Speaker 1: Don't think about it. By William W. Stewart. Tommy wasn't
really a timid child. Sometimes he didn't understand things and
was puzzled. More Often grown ups couldn't or wouldn't understand
things that were perfectly clear to him, and he was
more puzzled. Occasionally such things worried and even upset him
a little. Then Mamma and sometimes Daddy would translate bafflement
in the silly adult terms and think that he was afraid.
It was that way about the hole in the closet
when Tommy was just a bit over three. Tommy wasn't
really afraid. Mister Bhaer was afraid, and the thing did
puzzle Tommy, so he asked about it, but he never
did get any sensible or satisfactory answers, and that did
worry and perhaps even upset him a little. But he
wasn't afraid even before Daddy finally told him, now, Tommy boy,
don't think about it, and it won't scare you. Really,
there's nothing there to hurt you if you just don't
think about it. So don't you think about it any more.
There's Daddy's big boy. This certainly was not any sort
of explanation, but still Tommy did try hard not to
think about it, as Daddy said, and now he really
doesn't think about it at all any more, or about
Aunt Martha either. The hole was in the closet in
Tommy's room. Tommy and Mamma and Daddy lived in a
not very big, not very new frame house on the
edge of the city, and Aunt Martha lived with them.
Tommy didn't, at least not yet, although there were promises
have any brothers or sisters, but he did have his
own room and a family of his own too. It
was the extra bedroom, and it had a closet that
was cramped and with no light. Tommy liked his room.
It was small, with a small bed, and it belonged
to him along with his family of Mister Bear and
Old Rabbit and Kochi Koala. It was also an easy
crying range of Mamma and Daddy's room in Aunt Martha's room,
so if Mister Bear, who was the timid one, got
frightened in the night, Tommy could cry purely in mister
Bear's behalf to bring help or at least company. Tommy
and his family all liked the closet well enough too,
except for the shelf that was out of reach even
from the don't climb stool. The closet was good to
hide in or play bear cave or rabbit hole, and
fine for finding missing toys after Mama had a spell
of playing cleaning house. The day Tommy found the hole
in the closet was the week after his third birthday.
Daddy was at work, Mamma was out chopping. It was
a rainy afternoon. Aunt Martha was sitting with Tommy in
the afternoon television. He was in his room with his family,
and they all agreed as soon as they heard the
television coming on strong that it would be a very
poor afternoon to waste on a nap. Besides, mister Bear's
feelings had been hurt by having been somewhat left out
of things recently in favor of new birthday presents now
largely broken or tiresome. To make it up to him, Tommy,
an old Rabbit, and Kokey all agreed to play bear
cave in the closet. It was a nice game and
going well enough, except for some grumblings from Koki Koala,
who always wanted to argue and claim that bears lived
in trees, not caves. But then and it was mister
Bear's fault for wanting it darker so he could hibernate.
The closet door shut tight. That didn't seem so serious
at first. It would only mean a scolding for being
out of bed when Aunt Martha would come to open
it after Tommy hollered loud enough. And then there was
the hole in the closet, back in the corner, next
to the broken drum. They all saw it, and they
heard the ugly thing talking or thinking at them. It
stretched out a part of itself at mister Bear, who
was the closest. It didn't grab mister Bear, but he
was terrified just the same. And none of them liked it.
They didn't like it at all. The ugly thing couldn't
come out of the hole because the hole wasn't big
enough yet, but it tried, and it was making the
hole bigger, and it kept thinking at them, red thoughts
and hungry as it tore at the edges of the hole.
The family all looked at Tommy, so Tommy cried and yelled.
Finally Aunt Martha heard him and came to open the door.
Then the afternoon sunlight streamed across the floor into the closet,
and the ugly red thoughts from the thing pulled back
far back so you could barely notice them, and you
couldn't see the hole anymore, even though you knew it
was still there, at least Tommy and mister Bear, an
old rabbit, and Kochi Kohala knew. After she opened the
closet door and carried Tommy from the closet to the
living room, Aunt Martha scolded. She wasn't really mad, because
she had waited until a commercial interrupted her television program
before answering the cries from the closet, But she scolded
because she was Aunt Martha, and scolding is what Aunt
Martha did. A really good cry, even one worked up
strictly as a service for a companion, takes a little
time to turn off. Then, after a few settling gulps,
Tommy tried to explain, Auntie Aunt Martha, there's a hole
in the cave in the closet, and there's a thing
inside of it. He looked at mister Bear, whom he
was holding by one foot, and at Kochi, dropped by
Aunt Martha on the sofa for confirmation. Then quickly he
wriggled down from Aunty's lap Old Rabbit bravely. Tommy ran
to the closet and was relieved the door was open,
and in the gray afternoon light, the hole was still
not to be seen. Old Rabbit, who always had a
bad temper, was annoyed and snappish at having been left behind.
But he was there and all right. Tommy rescued him
and ran back to Aunt Martha. It was hungry, he
continued his explanation. Aunt Martha, as always was difficult. Who
is hungry? You shouldn't be hungry, Tommy. You just had
your lunch an hour ago. Do you want a glass
of milk? Not me hungry? Tommy was impatient. Aunt Martha
never seemed able to grasp any idea more complex than
a glass of milk or wet pants. Little boys, in
her mind nearly always either wanted the one or had
the other. Such things she could and did attend to
with a virtuous sense of duty done, but anything else
was beyond her. Tommy, are your pants wet? Tommy sighed
in resignation and wet his pants. It was the only
thing to do, Otherwise Aunty would fuss and fume. Accomplishing nothing,
understanding nothing for the rest of the afternoon. Ten minutes later,
in dry pants, he finished an unwanted glass of milk.
Aunt Martha, conscience appeased, returned to soap opera. Tommy and
his family napped safely Forgotten played away the afternoon, but
not in a closet or even as was usual on
rainy days, in Tommy's room. Instead, finding Daddy's old briefcase
full of papers. They played office in the family room,
with old Rabbit grumbling about having to be miss Wixi,
who drove the electric typewriter in Daddy's office. Mamma and
Daddy came home together at a bit after five. Tommy
took his scolding about messing up Daddy's papers in good
part he had expected it, but Aunt Martha was angry
about the scolding she got for letting him mild, though
it was in retaliation. She said, Tommy, you are a naughty,
naughty boy, and for being so naughty, you must take
your big bear and your rabbit and the little bear
or whatever the thing is, and put them away in
the closet and leave them there till tomorrow. No, no, no, no,
I won't. It isn't fair. There weren't bad, and the
ugly thing in the hole, and it might come out,
and it's hungry, and and my family is all afraid Tommy.
Aunt Martha's voice was sharp. You stop that nonsense and
put your toys. Wait, Wait up now, said Daddy, who
also lived in the grown up world, but who sometimes
tried to understand things. What is this about a hole
in the closet? What about something being hungry? That's all,
said Tommy. The ugly thing in the hole in the closet,
it is hungry. There was more to it than that,
of course, But how could a thing like that be
explained through a wall grown closed minds. There was the
hole in the closet. You couldn't exactly see it, You
could only sort of feel seeing it. And the hairy thing,
at least it seemed harry and shapeless, were having made
any different shapes, and a mouth and sharp teeth, And
it had reached out with something and touched mister Bear
and would have eaten him too if he had blood.
But then it had pulled back from mister Bear, and
red hunger thoughts came stronger and stronger even now, stretching
out from the hole where it was hidden in the closet.
Tommy could feel the reaching, greedy thoughts, but he couldn't
explain all that there is a hole in the closet,
Tommy said again, But he knew that not even Daddy
would understand. Of course Mama wouldn't, not Mama, who was
loving but very busy, and just sat so often dreaming
or listening to baby's sister that they said was in
her stomach so big and fat now as to leave
little lap room. Mama was too occupied looking inward to
look out much at Tommy. Daddy, to give him credit,
was nearly always will in the look, but there were
so many things he couldn't see. Still, Tommy had to
try the ugly thing in the hole? You want something
to eat, Oh, Tommy, Such horrible nonsense, that was mamma.
She wasn't even going to think about it. It is
a question sometimes whether baby's sisters are worth all the
bother in the trouble. Now, Tommy, Daddy was being helpful.
You say there is a hole in your closet, and
that there's something in the hole. Well sort of, Really,
the ugly thing wasn't so much in the hole as
on the other side. Of it. But that was close enough,
all right. Then, Tommy, suppose you show it to me?
What show me the hole? Tommy? Now, yes, the hole
in the closet. Tommy, Yes, Daddy, this wasn't going to
work out anything good, and Tommy didn't want to go
back to the closet and close the closet door. Anyway,
the thing didn't eat mister Bear because mister Barrett didn't
have blood, but Daddy had and Tommy they went to
the closet at least if he was risking a Daddy,
Tommy thought he was protecting mister Bear and the others. Now,
where's this hole, Tommy? Over there by the corner, Tommy pointed.
Daddy went into the closet to look. Tommy started to
close the door. In the black dark, Daddy would see
what Tommy meant about the thing in the hole from
the outside. Tommy started to close the door. It was
a small closet and hardly big enough for both of them. Tommy,
what are you trying to do? Open that door? But
after all, the hole wasn't there, or scarcely seemed to
be there except in the dark. Open it up wider. Hum,
I believe I do see wait till I get my lighter. Say,
by George, I believe you're right. There is a little
hole there, looks like a mouse hole there. It was,
as Tommy might have known, crown ups will always avoid
seeing the important things. Of course, there was a mouse
hole there, the home of little old mister mouse with
the wiggly nose and the gray whiskers. He had been nice,
but he wasn't there any more. And Tommy had a
pretty clear idea of what had happened to him, that
poor little old mister mouse had had blood. But Daddy,
it was hopeless. Dorry, Martha, Daddy's hunting and stink was aroused.
Have we got a mouse trap? Any cheese? There's a
hole in that closet, a little old mousehole, and I'm
going to well, perhaps this would be better than if
he hadn't found anything. Tommy followed Daddy about as he
finally located a mouse trap, no cheese. He cut a
little piece of meat for bait. Of course, Tommy knew
no trap would catch the ugly thing. When in the
world happened to my lighter, Daddy wanted to know. Tommy
didn't answer that, But at least everybody even Aunt Martha
had forgotten about shutting Tommy's family up in the closet.
For now that was enough, But later, after supper, after bath,
after the shooting picture on the TV, it was time
for bed. Daddy, get on to bed now, son, past bedtime.
Hop to it, Daddy. I want to sleep with you
and Mamma tonight. Well it was a mighty dark night.
The afternoon rain had built up into a real storm.
Mister Bear was terrified. Kokie was scared. An even tough
old rabbit didn't want to sleep in Tommy's room with
the ugly thing in the hole, so hungry and waiting
to rip its way out of the hole when it
got dark enough, and only the street light outside the
room to keep away the dark because they would never
let Tommy keep his light on at night. My family
and me don't want to sleep in my room tonight. Now, Tommy,
just because it's a little stormy, Daddy's big boy isn't
afraid of a little wind and rain. I'm not afraid, Daddy.
It's my family. You know how families are. You always
say about mama. Never mind that, Now to bed your
own bed. But Daddy, there's the ugly thing in the hole,
and it's hungry the mouse. Daddy went to look at
his trap, switching on the light in Tommy's room. He
came back in a minute, old devil, did Daddy know? No,
the little devil got away with the bait, clean as
a whistle. Only a little plaster dust or something left
in the trap where I put the meat. Mister Bear shivered.
Not don't be foolish, bear, you don't have blood. The
ugly thing won't get you, Tommy told him softly. But
mister Bear wouldn't listen. He was a cry baby, a
scaredy cat. But to tell the truth, the real, honest truth,
the whole family and even Tommy didn't feel too good
about it. Tommy, what was that you were saying? Daddy,
I want to sleep with you and Mama, Me and
my family were scared of that thing. Tommy knew it
was no less than his duty to protect them all. Oh, now, Tommy,
you don't mean to say you're afraid of a little
old mouse, that big boy like you. Well, mister Bear
is I don't, Daddy. It is there, honest. It is
in that hole, and it's hungry, and it'll come out
in the darken Tommy, a little mouse, get on into
your room now, and no more argument. Tommy's face began
to crumple. If he had to, he would fight this
one out all the way. Tears, tantrum, kick, scream, gasp,
hold his breath and turn blue. Now now, Tommy boy,
Daddy did mean well, and sometimes he was even right,
and so Tommy always did try to do it. Daddy said, Tommy,
you mustn't let things like that bother you. If we
can't catch the little mouse, forget it. There's nothing more
we can do. So just don't think about it, you see, sniff, No,
don't think about it, that's all. There is nothing there
that can hurt you if you just don't think about it.
So don't think about it. That's Daddy's big boy. Well,
and then can we sleep with you? And mama Aunt
Martha rang in her nichols Worth. The boy ought to
be ashamed to be afraid of a little mouse. It's
not not what uh, it's mister bear that's afraid of
the And you just stop that nonsense about those ridiculous
stuffed animals, you hear me. Nobody should make such a
fuss about a little mouse. Mama does Mama, Tommy let
two fat tears trickle down his cheeks a warning, but
he meant them too. Mama, huh, can't we all right?
All right, stop this stupid wrangling. You know how it
gets on my nerves. For goodness sake. Let him sleep
with us tonight anyway. I don't blame him. I wouldn't
sleep a wink in the same room with a mouse.
Be sure you shut our door tonight tight. You're spoiling
that child, said Aunt Martha. Sourly. Auntie said, Tommy, I
bet your chicken. Let your door stay open. Well, huffed
Aunt Martha, the impertinence. I certainly shall keep my door open.
No mouse is going to keep me from getting good
fresh air. Tommy was a very bright little boy. Now
with the door shutting Mama and Daddy's room and Aunt
Martha's door open, you wouldn't think about the ugly thing
in the hole waiting for dark, real dark to come
out and eat. All right, Tommy, this once you can
sleep with your mother and me. Go to bed, and
mind you sleep quiet, and don't spread those stuff your
family all over to bed either. Yes, Daddy and Daddy,
what I won't think about it now? In the hole.
Tommy said his good nights tonight. He even kissed Aunt
Martha as if he meant it, and he took his
family and he went to bed in Mom and Daddy's room.
He did not think about the ugly thing. He went
right to sleep, lying at the edge of the big,
big bed. Tommy and old Rabbit and Coochi Koala and
even mister Bear went right to sleep. Outside. The wind
blew hard and harder, and the rain drove down, and
it was dark. The television reception was bad. Everyone went
to bed early, good night lights out. In Tommy's room,
it was quite dark, with only the faint, watery rays
of the street lights on the corner swimming in through
the rain. In the closet there was a stirring, a fumbling,
a tearing, and the hole in the blackness grew was
forced bigger wider, as the thing pushed and ripped at
whatever was barring it from the warm, red, oozing food.
It craved, it must have it would have, And in
a sudden gust, the wind blew harder. Still Somewhere in
town blocks away, a wire fell and blue sparks flashed
and crackled in the dripping night. In Tommy's house, the
refrigerator went off, the electric clock stopped, the street light
blinked once and was gone. And in Tommy's closet there
was a sudden, mighty surge of effort, a break, and
something not a sound, but something, a harsh and bloody
sense or feel of rending greed, flowing outward from the
closet in a wave. Aunt Martha, in her sleep said no, oh, no,
Daddy in her own to the snore with a strained grunt.
Mama whimpered softly and hugged to herself her swollen stomach.
Tommy blinked and was awake. Soothingly. He patted Kochi and
Old Rabbit. He squeezed mister Bear's paw. Then he slipped
his hand into the opening and mister Bear's overalls and
took out Daddy's cigarette. Later he knew how to work it,
but first he waited. Don't think about it, Daddy had
told him, and he didn't think about it, really, but
he couldn't help feeling it. The ugly thing was out,
clear out of the hole now and moving. He could
feel that, and the awful hunger moving with it. Aunt
Martha's room was closest, and her door was open. Mom
and Daddy's room was closed. The ugly thing moved fast, faster,
and reached out, dursting hungering. From Aunt Martha's room came
the quavering wail, and from the thing there flowed a
sense of vicious evil. Joy. There it was, But was
it enough? Tommy hugged mister Bear once tightly and slipped
noisily from the bed. He wasn't thinking about it. He couldn't,
he wouldn't think about it, but he knew what he
had to do. He had the lighter at the bedroom door.
He worked it, opened the door a crack, thrust it out,
and then in a little rush back to bed, where
he lay quietly, and he didn't think about it. He
and mister Bear an old rabbit and cookie Koala. After
a little the sense of feeding hunger was gone, and
the feel of the ugly thing was gone, back into
the hole in the closet, forced back by the flickering
yellow light of the flames started by the cigarette lighter. Then,
when the smell of smoke grew thick in the room
and he could hear the crackling of fire burning the house,
Tommy shook Daddy awake. It wasn't hard to get out
through the bedroom window except for Mamma, but she made
it all right. And Tommy had a little trouble, holding
tightly to each member of his family as Daddy lifted
him out of the window, but they made it all
right too. Of course, Aunt Martha didn't make it, how
could she. But it was fun watching the fireman in
the rain from the Krafsmyer's porch next door, as the
house and the closet with the hole all burned up together,
Aunt Martha. Funny thing. Tommy heard one of the firemen
say to another the next day in the sunshine as
they looked over the smoldering ash. The old bat must
have been as dry as dust inside. Twenty years in
the department, and I never did see a body so
completely consumed teeth a little bone. Hey, get on away
from your son, Get along on home with you. Daddy
and Mamma said, Aunt Martha had gone away on a trip.
Tommy might have known pretty well where she had gone
if he had thought about it, but he didn't think
about it. None of his family did. What for Aunt
Martha had to go away, Sure she went all right?
Who missed Aunt Martha anyway. There were lights in all
of the closets in the new house they moved too,
and lots of room for everyone, even baby's sister. Never
no holes, not even mouse holes in any of the closets,
and of don't think about it.