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Speaker 1: But when you're that age, your guard is not high enough.

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The Mongols can get over the wall very easily, and

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Joe is a Mongol. So Joe is in the back

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of a van speaking Spanish to a Cuban woman about

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how he can.

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Speaker 2: See her soul. You don't know this guy.

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Speaker 1: If you see caterpillar eyebrows speaking Spanish to you about

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your soul, run.

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Speaker 2: For the hills. The wall's not high enough.

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Speaker 1: Hey, hello, and welcome to board another brands banking new

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episode of Bad TV.

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Speaker 2: I'm Dylan, That is Patrick.

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Speaker 3: Permission to come aboard.

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Speaker 2: What's up with you?

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Speaker 3: Well? I wanted more pop and circumstance because it's Buzzball Friday.

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You Uzzball Friday?

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Speaker 2: Okay, a couple of things going on in the studio.

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Kaitlyn's here as well. Say hi, Hey, you were on

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drugs right now? Yes, uppers and downers. You know.

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Speaker 1: I saw a really funny video the other day from

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Reno nine to one one and it.

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Speaker 2: Was tricky, tritty, truth, truty Trudy. She was like, this.

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Speaker 1: One's this one gets me up, this one gets me down,

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this one keeps the demons away, and this one stops

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me from shipping myself now you are on a cocktail

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similar to that you're on what we.

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Speaker 2: Go v uh g lp ones g lp ones. Okay,

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so pat is.

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Speaker 1: Patrick is taking GLP once they are giving him allergies.

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And also you seem impervious to the effects of alcohol

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right now, because I think you're on speed.

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Speaker 4: It kind of feels that way, right which I obviously

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it's going to be a great show.

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Speaker 2: Okay, look look cool.

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Speaker 1: So yeah, if anybody wants any of what pats on,

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you can go to hers dot com use promo code

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bat TV.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, let them know we sent you.

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Speaker 1: And also I think you could just lie about your

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weight on the application.

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Speaker 2: That's what I did.

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Speaker 1: All right, Listen, we're here to talk about below Deck.

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We have a bachelor below deck cross.

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Speaker 3: Over this thing, love love, loved this.

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Speaker 1: We need to have one of these a season. It

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should just be a mandated thing. We have white parties

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every year. Why can't we have fucking creepy bachelor's bringing

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young women onto yachts whatever?

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Speaker 3: Youngling, young whatever. Producer Yeah, young underling, uh huh, suggested this.

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Speaker 1: Young links are the are the children that were slaughtered

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by again skywalker?

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Speaker 2: Yeah, that's true.

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Speaker 1: Underlings, say, can you look up, how many young legs

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Anakin slough you killed nine?

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Speaker 2: Nine. I don't think that's right. Nine. I think nine.

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I thought it was like fifty.

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Speaker 4: And I don't think a lot of blow deck listeners

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probably enjoy Star Wars, but I have to say this

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as a Star Wars fan. You really ruined Star Wars

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when you had Anakin Skywalker kill children.

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Speaker 2: But he did.

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Speaker 1: I know, Okay, I want to make it clear that

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I'm obviously I'm like always grossed out when like gross

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pigs bring young women on boats, and maybe we don't

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need to see that every season. Just a small amendment,

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Maybe we don't need.

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Speaker 3: To see that.

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Speaker 1: Dawn, Joe, I don't. I had my my tail was up.

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I was alarmed someone was trying to be pervy around

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my den right, he seemed like a nice ish guy.

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Speaker 4: It's so funny you say that, because I had the

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same opinion. I was ready to like just dig into

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this guy. And at the end of the day, he

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seemed like just a decent guy. He looks a little

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too old for forty seven. I mean, he should get

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a new skincare regiment. You know, I hate to judge people.

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That's not who I am.

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Speaker 1: You don't and it is. And the important thing in

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this world is to individuate. You can't run from that.

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Speaker 2: If you're a.

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Speaker 1: Judge bitch, just accept that that's who you are and

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love yourself. You don't not need to go on a zempek.

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Speaker 3: I'm a very shallow parson.

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Speaker 2: All Right. How many pods do you give this episode?

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Speaker 3: Okay?

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Speaker 2: I love so. If you want to listen to the.

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Speaker 1: Real House for the Salt Lake crossover with Below Deck

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Big Bath, go to patreon dot com. Slash another podcast network.

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Speaker 4: Also drink Buzzball as a companion piece to the podcast.

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Speaker 3: It just makes it better.

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Speaker 2: Okay, Uh, do the first one if you're gonna do either.

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Speaker 1: Buzzballs are a sign that we're failing as an empire.

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Speaker 3: Okay, lastly, just a note on this.

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Speaker 4: I love this episode is probably my favorite episode of

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the season so far.

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Speaker 3: The Millionaire Matchmaker. Did you ever watch Patti Stanger?

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Speaker 2: We've talked about Patti Stanger many times.

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Speaker 4: Okay, she's never maintained a healthy relationship her entire life.

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Speaker 3: That feels compelled to match. Yeah, it's a wonderful thing.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, what's uh, what's an example? What's what's a good analogy.

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Speaker 3: Well, those who can't do teach I'm.

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Speaker 2: Going to I was gonna say it's like a blind

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guy playing guess who. But that doesn't make any sense.

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Speaker 1: You would have you would imagine that the blind would

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be very bad at that game.

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Speaker 4: Well, it's it's like, uh, well, I went to school

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at musician the Musicians Institute, and a bunch of those

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people are obviously failures, and they're teaching us how to

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play guitar.

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Speaker 2: But getting back to the blind guy playing guests who?

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You know what I'm talking about, right, kay?

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Speaker 1: I mean you know, I mean how would we even

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you know, does your guy have glasses? No, you wouldn't

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even know if that would eliminate anything who your person was,

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or really even where the little tabs are to not go.

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I mean, it would just be a completely I think

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I'm getting a little too hung up.

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Speaker 4: How about going to college and like going to a

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business class and then asking the professor what business did

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you own?

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Speaker 3: He's like, I never owned a business.

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Speaker 1: Okay, that's a little bit better, less fun. How many

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pots forty two? All right, I'm gonna give this episode

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a good amount of pots. I thought it was a

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great time, great watch my favorite thing about this episode

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and my favorite person of the season, and really every season.

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Speaker 3: Can I take a guess? Yeah, of every season?

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Speaker 2: Sorry, I changed my mind. Go ahead, keep going.

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Speaker 3: Uh okay, I thought you were gonna say Joe.

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Speaker 1: No, no, Asia is I just adore Asia. And you

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can tell that Asia's good people because one the way

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she approaches Joe at the end of the episode, just

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like listen.

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Speaker 2: Knock it off, knock it off. She just got a

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good core.

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Speaker 1: But also she was really letting it fly when it

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came to Anna, who is just a mongrel who's going

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to be unhappy for the rest of her.

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Speaker 2: Life, and Asia hates her one hundred pods.

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Speaker 3: Great take.

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Speaker 4: I agree. I picked out Anna as well. She's a

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Russian spy. Oh yeah boy. A true testament to how

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guys pick women.

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Speaker 5: Uh.

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Speaker 4: The two women that have character and are very nice

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and potential, let's get rid of them. Let's keep the

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girl that's not into me. And Uh is a horrible person.

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Speaker 1: I think very shall I think one of the problems

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might have been and we're speaking of the elimination of Leah.

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Speaker 2: It's a good.

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Speaker 1: Bet to say you're a big trumper to a person

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who's chartering a yacht might.

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Speaker 2: Have misfired on that.

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Speaker 3: He said, me too, though.

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Speaker 2: Oh did he really? Oh?

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Speaker 1: Interesting? Maybe he's like us and he thinks that opera

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is just not that impressive.

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Speaker 4: Well, I hate opera. If you sing to me like that,

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you're out of here. I hate opera.

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Speaker 3: That is such a weird I hate it.

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Speaker 4: No, and most most people do. Most people do. No,

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No one likes it. Get in the comments. We all

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hate opera.

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Speaker 2: Get in the comments.

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Speaker 1: Let us know if you fall find the majesty of

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Pavarotti to be something.

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Speaker 3: There's a couple of great songs that work out that way.

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Speaker 2: But we can do it like anybody can sing opera.

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Go ahead, what do it? That's not that wasn't a

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good you because you've nailed it before. But like we said,

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you're on ozebic now, yeah, I can't say so you

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can't sing?

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Speaker 3: Yeah, a little sneefed up. Okay, last thought on this.

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Speaker 2: Because we've given our pots, it's time to move on.

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Speaker 3: Okay, all right, let's move on.

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Speaker 4: It's a it's a new day and we have a

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new fresh single sea rat kissy.

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Speaker 3: She's on the loose.

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Speaker 1: I have a very difficult we have a very difficult

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job with Kizzie and with our jobs generally, we're older,

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we have children.

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Speaker 2: I'd like to think that we're mature.

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Speaker 3: We can't. We have female daughters, we can't talk about women.

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Speaker 1: I don't want to attack Kizzie or be too harsh

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on Kizzie because she's a very very young woman.

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Speaker 2: With that being said, yuck, yeah, I get it.

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Speaker 1: Okay, the sea rats wake with hangovers, there's dough everywhere,

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and it's revealed that Jizzi broke up with Tommy Boy.

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Now Jizzy feels remorse, but also.

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Speaker 2: Not really.

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Speaker 1: She says that the best thing to get over the

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best what is it? The best way to get over someone?

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Speaker 4: So she shares the news of the breakup with Kermit,

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and then we get the cold nature of Kizzie's ability

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to dump someone that she's been in a long term

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relationship with. Call me crazy, but I think she's one

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chromosome away from being a serial killer.

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Speaker 2: Yeah yeah, yeah.

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Speaker 3: Also, if a dude said this on camera, we'd say

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he's a horrible person.

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Speaker 2: Would say he's a disgusting pig.

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Speaker 4: As a girl, when she says it, she's a she's

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a diva.

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Speaker 3: Now she's a freeze.

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Speaker 2: She is a diva.

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Speaker 1: So Jesse goes up to Joe begins to do the work,

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the groundwork. She's laying the grout like a mole. And

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Asia is trying to warn the girls about Joe.

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Speaker 2: Yes, and this.

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Speaker 1: Is why, like, as you grow up a little bit,

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you know, my wife and I watch Kizzy break.

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Speaker 2: Down in tears and say I hate boys. And you

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can laugh about it, right, But.

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Speaker 1: When you're that age, your guard is not high enough.

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The Mongols can get over the wall very easily. And

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Joe is a Mongol. So Joe is in the back

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of a van speaking Spanish to a Cuban woman about

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how he can.

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Speaker 2: See her soul. You don't know this guy.

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Speaker 1: If you see caterpillar eyebrows speaking Manish to you about

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your soul, run for the hills.

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Speaker 2: The walls not high.

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Speaker 4: Enough, dyl boy, How am I going to beat this?

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Let me just hit it with a bunch of meanwhiles. Yeah, kiss,

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he feels out where I'm sorry, Kermit feels.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's the ozempic.

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Speaker 3: Kermit Warren's show. It's the Ozempic. I'm losing it really now.

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Speaker 2: You know, it's tough.

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Speaker 1: You know, some people in the comments are going to go,

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I think it's the buzzballs.

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Speaker 2: It's not.

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Speaker 1: It's not, it's not. That's a stupid thing to think.

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And I'm not even fucking kidding about that. Do you

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know the big ones, the big giant buzzballs, the ones

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that look like kool aid breaking through a wall. He

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could take down four of those and not mess up

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like this. Okay, this is the ozempic which by saying

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he was two hundred and seventy five pounds on an

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online application. Go to hers dot coment for promo code

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bat TV. The new stew arrives. Her name is Kathy.

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Speaker 4: Now, by the way, you would have thought she had

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00:13:19,480 --> 00:13:22,600
a she was holding a sign that said free blowjobs.

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What well, because Joe and Max run out there, you know.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, And if you.

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Speaker 1: Do ever see that sign, While it may be enticing,

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00:13:38,639 --> 00:13:43,320
I don't know, it's a little bit like so you'll

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buy two tacos for ninety nine cents, but you do

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have to think about what's in them.

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Speaker 3: Plankton.

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Speaker 2: So Jizy hopes that Kathy is a lezie. This is perfect.

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Speaker 1: Kathy is she's experienced, she's a chief stew on another boat.

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So she's going to go for Jizzy straight out of

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the gate, but maybe even Asia. I don't know if

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00:14:13,759 --> 00:14:16,240
it's gonna come to that, and I don't want that

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00:14:16,360 --> 00:14:18,639
for Ashia. That's annoying and I don't want Asha to

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00:14:18,720 --> 00:14:23,120
have to be too confrontational, but it would be good TV.

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Speaker 3: Now did she say that? Yeah, Oh she did.

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Speaker 2: Okay, she's a chief stump.

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00:14:27,519 --> 00:14:29,519
Speaker 4: I only well, I know she's the chief stew but

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I think she just basically said she's organizing, hard worker.

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Speaker 1: I'm not saying that she expressed animosity towards Asia or

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00:14:36,720 --> 00:14:39,159
is gunning for her, but I can see a future.

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Speaker 2: We're in them might be a little bit of a

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wrinkle in the show.

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Speaker 1: Now, Josh is really who is Josh? The cook of

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the cook sorry clown boy is really white nighting.

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Speaker 2: For the kidsmeister? Okay, he goes, Hey, if she doesn't

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00:14:54,519 --> 00:14:54,840
want to.

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Speaker 1: Do laundry, she can get the fuck out of here. Okay, Hey, Josh,

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she is not going to you ever.

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Speaker 2: Ever.

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Speaker 4: Even later in the episode, when I think Kermit asks her,

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00:15:08,000 --> 00:15:10,559
it's like, who do you want on this boat? And

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she says everyone in her mind, she was saying, not

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that guy, Ah.

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Speaker 2: Josh, Like we spoke about last week, and you were very.

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Speaker 1: Rude about Josh last week. Okay, Josh is not a

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00:15:33,240 --> 00:15:38,960
stea rat type, right. Usually you know the sea rats

279
00:15:38,720 --> 00:15:41,720
that manned this vessel, they go off to the Nathans

280
00:15:41,879 --> 00:15:45,919
and the Joe's right, Josh is an acquired taste. He

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00:15:46,120 --> 00:15:51,759
is an artist, He's killed people in the past, and

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00:15:52,679 --> 00:15:56,399
he loves clowns. Now, it's going to take a special woman.

283
00:15:56,759 --> 00:15:59,559
You know, I think would be perfect for you, Anna.

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00:16:00,919 --> 00:16:03,840
I think Anna and Joshua be perfect. But let's get

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00:16:03,840 --> 00:16:09,320
to the preference sheet meeting, the preferendship, meaning it's a

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00:16:09,360 --> 00:16:11,159
single event for six birds.

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00:16:12,679 --> 00:16:16,200
Speaker 2: Night two, all of the women, six birds. Six birds.

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00:16:16,200 --> 00:16:17,240
Speaker 3: Why do you call them birds?

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00:16:17,759 --> 00:16:20,039
Speaker 2: Because the Brits do? Joe? Does you know?

290
00:16:20,279 --> 00:16:23,039
Speaker 1: I can't believe I've got six bits coming on the bit,

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00:16:23,159 --> 00:16:24,159
all six bits.

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00:16:25,399 --> 00:16:28,840
Speaker 3: Do you know what the origin of the birds is?

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00:16:29,720 --> 00:16:32,120
Speaker 2: What I call women birds?

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00:16:32,200 --> 00:16:35,080
Speaker 3: Yeah? So I know that, Yeah I do.

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00:16:35,960 --> 00:16:38,320
Speaker 2: Okay, So I'm gonna need you to fact check immediately.

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00:16:39,039 --> 00:16:45,039
Speaker 4: So birds are like very mean and they'll attack you

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00:16:46,320 --> 00:16:50,039
serious and and you gotta watch out for him, and

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00:16:50,080 --> 00:16:50,840
you got to feed them.

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00:16:51,440 --> 00:16:54,919
Speaker 3: Uh huh, yeah. Jonesy on Jonesy's juke Box which was

300
00:16:54,960 --> 00:16:56,639
a great radio show.

301
00:16:57,000 --> 00:17:00,720
Speaker 4: He always called them birds, and uh, that's how we

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00:17:01,279 --> 00:17:05,039
describe him Jones's jukebox, the birds.

303
00:17:06,480 --> 00:17:11,160
Speaker 1: Okay, so, I believe you of your duties, because there's

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00:17:11,319 --> 00:17:12,799
simply no way.

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00:17:14,920 --> 00:17:16,880
Speaker 2: That that is the etymology of birds.

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00:17:18,680 --> 00:17:21,359
Speaker 3: English people call women birds because they're a pain in

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00:17:21,400 --> 00:17:22,680
the ass and they attack you.

308
00:17:23,720 --> 00:17:26,200
Speaker 2: Okay, wait, so, Ai says.

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00:17:26,279 --> 00:17:28,680
Speaker 5: The use of bird to refer to women in slang

310
00:17:28,720 --> 00:17:32,440
originated in the UK, likely stemming from the Middle English

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00:17:32,519 --> 00:17:35,880
word bird b u r d, meaning noble woman, which

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00:17:36,000 --> 00:17:38,799
later evolved and was often confused with the word bird.

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00:17:41,759 --> 00:17:43,799
Speaker 3: Ai is a mess.

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00:17:43,920 --> 00:17:47,680
Speaker 2: Ai is a mess. I gotta say so. The guests arrived,

315
00:17:49,960 --> 00:17:55,000
Joe and Amy arrived first. I don't like no, and

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00:17:55,079 --> 00:17:56,799
I want us talk about it really quickly. Can we

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00:17:56,880 --> 00:17:58,599
talk about matchmakers for a second.

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Speaker 1: To put yourself in a position and in a profession

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00:18:01,799 --> 00:18:04,559
where you have to interface with these kinds of men

320
00:18:04,920 --> 00:18:05,599
all that like.

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00:18:05,680 --> 00:18:07,839
Speaker 2: It's just a really bizarre thing to me.

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00:18:08,039 --> 00:18:11,160
Speaker 4: I'm gonna sound like a jerk. But also women thinking

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00:18:11,160 --> 00:18:13,559
they're going to match up with wealthy people.

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Speaker 1: Uh huh, right, it's a cesspool of characters that I

325
00:18:18,759 --> 00:18:21,480
find it odd to insert yourself into that world.

326
00:18:21,839 --> 00:18:25,519
Speaker 4: Yes, I don't know what the Amy was an epic fail.

327
00:18:27,680 --> 00:18:29,880
Do you see her spill that drink on the stairs

328
00:18:29,920 --> 00:18:30,799
and said kermit?

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00:18:34,039 --> 00:18:40,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, Asia, right now you can ask for a paper

330
00:18:40,519 --> 00:18:46,359
towel sham. Well yeah, so Amy's fine with dinner on

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00:18:46,440 --> 00:18:47,039
the sun deck.

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Speaker 2: Thank you. That's great.

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00:18:49,119 --> 00:18:52,839
Speaker 1: Kizzie and Kathy talk about Sandy's towel. Don't show that,

334
00:18:54,240 --> 00:18:58,440
don't put that conversation on air. And Joe and Ve

335
00:18:58,799 --> 00:19:01,799
played soccer. They both played soccer. Now, Pat, in terms

336
00:19:01,839 --> 00:19:03,799
of sea rat history, how do we feel about this?

337
00:19:03,960 --> 00:19:07,640
Speaker 2: Does it land on the Sea rat sad scale? Soccer?

338
00:19:07,839 --> 00:19:08,160
Speaker 3: Soccer?

339
00:19:08,279 --> 00:19:09,119
Speaker 2: So I just played it?

340
00:19:10,519 --> 00:19:13,759
Speaker 1: We cut to pictures of them in their uniforms as children.

341
00:19:14,559 --> 00:19:16,640
Where does that rank on sad rats scale?

342
00:19:17,279 --> 00:19:20,759
Speaker 3: Zero? Zero zero?

343
00:19:21,640 --> 00:19:23,559
Speaker 2: Okay, So Joe's.

344
00:19:24,480 --> 00:19:27,960
Speaker 1: Had horrible luck in the past with women and Asia

345
00:19:28,119 --> 00:19:30,680
has had it with the opposite sex that she is

346
00:19:30,720 --> 00:19:31,319
attracted to.

347
00:19:32,319 --> 00:19:34,359
Speaker 3: Okay, I'm glad we got there.

348
00:19:34,680 --> 00:19:39,240
Speaker 4: Okay, So h Asia gets to I'm gonna call because

349
00:19:39,279 --> 00:19:41,240
there's two Joe's on this boat, so I have to

350
00:19:41,680 --> 00:19:45,759
differentiate only because Joe, who's forty seven, looks way old

351
00:19:45,799 --> 00:19:46,000
than that.

352
00:19:46,160 --> 00:19:49,759
Speaker 3: He's balding his hair, is flaring up, his skin looks bad.

353
00:19:50,759 --> 00:19:51,480
He's old Joe.

354
00:19:52,640 --> 00:19:53,839
Speaker 2: Okay, old Joe.

355
00:19:54,039 --> 00:19:58,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, Kermit's asking him questions. Look, here's the deal. He's

356
00:19:59,279 --> 00:20:02,079
two set and ways. And that's the problem that happens

357
00:20:02,119 --> 00:20:05,640
with dudes. They never get settled down, and then they're

358
00:20:05,720 --> 00:20:10,079
forty seven and then they're like, like dating your girl

359
00:20:10,160 --> 00:20:13,240
and she's like, oh, I like Selena Gomez and dudes

360
00:20:13,359 --> 00:20:19,000
like I'm out, you know. So Anyway, Kermit tells a

361
00:20:19,079 --> 00:20:22,880
story on her about her war state, and a guy

362
00:20:23,240 --> 00:20:26,759
poured a bath for her and put dish soap in it.

363
00:20:27,079 --> 00:20:30,319
Speaker 3: And then here, Kouchie, can you shut the fuck up?

364
00:20:34,559 --> 00:20:40,680
Speaker 2: Time out, Let's get to an ad brick.

365
00:20:42,759 --> 00:20:43,960
Speaker 3: I have a personal story.

366
00:20:44,000 --> 00:20:48,000
Speaker 2: After this, we'll see.

367
00:20:51,519 --> 00:20:55,559
Speaker 1: You need to calm down because you are sat across

368
00:20:55,640 --> 00:20:57,160
from a lunatic on a zempic.

369
00:20:57,680 --> 00:20:59,400
Speaker 2: Then we have the fix for you.

370
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372
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374
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375
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376
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a bunch of different I don't go to sleeping aids

377
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like over the counter stuff or behind the counter stuff,

378
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you know, because that's how you end up putting a

379
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motorcycle helmet on and then going I need everything. But

380
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382
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383
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387
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Speaker 4: All right, personal story, yeah with Kermit. I guess her

388
00:21:58,160 --> 00:22:02,920
kouchie hurt because uh, she told the story she was

389
00:22:03,119 --> 00:22:09,480
submerged in Dish Dish Dish show. All right, So I'm fourteen,

390
00:22:10,359 --> 00:22:14,799
I get home, I'm depressed, young age.

391
00:22:14,920 --> 00:22:18,160
Speaker 1: Can I really quickly ask you something? Does this personal

392
00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:19,799
story have to do with your little penis?

393
00:22:20,720 --> 00:22:21,319
Speaker 3: My young way?

394
00:22:21,440 --> 00:22:25,839
Speaker 1: Okay, I don't even need to do this, but just

395
00:22:25,960 --> 00:22:29,359
in case people haven't seen the episode, Asha did not

396
00:22:29,599 --> 00:22:32,519
mention her kouchie. She had a rash on her body

397
00:22:33,119 --> 00:22:35,759
because of the dish soap. So now you can talk

398
00:22:35,799 --> 00:22:36,839
about your little penis.

399
00:22:36,880 --> 00:22:39,960
Speaker 3: All right, Fast forward thirty seconds. I'll keep it brief.

400
00:22:40,559 --> 00:22:41,200
I get home.

401
00:22:41,839 --> 00:22:45,440
Speaker 4: I'm really upset with my life. I'm miserable. I'm new

402
00:22:45,519 --> 00:22:49,480
to masturbating. There's nothing around, no lube. I grab dish,

403
00:22:50,880 --> 00:22:54,359
I masturbate with it, and then I fall asleep. I

404
00:22:54,440 --> 00:22:56,599
wake up the next morning with a burning sensation.

405
00:22:57,160 --> 00:22:59,680
Speaker 3: I pull down my pants. My penis looks like Freddy

406
00:22:59,720 --> 00:23:00,599
krug face.

407
00:23:00,799 --> 00:23:06,680
Speaker 1: Ah yeah, yeah, because it looks like it can attack

408
00:23:06,759 --> 00:23:07,839
people while they're sleeping.

409
00:23:08,039 --> 00:23:11,640
Speaker 2: You gotta be careful out there. No, and I mean

410
00:23:11,720 --> 00:23:14,160
lots of you know, I don't know if this happens

411
00:23:14,279 --> 00:23:18,920
is commonly with women. Women are less monkey like with

412
00:23:19,119 --> 00:23:22,559
their yah self pleasure.

413
00:23:23,880 --> 00:23:26,119
Speaker 1: But I mean, I think most men have experienced some

414
00:23:26,359 --> 00:23:32,960
kind of wrong lipid used to lubricate they're little monkey penises.

415
00:23:33,000 --> 00:23:37,279
I mean you've used a mint lotion, a eucalyptus lotion. Right, No,

416
00:23:37,759 --> 00:23:42,880
I don't masterfight. No, All right, moving on, So V

417
00:23:43,079 --> 00:23:44,680
is flirting a bit with Joe on the job. Well,

418
00:23:44,759 --> 00:23:50,160
v V don't get digmatized. Okay, you're a young pro,

419
00:23:50,720 --> 00:23:54,960
been great on the deck, don't fall for caterpillars. Let's

420
00:23:54,960 --> 00:23:57,559
sit down with Amy and Joe. Though Joe likes confidence,

421
00:23:57,640 --> 00:24:00,359
he doesn't want any stray cats, which begs the question,

422
00:24:01,799 --> 00:24:03,039
what would you call.

423
00:24:05,920 --> 00:24:08,079
Speaker 2: A casting call to come on a.

424
00:24:08,200 --> 00:24:14,640
Speaker 1: Yacht to possibly get hitched with somebody you do not know? Well,

425
00:24:15,079 --> 00:24:16,640
I've gone a fucking straight cat.

426
00:24:16,960 --> 00:24:21,440
Speaker 4: Yeah, I love because these girls that old Joe's about

427
00:24:21,519 --> 00:24:25,960
to meet, they have substantial resumes. One of them does

428
00:24:26,079 --> 00:24:29,279
make up for red carpets and another one ran over

429
00:24:29,359 --> 00:24:31,799
to a plate of caviar to take a photo of it.

430
00:24:32,039 --> 00:24:34,720
Speaker 1: Okay, well that wasn't on their CV, and doing makeup

431
00:24:34,759 --> 00:24:38,519
for red carpets is actually a pretty big deal. So God,

432
00:24:40,640 --> 00:24:42,519
we're just gonna have to deal with the symptoms that

433
00:24:42,640 --> 00:24:48,759
arrive on a weekly basis with this stuff. Kizzie nos

434
00:24:48,839 --> 00:24:51,640
V will be upset if she gets with Joe, So

435
00:24:51,960 --> 00:24:54,960
you know that now, Kissie, And you've said I know

436
00:24:55,160 --> 00:24:57,160
it to be true, So we'll see what.

437
00:24:57,160 --> 00:24:58,119
Speaker 2: Happens moving forward.

438
00:24:58,160 --> 00:25:02,799
Speaker 1: We've got Anna, Ashley, Leah, Alisha, Brooke, and Marillie.

439
00:25:02,680 --> 00:25:05,839
Speaker 2: Whoa you you wrote down all the names?

440
00:25:06,039 --> 00:25:09,440
Speaker 1: There were six and you should be shocked because my

441
00:25:09,559 --> 00:25:14,200
notes have been pretty good, no, not good, so it's

442
00:25:14,279 --> 00:25:16,200
it's kind of amazing that I wrote those down.

443
00:25:16,480 --> 00:25:21,799
Speaker 2: We've got one on ones Ashley and Joe. Nothing too eventful.

444
00:25:22,039 --> 00:25:24,680
Speaker 1: Leah sits down with Joe says she's an opera singer

445
00:25:25,119 --> 00:25:26,680
and she performed for Trump.

446
00:25:27,480 --> 00:25:29,960
Speaker 2: I love him. I just love him.

447
00:25:30,920 --> 00:25:35,599
Speaker 1: I would like to see Leah performing opera for Donald Trump.

448
00:25:37,000 --> 00:25:44,160
Speaker 2: Because after not that, I thought you did fantastic. It

449
00:25:44,279 --> 00:25:48,839
was it was great. What are you doing later?

450
00:25:52,279 --> 00:25:54,720
Speaker 1: So there's another lady who wants to sail. Then there's

451
00:25:54,759 --> 00:25:59,920
a Brazilian Mariella, and uh Anna sits down to really

452
00:26:00,119 --> 00:26:03,839
put the cherry on top of this shit Sunday she says.

453
00:26:05,200 --> 00:26:07,160
He goes, have you been to Barcelona before? She goes, no,

454
00:26:07,359 --> 00:26:10,440
sadly not. But it's not Centrupe. What are you in

455
00:26:10,519 --> 00:26:14,279
a fucking Hitchcock movie? What are you twenty one years old?

456
00:26:15,039 --> 00:26:17,559
Jesus all right? A couple of nice ladies, couple of

457
00:26:17,640 --> 00:26:20,480
vomit inducing ones, Sea rat history.

458
00:26:20,240 --> 00:26:21,759
Speaker 2: With Max Ah. I love this.

459
00:26:22,000 --> 00:26:24,440
Speaker 1: He does not speak to his parents, he has a

460
00:26:24,519 --> 00:26:27,759
bad relationship with them, so he gets love from friendship.

461
00:26:28,240 --> 00:26:30,559
Speaker 4: Now I understand this I can relate to this, but

462
00:26:30,759 --> 00:26:33,200
with Max, I completely sid with his parents.

463
00:26:33,319 --> 00:26:37,039
Speaker 3: You suck Max? Have you met yourself? Zero points?

464
00:26:37,119 --> 00:26:42,920
Speaker 2: I love Max. He's crazy, but I love him. So Meanwhile, meanwhile, Gus,

465
00:26:42,960 --> 00:26:47,279
he flirts with Joe. She smiles. Oh, she smells like sweat,

466
00:26:47,400 --> 00:26:52,759
and he likes that. I've never got that sweating.

467
00:26:52,839 --> 00:26:55,319
Speaker 3: Oh are you kidding me? Oh my god?

468
00:26:55,519 --> 00:26:59,400
Speaker 2: I love it. Yeah, you know, I watched this movie

469
00:26:59,480 --> 00:27:01,039
called Year recently.

470
00:27:01,720 --> 00:27:05,920
Speaker 1: It was Daniel Craig. He's in Mexico City in the

471
00:27:06,000 --> 00:27:10,079
sixties or seventies. There was an exodus of gay men

472
00:27:10,160 --> 00:27:11,039
in that city at the time.

473
00:27:11,079 --> 00:27:14,519
Speaker 2: I guess he's just going around sweating and sucking cock

474
00:27:14,680 --> 00:27:15,640
for like the entire thing.

475
00:27:15,680 --> 00:27:16,519
Speaker 3: That's the whole book.

476
00:27:16,559 --> 00:27:18,680
Speaker 1: I mean, I turned it off after about an hour.

477
00:27:18,759 --> 00:27:20,880
I was like, what's what's happening here? He's just losing

478
00:27:20,960 --> 00:27:24,480
his mind sucking cock. Anyways, let's get.

479
00:27:24,400 --> 00:27:24,920
Speaker 2: Back to the show.

480
00:27:24,960 --> 00:27:29,319
Speaker 1: The women have dietary restrictions and Max is speaking French

481
00:27:29,319 --> 00:27:34,839
about stuff. Sandy has Leah and or what's her wife's name, Sandy? Yeah,

482
00:27:34,880 --> 00:27:37,720
what's Sandy's wife's name? Le yeah, Leah, So she doesn't

483
00:27:37,799 --> 00:27:40,079
need to play the field. Now we get to a

484
00:27:40,279 --> 00:27:44,359
little sea rat history with Kathy.

485
00:27:46,680 --> 00:27:53,079
Speaker 2: She was a dentist. I think a high gentist, all right, Well,

486
00:27:53,119 --> 00:27:56,359
she was working with teeth. And then also she stepped

487
00:27:56,400 --> 00:27:58,039
onto a soccer field one time, broke her back.

488
00:27:58,559 --> 00:28:01,599
Speaker 4: Yeah, who gives a shit? Now cleans toilets for assholes

489
00:28:01,720 --> 00:28:03,079
like Amy? Who gives a ship?

490
00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:03,880
Speaker 3: Zero points?

491
00:28:03,960 --> 00:28:07,279
Speaker 2: No, no, no, no, no, that's not zero. She was

492
00:28:07,319 --> 00:28:08,960
told that she might not walk ever again.

493
00:28:09,279 --> 00:28:16,559
Speaker 3: Zero points. You're walking zero points now. Dylan skipped over

494
00:28:16,799 --> 00:28:19,839
Amy spilling that drink on the stairs. It was carpeted.

495
00:28:23,759 --> 00:28:27,920
I don't like that. That's wrong. You you spill a

496
00:28:28,039 --> 00:28:29,920
drink and go uh kermit.

497
00:28:32,279 --> 00:28:38,960
Speaker 2: That's rude, rude, rude, all right.

498
00:28:39,119 --> 00:28:44,160
Speaker 1: So we get to Anna, who says that she's not

499
00:28:44,240 --> 00:28:47,440
here for the guy, She's here for the yacht. She's

500
00:28:47,519 --> 00:28:49,720
going to be unhappy forever. And we get to a

501
00:28:49,759 --> 00:28:54,079
sea red history with Kissie Bellerina strikes. She's uber competitive,

502
00:28:54,079 --> 00:28:56,160
and when she sees somebody like Kathy, even though she

503
00:28:56,400 --> 00:29:01,960
is much more competent and much more skillful at her position,

504
00:29:02,799 --> 00:29:07,440
there is something deep, dark and spawn like inside of

505
00:29:07,519 --> 00:29:10,480
her heart that makes her want to take her down.

506
00:29:11,440 --> 00:29:13,880
Case in point, you have a rip in your ass.

507
00:29:14,400 --> 00:29:15,559
I'm not going to say anything.

508
00:29:15,960 --> 00:29:18,720
Speaker 2: Wow, brutal, evil, little kissy.

509
00:29:19,119 --> 00:29:23,880
Speaker 3: Now it was dark. I don't think a lot of

510
00:29:23,920 --> 00:29:27,720
people would notice that Kissie did fair enough.

511
00:29:28,640 --> 00:29:34,160
Speaker 2: Gussie saw that Cathy had ripped her pants.

512
00:29:36,079 --> 00:29:40,640
Speaker 1: And said absolutely nothing to cause her future embarrassment.

513
00:29:40,759 --> 00:29:41,519
Speaker 2: Let's get to dinner.

514
00:29:42,599 --> 00:29:44,480
Speaker 3: Did you catch any of the food?

515
00:29:44,720 --> 00:29:46,200
Speaker 2: Yep, you did. Yeah.

516
00:29:46,359 --> 00:29:49,880
Speaker 1: It was a summer vegetable risotto with chicken on top

517
00:29:49,920 --> 00:29:55,799
of it, also known as Donovan McNabb Campbell's chunky soup

518
00:29:55,880 --> 00:29:58,960
poured into a fucking bowl with chicken breast on top.

519
00:29:59,079 --> 00:30:03,119
Speaker 2: It was disgusted. Zero pots. Did I catch it?

520
00:30:07,720 --> 00:30:11,920
Speaker 1: Kathy figures there might be something sussed with Kissie because

521
00:30:12,079 --> 00:30:13,039
everyone else.

522
00:30:12,880 --> 00:30:19,960
Speaker 2: Saw her ass. She ripped a beats. So Kathy's on

523
00:30:21,279 --> 00:30:25,880
you know, she understands. She's on watch now. I love Asha.

524
00:30:26,000 --> 00:30:29,000
Speaker 1: She says Anna might be the Antichrist and she belongs

525
00:30:29,039 --> 00:30:32,240
with no one except for Vladimir Putin. This is such

526
00:30:32,759 --> 00:30:39,359
when when people can suss out ickiness and other people

527
00:30:39,559 --> 00:30:43,480
and crystallize it, you know that they're on the right path.

528
00:30:44,160 --> 00:30:48,079
Anna is a perfect vessel for Vladimir Putin.

529
00:30:48,160 --> 00:30:52,240
Speaker 3: Have you meant these people? I have what Icky people

530
00:30:52,720 --> 00:30:54,920
where they're like people.

531
00:30:55,359 --> 00:31:00,799
Speaker 2: But not like I haven't met like the the fucking

532
00:31:01,039 --> 00:31:05,799
bulk and like, oh you haven't. No, No, I've never

533
00:31:05,960 --> 00:31:10,039
encountered that. I don't think that's a that's a weird.

534
00:31:11,680 --> 00:31:13,880
Speaker 3: Twenty two years ago, I was on a movie shoot.

535
00:31:14,039 --> 00:31:17,240
Speaker 4: Can O Reeves was there and this girl because I

536
00:31:17,519 --> 00:31:22,000
constantine No, it was like an independent film.

537
00:31:22,359 --> 00:31:25,160
Speaker 3: I was with a bunch of rich people that were financing.

538
00:31:25,319 --> 00:31:31,160
They're literally bleeding right now, I am anyway, this blonde

539
00:31:31,519 --> 00:31:32,079
Hotcome you.

540
00:31:32,119 --> 00:31:35,119
Speaker 2: Take Kaylin's rag place and wipe the blood off.

541
00:31:35,119 --> 00:31:41,440
Speaker 4: Where I'm fine, I belied. Let me tell this great story.

542
00:31:41,920 --> 00:31:44,400
So this girl walks up to me and she's like,

543
00:31:44,680 --> 00:31:47,319
can we hang out later? And I'm like of course,

544
00:31:48,160 --> 00:31:51,640
and I'm like, we exchange numbers and then she finds out,

545
00:31:51,759 --> 00:31:54,319
like I think an hour later that I am not.

546
00:31:54,440 --> 00:31:56,440
Speaker 3: A billionaire or millionaire.

547
00:31:56,640 --> 00:31:59,880
Speaker 4: Yeah, and she does not call me an hour later.

548
00:32:00,119 --> 00:32:03,759
I was a hangar with thee that had.

549
00:32:03,759 --> 00:32:07,000
Speaker 1: So let me tell you really quickly about GLP ones

550
00:32:07,279 --> 00:32:11,000
and uh taking them when you literally do not have

551
00:32:11,200 --> 00:32:17,640
enough fat to take them. Now, this is anecdotal, but

552
00:32:17,839 --> 00:32:20,240
from my vantage, it looks like it starts feasting on

553
00:32:20,319 --> 00:32:23,119
your flesh and your bones and blood starts to pour

554
00:32:23,200 --> 00:32:26,799
out of I mean, he, I think is being mummified

555
00:32:26,880 --> 00:32:29,079
from the inside right now, So go to hers dot

556
00:32:29,119 --> 00:32:30,519
com use promo code bad TV.

557
00:32:32,680 --> 00:32:37,319
Speaker 2: My God. Leah sings opera once again.

558
00:32:37,599 --> 00:32:42,160
Speaker 1: This is It's not quite as bad as somebody pulling

559
00:32:42,200 --> 00:32:46,079
out an acoustic guitar, but I'm still uncomfortable. I'm still uncomfortable,

560
00:32:46,079 --> 00:32:48,160
and I hope it doesn't last longer than thirty seconds.

561
00:32:51,559 --> 00:32:55,799
Speaker 2: See, I just did it, Kleen. Was that good? Now?

562
00:32:58,039 --> 00:33:01,480
Speaker 3: I kind of agreed with Anna, like, look at your phone.

563
00:33:02,319 --> 00:33:05,960
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, just go oh, I've got it.

564
00:33:08,200 --> 00:33:10,319
I've got a group on like.

565
00:33:10,400 --> 00:33:16,240
Speaker 3: A group living spaces, living social a deal.

566
00:33:16,079 --> 00:33:17,000
Speaker 2: Here, all right.

567
00:33:17,200 --> 00:33:20,920
Speaker 1: So Anna takes a few photos with Max. She says

568
00:33:21,000 --> 00:33:22,799
he's not even hot. I don't know what I'm doing here.

569
00:33:23,240 --> 00:33:26,200
And two people are going to be leaving tomorrow. Now

570
00:33:26,240 --> 00:33:28,000
you would think it would be Anna, No, it is

571
00:33:28,119 --> 00:33:33,400
not Anna. Kizzy begins to speak to the to Joe,

572
00:33:33,640 --> 00:33:36,759
but it's edited in a way that the the the

573
00:33:37,039 --> 00:33:42,319
sound and the proclamations kind of boomerang through the crew mass,

574
00:33:43,400 --> 00:33:58,000
mainly hitting the the the fucking fucking pigs on this belt, Max, Joe, Josh,

575
00:33:58,440 --> 00:34:02,000
I'll perk up. When Kizzie says that she is single

576
00:34:02,960 --> 00:34:07,000
and she wants to get drunk because she is single,

577
00:34:07,480 --> 00:34:11,760
I think she implies that fucking is her favorite pastime, and.

578
00:34:13,880 --> 00:34:17,280
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'll just let you take this, all right.

579
00:34:17,360 --> 00:34:21,719
Speaker 4: Next morning, talking Amy and Joe chat, he picks uh

580
00:34:22,679 --> 00:34:23,559
like a true idiot.

581
00:34:24,119 --> 00:34:29,239
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, old Joe. Ditch to the old bitches. Who's

582
00:34:29,280 --> 00:34:31,880
staying Alicia and Marlea.

583
00:34:32,280 --> 00:34:34,239
Speaker 2: Uh, those girls are hot.

584
00:34:34,800 --> 00:34:39,599
Speaker 3: He dumps Leah and Brooke and then uh, I think

585
00:34:39,800 --> 00:34:43,199
Joe's heartbreaking ways are whispered apart the boat.

586
00:34:44,760 --> 00:34:51,039
Speaker 2: I'm I'm I'm not. It's not even Caitlin's laughing. This

587
00:34:51,199 --> 00:34:55,000
is blood coming from This is not funny video.

588
00:34:57,360 --> 00:34:57,679
Speaker 1: This is.

589
00:35:00,199 --> 00:35:03,760
Speaker 2: This is really really not good. All right. I need

590
00:35:03,840 --> 00:35:04,639
you to get it together.

591
00:35:04,800 --> 00:35:10,000
Speaker 1: All right, Okay, you're bleeding and you're saying this is

592
00:35:10,199 --> 00:35:13,960
this has been your commentary on the episode recently.

593
00:35:15,079 --> 00:35:21,320
Speaker 2: He keeps Alicia and Marlea. They're hot. He gets rid

594
00:35:21,360 --> 00:35:26,639
of the old bitches and you're bleeding not to not

595
00:35:26,800 --> 00:35:29,400
to say I I've had bad notes before too fine. Anyways,

596
00:35:29,440 --> 00:35:33,480
all right, so we rise for the next day. We

597
00:35:33,559 --> 00:35:37,519
get a perfect docking and then we drop the guillotine.

598
00:35:37,559 --> 00:35:40,039
Speaker 1: So Brooke and Leah have been have been let go,

599
00:35:40,719 --> 00:35:44,199
and Asia is confused as hell because she hates Anna.

600
00:35:44,760 --> 00:35:48,039
And I'm wondering if the Sea Routs are going to

601
00:35:48,079 --> 00:35:50,320
get involved here. I'm wondering if Asia is going to

602
00:35:50,400 --> 00:35:54,159
go up to old Joe and go you, why is

603
00:35:54,159 --> 00:35:55,960
your skin so flaky? And also I have to tell

604
00:35:56,000 --> 00:36:00,199
you something. Anna is not here for you. Okay, is

605
00:36:00,280 --> 00:36:00,840
not here for you.

606
00:36:01,000 --> 00:36:01,159
Speaker 2: Now.

607
00:36:02,920 --> 00:36:06,840
Speaker 1: Anna went to can with someone that she did not

608
00:36:07,039 --> 00:36:09,960
know and her tits were out on the red carpet.

609
00:36:10,239 --> 00:36:11,800
Speaker 2: Thank you for that story. That's great.

610
00:36:12,159 --> 00:36:14,679
Speaker 1: So we go on an activity with Kizzie and Joe.

611
00:36:14,800 --> 00:36:17,480
We do mosaic artwork, which I thought was really cute.

612
00:36:17,559 --> 00:36:18,519
Speaker 3: I would love to do that.

613
00:36:18,920 --> 00:36:22,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's a lovely little time. And I gotta say

614
00:36:22,119 --> 00:36:26,400
Joe's boat is actually pretty good. And when we take

615
00:36:26,480 --> 00:36:31,519
our van right back, that is when Kizzy says, dick

616
00:36:31,679 --> 00:36:35,239
is my favorite pastime. Now we'll wrap the episode with

617
00:36:35,400 --> 00:36:42,000
Asha telling Joe that you cannot do this, okay if

618
00:36:42,039 --> 00:36:45,920
you want to shag everybody, she said, shag black and blue,

619
00:36:45,960 --> 00:36:48,239
which is like Jesus Christ, I mean, what kind of

620
00:36:48,480 --> 00:36:52,400
fucking ferocious love making is that? But if you want

621
00:36:52,440 --> 00:36:55,079
to do that, that's fine, just do not fuck with

622
00:36:55,239 --> 00:36:59,840
the dynamics of the boat and fair enough. If I

623
00:37:00,119 --> 00:37:04,079
was a betting man, I would say there is almost

624
00:37:04,519 --> 00:37:07,960
zero percent chance that Joe is not going to do that.

625
00:37:08,159 --> 00:37:10,039
Speaker 2: But we'll see. Next week. Looks like a bit of

626
00:37:10,079 --> 00:37:11,280
a banger kiss.

627
00:37:11,320 --> 00:37:14,280
Speaker 1: He's going to be making out with Maximilian and Kathy's

628
00:37:14,280 --> 00:37:17,000
gonna be pissed off about it. Looks like we're finally

629
00:37:17,079 --> 00:37:19,840
going to get a gest dating ball of snakes. And

630
00:37:20,440 --> 00:37:22,679
are you going to still be on ozempic next week?

631
00:37:22,840 --> 00:37:27,000
Speaker 2: Yeah? Okay, do you have anything that you want to

632
00:37:30,320 --> 00:37:33,079
and the audience and the episode with uh.

633
00:37:34,719 --> 00:37:35,920
Speaker 3: Putting me on the spot here?

634
00:37:36,159 --> 00:37:38,639
Speaker 2: I do you have a fun weekend going planned?

635
00:37:38,760 --> 00:37:38,880
Speaker 5: Oh?

636
00:37:39,360 --> 00:37:41,519
Speaker 3: I had a great time in a great episode.

637
00:37:41,760 --> 00:37:44,519
Speaker 2: No, but this weekend and you're doing anything fun Disneyland?

638
00:37:44,840 --> 00:37:45,000
Speaker 5: Oh?

639
00:37:45,280 --> 00:37:49,960
Speaker 1: He's going to pat at Disneyland on ozempic. Should be

640
00:37:51,000 --> 00:37:53,760
a really fun thing to witness. I hope that you've logged.

641
00:37:54,000 --> 00:37:56,599
Speaker 2: I really do get in the comments. Let us know

642
00:37:56,599 --> 00:37:57,639
what you thought about the episode.

643
00:37:57,679 --> 00:37:59,920
Speaker 1: Go to patron dot com, Slash another podcast network for

644
00:38:00,079 --> 00:38:04,519
or Real Housewives of Salt Lake traders, p mc aps

645
00:38:05,440 --> 00:38:09,599
and just just a more intimate relationship with us, you know.

646
00:38:09,800 --> 00:38:11,480
And we always say that we love our fans and

647
00:38:11,559 --> 00:38:14,079
we love the ones that pay even more.

648
00:38:15,360 --> 00:38:21,519
Speaker 2: Follow Kaylin at what was it Santa Monica Eats or

649
00:38:21,559 --> 00:38:31,079
something and leave us five stars half the best. I'm

650
00:38:31,159 --> 00:38:31,440
dealing with

651
00:38:33,639 --> 00:38:35,000
Speaker 3: Later, dude, Ca