Speaker 1: Hello, everyone, Welcome to bfytw does Task Master, Episode three hundred.
Speaker 1: I'm the Task Mistress's assistant, Aaron Randolph, and you may
Speaker 1: be wondering what that ridiculous thing is on my head.
Speaker 1: They're called glasses. They help me see. So this is
Speaker 1: the first of a two night event. What you're going
Speaker 1: to see tonight is not the same show you're going
Speaker 1: to see tomorrow, so bear that in mind. Exits are
Speaker 1: that way, bathroom is that way. Please make sure that
Speaker 1: your phones have been set too silent and all the
Speaker 1: appropriate things for being in the theater. Thank you very
Speaker 1: kindly for that. And now the Task Mistress herself, I
Speaker 1: give to you my humble yet extremely wonderful and hopefully
Speaker 1: raise giving boss.
Speaker 2: Welcome to Taskmaster. A wonderfully enjoyable night.
Speaker 3: I cannot wait to see all the ridiculous things that
Speaker 3: these people are up to.
Speaker 2: So let's give it up for our contestants. We have
Speaker 2: got we have got, I forgot the order already, we've
Speaker 2: got together.
Speaker 4: Yeah, all it once once.
Speaker 1: Fair enough as you like it?
Speaker 2: Amazing you ready to start the show. Okay, can we
Speaker 2: talk about this? Can we talk about the wig?
Speaker 5: What?
Speaker 1: People, it's not a wig? I had my hair dyed.
Speaker 2: I know how much work you have put into this,
Speaker 2: preparing all these tasks people flew here. Are you taking
Speaker 2: this seriously? Thank you? Okay, this is an incredibly serious show.
Speaker 2: You ready to get started?
Speaker 1: Yes, mistress, let's start the show. I hate you.
Speaker 6: Doesn't want to let you know.
Speaker 1: I hate you.
Speaker 7: Oh god, Ah, Okay, I'm gonna finish last in this task.
Speaker 8: I fucking know it.
Speaker 5: Bibb, I need an Oscar winning performance here and becomes
Speaker 5: a thing.
Speaker 8: Oopsie, poopsie, that's happened for me.
Speaker 1: Yes, it's our podcast three hundredth episode, and we thought
Speaker 1: how better to celebrated than to play task Master with
Speaker 1: people who have had a profound impact on our show
Speaker 1: and Jen Reagan Oggie stepped in on our show when
Speaker 1: Jorge passed away. Caroline changed my whole life for the
Speaker 1: better and is one of our favorite guests. Dave improved
Speaker 1: our audio quality by leaps and bounds. Matt and Audra
Speaker 1: produced our sister show, The Gate Leapers, and constantly work
Speaker 1: with us. Cool Do Cool Stuff.
Speaker 2: Was on once I was on the show.
Speaker 1: Little Scamp.
Speaker 2: Amazing. For those who don't know the premise of task Master,
Speaker 2: my loyal assistant here has prepared a series of silly
Speaker 2: and creative challenges for our contestants. They have completed these talents,
Speaker 2: these challenges in absolute isolation. They have an idea of
Speaker 2: how they have done, but they have no idea how
Speaker 2: anybody else on the panel has done in these challenges.
Speaker 2: Not anybody knows, not even our sound engineer Stevie. Not
Speaker 2: even Stevie knows how they have done. And we are
Speaker 2: going to see that.
Speaker 1: Yes, I'm the only person who knows what's coming. Based
Speaker 1: on their skill and or the task Masters's swift and
Speaker 1: terrible judgment, the contestants will be awarded one to five
Speaker 1: points per TSK.
Speaker 2: Contestant with the most points will win each night's selection
Speaker 2: of prizes, but the contestant with the highest score after
Speaker 2: both nights will win our beautiful Jorge Memorial Taskmaster Trophy,
Speaker 2: this glorious gold painted microphone. Who is the highest honor
Speaker 2: by man, God or country. Speaking of prizes, that's our
Speaker 2: first task, isn't it.
Speaker 1: The first task of every task Master show is the
Speaker 1: prize task. Our contestants have each brought in a prize
Speaker 1: for the prize hall, and since this is our first episode,
Speaker 1: we figured we do a prize task that would introduce them,
Speaker 1: so to speak, isn't that right, Mommy new choice?
Speaker 9: A new choice, anti, new choice, niece, new choice, Daddy.
Speaker 4: Let's go with daddy.
Speaker 1: Thank you daddy. So, as we wanted this to be
Speaker 1: an introductory task, we asked each of them to bring
Speaker 1: in the thing that most matches who they are if
Speaker 1: it weren't for one thing wrong with it. The player
Speaker 1: who brought in the best prize that almost represents them
Speaker 1: will get five points, and the player with the most
Speaker 1: points at the end of tonight's show will go home
Speaker 1: with prices that will mostly remind them of their fellow contestants.
Speaker 2: Incredible, I want to see these. Let's let's do this
Speaker 2: first one in this same order. So we'll start with Aggie, sir,
Speaker 2: what is the prize that you have brought that most
Speaker 2: describes you minus one thing?
Speaker 10: Oh well, the prize that I brought was a old
Speaker 10: nautical compass. Oh yeah, that's the one right there. Yeah,
Speaker 10: so it's an old leather bomb compass. On the side,
Speaker 10: there's like words of wisdom written on the bottom. It
Speaker 10: has like a nice scientific explanation of how a compass works.
Speaker 11: And yeah, as you can see it's quite quite old.
Speaker 11: But there's a.
Speaker 2: Problem with it.
Speaker 1: It's fucked. It doesn't work. I try. How is that
Speaker 1: different from you?
Speaker 11: No good point, But you know, I think I'm a
Speaker 11: pretty good navigator.
Speaker 10: I haven't gotten lost yet, but yeah, I wouldn't bring
Speaker 10: that on a camping trip.
Speaker 11: Unless you plan on getting lost like quickly.
Speaker 2: Sometimes I do want to get lost. We'll find out now, Caroline,
Speaker 2: what have you brought for the prize pot today? Yes, hello, everybody.
Speaker 5: I brought a little figurine of the Scarlet Witch that
Speaker 5: is modeled after after Elizabeth Olsen. So so many things
Speaker 5: to discuss. I have red hair, so basically twins.
Speaker 2: The other fun.
Speaker 5: Thing that I just am honored to have gotten to
Speaker 5: do is my very first big voiceover role. I got
Speaker 5: to play the Scarlet Witch in a Marvel project, which
Speaker 5: was so.
Speaker 2: Literally cried on the zoom call. I was like, okay, Dad,
Speaker 2: oh my god. But here's the thing that's wrong with it.
Speaker 2: Look at me.
Speaker 5: I'm not Elizabeth Olson, but that is look at her,
Speaker 5: that's Elizabeth Olson. So it would be fucking perfect if
Speaker 5: it wasn't Elizabeth Olson. Just kidding.
Speaker 2: She's a great Scarlet Witch.
Speaker 5: But it's yeah, that's what's wrong with it.
Speaker 2: This this is a contender. I'm loving that. Let's take
Speaker 2: a look at Dave's prize.
Speaker 12: Hi, I'm Dave, and like Caroline, I worked professionally in voiceover,
Speaker 12: and so my prize that I brought is an app
Speaker 12: g one audio interface. I feel this, this represents I
Speaker 12: pride myself on doing like on my technical expertise, and
Speaker 12: so this is a high end device, so the very
Speaker 12: very best audio quality recording. And the thing that's wrong
Speaker 12: with it is that it is like me. It is
Speaker 12: broken inside in a way that I'm still figuring out.
Speaker 12: But also like me, I bought it that way. I
Speaker 12: bought it used not testing and not having tested it
Speaker 12: out first, because I have a tendency to just dive
Speaker 12: in and not consider the consequence.
Speaker 1: So like me in so many ways.
Speaker 2: Incredible, incredible, And thank you for explaining kind of the
Speaker 2: what it is, because I'm someone who definitely does audio
Speaker 2: things and definitely knew what that was before. So thank you.
Speaker 12: You have the look I can tell, Yes, Jen.
Speaker 2: What have you brought in today? Yes? So I am
Speaker 2: a fiber artist.
Speaker 13: I made this so I figured, you know, let's bring
Speaker 13: a little bit I craft into it.
Speaker 2: So I made this bean or two, depending on what
Speaker 2: part of the world you're from. This is made with
Speaker 2: your from the independent yarn dire that I worked for,
Speaker 2: so I got to pick it out when I was
Speaker 2: at work.
Speaker 13: It's very autumnal. It's got oranges and greens, which is
Speaker 13: my color palette. But there is one thing wrong with it,
Speaker 13: and it's made impeccably.
Speaker 2: However, if we go to the next picture, sports propaganda.
Speaker 2: My partner, what is one thing that's not mean? He
Speaker 2: just goes sports. Yeah, you're right, so knit it onto.
Speaker 2: This is football and somehow, as he said, I still
Speaker 2: made a cute football at disgraceful to myself.
Speaker 13: And to prove that this is all one hat. It
Speaker 13: is reversible. It's two different hats.
Speaker 2: So you can you can hide your shame like I would,
Speaker 2: or take it to sports or something else. Oh I
Speaker 2: hope that whoever wins it takes it to a sport.
Speaker 2: This is a real contender because it is so you,
Speaker 2: except for that one piece, fundamentally not you. I'm loving this.
Speaker 2: These are great, Matt. What have you got for us?
Speaker 1: I've brought in a bottle of Matt white paint.
Speaker 7: Okay, okay, it's it's got an E on it, and
Speaker 7: I don't. I am the other things listed on the bottle,
Speaker 7: I am those things got it.
Speaker 1: I love words.
Speaker 2: Wow, it's almost like they're married.
Speaker 1: An advantage. I think.
Speaker 4: I wouldn't be.
Speaker 2: So sure because there is a lot of things going
Speaker 2: on here, like Caroline's career, Jen knit a whole hack.
Speaker 2: You did just buy a bottle of white paint that
Speaker 2: I cannot be sure was not already in my craft club.
Speaker 1: It may have been your bottle of white.
Speaker 2: As much as I love the wordplay, how would you
Speaker 2: like to score? This is so phenomenal I am for
Speaker 2: the effort that was put in. I'm going to give
Speaker 2: Gen five points. I am going to give Caroline four
Speaker 2: points who and here I'm going to give Dave three
Speaker 2: whoa and I'm going to give This is tough because
Speaker 2: I do like the wordplay, but as you, as Aggie's
Speaker 2: friend pointed out, there might not be as much difference
Speaker 2: between the compass and the person in for your joke
Speaker 2: of it. So I am going to have to go
Speaker 2: with ma to Oggie.
Speaker 1: One okay and starts off with five big points. All right,
Speaker 1: are you ready for our first pre recorded task?
Speaker 2: I am so ready.
Speaker 1: Our first task is a lot like a dream that
Speaker 1: I enjoy having, and that our contestants are about to
Speaker 1: spend a few minutes with a German stranger.
Speaker 8: Hello, how are you good?
Speaker 1: There?
Speaker 14: She is.
Speaker 1: Hell? Hi, Hi Caroline, This is my friend pyne Ja.
Speaker 4: Hello, cal Nice to meet you.
Speaker 1: Uh, Matt, this is a param jade or pirene.
Speaker 4: Piran or piren.
Speaker 2: I prefer pirate because I like pie more than p.
Speaker 1: All Right, Dave, here's your first task. Would you mind
Speaker 1: reading it out loud for me?
Speaker 15: Wait?
Speaker 16: Are we rolling?
Speaker 17: Uh?
Speaker 18: Yeah, we're rolling right now, Doddy, Caroline, here is your
Speaker 18: first There is your first task. Go ahead and read
Speaker 18: it out loud for me.
Speaker 19: All right, Learn as much as you can about this
Speaker 19: German person.
Speaker 7: Okay, learn as much as you can about this German person.
Speaker 7: She understands English. Hello, she understands.
Speaker 20: She understands English. But we'll only respond to you in German.
Speaker 4: You have five minutes.
Speaker 1: Your time starts now.
Speaker 21: Okay, okay, okay.
Speaker 1: Question one?
Speaker 21: What was her first peten?
Speaker 7: Oh Man, I did French in school and not German,
Speaker 7: so this is already off to a great start.
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry, Oh my gosh. Obviously this task would
Speaker 1: be dead simple if anybody understood German. But I'll spoil
Speaker 1: it right now. Nobody did.
Speaker 2: So this is a panel of incredibly talented, creative lateral thinkers,
Speaker 2: and I am sure we are going to see a
Speaker 2: lot of varied approaches. And we're not just gonna like
Speaker 2: ask a bunch of questions in rapid succession, right.
Speaker 1: Sure, that would be stupid. Anyway, here are the boys, David.
Speaker 21: Matt Yeah, yeah, okay, close enough.
Speaker 22: Happen?
Speaker 21: I mean that sounds like two words to me, But
Speaker 21: like so often, Germany is like, oh oh, I'm getting.
Speaker 1: Confirmation two words.
Speaker 16: Oh my gosh, you shouldn't have happened.
Speaker 21: Well, then I'm trying to think of pets that are
Speaker 21: two words, like guinea pig or house cat.
Speaker 1: I mean the house cat.
Speaker 15: I'm really reaching for it.
Speaker 8: Now, did you say that again?
Speaker 2: Mongoolish?
Speaker 1: Tren Hatton?
Speaker 19: All right, interesting, See I talk French in college. So
Speaker 19: I screwed up early on.
Speaker 1: I should have learned instead.
Speaker 7: Nine it Well, it can't be a Mongolian hen that
Speaker 7: can't be. That can't be the right thing. What sound
Speaker 7: does did your first pet make? Was it a bird?
Speaker 2: Nine?
Speaker 15: Is it?
Speaker 1: Was it a cat?
Speaker 22: Nine?
Speaker 8: Some height of small chicken. That's a bud.
Speaker 7: I'm going to move on through the questions and then
Speaker 7: we'll see if any coming up as like a yes.
Speaker 7: This is making some kind of linguistic connection. What's your
Speaker 7: favorite flower?
Speaker 4: I guess, Minie, I guess, mine, I guess.
Speaker 7: I don't.
Speaker 8: I genuinely don't know.
Speaker 1: Your favorite flower?
Speaker 4: Uh, sunflower?
Speaker 15: Is it an orchid?
Speaker 1: Nine?
Speaker 15: Is it a daffodil?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 15: Is it a ficus? That's a plant.
Speaker 8: Flower, daffodil?
Speaker 1: Nine? Rose?
Speaker 8: N lily?
Speaker 1: N Oh.
Speaker 8: Now I've run out of flowers.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm going to come.
Speaker 21: Back to that and give myself a chance to think
Speaker 21: of some more flowers, and I'm gonna.
Speaker 1: Hit up question three.
Speaker 15: What did she study in college? Heis listen, shaft.
Speaker 1: Highbus and shaft, yeah, yeah, yeah, shoft.
Speaker 8: Oh my goodness.
Speaker 7: I wish I was asking you more normal questions so
Speaker 7: that I didn't seem like such a dick asking you this.
Speaker 15: Accounting.
Speaker 23: I'm guessing no, yeah, okay, hi, high subfuse shaft.
Speaker 21: Well, that's clearly got to be the study of walking
Speaker 21: sticks nine nine. Wow, Okay, I don't know how I'm
Speaker 21: blowing this this badly and shoft listen shift.
Speaker 1: Like shot.
Speaker 21: Oh oh, it's it's a different kind of vision shaft
Speaker 21: I should have.
Speaker 8: What's your hidden talent?
Speaker 15: I am not fun.
Speaker 8: You can you can run very far, you can sing.
Speaker 21: Honestly, Yeah, I means one yeah yeah yeah. So so
Speaker 21: your hidden talent is is one one good time, one
Speaker 21: night only.
Speaker 1: One singular sensation step she takes.
Speaker 21: You're a musical theater major.
Speaker 7: What was the loudest gift you received as a child.
Speaker 1: As far and slipper?
Speaker 2: Fliper?
Speaker 7: Okay, okay, so like maybe like a loud a loud
Speaker 7: pair of shoes.
Speaker 17: Horn, like a trumpet, clipper, flipper, slipper, Yeah yeah, flipper,
Speaker 17: I'm flipper one one dolphin.
Speaker 1: The anomous flipper high speed about high slipper? What is loud?
Speaker 1: That goes high speed? Flipper that goes high speed.
Speaker 6: Like a fan a that circulates air.
Speaker 1: Those can be loud.
Speaker 7: For those watching in the theater. This is the first
Speaker 7: task of the day. Is eight in the morning, three.
Speaker 1: Minutes because it's five minutes.
Speaker 14: Yeah, that'd be why I'm not good at math either,
Speaker 14: not good at other languages.
Speaker 1: Is math and your time is up? Well, thank you
Speaker 1: very much.
Speaker 16: It's a pleasure.
Speaker 7: I like a true British person, I have let you
Speaker 7: rip down.
Speaker 2: I do have to check. Are you still friends with
Speaker 2: this woman?
Speaker 1: Yes? Yes, she's a good friend of mine. She's actually
Speaker 1: an old boss. She is the stream team leader for
Speaker 1: gog dot com.
Speaker 2: Incredible, wonderful, and no one figured out anything about her.
Speaker 1: Well, I mean, Matt said Mongolian.
Speaker 2: I do have note of that. So this does get
Speaker 2: us a little bit of somewhere. David, do have the
Speaker 2: question what this and shoft were you thinking?
Speaker 1: I mean it could have been one of many visit shops.
Speaker 12: Right there was a Heiser Visions vision shop, so like,
Speaker 12: how do I know which vision shops it is?
Speaker 24: I'm pronunciation is so good, yours, like, you know what
Speaker 24: it's because I one time sang like a German opera
Speaker 24: I think, like in high school.
Speaker 12: And because of that, I thought I was going to
Speaker 12: do so good at this.
Speaker 1: It's such confidence. I did French operas. I just didn't
Speaker 1: know Germany.
Speaker 2: I did love that both of you did study French
Speaker 2: and it was zero help to you.
Speaker 1: We know, help I remember French. Either. Languages are a
Speaker 1: waste of time.
Speaker 2: Amazing interesting. I loved Day's ability to properly mimic back,
Speaker 2: what was saying, your voice acting work coming in incredibly Well,
Speaker 2: Matt knows very few flowers like four and that's it.
Speaker 1: He tapped out.
Speaker 2: And the first thing I wrote down was just Aggie
Speaker 2: going interesting, and she said the flipper, the flipper, and
Speaker 2: the audience made a collective sound of oh, as though
Speaker 2: you knew what the fuck she was saying. They're gonna
Speaker 2: get shipped, but you're gonna get shipped for that incredible
Speaker 2: I've got notes, I've got some ideas on ranking here.
Speaker 1: So yeah, so it wasn't incredibly obvious. None of them
Speaker 1: got a single one right, But like I said, Matt said, Mongolian,
Speaker 1: I'll leave it up to you. In the meanwhile, let's
Speaker 1: see how Caroline Engender.
Speaker 2: Phenominal.
Speaker 4: All right, hello friend, how are you? It's so nice
Speaker 4: to meet you.
Speaker 5: Hi.
Speaker 22: I'm just gonna do my own thing. I five minutes.
Speaker 20: Could you describe with your hands how you interact with
Speaker 20: your favorite pet?
Speaker 22: It's all very.
Speaker 2: Sweet, So can you show me with your.
Speaker 5: Hands, like what shape of ears your first pet had?
Speaker 4: Okay, I'm gonna go with cat.
Speaker 1: Dog, dog.
Speaker 2: Kindd Is this like a typical household pet?
Speaker 25: Nine?
Speaker 4: Okay, okay, I think it was.
Speaker 2: A rats or a guinea pig.
Speaker 4: Rabbit?
Speaker 2: Nine nine nine?
Speaker 4: Okay? Does it have hooks? Is it a mammal? Does
Speaker 4: it eat meat? Does it have two like buck teeth
Speaker 4: in the front? Some kind of rodent mouse?
Speaker 2: Yes? Oh?
Speaker 4: Sweet? Sort of rat?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Similar mouse is close?
Speaker 2: Yeah. Gurbil?
Speaker 26: Oh my god?
Speaker 4: Is it bigger or smaller?
Speaker 5: Specific it's oh gosh, there are kinds of gerbils.
Speaker 2: It gets my nake.
Speaker 4: Grows in the garden. Yeah, okay.
Speaker 5: Does it look like it has a face on it like.
Speaker 4: Pansies kind of have like a face.
Speaker 1: I don't know.
Speaker 4: No, no, okay, could.
Speaker 22: You again mine with your hands?
Speaker 20: How your favorite flower blooms very.
Speaker 22: Very small bloom?
Speaker 20: Yeah?
Speaker 22: I guess small like daisy?
Speaker 2: Nor not?
Speaker 1: Line up?
Speaker 22: This is just testing my knowledge of flower.
Speaker 4: What is its color?
Speaker 2: Usually blown?
Speaker 4: Bloue blue?
Speaker 2: Yeah?
Speaker 1: Who let?
Speaker 4: Okay? Okay? What are blue flowers high ranges? No, definitely
Speaker 4: not that bluebells? Okay. I don't really know flowers very well.
Speaker 5: So I'm gonna move on to question three, which is, uh,
Speaker 5: what did you study in college? He hates this and chuffed, great, Okay,
Speaker 5: so it's nice.
Speaker 20: Was it something to do with like writing commutations, literature, Yeah,
Speaker 20: and vits.
Speaker 2: Enough there, I'm gonna.
Speaker 22: Say, uh maybe history.
Speaker 4: Is this a pretty common major?
Speaker 24: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Yeah, okay? Business? Nice communication?
Speaker 1: Nine?
Speaker 4: Where did you go to school?
Speaker 2: The minds to does?
Speaker 1: Okay?
Speaker 2: Okay? Nice?
Speaker 4: What is your hidden talent?
Speaker 20: I'm not fam if your hidden talent has any uh
Speaker 20: hand gestures or physicality?
Speaker 22: Would you be able to do that with? How you
Speaker 22: describe your hidden talent? Hidden talent?
Speaker 20: Dancing?
Speaker 27: Oh no, okay, okay, So now I'm gonna move on
Speaker 27: to question or.
Speaker 20: And what was the loudest gift you received as a child?
Speaker 1: Slipper? High speed flipper.
Speaker 22: Like a high speed car, like a car of some kind.
Speaker 20: I'm dancing dancing around guy, amazing.
Speaker 1: That was an attempt for sure.
Speaker 2: So there's a specific face that Caroline made.
Speaker 1: Oh, I mean when she learned there are different kinds
Speaker 1: of Gerbils.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, yeah, you knew the face. I think I
Speaker 2: think Caroline was all of us. Oh god, there's so
Speaker 2: many types of Gerbils. This is phenomenal. Caroline and Jen
Speaker 2: did go more lateral approach involving physicality. Caroline got that
Speaker 2: it was a gerbil, which is technically anybody else love it? Oh,
Speaker 2: this is phenomenal. Is there anything I want to make
Speaker 2: you defend in this public manner? Flower flowers with faces?
Speaker 5: Okay, this is about to get like very wholesome for
Speaker 5: this environment. But my grandmother had a flower garden and
Speaker 5: her favorites were pansies because pansies have their little face.
Speaker 2: They have a little faces, and I feel like people
Speaker 2: who know flowers know about the little faces calling me
Speaker 2: out for not No, I do appreciate your knowledge, and
Speaker 2: you did get the most, so I have to give
Speaker 2: you five points.
Speaker 5: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Matt got Mongolian, and so I do have to give
Speaker 2: him four.
Speaker 28: Yeah.
Speaker 5: Together we have one whole answer.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah.
Speaker 2: Now we get into some some gray areas from those
Speaker 2: who didn't necessarily get as many, and by as many,
Speaker 2: I mean many. I'm gonna go for three points. I
Speaker 2: shouldn't do this, but I'm going to do. Jen and Dave,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna give three points each. I loved your later
Speaker 2: you continued the gestures. I had one bit and it
Speaker 2: was can you be physical on the zoom call? Can
Speaker 2: you get up and dance for me? I loved the
Speaker 2: accurate representation of the words because I can hear someone
Speaker 2: speak to me in an English sentence and not be
Speaker 2: able to say it back to them. So that's gonna
Speaker 2: also get the three points. And Aggie, can you get
Speaker 2: two points? And I think that's fair.
Speaker 29: Amazing, amazing, that gets four points.
Speaker 1: I've bucked out that massively. Would you like the current
Speaker 1: score breakdown? I would love to think. I'm still waiting
Speaker 1: to get my.
Speaker 2: Power points breakdown.
Speaker 1: Okay, so currently out in the lead is Caroline with
Speaker 1: nine points, by Jen with eight, Dave and Matter tied
Speaker 1: on six and all he's sitting pretty at three. I
Speaker 1: would love to Okay, our next few recorded task, this
Speaker 1: is for real bargain hunters. Let's move on to your
Speaker 1: next task. This one's going to be a little bit easier.
Speaker 18: Okay, Uh, this time I'll just say uh, it's you know,
Speaker 18: something like it's uh. And now for your next task,
Speaker 18: go ahead and start reading.
Speaker 1: No more fingers.
Speaker 30: Stuff that's just weird.
Speaker 1: No more fingering, no more fingering. Okay, Dave, your next
Speaker 1: task is ready for you. Go ahead and read it
Speaker 1: out loud for me. Okay, here we go.
Speaker 21: Get the most interesting item on Craigslist for free.
Speaker 19: You have until the live shows in five months. That's fair.
Speaker 20: You must provide screenshots of the original listing and.
Speaker 31: Any correspondence between yourself and the lister.
Speaker 7: Or you will be disqualified your time stoughts. Now, all right,
Speaker 7: I guess I got five months.
Speaker 22: My first thought must have just like a cat, like.
Speaker 8: An actual like.
Speaker 15: An entertainment center for free.
Speaker 8: I don't even know how.
Speaker 1: A zebo.
Speaker 19: Oh oh, that's not far from here.
Speaker 4: Well, okay, First of all, interesting is such a subjective term.
Speaker 31: So I think I'm gonna go on on Craigslist and
Speaker 31: find something because I think that is going to be
Speaker 31: the most interesting is I'm going in with no idea
Speaker 31: what I'm looking for, truthfully, But.
Speaker 7: I think what I find interesting isn't necessarily the same
Speaker 7: as what everyone finds interesting. So I've got to make
Speaker 7: it broadly interesting. I'm to look for a broadly interesting thing.
Speaker 21: Okay, Okay, I think I'm probably looking for something that
Speaker 21: will be the most absolutely impractical and useless in my
Speaker 21: everyday life, something that uh oh, maybe a little embarrassing
Speaker 21: that someone would want to pursue. Of course, then if
Speaker 21: you're putting it on Craigslist giving it away for free,
Speaker 21: how embarrassing.
Speaker 1: Could it be? How embarrassing indeed.
Speaker 2: Okay, so everyone has found a thing on Craigslist for free.
Speaker 2: Let's see these interesting items. Let's start with Carolyn. Is
Speaker 2: it because we've been hyping.
Speaker 1: It up all week?
Speaker 4: Sarah?
Speaker 2: Okay, HAPs do I pull it out? Oh my god,
Speaker 2: oh god.
Speaker 5: This was my wife, Sarah's carry on item on our
Speaker 5: plane from Philadelphia. This, my friends, is the canjo all right,
Speaker 5: And as a little demonstration, and Sarah has made has
Speaker 5: developed a very intimate relationship with the candle.
Speaker 1: They have traveled far and wide together.
Speaker 2: Oh my gosh. I am surprised and delighted by this.
Speaker 2: And I'm surprised, and I did buy your musical interlude
Speaker 2: A Joy, A Joy from top to bottom. Let's now,
Speaker 2: let's see Dave's Craigslist acquisition.
Speaker 1: Well, first, we're gonna start with the correspondence.
Speaker 2: Oh yes, the proof to me.
Speaker 1: So, David, if you'd explain what it is you picked up.
Speaker 12: I acquired a set of cardboard standis featured in the
Speaker 12: lobby of a movie theater upon the theatrical release of
Speaker 12: the movie Bay.
Speaker 1: That's great. Well, the reason I wanted this to go
Speaker 1: first is because the lady who sent it to you
Speaker 1: said it was the only thing they found in the
Speaker 1: finished basement of the house they bought. I'm like, did you.
Speaker 12: Buy George Miller's house? You said they were the original
Speaker 12: owners and they were left there.
Speaker 1: That's great bas knowledge. By the way, just knowing that joke,
Speaker 1: that's fantastic. That's the one thing you know about it.
Speaker 2: Incredible.
Speaker 1: Here is a Dave returning home with said, standish, God,
Speaker 1: here's a lot of in their full glory.
Speaker 4: Oh.
Speaker 2: The fact that there's a photo shoot attached. I know
Speaker 2: you kept those they're.
Speaker 25: Still in.
Speaker 1: Was like, why are we greeted by the cast of.
Speaker 2: Where's her sense of whimsay?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 4: This is so beautiful.
Speaker 2: I looked down at my notes and then I looked
Speaker 2: back up about it, and it was just so wonderful.
Speaker 2: Oh a joy, this this is so exciting. Let's see
Speaker 2: what Jen has for us to add to this beautiful
Speaker 2: collage so far.
Speaker 13: So in my perusal, I picked Facebook Marketplace as my
Speaker 13: uh free online marketplace service that we licensed to do either.
Speaker 1: They were allowed to use any online marketplace as long
Speaker 1: as they could prove it was gotten for free.
Speaker 2: Yes, cool, cool, cool. So I drop about Aurora and
Speaker 2: picked up these bases full of sand that were used
Speaker 2: in someone's actual wedding as unity sand. If you picture
Speaker 2: two people pouring sand into a jar. From all accounts,
Speaker 2: they look to still be married. They didn't want to.
Speaker 2: I was like, why why were not more? Iification ceremony anymore?
Speaker 1: Is it?
Speaker 2: Do we not like the colors? Are we not vibing
Speaker 2: with the decor? Its just a precursor to a rocky divorce?
Speaker 32: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Like is she like, I'm here and this is from
Speaker 2: a man that She's like, I don't want this sand anymore?
Speaker 2: Also turquoise and brown, which dates the wedding. Yes, so
Speaker 2: they're having like circa two six eight.
Speaker 13: Yeah, and it's proper hated blue and brown back turquoise
Speaker 13: and brown specific era. And because they were in glass
Speaker 13: and I couldn't bring them from home, I brought the
Speaker 13: sand in the back. Yes, I had someone's potentially rocky marriage.
Speaker 2: Oh my god, a loose bag of powder has been brought.
Speaker 2: That's my addition to this wonderful It's just sand. It's
Speaker 2: pretty decent sand. Cute, but yeah, high quality sand. Yeah,
Speaker 2: it's very intimate and personal. You just have it. Let's
Speaker 2: see Augie's next.
Speaker 30: Okay, all right, So what I found on Craiglist.
Speaker 11: After much search I mean procrastination, I mean search, I.
Speaker 30: Found a nice little pe tray, a cactus ice tray
Speaker 30: where your cubes are cactuses, but the tray is also as.
Speaker 2: The double cactus element. I will say, does something for me.
Speaker 2: I am excited about the double cactus situation.
Speaker 1: I did have one question. Now I saw the correspondence,
Speaker 1: and if you read toward the bottom, there's a bunch
Speaker 1: of other items that she was giving away, including something
Speaker 1: that starts three D horse pillar.
Speaker 11: GV fair That was originally what I was going for.
Speaker 11: Apparently she gets cleared out on a daily basis, because
Speaker 11: it was really hard just to get this.
Speaker 1: It took three.
Speaker 30: Days and like an hour long back and forth text
Speaker 30: message Sash to even get this.
Speaker 11: I don't know what she was doing, clearing house or
Speaker 11: trying to hide stuff from her husband, who she specifically
Speaker 11: told me when I arrived to be as quiet as
Speaker 11: a mouse.
Speaker 29: So it's oh my god, it was her husband's favorite cactus.
Speaker 11: Try to come to Colorado to get it?
Speaker 1: So all right, okay.
Speaker 2: Now let's see that.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 7: I also use Facebook marketplace as well, and you find
Speaker 7: some pretty incredible things on that people are giving some
Speaker 7: incredible things away for free, and i'd go.
Speaker 1: A brand new PlayStation poltal?
Speaker 7: What what retail value of two hundred dollars for free?
Speaker 1: Task Mistress. Before you judge any of these, you should
Speaker 1: know they were all required to submit their correspondence to me,
Speaker 1: and out of everyone's Matt's correspondence seemed a little fishy.
Speaker 1: Now this seems like a golden opportunity. We have two
Speaker 1: talented and professional voice actors in Carolina Day. Can you
Speaker 1: guys act out this correspondent? Would you mind coming over
Speaker 1: here and if you give them your if we bust
Speaker 1: on stage, just just my position where you can read
Speaker 1: the words. Caroline, you'll read for Matt so British and arrogant.
Speaker 1: You read the Blue bubbles, and Dave you're going to
Speaker 1: read for the cellar and I want you him to
Speaker 1: be read like a mix of Gargamel from the Smurfs
Speaker 1: and that old man in the horror movie that tries
Speaker 1: to warn the kids from going into the haunted house. Okay,
Speaker 1: you read the gray Bubbles. Ready?
Speaker 5: Hey do you still have the free PlayStation portal?
Speaker 4: Very interested? If so?
Speaker 12: Yeah, my great grandfather.
Speaker 1: I'm a little sentiment. I'm not sure if you're wthy.
Speaker 2: Correction, that's totally fair. I promise to take good care
Speaker 2: of it. I have over four platinum trophies.
Speaker 12: If that makes me worthy depends on the gate.
Speaker 2: The three Spiral of the Dragon games and gt A V.
Speaker 1: Hell granted, you are powerful?
Speaker 2: Okay? Oh okay?
Speaker 1: What shage on your head?
Speaker 2: I was the high school baseball team's catcher.
Speaker 4: Which I think says enough.
Speaker 1: First needed to be sure? Is a handheld device?
Speaker 2: You know your family lives well.
Speaker 1: This particular device carries a heavy price.
Speaker 2: Oh but it says free on the listing.
Speaker 12: Alright, free in as.
Speaker 2: Long as no money changes hands. That works for my needs.
Speaker 33: She's not in talent comes with the family cash.
Speaker 2: It's you what kind of course?
Speaker 4: Still interested?
Speaker 1: B t W?
Speaker 33: Whosoever is the holder of the PlayStation?
Speaker 1: That's also Jay? What comes weed? Which is hell? Wow?
Speaker 2: I'll take them both. Where is it convenient to meat
Speaker 2: to collect these free items?
Speaker 1: If you look behind you already there? I like Thursday perfect.
Speaker 2: I can't wait to play g t V.
Speaker 33: You don't have a PlayStation, don't actually do anything by itself?
Speaker 1: Scene? I mean, I think I was pretty convincing.
Speaker 2: I think so obviously not.
Speaker 1: That's how everyone else's interactions went.
Speaker 2: Yes, this this sounds like a violation of the rules, unbelieve.
Speaker 2: So obviously it was bullshit when it was a PlayStation portal.
Speaker 2: It was bullshit for the entire conversation. Also, I know
Speaker 2: that dog that Ethan's dog, So Melo is adorable. You're
Speaker 2: getting no point?
Speaker 1: Okay, full full disclosure, that was fake? Why Yeah, and
Speaker 1: I just for a second. The thing that I love
Speaker 1: the most is that expression seems to be saying, could
Speaker 1: you leave me out of this? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Could not want to be a part of this.
Speaker 7: Last Yeah, I kind of left it to the last
Speaker 7: minute and then contacted two people who ghosted me, and
Speaker 7: I was like, fuck this, I'm buying myself a PlayStation
Speaker 7: poll and calling it a prize.
Speaker 2: So you have a PlayStation portal and no points for
Speaker 2: this time?
Speaker 1: Oh, how would you like to screw the others?
Speaker 2: Okay, for the fact if it was just the standy cutouts,
Speaker 2: I might not say this, But the fact that there's
Speaker 2: a photo shoot in the company, Yeah, we're going for
Speaker 2: five points, so I do think next. I love the
Speaker 2: whole concept. I appreciate the gumption, but you interrupted me,
Speaker 2: and so four points is going to go to someone's
Speaker 2: marriage on Craig's list. We're going three points to the
Speaker 2: kanjo just because I see I see the look in
Speaker 2: your eyes, and I'm gonna get the three points. It
Speaker 2: would have been higher if we actually would have gotten
Speaker 2: the horse pillar, horse pillar, whatever that is. We're gonna
Speaker 2: go two points to the cactus ice cube tray and
Speaker 2: zero points because you falsified evidence in a court of law,
Speaker 2: studied legal studies. I had not let this stare. That
Speaker 2: is my.
Speaker 25: Final wins that particular task.
Speaker 1: I left that. All right, Shall we move on to
Speaker 1: our next task?
Speaker 2: I would love to This next.
Speaker 1: Pre recorded task is show and tell and show. You
Speaker 1: should have your next task. Go ahead and read it
Speaker 1: out loud for me.
Speaker 22: Go get your three favorite objects.
Speaker 8: From anyway in your.
Speaker 4: Home and bring them back here.
Speaker 19: You have five minutes.
Speaker 21: Your time starts now, okay, five minutes, five minutes.
Speaker 4: I'll be right back.
Speaker 1: All right, be right back, all right.
Speaker 34: Three favorite objects from your home, bring them back.
Speaker 21: Here, Okay, okay, okay, easy, easy.
Speaker 19: So I have so many favorite objects?
Speaker 1: Is the thing? Okay? All set, aw set, okay, I'm gonna.
Speaker 18: Say you still have three minutes to go, and no
Speaker 18: I don't need three minutes.
Speaker 14: I'll start with my oldest one, which is this little
Speaker 14: Pewter wizard. The next favorite object I have, and I
Speaker 14: think this counts, is this.
Speaker 19: Character sheet from a three point five Dad.
Speaker 14: My final favorite objects.
Speaker 8: Is this deck.
Speaker 19: This deck with pink sleeves.
Speaker 14: This is what magic the gathering nerds would know as
Speaker 14: a Hiromancer ascension deck.
Speaker 7: A professional wrestling championship. It's a custom professional wrestling championship.
Speaker 7: This framed letter object number three is just my favorite album.
Speaker 7: It's Worried by Jeff Rosenstock. Everyone should listen to it.
Speaker 7: Go listen to it now, stop watching the show and go.
Speaker 34: This is Optimus Prime.
Speaker 16: This is specifically, this is earth Rise Optimist Prime. That
Speaker 16: it's right up here, it's already kind of in the shot.
Speaker 16: This is my Sennheiser MKH four sixteen shotgun microphone. And
Speaker 16: then my final object that I love in my house
Speaker 16: came from mister Aaron Randolph himself.
Speaker 15: It's nice steen Dad.
Speaker 1: Gosh.
Speaker 21: I hope my wife and children aren't mad at me
Speaker 21: for not selecting like the kid's baby albums or like
Speaker 21: our wedding pictures.
Speaker 20: This really made you build a bear that I've had
Speaker 20: since I was like probably like twelve.
Speaker 22: The second thing is this felted sheep.
Speaker 20: Last thing is my favorite sweater I've ever made.
Speaker 1: Here we go.
Speaker 21: Next task, reenact your favorite movie scene using all three
Speaker 21: of the items selected.
Speaker 14: Okay, reenact your favorite movie scene using all three of
Speaker 14: the items you selected.
Speaker 22: You have twenty minutes to plan your scene and one
Speaker 22: minute to reenact it.
Speaker 21: Best to reenactment wins.
Speaker 14: Your time starts. Now you know the fucking hilarious thing?
Speaker 14: I think I have one, So give me, like, give
Speaker 14: me the twenty minutes.
Speaker 8: I got this twenty minutes.
Speaker 2: Okay. First question one, super excited to see the task?
Speaker 2: And do you want to validate that? In you big question?
Speaker 2: We did not see Caroline.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's a reason for that, which will soon become evident.
Speaker 1: I'm just gonna jump straight to it. Here you are
Speaker 1: Caroline's three favorite objects and her movie scene.
Speaker 5: Go get your three favorite objects.
Speaker 4: I'll be right back.
Speaker 16: He is.
Speaker 1: Oh, oh all right, hold on, okay, can you please
Speaker 1: explain what your objects are?
Speaker 2: Yes, Sarah, could you help me by handing me them
Speaker 2: one at a time.
Speaker 1: Please.
Speaker 4: My least favorite favorite object this is Willow. She is
Speaker 4: my Gremlin, Baba Duke child Object number is my favorite
Speaker 4: little boy. He's a professional podcaster in contact theater. We
Speaker 4: have this beautiful, perfect angel, baby Olive. Look at this baby,
Speaker 4: Look at her, Look at her.
Speaker 2: She's perfect.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna go ahead and say this has the potential
Speaker 1: to be either amazing or an absolute train.
Speaker 29: Oh.
Speaker 1: Go ahead and read the second part.
Speaker 34: Of the.
Speaker 5: Reenact your favorite movie scene using all three of the
Speaker 5: items you select It best reenactment.
Speaker 4: Wins your time starts now.
Speaker 35: Okay, guys, listen up. I need an Oscar winning performance here.
Speaker 35: All right, guys, Because you all are my children and
Speaker 35: I know that.
Speaker 31: You're so talented and gifted, we're just gonna go for it.
Speaker 1: Are you ready?
Speaker 12: Eric?
Speaker 28: Oh, I'm the beehive beehive bah, And since I'm a
Speaker 28: cad and I want to leave, I'm gonna leave now,
Speaker 28: and we're just gonna pretend that the beehive is rhady.
Speaker 5: Oh hey, ladies, I'm Igy Threadgood and I am a
Speaker 5: little lesbian.
Speaker 32: I also know how to charm these Oh in my eyeballs,
Speaker 32: I can charm them so good.
Speaker 4: But I'm just gonna go over to the beehive.
Speaker 5: Really slowly, okay, and I'm gonna get honey from the beehive.
Speaker 4: And none of the bees sing me because I'm magical.
Speaker 2: My gosh, I love.
Speaker 26: Look at this beautiful woman getting all that honey without
Speaker 26: being stung by a bee.
Speaker 4: That is absolutely amazing. That was beautiful.
Speaker 2: You're a beech charmer, gee threadgood, You're a bee charmer.
Speaker 1: That's what you are.
Speaker 4: Here's your honey, my love.
Speaker 2: Fuck you found this jar of honey inside the tree.
Speaker 2: And no, I actually did it without getting stung.
Speaker 1: By a fee.
Speaker 2: Where did the jar come from?
Speaker 26: Now Bee's lovingly into each other's eyes, but not kissed,
Speaker 26: because this is nineteen ninety eight.
Speaker 2: Incredible work. Okay, I don't know how things are going
Speaker 2: to follow that, but my notes say that things must.
Speaker 2: So oh, let's take a look at Jen and Augie's attempts.
Speaker 1: Yep, you've heard of gen Z and Jen Alpha. Now
Speaker 1: it's time for Jen.
Speaker 36: And now I shall perform to you my favorite scene
Speaker 36: in one of my favorite movie, Lord of the Rings.
Speaker 14: May I begin.
Speaker 19: A bell rock, A demon of the ancient world.
Speaker 1: You cannot pass.
Speaker 36: I am a servant of the sacred fire usor dark
Speaker 36: fire will not availue flame balldon, you shall not pass.
Speaker 1: Got three?
Speaker 2: Is that enough?
Speaker 1: A man.
Speaker 20: Being lowered down into a room head first, I'm somewhere
Speaker 20: outside in a van.
Speaker 2: He's rolling to you.
Speaker 22: He's at the voice recorder.
Speaker 2: Going straight down. The guy played by the sheep not
Speaker 2: in the frame, trying really hard.
Speaker 22: He's going down.
Speaker 2: Uh oh, they'd also buy the sheep.
Speaker 22: The guy comes back in. I know he's working at
Speaker 22: this desk.
Speaker 2: What.
Speaker 22: Oh, his tummy is upset.
Speaker 20: Oh, now he's taking beds being dropped down.
Speaker 4: But don't know.
Speaker 2: Guy in the an event there's.
Speaker 1: A rat and he goes flat.
Speaker 22: He's laying there. He's laying there.
Speaker 4: What does he to do?
Speaker 2: I drop his sweat? What he catches it? He puts
Speaker 2: the dissk in. It's copying one bread.
Speaker 4: Be careful, Ethan, get moving.
Speaker 2: Don't worry. The guy comes back in and he gets
Speaker 2: pulled up. And then at the last second they're in
Speaker 2: the event after being pulled up, and he's excited.
Speaker 20: But then next drops The guy comes back in looking
Speaker 20: and he sees an innocuous knife stuck.
Speaker 2: Into the computer.
Speaker 20: As they all celebrate that they got the knocklist out
Speaker 20: of the computer.
Speaker 2: But also this guy gets fired or this one thing,
Speaker 2: but the knife is kept eight movies later and a
Speaker 2: thing so good. I'm loving the suspense, I'm loving the referencing,
Speaker 2: uh and the creative use of those things in one
Speaker 2: of my favorite films of all time. That will play
Speaker 2: well for you.
Speaker 1: Ooh, this is so good.
Speaker 2: Let's see Dave and Matt's entries.
Speaker 1: Finally, there are two of the most entertaining men I
Speaker 1: know with the most boring white guy ass names. It's
Speaker 1: Da Matt.
Speaker 34: Obviously, the time continue has been disrupted squence, resulting in
Speaker 34: this alternate reality English doc Let me illustrate.
Speaker 16: Imagine that this line represents time.
Speaker 34: Here's the present nineteen eighty five, the future, and the
Speaker 34: past prior to this point in time. Somewhere in the past,
Speaker 34: the timeline skewed into this tangent, creating an alternate nineteen
Speaker 34: eighty five alternate to you, Me, and Einstein, but reality
Speaker 34: for everyone else, recognize this. It's the bag the sports
Speaker 34: book came in. I know because the receipt was still inside.
Speaker 34: I found them in the time machine. Along with this,
Speaker 34: It's a time of bibskne I mean all from the future.
Speaker 16: Correct.
Speaker 37: It was in the time machine because bif was in
Speaker 37: the time machine with the sports Hopmanac.
Speaker 1: Holy shit.
Speaker 34: You see, when we were in the future, Beff got
Speaker 34: the sports book, stole the time machine, went back in time,
Speaker 34: and gave the.
Speaker 37: Book to himself at some point in the past book.
Speaker 37: He says right here that Biff made his first million
Speaker 37: betting on a horse race in nineteen fifty eight. He
Speaker 37: wasn't just lucky, he knew because he had all the
Speaker 37: race results in the sportsmenach.
Speaker 34: That's how he made his entire hordrone. Look at his
Speaker 34: pocket with a magnifying glass the almanac so.
Speaker 1: A bit still, he must have been listening when I follow.
Speaker 1: The whole thing is my fault, the damn put none
Speaker 1: of this would have rap. And where it's all in
Speaker 1: the past, you mean the future?
Speaker 37: Whatever it can be misused, and why the time machine
Speaker 37: must be destroyed after we straighten all this out right,
Speaker 37: So we gotta go.
Speaker 6: Back to the future and stop it from stealing the
Speaker 6: time machine.
Speaker 37: We can't because if we travel into the future from
Speaker 37: this point in time, it will be the future of
Speaker 37: this reality in which Biff is corrupt, powerful and married
Speaker 37: to your mother, and in which this has happened to me.
Speaker 34: No, No, our only chance to repair. The present is
Speaker 34: in the past at the point where the timeline skewed
Speaker 34: into this tangent. In order to fact, we have to
Speaker 34: find out the exact die in specific circumstances of how, when,
Speaker 34: and where young Biff got his hands on that sports almanac.
Speaker 37: I'll ask him.
Speaker 1: You enjoy the creative way he brought his third item
Speaker 1: in there?
Speaker 2: Yes, Oh my goodness, incredible.
Speaker 1: I don't know how you're gonna sure these everything else.
Speaker 2: I've had a pretty solid idea of how I wanted
Speaker 2: to do it, and this I'm going to decide that
Speaker 2: I have a solid idea of how I want to
Speaker 2: do it for the sake of time. I loved Aggie's
Speaker 2: creative use of his props and him playing to my
Speaker 2: favorite movie. So I'm gonna give Oggie five points.
Speaker 38: WHOA.
Speaker 2: I cannot deny the fact that Caroline had the toughest
Speaker 2: job here of three cats moving, and so I'm going
Speaker 2: to give her four points. I am loving. I just
Speaker 2: loved the suspense that Jen's story brought in, and then
Speaker 2: also the referencing to the wider lore. I had just
Speaker 2: watched all of the Mission Impossible movies from one to
Speaker 2: like whatever the one came out this year.
Speaker 1: I'm so sorry.
Speaker 2: It's his And if I could take points away from
Speaker 2: him for subjecting that you to that, I would, but
Speaker 2: I can't. But what I can do is give you
Speaker 2: those three points. I this is this is very tough.
Speaker 2: All of this has been tough. I am going to
Speaker 2: give Matt two points here. I liked the creativity. I
Speaker 2: liked the camera work in here. I liked the use
Speaker 2: of the third prop, and Dave, I am penalizing you
Speaker 2: for your incredible voice act, but just in that I
Speaker 2: felt like it overshadowed the three props that you brought in.
Speaker 2: I felt that that was the main thing and not
Speaker 2: the props. And as a result, that is That's the
Speaker 2: way I'm scoring it.
Speaker 1: Yes, all right, Yeah they were always as.
Speaker 2: I would see any of them in theaters, and honestly
Speaker 2: I just did, and I see it again, wonderful.
Speaker 38: Each of us identify with one of the Golden Girls.
Speaker 38: I'm Sophia, Aaron is Dorothy, Kristen is sweet Rose. And
Speaker 38: each week we'll have a guest sit in the Blanche
Speaker 38: spot the naughty seat. Come join us on the Lani
Speaker 38: Vers of Cheesecake, part of the PUDs Media Network.
Speaker 39: Hey, Jeff, what are we doing?
Speaker 15: Why are you whispering?
Speaker 39: Because all of our devices are constantly listening to us.
Speaker 39: Unless we take massive efforts to protect our online privacy,
Speaker 39: all the details of our lives will be in the
Speaker 39: hands of mega corporations.
Speaker 15: Okay, sure, but this is the promo for our podcast.
Speaker 15: We need people to be able to hear us this time.
Speaker 15: Why do we need a promo? Oh funny you should ask.
Speaker 15: We're not members of the Odd Pods media network.
Speaker 39: Are they one of those global conglomerates.
Speaker 15: No, they're just a really awesome podcast network full of
Speaker 15: great shows like ours.
Speaker 39: Well, is there anything specific we need to say?
Speaker 15: We should probably tell them what our podcast is about.
Speaker 39: Oh, it's about how the algorithm shapes our lives and
Speaker 39: how tech companies profit off our personal information. We dabble
Speaker 39: in tech conspiracy theories and talk about how billionaires are
Speaker 39: all buttholes.
Speaker 15: I don't think we should say buttholes.
Speaker 39: In the promo, but we already did twice.
Speaker 15: Join us every other Monday for new episodes of suggested
Speaker 15: articles a podcast.
Speaker 1: Okay, task Mistress. To start the next task, could you
Speaker 1: yell out your favorite word fuck? All right, Matt, if
Speaker 1: you're ready, for your next task. Go ahead and read
Speaker 1: it out loud for me.
Speaker 19: Yes, write down six words.
Speaker 4: Write down six words.
Speaker 21: You have one minute.
Speaker 1: Your time starts now, all right?
Speaker 21: Why do I have a feeling I am going to
Speaker 21: be in trouble no matter what six words I write?
Speaker 9: Done?
Speaker 15: Oh, that was quick.
Speaker 1: You still got forty seconds.
Speaker 2: How's your date?
Speaker 5: Eric?
Speaker 15: That was quick?
Speaker 24: All right?
Speaker 1: If you're all done, you still got thirty seconds.
Speaker 4: I'm done.
Speaker 1: You're done? All right? Six words perfect timing? Your time
Speaker 1: just ran out?
Speaker 8: Okay?
Speaker 7: Yes, my six words are beefy, twelve horses, examine, jump
Speaker 7: and lemons.
Speaker 4: Tuna, sailor, the I sleep, Sarah, girl.
Speaker 22: Pants, knit, mouse, collage.
Speaker 21: Mine, paprikas, flop house, energy, hoodwinked, sausage, and.
Speaker 1: Communal six words.
Speaker 19: And then I stopped being a smart ass and said seven, eight, nine,
Speaker 19: and ten.
Speaker 1: Read out the second part of your task whenever you're ready,
Speaker 1: all right.
Speaker 7: Write a poem about Jen Reagan, using each of your
Speaker 7: chosen words to end a line.
Speaker 15: Sorry, Jen.
Speaker 22: Write a poem about Matt Watson.
Speaker 4: Write a poem about August Daniels buck Uh.
Speaker 14: Write a poem about David Ottovino, using each of your
Speaker 14: chosen words.
Speaker 21: Okay, I'm gonna open my eyes and read the second
Speaker 21: part of the task, and I'm there might be some tears.
Speaker 22: I'm gonna cry a little bit.
Speaker 34: Here we go, all right.
Speaker 1: Second part of the task is.
Speaker 6: Write a poem about Carolinula, using each of your chosen
Speaker 6: words to end end a line, which must then be
Speaker 6: rhymed with on the following line.
Speaker 8: The resulting poem should be twelve lines.
Speaker 22: Long, funniest poem.
Speaker 1: Whens.
Speaker 4: Do you have twenty minutes to time starts now?
Speaker 15: Okay, okay, okay, twenty minutes.
Speaker 6: That's generous, all right, twenty minutes so okay, okay, all right.
Speaker 8: All right, sweet, let's get to work on some poetry.
Speaker 32: Okay.
Speaker 1: And if it wasn't clear, August is Augie, oh I love.
Speaker 20: You were not ready for the slam poetry against one
Speaker 20: Matt waited for.
Speaker 2: It is about to happen.
Speaker 1: The task is pretty simple. I gave them a minute
Speaker 1: to write down whatever six words they wanted and told
Speaker 1: them that they had to write a poem using each
Speaker 1: word at the end of the line, and it must
Speaker 1: then be rhymed with on the following line. Some of
Speaker 1: the contestants took some liberties with that, but regardless, So
Speaker 1: I'm going to see some poems wrong, wrong, and I'm
Speaker 1: so disappointed in you. You should never be heroes. Instead,
Speaker 1: we're going to dive into the first team task of
Speaker 1: the series. Caroline, you should have the next task in
Speaker 1: the chat. Go ahead and read it out loud for me.
Speaker 5: Read the passage I send you to your teammates without
Speaker 5: either of you or your teammates smiling or laughing.
Speaker 1: Each of you will have to read one passage.
Speaker 20: After all passages have been read. The team that broke
Speaker 20: the you wist average times per team member wits Your
Speaker 20: time starts now.
Speaker 8: Okay, just keeping my just keeping my mouth very tightly closed.
Speaker 1: Yes, Individually, I set them to write the funniest poem
Speaker 1: they could about people who they did not know at
Speaker 1: the time were their teammates. And then I made them
Speaker 1: read those poems to their teammates and penalize them for
Speaker 1: smiling or laughing. It's the old taskmaster one two punch.
Speaker 2: You asshole.
Speaker 1: This is why I hired you. Now you may have
Speaker 1: caught onto this. As it happens, nobody laughed during the task,
Speaker 1: so I was brutal about counting smiles. If it was
Speaker 1: a half smile or a beginning of one. I counted it.
Speaker 1: The only rule in the contestants favor was that if
Speaker 1: they smiled but don't return to neutral, it only counts
Speaker 1: as one. You'll see a couple of smiles. I don't
Speaker 1: count for that reason. Okay, Audrew? Would you like to
Speaker 1: see Augie, Caroline and Dave read poems to each other?
Speaker 2: I would like nothing more in this life.
Speaker 1: That's a shame. Here's Matt and Jane, so.
Speaker 8: I'm to begin my reading. Is that correct?
Speaker 34: Jen?
Speaker 7: Your diet leans toward beefy, whereas mine over here is
Speaker 7: a little more leafy. You believed in Jesus when you
Speaker 7: were twelve, but his Western philosophies you decided to shelve.
Speaker 7: You moved too much to ever own horses because your
Speaker 7: father was in the armed forces. Which state are you from?
Speaker 7: Let's examine Missouri, Hawaii, Colorado, but not Alabama. But sincerely, friend,
Speaker 7: with joy, you make me jump. Your presence makes it
Speaker 7: worth enduring President Trump. I love your husband, Chris, though
Speaker 7: a bit of a lemon. This is how I tell you.
Speaker 7: He and I are moving to Bremen. That's in Germany. Yes,
Speaker 7: just making sure to not accidentally smile out of politeness
Speaker 7: while facing a webcam.
Speaker 20: Wow, Matt, what an aspiring display of affection and random
Speaker 20: details about my life.
Speaker 8: Yes, That's what I could remember and felt was important.
Speaker 20: He's just a boy, and I'm just a girl. He
Speaker 20: has the attention span of a squirrel. Adre wears the pants.
Speaker 20: He just rants and rants. I helped to teach Adra
Speaker 20: to knit. He appreciates a good bit. He likes to
Speaker 20: pretend that he's quiet as a mouse, but try to
Speaker 20: challenge him.
Speaker 22: And he's a party house.
Speaker 20: If I gathered all of our for wonderful moments, I'd
Speaker 20: have a collage. His games show Persona.
Speaker 4: Is just a mirage.
Speaker 20: In a different life, he'd be a great mime. Speaking
Speaker 20: of bits, I meant to curdle the butter and mine.
Speaker 1: They just stayed silent for like five seconds.
Speaker 2: A bit of lored. There was a challenge we had
Speaker 2: at our house playing games where we had to make
Speaker 2: people eat weird things and then guess what it was.
Speaker 1: And there was an oreo.
Speaker 2: The gin made me eat full of butter and lime,
Speaker 2: and it did curdle. We've been wanting her to confirm
Speaker 2: it was on purpose.
Speaker 1: Four months.
Speaker 2: Incredible work.
Speaker 1: Would you like to hear some stats.
Speaker 2: I would love to hear some stats.
Speaker 1: Jen smiled only once and Matt smiled seven times, for
Speaker 1: a total of eight smiles and an average of four
Speaker 1: smiles per person. Happy, guys, you.
Speaker 2: Live a joyous life, and I love that you had
Speaker 2: to control your emotions.
Speaker 1: Smiling.
Speaker 2: It's not handy.
Speaker 1: Let's see more now of Oggi, Caroline and Dave. We
Speaker 1: have two talented and trained actors and one professional stoner
Speaker 1: who could possibly be the weak link here.
Speaker 4: What am I doing here?
Speaker 31: Says I on a discord call with all these guys,
Speaker 31: but one stood out as the big tuna and had
Speaker 31: me instantly saying, booh yeah, it's dearest Augie, swearing like
Speaker 31: a sailor, even cooler than swift Comma Taylor careson.
Speaker 17: So fine.
Speaker 4: They call him the man of the app.
Speaker 2: Or just look and see.
Speaker 40: Sadly, he's never left met darling Sarah. Now do we
Speaker 40: get them to meet and wear a well? Now it's
Speaker 40: time for Aggie to sleep.
Speaker 31: I miss him so much I could just Weeper's.
Speaker 19: Poem I've ever received.
Speaker 1: It's the only poem I've ever received.
Speaker 21: I have a friend who's energy is max a perfect
Speaker 21: ten or g to think of Caroline's raw bossage.
Speaker 41: She's as spicy as a sausage. In speech or song,
Speaker 41: She'll craft a tunal make us raise a cheer communal.
Speaker 41: Unlest you think I've been hoodwinked, my tatue artist went
Speaker 41: and inked expensive picture of her cheek, a color not
Speaker 41: unlike paprika.
Speaker 15: Upon my skin.
Speaker 1: And here here's my hot grouse. Now I live in
Speaker 1: this here flop house.
Speaker 2: That was very good.
Speaker 4: I enjoyed that immensely.
Speaker 14: David Otrovino, six to ten, the accumulated time we've known
Speaker 14: each other in years feels like six. Fix is what
Speaker 14: you did for our podcast of words. Herds of fans
Speaker 14: flocked to your voice in rows of seven heaven nearly there.
Speaker 19: Being trapped by your stairs if being eight.
Speaker 1: Wait, that came out wrong.
Speaker 8: Let me try that again using nine.
Speaker 14: Fine is how I feel about you.
Speaker 1: We're friends.
Speaker 14: We definitely did not know each other for six years,
Speaker 14: but it feels like ten.
Speaker 1: You should say that. After they finished, they all broke
Speaker 1: out in the laughter. So you have two tasks to
Speaker 1: score here. First it's the funniest poem, and then it's
Speaker 1: the two teams individually. I can give you a little
Speaker 1: help with the teams with some stats you like. By
Speaker 1: my count, Caroline smiled once at the very beginning and
Speaker 1: never again. Dave has apparently never experienced joy at all,
Speaker 1: and Augie smiled eight times from a total of nine
Speaker 1: and an average of three per person.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, very interesting. So we will four teams. The
Speaker 2: points will be as thus in that the team of
Speaker 2: three will get how do they typically do that? Five points.
Speaker 1: For the team of three, and how many for the
Speaker 1: team of two who came close?
Speaker 2: They did come close. I'm gonna go four.
Speaker 1: Now, which of these poems did you think was the funniest.
Speaker 2: Ooh, this is tough because as the task mistress, I
Speaker 2: forgot two tasks were occurring simultaneously.
Speaker 1: That's on me for not reminding you. Please punish me.
Speaker 2: Later later if you asked Daddy nicely. I'm gonna go
Speaker 2: because it took a couple I think it took a
Speaker 2: couple of shots at my husband. I'm gonna go Jen
Speaker 2: five points and then let's go. Let's go Caroline.
Speaker 1: I Oh, this is tough.
Speaker 2: This is tough. You guys did a really great job
Speaker 2: and this is very difficult, and I would like you
Speaker 2: to acknowledge that it's probably more difficult for me though.
Speaker 2: If anyone's had a really hard time, it's me. Let's
Speaker 2: go three points, David, David, and let's give two points
Speaker 2: each to Matt and Augie.
Speaker 1: That sounds good, amazing.
Speaker 2: You have these down. Thank you so much for writing.
Speaker 2: Then you're an incredible assistant.
Speaker 1: Thank you. All right, Well that's all the pre recorded
Speaker 1: test for tonight's episode. I think it's time for the
Speaker 1: live task incredible, Okay, you excuse us for a few minutes.
Speaker 1: We have to set up.
Speaker 12: From that.
Speaker 2: I'll have Caroline reading out for her and understanding. Thank you.
Speaker 3: Everyone ready, Yes, all right? Write a number on each
Speaker 3: base of your die. Each base of your die must
Speaker 3: have a unique number on it before time expires, or
Speaker 3: you will be disqualified. You have one hundred seconds. Time
Speaker 3: starts when the task mistress shall die?
Speaker 1: Has ever been to understand?
Speaker 2: You want me to read it one more time. Yes,
Speaker 2: write a number on each face of your die.
Speaker 3: Each face of your die must have a unique number
Speaker 3: on it before time expires, or you will be disqualified.
Speaker 3: You have one hundred seconds. Your time starts when the
Speaker 3: task Mistress shouts die. So I understand they're trying not
Speaker 3: to match numbers with any other contestant.
Speaker 1: No, they can, but they cannot match a number on
Speaker 1: two different bases of the same die. There must be
Speaker 1: six different numbers.
Speaker 2: Phenomenal. Okay, Die, if.
Speaker 1: Numbers, I'm just gonna wing the timekeeping because I forgot
Speaker 1: to bring into the timekeeping advice. If I'm just watching that,
Speaker 1: I should have put some music up show tomorrow. Okay,
Speaker 1: sounds good?
Speaker 42: Yeah, no, okay, okay, raise your day about you if
Speaker 42: you are completed so far?
Speaker 3: Okay, dedicated to her craft as always. This is how
Speaker 3: a scarlet witch.
Speaker 1: Okay, every's done, and yeah, about twenty seconds. Well done. Okay,
Speaker 1: you would you mind reading out your numbers? Yeah?
Speaker 11: I got thirty seven sixty seven.
Speaker 1: Four twenty thirteen. Did they say one time? Yeah? Okay,
Speaker 1: I think I was a lot of them. All right, Caroline,
Speaker 1: you have written multiple Yeah, so is that one hundred
Speaker 1: and twenty three thousand, four hundred fifty six?
Speaker 32: No, it's one, two, three, four, five six. And then
Speaker 32: on this side we have four with seventy eight, nine, ten, eleven, twelve.
Speaker 32: This could be amazing or an absolutelyeen seventy eighteen, nineteen,
Speaker 32: twenty twenty one, twenty two twenty four, twenty five, twenty six,
Speaker 32: twenty seven, twenty eight, twenty nine, A right two.
Speaker 2: Have been made.
Speaker 1: One two, three, four, five, eleven thousand, two hundred thirty
Speaker 1: seven point four, then one.
Speaker 2: Three eight six seventeen twenty and.
Speaker 1: Finally that zero, one, six, seven, sixty nine and one
Speaker 1: hundred Andre, Who would you like to read the second
Speaker 1: part of the task Let's go with day. Don't touch
Speaker 1: it like don't.
Speaker 11: Just did you.
Speaker 1: Survive? The color?
Speaker 12: Every round, the task mistress will declare a category and
Speaker 12: the players will individually throw their dice. The player who's
Speaker 12: die most it's the task mistresses category that round wid
Speaker 12: the last player standing wins. Bottom of page the word taskmaster.
Speaker 12: That's okay, doesn't know I didn't this information distractions?
Speaker 19: Yeah?
Speaker 11: That give you.
Speaker 1: Think about that all right, Test mistriss, What is our
Speaker 1: first category?
Speaker 2: The first category? The number that is the most fun
Speaker 2: to say?
Speaker 1: Whoever number that is the most fun to say is eliminated?
Speaker 1: Roll your dice. There we go. Your number is.
Speaker 3: Carol seven or eight or nine or ten or eleven
Speaker 3: or twelve?
Speaker 1: Dave five?
Speaker 43: Okay, no seven, which is the most fun to say?
Speaker 43: Mm hmm, I think five even the most oh, and
Speaker 43: so I will think.
Speaker 1: It was well, then you're eliminated. Maating players, please replaying
Speaker 1: your dice. Next category, the sexiest. Okay, here's a big here,
Speaker 1: you play. Roll your dice.
Speaker 29: Off your.
Speaker 1: Allright? Thirty seven.
Speaker 3: Caroline thirteen fourteen, fifteen, sixteen, seventeen, eighteen.
Speaker 1: Ten twenty seven.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm going to go thirty seven. It's the sexiest
Speaker 2: them eurero to me.
Speaker 1: Next category, This is the number that.
Speaker 2: Is closest to Aaron's favorite.
Speaker 1: Number, which is ironically thirty seven.
Speaker 2: Eliminated, All right, roll your dice.
Speaker 1: All Carolina, Caroline, would you roll twice? Hold on.
Speaker 2: Two million, hundred twenty you your staff if they were.
Speaker 1: Twenty? Okay? Mat sixty nine.
Speaker 2: By technicality is Carol?
Speaker 1: All right? Caroline, you're up to take your seat. It
Speaker 1: is just Jen and Matt left. And the final category the.
Speaker 3: Number that is closest to my favorite cover, which as
Speaker 3: my husband and my best friend you either of you know,
Speaker 3: I had to decide.
Speaker 2: That my favorite number was all right?
Speaker 1: Roll oh that you got seven? Seven?
Speaker 29: Again?
Speaker 24: Jan?
Speaker 1: What'd you get? What means? Jen's a winner?
Speaker 2: Numbers?
Speaker 1: Yes, the basket of prizes.
Speaker 2: Gosh, it's incredible. Eric could you give me a quick
Speaker 2: recap of the live task scoring?
Speaker 1: Okay, so the live task, David at first gets one point,
Speaker 1: well by Augi who gets two, Caroline who gets three.
Speaker 1: Matt was flashed out with four, who me with five.
Speaker 2: Before we discover who won the episode? Ogie, What are
Speaker 2: you doing? Where can people find the creative projects you're
Speaker 2: working on?
Speaker 16: Oh?
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm a part of a podcast. I podcast.
Speaker 44: Show here where we do British style comedy shows and
Speaker 44: we ourselves on a regular basis. Check me out there, ladies.
Speaker 2: Hell yeah, where can people find you? I'm Caroline.
Speaker 5: I am a voice actor and podcaster. I have a
Speaker 5: podcast with my two best friends from middle school called
Speaker 5: Ultra Hope Girls, a Dog and Rompa podcast if you
Speaker 5: know what that is. I'm also a voice actor. You
Speaker 5: can find what I'm working on at www dot Caroline
Speaker 5: O R E j U E l a dot com.
Speaker 5: Amazing Dave, what you got going on?
Speaker 12: I am David Auto Vino Auto as in car Veno
Speaker 12: as in wine, Drink and Drive, and you can google
Speaker 12: that name and find me all over the internet. I'm
Speaker 12: an actor and professional voiceover artist. You can find me
Speaker 12: at my website on Instagram, Blue Sky and YouTube.
Speaker 2: Uh not a professional voice actor, but I do as
Speaker 2: a host. I've made it my personality and Nick Crochet
Speaker 2: spin and do other fiber related arts and you can
Speaker 2: find those at half double Docent on Instagram.
Speaker 7: I'm Matt Watson. I make a podcast called Gates Leapers.
Speaker 7: It's a fandom game show. We play silly games. We
Speaker 7: get comedians to compete against each other with different themed
Speaker 7: fandoms each time order and I make that together with
Speaker 7: the help of lovely, wonderful guests and funny people. You
Speaker 7: can find us on Instagram at Gates Leaper's Pod, Gate
Speaker 7: Leaper's Pod I need to learn how to say my
Speaker 7: teas and find us on Spotify and all that good stuff.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and Aaron Randolph, can you please reveal the final scurse?
Speaker 1: I can, but first om kidding last place with eighteen points,
Speaker 1: it's Matt.
Speaker 15: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Just a step above with nineteen points, it's Aggie in
Speaker 1: third place, a reputable twenty one points. David. So, our
Speaker 1: two ladies are on the top and they're separated by
Speaker 1: just one. Think it's you. The twenty eight points it's
Speaker 1: Caroline and the twenty nine is.
Speaker 29: Jen Incredible phenomenal Congratulations Jen, please collect your prizes that
Speaker 29: are kind of like your competitors, but not quite like
Speaker 29: you're the competitors.
Speaker 2: She said it, Sarah, you want your payback, I can
Speaker 2: put it at your house. Yes please, I'm actually really
Speaker 2: excited about this. It's a little drinking.
Speaker 1: It won't work, I don't know.
Speaker 4: Amazing.
Speaker 2: So what have we learned today? We have learned that
Speaker 2: pansies have little faces on them. We've learned my husband
Speaker 2: is a liar, and we've learned that Jen has one taskmaster.
Speaker 2: Night one Jo.
Speaker 1: Please come back tomorrow to see even more tasks and
Speaker 1: the thrilling conclusion find out who's going home with that
Speaker 1: trophy above. For now, that's it for us. Good night.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna get shop.