Speaker 1: When your old career gives you lemons throwing some ice,
mixing some vodka. It's call it a podcast from the
Mac of All Trade Studio in Fairport and driven by
Victor Chrysler Dots Gee Ram, It's Billified, the Bill Moran Podcast.
Speaker 2: Well, hello and welcome. Thanks for getting your pot on.
Thank you for telling a friend. That's how we spread
the word about the pirate ship. My friends, that opening
statement is a little more true for some people today. Right.
I see you, I see you, I got your messages.
I know what's happening. I wanted to. This is a
little different episode because I had something I wanted to
to talk about, and a friend of mine will be
joining me a little bit later. But there's all kinds
of shit that just just I blew up. And of
course I can't say a whole lot of what I
knew and when I knew it. But just to my
my friend p y T, I've been deleting messages. I
just want you to know. Always tell me I have
too many messages on my phone. I haven't answered all
of them, but I see you out there. Look, there
has been a change in the local radio landscape. Brother
Weez was supposed to wait, I guess till noon today
or something. I can't sit on the information like this
that it's going to be his last show in ninety
five one, and the frequency that he's on, what people
have been I know you're I know you want to
hear what I have to say about it. I know
you do, and I and I know in particular what
you want me to say. And I'm gonna surprise you
because I'm not going to say what you want me
to say. I will say this. Brother We's was an
iconic talent, and when I happened to be part of
his show, which was in the early two thousands, it
was some of the most fun times in radio I
ever had. I laughed harder. I worked really hard, but
I laughed harder, and we did some real cool stuff.
And I will always value that time. And I think
he is a very warm and genuine person, and I
think he has been a part of people's lives for
a long time. And so to know that it was
his last show today, I think for a lot of people,
and myself included, you know rough, Okay, so what does
that mean? And there are other changes to the station.
You got to remember that everything is a business, right,
So if the business was working, the change wouldn't happened.
A business's only job is to make money. If you're
not making money, then you got to make a change.
And so things stick around because they're viable, right, they
make money. So if people are no longer in certain positions,
and look, we us a side. I mean it's been
forty something years. I don't think he needs to work.
I think it was a love of doing this. But
I that I know nothing about, so I please don't
twist this in any way, but I would say that
you know, if you're if you're hearing other people and
changes and stuff, if it were working, they'd be there.
It wasn't they're not making money. It didn't work. It
didn't work, okay, So that that's why there's a change.
It's at its core, it's business. Business has no feelings.
I say that all the time. You and I think
feelings are very important because, right you hear a song,
it brings you back to a certain time in your life.
A memory is something like that, right, So there's a
feeling associated with that. And I think that that's why
a lot of times we get attached and we think
this is. Yeah, it feels shitty, but it's a change
made by the people who make money on the other
side of that. I don't like this for radio. I
don't I think radio. I'm in the podcast world now
and I'm about to tell you something else, something else
that has that I think will surprise a lot of people,
but shouldn't. The text won't stop coming. I'm telling you
just now. I believe that radio is still a very
viable medium if you did it at the local level.
And I think that the only way to make it
a viable medium at a local level is with spoken word,
because it's a place for people to come together, share
ideas is and have a discussion from the privacy sort
of their of their car. They're alone, right, You know,
there's different things in radio where you would see, you know,
if you work in an office, right and they have
the radio on, it might be playing a soft rock
station because it's a little more palpable for everybody around.
But when you get in your car, you get to
choose your right, and that's discretionary listening. And you would see,
like in the summertime, discretionary listening is op right because
people have more free time, and they're outside and they're
on their own, and that's when discretionary listening is up,
and so that's actually a good time to see, you know.
Do people choose to listen to you? You know, And
that's why you'll hear some stations say they're the artwork
station whatever. But I don't like this. I think local talent,
local voices, people who drive the streets you drive, are
very important to have on the radio. And I believe
there's that will continue to some extent. And I will
say that I was part of the problem. When I
was in radio. I was on eighty fucking rock stations
around the country talking to des Moines, Iowa. I've never
been well. I was once, but you know what I mean?
Or or has anybody been to Brian, Texas? I haven't
parts of Florida. I know, Alaska, I haven't been there.
I was on the radio there right in. What they
would do is they would send you liners so you
could talk about you would have like a local break
for them, and they would run it in between songs
and it was called liner or whatever, and it would
just shoot it into the system. It's great. It's a
way for a corporation to save money. It is, and
it's kind of cool to be asked to be part
of that, right there's only a handful of people that
they asked to do it, but it's still part of
the problem. And that's where I don't like days like today.
I don't like when I see this change in radio
because you know, to go back to music or whatever.
A lot of people are just getting that now from
different and so the real thing, the one difference you
can have is your voice or the voice of the
of the community, the voice of the people. And that
sort of brings me to something else, you know. I
learned early on when I was in radio one, I
got bored very quickly playing music. I did, uh. So
that's why when I was like doing overnights, I just
open up the phones and let people talk to me.
And I learned early that the one thing people are
striving for and looking for in this world is a
connection people. Every one of us, not people, every one
of us, me, you, your best friend, your mom, your dad,
your kid. Everybody wants to know they matter, they matter.
They also want to know that they're heard and they
have an opinion and they want to be heard. And
sometimes I think this device because we can be on
it on social media, we can find our tribe, and
our opinions now become our belief and we don't accept
other things. Where I think with radio was it drew
from a bigger pot and you could have different discussions
with people you know and don't forget too like tone
gets lost. You read a text in the tone of
the mood you're in. So someone could write you a
message and they could be very happy or meaning, having
no malice behind it. But the way you read the
message is you understand you're applying your emotions to it.
So I always thought that that was the greatest thing
about radio, is that you could have people come together
and have a discussion and be heard. And I love
I'm so curious about people when I say things like
I was never really into strip clubs, and people go, yeah, right,
I did gigs at strip clubs, Yes I did, Yes,
I did, But I didn't care to see the girls.
I was more fatascinated sitting at the bar talking to
the strippers or the other patrons. What is it about
this place that brings you here? What do you think
you're going to get by seeing someone who you'll never
probably have next to you in bed, get naked. It
just didn't make any sense to me. However, I was
curious as to why it made sense to you. And
that has been the biggest thing for me is the
absolute curiosity of human beings. Curiosity of everybody's existence is different.
And I will say this, I think a lot of
times we cover up pain in things. I listened to
a podcast today and I wish I had actually taken
some notes and I'll bring it up when my friend
comes in this podcast. But it was the guy basically
said he worked with troubled youth and a lot of
kids who were in gangs, and he was like, what's
the one thing I could say to them? And he said,
you have an inner genius. Yes, every one of us
has an ener genius and a calling and a creativity.
It's there. Maybe you're not listening to it, maybe you're
not tuned into it. Maybe it's buried under all kinds
of pain and things like that. So because of radio
and discovering that this curiosity of people and loving to
be able to talk to people and share ideas and
form opinions and hear what other people have to say,
and I learned a lot from listeners on the radio.
I really truly did, and I've learned a lot from
people interacting with this podcast that we've been doing for
the past two years. I had an opportunity that came
out of the oblivion. I don't know that anything ever
comes out of the blue, but sort of out of
the oblivion to go back and get my masters in
mental health counseling. There's a program that has started right
now that New York State pays for the entire thing
if you graduate by the spring of twenty twenty seven,
and it's at Saint John Fisher University, which is my
alma mater, and I have decided to do that. So
I'm going back for a master's in mental health counseling.
And I think for some people you go, well that
that's like a forty five degree ninety degree angle on
what you're doing in life. It's really not or a
one to eighty. It's not the curiosity of people bringing
people together, talking, helping people be heard and understood and
and bring that Those were always the things that that
meant a lot to me. So when I hear about
local radio sort of losing a little bit of that,
I don't like it. I don't. I don't like it
in any way. There's no You're not going to see
me cheering or a plotting today in any way. I
think that part sucks. But because of my curiosity and
this opportunity, I am going back. I started just the
other day and I'll go to classes again tonight. It
is not going to be easy. It's a challenge. I
like to think that we should all continue to learn
and challenge ourselves and if there's something out there for you,
fucking grab it with both hands and go. Who knows
where this will take me? Who knows what could happen
from it? I don't know. We're not gonna stop doing
the podcast. That'll continue, so you know that that will
There'll be there'll be episodes every day. Bill Lightenman will
start picking up and it's gonna be It's gonna be
a lot for me. But okay, I kind of like that.
That's when I'm at my vest, you know what I mean.
I think this is this could be pretty awesome. But
going back to school, I'll tell you what, it's a
little bit overwhelming, right, It's a little bit overwhelming. I'm
fifty four years old, as my friend Pyit reminded me
you're fifty four. Yes I am, but not in a
negative way. I think it was just one of these hey,
just you know, make sure you're making a right decision.
And I it just it just happened so quickly, and
and you know, I've talked a lot and it's still
kind of fresh.
Speaker 3: Right.
Speaker 2: My dad died a little over a month ago. My
dad is a Saint John Fisher and Lump. And I'll
wrap up this part of the podcast with this story.
So my dad, I'm gonna just tell it because I
don't know if he were alive, if I would, because
he would listen, and I don't, And I never wanted
to offend him. I found this story to be heartwarming
and delightful. I'm not so sure that he would. I
really don't. So here is the thing. My dad was
apparently in the seminary to studying to be a priest,
and I think unceremoniously got kicked out. Allegedly he had
put a lit cigarette in a statue of the Virgin
Mary's hands. His story, not mine, brought somebody named Peaches
to Parents' knight whatever. They kind of go, okay, this
isn't for you, But he said he learned to right
really well there and the man was also a bit
of a genius, and from there he was encouraged to
apply to college. Now when he's doing this, it's like
mid August, late August of I don't even know, nineteen
sixty something, and all the colleges he applied to were
accepting him, but they were accepting him to start in
the second semester, not the first semester. And one of
the priests my dad was working at a bank, goes,
if you don't leave Brooklyn now, you're never going to
leave because you'll meet a girl, You'll wind up staying,
You'll fall in love, There'll be something here that's going
to hold you. If you go right now, your life's
going to be very different. The only place that accepted
my dad for the fall admission was Saint John Fisher
in Rochester, New York, place my dad had never been.
He got on a plane, packed a suitcase, flew up
here and started attending Fisher and never looked back. His parents,
my grandparents, drove his things up to him a couple
weeks later. Imagine that now he was a little bit older.
I think he was twenty twenty one when he did this,
but still you're young, right, sight unseen, Like just got
on the plane and went all right, let's go. So
I'm talking to my brother, and my brother I said
to him, I'm gonna go do this thing. And he
said to me, yeah, I think it's great. I think
it's awesome that you're gonna get a master's or work
toward a master's. And who knows, right, maybe I won't
do it, maybe I won't be able to hack it.
And he said, it's kind of funny. It happened sort
of the same way as it did with Dad at Fisher.
Now I did go to Fisher for undergrad, but just
like that last minute, a spot opens up. It's completely
taken care of by the state. If you do all
the required stuff, you can get in there and boom.
Kind of the same way. So in a way, maybe
it's the hand of my dad pushing it. I don't know,
but it's not that far off the beaten path of
what I've done here with the podcast and talking to people,
and certainly will help things like The Lightenment, which is
another podcast. And then you have just the idea of
radio and bringing people together. It's amazing to me how
sort of synchronistic, synchronistic let me try that again. How
syncratic all of this is. I don't even know if
that's the word, but how all this has come together.
So in the next segment, my friend rob Rice, who
is the head of the mental health department at Saint
John Fisher University, will be joining us to talk a
little bit more about that some of the opportunities, and
we may talk about some things like the calling right,
the calling that people have your energenius, your soul right.
It's there and it's there for everybody. So thank you
for letting me share a little bit of my life
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Speaker 4: Recorder in a fountain means that people still have dreams
and it's soaking in a parking means that people come thing.
Come on now, bo, don't be fae to start to
sweed on your stands better than recred on your heart.
Speaker 5: There's a powerful line right there, right literally a little
sweat and yeah, face no better time from Dylan.
Speaker 2: Gossip is the name of the artist, right, Is that
my saying that? Right? You got it? Yeah? Uh? Doctor
Rob Rice from Saint John Fisher University, I'm just getting
the inframe a little bit better. There we go. So
I I did the first part of the podcast solo.
I have somebody who keeps telling me I need to
do some solo podcasts once in a while, and I'm
I'm reticent to do that. I don't know, because I go,
who just wants to hear your babble?
Speaker 3: But I think it's a good idea. Yeah, I h
I think you can do that.
Speaker 2: Yeah. So uh And I don't see. That's the thing
is I got. I very rarely listen to podcasts, and
I did listen to one today where there was somebody
like way off Mike asking guy a question and the
name of the pot I forget the name of the
guy who was doing it, but it was really about
soul and inner calling and that sort of thing. And
so this person and I wish I had taken some notes,
and I meant to do that, and I got caught
up with things today. But he was talking about when
he went and so what this guy was saying was
that when he started to he realized he was a storyteller,
and as a storyteller, he had something happen to him
as a child where he was in New York city
and there was gangs in the school and some one
of his friends took something from these gangs, and these
guys cornered him in the bathroom, had them on the
floor and had had knives out, and he goes, I
really think, like my ego kind of left my body
and when I don't want to watch this bloody mess.
And he said, I told him I talked to them,
and he said it was like they it just made
everything go away, and he goes, that's when I realized
I was more of a storyteller. And then he went
on to work with gangs later on, and he said,
what's the one thing that I could say to make
an impact to any young person who it would be
at risk right and at risk youth. And what he
said was, you have a genius inside of you. You
have the genius, a genius, soul a calling and they're
calling and he goes and everybody would go, yeah, I
do I have these ideas. I have this thing. And
I often have thought that so many times people are
not feel like they're not heard or they have a
great idea, but they've been somehow through trauma. And that's
what this guy was saying, Like I get. He goes,
I tell the you know, the young people. I tell
the young people in gangs, the at risk youth this
and they all go, yeah, yeah, yeah. He goes. I
go out and I speak somewhere and he goes, and
I get a pissed off sixty five year old the
audience going, I don't about my calling? What's my inner calling?
I haven't And he said, you know, there's something in
you that is just driving that will always come out,
but it might be buried beneath trauma. It might be
buried beneath rubble. This had me thinking a whole bunch
of things. But I've already said that I am going
back to Saint John Fisher University to get my master's
degree in mental health counseling. And I will tell you that.
Like it's a little intimidating because I don't think I
know the what is it? The A D, what's the
role APA? The APA? Way to write? Like, I don't
know how to do that.
Speaker 3: So I mentioned that that was the one thing that
he thought you might be working.
Speaker 2: See that, because I think my face when I.
Speaker 6: Asked him how the night when he said, great, Bill
was really enthusiastic.
Speaker 3: He said, I think he's nervous about APA.
Speaker 2: Well, APA only because it's academic writing, and so that
would be a little more than right the casual things
or the more I think, I I currently right as
I speak, and you know that way it's a little
more relatable. But I think there's ways you have to
learn it.
Speaker 6: Yeah, it's called Purdue Owl. You go to the Purdue
Owl and they give you the guidelines. It's really straightforward.
And then you know, between you and I, AI helps.
Speaker 3: A lot too.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Well I figured that I wasn't going to.
Speaker 3: Say anything you and I.
Speaker 2: To this, but it was it was all this. So
I also said, and and this was a weird thing
that this came about very very quickly. Uh. And I
say that things don't come out of the blue. I
think they come out of the oblivion, like you're sort
of oblivious to this, and what do you do? And
the more I thought about it, and especially after hearing
this podcast that I took a three mile walk this
morning and listened to it, and I I started to think, Wow,
you know, over the years on radio I talked about
being molested, right, and I don't know that I've ever
really dealt with it. But I just thought talking about
it would be good, and it came up. And this
is a weird day, right because locally radio Hall of
Famer Brother Weez announced that he is this is going
to be his last show on Radio ninety five to one,
where he's working now, but he was out at the
time living with cancer. So I'm producing his show. So
I'm in there and at the time, I remember there
was a comic in there and Tommy's given John Detulio
a bunch of shit because he won't go out. And
John's like, unless it's family, we don't allow anybody but
family to sit with the kids, okay, And so I
said something to the effect of you know, because John's like, yeah,
it was only family, and I went, well, even people
who are really close to you, bad things can happen.
And I said, we had somebody who was really close
to our family and I go in the babysitter molested
me and I just blurted it out. That was the
first time on the radio, and I think that, like
the room, it was like a needle going across a record.
And then I continue to talk about it over the years,
and even when and did something where I was on
a panel at Pavona talking about the different things that
Pavona does. And I look over and there's somebody who
I went to college with on the panel, and I
had no idea, and I don't think she didn't have
any idea. And these were things that you just didn't
really talk about. And the more I talked about it,
so I kind of thought, while I'm dealing with it.
But here's my point with this. I can't tell you
the number of letters and emails that I would receive
from men who would say to me, thank you so
much for saying that happened to you and showing that
you can kind of continue on. And one guy wrote
me how he was going to kill himself and he
was so upset and it was really this, that and
the other thing, and you know, no one believed them,
and it was just amazing, and I thought, wow, so
all this stuff seems to just line up, like the
mental health counseling, And I'm like, yeah, and I go,
even if you at some point were uh, just able
to help somebody in that situation, really deal with that,
because it does it does screw you up.
Speaker 6: And I've wondered if that might be one of the
directions that you go. I've been since you know, this
has all come about so quickly. We've Yeah, was three
days ago that the decided. Yeah, and uh for us too.
It was a unique situation. Like you said, there's a
lot of synchronicity. We had uh, full class, we had,
the program was full. We had one student withdraw. We
had a weight list, but the wait list evaporated because
started ye and so we kind of miraculously had this
space available.
Speaker 4: Uh.
Speaker 6: You know there's the program through FLIPS, the CPT program
that you know, helping with with students just coming in
this year. Uh, and so we were able to get
you interviewed quick, get your application taken care of quick.
And I've been thinking NonStop about kind of what you're
gonna do with this. I can't wait to see. I'm
I'm you know, I have Fraser running through my mind.
I have I can imagine something with comedy and mental health.
There's so much research right now that looks.
Speaker 2: At Yeah, you sent me the article. Guess what I
haven't done. I haven't read it yet.
Speaker 3: I wouldn't expect you to.
Speaker 2: I did it. No, I do want to read it.
It's one of these things where like, you know, yesterday
was the first day of school for Jamison, and then
he was driving me nuts when he came home because
he wants this certain book bag and it's some kind
of special splash painting. Yeah, listen in my mind. And
then he's screaming in the store. He loves to do
this once in a while. And this is where I go,
there's like, no respect. But I've lost control, rob, I
have lost total control. He's screaming. This guy's here made
fourteen year old girl, and he thinks it's so funny.
And I'm like, I, you know.
Speaker 3: This might not help.
Speaker 6: I haven't met many psychologists kids who aren't a little
bit messed up.
Speaker 2: But he's so funny and stuff, and I there's a
part of me that goes, that's hilarious. I mean it's
so hilarious because it's it's so uncomfortable, right, you would
just never do it. You would say, that's one of
those things, you say, how funny would this be to do?
Could you imagine how they would react? And then nobody
does it. This idiot does it, and he's like.
Speaker 6: Me in that sense, Andy does it with you, which
is like it's kind of beautiful that he feels that
you have that relationship with him where he can do
that kind of thing.
Speaker 3: I think that there's something to that.
Speaker 2: Okay, all right, well I'm glad you said that because
I was like so annoyed yesterday. I was, and then
at one point he said to me, listen, I'm really sorry.
I feel like I'm getting under your skin a little bit.
And I said, well, I have a lot of things
on my mind and I'm trying to make everything, you know,
balance out here and that whatever, it is.
Speaker 3: A perfect process.
Speaker 6: You came over to my house for the fire Saturday night,
and my kids were I had a kid with friends
over jumping in the trampoline on top of pool floats.
Speaker 3: Yeah it was, but I loved it.
Speaker 2: I thought that was so cool.
Speaker 3: Well, yeah, it's nobody got hurt, right, cool?
Speaker 2: Right? It was like, That's what I didn't say to you.
I go, I would probably twist anicle doing that, but
that no big deal. But that I could totally see
as a kid. Now, see, I would have taken at
one step further if I could have as a kid, uh,
because we did have a trampoline, but we didn't have
the sides on it. When I was grown up.
Speaker 3: They don't think they even made it.
Speaker 2: It was just yeah, I don't know. So this was more.
I think I was already at at Fisher and my
parents got a trampoline from my brother and sister. And
when I would come home, I would jump off the
railing of the deck and it was a good not
ten feet but probably like somewhere between six and eight
feet away, and I would do a belly flop on
it and then flip over in the air. And if
I knew I could have put a pool raft on there,
I would have tried to pop it. And seets like
those are the things where I go. I was because
I do go to therapy and I've talked about that
and you know who I see, and I said to
her today, I go there are things like that where
people will go I would never do that. That would scare
the shit out of me, like you know, driving a
car real fast or doing exactly that, jumping off the
thing onto that doesn't scare me. But there's some interpersonal
things that man, I get like, I can't do it.
I just can't do it. Yeah, But I am excited
about this and I think it's going to be great.
Speaker 6: I think it's going to be fantastic. I'm excited to
work with you. As I said before, I've been my
mind's going down stop with kind of where you're going
to take this. I'm excited to have you in class
as I As I told you there's you're actually but
maybe the fourth oldest in this incoming class, so you're
not We've got several non traditional we call them students
right now, and I'd love to see it typically. You know,
it's so helpful to the other students in the class too.
And I've got a seventy twenty three year old emails
in these classes, and so when you have drop a
couple of non traditional students in there, it improves their
learning experience. I feel like everyone learns from each other.
I love teaching classes when I've got at least a
couple of non traditional.
Speaker 2: Really yeah, yeah, so far. I mean, look, it was
day one, right, so I'm still sort of getting my
sea legs about me. But I was worried about the
writing process. I hear something like a seven to ten
page paper and a twenty minute video thing, and I go, oh,
my god, kid, what am I? What am I doing?
And then I thought, well, I always believed, and I
think this. There are some other things here, but I
always believed you could eat a buick if I ground
up a little bit and put it on your cereal
every day, you know what I mean, And and not
that you want to.
Speaker 3: We probably do over a lifetime and some kind of plastic.
Speaker 2: I'm certain of it. I'm so certain of it. And
so I I just thought, Okay, you you've got to
You've got to do what you're not good at. Like
in college, I would wait till the last minute. I mean,
I remember, I'll never forget again. A little reference to WIZ.
I was up writing a paper for my philosophy class,
and I was up all night, and it was I
had a typewriter, but I had an electric typewriter. But
you know, it's before computer really, and that's how all
I am. And I'm listening to Wee's and that was
the day that Sam Kennison had died, and I thought, wow,
So that sort of made that connection with me. But
I was always last minute, and I'm finding that I
can't do that now and I really want this to work.
So I've got to get myself, you know. The proverbial
ducks in a row and I've been getting up at.
Speaker 3: Uh, yeah, you're not alone in that.
Speaker 2: No.
Speaker 3: Two things.
Speaker 6: I think one, you know, I think it's it feels
like there's meaning in the fact that we's retiring today
at the same time that we're talking about you going
back in. Yeah, weird, doesn't It seems like another piece
of sergy to me. And then in terms of the writing, Uh,
you're a good writer. I know you're a good writer.
Like the format is no problem. Format's a piece of cake.
You'll learn that.
Speaker 3: But you're a good writer.
Speaker 6: And the reason why I would love to really continue
thinking about, Okay, what are you going to do with
this when you're done, is because you can start to
you know, the way this goes the best is when
you have an idea what you want to do this
with this, what you want to specialize in, and you
can focus your papers and your writing on those things. Ah,
it's you know, it goes easier. It all ends up
being useful later on. Maybe someday when you get your PhD,
will be part of your dissertation.
Speaker 2: Right, how'd you know that that I've actually thought, I go, well,
maybe you follow this all the way through you're dead. Well,
he did you know what. I feel like I've always
been a little liar with that. He had like a
panic attack given his dissertation. I didn't realize he never finished. Yeah,
he never finished. Really yeah, so he was I think
abd d all. But dissertation that was pretty much the thing.
It was never really talked about. But here's the thing,
and I told this story earlier in this episode, but
my dad had been in the seminary politely asked to
leave for sticking the lit cigarette and Virgin Mary's statue. Yeah,
he did do that, according to him, Bob, I'm thinking
he probably did.
Speaker 3: And before he wrote his letter of resignation.
Speaker 2: From the church. Yes, yeah, yeah, he was in there.
So this is so. I think he had to be
maybe nineteen or twenty and one of the priests came
to him and said, you're so bright. You know you
need to go to college. But it's it's late summer.
And so he applied everywhere, and I think the University
of Chicago was really where he was looking at, and
he I know, he got in there for a PhD
program after Fisher, but everybody was taking him for the
January admissions because it was too late in the semester
the only and so this priest came to him said, Bill,
I know of a college. I think they'll take you. Now,
if you stay in Brooklyn, you're gonna it'll be a
girl fan. Something's gonna happen. So he pushed, and my
dad got accepted the Fisher and got on a plane
sight unseen, last minute went to Fisher. So I'm talk
different place then, yeah, yes, it was a much different place.
And I think at the time he had to live
in what was called the Hotel Manger downtown and they
bust you in because they didn't have enough dorms. They were. Yeah,
at that time, I think what happened it was all
male yep, and nas with was all female. And that's
where my mom went. So I'm talking to my brother
and my brother goes, I think this is awesome, dude,
and he goes, you know, my sister had told him
a little bit and he said, uh, and he reminded
me that he goes, he goes, I almost feel like
Dad had a hand in this. It's that last minute,
that last minute thing with Fisher, and I went, oh,
I didn't even think of that. Yeah, I mean, and again,
can you you know I always go, what's the meaning
of life? Whatever you apply to what I suppose would
be the meaning of life. But I don't want to like, look,
you know things, But it is weird how it all
has kind of come together like that and you go
all the energy, Yeah, a ton of it, a ton
of it. And to me that was the cool thing,
like with radio because somebody I think people would say, well,
you're you're doing a one to eighty or you're going
in a completely different path, and I'm going, no, you're
really not. You're really not.
Speaker 6: Absolutely well doing this. You mean going into mental health counseling. Yeah, yeah,
You've got so many transferable skills.
Speaker 2: But I'm like that that's the thing that I say.
It's like, you're not going in a different path and
you can continue to do this and bring about things
and who knows what happens.
Speaker 3: Absolutely you know, yeah, you've got the lightenment going.
Speaker 6: I can see these skills working its way into that
show in some way.
Speaker 2: Yep, I have.
Speaker 6: So I can't wait to continue to talk about that
offline someone.
Speaker 2: What is the uh? The thing was? And I I
have evoked to you a little bit on episodes where
I said, like and I've noticed this too, like you
don't watch TV, and it wasn't a challenge for me.
I got rid of like I was like, I'm paying
for all these channels. The only thing I wanted was ESPN,
and I'm paying for all this other crap that I
don't watch. And and I have got HBO Max and
Netflix and Prime and.
Speaker 3: For Hard Knocks. I did watch Hard Knock.
Speaker 2: Yes I have one episode. Uh so all these things right,
And I loved I was a huge fan of the
show Hacks on HBO Max.
Speaker 3: If you've ever seen it, heard of it at Comedians, Yeah, she's.
Speaker 2: She's it's a one. It's a really really great show.
But I just haven't watched anything. And you've written, you're
writing a book, you've written a book, you're the head
of the department, you've got private prep. I mean, it's like,
I go, how does this guy do it all? And
I also start to think, like when I was a kid,
someone would say, what does your dad do? My dad's
a teacher my kids, what does your dad do? He's
on the radio. Now it's like, what's your dad do?
We does this, this and this, And it's like, yeah,
that that that I think that's how we're meant to be.
I don't know.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I agree, and you know it. And it depends
on the person too, right in your temperament. And I
think that you know, there's ADHD and some of that
stuff works its way in there too. And I would
not be able to if I worked from nine to
five every day in an office job, I'd probably go
home and watch TV online. I don't think that i'd
be able to, you know, sit and write books and
make videos for my daughter and do all that kind
of stuff.
Speaker 3: Right.
Speaker 6: I know I'm able to do that because while I'm
always busy, I can always do what I want when
I want to do it, as long as I'm always
being busy and always being productive. Ye, And so there's
not I think that, you know, there's there's something too
having that variety and really the professional freedom. Right when
you feel like a professional, you know, then you behave
like one. It becomes a self fulfilling prophecy.
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, that's very true, right, I mean the whole
idea of dress for success you behave better, you look better. Yeah,
I mean all of that is uh I agree with,
but I find it impressive because you have your your
book cliff Notes.
Speaker 6: Like cliff Notes got the Video Games and Psychotherapy, which
is the first book, and that was a manual for
teaching mental health counselors and social workers and psychologists how
to work with young people in integrate video games and
those types of things. That's a sign for the child course,
which you'll take with me. So you'll you'll uh, I'll
give you a copy of that book. And then the
second book was cliff Notes that came out just this
past year. That was a much different writing experience.
Speaker 2: Great book.
Speaker 3: I'm getting good feedback on it.
Speaker 2: Great book you need to read. But you have a
website where people can go get these.
Speaker 3: Cliff cliff notesbook dot CA.
Speaker 6: Yeah, Video Games and Psychotherapy was published through rough Edge,
so you can get that anywhere. You can get cliff
Notes on Amazon too. But that was a more personal book.
It was a little bit hard to put it out
there because it was so personal. But I'm at a
point now where I'm comfortable enough with the content that
I'm comfortable talking about it more. And then right now
I'm just finishing up. I think the title is going
to be the name. It'll be Deep will be the
name of the book, and then the subtitle will be
Lessons from an Enlightened Doctor. Yeah, And so that book
is almost done. I'm going to print out copies of
it for you and the rest of the Wise Counsel,
and I'll get feedback from all of you. And once
I get your feedback and corrections, and I want you
to really go at it, this will be and it's
it's all an APA format.
Speaker 3: So by the end of reason oh really, yep, you're good.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 6: So once you're reading and get me back feedback, then
I'll make those changes and i'll try to get that
published too. If I can't get it, I can't get
a publisher, I'll publish myself.
Speaker 2: Can. I want to give you an opportunity. You don't
have to do it, but to brag about your your daughters.
And I only have three sons, so I know nothing
about daughters. Yes, and you have three daughters. And I
was uh talking to a friend of mine and she
was saying that she had the kids, the girls got
blowouts and all these things before school and all this stuff.
And I don't even know what a blowout is. I mean,
to me, that was a party. You you know what I
mean that it's a blow out, dude, let's go. That's
all I know. But then my brother has a daughter.
Speaker 3: Who is I think what a blowout is like something
that happens in a diaper.
Speaker 2: Yeah, a blot of diaper, blot of attire. I always thought,
you know, someone who said to me. I always thought, oh,
it's a blowout man. Uh. But then my brother has
and I would say, probably, I don't think you could
find like if you looked up American girl, this is
who comes up, right, American teenage girl. Right, she's just
she just turned thirteen. So my brother though, he has
a picture. He posts a picture first day of school,
and it's her walking into school, head down, hand raised
like kind of this sort of wave back to him
and but facing the door. And I said something to
my mom, and my mom goes, yeah, because he tortures her.
I go, what he's yelling out the window to her, Hey,
mal I love you. It's your daddy. I love you, mal,
I love you. You're walking into school. And I go, oh, yeah,
that's him. That makes sense.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I think about doing that, but I would I'd
get in trouble. I'd get killed for doing that.
Speaker 2: Well, I always think, like I don't know if girls
are more sensitive or not. I have no idea.
Speaker 3: I don't have any boys, so I don't know for sure,
and I.
Speaker 2: Can't tell you boys can be kind of sensitive. Like
at times, I'm like, WHOA what you know? Because in
my world it was always like, uh, it was just blunt,
you know, it was blunt. So that's what I just did.
I didn't know. And I see with my you know,
some of my sons, I go, Okay, I got that.
But I I not that girls are going to be
softer anyway. But I always thought if I had a daughter,
I think I would have been like just wrapped around
her finger I don't know that.
Speaker 6: Yeah, they've got me wrapped around their fingers for sure,
and there's no doubt about that.
Speaker 3: And and you know, in.
Speaker 6: My anecdotal experience as a parent of three daughters, you know,
for my three daughters, and it's different for everyone. I
gotta be you know, it's been my experience has been
I remember as a boy, as a kid, you know,
feeling certain things and being but always kind of like
trying to toughen up and not show it to other
people and let other people know. You know, my daughters
if you know, however, you know how they're feeling. When
they're feeling it.
Speaker 2: Well, my mother always said like, yeah. My mom always
said with my sister, she's like, oh god, it was
so hard because she would go toe to toe with
you on everything. But she said, but now, looking back,
I knew exactly where she was and what she stood.
She goes, you two the boys would tell me what
I wanted to hear and then go do what everyone
is to do anyway, no matter what. And I was like,
oh yeah, and my sister was more. Now that could
also just be personality. I'm sure there are girls who
byby did the same thing. But I do think that
I have always said I think women are more emotionally intelligent.
Speaker 6: Well yeah, I mean there's research that looks at that, right,
And I present on some of that in the class
that you'll take to the family class when we talk
about part family and partner counseling. There was a study
in twenty thirteen. They looked at the differences between men's
and women's brains using brain imaging, and you to put
in a nutshell, they basically suggested that most women, and
this is really important, right, there's a lot of there's
you know, we'd see a spectrum of gender now, but
in this particular study, you know, most women they said
their brain was like a ball of wires. Everything was
connected to everything. The theory was that that's was helpful
from an evolutionary perspective because they needed to be good multitaskers,
they needed to be have a good memory, now, all
those things that come with having a really you know what,
you know, connected brain. Whereas men were more compartmentalized. It
was like we had a we got a bunch of boxes,
and there's a box for everything. You know, you've got
a box for the bills, you got a box for
you know, the podcast you've got, and then you've got
one box that has nothing in it. And that's the
box we go to when we experience stress. Like it's
like it's like turning on a So why men tend
to be so good at fishing. They like to fish
a lot, because you do not that a lot of
women don't fish too. But you know, it's just this
kind of monotonous task or sitting in front of the
TV and channel surfing, and it's like we put this
screensaver on and basically shut everything off.
Speaker 2: For a little while.
Speaker 6: Yeah, and according to this research, a lot of women
have a much harder time doing that, right and so,
and I tend to see that in my daughters.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and I think too, like to a certain point,
I kind of like knowing where you stand with somebody.
Speaker 3: Absolutely right, And it's an argument for women in leadership.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I think I agree. Yeah, I think that that's
always the case. But I also think sometimes like publicly,
and I've said this, and I don't know how people
think this or not, but I always go, you hear
women be very mean to other women, like behind their back,
and and somebody said to me, Wow, I think that's
last thing. I go, Really, we had two women run
for president of the United States and they didn't win
the popular vote. And majority of the humans in the
United States are women.
Speaker 3: It's an interesting.
Speaker 2: That's that's all say. I don't know what that means.
I don't know what it means. I think I'm obviously
I'm alluding to something, but I go, I'm not sure
if that's the case or not, but I go, boy,
it sure makes an argument of I don't trust that bitch,
which is terrible.
Speaker 6: But I go, yeah, I mean, I certainly hope we're
moving in the direction.
Speaker 2: I do too. I do too. I think we are.
I think I think we'll get there. But I don't know.
I just thought that was an interesting thing. Was well,
look at this. It's just that's how my dumb head works.
Sometimes I have to look at things. Something's not adding
up here.
Speaker 3: And it's important to look at things.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't want to overanalyze anything in life, but
I I there are certain things that just sort of
pop out at me that.
Speaker 6: I and this will be one of those things that
in class will be it will be fun. This will
be one of the reasons why I'm gonna love having
you as a student and you're going to be a
great addition to every class is because you're you're open minded,
You're willing to talk about these things, some of these things.
And there's it's my experience teaching in this program. And
you've got a lot of people coming from uh background
where you know, they want to help people, they want
to make a difference, right they and and so with that,
they've got some really strong values and uh it makes
for some difficult conversations, right and we're talking about things
like you know, in gender and we've got you know,
got two uh professors who specialize in working.
Speaker 3: With sex offenders.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 6: Actually, I'm really interested in having you meet them, yes, uh.
And and so a lot of conversations that we have
are difficult conversations. And I think that you're going to
you know, you're You're not the type of person who's
going to sit back and let other people have that
conversation all the time.
Speaker 3: You're going to be open minded. You're gonna put ideas
out there.
Speaker 4: Uh.
Speaker 3: And I'm excited for that.
Speaker 2: Yeah. And I I think I'm going to learn a
lot from a people like I hope. So, I mean,
you know, and I don't just mean that the instructors,
I mean the other people in the class as well.
Speaker 6: Yesterday, I thought the first it was the first night
of the family class. And the first thing I do
in that class is I have everyone go around and
tell me the number of years they've worked with families.
And I said, you can include the number of years
you've been in a family, right, And so everybody basically
gives their age, right, And at the end of it,
I think they had I added it all up. They
had four hundred and thirty four years experience working with families.
I have twenty eight, right, and so saying that's the
way you introduced that class, right, it's like, who's the
expert here. You've got four hundred and thirty four years experience,
I've got twenty eight. I'm sorry to tell you this
because you're paying for the class, but you know, you
don't know if this is going to go well, then
we're going to have to learn from each other.
Speaker 2: What happens to Now some people may avoid their family,
so they've withdrawn Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yep, there's that too.
Speaker 2: Yeah, or have had a few years where they just
took a sabbatical from the family. I guess.
Speaker 3: Well.
Speaker 6: The capstone assignment for that class is you do an
assessment and a treatment plan for your family of origin. Really, yes, yes,
So you know, actually assess the different patterns and things
that you'd be looking at and diagnosing in a family
if you were seeing them in practice, and then read
up a treatment plan. What do you think a family
like this if you were seeing them in practice? What
do you think the goals would be?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 6: You know when we noticed, when we first start to
notice improvement, you know, how we know that the goals
are achieved and we do that for everyone's family, and
a lot of times people have our hard time with
that assignment because the reasons you mentioned, right, they don't
know their family that well anymore. We've got students who
are international students who have had you know, you know,
tragic upbringings. You know, they don't have any family left, right,
and so we've always find ways for them to do
that assignment. I'll say, Okay, well, imagine that that person
you got to interview them, they're sitting in the chair,
ask them the questions, and imagine what they'll tell you
and write that stuff down, right. But yeah, this is
Those are more things that you're gonna explore a lot
more deeply as get into this.
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, well, I mean I just I thought of
something there. There's things. I'll save it for off mic
to tell you one thing, but there there was certainly
a uh not. It's funny because I have gone to
therapy for a number of years. My sister did, and
my brother had an experience with it, my mom did,
but my father wanted nothing to do with it, like nothing,
it's not for everybody, and used to say things like
and and I think really upset my mom because my
mom was a speech pathologist, and she would work for
any would go your feet off the PUSA society. What
you would.
Speaker 6: Say, which is, isn't it cool that now you're feeling
like he had something to do with you coming back
to school?
Speaker 2: So weird? The whole thing is weird, weird and wonderful,
weird and wonderful, you know, weird and wonderful.
Speaker 3: And a beautiful mess.
Speaker 6: Yeah.
Speaker 3: And I go.
Speaker 2: Even today somebody said to me, well, you know, are
you doing this then? And I go, yeah, everything's gonna
be fine. I'm not I'm not worried about any of this.
And and there are often times I'll go, is there
something wrong with me that I should be more upset
about X, Y or Z. I just it doesn't matter.
Speaker 6: You know, when there was a time in your life
where you would have been, oh gosh, it was enjoy
that you're not there anymore. That's one of the things
that comes with wisdom. It's one of the reasons why
this is a good time for you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's a it's a perfect time. And I appreciate
all the help with helping facilitate that because I think
this will be it's interesting.
Speaker 6: So Sunday morning, after so you came over Saturday night.
I had a big bondfire for my daughter and three
of her friends, and I threw it out there if
anybody wanted to come over for a beer. And so
you took me up on that with a couple of
guinness by the fire and talked and and based on
that conversation, the next day, I just I'm gonna throw
this out at Bill. I don't know, actually, I probably
maybe I'll I'll read it after a break or something.
But basically said, I might be absolutely crazy. This might
be you know, tell me if if you think that
this is, you know, insane, But I think it would
be really cool if you entered the program. Yeah you
could do something really cool with this. And yeah I was.
I was pleased when you had a positive response.
Speaker 2: I did. And then, well, you know what, speaking that,
we will take a short break, I'll tell you what
my mom Mom's reaction to all any Yeah, when we
come back, we'll get to that. Right after this, got
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Speaker 4: Everybody's bady, oh break like fast calls and freedom. Everybody
wants the same Old Thames.
Speaker 2: Tell me buck full of brains, my.
Speaker 4: Friends time of sway, I'm tired run him straight?
Speaker 3: Oh God, no, you still loo Bo.
Speaker 2: It's an interesting song that you turned me on to
this band, and now I'm I'm like seeing them sort
of pop up in people's like in the background on
one of my kids Instagram posts. I'm like, yeah, the
Red clay Strays, I'm really good.
Speaker 3: Yeah, his voice is fantastic.
Speaker 6: Yeah, but like in every all the songs sound different too, right,
It's yeah, they have like it sound like if you've
heard one Red Clay Stray songs, you've heard them all day. No,
they're all so different. There's one that almost sounds like
it's from the fifties. Oh I love that band.
Speaker 2: Yeah, they do a vocal a little bit of that
that old but I love those vocals. Yeah, really, yeah,
I love those vocals.
Speaker 3: It sounds almost like Bob Seger in some songs.
Speaker 2: Yeah. And I will always say I I always think, uh,
and maybe this is my own personal experience, like underrated
Bob Sieger, Like I really like a lot of his
songs when I listen back. Now, you know, being in radio,
the hits were jammed down your throat, right, people want
to hear The basis of pop radio was every time
I turn on the radio, I want to hear my
favorite song, right, And so you wanted that and sometimes
the old wow factors. Oh I love this, but that's
what a top forty station is based on the album stations.
But still it was the hits. People wanted to know
the hits. You know. It's like when you go see
a band and they go allright, from our new album.
Everybody gets up and goes to the bathroom. It gets
a beer, you know, because we don't. We like what
we like and we like the familiarity of that stuff,
and I think it's it'll it's interesting, But I agree.
Speaker 3: I used to like Weez this Sunday morning radio music show.
Speaker 2: So I'm pretty sure he's going to do that again.
Oh really, yeah, I think that on the weekends he's
going to do this. I don't know if I'm allowed
to say this. One. I watched that Somebody's coming in here,
but they're in the wrong spot. So not today. I
just knew he was. It happens not today, Not today,
the older guy, not today. Sorry, yeah, Dune. Yes, I
think that I shouldn't say this because then it's revealing
that I know more than I will ever let on.
But yes, I believe on Saturdays and Sundays that will
be the brother of Wiz music. Show for a little while.
Speaker 3: That would be cool, like they hear the they would
play deeper tracks.
Speaker 2: And deeper tracks great things people didn't know about. I
think he was instrumental in bringing not that they wouldn't
have had it without wheeze, I'm not saying that, but
I think he brought some great music like Susan Tedesky
and Derek Trucks and you know, and he's kind of
responsible for introducing them to each other and uh all
that music. Yeah, so I think that that that'll be
it'll be back from what I understand that's going to do. Yeah,
So I don't know what else is happening over there,
but I got to tell you, like, people make fun
of me because I and I've been trying very very
hard to uh not be this way. But I had
at one point, probably like one hundred and twenty unread
text messages. Yeah yeah, no, no, just in general, right,
just in general. So I've been trying to stay ahead
of that. I'm at fifteen right now, but it's been
all day. I've been trying to keep up with you.
Too bad. Nah, that's not bad at all. That's manageable, right,
that's way more manageable. Than the other.
Speaker 6: I feel honor because I hear the guys on the
podcast talk about how you don't get back to anybody and.
Speaker 3: You always get right back. I still feel good about that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, there are certain people in my life that I
get back to right away. I don't know. I'm trying
to do that. I'm trying to do that better. Actually,
somebody said to me once that because everybody, let's talk
about this for a second, because I love your perspective
on it, the idea that we're busy. And a friend
just said to me, no one has the corner on busy.
And she was talking about how busy things are for
her and stuff like that, and yeah, it is, but
nobody has the corner on busy. And I started to think,
the more you talk about being busy, the less time
you have you talk about self fulfilling prophecy in a sense,
the less time you have, or you just don't see
the enjoyment in it, and then things become a grind.
And I'm a big believer in you know, there's a path,
many paths to the same destination. I could take the
back roads up to Buffalo, or I could take ninety,
or I could take whatever, and you'll get there. One's
a little rougher, one may be a prettier ride, one
may be a quicker ride. But it's all and kind
of how you do it. So you can grind this
out or you can kind of enjoy things. But the
busy is it's an interesting one for me because I
see that, and so my excuse was always busy. And
then someone said to me, they're friends with Jimmy Kim
and they go, you know, what always gets back to
me like right away Jimmy Kim. And I went what
And they go, yeah, like if I write something, you know,
if I send him a text him, he gets right
back to you, like.
Speaker 3: Immediately, takes less time, just get back to it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I went, oh my gosh, cause there's so
many times like I'll get to that person later. I'll
give I'll get it, no big deal, I'll give you.
Speaker 3: You know, don't worry.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And it's it's bad because then it's like, well,
then obviously there's a pecking order that all of us
fall in somebody else's life. I get that, but why
not if we want to talk about making people, you know,
you often think like who do you want to be? Around. Well,
you want to be around people that make you feel
good and make you feel like you mad or and
I do, well, don't you? And so you get you
get back to people. And I thought, wow, that's really
interesting because the person said, yeah, I know, like I go,
that guy's got to have a million things going on.
And I said, yeah, and I can tell you this.
I don't know, but I know that I know that
fallin like with I mean, oh.
Speaker 3: He seems to be doing everything now too.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but he would sit down on FaceTime with I
remember being on FaceTime with Damien's just spend an hour
just shooting the shit like and those people who may
give you I still say, I don't know where you
fall in this either, but I would always say to
my boys, and I always think of it for myself, well,
when people are willing to give you their time, it's
the greatest gift they can actually give you because no
one knows how much you have of it. And I
always think those people who seem to have the least
like or more important things to do that we would say,
seem to give you the most at times.
Speaker 6: Yeah, it does feel that way sometimes, Yeah, I agree.
The busy thing that can become a self fulfilling prophecy.
I often say, there's no, there's not levels of being overwhelmed.
Speaker 3: Right.
Speaker 6: Once you're overwhelmed, you're overwhelmed. Do you know where that
word overwhelmed comes from? No, it's a really actually it
might be my favorite word origin.
Speaker 3: So I'll say it.
Speaker 6: So back in you know, back in the day when
most boats were made out of wood, and they'd use
wood slats. They would put the wood slats together, they
would put a little bead of of glue between them,
and then they dip them down into the water just
so that there was like an inch above the water
to push all of the wood slats together and get
the boat to seal itself. And that was called whelming
when you would put the water would and so if
you pushed it down a little bit too much and
water went into the boat, it was overwhelmedhel right, And
there's not different stages of overwhelmed. Right, Once you push
once the once you're taking in water, you're taking in water, right, And.
Speaker 2: So yeah, and it's what's a tip for then somebody
who feels overwhelmed, So you have.
Speaker 6: Any like well, this goes back to what you were
saying before about it seems like the people who are
the busiest also tend to have the most time to
give to you and that kind of thing, right that, Yeah,
kind of ironically, what I would have someone who feels
really overwhelmed do is engage in some kind of mindfulness,
meditation practice something like that, which takes time. Right, it's
gonna make the first response to that is, I don't
have time for that shit, right, I'm overwhelmed.
Speaker 3: I just told her, I'm overwhelmed. I don't have time
to sit and just be.
Speaker 6: But it's those are the types of things that we
can do to get ourselves to the type of place
that you described being in earlier.
Speaker 3: Right, you you listen to a.
Speaker 6: Podcast of yours last week where you talked about how
you forgot your keys at the at the at the
why right, and you went home and you're just like,
all right, well, I guess I'm just gonna go back
and get them. And you know, maybe there's a reason
why this happened, and I maybe I wasn't supposed to
like do something today, And and so people who look
at things that way tend to be less overwhelmed, tend
to get more done, and they also tend to be
the people who do things like, you know, practice meditation
and mindfulness and spend quality time with other people, because
you know that if you're just being busy all the.
Speaker 3: Time, you're gonna get overwhelmed. You're gonna burn out.
Speaker 2: Right. I agree that the burnout I think is a
is a is a real thing because you you sort
of fry your own circuits. You're not giving yourself time.
And I don't know that. I it's not long like
I've been doing. I told you the five minute Journal.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I love that.
Speaker 2: And I think today I woke up and I think
I was grumpy, like right off the bat, and I
couldn't come up with things that yesterday. It wasn't wine.
I was thinking to things like what am I grateful for?
I don't even know. I'm like, I'm thinking of my head.
And then I go, I got a cool car to drive? Yeah,
And then have you done it yet? Have you taken
it around? I did it today? Would you do?
Speaker 3: Did you do the power shot?
Speaker 2: No, not the power shot, but the power shot? You could.
I would wait till I'm like on the express I'm afraid. Yeah, yeah,
on the Expressway. You just make sure it's a little open.
Speaker 6: You's the same Dodge charger the bill has. That's what
we're talking about.
Speaker 2: The Dodge charger, right, And I there are times where
if I'm going around, so there was a green light
and I needed to make a right and so I go.
I'm not I took my foot off the accelerator, but
you're going on a certain speed and those things it
will hug. It just hugs the turn. So I crank
it and I punch it in the back end kicks
a little.
Speaker 5: It.
Speaker 2: I just love that. I don't know why I shouldn't
even admit that I do that, but I love that.
It's such a great like it's heavy. Those batteries make
it heavy, so it handles so well. But yes, I'm
grateful for that. And I'm grateful for you know, the
studio and my big comfortable bed, and you keep it
kind of simple.
Speaker 6: Well even more simple though, right. I mean, that's it's
not about having big things to be grateful for, you know.
Practicing gratitude is recognizing the little things that you know, today,
they made my coffee right right, like in Starbucks. Half
the time, I have a fancy coffee that is awesome.
When they make it right. And they don't make it right,
I feel like I wasted all my money and it
pisses me off. And so when they made it good today,
so I'm grateful for that. I'm grateful for pants that
I don't have to iron, right, I'm kind of grateful
that it's a little bit cooler today because you know,
I'm looking forward to the fall.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 6: So it's just little stuff like that, and then when
you practice it enough, as silly as it sounds, it
becomes it happened, right. It's like letting down a hill, right,
first time you sled down a hill, it's you've got to,
you know, kind of beat down that trail. And then
every time you go down and again it becomes quicker
and faster and easier.
Speaker 3: And so now you're.
Speaker 6: Scanning your environment for things that you're grateful for when
you're not even trying. Yeah, that's where it's at, right,
Like when I'm when I I know when I'm doing well,
when I'm busy and and doing a lot of things
and not overwhelmed and not getting too upset about it.
It's it's when I'm in that headspace where you know,
I'm kind of naturally surveying my environment for things that
I'm grateful for. I'm in that mindset of and I've
heard you talk about this too, right, I get to
do this insteady you have to do yeah?
Speaker 2: Right? And yeah. I like that kind of thinking a
little bit better. It softens something. Doesn't mean I'm not
going to do It's the same thing. I'm just looking
at the same thing from a different perspective. But one
of the things that has come out in one of
the classes was with doctor McGinnis where he said he
asked everybody, what's the one hard thing you did today?
And I, of course couldn't really think I hadn't done
anything that hard.
Speaker 3: That day go to class for the first time.
Speaker 2: A lot of people were saying, you know, there was
that No. I said that the hard thing I did
was sift through my fifteen year old's laundry to make
sure he had socks and underwear because he had his
fit picked out. But I knew there were the basics
weren't done, and so I made sure that that was done,
folded and left for him. Uh, And everybody left, but that,
you know, But the thing was that started to remind
me of hard things, and like when you take a
if you take a boot camp class or one of
these classes, sometimes the instructor will yell out you can
do hard things, right. I remember in boxing they would
you had to hang and they would throw a medicine
ball at your stomach, right because you're gonna be getting
punched in the stomach. Punched in the stomach. Yeah, yeah, yeah,
and so and I think you can do hard things.
You can do hard things. When when doctor McGinnis said this,
it brought me back to I gotta start doing the
cold shower again. And the only reason is because you go,
I did that, and there there's a satisfaction to that.
And I think when you feel like and Jordan was
my son, was in here. He said about making the bed,
which I go, well, I bet you don't. He goes,
I don't, but that it gives you that sense of accomplishment.
I did something today, and that to me can help
with the overwhelming sure, you know, because of the yes,
start the day with the win. And so I've been
like two days now, I've been the cold shower. I
don't even know if I'm making it thirty seconds I
was going to almost two minutes in the.
Speaker 3: Th that's cool.
Speaker 6: That's impressive. I know doctor McGinnis does that too. Yes, yeah,
you guys got to keep on each other.
Speaker 2: And I started I started thinking, I go, well, you
feel better when you when you actually do hard things.
It's okay, it's a good thing. Like today, I knew
my schedule is going to be a little different today,
and so I got up and on certain days I walk,
and in certain days I go to the gym. Today
would be a gym day. I couldn't get there because
at the time I needed to be there, I had
an appointment, and I just went for the walk, and
I'm like, you gotta do these things because it is
that I did this.
Speaker 6: One thing you're going to hear over and over again
in the program is learning how to get comfortable with
being uncomfortable. Yeah, and that's like a you hear it
all the time in any kind of therapy training program, right,
you need to learn to get comfortable with being uncomfortable.
For me, like hiking and doing that stuff in the
mountains is one of the ways that you know, I
was really able to embrace that. But it's it's really true.
It's important. I think we're wired to be uncomfortable. I
think every day we should be a little bit uncomfortable.
I feel like, oddly enough, again, that really helps our
mental health. And you know, that's one of the struggles sometimes,
you know, teaching a lot of younger folks who haven't
had a lot of life experience. Is you know, the
hardest thing or the worst thing you've been through is
the worst thing you've been through, right, And so it's
another reason why having you know a student like you
in the class who can offer a different perspective.
Speaker 2: I've been through a lot. I mean, my god, divorced, okidding,
I laugh, I say that joking. There used to be
a T shirt for the Rolling Stones. They go, the
Rolling Stones have survived divorce, bankruptcy, addiction, blah blah. It
was just really shitty things and it made me laugh.
Speaker 3: I go, yeah, at some point, if you live long enough.
Speaker 2: Yes, and I went, okay, but none of it. I think,
like we were. I was brought up in a world where, oh,
my god, like the sky's falling. Everything was chicken little,
you know what I mean, The sky's falling, The sky
is falling, and you start to realize like, no, it's not.
And if you're not doing things to make yourself happy.
And oh, by the way, one of the things I
I almost see I again, like in these classes and things,
I wanted to almost dovetail on what doctor McGinnis had said.
But by the way, oh he is, Oh I didn't
know that. Oh that's awesome. Yeah, oh wow, oh, because
I thought there was some I don't know. I have
to go back. You'll have your meeting with him and oh, right,
this will be great.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So he was, uh, he was talking about you know,
doing hard things and and how now I might trying
to thought is off. That's exciting to know.
Speaker 6: I'm it's okay because emotions are temporary, Like I feel
like every day and this is one of the things
I'm I feel like I'm getting better at over as
I'm getting older, and maybe it's less testosterone and and
uh after you know, meaning deep and doing some.
Speaker 3: Of that work.
Speaker 6: But you know, it feels like every day something happens
where you're like, this is the worst thing that possibly right,
Like this is the word. It totally throws you off,
and uh and you know, eventually, regardless of what it is,
it always ends up passing.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 6: Yeah, And so you're learning that emotions are temporary. And
I think that that's another big part of why we
want to be able to why we want to do
hard things right. We need to learn that emotions are temporary.
Speaker 2: Right, And I think, but you you feel better, you
feel like you've accomplished something. You you're doing something, even
this right, going back to school at fifty four years old. Oh,
I never put a light on you. I have been
so out of my head, out of my No, No,
it's fine. I'm looking over I go wow, oh okay,
And then before I'm gonna have to strip audio from
a video now because I missed that.
Speaker 3: Like, did you get an intern yet?
Speaker 2: No? This is all like I've just no, this is
like my first day in here. I feel like I'm
just come bumbling around like Bambi on ice. I don't
know what happened. Yes, hard things. I think it sort
of centers you. I'm I've been meditating for a number
of years. I don't know that I do it right.
I sit for ten minutes and I just try to
concentrate on my breath. I do think that there's something
there's not I think that there but again, like that's
that's the thing, and I and you and I talked
about this at the Bonfire where it's like manifest right,
I said, it's become a buzzword. And I love it
that it's used in this one like progressive commercial where
the guy's out someplace and she goes, you know, you
can bundle your boat and trailer and all this. Here
he goes, there's a beautiful spot. She goes, you better
do it before other people find it, and all of
a sudden, here and there's a big crowd and the
scirl goes, Hi, fam just out here manifesting. And I go,
it's it's become this buzzword.
Speaker 3: And mindfulness to kind of to some extent, become this buzzword.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And I I was one I used to write
when I was in radio, especially when I did the
show with Tommy, that I would write at the top
of the page, be present always, because I do think
that that's it's very very important and mindfulness is the thing.
And at that time I was reading a lot of
Tick not Han. I'm not sure if you're familiar with him.
He's a Vietnamese exiled monk, and yeah, and really very
very you know, there is no death, you know, this
sort of thing, but you do great videos and stuff
tick nott Han and I just found that those things
kind of ground you. And when I don't do it,
that's when the overwhelming comes in. It's amazing, that's when
I lose it. Yeah.
Speaker 3: It really makes a difference.
Speaker 2: It does, It makes it. It makes a huge difference.
I'm very excited about this. I'm now. I'm excited to
know that doctor McGinnis is my advisor.
Speaker 6: Yes, yeah, yeah, well and we'll have so I don't
know what elective you plan on taking there. He'll talk
to you about those options. But one of them is
that complimentary treatment methods course.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, okay, that's awesome.
Speaker 6: It would be cool if it worked out that that
you took that with us. And yeah, though, this is
so cool. I'm so excited.
Speaker 2: Well I am too, and I thank you very much
for bringing the opportunity or raising it, because I wanted
to tell you that was it, and you wanted to
say something as well. My mother, so I my education
was a big thing and I always joked for many
many years that I'm the least educated in my family.
My brother is a masters, my sister is a doctor
in linguistics, my mother as a master's and my father
had everything but the dissertation, basically with philosophy. And yeah,
so when this came about, I called her and she's like,
you got to do it, you have to. I think
this is wonderful. And then I like, you know, I
get a couple of calls throughout the day, and then
one of them and she gets mad when I mock
her because she doesn't really sound like this. But this
is how I've always heard my mother. In my head.
She's going, oh my god, this. I have been praying
and praying that something would just work out for you
because I know things have been just it's hard. I
know it's hard. I know you and Jameson and I worry.
I worry so much, that's the thing. But she was
so excited. I don't even know. It's not really and
what he's heard my mom, That's not really how she sounds.
And but yet in my head, god, I could I
even do it to her face sometimes and she'll go
that's not me, and I go, oh, it is, at
least in my head.
Speaker 3: In that same me.
Speaker 2: But she was super, super excited and was the first
person I called, and she said to me what I
have said, and it's what I feel like I've just
lost myself in the moment. I don't know. And here's
what I mean by that. She said to me, don't
talk to a lot of people about this.
Speaker 3: Go forth until no one yeah.
Speaker 2: And I went, yeah. She goes, you don't want a
lot of opinions. And I did talk to a few
people and one person, only one person, but very kindly,
just said, you know, fifty four, can he be a
student again? And I and if you think you can,
thenk go for it. That's great. There was nobody who
said don't do that? What's wrong with you? Even my
college roommate wrote me today about something completely different, asking me, hey,
is South still coming back? And I don't know, but
I'm going. And he goes, that's awesome. That's awesome.
Speaker 6: So and you'll be you know what you'll be. It's
an expedited track. So you'll be done May twenty twenty seven.
You know, it's not even two years.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know you'll be done.
Speaker 3: I mean, it means it, it means it's pretty rigorous.
Speaker 2: Yes it is.
Speaker 3: But man's that time is going to go so quick.
Speaker 2: It is going to go quick. And uh yeah, buckle up,
here we go. We buckle up, all right, we will uh,
we'll close it out. I appreciate you coming in on
a rainy day.
Speaker 6: Most fun when you go pick up my youngest daughter
from her first day of school.
Speaker 2: Now, oh wonderful, your youngest daughter for the first day
of school. And then you have one who's a field
hockey star.
Speaker 6: Ava, She's she's a senior at Mendon. She's got her
first game of the season this year. It'll be her
last high school season, so I'm gonna make every single
game for sure.
Speaker 2: Uh.
Speaker 3: And then yeah, my oldest is living up any hurt
in the around, Yeah.
Speaker 2: I know, I saw that, a hurt in the aeronics.
You go that for an entire semester.
Speaker 3: Professor's paddle out to her each week.
Speaker 2: That is amazing to me. Who even knew that?
Speaker 6: I go, what an opportunity of electronics, no running water? Wow,
writing all her assignments and kind.
Speaker 2: Of paper this I can't imagine. How How old is she? Nineteen? Yeah?
How many other nineteen year olds are living like that?
Speaker 3: Just eleven on the island with her?
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's pretty pretty cool, very cool for doctor Rice
on Bill Moran. We'll see you on Monday. Go Bill.
Speaker 3: Side whatever in the dark flow murder a rat.
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