Speaker 1: Welcome to Pastor Rick's Daily Hope, the Bible teaching ministry
Speaker 1: that's here to encourage and inspire.
Speaker 2: You every day.
Speaker 1: Well, today we're starting a series called Awesome Relationships. In
Speaker 1: this series, Rick warrens Shure's practical ways to help you
Speaker 1: take your relationship with family, friends, co workers, and even
Speaker 1: God from ordinary to extraordinary. This is a series you
Speaker 1: won't want to miss. Hey, let's jump right in with
Speaker 1: part one of a message called fighting for an Awesome Marriage.
Speaker 2: This weekend, I want us look at fighting for an
Speaker 2: Awesome Marriage. Take out your notes and look at the
Speaker 2: first of the top. Paul says this. Now, Paul was
Speaker 2: not married. Paul was a single adult, and Saint Paul
Speaker 2: says this Onet Corinthian seven to seven. We're all given
Speaker 2: different gifts. God gives the gift of marriage to some,
Speaker 2: and to others he gives the gift of singleness. So
Speaker 2: not everybody's supposed to be married. God says in his
Speaker 2: Word that we get different gifts from him. Some he
Speaker 2: gives the gift of marriage, and some he gives the
Speaker 2: gift of singleness. Old translations call it the gift of celibacy.
Speaker 2: But everybody knows what it is it's singleness. Now, how
Speaker 2: do you know if you have the gift of singleness?
Speaker 2: I know you're waiting with baited breath for this. And
Speaker 2: here's the way. If you have any desire to get
Speaker 2: married someday, you don't have this gift. That's the telltale sign. Okay,
Speaker 2: if you say, you know, really, i'd like to be
Speaker 2: married someday, I'd like to have a wife, I'd like
Speaker 2: to have a husband, then you don't have the gift
Speaker 2: of singleness. The gift of singleness, when God gives it,
Speaker 2: means I'm perfectly happy to live the rest of my
Speaker 2: life not married. That's the gift a single Now, whether
Speaker 2: you are have never been married, or you're divorced, or
Speaker 2: you're separated, or you're widowed, or you are currently married,
Speaker 2: regardless of what state you're in, the next verse applies
Speaker 2: to all of us. Look at this verse Hebrews thirteen
Speaker 2: to four. Marriage should be honored. Read it with me
Speaker 2: by everyone. Circle that by everyone. So regardless of whether
Speaker 2: I ever marry or not, or whether I've been married
Speaker 2: in the past and I'm not now, I am to
Speaker 2: honor marriage. The Bible says, by God everyone is to
Speaker 2: give honor to marriage. Now, sadly, marriage is no longer
Speaker 2: honored by everyone in our society. In fact, just the
Speaker 2: exact opposite. Today, marriage is dismissed as irrelevant by many people,
Speaker 2: as an archaic They who needs to get married? That's
Speaker 2: something somebody made it in another generation or in another culture,
Speaker 2: a man made lifestyle choice. And really it's dismissed. Nobody
Speaker 2: needs to getting married today. It's demeaned by many people.
Speaker 2: Marriages demean as a career buster. You're getting married, well,
Speaker 2: there goes your career. It's down the pike, it's down
Speaker 2: the tube. Marriage is delayed. People are delaying marriage more
Speaker 2: and more, many times for the wrong reasons. Now they're
Speaker 2: good reasons for delaying marriage, but they're also selfish reasons
Speaker 2: for delaying marriage. Marriage is being redefined. It's being ridiculed.
Speaker 2: It's being demeaned, it's being denounced, it's being discouraged. Marriage
Speaker 2: is disrespected. We don't live in a culture where marriage
Speaker 2: is honored by everyone anymore, and even Christians fall for
Speaker 2: this trap. And part of the problem is nobody knows
Speaker 2: the basics of marriage anymore. Fifty years ago, if I
Speaker 2: were to go out on the street, say tell me
Speaker 2: the purposes of marriage. They could give you the five
Speaker 2: or six purposes of marriage. Nobody knows these today, and
Speaker 2: so marriage is treated like just one more little lifestyle choice.
Speaker 2: It is not. It's far more important than you realize,
Speaker 2: whether you ever get married yourself or not, and it's
Speaker 2: absolutely essential. God gave it to us marriage for six reasons.
Speaker 2: Most people don't know why marriage matters. In fact, most
Speaker 2: people either a have an incredibly unrealistic view of marriage,
Speaker 2: which there's no way anybody could measure up to it.
Speaker 2: Or two they're just flat out wrong about the meaning
Speaker 2: and the purpose and the design of marriage. Most people
Speaker 2: don't get it right now, The reality is marriage won't
Speaker 2: solve all your problems. Let me correct that. Marriage won't
Speaker 2: solve any of your problems. Anybody married, want to give
Speaker 2: a testimony right now? Okay? Now, a lot of people
Speaker 2: think marriage creates problems. I didn't have the problems until
Speaker 2: I got married. Oh no, no, no, that's wrong too.
Speaker 2: Marriage doesn't solve your problems. Marriage doesn't create your problems.
Speaker 2: Marriage reveals problems. It reveals problems. If I'm cranky, my
Speaker 2: marriage is gonna reveal it. If I'm a perfectionist, my
Speaker 2: marriage is gonna reveal it. If I'm fearful and insecure
Speaker 2: and a worry what my marriage is going to reveal it.
Speaker 2: If I'm bitter and angry and controlling and manipulative, my
Speaker 2: marriage is gonna reveal it. Marriage don't create problems. Marriage
Speaker 2: reveal them. They just show up in marriages like in
Speaker 2: no other relationship. I've got friends who've gone through multiple relationships,
Speaker 2: and some have been in multiple marriages, and sometimes I'm
Speaker 2: counseling somebody else I don't understand. You know, I've been
Speaker 2: married multiple times that my relationships just suck, And I
Speaker 2: want to say, well, what do you think is the
Speaker 2: common denominator you are? You know what the problem with
Speaker 2: my marriage is me? You know what the problem with
Speaker 2: your marriage is you? And so we bring problems into marriage,
Speaker 2: and marriage simply magnifies what's already a problem that maybe
Speaker 2: it's masked when I'm living as a single adult. So
Speaker 2: marriage isn't going to solve all your problems. It reveals them.
Speaker 2: Marriage will not turn your life into a picnic. Marriage
Speaker 2: will not balance the harmonic convergence of the universe. There
Speaker 2: are a lot of things marriage can't do, but it
Speaker 2: does have a God designed function. It does have a
Speaker 2: God designed form, and it is far more important. Marriage
Speaker 2: is far more important than you realize. Now I can't
Speaker 2: go into these six reasons but in detail, but I
Speaker 2: want you to just list these before we get into
Speaker 2: how do you fight for an awesome Marria. I want
Speaker 2: you to know the six reasons why marriage matters, this
Speaker 2: brief overview, because you need to be able to explain
Speaker 2: it to other people, because nobody around you, nobody in culture,
Speaker 2: nobody you know getting married or getting divorced, knows all
Speaker 2: six of these. They just don't think about them. So
Speaker 2: let's look why God designed marriage number one. Write these down. First,
Speaker 2: God created marriage for the connection of men and women.
Speaker 2: Now I want to show you a verse up on
Speaker 2: the screen in just second. First Corinthians eleven eleven says
Speaker 2: this on the screen. In God's plan, men and women
Speaker 2: need each other. Do you know how radical a statement
Speaker 2: that is? Today a lot of people don't believe that.
Speaker 2: There are a lot of people that women they don't
Speaker 2: need men? Why would I need a man? And a
Speaker 2: lot of men say why would I need a woman?
Speaker 2: Well you do, and the God who designed you creative,
Speaker 2: whether you ever get married or not. If you're a woman,
Speaker 2: you need men in your life. If you're a man,
Speaker 2: you need women in your life. Why. Because nobody holds
Speaker 2: the full image of God. Women get part of it,
Speaker 2: Men get part of it, and we need each other.
Speaker 2: God wired it this way. God thought up gender, God
Speaker 2: thought up sex. What a God? And God thought up marriage.
Speaker 2: He thought it all up. It was his idea. It
Speaker 2: wasn't some man made construct. Now the Bible goes back
Speaker 2: to the very beginning, in the creation of the first
Speaker 2: couple and the first marriage. And in Genesis chapter two,
Speaker 2: the Bible says, God creates Adam, and he doesn't make
Speaker 2: Eve yet. Why did God make man and then woman
Speaker 2: a little bit later? Why didn't you make up both
Speaker 2: the same time, because obviously he had every attention. I
Speaker 2: think he did it for Adam's benefit. I think Adam,
Speaker 2: You wanted Adam to realize how much he needed women
Speaker 2: in his life. Now, the Bible says this in Genesis
Speaker 2: to eighteen. It is not good. This is God talking.
Speaker 2: It is not good for the man that's Adam to
Speaker 2: be alone. I will make a companion who is right
Speaker 2: for him. I'll make a companion who is right for him.
Speaker 2: I will make. Now notice the first thing you need
Speaker 2: to realize is that marriage gender, sex, men and women,
Speaker 2: all the differences. This is a God given thing and
Speaker 2: God intended marriage. One of the purposes of marriage is
Speaker 2: as an antidote to loneliness. Look at the next verse.
Speaker 2: He says there it is not good for men to
Speaker 2: be alone. Now, there are many, he says, I'm going
Speaker 2: to make a companion, And many companions are important in life.
Speaker 2: You need companions in all your areas, but there's nothing
Speaker 2: like the companionship of the marriage. You can talk to
Speaker 2: any married couple and they will tell you, Yes, there
Speaker 2: are many other kinds of relationships, and they're all good
Speaker 2: in life, but nothing at all compares to the companionship
Speaker 2: of a man and a woman who are committed to
Speaker 2: each other for the rest of their lives. There's no
Speaker 2: other relationship that could possibly compare. That has then a
Speaker 2: relational class by itself, and God calls that marriage. Now
Speaker 2: here's what Jesus had to say about it, Mark ten.
Speaker 2: God's plan has been seen from the beginning of creation
Speaker 2: when He made us male and female. God made males,
Speaker 2: God made females, and God shows what He wanted you
Speaker 2: to be. This explains why a man leaves his father
Speaker 2: and mother and is joined to his wife, and the
Speaker 2: two are united as one body. Now since they are
Speaker 2: no longer two but one, God sees a married couple
Speaker 2: as one should separate them, for God has joined them together. Now,
Speaker 2: there's a very important passage of scripture, and I can
Speaker 2: spend a lot of time on it. Let me just
Speaker 2: make three points out it. That passage says three things.
Speaker 2: Number One, marriage is God's plan. It's not a human plan.
Speaker 2: It's not a human idea. It's not a tradition that
Speaker 2: we could just throw out. God invented marriage, when he
Speaker 2: invented you, when he invented me, when he invented humanity.
Speaker 2: Marriage is God's plan. Second thing that verse says is
Speaker 2: that marriage is between a man and a woman. A
Speaker 2: lot of other relationships but those aren't marriage. Marriage is
Speaker 2: between a man and a woman and their body parts
Speaker 2: fit together, and they fit together for a purpose the
Speaker 2: creation of everybody else. And the third thing it says
Speaker 2: is marriage is to be permanent. It says what God
Speaker 2: joins together. God joins a couple in marriage, no one,
Speaker 2: no one else should separate it's meant to be to
Speaker 2: be Like, do you realize how radical those three statements are.
Speaker 2: That marriage is God's idea and plan, that marriage is
Speaker 2: for a man and a woman, and that marriage is
Speaker 2: to be permanent. Nobody believes that anymore. But it's still
Speaker 2: the truth. It's still the truth. It's still the way
Speaker 2: God designed marriage. And just because we live in the
Speaker 2: real not necessarily the ideal, doesn't mean we get to
Speaker 2: say the ideal doesn't exist. It does. It does now.
Speaker 2: As a pastor, I have done I don't know how
Speaker 2: many thousands of weddings. I couldn't count how many weddings
Speaker 2: I've done. One of the things I like about the
Speaker 2: modern wedding is that people are writing their vows. Now.
Speaker 2: I think that's good in one sense, because it's better
Speaker 2: than just saying I do. I mean, when people write
Speaker 2: their own vows, they tend to express more of themselves
Speaker 2: than you get to hear their love and for the
Speaker 2: other person, that's a good thing. But there's also a
Speaker 2: downside of keeping people writing their own vows to and
Speaker 2: it's this they're leaving out God. I can't tell you
Speaker 2: how many vows I've heard that are really more like
Speaker 2: a junior high social contract. I would love you as
Speaker 2: long as this as the sun shines. Well, what happens
Speaker 2: when it rains tomorrow? Okay, you get a divorce, then
Speaker 2: I will love you because you make me feel so great. Well,
Speaker 2: what happens when they get in the hospital and they
Speaker 2: can't make you feel great? Do you divorce them? Then
Speaker 2: I love you because you're so beautiful. What I hate
Speaker 2: to tell you this, She's going to lose her beauty
Speaker 2: and you already have. Okay, that's I love you if
Speaker 2: I love you, If that's conditional love, that's not a
Speaker 2: love that makes a marriage last. So a lot of
Speaker 2: contracts today in marriage really sound like a you know,
Speaker 2: thirty six month lease for an auto. It's like, I
Speaker 2: love you as long as we both shall love. Really,
Speaker 2: I love you till debt do us part or divorce
Speaker 2: do us part. They're leaving out God. The first thing
Speaker 2: about marriage is that God created it, and he created
Speaker 2: it for the connection of a man and a woman
Speaker 2: for life. Number two, God created marriage for the multiplication
Speaker 2: of the human race, for the multiplication of the human race.
Speaker 2: It's how we all got here. You are sitting where
Speaker 2: you're sitting, and you were listening online where you're listening
Speaker 2: online because a couple got together and made you, and
Speaker 2: this was God's idea. God populated the human planet through
Speaker 2: marriage for thousands of years. Billions of people have come
Speaker 2: into existence because men and women got married. And God says,
Speaker 2: this is part of my plan. Now, let me give
Speaker 2: you a little background on this. The Bible says that
Speaker 2: God is love. We've talked about this many times. That's
Speaker 2: his character, it's his nature. The only reason there's love
Speaker 2: in the universe is because God is love. If God
Speaker 2: was not a loving God, you would not have any
Speaker 2: love in your life. There would be no love in
Speaker 2: the universe. The only reason you are able to love
Speaker 2: is because you, as a man or woman, were created
Speaker 2: in God's image. Squirrels don't love because they're not made
Speaker 2: in God's image. Worms don't love because they're not made
Speaker 2: in God's image. Ants don't love because they're not made
Speaker 2: in God's image. But men and women have the capacity
Speaker 2: to love because we're made in God's image. And God said,
Speaker 2: I want to love, and I want to express my love.
Speaker 2: And the Bible says everything that God has made, he
Speaker 2: made it simply in order to love it. You were
Speaker 2: made in order for God to love you. That's why
Speaker 2: you exist. If God didn't want to love you, you
Speaker 2: wouldn't exist. In the universe. God made to love it.
Speaker 2: And the Bible says that God created the universe because
Speaker 2: he wanted a family to love. So he created the
Speaker 2: universe so he could create the human race, so he
Speaker 2: could love us, knowing that some of us would choose
Speaker 2: to love him back, and then we would live with
Speaker 2: him forever and ever and ever in his eternal family
Speaker 2: in heaven. Now think about this. God chose everybody who's
Speaker 2: going to be in heaven to come into existence through
Speaker 2: marriage and sex. That's the way he chose. Nobody would
Speaker 2: be in heaven if God hadn't created marriage, because everybody's
Speaker 2: come into existence through the tool that he designed. Now,
Speaker 2: let me show you some verses. Genesis one twenty seven
Speaker 2: says this, For God created people in his own image.
Speaker 2: He patterned them after himself, creating both male and female
Speaker 2: with his image. Then, so not every males don't have
Speaker 2: on the image of God. Females, we both get parts
Speaker 2: of God's image. Then God blessed them and commanded them.
Speaker 2: Now here's the very first command God gives to the
Speaker 2: human race. I want you to read it aloud with
Speaker 2: great GUSTO. Ready, here we go. God commanded them be
Speaker 2: fruitful and multiply and fill the earth. Wow. So God's
Speaker 2: first command to the human races get married and have sex. That,
Speaker 2: by the way, friends, is the only command of God
Speaker 2: the human race has been able to keep. And we've
Speaker 2: done a pretty good job at that one. They're about
Speaker 2: seven billion of us on the planet because your parents
Speaker 2: and their parents, and their parents and their parents and
Speaker 2: their parents were fruitful and multiplied and fill the land,
Speaker 2: fill the world. So we're all here. The point is
Speaker 2: that God says one of the purposes of marriage is
Speaker 2: for the multiplication of the human race. It's not the
Speaker 2: only purpose, but it's a big one. Look at this
Speaker 2: next verse Malachi two fifteen. I love this in the
Speaker 2: message paraphrase, God, not you made marriage. His spirit inhabits
Speaker 2: even the smallest details of marriage. And why does he
Speaker 2: eat God? What does God want from marriage? He's real clear,
Speaker 2: godly children from your union. Because if people don't have kids,
Speaker 2: those kids aren't going to be born. They can't get
Speaker 2: into heaven. He wants godly children from a union. So
Speaker 2: guard the spirit of marriage. Within you. Now, this is
Speaker 2: not an indictment for a childless couple who don't have kids.
Speaker 2: There are couples who want kids and for whatever reason
Speaker 2: cannot have them or have been unable to have them.
Speaker 2: And if you can't, if you're married, you can't have kids.
Speaker 2: God is not disappointed in you. That's not what this
Speaker 2: voice versus saying. What it is saying is that we're
Speaker 2: all alive because some couple got together and for thousands
Speaker 2: of years God has used marriage to populate heaven.
Speaker 1: Wow. Some powerful words from Pastor Rick today. And now
Speaker 1: this is really one of my favorite parts of the broadcast.
Speaker 1: This is letters from our listeners, and now here's Rick.
Speaker 2: Let me ask you a very personal question. Are you
Speaker 2: struggling in one of your personal relationships? If you are,
Speaker 2: I want you to listen to what Joe writes. He
Speaker 2: just sent this note to me. He's a pastor Rick.
Speaker 2: Before my wife and I began listening to Daily Hope together,
Speaker 2: we'd argue our faith. There'd be days that I'd be
Speaker 2: angry with my wife, thinking that she wasn't moving as
Speaker 2: fast as her walk as I thought she should be moving.
Speaker 2: And God really challenged me to trust him in helping
Speaker 2: her grow by changing me first. Got it? You got it, Joe?
Speaker 2: He says, He broke my heart and my attitude by
Speaker 2: allowing me to figure out what I needed to do
Speaker 2: to stop arguing with her. And then he added, God
Speaker 2: also challenged me by showing me how much He believed
Speaker 2: in me through my wife. When I'd get angry, she'd
Speaker 2: show me grace and patience. These are the very things
Speaker 2: that I lacked, but I didn't see it until after
Speaker 2: we started listening to Daily Hope on a regular basis.
Speaker 2: We've since made it a point to share this time
Speaker 2: in God's word and to continue to grow in our
Speaker 2: love for Jesus and each other. Isn't it amazing what
Speaker 2: God can do even in the most difficult to circumstances,
Speaker 2: and even in relationships that seemed beyond repair. I want
Speaker 2: you to notice that in Joe's story, God started the
Speaker 2: transformation with Joe. Joe wanted to change his wife, and
Speaker 2: Joe wanted God to change his wife, but God wanted
Speaker 2: Joe to change first in his own life. That's the
Speaker 2: way God works. I'm so glad that God is using
Speaker 2: Daily Hope to change lives, and if He's changed your life,
Speaker 2: would you tell me about it? Please just write me
Speaker 2: email me Rick at Pastorrick dot com. Please do that today.
Speaker 2: Just email me a note that says, here's what's happening
Speaker 2: in my life. Here's what I need you to pray about.
Speaker 2: Here's something I'm rejoicing with. If you've got something to
Speaker 2: share it, let me know about it. Write me Rick
Speaker 2: at Pastororrick dot com. And thanks for listening today and
Speaker 2: all this week. Let's let God transform our lives to
Speaker 2: his word.
Speaker 1: Be sure to join us next time as we look
Speaker 1: into God's word for our daily hope. This program is
Speaker 1: sponsored by Pastor Rick's Daily Hope and your generous financial
Speaker 1: support