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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Pastor Rick's Daily Hope, the Bible teaching ministry

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<v Speaker 1>that's here to encourage and inspire.

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<v Speaker 2>You every day.

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<v Speaker 1>Well, today we're starting a series called Awesome Relationships. In

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<v Speaker 1>this series, Rick warrens Shure's practical ways to help you

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<v Speaker 1>take your relationship with family, friends, co workers, and even

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<v Speaker 1>God from ordinary to extraordinary. This is a series you

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<v Speaker 1>won't want to miss. Hey, let's jump right in with

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<v Speaker 1>part one of a message called fighting for an Awesome Marriage.

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<v Speaker 2>This weekend, I want us look at fighting for an

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<v Speaker 2>Awesome Marriage. Take out your notes and look at the

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<v Speaker 2>first of the top. Paul says this. Now, Paul was

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<v Speaker 2>not married. Paul was a single adult, and Saint Paul

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<v Speaker 2>says this Onet Corinthian seven to seven. We're all given

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<v Speaker 2>different gifts. God gives the gift of marriage to some,

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<v Speaker 2>and to others he gives the gift of singleness. So

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<v Speaker 2>not everybody's supposed to be married. God says in his

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<v Speaker 2>Word that we get different gifts from him. Some he

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<v Speaker 2>gives the gift of marriage, and some he gives the

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<v Speaker 2>gift of singleness. Old translations call it the gift of celibacy.

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<v Speaker 2>But everybody knows what it is it's singleness. Now, how

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<v Speaker 2>do you know if you have the gift of singleness?

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<v Speaker 2>I know you're waiting with baited breath for this. And

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<v Speaker 2>here's the way. If you have any desire to get

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<v Speaker 2>married someday, you don't have this gift. That's the telltale sign. Okay,

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<v Speaker 2>if you say, you know, really, i'd like to be

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<v Speaker 2>married someday, I'd like to have a wife, I'd like

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<v Speaker 2>to have a husband, then you don't have the gift

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<v Speaker 2>of singleness. The gift of singleness, when God gives it,

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<v Speaker 2>means I'm perfectly happy to live the rest of my

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<v Speaker 2>life not married. That's the gift a single Now, whether

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<v Speaker 2>you are have never been married, or you're divorced, or

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<v Speaker 2>you're separated, or you're widowed, or you are currently married,

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<v Speaker 2>regardless of what state you're in, the next verse applies

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<v Speaker 2>to all of us. Look at this verse Hebrews thirteen

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<v Speaker 2>to four. Marriage should be honored. Read it with me

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<v Speaker 2>by everyone. Circle that by everyone. So regardless of whether

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<v Speaker 2>I ever marry or not, or whether I've been married

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<v Speaker 2>in the past and I'm not now, I am to

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<v Speaker 2>honor marriage. The Bible says, by God everyone is to

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<v Speaker 2>give honor to marriage. Now, sadly, marriage is no longer

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<v Speaker 2>honored by everyone in our society. In fact, just the

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<v Speaker 2>exact opposite. Today, marriage is dismissed as irrelevant by many people,

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<v Speaker 2>as an archaic They who needs to get married? That's

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<v Speaker 2>something somebody made it in another generation or in another culture,

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<v Speaker 2>a man made lifestyle choice. And really it's dismissed. Nobody

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<v Speaker 2>needs to getting married today. It's demeaned by many people.

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<v Speaker 2>Marriages demean as a career buster. You're getting married, well,

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<v Speaker 2>there goes your career. It's down the pike, it's down

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<v Speaker 2>the tube. Marriage is delayed. People are delaying marriage more

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<v Speaker 2>and more, many times for the wrong reasons. Now they're

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<v Speaker 2>good reasons for delaying marriage, but they're also selfish reasons

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<v Speaker 2>for delaying marriage. Marriage is being redefined. It's being ridiculed.

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<v Speaker 2>It's being demeaned, it's being denounced, it's being discouraged. Marriage

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<v Speaker 2>is disrespected. We don't live in a culture where marriage

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<v Speaker 2>is honored by everyone anymore, and even Christians fall for

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<v Speaker 2>this trap. And part of the problem is nobody knows

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<v Speaker 2>the basics of marriage anymore. Fifty years ago, if I

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<v Speaker 2>were to go out on the street, say tell me

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<v Speaker 2>the purposes of marriage. They could give you the five

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<v Speaker 2>or six purposes of marriage. Nobody knows these today, and

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<v Speaker 2>so marriage is treated like just one more little lifestyle choice.

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<v Speaker 2>It is not. It's far more important than you realize,

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<v Speaker 2>whether you ever get married yourself or not, and it's

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<v Speaker 2>absolutely essential. God gave it to us marriage for six reasons.

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<v Speaker 2>Most people don't know why marriage matters. In fact, most

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<v Speaker 2>people either a have an incredibly unrealistic view of marriage,

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<v Speaker 2>which there's no way anybody could measure up to it.

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<v Speaker 2>Or two they're just flat out wrong about the meaning

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<v Speaker 2>and the purpose and the design of marriage. Most people

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<v Speaker 2>don't get it right now, The reality is marriage won't

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<v Speaker 2>solve all your problems. Let me correct that. Marriage won't

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<v Speaker 2>solve any of your problems. Anybody married, want to give

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<v Speaker 2>a testimony right now? Okay? Now, a lot of people

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<v Speaker 2>think marriage creates problems. I didn't have the problems until

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<v Speaker 2>I got married. Oh no, no, no, that's wrong too.

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<v Speaker 2>Marriage doesn't solve your problems. Marriage doesn't create your problems.

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<v Speaker 2>Marriage reveals problems. It reveals problems. If I'm cranky, my

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<v Speaker 2>marriage is gonna reveal it. If I'm a perfectionist, my

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<v Speaker 2>marriage is gonna reveal it. If I'm fearful and insecure

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<v Speaker 2>and a worry what my marriage is going to reveal it.

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<v Speaker 2>If I'm bitter and angry and controlling and manipulative, my

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<v Speaker 2>marriage is gonna reveal it. Marriage don't create problems. Marriage

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<v Speaker 2>reveal them. They just show up in marriages like in

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<v Speaker 2>no other relationship. I've got friends who've gone through multiple relationships,

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<v Speaker 2>and some have been in multiple marriages, and sometimes I'm

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<v Speaker 2>counseling somebody else I don't understand. You know, I've been

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<v Speaker 2>married multiple times that my relationships just suck, And I

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<v Speaker 2>want to say, well, what do you think is the

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<v Speaker 2>common denominator you are? You know what the problem with

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<v Speaker 2>my marriage is me? You know what the problem with

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<v Speaker 2>your marriage is you? And so we bring problems into marriage,

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<v Speaker 2>and marriage simply magnifies what's already a problem that maybe

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<v Speaker 2>it's masked when I'm living as a single adult. So

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<v Speaker 2>marriage isn't going to solve all your problems. It reveals them.

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<v Speaker 2>Marriage will not turn your life into a picnic. Marriage

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<v Speaker 2>will not balance the harmonic convergence of the universe. There

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<v Speaker 2>are a lot of things marriage can't do, but it

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<v Speaker 2>does have a God designed function. It does have a

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<v Speaker 2>God designed form, and it is far more important. Marriage

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<v Speaker 2>is far more important than you realize. Now I can't

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<v Speaker 2>go into these six reasons but in detail, but I

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<v Speaker 2>want you to just list these before we get into

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<v Speaker 2>how do you fight for an awesome Marria. I want

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<v Speaker 2>you to know the six reasons why marriage matters, this

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<v Speaker 2>brief overview, because you need to be able to explain

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<v Speaker 2>it to other people, because nobody around you, nobody in culture,

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<v Speaker 2>nobody you know getting married or getting divorced, knows all

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<v Speaker 2>six of these. They just don't think about them. So

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<v Speaker 2>let's look why God designed marriage number one. Write these down. First,

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<v Speaker 2>God created marriage for the connection of men and women.

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<v Speaker 2>God created marriage for the connection of men and women.

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<v Speaker 2>Now I want to show you a verse up on

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<v Speaker 2>the screen in just second. First Corinthians eleven eleven says

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<v Speaker 2>this on the screen. In God's plan, men and women

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<v Speaker 2>need each other. Do you know how radical a statement

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<v Speaker 2>that is? Today a lot of people don't believe that.

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<v Speaker 2>There are a lot of people that women they don't

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<v Speaker 2>need men? Why would I need a man? And a

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<v Speaker 2>lot of men say why would I need a woman?

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<v Speaker 2>Well you do, and the God who designed you creative,

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<v Speaker 2>whether you ever get married or not. If you're a woman,

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<v Speaker 2>you need men in your life. If you're a man,

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<v Speaker 2>you need women in your life. Why. Because nobody holds

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<v Speaker 2>the full image of God. Women get part of it,

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<v Speaker 2>Men get part of it, and we need each other.

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<v Speaker 2>God wired it this way. God thought up gender, God

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<v Speaker 2>thought up sex. What a God? And God thought up marriage.

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<v Speaker 2>He thought it all up. It was his idea. It

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<v Speaker 2>wasn't some man made construct. Now the Bible goes back

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<v Speaker 2>to the very beginning, in the creation of the first

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<v Speaker 2>couple and the first marriage. And in Genesis chapter two,

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<v Speaker 2>the Bible says, God creates Adam, and he doesn't make

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<v Speaker 2>Eve yet. Why did God make man and then woman

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<v Speaker 2>a little bit later? Why didn't you make up both

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<v Speaker 2>the same time, because obviously he had every attention. I

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<v Speaker 2>think he did it for Adam's benefit. I think Adam,

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<v Speaker 2>You wanted Adam to realize how much he needed women

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<v Speaker 2>in his life. Now, the Bible says this in Genesis

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<v Speaker 2>to eighteen. It is not good. This is God talking.

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<v Speaker 2>It is not good for the man that's Adam to

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<v Speaker 2>be alone. I will make a companion who is right

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<v Speaker 2>for him. I'll make a companion who is right for him.

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<v Speaker 2>I will make. Now notice the first thing you need

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<v Speaker 2>to realize is that marriage gender, sex, men and women,

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<v Speaker 2>all the differences. This is a God given thing and

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<v Speaker 2>God intended marriage. One of the purposes of marriage is

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<v Speaker 2>as an antidote to loneliness. Look at the next verse.

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<v Speaker 2>He says there it is not good for men to

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<v Speaker 2>be alone. Now, there are many, he says, I'm going

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<v Speaker 2>to make a companion, And many companions are important in life.

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<v Speaker 2>You need companions in all your areas, but there's nothing

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<v Speaker 2>like the companionship of the marriage. You can talk to

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<v Speaker 2>any married couple and they will tell you, Yes, there

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<v Speaker 2>are many other kinds of relationships, and they're all good

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<v Speaker 2>in life, but nothing at all compares to the companionship

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<v Speaker 2>of a man and a woman who are committed to

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<v Speaker 2>each other for the rest of their lives. There's no

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<v Speaker 2>other relationship that could possibly compare. That has then a

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<v Speaker 2>relational class by itself, and God calls that marriage. Now

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<v Speaker 2>here's what Jesus had to say about it, Mark ten.

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<v Speaker 2>God's plan has been seen from the beginning of creation

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<v Speaker 2>when He made us male and female. God made males,

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<v Speaker 2>God made females, and God shows what He wanted you

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<v Speaker 2>to be. This explains why a man leaves his father

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<v Speaker 2>and mother and is joined to his wife, and the

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<v Speaker 2>two are united as one body. Now since they are

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<v Speaker 2>no longer two but one, God sees a married couple

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<v Speaker 2>as one should separate them, for God has joined them together. Now,

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<v Speaker 2>there's a very important passage of scripture, and I can

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<v Speaker 2>spend a lot of time on it. Let me just

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<v Speaker 2>make three points out it. That passage says three things.

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<v Speaker 2>Number One, marriage is God's plan. It's not a human plan.

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<v Speaker 2>It's not a human idea. It's not a tradition that

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<v Speaker 2>we could just throw out. God invented marriage, when he

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<v Speaker 2>invented you, when he invented me, when he invented humanity.

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<v Speaker 2>Marriage is God's plan. Second thing that verse says is

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<v Speaker 2>that marriage is between a man and a woman. A

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<v Speaker 2>lot of other relationships but those aren't marriage. Marriage is

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<v Speaker 2>between a man and a woman and their body parts

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<v Speaker 2>fit together, and they fit together for a purpose the

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<v Speaker 2>creation of everybody else. And the third thing it says

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<v Speaker 2>is marriage is to be permanent. It says what God

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<v Speaker 2>joins together. God joins a couple in marriage, no one,

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<v Speaker 2>no one else should separate it's meant to be to

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<v Speaker 2>be Like, do you realize how radical those three statements are.

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<v Speaker 2>That marriage is God's idea and plan, that marriage is

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<v Speaker 2>for a man and a woman, and that marriage is

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<v Speaker 2>to be permanent. Nobody believes that anymore. But it's still

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<v Speaker 2>the truth. It's still the truth. It's still the way

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<v Speaker 2>God designed marriage. And just because we live in the

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<v Speaker 2>real not necessarily the ideal, doesn't mean we get to

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<v Speaker 2>say the ideal doesn't exist. It does. It does now.

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<v Speaker 2>As a pastor, I have done I don't know how

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<v Speaker 2>many thousands of weddings. I couldn't count how many weddings

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<v Speaker 2>I've done. One of the things I like about the

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<v Speaker 2>modern wedding is that people are writing their vows. Now.

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<v Speaker 2>I think that's good in one sense, because it's better

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<v Speaker 2>than just saying I do. I mean, when people write

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<v Speaker 2>their own vows, they tend to express more of themselves

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<v Speaker 2>than you get to hear their love and for the

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<v Speaker 2>other person, that's a good thing. But there's also a

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<v Speaker 2>downside of keeping people writing their own vows to and

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<v Speaker 2>it's this they're leaving out God. I can't tell you

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<v Speaker 2>how many vows I've heard that are really more like

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<v Speaker 2>a junior high social contract. I would love you as

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<v Speaker 2>long as this as the sun shines. Well, what happens

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<v Speaker 2>when it rains tomorrow? Okay, you get a divorce, then

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<v Speaker 2>I will love you because you make me feel so great. Well,

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<v Speaker 2>what happens when they get in the hospital and they

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<v Speaker 2>can't make you feel great? Do you divorce them? Then

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<v Speaker 2>I love you because you're so beautiful. What I hate

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<v Speaker 2>to tell you this, She's going to lose her beauty

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<v Speaker 2>and you already have. Okay, that's I love you if

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<v Speaker 2>I love you, If that's conditional love, that's not a

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<v Speaker 2>love that makes a marriage last. So a lot of

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<v Speaker 2>contracts today in marriage really sound like a you know,

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<v Speaker 2>thirty six month lease for an auto. It's like, I

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<v Speaker 2>love you as long as we both shall love. Really,

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<v Speaker 2>I love you till debt do us part or divorce

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<v Speaker 2>do us part. They're leaving out God. The first thing

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<v Speaker 2>about marriage is that God created it, and he created

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<v Speaker 2>it for the connection of a man and a woman

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<v Speaker 2>for life. Number two, God created marriage for the multiplication

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<v Speaker 2>of the human race, for the multiplication of the human race.

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<v Speaker 2>It's how we all got here. You are sitting where

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<v Speaker 2>you're sitting, and you were listening online where you're listening

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<v Speaker 2>online because a couple got together and made you, and

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<v Speaker 2>this was God's idea. God populated the human planet through

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<v Speaker 2>marriage for thousands of years. Billions of people have come

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<v Speaker 2>into existence because men and women got married. And God says,

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<v Speaker 2>this is part of my plan. Now, let me give

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<v Speaker 2>you a little background on this. The Bible says that

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<v Speaker 2>God is love. We've talked about this many times. That's

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<v Speaker 2>his character, it's his nature. The only reason there's love

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<v Speaker 2>in the universe is because God is love. If God

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<v Speaker 2>was not a loving God, you would not have any

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<v Speaker 2>love in your life. There would be no love in

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<v Speaker 2>the universe. The only reason you are able to love

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<v Speaker 2>is because you, as a man or woman, were created

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<v Speaker 2>in God's image. Squirrels don't love because they're not made

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<v Speaker 2>in God's image. Worms don't love because they're not made

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<v Speaker 2>in God's image. Ants don't love because they're not made

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<v Speaker 2>in God's image. But men and women have the capacity

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<v Speaker 2>to love because we're made in God's image. And God said,

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<v Speaker 2>I want to love, and I want to express my love.

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<v Speaker 2>And the Bible says everything that God has made, he

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<v Speaker 2>made it simply in order to love it. You were

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<v Speaker 2>made in order for God to love you. That's why

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<v Speaker 2>you exist. If God didn't want to love you, you

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<v Speaker 2>wouldn't exist. In the universe. God made to love it.

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<v Speaker 2>And the Bible says that God created the universe because

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<v Speaker 2>he wanted a family to love. So he created the

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<v Speaker 2>universe so he could create the human race, so he

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<v Speaker 2>could love us, knowing that some of us would choose

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<v Speaker 2>to love him back, and then we would live with

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<v Speaker 2>him forever and ever and ever in his eternal family

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<v Speaker 2>in heaven. Now think about this. God chose everybody who's

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<v Speaker 2>going to be in heaven to come into existence through

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<v Speaker 2>marriage and sex. That's the way he chose. Nobody would

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<v Speaker 2>be in heaven if God hadn't created marriage, because everybody's

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<v Speaker 2>come into existence through the tool that he designed. Now,

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<v Speaker 2>let me show you some verses. Genesis one twenty seven

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<v Speaker 2>says this, For God created people in his own image.

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<v Speaker 2>He patterned them after himself, creating both male and female

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<v Speaker 2>with his image. Then, so not every males don't have

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<v Speaker 2>on the image of God. Females, we both get parts

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<v Speaker 2>of God's image. Then God blessed them and commanded them.

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<v Speaker 2>Now here's the very first command God gives to the

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<v Speaker 2>human race. I want you to read it aloud with

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<v Speaker 2>great GUSTO. Ready, here we go. God commanded them be

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<v Speaker 2>fruitful and multiply and fill the earth. Wow. So God's

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<v Speaker 2>first command to the human races get married and have sex. That,

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<v Speaker 2>by the way, friends, is the only command of God

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<v Speaker 2>the human race has been able to keep. And we've

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<v Speaker 2>done a pretty good job at that one. They're about

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<v Speaker 2>seven billion of us on the planet because your parents

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<v Speaker 2>and their parents, and their parents and their parents and

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<v Speaker 2>their parents were fruitful and multiplied and fill the land,

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<v Speaker 2>fill the world. So we're all here. The point is

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<v Speaker 2>that God says one of the purposes of marriage is

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<v Speaker 2>for the multiplication of the human race. It's not the

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<v Speaker 2>only purpose, but it's a big one. Look at this

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<v Speaker 2>next verse Malachi two fifteen. I love this in the

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<v Speaker 2>message paraphrase, God, not you made marriage. His spirit inhabits

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<v Speaker 2>even the smallest details of marriage. And why does he

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<v Speaker 2>eat God? What does God want from marriage? He's real clear,

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<v Speaker 2>godly children from your union. Because if people don't have kids,

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<v Speaker 2>those kids aren't going to be born. They can't get

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<v Speaker 2>into heaven. He wants godly children from a union. So

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<v Speaker 2>guard the spirit of marriage. Within you. Now, this is

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<v Speaker 2>not an indictment for a childless couple who don't have kids.

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<v Speaker 2>There are couples who want kids and for whatever reason

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<v Speaker 2>cannot have them or have been unable to have them.

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<v Speaker 2>And if you can't, if you're married, you can't have kids.

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<v Speaker 2>God is not disappointed in you. That's not what this

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<v Speaker 2>voice versus saying. What it is saying is that we're

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<v Speaker 2>all alive because some couple got together and for thousands

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<v Speaker 2>of years God has used marriage to populate heaven.

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<v Speaker 1>Wow. Some powerful words from Pastor Rick today. And now

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<v Speaker 1>this is really one of my favorite parts of the broadcast.

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<v Speaker 1>This is letters from our listeners, and now here's Rick.

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<v Speaker 2>Let me ask you a very personal question. Are you

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<v Speaker 2>struggling in one of your personal relationships? If you are,

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<v Speaker 2>I want you to listen to what Joe writes. He

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<v Speaker 2>just sent this note to me. He's a pastor Rick.

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<v Speaker 2>Before my wife and I began listening to Daily Hope together,

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<v Speaker 2>we'd argue our faith. There'd be days that I'd be

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<v Speaker 2>angry with my wife, thinking that she wasn't moving as

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<v Speaker 2>fast as her walk as I thought she should be moving.

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<v Speaker 2>And God really challenged me to trust him in helping

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<v Speaker 2>her grow by changing me first. Got it? You got it, Joe?

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<v Speaker 2>He says, He broke my heart and my attitude by

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<v Speaker 2>allowing me to figure out what I needed to do

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<v Speaker 2>to stop arguing with her. And then he added, God

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<v Speaker 2>also challenged me by showing me how much He believed

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<v Speaker 2>in me through my wife. When I'd get angry, she'd

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<v Speaker 2>show me grace and patience. These are the very things

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<v Speaker 2>that I lacked, but I didn't see it until after

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<v Speaker 2>we started listening to Daily Hope on a regular basis.

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<v Speaker 2>We've since made it a point to share this time

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<v Speaker 2>in God's word and to continue to grow in our

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<v Speaker 2>love for Jesus and each other. Isn't it amazing what

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<v Speaker 2>God can do even in the most difficult to circumstances,

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<v Speaker 2>and even in relationships that seemed beyond repair. I want

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<v Speaker 2>you to notice that in Joe's story, God started the

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<v Speaker 2>transformation with Joe. Joe wanted to change his wife, and

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<v Speaker 2>Joe wanted God to change his wife, but God wanted

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<v Speaker 2>Joe to change first in his own life. That's the

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<v Speaker 2>way God works. I'm so glad that God is using

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<v Speaker 2>Daily Hope to change lives, and if He's changed your life,

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<v Speaker 2>would you tell me about it? Please just write me

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<v Speaker 2>email me Rick at Pastorrick dot com. Please do that today.

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<v Speaker 2>Just email me a note that says, here's what's happening

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<v Speaker 2>in my life. Here's what I need you to pray about.

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<v Speaker 2>Here's something I'm rejoicing with. If you've got something to

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<v Speaker 2>share it, let me know about it. Write me Rick

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<v Speaker 2>at Pastororrick dot com. And thanks for listening today and

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<v Speaker 2>all this week. Let's let God transform our lives to

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<v Speaker 2>his word.

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<v Speaker 1>Be sure to join us next time as we look

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<v Speaker 1>into God's word for our daily hope. This program is

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<v Speaker 1>sponsored by Pastor Rick's Daily Hope and your generous financial

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<v Speaker 1>support