WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.560 --> 00:00:03.640 I was at an event this weekend for a friend 2 00:00:03.879 --> 00:00:08.439 at a friend's place, and I had this interesting conversation 3 00:00:08.599 --> 00:00:17.559 about trusting people and knowing who your friends are. Welcome 4 00:00:17.559 --> 00:00:21.839 to the Transformation Station podcast. I'm Christina, owner, operator, and 5 00:00:21.920 --> 00:00:24.960 founder of the Transformation Station, and this is where we 6 00:00:25.039 --> 00:00:28.600 talk about getting stronger while navigating real life. If you're 7 00:00:28.600 --> 00:00:31.760 trying to stay consistent through the ups and the downs 8 00:00:31.800 --> 00:00:35.719 and everywhere else in between, this is for you. Today's 9 00:00:35.719 --> 00:00:39.719 episode might also resonate with you because maybe you're friends 10 00:00:39.719 --> 00:00:43.399 with your coworkers, or maybe you also run a business 11 00:00:43.479 --> 00:00:46.479 and your clients are awesome and you don't really know 12 00:00:46.600 --> 00:00:50.439 where that line is or how exactly you're supposed to 13 00:00:50.439 --> 00:00:53.119 be showing up. And I when I first opened the 14 00:00:53.159 --> 00:00:58.520 Transformation Station, and this also goes back like far far, 15 00:00:58.640 --> 00:01:01.280 even when I was young in family business as well, 16 00:01:01.320 --> 00:01:03.799 because we always had staff and by the time I 17 00:01:03.840 --> 00:01:07.400 was fourteen years old, I was already training staff for 18 00:01:07.519 --> 00:01:10.680 our family business as well. So's there's a fine line 19 00:01:10.719 --> 00:01:13.519 between like who is your friend who wants what version 20 00:01:13.560 --> 00:01:16.599 of you? And like your co workers are your coworkers, 21 00:01:17.359 --> 00:01:19.439 And some people get friendly with their co workers when 22 00:01:19.439 --> 00:01:21.920 they don't really know who to trust and in the 23 00:01:21.920 --> 00:01:26.280 Transformation Station, I do have that. I have that with 24 00:01:26.719 --> 00:01:32.159 my incredible, fantastic, amazing members and also my incredible, fantastic, 25 00:01:32.280 --> 00:01:36.159 amazing staff as well. And this is something that a 26 00:01:36.159 --> 00:01:39.120 couple of years ago, before I grew into the new 27 00:01:39.159 --> 00:01:43.599 location at Cedar Point Drive, I was actually pretty closed off. 28 00:01:43.640 --> 00:01:46.239 And I've said this before. There was one time for 29 00:01:46.280 --> 00:01:48.680 three months I didn't even step foot into my own 30 00:01:48.680 --> 00:01:52.200 business because I was so like, I was distraught and 31 00:01:52.239 --> 00:01:56.280 I was overwhelmed. And thankfully that ship has sailed. I've 32 00:01:56.280 --> 00:01:59.000 had a lot of life changes since then, and I've 33 00:01:59.239 --> 00:02:01.840 learned from those. I learned how to pivot even more 34 00:02:01.879 --> 00:02:05.120 so now in that, but I've also learned how to 35 00:02:06.159 --> 00:02:10.080 I'm gonna say, like, be aware but also take a chance, 36 00:02:10.400 --> 00:02:13.759 because like, if my expectation of people are super high, 37 00:02:13.840 --> 00:02:18.159 especially like in friendships, then eventually people get hurt, right, 38 00:02:18.520 --> 00:02:21.639 But at the same time, it's learning how to not 39 00:02:21.840 --> 00:02:24.719 just let your like, not just let your got up. 40 00:02:24.759 --> 00:02:29.840 But building those walls sometimes comes naturally, especially when we've 41 00:02:29.840 --> 00:02:32.759 been hurt so many times. And I've had people come 42 00:02:32.759 --> 00:02:37.400 through the Transformation Station before and they're excited about fitness, 43 00:02:37.639 --> 00:02:40.520 they eat breathe, sleep, fitness, and all of a sudden 44 00:02:40.560 --> 00:02:43.280 that's what they're interested in. So a few months go 45 00:02:43.319 --> 00:02:45.479 by and they're like, this is the best ever and 46 00:02:45.560 --> 00:02:47.879 Christina is awesome, and I want Christina to be my 47 00:02:47.919 --> 00:02:50.120 best friend, and you have to come out with us 48 00:02:50.120 --> 00:02:51.719 and do this with us, and this is amazing, and 49 00:02:51.759 --> 00:02:53.919 I want to be in all of Christina's classes. And 50 00:02:53.960 --> 00:02:57.479 then all of a sudden, they just poof disappear. They 51 00:02:57.479 --> 00:02:59.719 don't answer my messages anymore, they don't want to be 52 00:02:59.719 --> 00:03:02.759 my friend anymore. Sometimes I still have a membership, sometimes 53 00:03:02.879 --> 00:03:06.159 end up canceling their membership, and it literally has nothing 54 00:03:06.199 --> 00:03:08.680 to do with me. I mean sometimes I think about that, 55 00:03:08.759 --> 00:03:11.400 of course, because you will when you have someone who's 56 00:03:11.439 --> 00:03:14.319 a coworker, let's say, at work, and all of a 57 00:03:14.319 --> 00:03:18.639 sudden they're not employed by that same business or profession 58 00:03:19.080 --> 00:03:21.639 or whichever, and then all of a sudden, you guys 59 00:03:21.639 --> 00:03:25.159 were super super close, and then that common denominator shifts 60 00:03:25.159 --> 00:03:28.800 because now you don't have the same employee. It's hard 61 00:03:28.879 --> 00:03:32.319 not to think like, oh, that person doesn't like me anymore. 62 00:03:32.400 --> 00:03:35.439 Did I do something wrong? Or is it because it 63 00:03:35.479 --> 00:03:38.159 was convenient at the time, Because that's something that they 64 00:03:38.159 --> 00:03:42.039 were interested in. And I have alliterated that so many 65 00:03:42.120 --> 00:03:43.919 times with people when they try to get close to me, 66 00:03:43.960 --> 00:03:46.439 I'm like, listen, it takes me a long long time 67 00:03:46.879 --> 00:03:49.840 for me to go to somebody's house. If I go 68 00:03:49.919 --> 00:03:53.039 to your house and you've invited me there and I've 69 00:03:53.199 --> 00:03:57.039 actually showed up and went, that's a pretty big deal 70 00:03:57.120 --> 00:03:59.599 because I don't even invite people to my own home, 71 00:04:00.280 --> 00:04:03.639 very very particular on that. I also don't go to 72 00:04:03.639 --> 00:04:06.520 anybody's houses. To me, that's like the whole another level. 73 00:04:07.000 --> 00:04:09.719 And it's hard because, like I think, I show up 74 00:04:09.800 --> 00:04:15.159 pretty transparently in my business. I'm not always super raw raw, raw, 75 00:04:15.240 --> 00:04:18.879 high energy. My I guess my medium energy sometimes with 76 00:04:18.959 --> 00:04:21.160 some people's high energy. But take what you need from that. 77 00:04:23.279 --> 00:04:27.480 So there's the like, I have not different versions of me, 78 00:04:27.600 --> 00:04:31.000 but I have different levels of intimacy of me. So 79 00:04:31.240 --> 00:04:33.319 the way I look at the different levels of intimacy 80 00:04:33.439 --> 00:04:38.120 is like my my standard level of intimacy is like 81 00:04:38.199 --> 00:04:40.519 for most people, right, like, hey, how are you doing? 82 00:04:41.279 --> 00:04:44.920 Share a few personal things. That's pretty much where it lies. 83 00:04:44.959 --> 00:04:47.480 People share some personal things with me and we call 84 00:04:47.519 --> 00:04:49.639 it a day, We go on, we high five whichever 85 00:04:49.759 --> 00:04:52.000 maybe even that base level, we're not even high fiving. 86 00:04:52.399 --> 00:04:54.079 I don't know. I like to high five. I'm a 87 00:04:54.160 --> 00:04:58.120 high fiver. I'm a handshaker, so I'm not overly a hugger. 88 00:04:58.199 --> 00:05:01.319 Unless someone is like, oh yeah, reel it in, I'm like, oh, okay, cool. 89 00:05:01.319 --> 00:05:04.560 I'm not offended by hugs, but I don't usually go 90 00:05:04.680 --> 00:05:07.879 for a hug first. And then there's different levels. So 91 00:05:07.959 --> 00:05:11.759 like my my friends, friends that I've known for a 92 00:05:11.800 --> 00:05:14.480 long time, I would kind of schedule those under a schedule. 93 00:05:14.519 --> 00:05:17.800 I would sort those under, let's say the acquaintance zone. 94 00:05:18.480 --> 00:05:21.040 And then there's of course, like my good friends, my 95 00:05:21.079 --> 00:05:24.480 close friends, my daily friends. There's some members that I 96 00:05:24.560 --> 00:05:26.959 have known for a very very long time. They may 97 00:05:27.040 --> 00:05:30.199 have a different level of intimacy with me based on 98 00:05:30.360 --> 00:05:33.399 we've known each other for longer, which means we've shared 99 00:05:33.439 --> 00:05:36.680 a little more intimate stories with each other because we've 100 00:05:36.680 --> 00:05:40.399 had time to learn each other and trust each other 101 00:05:40.399 --> 00:05:43.920 and understand each other as well. Then there's like my family. 102 00:05:44.600 --> 00:05:48.000 What level of intimacy is my family? They know me 103 00:05:48.079 --> 00:05:52.040 since forever, since I was born. And then there's there's 104 00:05:52.040 --> 00:05:54.879 my partner. There's Chris, and she gets every level of 105 00:05:54.920 --> 00:05:58.160 intimacy with me that I don't share with anybody else. 106 00:05:58.439 --> 00:06:01.480 So it's interesting to see like what those different levels 107 00:06:01.560 --> 00:06:06.199 are and where you can put your trust. And I've 108 00:06:06.199 --> 00:06:09.000 had people show up in the gym and they've been 109 00:06:09.079 --> 00:06:11.519 really excited and they want to be my friend, and 110 00:06:11.519 --> 00:06:13.519 then all of a sudden they just poof disappear. It's 111 00:06:13.560 --> 00:06:15.920 not my first rodeo, like that is something that is 112 00:06:15.959 --> 00:06:19.639 so common in business because it's like, firstly, and actually, 113 00:06:20.160 --> 00:06:23.240 I had this conversation with this person where I went 114 00:06:23.240 --> 00:06:26.079 to her home this past weekend and it was such 115 00:06:26.079 --> 00:06:28.560 a great time. I'm so happy that I went. And 116 00:06:28.639 --> 00:06:31.240 driving there, I'm I kid you not, Like this person 117 00:06:31.319 --> 00:06:34.959 is amazing and I know that I enjoy them, Like 118 00:06:35.240 --> 00:06:38.040 we have such a good friendship. We're very like transparent 119 00:06:38.079 --> 00:06:41.600 with each other. And I was walking into a place 120 00:06:41.639 --> 00:06:43.959 where I didn't know anybody. Thankfully, there was like three 121 00:06:44.040 --> 00:06:45.959 or four people that walked in after that I did know, 122 00:06:46.079 --> 00:06:48.079 so that was pretty cool. But like I met so 123 00:06:48.120 --> 00:06:50.480 many people and I shook hands and I gave some compliments, 124 00:06:50.519 --> 00:06:54.319 genuine compliments, and like it was a really fantastic time. 125 00:06:54.680 --> 00:06:56.879 But when I was driving there, I'm like, oh no, 126 00:06:57.040 --> 00:06:59.040 I'm going to say something that's going to ruin my 127 00:06:59.120 --> 00:07:03.800 image of what people think of me. I'm like, this 128 00:07:03.879 --> 00:07:06.160 is going to be no bueno. This is not going 129 00:07:06.199 --> 00:07:09.560 to be great because like one time I had a 130 00:07:09.600 --> 00:07:13.240 member and her and I became friends, and her partner 131 00:07:13.279 --> 00:07:15.399 at the time. I don't even know if they're still 132 00:07:15.439 --> 00:07:19.759 together because they ghosted me. But like I was invited 133 00:07:20.480 --> 00:07:26.279 with her to go to yoga. So I don't do yoga. 134 00:07:26.560 --> 00:07:29.120 I don't do yoga. I mean, like I like distretch 135 00:07:29.160 --> 00:07:33.040 and I like yoga. But it was a quiet class 136 00:07:33.480 --> 00:07:35.560 and there was like almost no music. I can't even 137 00:07:35.560 --> 00:07:37.720 tell you if there was music on. So I was 138 00:07:37.759 --> 00:07:40.480 in that class and there it was just a common 139 00:07:41.120 --> 00:07:44.000 drop in style class of like one of the city 140 00:07:44.040 --> 00:07:46.160 centers I was was years ago. I'm like, all right, 141 00:07:46.720 --> 00:07:49.279 whatever you asked me twenty five thousand times, I should 142 00:07:49.279 --> 00:07:54.759 probably accept your information, your invitation. So I went to 143 00:07:54.959 --> 00:07:56.920 do something that she wanted to do because it would 144 00:07:56.920 --> 00:07:59.600 make her happy. Well, it did not make her happy 145 00:07:59.720 --> 00:08:03.319 because when I met with her firstly, she shushed me 146 00:08:03.399 --> 00:08:06.800 joring yoga. I haven't shushed during yoga, which I'm like, 147 00:08:06.839 --> 00:08:09.279 I told you, But I wasn't like I wasn't having 148 00:08:09.279 --> 00:08:12.839 a conversation. I was like, ooh ah, like that just 149 00:08:12.920 --> 00:08:15.560 naturally comes out of my mouth because there's this was 150 00:08:15.600 --> 00:08:20.639 not a beginner yogurt, yo yogurt exactly my point. It 151 00:08:20.680 --> 00:08:23.959 was not beginner all body types friendly. It was this 152 00:08:24.040 --> 00:08:27.560 is what you do. There's no modifications, there's no moving 153 00:08:27.600 --> 00:08:29.639 away for your unique body. So I went and I 154 00:08:29.639 --> 00:08:32.759 did my best, and there's sometimes where I surprised myself. 155 00:08:32.799 --> 00:08:37.200 I was like, so eventually, I guess she's a more 156 00:08:37.200 --> 00:08:40.639 introverted person. She was embarrassed. Sorry, I told you I 157 00:08:40.639 --> 00:08:42.960 don't do yoga. You know me enough that you should 158 00:08:42.960 --> 00:08:44.799 not have asked me twenty five times to go to yoga. 159 00:08:45.039 --> 00:08:46.559 But I wanted to be a good friend because I 160 00:08:46.559 --> 00:08:48.000 don't always want to do what I want to do. 161 00:08:48.080 --> 00:08:50.360 I want to do what she wants to do. And honestly, 162 00:08:50.360 --> 00:08:52.039 I'm like, cool, I can go for a stretch. It 163 00:08:52.120 --> 00:08:54.639 was not a stretch. It was like a full blown activity. 164 00:08:55.639 --> 00:08:58.000 But I was there for a good time, and apparently 165 00:08:58.000 --> 00:08:59.480 I should not have been there for a good time. 166 00:09:00.159 --> 00:09:01.840 After when we're packing up, she was a little bit 167 00:09:01.840 --> 00:09:04.480 like stand offish, So I was trying to make conversation. 168 00:09:04.600 --> 00:09:07.679 We're walking to our cars. I'm go, yeah, how's things 169 00:09:07.759 --> 00:09:11.480 like how's your partner? How's your your pets? And she 170 00:09:11.600 --> 00:09:13.320 turned to me and she's like, why are you asking 171 00:09:13.360 --> 00:09:16.600 how my partner is? And I'm like, because that's like 172 00:09:16.799 --> 00:09:20.399 what you do? I think, like how are you? How's 173 00:09:20.399 --> 00:09:23.720 your pets? How's your animals? And then she's like do 174 00:09:23.799 --> 00:09:26.279 you like her? And I'm like wait, wait, sorry what 175 00:09:27.279 --> 00:09:29.639 I'm like, no, I'm just asking how she is? And 176 00:09:29.679 --> 00:09:31.879 I just asked how your your bunny is. You're not 177 00:09:32.000 --> 00:09:35.320 asking me if I like your bunny? Like what the fuck? 178 00:09:35.879 --> 00:09:39.240 I'm gonna mark this as explicit. So I was just 179 00:09:39.240 --> 00:09:42.639 like really caught off guard. And then she was like okay, 180 00:09:42.840 --> 00:09:46.679 whatever then and she literally stormed off. She emailed me 181 00:09:46.720 --> 00:09:50.559 the next day asked me to cancel her membership. Her 182 00:09:50.600 --> 00:09:53.559 then girlfriend at the time also emailed me to cancel 183 00:09:53.600 --> 00:09:56.559 her membership, and I was like, you're kidding me, right, 184 00:09:57.120 --> 00:09:58.919 Like all I wanted to do was make her happy 185 00:09:58.919 --> 00:10:01.879 by going to yoga, and honestly I didn't love it, 186 00:10:02.080 --> 00:10:06.960 but I was neutral during it because I wanted to 187 00:10:07.039 --> 00:10:08.720 be like, you know, like when you have a friendship, 188 00:10:08.720 --> 00:10:10.639 you can't always do it one person always wants to do. 189 00:10:11.279 --> 00:10:13.240 And now I realize that because I told her no 190 00:10:13.320 --> 00:10:15.000 so many times, I should have just stuck to my word. 191 00:10:15.399 --> 00:10:18.759 I don't know if I classify that under people pleasing, 192 00:10:18.799 --> 00:10:22.120 because that was like, that was a common like Okay, 193 00:10:22.159 --> 00:10:24.279 I'm gonna go. It wasn't like she forced me to. 194 00:10:24.879 --> 00:10:29.679 I accepted the invitation after how many times? And I 195 00:10:29.759 --> 00:10:33.679 know myself, but I thought maybe I would try something new. 196 00:10:33.759 --> 00:10:36.200 I haven't tried yoga in a very very very long time. 197 00:10:36.639 --> 00:10:38.240 So I'm like, you know what, I'll just go. It's 198 00:10:38.240 --> 00:10:41.879 no skin off my back. It might be a great thing. 199 00:10:41.919 --> 00:10:44.080 Maybe I'll fall in love with yoga. I most certainly 200 00:10:44.080 --> 00:10:48.759 did not, and that burnt me. I'm like, okay, so 201 00:10:49.000 --> 00:10:51.440 I've been to your house how many times just hanging out. 202 00:10:52.399 --> 00:10:55.240 You know, my spouse. I was in a relationship and 203 00:10:55.279 --> 00:10:57.320 still in the same relationship back in the day when 204 00:10:57.360 --> 00:11:01.399 that happened. So I was very very confused on that. 205 00:11:02.399 --> 00:11:04.799 So that's just one of the very many stories that 206 00:11:04.840 --> 00:11:08.480 have have happened. Sometimes it's not as like big and 207 00:11:08.600 --> 00:11:11.039 like such like a detailed story. And I've actually never 208 00:11:11.080 --> 00:11:14.320 told anybody that story. Well Chris knows, of course, And 209 00:11:14.399 --> 00:11:17.960 like my mom but oh yeah, and a few, like 210 00:11:18.000 --> 00:11:20.360 of the coaches because I've told them they don't even 211 00:11:20.360 --> 00:11:22.960 know who that person is. Nobody really will because it 212 00:11:22.960 --> 00:11:26.159 was that long ago. But like, yeah, like there's sometimes 213 00:11:26.639 --> 00:11:30.399 it's a just a like a quiet type of fade 214 00:11:30.440 --> 00:11:34.360 away because they either liked me because they wanted to 215 00:11:34.480 --> 00:11:36.960 use my energy and my motivation because they wanted to 216 00:11:36.960 --> 00:11:40.519 get closer to their goals, and they thought that that's 217 00:11:40.559 --> 00:11:45.440 all it took. But then the nostalgic of fitness sometimes 218 00:11:45.480 --> 00:11:48.000 for some people, not everybody, but for some people that 219 00:11:48.039 --> 00:11:50.879 come in super hot, it starts to fade away. And 220 00:11:51.000 --> 00:11:54.159 it could fade away because their job changes. It could 221 00:11:54.159 --> 00:11:59.360 fade away because mainly like their their energy can change, 222 00:11:59.480 --> 00:12:03.840 or they're they have life milestones that change. A lot 223 00:12:03.840 --> 00:12:07.559 of people come in because they're getting married and then 224 00:12:07.679 --> 00:12:11.559 after the wedding they just kind of disappear. And like, 225 00:12:11.639 --> 00:12:15.960 I see that a lot, a lot a lot in fitness. 226 00:12:15.960 --> 00:12:18.519 Something that sticks out in my mind. This is actually 227 00:12:18.519 --> 00:12:22.480 a really fun story. There's someone that I I'm gonna 228 00:12:22.480 --> 00:12:24.960 say I because we're talking about levels of intimacy, a 229 00:12:25.000 --> 00:12:28.279 fellow business owner and we were acquaintances and I cheer 230 00:12:28.360 --> 00:12:31.320 her from a distance because we're on different sides of 231 00:12:31.360 --> 00:12:35.039 Barry and she cheers me and we're always on Instagram together. 232 00:12:35.120 --> 00:12:40.559 But her husband, she ordered him a suit and it 233 00:12:40.759 --> 00:12:43.879 was a skinny suit. It was a fantastic looking suit, 234 00:12:44.320 --> 00:12:48.600 and it was a couple sizes too small. So all 235 00:12:48.639 --> 00:12:51.679 of a sudden, I saw this person every single day 236 00:12:52.480 --> 00:12:54.840 and he made it pretty transparent. He's like, I'm here 237 00:12:54.879 --> 00:12:57.440 because I need to fit into my suit. And then 238 00:12:57.480 --> 00:12:59.639 as soon as the wedding happened, I was like, dude, 239 00:13:00.399 --> 00:13:02.480 where are you going, Like are you coming back? Because 240 00:13:02.519 --> 00:13:06.080 we got along super well and actually got along really 241 00:13:06.080 --> 00:13:08.919 well with with my spouse, with with Chris, so like 242 00:13:08.960 --> 00:13:13.120 they worked out really fantastic together and yeah, and then 243 00:13:13.200 --> 00:13:15.480 all of a sudden, he's like, nuh girl, Like I 244 00:13:15.559 --> 00:13:18.039 fit in my suit. I don't need to fit in 245 00:13:18.039 --> 00:13:21.399 my student anymore. Peace out. I'm like, okay, that's fine, 246 00:13:21.399 --> 00:13:24.799 I'm gonna miss you. But it was like a mutual thing. 247 00:13:24.879 --> 00:13:26.440 I was like, Nope, I don't I don't want to 248 00:13:26.440 --> 00:13:29.559 do that anymore. And that's pretty much it. Like he's 249 00:13:29.559 --> 00:13:32.480 still active on the outside of the gym, doing like 250 00:13:32.559 --> 00:13:36.039 everyday things, but he's no longer in the transformation station 251 00:13:36.240 --> 00:13:38.840 and there's no bad blood on that. Like I can 252 00:13:38.879 --> 00:13:42.360 say like, hey, I really appreciated his time with us, 253 00:13:42.840 --> 00:13:45.120 and he can say, hey, thanks, you did me very 254 00:13:45.120 --> 00:13:47.600 well because he fit in his suit and it looks fantastic. 255 00:13:48.120 --> 00:13:52.159 So like there's there's a common I guess respect for 256 00:13:52.159 --> 00:13:55.200 for people. But sometimes people people don't know that. Like 257 00:13:55.519 --> 00:13:57.840 they come into a business and they want the business 258 00:13:57.919 --> 00:14:01.279 version of you. They see you as sometimes the business 259 00:14:01.480 --> 00:14:05.360 or sometimes just the business owner, or they sometimes look 260 00:14:05.399 --> 00:14:07.399 at you like you're an object in the room and 261 00:14:07.399 --> 00:14:10.000 they don't realize like, oh, that's just the cost of business, 262 00:14:10.000 --> 00:14:12.919 but they don't realize that you are a person. You 263 00:14:13.000 --> 00:14:16.720 are someone who is navigating life outside of owning a 264 00:14:16.759 --> 00:14:20.919 business and life inside owning the business as well. Like me, 265 00:14:21.000 --> 00:14:23.440 I'm very involved in my business, which for a lot 266 00:14:23.480 --> 00:14:26.759 of business owners at this stage, they're not very involved 267 00:14:26.840 --> 00:14:32.240 in their business. So it's navigating like what is the 268 00:14:32.240 --> 00:14:34.919 business version of me and what is not? And I'm 269 00:14:34.919 --> 00:14:37.200 not going to sit here and cry about that because 270 00:14:37.320 --> 00:14:40.960 I know from when I was thirteen fourteen years old, 271 00:14:41.000 --> 00:14:43.840 because I trained my mom's staff, we became friends. Some 272 00:14:43.879 --> 00:14:46.399 of them watched me grow up. Some my mom's staff 273 00:14:46.440 --> 00:14:48.360 worked for her for over ten years. I don't know 274 00:14:48.360 --> 00:14:53.279 how I didn't. Oh, speaking of that, my mom just 275 00:14:53.320 --> 00:14:56.600 agreed to coming onto this podcast, So hold on to 276 00:14:56.720 --> 00:14:59.360 the table. It's going to be a very interesting one. 277 00:14:59.360 --> 00:15:03.000 Make sure you too in So, yeah, it's it's like 278 00:15:03.279 --> 00:15:04.879 I learned that from when I was young, because I 279 00:15:04.879 --> 00:15:07.200 also saw this happen with my mom as well, Like 280 00:15:07.320 --> 00:15:10.000 you make friendships. Your staff are awesome. If I didn't 281 00:15:10.000 --> 00:15:12.360 believe in my staff, they wouldn't be here. So of 282 00:15:12.399 --> 00:15:15.039 course I like them. Of course I enjoy them. So 283 00:15:15.080 --> 00:15:18.799 it's interesting. And because we are such a small group, 284 00:15:19.840 --> 00:15:22.080 a lot of people in the workplace, they automatically if 285 00:15:22.120 --> 00:15:24.279 they have let's say, a corporate background, or they're used 286 00:15:24.279 --> 00:15:28.639 to working for like a union business, there's they're used 287 00:15:28.679 --> 00:15:31.159 to having like all these different levels of seniority and 288 00:15:31.200 --> 00:15:33.159 who's mean to who, and who loves each other and 289 00:15:33.200 --> 00:15:35.559 who gets who gets along and who goes for wine 290 00:15:35.840 --> 00:15:39.519 after work or beers or whatever the cases. But in 291 00:15:39.559 --> 00:15:44.080 this small business, we don't have that because I am 292 00:15:44.159 --> 00:15:48.679 involved in there, and the our employees here are fantastic. 293 00:15:48.960 --> 00:15:51.679 So it's like, there's not like that weird, like he said, 294 00:15:51.720 --> 00:15:55.440 she said, And when like a client goes to a business, 295 00:15:55.759 --> 00:15:58.399 let's say a big box business or whichever. They can 296 00:15:58.480 --> 00:16:02.960 start like kind of like putting their little hands in 297 00:16:03.000 --> 00:16:04.799 there and trying to like twist things and be like, 298 00:16:04.799 --> 00:16:08.240 oh oh. Then all of a sudden you have a 299 00:16:08.279 --> 00:16:10.639 group of ten staff that don't like each other because 300 00:16:10.639 --> 00:16:13.159 they let their clientele walk all over them and complain 301 00:16:13.559 --> 00:16:15.600 and put an ego when the other person's head to 302 00:16:15.600 --> 00:16:19.000 blow them up. But when that happens, it doesn't happen 303 00:16:19.120 --> 00:16:21.879 very often at all, very very very scarce. But when 304 00:16:21.919 --> 00:16:24.159 that happens and someone says, well, I like this person 305 00:16:24.200 --> 00:16:26.240 as an instructor and not this person. I like you 306 00:16:26.279 --> 00:16:29.279 as an instructor and not that person, don't forget I 307 00:16:29.720 --> 00:16:34.200 own the business and I need our coaches and our instructors, 308 00:16:34.320 --> 00:16:37.919 and our front desk staff and our ambassadors to run 309 00:16:38.120 --> 00:16:40.080 the business. So when someone comes up to me and 310 00:16:40.159 --> 00:16:42.080 they say, hey, that was a great class. You're welcome, 311 00:16:42.200 --> 00:16:46.200 thank you, that's awesome, I am so thankful. This used 312 00:16:46.200 --> 00:16:50.240 to happen back in the day, but I changed how 313 00:16:50.279 --> 00:16:54.120 I respond to some of the feedback because I will 314 00:16:54.120 --> 00:16:56.519 not tear down my own team with my own hands. 315 00:16:56.840 --> 00:16:58.600 So when someone comes a me like, Oh, you're such 316 00:16:58.600 --> 00:17:01.159 a good instructor. Oh, you're the best instructor. I'm like, 317 00:17:01.480 --> 00:17:04.880 I'm really glad that you enjoyed my class. Everyone here 318 00:17:04.920 --> 00:17:07.519 is making the same pizza recipe, and I'm not going 319 00:17:07.599 --> 00:17:10.839 to let that ego go to my head and then 320 00:17:11.119 --> 00:17:13.119 be like, oh, I'm the best instructor. I don't want 321 00:17:13.160 --> 00:17:14.960 to be my best instructor. I want all of us 322 00:17:15.039 --> 00:17:17.759 to be the best instructor. I want every single member 323 00:17:17.799 --> 00:17:20.000 to be able to go to every single person's class 324 00:17:20.279 --> 00:17:23.599 and have a freaking fantastic time. That is the goal. 325 00:17:23.799 --> 00:17:26.359 There is no showboating. There's no stick with me on 326 00:17:26.440 --> 00:17:28.519 this day, stick with me on that day. It's like, no, 327 00:17:29.319 --> 00:17:32.240 we can go anywhere throughout the schedule and we know 328 00:17:32.319 --> 00:17:34.599 we're going to have a great time because we're all 329 00:17:34.599 --> 00:17:37.240 making the same pizza recipe and we're all friends under 330 00:17:37.279 --> 00:17:40.039 the Transformation Station umbrella, and don't been like yay, we're 331 00:17:40.039 --> 00:17:43.319 all friends, dohdory. Life is good. Lee la la la 332 00:17:43.359 --> 00:17:47.039 le la. There's sometimes whe're like, Okay, this happened, we 333 00:17:47.079 --> 00:17:49.079 got a snip this in the butt, let's talk about 334 00:17:49.119 --> 00:17:53.000 it all right, cool. There's different perspectives being shared. There's 335 00:17:53.000 --> 00:17:57.119 sometimes some of our staff, doesn't matter, ambassador's coaches, front desk, whatever. 336 00:17:57.160 --> 00:17:59.759 Sometimes they'll come up to me and they'll bring something 337 00:17:59.759 --> 00:18:02.279 to my attention that they think needs to change, and 338 00:18:02.319 --> 00:18:05.160 I'll be like, okay, explain that to me, and they'll 339 00:18:05.160 --> 00:18:08.319 tell me. I'm like Nope, absolutely not. I'm like, oh, 340 00:18:08.480 --> 00:18:09.960 I'm like, let me explain to you why. And I 341 00:18:09.960 --> 00:18:11.400 will explain to them why. I like, oh, okay, I 342 00:18:11.440 --> 00:18:14.839 didn't understand that perspective. Or oh, actually, before your time here, 343 00:18:14.920 --> 00:18:18.920 we did try that didn't work. But sometimes I'm like, hey, 344 00:18:18.960 --> 00:18:21.880 you know what, we tried that before your time here. 345 00:18:22.279 --> 00:18:24.920 Times have changed. Let me put that in the brain bank. 346 00:18:25.000 --> 00:18:27.200 Let's see if I can implement that as a pop up, 347 00:18:27.279 --> 00:18:29.160 or see if there's let me just talk about it. 348 00:18:29.200 --> 00:18:32.480 Because I'm a talker. Let's see what kind of conversation 349 00:18:33.039 --> 00:18:36.519 I can bring from this. If the general conversation is 350 00:18:36.599 --> 00:18:39.880 ninety five percent of like, no, try again, then we're 351 00:18:39.880 --> 00:18:42.240 not going to try it. If ninety five percent of 352 00:18:42.240 --> 00:18:44.119 the conversation is, oh, yeah, you know what, that's a 353 00:18:44.119 --> 00:18:46.359 pretty good idea. Okay, We're we're going to try that. 354 00:18:47.359 --> 00:18:49.759 And there's sometimes like hey, I never thought about that, perspective, 355 00:18:49.799 --> 00:18:53.960 Thank you kindly, because I'm only as good as the 356 00:18:54.000 --> 00:18:55.920 members that we have in it, and I'm only as 357 00:18:55.960 --> 00:18:59.440 good as my teammates that are also coming alongside me 358 00:18:59.799 --> 00:19:02.920 for the bigger vision. It cannot be a one person show. 359 00:19:03.440 --> 00:19:06.480 So when I have different friendships that develop, it's hard. 360 00:19:06.920 --> 00:19:10.119 Like I've had coaches that no longer coach for me anymore, 361 00:19:10.519 --> 00:19:13.759 and we're still cheering for each other because that is 362 00:19:13.799 --> 00:19:16.440 the type of relationship that I like to build. I 363 00:19:16.519 --> 00:19:18.000 like to be like, oh, you know what, I'm not 364 00:19:18.039 --> 00:19:19.880 going to say you were a horrible coach. Okay, there 365 00:19:19.920 --> 00:19:22.319 was a couple coaches that made people cry, and I 366 00:19:22.359 --> 00:19:25.200 would still say that's not a proper fit under our umbrella. 367 00:19:25.880 --> 00:19:30.400 Definitely freaking not. You take that attitude into another space 368 00:19:30.680 --> 00:19:33.400 where that's going to be celebrated because you're probably going 369 00:19:33.480 --> 00:19:36.880 to be a fantastic coach over there. But under this umbrella, 370 00:19:37.079 --> 00:19:40.839 this year does not fly. Try again, love you by. 371 00:19:42.680 --> 00:19:44.799 Like there's when I had one coach and it was 372 00:19:44.880 --> 00:19:48.200 just not great and it was just for a hot 373 00:19:48.240 --> 00:19:53.160 second and she made people cry and she wasn't very nice. 374 00:19:53.279 --> 00:19:55.079 She was trying to be nice, but she didn't really 375 00:19:55.119 --> 00:19:59.720 know how to be nice. I guess in she was 376 00:19:59.759 --> 00:20:04.279 tre people that she didn't have the experience training the 377 00:20:04.319 --> 00:20:06.559 way that I wanted it to be. So she came 378 00:20:06.599 --> 00:20:09.400 in and she had her own agenda of how she 379 00:20:09.519 --> 00:20:13.119 wanted people to move in her classes. And there was 380 00:20:13.160 --> 00:20:15.880 so many people that like left crying. They would call me, 381 00:20:16.200 --> 00:20:19.079 they walked out of the class. It was like I 382 00:20:19.160 --> 00:20:21.440 wasn't there because when I was there, when she was 383 00:20:21.440 --> 00:20:24.440 teaching classes, it seemed like it was okay. But when 384 00:20:24.440 --> 00:20:27.640 I was gone, it was really, really, really super not okay. 385 00:20:28.759 --> 00:20:30.559 And when she came in and I talked with her 386 00:20:30.599 --> 00:20:32.960 a few times to try to fix this, and it 387 00:20:33.079 --> 00:20:35.519 just it wasn't registering to her. I'm not going to 388 00:20:35.559 --> 00:20:37.559 say she was trying to be malicious, because she very 389 00:20:37.640 --> 00:20:41.400 much so wasn't. And she actually asked me for a 390 00:20:41.440 --> 00:20:43.799 thing for her. She ended up going back to school 391 00:20:43.839 --> 00:20:46.519 for some fitness stuff and she asked me to check 392 00:20:46.559 --> 00:20:49.119 over some of her work and I'm like, yeah, no problem, 393 00:20:49.200 --> 00:20:51.319 And she asked me for an interview as like a 394 00:20:51.359 --> 00:20:53.079 gym owner. I'm like, yeah, girl, I got your back, 395 00:20:53.119 --> 00:20:55.000 don't worry about it. It just wasn't a good fit 396 00:20:55.039 --> 00:20:57.880 for the transformation station. But I remember sitting down with her, 397 00:20:58.720 --> 00:21:01.079 and there's sometimes I think I say things and I 398 00:21:01.160 --> 00:21:04.279 try to be kind and I'm growing now and thinking 399 00:21:04.319 --> 00:21:06.480 about what comes out of my mouth. Sometimes not when 400 00:21:06.519 --> 00:21:09.440 i'm teaching classes, because that just ends up being really funny, 401 00:21:10.559 --> 00:21:13.119