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Speaker 1: My kids don't remember all the times I screwed up.

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They have this you for it thought process that I

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was perfect because they remember the good times, right, So

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they stacked the winds stack and that's how they see me.

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But here's the deal. The reason that exists is because

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they felt loved. Bottom line, love covers up mistakes, It

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covers up mishaps. I apologize to my kids when necessary.

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My kids would tell you I apologize, and I still

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do today. And if you're willing to be that love

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will cover up a lot of the stupid that's impossible.

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Speaker 2: Let me tell you what I believe.

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Speaker 1: What's your weakness.

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Speaker 2: It's not your technique. Don't think you of know you

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the Impossible Life Podcast. I mean you're sitting on a

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winning a lot.

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Speaker 3: Of seconds, an idea that is fully formed, fully understood,

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that sticks. This is the Possible Life Podcast because Nick

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and I are attempting to live impossible lives. What we

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know is that nothing is impossible. So instead of using

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impossible as an excuse to not try, we'll use the

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pursuit of impossible as an accelerant for greatness. If something's

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never been done before, that just means it's unexplored. If

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they tell you it's too hard, it's just waiting to

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be simplified. Impossible as a default label used by uncourageous

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people unwilling to take a risk. The real truth is

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this The solution to any impossible task starts with this question,

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if I had to, what would it take?

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Speaker 1: What would it take?

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Speaker 2: Welcome to another episode of the Impossible Life Podcast. I'm

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your co host Nick Surface, and I'm looking across at

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a man whose favorite knock knock joke goes, that's right,

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friends the phone, Garret, uncle back, a man who wouldn't

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let anyone get close enough to knock knock.

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Speaker 3: Knock knock America's hereof there you go.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that one was that took on. That was my

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third take because I don't normally employ that many button

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presses into a way.

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Speaker 3: We're definitely not putting you at the front of the

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stack to throw the flashbanks.

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Speaker 2: It's okay, Look, dude, I could throw a flash bang

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a lot there, and I could do that intro because

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there's a lot of coordinator button pressing. Now you may

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hear a much warmer uncle Back laugh, maybe one that

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you even like more. That's because we've got pops Scott

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uncle Bock with us for today's podcast. Pop's welcome, glad

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to be here, second time guest. I'm pumped to have you.

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We're having you here because obviously this is going to drop.

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This our final full episode before Father's Day. We're very

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passionate about men, seeing men run hard after God, and

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we know that there's a lot of guys who are fathers,

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and there's a lot of guys that if they're not fathers,

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they want to be fathers. And so we're like, man,

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we got to invest in the fathers. You and I

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got some fruit. Gee, but we're still in progress. Let's

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go to somebody who's got undisputed did fruit? Aka your dad?

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Speaker 3: A lot of people come to Pops for some father wisdom.

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Speaker 2: Yeah and there and like, truthfully, the hundreds of people

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come like come to your dad and well and like

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obviously you were on here before with Darlene originally when

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we talked about parenting. So now to be very specific,

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this is how to be a great godly father. That's

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really what we're covering today. So this will be relevant

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for all the men listening. If you're a woman who

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listens to this, which I know we actually have plenty

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of women listening. Pass it on to the man that

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you love as well, because.

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Speaker 3: It'll be a blessed And I know we're going to talk,

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We're going to talk about it from a godly perspective,

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but I would say, really, what we're going to get

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into today is what makes a great father, because you

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can be a godly or Christian dad, and that is

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a part of being a great father. But I think

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there's more to it than that. Oh yeah, right, you

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know you would if you're going to be the father

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that God intended you to be, that's being a great father.

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But I just want to I want to say that's

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what we're going to dive into with Pops, because there's

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other dads who I think, you know, they they're checking

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the spiritual box as a father, but it doesn't mean

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they're a great one.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And that's I think that that's a real kind

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of warning shot right there, because you really can from

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the place of having great intentions still miss it like well,

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I was chasing hard after God and it's like, yeah,

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that's good. But there's wisdom to what it takes to

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develop great kids. I mean, you've developed a Navy seal

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and a doctor, So you've done all right there.

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Speaker 1: Well, yes, so there's definitely some fruit. And to just

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mention what you guys are just now talking about, there's

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some amazing people in the Bible that had some very

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difficult times. Yeah, it didn't all work out because of

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their actions. And fatherhood's the same way. So you can

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beat hard after God, but you're missing two or three

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of the key parts of you're walking out your journey,

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and it leaves a huge gap for your children. And

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so you might they might see that you're consistent in

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one area, but not a consistent in all areas. And

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so that's one of the things that I've tried to

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focus on, and one of the things I try to

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teach to the men is be you know, have a

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broader focus on what it means to be a father.

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And there's multiple pieces to that.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, well just for example, and this isn't a shot

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at them, but this is a great example of it.

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There's plenty of pastors who aren't great debts, right, so

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they may be godly men, but that didn't mean they

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were great fathers.

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Speaker 2: Well, you have Eli in the Bible, who was the

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priest for Solomon, who's the wisest man that ever lived,

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and what did his son do? Got on and was like,

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you know what, I'm gonna do the exact opposite of

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everything my dad did. Yeah, you can't tell me he

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didn't miss a few tricks there as a father and

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his thousand wives, because you know, you don't put a

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kid like that on the throne have him to do

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the exact opposite if you were doing everything like we're

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gonna be talking about today. But before we dive in,

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I got a thotse surprise for you possible before we

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dive in. If you're watching on video, you're gonna notice

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that Me, Garrett, and Pops are all looking, you know,

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especially chiseled in our Jesus one T shirts. Now, I'm

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really pumped about this because we become friends with Matt,

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who is a great guy man. What I love about

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Matt is that he like loves the Lord. Obviously we

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all met him because we hung out with him. He

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went with us to the Bible study last week, flew

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in just to hang out with us, came to mighty men.

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He's the owner of Jesus one Apparel and if you

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don't follow Jesus one on Instagram, follow them because it's awesome.

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There are athletes in sports all over the country starting

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to rock Jesus one shirts. And what's so cool about

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them is, first of all, the message is amazing Jesus won,

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which is true. So it's just a great conversation starter,

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which we've had a few of those. And he does

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them in like the fonts of the teams. So like

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Mike Trout, who's one of the best baseball players that's

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ever lived, is walking around all the time in a

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Jesus one shirt in the Angels font, and like they

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can wear them on the field because it's the team colors.

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So we got with Matt and we actually have our

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very own one that's in Impossible Life colors. So it's

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bright neon green, it's got our font, and it's got

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our logo on the back neck. I wear this thing

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to the gym. We all wore them for the first

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time last week at the game and Josh Young of

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the Rangers stop and was like, hey, love your shirts.

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Speaker 3: Well, and we got to see Evan too, Evan Carter,

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who's been a guest on the show. And I didn't

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know this until Matt was kind of telling the story.

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You know, the reason that we had Evan on the show,

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the reason that we found the brand of Jesus Jesus

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won was when, you know, because Evan's story is super cool,

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gets called up to the Major's beginning of the season

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and then you know, goes on they win the World

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Series that year. Evan is second to Mickey Mantle. If

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you're second to many Mickey Mantle in any stat, it's

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a pretty impressive stat.

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Speaker 1: First.

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Speaker 2: Second, he was the second youngest number three hitter in

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the World Series ever in baseball.

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Speaker 3: And and I thought it was also the stat of

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God on base in every game. Yeah, he got here

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every game, and so second to Mickey Mantle on that.

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So anyways, point being, you know, we saw Evan where

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the Sherman like, oh, that's cool, that must be a thing.

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Speaker 1: Well it wasn't really a thing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that was the beginning.

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Speaker 3: That was the beginning of Jesus one really becoming a thing.

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And so we had Evan on the show. Was so

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it was a great kind of serendipitous lap there at

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Ranger Stadium seeing so seeing Evan being there with Matt.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, because the first time I met Matt, I was

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wearing my original Evan Carter Jesus one shirt and Matt's like, hey,

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that thing still looks pretty good for three years old,

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and I was like, dude, I wear it to every

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Rangers game. I know what I'll say about these shirts.

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They're great, They're comfortable, they really do fit well. But

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what I love I've never had ever worn them and

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not had people comment. I got free chips at Chipotle,

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which was awesome. Every time I go to the Ring

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asterisk not guarantee, but they're definitely a bonus. And then

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Garrett's favorite interaction that we had as we were leaving

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the game, there was a fan who was maybe perhaps inebriated,

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that saw my shirts. I was walking first and goes,

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oh Jesus won Hell yeah, and then gave me like

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a high five.

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Speaker 1: Hell no.

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Speaker 2: But Garrett Love, you were very abused by that response

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to this, But.

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Speaker 1: It was cool. I mean, you got players on Cleveland

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wearing them, players on the Rangers wearing them. Yeah, and

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of course we had them on behind my home plate.

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Nobody's asking what was going on. It was really it

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was really entertaining to see how impactful it were. Yeah.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, so it's a great one. Shout out to Matt yes,

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and Matt and Matt. What I'll say about Matt, Matt

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loves the Lord. He's a relational, authentic dude. He's been

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a chaplain in the MLB for a long time working

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in the FCA. Like, what's awesome is that Matt has

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a very God centered mission and we are very proud

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to partner with them. And you'll be supporting the podcast

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as well when you do this, Like we actually some

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of that some of these shirts. The money from the

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shirts will come in us and help us grow and

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reach new people with the podcast and hopefully see more lives.

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Speaker 3: If you want to know what we do with the money,

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A lot of you are here because you heard an

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advertisement yep, to come on the show. If you want

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to know where the dollars go. We we spend money

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on ads so more people can listen to.

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Speaker 2: The show, right, because we're just trying to get more

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people to just hear, follow Christ and just transform their lives.

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Speaker 1: So, by the way, the Impossible Life logo is on

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the back. Yeah, that's why I said, Oh I didn't

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hear you. I did say Pops.

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Speaker 2: Pops checks me on literally everything.

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Speaker 1: So there's strike one for Nick on this episode. We'll

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see how far we get.

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Speaker 2: We talked about strike one that was I just put

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that one out of the park. I'd already said it, man,

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but yeah, Pops. Pops is quick to correct me, and

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I'm very quick to listen because when he talks, I

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want to listen. So, okay, we're going to dive in

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now is if we haven't already what I wanted. So

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I said, like I joke around that if they were

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gonna stud people, you know, you would have a you

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could be a snub because you've got a Navy seal

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and a doctor. But I want to give you a

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little something.

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Speaker 1: Her wife did have something.

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Speaker 2: New and your wife's the level ten vnom herself like

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Darling's amazing. But this is Father's Day. We should have

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had her on for Mother's Day. There we go next

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next year. But so here here's why I want to

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surprise you with Pops. I asked, both your kids, what

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makes you such a great dad? And so I'm Brittany

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was first. So I'm gonna read Brittney's live on air.

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Speaker 3: I guarantee you our answers are going to be this.

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Speaker 1: I think.

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Speaker 2: So why I read hers and I was like, this

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is exactly what she's saying. That's why I'm doing hers

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first caause I don't want to sound like it's repetitive.

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But but here's the thing, though, Like I want you

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to fast forward. Pops is in the sixties. He's got

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his kids in their mid to late thirties. Imagine you're

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sitting there and your kids get you someone asked you, like, Hey,

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what was your dad like? How much would you wish

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and hope and pray that this is what your kids

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say about you? So this is what I said. I

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said to Brittany, I said, hey, what would you say

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makes your dad such a great dad? Because she speaks

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glowingly about you. Obviously, I'm really close to your daughter

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and her husband as well, so it's not like this

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is a random relationship. We're very close. And what she

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came back, she said, first is his consistency. He does

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what he says he will do continually. It breeds trust,

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she said. Second is integrity. He's the same person everywhere

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with everyone, and she reinforced it, she said, it breeds trust.

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She said. Three equanimity. There are less than a handful

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of times he actually raised his voice of me, not

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because it wasn't warranted, but because he chose to manage himself.

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And then four she said he's honored because he's honorable

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even if others aren't, which also speaks to the kind

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of man he is. And then in five she said,

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I don't think I know anyone as steadfast as my dad.

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She said it might be a superpower. And then she

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I said thank you, And she just came back and said,

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goat dude, if my daughters say that man like, thinking

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about that actually makes me feel pretty emotional. Think about

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my own daughters saying that about me. Yeah, very nice.

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It's incredible. But that's not contrived. So Gioski the same question,

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what makes your dad such a great dad?

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Speaker 3: Like I said, I guarantee you our answers are all

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the same. I will I won't echo all the points

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that she said, though, though I agree with all of them,

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but I will echo consistency. It really, consistency is what

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adds the value to all the other qualities that you do. Right,

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If you're nice to somebody like one time, it's like, oh,

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you know, piece of candy, right, right, But if you

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have character with someone all the time, if you maintain

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your integrity all the time. If you maintain your strength

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of character all the time, you can maintain your emotional

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resilience all the time. It gives such a different weight

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to every single thing that you do. So it's really

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the foundation of a lot of my dad's character is

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the consistency, Like he's the same person everywhere. He has

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the same emotional resilience everywhere, and as a fought like

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what you need in life as of like one of

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the I know this is what pop is going to

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talk about, so I don't want to spend too much

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time taken.

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Speaker 1: Away from it.

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Speaker 3: But consistency is one of the greatest gifts that you

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can give your children as a father, because when you

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grow up with a lack of security, then you will

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struggle with your identity, you'll struggle to make a map

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of the world, all of these things. But when you

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have a father who is the same person everywhere to

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you and to everyone else, it gives you a foundation

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to build who you are and to build your map

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of the world upon. So it's been one of the

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greatest qualities that my dad had. One thing I'll add

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that my sister didn't say is I would call it

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either selflessness or generosity.

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Speaker 1: My dad has.

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Speaker 3: Like I say, if you want to live a miserable life,

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make your life all about you. If you want to

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live a great life, make your life all about other people. Well,

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my dad's the one who demonstrated that for me. Live

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your life about other people and that's a great life.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, well there you go. Can I throw in a

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cheat code?

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Speaker 2: Of course you can.

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Speaker 1: It's gonna seem very simplistic, and you know, I try

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to be simplistic in what I say and do, so

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it's understandable. Right, Guys make things so complicated. So here's

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the cheat code. If you say what you always say,

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other words, you don't make things up. You don't have

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to remember what you made up for starters. If you

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treat everyone the same way, period, you don't have to

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wonder how you're going to act when you walk in

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a room, or you go into church, or you're going

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to a business deal. It's the same. So you're saying

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the same thing, you're doing the same thing, and you

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have a code of honor that goes along with that.

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It makes life very simple. I don't have to think

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about what I'm going to say when I walk into

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her room. Ever, I know what I'm going to say,

329
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it's the same thing I said last week, the month before,

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six months earlier, six years earlier, or twenty six years before.

331
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It's the same. And by the way, it all follows

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around the word of God. There's nothing new under the sun.

333
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You know. John Maxwell coined that a long time ago,

334
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and he said, look, everything comes from the Bible, and

335
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at least he made it popular. Other people have said it. Well.

336
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I feel that same way. And life is not super complicated.

337
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It's a very simple set of rules. Now you can

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you can find intricacies, and I love what you guys

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are on there Possible Life. By the way, I listen

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to every episode. I've heard them all. And as a father,

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it's not just because it's my son, it's because I

342
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get great and I get great wisdom out of it,

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because you can look into a matter and you can

344
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become an expert at it. But the core principles, the

345
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cheat codes are simple if you'll just follow them.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, well that kind of gives you a lot of pops.

347
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Speaker 3: And it's some you know, pops is giving some foundation

348
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or history to some of who I am and the

349
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things we talk about here. Right, What's something I say,

350
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peace doesn't come from knowing what will happen. Peace comes

351
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from knowing what you'll do. Right, Pops, Life.

352
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Speaker 1: Is way easier.

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Speaker 3: Doesn't mean you always know the answers to everything, but

354
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life's way easier when you live with consistent and consistency

355
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and integrity.

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Speaker 1: Right.

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Speaker 3: Well, you know, it may not go exactly the way

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that I think I want it to go, or that

359
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I think it should go, but I already know what

360
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I'm gonna do. I'm gonna tell the truth. I'm going

361
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to live with character. I'm going to stand on biblical principles.

362
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It takes all of the anxiety out of life when

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you can live with some faith in character.

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Speaker 2: You know, this is like such an impossible life. Things

365
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like here's the cheat code to make it easy. It's like, wow,

366
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these guys never give that. Yeah, just be consistent, always

367
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keep your word, and be the same person everywhere. Look,

368
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there we go. And like you say, it's not hard,

369
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or it's not it's not complex, it's simple, it's just

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not easy.

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Speaker 1: Well, Pastor Josh Li likes to say that you know

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that it's it's simple but not easy, And that's true.

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But you know what, it becomes easy over time, right, It.

374
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Disciplines are very interesting, and that's what I love. I mean,

375
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when I go to the range with Garrett. Look, I

376
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try not to just be totally defeated by my lack

377
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of shooting skills, but I understand that when you've put

378
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a million bullets down range, you're going to be a

379
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little better than the guy that's put a few hundred

380
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rounds or a few thousand rounds down rounds, a few

381
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thousand rounds. Yeah, and I'm a good shot, but in comparison,

382
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I'm not an expert. And so, but you can become

383
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great at anything with discipline, and that's what that's what's

384
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so beautiful about so anyway, it it's it's it's if

385
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you take your life in that picture, right, Okay, what

386
00:16:43,879 --> 00:16:46,279
are the errors that I'm not good at. Let's let's

387
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practice them over time and you become great at them,

388
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and then you don't have to think about it. He

389
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does not have to think about what he's going to

390
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do when he goes to the range.

391
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Speaker 2: No, I've watched Garrett train other men on the range

392
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and this was like postop. He had literally had a

393
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surgery and he was wrapped up, and I knew how sorry.

394
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He was because I'm around him, not because he was

395
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win Syen or anything, which is because I'm like, dude,

396
00:17:04,480 --> 00:17:06,960
this guy's still got bloody bandages on and he's training

397
00:17:07,000 --> 00:17:11,240
these guys and he's doing like like sideways shots with

398
00:17:11,240 --> 00:17:14,480
his ar just tink tink tink tink training and I'm like,

399
00:17:14,599 --> 00:17:16,880
I was like, Okay, that's impressive. It was just like

400
00:17:16,920 --> 00:17:19,359
because I know you're hurting and you're still nailed it.

401
00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:21,359
But anyways, okay, so I want to we're going to

402
00:17:21,440 --> 00:17:25,000
go into you as a man for each for I

403
00:17:25,000 --> 00:17:26,519
don't want im saying you I'm talking about the listener

404
00:17:26,519 --> 00:17:28,240
because we're going to talk about what makes a great father,

405
00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:30,640
and then we're gonna give you three things, three specific things.

406
00:17:30,960 --> 00:17:33,759
But I think it's funny how, you know, Pastor Keith

407
00:17:33,759 --> 00:17:35,920
always says that like, God didn't give you the parents

408
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that he gave you to to love you perfectly, right.

409
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He gave you to the parents you had for a

410
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reason to learn what to do, what not to do,

411
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and what to do right. I think it's so interesting

412
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that you got given the son you did knowing your temperament,

413
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because you know, we all like to be like, yeah,

414
00:17:49,160 --> 00:17:51,880
stay consistent, be calm. Yeah, no problem, I got you

415
00:17:51,880 --> 00:17:53,720
just got my kids are gonna do some stupid stuff,

416
00:17:53,759 --> 00:17:55,480
and like I'll tell them to clean their room. But

417
00:17:55,559 --> 00:17:58,400
what about whenever your kid's like a daredevil and decides

418
00:17:58,440 --> 00:18:00,440
that he wants to test the boundaries of physics all

419
00:18:00,480 --> 00:18:02,440
the time. Aka, uh, we got to go to the

420
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emergency room again.

421
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Speaker 1: That's how you say, I'm going to say something that

422
00:18:07,119 --> 00:18:09,720
most mothers aren't going to like and some dads aren't

423
00:18:09,720 --> 00:18:15,279
going to like. I encourage Garrett to be aggressive. Now.

424
00:18:15,319 --> 00:18:18,480
He took the limits farther than I might have suggested

425
00:18:18,519 --> 00:18:22,279
at times. But like, for instance, when he was a child,

426
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he would climb up in his window. It freaked Darlene

427
00:18:25,400 --> 00:18:28,240
out and she's like, she come home and Garrett's standing,

428
00:18:28,759 --> 00:18:30,920
you know in the pane of the window in the room,

429
00:18:32,119 --> 00:18:35,000
don't you. I'm going it's a couple of feet. What

430
00:18:35,279 --> 00:18:37,200
I mean, He's not going to fall out the window.

431
00:18:37,200 --> 00:18:39,880
There's a there's there's glass there. Or I'd come outside

432
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and we had I had, of course a very nice

433
00:18:41,640 --> 00:18:43,839
jungle gym. As a contractor. We had a nice jungle

434
00:18:44,079 --> 00:18:46,319
a swing. Garrett would be on top of it. Yeah,

435
00:18:46,519 --> 00:18:49,480
you know, not in the swing and and of course,

436
00:18:49,599 --> 00:18:51,880
and Darlene, She's like, he's going to hurt himself, like

437
00:18:52,279 --> 00:18:55,240
maybe you know if he does okay, you know, if

438
00:18:55,240 --> 00:18:57,160
he breaks the arm or breaks the leg. I mean,

439
00:18:57,200 --> 00:18:59,759
I think that's part of growing up. So most people

440
00:18:59,759 --> 00:19:03,119
don't have that ex but I was for him becoming

441
00:19:03,279 --> 00:19:05,519
all boy and I am that way. You see me

442
00:19:05,559 --> 00:19:08,480
with boys. I'm very hard on them physically, not like

443
00:19:08,559 --> 00:19:11,519
hard on them mad Adam. Hard on them. I push,

444
00:19:11,839 --> 00:19:14,440
I wrestle with them. I put them at headlocks, you know.

445
00:19:15,079 --> 00:19:17,640
I push them because they need to be boys. Yeah,

446
00:19:17,720 --> 00:19:22,599
And there's such a passive attitude in our society today

447
00:19:22,640 --> 00:19:23,799
that just drives me crazy.

448
00:19:23,839 --> 00:19:26,359
Speaker 3: When you think about some of the danger related to play,

449
00:19:26,400 --> 00:19:28,119
and I think about the stuff that I did.

450
00:19:28,000 --> 00:19:28,920
Speaker 1: As a young person.

451
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Speaker 3: An interesting way to conceptualize it, Like as a father

452
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and as parents, your job is to protect your children

453
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from the danger that's pursuing them. And you can put

454
00:19:39,160 --> 00:19:41,400
a lot of things in that category. But for a

455
00:19:41,440 --> 00:19:43,359
young like for you know, a seven year old, for

456
00:19:43,400 --> 00:19:46,119
a ten year old, as they start to seek some danger,

457
00:19:46,599 --> 00:19:47,200
help them.

458
00:19:47,079 --> 00:19:47,960
Speaker 1: Do it in the right way.

459
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Speaker 3: You got to protect there's all kinds of danger that's

460
00:19:50,160 --> 00:19:52,799
coming after them that they should never know about that

461
00:19:52,839 --> 00:19:54,960
they need you as a parent to protect them from.

462
00:19:55,039 --> 00:19:57,359
But also you've got to prepare your children for living

463
00:19:57,440 --> 00:19:59,960
in a dangerous world. And as they start to seek

464
00:20:00,079 --> 00:20:01,839
forms of danger, help them do it in the right way.

465
00:20:01,920 --> 00:20:04,200
Don't just say oh, well that's dangerous, don't do it.

466
00:20:04,319 --> 00:20:07,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, spiritual there's a lot of dangers that are

467
00:20:07,599 --> 00:20:10,960
way more important than physical dangers. So I'll give you

468
00:20:11,000 --> 00:20:15,880
an example with Garrett. So he got into called parkour.

469
00:20:16,119 --> 00:20:18,480
Is that the right word? They said, jumping off of

470
00:20:18,519 --> 00:20:21,720
stuff You shouldn't be jumping off of, jumping through before

471
00:20:21,720 --> 00:20:23,200
you know. You see a lot of cool stuff now

472
00:20:23,200 --> 00:20:25,799
in the movies, and uh, one of the James Bond

473
00:20:25,799 --> 00:20:28,799
movies it was dude, it was just six man anyway.

474
00:20:28,839 --> 00:20:30,880
So I watched Garrett do that kind of stuff right

475
00:20:31,440 --> 00:20:33,920
and climb, you know, rock climb and do all the things.

476
00:20:34,319 --> 00:20:36,119
And I remember one time he was telling me he

477
00:20:36,160 --> 00:20:37,880
was going to do something, and it was they were

478
00:20:37,960 --> 00:20:41,720
jumping off the second story of some parking garage. And

479
00:20:41,759 --> 00:20:43,400
here's what I said to him. I remember saying it

480
00:20:43,440 --> 00:20:46,720
to him. I said, look, I know you've been practicing,

481
00:20:47,000 --> 00:20:49,759
you've you've gotten you know, how to fall and roll

482
00:20:49,799 --> 00:20:51,960
and do all those things. I said, but your body

483
00:20:52,000 --> 00:20:54,400
has a limit, I said, I need you to at

484
00:20:54,519 --> 00:20:57,200
least understand that. Don't be jumping off things that your

485
00:20:57,279 --> 00:20:59,279
legs are going to break when you hit the ground.

486
00:20:59,599 --> 00:21:01,519
That's a sactly what I said to him. I didn't

487
00:21:01,519 --> 00:21:04,079
say what. I knew he was going to do it, right,

488
00:21:04,240 --> 00:21:06,559
I mean he was. He had trained for it. You start,

489
00:21:06,640 --> 00:21:09,000
you jump off of a five foot wall and then

490
00:21:09,480 --> 00:21:11,200
you work your way up. Now he's jumping off twenty

491
00:21:11,279 --> 00:21:15,079
feet and so, and he could do it well. And

492
00:21:15,160 --> 00:21:18,680
I'd see the video, you know. But so when he

493
00:21:18,759 --> 00:21:21,039
was jumping off doing a backflip off the top of

494
00:21:21,079 --> 00:21:23,720
a semi for youth into the sand pit, it didn't

495
00:21:23,759 --> 00:21:26,000
freak me out because that's not even high compared to

496
00:21:26,000 --> 00:21:28,200
what I've seen him jump off of, right, right, So

497
00:21:28,319 --> 00:21:31,359
you know it's all relative. But I mean I did care,

498
00:21:32,119 --> 00:21:35,319
but I knew what his abilities were. You know. So

499
00:21:35,720 --> 00:21:39,680
when when I what helped me here, my dad, It

500
00:21:39,880 --> 00:21:41,440
isn't to throw my mom under a bus.

501
00:21:41,759 --> 00:21:44,279
Speaker 3: What helped me here my dad is when my mom

502
00:21:44,279 --> 00:21:46,160
would speak about it or other people would speak about it,

503
00:21:46,200 --> 00:21:47,799
I could tell it's like you don't see through the

504
00:21:47,799 --> 00:21:50,480
same eyes I see through. Right, you're talking when you're

505
00:21:50,480 --> 00:21:52,559
talking to me about this, like you're scared to jump

506
00:21:52,559 --> 00:21:54,839
off something six feet high. I don't care for what

507
00:21:54,880 --> 00:21:57,000
you have to say. Right when my dad would talk

508
00:21:57,000 --> 00:21:59,839
to me about it, is what I could tell that

509
00:21:59,880 --> 00:22:03,400
the or wasn't because what I was pushing against was

510
00:22:03,480 --> 00:22:06,720
things that scare me. And when I heard my dad

511
00:22:06,759 --> 00:22:08,519
talk to me about it, the fact that he wasn't

512
00:22:08,519 --> 00:22:10,440
afraid but was just trying to give like, hey, you

513
00:22:10,440 --> 00:22:13,640
should at least consider this. I could hear him right,

514
00:22:13,799 --> 00:22:15,759
but you know how I am, And so imagine me

515
00:22:15,799 --> 00:22:17,799
at twelve people who like had fear in the voice,

516
00:22:17,920 --> 00:22:19,960
was like, I don't have your dad, I have nothing

517
00:22:20,000 --> 00:22:21,200
to listen to you about.

518
00:22:21,359 --> 00:22:24,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm glad it's been a consistent characteristic.

519
00:22:24,480 --> 00:22:27,440
Speaker 1: That was a father son discussion. It wasn't a family

520
00:22:27,480 --> 00:22:30,599
meeting discussion. It was just me and him talking. Yeah,

521
00:22:30,640 --> 00:22:34,640
and you know, encourage him to not hurt himself.

522
00:22:34,720 --> 00:22:37,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, okay. So one of the stated desires that

523
00:22:37,000 --> 00:22:39,400
I have for this because it's been a blessing to me,

524
00:22:39,440 --> 00:22:41,079
and I always kind of think about the things that

525
00:22:41,119 --> 00:22:42,839
have really helped me, and I try and give that

526
00:22:42,839 --> 00:22:45,880
to as many people as possible. And I have a

527
00:22:45,880 --> 00:22:49,279
great dad, so I'm very fortunate there. And I will say, we.

528
00:22:49,279 --> 00:22:50,279
Speaker 1: Love your dad, Yeah, we do.

529
00:22:50,359 --> 00:22:52,079
Speaker 2: I love my dad, love Bubby. He's done so many

530
00:22:52,079 --> 00:22:54,440
great things. But even seeing the relationship you guys have,

531
00:22:54,559 --> 00:22:56,440
I feel like I've gained even more. And my dad

532
00:22:56,559 --> 00:22:58,279
is so humbles He's told me, he's like, man, I'm

533
00:22:58,279 --> 00:22:59,920
so glad that you get to be around them, because

534
00:23:00,279 --> 00:23:02,559
I know that you get things that I just never

535
00:23:02,599 --> 00:23:04,359
had myself and didn't know to give to you. But

536
00:23:04,359 --> 00:23:06,039
I think it's a very humble thing to say as

537
00:23:06,039 --> 00:23:08,119
a father. There's no pride, like, well what do you

538
00:23:08,119 --> 00:23:09,839
do with those uncle blocks? Like my dad loves that

539
00:23:09,880 --> 00:23:11,400
I get to be around you guys the way I do.

540
00:23:11,880 --> 00:23:13,519
But I know for a lot of people out there,

541
00:23:14,039 --> 00:23:16,480
even guys close in our circles, like they don't have

542
00:23:16,559 --> 00:23:19,839
a great father role model, and it's it's so like

543
00:23:20,319 --> 00:23:23,160
it's such an unfortunate thing that we don't have great

544
00:23:23,200 --> 00:23:25,599
father role models, and even the ones that are on

545
00:23:25,640 --> 00:23:28,559
TV in society, it's like men are portrayed as bumbling

546
00:23:28,599 --> 00:23:31,000
idiots and then unfortunately for most guys, when they look

547
00:23:31,039 --> 00:23:33,119
at their dad. It's like a good dad means he

548
00:23:33,160 --> 00:23:35,400
didn't really screw things up too bad, Like he went

549
00:23:35,440 --> 00:23:38,319
to work every day, you know, was at your games

550
00:23:38,599 --> 00:23:40,279
and sort of you know, didn't beat you like.

551
00:23:40,319 --> 00:23:42,440
Speaker 1: You know, we talk about this concept.

552
00:23:42,480 --> 00:23:45,279
Speaker 3: We did this what maybe ten episodes ago of be

553
00:23:45,400 --> 00:23:48,000
the one yes, right, and Pops, you had to do

554
00:23:48,039 --> 00:23:51,359
this with your dad. You know, your dad wasn't my

555
00:23:51,559 --> 00:23:54,319
you know, the grandpa that I remember was not the

556
00:23:54,400 --> 00:23:56,799
dad that you had, and you had to I don't

557
00:23:56,799 --> 00:23:58,759
know if you remember that episode from like ten episodes

558
00:23:58,759 --> 00:24:00,240
ago where were talking about be the one like you,

559
00:24:00,359 --> 00:24:02,240
to be the one who makes change in your family.

560
00:24:02,960 --> 00:24:04,319
You know, no one did this for me, but I'm

561
00:24:04,319 --> 00:24:06,440
going to do it for my family. What was your

562
00:24:06,480 --> 00:24:09,799
thought process mindset around that of you know, you didn't

563
00:24:09,839 --> 00:24:12,599
have the dad that who the grandpa I remember, you

564
00:24:12,599 --> 00:24:14,079
didn't have a dad like who you are to me?

565
00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:17,279
Speaker 1: What was your thought process there? Yeah, and I'll tell

566
00:24:17,319 --> 00:24:21,240
a story after I answer your question. So most people

567
00:24:21,279 --> 00:24:24,240
would think when you have the family that we have,

568
00:24:24,799 --> 00:24:26,240
you would say, oh, he must have had a really

569
00:24:26,279 --> 00:24:29,480
good dad. Yeah, well I didn't. Matter of fact, I

570
00:24:29,480 --> 00:24:32,960
hated my dad and I remember at the age of fourteen,

571
00:24:33,039 --> 00:24:36,759
standing in front of him, yelling at him at whatever

572
00:24:36,839 --> 00:24:39,200
that meant to be yelling at your father. I wasn't

573
00:24:39,240 --> 00:24:41,599
out of control, but I was very adamant and said,

574
00:24:42,200 --> 00:24:45,319
I hate you. You don't care about me. You've never

575
00:24:45,359 --> 00:24:48,119
even seen me play a game ever, as far as

576
00:24:48,160 --> 00:24:50,400
I know, until I was a senior in high school,

577
00:24:50,440 --> 00:24:53,279
my father never saw me play again any sporting event.

578
00:24:53,680 --> 00:24:56,279
Real mother would show up. He never came, which what

579
00:24:56,400 --> 00:25:00,960
important to him, right? But God, he got saved when

580
00:25:01,000 --> 00:25:06,039
I was twelve, and by the time eighteen or nineteen,

581
00:25:06,039 --> 00:25:09,200
my dad became very passionate about the Lord, and I

582
00:25:09,319 --> 00:25:12,960
became passionate about the Lord when I met Pastor Keith,

583
00:25:13,640 --> 00:25:18,000
and then our relationship started building from that point. And

584
00:25:18,079 --> 00:25:22,960
that's the Garrett Garrett knows my father post him really

585
00:25:23,119 --> 00:25:26,319
not being a good human being, right, And which is

586
00:25:26,359 --> 00:25:29,400
great those memories. What decade of his life, he was

587
00:25:29,480 --> 00:25:32,480
just on fire for the Word percent He truly was

588
00:25:32,519 --> 00:25:36,720
an apostle and a prophet. But he dedicated his life

589
00:25:36,759 --> 00:25:39,240
to the Word of God and read it continually pretty

590
00:25:39,279 --> 00:25:43,279
much best I could tell, and did his business simultaneous.

591
00:25:43,359 --> 00:25:45,920
Became a great man of God. But that so we

592
00:25:45,960 --> 00:25:49,640
became friends. But I never had passionate emotions from my

593
00:25:49,720 --> 00:25:52,480
father because we didn't have those early years. When my

594
00:25:52,559 --> 00:25:55,680
father passed, I missed him and I was. He died

595
00:25:55,799 --> 00:25:58,599
very early, sixty three years old from brain aneurism, and

596
00:25:58,680 --> 00:26:00,920
I hated that he was gone because we had become friends.

597
00:26:01,519 --> 00:26:04,920
But I wasn't. It wasn't like when my mom passed.

598
00:26:04,960 --> 00:26:08,759
I didn't have those same motions because we had no

599
00:26:08,920 --> 00:26:12,480
endearing childhood at all. So people think, oh, well, you

600
00:26:12,519 --> 00:26:14,160
had a great father, but no, I didn't. I knew

601
00:26:14,200 --> 00:26:17,400
what I didn't want, so I used my dad. I was.

602
00:26:17,480 --> 00:26:20,759
I was always confident child, and I was left to

603
00:26:20,799 --> 00:26:24,960
my own, my own doing a lot. And my dad

604
00:26:25,000 --> 00:26:27,720
gave me one great piece of advice growing up. He said,

605
00:26:27,759 --> 00:26:30,519
you no longer have an allowance. This was eleven or twelve.

606
00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:32,920
He said, there's a mower in the garage you're welcome

607
00:26:32,960 --> 00:26:35,720
to use, but remember it's my mower. You better take

608
00:26:35,759 --> 00:26:37,960
care of it. He didn't offer me gas, money to

609
00:26:38,039 --> 00:26:40,880
put in it, or anything that sounds like you. Yeah,

610
00:26:40,960 --> 00:26:43,559
And so you know what I did. I got the mower.

611
00:26:43,640 --> 00:26:46,480
I didn't complain. I started knocking on doors and I

612
00:26:46,519 --> 00:26:49,920
became an entrepreneur. And so he did that. That was

613
00:26:50,279 --> 00:26:53,640
I credit him to that. But my point in saying

614
00:26:53,680 --> 00:26:56,039
all that is is, you know, I heard so many

615
00:26:56,039 --> 00:26:58,799
people just wanting and this. I don't mean to beat

616
00:26:58,799 --> 00:27:02,319
people down, but not blaming your father for your issues. Yeah,

617
00:27:02,359 --> 00:27:06,319
you're a man. I didn't have a good father. I

618
00:27:06,400 --> 00:27:10,720
had a great grandfather from my kids. But I met

619
00:27:10,720 --> 00:27:13,119
a guy that was hard after God, and that's Pastor Keith.

620
00:27:13,920 --> 00:27:16,359
And he was the guy I modeled myself after. He

621
00:27:16,400 --> 00:27:20,160
was a very strong guy, very athletic, and he said, Okay,

622
00:27:20,200 --> 00:27:22,839
that's a guy that I can follow. And so it

623
00:27:23,000 --> 00:27:25,480
turned out that we've now are lifelong friends and we

624
00:27:25,559 --> 00:27:28,440
raised our children together. So we I watched what he

625
00:27:28,480 --> 00:27:32,160
did and I watched what I didn't want from my father,

626
00:27:32,440 --> 00:27:36,680
and that developed a very intentional strategy to raise our kids.

627
00:27:36,839 --> 00:27:39,079
Speaker 2: And that and that's vision. We talk about that so much.

628
00:27:39,119 --> 00:27:41,359
And I think that that, to me is what why

629
00:27:41,359 --> 00:27:43,119
I wanted to bring up about how many, how so

630
00:27:43,240 --> 00:27:45,680
few people have a real example of what a great

631
00:27:45,720 --> 00:27:48,680
father looks like. Because you have an idea of what

632
00:27:48,720 --> 00:27:50,279
you think you should be as a father, whether you

633
00:27:50,279 --> 00:27:52,880
could clearly state it or not, and if you if

634
00:27:52,880 --> 00:27:55,680
you don't have a real intentional vision. Chances are you're

635
00:27:55,720 --> 00:27:58,000
just going to repeat what was what you saw around

636
00:27:58,039 --> 00:28:01,319
you and hopefully you'll improve on. But that's not necessarily

637
00:28:01,359 --> 00:28:01,720
the case.

638
00:28:01,920 --> 00:28:04,160
Speaker 1: Some people do exactly the same thing. It just becomes

639
00:28:04,160 --> 00:28:09,920
a continual failure in their families of bad parenting and divorce.

640
00:28:10,720 --> 00:28:13,240
And because they're doing what the previous generation did.

641
00:28:13,359 --> 00:28:15,680
Speaker 2: Yeah, and so you did the opposite with the opposite,

642
00:28:15,759 --> 00:28:17,319
And I hope that's an encouragement for people if you

643
00:28:17,359 --> 00:28:19,160
didn't have a great father, which unfortunate, I feel like

644
00:28:19,160 --> 00:28:21,359
that's probably gonna be a high percentage of people like

645
00:28:22,000 --> 00:28:24,240
you can do the opposite. And I want to encourage

646
00:28:24,240 --> 00:28:25,960
hoping you like you're gonna get some great tips here,

647
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:27,200
but you can do the opposite.

648
00:28:27,279 --> 00:28:31,240
Speaker 1: Well, fifty percent of marriages and a divorce, and unfortunately,

649
00:28:31,319 --> 00:28:33,680
if you're a Christian, it's it's lower than that by

650
00:28:33,839 --> 00:28:37,039
quite a bit if you have if you have faith

651
00:28:37,039 --> 00:28:39,920
in the Lord. But so that being the case, you've

652
00:28:39,920 --> 00:28:44,519
added the complication of a divorce, which sometimes is bitter,

653
00:28:45,000 --> 00:28:47,920
and so now you don't have consistency in the kids,

654
00:28:48,079 --> 00:28:50,839
you know, being with the kids and communication wise, and

655
00:28:50,920 --> 00:28:54,480
so it adds so the reason so many people don't

656
00:28:54,480 --> 00:28:56,599
have a good father. Part of it is just because

657
00:28:56,599 --> 00:28:57,799
mom and dad couldn't get along.

658
00:28:58,039 --> 00:28:59,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, and that, yeah, that hits hard.

659
00:29:00,039 --> 00:29:03,559
Speaker 3: You got to, I mean, and Pops has some good

660
00:29:03,559 --> 00:29:07,599
wisdom on this. But I'll say this to the fathers

661
00:29:07,640 --> 00:29:10,519
that are my age, and you can speak to maybe

662
00:29:10,559 --> 00:29:13,440
people who've missed it. But it's the same in every

663
00:29:13,440 --> 00:29:15,680
area of life. And it was this way in business,

664
00:29:15,759 --> 00:29:18,279
it was this way in the military, and this way

665
00:29:18,319 --> 00:29:20,960
as a father, your credibility is so hard to build

666
00:29:21,000 --> 00:29:21,440
him very.

667
00:29:21,359 --> 00:29:22,240
Speaker 1: Easy to give away.

668
00:29:22,720 --> 00:29:24,680
Speaker 3: And when you do things like you can't keep your

669
00:29:24,680 --> 00:29:27,359
marriage together or you can't keep your integrity as a father,

670
00:29:27,839 --> 00:29:29,559
you beat up a lot of the foundation you have

671
00:29:29,640 --> 00:29:32,720
for trying to teach your children the truth. The reason

672
00:29:33,119 --> 00:29:35,079
I had the strength that I had, the identity I

673
00:29:35,079 --> 00:29:37,200
had where those of you who know my story who've

674
00:29:37,200 --> 00:29:39,279
listened to a lot of the episodes where I went

675
00:29:39,319 --> 00:29:41,799
into seal training, and people are saying, you're not this,

676
00:29:41,960 --> 00:29:44,359
you're not that, And I was like, well, my dad

677
00:29:44,359 --> 00:29:46,039
knows me better than you do, and I trust him

678
00:29:46,079 --> 00:29:48,960
more than what you're saying. If I hadn't watched my

679
00:29:49,039 --> 00:29:52,000
dad be who he was, if my dad didn't have

680
00:29:52,039 --> 00:29:54,160
the power of his word of hey, I do what

681
00:29:54,240 --> 00:29:57,039
I say. I wouldn't have been able to say put

682
00:29:57,039 --> 00:29:59,519
more value on my dad's word than on their word,

683
00:30:00,000 --> 00:30:02,200
because I had seen my dad build the value of

684
00:30:02,200 --> 00:30:03,720
his own word. I am who I am, I do

685
00:30:03,799 --> 00:30:06,000
what I say. And then when my father told me

686
00:30:06,039 --> 00:30:08,119
who I am, that's where I could go to other

687
00:30:08,160 --> 00:30:11,400
people who you know, maybe had credibility in that moment,

688
00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:12,880
but I could say, you know, I trust my dad

689
00:30:12,920 --> 00:30:13,799
more than I trust you.

690
00:30:14,279 --> 00:30:14,599
Speaker 1: Yeah.

691
00:30:14,880 --> 00:30:18,759
Speaker 2: Now, what an amazing gift you gave Garrett. I always

692
00:30:18,759 --> 00:30:20,559
say to people, Garrett has the strongest sense of identity

693
00:30:20,559 --> 00:30:24,079
of anybody I've ever met, bar none. And you, like,

694
00:30:24,119 --> 00:30:26,640
it's a father's role to speak identity in kids. And

695
00:30:26,680 --> 00:30:29,079
I've copied this from you, guys, because, like I said,

696
00:30:29,119 --> 00:30:30,160
I get to be close to you guys, so I

697
00:30:30,160 --> 00:30:33,079
steal all the best stuff. And you nicknamed your kids

698
00:30:33,119 --> 00:30:36,119
like Garret's nickname was Champion, and you're speaking into the

699
00:30:36,160 --> 00:30:36,920
best part of them.

700
00:30:37,359 --> 00:30:41,000
Speaker 1: Well, it's funny, you know. I did some things that

701
00:30:41,160 --> 00:30:43,400
I'd like to tell you that I learned all this

702
00:30:43,519 --> 00:30:46,880
great wisdom from personal growth and development. A personal growth

703
00:30:46,920 --> 00:30:47,680
and development was.

704
00:30:47,720 --> 00:30:50,759
Speaker 3: Just getting rolling my mom Mom was the reader. You

705
00:30:50,799 --> 00:30:53,920
were too busy doing stuff. I mean, you didn't correct

706
00:30:53,960 --> 00:30:55,400
me if I'm wrong here, But as far as I know,

707
00:30:55,519 --> 00:30:58,200
you never read a psychology book or a parenting book

708
00:30:58,319 --> 00:31:00,000
or a mindset book when we were children.

709
00:31:00,160 --> 00:31:00,200
Speaker 2: No.

710
00:31:00,359 --> 00:31:04,039
Speaker 1: I read them after that, and we called Mom the librarian.

711
00:31:04,079 --> 00:31:06,079
Before she was the health gurer that she is now,

712
00:31:06,519 --> 00:31:08,599
she was she was the librarian, which is why she

713
00:31:08,640 --> 00:31:11,920
became the health greer, right, but she we have thousands

714
00:31:11,920 --> 00:31:15,920
of books, and I'm always been a reader, and I

715
00:31:15,960 --> 00:31:17,839
do read, but at that point in my life, I

716
00:31:17,920 --> 00:31:21,160
was reading like how to Conquer Business, you know that

717
00:31:21,160 --> 00:31:22,319
that sort of stuff. I think.

718
00:31:22,359 --> 00:31:25,200
Speaker 2: I think Darlean's what technically they call her wicked smat

719
00:31:25,359 --> 00:31:26,039
up in Boston.

720
00:31:26,599 --> 00:31:28,839
Speaker 1: Yeah, But what I wanted to I want to say

721
00:31:28,839 --> 00:31:31,799
about that is, Look, one of the things that I

722
00:31:31,880 --> 00:31:36,200
pride myself in is consistency. And now that's looking back.

723
00:31:36,279 --> 00:31:39,359
When I was becoming consistent, I didn't have in my

724
00:31:39,400 --> 00:31:42,000
mind I'm going to be the most consistent dude. I

725
00:31:42,480 --> 00:31:45,359
had one of our close and friends gave me a

726
00:31:45,400 --> 00:31:48,160
coffee cup. Yes, mister consistent on it. It cracked me out.

727
00:31:49,400 --> 00:31:52,720
I appreciate that I'm not patting myself on the back.

728
00:31:52,759 --> 00:31:55,720
That's how somebody else sees me, and so I respect that.

729
00:31:55,799 --> 00:31:59,319
But what what I want to say is by doing

730
00:31:59,359 --> 00:32:03,279
things consist since the like going to church, they've become absolute.

731
00:32:03,400 --> 00:32:05,200
I'm going to read my Bible. I've been reading my

732
00:32:05,240 --> 00:32:08,720
Bible now for forty three years. For the last ten

733
00:32:08,759 --> 00:32:12,400
and probably ten to fifteen years, I've been very deep

734
00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:15,240
in it. Before it was just I know I need

735
00:32:15,240 --> 00:32:18,400
to read my Bible, right, and so I just developed

736
00:32:18,440 --> 00:32:22,519
the cadence of doing it. Darling and I were talking

737
00:32:22,519 --> 00:32:25,599
in this last weekend. We took a trip just to

738
00:32:25,640 --> 00:32:27,920
be together. We did some things she wanted to do,

739
00:32:28,160 --> 00:32:30,759
which I think is important. We do things I want

740
00:32:30,799 --> 00:32:32,200
to do, and we do things she wanted to do.

741
00:32:32,720 --> 00:32:34,400
But we were talking because we were on the road,

742
00:32:34,559 --> 00:32:37,720
on the road quite a bit about affairs, because we've

743
00:32:38,200 --> 00:32:40,440
seen some people destroy their lives, and we were talking

744
00:32:40,440 --> 00:32:43,240
about a specific couple, and she said, you know, I

745
00:32:43,359 --> 00:32:47,480
never I never had a thought in my mind that

746
00:32:47,519 --> 00:32:51,200
you were not being faithful to me. Ever. And I said, sweetheart,

747
00:32:51,279 --> 00:32:53,720
just so you know, I never put myself in a

748
00:32:53,759 --> 00:32:57,759
position ever. One time. I didn't allow it to happen.

749
00:32:58,200 --> 00:33:00,279
It's not that I'm this great looking guy. But I

750
00:33:00,319 --> 00:33:04,039
have I had some measure of success. I've had, you know,

751
00:33:04,160 --> 00:33:07,359
the fast cars and the nice homes and all those

752
00:33:07,400 --> 00:33:11,160
things that might be attractive to a female. I've never

753
00:33:11,599 --> 00:33:17,680
allowed myself to go to that place, not for a minute.

754
00:33:18,119 --> 00:33:20,680
Not that I haven't seen a beautiful woman and said,

755
00:33:20,720 --> 00:33:24,279
oh wow, that's a beautiful woman, and not that. It's

756
00:33:24,319 --> 00:33:26,920
what's funny is Darlene and I at this point we

757
00:33:26,920 --> 00:33:29,759
we see it together like and I'll say, you know,

758
00:33:29,920 --> 00:33:33,519
that is an attractive woman. Man, that that's impressive, you know,

759
00:33:34,039 --> 00:33:37,039
but but but end of story. But end of story. Yeah,

760
00:33:37,279 --> 00:33:40,319
it does go on. And so now after we've been

761
00:33:40,359 --> 00:33:44,640
together forty two years, that's that's impressive, right, That's a story.

762
00:33:44,680 --> 00:33:47,400
That's a that's a bedrock that you can stand on.

763
00:33:47,519 --> 00:33:51,279
But it didn't start that way. I mean it was

764
00:33:51,960 --> 00:33:57,640
one time, you know, every time it came up, I

765
00:33:57,680 --> 00:34:00,400
made sure I went the other direction. I ever put

766
00:34:00,400 --> 00:34:04,039
myself on a compromising spot. And now I can look

767
00:34:04,079 --> 00:34:06,680
back and I see that, and now I'm now I

768
00:34:06,680 --> 00:34:09,119
have consistency in that space. But you just do it

769
00:34:09,280 --> 00:34:12,320
one one at a time. Yeah, one hurdle lot of time,

770
00:34:12,760 --> 00:34:16,800
one battle lot of time. Everybody's battles different, right, and

771
00:34:16,880 --> 00:34:19,239
now I have I have mastery over that. I'm not

772
00:34:19,760 --> 00:34:22,199
it's not gonna happen. Not worried about it, you know

773
00:34:22,239 --> 00:34:24,920
what I mean, It's never gonna happen. My kids are

774
00:34:24,960 --> 00:34:28,599
never gonna have to say what the heck was dad doing? Yeah,

775
00:34:28,760 --> 00:34:29,880
you know I.

776
00:34:29,840 --> 00:34:31,360
Speaker 2: Want to I want to go back to just before

777
00:34:31,400 --> 00:34:34,000
that though, because I appreciate you saying that, because that's

778
00:34:34,039 --> 00:34:36,360
like just such a great bonus nugget about fleeing, you know,

779
00:34:36,559 --> 00:34:38,440
like you've said on the podcast before, it's the only

780
00:34:38,519 --> 00:34:40,519
thing the Bible ward says, to flee. Like so many

781
00:34:40,559 --> 00:34:42,719
times we're told to fight, but it's like flea lust

782
00:34:44,119 --> 00:34:48,039
socially another way. Yeah, with with the with speaking identity

783
00:34:48,079 --> 00:34:49,440
in to the kids, because like I, like I said,

784
00:34:49,480 --> 00:34:52,199
I stole that from you. Yeah, Like I talk me

785
00:34:52,199 --> 00:34:54,039
through that. How did you, like, how did you even

786
00:34:54,079 --> 00:34:55,079
decide what to call them?

787
00:34:55,159 --> 00:34:57,960
Speaker 1: Yeah, it just can't comes naturally. I wanted I wanted

788
00:34:58,000 --> 00:34:59,480
Garrett to be a winner, and he was a very

789
00:34:59,480 --> 00:35:04,039
good apple, but he was he ha was some three. Well,

790
00:35:04,199 --> 00:35:05,880
I mean, when you are you are. You can be

791
00:35:05,880 --> 00:35:08,840
an athlete or you can be an athlete and if

792
00:35:08,840 --> 00:35:11,840
you're an athlete, it needs to be drawn out a little. Okay,

793
00:35:11,920 --> 00:35:14,079
we were with the pro the Pross last weekend. We

794
00:35:14,159 --> 00:35:15,480
got a real kick out of it. Yeah, they got

795
00:35:15,519 --> 00:35:19,199
to kick out of it too. It's very funny. But anyway, I.

796
00:35:19,159 --> 00:35:22,800
Speaker 3: Wasn't supposed to be an athlete, but I did have.

797
00:35:23,280 --> 00:35:24,920
What I had that made me stand out when I

798
00:35:24,960 --> 00:35:27,079
was younger was a lot of aggression, which as a

799
00:35:27,119 --> 00:35:29,000
young person, like I was a ten out of ten

800
00:35:29,480 --> 00:35:32,119
as for aggression as a young person. And that'll make

801
00:35:32,159 --> 00:35:34,079
you look like a better athlete than you are when

802
00:35:34,079 --> 00:35:36,239
you're young. And then you get some training and you

803
00:35:36,280 --> 00:35:37,599
get more opportunities.

804
00:35:37,960 --> 00:35:38,480
Speaker 1: And I didn't have.

805
00:35:38,519 --> 00:35:40,360
Speaker 3: I don't have the genetic gifts of some of these

806
00:35:40,360 --> 00:35:43,039
other athletes, right, Pops.

807
00:35:42,840 --> 00:35:45,719
Speaker 1: Is referring to I got to tell one funny story. Yeah,

808
00:35:45,920 --> 00:35:48,719
so we were so we were We were in pee

809
00:35:48,719 --> 00:35:53,639
wee football, this boys club, and I think Garrett might

810
00:35:53,679 --> 00:35:57,760
have been nine or ten. He wasn't a big kid

811
00:35:57,840 --> 00:36:00,800
at that time. He grew, he got strong and grew,

812
00:36:01,159 --> 00:36:04,800
you know, in his in his high school years. There

813
00:36:04,880 --> 00:36:06,840
was a there was a kid on the other team

814
00:36:07,519 --> 00:36:09,880
and he had to be two hundred plus.

815
00:36:10,119 --> 00:36:13,159
Speaker 2: What no kids at nine years old.

816
00:36:13,400 --> 00:36:16,719
Speaker 1: Yes, he was a giant kids. We all we want

817
00:36:16,719 --> 00:36:19,039
to see the birth certificate. Is this kid legit? When

818
00:36:19,039 --> 00:36:21,000
we got close Tram, you know, he had a little

819
00:36:21,000 --> 00:36:23,960
baby face. This was this was sixth grade. Sixth grade,

820
00:36:25,039 --> 00:36:27,559
I remember, and I remember. I mean, Garrett was a

821
00:36:27,639 --> 00:36:30,679
human missile in football. He would hurt you. I mean

822
00:36:31,039 --> 00:36:34,000
he gave everything he had. And I remember one time

823
00:36:34,079 --> 00:36:35,480
this they put this kid in it.

824
00:36:35,719 --> 00:36:39,039
Speaker 3: He had taught me in baseball sacrifice like we played,

825
00:36:39,079 --> 00:36:41,400
he was my baseball coach growing up, and like to

826
00:36:41,480 --> 00:36:43,639
catch the ball. They would say, sacrifice your body, right,

827
00:36:43,880 --> 00:36:45,400
like dive out for the black. Do what you gotta do,

828
00:36:45,480 --> 00:36:47,480
like you just get your get your body in front

829
00:36:47,480 --> 00:36:49,599
of the ball, like, sacrifice your body catch the ball.

830
00:36:49,760 --> 00:36:51,239
Well I took I thought, I was like that's a

831
00:36:51,239 --> 00:36:52,960
great mentality. I just took that to football.

832
00:36:52,960 --> 00:36:57,000
Speaker 1: That's so. I think they passed the rule after this

833
00:36:57,079 --> 00:36:59,039
kid that you couldn't run the ball if you were

834
00:36:59,079 --> 00:37:02,440
a certain weight, because it was crazy. But they put

835
00:37:02,440 --> 00:37:04,679
this kid in it running. Yeah, pretty much, I stop down.

836
00:37:04,960 --> 00:37:07,000
He was so slow, but he was you know, just

837
00:37:07,199 --> 00:37:09,639
it's like trying to stop in eighteen week. But I

838
00:37:09,719 --> 00:37:12,079
wish we had video cameras like we have now. You know,

839
00:37:12,159 --> 00:37:14,039
by then you had to have the big camera if

840
00:37:14,079 --> 00:37:16,440
you want to do it. But Garrett Tack goes to

841
00:37:16,480 --> 00:37:19,239
tackle this guy and was holding on to him, and

842
00:37:19,280 --> 00:37:21,480
this kid is dragging him. I would hit him and

843
00:37:21,480 --> 00:37:23,400
wrap him up, but I just couldn't bring him down. Yeah,

844
00:37:23,480 --> 00:37:27,119
he's just dragging him down the sidelines. It was so hilarious.

845
00:37:27,480 --> 00:37:30,519
But he would not let go. He I would like it.

846
00:37:30,599 --> 00:37:33,079
I mean, yeah, oh, finally, you know, six or seven

847
00:37:33,159 --> 00:37:35,559
guys would get there and take it. Take three of

848
00:37:35,639 --> 00:37:40,320
us have to take him down anyway. So back to

849
00:37:40,360 --> 00:37:41,840
the story, I had to throw that. It was it

850
00:37:41,880 --> 00:37:43,920
just popped in my head. I can still have the

851
00:37:44,000 --> 00:37:48,320
visual on my head anyway. So I wanted Gearrett to

852
00:37:48,320 --> 00:37:50,039
be a winner, right so, and he was. It was

853
00:37:50,039 --> 00:37:52,079
a good athlete. But I wanted him to think champion.

854
00:37:52,119 --> 00:37:54,440
So I just called us to your champion. I never

855
00:37:54,519 --> 00:37:57,760
called I don't think my children correct me if I'm wrong,

856
00:37:57,800 --> 00:38:00,199
but I don't and I called I never called them

857
00:38:00,239 --> 00:38:03,800
stupid or idiot or I didn't allow my emotions to

858
00:38:03,920 --> 00:38:06,599
when I was very frustrated with them, right uh to

859
00:38:06,599 --> 00:38:08,760
get in the way. So I said champion and it

860
00:38:08,760 --> 00:38:11,840
becomes a default, right, so then he's the champion. With

861
00:38:11,840 --> 00:38:15,559
With Brittany, she was Sunshine and she's always been sunshine,

862
00:38:15,559 --> 00:38:19,320
and she's still sunshine. And now she's you know, she's

863
00:38:19,360 --> 00:38:23,360
the smartest uncle back. I would probably say Garrett's uh,

864
00:38:23,719 --> 00:38:26,960
super smart in certain areas. And and and Brittany is

865
00:38:26,960 --> 00:38:29,360
a is a learned she went and became a doctor,

866
00:38:29,519 --> 00:38:33,519
learned doctor, learning doctor. I mean she's pretty well yeah,

867
00:38:33,760 --> 00:38:37,880
well the same for me. So, but my point is is,

868
00:38:38,000 --> 00:38:40,679
so I've I found names to call them that were

869
00:38:40,760 --> 00:38:43,960
encouraging to them. Again, I didn't have that. Nobody had

870
00:38:44,000 --> 00:38:47,119
that wasn't taught. It was just something I didn't want

871
00:38:47,199 --> 00:38:49,880
to be the meaning to them, right, And so that

872
00:38:50,079 --> 00:38:53,599
was the But but Pastor Keith and their family that

873
00:38:53,719 --> 00:38:56,440
he had names, he had Pastor Keys have names for everybody.

874
00:38:57,000 --> 00:39:00,280
And so I probably by osmosis because we're rare her

875
00:39:00,360 --> 00:39:03,840
kids exact same age together, that I got some of

876
00:39:03,880 --> 00:39:07,639
that from him. As far as what's a positive way

877
00:39:07,840 --> 00:39:11,119
to speak into your kids, Yeah, you know, instead of

878
00:39:11,159 --> 00:39:16,679
a negative adjective whatever it is that they're doing well.

879
00:39:16,719 --> 00:39:18,760
Speaker 2: It's such a simple thing because so many people give

880
00:39:18,800 --> 00:39:21,679
their kids names that the kid either doesn't know the meaning.

881
00:39:22,079 --> 00:39:23,679
All my kids know the meaning of their names because

882
00:39:23,679 --> 00:39:25,639
they were very intentional. So I remind them what their

883
00:39:25,679 --> 00:39:27,880
name means to speak identity to them. But I've given

884
00:39:27,920 --> 00:39:31,119
them nicknames based off of just the best parts, like

885
00:39:31,119 --> 00:39:33,519
the strengths I see in them. And Garrett had like

886
00:39:33,719 --> 00:39:36,639
a championship mentality in his mind from a young age.

887
00:39:36,880 --> 00:39:39,719
And Britt is very warm and loving, like extremely if

888
00:39:39,760 --> 00:39:43,760
you think about identity development in young children the same

889
00:39:43,760 --> 00:39:45,400
way like where I talk about what I went through

890
00:39:45,400 --> 00:39:47,519
and still training, where I was looking back at what

891
00:39:47,559 --> 00:39:50,280
my father had said. You go through that many times

892
00:39:50,320 --> 00:39:53,760
over right, and what you're really preparing your children for.

893
00:39:53,880 --> 00:39:56,679
It's meant to be like your earthly father's voice before

894
00:39:56,719 --> 00:39:59,760
your children grow and have them the spiritual maturity to

895
00:39:59,800 --> 00:40:03,639
hear their real father's voice. I remember, you know, in

896
00:40:03,880 --> 00:40:07,280
athletics between like seven and twelve, when people would like,

897
00:40:07,400 --> 00:40:09,360
you know, I do like an outright foot. I'm thinking

898
00:40:09,400 --> 00:40:11,280
of like people I'm with elementary school. I remember getting

899
00:40:11,280 --> 00:40:14,320
beat in a race and me thinking like I'm I'm

900
00:40:14,360 --> 00:40:17,000
still the best. You're just better than me at that right,

901
00:40:17,039 --> 00:40:19,519
And the way that I talk about in teach winning

902
00:40:19,519 --> 00:40:22,840
philosophy today. Before I could ever put words to it,

903
00:40:23,559 --> 00:40:24,360
I believed I.

904
00:40:24,360 --> 00:40:26,760
Speaker 3: Was a champion. And so if someone can beat me

905
00:40:26,760 --> 00:40:28,960
in one hundred meter race, but I'm a champion, that

906
00:40:29,079 --> 00:40:31,800
means I must just have other things that I'm great at, right,

907
00:40:31,960 --> 00:40:34,239
And so that's where if you're preparing your children with

908
00:40:34,280 --> 00:40:36,519
the things that you speak into them, what they believe

909
00:40:36,559 --> 00:40:39,920
about themselves based upon the words that you've spoken over them,

910
00:40:40,320 --> 00:40:43,840
that sets them up to actually develop greatness. If you

911
00:40:43,840 --> 00:40:47,400
don't believe you're great unless you're some genetic phenom where

912
00:40:47,440 --> 00:40:50,519
you've just been better than everybody at everything your entire life,

913
00:40:51,000 --> 00:40:53,599
unless someone tells you and helps you understand that you're great,

914
00:40:53,880 --> 00:40:55,599
when you lose, you won't know how to respond.

915
00:40:55,760 --> 00:40:55,960
Speaker 1: Yeah.

916
00:40:56,000 --> 00:40:57,639
Speaker 2: Those are guys in seal teams. You talk about that

917
00:40:57,679 --> 00:40:59,119
all the time. They don't have any resilience.

918
00:40:59,199 --> 00:40:59,400
Speaker 1: Yeah.

919
00:40:59,480 --> 00:41:02,199
Speaker 2: Yeah, all right, Pops, I want to I asked you

920
00:41:02,280 --> 00:41:04,280
this because I think it's it's come up. Pastor Keith's

921
00:41:04,280 --> 00:41:06,400
obviously been a huge blessing to your family the amount

922
00:41:06,400 --> 00:41:09,000
of times on this podcast, Garrett said, Pastor Keith said this,

923
00:41:09,119 --> 00:41:11,199
and I just at a young age I remembered that.

924
00:41:11,960 --> 00:41:13,679
So I think one of things I say all the

925
00:41:13,679 --> 00:41:16,159
time is that I think most men really suck at friendship.

926
00:41:16,440 --> 00:41:18,639
They really do. And one things Pastor Keith always says

927
00:41:18,639 --> 00:41:21,199
is you learn intimacy with a friend like a brother.

928
00:41:21,320 --> 00:41:24,639
Nothing weird, but like you learned intimacy with a friend,

929
00:41:24,800 --> 00:41:27,400
how much did you like your close friendship with him?

930
00:41:27,400 --> 00:41:30,559
Prepare you to then be a better husband for Darlene

931
00:41:30,639 --> 00:41:32,679
and eventually you know, be able to love your kids

932
00:41:32,760 --> 00:41:33,119
that way.

933
00:41:33,480 --> 00:41:36,639
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean, he he teaches on that so well. Right,

934
00:41:36,760 --> 00:41:40,559
So in my own life, I was his first, he

935
00:41:40,599 --> 00:41:44,239
would say, I was his first mentor. We became best friends.

936
00:41:44,920 --> 00:41:47,679
And when he left Sherman, which is where I met

937
00:41:47,719 --> 00:41:49,719
him as a youth pastor. I met him before then

938
00:41:49,800 --> 00:41:53,119
a at a youth camp and I saw him for

939
00:41:53,159 --> 00:41:56,159
the first time, and he had an indelible image to me.

940
00:41:56,199 --> 00:41:58,320
He had a big, bright yellow Jesus is my Strength

941
00:41:58,360 --> 00:42:00,800
shirt on and always was like a real life whole

942
00:42:00,800 --> 00:42:03,559
code he was. It was crazy, you know, big mullet,

943
00:42:03,639 --> 00:42:07,480
big guy. And but when he when he became the

944
00:42:07,519 --> 00:42:09,679
youth pastor, so he was there a couple of years

945
00:42:09,719 --> 00:42:12,480
and then he left to go do some to go

946
00:42:12,719 --> 00:42:17,599
do with Power Team Ministry. Before he left, we stood

947
00:42:17,639 --> 00:42:19,199
out on his loan. He goes, you know, I really

948
00:42:19,239 --> 00:42:21,280
think we're supposed to be together in life and do

949
00:42:21,360 --> 00:42:24,400
ministry together. Let's make sure we figure out how that's

950
00:42:24,440 --> 00:42:27,039
supposed to happen. He was very intentional to me about it,

951
00:42:27,519 --> 00:42:29,800
and up to that point, you know, it was a

952
00:42:29,840 --> 00:42:33,000
mentor mentee type relationship.

953
00:42:33,039 --> 00:42:33,679
Speaker 2: You're in your twenties.

954
00:42:33,679 --> 00:42:36,480
Speaker 1: At twentieseah, from twenty to twenty two.

955
00:42:36,400 --> 00:42:39,400
Speaker 3: Oh right, okay, and at that case four years older.

956
00:42:39,480 --> 00:42:41,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, at that point he'd already married. You know, he

957
00:42:41,599 --> 00:42:43,519
was in my wedding. We'd gotten darling, and I had

958
00:42:43,559 --> 00:42:45,880
gotten married. I met her in the youth group. And

959
00:42:45,920 --> 00:42:48,519
so now he's leaving, and he says, look, let's be intentional.

960
00:42:48,920 --> 00:42:54,800
So here's what's crazy, and most guys just wouldn't do it.

961
00:42:54,960 --> 00:42:59,159
I was busy building a business, being, you know, trying

962
00:42:59,199 --> 00:43:03,880
to conquer the world. He's traveling the globe, and almost

963
00:43:04,039 --> 00:43:06,239
every time he would come into town, he would reach

964
00:43:06,280 --> 00:43:09,239
out to me, and at least once a month, at

965
00:43:09,320 --> 00:43:11,519
least once a month, he would come off the road,

966
00:43:12,239 --> 00:43:16,079
get in his car or his motorcycle and come. He

967
00:43:16,159 --> 00:43:18,800
lived in Dallas in that area and would come see me.

968
00:43:18,840 --> 00:43:21,480
In Sherman. He'd say, he just calls I'm coming up,

969
00:43:21,920 --> 00:43:23,599
So then you know, here I am the young guy

970
00:43:24,000 --> 00:43:26,679
with or newly married, you know, newly married. And then

971
00:43:26,719 --> 00:43:29,800
a couple years later, maybe you know, Britney shows up

972
00:43:30,199 --> 00:43:33,119
and he's like, I'm coming right, and you know, it

973
00:43:33,199 --> 00:43:35,800
didn't matter if he's convenient or inconvenient. He was very

974
00:43:35,840 --> 00:43:40,360
intentional about us staying connected. And so that taught me.

975
00:43:41,360 --> 00:43:43,599
It's not that I didn't have friends in school, and

976
00:43:43,599 --> 00:43:46,840
I still have some lifelong friends, but he taught me

977
00:43:47,039 --> 00:43:51,280
how to be intimate with a male and that was

978
00:43:52,760 --> 00:43:56,199
a skill that is stuck with me. I think it's

979
00:43:56,360 --> 00:43:59,280
very it's relevant with my children on how to be

980
00:43:59,360 --> 00:44:02,039
intimate with hear it, how to be a father figure

981
00:44:02,079 --> 00:44:05,360
but also yet have intimacy. I think you would feel

982
00:44:05,360 --> 00:44:07,239
that for me, You feel my warmth and my love

983
00:44:07,280 --> 00:44:09,360
for you. If you're in my circle, you feel that

984
00:44:09,840 --> 00:44:15,360
you're loved by me, and that only comes from positive

985
00:44:15,360 --> 00:44:18,800
male interaction. And I think that our whole men's group

986
00:44:19,360 --> 00:44:22,000
in a lot of cases exudes that we're very close

987
00:44:22,079 --> 00:44:24,440
with a lot of guys and they have close friends,

988
00:44:24,800 --> 00:44:26,679
and they would all tell you none of them ever

989
00:44:26,719 --> 00:44:27,679
had that growing up.

990
00:44:27,599 --> 00:44:30,039
Speaker 3: And I want to put words to it for someone

991
00:44:30,039 --> 00:44:33,119
who's asking like, well, how do you do that? As

992
00:44:33,480 --> 00:44:36,440
you know, obviously getting to watch it, growing up, being

993
00:44:36,440 --> 00:44:39,599
an observer of Pastor Keith as well, and really taking

994
00:44:39,599 --> 00:44:44,119
these things into my life. Well, Pastor Keith is great at.

995
00:44:44,320 --> 00:44:45,920
If you know, we were talking, we talked about things

996
00:44:45,960 --> 00:44:48,639
that Pop's is great at. We're going to talk about

997
00:44:48,639 --> 00:44:51,960
the things that Pastor Keith is great at. It's intentionality

998
00:44:52,480 --> 00:44:55,000
and it's his expressiveness right right, and so you can

999
00:44:55,039 --> 00:44:58,000
do intentionality is like, hey, that he's the one like

1000
00:44:58,039 --> 00:45:01,320
the takeaway, don't miss a moment, right, So he's the limit.

1001
00:45:01,360 --> 00:45:03,440
He would squeeze the lemon. I'm going to come spend

1002
00:45:03,440 --> 00:45:06,079
time with Scott. I'm gonna you know, when I'm with Scott,

1003
00:45:06,159 --> 00:45:07,920
we're gonna We're not just going to hang out like

1004
00:45:08,039 --> 00:45:09,519
this is going to be intentional time and to make

1005
00:45:09,559 --> 00:45:12,280
sure we do something meaningful, that memories come away from this,

1006
00:45:12,400 --> 00:45:15,280
have the right conversations and not wasted words. But then

1007
00:45:15,320 --> 00:45:18,440
the expressiveness either you know, hey, I want to really

1008
00:45:18,480 --> 00:45:20,840
tell you what you mean to me, or that you know,

1009
00:45:20,920 --> 00:45:23,760
Pops is very expressive in writing letters and things like that.

1010
00:45:23,880 --> 00:45:25,920
So if you want to cat like, how do you

1011
00:45:26,000 --> 00:45:28,400
do that? How do you have like an intimate relationship?

1012
00:45:28,599 --> 00:45:30,639
It's intentionality and forms of expression.

1013
00:45:30,960 --> 00:45:33,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, well, just to just to tie that together to

1014
00:45:33,599 --> 00:45:36,400
what we're talking about being a father today. So I

1015
00:45:36,440 --> 00:45:39,760
didn't have a good father role to be intentional until

1016
00:45:40,519 --> 00:45:43,480
till way after I was an adult. Did my dad

1017
00:45:43,519 --> 00:45:47,880
have any type of what I would call those feelings

1018
00:45:47,920 --> 00:45:49,280
of intimacy.

1019
00:45:48,719 --> 00:45:50,000
Speaker 2: Or love availability?

1020
00:45:50,039 --> 00:45:53,119
Speaker 1: Yeah? Yeah, So I got that from a lot of

1021
00:45:53,119 --> 00:45:56,599
that from Pastor Keith, but I wasn't a knucklehead about it.

1022
00:45:56,679 --> 00:46:00,280
I let that roll into my family. Yeah right, because

1023
00:46:00,320 --> 00:46:04,320
I could be My natural default is to be very

1024
00:46:04,320 --> 00:46:08,239
stoic to not I'm not a motive at all. I'm

1025
00:46:08,239 --> 00:46:15,280
not easily the greatness of being that it is if

1026
00:46:15,320 --> 00:46:20,199
your spouse is highly emotional that you can regulate that.

1027
00:46:20,519 --> 00:46:23,320
And negative is that you're not as near as emotional

1028
00:46:23,360 --> 00:46:26,760
and loving as you should be. So that's a trained skill, right,

1029
00:46:26,800 --> 00:46:29,639
And so Pastor Keith helped me. I already had the

1030
00:46:29,719 --> 00:46:34,000
low side learning to get out of that and and

1031
00:46:34,719 --> 00:46:38,440
be emotional and be tender and to be loving and

1032
00:46:38,599 --> 00:46:43,519
to encourage your children. Those are great skills of being

1033
00:46:43,519 --> 00:46:45,920
a father, and I had no one to mirror that

1034
00:46:45,960 --> 00:46:48,960
after so it was just learning as I went right.

1035
00:46:49,440 --> 00:46:53,119
And so but I can tell you, my kid, I

1036
00:46:53,159 --> 00:46:54,639
tell people all the time, and the way I say

1037
00:46:54,639 --> 00:46:57,039
this is look, as a father, you're gonna have plenty

1038
00:46:57,039 --> 00:46:59,159
of times you screwed up. My kids don't remember all

1039
00:46:59,159 --> 00:47:00,880
the times I screwed up. They have this you for

1040
00:47:01,039 --> 00:47:05,199
it thought process that I was perfect because they remember

1041
00:47:05,239 --> 00:47:07,800
the good times, right, So they stacked the winds stack

1042
00:47:08,199 --> 00:47:11,000
and that's how they see me. But here's the deal.

1043
00:47:11,199 --> 00:47:16,119
The reason that exists is because they felt loved. Bottom line,

1044
00:47:16,320 --> 00:47:21,559
love covers up mistakes. It covers up mishaps. I apologize

1045
00:47:21,559 --> 00:47:24,000
to my kids when't necessary. My kids would tell you

1046
00:47:24,119 --> 00:47:27,880
I apologize, and I still do today. And if you're

1047
00:47:28,000 --> 00:47:31,519
willing to be that love will cover up a lot

1048
00:47:31,519 --> 00:47:35,199
of the stupid right that men can do. And then again,

1049
00:47:35,280 --> 00:47:38,599
it falls back to consistency. Keep doing it. Over time,

1050
00:47:38,639 --> 00:47:41,400
it becomes easy, it becomes a way of life, and

1051
00:47:41,480 --> 00:47:46,159
then you stop doing I stopped being shut down, stop

1052
00:47:46,239 --> 00:47:52,400
being kurt, stop being I start being emotionally regulated. The

1053
00:47:52,440 --> 00:47:55,440
word equanimity, I never heard that word until Garrett started

1054
00:47:55,480 --> 00:48:00,639
talking about it. But equanimity is a superpower. Yeah for

1055
00:48:01,320 --> 00:48:01,719
a dad.

1056
00:48:02,079 --> 00:48:04,519
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's so good, Pops. That that love covers the

1057
00:48:04,559 --> 00:48:05,119
stupid man.

1058
00:48:05,239 --> 00:48:05,880
Speaker 1: I love that.

1059
00:48:07,159 --> 00:48:09,800
Speaker 2: And just the way Pastor Keith always talks about intimacy,

1060
00:48:09,840 --> 00:48:12,159
because for some people that can that's only used in

1061
00:48:12,159 --> 00:48:14,360
like a sexual way, and obviously we don't mean anything

1062
00:48:14,440 --> 00:48:18,079
like that. No, he says, it's into me c which

1063
00:48:18,119 --> 00:48:20,840
really speaks about a depth of connection. And that's what

1064
00:48:20,880 --> 00:48:22,679
you learn from being intentional. And like Garrett touched on,

1065
00:48:22,880 --> 00:48:25,320
you write letters. I've had a letter from you. It's amazing,

1066
00:48:25,639 --> 00:48:28,559
Like on people's birthdays. You've started this tradition. Now, if

1067
00:48:28,559 --> 00:48:30,400
you're in the Uncle Bock circle, you write a letter

1068
00:48:30,440 --> 00:48:31,840
that person, Yeah, and like you.

1069
00:48:31,760 --> 00:48:33,840
Speaker 1: Want him to have it so they can refer to

1070
00:48:33,880 --> 00:48:36,679
it if they're ever questioning who they are, right, they

1071
00:48:36,679 --> 00:48:39,239
can look back at that encouragement. I'll tell you what

1072
00:48:39,320 --> 00:48:41,480
intimate is creates. And this is a funny story. You've

1073
00:48:41,480 --> 00:48:43,480
never heard me tell You've never heard this, and Garrett

1074
00:48:43,480 --> 00:48:45,280
probably won't like that, I'm gonna tell it. Yes, I

1075
00:48:45,320 --> 00:48:48,119
like to see it, so we would. So Garrett and

1076
00:48:48,119 --> 00:48:50,239
I have always been close, so I'm not afraid to

1077
00:48:50,239 --> 00:48:52,039
touch him. I'm not afraid to kiss him. I'm not

1078
00:48:52,079 --> 00:48:56,039
afraid to hugginghim, and he's a big strong man. When

1079
00:48:56,320 --> 00:48:59,920
when he was going through buds, I would fly out

1080
00:49:00,079 --> 00:49:03,840
to California occasionally, just me by myself, I said. I

1081
00:49:03,840 --> 00:49:06,039
told Arlan, I said, Lessen, Garrett needs some dad time.

1082
00:49:06,159 --> 00:49:07,519
I need to go out there and be with him.

1083
00:49:07,960 --> 00:49:10,880
We go out there and play golf for a day

1084
00:49:11,000 --> 00:49:15,199
or two, just hang out, have food, whatever, just encourage him.

1085
00:49:15,280 --> 00:49:19,199
Right when we're walking down the street, he would be

1086
00:49:19,480 --> 00:49:22,239
leaning on me, you know, have his arm on me.

1087
00:49:22,320 --> 00:49:24,239
So here he is a Navy seal or want to

1088
00:49:24,280 --> 00:49:28,840
be Navy seal and being what some people would say

1089
00:49:30,000 --> 00:49:35,320
intimate or unusually friendly with his father, right and so,

1090
00:49:35,559 --> 00:49:38,159
but that was normal for us, and I expected it,

1091
00:49:38,320 --> 00:49:40,480
and he didn't think anything about it and could care

1092
00:49:40,599 --> 00:49:43,280
less what anybody else said. Well, fast forward that to

1093
00:49:43,320 --> 00:49:47,480
seal graduation. So I'm always watching, right, So we're in there.

1094
00:49:47,760 --> 00:49:50,559
It's a very limited invite. You can invite a couple

1095
00:49:50,639 --> 00:49:54,440
extra families that come. You can't post about it. Already

1096
00:49:54,480 --> 00:49:54,960
had been.

1097
00:49:55,239 --> 00:49:56,760
Speaker 3: How they don't even let families come.

1098
00:49:58,679 --> 00:49:59,920
Speaker 2: That's disappointing, Yeah it is.

1099
00:50:00,239 --> 00:50:03,960
Speaker 1: But my point was is I watched these men with

1100
00:50:04,079 --> 00:50:10,599
their sons. How awkward it was handshakes? Wow, at most

1101
00:50:11,039 --> 00:50:15,400
not there's like the hug at the end of step brothers. Yeah. Yeah,

1102
00:50:15,440 --> 00:50:17,840
And I thought, I thought to myself, of course I

1103
00:50:17,840 --> 00:50:20,519
had already experienced some of these guys, and I knew

1104
00:50:20,639 --> 00:50:24,360
some of their journeys, and some of them were hardcore,

1105
00:50:24,480 --> 00:50:26,239
and they were just trying to prove something. If their

1106
00:50:26,320 --> 00:50:28,599
dad was even there, you know, if their dad was there.

1107
00:50:28,599 --> 00:50:30,599
Some of them was just making my class.

1108
00:50:30,760 --> 00:50:34,000
Speaker 3: From this is anecdotal and from my memory, but of

1109
00:50:34,119 --> 00:50:37,239
my graduating class, it was less than five guys that

1110
00:50:37,719 --> 00:50:39,719
their dad was there, and it's like, give my dad

1111
00:50:39,719 --> 00:50:42,480
a hug. For everyone else it was if their dad

1112
00:50:42,559 --> 00:50:46,239
was even there, it was a handshake. People graduated my

1113
00:50:46,400 --> 00:50:48,119
graduate it was forty four.

1114
00:50:47,960 --> 00:50:50,920
Speaker 1: Or forty something like that. All right, Okay, so here's

1115
00:50:50,960 --> 00:50:54,000
my point. The point is is not to pat myself

1116
00:50:54,039 --> 00:50:56,519
on the back or get on the back. My point

1117
00:50:56,599 --> 00:51:01,400
is is that did it lessen his masculine masculinity. I

1118
00:51:01,400 --> 00:51:04,320
would tell you it increased it because he gave him confidence,

1119
00:51:04,880 --> 00:51:06,880
he was loved, he had somebody with him. I'm a

1120
00:51:06,880 --> 00:51:10,840
strong guy. I am a hardcore guy. There's a monster

1121
00:51:10,960 --> 00:51:14,719
inside me that I am fully aware is there that

1122
00:51:14,800 --> 00:51:17,519
I don't want to have come out. But if you're

1123
00:51:17,679 --> 00:51:21,239
trying to harm my family, you're going to meet that guy, right.

1124
00:51:21,280 --> 00:51:24,000
Speaker 3: Well, it's the love and the character on the inside

1125
00:51:24,679 --> 00:51:29,239
that develops the the final sharpness, the final greatness of

1126
00:51:29,280 --> 00:51:33,280
a warrior, which being sacrificial, only comes out of love.

1127
00:51:33,639 --> 00:51:36,000
And so like, you can be very tough, you can

1128
00:51:36,039 --> 00:51:39,239
be very capable and be hard on the outside, but

1129
00:51:39,320 --> 00:51:41,800
the greatest, you know, the final form of what a

1130
00:51:41,840 --> 00:51:44,199
warrior can be, only comes from having love and character

1131
00:51:44,199 --> 00:51:44,800
on the inside.

1132
00:51:44,880 --> 00:51:47,119
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm seeing the trend here because I remember you

1133
00:51:47,119 --> 00:51:48,519
took a twenty three and meter and came back one

1134
00:51:48,559 --> 00:51:51,320
hundred percent hard dog. So I knew. I knew that

1135
00:51:51,320 --> 00:51:53,760
that was Just in case anyone's wondering about the affection.

1136
00:51:53,920 --> 00:51:56,840
Speaker 1: Well, my point in saying that is is I'm a

1137
00:51:56,880 --> 00:52:00,199
man's man. I'm a hunter, I'm an athlete, I'm an

1138
00:52:00,199 --> 00:52:02,159
outdoors When you could drop me in the jungle, I'm

1139
00:52:02,159 --> 00:52:04,400
going to survive. I know what to do. I'm not

1140
00:52:04,480 --> 00:52:06,880
afraid to be there. We dragged him up Pike's Peak.

1141
00:52:07,360 --> 00:52:11,920
Speaker 4: Oh my gosh, that's a whole other story. No, Mercy's

1142
00:52:11,960 --> 00:52:14,960
trying to kill me. Hey, look, it was a man's climb.

1143
00:52:14,960 --> 00:52:17,679
This is not this is not a boy and just

1144
00:52:17,679 --> 00:52:19,039
so you know, left me behind.

1145
00:52:19,159 --> 00:52:22,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, it's.

1146
00:52:22,119 --> 00:52:23,920
Speaker 1: The only one person I love more than my dad,

1147
00:52:23,920 --> 00:52:24,760
and it's my wife.

1148
00:52:25,039 --> 00:52:28,760
Speaker 5: Had to get most insulting thing about that hike was

1149
00:52:28,800 --> 00:52:30,400
the people that took the train up that we're wearing

1150
00:52:30,400 --> 00:52:32,840
Louis Vuitton, and we showed up like just covered and

1151
00:52:33,000 --> 00:52:36,800
sweat and like just they're getting an.

1152
00:52:36,679 --> 00:52:38,239
Speaker 2: Ice cream, like oh the other they should starting to

1153
00:52:38,239 --> 00:52:38,639
affect me.

1154
00:52:38,639 --> 00:52:43,159
Speaker 1: And I'm like, man, you guys, but anyway to bring

1155
00:52:43,199 --> 00:52:45,280
it back, My point is is that you can be

1156
00:52:45,360 --> 00:52:48,960
a man's man and still be extremely loving with your

1157
00:52:49,079 --> 00:52:53,920
children and your spouse and exude that type of deep

1158
00:52:54,000 --> 00:52:57,639
intimacy and it's a positive. It's not a negative. Man like,

1159
00:52:57,679 --> 00:52:59,239
I got to be stronger, I gotta be tough, I

1160
00:52:59,239 --> 00:53:01,519
got to be a certain why And it really is

1161
00:53:01,599 --> 00:53:03,679
just a bunch of ball, Yeah it is. I mean,

1162
00:53:04,400 --> 00:53:07,280
you can be loving and intimate with your kids and

1163
00:53:07,320 --> 00:53:10,079
you should be. They should feel safe with you.

1164
00:53:10,320 --> 00:53:15,079
Speaker 3: Yeah, there's a lot of meat that we're hitting today,

1165
00:53:15,440 --> 00:53:17,719
but there's one that and this is not like a

1166
00:53:17,760 --> 00:53:20,480
super deep spiritual point, but I think It's an important

1167
00:53:20,519 --> 00:53:22,559
point that I want to make sure we hit while

1168
00:53:22,559 --> 00:53:26,639
we got Pops here, because there's a question people ask,

1169
00:53:27,159 --> 00:53:30,400
especially for people who you know the same way that

1170
00:53:30,480 --> 00:53:33,360
you know, my dad had to develop how to love children,

1171
00:53:33,559 --> 00:53:35,480
how to you know, be a great dad because he

1172
00:53:35,519 --> 00:53:37,880
didn't have that. For a lot of you out there

1173
00:53:38,039 --> 00:53:41,559
that you know, your parents weren't successful, didn't have any money,

1174
00:53:41,599 --> 00:53:44,159
and now you have money, you wonder how to deal.

1175
00:53:43,960 --> 00:53:45,360
Speaker 1: With that with your kids, right?

1176
00:53:45,599 --> 00:53:48,159
Speaker 3: And I grew up with a dat you know, I

1177
00:53:48,760 --> 00:53:52,079
grew up with when I, you know, building skateboard ramps

1178
00:53:52,079 --> 00:53:54,320
in front of my dad's ferrari and a lot of

1179
00:53:54,360 --> 00:53:58,239
people they think like, oh, the the only way to

1180
00:53:58,320 --> 00:54:00,960
build greatness and resilience in kids, you know that they

1181
00:54:00,960 --> 00:54:04,920
see most people's story of that comes from like having nothing,

1182
00:54:05,559 --> 00:54:08,440
and there is a right way to raise kids. You

1183
00:54:08,480 --> 00:54:10,719
know what's cool in my story too, is I went

1184
00:54:10,760 --> 00:54:12,719
through a season of my life where my parents had everything,

1185
00:54:13,119 --> 00:54:14,559
and I went through a season of my life where

1186
00:54:14,559 --> 00:54:17,320
my parents had nothing, and I watched them be the

1187
00:54:17,360 --> 00:54:20,800
same people in both instances. But while we got Pops here,

1188
00:54:20,840 --> 00:54:22,440
I just wanted to tee you up to talk about

1189
00:54:22,480 --> 00:54:23,960
that one for people because I think it's something that

1190
00:54:23,960 --> 00:54:25,000
people struggle.

1191
00:54:24,639 --> 00:54:27,519
Speaker 1: With, and you know that people struggle with that, like, you.

1192
00:54:27,480 --> 00:54:29,159
Speaker 3: Know, if I have money, if or I have stuff,

1193
00:54:29,199 --> 00:54:31,760
what's the right way to deal with that with my kids.

1194
00:54:32,159 --> 00:54:35,360
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a great question, and I've seen a lot

1195
00:54:35,400 --> 00:54:41,119
of disasters in regards to that. The challenge with people

1196
00:54:41,199 --> 00:54:43,760
my age is, which is the end of the baby boomers.

1197
00:54:44,880 --> 00:54:49,679
They swung the pendulum from what was a very hard

1198
00:54:49,800 --> 00:54:53,960
upbringing to what would be the first of some of

1199
00:54:54,000 --> 00:54:58,559
the most wonderful times in America of prosperity and growth

1200
00:54:58,800 --> 00:55:03,320
in the stock market and whatever. And they didn't want

1201
00:55:03,360 --> 00:55:06,400
their kids to go through hard times they went through.

1202
00:55:07,679 --> 00:55:13,480
So it creates entitlement on a level that as you know,

1203
00:55:13,960 --> 00:55:19,480
some people my age, your age generation have went through

1204
00:55:19,480 --> 00:55:22,519
a very very difficult time of owning anything. And I

1205
00:55:22,519 --> 00:55:26,280
don't mean owning things like a car. I mean owning it.

1206
00:55:26,280 --> 00:55:29,559
It's everyone else's problem and not theirs because they were

1207
00:55:30,039 --> 00:55:34,119
treated a certain way. I took Garrett on. I was

1208
00:55:34,159 --> 00:55:36,320
a member of the country club, and I could do

1209
00:55:36,400 --> 00:55:38,280
whatever I had season in my life. I could go

1210
00:55:38,320 --> 00:55:42,320
anywhere and do anything, fly anywhere first class, and do whatever.

1211
00:55:42,719 --> 00:55:46,000
I was a millionaire very early in my life. But

1212
00:55:46,159 --> 00:55:50,440
I had Garrett with me as a child five six

1213
00:55:50,559 --> 00:55:54,760
years old. We started being together a lot, and I

1214
00:55:54,880 --> 00:55:58,159
just took him with me. By the way, it's extremely

1215
00:55:58,159 --> 00:56:01,119
inconvenient when you bring your sun and mighty man. It's

1216
00:56:01,159 --> 00:56:04,880
extremely inconvenient because he does his best. But he's a child.

1217
00:56:05,400 --> 00:56:08,280
He's got to be instructed, loved and encouraged and directed.

1218
00:56:08,360 --> 00:56:14,519
Often everything is longer, everything is harder. But if you

1219
00:56:14,599 --> 00:56:18,239
will spend time with your children and you're doing the

1220
00:56:18,320 --> 00:56:22,800
right things. Obviously, if you're running off to a brothel,

1221
00:56:23,559 --> 00:56:25,800
you're not taking your children, and that's why you can't

1222
00:56:25,800 --> 00:56:27,519
take your kids with you, right But if you have

1223
00:56:27,639 --> 00:56:29,480
your kids with you, you're generally going to be doing the

1224
00:56:29,519 --> 00:56:32,599
things you're supposed to be doing, which is a safeguard also.

1225
00:56:33,280 --> 00:56:36,960
But I spent time with him. I also did not

1226
00:56:37,400 --> 00:56:40,480
cut him any slack. So if he was with me,

1227
00:56:40,599 --> 00:56:43,000
he had responsibilities. He said, what do you mean while

1228
00:56:43,039 --> 00:56:46,199
at five, if we're putting together a table, he's responsible

1229
00:56:46,199 --> 00:56:48,920
for the screws. Don't lose him.

1230
00:56:49,400 --> 00:56:51,119
Speaker 3: You think about it in the same way that Pops

1231
00:56:51,119 --> 00:56:55,800
has been with you. Sometimes when I'm with seven, in

1232
00:56:55,880 --> 00:56:57,840
both a correction little bit and a loving way.

1233
00:56:57,880 --> 00:56:59,880
Speaker 1: But it's like, what are you thinking? Right?

1234
00:57:00,639 --> 00:57:03,679
Speaker 3: You pay attention, quit losing stuff right right? Be like

1235
00:57:04,400 --> 00:57:07,679
you know the lessons that you got at forty years old?

1236
00:57:07,719 --> 00:57:10,079
Like why'd you cut yourself with a knife? Yeah, he

1237
00:57:10,239 --> 00:57:12,199
was the same way to me back then. I'm sorry

1238
00:57:12,239 --> 00:57:13,440
I wasn't sensitive about that.

1239
00:57:13,480 --> 00:57:15,519
Speaker 2: I think it's hilarious. You know, it's apologize. I'll never

1240
00:57:15,559 --> 00:57:16,199
regretted it.

1241
00:57:16,639 --> 00:57:19,280
Speaker 1: Well, that's exactly what I needed. But let me let

1242
00:57:19,280 --> 00:57:21,039
me take it to where I'm going with that. So

1243
00:57:21,119 --> 00:57:27,159
you've got your kids do not need everything. Kids that

1244
00:57:27,280 --> 00:57:29,559
are given us sports car as their first car have

1245
00:57:29,719 --> 00:57:31,920
no sense of value about what it takes to earn

1246
00:57:31,960 --> 00:57:35,079
that sports car. I did not baby my children. My

1247
00:57:35,159 --> 00:57:39,239
wife and I found balance. She was not treated the

1248
00:57:39,239 --> 00:57:41,000
same way I was as a child, and so we

1249
00:57:41,039 --> 00:57:43,719
had to find balance for what works for us. But

1250
00:57:44,079 --> 00:57:47,639
I'm always, I always believe that your kids are way

1251
00:57:47,679 --> 00:57:50,639
more capable than you think they are. And I was

1252
00:57:50,719 --> 00:57:55,679
determined to put Garrett in those environments and brittany where

1253
00:57:56,079 --> 00:57:59,920
they had to grow up and perform and be responsible.

1254
00:58:00,079 --> 00:58:02,440
And I think it was one of the key things

1255
00:58:02,480 --> 00:58:06,679
that I did now that is also scriptural. So It's

1256
00:58:06,760 --> 00:58:09,719
not just something that dad was a hard dog, as

1257
00:58:09,760 --> 00:58:13,880
you were kidding. I like to think that I'm strong,

1258
00:58:14,159 --> 00:58:18,440
but that that you give your kids a chance to

1259
00:58:18,480 --> 00:58:21,159
perform and that you give them a chance to fail.

1260
00:58:22,360 --> 00:58:26,639
We did not do participation trophies back then. My kids

1261
00:58:26,679 --> 00:58:29,039
do not have any participation trophy because they were given

1262
00:58:29,039 --> 00:58:30,159
to them. You know what we did with them in

1263
00:58:30,199 --> 00:58:32,519
the track. Yeah, and we talked about it because we

1264
00:58:32,519 --> 00:58:35,519
don't do participation trophies. There's winners and losers in life.

1265
00:58:35,719 --> 00:58:37,519
We want to be the champion. We want to win.

1266
00:58:37,760 --> 00:58:39,599
We want to do the best we can do. We'll

1267
00:58:39,920 --> 00:58:42,599
always try to win. If we're second, well second's better

1268
00:58:42,639 --> 00:58:45,599
than fifth, but we're trying to win. You know. It's

1269
00:58:46,039 --> 00:58:50,920
the Ricky Bibby statement. Yeah, it's not true, right, there

1270
00:58:51,000 --> 00:58:55,559
is daddy. So, but you understand what I'm saying. So,

1271
00:58:55,960 --> 00:59:01,119
raising kids and being soft on them doesn't help anybody.

1272
00:59:01,639 --> 00:59:06,159
It just doesn't. The Word of God clearly says to

1273
00:59:06,199 --> 00:59:09,800
discipline your children, to raise your children properly, to raise

1274
00:59:09,840 --> 00:59:12,639
them with honor, and to give them, give them something

1275
00:59:12,679 --> 00:59:17,920
to honor, but raise them being respectful. Uh. In our home,

1276
00:59:18,880 --> 00:59:21,800
if you wanted to get in trouble. It was lying

1277
00:59:22,719 --> 00:59:26,199
or a bad attitude right pretty much. Yet if you

1278
00:59:26,239 --> 00:59:28,599
didn't get the grades you we were supposed to get both.

1279
00:59:28,440 --> 00:59:32,039
Speaker 2: Of those equal to belt, that is stuck because your

1280
00:59:32,079 --> 00:59:34,039
kids are both very good at both of those things.

1281
00:59:34,119 --> 00:59:37,480
Speaker 1: Yes, but you know if you didn't, if you didn't

1282
00:59:37,519 --> 00:59:39,599
make an A, which I expected my kids to make

1283
00:59:39,639 --> 00:59:41,559
a's because I knew they were capable, then we would

1284
00:59:41,599 --> 00:59:45,119
talk about it. That wasn't a disciplinary action. It was

1285
00:59:45,159 --> 00:59:48,800
a discussion and why why did you not make an

1286
00:59:48,840 --> 00:59:52,000
A when you're you know, if your kids are capable

1287
00:59:52,000 --> 00:59:53,719
of not Some kids are challenging at math and they're

1288
00:59:53,719 --> 00:59:55,519
not going to make a's, But a C is a

1289
00:59:55,559 --> 00:59:57,960
good a good score. So as long as they make

1290
00:59:58,000 --> 01:00:00,960
a C, you know they're doing what matters. Because math

1291
01:00:01,000 --> 01:00:05,039
doesn't work for everybody, it works for me, it works forget.

1292
01:00:05,039 --> 01:00:07,639
We were both math guys. But Brittany was on the

1293
01:00:07,639 --> 01:00:10,719
other end of the scale. She was always more on

1294
01:00:10,760 --> 01:00:14,159
the literary side, right, so she would lean that way.

1295
01:00:14,679 --> 01:00:17,039
And so where English might have been hard for Garrett

1296
01:00:17,159 --> 01:00:18,320
was easy for Brittany.

1297
01:00:18,320 --> 01:00:20,400
Speaker 3: A lots of arguments with my English teacher.

1298
01:00:20,320 --> 01:00:21,639
Speaker 1: Never argued with my math teachers.

1299
01:00:22,480 --> 01:00:23,559
Speaker 2: They were speaking your native time.

1300
01:00:23,679 --> 01:00:26,119
Speaker 1: But she understand what I'm saying. So it's really a

1301
01:00:26,119 --> 01:00:28,679
matter of and it all comes back you guys training

1302
01:00:28,679 --> 01:00:31,400
on all this stuff. Core values. Our family had core values.

1303
01:00:31,639 --> 01:00:33,559
When we started having core values, we didn't know they

1304
01:00:33,559 --> 01:00:36,840
were core values. They became core values of things that

1305
01:00:36,920 --> 01:00:41,159
we what you're about, son, yeah, and pousitive, and so

1306
01:00:41,480 --> 01:00:43,960
we had integrity. We don't lie. I mean, you know

1307
01:00:44,000 --> 01:00:45,960
where your kids are lying. I mean it's not like

1308
01:00:46,039 --> 01:00:47,760
hard to figure it out, but we dealt with it.

1309
01:00:47,880 --> 01:00:50,800
I mean on the spot. If you had a bad attitude,

1310
01:00:51,159 --> 01:00:52,760
you were going to get in trouble.

1311
01:00:52,800 --> 01:00:55,159
Speaker 3: Brittany tested my parents' discernment.

1312
01:00:56,199 --> 01:01:01,039
Speaker 1: Man, man, Thank goodness that Darlene is as somewhat of

1313
01:01:01,079 --> 01:01:03,800
a prophet and always has been very sensitive to the

1314
01:01:03,800 --> 01:01:07,000
Holy Spirit. And Brittany couldn't fool her. But Brittany could

1315
01:01:07,000 --> 01:01:10,840
fool me wow and for a little bit, yeah, on

1316
01:01:11,000 --> 01:01:14,480
certain things. And she couldn't fool she couldn't fool mom.

1317
01:01:14,840 --> 01:01:18,199
Mom knew and Mom knew about this one too. She

1318
01:01:18,360 --> 01:01:22,039
always had that sense. But but my point in saying

1319
01:01:22,039 --> 01:01:23,639
all that is because it's a lead up to what

1320
01:01:23,679 --> 01:01:30,360
Garrett said about about raising your children and the current

1321
01:01:31,039 --> 01:01:33,719
mantra that's out there that your kids shouldn't have it hard.

1322
01:01:34,079 --> 01:01:36,119
It's not about making it hard for your kids. It's

1323
01:01:36,119 --> 01:01:39,320
about making them strong. Let them make decisions, let them fail,

1324
01:01:39,559 --> 01:01:42,960
give them some challenges, give reward them positively for those

1325
01:01:43,159 --> 01:01:46,440
for those wins. Garrett had a nice beat up truck

1326
01:01:46,679 --> 01:01:50,119
that he drove, thank goodness, because he was hard on it.

1327
01:01:50,920 --> 01:01:52,239
If it had been anew one, it would have been

1328
01:01:52,239 --> 01:01:52,639
a beat up.

1329
01:01:52,639 --> 01:01:55,239
Speaker 3: Trust It was far from the nicest car in the

1330
01:01:55,239 --> 01:01:57,760
school parking lot, but I thought it was great.

1331
01:01:57,840 --> 01:01:58,719
Speaker 1: It was that one fifty.

1332
01:01:58,840 --> 01:01:59,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's alt true.

1333
01:02:00,360 --> 01:02:03,400
Speaker 1: Brittany, on the other hand, steadily went downhill with her

1334
01:02:03,440 --> 01:02:06,599
card because she was not responsible. Oh really started off

1335
01:02:06,599 --> 01:02:09,280
for a nice car. We stepped it down, then we

1336
01:02:09,320 --> 01:02:11,840
stepped it down again, then we stepped it down again,

1337
01:02:12,599 --> 01:02:16,199
and that's why she finished college in right. So anyway,

1338
01:02:16,239 --> 01:02:16,880
my point.

1339
01:02:16,639 --> 01:02:20,360
Speaker 2: Is finished in a Ford focus. Yeah, sounds like my

1340
01:02:20,679 --> 01:02:23,159
law career did not go well.

1341
01:02:23,239 --> 01:02:26,239
Speaker 1: My point is is be intentional about your kids. Let

1342
01:02:26,280 --> 01:02:31,159
them the word of God shares what happened in the

1343
01:02:31,320 --> 01:02:35,280
Jewish community, and at age thirteen you were considered a male.

1344
01:02:35,360 --> 01:02:37,000
Now I realize they didn't live as long as we

1345
01:02:37,039 --> 01:02:38,920
do now, and so they had to get on with

1346
01:02:38,960 --> 01:02:44,360
their business. But at thirteen years old, a young boy

1347
01:02:44,360 --> 01:02:48,440
would be given his endowment basically, take a wife and

1348
01:02:48,559 --> 01:02:50,719
get on with his life. Now you think about that,

1349
01:02:51,320 --> 01:02:54,400
we don't even we have our kids playing video games

1350
01:02:54,400 --> 01:02:57,159
and not being responsible for anything. We'll shame on you,

1351
01:02:57,840 --> 01:03:00,679
right Garrett, By the time he was a young man,

1352
01:03:00,760 --> 01:03:03,039
we would get We went hunting a lot, we had

1353
01:03:03,039 --> 01:03:04,960
a deer lease that we had those ours, and we

1354
01:03:05,000 --> 01:03:07,840
would take guests out there for our company. I could

1355
01:03:07,840 --> 01:03:11,320
trust Garrett to go out with grown men and I

1356
01:03:11,360 --> 01:03:12,760
would say, Garrett's.

1357
01:03:12,480 --> 01:03:14,880
Speaker 3: About Nick, you know, going hunting for the first time

1358
01:03:15,119 --> 01:03:17,000
at twelve years old. I could have said, Okay, here's

1359
01:03:17,000 --> 01:03:18,360
what we're going to do, all right.

1360
01:03:18,400 --> 01:03:19,840
Speaker 1: And he didn't. They go you want me to do?

1361
01:03:19,960 --> 01:03:22,639
I said, do not shoot an animal unless he tells

1362
01:03:22,679 --> 01:03:27,400
you to. Huh period, Wow. They okay, and then that

1363
01:03:27,480 --> 01:03:28,920
they'd come back go, oh, he really doesn't know what

1364
01:03:29,000 --> 01:03:32,280
he's doing. I go, yes, he's been trained, that's awesome. Yeah. So,

1365
01:03:32,719 --> 01:03:37,840
but I mean it takes time, a lot of what

1366
01:03:37,880 --> 01:03:39,719
do you want? What do you want out of your children?

1367
01:03:39,760 --> 01:03:41,800
As I always tell people, I mean, if you're not

1368
01:03:41,920 --> 01:03:43,360
getting the results that you want.

1369
01:03:43,400 --> 01:03:45,480
Speaker 2: Who Yeah, who's fault of that?

1370
01:03:45,559 --> 01:03:46,000
Speaker 1: Who's fault?

1371
01:03:46,079 --> 01:03:47,880
Speaker 3: I would say, it's just like anything else in life.

1372
01:03:47,960 --> 01:03:50,840
You know, I want a business that's good enough to

1373
01:03:51,480 --> 01:03:53,400
you know, just pay for my stuff and have a

1374
01:03:53,400 --> 01:03:55,679
decent family. We can have the same approach to your kids,

1375
01:03:56,119 --> 01:03:57,280
or you can say, you know, I want to build

1376
01:03:57,320 --> 01:03:58,960
a I want to build a great business. I want

1377
01:03:59,000 --> 01:04:01,159
to do something special. What if you had that approach

1378
01:04:01,159 --> 01:04:02,480
to your kids. You know, I want to I want

1379
01:04:02,519 --> 01:04:04,880
to do something that's not not necessarily easy to do,

1380
01:04:04,920 --> 01:04:06,559
but I know it's going to be worth it. My

1381
01:04:06,639 --> 01:04:09,800
parents knew for them that the greatest joy was not

1382
01:04:09,920 --> 01:04:12,480
just to you know, make sure the kids made it

1383
01:04:12,519 --> 01:04:14,679
out of the house alive and go on and do

1384
01:04:14,719 --> 01:04:16,440
your own thing. When my parents wanted to raise great

1385
01:04:16,519 --> 01:04:18,079
children that they would want to be with for the

1386
01:04:18,079 --> 01:04:19,880
rest of their life, and that the children would want

1387
01:04:19,920 --> 01:04:20,480
to be with them.

1388
01:04:20,880 --> 01:04:23,199
Speaker 1: And that's just a different level of effort. Yeah. Well,

1389
01:04:23,360 --> 01:04:25,719
we wanted them to know the Lord too. You know

1390
01:04:25,800 --> 01:04:28,480
that you've heard Donna and I tell that story. But

1391
01:04:29,840 --> 01:04:34,519
if your kids don't know the Lord, then, in my opinion,

1392
01:04:34,599 --> 01:04:38,199
is a catastrophic failure. Right, And so your kids are

1393
01:04:38,360 --> 01:04:40,719
not going to serve the Lord if they don't see

1394
01:04:40,800 --> 01:04:42,960
in you what it means to serve the Lord and

1395
01:04:43,000 --> 01:04:46,840
don't see the benefits of it. Right, So it's not

1396
01:04:46,960 --> 01:04:49,280
do what I say, it's do what I do. It's

1397
01:04:49,360 --> 01:04:52,519
always do what I do. Yes, And so what my

1398
01:04:52,880 --> 01:04:55,599
kids saw absolutes in us absolutes Where we were going

1399
01:04:55,639 --> 01:04:58,039
to be in church on Sunday. We went to a

1400
01:04:58,119 --> 01:05:01,559
church that had a huge church split. We left that

1401
01:05:01,679 --> 01:05:04,000
church started driving to Dallas. It's the only place we

1402
01:05:04,039 --> 01:05:06,159
could find what we thought was a full gospel church.

1403
01:05:06,400 --> 01:05:09,880
So we would leave our house on Sunday morning, hours

1404
01:05:09,920 --> 01:05:12,159
ahead of whom we normally would have had to leave

1405
01:05:12,440 --> 01:05:15,800
to be in church. My kids never even questioned, it

1406
01:05:15,920 --> 01:05:19,480
is normal. This is what we do. So come back

1407
01:05:19,519 --> 01:05:21,639
a few years. Garrett liked to do extreme things. So

1408
01:05:21,679 --> 01:05:23,760
what's the most extreme thing you can probably do is

1409
01:05:23,760 --> 01:05:26,599
probably motocross, right, And we went.

1410
01:05:26,559 --> 01:05:30,039
Speaker 3: To a couple of motocross events like Supercross, and I

1411
01:05:30,079 --> 01:05:33,400
was drooling, and I rode motorcycles.

1412
01:05:33,880 --> 01:05:35,880
Speaker 1: Right, I've always I've rode them since I was young.

1413
01:05:35,920 --> 01:05:38,400
Speaker 3: And I used to learn our neighbors growing up, they

1414
01:05:38,440 --> 01:05:40,000
had they had dirt bikes.

1415
01:05:40,960 --> 01:05:46,880
Speaker 1: So Garrett wanted to do motocross. Of course that petrified mother,

1416
01:05:47,039 --> 01:05:51,360
knowing that Garrett's extreme nature, but that's not what bothered me.

1417
01:05:51,559 --> 01:05:54,800
What bothered me was that the races were on Sundays,

1418
01:05:56,039 --> 01:05:57,840
and Garrett and.

1419
01:05:57,760 --> 01:06:02,639
Speaker 3: That was back then, or it's respected Sundays. The only

1420
01:06:02,679 --> 01:06:04,800
thing you could have chosen to do in the nineties

1421
01:06:04,920 --> 01:06:08,440
that had events on Sundays for kids was motocross. Everything else,

1422
01:06:08,480 --> 01:06:10,079
you know, the sport. There was no sports on Sunday.

1423
01:06:10,079 --> 01:06:12,360
Speaker 1: So all right, so all the rebels, the X gamer

1424
01:06:12,559 --> 01:06:15,519
guys that they all came out of that generation of

1425
01:06:15,960 --> 01:06:19,519
never going to church riding their motorcycles, and it was

1426
01:06:19,559 --> 01:06:22,960
absolute no. And so because of that, I never bought

1427
01:06:22,960 --> 01:06:26,559
Garrett a motorcycle because I know what that would have

1428
01:06:26,559 --> 01:06:28,760
been a temptation. That wouldn't be fair. Right, So you're

1429
01:06:28,760 --> 01:06:30,719
going to go ride motocross, but you can't ever go

1430
01:06:30,800 --> 01:06:33,639
to any of the events. So we just didn't do it.

1431
01:06:33,719 --> 01:06:39,119
And Karrot's pretty tenacious. It came up over and over again,

1432
01:06:39,199 --> 01:06:41,719
and the reason he was told was because we do

1433
01:06:41,800 --> 01:06:45,639
not put things in front of God. Ever, we don't

1434
01:06:45,639 --> 01:06:48,679
do it, we won't do it, and we didn't. And

1435
01:06:49,039 --> 01:06:51,599
that was that's a hard decision for a lot of

1436
01:06:51,599 --> 01:06:54,519
parents to make for some reason. But I told our

1437
01:06:54,639 --> 01:06:57,800
teams even back then, they started practicing on Wednesday nights

1438
01:06:57,800 --> 01:06:59,440
and stuff. And when I was the coach that I said,

1439
01:06:59,440 --> 01:07:03,800
we're not practicing Wednesday night. We will not play a game.

1440
01:07:04,159 --> 01:07:07,000
We'll forfeit if they schedule us a game on Wednesday night,

1441
01:07:07,559 --> 01:07:10,079
We're going to be in church. Yeah, And that's the

1442
01:07:10,079 --> 01:07:12,840
way it was. And you took it. I took a

1443
01:07:12,880 --> 01:07:15,480
stand with with boys club and whatever. And you know

1444
01:07:15,559 --> 01:07:18,039
how they figured it out. They just didn't schedule games

1445
01:07:18,039 --> 01:07:20,239
for us on those right, they figured it out.

1446
01:07:20,840 --> 01:07:22,360
Speaker 2: I really want to highlight that, and I do want

1447
01:07:22,360 --> 01:07:24,079
to get to your your big three things. I mean,

1448
01:07:24,239 --> 01:07:27,159
we're basically saying like, unfortunately there's not like our three

1449
01:07:27,199 --> 01:07:29,679
step growth hacked to great kids. You're gonna produce what

1450
01:07:29,719 --> 01:07:31,079
you are. You can teach what you know, but you're

1451
01:07:31,079 --> 01:07:32,480
gonna produce what you are. You said you want your

1452
01:07:32,519 --> 01:07:34,719
kids to do what you do now with with what

1453
01:07:34,760 --> 01:07:37,480
you just said about sports man that like and like

1454
01:07:37,519 --> 01:07:39,639
you said, I didn't even think about that sports used

1455
01:07:39,639 --> 01:07:42,480
to respect Sundays because like my son's seven and they

1456
01:07:42,480 --> 01:07:44,840
have a seven. You travel like tournament team as they

1457
01:07:44,840 --> 01:07:47,679
call them. It's not quite full travel ball yet at seven,

1458
01:07:47,800 --> 01:07:49,599
but like, listen to this. So I was kind of like, okay,

1459
01:07:50,000 --> 01:07:52,440
better better training, better kids to play with, like if

1460
01:07:52,440 --> 01:07:53,920
he can, if it's just what we're doing now, but

1461
01:07:53,920 --> 01:07:55,960
it's better, Like great, we'll pay for it, and like

1462
01:07:56,000 --> 01:07:58,239
if it's a better level. But here's a problem, as

1463
01:07:58,239 --> 01:08:00,920
I found out because didn't know any of this Gold's tournaments,

1464
01:08:00,960 --> 01:08:03,159
so like we play on the things in Saturdays and Sundays.

1465
01:08:03,239 --> 01:08:05,079
Now here's what was so deceptive. And I don't say

1466
01:08:05,079 --> 01:08:06,559
DECEPTI because I know I don't know this man, and

1467
01:08:06,559 --> 01:08:08,159
I don't know his heart. I think in his heart

1468
01:08:08,199 --> 01:08:09,920
he's trying to do a good thing. But to me,

1469
01:08:10,000 --> 01:08:11,840
based on what I know of you, this is like

1470
01:08:11,920 --> 01:08:13,880
a good thing that's that's not the best thing by

1471
01:08:13,880 --> 01:08:16,600
any stretch. He goes. For those of you who attend church,

1472
01:08:16,840 --> 01:08:18,880
I'll be doing a devotional with the boys every Sunday.

1473
01:08:18,880 --> 01:08:20,840
And I was like, well, that's positive, because it's better

1474
01:08:20,880 --> 01:08:23,640
than nothing. But then I thought, man, what are you

1475
01:08:24,720 --> 01:08:27,079
That's exactly what are you communicating to your kids? You

1476
01:08:27,119 --> 01:08:29,079
can find your own way. You can just say, look,

1477
01:08:29,399 --> 01:08:31,520
it doesn't matter what God says, you know, don't neglect

1478
01:08:31,520 --> 01:08:34,640
the gathering of believers, respect the Sabbath, yeah or yeah,

1479
01:08:34,680 --> 01:08:37,279
just figure out your own way to do both, And

1480
01:08:37,520 --> 01:08:39,239
no one would say that's what they're teaching their kids.

1481
01:08:39,359 --> 01:08:40,520
I don't know this man, Like I said, so, I

1482
01:08:40,520 --> 01:08:42,159
don't want to. I'm not throwing any shade. But if

1483
01:08:42,159 --> 01:08:43,479
I call him and said, hey, what are you teaching

1484
01:08:43,479 --> 01:08:45,439
your boys right now? You're telling them that you can

1485
01:08:45,439 --> 01:08:46,760
find your own way to do church. You don't have

1486
01:08:46,760 --> 01:08:48,680
to listen to what God says, that would be a

1487
01:08:48,760 --> 01:08:51,079
very harsh thing. But at the same time, I think

1488
01:08:51,119 --> 01:08:52,960
if if he was in relationship with me, that is

1489
01:08:53,000 --> 01:08:53,520
what I would say.

1490
01:08:53,640 --> 01:08:58,520
Speaker 3: And as it pertains to sports, I remember you and

1491
01:08:58,600 --> 01:09:00,199
I talked about this when I went and spoke at

1492
01:09:00,239 --> 01:09:02,840
the event for the professional baseball players, and I asked,

1493
01:09:02,880 --> 01:09:05,800
Matt Holiday, Yeah, Matt, I know, Matt's great. Is he

1494
01:09:05,840 --> 01:09:06,880
a Hall of Fame player?

1495
01:09:07,640 --> 01:09:09,960
Speaker 2: He's a legend. I don't I'm a check. I don't

1496
01:09:09,960 --> 01:09:10,319
know if he's in.

1497
01:09:10,279 --> 01:09:10,760
Speaker 1: The Hall of Fame.

1498
01:09:10,800 --> 01:09:14,000
Speaker 3: Either way, Matt Matt is a legendary Matt Holliday legendary

1499
01:09:14,000 --> 01:09:16,720
baseball player who has two sons that are that are

1500
01:09:16,720 --> 01:09:19,319
in the MLB has it, and he is a great

1501
01:09:19,359 --> 01:09:21,600
man of character. Him and his wife and all their

1502
01:09:21,640 --> 01:09:24,560
family follow God. A guy's opinion, who you can respect.

1503
01:09:24,920 --> 01:09:27,680
Legendary baseball player following after God, both of his children

1504
01:09:27,760 --> 01:09:28,399
following after God.

1505
01:09:28,439 --> 01:09:29,159
Speaker 1: And there in the MLB.

1506
01:09:29,319 --> 01:09:30,960
Speaker 2: He's in the Cardinals Hall of Fame, but not in

1507
01:09:31,000 --> 01:09:32,079
the MLB Hall.

1508
01:09:32,119 --> 01:09:35,079
Speaker 3: Okay, well, anyways, still player, I ask Matt, I go, Matt,

1509
01:09:35,119 --> 01:09:37,399
what do you think about Like, you know, you grew

1510
01:09:37,439 --> 01:09:39,039
up because I'm talking Matt's just a few years older

1511
01:09:39,039 --> 01:09:40,279
than me. I'm like, Matt, you grew up in the

1512
01:09:40,319 --> 01:09:42,680
age that I did. Sports was different for kids then

1513
01:09:42,760 --> 01:09:45,000
than it is now. Like what do you think of all?

1514
01:09:45,560 --> 01:09:47,319
Like how is it with your kids? What do you

1515
01:09:47,319 --> 01:09:49,359
think of the way sports is today for like seven

1516
01:09:49,439 --> 01:09:51,800
year olds and ten years old? And he said, look,

1517
01:09:51,840 --> 01:09:53,840
there's a lot of different ways to do things as

1518
01:09:53,880 --> 01:09:55,720
it pertains to baseball. And I thought this was a

1519
01:09:55,720 --> 01:09:58,560
great take. So as it pertains to baseball, there is

1520
01:09:58,600 --> 01:10:01,079
a certain number of baseball that you need to play

1521
01:10:01,159 --> 01:10:03,520
before you make it to the big show, and you're

1522
01:10:03,520 --> 01:10:05,439
going to play the majority, and you should play the

1523
01:10:05,760 --> 01:10:08,920
majority of that number of games in high school, college

1524
01:10:09,000 --> 01:10:11,319
and in the minor leagues. The number of games that

1525
01:10:11,399 --> 01:10:14,079
you play as a young person really does not have

1526
01:10:14,239 --> 01:10:17,760
any benefit to you becoming a great professional baseball player.

1527
01:10:18,039 --> 01:10:20,479
Speaker 2: And speaking from experience, because he's produced not only himself

1528
01:10:20,520 --> 01:10:23,119
but now his sons as like first round draft picks,

1529
01:10:23,159 --> 01:10:24,279
both Ethan and Jackson.

1530
01:10:24,399 --> 01:10:27,920
Speaker 1: So, well, you've heard me. You guys have mentioned me

1531
01:10:28,039 --> 01:10:31,359
talking about the word beside and I've put together a

1532
01:10:31,399 --> 01:10:33,640
series of messages and I'm in the process of writing

1533
01:10:33,640 --> 01:10:36,920
a book right now about it. And it's just come over,

1534
01:10:37,079 --> 01:10:38,880
you know, a decade of talking about it.

1535
01:10:39,039 --> 01:10:39,279
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1536
01:10:39,960 --> 01:10:42,760
Speaker 1: But in one of my first Decide messages, one of

1537
01:10:42,760 --> 01:10:45,159
the guys at our church, his kids are very good athletes.

1538
01:10:45,199 --> 01:10:47,119
He was a good athlete, college athlete, His kids were

1539
01:10:47,119 --> 01:10:53,439
good athletes. And I spoke about percentages of kids that

1540
01:10:53,560 --> 01:11:00,880
become pro athletes, and it's it's not as small as

1541
01:11:00,920 --> 01:11:03,680
becoming a Navy seal, but it's similar, right, So you

1542
01:11:03,720 --> 01:11:07,720
take hundreds of thousands of athletes and then you boil

1543
01:11:07,800 --> 01:11:09,880
that down to just a very few people that ever

1544
01:11:09,960 --> 01:11:13,640
make it. Now, this financial reward that have in college

1545
01:11:13,680 --> 01:11:15,840
now is pretty crazy. So there is at least a

1546
01:11:15,880 --> 01:11:18,399
step before the pros where you could make some money

1547
01:11:18,479 --> 01:11:20,319
or get your college paid for and that sort of thing.

1548
01:11:20,359 --> 01:11:23,159
But it's still like in a one percent to two

1549
01:11:23,159 --> 01:11:26,399
percent homes, very very low. And I said, what you're

1550
01:11:26,439 --> 01:11:31,279
showing your kids when you do these special leagues, these

1551
01:11:32,199 --> 01:11:36,520
these special groups whatever you want to call them, elite teams,

1552
01:11:37,239 --> 01:11:42,439
that that's more important than serving God. And it is not.

1553
01:11:43,279 --> 01:11:46,279
So you not only in my opinion, wasting thousands of dollars,

1554
01:11:46,960 --> 01:11:49,800
you're creating a presence in your child's life that sports

1555
01:11:49,840 --> 01:11:53,359
are more important. And it's not guys, in the grand

1556
01:11:53,439 --> 01:11:58,439
scheme of life. It's not even on them. Honestly, it's

1557
01:11:58,520 --> 01:12:02,520
not even on the scale. And there's I've always said.

1558
01:12:02,560 --> 01:12:04,920
I was talking to the guys last week. It's very funny.

1559
01:12:04,920 --> 01:12:06,520
I asked him. I said, well, you guys great athletes

1560
01:12:06,560 --> 01:12:09,479
at school, and they said we were great. Yeah, And

1561
01:12:09,520 --> 01:12:12,520
it's because great athletes are great athletes. I went to

1562
01:12:12,560 --> 01:12:15,439
school with some guys that were pros. They were great

1563
01:12:15,439 --> 01:12:18,680
at basketball, they were great at baseball, they were great

1564
01:12:18,680 --> 01:12:21,319
at football. They were the fastest guys in track. If

1565
01:12:21,319 --> 01:12:24,199
they wanted to play volleyball, they would dominate. If we

1566
01:12:24,199 --> 01:12:26,760
were playing dodgeball. They were the best guys on the field.

1567
01:12:27,239 --> 01:12:32,039
They were just incredibly gifted people. Yeah, didn't have to

1568
01:12:32,039 --> 01:12:35,840
do elite sports, didn't have to do. Your kids are

1569
01:12:35,840 --> 01:12:37,479
completely burned out on it by the time you get

1570
01:12:37,520 --> 01:12:38,199
out of high school.

1571
01:12:38,239 --> 01:12:40,159
Speaker 3: The way you say it is, if your kid's a

1572
01:12:40,199 --> 01:12:45,039
pro athlete, you'll know, they'll know. Everybody else Know's likely

1573
01:12:45,039 --> 01:12:45,479
what you say.

1574
01:12:45,840 --> 01:12:48,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, no one's got to tell you. Yeah, everybody will know.

1575
01:12:49,159 --> 01:12:49,479
Speaker 1: Yeah.

1576
01:12:49,520 --> 01:12:52,720
Speaker 2: It's funny because Austin Hedges the catcher and sometimes pitcher

1577
01:12:52,760 --> 01:12:55,520
for the Clevelands. He was saying, it's like, dude, he's like,

1578
01:12:55,560 --> 01:12:58,279
I was the best athlete when I was twelve. He said,

1579
01:12:58,319 --> 01:13:02,159
that was very peaked. All right, so we, like I said,

1580
01:13:02,199 --> 01:13:03,720
you're gonna teach what you know, but you're gonna produce

1581
01:13:03,720 --> 01:13:05,479
a yard. Let's get to your three things, Pops. I

1582
01:13:05,520 --> 01:13:07,640
think this will probably be more like tools and tactics style,

1583
01:13:07,840 --> 01:13:09,680
to just get into the three things that you that

1584
01:13:09,800 --> 01:13:11,920
you say and we've we've touched on them, but I

1585
01:13:12,000 --> 01:13:14,479
want you to go deeper. Number one thing you said,

1586
01:13:14,920 --> 01:13:17,239
and it's amazing, it's not much of a shock. You

1587
01:13:17,279 --> 01:13:17,640
have a cup.

1588
01:13:18,199 --> 01:13:20,119
Speaker 3: Before we're going to three, I want to just summarize

1589
01:13:20,159 --> 01:13:23,560
everything well covered to give the three. I hope what

1590
01:13:23,600 --> 01:13:27,199
you would take away from Pops talking about how what

1591
01:13:27,279 --> 01:13:30,079
type of father he was to me, is that you

1592
01:13:30,119 --> 01:13:32,640
can get an idea. It's not it's not how do

1593
01:13:32,680 --> 01:13:34,640
you be Pops the same way that you've said to

1594
01:13:34,880 --> 01:13:37,399
you say about me, like, don't try to be Garrett. Yeah, right,

1595
01:13:37,680 --> 01:13:39,439
But I hope you can take lessons away from my

1596
01:13:39,520 --> 01:13:42,000
life and and how do you relate them to you.

1597
01:13:42,560 --> 01:13:45,239
Look at who Pops was to me, to my sister,

1598
01:13:45,359 --> 01:13:47,319
the type of man that he is, and help that

1599
01:13:47,439 --> 01:13:50,399
give you an on ramp, give you some ideas to

1600
01:13:50,479 --> 01:13:52,920
create a picture of what my dad did have As

1601
01:13:52,960 --> 01:13:54,720
he knew what he wanted, he knew who he wanted

1602
01:13:54,720 --> 01:13:56,800
to be, he saw who my grandpa was. He says,

1603
01:13:56,960 --> 01:13:58,199
I don't want to be that type of father. I

1604
01:13:58,239 --> 01:14:00,159
want to be this type of father. And then he

1605
01:14:00,199 --> 01:14:02,720
got lessons along the way Pastor Keith spoken to him.

1606
01:14:02,760 --> 01:14:03,960
Speaker 1: He saw things.

1607
01:14:03,960 --> 01:14:05,680
Speaker 3: He says, Okay, I'm going to add that in and

1608
01:14:05,720 --> 01:14:07,199
I'm just going to be faithful and I'm going to

1609
01:14:07,279 --> 01:14:09,800
pursue the dream and the vision I have for my family.

1610
01:14:10,159 --> 01:14:12,840
That's how you do it. So don't try to be Pops.

1611
01:14:12,880 --> 01:14:14,600
If there's stuff in your life where it's like, well

1612
01:14:14,640 --> 01:14:16,199
he did that and I've already messed that up. Don't

1613
01:14:16,239 --> 01:14:18,840
worry about all that, right, Let pops his life and

1614
01:14:18,880 --> 01:14:21,399
Pops his story create a picture for you of here's

1615
01:14:21,439 --> 01:14:22,960
what I want with my kids, and then I'm going

1616
01:14:23,000 --> 01:14:24,039
to stay faithful after this.

1617
01:14:25,880 --> 01:14:27,159
Speaker 1: Thank you very much for listening.

1618
01:14:27,199 --> 01:14:31,039
Speaker 2: Guys, remember to share, like subscribe. If you think that

1619
01:14:31,119 --> 01:14:33,600
this would be something that someone would enjoy, please send

1620
01:14:33,640 --> 01:14:35,600
it to him. We appreciate it all. If you want

1621
01:14:35,640 --> 01:14:38,000
to get in touch, you can follow us on Instagram

1622
01:14:38,039 --> 01:14:40,760
at the Impossible Life. You'll find us on there. You

1623
01:14:40,760 --> 01:14:44,680
can also email at Impossible Life Podcasts at gmail dot

1624
01:14:44,720 --> 01:14:46,560
com if you have any questions. If you want to

1625
01:14:46,600 --> 01:14:48,680
get in touch and find out about Garrett's personal or

1626
01:14:48,720 --> 01:14:51,199
business coaching, that's the way to do it. Thank you

1627
01:14:51,239 --> 01:14:54,119
again for listening. Go out there and think better and

1628
01:14:54,199 --> 01:14:56,000
live the impossible. You see again sooner