twist?
Speaker 1: And reel as well. I think the I think the
twist was that it just stopped once it had killed
enough humans. It was, you know, the last of us,
the cordyceps. Yeah, the fungus is like apparently it pops
up in ant colonies or something when it's like senses
that they're getting too they're imbalancing the ecosystem. I think
the happening was like that plants were like, they're they're
destroying us. Let's kill the humans and they kill enough
and it stops. Because I think Mark Wahlberg and Zoe
Chanel during this like cabin it's you guys that.
Speaker 3: My friends saw that in theaters and halfway through the film,
he predicted that the twist was that it was going
to zoom out and that it was going to be
m Night Shamalan making the movie because it was so
bad that the twist was going to be this movie's
falling apart because the acting is so poor and that
and the the director is freaking out. But then that
never happened, and the movie just.
Speaker 2: Ended expecting that to be. The twist has to be intentional.
Speaker 1: No, they just didn't get it. Did you see a
big Mark Wahlberg? Guy? No, I hate you.
Speaker 2: Seem like you might be a big Mark Wahberg.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I respect him love Yeah, I actually don't. Yeah,
he's got rained and have you seen the Fighter? I
don't know. I think he's a good dude. He talks
taking baths, he loves Jesus. What's not to like?
Speaker 2: All the stars, all the stars of that?
Speaker 1: Have you? Oh? Actually? Oh ship? I went to one
episode filming of Jimmy Fallon and Mark Wahlberg was the
main guest. Oh nice, And he made Jimmy Fallon take
an ice bath in his suit.
Speaker 2: Oh my god. There's videos of him and like those
two talking to each other sounds like the thing conversation.
Speaker 1: It's like two robots trying to explain.
Speaker 3: To AI who are.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's it's a touring test where neither of them
knows their computers either.
Speaker 3: You like ice baths, that's true. I do like ice baths.
Speaker 1: Have you heard of this? Jesus, dude, I have an
n FT I have an n f T. It looks
like my brother Donnie, and Jesus. Donnie was in Brandon Brothers,
so he's better than I am. The Have you seen Devil,
that's the one in the elevator elevator? Yeah, Allen's I
love it. I love it. It's just the old woman
the whole time. I'm sorry I'm spoiling it, but I'm
pretty sure.
Speaker 3: That is a huge spoil Yeah, it's.
Speaker 1: Been forty years. No one's gonna watch it anywhere.
Speaker 3: It's also it's also bad.
Speaker 1: It's a bad movie. I'm saving it. I remember I
spent a Apple gift card on that movie on iTunes.
Oh my god, so like I have buyer's remorse, so
I'm like, oh, it was a sick movie. I spent
that eight dollars. Really well, anyway, it's like a.
Speaker 3: Game where you're trying to you actually have the ability
to plant seeds, and if you plant seeds in a
particular order. These are the things that I like about
the game. I think there are things that I just
did not understand right. I don't think I agree with
it narratively or like what it's trying to make me be,
but I like the mechanics of it. Making tea is
super fun, and designing plants and growing plants is very fun.
They have a book that gives you a guide, but
it has you don't know which colors will lead to
which types of plants. That's super fun. So you have
to put certain colors in a certain design pattern on
the ground, and they use like an octagonal grid to
give you a guide of where you want to plant things.
Once you do it, and you make a new type
of plant and you water it, you get a particular seed,
and then your book automatically updates to let you know
that if you use three blue flowers and one pink
flower in the middle, it will make this very specific
type of tree that will make a doesn't really matter,
but like a you know, a tte type. I shouldn't
have used word T, I should have used any other letter,
like a QQ plant that makes a sweet tea that
helps energize somebody. And so you keep all this stuff
in your booklets that you can recognize it later that way,
when a patron comes in and they're like, I'm really
tired and I love mint, You're like sick. I know
exactly which type of plant gives me high energy, and
I also have a plant that tastes like mint. So
I will combine those plants in my next tee for
this and I will brew it up and then I
serve it to the guy and he's like, this is
exactly what I needed. I'm stoked, Like let's have fun here.
That feels good. It feels good to serve people. It
feels good to like solve that that decision making of
like how do I design the per t for someone
and give it to them aesthetically, it is so relaxing
and fun to make tea. I think they nailed the
feeling of making tea. So I think it's cool and
I think it I think it is doing what it's
intending to do, which is cozy. I just think I
want to express that this is really more of like
a story about an overworked, you know, traumatic trauma induced
like main character who like feels like they're inadequate and
has like problems with like relieving that tension and stress
clumsily disguised as a cozy game that is okay, there
is like a whole world that this game is trying
to put in there that I don't want, but.
Speaker 2: You can do, you can do appreciate like cozy games
that are just cozy games, Like on the surface they're
a cozy game. When you dig in their cozy game.
Speaker 1: Like, that's what I trying to like speak to something
deeper that's no longer cozy. It's about tariffs, Like like
like the movie Sign, I thought it was just about
I thought it was just about a family living on
a farm, and turns out it's about faith and predestination.
I just get, let me have these aliens invade this cornfield.
I and then yeah, it's my favorite movie of all time.
But I still would prefer it was just a simple
farm alion.
Speaker 3: I think if this game was mostly about building tea
and at the very end she was like, man, I
had a lot of trauma, but this solved it, I
actually would have liked it. Much like Shyamalan. I think
my struggle is that the very beginning of this game
is all about trauma and like tension and dealing with inadequacy.
And I was like when do I get to make
the tea? So I think you need to be patient
with this game. I think it's for a very particular audience.
I absolutely can see people, especially people who are like
I want to be able to relax and take photos
and put them on the wall and build my tea
shop and enjoy the experience of running around like hunting
for tea leaves in the garden and stuff like that.
You will still like this game, just be aware that
there is a huge narrative at play that you cannot
bypass as far as I'm aware.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's a game on the tip of my tongue
that like does that, or there's several games where like,
I really think you hit it out of the park
already with the mechanics and the simple like gameplay premise,
you're trying too much. You don't have the writing chops,
and even if you did, I don't want that here. Like,
I guess it's cool to like kind of Trojan Horse
a story like that into something that seems much simpler
than it is, But I always I usually just get annoyed.
Speaker 3: Yeah, this game is extremely charming. It's extremely charming if
you like look. Yeah, the visual style. Oh, can I
just say one more thing that I love about it, which.
Speaker 1: Is what's spilled?
Speaker 3: Talk about spill the tea cup system. When somebody drinks
a cup of tea. Now the cup is dirty and
so you need to wash it. They have a cute
little train that runs through a waterfall, and so you
put the dirty cup in the train and it goes
through waterfall and it comes out to game.
Speaker 2: I like that. I'm a huge sucker for trains inside,
like tiny trains in side places like restaurants and stuff.
Speaker 3: Esthetically, this place is it is whimsical. It feels like
you're in a kid's candy store again. I feel like
it like it's like sucked out of like Hogwarts or
like some magical children's fantasy. It's beautifully designed. It's so pretty.
I want to play in there all the time. I
just do not want to have trauma.
Speaker 2: That's fair. I think that's a reasonable request.
Speaker 3: Yeah, so I asked. I asked Mike to wander Stuff
first because I also played a game called Spilled. This
game is extremely simple. I just want to preface that
this is the other half of wander Stop, which is
Spilled is a game where you are a tiny tug
boat and you are cleaning up oil spills and garbage
and debris. And when you do that, you get money
which you can build a bigger boat that has it's faster,
you make get more efficient. It is literally like just
the juice. It is all dewey. There's like no fucking premise.
There's no there's nobody being like, we gotta clean up
all this oil. You know, the penguins are sick, Like
none of that shit happens.
Speaker 1: It's just where it is that you're referencing, none.
Speaker 3: Of But I just say I was imagining what this
game's narrative would have been.
Speaker 1: But then the oil spills and it becomes this existential
consideration on a metal level. Offs oh god, well it's
oh god. I'm just I'm just formulating my waypoint pitch
before I do it. I'm not making I love point.
I miss sorry.
Speaker 3: There's no there's no there are there are like little animals,
but they don't there's no narrative. It's just like you
see the oil and you go clean it up. This
game is short. I just want to preface like this
is this is an indie ass India, and this is
made by like one person as far as I'm aware,
and it's very simple. I beat it within an hour,
so like keep that context in mind.
Speaker 2: This is like I feel like when you said, like, oh,
it's called spilled and play as a little tugboat that
cleans up oil, it sounded like something Mike would make
up for the merry ass Game of the Year.
Speaker 1: Spell to an exclamation point.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think this game is really cute. It sets
out to do what it wants to do, it completes
that task really quickly. As you upgrade your boat, you
get to like shoot water out of your little tugboat,
which is so cute. And then there's like fires in
some of the environments, and so you're putting out fires.
You're like sometimes you'll come across an oil covered like
swan and you'll like clean them up and then they'll
be like, oh, they don't actually say anything to you,
but yeah, if this was the other game, we'd be.
Speaker 2: Like, thank you.
Speaker 3: I was so devastrated. This is just an animal. You
clean it up and then it flies away and that's nice.
Speaker 1: What is going on in the world building that there
is a giant black cat on the shore.
Speaker 3: They don't explain anything. There's No, there's no narrative of
this game. You're just playing cool. That's it.
Speaker 1: The size of a windmill. Yeah, okay, I know this
game is.
Speaker 3: Very dewey and it it's that's it. You're just in
the world and you're cleaning up oil. Period done. That's
my pitch. I enjoyed it. It was one hour. It
was I felt I felt relieved when I finished playing it.
I was like, I cleaned the ship out of that
world game.
Speaker 1: This makes me want to go back to uh to
two years ago the boat the fishing game.
Speaker 2: Oh, Dredge.
Speaker 1: Dredge was so fun. They have the Arctic or Antarctic DLC.
I haven't played it. I might just go restart.
Speaker 3: That game was really I haven't played the DLC either,
and I think that was my goady, Like was it
two years ago?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 3: I loved that game.
Speaker 1: God That Wild Those That and Outer Wild both have
DLCs that I want to play, and I have distanced
myself from both games enough that I want to go
back and replay.
Speaker 2: I'd love to try the DLC About a Wild again
because like, that was my game of the year, and
then the DLC I could not get it, and I
should go back and.
Speaker 3: I had the narrative I didn't know where to go,
and I was like, really, I was like, the space
is really big and it took it takes time to
have a whole twenty four hour cycle yep. So going
somewhere and then having it not be the right direction
is kind of defeating. I do think that's a part
of the game, which is like, oh, I wasted today,
I better try again. But I quit for the same
reason Dan, which is like, if you're gonna fucking drag
my ass all the way to Mars, there better be
some fucking skeleton that I uncover in the sand. That is, like,
you actually want to go to Venus, like I need
someone to guide.
Speaker 2: Yes, exactly. That's a game I'm not against, like you know,
button my head against something and dying and stuff. That
was a big part about her Wilds. But I did
feel like I was able to deduce things in like
the DLC. I was kind of like, I've done this
loop ten times. I don't know what the funck I'm
supposed to do here, and that was more frustrating than
the fun for me.
Speaker 1: Okay, well, I do want to go back to that
and dredge though that Dredges really So.
Speaker 3: Those games are very very valuable to me. I like,
I speak so highly of them, but I can fall
off just like anyone else if I feel like my
time is being wasted. That's just the reality I think
of us having so many games to play Like. That's
the other aspect of it, which is like you can
really like a game, but being like, hey, I got
eight other games I want to play, so you need
to give me a real good reason to get back
in here.
Speaker 1: What's Disney's Extreme Skate Adventure? Dan? What the fuck?
Speaker 3: Dan?
Speaker 2: Look?
Speaker 1: I know, is this a Mike MANAUGHTI thing?
Speaker 2: No, this is the Tony Hawks pro Skater thing. This
is uh and as a result, I think it's probably
the best thing Disney's ever made. It's just I heard
that there was a game made in two thousand and
three or so for the PS two and it's using
the Tony Hawk four engine.
Speaker 1: Is that why I see a PS two on the
floor behind you?
Speaker 2: Oh, there's numerous reasons. There's PS twos and stuff behind me,
there's a VCR, there's I'm just I got a lot
of old guy stuff going on there. Yeah, like those
serious says watching the VHS tapes on stream last night,
meth Lab behind him, you can't see them looking at
a game cube, and then sixty four like they're all
out here with the wires everywhere. Are you watching on stream?
I bought a VHS tape of the best of tool
Time from Home Improvement.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Taylor, Taylor.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Yeah, there's a site that does this is a
new thing. Is the new VHS that was made happens.
It's called Real Cool. He's got a current sitcom and stuff.
Speaker 1: But really he's out of jail prison.
Speaker 2: He wasn't like he got arrested for like drug stuff
like before way before him approving.
Speaker 3: He's in societal prison in the sense that I think
people have shunned him because he's a bit of a quack,
you know.
Speaker 1: Like all I know about is based on the interview
he did on The Norm Show about cocaine and prison
and jail.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, that was before his like you know, SUPERO.
Speaker 1: Before Santa Claus. Then that's when he.
Speaker 2: Got way bags like Santa Claus.
Speaker 1: I've seen all three of those. I could tell you
every I could recite from memory, every Santa Claus movie, wonderful.
Speaker 3: I don't care for that actor to mellon, No.
Speaker 2: He's I like, look for some reason, the nineties were
a very different time, and everyone on Earth fucking loved
Home Improvement. It was the most popular funding. And then
remember when DVD season started coming out when I was
in college of like just TV shows, I was like, oh,
Home Improvement everyone. I got to get Home Improvement first
season DVD and I start watching. I was like, this
isn't really that funny.
Speaker 3: This is like it probably doesn't love but no reasons,
Like every time he would go to the guy his
neighbor who like hit half his face, well yeah, yeah, yeah,
I mean I grew.
Speaker 2: Up with that ship and now borland with his flannel
on Tool Time and they would always be like, oh,
we made a bathroom for dudes, and it's like, here's
where the beer comes out for your toilet.
Speaker 1: I remember that.
Speaker 3: They did a man's bathroom. They did a man's they
did it several times.
Speaker 2: Ye. That's on my VHS tape of the Best of
Tool Time.
Speaker 1: That's yeah, we were, we were. I would watch that.
We were really forward thinking family.
Speaker 2: That's what I was doing.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So okay, so it's just it's the toys for Bob
did a Tony Hawk game with Disney bullshit. But it's
like using to Tony Hawks.
Speaker 1: Never thought here.
Speaker 2: I mean, that's the thing. I don't give a shit
about Disney stuff. So like all the levels are like
Toy Story and Jungle Book and Tarzan and all this stuff.
But it just plays like a fucking Tony Hawk game.
Like when it starts off, the controls are different, but
then I looked at the options, it's like, turn on
pro controls and it just turns it into Tony Hawk.
It's like the same sound effects, the same like it's
Tony Hawk's four kind of goals, structure and everything. I'm
playing this games like this is just a fucking Tony
Hawk game. But I'm buzz Lightyear or whatever. Uh, it's
pretty fucking good. Like, as a big Tony Hawk guy
who's been thinking about Tony Hawk a lot lately, it's
weird to be able to pull up a game from
twenty two years ago that I had never heard of
and be like, this is basically a secret Tony Hawk game.
Speaker 1: Cool. Yeah, but it's got Disney stuff.
Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, I can. I can look past the Disney
stuff and just enjoy skating around. Oh but it's weird
because it's like the most brand centric shit ever. So
there's like a McDonald's and you go to the McDonald's
and you go to the drive through microphone and like, hey,
deliver these orders. So you're delivering like PS two rendered
like three D, like you know, uh, fries and quarter
pounders and stuff. And then you go to mister Nokia
and mister Nokia's like I got to get these new
ring tones. And you go around to everyone and you're
collecting their Nokia ring tones for their actual Nokia phones.
And it's I deeply respect the marketing to children aspect
of it, Like just trying to monetize kids. I have
to respect that. But yeah, it's a good skateboarding game.
Speaker 1: As you're phrasing. Sometimes throws me off. Just trying to
monetize kids.
Speaker 2: I mean they're idiots, so like get their money. Yeah
for sure. Yeah, you know what I'm saying, Mary, What's
Guns of Fury?
Speaker 3: Guns of Fury is a game that I want to
sell to Dan? I think you're gonna really like this.
Speaker 1: You don't recommend games to me, ever, it's always Dan.
Speaker 3: What is the don't play like rat based tile games?
Speaker 2: Very often is the Benn Diagram of interest games wise,
I think Mary, you and I probably overlap a lot
more than me, and me and Mike have a good overlapped.
Speaker 1: I think.
Speaker 2: I think what we're saying here is that I'm the
most well rounded. I play everything, and you two are
a little more in your little niche the.
Speaker 1: Most opposite, open minded, and he's the least in a
niche hole.
Speaker 2: Yeah I agree. Yeah, thanks for saying that.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I don't think that that's how I would describe
him at all.
Speaker 1: When it comes to me.
Speaker 3: I think often Mike and I band together to take
you down all the time from your dumb opinions about
some game that needs to be best, and it's actually
just okay.
Speaker 2: I think, I'm When did I do that last year?
Speaker 1: You do it every year you did?
Speaker 2: Would give me give me examples?
Speaker 1: You both did it with Pickman two years ago? What
was last year? Yeah?
Speaker 2: When was I? When was I stubborn?
Speaker 1: When we were last stubborn? Dan says, what did win
Game of the Year last year?
Speaker 2: Uh?
Speaker 3: Let me do our ghost last year category?
Speaker 1: I keep god, last year was kind of a funk?
Speaker 3: Was it Astrobot?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 2: Yeah, of course?
Speaker 1: Keeps over.
Speaker 2: Then he forgets about it, forgot, I forget everything. But yes,
that's one of the best games ever.
Speaker 1: No metaphor was better.
Speaker 2: This looks like Metal Slug, which I like.
Speaker 3: Yes, so it's a kind of a I would say
we have like a contra metal Slug vibe here asthetically
so much fun. Everything you shoot explodes.
Speaker 2: There's so many explosions in this.
Speaker 3: It's crazy. You shoot everything and it all explodes. But
they've done really nice details where like if you shoot
a barrel or like an oxygen tank, it will shoot
up into the sky. It will explode the tower, and
then the guy in the tower will be like, oh,
it's really fun. Okay, here we go. Here's my next part.
It's a metroid Vania.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm writing this down.
Speaker 1: Okay, I get why you recommend this. Yeah, it's tank
just shot a laser. I'm seeing the metroid Vania map now, yeah, yeah,
he's got a lightsaber in the mac. What the fuck?
Speaker 3: There's there's mechs.
Speaker 1: I'm watching the Steam gameplayers.
Speaker 3: They just games dewey as ship. It just plops you
in the world and so you'll go to all these
different like explosion areas.
Speaker 1: But they are like God there's an ice gun.
Speaker 3: I'm telling you, there's there's like twenty different guns, you guys.
Speaker 1: It's just shot a hole in a wall and open
up a secret room allah the original Zelda.
Speaker 3: And then there's there's three different types of weapons, right,
so there's like your main guns, there's your secondary gun,
which can be like a cannon, or it could be
like a laser gun. It could be all these different things.
And then there's your third one. So it could be
a knife, but it could also be a boomerang fuck,
or it could be a fire starter. And all of
those help expand your Metroidvania world. So again, you might
go to an area and you'll be like, well, I
can't climb this, and I don't have a double or
triple jump, so I guess I can't go here. But
you will get an item. And if you get this
very particular item, now all of a sudden, you can
hit the button that's really high because this is an
arc based throwing item, and now you can get to
a whole different area in the Metroidvania space. That's like
your new level. It has sick boss fights, it is challenging.
I have died a lot trying to like get the
boss fights to be completed. I've enjoyed the shit out
of this game. It's so funny. Is that, Like I
had a lot of really I have. I had like
seven games listed that I played in the last two weeks.
This is my favorite.
Speaker 2: Okay, I I already downloaded it. Yeah, it just that
looks like a fun video game, such.
Speaker 3: A fun video game, and it knows that it's a
fun video game, Like it knows what it's doing, it
it knows its player base. There's so few negatives. The
only negative I can say is that, like for a
game that's trying to compare itself to like Metal Slug
and you guys all know like Metal Slug has like
some of the most incredible animations, Yes, it's not of
that caliber. Sure, that's my only that's it. That's like
my only negative.
Speaker 2: Well, the idea that type of gameplay with a metroidvania,
like I you know, like Shadow Complex had guns and
was a metroidvania, but it wasn't in the vein of
like a contra Metal Slug type shooter. So like, I'm
definitely for trying this.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's super fun.
Speaker 1: I try it too, But you only recommend as it dance.
Speaker 3: I recommending it to both of you. I just think
a contra Detroidvania. I thought of Dan immediately, but I
think you will think you really like this game. This also,
like it was really off my radar, my my like
moderator when I stream got this and was like, hey,
I think you'd really like this game. And I would
not have played this if he did not buy that
for me, Like, I'm so grateful because the marketing or whatever,
for whatever reason, this totally blew over my radar, But
I'm really grateful that I played it, and so like,
this is why we have this podcast. Everybody needs to
play this game. It's it's fucking great. This is the
number one game and no one's fucking talking about it.
Guns of Fury.
Speaker 2: Okay, I will play it by the time we record next.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: This isn't just a challenge to you Dan or to Mike.
This is to all of our listeners. This is the game,
and I stand by it. If you don't like this game,
stop listening.
Speaker 2: Just don't take that seriously.
Speaker 1: We got no one's talking about it.
Speaker 3: How weird is that? And it's great. It's freaking great.
Speaker 1: What's dying the dungeon.
Speaker 3: This is a very quick one. I really like, uh
these types of games where you I don't know, it's
like deck building, but this one is with dice. So
you build a deck of dice and then you roll them,
and based on your rolls, you fight, you turn base
fight enemies in a dungeon, and it gets progressively harder.
This game is very difficult. I think if you like
turn based deck builders in dungeons and you want to
try something different, this is the same thing with dice.
You play as a cute little frog. I think it's cute,
a little difficult. I mean I'm not even getting past
the first area, so maybe they need to uh maybe
I suck or maybe the Katie to look at it
a little bit. It's early access, so I suspect that
this game needs to be fine tuned. I bought it
in the sale, you know, like in the Steam sale.
That's why I bought it, because it was on sale.
So I think it's a great Steam sale game because
I you know, it's like it's already not very expensive,
and when you add a you know, a ten percent
or twenty thirty percent off, it's like ten bucks. It
was great, So anyway, it's called die in the dungeon
d I E. And I think that's just a little
play on words because you roll dice and dicey dungeons
was already taken.
Speaker 1: I was like, that's not a pun, that's just how
you spell it.
Speaker 2: But it's the word.
Speaker 1: Yeah, if it was color based, d y e ullo.
Speaker 2: Look at this guy. Wow.
Speaker 1: It was a weirder tasting than I thought it would be.
Speaker 2: Audio listener to the audio listeners my deep throat of
the microphone.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but it tasted different like I thought it'd be sweeter.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a giant windscreen on it. That's gross.
Speaker 3: That's how they get you.
Speaker 2: This is a hymn thing.
Speaker 1: Oh dude, I I have such an overwhelming urbage to
put cylindrical things in my mouth all the time.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, games, you want to, you want to? You want to?
Want to talk about emails? Sure, hey, everybody as usual.
You can right into Jake. I don't know figure out
where the fuck to come in on that conversation. You
can ride into fire skate pass at gmail dot com.
I should mention I'm gonna mention this later on. I
didn't talk about any games at all, which keen listeners
will have noticed because I was in GDC last week
and I just wasn't. I was wasn't playing games playing games.
Speaker 3: You're playing one very particular game with our buddy Vinnie.
Speaker 1: Yes, that's where I was going with that. I forgot
where I was going. Thank you you saved me. Yeah,
Vinnie and I are playing Total war Warhammer three two campaigns.
Based on how many people have signed up people like it,
seems like a lot of you know about it.
Speaker 2: However, I think Warhammer might be popular. I've never heard
about it anywhere.
Speaker 1: It's just it's Vinnie is popular. I think if you're
not a video tier patron for fire Escape, we Vinnie
and I are doing a co op campaign in Total
War Warhammer three. He is playing as Imrick with the
High Elves, and I am playing as Oxy Ottle with
the Lizard Men, and we're doing a good quote unquote
order campaign. And then if you're not signed up to
next Lander on their video or their top tier, I
believe uh that we're doing the Evil campaign over there.
I'm playing as Count Knocklist in the Vampire Zombie Pirates.
Vinnie is playing as skull Taker and the Demons of corn.
So that's fun. It's been fun. We're going back and forth.
So if you're listening to this episode and it goes
up on the day, there's a new episode over at
next Lander for the Evil Campaign, and we're coming up
on episode three for the Good Campaign next week.
Speaker 3: You're gonna want to be a Vineo tier level Patreon
subscriber because you're gonna want to get those videos.
Speaker 1: No, I noticed neither of you have said anything about
watching it.
Speaker 2: I just I just don't want to be spoil the
high stuff in particular. I'm just trying not to get
spoiled on it right now. It's you know, the Lord.
It's a big time for the Hiles. Going to finish
the Severn finale tonight.
Speaker 1: I caught up on White Lotus. We have not started severnce.
I think that's our next show, White Lotus. Uh oh.
In general, how are you liking the season compared to
the first is? What is? No White Lotus.
Speaker 3: Lotus is much more of a slow burn this season,
in my opinion, I think they all are right like
the all the hook is like somebody dies, but the
actual show is about watching these characters slowly transform and
things like Bubble up to the surface to the degree
that things start happening towards the final episode, maybe the
second to last episode. I just feel like the first episode,
a lot of shit happened, right Like there was like
a lady who like was pregnant and I ended up
giving birth ing them. There was a lot going on
in the in the first season, and in the second
season this is slower like a birth in.
Speaker 1: The first season. Yes, I just water bike, oh sure, sure, sure, yes, yes, yes,
very early on the staffer.
Speaker 3: But that like first episode is really stressful. I would say,
like in this one, the stress is not from like
a crazy thing that happens. The stress is from character
dynamics that are like really intense. If you're paying attention
to the dialogue and what's going on. There's like these
three iconic ladies. They're like a little like they're older,
and they're stunningly beautiful. But every time one of them leaves,
the other two talk about the person who's left. That
is a very stressful dynamic to me. So, yeah, maybe
there isn't crazy things happening all the time, but the
dynamics between these these characters are very stressful. It's different,
it's stressful in a different way. This season, I'm liking it.
Speaker 1: I don't.
Speaker 3: I don't dislike it.
Speaker 1: I like season one a bit more than two. However,
the character work in this season is really really good.
It's really good Walton Goggins. I love this renaissance he's
having with this and Fallout.
Speaker 3: Yeah, he's great and what a totally different character than
its Fallout character, but both so well done. He's a
tremendous actor. I also like whoever plays his girlfriend with
the teeth. She's amazing. I'm trying not to be disrespectful
because I find.
Speaker 1: Her stunningly beautiful.
Speaker 3: Yes, but if you were to describe her, I would
say she's super hot, and she's got big old teeth,
and she she's a great actor. She owns that role entirely.
I think she's phenomenal.
Speaker 1: Patrick Schwarzenegger is so fucking good at being a huge douchebag.
Speaker 2: Schwarzinger's good in this. Yeah, he's like, oh wow.
Speaker 1: His name is Saxon and he from this very white
like North Carolina Duke Chapel Hill family.
Speaker 3: He reminds me of Johnny every time he comes into
a scene. He's just like bebe Is and They're like,
what are you talking about? He's like anyway, like, check
out my fucking dick, and then he like walks away.
Very he was acting, but that that's a good actor, right,
Like he's created a real hateable, punchable guy.
Speaker 1: And I feel like all the time he spends talking
about his body and working out is just making fun
of his dad. But it's it's dad, right, not that.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and is he the maid son when he has
an affair with the maid?
Speaker 1: Oh, I don't know.
Speaker 3: Oh that's crazy. That's behind the scenes because because Arnold
Schwarzenegger famously had a kid out of wedlock with his maid,
I understand. I think this is full blood, but I
don't know.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'm going to do that based.
Speaker 3: On the fact that he really looks like Arnold, like.
Speaker 1: He's got Arnold vibes he does. So go watch uh,
Vinnie and Mike save the world on fire Escape, and
then go watch Vinian Mike destroy the world on Next Lander.
All right, we got some emails from uh Mary. Do
you want to read this? First one from Rich from Pennsylvania.
Speaker 3: Chat up, guys, I live in Philadelphia area and growing
up we always referred to Italian ice as water ice.
It wasn't until I was a full grown adult that
I realized that to anyone not from the area, water
ice just sounds like ice. Did you grow up with
any weird regional names for things that you didn't realize
were weird until years later. I know people in Minnesota
also allegedly refer to duck duck goose as duck duck,
gray duck. That's fucked up right, all the best rich
from Pennsylvania. I had no idea that you could say
gray duck. That's weird.
Speaker 2: It's not allegedly, that is definitely it's the only state
in the country where it's not duck doug goose, it's
duck duck, gray duck.
Speaker 1: Yeah, weird, Mary, you wrote one down. I don't know
if this is regional or just you're being weird when
you say this.
Speaker 3: Everyone from Ohio says recpcs No.
Speaker 2: That's a weird thing. I ate a good chunk of
a five pound bag of Reese's Pieces on Wednesday, and
I was saying Reese's pieces every time I ate some.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I just ate a good chunk of a five
pound bag. How many pounds was a good chunk? Well?
Speaker 2: For the Et.
Speaker 1: They have five pound bags of Reese's pieces.
Speaker 2: Yes, Jeff Creb sent me five pounds of Reese's pieces
that I had to shove through the mouth hoole of
an et mask for work on Wednesday.
Speaker 3: You did not have to do any of this.
Speaker 1: I'm an artist, yours is a noble profession. Yes, I've
heard people Saye's pieces, but it's I don't think it's
a region. It's ohioh Grub says it too, and Mike.
Speaker 2: Wait, no, because maybe it's not Reagional, because I remember.
Speaker 1: I think it's just Mary and like I've heard years ago,
but they're not from Ohio.
Speaker 2: Louis c K says it that way, and we're seeing
him years ago when he said res PCs. Yeah, is
he from Ohio? No, he's in New Yor. Well, he
grew up in Mexico.
Speaker 1: I think Luis c K grew up in Mexico.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's like half Mexican.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's a classic Mexican accent.
Speaker 2: Yeah, maybe it's just a Mary and Louis c K thing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, sometimes want to be a PECS. And I just
think I'm going to die one day. I don't know.
I can't do Louise. Okay, I shouldn't. I probably shouldn't.
Speaker 3: Probably not. So I try to think of like weird
dialects regional stuff.
Speaker 1: I mean a lot of the regional stuff from like Syracuse, well,
Syracuse itself. The pronunciation I think we've talked about We've
definitely talked about this on fire Escape before, like way earlier.
There's some listeners from Syracuse, and I think they got
in an argument with me, or rather emailed in saying
it looks like Syracuse and it's named after the Sicilian
city Syracusa. But everybody I grew up with who's from
there did not pronounce it like that. They pronounce it
Syracuse like Sarahcuse instead of Syracuse.
Speaker 2: I would trust the people who live there, right.
Speaker 1: But there's other people who do who also live there
and emailed me saying I'm from here and I pronounce
it Syracuse. But I remember our like our chancellor at
SU when I was going to before I graduated, email
all that all the students with like a it was
supposed to be a fun community building is like are
you a deer or a bear? Do you say Syracuse
or Syracuse? Uh? And like most people who are from there,
of which there were not that many because people come
from everywhere to go to ask. You were saying, no,
we say Syracuse. The Syracuse was just too it's easier
to say Syracuse and like there's a specific kind of
drawl from Syracuse that like, I don't say trailer, that's
too hard on my vocal cords. Yeah, I said trout.
But again there's other people who are like, I'm from
here and I don't say it like that. You're a moron.
Speaker 2: You said Syracuse so much now that my brain is
refusing to acknowledge it as a word, and I can't
remember how I used to say, Oh, there's a cool word.
Speaker 1: There's a cool phrase for that. Uh, semantic satiation happens,
somatic satiation or something like that. It's a cool phrase.
Speaker 3: It's like when you say, like the word potato so
much and you're like, that's crazy that that's even a
word potato.
Speaker 1: Clitorris clit taoris, clittoris, clittoris cloris.
Speaker 2: Joe Montanas like Joe Montana, that's not a guy. That's
not even a series of words that Joe Montana doesn't
mean anything. That Cartoon Network character. He's not a all
time Court Montana. That's like, I must be misremembering this.
Speaker 1: Yeah, g spot, G spot, G spots, I mean the clitus.
Neither of them exists, so it works. What the fuck?
Where we talk? Oh, regional stuff, most of the regional stuff?
Uh Syracuse? Has I mentioned Syracuse because I was gonna say,
we have regional cuisine. Uh chicken chicken speedies from the
stay Air, which'm actually gonna make the night speedy. Oh yeah,
cuisine not in the sense, and it's fancy cuisine, just
like regional food.
Speaker 3: I mean chicken speedies.
Speaker 1: Yeah, some nice Papa musavice and some chicken speedies.
Speaker 2: Do you say little smokies?
Speaker 1: Never heard of that before.
Speaker 2: Oh maybe that's little sausages. Yeah, like little hot dogs.
Speaker 3: You gotta have little smokies and you and whoever when
you make maybe one of the moms comes with a
fucking crock pot and she's like, I have the little
smoke key and they're always smoking cross pot with like barbecues.
Speaker 1: Why from the white latuce right there, I got a
little smokies. Where's my little rezipam pipernet I brought? I'm
I missing my pails. I salt potatoes. Salt potatoes are
a thing in Syracuse as well. You literally boil potatoes
in salt water and then you serve them with melted
butter and some like green onions.
Speaker 2: Sounds pretty good.
Speaker 1: Oh, it's good, it's great. It's just like Amanda when
she first met me and I was telling her, I
was like, yeah, we had like salt potatoes at the barbecue,
Like what the fuck are those? And it's just you
boil them in salt water. There's probably some nuances that
I'm not familiar with, but phrasing.
Speaker 2: Wise, we had the stuff where it's like everyone else
got soda pop hop, like you know, definitely grew up
like every soda was a coke at one point. I
don't think I heard pop much.
Speaker 1: I didn't either. We were soda.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I think we used pop in Ohio, which is yeah.
But I think interchangeably you could use soda. But if
I asked for for me, if I were to ask
for something right now, I'd be like, oh, I don't
want to pop, Like I would probably still say pop.
Speaker 2: I think i'd say soda. Yeah.
Speaker 1: Water ice from Rich from the email is very weird.
I have a one of my good friends is from Philly.
The way that people from Philly and Long Island say
water is weird, the Philly water that's odd. I like it,
It's got a nice ring to it, but I don't
say it like that, Oh are you? Are you? If? Okay,
if you're waiting in a queue to get into a store,
how would you phrase that?
Speaker 2: I've heard this. You're in line, You're in line?
Speaker 1: Yeah, Mary, how would you phrase it?
Speaker 3: My instinct is to also say I'm in line?
Speaker 1: Yeah, me too. I think it's like a New York
thing to say online.
Speaker 2: Bank and her family all say, and then there's a
lot of water going on there too, Yeah, yeah, although
you know what it's not. It's water w like O
O T E. It's like a lot to Long Island.
Speaker 1: Yeah, water almost, but like yeah, it's I think it's
Jersey New York is online, I know, back of our
you know, like the Long Islanders and Jersey. Jersey folks
say Mario a lot.
Speaker 2: That's that's just actually wrong.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I like, because yeah, I think in Italian
wouldn't what would Mario be in Italent?
Speaker 2: Like?
Speaker 1: How would the I.
Speaker 2: Think the argument is that like, oh yeah, on the
East coast wherever, there's a lot of guys named Mario
pronounced Mario, but not that Mario. He says his own
fucking name all the time to one of the like
five words he says to me Mario. Guess he says Mario.
Speaker 1: I think the argument there is like Japanese developers, wouldn't
they fucked it up when they were making Mario.
Speaker 2: I'm just listening to the man say his own name.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I guess he would know to me Mario, Yeah, inline.
I feel like there's another one that's always throws me
off' worsh.
Speaker 2: I would hear. My grandma is from the South and
she would say worsh instead of oh, like.
Speaker 1: Wash, yeah, yeah, I put in the wor. Yeah, there's
a I went to. I think you two know. I
think I've talked about it before. I went to University
of Arkansas for two years and my ex's grandparents lived
on Grand Lake in Oklahoma, which is a gorgeous little
pocket of the country. If you've never been to Lake
Country in Oklahoma, go if you're around, go check it out.
Uh there's a place in Oklahoma that is spelled m
I A m I Miami.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: It's not how they fucking say it. It is Miama, Miama.
Speaker 2: Oklahoma and Missouri.
Speaker 1: You know, Missouri and Miama. Yeah, it's a very Parker,
posey in white lotus way of saying Miami, and that
always threw me off. But I kind of like Miamah.
Speaker 2: Kind of like that. I don't like Missouri.
Speaker 1: I don't like Missouri. I don't like the state or
how it Yeah, just about listeners, but.
Speaker 2: To them get out of state, Yeah, it's not good.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I spent a lot, not nearly as much time
as Dan, I've spent a lot of time there, and
I was always I'd rather read Oklahoma. Yeah, but yeah,
it was always the stair. I'm actually curious if anybody
from Syracuse says Syracuse because it's just too I actually
get kind of tired saying Syracuse. It like wears me
out a bit. It's too just a strain on my
vocal cords trailer Syracuse Alien Alien.
Speaker 3: I feel like you, Ohio. Well, least where I was
growing up, it wasn't so much that we that we
said very specific words differently, but Valley girl accent is
like very normalized there, and so just saying things with
a strange inflection upwards that everything is like a question
is very normal, but I don't know if like there's
a very particular use case for an individual world word,
whereas it's just like, you know, do you know where
I can get a smoothie around here? Is like very
normal to talk like that.
Speaker 2: I don't like that. It's just not good. Yeah. Here,
you get a lot of like the Minnesota people that
are just like any double o. It's like broom roof,
you know, like a lot of just like, yeah, I
had me a broom like Tim Turry is like the
most Minnesota man ever.
Speaker 1: Tim. Tim's pronunciation of Boston is funny to me. Boston.
He says like, oh, yeah, we're going to Boston for
Pax East, Like.
Speaker 2: He's saying it with like a Boston accent.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, no, it's just like the O is a
very hard O instead of an a W.
Speaker 3: Boston says mom, like ma'am, And sometimes that confuses me.
Speaker 1: My sister is the only one in our family who
just has a like a where's Fargo, Dakota, Minnesota, North Dakota.
My sister just has an Upper Midwest accent. I don't
know where she got it. Her husband's not from the
Upper Midwest. We are not she like, I don't know
where she got it.
Speaker 2: Would you truly for me to have any kind of accent? Uh?
Speaker 1: Nothing stands out. I don't see.
Speaker 2: I do feel like that Midwestern, like like this is
up for Midwestern. There is a Minnesota accent, but I'm
not from here, so like, I just feel like Kansas
is in the Midwest. Midwest doesn't have much of one.
Speaker 1: You do say some stuff, how would you? Uh? You
kind of have the George Bush pronunciation of nuclear, don't you.
Speaker 2: No, Because there's an an accurate way of saying it
where you say nuclear, but it's well no, wait, it's
not no, that is the correct one. Nucular is the
wrong one. Nuclear is the right one. Yes, nucular is
the wrong way to do it. W fan over, I'm
not thinking about clear Are you pro?
Speaker 1: Are you pro? Operation Iraqi? Freedom to Dan?
Speaker 2: That was quite a jug, Mike.
Speaker 1: Dan is a big book.
Speaker 2: The mission got accomplished, did it not?
Speaker 3: The classic W.
Speaker 1: Closeted Cheney fan this whole time? One hundred three episodes
in And finally about these tariffs, Dan, what do you
think about Halliburton and their oil interests? Dan?
Speaker 2: Uh, They're bad?
Speaker 1: I thought I had him.
Speaker 3: He gets away for another episode.
Speaker 1: Dan is always on his toes when it comes to politics.
I I'll get him. God masterful Perry Dan. Thank you
Richard Pennsylvania. Dan, do you want to read this one?
It's from Actually hold on while you read it?
Speaker 2: All I say it notes on there. Hello, what's the
worst name for the best thing? Anything? Food, movie, game, book, hobby, sex, position,
you name it. I'm a big fan of the Australian
band King Gizzard and the Lizard Wizard. I don't hate
the name, but I know a lot of people who do,
and it legitimately makes them hard to recommend to people
who I know would love their fantastic discography. That's left
from the West Coast, Australia. Simon PS, please don't tear
if my email.
Speaker 1: I don't want Simon from Australia. It's not the same
one though.
Speaker 2: The same way, you know. Yeah, let's tear. I got
a couple for a bad so good thing. I mean,
I don't consider this the best thing, but it was
very big for a while. Pubg uh, you know, like
that was a fucking terrible player. Unknowns Battleground. Yeah, that's
a terrible name.
Speaker 3: That's a really great example.
Speaker 1: Dan, such a bad name, right with ship like that?
Speaker 2: A lot of ones are too many colon's and you know,
too many subtitles and stuff. There's a movie Mary learned
about during your wedding thing, Sorcerer, which it is not
at all indicative of what the movie is about. It's
about driving trucks that had dynamite in them precariously and Sorcerer, right,
we thought about that one before.
Speaker 3: You love that movie.
Speaker 2: Incredible movie. Bad name.
Speaker 3: Yeah, Sorcer doesn't even make sense.
Speaker 2: No, it doesn't at all, like not on its own,
a bad name, but for that movie, it's a bad
name because that's not indicative at all.
Speaker 1: I'm sorry that there's movies I don't. I don't know
if this person listens to the podcast, Dan, I'm not.
Can you see what's resting on top of my Rambo
Steel book? You have signed a mission.
Speaker 2: To me to give mission impossible?
Speaker 1: No, no, no, no, it's a DVD.
Speaker 2: Oh, I know what you're talking about. You're saying that's
a bad.
Speaker 1: Title, bad radio. No. I was just thinking I was
looking at my in my background. This is a complete
not like tangent. I just no, not at all. I
just noticed it was right there, and Dan and I
haven't talked about it yet in this episode.
Speaker 2: Oh no, I understand what.
Speaker 1: I don't think this person listens to the show. Okay,
I'll explain it someday and then this whole terrible They
will all laugh. Tangent will makes sense.
Speaker 3: More, Ali and the laser eyes.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah. Video games are there so many?
Speaker 3: Warhammer forty thousand, Dawn of War, Soul Strong.
Speaker 1: Total Total War, Warhammer three, everything in that Wherealm is bad.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'll do my rare wrestling thing with you. Guys,
say you have you heard of the Steiner brothers vaguely? Okay?
There was? There were classics in the eighties nineties, Rick
Steiner and Scott Steiner. They were just dudes from Michigan
that would come just beat the shit out of you.
They were awesome. They were known as the Steiner Brothers.
All the Rooms, the Steiner Recliner, the Franken Steiner, all
that everyone knows miss the Steiners. Rick Steiner has a
son who's now a big deal in w A U. E.
He looks like his dad, he talks like his uncle.
He's fucking awesome. You think you just call his real
name is Braun reck Steiner, which is a cool fucking
name they named. But they named him bron Breaker, which
it's like he's a fucking Steiner. Call him bron Steiner,
Like bron Breaker is stupid as fuck, right, Yes, yeah,
call him a Steiner anyway. Every just about wrestling, Mike.
Speaker 1: I agree. The country Turkey, Mmm, I've never been I
heard that not anymore.
Speaker 2: Didn't they change it or something I thought I'd referred
to as like get a different name Turky or something.
Speaker 1: Yeah? Why why are they not conforming to my understanding
of Turkey?
Speaker 2: Oh? I know, Mary's got to be thrilled now because
it's not the Gulf of Mexico anymore.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, Mary, you haven't been annoying the ship out
of us about Yeah.
Speaker 2: We get it. Yeah, you love it.
Speaker 1: You're like party hat golf of Americas over here. Yeah.
Also you've been like you've been. She sent us this
map of Canada with like red lines from America into.
Speaker 2: It in Greenland. She's big on Greenland. Ship.
Speaker 1: Now it's like the seventy sixth Tank Division and then
it's a line up Vancouver. It's weird, weird. You got
to stop.
Speaker 3: I don't, I don't need to hate expanding. You guys
want to shrink your territory. What's going on here?
Speaker 2: That's a good point.
Speaker 3: Yeah, nuke the whales got a nuke something. You guys
want to not not grow.
Speaker 2: That's what you always say. That's a fun I don't
even know what I think.
Speaker 1: It's a great name for the first time recently. It's good.
That's like a great name. I describe it. It's almost
like a mini chicken cutlet, but with other herbs in
the breading, and it's like a It's a big pub
food in Australia. So we did an Australian pairing night
recently and my friend from Australia, well, his wife made them.
I should put a caviar on top. So I don't
know if that was like.
Speaker 2: I was at an Australian pairing night and then this
person on top, Mike, you are you have descended so
far into self parody like.
Speaker 3: That such a common food, there's no reason to put
caviar on.
Speaker 1: You can put caviar. Oh, that was the first caviar.
Have you guys had caviar before?
Speaker 2: I had caviar on a cool restrito.
Speaker 1: Suddenly I'm not the only boogie one of the podcast
on a cool rest rito. Yes, you put it on chips.
I did once. Yes, I get it. It's yeah, you
were there, right, yep, yeah, yeah. He told me to
dress up for this party, and you showed up in
w W T shirt.
Speaker 2: The are you talking about?
Speaker 1: You said, let's go to existing conditions for New Year's Eve.
Don Lee, who's who's like a friend of Giant Bomb East,
is hosting it. It's one of his cocktails. And you
said it's gonna be pretty like there's gonna be people
dressed up. So I come in like a sport coat
and chinos and you're in a WWET shirt.
Speaker 2: I have pictures of us from that night. I'm wearing
a nice buttonup shirt. What the fuck are you talking about?
Speaker 1: I promise you you're not. And I remember there.
Speaker 2: Was a New Year's Eve before it was twenty nineteen,
going in twenty twenty because I was about to start
working in w DOE. I'm wearing a button up shirt.
I could clearly prove you wrong on this.
Speaker 1: If show me a photo of you had existing conditions
where you're not wearing a T shirt, Okay, I would
love to, all right, see it.
Speaker 3: When I got the opportunity to freelance for my very
first time at game Spot for E three. I said,
what's the dress code? And the person who got me
the job said, it's business casual. So I went to
a store and I bought a nice pair of dress
slacks and a simple pair of flat black dress shoes
and a white collared like not like a fancy shirt,
but like a like a nice white shirt that would
go well with these black slacks. And I walked in
on the first day of E three and all you
motherfuckers were wearing like chili sta nasty ass raggedy clothes,
and I looked like I had just come in from
some kind of business meeting. And I went to his
name is Jan he worked on the live team, and
I was like, what the fuck, dude, and he was like, yeah,
it's a business and you dress casual.
Speaker 2: Business casual.
Speaker 1: Dan to you, I discorded you the picture. Of course,
all the photos. It's just you stole my phone. You
and bonk.
Speaker 2: I'd send you the picture.
Speaker 3: No, I will, I will say from an outsider, I've
been looking at this picture. Michael is dressed up and
wearing a nice suit with a tie, and he's got
like four corners in his little pocket. And Dan, you're
just wearing a fucking black shirt.
Speaker 2: Especially, I only had like, like if I had buttons
on a shirt, that was me being fancy. I got,
I got more, but not a w W shirt.
Speaker 1: That's on me. I got. I look good though.
Speaker 3: I think there's like a Roman Reigns shadow in it.
Speaker 1: There's yeah, button for sure. That's a fun night. That
was a good cocktails.
Speaker 2: Yeah, great place.
Speaker 1: Okay, Yeah, I'm all tapped out on a weird phrasing
for stuff. Uh, I will read the last one from Morgan.
Speaker 2: Uh.
Speaker 1: Hello, arsonists. I like that people have been saying that
it's cool I want to burn stuff. Congrats on making
it to one hundred episodes. Thank you, Thank you, love
listening to you all every two weeks, and love the tournament.
My question is, it's four am and your phone rings,
and it's one of your fellow co hosts and they're
in jail. What do you think they did to get
locked up. I'll get the obvious ones out of the way,
like Dan is calling Mike because he assaulted at Taco
Bell employee because they actually put vegetables in his food.
Mary is calling Dan because she did nothing wrong, But
for some reason, there's a New Jersey housewife missing and
no one has seen her since she said something rude
to Mary. But Mary did nothing after that. Dot dot
dot dot dot dot. And of course Mike is calling
Mary to let her know that he's actually escape from
jail and he's right outside her window. I love the podcast.
Here's to one hundred more. It's Morgan from New Orleans.
Speaker 2: In reality, we would get because I don't think any
of us are like. We don't drink and dry. I
never did no like no.
Speaker 1: I I if I had to pick something for Mary,
I would actually think it might have had to do
with her temper.
Speaker 2: I think it'd be a fight. Yeah, I think for
real would be a fight.
Speaker 1: Yeah. And I know I don't have.
Speaker 3: Literally perfect I would never kill anyone. I just think
it would cause a scene. But I don't harry.
Speaker 1: Like I picked you up and moved you across the bar.
Speaker 3: She tried to open the bathroom. That's assault. She should
be in jail.
Speaker 1: She tried to open a door the fucking nerve.
Speaker 2: I actually think my answer for both of you is
a fight at a bar.
Speaker 1: Mm hmmm. I'd moved past that.
Speaker 3: There was a time if we can just be reasonable
where that was the number one thing that would have
happened to Mike, and we all.
Speaker 1: Kind of like hell our breath agreed, But I don't when.
Speaker 3: You are a spicy boy. But I think that that
time has passed. But there was a time where you
would looking at you sideways.
Speaker 2: I don't think any of us are going to jail,
but I do think most likely for Mike, if it
had to be something would still maybe be a fight.
He still got it in him somewhere.
Speaker 1: No, No, it's gone now, Chakra, it's gone now.
Speaker 3: I think it's possible that if there was like a
museum and they were like, we're having a really unique
museum and we have original candy bars that are one
of a kind, and these are iconic and they are special,
and they're not actually to be held. These are just
for people to view for historical accuracy. I could see
like Dan dropping down and not touching the laser ground
and like slowly making his way to the glass that
would be taken style. Yeah, like the splits and you
look so hot and you're like you're just like barely getting.
Speaker 1: That's not she doesn't do that in the movie.
Speaker 3: Like you're doing the smoke. You see the lasers and yeah,
you use your now to just borrow from Batman. You
like have the Catwoman claws and you make a perfect
circle out of the glass and you take out the
original Uh it doesn't the very first one.
Speaker 1: Ever made, and you replace it with a bag of sand.
That's of course, yeah, from every movie Perfect crime. Where
does where does he go wrong? That gets him arrested? Yeah?
Speaker 3: I mean I think that once he gets it and he.
Speaker 1: Likes leaves and forget, he walks the whole thing and.
Speaker 2: A brag on a podcast about it, and then he
went through all over him.
Speaker 3: He's got the evidence everywhere.
Speaker 1: He's at the security line in the airport and they
find this one of a kind unique candy bar in
his bags, like, oh fuck, I forgot I had stolen this.
Speaker 3: You will call it.
Speaker 2: I'm on the straight and narrow. They can't pin nothing
on me.
Speaker 3: I think that they'll also get Dan for looking at
pervy games. I think that one.
Speaker 2: Day she is and I will blame Mary in court
and I'll say, like she told me to do it
for us.
Speaker 3: I didn't know that Panny Sniffer RPG. Three thousand was bad.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I didn't tell me that, Dan.
Speaker 1: I could actually see Dan, you would get arrested because
you didn't know something was illegal.
Speaker 2: I could see that, and you did it right in.
Speaker 1: Front of several police officers.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I just don't know what that thing would be. But
I could see you fainting.
Speaker 3: Or not sitting two guns in the air.
Speaker 1: You would be like, I didn't know this was illegal?
Still illegal.
Speaker 2: Actually, you know what the likely thing is is like
when I went to be somewhere that you can't like
get in easily or whatever. I always was, I'll just
walk straight in. I've tried to sneak backstage when I
was a teenager at so many different de witty events
and stuff like that. So like that teg oh, you
tell me to do that a Madison Square guard something
like talking.
Speaker 1: About this is one of my favorite Dan stories. Have
we talked about We must have at some point, like
a while ago, Dan and I went to It was
the Dan correct me if I'm wrong before I worked there. Correct.
This was like twenty nineteen. Yeah, twenty nineteen.
Speaker 3: You're lucky didn't put you on the list.
Speaker 1: It was the first time I believe Stone Cold was
back at MSG in a while.
Speaker 2: It was like a special, and we went and.
Speaker 1: We watched it, and then we were backstage because a
friend of our, Broadway Alex knew several people that were
helping with the broadcast, and basically we got wrote, we
got We were walking out with Broadway Alex and a
few people to the street didn't realize we were leaving
the backstage, and Dan was of course peeking out because
he's a big fan of a lot of these people
that are hanging around, and again he hadn't worked there yet,
so there was you know.
Speaker 2: Like, oh my got Stone cold tried.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean even I was. It was like cool
for them to be in their vicinity. And then we
didn't really realize we were leaving. We were kind of
in a conversation that was naturally walking toward an elevator,
and then we were on the other Oh shit, we're leaving.
We were just backstage and now we're gone. So of
course Broadway Alex and uh and his friend at the
time leave and me and Dan are just waiting. We're like, well,
do we go home? And Dan's like, no, I want
to get back backstage. And of course it was an
MSG event, so like NYPD had been hired, like had
been I don't know, contracted. However, it works to be
secure run security around the exterior of MSG. When we
were backstage, shit, you know, we had met the dude
who was like in charge of getting us backstage and
his name was Chad. So here I am trying to
convince Dan we're not getting back in because we had
left drunk, and Dan is telling an NYPD officer who
had no idea of what the fuck was going. He's like, dude,
I was just my job is to guard this door
and not let anybody through this little shady no handle
door on like the west side of MSG. And Dan's like, oh, no, no, no,
we're looking for Chad. He I was like, Dan, he
doesn't give a shit. He's not gonna let us back.
He's like, oh, we were Chad was helping us out.
He's no, Chad asked for Chad. The guy's like, I
have not been in, I don't care about wrestling. I
get off.
Speaker 3: I don't know Chad.
Speaker 1: Two hours. I don't give a ship.
Speaker 2: Yeah, my brain is not processing that. I'm not getting
my way, and I have a gun in a chat
Chad needs us just bugging this cop.
Speaker 1: Yep, yeah, he I I was so I couldn't tell
whether I was suffering second hand embarrassment or if it
was hilarious. It was a little bit of.
Speaker 2: I just tried to butt my head again something until
I get my way, and I just could not realize, why,
why is this not working? Chad?
Speaker 1: That would absolutely, I think, be it what was happening?
Speaker 3: Yeah, I got another one for Dan, which is getting
arrested for starting a public fight because he walked in
the exit of a bathroom because the entrance has a
line and he walks in the entrance that he doesn't
brand in line, and someone finally calls you out on it.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: But here's the thing I've It's been a long time
since I've done it, because I've typically been in the
press box, which has a dedicated bathroom, which is amazing.
But if I were I would do it again. I
would do it again.
Speaker 3: I know you would. And I think one day someone's
gonna call your.
Speaker 2: Number, but they do sometimes, And this is how it goes.
You start walking in the exit and you hear someone
from down the line be like asshole, and by the
time anything can be done, you're already in there. Pissing.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Dan doesn't wait skip.
Speaker 2: The line and get in there to beat my ass.
Speaker 1: No, oh god, yeah, it'd be funny.
Speaker 3: True, there's like a social contract that you're allowed to
call someone an asshole for skipping the line, but you
don't want to get out of the line, right.
Speaker 2: You have to get out of line and then him
like no, it's a.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you got to stay.
Speaker 2: It's the perfect crime.
Speaker 1: What if but you if you run into him on
the way out.
Speaker 3: The perfect crime is no, lie, he has to peek.
Speaker 1: No, you're on the way out and he's in line
and you have to walk by him, and he reached.
Speaker 2: He's not going to get out of line to kick
my ass.
Speaker 1: He has to pee, but you're walking right by him.
He doesn't need to leave a spot.
Speaker 2: I am just like a shot on the night. I'm
just like back to my seat, like it's just no,
it's perfect.
Speaker 1: Okay, perfect. I could see that being it too, But yeah, Marry,
I think that's what.
Speaker 3: A perfect crime means. A perfect crime is like there's
no it's a victimless crime. There's like nothing that I.
Speaker 2: Wouldn't know, they would know.
Speaker 1: Perfect crime is like there's literally no way to prove
it with you.
Speaker 2: Oh, it's very easy to prove it's me. There's probably
on camera at a million different arenas.
Speaker 1: I someone I know often flies to other cities and
kills people and leaves, just picks a random city. It's
someone I know, I don't know. Oh, I know it is,
and he leaves and he comes back, and no one
there's body perfect crime.
Speaker 2: The bodies are victimless.
Speaker 1: I think it's victim for it for the victim, but like,
no one cares about this victim.
Speaker 3: Outside of the victim. It's victimless.
Speaker 1: No, I mean leaving aside the victim, it's they're dead.
Get over It's fine. Once the victims dead, it's like
they don't They literally don't exist. So I don't see
how they could be a victim anymore because they're just
not victim. My friend does the same internal monologue ey
time he kills someone. To adjust be lawyers. Yeah, that
would that'd be a really strong defense.
Speaker 3: Called to the stand. The person who was murdered.
Speaker 2: Oh, I didn't show up, must not have been that bad.
Speaker 1: If they really wanted to not die, they would have
put up more of a fight and not died.
Speaker 2: Yeah, simple to me.
Speaker 1: The pedant lawyer. Yeah, I don't, I don't who I
think Mary is the most likely to get I digressed.
Speaker 2: I was going to say that too. Yes, Mary's not
it's not an attack. It's just that I think that's realistic.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 3: I reluctantly accept this award.
Speaker 1: Thank you, well, thank you Morgan from New Orleans, morlans
h Well, that's our show. Those are the emails.
Speaker 3: Thank you.
Speaker 1: But daytime recording one.
Speaker 2: Of the rare ones. Yes we could. I mean, it's
not a fisher yet because we haven't recorded it. But
the plan is we're actually going to do a little
recording here right after.
Speaker 1: I think so. Yeah, we'll promote that on our channels
if we do.
Speaker 2: Keep an eye on the On the Patreon, we'll definitely
have the Warhammer stuff and maybe maybe a little bonus.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's a there's two episodes up on Firescape of
Vinian Mike Save the World, and I believe the second
episode of Vinie Mike Destroy the World is up as
of today, the twenty fourth, March twenty fourth. If you
haven't watched it, and if you're not a Next Lander
subscriber patron, go subscribe. We also have merch at fire
Escape Merch, Firescape cast merch.
Speaker 2: We never know is it deep dish pussy?
Speaker 1: Now Deep Dish Pussy is our patreon. Oh right, fire escape.
Speaker 3: URLs, I can remember them.
Speaker 1: I have very interesting conversations with our accountants. Come tax
seasons pussy.
Speaker 3: Yeah, we bought that at a loss.
Speaker 1: It's not fire write that off.
Speaker 3: Right that off to our text guy, right.
Speaker 1: Off, Escape cast merch. Okay, just search fire Escape on
fourth Wall. You can get some sick bikinis, tied I shirts. God,
that bikini is so sick. Get some. You can get
a fucking about the Author.
Speaker 3: Tank time season is coming.
Speaker 1: You get some banana yellow banana hammock trunks. Those aren't
banana hammocks. You can get some water bottles, some hoodies
want to I want these coasters. Why the funk aren't
people telling me about these coasters? More? Send fote buy
these coasters, the mouse pads, not the about the Author one.
I'll freak out that one. Get the oh dorky Christmas
beanie that's sick is the season? Uh yeah, there's a
I think we got a vibrator something.
Speaker 3: The most wonderful time of the.
Speaker 1: Go. Buy stuff there. We're over at on Patreon. If
you want to get some ad free episodes, or you
want to watch vide Mike Save the World, or just
get video versions of the episodes, you can go over
We got several tiers, or if you just appreciate what
we do, we want to treat like a tip jar.
We are over at deep dishpussy dot com and uh
we'll be back in a couple of weeks. Dan, what
do you have going on in the meantime?
Speaker 2: Oh, lots of Giant Bomb stuff going on the power
Block every day. We're streaming for like four or five
six hours a day, So just check out Giant Bomb
or game spot on Twitch and YouTube. We're streaming a
lot of fun stuff about to make Jeff Grebb start
playing the game over Blood for Blake Clubs, So keep
an eye out.
Speaker 1: Mary. What about you?
Speaker 3: I stream on Mondays. That's how I found some of
these sick games that I talked about on this EPI.
So if you want to see me play them before
I talk about them, check out my my twitch so
you can watch me stream these games that I like
so much or don't like sick. What about you?
Speaker 1: What are you doing? What do you do? Games wise? Nothing?
I'm I'm a I got a wine test coming up.
Can't really follow me there though, No, I mean I could,
you could. Yeah, I'm just I'm here. That's and that's
good enough for me. I know you too. You need
your popularity, and your your fucking popular.
Speaker 3: I am a little sick, burned.
Speaker 1: Popular. I got my I collect fuck that isapolis.
Speaker 2: I mean, I'm not disagree with it.
Speaker 3: These are perfect. I can't ask for a more perfect impression.
Speaker 1: I love Portland. I'm so cool. I love pickles, I
love French bulldogs. My house is sick, my neighborhood is sweet.
I've got a neighbor. I've got a neighbor who raises robots.
Speaker 3: Robots.
Speaker 1: I have a phone if they were his own. I've
got a phone at the bottom of the will of Lammit,
and it's pronounced well Lammit, damn it.
Speaker 2: Uh.
Speaker 1: It's sweet here. It's the best city in the world.
I'm into couzy games.
Speaker 3: I remember one time, I forget the context, but you
said that my phone was at the bottom of the
Willama and that's a shame because I have so many
texts on it because I'm so popular. You done got
my phone back and I was like, I probably do
have a lot of unreads on that phone.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's probably still there. It probably hasn't run out
of juice yet.
Speaker 3: To this day, there is a fish swimming by my
phone at the bottom of that river, and it is
sad because that is a perfect, in good condition I
phone in a perfect waterproof bag. It's going to be
there for a long time.
Speaker 1: Just FaceTime with a fucking barracuda. I don't think there
are barracudas in the Wi Lama, but.
Speaker 3: I don't.
Speaker 1: I'd be concerning if they're a piranha in the river
running through Portland.
Speaker 3: There's barely fish in there. It's pretty polluted.
Speaker 1: Well, everybody, thank you for joining. We will be back
in a couple of weeks the new episode. In the meantime,
go to our Patreon watch that stuff.
Speaker 2: And I'm giving you to a homework assignment for that
Embargered game that I want to talk about next time. Yeah,
I wonder if thembargo will even be up by the
time that comes out. Yes, the day I think the
embargo is that day? No, ye, yep, okay, we're good
to take a look at that. I don't know, but o, yes,
there's a game. I want talk to you too.
Speaker 1: About We can delay the episode a few hours if
we need to. We'll be back see you then.
Speaker 3: Bye.