Speaker 1: From Hollywood, The Judy can Over Show brought few weeks
week by the Colgate Palmary Peach Company, makers of Palmilly
Soap and Colgate Tooth Powder, Mammy Soap, Your Beauty, Hope
and Colgate Tooth Powder.
Speaker 2: For a breath of Sweet present The Judy Canova Show
with mel Blank, Ruby Dandres Broon of Felton, Joe Kerns,
The s Workman Opeks and his Orchestra and starring Judy Canova.
Speaker 3: If it ain't build, it's tack. If it ain't waves,
it's whack. If it nin't skirts, it's slack. Gotta beat
this or that. If it I steer, it's doggy. If
it ain't high, it's sooky.
Speaker 4: If it ain't ay, it's fogy. Gotta be this all that?
Speaker 5: Who can it be? If it ain't me?
Speaker 4: I know it's not your brother.
Speaker 5: Can't you see It's gotta.
Speaker 4: Be just one way of the other. Tell me what
I'm must know. If you don't lie, I'll go.
Speaker 3: If it ain't yes, it's no gotta be this a
bad illi say I'm act, I'm really in the mass
man asking for my hands.
Speaker 4: So you just understand this gotta be this a fad,
I ain't gonna see it. And wait even I had
a date.
Speaker 3: In nineteen twenty as the gotta be this a fad?
Speaker 5: Why I'm it?
Speaker 4: One soldier from the side sif he was you kind
of call and lanky handy dad, I reminded him of
lovely native girlsy scene.
Speaker 5: And hey, what is of you?
Speaker 4: Bangy? So just make up your mind because if you don't,
you fine.
Speaker 3: I ain't a past time and you're love of the
common contact with a baseball bat m.
Speaker 4: Tata be.
Speaker 6: Well.
Speaker 2: Judy has decided to augment her vocal talents by becoming
a musician, and as our scene open, she's practicing on
the saxophone.
Speaker 3: Draam audrum, joinium, I'm yes, Judy, come over here.
Speaker 4: Take those air mups off. I'm coming, honey. How can
you hear with those air mufs on? I can't. Hey,
what do you think of my playing? That's my music
sends you?
Speaker 7: Oh?
Speaker 4: Yes, MIT's this said?
Speaker 5: All right?
Speaker 4: But that ain't the way I like to travel. Well,
I learned a new number. Listen to this, okay, godl
and Judy? What number was that song of India by
Ramsky Kars The car M's the Corser car.
Speaker 3: Well it sounded flat, my sur it's flat carsic cop
was driving in on the ramsky.
Speaker 4: Oh hey, this jitty and that's the mouse sting in
that saxophone. Now I'm happy. Hm, that's settled it.
Speaker 3: That's the last time I'll ever play the saxophone.
Speaker 4: While I'm chewing bubblegum. Thank you, Raiam. Did you ever
play a musical instrument? Oh? Yeah, honey, I used to
play the tuba.
Speaker 3: I put everything I had into that tuber. You did, yes,
with my shape, I could jesse about naked.
Speaker 4: Oho, mad Aggie. How'd you like my saxophone solo?
Speaker 7: Well, Judy, I can't say much for your playing. Why
must you always play swing? I'm staed up with popular music.
Speaker 4: Well, shot, said I after I played it ain't popular?
Speaker 7: Of course, I like some modern conductors, such as Paul
Whitemancostilana whom do you like?
Speaker 5: Well?
Speaker 3: I kind of lean toward Harry James, but Betty Gravell
keep pushing me away.
Speaker 4: Ah, but the old masters will live forever yep.
Speaker 3: After all, why would music be today if Wagner didn't
give a wag beet Hoven didn't give a beat, and
damn Rush didn't guty you thought I was gonna cut
and say durn didn't you? Well this I ain't getting
my practicing done.
Speaker 4: Hey, look, my judy. That man next door is opening
his window and waving at you. O man, mister Michael,
did you hear me playing indeed? I did you know Atterson,
Topeka and Santa fe? Yeah? Do you want me to
play it?
Speaker 8: No? I want you to take it.
Speaker 4: Oh, tell him, no mind this duty. He's just old
meaning yeah, I know it.
Speaker 3: He's so many uses, Bob, why for clothes line so
the birds can't sit down?
Speaker 4: Little birds. Feels so sorry for him. Just have a
good fat any time. But to the time on the radio.
Oh gosh, yeah, I nearly forgot my favorite program turning
on drain him.
Speaker 8: The toottl saxophone now uh is on the air.
Speaker 2: Two little saxophones are dandy, built to get your mouth.
Speaker 9: That's newt by morning. Keep it handy when you're going
on that.
Speaker 2: To uh to.
Speaker 9: Hello, everybody, this is hot. Flickstein, you're a saxophone man.
Are you a social outcast?
Speaker 4: You sit home alone? Yeah? Night after night you do,
uh huh.
Speaker 9: Well, then take a saxophone course and be the life
of the party.
Speaker 6: If after six lessons, you don't play the saxophone beautifully,
I'll kiss.
Speaker 4: A pig shots. I've had six lessons. I wonder how
I'm doing.
Speaker 5: Okay, you went.
Speaker 10: Wa wa, Turn.
Speaker 3: That darned thing off, geranium, Just there, Dog's gone. It
seems like every time I turned the radio on, some
jug head stick's tato trap into the microphone and says.
Speaker 9: Pardon me for talking in the face and reading.
Speaker 4: Okay, bro, how do you like the way I play
the saxophone?
Speaker 9: Well, senor readA. I like the way you play it,
but I don't like the way you hold it up
to your mouth. Why, because that is what makes your music.
Speaker 11: Come on, Senorita, do you play Shashtikhovi's Tchaikowski and knock
money and off shosh the coverage Chaikowski and rach money off?
Speaker 4: Now once more? Paid Rod to wash the sofa. You
know it's not messing. Maxel don't like my playing neither.
I asked him what he thought of my execution, and
he said he was in favor of it.
Speaker 9: Send you reader. If I was here, he wouldn't talk
that way. I fought any golden gloves.
Speaker 4: In the golden club. How'd you come out?
Speaker 9: Pete?
Speaker 11: First, I was in the heavyweight division of the Golden Gloves,
But Pedro, you're not heavy enough.
Speaker 9: Senor reading my Golden Gloves had led in him. But
you know I want three fighting in row.
Speaker 11: I fought kid Gonzales, Kid Ramires, Kid Garcia, and then
I lost.
Speaker 9: What happened?
Speaker 11: They stopped giving me kids and made me fight him man.
But the biggest moment of my career was when I
fought Joe Lewis.
Speaker 9: Boy, did I have him? Frighten? You had Joe Royd's
see he thought he killed me. Later send read I
we're going on late start and.
Speaker 4: A hot t do YouTube Pedro.
Speaker 2: That reo the cases clarenadam Is Orchestra playing in Acapulco.
Speaker 6: Use Hall tooth.
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Speaker 5: Don't take the.
Speaker 10: Chimes with your.
Speaker 8: Use cold Gate.
Speaker 4: This Judy has a note from mister Maxwell's man next door.
I see what it says.
Speaker 3: Oh says he's coming over to tighten a part of
my saxophone, so I can't.
Speaker 4: Play so loud. YEA, well, what parts you go to titan?
Speaker 3: This drip around my neck. But I'll show him. I'm
gonna be a great musician. Yeah, honey, maybe someday you
leave and play Carnegan Hole or the metropol.
Speaker 9: Yes, miss d I heard you playing the saxophone and
I've come to sign you up.
Speaker 4: Oh are you from the Metropolitan?
Speaker 9: No, I'm from Prudential.
Speaker 4: Hey, I gotta start my flac GUIDs and again. Oh gee,
that wasn't very good. I better run over it again,
pull it out of the street. Ray Am, I told
you we're gonna have trouble with that.
Speaker 5: Man, and you read it.
Speaker 9: I don't like our neighbor, mister Maxwell.
Speaker 4: Pedro, If you don't like him, why were you playing marbles.
Speaker 10: With his kid?
Speaker 11: Well, we wasn't playing Marbora's. I had a fight with
mister Maxwell and his kids was helping me pick up
my ps.
Speaker 4: Well how did the fight start?
Speaker 9: Mister Maxwell dropped a bunch of leaves on my head. Off.
Speaker 4: Now, Pedro, how could a bunch of leaves hurt you?
Speaker 9: It was he leaves out of his dining room table.
Speaker 3: If mister Maxwell ever saw my boyfriend palm Roy, he
wouldn't bother.
Speaker 4: That's right, Jerran palm Roy is big, isn't he?
Speaker 1: Oh?
Speaker 3: Yes, him, He's the original mister five by five palm
Rod is the only man in the army who has to.
Speaker 4: Fall out in a calm of three. Well that's dobell
or is it Genian? Then? Missus truck the kind of
other party you ever seen? His beauty will show him
in party. Count.
Speaker 9: Oh, I can't you as as as I could.
Speaker 8: My heart sum need to this guise.
Speaker 4: My brain began to.
Speaker 9: Spin, and I flew to you on their wings.
Speaker 4: Y'all go, Count, you better straighten up and fly right
in here.
Speaker 9: I heard about your troubles from your aunt. I gotta
Oh what a stew you are eating?
Speaker 4: What is the trouble with your neighbor? Wow? It started
like this, Count, Why do you think of it? Count?
Speaker 6: It is very good cherry, but I think you have
a little too much for tissimo in your modato.
Speaker 4: Yes, it's just this tight dress I'm wearing. Listener Rescount,
Oh my pretty, oh little digeon?
Speaker 8: Oh shut up?
Speaker 9: That man is a cowardly can I will fight you?
Speaker 4: Might do it? Had a boy, Count, I am a
duel at twenty faces, and you choose the weapons.
Speaker 9: Oh no, I will let him choose the weapons. I
will choose the number of faces.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I can just leave the headlines now. Man in
California fights deer with town in South America.
Speaker 8: That is not true.
Speaker 4: I would gladly face death for you, then go over
and face that man.
Speaker 9: But youerie that man is not dead. She read that
man has insulted you in this. I cannot stand. I
simply cannot stand.
Speaker 4: What are you gonna do?
Speaker 9: I'm going to lie down.
Speaker 4: Listen, Judus, what is it geranium? Or is that mister
mess Well? He's run our vegetable, ruin our vegetable.
Speaker 5: How well?
Speaker 4: He has a clay pigeon that he crossed with a
mud hen and it's laying bricks all over our victory guards. Judy,
I content anymore this.
Speaker 7: We're going to sell this house. I'm going to call
mister Golf, my real estate broker right now.
Speaker 3: Well, I all came with me at Aggie. I'll write
a ad for the newspapers too. Let me see, now,
eighteen room house was.
Speaker 4: Four square bathtubs.
Speaker 7: Judy Well mentioning square bathtubs helped sell the house.
Speaker 4: Why Shaw, that'll appail the people. When you take a
bathroom a square bathtub, you can't.
Speaker 5: Leave a ring.
Speaker 3: Then study if we get a new house. I hope
we don't get one with those modern gadgets. It's fact
a white ran him well for one thing. I don't
like those automatic fire sprinklers that turn on if the
room gets too hot.
Speaker 4: Why not.
Speaker 3: Well, one night my boyfriend Palmero kissed me in the
kitchen and before we knew it, we were swimming in
three feet of water.
Speaker 2: Hey, wait a minute, has anybody seen Judy?
Speaker 8: Yeah, we saw she was in a little jukebox joint.
Speaker 1: He designed the record machine.
Speaker 10: So Judy Canova so mad she was seeing re.
Speaker 8: She'd bang on the counter.
Speaker 10: Jill the owner came over, and this is what Judy said.
Speaker 3: I come here from far up the mountains, sweet burning
music too. He put my nikel in what and just
listen what I got. Gimme back my nicka. We don't
like that stuff of the mountains. Hain't bick Burnald you
money here.
Speaker 4: I've heard beauty but no come from pigs. And then inco.
Speaker 3: Give me back my Nika, rand Pappy warny about your
saidy joys. Skinny back my Nika. Oh my six shooter's
only gonna shoot five time. My three turn to mountains.
Speaker 5: Nor lord Joli, harry.
Speaker 4: Me repine my bye, s peez all out all that day.
HOI give me back my Nika, he co.
Speaker 3: Dingy or carousin a sports But I'll get back my neck.
Speaker 4: To take it to the Supreme court. I must return
to the mountain. I know way no more shall I carry.
Speaker 5: Anyone that likes that.
Speaker 4: That should be sent to out foot tray.
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a more beautiful complexion.
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Speaker 7: Of skin, even women with dry skin, oily skin, rough skin,
women as.
Speaker 12: Old as fixty, even women whose skin wasn't clear.
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Speaker 12: Do this just three times a day for fourteen days
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Speaker 2: Remember, doctors proved this beauty plan with Parmolid soap brought
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Speaker 8: So see what Parmala can do for your own complexion
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Speaker 12: And for tabo shower for loveliness all over, get the
new big Christy birth size Pamela.
Speaker 3: Well, Raggedy, you think the saxophone playing is improved.
Speaker 7: Well, Frankly, Judy, the timber of your vibratos proves your
ambushoor is bad. You haven't enough a legro in your pizicato,
and you don't sustain your crescendo.
Speaker 4: Now what does that mean in plain American? In plain American, Judy,
you ain't got no small.
Speaker 3: You may tell me that I'm a square, Well, let's
say you're a little on the icky size.
Speaker 4: All shock. Now, let's be fair about this thing. And Ragge,
you ain't no Bobby Soycher yourself.
Speaker 7: I may never have swooned it, Frankie Sinatra. That's There
have been times when I felt a little saint.
Speaker 4: Thank you radio. Do you like Frankie Sinatra singing? Oh yes, honey,
mister Sinatra's singing really sends me. Sinatra sends you, Oh yes, ma'am.
He may have to make two drifts, but he sends me.
Speaker 9: Good morning, Good morning, ladies.
Speaker 8: I have wonderful news.
Speaker 4: Oh with mister my real estate broker. Have you sold
a house?
Speaker 8: Why yes, I sold it this morning and tomorrow.
Speaker 4: We go to Escrow Ascrow day.
Speaker 5: That's wall.
Speaker 4: Is that anywhere near Pismo Beach?
Speaker 7: Now swim myself, don't never night, whether you swim or not,
we'll get away from that terrible neighbor.
Speaker 4: Have you lined this up another place?
Speaker 8: Oh, I've not only lined one up, I've bought it
for you.
Speaker 4: Sly mister God back your hope.
Speaker 3: It ain't want no small Hollywood apartment, you do what well?
Them Hollywood apartments is so small when you close the
bedroom door of the door and now get in bed
with you.
Speaker 4: And you know them brass door. And I've was on
a cold night, how hard it is to buy? What
is these chases?
Speaker 10: You said?
Speaker 4: Well, you know what.
Speaker 6: You Yes, there's something mysterious about it. I went to
the Opa, but they referred.
Speaker 4: Me to the FBI. Well what house was that?
Speaker 9: The house on ninety second Street. Don't worry about the house.
Speaker 4: I did buy it for you, I didn't it that
house on Well, Now with sola house, I can flame
a saxophone.
Speaker 3: Oh why, mister Maxwell say, I thought you were a
younger man, But you got white side burns.
Speaker 8: These hard side burns. I've got cotton stuff.
Speaker 3: In my ears might far greater cotton. There's some bow
eavils crawling down your chin. What do you mean busting
in like this?
Speaker 4: Anyhow?
Speaker 8: That's saxophone? Can't you play any other instrument?
Speaker 12: Well?
Speaker 4: I can play the split flip.
Speaker 9: Don't you mean foop?
Speaker 2: No?
Speaker 3: When I play ice pray? Yeah, killo flies. But if
York can't murders the bee, where's why'm.
Speaker 8: Gonna be murdered?
Speaker 1: All right?
Speaker 2: I'm telling you that if you think if I thought
that you, if you think to say, what.
Speaker 8: Am I mad about?
Speaker 6: I forgot when I came over here to tell you,
I just bought this house and I'm gonna throw you off.
Speaker 4: Do you hear that?
Speaker 5: Ad I eat?
Speaker 4: Mister Maxwell bought our house and that mass back again?
Speaker 6: Oh, come in, mister go miss Canova, about that house
I bought for you. I forgot to tell you where
it is. Here's the address, mister Goff, why he sold
me this house? What house did you buy, Miss Canova?
Speaker 4: When we bought your house?
Speaker 8: Hey, no, we're right back where we started. What are
we gonna do about it?
Speaker 4: Well, I don't know what you're gonna do about it,
but I gotta get back. I'm a practice. Oh my man,
that boll. We all have dreams, some of 'em good
and some of 'em bad.
Speaker 5: But there's one dream we all.
Speaker 3: Share with our loved ones and the armed forces who
are still overseas, the dream of the time to come
and we can all be together again.
Speaker 5: I'll buy that dream. Imagine me with my head on
your should and you with your lives getting ball a
god who love moods and us we'd meadow to side
that dream. Imagine me and a girl right and love,
and you thinking that for my dolly, a church love,
Oh and those last minute joy that dream, A honeymoon
and Carrol and a brand new auto gyro and on
my rocket and a.
Speaker 3: Weed we'll settle down in Dallas and a little plastic dalace.
Speaker 5: It's not as crazy as you think. Imagine me on
our birth and a birth tree with one like you
win the nurse dree. It doesn't sound bad.
Speaker 4: And if it can be had.
Speaker 10: A honeymoon carle little brand new lot garble and on
my rocking.
Speaker 6: In a way.
Speaker 10: We'll settle down there, Dallas, in a little plastic power.
Speaker 8: It's not as crazy as it nay.
Speaker 5: Imagine me on a bird and a bird.
Speaker 4: One like you in the Norse. It doesn't sound And
by that.
Speaker 2: This is burn Smith acting you to follow the fourteen
day Palmy plan for a lovelier complexion, and don't take
a chance with your romance. Use Colgate tooth powder night
and morning and before every date. Good news, ladies, more
points for used plats. Yes, you now get four points
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Those extra points will help you buy choice cuts of meat.
Why has Uncle Sam increased the points for cooking fat.
It's because there is an alarming shortage in industrial fats.
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Speaker 8: Ah, here's duty, folks.
Speaker 3: It was off the nice being riddy tonight, and I
hope we'll all be together again next Saturday night.
Speaker 4: In the meantime, please don't.
Speaker 3: Forget the two products that bring us together each week.
I'm Holly's open Holgate tooth.
Speaker 4: Powder, the bestest in the world. This is Judy Canova
from Hollywood, saying.
Speaker 3: Goo Nair, wherever you may.
Speaker 12: By hall.
Speaker 5: Longly.
Speaker 8: The Judy Canomoshaw was written by Bred Fox and Henry Hofo.
This is the national broadcasting coming
Speaker 5: Boom.