Speaker 1: You.
Speaker 2: I'm now listening to soft core history.
Speaker 1: Ladies and gentlemen, welcome back to sophomore History. I'm your
host of the week, dam Richester, joined as always by
Rob Fox.
Speaker 2: What's going on?
Speaker 1: How are we doing?
Speaker 2: Can I get it? You're welcome?
Speaker 1: What'd you do for me?
Speaker 2: Took care of your fucking dog all weekend?
Speaker 1: That is true, like a day and a half all
fucking weekend. Now he's laying on the couch. Yeah, being
a good boy for now.
Speaker 2: Jeez, he's a pro. He's a pro. He Uh. He
always took shits real fast when he needed to poop. Yeah,
pete and piece immediately, piece as soon as he gets
down the stairs.
Speaker 1: Sometimes he doesn't even wait to get down the stairs. Nice.
Speaker 2: Nice, I like that he's got old hips. But I
was I was nice to chase. And when I brought
the boys my two children over, two of my three children,
I should say them to the dog park and let
them run around, and the boys were chasing them in.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so you're welcome. Actually you're giving your children entertainment.
Speaker 2: You really did, actually like save me this weekend because
I was like, I don't know what fun I'm gonna.
Speaker 1: Do my kids this week, I'm over at the Renfair
doing content. Yeah no for our Patreon Patreon dot com
slash software history. Two additional episodes every week Monday Friday,
and then this week I want to drop a bonus
episode from the Renfair.
Speaker 2: A ren Fair from the ren Fair episode.
Speaker 1: One thirty in the morning me Randy Scott Lopez.
Speaker 2: Boosh, but intercut with like interviews and stuff. One of
our high well easily our highest production value one since
the uh the audio the short Story audio book.
Speaker 1: This is a good one. Yeah, you get high quality
shot nonsense. I can't I and the boys brought it.
They were drunk and high on everything.
Speaker 2: I can't wait. This is why you need to drink
on this podcast, by the way, but I tend to agree. Yeah, yeah,
you need to be cracking beers with me.
Speaker 1: It's like our two Days where they encourage drinking.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and then the lawyer was like, you can't encourage
your employees to drink at work.
Speaker 1: They try to drive, they drive here. Yeah, I'm in
Renfair mode. I'm gonna kind of switch over to the
Revolutionary War mode, okay, because obviously Ken Burns is about
to drop this week November eleventh, so.
Speaker 2: We're gonna do reactions to every episode of that, also
in the Patreon, also on the Patreon. But we're also
gonna do reactions to a show that I believe is
already out, Death by Lightning, Death by Lightning. What is
it streaming on?
Speaker 1: I don't remember Netflix.
Speaker 2: Okay, it's Netflix.
Speaker 1: You should have it. So it's a full drop, I believe.
So I haven't looked at it.
Speaker 2: It's not week by week. It's full drop.
Speaker 1: That's usually how Netflix does it. Okay, Yeah, it's a
mini series. Okay, cool, it's not really a TV show.
Speaker 2: Man. I gotta say that show looks or mini series
looks incredible, and they're cucking it kind of because strange
things drops in like four days.
Speaker 1: This is just for you know, the hard course people
that love history. People listen to the show even though
this show's made for the hardcore history fans.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and ken Burns would be even more ashamed of us.
Speaker 1: Dan Carlin ken Burns would both be discussed by our show.
But here we are, Mama, we are sort of making it. Yeah, Mama,
we're getting getting by Mama.
Speaker 2: We're doing stuff.
Speaker 1: I'm paying the rent. Yeah, this is mine the job,
So please tell a friend about the show. And that's
enough preamble. I'm sure that turned off enough new listeners.
Speaker 2: We're gonna get into about twenty minutes of ads and
then the show will start.
Speaker 1: We turned down ads.
Speaker 2: Actually we do throw away money.
Speaker 1: Today we're going to talk about a man by the
name of Peter Francisco.
Speaker 2: Okay, a Spaniard Portuguese Portuguese.
Speaker 1: Okay, So he's originally born Pedro Francisco on July ninth,
seventeen sixty in the Azores. So I don't even know
what the Azors technically fall under back then at that time,
like some just random duke owned it or something.
Speaker 2: Yeah, who could say? They're Portuguese now right.
Speaker 1: Their Portuguese. Now they're beautiful. I think they're like tropic.
Speaker 2: Yeah they are. They're like the one part of technically Europe.
It's like that's Europe's Hawaii. Let's just call it Europ's Hawaii.
Speaker 1: It's right there too. Yeah, it's like one of the
easier countries to get to. Yeah, they're parts of Europe.
Speaker 2: To go to the Zoris at this point, I go
to the Zoris. Ever a Beza, What am I gonna
do it?
Speaker 1: At Beza?
Speaker 2: I don't want to take xts to see I'm fucking
thirty nine.
Speaker 1: Wait for that midlife crisis and that divorce.
Speaker 2: I'm not gonna get divorced until the kids are old
enough to understand why I needed a new piece. Stay
together for the kids, Stay together for the kids. I
actually the number Okay, first off, for those who don't know,
my marriage is not in any way in trouble. But secondly, it.
Speaker 1: Should be lost with value the welles there.
Speaker 2: Financially, I'm the only one of the job right now.
I don't want to deal with that alimony either. You
get a prenup the that would benefit her if anything, um.
Speaker 1: And we'll get to prenups.
Speaker 2: Let Yeah. The the number one reason that I would
like I would grit through this. The shittiest marriage is
a it's a it's two part. One A is I
don't want to only get my kids for fifty percent
of their childhood and.
Speaker 1: Be oh, battle and court baby, get a good lawyer.
Speaker 2: Not winning that, not winning that.
Speaker 1: Uh So you can get holidays every other holiday.
Speaker 2: You get them for well, you love Halloween, so not Halloween.
You love Christmas and not Christmas. You can have them
for Thanksgiving.
Speaker 1: Give them for Veterans President's Day. Veterans Day works too.
Just give her comb Bank Holidays Columbus Day.
Speaker 2: Yeah, the bank, you get the Bank Holidays.
Speaker 1: Uh.
Speaker 2: The other reason is I just like because she would
date again and I would date again.
Speaker 1: Obviously she's doing better.
Speaker 2: No, now that even she's doing better, I don't want
another man around my children.
Speaker 1: Teaches them how to hunt cook sounds worse already.
Speaker 2: Fish, I don't great. Great one of redneck children. Wonderful.
Speaker 1: You're too good for end nick children.
Speaker 2: You can get them a dirt bike.
Speaker 1: So we were actually supposed to have a bigger group
for the ren Fair this weekend, but are like too
good for camping friends. We're like, we're fine, we'll go
to Worsfest.
Speaker 2: I get that. I hate camping.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you would fall in that Categoryah, I fully fall
into that category. Soft fucking Oh yeah, yeah, let's go
fucking just sleep on the dirt, smell like shits, dope.
I got a nice big tent, have a blow up
like queen size mattress.
Speaker 2: Need a shower every day that showers there. Yeah, I'm
not showering in that fucking dog shit.
Speaker 1: I didn't shower though, because I wanted to be in
the era of the era. I wanted to be historically accurate.
Speaker 2: Here's how I would do it. I would do it
if they had Renaissance era baths.
Speaker 1: Although it was Hero and Villain Weekend, so there's a
ton of like superhero costumes. That's dog shit, flame as hell.
Speaker 2: If you show up to the ren Fair and anything
other than a at least semi era accurate, because the
thing is, you showed up in a Crusader outfit one time,
and that's not even era accurate. But I'll I'll let
it pass. I'll let it.
Speaker 1: I'll allow it.
Speaker 2: It's better than iron Man.
Speaker 1: There was a medieval Superman, which I did allow to pass.
Speaker 2: That's fair, that's fine.
Speaker 1: That was cool. Wolverine, Sure he's immortal essentially.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but he was. He was born in like the
eighteen hundreds. His first war was the Civil War. He
fought in a bunch of wars, but his first war
with the Civil War, so it doesn't pass.
Speaker 1: I guess theoretically he could be alive.
Speaker 2: Though, No, he was born in the eighteen hundreds, all right.
Speaker 1: Canonically, I don't know the canon of Marvel.
Speaker 2: I sort of do, because sometimes YouTube serves to be
clips of movies and I saw the origin story. Yeah,
from that shitty Wolverine movie.
Speaker 1: I have no consequences now because there's so many different universes.
So really it's whatever you want it to be.
Speaker 2: Whatever. Yeah, it's anything.
Speaker 1: So yeah, Actually, all these superheroes fall as long as
they're marvel into medieval times.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Wolverine is bisexual and black and fought for solidude.
Speaker 1: Listen, if we can get the finance.
Speaker 2: And sure, we can get the finance for that.
Speaker 1: So in May of seventeen sixty five, Pedro was playing
with his sister in the gardens of their affluent home
in Porto Judeo when moorsh pirates kidnapped him. So a
five year old tale as old as time kidnapped pirates.
The Francisco family had many political enemies on the island,
and some believe Pedro's abduction was actually set up by
them to protect him from their foes.
Speaker 2: Oh, they paid the pirates to get amount of dollars.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a theory. Okay, there's no confirmation of that,
I feel like, but it sounds like a good story.
Speaker 2: Pay to send him somewhere nicer.
Speaker 1: Then then a pirate ship.
Speaker 2: Galley of a pirate ship in the seventeen hundreds.
Speaker 1: June twenty third, seventeen sixty five, just shows up abandoned
at the wharf of City Point, which is now Hope. Well, Virginia.
Speaker 2: Your parents are crushing it.
Speaker 1: Send them to Virginia.
Speaker 2: What a plan? All right, we're afraid that he might
be in trouble, we don't know for sure. Kidnap him,
drop him off on a dock in this mysterious new continent.
We don't know. It's like the equivalent now of me
being like, take my child, put him on a space
shuttle and just drop him off at the Moon base.
Speaker 1: Yeah, why not? There's nothing for him here this chase.
Your third kid didn't get to Seat Chase.
Speaker 2: He didn't get the Sea chase.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so sammy, Sammy can go to them.
Speaker 2: Go to the moon launch site.
Speaker 1: He did not speak English, and no one understood what
he said, except that he kept repeating his name, Pedro Francisco,
Petro Francisco, Patro Francisco, so they of course called him Peter.
Speaker 2: Well that's the translations. They're like, we're just we're not
doing that. This poor child. This is horrible, I mean,
this is horrifying.
Speaker 1: Revolutionary War Hero the origin story.
Speaker 2: So he's five and seven, he's five and.
Speaker 1: What seventeen sixty five, he has a teen when he
fights in the Revolutionary Yeah.
Speaker 2: The math is interesting, but okay, think.
Speaker 1: Of how many teens were fighting in war in general. No,
a ton people lied about their age in World War
One and World War Two.
Speaker 2: Yep, yep, absolutely had babies fight. I think that I
saw a video of the day I got served a
reel of some kid who was fourteen and lied his
way into like the worst thing you could be in
World War Two if you're an American.
Speaker 1: And he got honorably discharged because they found out his age.
Speaker 2: They found his age, and he got into a bomber group.
He was serving on a fucking B twenty four or whatever,
which is like the casualty rates on those were fucking preposterous.
Speaker 1: Didn't matter who's getting bodies.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Well, also that at least they had fun. At
least if Masters of the Air taught me anything, They
had fun between flights. They got off the plane. There
was a bar.
Speaker 1: Sure have definitely worth going to war so you can drink.
Speaker 2: They seemed like they had fun between flights. Based on
one show, I've seen Hollywood.
Speaker 1: Yeah, totally accurate representation of what really happened.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 1: At first, authorities gave Peter a bed in which to
sleep at a warehouse on the wharf. The local housewives
saw him and he was well fed, so he was
kind of like a community child.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well, thank god. I mean, people are this is
the thing, Like, people are horrible, but also people are
very sweet.
Speaker 1: And people are sweet, especially the kids.
Speaker 2: You're not going yet, especially to children. Yes, and you're
not gonna see a.
Speaker 1: Fun you have the rich elite, of course, who are
the worst of kids? Who the rich elite terrible to kids? Sure, listen, man,
you're real did good. The other day we got to
talk about reptilians and we had to talk about Yeah,
a certain group that ends with Jay. Go check out
the worst reel I've ever posted. That got seven million views, three.
Speaker 2: Point seven million views and counting, like literally the dumbest
I posted so many really funny things, and this dumbass
reel is going mega viral.
Speaker 1: You gotta play the game.
Speaker 2: Gotta play the game.
Speaker 1: Later in the year, he was taken to the Prince
George County Poorhouse, where he had remained until Judge Anthony
Winston took him to his home, hunting Tower Plantation in
Buckingham County, Virginia.
Speaker 2: Well, cancel him. He's getting milkshake. Ducked now he's now
slaves are doing stuff for him.
Speaker 1: No, he's an indenture servant.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, cool, cool cool. Yeah. No, no, he's not
getting a free ride. Oh. I thought the judge took
pity on him and was like, I'll raise the boy. No. No,
the judge was like, that's good livestock, that's.
Speaker 1: Good labor right there. And he's dark enough. He's Portugal. Yeah.
He gains strength and stature from working years in the
fields and eventually became kind of like a blacksmith apprentice. Okay,
I learned to trade for about eleven years and at
the age of around fifteen, he was six six and
weighed about two hundred and sixty pounds at fifteen power forward.
That's a five star recruit.
Speaker 2: Two four seven has given him five stars. Yeah. Put
him on the edge. Oh, I'm saying basketball, Yeah, but
any sport. Yeah, it doesn't matter. Yeah, it doesn't matter.
Speaker 1: Tight end, edge rusher. He could be a power forward,
small forward. Get him to the fucking rim.
Speaker 2: I suppose it just depends on his touch versus his rage. Now,
since he was a war hero, he does sound more
like a d end.
Speaker 1: A little bit more bashing than Yeah.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, I don't Yeah, I don't know how much
finesse he has. So yeah, we're gonna get We'll go
football either way, though, five star recruit. If you're that
at fifteen, you're getting If he's that at fifteen, he
was probably getting offers from fucking Alabama at thirteen if
he was alive today.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's the eighth grader that Lane Kiffin's yes recruiting.
It was also noted that his hair may have turned
silver at an early age, and he was well known
in the area as the Virginian Hercules or the Virginia Giant. Okay,
While living at Judge Winston's, Peter had the idea of
independence for the colonies just drove into his head. Now,
Judge Winston was all about give me liberty, right to
and he told his slaves about it constantly. Yeah, and
they're like, wait, what you mean for everyone?
Speaker 2: Oh?
Speaker 1: For you?
Speaker 2: Uh, I gotta say real quick, you texted me about
this because you were like, have you heard of this?
Have we done an episode on this and I was like, no,
because you use the word giant, and you started this
episode with a five year old being abducted by Moorish pirates. Yeah. Now,
do you recall that we did another episode about a
small person being abducted by Moorish pirates the dwarf who
then showed back up later.
Speaker 1: And grew a foot.
Speaker 2: No, grew to a like normal human size.
Speaker 1: He grew like a foot.
Speaker 2: He grew like two feet. Anyway. I was worried that
this was gonna go dark really fast because when they
asked the dwarf how he grew, and this was like
two hundred years before, I think, he said he got
literally stretched out. He got stretched out in one way
and it stretched him out in another way. On the
pirate ship, he got fucked a lot. He was raped
by pirates for like a decade, and then showed back
up as a normal right. So I was a little
worried that something was about to go left really quickly.
Within the first thirty minutes, ten minutes whatever of this.
Speaker 1: Dude, we're doing an American hero Oh okay, perfect. Even
if that did happen, I wouldn't mention.
Speaker 2: It, thank god.
Speaker 1: Okay, medievil dwarf whatever, dude, I don't care. That's two.
Speaker 2: As we talked about on the last Patroon episode with Mongolians,
if it's far enough back, it's not a war crime,
it's not a horrible thing.
Speaker 1: In the spring of seventeen seventy five, Peter accompanied Judge
Winston to Richmond, Virginia, where he stood outside Saint John's
Church and heard Patrick Henry deliver his famous give me
liberty or give me death speech.
Speaker 2: It's good words.
Speaker 1: Jeez, Henry had them just all fired up.
Speaker 2: I mean, give me liberty or give me death.
Speaker 1: He's about to run through a break wall for Patrick Henry.
Speaker 2: How many quotes go harder than that in history?
Speaker 1: Not many?
Speaker 2: Not many came I saw I conquered like, there's very few.
Speaker 1: I personally lean with the Muhammad Ali quote, what you
ever dream of beating me? You better wake up and apologize.
Speaker 2: It's good too. Peter was released.
Speaker 1: From his intentured servitude and in December seventeen seventy six
enlisted in the tenth Virginia Regiment of the Continental Army.
So he let him go just so he can serve.
Speaker 2: Well, did he or was he like? You can leave
if you immediately pick up a musket.
Speaker 1: I don't think he used muskets.
Speaker 2: Oh this canna get fun, all.
Speaker 1: Right, Yeah, I mean I'm sure he probably shot gun,
shot up musket here and there. Yeah, but he had
a custom made weapon. That's okay too.
Speaker 2: I at this point, from here on out, will just
be picturing the giant that fought with John Snow and
the wild Wings in Game of the Rones.
Speaker 1: I just assume if we're gonna go back to the
Marvel universe.
Speaker 2: We got a hulk. Okay, love that too.
Speaker 1: I do think some people refer to him as like
the American Hulk that's also sick obviously. Now, yeah, there
was no reference for that.
Speaker 2: Hulk was not a thing.
Speaker 1: He fought a few skirmishes under Colonel Daniel Morgan before
transferring to the regiment of Colonel John Mayo. Peter Francisco
was an absolute unit of a soldier. As I said,
he was six six, two hundred and sixty pounds, but
he was a soft spoken giant. They often are, Yeah,
they often are a little sweethearts. Andre he's a teddy bear,
huge heart, Yeah, teddy bear. And as what killed him,
his huge heart.
Speaker 2: His huge, humongous heart, I am a little.
Speaker 1: If you are too big, though, there is such a
thing as all right, you don't you don't have long
to live on this earth.
Speaker 2: Uh yeah, that's it's probably less of a thing now
because obviously Shack's gonna live for a long time.
Speaker 1: But I don't know if he is man. And also
I'm putting the album ning on the clock.
Speaker 2: That's a different story though.
Speaker 1: Yeah, he'll live at seventy you're.
Speaker 2: Right, Yeah, who I think he'll hit the average male
age of death.
Speaker 1: Who are you putting on the clock for Giants Taco Fall?
Speaker 2: Any NFL player? Yeah, Taco Fall for sure?
Speaker 1: Is the clock already taken for Wemby?
Speaker 2: Uh No, he'll be all right for a little while.
But I could see, I could see something. He's already
dealing with blood cloths. He's goddamn twenty.
Speaker 1: Not great, Yeah, no great. Francisco saw action at Brandywine, Germantown,
and then the desperate fighting at a place near dear
to my heart, Fort Mifflin. Is that where you h
on the Delaware River. That is where me and my
high school friends yeap would drink and smoke. And one
night you were to I sawid ghost because they did
a reenactment while we were all drunk.
Speaker 2: You were too high, too drunk, and thought a ghost
battle was happening in front of you.
Speaker 1: I just didn't think they were gonna do a reenactment
at night.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's caught me off shocking for sure. Was it fall?
Speaker 1: I don't know, man, it was before eleven because I
still had like an under eighteen license, right, fair enough.
I can't recall what I ate fair yesterday at the fair,
let alone know what I did.
Speaker 2: By the way, when I was seventeen. I've been sitting
here for twenty minutes being like, why do I smell
like I've been smoking or something? And I realized that
the mics are just smell like fire.
Speaker 1: Yeah we had a fire. Yeah we did the recorded
next to a fi.
Speaker 2: Oh yep, Mike smells like campfire.
Speaker 1: It's enjoyable, though.
Speaker 2: I like it now that I know where the smell's
going from.
Speaker 1: Like, what did Dan do to this?
Speaker 2: No, I'm like, what did I like? Where was what
was I standing near? I thought like someone that I was,
so I went to a bar before I came here.
Speaker 1: Uh and uh, just by yourself. Yeah, that's the best.
That was what Joe Flako says, it is I that
was my favorite.
Speaker 2: A meal by yourself in heaven.
Speaker 1: How many beers you have?
Speaker 2: I had a margarita and two beers.
Speaker 1: Not a fire bar. Right, you just went down the street.
Speaker 2: I drove about twenty miles, but yeah, no, it was
fucking waterloo right down the street.
Speaker 1: Okay. Just had to get away from the kids in
the life nuts.
Speaker 2: I was with them all day. She had a hair
appointment for that lasted four hours. It was like a
coloring appointment. So I dealt with the kids all day.
And then actually we went to a playground and I
had to carry Fin on my shoulders all the way
there and all the way back, which is like a
three probably three mile round trip with an extra forty
pounds on me.
Speaker 1: So I was pretty gassed.
Speaker 2: I needed some beers.
Speaker 1: I did like twenty five to thirty thousand steps yesterday
with forty pounds of equipment. I just rocked.
Speaker 2: Yeah that's all I did. That's what I felt like
I was doing with my child on my shoulders. Something
I'm rocking, Just rocking my baby real quick. Before before
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Speaker 1: Francisco was hospitalized at Valley Forge for two weeks following
these engagements. George Washington, while he was there, commissioned a
special six foot broadsword to match Francisco's size.
Speaker 2: Good lord, why, I mean that's sweet, but you just
had a huge sword, like George is just like, here's
what you're gonna do. You hide behind these ponds, you
hide behind these bodies, and once we get closed, you
just pop out with this sword. Let's gere the fuck
out of everybody.
Speaker 1: On June twenty eighth, seventeen seventy eight, he fought at
the Battle of Momoth, where an enemy must get ball
tour right through his thigh.
Speaker 2: Yeah, post gunpowder. I don't think you want to be
a tall person in an infantry unit.
Speaker 1: Yeah, hand in hand combat. Being tall rad yeah, one
hundred percent.
Speaker 2: You had the advantage for everything, I think because half
the people would just be like, eh, I'll pass on him.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's why the Vikings just rolled everybody for a while.
Speaker 2: Of the little.
Speaker 1: Englishmen, oh you have like a foot and a half on.
Speaker 2: Each Yeah, they're rolling up at like six' one five eleven.
The English dudes are all like five four five five, Like,
it's not fucking fair. No, they have played nobody pile.
They have played nobody pole. They ain't got the body.
They got the Jimmy's and the jows. But it is
funny to me that George George Roshing, by the way,
was six four.
Speaker 1: Yeah, so he saw this guy and was like, yeah,
Washington was a giant too. Goddamn two sixty though. That's
that's the Bradley Martin and all joke, all beef, all muscle.
That's the whole Bradley Martin thing where he thinks he
can beat up like smaller MMA fighter as a boxer.
He's like, yeah, but I'm two sixty bro.
Speaker 2: In MMA. Yeah, I just got to grab you. Yeah
that for one hundred percent.
Speaker 1: No, dude, No a train fighter would MRK Bradley Martin.
Oh I thought brad was also a fighter. No, he's
just a gym bro.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah fuck him. Yeah he dies. He gets clocked immediately.
Speaker 1: During General mad Anthony Wayne's nighttime assault on the British
fortification at Stony Point, New York along the Hudson River
on July sixteenth, seventeen seventy nine, Francisco was the second
man to burst inside the British fortification, and in the
close quarter hand to hand fighting that ensued, suffered a
nine inch laceration across the stomach, Bleeding profusely, he continued
to fight, capturing the British flag in the process. Credit
for the capture flag was given to a French officer.
Wayne mentions Francisco's heroics in his after action report to
George Washington, and he received a two hundred dollars bonus
for his efforts.
Speaker 2: I think that's probably political, Like you want you want
the French to get some good news back home, Yeah,
get them hyped.
Speaker 1: Also, you want to get it out there to the
Americans that the French are useful.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Yeah, I think that was a political assignment in
terms of who got the flag, Like, hey, buddy, I.
Speaker 1: Know you paid him under the table essentially.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I know, you just got your whole fucking stomach
slashed open. We appreciate it. Gotta give it to the
French guy, just for reasons. We got to make sure
that your open stomach is worth it.
Speaker 1: Hearing that Colonel William Washington was headed on a march
through the Carolinas, Francisco joined him participating in the Battle
of Guilford Courthouse in North Carolina. He reportedly killed eleven
enemy soldiers during the battle, including one who wounded him
severely in the thigh with the banet. So he's catching
it in the thigh a lot, he.
Speaker 2: Is, Well, that's where that's the stabbing hight.
Speaker 1: For everybody else here.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's at thigh level. I'm sorry. Did he kill
eleven people with the broadsword?
Speaker 1: The broadsword or maybe even just his hands?
Speaker 2: Oh Jesus, I think it's gotta be.
Speaker 1: Just crushing people out the mountain rough.
Speaker 2: That's literally the worst scene I've ever seen. Yeah. Man,
he's just so he's just running in with a broadsword
and all these guys who are like, I'm ready to
take on a dude with a musket and a bayonet.
Then you just have William Wallace running in there.
Speaker 1: You have just a behemoth swinging taking a lot of damage. Yeah,
but he just keeps pushing through.
Speaker 2: He's made a meat. He's also a team. How old
is he throughout this? Ye?
Speaker 1: I mean he starts when he's like sixteen.
Speaker 2: Right, so yeah.
Speaker 1: Sixteen, seventeen eighteen.
Speaker 2: That's a bad age. That's a bad age.
Speaker 1: It's a piste off for you to face a giant
kid on trend, right that like you, if.
Speaker 2: You're gonna face a giant, you want him to be
like thirty five. Yeah, you want to have tired knees,
a mind that doesn't think it's like immortal.
Speaker 1: Yeah, indestructible. Yeah, because yeah, his brain is not cut
up to his body.
Speaker 2: No. No, so as far as he knows, he can
just walk in there and start swinging.
Speaker 1: He hasn't reached the age where you, you know, have
a crippling panic attack from your own mortality.
Speaker 2: Yes, so he can't die as far as he knows.
Speaker 1: Possibly, Francisco's most famous feed of strength occurred at the
Battle of Camden, South Carolina, where he noticed the Americans
were leaving behind one of their valuable cannons, so.
Speaker 2: He just picked it up. We whoa, whoa.
Speaker 1: Yep, Francisco picked up the three hundred and fifty pounds
cannon barrel and carried it.
Speaker 2: The Battle of Camden, I believe, if you want some
uh context, is the battle that is portrayed in the
Patriot when uh the like happens outside their house and
then the and then the next day. Lucius Malfoy shows
up and shoots his kid. Yeah, that's the Battle of Campon,
I believe. Now.
Speaker 1: Their stories originally were like, this was an eleven hundred
pound cannon.
Speaker 2: This didn't fucking happen.
Speaker 1: No, it did happen, okay, but they grossly overestimated how
much the cannon weighed. It's roughly like.
Speaker 2: Three hundred fifty pouce.
Speaker 1: Oh okay, yeah, they were saying at first, and sources
will still to this day say eleven hundred pounds. It's like, no,
either way, three hundred fifty pounds is enough either way.
Speaker 2: Again, my putting my forty pound child on my shoulders
today walking up hill fucking killed me.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but again, soft hands doesn't want to camp.
Speaker 2: I don't want to camp, bitch boy, don't want to camp.
Speaker 1: Whereas Backwards had at age forty.
Speaker 2: I'm thirty nine.
Speaker 1: It's coming for you.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's coming. Got a couples.
Speaker 1: Francisco was sent home to Buckingham, Virginia after this to recuperate.
He volunteered to spy on the British Legion who were
operating in the area. How how how terrible spy? Oh god?
Speaker 2: What top? I like a gloom too.
Speaker 1: Needless to say, this fails because British cavalry men immediately
spot him. They surround him at a tavern and ordered
him to be arrested because obviously he has a bit
of a reputation.
Speaker 2: Now, hey, I'm several battles, sound paranoid, but I swear
to God I'll do I believe me. I would never
forget his face. I swear to god.
Speaker 3: That's the same giant that was swinging a broadsword at
me at Camden and I watched him walk away carrying
a fun cannon. How many bloody giants can they be
that that man's not that's the guy he said he's
on our side.
Speaker 2: There's not far fucking giants here. That's the giant. It's
the worst fucking spy idea in human history.
Speaker 1: I wonder if he had a tolerance like Andre the Giant.
He's just smashing beers.
Speaker 2: You gotta think, you gotta think that's been taken down.
That's the equivalent of enlisting like Jackie Robinson to infiltrate
the German High Command.
Speaker 1: Listen. I was told that Hitler was actually more receptive
to Jesse Owens than Fdr. Yeah, I'm sure, I'm sure,
shook Jesse Owen's hand. FDR did not. Yeah, what's that say?
Who's the real villain?
Speaker 2: Who could say? Who could say?
Speaker 1: That's how we get views?
Speaker 2: How would give you his FD? Was Hitler really the
bad guy?
Speaker 1: No, he was the guy in the wheelchair.
Speaker 2: Yeah, this is a cripple.
Speaker 1: It was the guy that got hand jobs from his cousin.
He did do that, and not the cousin he was
married to.
Speaker 2: Different. I mean, but dude, once you once you break.
Speaker 1: The seal on that cousins, you gotta you don't taste
for it.
Speaker 2: You don't kill. It's like sharp It's like a lion
getting a taste for human. Once you get a taste
for cousin, once you pop, just can't stop hop. Yes,
that's it.
Speaker 1: They told him to give over his silver shoe buckles.
Francisco told them to take the buckles themselves. When they
began to seize his shoe buckles, Francisco took a soldier
saber and struck him on the head. The wounded soldier
fired his pistol, grazing Francisco's side. Francisco nearly cut off
the soldier's hand. Another soldier aimed a musca to Francisco,
but it misfired and Francisco abed it from the soldier's hands,
knocked him off his mount and escaped with his horse.
So horse thief.
Speaker 2: Now hang him.
Speaker 1: It's the worst thing you can be.
Speaker 2: Bang them. Hang that poor horse. That horse isn't making
it long.
Speaker 1: No, no, it's a big boy.
Speaker 2: Also, oh my god, you're too big for this ride. Buddy,
there's just a British guy. I assume that British guy
always lost his hand, died like he's just got his
hand like dangling by some viscera.
Speaker 1: And then he stole his horse. How do you explain
that man? It's just a bad day for that guy.
Speaker 2: I mean, maybe don't send only two people to arrest
a giant. Nine guys That might be too little.
Speaker 1: Too took on eleven a battle earlier, right.
Speaker 2: I think you gotta go at least twenty. And also
just kill him. What are you gonna do? Hang him
from a redwood?
Speaker 1: That branch is breaking it. Yeah, you need a bigger branch.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you need a bigger tree, thicker rope. Just kill him.
He's already spying, he's already sentenced to death. Don't bother
with anything else.
Speaker 1: In seventeen eighty one, Francisco was ordered by his commanding
officer to join the Franco American Army participating in the
siege of York Town.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, he's in the big one.
Speaker 1: But he arrived too late to participate in the fighting,
but witnessed the surrender of the besieged British army under
the command of Lord Cornwallace.
Speaker 2: Damn, I mean, if he was there, he was at
some big battles, if he was, if he had been
there for the fighting, though, he walks back with corn
Wallace's head probably on a pike. Yeah, oh well, no,
on his broad sword. He's just bopping.
Speaker 1: It, just taking it like a lollipop.
Speaker 2: And still I actually still can't get over that. They're like,
maybe you should spy. He volunteered for it, the worst Okay,
that's worse. Actually, so a worn pu swire like, hey, what's.
Speaker 1: Worse him wanted to spy or Taco Fall wanted to
be an astronaut?
Speaker 2: Both are equally, Well, what's worth to him? Because he
got it, he got the job. No one stepped in that,
because imagine if Taco Fall was an astronaut.
Speaker 1: Listen, nobody even had to approve him being a spy.
He probably could have just could have just done it.
He's like, I spy you now, Okay, buddy, pat him
on the head. Yeah, you do whatever you want, but
you gotta get on a stool.
Speaker 2: Yeah, climb the stairs.
Speaker 1: Following the end of the American Revolutionary War, Francisco pursued
his basic education. He went to school with younger children
who were fascinated by his stories of war. So it
was kind of a Adam Sandler situation. Yeah, Billy Madison,
Billy Madison.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's like, Peter, tell us again, how you cut
those five guys heads off? That's sweet though, Yeah, I
mean I would want to know that as a child.
Speaker 1: In December seventeen eighty four, Peter married Susannah Anderson of
Cumberland County, Virginia. The Andersons were of social distinction and
owned a plantation called the Mansion. So Peter had come
a long way. He was a Virginia gentleman, a landowner,
and an owner of seven blacks, six horses, and ten
heads of cattle according to the tax records of seventeen
eighty eight. So it goes from he goes from indentured
servant to.
Speaker 2: Slave owner, his owner. Very is a sensitive way to
put that. He owned seven blacks, six horses. That's what
it said, man talking like you, Oh yeah, you could
have prefaced it with like the according to the tax record,
this is what the tax records said.
Speaker 1: I said, according to tax records. He said that last.
I would have said that first, all right, different strucks
for different folks.
Speaker 2: I would have been like, now, this is what the
tax record said. This isn't what I wrote.
Speaker 1: She dies a dysentery in seventeen ninety.
Speaker 2: He split her in half.
Speaker 1: That could have been the case.
Speaker 2: He absolutely.
Speaker 1: Peter and Susannah were the parents of two children, and
in December of seventeen ninety four he marries again to
Catherine Brooke, who was a relative of his first wives.
So he's like, all right, maybe he's in the cousins.
Speaker 2: I mean he's into that family.
Speaker 1: Yeah, certainly he's in the money. He's in which respect.
Speaker 2: Especially Look when you get dropped off on a dock
as a five year old and have to sleep in
a warehouse on a pile of hay, you're gonna marry
as rich as you can and you're gonna stay.
Speaker 1: He's gonna look even goof here at balls. What and
just like fancy parties.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, like a tailor's just like, we don't have enough.
Speaker 1: It's a nightmare.
Speaker 2: Yeah, we don't have enough fabric. Yeah I'm supposed to
do with that. I'm sorry, but I don't know what
to tell you. We have a potato sac yeah, well
I will make shorts. Make shorts for you. We can't
make pants. Yeah, And if you bring me a blanket,
I can make it into a coat.
Speaker 1: During the Richmond Theater fire of eighteen eleven, Peter, who
was in attendance that evening, assisted those fleeing the disastrous fire.
One of the women he rescued stated that he caught
at least thirty people who were jumping from windows and
then carried them to safety.
Speaker 2: Okay, so he does have hands. We need to go back.
I think he could be a basketball player tight end. Yeah, okay,
just throw it up to him. Yep, let me go
get it high point. Let throw it up. He's got it.
Speaker 1: Peter asked that his name be omitted from the lists
of those who aided in rescuing the people from the flames,
saying he had only done what he could have under
the circumstance dances. So he's a humble guy. Okay, wasn't
a gloryhound.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean other than with those kids. Who is
impressing at recess.
Speaker 1: Sometimes nice to I'm press kids, you know.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I agree.
Speaker 1: Like whenever I go to your house, I just tell
my stories to Rory and he's just like, Wow, that's
so much cooler than my dad.
Speaker 2: Oh. I tell him to say that beforehand. I'm like, Hey, Dan,
hasn't a lot going on.
Speaker 1: I don't whatever he says. Just act really excited. Just
hype him up. Yeah, he'll be overjoyed. I'll talk about
on the show. Before her death. Uh, his second wife
in eighteen twenty one, Peter and Catherine then had four
kids of their own, so he had six kids there, damn.
And then he marries another woman by the name of
Mary Grimes West. But prior to this marriage, Peter arranged
a prenup agreement to ensure that he would not be
legally responsible for the widow's debts from her ex husband.
Speaker 2: Hell yeah, so what she's so responsible for it?
Speaker 1: I guess back then you were just responsible for your
dead husband's debts. That sucks.
Speaker 2: You gotta gotta take it from somebody.
Speaker 1: I think you still technically are to this day.
Speaker 2: If you.
Speaker 1: Agree to it verbally, I think they can like trick
you yeah to taking it.
Speaker 2: I mean, there's no world in which, like, if my.
Speaker 1: Wife died an a creditor, cause I'd.
Speaker 2: Be like, uh, yeah, sorry, bro, she's dead. That wasn't
my credit card?
Speaker 1: Suck my dick, not my problem? Yeah, not my debt. Yeah,
I'm a problem.
Speaker 2: It literally blow me? Is my Social Security number on
that account? No? No, my dick can be in your mouth.
Speaker 1: That sounds better for me. Yeah yeah, but.
Speaker 2: Uh, if there's only one social on that account, you
can just airlock my fucking cock. There is no world
in which I'm paying that.
Speaker 1: I don't want to spoil the surprise from the Patreon
episode and one of the moments we saw at the
ren Fair, but we did see a double bj at
a picnic table. Hell, wow, bisexual. Oh that's so a
man and a woman blowing a dude blowing a dude.
That's magical at a picnic table out front of a
Papa John's pizza truck.
Speaker 2: Wait why was it so close to the truck?
Speaker 1: And then the guy went and got a pizza after
he blew the dude.
Speaker 2: Well, yeah, you gotta wash that down with some garlic butter.
Speaker 1: More on that on the Patreon it Oh.
Speaker 2: My god, I can't wait. I can't fucking wait. There
are no rules of the ren fair.
Speaker 1: Free spirits, don't The guy probably thought he was like
smoking something.
Speaker 2: He's just like, dude, what happens in the past stays
in the past.
Speaker 1: In his later years, Francisco was poor and had petitioned
Congress and the Virginia legislation How for a pension?
Speaker 2: How was he poor?
Speaker 1: His women kept dying and he kept having a cell
l I mean, he had a bunch of kids too.
I guess I don't think the families he married into
liked him.
Speaker 2: I think it's it's also really easy to go pour
back then I feel like you get one bad cry.
Speaker 1: George Washington almost went poor.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but that was his ice cream addiction.
Speaker 1: Yeah, sweet tooth really crippled you. Well, the slaves had
the sweet sweet teeth. No, he needed the slave teeth
because he ate the ice cream, because the ice cream.
Speaker 2: That would actually be the ultimate insult to injury on
those slaves is that Washington only needed new teeth because
he couldn't stop eating ice cream.
Speaker 1: His ice cream white supremacy.
Speaker 2: It couldn't eat. Yes, yeah, to answer your question, Yes.
Speaker 1: That's actually a legitimate thing that people brought up with
milk because white people digest milk better.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's where we're at now. God damn it, I can't.
Speaker 1: That's actually what started, uh a lot of the issues
with Vinlen when the Vikings went over. Yeah, and they
shared milk, yeah with the natives. They poisonous.
Speaker 2: Yeah, what the fuck is this?
Speaker 1: Yeah, so there's some backstory too, sure.
Speaker 2: Well that it should is alcohol also white supremacy.
Speaker 1: We handle it better than Asians.
Speaker 2: Than Asians at least, yeah, East Asians. I don't know
about South Asians.
Speaker 1: They get blush.
Speaker 2: We should stop drinking to not be racist. I will
never do that. If, like, literally, if I'm drinking a
beer and someone's like, do you know that's white supremacy,
I'd be like, that's you can just call these racists
as you want. At this point, I don't care. You're
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Speaker 1: He spent the last three years of his life working
as a sergeant at arms at the Virginia State Senate.
He died of appendicitis on January sixteenth, eighteen thirty one,
and he was buried with a full military with full
military honors in the Chaco Hill Cemetery in Richmond. The
Virginia State Legislator adjourned for the day and many legislators
attended his funeral.
Speaker 2: Good he's a goddamn hero.
Speaker 1: His famous broadsword was presented by his daughter to the
Virginia Historical Society. However, that weapon has since disappeared.
Speaker 2: From the museum. Yeah, what is the lou people are stealing?
It could have been the goddamn museum.
Speaker 1: I would want to steal that sword.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I would do. How do you lose how long
was it? Six feet?
Speaker 1: A six foot sword?
Speaker 2: How do you lose a six foot broadsword? You certainly
put it in the mail. You can't throw it away.
Maybe the Civil War did it, That would be my
one guess.
Speaker 1: It got it melted, it down.
Speaker 2: Got bombed or looted or melted.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Stonewall Jackson was just carrying his sword into battle.
Speaker 2: I could see some tryhard Confederate trying to do that.
Certainly Jefferson. He was a Virginian. I just wanted to
hang it. Yeah, I could see the Civil War. I mean,
you know, Richmond got bombed to fuck, not bombed a fuck,
but it got fucked up in Civil War. Not quite
Bertolian in World War Two. But I could see. I
could see Shick get lost.
Speaker 1: Yeah. And that's the story of the Virginia Giant. Pedro,
don't call me Peter Francisco. What did you learn today?
Speaker 2: Uh well, obviously all of this didn't know anything about
this guy, but.
Speaker 1: I learned sad veterans story. Though you know, he had
to beg for his pension.
Speaker 2: That sounds like a classic veterans story.
Speaker 1: That's what I'm saying. You know, tell is oldest town. Yeah,
we don't take care of our veterans.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I learned a that. Again, if you're going to
fight a giant, a teenage giant is the worst one
to fight because they have no regard for themselves at all,
like they will do their go full berserker mode.
Speaker 1: You don't want to fight a teenager in general.
Speaker 2: No, No, And because I mean there's it's lose lose, Yeah,
what do you The best case scenario is you beat up.
Speaker 1: A teenager, right, not not a cool story. No, In fact,
a lot of state's illegal.
Speaker 2: Yeah. I mean, if they assault you, I guess first,
but they gotta throw the first punch and you might
be done by that point.
Speaker 1: Getting knocked out by a sixteen year old. That's embarrassing.
Speaker 2: Yeah. The other thing I learned that's how your wife
leaves you. Well, legally she would have to leave me
for the sixteen year old, and that's in his riot. Yeah,
he would have earned it at that point, so fair enough,
look out, Rory. If you punch me out, you have
to marry your mom. The other thing I learned is
just that I don't know how good our spy game was.
It was early on. It's just the worst spy you
could possibly pick.
Speaker 1: Listen, John Jay probably didn't approve that.
Speaker 2: Can't imagine, can't imagine, Hey, we gotta do spy what
it's the giant, the one that everyone recognizes on the battlefield.
Speaker 1: Spy shagged me.
Speaker 2: Just the last person you would was by her guards.
Speaker 1: He puts on like a British powdered way. Yeah, kick George,
say anything secret today?
Speaker 2: What she'd have brooked? It beheaded my friend and just
kept screaming your blood on your face and yeah, someone
is Sasha Belly and he just kept calling, don't be
that's a different giant. Are like King George? Hey, what
corn Wallace say? We're doing to go tomorrow? A secret attack?
Was that what it was? Yeah, we're gonna call the cavalry.
Don't think you hear you say? Yeah, that's what I
learned today.
Speaker 1: Who's today's hitler?
Speaker 2: Uh? Whoever takes care of veterans in America? Yeah? Yeah,
it's never good. No. He goes from rich to as
poor as you could possibly be, essentially his slave to slave,
so even poorer to whatever soldier or whatever, to kind
of rich again, and then loses it and poor again.
Speaker 1: I'd be like that man, it's a roller coaster.
Speaker 2: Oh, I don't believe.
Speaker 1: I should model my life after this man.
Speaker 2: I don't believe the theory that his family was protecting him,
considering that they never followed up.
Speaker 1: Never checked in. Yeah, what happened? I guess the pirates,
you know, they just got tired of a child.
Speaker 2: They're like, yeah, God, don't drop him off. The poor
take to Virginia. We got a bunch of molasses we
got to take there. Anyway, Just Jesus Christ, this kid sucks.
Speaker 1: I can't think of a worse time on a Pirate
bot than a five year.
Speaker 2: Old whining constantly. It's like all right here, yeah, but
here's the thing of their pirates. They're probably just beating
the shit out of him until he shuts the fuck up.
Speaker 1: Pirates have codes. I don't think they're beating up five
year olds.
Speaker 2: I think they are. I think they are.
Speaker 1: You getta lash and when you're seven, not five, I.
Speaker 2: Think there's not they're slapping them across the face.
Speaker 1: Yeah, okay, fair enough, fair enough. Anyway, that's our episode
for today. Thank you for tuning in love you guess.
Make sure to check out again in the Patreon for
that very fair episode, very special episode coming on. I
think that'll drop either you're gonna if you're here on
this Monday today or tomorrow and on Tuesday.
Speaker 2: Yeah, don't do the same day, dude.
Speaker 1: Yeah, we'll drop a Tuesday then. Okay, so you'll have
bonus episode Tuesday, your regular schedule program Wednesday Friday.
Speaker 2: As well as the twenty dollars tiers sports episode.
Speaker 1: Sports episode will also be Tuesday. Yeah, yeah, yeah, oh yeah.
We should probably tell people that we do a sports show.
People always ask us in my DMS, like, hey, you
and rub Sho do a sports show. Guess what we do?
Speaker 2: We do do it? We do it on the upper tier. Yeah,
so mostly collegeable related.
Speaker 1: Right now that we talk of the sports, well, you know,
we're making it pretty well rounded.
Speaker 2: I think we need to get into bad. I've been
watching a lot of good college basketball games lately as well.
You know NFL is going on too. Of course, weren't
actually cares NFL. We've been talking obviously, finished up baseball. Oh,
there is another baseball topic we need to.
Speaker 1: Hot stoves gonna come up soon. What the hot stoves?
Coming up soon?
Speaker 2: But there is another base topic we do need to
talk about on that Patreon episode, which is yeah, well
just the gamble holster, the MLB gambling. More details came
out on the Guardians players.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's prevalent everywhere. UFC dealing with it right now.
Speaker 2: Yeah no, but like I will just leave it to that.
You probably haven't seen the details because you're camping all weekend.
It's bad and they were pitching.
Speaker 1: We'll argue about it on Tuesday. Okay, Well, but we
love you guys. Make sure we're checking our YouTube too.
Subscribe sub to that. Sub subscribe to the YouTube. Also
make sure you get the notifications when new episodes come out.
I think you just got to hit the bell. Yes,
put notifications on. I don't know why it doesn't default
to that. It's a constant battle with the algorithm. Constant,
but we're trying.
Speaker 2: Oh, we should appease the algorithm.
Speaker 1: Jews, you said it. Yeah, we did it, ladies and gentlemen,
we did it.
Speaker 2: Anyway.
Speaker 1: Thanks for tuning in. We love you for our Fox.
I'm Damna Jester and you just got Saucer