Speaker 1: Stan.
Speaker 2: Hello everybody, Welcome back to Holly Randall Unfiltered. I want
to first welcome my new Patreon members JJ Patrick and Kevin.
If you are not a member of my Patreon, you
should be because for as little as five dollars a month,
you can watch these interviews lide streamed. You can also
get access to bonus Q and a content behind the
scenes of my shoots, and so much more. Go to
patreon dot com slash Holly Randall Unfiltered to check out
everything that I have to offer. But right now, I
am very excited to welcome an og milf to the
podcast today, not to mention an avid animal lover who's
not afraid to speak her mind. This veterinary technician turned
adult star disappeared from the industry in twenty fifteen to
start a family. However, she is back in the new
landscape of the only fans and content creation world while
working through veterinary school and juggling parenthood. Welcome the one
and only Capri Cavani. Hello, Hello, Hello, how are you?
Oh well, thank you, I'm good. So welcome back. Thank
the porn world. Yes, how long have you been back?
Twenty twenty? Okay, so years five years. Yeah, well I.
Speaker 1: Did only fans on twenty twenty, but I didn't actually
come back to porn porn until twenty three. Okay, Okay,
it took me a few years to get back at it, Yeah,
to get yes, yeah, to actually make that jump back in.
Speaker 2: Well, I want to get back into all of that,
like while you left, while you came back. But you know,
generally I like to start at the beginning. Yes, So
let's talk about, you know, your love for animals, because
I know that you know, that is something that actually
a lot of adult stars have like a great affinity
for animals, and like do I know a lot of
adult stars that do like rescue and work with animals.
I also know a lot of adult stars that do
like nursing, And I think there's a lot to be
said about like that nurturing side of people and then
also like nurturing boners. I don't know, but like there
is a there is a carrying intimacy to like both things, right,
there is.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I feel like a lot of adult stars are
so into animals, animal rescue. I know tons of chicks
are like, I give so much money to all these rescues,
and maybe it's just loving being able to love.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Like, I don't know. I think people forget about that.
You know. People often see porn as like this dirty,
you know, skeezy thing, But and it's root. It's about love, right, Yeah.
Speaker 1: It's about intimacy and love and feeling good. Yeah, so
that's at the end of the day, that's really what matters,
is feeling good.
Speaker 2: I agree. So do you remember when you first knew
that you wanted to like work with animals, Like when
how long have your have animals been like a big
part of your life?
Speaker 1: Since I was a little girl.
Speaker 2: So I was child.
Speaker 1: I got my first dog when I was nine, and
I disobeyed my mother and I took said dog on
a walk by myself when I wasn't supposed to fit.
I already said that okay, and the dog got attacked
by another dog. It was very traumatic. Oh no, I
was in deep shit with my mom. We were dirt
broke and she couldn't afford surgery to fix the dog,
and I was really upset about it because this was
my dog.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, So I knew that I wanted to make a difference.
I knew I wanted to help people who were broke
and genuinely loved their animals, but I had a hard
time paying when should hit the fan?
Speaker 2: Yeah much so.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I kind of made up my mind then. And
then along the way, I just veard to the left
a little bit.
Speaker 2: You went to the to the make money angle I
did first year. Well, you wanted to help the animals,
but then you realize it's actually very expensive to help
the animals, and so you went and the school down. Yeah.
Speaker 1: When I was younger, I was not going to commit
to that type of school.
Speaker 2: There was no way. There was no way. So you
wanted to be I feel like every kid wants to
be a vet growing up because like all kids love
animals and it sounds like such a cool like job.
Did you want to be a vet from that moment
or was it earlier?
Speaker 1: Okay, so from when I was nine. That's when I
realized what I wanted to do. But then once I
got into high school and realized I wasn't interested in school,
things were like I changed my mind. But so once
I graduated high school, I was trying to figure out
what to do. I was working as like a reception
I worked in offices for like car dealerships and water companies,
random things. And I actually went to school to become
a veterin and technician instead because that was easier define
a reachable goal.
Speaker 2: I mean veterinary school. You used to go to VET school.
I think longer than it is to be a doctor, right,
I don't know. I'm pretty sure it's like more schooling.
Speaker 1: It's well, I don't know how much a doctor is.
But VET school's four years for a bachelor's and then
four years for VET school. Right, I don't know what
med school is.
Speaker 2: Well, I think it depends on like what specific route
you take, right, Like you get your general like you
get a general medical degree, and then like obviously if
you want to specialize in neuroscience, it's like a whole difference,
right thing.
Speaker 1: But right, it's a lot, as I'm learning now, it's
a lot. But back then I was not interested in
committing to that whatsoever. I wanted to be my age.
I wanted to party. Yeah, I get it, I did.
Speaker 2: I get it. You know, it's funny. I also wanted
to be a VET when I was a kid, A
really big surprise. And I'm somebody who's really hard on
themselves about like achieving things, and so I had this
idea that if I was going to be a VET,
I had to start studying really early, so around the
age of I would say, more like maybe eleven ish.
My mom had this whole like veterinary series handbook. Like
it was a whole like series, right, I don't know,
there's like five books or something, and I would force
myself to read like a chapter or half to chapter
like every day because if I didn't do that, then
I would never be a VET. Now, like I was
like eleven, like that that stuff is unreadable now at
forty seven, you know what I mean. And it's like
so dense and it's literally meant for doctors. But I
remember being like, you have to read this otherwise you'll
never be a VET, and like I couldn't understand it.
I couldn't digest it. And I remember being so angry
at myself for not being able to understand it, and
like beating myself up about not understanding the veterinary Handbook
at like the knowledge. But yeah, that's funny. And then
I also realized that maybe that was not the path
for me, so I get that. Yeah, so okay, so
you're now you recognize, okay, veterinary technician much easier.
Speaker 1: Did that round the hospitals. I was broke, but I
loved what I did, Like I loved.
Speaker 2: Working in the hospital. Loved it.
Speaker 1: There was never a day that I said I hate
my job.
Speaker 2: Really, yes, what did you love about it? Because I
feel like for me, there would be a lot. There
must have been a lot of really hard moments.
Speaker 1: Of course, of course, but it's worth it. Yeah, because yeah,
when you get to help people, when you get to
help pets. My biggest what I get off on is
helping people help their pets. So when I can talk
to an owner and I can explain things, and I
know that that information that I tell them is going
to better this animal's life, I love that. Like, man, Yeah,
they're innocent little creatures, and there's so many people that
just don't know they love animals, but they're not like
a super geek about it, so they don't really know
what they're supposed to be doing. So yeah, in the hospital,
it was great. It was sad, of course it was.
There was some devastating moments. Yeah, but I think it
taught me, man, It taught me a lot, and it
taught me empathy. It taught me how to let go
of things because you have to know when it's the
time to let go. And that's again I dealt with
all my clients. I would help a lot of them.
So one of the most common questions I was asked
is when is it time for you know what?
Speaker 2: I feel like every single pet owner is that question.
Speaker 1: And legally, like we're not allowed to tell them right
now is the time? But I I would help educate
people to make the best choices and ultimately the animal
got the benefit of that.
Speaker 2: So, yeah, how do you like what would be? How
do you know? Yeah, how do you know?
Speaker 1: When there's no quality of life? So when they're not
eating on their own, when they can't get up, that's
when that's it. If there's no pep in their step,
if there's if you don't get even a glimmer of
a tailwag you But if they don't want to eat,
because food to animals is everything, right, If they're not eating, yeah,
then you know, but they're if they're let's say, if
they're not eating but they're still really happy, well then
there's probably just something wrong in medical attention, right right, Yeah,
quality of life, that's it, that's all it is. Some
people hold on for dear life and the animal ends
up suffering.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's the problem I remember like having because you know,
I've had quite a few dogs, and you know, unfortunately
I've had to put them all down. I mean, I
think that that's the way that most you know, if
they live a long life, that's how their life ends.
One dog that I loved, the best dog I've ever had,
Bonnie Scott Nails actually gave her to me. Really yeah,
she was the best dog in the world. And I remember,
like towards the end of her life, like I knew
that the day was coming, and every morning I woke
up like hoping she was dead, honestly because I didn't
want to have to make that decision because I knew that,
like like and I was like, please, just like can
she just die ready, sleep like on our own so
I don't have to be the one to do it
and have like a peaceful death. And yeah, I mean,
I you know, I remember that when I woke up
and she just looked at me and I was like,
this is the day. And it was awful. I mean,
you know, all the animals that I've had to put
down has been terrible. But yeah, I know it's definitely
and I always think how ironic it is that we
get to alleviate animals suffering, but we don't get to
do that with humans. They do in Canada. I know,
like I don't know. I'm a strong believer in euthanasia,
and I know that there's a lot of nuances around it,
and I know it's a very complicated situation because it
can definitely.
Speaker 1: Be abused the right situation. But in the right situation,
the old couple who they spent their whole lives together, Okay,
they were like in like their nineties or something. It
was just in Germany, and they want us to die together,
and so they did, and.
Speaker 2: It was beautiful, like they don't have a whole one. Yes,
it was so cute.
Speaker 1: Like I can't say death isn't cute, right, But what
I'm saying is that, right, just the fact that they
had this option to die together. They said their whole
lives they were together, and they wanted to end it
this way. And the government said.
Speaker 2: Okay, so I'm assuming one of them was like terminally
ill and then the other one was not. I guess
I guess it's just old.
Speaker 1: Yeah, interesting, right, Yeah, But if someone wants to do that,
then who are we to tell, you know, if they
don't have any mental health issues?
Speaker 2: Right? And that's where like I think the reb lies, Right,
how do you determine who has a mental health issue
and who is just ready to go? Yeah? You know.
But it's also like infuriating to me too that they,
you know, like the government will force you to keep
like somebody alive and they're just like this, they're just existing, right,
and they're not like there is no quality of life,
and and you have to assign like an advanced directive
to even you know, get to allow for your children
to like make the decision to like let you go.
I mean, that's what happened with my dad. You know,
we had to make the decision to take him off
life support. Oh wow, which is one hundred percent what
he would have wanted. I mean, he was he had
Parkinson's and he was starting to like decline like a lot.
And he actually went out in a better way than
he could have. He fell and he hit his head
and he ended up having a brain bleed and he
went to a koma. Oh wow, brain dead, And so
we let him go. It's okay, thank you, But I remember,
you know, when he was really starting to become like
immobile and it was really starting and he did not
want to live like that, right, Like he and he
remember he turned to me and he goes, if I
get to a place where it's really bad and I
want to go, He's like, you need to be the
one to take care of it. And I was like,
that's not bad, Like you know what I mean. But
he didn't want to be trapped in that body.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Living here in the in the States, he doesn't have
that option, right, he doesn't get to make that decision
when like he's decided that he's had enough and he's
suffering and he's just trapped in a body that can't
serve him. Hmmm. So then to change that here, of
course they should. Yeah. So then like he's sort of
jokingly but sort of not like puts it on me,
like I'm going to trust you to take me out? No,
what my dad?
Speaker 3: Like, dad, No, oh my god. Right, that's intense. I know,
thankfully that didn't. I don't found that way, but I
mean I sort of like understand.
Speaker 1: Yes, I wouldn't want to live that way. I wouldn't
want to be like put on my missile. Yeah, no,
thank you. Yeah, it's hard enough as it is, let
alone in that condition, like I know, yeah.
Speaker 2: And the way that you know, I mean, you know,
human beings were not meant to live as long as
we do, right, I mean, like our bodies give up
after a time, and we've had wonderful medical advances where
we can live a long, high quality level of life
for a long period of time, and that's fantastic. But
like once you're done, like you're done. But like you know,
we just keep people like alive on machines or like
just alive and they don't know where they are, and
they're just like a vegetable and they're just like spoon
feeding them. I mean, like what the what the fuck?
Is that crazy?
Speaker 1: Right?
Speaker 2: You're just like a breathing lump of flesh. Anyways, Welcome
to the porn podcast where we talk about death a lot.
I talk about death a lot on this podcast. It's okay,
it's a part of life. I talk about death a lot.
I don't know why the last few episodes especially, I'm
just very heavy. Sorry. Maybe I should just do a
separate podcast called Holly is Itsess with Death? Would you
watch that? Probably?
Speaker 1: Not.
Speaker 2: I think they might. Yeah, yeah, maybe we should talk
about dicks. I don't know, back to dicks. Should we
get back to to dicks? Okay, we're worried before we
started going up the bed.
Speaker 1: School well no, no, the bet tech thing, and then it
broke Vettech ended up in worn because I've gotten porn
because I want to sleep girls.
Speaker 2: Okay, so let's go. Let's go back to that very
sexy part moment in your life.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I was dating this here's actually how it went. Okay,
so I'm dating this guy. This guy comes on the
animal hospital picks me up.
Speaker 2: Damn it.
Speaker 1: This always happened the worst ones. They win me over
with these fucking pitble puppies.
Speaker 2: Ah, and so he takes me a hit bull, no
pick up gode he tried.
Speaker 1: He came in once before and tried to hit on
me and I shut him down. And then he came
in with the puppies.
Speaker 2: And then he's like, this is what I need. I
need a pit bull puppy and then I can get her.
And then he got me. Oh with my fucking puppy
that he gave away.
Speaker 1: Was I started dating him? Yes?
Speaker 2: Yes, mm hmmm mm hmmm mm hmm. Somebody should start
a service where they just like rent out puppies to
like desperate, lonely men and they can use him to
pick up on chicks. Oh my god, they really should,
They really should, so that everybody.
Speaker 1: We go on our first date, he takes me to
a nude beach. I had never been. I was a
total prude, total prude. We had sex with one person.
Speaker 2: Did you know he was taking you to no beach?
Speaker 1: No, he took me to this place called wreck Beach
in Vancouver, and I'm like, what the fuck. And then
he takes me back to his apartment and he's like,
let me make you a sandwich. I'm like, okay, parents
are there. They live in his apartment.
Speaker 2: You get naked at the beach?
Speaker 1: No, no, he just took you to a nude beech. Yeah.
We sat there, smoked a joint and left.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 1: And then he's like, hey, let's go, I'll make you
lunch and I'm like okay. So he makes me this
like chicken and pickle sandwich.
Speaker 2: Sounds kind of delicious. It was still like a Persian thing.
It was really good. It was that sounds really good.
It was like pickles a lot.
Speaker 1: And his parents are there, and his parents lived with him,
and I'm like, okay, this is cool. And then he's like,
let me show you my ex girlfriend. And I'm like,
who the fuck is your ex girlfriend? And why are
you showing me your ex girlfriend? Oh she's a porn star.
What the fuck her name was? Valerie Shaw? Okay, I
don't know, I like just from way back in the day.
So I was like, huh, interesting, and I got jealous,
Like automatically, I got jealous, and it made me like,
look at the psychology behind us. It made me more
interested in him that he had this chick like, I
don't know, man, psychology is so interesting.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So yeah, he got me, and I was like, hm,
I can be a model too. So I started doing
photo shoots. I ended up I was just doing like
lingerie and swimsuit work. I ended up doing catalogs. This
is back in the what was the website called Model Mayhem?
Speaker 2: Remember that? Oh yeah, I do remember it, and I
believe it still exists really yeah.
Speaker 1: And there was one more. There was Model Mayhem and
another one. I forget what the other one was called.
But I ended up making a whole portfolio. I started
getting modeling jobs. And then a guy named Waldy Martin's
who was a photographer for Playboy. He called and was like,
can I shoot you for Playboy? And I was like, okay,
I'll take my clothes off the fuck and that led
to like, well, then he was like I want to
fuck you and another girl, and I was like, what
not the photographer, your boy No, the boyfriend.
Speaker 2: And he's like yeah.
Speaker 1: I'm like, you just want to do this because you
grew with a porn start before.
Speaker 2: And he's like, well, it's really hot. So I'm like, okay,
let's do it. So we did it.
Speaker 1: And I had the best fucking time in my life
with this other girl. She was beautiful, she was an escort,
so we hire.
Speaker 2: He let me go. He got a professional Yes, I mean.
Speaker 1: He yeah, it's funny.
Speaker 2: We're still friends. It's you and the escort. No, are
you the guy? Are you the guy?
Speaker 1: I make him shoot with me for only fans?
Speaker 2: Okay? I know that pickle sandwich went far. It really
did it really really did.
Speaker 1: So wow, my whole story and now I'm getting lost
pit bull puppy puppy sandwich.
Speaker 2: Yeah, all of that. There you go, guys, there's the
playbook and then.
Speaker 1: We split up and I was like, no, well, I
also I wanted to sleep with more girls, and I would.
Speaker 2: You have any inkling at all that you liked girls
before this, before I did three way with him? No,
I had no idea.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I was like wow, wow, like she was beautiful.
I had a really good time. So then I started
sleeping with other girls, but they weren't like the kind
of girls that I was really attracted to.
Speaker 2: I was just fucking them just to fuck them.
Speaker 1: And what kind of girl are you really attracted to?
Very feminine, very very feminine girls. Okay, and they're just
I was going to this club called Celebrities, was gay bar.
I was trying to find myself. It wasn't working.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it wasn't working. And yeah, so.
Speaker 1: I'm like, okay, well what if I did porn because
I'll get paid and I'll get the hot girls. It's
a win win.
Speaker 2: Wow. So that's what I did. Interesting, Yes, So it
was the women that brought you in.
Speaker 1: It was I initially only came to do girl girl,
and when I sat down with Derek Hay, he said,
you're not good enough to only.
Speaker 2: Do a girl girl. There's no working girl girl money.
Speaker 1: How are you going to afford everything out here? You
have to do boy girl? And I was like, it
sounds like Derek right, yeah, and that was it.
Speaker 2: Derek k. But by the way, Is was the owner
of one of like the top adult industry agencies called
Eli Direct Models. Just for those of you who don't know. Yeah,
so that was it.
Speaker 1: He had me on my first shoot with Vivid with Marcos.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, is zip porn life? Did you ever
see his music video?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 2: Oh girl, but he is just I gotta send it
to you after you've never seen Marco Bunderris's music video
of The Porn Life. Nobody talks about porn life a lot.
Wait what he did a music video called the porn Life.
It's what he's saying. A song. He made a song
and he did a music video called The Porn Life.
I swear to god it's the foot I love you, Marco.
It's the funniest thing.
Speaker 1: So I could totally see him doing something.
Speaker 2: Margot was great, but like he was a solid performer, great,
a great.
Speaker 1: Guy that white smile.
Speaker 2: Love working with him, but really over the top impressions
in pictures. I had to usually be like Margot Kenya
just hide your head behind her or just done it
down a little bit, because all of his expressions were
like they were like the So it was a little
bit much. Oh that's great. I love all these memories.
But Marko and Dere's was he was. He was a solid.
I worked with him a lot. He was good. Oh
my god.
Speaker 1: All the guys in the beginning, so many of them
that just aren't even like Billy Glide and he was
my first Naughty America scene, no second Naughty America sane.
Speaker 2: But anyways, who is still around back then? That was
around back then? Tommy again, Yep, he's still around.
Speaker 1: We were talking about him earlier. Actually, yeah, he's great.
Speaker 2: Who Derek Pearce, Derek Pearce, Yes, Karen Well, Kiaren is mean?
Yes right yeah, kering Lee, he's like herds. He won't
go away. I love you, karens Yes.
Speaker 1: Well.
Speaker 2: Johnny sins is like a legend now, he is literally
a meme, right right, I mean, it's insane. Who else
I don't know?
Speaker 1: Ryan hasn't the Instagram is the state of Ryan.
Speaker 2: Ryan McLain, Yes, okay, around back then too. I don't know.
I feel like he's not.
Speaker 1: But the guys who are on like a heavy rotation
back then they're not around anymore. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean it's like people talk a lot about
how the industry is like hard on women, it's hard
on men, yes, Like it really is because that equipment.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's harder for them too. I feel like because
you know, during the scene, like if a girl is
not being very nice or something, and he still has
to perform, Like we can always perform whether we're mentally
checked in, yeah, whatever, but if he's not, you know,
the whole he like it all lays on him.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I know. It's a lot of pressure. It
is a lot of pressure. Yeah, let's talk rail talk
for a second, guys, because this is something way more
common than you might actually think. Did you know that
over thirty million men in the US experience a rectil dysfunction?
And it's not just an older guy problem, though it
does become more common with age. By the time you're
in your forties, about forty percent of men deal with it.
In your fifties over half, and by sixty nearly seventy percent.
But here's the thing. ED isn't a personal failing. It's
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the podcast and for helping us keep that spark real. Okay,
so I want to get into a little bit more
detail about your first scene of course with Marcolm Manderas.
Do you remember what company it was?
Speaker 1: For Vivid. Okaya, oh right.
Speaker 2: You said that, yes, okay, So tell me, like, walk
me through that day. What was your thoughts walking on set?
Speaker 1: So I showed up and I had my big ass
suitcase and got dropped off by the driver and I.
Speaker 2: Was like, yeah, what the fuck?
Speaker 1: And they're like, okay, pull out your wardrobe and I'm
picking up my wardrobe and he walks in and I
nearly had a heart attack because he's so big. I'm
so little, so short, he's very tall. He's very tall,
very broad shortly, he's a man like whoa and that
white smile and just he was just so big. And
then he got naked and I was like, oh, my
fucking god, are you kidding me?
Speaker 2: I can't do that. Like his dick was so big
that I.
Speaker 1: Had never experienced anything like that before prior to porn.
Speaker 2: I think one two maybe.
Speaker 1: I saw up with three people.
Speaker 2: Oh wow.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I hadn't seen a lot of penises, and
I was very scared. I was super scared. But he
was really nice. Yeah, and he was as gentle as
it could have been, So it went well. I remember
being really sweaty, I remember being very hot, and yeah,
that's pretty much.
Speaker 2: I remember being really sweaty. Was it during the summer. Yeah,
and they probably turned off the air conditioning, probably when
you're running the act, because they never that's the one thing.
All right, we're rolling down, turn off the air and
everyone's like fuck. Yeah, I remember those days. Yeah, I
was worse. Oh my god.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I was very afraid of the penis size.
Speaker 2: And was it painful? Were you able to acclimate after
a while?
Speaker 1: You know, I don't remember exactly, so that tells me
it wasn't that painful, because.
Speaker 2: If it was, you would remember remember. Yeah. So how
did you feel after that? Happy? Good? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Yeah, you felt like, okay, that wasn't as bad. Yeah,
it's like, okay, that's cool, I can do this. I
had no problems having sex in front of people, which
is interesting.
Speaker 2: Yeah, where do you think that is?
Speaker 1: I have no idea.
Speaker 4: Have you always kind of been like an exhibitionist but
not at all interesting? I know there's a whole other side.
There was stuff that I wanted to try, but I
was just too scared. I was too much of a prude.
I was afraid.
Speaker 1: I was afraid I was going to get hurt or
something if I put myself in a bad situation, So
porn was really it was really good for me because
I got to really learn who I am in a
controlled and safe environment where everyone's tested. Like, man, it's
got such a bad rep and it really shouldn't in
my opinion.
Speaker 2: No, I mean, you're literally like the hundredth person I've
heard say those exact things, Like it was a safe
space for me to try out all of these different
things that I wanted to try because I want to
set with a bunch of professional people, like you know,
there's accountability because I'm surrounded by others. I'm working with
professionals like you know, for the most part, if you're
working with reputable companies, yeah, they have your best interests
in mind, and you know, you're able to state your
boundaries before the scene starts, and if something is too
much for you or painful, you can stop things and yeah,
you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you don't have to worry about you know.
Speaker 2: Things been taken too far and you being powerless to
stop it. Yeah. Yeah, Now, looking back, do you think
that there is anything that you would have done differently
knowing what you know now in the beginning of your career.
Speaker 1: Yes, I wouldn't have been so dodgy with whether I
was doing boy girl, girl girl, Like I started with
boy girl, and then I would go on periods where
I was only doing girl girl, and it was always
why was it because of a man?
Speaker 2: Really? Yeah? Who knew?
Speaker 1: So they have cute puppies too. This one had no puppies.
Actually he was just a really good in bed.
Speaker 2: Okay, that was it.
Speaker 1: He won me with the dick, yeah, but he kept me.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I don't know what it was. I was young and
I was.
Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't know.
Speaker 1: My older self looks at my younger self and it's like,
what were you doing?
Speaker 2: But you know what am I going to do?
Speaker 1: Now? Yeah? Yeah, hindsight's twenty twenty. It is so if
I wish I had never met him, because then maybe
I would have stayed just on track and not flipped
and flop and like some directors joke about it, like
are you doing boy girl this month?
Speaker 2: Now? Is there any advice that you would give new
talent looking to start out in the adult industry just
in general, not necessarily like things you wish you'd done differently,
but like now knowing what you know, if someone was
to come to you and say I want to get
into porn, Like, what are some things that you would
tell them that they should really keep in mind or
look out for.
Speaker 1: I would definitely say to stick to the boundaries, to
write the boundaries down and stick to them. Yeah, and
don't break them for money. Don't break them because somebody
makes you feel guilty or I really want you to
do this scene.
Speaker 2: Would be so good to see you do an X,
Y and Z. That's cool. But it lives on the
internet forever.
Speaker 1: That's rights. I've learned that it lives on the internet forever.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, I'm assuming that you've done scenes that you've
probably regretted.
Speaker 1: Yep, Yeah, I sure do. There's a couple out there
that I wish I had not done. Yeah, and what
am I gonna do now? Right?
Speaker 2: Probably not mention what they are on this podcast so
people don't go with them.
Speaker 1: They'll probably already have an idea. Like there were still
good times. It's not that I ever had like bad experience.
I never had a bad experience on set. Oh that's
really good. Yes, I have no bad stories that I
could do.
Speaker 2: You just feel like it just didn't align with your
brand seem that you did Yeah, Yeah, that makes sense.
Speaker 1: I did it more because Robert was like.
Speaker 2: Come on, will you do this please? Yeah? I was like,
fuck Robert at Ellie Direct. Yeah yeah, fine, Now you
I'm assuming are no longer a vet tech at this.
Speaker 1: Point, No, so stop doing that.
Speaker 2: Gotten the porn.
Speaker 1: I stopped working with animals altogether, and then I that
I missed so much, so I started volunteering in a
shelter and that led to me. The short of the
lung is the shelter led to me going to dog
grooming school, which led to me opening up a dog
grooming company. And when I disappeared, that's how I made
my income as a full time dog groomer.
Speaker 2: Oh wow, yeah, I know. So tell me about leaving
the industry, like, why was that? How was that? I
did miss it?
Speaker 1: But I was in love, so I didn't miss it
that much at the time. Yeah, I knew that I
needed to figure something else out because being in the
industry just doing that wasn't filling my emotional cup. It
was filling my financial cup. But I almost felt I
felt like I wouldn't allow myself to be in a
relationship because I was having sex with other people and
I do appreciate monogamy. I myself wouldn't want to be
in whatever the word is for multi people relationship. Okay,
so I'm not I'm not like that now. But I
wasn't trying to go broke or I didn't want to
just be a webcam girl. I didn't want to just
do solos. And whether I'm fucking a girl or a guy,
to me, it doesn't make the same or I mean,
it doesn't make a difference because I'm into both of them.
So yeah, and I didn't want to be like, oh,
I'm gonna go after work and go sleep with somebody
else and you're just gonna chill at home like without
you going to do it.
Speaker 2: No, it didn't. It didn't work for me.
Speaker 1: And yeah, so I kind of phased out of shooting.
And then what happened. I phased out of shooting a
little bit. I was shooting every so often. Oh, and
then I got attacked.
Speaker 2: By a dog.
Speaker 1: That's what happened. Oh, I got mauled by this dog
in the shelter. Yeah, and I was on crutches.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, yeah, oh my god. And I met him.
Speaker 1: I met this guy and he how sorry, can we
just talk about real quick, what like, where did he
where did he attack? He latched on I was wearing
Oh my god, I think I was wearing my ugs
and I was in a dog cage with him, and
he he just he turned. It was transfer aggression. So
he was barking at a dog. I looked at him
and I was like, no, stop barking, and because he
was well, he looked up at me and was like, okay,
let's go. So it's called transfer aggression. It's like when
you see when two dogs are at a window and
they're burb and you see then they start attacking each other,
so it just.
Speaker 2: You know, feeds over.
Speaker 1: So anyways, yeah, he went at me instead and he
grabbed my legs. I had to give him something. Well,
he was nipping out my shirt and then I'm like, okay,
shit's going down. I'm about to get molded by the dog.
So I turned around and grabbed the chain link and
was trying to make my way, but he was lunging,
so I stuck on a leg. I have four pendages
I could offer him.
Speaker 2: And this is is that really what was running through
your mind when you did that? Or was it just
like an instant like you.
Speaker 1: Have to give him something to bite because he was
going up my belly. Yeah you know, you know, because
you know. So I gave him a leg and he
grabbed on and thank god I was wearing my ugs.
Oh my god, because he his teeth were right on
the stitching, and but he ended up ripping through them,
ripped through my jeans. He was trying to kill me.
It was so fucking scary. So I'm holding onto the
chain link trying to get my boots and they're just.
Speaker 2: Fucking climb the chain link.
Speaker 1: But my boots were so fat that I couldn't climb them.
I'm like, fuck, I'm not gonna rip my shoes off
right now.
Speaker 2: There's no way.
Speaker 1: And then I'm screaming. Finally somebody hears me. This is
going on for like a minute that I'm in a.
Speaker 2: Cage with a dog ball my god, getting ball, and.
Speaker 1: She comes in and couldn't get him off me. And
then a kennel attendant finally hurt us because she's like
blowing her whistle. He comes up, throws a bucket of water.
The dog lets go and they're like get out, So
I go and the dog grabs me again, and I
was like, holy fucking They're like, you need to slide
your foot out of the boot.
Speaker 2: Let him have the boot.
Speaker 1: And I was like okay, and I slipped my foot
out and I fucking ran and the dog on the
boot and then spat out the boot and he looked
at me and he charged for me again. So then
I hopped into like one of the small little kennels
and I locked.
Speaker 2: Myself in a dog cage.
Speaker 1: So then he went and started attacking the kennel attendance.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and yeah, I'm assuming he had to be put down,
Yes he did. Yeah.
Speaker 1: I mean if he's gonna go like not even a
bit and release, like bite and release, you might be
able to work through that. Well I don't think got
the shelter, they would work through that. But no, no,
that was a.
Speaker 2: Full on your mind.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so I got taken to the hospital, stitches, blah,
blah blah blah, a na big old scar on it.
A lot of people think I got burned by a
tailpipe of a motorcycle because it's this like huge huge wow.
Yeah wow. So that happened. And at the same time
I met this guy, and at the same time I
was in dog gromming school and I fell magically in
love and that was it.
Speaker 2: But the dog attack did not, like lessen your love
for animals.
Speaker 1: No, it definitely made it harder to work with that
specific color and breed of dog.
Speaker 2: But I forced myself.
Speaker 1: I remember I had this one client come in and
the dog looked identical to the dog, and I know
the ship myself, but I made myself do it. I
pushed myself to get past the anxiety and the fear.
And I know that they can feel your feet, so
it's going to say feel you. Yeah, so yeah, I
did it. Do you know the best way I actually had?
Speaker 2: I had an aggressive dog that was more so problem
with never like try to kill a person, but definitely
tried to kill a couple of other dogs, and I,
you know, would have issues with with her and other dogs.
Do you know what is the best way? Do you
know the best way to like get a dog out
of like a dog attack, Because I've heard like people say,
like you shove your finger up their butt. No, you
I've heard other people say, like water.
Speaker 1: Why your first that would be if you have if
water is accessible, that would be my first thing. But
you go after the aggressor, you take a leash. So
if your dog is getting attacked, you unhook your dog's
leash so that you can let your dog run. You
take your leash and you use it like a slip knot,
and you put it over the other dog's head, the
aggressor's head, and you choke the dog up, you lift
it up.
Speaker 2: Now, what if they're lacked onto your dog and you
can't get it over their head.
Speaker 1: Then you need to go from under and you won't
be able to You won't be able to do the
actual like.
Speaker 2: Oh, I see what you're sailing actually, and that takes
you can do that right because you're not putting it
out of the head.
Speaker 1: Like if you were able to grab the back of
the collar, let's say, and pull the dog up and
you can get it to release for a second, you
could slip it over.
Speaker 2: But if you just have a leash, then.
Speaker 1: Yes you obviously you know, and poist that dog up
and you choke it out. You cut off the stair supply. Okay,
that is how you stop a dog. Okay, there's all this,
picked them up by their back legs. No, it'll hurt
their acl No, you'll fuck it dog up like that
and it would not even guaranteed to work either. Yeah,
the dog would also turn around and come on you
a case of transfer aggression.
Speaker 2: So yeah, you just the neck, so you got to
be able to like lift it up.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: That could be really very hard for a lot of people. Yeaheah.
Speaker 1: Otherwise I don't think there's any real good way.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so water is the first option.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and sometimes even dogs won't let go. Me and
my ex we had these two dogs that, oh, they
got in a fight once and it was twenty seven minutes.
They were fighting for twenty seven minutes. We tried to
separate them, We used water, We choked them out.
Speaker 2: You can't.
Speaker 1: They were big mastives. There there was no there was none.
And then we went to the vet thousands of dollars
later in surgery and they both survived. They just they
gotten a fight over Like I don't know, do.
Speaker 2: They normally get along.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I didn't live with them as as I had
already left him by then. Okay, I was at the
house for some reason. Yeah, he had these two big,
huge mast ups like one hundred and thirty pounds and
one hundred pounds.
Speaker 2: And yeah, they got a lot.
Speaker 1: They were okay, but no, this fight was like, oh
my god, intense man, all right, back to Dick's.
Speaker 2: Sorry. I guess it's just like I talk about Dick
so much. I'm like, I'm always like, of a new
topic comes up, I'm like about that, yeah, And I
just know that like the you know, me as like
a dog lover and a dog owner and somebody who's
had problem dogs, Like, I'm always interested to hear like
the best ways to deal with stuff like that, and
I know that there's a lot of people out there
that have the same questions. Oh yeah, for sure, you know, yeah,
dogfights are scary. Yeah yeah, so you you fell in love,
you left the industry, yep, and when did you come back?
Speaker 1: Twenty twenty is when I started my news social medias.
Speaker 2: Is this like mid pandemic before the pandemic, early pandemic.
Speaker 1: I think mid pandemic, so like the spring or the
summer summertime.
Speaker 2: I think, Okay, then that was mid pandemic for sure.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: I think I remember specifically because I got pregnant right
when the pandemic hit. Okay, I got pregnant and then
like I don't know, a month later, like the world
shut down. So that must have been tough. Actually it
was rad really, yes, it was the best time to
get pregnant, best because I got to spend my entire
pregnancy just like chilling. That's true, I guess too, you know,
Yeah that's known. Yeah, okay, so I'll say this. It
was a mixed bag. So I got pregnant in January.
I didn't find out until February that I was pregnant.
But I remember, like because I remember the day. I
just remember, like the day we had sex and I
had one of those trackers and I remember and I
was like really keeping track, but I remember looking at
my phone and it was like this is a very
high likely day to get pregnant. And I was like huh.
And then I went to APN obviously like didn't know
I was pregnant, and then you know, and then I
found out afterwards. But it was great because yeah, you know,
like I was I'm a photographer and I you know,
I mean, you know, like in the industry, our sets
are like twelve hour days. It was like really really
long days and exhausting, and doing that pregnant would have
been so so I guess you're right. What about the
doctor's appointments though, so the very first doctor appointment that
I went to, the first sonogram that I went to,
my husband couldn't come into and that was like devastating
because it's the first time you get to see your
baby and he couldn't be in there, and like I
was really crushed about that. He was on FaceTime, like
out in the hallway and he could see it, but
that was like shitty. But then after that they he
was allowed to They loosened up it a little bit
and he was allowed to come to the rest of them.
That's good. He was able to be there in the
delivery room. Oh yeah, yeah, yeah. I gave birth in October,
so by then they were okay with it. But before that,
like I know someone who gave Like if you gave
birth early in the pandemic, like around the April, they
wouldn't let you. Yeah, and you had to get COVID tested,
and your partner had to get COVID tested, and your
partner had to wear a mask. And there was a
time earlier than I went in that they would make
you wear a mask. But it was like debatable they weren't.
They hadn't really loosened up the rules yet. Like halfway
through my pregnancy, and I just remember being like, if
you're going to say that my husband can't be in
the delivering room when I give birth, I'm having the
home home birth, Like go fuck yourself, Like I'm not
having a baby, our baby by myself. So but it
ended up being okay and he was there. Good. But
it was also nice because like only he could be there,
which meant that my mother couldn't come crush the birth,
which she very much wanted to do because you know,
she was a midwife fifty years ago and she knows
better than those doctors. I mean, you know my mom,
so you know what she's like. And I was like, sorry, Mom,
the doctor says you can't be there.
Speaker 1: I think it's weird to have a whole bunch of
people and people do that's such an intimate experience. Yeah,
like who why would you? Why would I want a
whole bunch of people in there to see what's going on?
Speaker 2: Dude. I know some like creators who've had like a
film team in there and had like a makeup artist
for like the post baby pictures. I'm not kidding. You've
seen some models who've got their baby afterwards and like
there's no way they didn't get glam right afterwards, they
got like the lashes. They like, look, no one looks
like that after you've given birth.
Speaker 1: Right, Yeah, it's one hell of experience.
Speaker 2: Yeah it's yeah, so joke, yeah so but yeah, so
so it was so honestly, it was great because I
got to just like you got to chill, I get
to chill. I got to chill at home. I get
to like enjoy my pregnancy, you know, my husband and
I get to spend a lot of time together. It
was also really cool too because my brother's wife was
pregnant at the same time. She gave birth to her
first kid four months ahead of me, and we actually
all lived together. Okay, yeah, so they lived in the
guest house behind my house. We had like this little pod.
That's cool. We get to let's be pregnant together and
like nice little community. Yeah. So it was actually, like, honestly,
it was great. Yeah, it was really nice. That's good.
So not bad, but okay, So for you, so it's
so you started your only fans back up now only fans, like,
or did you start it for the first time, because
it wasn't really like a thing back when you were
shooting before right, I don't even think it existed.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah. I came back and I was like,
what the fuck is this thing called OnlyFans? And they're
like what I've got shu?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Wow?
Speaker 1: How what a game changer? I know, like serious game changer.
I put so much power into the hands of the talent. Excellent.
Speaker 2: It changed a lot of the power dynamics in the
industry and pushed a lot of people out of the
industry who liked to abuse the previous power dynamics in
the industry, if you know what I mean. Yes, yeah,
I think only on this great. Yeah, it really leveled
the playing field. Yeah, and I think it's only been
a positive thing. I know, there was like a lot
of producers that initially complained and some that still do that.
You know, like, oh, we lost a lot of like
the big talent because now they're just doing their only
fans and they're not shooting for companies anymore. And I'm
just like, you know.
Speaker 1: What that should speak to you about the experience the
ellent had.
Speaker 2: But also like I feel like I would rather only
work with people who want to be on set. If
you don't want to be on set, if you're only
there because you need to make that paycheck. Then like,
if you can make just enough money at home and
you would rather just shoot like stuff in your bedroom
and you're doing great with that, that's fantastic, right, But
there's still a ton of super successful performers that still
do scenes because they love it. Like Angela White's a
perfect example, you know, like clearly, like she's one of
the most successful creators in the industry. She I'm sure
she does great on Only Fans. Oh yeah, I'm sure
she doesn't need to shoot scenes, but she likes she
likes doing, she likes being on set, she likes the crew,
she likes the production, she enjoys the process, and that
makes it enjoyable for everybody. Yes, you know, yep, I
agree with you. So that must have been like a
really interesting shift for you.
Speaker 1: It was, yeah, learn it even just to begin with,
learning how to use OnlyFans as a whole. When I
look back at my vault now, I'm like, oh, my
fucking god, you uploaded the same thing like fifty.
Speaker 2: Five times because you didn't know that you.
Speaker 1: So, yeah, learning how to use the platform was was interesting.
But yeah, it's made everything different. So for me, I
get to definitely use my voice, Like I'm not shooting
for companies right now, but during the year that I did, Yeah,
I got to speak up. I got to say exactly
who I wanted to work with and X Y and
Z and I appreciate that because it's my body and
I want to want to be there. So I want
to give the best scene. I want to do the
best at what I can do, and I need to
I need a few certain things to go my way
so that I can be that.
Speaker 2: You've said before that you're not as vanilla as you
used to be. What does that mean means?
Speaker 1: I guess I was just such a prude when I
came in and I had these ideas about things.
Speaker 2: I was curious.
Speaker 1: I had judgments, and I had judgments of things I
was curious about, but I was scared of. And yeah,
I've learned, And no, I think I've just evolved. Yeah,
I've changed, I've evolved. I really enjoy femdom Okay, yeah,
I would love to be a dominat trix.
Speaker 2: It was stopping you. I don't know. I'm too busy,
fair enough.
Speaker 1: I would need to learn and I live pretty far
and I don't think, well, I'm sure, there's a dungeon
nearby something.
Speaker 2: So there is a school for dominatrixes. And actually she
came on my podcast, Mistress Domiani Chi. Really yes, and
Rachel Steele took her course and she came on my
podcast and she talked about the course and she said
it was amazing. Really yes, So she runs a school
for dominatrixes that would be out here in La Huh.
I'll send you her info. Okay, Okay, yeah, I like
that stuff. Yeah, I could see I could see you
being good at that.
Speaker 1: It's yes, I like holding that power.
Speaker 2: Now you're back from veterinary school, is that right? Yes? Okay.
Speaker 1: So I finally decided that I'm going to do it
well because my alash girl was like, oh, you can
get your bachelor's online. I was like, wait, what, I
can get my bachelor's online nowadays?
Speaker 2: And she said yes.
Speaker 1: I was like, fuck, sign me up then, because I
can't go to a school. It's not with the grooming
company and the family life and the fucking zoo that
I have at my house in taking care of the house.
Speaker 2: It's just I can't go to.
Speaker 1: School plus pay the bills plus shoot, like I can't
do it all right, So yeah, but now I am
doing it just online and it's a lot.
Speaker 2: Yeah, just as hard as you remembered it would be
back in high school. Yes, yes, yes, it's yeah. I'm
in calculus right now. Oh god, I know that's a
dirty it's really bad. Where are you planning to like
finish your degree, quit adult and become a veterinarian? Is
that like the path? Are you just going to kind.
Speaker 1: Of see I'm just going to see where things go. Okay,
and I want to finish school, but I mean that's
a long process, Like we're talking seven years. So yeah,
and so I'll be here. I'll still do the grooming thing.
Speaker 2: My hope is.
Speaker 1: Once I finish that school. Yes, I want to be
a veterinarian. I want to use my platforms to spread
awareness and goodness and raise money and I want to help.
I want I think that all space and neators should
be free. I think I should be paid for by
the government. I got some plans.
Speaker 2: I disagree with you at all.
Speaker 1: We have a huge animal crisis going on, and the
cost of space and neuters the majority of people can't
afford it. You know, the majority of people aren't making
ten grand a months they're not making you know, like, yeah,
so my friend called me the other day. Actually, the
guy from the bed hospital with the puppy, he got
a new puppy and just so funny that he moved
out here.
Speaker 2: Too interesting, weird.
Speaker 1: He's like, Oh, it's gonna cost me like twelve hundred
dollars so new or my maltee. I'm like, that's that's wild,
Like people can't afford that, and hence why we have
an animal.
Speaker 2: Yeah, price, what's going on? Yeah?
Speaker 1: So yeah, and I would like we'll see, I don't know,
we'll see, We'll see how I look. We'll see, because
you know, that's I'm already forty three. So by the
time I finished school, let's say I'm fifty, and what
if I go downhill really quickly, I don't know.
Speaker 2: You never know how things are gonna go. So I
don't know. I mean, you know, I was like the
number one search term and adult, right is it really?
No shit, that's the biggest niche really, yes, it's sport
to God or were the best all that experience, you
know what I mean?
Speaker 1: Like I'm way better now than I was one hundred
years ago. Way better, Yeah, way better. I mean, I
know my shit now.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I think you're going to be fine. I
think you can stay in as long as you want.
Speaker 1: Yeah. I just want to do what I want to do, right,
and I want to do everything I want to do. Yes,
so that's the plan. I'll probably start Mobile Veterinary Hospital, okay, Yeah,
so that I can go around to people help them
that I can do mobile cat, Earth, cat Neuter and space.
Speaker 2: Mm hmm. I love that. All right, Well, thank you
so much for coming on. I know that we do
actually have some more questions for you from our Patreon members,
which we are going to do in a separate segment.
Is there anything else that you have planned for this
year that people should be looking out for or do
you want to just give them a shout out on
your socials let people know where they should follow you
and they can kind of keep track of what's to come.
Speaker 1: Yes, so everyone can follow me on Instagram, which is
copri Kivani dot ig. My TikTok has more like my
personal day to day okay, data day, bullshit, me complaining
about Calculus that Rikavani dot TikTok. And then my Twitter
is where I promote my scenes. So I suppose that
would be the one.
Speaker 2: Okay, right, or they could just follow you on all
my ex my ex or all of them.
Speaker 1: Yes, that's even better.
Speaker 2: That's my ex, the Kubri Kavanni, the Carikavanni. Yes, okay,
got it. And then of course you're only fans.
Speaker 1: Not only fans which is just Abriakavoni.
Speaker 2: Okay, all right, And then you guys of course can
follow me at Holly Randall on Twitter and on x
Go to Patreon dot com, slash Holly Randall and filter
to get access to these shows streamed live. The bonus
Q and A is like we're about to do now
and so much more. Go to Holly links dot com
for access to all of my platforms. Thank you guys
so much for watching, and I will see you guys
next week