Speaker 1: Du Boys on episode number three hundred and seventeen. Oh yeah,
actually he was so over that you even get it
on three seventeen.
Speaker 2: How about just a little bit, just a tad.
Speaker 1: Well, today we're going to be talking about WWF's Saturday
Night main event number four fifteen.
Speaker 2: Eighty six or nineteen eighty five, depending on how you
look at it. Of course, on that show, the big
thing a peace match Colport Kushner a live old golf
but I guess Hall Covid also defends the title against
Terry Funk.
Speaker 1: On that and don't forget mean Gene at the pool.
Speaker 2: And Jesse Ventura is here and he's back. Here he
is again, there he is.
Speaker 1: Before we get into that, we have the Deadlock updates.
Speaker 2: Deadlock updates on the Patreon new watch This is up.
That's in the five dollars and above. Check that out,
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Not only a new Retroscinc. Gentlemen, but Retrosinc. Number one
hundred made it to the episode one hundred and the
episode one hundred. Retrosinc. Is the episode of WWAF for
all from nineteen ninety eight where Stone Cold drives a
zamboni to the ring. Congratulations David, great work, I mean
that's fair. Yeah, man, please go check it out if
you have it, everybody. I mean, I know, Retrocincs are
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One hundred up on the Patreon right now, well said
dp W is back baby October nineteenth. Our big event
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the Grady Cole Center. You do not want to miss
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whatever you'll call it. A lot of history between the
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and just announced the DPW World Championship will be on
the line. In a steel cage match, Adam Priest defends
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A lot of more big announcements for the show here
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All right, now it is time for the Patreon shoutout
segment starting in the five dollars Tier Robbie Maddix the Third,
James Schmitt, bro Dude, Rada brother. It doesn't matter, Jack,
All that matters is you by Jeff Jared Gold or
Kurt Angle will kill him.
Speaker 2: I wish I had bought fucking Global for his gold.
I don't know it would have it would have.
Speaker 3: Been Yeah, there's no way.
Speaker 1: Yeah, like we lived through it in real time. That's
fucked out to think about.
Speaker 2: It's pretty crazy. And how little that was talked about,
Like how many people did we need to know? Actually
who bought it?
Speaker 1: Did anyone out there? By GFW Gold let us know?
David Fraser, Joseph Bahan, Griffin Green, Andrew sc I, Yeah,
Seth you ten dollar tier. Hey, Johnny, my grandma said
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What gives?
Speaker 2: Oh? I was calling the cops on you instead.
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Haiku Tasma. I put the D in her p Now
that's a w Jason Gault. She three on my d
till I get the tables, testify. Yeah, just E hard Wood,
ch Mahogany nice wrestling fan five five five Hello, Patrick Nolan,
Gordon Shumway shitting on Johnny's head while giving him an
avalanche overdrive.
Speaker 2: Who the fuck is that? Fuck you?
Speaker 1: Man U Hano, Yoru rw Jackson Crow Croon SmackDown versus
Raw two thousand and.
Speaker 2: Eight on the PSP, not good on any console.
Speaker 1: Sugar Sean G ninety seven, Jose de Grassia, Jacob Team Janner,
No thanks, dude, no shower for me, brother. I'm so
nasty and smelly alright, Kenneth Clyburn, Jeremy Aubain, Big Mike
Perk doggo type shit. Call me a nasty boy the
way I be sending my jeorts to shitty city. After all,
you can eat cabbage and boiled egg Dinnart fucking freak
stoned cold Steve Austin taking a fat boond rip while
getting hit by a car. Johnny, you can't hide from
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Speaker 4: Squid Ward tennis balls towards tennis balls, tennis balls Yeah,
j P Tuesday, Yeah, Speaker, Slan Cotta, Juggie JUNI go
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What the hell that's my big homie Chase. See this's
Son who did?
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Got a new name for the pop. I want to
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Share it Kurt Jones one hundred and twenty dollars annual. Jesus, Christ, Jesus.
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Speaker 1: All right, let's get into WWF Saturday Nights Main Event
number four.
Speaker 2: What was then? Obsession?
Speaker 6: Obsession?
Speaker 3: It is my obsession?
Speaker 2: No real song here for Saturday Night's minute, but yes,
episode four, and what an episode it is. There's so
much on this, including a WBF title match between Hawk
Hogan and Terry funk I oh believe it, and of course,
more importantly Tony a peace match the main event a
peace match with Nikolai Volkov and Corporal Kurshner, because I
guess I was just like a hot button topic at
the time.
Speaker 6: Yes, peace, that's always a hot button.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: But before we get into that show, let's talk about
the world wrestling at the time. With the Wrestling Observer
newsletter from the Observer of December thirtieth, nineteen eighty five.
The big news is that Bruiser Brody was fired by
Now Japan for missing shows due to a fight over money.
Brewiser Bradie was promised somewhere around fourteen thousand dollars a
week and Annoki renagged on that deal due to houses
being down pretty severely. Also, Anoki is in no mood
to put up with Brody's ultimatums with the UWF Gang
coming back to boost his business. Fourteen grand a week
is pretty good. I mean he was a top act, right,
so I guess.
Speaker 1: He was, and they were drawing big money for sure.
Speaker 2: Well, Anochi disagrees. Paul Cogan made his first ever appearance
in Charlotte, North Carolina, and the show was kind of
a flop, only drawing two thousand. Oh that's what a
shitty show. And apparently the crowd were chanting fake, fake,
fake during Hogan versus Bundy's main event mat.
Speaker 1: Wow, what this.
Speaker 6: Flair country out there?
Speaker 7: Man?
Speaker 2: You know that's right, Toddy. There was only real wrestling
going on Charlotte Hogan.
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's a NBA territory.
Speaker 2: I don't know if I've ever seen that fans channing
faked King Kong Bundy.
Speaker 3: They're chanting figure him.
Speaker 2: They didn't believe that he was a real guy from
New Jersey. L JAN wrestling dolls, his action figures. I
don't know why the fuck he put dolls here. His
bullshit are selling so strongly that the company expects a
shortage of Roddy Piper for Christmas. In fact, they've sold
more than three million units this year alone, three fucking
million dollars of LGM figures. It's not like you know,
I mean, figures were obviously popular, but wrestling ones were
just new.
Speaker 1: You got one of those.
Speaker 2: See, So I was not an LJAM guy. I was
like kinda before my time. But I I they're like
big fucking like dog toys.
Speaker 6: They are there, just one solid piece of plastic, right
or whatever, I might.
Speaker 1: Get you the Roddy Piper one.
Speaker 2: You can't. There's a shortage of them for Christmas. You're
not listening.
Speaker 1: Oh I can get one. Oh yeah, you obviously haven't
seen the late eighties early nineties th retail nightmare movies
where they end up getting the last one.
Speaker 2: I watched Jingle all the way.
Speaker 6: Buddy, he's gonna get you like the Spanish one, and
it's gonna be all wrong.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 1: I have an idea. I would get you one. I
would shine it up real nice.
Speaker 2: No, no, don't be nice.
Speaker 3: You actually sign it up real nice.
Speaker 1: So you had a big polish Oh yeah. Then I
would turn that thing side yeah and put under your tree.
You have a good Christmas.
Speaker 2: Oh that's fucking nice, because whatever I mean.
Speaker 1: Then I would pick it up and stick it straight up.
Without a shadow of a doubt it would go up
your ass. That thing's huge directly.
Speaker 2: Last couple things here from the observe of February seventeenth,
nineteen eighty six. I had to jump ahead a bit
because there's none for January eighty six.
Speaker 1: Oh wow, okay.
Speaker 2: Bruiser Brodie's lifetime suspension from the AWA in fact lasted
about three months. He was fired from Japan and then
he was also lifetime suspended from the awa Verne Gangie
now wants him back again to work with the aging
Jerry Blackwell.
Speaker 1: That is gimmick.
Speaker 2: Wow, I didn't consider that. That's everyone. It was just
a little older. I guess that's everybody though. I mean
every episode, every week we do, we're just a little older.
Speaker 6: Why you gotta say that that makes you feel.
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, especially to Meltzer says apparently Steve Borden of
the Blade Runners is out with the shoulder injury, although
both both and.
Speaker 1: Who's the other guy in the well?
Speaker 2: Meltzer does say here James, although both he and Terrible
partner Jim Hellwig were duded fired anyway, he was just
a Dave. Dave marvels that these two stiffs have made
every issue of The Observer since they debuted, So he
was not a fan of one. Steve Borden, Steve and
Jim Hellwig terrible partner.
Speaker 1: I wonder what he thinks about Jim Hellwig in nineteen
ninety six.
Speaker 2: I mean, this can't be much better, terrible person.
Speaker 1: He should face the chucky doll on WCW Wow.
Speaker 3: I just thought about that.
Speaker 1: That would have chased the business forever.
Speaker 2: Wow, dude, fucking they give Warriors promo in the back
and on it it says fucking bears. Last thing here, Crockett.
I thought you'd like this. Jam Crockett has ordered a
new NWA World title belt, apparently worth twenty eight thousand dollars.
Speaker 1: Nice.
Speaker 2: Now, I don't know if that's how much he paid
for it, or that's just how much he told people
that he could sell them to do him for.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Really, twenty eight thousand dollars, by the way, in nineteenv
six is equivalent to eighty two thousand dollars today.
Speaker 1: Wow.
Speaker 6: That's why they had to put up a lot of
money for the belt, right then they have to put
up a oh like belt.
Speaker 2: Right, yeah, something like that. Yeah, I mean yeah, I
mean you're breaking you buy it right, motherfucker. No shoes,
no shirt, no service.
Speaker 1: It also helped, I think, with the credibility of the belt,
because I think the fans knew that too. I think
the fans there were a deposit right on the belt too,
so it made it seem like, oh shit, he's carrying
around like a fifty thousand dollars belt.
Speaker 2: I mean that's a pretty cool concept though, and I
would have bought. Oh shit, that's expensive as fun, like
we don't break It.
Speaker 1: Was cool too because he actually made him do it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was that switch. What a Garney.
Speaker 6: You hear about that as like Flair when he took
the belt and then they didn't get his money back
or whatever.
Speaker 2: Right, Okay, I was just about to say, Tony, there's
a good chance a lot of people didn't get their
money back. Well, that is it for the Observer. Now
let's talk about WF SATA Knight's main event January fourth,
nineteen eighty six, which was taped December nineteenth, nineteen eighty five.
Speaker 1: All right, so we start here with Saturday Night's main event,
Shining in Florida, m Little.
Speaker 2: Florida Show here, and Hogan is outside with Mean Jean,
and he has a blender, vitamins, a banana.
Speaker 1: Yeah it pans in and Hogan his pullside with a
big blender. The bananas they're huge, the eggs, eggs slentyful.
And he has a whole slew of organ defender horse bills.
You know something, You gotta protect your organs when you're
drinking this much gasoline. Dude.
Speaker 2: Oh man, I think I really got it together. Now, brother,
and he's fucking putting bananas and eggs in this blender.
I got the eggs, the calcium, the carbohydrates, food, all
the vitamins I need and mean Jean walks up and says, huwk,
what are you doing?
Speaker 1: Mean Jane walks up in a tuxedo with no pants.
Speaker 2: What the fuck are you're talking about me? What do
you mean? Don't you see? I got my fucking blunder going, Dude.
Speaker 1: I'm making straight gasolin over your brother.
Speaker 2: I'm getting ready for that low life no good rattlesnake
Terry funk Man, and he pours a drink into a
cup and then me. Jane says, this is how you
prepare for a tuttle defense. When the fuck have you
ever defended? I don't mean gene.
Speaker 1: Don't you make hamburgers?
Speaker 2: Dude?
Speaker 1: What are you talking to me about? Title defenses? Brother?
Speaker 2: You know the fucking sun's reflecting off that chrome dome
is gonna blind me before my imagine.
Speaker 1: The fuck are you wearing?
Speaker 2: Dude?
Speaker 1: You look ridiculous.
Speaker 2: Brother, Ogan says, this is my high test gasoline. This
is Dolsers patented Python protein drink. And told you Derek
give Terry Funk the recipe. Thankfully, Terry Funk won't watch
the show and see your table of eggs, banana bors
pillsis gasoline. This ship will get you right, mean gene,
fuck shit, why do you keep doing that?
Speaker 1: Well, I guess I'll throw it in there too, balls
all right back to you guys.
Speaker 2: Well, well, now the hillbillies are in the pool and
they're floating, and they're big donuts, and Rotty Piper's watching
them through binoculars like they're sea animals. They're fully clothed, then,
I mean, and they're fucking suspenders guaranteed smell like shit
fucked the whole wave full up. Viper's looking up through binoculars.
Biper says, well, I'll look at that moby dick with
defeet and Jesse Vatu is there on his stomach, butt
ass naked getting rubbed down by the ladies, and Jesse says,
once that hot rod, and then Biper says, oh, that
my fat hillbilly's right there, and Jesse says, oh, I
thought I smelled bacon frying, and Biper says, there's only
one thing to worry about, and that's after night. Humphree,
A humpback a whale's got to be out of our job.
Poor hillbillies, they're just trying to make a living and
they're getting just fucking shamed here by Roddy Piper.
Speaker 3: You're at the pool getting shame.
Speaker 2: He should be drinking that protein drink.
Speaker 1: I'd love to see I would love to see cousin
Luke off the Oregon defend a horse ce Cas shake.
Speaker 2: Uncle Elfrend needs a hit or two of that gas
so lean.
Speaker 1: I do love Indy. Saturday Night's main event intros that
uh Macha man is doing a double axe handle from
the top rope to the concrete floor.
Speaker 2: Also George Steel eating the damn turn buckle, gets the
stuff and everywhere, like, you don't know how they had
the budget for this.
Speaker 1: Did they ever spike a turn buckle?
Speaker 2: That is unbelievable. You have a sick ye.
Speaker 6: I'm playing that through my head like rat poison, sleeping
pill starts foaming at the mouth.
Speaker 2: Give them boner pills, right viagro in there guys.
Speaker 3: With the green tongue hanging out of his head. Boner.
Speaker 1: It just activates a boner instantly. I've never taken super filmula.
Speaker 6: You know that holding injects in the turn vocal.
Speaker 2: Don't give them my recipe.
Speaker 1: Drugs were so much more potent in the eighties.
Speaker 2: They just go right through.
Speaker 1: Well. Vince McMahon welcomes us to the Sundome in Tampa, Florida.
Speaker 2: Yes, beautiful Florida and uh, tonight we'll have more fun
in the sun. But for now, let's talk about wrestling.
I guess we're gonna have a match that's a direct
result of the recent Geneva summit. Core Boo Kershner will
face against Nikolai Volkoff in the peace match. They don't
explain what that is, and in fact, I never really
know what it was.
Speaker 1: They never did.
Speaker 3: Don't know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean I kind of get they were going for,
but there's no like, there's no real rules.
Speaker 1: No, it works out the kind of.
Speaker 2: Junk yard Dog teams up with Ricky Steamboat to score
off against mister Fuji and the Magnificent Morocco. This is
only one of the challenges Jyd will have to face tonight.
And I was like, oh, Jyd will have to face,
of course, a fifty five foot high water slide when
he takes on Jimmy Hart in a water slide competition.
Speaker 1: Dude, the way.
Speaker 6: They said this was a fifty full waterside competition with
Mouths of the South.
Speaker 1: I was like, what are you talking about.
Speaker 2: That's the name of the slide. And yes, the Animal's
back with us. Georgie the Animal, Steel hot Off the
Boner will square off against the macho Man. And everyone's
waiting for the participants of the man in my WF
champion Hulk Cogan meaning number one contender Terry Funk and
one on the match are almost forgotten. Jesse Ventura comes in.
It says, wait a minute, McMahon, I'll tell you about
the others.
Speaker 1: One more match and Jesse Ventura no clips. Hey, how
you doing.
Speaker 2: I knew you were gonna say some bullshit.
Speaker 1: Dude. Ventura here, by the way, we saw him earlier
when he was getting wiped down by the ladies. But
he walks in here with the cape on too and
the glasses and everything. He looks fantastic. I mean, he
is in great shape here. Also, Ventura's hair and facial
hair is like if someone drew Hologan from memory. Now,
fuck you, James, that was mine first. Just so you know,
that was superstar Billy Graham's look. I was paying homage.
Speaker 2: So Jesse talks about how the Hillbilly Hicks team up
against Jesse on the last Sire Night's main event, which
is of course Hilly Jim, Uncle Elmer and cousin Mudpie.
He says, which is very disrespectful to cousin Luke.
Speaker 1: Until the match, I thought his name was cousin Mudpie.
Speaker 2: Okay, I had no clue this guy was.
Speaker 1: I totally. I feel like we saw this guy before,
but I just forgot who was this wedding episode. Yeah,
so I was like, oh, yeah, Cousin Mudpie is there?
Speaker 6: That makes sense, Yeah, totally, he's Hillbilly likes.
Speaker 2: Why the fuck would he not because in mud this
guy's uncle Elmer.
Speaker 1: F Jesse Ventura walked in with the glasses on the hat,
the crazy hair beard combo and cape. Yeah, I guess
that's Cousin Mudpie too.
Speaker 2: Listen to this guy.
Speaker 6: You can tell me it's cousin Doug.
Speaker 3: Should I believe?
Speaker 2: Yes, That's when I saw him wrestle Tony. That's when
I was writing there. So, Jesse says, you don't understand
the significance of this. McMahon. I'm the first announcer in
history to step in the ring and back up what
I say. You ever see Brent muss Berger put on
apparently and go notice the nose and toes the toes
with refrigerator Perry the refrigerators when you get that Musburger
right up, you think you'd ever see Vince Scully standing
there looking down the pipe and take a high, hard
one under the nose McMahon from Dwight Good in no way.
The body's the only want to get back up his words.
So Vince says he's looking forward to seeing him in
the ring for a different reason. That's because he won't
have to hear him on commentary being lopsided. And Jesse says,
wait a minute, fucking McMahon. If you think I'm stepping
in the ring and allowing you to sit here and
talking to yourself, you're mistaken. I went out and got
the only man with brains enough to replace the body.
That's Bobby the brain. Heenen and fucking heman's here, and
Heenan says it's a pleasure to be here, and he
hopes he can live up to the high excellence of
broadcasting that mister Ventura has brought here. And we send
it to mean Geen Oakerland, who is standing by in
the aisle with Roddy Piper and Bob Orton, who shockingly
has a cast on his arm, always for.
Speaker 3: Twenty million years already had.
Speaker 6: A cast done.
Speaker 2: So me and Jean's here with Piper and Bob Barton.
And Jean asked Piper of the match, and Piper says, oh, whoope,
what am I supposed to say? And Jean says, well,
it's a vendetta And Piper says, vendetta speak English, Chef,
you're talking about people. Their idea of a good time
is eating the feet of pigs. Then they go out
there and play with each other. They play the banjo,
and I am I'm saving America. How would you like
Uncle Almer for your uncle? And this ain't a refrigerator? Men,
you're looking at your in the deep freeze. It wasn't
me that jumped one on one against Jesse Ventura or
two on two, or did any of that. These jerks
are the ones that asked for it. Those pieces are garbage.
He's just fucking really giving a time.
Speaker 1: I loved how Jesse Ventura walked into the framing.
Speaker 2: We clipped again.
Speaker 1: He does this all night. He always just comes right
into frame. Hey how they're going, Hey, Ronnie.
Speaker 2: Let me say something else. So he tells them, don't
let this cube ball bother you. When he pats mean
Gene on the head and says, the Hillbilliers are going down.
There's gonna be bad news in a dream after tonight,
and Mean Gene looks at the camera and says, I
give up back to you, mcmahony.
Speaker 1: Piper does pig noises into the mic as it pans away.
Speaker 2: So, by the way, this is all stemming from the wedding,
and we actually watched the episode. We watched the wedding
episode where this all started and Piper interrupted it and
Jesse Ventura had a lot of not so nice things
to say about the bride and groom for that wedding.
So if you if you missed that one, another great episode. Uh,
Satura Night's main event, So check that out that we did.
But yes, Mean Jean standing with the Hillbillies. I'm guessing
that's their name, right, yeahs a trio of.
Speaker 1: The hill I was pretty blown away here by uh
this whole thing, to be honest, like this whole promo.
Speaker 2: I what they said was not what I thought I
was like, Wow, this is like a great promo. So
Mean Jean says, all right, your opponents are in the ring,
and there's bad thoughts, no doubt about it. I'd like
to have your thoughts, and he'll believe Jim, just normal guy,
says mean Jean. We're professional athletes and we're gonna behave
like professional athletes, and no matter what those three cold
cuts up there do, our family honor is on the
line here and we're gonna do what we gotta do
to win the match. And I was like, whoa, there's
no like Shenanigans.
Speaker 1: Okay, head right, So my thought was these guys are
gonna go nuts, right, Like, these guys are gonna have
an absolutely insane promo here, but they just they just
happen to be Hillbillies. And also they're signed to, you know,
the biggest fucking company of their profession. So yeah, dude,
we are like trained for this a lot. My cousin
Luke over here does dropdowns in our barn a lot.
Speaker 2: He's are shipping the bill the BIG's weekly and work
at spots. He's prepared.
Speaker 1: I love that.
Speaker 7: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Yeah, anyways, commits the jiggling. Yeah, they come out and
they do the little dance and they come in and stuff.
But yeah, it's all business like in the ring and uh, I.
Speaker 2: Mean what this is again? And we'll talk about this,
you know, throughout the night. But like especially this tag
way different format than tags nowadays. This was all heat,
all tags.
Speaker 1: Yes, very much, taking advantage of the fact of having
three people on each team, right, I think, yeah, I
think that that's pretty cool. Like the way this was
laid out. I actually enjoyed a lot of this. So
we have Roddy Piper, Jesse vent turning cowboy Bob Warton
taking on Uncle Elmer. He'll Billy Jim, and Cousin.
Speaker 2: Luke not mud Pie.
Speaker 1: Shockingly, yeah, his name is cousin Luke. How about that.
So Ventura starts off here. He looks awesome, dude, he
is in great shape.
Speaker 2: Thank you.
Speaker 1: I do look good.
Speaker 2: He clips into the pod.
Speaker 6: Just walks off care thank you.
Speaker 1: So Uncle Elmer and Jesse Ventura start things off. They
circle each other here in the ring. Ventura tells the
ref to check Elmer after Elmer spit on his fist
and the ref walks over to him and Elmer loses
focus for a second and Jesse Ventura rushes him and
rakes his face immediately. I love that. That was fucking awesome.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 7: Uh.
Speaker 1: They get to the corner, but Elmer is too big.
He explodes out and punches Ventura down. He double goozles him.
He hits a ten thirty one.
Speaker 2: Oh my god. I was like, wow, this is uh,
this is pretty early for I mean, I understand, you know,
the double lift wasn't new, but he'd throwing him down
was awesome.
Speaker 1: Elmer throws Ventura into Jim's boot and Ventura loopy sells,
holding his hand out looking for the tag.
Speaker 2: He's stooging.
Speaker 1: Fantastic stuff here. Yeah. Yeah. Jim locks in a headlock,
but Ventura goes low to the mid section of tags in.
Roddy Piper. Cousin Luke tags in. Yeah, and Roddy Piper
holds out the hand for a handshake, and everyone's like,
don't take that.
Speaker 2: Come on his head. He's considering it.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 2: The cousin Lukey might not be all there, but he's
got a plan.
Speaker 1: Well, Luke takes the handshake, but he's the one to
kick Piper. That was awesome, Yeah, it was. Piper starts
going on a frenzy. He backs Luke to the corner,
tags in Bob Orton. Bob Orton comes in, starts attacking Luke,
and Vince minches on commentary that the cast is not fair.
Speaker 2: He says Orton's arm is the slowest healing injury in
the history of the dude. I loved it.
Speaker 1: I thought that was great Bobby Heen, and I love
the way that he talked about this. He said that, uh,
the cast thing is an injury. He has a doctor,
he has a letter. Wait, Tammick Man, so Roddy Piper
spits on Hillbilly Jim and uh pulls Luke to the corner.
Luke gets up on Bob Orton here, and Orton scrambles
to tag in Ventura. Piper slaps Luke a few times
and pokes him in the eyes, just straight up pokes
him straight in the eyes.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like he's slapping his face around, just blatant. I poke,
and then tags out to Orton. I mean, they're running
a train on cousin Luke, here.
Speaker 1: Did they are? Orton comes in with an elbow off
the top. Piper comes back in. They're doing rapid tags here,
just beating the shit out of this dude. Yeah, just
keeping control. Piper comes in and Luke is able to
walk him to his corner. Luke tags Hill Billy Jim,
I believe, and uh, the ref didn't see the tag.
Speaker 2: He was fucking distracted by that goddamn Jesse Ventura trying
to get into the rig. And I was like, I
bit on, I said, no, I see him gym in there,
you bitch.
Speaker 1: That's the classics man that works every time.
Speaker 2: Dude, Okay, it does work every time for real, And
like what a The way they shot it too was
actually pretty great because like you don't really see the
results round until right you see it, like the referee
at the very end admonishing Jesse and then running over.
It's like, oh you fuck.
Speaker 1: Luke finally gets the tag to Uncle Elmer and him
and Piper start fucking a strike exchange.
Speaker 2: They're a legit hockey fund in the ring, like going crazy,
throwing bombs. Elmer is giving him big punch. Yeah, what
the hill.
Speaker 1: I could not believe. I did not have on my
mind tonight, tuning in that I would see a Roddy
Piper and Uncle Elmer striking sting.
Speaker 2: The crowd was hot for it.
Speaker 1: They were super hot for it. Elmer gets Piper into
a bear hug, but Piper rakes the eyes. Fucking with
the eyes, dude, everyone's in Now everyone's fighting the hill
Billy shit. Can everyone they stand tall? Piper goes to
the outside with his teammates, calls for a time out,
and we go to.
Speaker 2: Commercial little rallying of the troops. I meant, I mean
the crowd loves this shit, Piper and Jesse. I mean
that the whole heel team has like such great heat that,
like anything that the Hillbillies do is is money.
Speaker 1: Roddy Piper headbutts. He'll billy Jim a few times till
he'll billy Jim. No sells it, and then headbuts Piper
and he starts working over a wrist lot.
Speaker 2: Which I thought was fantastic. I mean the headbuts. I thought, oh,
he's just gonna kick hiss and then he's like, ah hold.
Speaker 1: And he's selling it like he is. Like Roddy Piper
is in danger here, like that wrisk lock. He can't
get out of it. Yeah. Piper pushes Jim to the
corner and they start triple team in his ass. Cousin
Luke comes in and he's throwing fucking polish hammers. Crazy.
Speaker 2: He bumps all the heels off the apron hees fucking
go to down Cousin Luke's offense. I'd like to talk
about for a second year because most of his strikes
are all double axe handles polish hammers. Dude, okay, he's
swinging them crazy. I said, Wow, this is a lost move.
That was his thing.
Speaker 1: No one else in the match is doing polish hammers.
It was Cousin Luke's thing for this match.
Speaker 2: It's only until Grizzly Redwood debuts that.
Speaker 1: Roddy Piper gets behind Luke and locks in the sleeper hole.
Orton and Ventura come in and start fighting with Jim
and Elmer. Cousin Luke gets Piper off of him. He
goes to hit the ropes bob Orton. It hits him
in the back of the head of the cast.
Speaker 2: No, dude, his funny as shit. So yeah, he hits
the ropes. Bob Orton hits him in the back of
the head with the fucking cast. Before, during, and after this,
they keep cutting the shots of Uncle Elmer repeatedly big
splashing Jesse Ventura in the corner. He like he won't
stop because he's keeping him at bay. But it's just
the fucking funniest shit shot. It looks like it's like
they just kept replaying the same thing, but no, he
has them held in the corner. Cousin Luke is fucking
dead to rights now and Piper puts him back in
the sleeper and the ref checks him and he's out.
Speaker 1: What a match. I couldn't believe how good that was.
Speaker 3: I was like, wow, this is great.
Speaker 2: Yeah, like everything worked here.
Speaker 6: It was actually, dude, the crowd loved Uncle Elmer, like
the because that wedding just happened, and everyone's.
Speaker 1: Like, we love this.
Speaker 2: He like super sympathetic.
Speaker 3: Now yeah, yeah, they were.
Speaker 1: Super hot for Uncle Elmer and Cousin Luke's Polish hammers.
Speaker 2: Which definitely I've come to few.
Speaker 1: So Vince is here with Bobby Heenan.
Speaker 2: Now he's here with Bobby Heenan until Jesse Vento just
thought i'd pop back in. Hey McMahan, what the fuck
is that? Oh hey, Jesse, he says, thank you, Bobby Heenen.
It was my pleasure. I thought I was just outstanding
in the ring, and I know you were no less
perfect on the microphone and Vince's well, is there any
future for you too, maybe in a tag team combination
or something like that. Then Jesse says, I'll tell you what,
mcmahonon you should look out for. Bobby Heenon probably did
so well. You might be on the unemployment line. Would
you like that not having a job? McMahon so mean,
Jean says, we have a waterslide competition. But a little
background first, on our last stied nine man event, we
alsow the Junkyard Dog deep pants and brand Jimmy Hart,
which is just a thing that was happening at the time.
You just were branding dudes because of Terry Funk. That's
what he did. He branded his ass. So mean Jean says, well,
Jimmy wants revenge and since there these men cannot fairly
in the ring, Heart has challenged Jyd to this contest,
and what do you look to prove? Jimmy and they
do a wide shot here in Jimmy Hart and the
Junkyard Dog are both sitting at the top of a
slide competition. Just ridiculous.
Speaker 6: Let's see how I got the sunglasses on for some reason.
Speaker 2: Still, and Jimmy says, this doesn't matter. Prior for me
the Junkyard Dog and National TV humiliated me. And now Daddy,
I can't I wrestle Junkyard Dog. Was what contest could
beat him in, which is, of course he is a
professional at slides, and Jyd agreed to this.
Speaker 6: I didn't know what the contest, like are you better
at watersline?
Speaker 2: Or like who can slide faster? Daddy? And he said
he's gonna prove to everybody he's a better man than
the Junkyard Dog, and means Gene looks at him and
stops and says, well, I don't know about that, but
I do know the Junkyard Dog. You have one requirement.
And the Junkyard Dog says that for him to agree
to this, that Jimmy Hard had to wear his cute
little undies that he branded him in the Red Ones, right,
so I'm assuming he did. And then he agreed to this,
and it's it's time to go, so mean Jeane says,
let's get it go and let's open up the flood gates.
So the gates open, and I mean Jyd flies down
this fucking water slide. He's got good form, unbelievable for him,
He's goddamn an expert. Jimmy Hart is flipping and flopping
all around the top, can't get any momentum, and he
gets down to the bottom, and then Jesse vent Toura's
voice no clips into the scene and Jesus, wait a minute, McMahon,
something happened there. Jimmy got a flow start immediately. Junkyard's
got an advantagey he's he's used to being on his back,
which I thought.
Speaker 1: Was fun nineteen eighty five, like Insiders as funny as fun.
Speaker 2: Something was not kosher up there. I think Jimmy Hart
got a roll you. I'm gonna go find out. So
Jesse Ventura is now no clip into the scene. He's
here now, and he's here with Terry Funk, who's also here.
I don't know where the fuck there where Funk came from.
So Jesse says, I think Jimmy Hart had a friction
problem wearing this shoe here and he's got a shoe
it's very looks like a child's shoes. And whoever was
running the gate up there gave the Junkyard dog a
two second head start. And Jesse looks over at Terry
Funk and says, well, Terry, what are you doing here.
Speaker 1: I mean that was so natural.
Speaker 2: And Funk says, after I beat the heavyweight champion Hull Cogan,
all the national press will be taking my picture and
I want a great tan for the cover of Sports Illustrated.
And Jesse says, I don't know if they're here, Terry,
why that matter me.
Speaker 7: They put that overrated blonde blow hard hugging on the cover,
they put it, put me on the cover, or I'll
fry them both, both of them. I'll fry them on
my iron. And that's a promise. Do you understand, Ventura?
And Jesse says, well, Sports Illustrator, you've been warned. And
if you don't believe me, take a look at this
report from Gorilla Monsoon. So we go to the w
F special report, which was from Denver, Colorado. Uh I
guess this was, you know, maybe a couple months.
Speaker 1: It was winter nineteen eighty five, Okay, Denver winter.
Speaker 6: It does say that winter nineteen eighty five.
Speaker 2: The Hulks are against terrible Terry Funk. Grilla Monsoon says,
got things going pretty good his way, but the mouth
of the South, distract of the champion, and that branding
iron got dropped into the ring and Hogan got it
right between the eyes, which is pretty fucking crazy. Just
branding iron him in the face, and then Terry Funk
brands Hogan's chest. He doesn't show up with any brand
on his chest this week, so it must have must
have done a shitty job.
Speaker 1: You should have done it a bunch of times in
a row, like uh bam, Margie era dick farm.
Speaker 6: That be crazy, Terry fuck'ing own a dick branding iron.
Speaker 2: Horses.
Speaker 1: Well, we get the Hulk Hogan town hall and he's
with me and Jean.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Jean says, well, Hulk, we all saw what Terry
Funk uh perpetuated on you and any special plans for revenge,
and Hogan says, yeah, that sure is me gene. I'm
gonna fucking kill him.
Speaker 1: I got a dick iron gene. You know.
Speaker 2: Terry Funk busted me up with that braining iron. He
put a bunch of dicks on me.
Speaker 1: It was a dick farm, brother, I got like.
Speaker 2: A dick farm on me. Dude. He mallyed me and
all of Denver in the winter and her double cross.
But just to make sure that doesn't happen night, I
got a special surprise for you, and then he starts
snorting like a pig, much like Roddy Piper did earlier.
And I said, oh, he's got the fucking Hillbillies, but
no judge your dog along.
Speaker 1: Yeah I thought that. I thought they were supposed to
be like dog related noises.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, I got the dogs rabbit dog, so it
should have been what it was was not.
Speaker 3: He's done it before.
Speaker 6: Well, he was doing it in the the old Bard movies.
Speaker 1: Backstage stage.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 6: Sure, maybe he learned after twenty years.
Speaker 2: They probably ripped him crazy about this and he spent
the next twenty years being upset about and trying to
get better as his dog impressions.
Speaker 6: He doesn't make dog noises, so he had.
Speaker 2: Jump your dog walks in, and Hogan says, junk Joug
Dog's gonna be in my corner to make sure nothing
like that happens, all right, j Y D and me,
And Jean says junk Joe dog, And Jyd says, I
got a lot of plans for these boys. Haul Cookan's
gonna do his thing, and I'm a I'm a c
an I dog and I see real well, which is
cold as fuck fasted dog. Thankfully, there's a good dog
on the show this week. So me and Jean says,
bet you're gonna keep an eye on Jimmy Mouth of
the South Heart and Jyd says, I'm gonna keep an
eye on Jimmy real close. I'm gonna be closer to
Jimmy than his bvds. What does that mean?
Speaker 1: I thought he said DVDs. Jimmy Hart really loves physical
media WS library.
Speaker 2: Oh it's a type of boxers. Oh yeah, he's going
to be closer than him than his boxers that he
took off last week. Well, Hogan says, every dog needs
a bonet you on, and Terry Funk is mine brother,
and I could a bunch of bones on my jo
and George Steeles could have well, as long as somebody
doesn't spike the turn funckle.
Speaker 1: With Glorox.
Speaker 2: Clora just an idea, like to make him real clean.
Speaker 1: I think that's what happens.
Speaker 3: Or Clorus is good.
Speaker 1: That's dogs, right, That's what I was thinking. Yeah, I
get that. So we have hul Cogan versus Terry Funk
for the heavyweight title, not.
Speaker 2: The main event, not the most important match on the show.
Speaker 3: Oh, it's the most important for sure.
Speaker 2: Well I disagree McMahon.
Speaker 1: Well, Hulk Hogan makes his entrance and Terry Funk and
Jimmy Hart are already in the ring. Hogan is in
blue and red attire here. Yeah, I like it, Jesse
Ventura says. Terry Funk refers to himself as middle aged
and crazy. This is nineteen eighty five.
Speaker 2: Holy fuck? How old is he here?
Speaker 1: Dude?
Speaker 6: He was like forty one or something right, like early
forties or something. Really, yeah, he was forty one and
nineteen eighty five middle aged and crazy.
Speaker 2: I guess that is fucking right. He's been middle aged
my whole life, before my life.
Speaker 1: So hok, Hogan and Terry Funk lock up, but Hogan
whips Funk around it hits a line in the corner
which sends him to the outside.
Speaker 2: Big pop. I mean the crowd is molten for this
whole match, by the way.
Speaker 1: Yeah, absolutely, there's a lot of heat on it. Pretty
crazy sequence here, Hogan does a drop down, Funk gets
tripped up and stumbles into the ropes. I mean, who
could expect a Hulk Hogan drop down? And then Hogan
lines them out of the ring.
Speaker 2: And fucking Vince's mic makes him turn into a robot
and he says.
Speaker 3: Oh no.
Speaker 1: So in return, Terry Funk tries to do his own
drop down, but Hogan just continually runs the ropes and
steps on him till he powders.
Speaker 2: I could like, this is a Hogan I'm not used to. Uh,
he's like super doing shit. Like the dropdown already blew
me away. Not that I didn't think he could do
a drop down, but the whole sequence and then yeah,
the like four times running back and forth over his
body was funny as shit.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that was awesome because he's trying to roll out
of the way but Hogan keeps stepping on him and
he can finally get out of Yeah.
Speaker 2: Funk is to grab the rope to drag himself and
falls over the timekeeper's table. The crowd is, I mean,
the the hard game is shaking from into it. The
crowd is.
Speaker 1: Terry Funk throws a chair into the ring. He's so
pissed off. Hogan then grabs it, sits at it, and
tells him to just bring it pitch.
Speaker 3: Oh that was incredible. That was awesome.
Speaker 1: Terry Funk backs Hogan down to the corner and chops him.
Hogan immediately turns him around and sends him to the
other corner, and Terry Mule kicks Hogan and Earl does
a little spin to not see it. I thought that
was funny. Well, Terry Funk goes to the top rope,
but Hogan gets to his knees and shakes the top
rope till he falls and crosses himself.
Speaker 2: Which is awesome because he just got low blowed. So
Little Vincy says, oh, poetic justice, fuck you.
Speaker 1: Hogan hits an atomic drop and an axe bomber and
then hits an elbow drop combo.
Speaker 2: I mean, he's fucking let it lose. He does the
handclap thing and I was like, oh, that's for the
leg drop, but I guess that wasn't the iggy for
the leg drop yet.
Speaker 1: Well, Jimmy Hart pulls his foot, Hogan goes out to
stalk him. Junkyard Dog then comes over and Jimmy Hart
tries to crawl under the ring, and.
Speaker 2: Then we get a camera shot under the ring of
Jimmy Hart baking off.
Speaker 6: Dude, it was really jarring because he was the opposite
side of the ring with Jimmy Hart.
Speaker 3: Don't know. It was weird, like they went not the
back angle from like in front of him.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I didn't know what we were looking at. I
get the out of here.
Speaker 1: Terry Funk in the ring has now undone his ring
and Hogan gets in and he starts choking Hogan but
wraps his forearm around it so you can't see it.
Speaker 2: Fucking just the best. Brilliant, Yeah, just fucking brilliant. And
it works because it's fucking Hogan. Hogan's going out and
the referee is distracted with Jimmy Hard for a second
because uh dude, okay, this even better. So he does
that ref's distracted, choking him with the arm. Jimmy Hard
distracts the ref so Terry can throw the tape away.
Speaker 1: So I love this whole sequence. Yeah, it was just
super smart using the wrist tape in general as something
I'd never see anymore.
Speaker 2: Super underrated.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, and like using the wrist tape and hiding it,
which is like you, like, I don't know, just super
well done. It seems so simplistic and so like obvious,
but it was just super cool to see it played
out here. Funk then hits a pile driver on Holk
Hogan and Hogan kicks out it too. Uh. Funk starts
punching Hogan and Hogan starts hulking up. The crowd is
coming up huge for it too.
Speaker 2: This isn't like a normal hulk up war like. It's
full pantomime like he's just coming up and the crowds like.
Speaker 1: Oh shit, Terry Funk has no idea what to do.
Ho Cogan is fucking just taking everything here, hits the
big boot. Funk falls to the apron. Jimmy Hart on
the outside now has a branding iron.
Speaker 2: Oh shit.
Speaker 1: The ref is distracted because Junkyard Dog is trying to
tell him that, hey, Jimmy Hart has a branding iron.
Hogan goes to suplex Terry Funk in from the apron
and Jimmy Hart hits him with the branding iron. So
Funk falls during the souplex on Hogan and gets a
two because Hogan gets his foot on the road.
Speaker 2: Mm and of course Jyd's gotta fucking be on Jimmy
Hard's boxer, so he runs over in head butts.
Speaker 1: Funk argues with the ref he's super pissed.
Speaker 2: Oh my god.
Speaker 1: It allows time for Hogan to get up, and then
Hogan hits the ax bomber for the three.
Speaker 2: Holy shit, dude, I don't know. I expected the leg
drop to be the finish, but he hits this xbom
where I said, oh, that's it, and it was. It
was yeah, and funks cell after this is tremendous. He's
losing it. He grabs the ref and he's so just
like out of this world that confused and pissed about
what happened that he grabs the ref and he's pushing him,
and him and the ref both fall through the middle
rope over they.
Speaker 1: He throws him against the barricade. Yeah, dude, that was crazy,
only shit. Vin says, we will be finding him, Oh
you will, you will. Where will that money be going? Mcmhn. Well,
Hogan does a promo with me and Gene after the match,
and Hogan says that, uh, he hasn't had enough. Terry
Funk come back here, now, why don't you drag off
that dead manager of yours?
Speaker 2: You know what, boy? I had enough? Come on back, Funk,
And Jean says, Jyd come on in, and Jyd didn't
I strike keeping an eye on Jimmy Mouth of the
South Hartin. Jyd says, they don't call me to deputy
dog nothing.
Speaker 1: Me and Jean says, that's the dog, this beauty dog.
Speaker 2: Let me try the dog noise one more time.
Speaker 1: You failed again. You do nothing but fail. Hoole Coogan.
Speaker 2: You're gonna fail in life soon, dude.
Speaker 1: You want to say that in my face. So, George
the animal Steel was given shock therapy by doctor Sigmund
Ziff and he could speak normally for a minute. Now.
Speaker 2: I don't know if you heard this, Tony, maybe you
heard this, but I swear they say. Vince says George
Steele's first appearance on Stennis Man event where he saw
treatment from the psychiatrist gynecologist. Shot, that's right, this sounds good.
Speaker 6: Yeah, you gotta make sure it's a double major.
Speaker 2: Come on god, oh right, he just was picking that
one for today and he he put a goddamn helmet
on George Steele's head and it zapped the shit out
of him, and he said, tell me something intelligent. George
Steele says, how now, brown cow, and everyone starts marking out,
and then George Steele starts freaking out. He fucking runs away,
and that's where we find him at the zoo and
he runs into bushes and takes a shit, and now
we're back in real time and George Steele is going
down a slide and he splashes the shit out of
Mean Jane and Captain luel Bino just very obnoxiously. I mean,
I think mean Gen and Captain lu should have started
stomping him out right there. They don't mean. Jane says,
do you think George is suffering from ring rust? And
Captain Luke says, what you think because of the water.
She says, no, bring rust is when you haven't wrestled
in a long time.
Speaker 1: And George Steele says, ducky.
Speaker 2: Yeah. He says there'll be one hundred percent mentally and
physically capable tonight. And Jeane says, let's find out from
Jesse Ventura if Tamacha Man has talked the lovely Elizabeth
how to swim. And as James said, George Daniel Steele's
laying there and he has a duck. He says, ducky
and Bean Jean says, please we go, and Jesse Evan
Toura is here again and he's with Macho Man and
Elizabeth and they're I mean, they're just high up.
Speaker 3: What do you call this like a diving board or
a diving platform, right or something like that.
Speaker 2: I mean there's no board, but they're definitely in an
area where you jump into a pool. Yeah, like a platform,
yeah yes, And they're gonna have to walk in here.
Jesse says, well, how are you how are you planning
tonight's strategy? Macho man and macho manzo for who? What
do you not know your book? The fu is wrong
with you now? Looking to shoot? You're out here playing
in the fucking pool.
Speaker 8: I know you're not talking to me like that. I'm
my day to come to the fucking water park. He says, Well,
what should I be worried about? George Steele?
Speaker 2: And Jesse says, well, you never rested him, and he's
a little bit different. And what do they call me? Well,
macho man, what are they called? George? Oh? The animal?
Would a real man be scared of an animal? My
main purpose he to d is that teach this woman
how to swim.
Speaker 1: Fore she's I.
Speaker 2: Mean again he has a big patch with George Steele.
Speaker 3: That she made. Purpose she's gonna swim.
Speaker 2: You know, we're gonna lake. So Macha man is here.
He's gonna help Elizabeth swim and he does so uh,
and Jesse says, are you gonna give her a couple lessons?
And he says, sure him, this is less than number one.
Then he fucking launches her off the platform and throws
her into a pool and she starts drowning.
Speaker 6: She screams, and.
Speaker 2: They cut away and watchman does it not help?
Speaker 9: He doesn't actually hand onto his knees. Watch I'm coming, Elizabeth,
I'm coming, dude.
Speaker 6: It's like the video where people throw babies in the pool.
They just expected his swim and they float on their bag.
Speaker 1: This weabon of Elizabeth I saw, don't you Well. We
have macho Man, Randy Savage versus George the Animal Steel.
Speaker 2: Macho Man sends Elizabeth to the ring and yeah, and
she's on the apron and holding the rope down from
macho Man, and Macho Man is taunting to some woman
in the crowd, just showing off, and George Steele walks
up to her and starts rubbing his head against her,
starts nuzzling. He's smitten, of course, Elizabeth.
Speaker 1: Well, Lou Albano grabs him and says, you might want
to chill the fuck out. Man. Randy Savage is crazy.
Speaker 2: I mean he will he will hold a lufelong grutch
against you. Chill the fuck out, buddy.
Speaker 1: So machra Man gets in the ring and of course
he's fucking pissed.
Speaker 2: How many and then he starts doing Nick Jackson's time.
Speaker 1: Well, the bell rings and George the animal Steel starts
going nuts and Macha Man immediately powders.
Speaker 2: I mean he George steels area farming to the cree
the stance of all time, and Macho Man is scared
shitless just by the way he looks.
Speaker 1: Macha Man comes back in and locks up, but George
Steel backs him down, bites him and shit cands.
Speaker 2: Them, which is fucking legal as ship well.
Speaker 1: George goes to the outside, but he sees Elizabeth and stops,
which allows the Macho Man to get back in the
ring and run away.
Speaker 2: You got fucking list in your eyes.
Speaker 3: He's smitten.
Speaker 1: Macho Man then teases a few top rope b ax
handles to the concrete floor, but.
Speaker 5: He does.
Speaker 2: I would just let him do it, like the chance
of him fucking injuring himself is way higher than me
being heard.
Speaker 1: He playing a two K games, tryning to run oother
the way after the trying to test if I could
do finishers to the floor off the top, answers no, sadly, well,
Macha Man takes over. Once they get back in the ring,
George Steel fires back with, uh, the best way to
put this is some potatoes, and they head to the floor.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean he's clubbing them.
Speaker 1: Macha Man runs around and George Steele is chasing him,
and Macha Man grabs Elizabeth and hides behind her to
very loud booze, maybe the most booze we've gotten tonight.
Speaker 2: The crowd like they love Elizabeth and you fuck with
her at all and they don't fuck with you. And
that's why this macho man thing works tremendously because like
she's like the queen here.
Speaker 1: Well, they get back in the ring and George Steele
body slams Macha Man and then turns and eats the
term buckle I mean, seemingly out of nowhere.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean it's just his his energy source he gets.
I mean, he annihilates this fucking thing. There's like turnbuckle
juice on.
Speaker 1: So Macho Man tries to grab George Steele, but George
Steele pushes all the turmbuckle juice into him and makes
it great.
Speaker 2: Visual it does. I mean, it goes fucking everywhere, like
we've never fucking done this to one of our turn
buckles before, So I guess the only way I know
what's in them is by George Steele. But there's a
lot of juice.
Speaker 1: Well, George Steele sees Elizabeth again ringside and he's got
all the turnbuckle juice all over him. He's just it was.
Speaker 2: Spiked man and.
Speaker 3: Giant boner.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, like just looking ridiculous and lust in
his eyes.
Speaker 1: He had that love potion in the turnbuckle.
Speaker 2: That's that shit to made Viscer go crazy.
Speaker 1: Two for two in the water Wrestling Federation, Matra Man
heads to the top and he hits a double axe
and he's chans George Steele for the three one with it.
Speaker 2: I know, I couldn't fucking believe that he won with it.
I said, Wow, this is the show where people win
without their finish. Unless this was his finish, I guess,
But it worked. Wow.
Speaker 1: Your man immediately exits her, abs Elizabeth and walks away
with her.
Speaker 2: Yeah, puts her over his shoulder and goes to the
back and she's, you know, desperately looking on to you know,
see the well being of George the animal stealing oh
Finkle announce his Matchman as a winner, and George Steel
chases him out of the ring.
Speaker 1: Well, hulkgin is here with me and Jean at the
water park again, and me and Jean's listening to his
favorite mixtape.
Speaker 2: He's listening to the Rough Riders and Jean's dancing. He's
got headphones on and okay, this mean Gene, Hey Gino,
And he pulls his headphones off, and Jean says, Hey,
I don't touch my shirt. Funk off me, Hogan.
Speaker 6: Her life bell, Oh shit, shit, fuck.
Speaker 2: As so me. Jean says, you got a boogiy on down,
hulks her and what do you do?
Speaker 1: What do you doing?
Speaker 2: Mean Gene, And Jean says, I'm listening to a song.
We made a video for it. Video for what, dude,
A video for the highlights of w F nineteen eighty five,
like Russell Mania. Dude, you better believe it. Well, let's
watch it, dude. So that's what we get. We get
a long ass highlight video. This song kicks ass. I
don't know what this is. Is this dubbed? It has
to be right?
Speaker 1: I think it is.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I don't know what the real one is the
fucking song.
Speaker 2: Loved it and it's legit just playing like a year
of Year interview of WF in nineteen eighty five.
Speaker 1: Yeah, just a montage video pack is very eighties.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was cool. I liked it. And Vince says,
all right, there you have it. Anyone who who was
anything in the WWF in the year and review video,
and Jesse vent Tour says, did I blank or did
I miss Jesse the body in that McMahon and Vince
as well, that's right. You weren't on it, were you?
Speaker 7: You know what?
Speaker 2: You know who is to blame, Probably you McMahon, And
that's so called executive producer. That's spindly leg Knobby need.
Dick Eversall thinks he created Sarah Dix Eversaw Dix Eversall Korea.
I guess I he's he's the main man here in
the Saturday's Main Event era.
Speaker 1: Well, Nikolai Volkoff and Freddy Blassie have a town hall
here Peace.
Speaker 2: Match tonight with corporate Kursher and Nikolai Volkov and uh,
don't know what that is. Still don't know what that is.
And there's really no rules, Uh, spoilers, and it's just
kind of an agreement I guess between the two to
have a clean match.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's right.
Speaker 2: So yeah, pure rules, that's right.
Speaker 1: Freddy Blassie says, tonight you have three road breaks.
Speaker 2: Pershner, fuck you.
Speaker 4: Not you?
Speaker 2: She go the fuck.
Speaker 7: To.
Speaker 2: Nikolai says, the Russians are peaceful people who will not
stop till we bring the peace to the whole world.
And the match is the first step to stop American
militaryism with superior wrestling. And I say, though, the Russians,
a socialist republic, are much more superior. And he shakes
his head, agreeing, of course, says all right, cool, thanks.
Wait a second, are in chak? What the fuck.
Speaker 1: Gene mean?
Speaker 2: Russia number one? Iran number one? Act all right, appreciate
that chake. So they show two clips of Corporal Kirshner.
One he's crawling in the grass and the other one
he's skydiving.
Speaker 3: Not sure, I don't know what's going on there, right.
Speaker 2: He was in the air war fighting birds. Jesse's Corporal
Kurshner has shown his stuff. Can he do the same
in the water? You see him at home anywhere? Why
is that Tan Kirshner says, because the United States Military
has given me the finest training in survival that's possible anywhere.
I'm dropping this land, ice, land, milk. I don't care
where it is. I'm gonna survive and prevail. I don't
know what the I swear to God. He said Iceland
and milk.
Speaker 3: He does say milk.
Speaker 1: Yeah, No, Corporal Kursner lands in milk.
Speaker 2: Some Oh my god. Okay, maybe you knew this, James,
because you are you kind of have some knowledge on
this more than I do. But Corporal Kurshner was also
leather Face and Freddy Krueger and super leather Face.
Speaker 1: Yeah I did that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, dude, that's fucking fantastic. What a way better career.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I don't I remember. I only know it because
I remember we talked about it. This had to be
so long ago. I feel like we talked about a
leather face or anything on the pot forever. Yeah, and
I'm pretty sure we said. Corporal Kurshner, which.
Speaker 2: Is honestly the same feeling I have now, says I'm
going up against a Russian strung man. I won't need
any combat tactics. I'm going in like it's a wrestling match. Well,
fucking wow, unbelievable. You can't do this. The best man
is gonna win. I'm gonna go in there like it's
a search and detroy mission. This man's playing search and destroy.
Jesse says, while you show the viewers the proper method
to entering the water, why and I don't believe that
whatever Corporal Krisher does here is the proper method to
entering water. He grabs the zipline and fucking is dancing
in the air before going into it.
Speaker 1: Elizabeth saw, well, he was in the war and he's
about to be in the war again here soon.
Speaker 2: That's true, You know what, that's a fair point. I mean,
he what do I know? But if I was him,
I would maybe put on a leather face.
Speaker 1: I grabbed the chainsaw.
Speaker 2: And then also be super fready the glove.
Speaker 1: They ain't care who I was, So I got the
glove or chainsaw and the machete.
Speaker 2: Didn't care that I was skydiving until I put the
mask on.
Speaker 1: So Nikolai Volkoff, Iron Chic and Freddy Blassie are in
the ring and they do the Russian national anthem.
Speaker 2: I mean a ton of heat here Even funnier is
when they show the shot from below and you can
see Freddy Blousee trying to mouth the words.
Speaker 1: Someone doesn't drink at Nikolai Volkoff's health. Yeah, Corporal Kirshner's
music interrupts and him and the boys come out.
Speaker 2: Is this the Marines?
Speaker 1: No, it's not, McMahon, don't don't ever say this is
the Marines ever again? Mcmagh. You couldn't lace my boots then,
you couldn't lace them. Now, why didn't we have me
or maybe Dick Marsenko doing this match McMahon.
Speaker 2: Corporal Kosher wouldn't have lasted a day in my boots
McMahon or well, coming up the peace match, Vin says,
we saw Reagan and gorbish Off on TV this week,
so it's only right we have this peace match. Whatever,
Just fucking get on with this shits.
Speaker 1: How badass would this match be if it was Nikolai
Volkof versus super Freddy.
Speaker 2: Well Jesse? Freddy Krueger is here? What the hell mcman
am I in a nightmare?
Speaker 1: Mcmahony has the power glove.
Speaker 2: Well Jesse? That movie sucked.
Speaker 1: We don't think can well, this is a peace match,
my thought here, this is what I wrote. I said,
this is a peace match. I have no idea what
it means. Maybe it means they won't cheat.
Speaker 2: It's a piece of shit mcmah, piece of ship. Yeah,
so that's the idea, right, Like this is a a
piece treaty match, like they've agreed not.
Speaker 1: I'm glad you come around McMahon. Now maybe you can
come around on a few other things.
Speaker 2: I have a sheet, a list of demands McMahon. We
should have peace. Yeah, so you're right. I think that's
what it is. The idea is that they're gonna be
They're gonna have a clean contest between the two.
Speaker 6: No combat, no combat moves whatever that means. What are
combat move?
Speaker 10: Okay, done, lights out, gorilla radio, McMahon, turn that ship up.
Speaker 1: So they lock up a few times before Corporal Kurshner
finally gets the hold in. Good luck, Yeah, Corporal Kershner
and Nikolai Volkov, corporal they do a test of straight
and they both look great. Here. I mean they're in
good shape.
Speaker 2: Okay, I'll give them that. Like the work that they
were doing was a okay with me. It's just I
thought we'd get somewhere, but we don't really well.
Speaker 1: Volkoff takes down Kershner and bridges them into a pin
for a two. Corporal Kurshner then rolls up Volkoff and
it's just a one and they shake hands because this
is this is good. We're at a piece match.
Speaker 2: Right, peace, Yeah, you know there they've agreed.
Speaker 1: So Volkov does a cartwheel to get out of a
spin cycle and Kershner takes them back down.
Speaker 2: It's impressive.
Speaker 1: Volkoff backs down Kershner to the ropes and then knees
them in the stomach and jaw jacks them and then
drops a knee and beats them for the three, and
commentaries pissed beat them.
Speaker 2: That's not peaceful, that's you can't tell me that's fair
and square, And even fucking Jesse says, well, you're right, McMahon.
I did. I did see him do that, and he's
not even agreeing with that. So they're, you know, try
and get some heat here. And I liked it the
part where they're like doing a hold on the ground
and I'm looking and I'm like, oh wow, the crowd's
like into this until I look out and see like
just everyone's not watching or doing anything. All right, there
might be dubious tactics here on the audio. Maybe no,
maybe just the everyone butt hardcam side was super into
the match.
Speaker 1: Right yeah, everyone that was excited for this one was
sitting in the same section, opposite art camp.
Speaker 2: Just anywhere get put the camera iron. She comes in
after this cheating tactic and he spits on Corsioner and
corporate Kirchner is pissed. He gets up and he beats
the fuck out of him. He fucks up Volcof and
Chic and he Scoop slams Chic and double Nogg and
Knocker on the sheet and Volcoff and they powder and
she so fired up from this, looks at the camera
and starts flexing.
Speaker 1: He looked good.
Speaker 2: Du he looks fucking awesome. I'd probably give him the belt.
Speaker 1: Also, I swear to god the referee was Dean Malinko.
Speaker 2: Dude, Wow, where do I write that? Did I write
that for the main one of these fucking matches? I
think it's the mean I wrote that down. If it is,
but he he looks just like him, is fucking exactly.
Speaker 1: Like I think that's Dean Malinko. McMahon, I think that's
that's not McMahon was Halloween. Did you know that?
Speaker 2: Oh right, sorry, So.
Speaker 1: It shows mister Fuji and Don Morocco kicking Steamboat while
he was down and then choking him out on the ropes.
Speaker 2: Holy shit. Yeah, the Hangman them and uh coming up
Dragon's Revenge, but not before Don Morocco surfing. Don Morocco's surfing.
He's a gigantic man, and then all the women want
to have sex with him.
Speaker 1: He looks so crazy. I mean, he is really big.
Speaker 2: His head is so small compared to his body, which
is huge.
Speaker 1: Well, we get the Don morale and mister Fuji town
Hall and me and Jean says, what you guys did
to steam but it's socked man, fuck you guys.
Speaker 2: Yeah dude. Well, Don Morocco says, oh, it's little Ricky complaining.
Andji looks at the camera and says no, no, no,
and he's tried not to laugh.
Speaker 1: I mean, what an asshole thing to say. I thought
that was awesome.
Speaker 2: Yeah, little Ricky complained, Fuck you, he said. All I
was gonna say is Ricky as Jyd is a partner
and that could present a problem for you too. And
Don Morocco says, if I was a maleman and worse suspenders,
then I'd be worried about Junkyard Dog. And he says, Fuji,
what do you do to dogs in Japan? And Fuji says,
in my country we roast dogs and fry them and
boil them, and Junkyard Dog can have his choice. It's
fucking crazy.
Speaker 1: In my country. We love dogs.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well there are pets, our best friends. We love dogs.
That's the heat, I guess, little dog eat. It's a
dog heat dog world.
Speaker 1: So Don Morocco and mister Fuji make their entrance and
we head over to the Ricky Steamboat in Junkyard dog
town Hall.
Speaker 2: This is good too, and mean Jean says the steamboat.
You must be a glutton for punishments. You've been hijacked, hoodwinked,
bush whacked virtually everything by mister Fuci and a Morocco,
and Steamboat says, you've said I've been bushwhacked and all
that shit. But what said I've been hung in blested
with a chair. But there's one thing they haven't done,
and that's beat me. And I've got the best man
I could have on this particular night. He's got the
biggest bite of them all. And I think those two
bit off a little more than they can chew, and
Jyd says, these guys have been doing everything they could
to Ricky and a lot of people. They've been setting
bad trends in the wrestling world. They've been setting bad
trends that they want the kids to follow. I don't
like it, and I know you don't want your kids
following it. I'm gonna do my best to help Ricky
do something about it. Fucking super Baby promo. I'd like
the kid thing. That was actually like an inclusion there
that like, the heels are setting bad examples and that's
also a reason why they should be stopped. Yes, I
like that tool.
Speaker 1: So we have Don Morocco and mister Fuji versus Ricky
Steamboat and the Junkyard Dog. I also liked that the
Junkyard Dog just felt like he wanted to help Ricky
Steamboat because it was the right thing to do. I
think that was pretty coo.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's that's cool. I mean, that's kind of j
White this whole show. He's just like, you know, the
fucking bad guys are being jerk offs, and if I
got your back because of that, we know we don't
have to be friends. But what's right is right.
Speaker 1: So the match starts as a brawl in the ring.
Don Morocco and Junkyard Dog are the ones that stay
in the ring.
Speaker 2: Dude, it was like we came back from commercial. The
first thing I see is Don Morocco full sprint dropkick
j White Dude, Yeah, nuts, he's too big for that.
Speaker 1: Mister Fuji body slams Ricky Steamboat on the concrete floor.
Speaker 2: Holy fuck, I know, and even they sell a big
on commentary. Holy fuck on the concrete.
Speaker 1: Junkyard Dog hits a back body drop on Don Morocco
in the ring, but misses a falling headbutt. Great bump
from Junkyard Dog. Here it was.
Speaker 2: It was awesome.
Speaker 1: Mister Fuji comes in, it hits a punch combo, but
Junkyard Dog gets up and hits a body slam and
Fuji begs off. Morocco comes in off a tag and
takes a silly look at arm Drag.
Speaker 2: I mean, you know it was not the best work there,
but you know it was fine in.
Speaker 1: The match with mister arm Drag Ricky Steamboat too. So
Junkyard Dog hits another body slam for a two Steamboat
punches Morocco and he walks back into a punch from
the Junkyard Dog. Junkyard Dog then headbuts Morocco straight in
the nose.
Speaker 2: Dude, Jyd's like physically like his offense is great. His
punches look awesome. All the punches he was hitting here,
I was like, oh, those look real now. Whether or
not they were or not is another thing it could
have been. But the head butt too, A lot of
head butts to the top of the head. This legit,
like you said, look right on the nose. Great fucking stuff.
Speaker 1: Mister Fuji comes in and takes down Junkyard Dog and
they start to heat him up. Don Morocco misses a
spear in the corner and steamboat gets the hot tag. Yes,
steamboat comes in. He chops down Don Morocco and hits
Fuji on the apron. Steamboat then hits a combo in
Zigiya Morocco. That looked great.
Speaker 2: It's awesome.
Speaker 1: Yeah, and then he catapults him into mister Fuji.
Speaker 2: Dude, I'd love that. So like mister Fuji is getting
in to try to stop his house of fire and
steamboat sling shots Don into Fuji. It was like perfect timing. Seamless,
really like that could have went you know, it could
have looked shittier and it was. They must have been
doing that for a minute.
Speaker 1: Steamboat hits a flying cross body, but Fuji breaks it up.
Should have been it, dude, I mean, how perfect did
that cross body look?
Speaker 2: It's unbelievable.
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, mister Fuji comes in, but Junkyard Dog gets
tagged and he head butts Fuji. Junkyard Dog then pins
Fuji for the three off the head butt.
Speaker 2: That's his fucking move. He beats you with his big
ass hard head like that that don't had the way
to doe yea and uh Steamboats he's uh, you know,
he's sucking up Don Morocco here and the heels get
out of there, and Ricky Steamboats trying to get out
of the ring to go after them some more, the
rofees holding him back, which lets Don Morocco punch him
in the head a couple of times on the floor
just as a fuck you, and Jesse Ventorya says, well,
Steamboat started it, and uh, I mean again, fun fucking
match tag match stuff here is so simple back when
in this time it's like, but it all works, It
all works.
Speaker 1: So well it does. And uh, I was surprised at
the output on this show. I think, uh, I think
pretty much everything on the show is good. I enjoyed.
I enjoyed the peace match. Uh you know, they didn't
even they didn't have time. The whole thing was for
him to cheat, right, so they and I can't complain
too much about that.
Speaker 2: It was and actually the work that they did was
actually fine too, like, yeah, if there was more after it,
I would have been like, oh, this is actually a
good match, But it was a means to an end match.
I'll take it, especially with everything else we had.
Speaker 1: He should have he should have lost, walked to the
back and then come back out as Freddy Krueger.
Speaker 2: Whether the face goes out with the chaw's arms off,
what the hell is it?
Speaker 6: Pieces over?
Speaker 2: What the And now we're sending it to Freddy Krueger
at the pool.
Speaker 1: Put the glasses on.
Speaker 2: The dude, Freddy on the beach of the glasses is
so fucking awesome it yeah, god, yeah, I hope he.
I mean, Corporal Kursier needs to put the fucking glove back.
Speaker 1: It's time to get back to work.
Speaker 2: Lace the glove up. Brother, Let's get her down.
Speaker 3: He needs to come back down the glove.
Speaker 2: I you know what, I okay, I'm I think I
probably talked about this before, just because we're fucking talking
about I don't know if I'll ever get a chance
to talk about this again. But I was at a
show Easton to be Arena. It was a one the show.
They never ran another show again. It was called Wicked Honymonton.
I don't know what that meant or why was that
fucking horrible show? But the main event was Raven versus
super Leather, and I don't know if that was the
real super Leather or not, Like I might have saw
corporkursioner whoa.
Speaker 1: I mean, it could have been anybody.
Speaker 2: There's a good chance it was not him. But in
my brain, now that I think about about it, I'm
going to say that.
Speaker 3: It was and that's awesome.
Speaker 2: If it was, hell yeah, Well the match was horrible.
Raven did twenty minutes of comedy to start the match
internal haha, like fucking with corporate Kushner or sorry, super Leather.
He was on the mic doing like a stand up
routine for twenty minutes and then they did crowd probably.
Speaker 1: So Vince McMahon is here with Jesse Ventura to end
the show, and Jesse challenges any other commentator in the
world to do what he did tonight.
Speaker 2: The greatest thing we saw in that McMahon was what
Jesse the Body did, the first and only commentator to
step into the ring. I challenge any other commentator in
the world to do what I've done. And Vince says,
all right, well, we'll be back for more. And then
we're back and there it's just them again. But all right,
all right, happened New Year? All right? Then we get
the ending credits with that. I mean, the credits are
long too. They give shouts out DICKX, Edward saw uh
and they show like you know, satura Night's Man event
history highlights here and that's the end of the show.
Speaker 6: I'm sitting there for their Marvel post credit, waiting forirst
for super Leather in the.
Speaker 2: Water, bomp it out here. I mean, fun fucking show man.
I gotta say, like I I I think this again,
what was this an hour?
Speaker 1: Yeah? Hour six?
Speaker 2: Yeah? So I mean super well, I mean a lot
of a lot of talking, but it's weird, like it
didn't feel maybe because the talking segments were so tight
and the guys that are talking were all great promos
for the most part that it didn't feel like it
dragged on too long between the matches, uh, and like
the matches were all fucking fun. I got to see
a fucking WBF title match with Terry Funk, and.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that's awesome. I don't know how long Terry Funk
was around in the WF at that time, but.
Speaker 2: Okay, I think that's what call my eye about it. Tony.
I was like, oh fuck, I actually like don't really
know much about Funk's run here at all. So like
I didn't know he was what your heart and he
was doing the branding iron shit here, Like I'm sure
you know he already had a wrap. He was fucking
forty years old. So yeah, John for a second, yeah,
but like yeah, I mean it was cool. Yeah, I
enjoyed this thoroughly. Well, that is it for WWF Saturday
Night's main event January fourth, nineteen eighty six, And that
is it for our show. Thank you for joining us.
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