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Speaker 1: When your old career gives you lemons throwing some ice

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mix in some vodka. Call it a podcast from the

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Mac of All Trade Studio in Fairport and driven by

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Victor Chrysler Dots Jeep Ram. It's Billified, the Bill Moran Podcast.

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Speaker 2: Hello and welcome. Thanks for getting your pot on, Thanks

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for telling a friend. That's how we spread the word

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about the pirate ship. Uh, this is a solo it's

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just me. You may want to turn it off right now.

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I don't know. I hope not. I'm gonna do these

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once in a while, just me. I think, like once

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a month, thoughts on different things. And if you ever

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maybe I'm a fool even say this, but if you

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ever have a topic that you'd like to hear my

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thoughts on, I would be happy to do that on

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these kind of episodes. But we're gonna throw these in

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every once in a while. Uh. You know, I've had

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I've had a lot over the past couple of days,

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and my head's been in many different places and you know,

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kind of spinning around, right, you know, like all of us,

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all kinds of things. But one of the things I see,

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and there was a headline that recently grabbed me in it,

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and I guess it was focused on Matthew McConaughey, and

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it said sometimes the best thing to do is to

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step away from a parent, right from your parents. I

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think the actual headline is why breaking up with a

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parent is sometimes the right choice. And it kind of

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makes me sad and I and probably because I just

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had yet one more memorial service for my dad that

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I'd like to explain a little bit more than I

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did on the on the previous episode, but you know,

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it kind of brings everything sort of sort of to light,

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and I'm having a hard time being a parent myself.

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It's fucking hard, man, It is fucking hard to be

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a parent. I think it's harder today to be a

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parent than it was when I ray, when I was

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part of the raising. I guess I can say that

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of my older two boys, who are in their early

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to mid twenties right now, it's harder. There's more information

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that is available to everybody in an instant and I

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think there's also some of that shows you, like, hey

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to your parents. I don't know what it is, but

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your parents do this, tell them that blah blah blah.

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I have no idea if that's in my head, but

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I think that it just is harder now and I'm

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having a bit of a tough time parenting my kid,

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and I'm trying to do it in I hate the

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term gentle parenting, but almost like I want you to

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know your heart. You're a fifteen year old person. I

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want you to know you heard, you're heard, and you matter,

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and whatever you have will work in consideration, I'll give

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you one like you see how I'm dressed today, It's

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kind of how I wanted him to dress when we

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went to the memorial service for my dad and he

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was upset, didn't like it, thought it looked ridiculous, blah

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blah blah, and maybe I made the wrong choice, but

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I said, Okay, wear that, bring a shirt you would

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rather wear, and after dinner on the boat you can change.

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And that's what he did. I don't know if that's

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the right thing to do or not, but it felt

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like somewhat of a compromise. That way, you're heard, We

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got our thing. I have no idea, and that's why

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I think all this is kind of hitting me. And

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I think for anybody who's a parent, it's tough. It's

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tough in today's date age, and it used to be

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my way or the highway, and that just doesn't seem

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to work anymore because there's so much information available and

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so many different influences on your kids that they know

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my way or the highway is fucking old school and

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they're not you know what I mean, They're not having

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any of it. It is how I see it, So

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you know, I try to more or less be a

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guide and don't forget he is his mom and I

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separated when he was nine, so there's obviously that would

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be traumatic, is what I think. So well, going back

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to it, because the memorial service was for my dad

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a lot of times the only experience that we have

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being a parent. Right there. You always hear people go

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there no manual on how to be a parent. No,

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there's not, And I think a lot of it has

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to come from gut or what your parents did. And

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sometimes what your parents did may not have been the

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best things, so you know that doesn't work, or maybe

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it does work, or maybe you do the exact opposite

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of your parents. I certainly feel like some family members

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of eye of mine do the opposite of what our

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parents did. However, I will say this. I don't think

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that any parent is the same to each child. I

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think that you parent each kid differently. You just do

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and and that's a necessity at times. I think Laura,

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who's on the podcast, said at best ones, she worries

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that her one son feels like the other kid gets attention,

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she said, but he needs it because of this. And

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she wrote him a letter that she's going to give

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him later on in life. And I go, boy, that

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to me is like, that's great parenting, right because I

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can't explain it to you now. You're not going to

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see it, you're not going to understand it. But I

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want you to know. I want you to always know,

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especially as you look back on your life, that you

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were loved and supported. And I think that's such an

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important thing to say. And I say that now because

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my dad was. He was a different cat man. He

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was just a different dude in certain ways, certainly presented

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from his exterior, extremely conservative suits, ties, the whole thing.

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One of the funniest mofos I've ever been around in

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my life. I remember being at Saint John Fisher College.

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He comes to visit, stuffing beers in his socks and

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walking around and doing all this and people just laughing

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and loving him and wanting, you know, always excited when

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he would come visit me at camp. He was just

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he had was the life of the party in a sense,

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and he had had this very very serious side, but

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he didn't get sports and he didn't get things. And

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you know, this past weekend we had the memorial service,

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and the reason we did was he was up in

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Maine and things transpired in Maine, and he said, I

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would like to have a church service, an open casket,

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and I want to be cremated. Then I want when

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a couple months passed and the dust settles, I'd like

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you to have a big party. And we thought down

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in the Hudson Valley, where he spent majority of his life,

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where he built the home we grew up in, would

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be the best place to have it. And there were

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a lot of coworkers that he had and friends that

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he had, and friends of the family that still live

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there or could get there much easier than they could Maine.

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So we thought, okay, we'll do this, and my sister

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did an amazing job putting this all together, and it

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was a lovely weekend. It hit me harder than it

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did when it happened in Maine. It hit me a

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lot harder, and uh, I wanted to I was going

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to tell this story. I was going to tell this

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story because of course they have me kick off the

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past the mic to tell stories about, you know, our dad,

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and there were some wonderful ones, really really great. So

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I start, and what I was going to say is,

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I'm back at Saint John Fisher University working on a

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master's in mental health counseling. I submitted my first paper,

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a really simple thing, and I was going to call

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him and I realized, oh my gosh, I can't call him.

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And those are the moments that when you see a

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headline like the one I shared just a few minutes ago,

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why breaking up with a parent is sometimes the right choice,

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it just kind of hits me different. I'm not saying it.

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If you feel like that's the best thing for you,

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you got to do it is the best thing for

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you in your life. But either way, so it just

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kind of hits me different. And I was about to

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tell that story, and I you know, we were on

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the boat on the upper deck because it was sunset,

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and we were watching the sunset as we did this,

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and I look and right in front of me is

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my mother, who was married to my dad for thirty

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almost thirty eight, thirty four, somewhere between thirty four, I

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don't even know. I gotta think thirty eight years before

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they separated. And I did call her after I submitted

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my paper Fisher, but I didn't want to say I

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don't know why. It was one of these things where

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I'm like, I don't want to say I was going

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to call my dad, or you were second best is

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how I felt she would hear it. So I didn't

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do that. But this all made me think a lot

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about my parents, right. You don't want to hurt one's feelings.

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Sometimes you felt like you were walking on eggshells. They

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are people too, They have feelings, they have stuff, and

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as you parent yourself, you kind of draw back on

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those memories. My own man, I would always think like,

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he didn't understand radio, right, he didn't like that, he

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didn't he didn't care for it, he didn't understand it.

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So right there, you could kind of go, well, they

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never supported me. No. What my dad had was a

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love of knowledge, an absolute love of knowledge. Yes, he

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went he was highly educated. But I think even if

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he wasn't, he had a love of knowledge. He had

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words that were just I mean, you would never hear

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in your life ort the little bit of food on

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your face, which, by the way, I'm hearing his offensive

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now in some cultures, I don't know. I think there's

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another word. I won't get into it, but it means too.

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I think it's lask or lasking or lasking about adding

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urineto like the tanning of leatherns things or whatever. The

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guy had a love of knowledge, the point being that

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that was where his strong suit was. But he allowed

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each of us to go find our own way. We

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were never forced. It wasn't like why aren't you going

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into the family business, not that there was one, but

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like teaching, why don't you follow in the footsteps of

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your parents? None of us really did, and I guess

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the closest would be my sister, but nobody really did.

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They all kind of went on their own, and you

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were allowed to do that, which I thought was really

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really wonderful when I look back. You were not forced

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into doing anything. Now, my father didn't would tell me

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all the time. When I hear a voice come on

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the radio, I pushed the button, like you could take

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that and it could destroy your confidence or whatever. I

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don't know why it didn't. Maybe I kind of knew

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inherently that that wasn't That may be true for him,

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but it wasn't like he wasn't supporting me. Don't forget

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I played football. I look up in the stands. He's

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doing a crossword puzzle. He didn't get it, but he

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was there. That's my point. He was there, and I

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think that that's maybe the best thing he can always

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do as a parent. Sure, you're gonna fuck up, you're

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gonna mess things up, you're gonna say the wrong thing,

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you're gonna piss a kid off. You're gonna embarrass your kid,

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maybe embarrass yourself, and as a result, the kid is embarrassed.

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Whatever happens, I don't know, but I think when it

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comes down to the bottom line, it's feeling loved and supported.

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I mean, this is a guy who always talked about,

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you know, not listening to the radio. He was so

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proud he bought a new car. I've never had the

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radio on in the car ever, and I would always

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look around at my family and go, that's how I

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make my money. Why would you you know what I mean,

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why would you say? But that's okay, because he was

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at comedy shows. He came up once he was here

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for I think one of my sons had Grandparents' Day,

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Jordan in high school, and my father shows up in

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a three piece tweed suit, looking like he's about to

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negotiate Brexit. And he after he was at grandparents that

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he came over. I was on the radio and he

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wanted to see what was going on. So he sat

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in the studio and I offered him a mic. He

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said no, And then as we're talking, all of a sudden,

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I hear a voice. It's him. He's trying to chime

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into the conversation. And when I said put a mic,

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I don't know if it was a fear of his,

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but he did love it, and he did like some

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of the banter that went on on the radio. He

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did and I and somehow that was communicated, maybe not directly,

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certainly what was communicators? I don't listen to the radio.

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Oh that's fine, that's your choice. But he I never

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I guess they never really fully felt unsupported. And there

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was one story that I wish I had shared about

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my dad and again. You know, maybe it's these moments

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that later on we all find out about our parents,

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and our parents our kids will find out about us

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00:13:15,840 --> 00:13:18,960
that there was something that we did. My dad wasn't

240
00:13:19,200 --> 00:13:23,240
big on drama, and he wasn't big on making a

241
00:13:23,320 --> 00:13:25,159
you know, a big stand on things, unless you were

242
00:13:25,159 --> 00:13:29,480
buying a seventy eight dollars bottle of wine at Thanksgiving dinner,

243
00:13:30,000 --> 00:13:33,279
which is another story. But there was a time when

244
00:13:33,320 --> 00:13:36,600
in radio they decided that they wanted me to do

245
00:13:36,759 --> 00:13:40,200
a stunt, right, and there were these companies that went

246
00:13:40,240 --> 00:13:43,000
around and did radio stunts. So I was to be

247
00:13:43,399 --> 00:13:47,279
entombed in concrete for forty eight hours. They would just

248
00:13:47,440 --> 00:13:49,600
I would lay down in this thing and they would

249
00:13:49,840 --> 00:13:54,639
pour the concrete over top this like coffin basically, so

250
00:13:55,559 --> 00:13:59,480
all these people wore gathered there. I am. I don't

251
00:13:59,519 --> 00:14:02,480
even think, well, I probably wasn't that point about a

252
00:14:02,559 --> 00:14:07,200
year into my marriage and had my first child already, Jackson,

253
00:14:07,879 --> 00:14:11,080
and I think it might have been two years into

254
00:14:11,080 --> 00:14:13,600
our marriage, and then then I think my wife was

255
00:14:13,600 --> 00:14:15,360
pregnant with our second child. That's what it was at

256
00:14:15,360 --> 00:14:19,039
the time. So I am going to be entombed in

257
00:14:19,080 --> 00:14:21,919
concrete and my father had come up. And again you

258
00:14:21,960 --> 00:14:25,279
talk about like feeling supported in love. Had a townhouse,

259
00:14:25,960 --> 00:14:28,799
was taking wallpaper off the bathroom or something wanted a

260
00:14:28,799 --> 00:14:31,279
paint of yellow. The walls were a little goofed up

261
00:14:31,840 --> 00:14:35,240
from you know, any construction when they do these. Let

262
00:14:35,240 --> 00:14:36,919
me just say this real quick, because I did work

263
00:14:37,000 --> 00:14:40,480
on some construction crews, especially years ago, on condos, and

264
00:14:40,519 --> 00:14:42,639
some of those will come in what they call prefab.

265
00:14:43,039 --> 00:14:45,840
They'll already have segments of the walls done and the

266
00:14:45,840 --> 00:14:50,399
wires already threw everything. So the drywalls on there, the beams,

267
00:14:50,799 --> 00:14:52,799
it's all in there and they're wired and all you

268
00:14:52,799 --> 00:14:54,200
got to do is kind of just hook it up.

269
00:14:54,240 --> 00:14:57,240
It's just sort of a plug and play. It's called prefab.

270
00:14:57,960 --> 00:15:00,720
And I think sometimes I'm not sure the condos I

271
00:15:00,759 --> 00:15:03,799
lived in or I actually owned at the time was

272
00:15:04,639 --> 00:15:07,440
a prefab or not, but I know that the walls

273
00:15:07,440 --> 00:15:09,159
were a little buckled and things like that. So my

274
00:15:09,240 --> 00:15:10,879
dad was coming up to help me kind of smooth

275
00:15:10,960 --> 00:15:12,879
some things out. I wanted to hang a different door,

276
00:15:13,360 --> 00:15:15,320
and I and if you know anything about doors, that

277
00:15:15,320 --> 00:15:17,200
it can become a pain in the ass if the

278
00:15:17,720 --> 00:15:20,440
framing isn't exactly right right so you're shimming and doing

279
00:15:20,480 --> 00:15:22,559
this shit. So he came up to do that, and

280
00:15:22,600 --> 00:15:24,840
then I was being entombed in concrete. So my mother

281
00:15:25,080 --> 00:15:27,919
came over with my wife to watch me be entombed,

282
00:15:27,919 --> 00:15:30,600
and they got very upset because it basically was the

283
00:15:30,639 --> 00:15:32,960
shape of a coffin. And I just laid in this

284
00:15:32,960 --> 00:15:35,000
thing and I had I will admit I had started

285
00:15:35,039 --> 00:15:36,919
to have a mini panic attack, but I can go

286
00:15:36,960 --> 00:15:40,080
into that thing where I'm just like, Okay, dude, you

287
00:15:40,120 --> 00:15:41,960
said you were going to do this, We're gonna do it.

288
00:15:42,039 --> 00:15:43,960
Let's just breathe. And I pretended like it was a

289
00:15:44,000 --> 00:15:46,480
fort and I was a kid and I had the Internet.

290
00:15:46,519 --> 00:15:48,720
And I did stay in there for forty eight hours.

291
00:15:48,720 --> 00:15:52,600
There are many other radio morons that tried this and

292
00:15:52,679 --> 00:15:58,960
didn't stay for forty eight hours. So that being said,

293
00:15:59,759 --> 00:16:03,159
the my father then went up because my wife and

294
00:16:03,240 --> 00:16:05,000
mother were so upset. My mother was so upset. It

295
00:16:05,039 --> 00:16:07,200
was like watching me be buried, and it was just

296
00:16:07,320 --> 00:16:11,279
driving her nuts. So of course, when you know, it's

297
00:16:11,320 --> 00:16:13,039
like my father used to always say, it is just

298
00:16:13,039 --> 00:16:14,519
clean your room. I don't want to hear your mother

299
00:16:14,919 --> 00:16:19,240
right right, that would be so. But she got to

300
00:16:19,320 --> 00:16:21,480
him and so he went up to see it himself

301
00:16:22,200 --> 00:16:25,200
and then realized that there was only one air hole

302
00:16:25,720 --> 00:16:28,759
that was kind of going down and providing air to

303
00:16:28,840 --> 00:16:32,399
me in They had like almost like a I guess

304
00:16:32,440 --> 00:16:36,000
you could call it like a periscope, right that people

305
00:16:36,039 --> 00:16:38,639
could talk to you through it, and it was but

306
00:16:38,679 --> 00:16:41,799
it was your only air source down in there. So

307
00:16:44,879 --> 00:16:48,080
this is radio, man, This is how radio worked. They

308
00:16:48,200 --> 00:16:52,759
just not everybody was great at covering all the bases,

309
00:16:52,919 --> 00:16:54,919
you know what I mean, And you can never it's

310
00:16:55,039 --> 00:16:58,720
it's bad because who do you put point the finger at,

311
00:16:59,000 --> 00:17:02,039
because you go, well, why at the top, Well, somebody

312
00:17:02,120 --> 00:17:05,839
was delegating. There was promotions teams, programming teams and all

313
00:17:05,839 --> 00:17:11,039
this stuff, but nobody found like security to kind of

314
00:17:11,200 --> 00:17:14,759
stay around the clock. And I don't think anybody thought

315
00:17:14,759 --> 00:17:17,759
about it. I'm not sure if I even I know

316
00:17:17,839 --> 00:17:19,359
I didn't think about it, but I don't even know

317
00:17:19,400 --> 00:17:21,039
if I were in charge, if I would have thought

318
00:17:21,039 --> 00:17:24,039
about it. And my father gets there and sees this

319
00:17:24,240 --> 00:17:28,200
and realizes that that's the only air source and is

320
00:17:28,240 --> 00:17:32,119
like shit, man, if some prankster comes and covers that hole,

321
00:17:33,559 --> 00:17:36,279
there's going to be nothing, Like he's going to suffocate

322
00:17:36,319 --> 00:17:41,039
in there and die. So my dad stayed the weekend.

323
00:17:41,839 --> 00:17:44,079
I think my brother, who is going to school in

324
00:17:44,119 --> 00:17:46,480
Ithaca at the time, came up. It was at Cornell,

325
00:17:47,440 --> 00:17:51,559
and the two of them sat all night long, the

326
00:17:51,640 --> 00:17:53,640
two because I was in there for forty eight hours,

327
00:17:53,640 --> 00:17:58,680
so two nights overnights while I was in there, I

328
00:17:58,720 --> 00:18:02,680
had no idea. I never really knew that until like

329
00:18:02,799 --> 00:18:05,920
years later. Once I got really upset with my father

330
00:18:06,000 --> 00:18:07,880
over something and it might have been like I didn't

331
00:18:07,880 --> 00:18:10,119
feel like I was supported. I don't even know, but

332
00:18:10,680 --> 00:18:12,880
and I heard that story and I was like, oh

333
00:18:12,920 --> 00:18:16,000
my god, like it almost brought me to tears because

334
00:18:16,000 --> 00:18:17,759
it was one of the most loving things. And he

335
00:18:17,920 --> 00:18:21,359
never said a fucking word. He went to the radio

336
00:18:21,400 --> 00:18:24,279
station and guys and goes, do you have security overnight

337
00:18:24,279 --> 00:18:26,960
if somebody covers that hole, if somebody does something, And

338
00:18:27,000 --> 00:18:31,039
they're like, oh yeah, we got security and nothing. So

339
00:18:31,160 --> 00:18:35,039
my dad stayed every night. And I guess that's kind

340
00:18:35,039 --> 00:18:39,160
of the point for all of this. Maybe this is

341
00:18:39,200 --> 00:18:42,839
more for me, I don't know, but the fact that

342
00:18:47,079 --> 00:18:50,359
there was such love, and I do remember like the

343
00:18:50,480 --> 00:18:53,359
last time I talked to him, and I always wish

344
00:18:53,440 --> 00:18:56,480
I turned around and looked down the hallway at him

345
00:18:56,680 --> 00:19:00,559
as he was there. I said, I love you so much,

346
00:19:00,599 --> 00:19:04,279
and he said, there's so much love from this end

347
00:19:04,319 --> 00:19:08,200
for you, and that was always true. And I think

348
00:19:08,240 --> 00:19:11,160
sometimes we don't feel it. And I think as the

349
00:19:11,319 --> 00:19:14,039
as the child, and I think sometimes as the parent,

350
00:19:14,039 --> 00:19:18,200
we feel misunderstood and maybe we don't communicate well, do

351
00:19:18,240 --> 00:19:21,559
you see me. I'm starting to tear up, and I

352
00:19:21,599 --> 00:19:25,839
think that it's really really hard. But whatever you're doing

353
00:19:25,880 --> 00:19:29,480
as a parent, keep doing it. And if you and

354
00:19:29,559 --> 00:19:31,759
your gut feel like you can do better, or you

355
00:19:31,799 --> 00:19:34,599
should do better, or you should be more present, then

356
00:19:34,680 --> 00:19:38,400
do that. You know exactly that all the answers to

357
00:19:38,640 --> 00:19:42,680
pretty much everything in life is inside all of us.

358
00:19:42,839 --> 00:19:45,000
We have a gut for a reason, and we know,

359
00:19:45,720 --> 00:19:47,680
you know what I mean, We just know. And I

360
00:19:47,720 --> 00:19:51,400
would say I hope that my sons will look back

361
00:19:51,440 --> 00:19:55,599
and realize I wasn't I never was trying to force

362
00:19:55,640 --> 00:19:58,240
them to do anything. I used to always say, as

363
00:19:58,319 --> 00:20:01,039
long as they have a motor to do something, I

364
00:20:01,119 --> 00:20:05,000
don't care. Education was a huge deal for my family

365
00:20:05,480 --> 00:20:08,440
growing up. It was you were in I guess you

366
00:20:08,480 --> 00:20:10,599
could say some people would say you were brainwashed. You

367
00:20:10,640 --> 00:20:14,519
were indoctrinated with this stuff, like they do certain things.

368
00:20:14,839 --> 00:20:17,559
But my father used to say, just to show you,

369
00:20:17,599 --> 00:20:20,519
like low key, that there was always an expectation that

370
00:20:20,559 --> 00:20:23,119
you would go to college. Even for my kids when

371
00:20:23,359 --> 00:20:25,559
the boys were like the older guys were really little

372
00:20:25,559 --> 00:20:27,279
and they were being burped as babies, and one of

373
00:20:27,319 --> 00:20:29,279
them would let out one of these echoe bur I

374
00:20:29,319 --> 00:20:31,759
mean babies sometimes they Jesus Christ, they sound like a

375
00:20:31,799 --> 00:20:34,240
party favor. They're like exploding for both ends and it's

376
00:20:34,279 --> 00:20:37,279
all kinds of noise, and he would go, that's a

377
00:20:37,319 --> 00:20:40,799
dorm room quality burp. They're gonna love you in the dorm, right,

378
00:20:41,160 --> 00:20:47,119
low key telling you education. College it's always talked about.

379
00:20:47,200 --> 00:20:49,960
It's an expectation, it's built in that that's what you do.

380
00:20:51,640 --> 00:20:54,440
I think that again, you got to know your kids.

381
00:20:55,240 --> 00:20:59,720
What's best for them, What is the greatest thing you know.

382
00:20:59,839 --> 00:21:02,240
We can say college is not for everybody, and it

383
00:21:02,279 --> 00:21:05,799
sounds trite. It's not. And if that's not who your

384
00:21:05,880 --> 00:21:08,759
kid is, why force them to do something that's gonna

385
00:21:09,160 --> 00:21:13,039
make them miserable. I mean, I do agree working hard

386
00:21:13,160 --> 00:21:16,720
at something and getting through it and seeing the end

387
00:21:16,759 --> 00:21:20,519
result there's a great satisfaction to that there's nothing better

388
00:21:20,559 --> 00:21:23,920
than that. Thus me going back to school. Right once

389
00:21:23,960 --> 00:21:27,240
I get through this, it'll be it'll be amazing. Right now,

390
00:21:27,319 --> 00:21:30,079
there are days where I feel like I'm underwater. But

391
00:21:30,960 --> 00:21:33,400
that doesn't have to be college. That could be something else.

392
00:21:33,880 --> 00:21:36,640
That could be something else. And that's why I really

393
00:21:36,640 --> 00:21:38,480
hope my kids will always feel because I think that's

394
00:21:38,640 --> 00:21:40,920
one of the gifts my dad gave us was we

395
00:21:40,920 --> 00:21:43,200
were able to find our own voice. And one other thing.

396
00:21:44,240 --> 00:21:47,839
The reason I got into radio kind of my dad's

397
00:21:48,039 --> 00:21:50,839
not the reason I got into radio. Let me rephrase that.

398
00:21:51,319 --> 00:21:54,240
How I got my first radio job is kind of

399
00:21:54,240 --> 00:21:58,920
my dad's fault in that the morning guy who was

400
00:21:58,960 --> 00:22:02,599
on the Big Rocker in Poughkeepsie, New York, sent out

401
00:22:02,599 --> 00:22:07,720
a thing and had all sixth grade classes write PSAs

402
00:22:08,319 --> 00:22:12,119
public service announcements against drugs, something like that, and it

403
00:22:12,160 --> 00:22:14,480
was some kind of radio thing and he would pick

404
00:22:14,799 --> 00:22:16,519
right and then the kids were to come down to

405
00:22:16,559 --> 00:22:19,839
the radio station and record them. Now, I had dropped

406
00:22:19,839 --> 00:22:23,240
off a tape and a resume from my community college

407
00:22:23,279 --> 00:22:25,160
station at the time before I went to Fisher, and

408
00:22:25,200 --> 00:22:29,480
I did all that and I wasn't getting any callbacks.

409
00:22:29,640 --> 00:22:32,359
And then my dad says, why don't you come in

410
00:22:32,400 --> 00:22:35,200
and teach the sixth graders in my class how to

411
00:22:35,200 --> 00:22:37,680
write PSAs. So I went in for a day and

412
00:22:37,720 --> 00:22:40,039
I taught the kids how to write PSA's because I

413
00:22:40,079 --> 00:22:42,880
had learned in college. And then on the day of

414
00:22:42,880 --> 00:22:45,000
the recording, it was I think it was a Sunday

415
00:22:45,160 --> 00:22:47,799
in the spring. My father's like, I'm not giving up

416
00:22:47,839 --> 00:22:50,319
my Sunday. I worked too hard. Bah bah bah bah bah.

417
00:22:50,559 --> 00:22:53,160
Go down there because they picked kids from every school.

418
00:22:53,200 --> 00:22:54,799
I think there were five kids from every school. So

419
00:22:54,839 --> 00:22:57,279
there are five kids from his school, and they needed

420
00:22:57,279 --> 00:22:58,920
a representative from the school, and he said to me

421
00:22:59,000 --> 00:23:01,480
go down to the radio station and be my representative.

422
00:23:01,799 --> 00:23:05,200
So I went down there and I started talking to

423
00:23:05,279 --> 00:23:08,880
management people. I figured out who the radio management people were,

424
00:23:09,240 --> 00:23:10,720
and I said, hey, I dropped off of tape and

425
00:23:10,720 --> 00:23:13,480
a resume. I'm really interested. And I got hired because

426
00:23:13,480 --> 00:23:15,720
of that. So it was kind of you see what

427
00:23:15,720 --> 00:23:18,799
I'm saying, Like I so as much as I could say,

428
00:23:18,880 --> 00:23:22,759
he had no interest in radio, but he didn't discourage me.

429
00:23:23,359 --> 00:23:25,720
And I think that that's the greatest thing. Let everybody

430
00:23:25,759 --> 00:23:28,200
find their own way, be there to guide them, keep

431
00:23:28,240 --> 00:23:30,200
them on the rails, so to speak. Right, Let's not

432
00:23:30,279 --> 00:23:32,160
let you hurt yourself. Like my old man used to

433
00:23:32,160 --> 00:23:33,799
say to me, I'm not here to ruin your good time.

434
00:23:33,839 --> 00:23:36,079
I'm just here to keep you alive. I think that's it.

435
00:23:36,160 --> 00:23:41,279
But parenting is not an easy job and it is

436
00:23:41,319 --> 00:23:43,880
pretty rewarding. You got to admit that. Right. You watch

437
00:23:43,920 --> 00:23:46,279
your kid play sports, you beam with pride when they

438
00:23:46,319 --> 00:23:49,039
do something great. Right. You watch your kids achieve something,

439
00:23:49,119 --> 00:23:52,079
you beam with pride. Right. But it's not you, it's them.

440
00:23:52,279 --> 00:23:55,000
It's them, and it's their life. And I think sometimes

441
00:23:55,039 --> 00:23:56,720
that's pretty hard for a lot of us. And we

442
00:23:56,799 --> 00:24:02,680
have seen cases. I mean, you know Marenovitch in football, right,

443
00:24:02,759 --> 00:24:05,200
his dad just all the time, and he just hated

444
00:24:05,240 --> 00:24:07,720
it in the end, hated it. Was one of the

445
00:24:07,720 --> 00:24:12,279
most gifted athletic guys on the planet, and yet just

446
00:24:12,400 --> 00:24:14,799
resented because it was kind of forced down his throat.

447
00:24:14,799 --> 00:24:16,960
It was almost as though his dad was living vicariously

448
00:24:17,039 --> 00:24:20,200
through him. And I guess if there's anything in what

449
00:24:20,319 --> 00:24:25,359
I'm saying, it's go with your gut. It's not your life,

450
00:24:25,359 --> 00:24:31,359
it's theirs. See the flaws in everybody you have him

451
00:24:31,359 --> 00:24:37,000
to we all do. I do certainly Jesus, and do

452
00:24:37,079 --> 00:24:40,000
the best you can. And when it all is over,

453
00:24:41,000 --> 00:24:47,400
like it is for my dad Lisa on this planet,

454
00:24:46,079 --> 00:24:50,559
I look back fondly and I hope my guys do that,

455
00:24:51,400 --> 00:24:53,920
even though it's tough. And when I think about it,

456
00:24:53,960 --> 00:24:55,960
I gave my old man a run for his money,

457
00:24:56,279 --> 00:24:58,480
and not even with the funny stuff like you know,

458
00:24:58,599 --> 00:25:02,799
fart powder and call call when he burnt his hands

459
00:25:03,240 --> 00:25:06,400
like we and that that would be mild compared to

460
00:25:07,519 --> 00:25:13,680
car wrecks and girlfriends and uh, speeding tickets and you know,

461
00:25:14,359 --> 00:25:17,200
uh drop mufflers on the on the side of the

462
00:25:17,279 --> 00:25:19,599
highway where I need him to come out and you know,

463
00:25:19,960 --> 00:25:22,640
figure out how the fuck I'm gonna get this wreck home.

464
00:25:22,720 --> 00:25:25,000
And like he did it all, He did it all,

465
00:25:25,160 --> 00:25:28,039
and that's the job of the parent. It is not easy.

466
00:25:28,559 --> 00:25:33,000
So keep going and thank you for listening. This is brief,

467
00:25:33,559 --> 00:25:37,039
and uh we'll be back with the longer one tomorrow

468
00:25:37,319 --> 00:25:39,680
because you know, Danny's got thoughts on the Buffalo bills

469
00:25:40,240 --> 00:25:44,279
and I got to tell you about my brother in

470
00:25:44,279 --> 00:25:46,960
this metal musial day. It's changed my life. I know,

471
00:25:47,480 --> 00:25:57,799
I know, I'm Bill Miran. We'll see you tomorrow, tom

472
00:25:57,960 --> 00:26:00,480
didn't know what to do. I'm trying to eve Young

473
00:26:00,680 --> 00:26:02,920
Law a letter to us, and this was stopped