WEBVTT

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<v Speaker 1>I'm tired of your excuses. Unless you can tell me

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<v Speaker 1>where you're gonna come up with the twenty thousand dollars

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<v Speaker 1>in less than about five seconds, I'm dropping you off

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<v Speaker 1>of this ledge one, two, three four. It was nice

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<v Speaker 1>knowing you, But what huh you think me? A mafia overlord,

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<v Speaker 1>vampire vampire mafia overlord gives three flying figs about turning you? You?

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<v Speaker 1>You who came to me for one thousand dollars loan

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<v Speaker 1>for your little business and have been unable to pay

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<v Speaker 1>me to the two twenty thousand dollars. Watch who you're

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<v Speaker 1>calling a loan shark there, buddy, I'm not the one

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<v Speaker 1>ding over the edge of a balcony. You haven't been

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<v Speaker 1>able to pay me back on the most simplest of terms.

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<v Speaker 1>In fact, you know what here, Give me a thousand

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<v Speaker 1>dollars out of your pocket and I won't be flinging

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<v Speaker 1>you over there. We won't be dangling much longer. See,

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<v Speaker 1>you can't even do that. Why would I want to

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<v Speaker 1>turn you? I tell you what the days you're lucky day,

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<v Speaker 1>I've been in need of a little comedy. Tell me

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<v Speaker 1>why I am a part time cartoon month should allow

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<v Speaker 1>you the opportunity to become a vampire and serve me

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<v Speaker 1>for eternity when I can't even stand you for ten minutes. Okay, really,

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<v Speaker 1>you think you're the long lost love of my life? Well,

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<v Speaker 1>it is true. I've told you on many occasions that

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<v Speaker 1>I find you to be very cute. Now that's true.

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<v Speaker 1>I've told you that I do find you to be

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<v Speaker 1>very funny, which is the reason why I've allowed this

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<v Speaker 1>little charade to go on long enough. But the sad

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<v Speaker 1>truth is, if I allow you to live, then there's

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<v Speaker 1>gonna be a lot of people wondering, have I Zeena

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<v Speaker 1>Alexander gone saw? And I can't have that. But then again,

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<v Speaker 1>if I turned you, I could say that you're my

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<v Speaker 1>minion and that I want to keep you forever. Making

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<v Speaker 1>you a splat on the sidewalk was just such a

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<v Speaker 1>waste of potential. And none of my enemies want to

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<v Speaker 1>be turned. And quite frankly, I mean I did. You're right,

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<v Speaker 1>I did do that to your girlfriend. Yeah, your family too,

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<v Speaker 1>will listen, they shouldn't have sitten there called me a

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<v Speaker 1>blood sucking leech.

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<v Speaker 2>Letch.

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<v Speaker 1>They called me a blood suck. I mean I kind

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<v Speaker 1>of am aleeged, and I do suck blood. Oh, I

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<v Speaker 1>guess that was pretty cool that I did that to

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<v Speaker 1>them after all. Then well, listen here, this is back

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<v Speaker 1>when I was actually considering dating you before I gave

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<v Speaker 1>you the loan. See, had you never asked me to

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<v Speaker 1>operate within that capacity, then this whole I'm telling you, mixing, mixing,

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<v Speaker 1>mixing money with potential relationships always goes left and well, honestly,

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<v Speaker 1>if I can't have you, no one should. So pardon

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<v Speaker 1>what do you mean nobody would want you? You're just

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<v Speaker 1>saying that because you're scared of what would happen if

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<v Speaker 1>I thought someone did. I'm not scared. I mean they

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<v Speaker 1>just would cease to exist moments after I showed up.

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<v Speaker 2>Hm.

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<v Speaker 1>What, that's not what happened to your neighbor, not at all.

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<v Speaker 1>I didn't kill her. Well, no, my henchmen didn't kill her.

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<v Speaker 1>Starvation did. When we dropped her into a pit underground

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<v Speaker 1>and we sealed it and we played Barney is a

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<v Speaker 1>dinosaur from our imagination For about a week, there were

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<v Speaker 1>bottles of water down there. You know, I'm not completely

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<v Speaker 1>cruel hungers. Hunger is one thing, but thirst thirst is another.

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<v Speaker 1>Everyone should have nice, clean, cold water. Mm hmm, well, no,

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<v Speaker 1>I did do that to your former crush. But as

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<v Speaker 1>I said, everyone should have nice clean, cold, nice clean water.

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<v Speaker 1>She had nice clean water and she was submerged in it.

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<v Speaker 1>She had the option she could have drank more. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>just saying hydration is important. What are you trying to

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<v Speaker 1>get at Listen, I understand you can't pay me back,

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<v Speaker 1>and fine, you know what, No, you're right. I am

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<v Speaker 1>not only going to turn you, but I'm going to

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<v Speaker 1>turn you into one of the best vampires out there.

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<v Speaker 1>You have such a brilliant mind, but no one has

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<v Speaker 1>refined it, which is why you've been unable to make

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<v Speaker 1>this business of yours come off the ground. But if

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<v Speaker 1>I that's what I do. This is a coup. This

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<v Speaker 1>is officially a coup, which makes it to where I

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<v Speaker 1>look like the badass mafia queen that I am, and

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<v Speaker 1>I get the man that I've always wanted, and I

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<v Speaker 1>don't have to kill you. Oh a genius. See, I

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<v Speaker 1>turn you. Therefore you're my underling. Therefore I own everything

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<v Speaker 1>that you own and part of the mafia. Your business

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<v Speaker 1>then falls underneath my control. I take it from you.

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<v Speaker 1>Then I have one of the most valued tech companies

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<v Speaker 1>out there. Only I can turn it around, because well,

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<v Speaker 1>you're really good at making things that are useful. I'm

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<v Speaker 1>really good at commoditizing them and manufacturing and marketing and

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<v Speaker 1>all the other things that you are plumb abismo. Ad

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<v Speaker 1>look at it this way, you'll have more time for activities,

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<v Speaker 1>not group activities. Jesus listen here. Okay, pardon, well, well,

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<v Speaker 1>I mean, yes, that could work. But again, I don't

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<v Speaker 1>think you should go out on your own trying to

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<v Speaker 1>figure out how to be a how to make all

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<v Speaker 1>that work for yourself. Just let me take over the business.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh no, trust me or not. You haven't been turned yet,

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<v Speaker 1>but you're not gonna have much of a toice. Now,

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<v Speaker 1>come on, we have to start the process. Well, it's

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<v Speaker 1>my nail. I cut you bite, Go ahead, lap it up.

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<v Speaker 1>The blood it gets into your system makes it tour.

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<v Speaker 1>Once I bite into you, then even if I take

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<v Speaker 1>a little bit too much, because you speel rather good,

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<v Speaker 1>it won't be it won't actually be anything that's gonna

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<v Speaker 1>harm you and kill you. There you go, Ah, that

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<v Speaker 1>feels great. No that it's fine. You can take a

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<v Speaker 1>little bit more take okay, no, no, no, no, no, don't

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<v Speaker 1>get greedy. Now bring that lovely delicious arm over here.

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<v Speaker 1>Oh come on, that's just cliche. I could absolutely bite

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<v Speaker 1>your neck, but I don'd rather look into your eyes

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<v Speaker 1>while I do this part.

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<v Speaker 2>Now, looker for that.

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<v Speaker 1>Sorry I should. I always end up tat and take

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<v Speaker 1>a little bit too much that you should be fine though,

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<v Speaker 1>Oh yeah, the woozy Oh no, no, no, usually I

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<v Speaker 1>have checked. Usually when I turn people, it's not so

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<v Speaker 1>impromptu and you lay down here. Hey, come come, take

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<v Speaker 1>him to one of the guest rooms. Yes, he's freshly turned,

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<v Speaker 1>so we're gonna need some you know what. This is

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<v Speaker 1>a special occasion. Let's get some. Be positive. Yes, it

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<v Speaker 1>helps you with the mood. It's the moon answer. Come on,

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<v Speaker 1>it's blood type. People live your life like your blood type.

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<v Speaker 1>Be positive. Yeah, they're gonna give you everything that you need,

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<v Speaker 1>take care of you while you go through this transformation process.

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<v Speaker 1>It's a little creaky. We'll go with that. It's a

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<v Speaker 1>little and well, you will start your training and what

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<v Speaker 1>it means to be a vampire and turn you into

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<v Speaker 1>the world's best vampire. Well, no, that's not exactly what

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<v Speaker 1>is gonna happen. You don't instantly become one of my

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<v Speaker 1>coppos or anything like that. No, you also start at

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<v Speaker 1>the bottom rung of the mafia too. Lord, you have

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<v Speaker 1>so much to learn such such a little paladin, aren't you? Paladin?

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<v Speaker 1>Dandy about the Do you think I don't know what

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<v Speaker 1>a twenty sided dice is? Jesus, all right, you go

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<v Speaker 1>ahead and take that nap. I am gonna be busy

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<v Speaker 1>going through your phone and ensuring any little chickadees that

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<v Speaker 1>still know who you are also forget who you are.

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<v Speaker 1>All the world forgets about them. All right, bye, darling,

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<v Speaker 1>see you in a couple of days. Hey, guys, Zeena

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<v Speaker 1>Alexander here. Okay, so this is the last day that

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<v Speaker 1>if you are messaging me on discord, I probably do

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<v Speaker 1>not hear I've heard from you. Inspiration for this audio

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<v Speaker 1>this goes back to me a few years ago when

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<v Speaker 1>I don't think any of you guys would have liked me.

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<v Speaker 1>I legitimately, I had a couple of exts that cheated

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<v Speaker 1>on me. It caused me to like really want to

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<v Speaker 1>go through phones and all that good stuff. And nobody

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<v Speaker 1>got harmed or anything, but I really went back to

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<v Speaker 1>that mindset of like wanting to remove anybody who was

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<v Speaker 1>against our relationship out of my partner's lives. So that's

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<v Speaker 1>kind of the inspiration that I drew upon. But also

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<v Speaker 1>when I saw the artwork that I created, like this

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<v Speaker 1>girl who's like menacing holding someone up, I instantly thought mafia.

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<v Speaker 1>And several of you guys in our community posts also

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<v Speaker 1>saw that too. And then on top of that, I

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<v Speaker 1>haven't done a vampire audio in a while, so I

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<v Speaker 1>thought it was like Vampire Mafia. Not gonna lie. My friend,

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<v Speaker 1>best friend dream Audio v out dream Audio va here

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<v Speaker 1>on YouTube did a Vampire Princess series and you know what,

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<v Speaker 1>dream Dream took a couple of my stories and built

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<v Speaker 1>off of them. So I was like, you know what

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<v Speaker 1>this is? This would be fun. We have that kind

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<v Speaker 1>of back and forth. She's fine with it, I'm fine

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<v Speaker 1>with it. So anyways, some community shout outs, I want

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<v Speaker 1>to say thank you guys. It is baffling to me

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<v Speaker 1>that we have gotten so many people onto our Discord server.

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<v Speaker 1>It just keeps growing and growing and growing and growing.

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<v Speaker 1>So I want to say hello to Steiner insert name

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<v Speaker 1>here has been very very has been very very active

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<v Speaker 1>space Solitaire John this slime is actually a writer on

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<v Speaker 1>the server now and does some NSFW stuff that I'm

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<v Speaker 1>super excited with, and Biggles and then Ory, I love

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<v Speaker 1>your face. I know you haven't had as much time

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<v Speaker 1>to be on the server, but you are still equally

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<v Speaker 1>as loved. I am coming back home tonight, guys. I

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<v Speaker 1>might just pass out though, not gonna lie, but I

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<v Speaker 1>will be around for Thursday, Friday, Saturday. We will definitely

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<v Speaker 1>be on the server, playing some video games, chit chatting,

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<v Speaker 1>and having some fun again. Our server is linked in

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<v Speaker 1>the description down below. If you guys would like to

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<v Speaker 1>get with that anyways, I love you. It's free for

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<v Speaker 1>everyone to join if you want to. Anyways, I love you,

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<v Speaker 1>guys more than make announcing in the next one.

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<v Speaker 2>Bye.