Speaker 1: You know what's in store for you for the next
Speaker 1: half an our ladies and gentlemen.
Speaker 2: Oh you'll never guess.
Speaker 1: Yes, it is the first in a new series of
Speaker 1: adventures with card down Here, John Pertwee, Betty Paul, Roger Snowton,
Speaker 1: the five Smith Brothers Standing Black, and the Orchestra, and
Speaker 1: of course that crazy couple Jimmy Jewel and Ben Worries.
Speaker 1: Since we last heard from our two heroes, they've moved
Speaker 1: into an apartment over a disused fire station, and our
Speaker 1: story begins there. One brisk morning in early autumn, Jimmy
Speaker 1: is cleaning his teeth the.
Speaker 3: World ball rather the wall, right, all right, all right,
Speaker 3: stop garding.
Speaker 2: That'll be quite another that noise, James, Oh, of course
Speaker 2: it will. That's no way. That is no way to
Speaker 2: say hello to the ladies and gentlemen. Of course, not
Speaker 2: if you're going to sing at all. If you're going
Speaker 2: to sing at all, I should sing a little song
Speaker 2: like this, Welcome to you all, ladies and gentlemen. Welcome
Speaker 2: ladies and gentlemen, Sweet day days and gentlemen, sweet ladies, gentlemen,
Speaker 2: who welcome to you all. Well, that's better out than in,
Speaker 2: isn't it. Well, I wish you'd come out of the bathroom, James.
Speaker 2: You know you've been there for hours. Yes, and tell
Speaker 2: me why you're getting all dressed up this morning. Oh,
Speaker 2: I don't like to tell you. Oh god, na Sha,
Speaker 2: go on tell Benny what I know. I know? Oh, yes,
Speaker 2: you will. I guessed it's it's something to do with Betty.
Speaker 4: You're so clever. Then go to the top of the class.
Speaker 4: She's calling around to see her this morning.
Speaker 2: You mean to say you asked a pretty young girl
Speaker 2: like Betty around to this dirty old fire station.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's a birthday on Saturday, and I want to
Speaker 4: find out what she liked for the presents are there?
Speaker 2: Why don't you ask yourself? I can't.
Speaker 4: Then why not you ask her? Oh no, No, every
Speaker 4: time I see Betty I.
Speaker 2: Go all to pieces. You don't.
Speaker 4: I wish I was more the kind of man she admires. Really,
Speaker 4: I wish I would a film's turn. Oh it's not,
Speaker 4: Robert Taylor.
Speaker 2: Oh that's not all been wonderful being a film star, Taylor.
Speaker 2: Don't you realize that one day you're kissing Betty Grable,
Speaker 2: Lana Turner, Dollithan Moore. The next day you're just a
Speaker 2: has been. But brother, just look where you has been?
Speaker 2: Someone at the door, Betty, Betty, I'm going to say, no,
Speaker 2: you're not. I can't stand. I'm gonna catch waking. No, no,
Speaker 2: I'll go on catch me. Oh stop, listen. I wish
Speaker 2: you'd stop laughing about Jimmy. Well out the way they
Speaker 2: go gone on the door?
Speaker 1: Ben?
Speaker 2: Hello, then, oh, good, good morning, Betty.
Speaker 4: Hello, Jimmy, Hello, Betty.
Speaker 2: Won't you come come in? TM?
Speaker 5: Yes you are, and aren't you take.
Speaker 2: A seat, Betty Darling. I think Jimmy wants to ask
Speaker 2: you something.
Speaker 6: Really, Jimmy.
Speaker 4: Yes, you see, Betty, Saturdays your your birthday.
Speaker 2: At such a time, I feel that the time has.
Speaker 4: Come to be the right time for the time.
Speaker 2: What is the time? Ben, ten o'clock?
Speaker 4: Good gracious, No, bets made well? I feel i'd like betches,
Speaker 4: if you don't mind, Oh you.
Speaker 2: Tell me about Oh, don't be silly, you tell her well,
Speaker 2: I just want to.
Speaker 4: Tell you I'd like to give you a little present. Oh, Jimmy, chin, she.
Speaker 2: Called catch me a some knocking about. I don't want
Speaker 2: Betty to know I'm living with an idiot. Why not
Speaker 2: she knows that I'm living with walls shutter.
Speaker 1: Oh it's mensed off.
Speaker 6: He's rid of you, Jimmy, do you want to give
Speaker 6: me a present? But but my cousin Roderick pdge Bellows
Speaker 6: has brought me nearly everything I need.
Speaker 2: Roderick forge Bellows? What that wind bag?
Speaker 6: Oh you mustn't say that, Jimmy. He thinks a lot
Speaker 6: of me and is the most generous.
Speaker 2: Man I know. Yes, but surely there's something Jimmy could
Speaker 2: get for you. Betty.
Speaker 6: Well, that's one little thing, but it's much too expensive
Speaker 6: for Jimmy.
Speaker 2: He name it, just name it, that's all you can
Speaker 2: have it. I'll show Roderick fordge Bellows he's.
Speaker 4: Not the only man who knows how the treet to
Speaker 4: girl very well.
Speaker 6: Then I'd like the ring I've seen in the jewelers
Speaker 6: down the road. It she'll be a Jimmy, I can kiss.
Speaker 2: You for being so sweet.
Speaker 4: Help yourself, lord, Jimmy, where did you.
Speaker 6: Learn to kiss like that?
Speaker 2: Siphoning petrol?
Speaker 6: Well, I'm see him away now. Oh, thank you so
Speaker 6: much for promising to get me the ring.
Speaker 4: Jimmy, nothing, think nothing of nothing.
Speaker 2: But how shall I know which ring it is? Oh?
Speaker 6: You can't miss it in the middle window and a
Speaker 6: little velvet case, mark fifty pounds.
Speaker 2: It's along bench, you're help.
Speaker 6: Goodbye, Jimmy sweet sweet boy.
Speaker 2: Oh she called me a sweet sweet boy.
Speaker 4: Oh, I'm going to get a ring and it's in
Speaker 4: the mid the window, and it's mark fifty pounds.
Speaker 3: It's mark fifty pounds.
Speaker 2: Ben what she said the ring with my mama, Mark
Speaker 2: fifty pounds. So that's what I thought, she said. But
Speaker 2: I haven't got fifty pounds. I'm gonna faint. Do you
Speaker 2: want to be caught? Yes? I think that court already. Well,
Speaker 2: if you don't get the ring for Betty, her cousin
Speaker 2: Roderick will.
Speaker 4: No, I've just got to get that fifty pounds, even
Speaker 4: if it means selling everything I possessed him, that would.
Speaker 2: Still leave you forty eight pounds ten shillings shorts. Hello,
Speaker 2: Maybe that's Betty Beck. Perhaps she left something behind. Foll
Speaker 2: on the door quickly.
Speaker 4: Then she might have called to say she was only
Speaker 4: joking about the ring.
Speaker 2: Okay, what's your mate? Oh well, well, well, well birth
Speaker 2: Defense is seeing you again.
Speaker 4: Yes, where have you been doing all these months?
Speaker 6: Working?
Speaker 5: No? No, no, only MUD's work. I've been doing the
Speaker 5: old currency lock you know aller on Now, no, no,
Speaker 5: that's sort of carrants.
Speaker 2: I mean the old doray me. Well this sounds very interested,
Speaker 2: mister burb. Did you did you do? Well?
Speaker 6: Oh?
Speaker 5: Yes, I say I did you did?
Speaker 2: First of all, I took me thirty.
Speaker 5: Five pounds in English money over to France. Yes, and
Speaker 5: I give me forty thousand French proles.
Speaker 2: Go on then, go on? Yes, and I took me frongs.
Speaker 5: I wur to warrant and I gave me ten thousand
Speaker 5: Dutch guilderies.
Speaker 2: That's good.
Speaker 5: He send took the guildess to Russia. Did you They
Speaker 5: gave me fifty thousand rubles?
Speaker 2: Did they?
Speaker 5: And it's the way only rule pols. You know what
Speaker 5: they gave me when I got back to England?
Speaker 2: Now what six months? Poor old Berby?
Speaker 5: Oh well, never want my mates. I've got a smashing job.
Speaker 5: Now you know I'm a smashing job.
Speaker 2: Now got a smashing job. What is it?
Speaker 5: I'm an agent, an agent, it's an agent?
Speaker 2: What a ten percenter?
Speaker 5: That's it? No? No, no, I'm an agent for the
Speaker 5: elk yourself football pools. I'm just calling around the eyes
Speaker 5: is to cat some new clients. That what I mean?
Speaker 5: How about how about you two boys having a besh.
Speaker 2: Oh no, Burpy, I'll never lucky with football pools.
Speaker 5: Oh yeah, but listen, mates, only last week with one
Speaker 5: of my fear nothing for casts a bloke one fifty thousand,
Speaker 5: fifty thousand pounds, Yes.
Speaker 4: Dear, just think, well I can buy Betty with that man.
Speaker 5: All right, it's all right then someone is here paper.
Speaker 5: It's the jewel, yes, and I'll fill in your coop
Speaker 5: and for you.
Speaker 2: Right o, pass me the paper, Berpy, past me a pen,
Speaker 2: Jimmy it sure, that's fine, that's it.
Speaker 4: Now give me the fifty thousand pounds.
Speaker 5: Well, old mate, old, don't you going to send the
Speaker 5: coopment in first? What do you What do you want
Speaker 5: is your bankers?
Speaker 2: Well i'll take barklers and i'll take the middle and
Speaker 2: i'll be in Scotland before yeah.
Speaker 5: No, no, no, no. When you're doing listen now, when
Speaker 5: you're doing