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Speaker 1: Rob, what's the best way to support this podcast?

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Speaker 2: Going to patreon dot com slash Softcore History and subscribing

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to our patreon where for five dollars a month you

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will get eight extra episodes per month, plus a two

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year and counting back catalog, All Evergreen, all fun, all History.

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Check it out. Dan, you know what I'm tired of

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talking about. I'm tired of talking about presidents who almost

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got killed. And you know what I want to talk

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about instead, presidents that did the killing. I want to

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talk about presidents who snatched lives, Presidents who met somebody

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and decided I'm taking that person off of this earth.

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So today we are talking about the presidents of the

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United States that we know for sure killed somebody, not

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ordered them to die, not press the button, not ordered

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a drone strike or whatever. I'm talking to president who

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took a life with their hands. Some you will not

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be surprised by, some you probably know, and some you

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had no idea. Welcome to soft Core History. What is up?

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Welcome back to soft Core History. I am your host

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for the week, Rob Fox, joined as always by Dan

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Regester and special returning guests. Really like our second or

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third most regular at this point, Gabby Monte Mayor, Hello,

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what's going on?

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Speaker 3: Hi?

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Speaker 2: Thanks for having me, Welcome back. We're happy you're here.

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Speaker 3: I'm happy here.

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Speaker 2: We're sorry we're a day late. I have a family.

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Speaker 1: It's Rob's fault.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, typical, just loving on my children.

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Speaker 1: Get us to take a vacation. Sort of kind of bullshit.

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Speaker 2: Kind of in a way. It was mostly like most

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of it was just traveling with Joe, like not being

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at the end destination, but like getting there. I'm sorry

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you get the board early. I did have a beer

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on the plane. I did get the board early, which

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was sweet. But I did have a beer on the plane.

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It was like noon, and my wife was like, what

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are you doing. You're drinking and I was just like,

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this is a fucking nightmare.

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Speaker 3: It's not a vacation for you if you have your

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kids with you.

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Speaker 2: It's like not, it's playing a game. It's exactly. So

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it's said, it's like, no, it's not a vacation, it's

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a trip. It's a trip. Yeah, Like difference. Yeah, Like

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it's like it's like saying the Oregon Trails a vacation,

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Like oh how fun?

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Speaker 3: Like wow, you get to see new things, beautiful landscapes, dysentery,

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waterways not previously seen.

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Speaker 2: I mean there's diarrhea involved usually always Yeah, whatever dog

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shit they eat at the airport or on vacation or whatever.

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So yeah, we're daylight because I was on a mini

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vacation with the fam. They're still gone. So I'm just

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gonna bachelor it up this week.

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Speaker 1: What's up?

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Speaker 2: Just gonna go nuts, dude.

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Speaker 1: You're gonna get so many prostitutes.

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Speaker 2: Hell yeah, it's gonna be sweet. Dripping Springs has a

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great brothel, so I hear.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's why they call it Dripping Springs because the ladies.

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Speaker 2: Are wet, wet vaginas dripping. They're so wet. Boo, welcome

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to softcore history.

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Speaker 1: I mean, looking at that shirtless photo of you from vacation,

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they might.

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Speaker 2: Be you have the most just backhanded compliment about.

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Speaker 3: He's just shocked you're not like a fat slob.

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Speaker 2: I like it is that I'm not a complete bag

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of milk.

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Speaker 3: Honestly, we're all shocked.

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Speaker 2: My fucking mind it tight.

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Speaker 1: You drink alcohol, eat like you eat toritles every day.

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That's all you live off of.

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Speaker 2: I just eat Chick fil A. But that's that's a

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different story. Yeah, your body's a dump long day. You

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know how many fucking calories you burn when you fucking

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have chase around two toddlers like I don't sit down

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like I'm just and actually what's worse is you do

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sit down than you immediately after you get back up.

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You're carrying someone constantly. Half the time you're fucking carrying them,

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they don't even want to be in your arms. So

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imagine like carrying a forty pound package that doesn't want

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to be carried. Me there, I'm meaning clean.

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Speaker 1: I'm going to the gym every day, and really the

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results aren't much better, So I'm just gonna drink.

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Speaker 2: Fuck it, Yeah, drink. It doesn't matter anymore. How have

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you not already learned that this isn't really particular to you.

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This is for both of us in different ways, like

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for this podcast, for example, everything you try hard at

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isn't worth it, and you won't get the results you deserve.

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Speaker 1: In fact, you'll be made fun of.

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Speaker 3: Give up.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, just give up, give up, give up.

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Speaker 1: That's kind of the lesson you should take from this podcast.

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Whether or not you learn anything else is unimportant.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, be like history will forget you.

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Speaker 1: You mean zero in the grand scheme of things. No, like,

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you're not taking over a country. That's really all great

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men are really known for conquering.

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Speaker 2: Even most people who take over countries, you don't get remembered.

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You think the Dureau is going to be remembered by anyone? No,

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he'll be forgotten in Venezuela one hundred years.

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Speaker 1: And how many explorers do we know? Like two right

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out of like Columbus and Magellan.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean even like, do you know Constant Leone is? Yeah, okay,

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all right, so I'm trying to think Pizarro would be

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another one those guys. Yeah, all right, that's fair. Five.

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Which one's Lewis, which one's Clark?

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Speaker 3: Who cares?

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Speaker 2: They're the same, they're the same, Yeah.

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Speaker 3: Penn and Teller. I don't remember which is the one

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that doesn't talk? Is it Teller? Is that why? It's funny.

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Speaker 1: I think that's the joke. Yeah, but I have no idea.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't know. I couldn't tell you. That's why. Yeah,

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if you're a duo, you're you just become the duo

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and if.

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Speaker 1: You split up, it's tragic. Let's don't do that. If

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you have a good thing going with another person.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, Hollano, continue that.

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Speaker 2: But also, by the way, this is the second time

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in like two weeks you've said this about one of

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your podcast co host bodies, because remember last week we

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were like, goddamn, Jake's lost a lot of weight.

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Speaker 1: Well he's working the farms.

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Speaker 3: Just work in the field.

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Speaker 2: Well he's good.

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Speaker 1: We don't know. We don't talk to him, will we

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ever check in? He turned on us.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, that's true.

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Speaker 2: He's absolutely dead to us. And speaking of yeah, we do.

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But speaking of dead, let's get into this week's topic. Today.

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I thought as I was writing, everyone was thinking of

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topics or whatever. I was like, tired. I'm tired of

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hearing about people trying to kill presidents. I'm sick of it.

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I'm over it. Who can't get over it? I'm over it.

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Speaker 1: I want people to bring other presidents alive.

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Speaker 2: That president or yeah, is resuscitating dead presidents. But we're

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gonna do the next best thing. Instead of talking about

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presidents who've been killed or almost killed, we're going to

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talk about presidents who have killed. Murderous presidents, murderous presidents,

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presidents with bodies. Now every president pretty much certainly posts

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World War two, probably post Civil War or from Lincoln on,

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they've got bodies on their.

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Speaker 1: Hands, right, we do, especially like a Kennedy.

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Speaker 2: Uh well, I'll get to that in a second. But

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every president, you know, whether it's removing Indians from land

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or droning some terrorists, whatever, it is like they're all

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ordered deaths, right, But how many have taken lives with

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their own fucking hands. That's what we're here to talk

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about today.

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Speaker 3: Incredible topic.

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Speaker 2: Flying a plane doesn't count? Yes?

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Speaker 1: Is that your own fucking hands?

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Speaker 2: Close enough? Man?

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Speaker 1: All right, seems like we're giving participation trophies.

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Speaker 2: Now what you just mentioned Kennedy, he was piloting a boat.

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I know, how's that any different?

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Speaker 3: It's not as long as you're aware of your flawed logical.

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Speaker 1: I'm not even making that argument. I'm saying, what are

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we counting as a as a kill?

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Speaker 2: If you're pulling a trigger or something along those lines

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and it directly leads to a death.

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Speaker 3: So it's basically like you can't but you ordered someone

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else to do it. It's like you did it through

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your actions or through the vehicle that you're controlling with

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your app Yes you're.

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Speaker 2: Responsible, Yes, you are directly responsible for it.

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Speaker 1: What about other people that gerald Ford merked on the

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football fields.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, anyone that died of CTE is long term gerald

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gerald Ford's blood is Jerald Ford's blood on his hands

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with those people. Okay, just double checking, so probably several.

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I mean the Big Ten is littered with the bones

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of gerald Ford's victims. He played Michigan or played Michigan football.

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Speaker 3: What position did he play?

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Speaker 2: He's a running backer?

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Speaker 1: No, he was a center. He was a center. He

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chose to go to Michigan over playing for the Green

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Bay Packers.

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Speaker 2: Oh. Center, actually, uh, here's probably where he did most

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of his damage. Center and a linebacker.

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Speaker 1: Interesting, two way.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, don't make him like they used to. Dude, he

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got two natties in Michigan.

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Speaker 1: Was good.

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Speaker 2: Yeah.

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Speaker 1: Fuck, he made the right decision in the NFL. He

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skipped the NFL. He was like, the NFL was a

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joke back then.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it was.

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Speaker 3: It was like a league for bone Okay, yeah, like

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you were like, it's better, it was better to go

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play college.

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Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, I'm trying to think it was like more prestigious.

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Speaker 3: And he got a college education and became president.

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Speaker 2: But he even he even turned down the NFL.

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Speaker 3: After college oh yeah, what didn't we do after college?

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Speaker 2: I don't remember.

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Speaker 1: Well, you know, most collegiate assets professional and something other

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than sports.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, even if they could go pro in sports back then,

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you didn't want to basketball and football back then. No,

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that's like literally you have to have three jobs.

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Speaker 3: Like a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader.

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Speaker 2: Yes, yeah, Dallas Cowboys used to get paid with Dallas

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Cowboys cheerleaders get paid crime criminal cheerleaders make like ten

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grand a year.

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Speaker 3: It's great, like no money, it's so sad.

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Speaker 2: For the time commitment too. It's yeah, god damn it,

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we're paying you an exposure, exposure for what you make. You.

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The average Dallas Cowboy cheerleader Instagram following is ten k.

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Speaker 3: Yeah, it's not because I watched the show and I

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was like looking them all up and like most like

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a couple of them have over fifty. But it's like nothing, Jerry, like,

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I feel like they probably can't do brand news while

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they're associated with.

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Speaker 2: DCC, but you yeah, because they're like at the Dallas Cowboys. Yeah,

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and then we have standards.

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Speaker 3: Yoh, Charlotte Jones, what a pitch?

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Speaker 2: Is that? The head?

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Speaker 3: That's the Jerry Jones's daughter who's like, she's the head

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and she's like, they don't do this for the money.

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They do this for the prestige of being a d

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c C. And it's like, but also pay these poor girls.

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They have no other skills.

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Speaker 2: No one, I mean no other league makes more money.

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Speaker 3: I mean like just be like and if you buy

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a Dallas Cowboys cheerleader popsicle, then that goes like if

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you were to sell one concession, that would be like,

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that's the DCC cheerleader.

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Speaker 1: Like they should have the Amazon affiliate links in their

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bios and that's what they get.

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Speaker 3: They can't even do only fans. They can't do anything.

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Speaker 1: Oh, you can't even profit on only fans.

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Speaker 3: No, because you can't be like, you can't be doing

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things while you're a DC.

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Speaker 2: Why yeah, when you retire, former Dallas Boys cheerleader doesn't

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have the.

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Speaker 3: Same ring to it. If you can't if you can't

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do it in the uniforms, what.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you don't get to keep the imagine that video

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in the uniform.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, people pay for that. Do you know how many

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just filthy, disgusting Cowboys fans would because there's only two cheerleaders?

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Oh yeah, you you would, You I'm an Eagles fan.

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Take down an enemy's cheerleader, well, I mean, you'd be

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taking down yourself to a cheerleader. It's the same thing.

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In my head. It's fair.

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Speaker 1: I paint the picture so vivid that when I'm cranking it, Yeah,

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she feels like I'm in the scene, and maybe she

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feels it.

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Speaker 3: You're Eagles as you finish.

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Speaker 2: Go, birds fly, Eagles fly. Yeah, boom boom boom boom

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boom boom boom fly.

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Speaker 1: I'm already done.

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Speaker 2: She's that guy. Wow. But yeah, So we we're talking

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about presidents who have specifically killed someone. So there have

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been forty five men in the office. There's forty seven

257
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or no, there's Yeah, there's been forty five men in

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the office, has been for forty six presidents, because Garfield

259
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served twice non consecutively. Out of the forty five men,

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how many do you think caught.

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Speaker 1: A body was at least I mean, I can just

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see the math right now, right Washington.

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Speaker 2: For sure, Okay, Cafton for sure.

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Speaker 1: Jefferson you think, Yeah, I don't know. I don't think

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Jefferson has.

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Speaker 3: To abortions count.

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Speaker 1: Yes, all right, so Jefferson, Yeah, it depends who you ask.

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Speaker 2: Yeah, it depends on the trimster.

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Speaker 1: The first couple besides Washington are nerds, so soft tans.

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I don't know if Monroe ever got into.

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Speaker 2: Like a duel.

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Speaker 1: Give me a Quincy number. Definitely, I mean Jackson for sure.

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Speaker 2: No, Jackson did. We'll talk about too.

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Speaker 1: And then Tyler.

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Speaker 3: So you think it's less than twenty.

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Speaker 1: It's probably I would say twelve.

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Speaker 2: It's good, guess. I believe the count is potentially eleven. Wow,

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there's some that are like there's only a few we

279
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know for sure for sure, and then there's many others

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that were like they had to have like it's almost

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it's almost impossible.

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Speaker 3: It's like implausible that they did it, like it makes

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more sense to have killed somebody than to not.

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Speaker 2: And all those believe it or not.

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Speaker 1: I'm sorry.

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Speaker 2: No, there's three we know for sure for sure. I'm

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not going to spoil the third, my favorite one. I mean,

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Grant has a body, but he we don't know for

289
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sure for sure. Yes we do, we are pot we're

290
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pretty positive and like he does. But there's three that

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are like fully one hundred documented. I killed that guy, Washington, Jackson, Grant, Okay,

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well we'll get it. Those are the three for sure. No,

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we'll get it. We'll talk talk well. Tyler too.

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Speaker 1: Tyler for sure has bodies.

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Speaker 2: We'll talk about it, all right. It's almost like the.

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Speaker 3: Uh.

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Speaker 2: First up is our nation's founder, George Washington. Now George

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wasn't gritten as slave teeth in the in the American Revolution,

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but before the American Revolution, he was a colonial officer,

300
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a provincial officer, I think they called it in the

301
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British Army. In the French and Indian War, the Seven

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Years War as we like to call it on the show,

303
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the First World.

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Speaker 1: War, tech some scalps.

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Speaker 2: Sort of. I mean they're Indians on both sides of

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the conflict. In fact, he in this battle that we're

307
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going to talk about that he probably got his body at.

308
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The Indians were on his side. Even though it was

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called the French and Indian War in the Americas because

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it was the French and Indians. The Indians largely allied

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with the French against the British, but the British did

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have some native allies as well.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, all the natives weren't just like buddy.

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Speaker 3: Buddy wait, I guess so murder counts in the context

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of warlike.

316
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Speaker 2: Even if yeah, if he killed someone on a battle,

317
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what else would it mean? Like most of these guys

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got their kills.

319
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Speaker 3: I'm imagining like drunk driving and you hit a pedestrian,

320
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or like like a revenge killing, or like a woman

321
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like you know, beating his first wife to death or something,

322
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the old fashioned murder, you know, the murder with the

323
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murder with you know, backbone.

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Speaker 2: How many women put out because Kennedy just.

325
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Speaker 3: We'll never know, probably several.

326
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Speaker 2: If Ted Kennedy had won his race, I think he

327
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ran he primary Jimmy Carter when Jimmy Carter was the

328
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incumbent because Carter was so unpopular, And if Ted Kennedy

329
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had won and then won the election against Reagan, which

330
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probably unlikely, let's just say he did, then we get

331
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like the most murdery of all the murders. Yeah, because

332
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Ted Kennedy drowned lady I know, chapiquittic, but he didn't win.

333
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Speaker 1: They straight up and ripped.

334
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Speaker 2: It doesn't count. They did. I love that.

335
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Speaker 1: It's like, Wow, guys really on the nose.

336
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Speaker 2: Well, except instead of a chick, it was like an

337
00:16:08,000 --> 00:16:11,440
idiot bus boy or whatever who gave him coke, which

338
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like he got in the car with him.

339
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Speaker 1: If you're valeting cars, you know the risk of your

340
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brish ask clients.

341
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Speaker 2: You know, you know, Dan, I know you're.

342
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Speaker 1: Florida at a Disney World resort for pores.

343
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Speaker 3: With like a Lakinto or something like.

344
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Speaker 1: It was the World Center Marriott. But do not get

345
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it twisted. It was an awful hotel.

346
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Speaker 2: Yeah.

347
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Speaker 1: It was where people saved up for five years and

348
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pinched every penny to get there.

349
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Speaker 3: And they like put it on this debit card, but

350
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I'm gonna pay cash.

351
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Speaker 1: And I didn't even get to drive cool cars.

352
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Speaker 2: It was mini bands.

353
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Speaker 3: That's the only point. That's the only reason.

354
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Speaker 2: To do it. It's the type of vacation that I've

355
00:16:49,279 --> 00:16:52,000
been on those certainly when it's like you see other

356
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kids buying whatever they want.

357
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Speaker 3: Oh yeah, like at the at the gift.

358
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Speaker 2: Gift shops and parents to shove you past like we're

359
00:17:00,919 --> 00:17:01,720
not getting don't.

360
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Speaker 3: Look, don't even think about it, Like you'll get in

361
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trouble for asking.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I split tips.

363
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Speaker 2: I was. I was with my grandkids, or with my

364
00:17:09,119 --> 00:17:12,240
kids and their grandpa, so grand he was going doing

365
00:17:12,279 --> 00:17:14,519
Grandpa ship buying them were at the we're at this

366
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like mall up in Dallas, and like they went into

367
00:17:17,079 --> 00:17:21,200
the Craola store, like while other kids were just windows shopping.

368
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My father in law was just buying them whatever. I know.

369
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But I was just like to the kids outside, I

370
00:17:28,640 --> 00:17:30,640
was just like, I'm sorry, I'm so sorry.

371
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Speaker 3: Sorry, you're not rich.

372
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Speaker 2: No, I'm like, I know how you feel. I get it.

373
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These kids are pieces of this ship.

374
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Speaker 3: That's that's what grandparents are for, exactly. Parents are to

375
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say no, grandparents are to.

376
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Speaker 2: Say, yeah, all the other kids were there with their parents. Yeah,

377
00:17:45,160 --> 00:17:47,599
you need like old guy, he's gonna do whatever. That's

378
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what you do.

379
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Speaker 3: That's nice.

380
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Speaker 2: So Washington, this is the battle that some say kicked

381
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off the Seven Years War, which, like I said, is

382
00:17:57,640 --> 00:18:01,119
arguably the technically the first World War human history. It

383
00:18:01,240 --> 00:18:06,240
was the Battle of Jamonville Glen. This battle took place

384
00:18:06,720 --> 00:18:09,680
in this battle. It was a kind of a rough way,

385
00:18:09,759 --> 00:18:14,319
like a generous way to say it. Somewhere what skirmish,

386
00:18:14,599 --> 00:18:18,240
very much a skirmish. It was in southwestern Pennsylvania. Almost

387
00:18:18,279 --> 00:18:20,839
more of a rumble. Also, maybe a slaughter would be

388
00:18:20,839 --> 00:18:21,480
a good way to put it.

389
00:18:21,559 --> 00:18:21,960
Speaker 3: Yikes.

390
00:18:22,240 --> 00:18:26,920
Speaker 2: Fifty two British colonial soldiers and Indians commanded by Washington

391
00:18:27,599 --> 00:18:33,880
ambushed and slaughtered like thirty five French guys as they slept.

392
00:18:34,680 --> 00:18:36,160
Speaker 3: They slept kind of gnarly.

393
00:18:36,200 --> 00:18:38,240
Speaker 2: Well they woke. I mean the first couple died sleeping there,

394
00:18:38,400 --> 00:18:40,039
just woke up the dream.

395
00:18:40,240 --> 00:18:41,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, unless you're a heavy sleeper.

396
00:18:42,079 --> 00:18:43,039
Speaker 3: I'm a heavy sleeper.

397
00:18:43,400 --> 00:18:46,240
Speaker 2: Absolutely. I believe someone else had just five more minutes

398
00:18:46,680 --> 00:18:48,720
go kill them. It can't be that many.

399
00:18:49,039 --> 00:18:51,119
Speaker 3: Just don't miss, just don't miss.

400
00:18:51,519 --> 00:18:54,359
Speaker 2: There's definitely not seventeen more of them than us. It's fine.

401
00:18:55,519 --> 00:18:59,599
The battle lasted fifteen minutes, hikes, and in fact.

402
00:19:00,559 --> 00:19:01,359
Speaker 3: That's a pillaging.

403
00:19:02,599 --> 00:19:04,359
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, they fucked him up. It was a complete ambush.

404
00:19:04,680 --> 00:19:10,400
Washington might not have even caught his body during the battle.

405
00:19:13,160 --> 00:19:15,039
Some of these French guys got a little bit war

406
00:19:15,119 --> 00:19:20,039
crimed there, may or may not. So they captured, tortured,

407
00:19:20,200 --> 00:19:24,920
maybe got a little lippy executed after surrendering type of situations.

408
00:19:25,000 --> 00:19:26,960
Speaker 3: So maybe it wasn't a cherry tree he chopped down,

409
00:19:26,960 --> 00:19:28,039
but a French guy's.

410
00:19:27,839 --> 00:19:31,359
Speaker 2: Head, Yeah, pretty much. They did say that the There

411
00:19:31,359 --> 00:19:36,079
were varying reports of how the command, the French commander died.

412
00:19:36,599 --> 00:19:39,440
I think someone maybe the Indians claimed I think it

413
00:19:39,480 --> 00:19:41,319
was the Indians that were on the British. I'd claim

414
00:19:41,359 --> 00:19:44,000
that a musket he got a musketball to the head

415
00:19:44,240 --> 00:19:46,400
as he was trying to surrender. And then the British

416
00:19:46,480 --> 00:19:49,119
claimed that one of the Indians, fucking tomahawked him as

417
00:19:49,119 --> 00:19:53,000
he was trying to talk to them or something was

418
00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:57,640
Washington he got a scalp. So Washington's reports on the

419
00:19:57,680 --> 00:20:06,680
battle were always extreme, brief and lacking in detail. M Leader, Yeah,

420
00:20:06,720 --> 00:20:10,039
they were just like, we found him, we attacked, we

421
00:20:10,119 --> 00:20:11,000
won this.

422
00:20:11,119 --> 00:20:13,480
Speaker 3: Many didn't know no numbers even.

423
00:20:13,359 --> 00:20:15,759
Speaker 2: I think they were like there might have been numbers,

424
00:20:15,799 --> 00:20:17,920
but it was really just like you don't need the detail.

425
00:20:18,279 --> 00:20:21,400
Speaker 3: We won, just know that it was a stuck success

426
00:20:22,079 --> 00:20:22,599
thumbs up.

427
00:20:22,799 --> 00:20:25,279
Speaker 2: And it was, like I said, it was a small battle.

428
00:20:25,400 --> 00:20:28,720
It was a tightly tight quarters ish battle because they

429
00:20:29,079 --> 00:20:31,160
fired and went into the camp and stuff like that,

430
00:20:31,240 --> 00:20:35,039
and then obviously they did some war crimey stuff afterwards.

431
00:20:35,200 --> 00:20:38,839
Washington actually wrote a leather letter to his brother after

432
00:20:38,880 --> 00:20:42,839
the battle, which kind of actually it's a little it's

433
00:20:42,839 --> 00:20:45,640
a little not sick, but it's a little like, all right,

434
00:20:45,640 --> 00:20:47,839
this guy wants to get some well, you'll never believe,

435
00:20:48,759 --> 00:20:51,160
kind of like it's against some type of letter, he said,

436
00:20:51,200 --> 00:20:54,200
he wrote this is Forbadeim what he said. I can

437
00:20:54,279 --> 00:20:58,480
with truth assure you I heard bullets whistle, and believe me,

438
00:20:58,720 --> 00:21:00,680
there was something charming in the sound.

439
00:21:03,599 --> 00:21:04,839
Speaker 3: Charming in the sound.

440
00:21:06,480 --> 00:21:07,920
Speaker 2: I wanted want he wanted to get some.

441
00:21:10,039 --> 00:21:13,440
Speaker 3: Imagine the smell of like you're in an army camp,

442
00:21:13,480 --> 00:21:16,039
like obviously it doesn't even smell good before, like no

443
00:21:16,160 --> 00:21:19,799
air conditioning, everyone's hots, much of dudes that don't shower, like, yeah,

444
00:21:19,960 --> 00:21:20,599
what's up here?

445
00:21:21,759 --> 00:21:24,720
Speaker 2: Let me check it was? I mean, usually you were

446
00:21:24,759 --> 00:21:26,599
only fighting in the spring and summer.

447
00:21:27,240 --> 00:21:30,960
Speaker 3: And then like hot blood death and probably like excrement.

448
00:21:31,279 --> 00:21:35,960
Speaker 2: Probably beautiful spring day in Pennsylvania, near Pittsburgh.

449
00:21:36,039 --> 00:21:37,680
Speaker 3: It was until.

450
00:21:39,359 --> 00:21:42,279
Speaker 2: Uh, well it didn't help that. I mean, I guess

451
00:21:41,839 --> 00:21:44,880
the smell of the French guys just being smelling French

452
00:21:44,920 --> 00:21:47,200
guys and then pooping their pants when they were there,

453
00:21:47,559 --> 00:21:51,440
but they left, I guess before the corpses started rotting,

454
00:21:51,480 --> 00:21:54,200
but they did neglect to bury them also just left

455
00:21:54,240 --> 00:21:58,799
them out there to rot. So that is probably that

456
00:21:58,960 --> 00:22:02,519
Washington was in other engagements, but that is probably where

457
00:22:03,240 --> 00:22:09,160
he caught a body. If I had to maybe a

458
00:22:09,200 --> 00:22:11,240
few straight execution style.

459
00:22:11,680 --> 00:22:14,519
Speaker 3: You don't know the musket though, So it's like, well,

460
00:22:14,519 --> 00:22:14,880
he would have.

461
00:22:14,880 --> 00:22:18,279
Speaker 2: Been sword and pistol because he was an officer, so

462
00:22:18,640 --> 00:22:21,680
is the regulars, the regular troops or colonials whatever, they

463
00:22:21,720 --> 00:22:24,319
would have had the muskets. Washington would have been rocking

464
00:22:24,359 --> 00:22:28,039
a sword, maybe a flint lock pistol. Oh dude, if

465
00:22:28,039 --> 00:22:31,720
he took off a head with a sword, yeah, but

466
00:22:31,799 --> 00:22:34,839
agains my king right there. They there were several accounts

467
00:22:34,839 --> 00:22:37,759
that said people were killed. After the fact, no one

468
00:22:37,880 --> 00:22:40,680
really wanted to talk about who was killing, who did

469
00:22:40,720 --> 00:22:41,319
any of the kills.

470
00:22:41,319 --> 00:22:42,200
Speaker 1: Also, that's terrifying.

471
00:22:42,240 --> 00:22:46,759
Speaker 2: He's a giant ginger. He's six or four for red

472
00:22:46,759 --> 00:22:49,799
hair for the tiny fucking humongous.

473
00:22:49,400 --> 00:22:51,519
Speaker 3: I mean for even now, he's pretty big. But yeah,

474
00:22:51,680 --> 00:22:53,359
that for the time, if everyone else is like five

475
00:22:53,400 --> 00:22:53,799
eight on.

476
00:22:53,799 --> 00:22:58,960
Speaker 2: Average, No, they're like five four, Yeah, because like people

477
00:22:59,119 --> 00:23:01,039
kind of like my off rip on Napoleon.

478
00:23:01,119 --> 00:23:04,079
Speaker 1: But apparently five six isn't that small.

479
00:23:04,240 --> 00:23:06,920
Speaker 2: It was an average height for the time, yeah, which

480
00:23:06,960 --> 00:23:09,079
I believe it. But here's the thing though, I guess

481
00:23:09,160 --> 00:23:12,680
you could say is that even now average height men

482
00:23:12,720 --> 00:23:13,799
are considered short.

483
00:23:14,319 --> 00:23:17,000
Speaker 3: Five nine nine is considered short.

484
00:23:17,160 --> 00:23:21,079
Speaker 2: Yeah, but that's the average American male height and we're

485
00:23:21,079 --> 00:23:22,599
one of the taller countries. HM.

486
00:23:23,119 --> 00:23:25,680
Speaker 1: Like, even though you would technically look up as somebody

487
00:23:25,680 --> 00:23:28,400
that was five to nine, you're really looking down on them.

488
00:23:28,759 --> 00:23:33,319
Speaker 3: I do, unless they're like pretty rich or hot or

489
00:23:33,359 --> 00:23:35,519
a good dancer. I feel like if you're a good dancer,

490
00:23:35,640 --> 00:23:36,240
you can get.

491
00:23:36,119 --> 00:23:38,799
Speaker 1: Away with So you could be five five bald, ugly

492
00:23:38,839 --> 00:23:40,440
as hell. But if you just if.

493
00:23:40,400 --> 00:23:42,640
Speaker 3: You're rich, if you're rich and a good dancer, so

494
00:23:42,680 --> 00:23:44,680
you're still out of the three box. Yeah, you can't

495
00:23:44,720 --> 00:23:46,880
just beat you can't just be one.

496
00:23:46,920 --> 00:23:52,319
Speaker 2: He's homeless, no, no, but five to ten, great dancer,

497
00:23:52,799 --> 00:23:54,839
and he hits the dougie like no other, the.

498
00:23:54,920 --> 00:24:00,359
Speaker 3: Dougie like a great sign. Me up already.

499
00:24:01,079 --> 00:24:02,000
Speaker 2: Dripping in fact?

500
00:24:03,680 --> 00:24:03,880
Speaker 3: Yeah?

501
00:24:04,839 --> 00:24:08,400
Speaker 2: Uh. Next up, we have our guy who we know

502
00:24:08,559 --> 00:24:13,440
killed someone foresure documented as fuck. I'm going in chronological

503
00:24:13,519 --> 00:24:14,160
order of when they were a.

504
00:24:14,160 --> 00:24:16,359
Speaker 3: President, not order of most toils killings.

505
00:24:17,359 --> 00:24:20,079
Speaker 2: In fact, Andrew Jackson, we're talk about Andre Jackson. You'll

506
00:24:20,119 --> 00:24:22,640
probably actually can you guess which president has the most

507
00:24:22,680 --> 00:24:28,799
kills Andrew Jackson? Oh, there'll be someone both unexpected but

508
00:24:28,839 --> 00:24:31,000
once you hear the name, unsurprising.

509
00:24:31,920 --> 00:24:35,880
Speaker 1: By his hands, somebody that fought.

510
00:24:35,480 --> 00:24:41,759
Speaker 2: In world War One or World War two. Close, I guess, yeah,

511
00:24:41,759 --> 00:24:46,279
that's accurate. Okay, so that limits it doing the math

512
00:24:46,559 --> 00:24:51,759
couldn't have been FDR. Nope, he's just physically not capable

513
00:24:51,799 --> 00:24:53,599
of doing such. I mean he can still walk during

514
00:24:53,640 --> 00:24:55,200
World War One, but he was too rich to serve

515
00:24:56,559 --> 00:24:59,359
type of thing where I don't know, you just pay. Well,

516
00:24:59,359 --> 00:25:01,079
we'll get to him, cause he's on the list.

517
00:25:01,079 --> 00:25:02,359
Speaker 1: Calvin Coolidge stype.

518
00:25:02,160 --> 00:25:04,160
Speaker 2: We'll get to him. He's on the list. But yeah,

519
00:25:04,319 --> 00:25:05,759
sort of similar.

520
00:25:05,880 --> 00:25:09,359
Speaker 1: I guess, well, we know Calvin Coolidge is too much

521
00:25:09,359 --> 00:25:10,519
of a chad to kill.

522
00:25:10,640 --> 00:25:12,319
Speaker 2: Yeah, we'll get to him. We'll get to him next time.

523
00:25:12,319 --> 00:25:15,799
We have Andrew Jackson. Though Andrew Jackson has taken more

524
00:25:15,839 --> 00:25:18,359
than this life. But we're just going to talk about

525
00:25:18,359 --> 00:25:20,240
this one life that he snatched because it's pretty good,

526
00:25:20,240 --> 00:25:22,440
because we yeah, and because we know it is.

527
00:25:22,599 --> 00:25:26,880
Speaker 1: He also could have caught more bodies like Davy Crockett

528
00:25:26,960 --> 00:25:28,759
robbed Andrew Jackson of a body.

529
00:25:29,359 --> 00:25:31,440
Speaker 2: Yeah. When Andrew jacks we talked about on a last

530
00:25:31,480 --> 00:25:34,160
week's show. It was a Patreon episode a couple weeks ago. Okay,

531
00:25:34,680 --> 00:25:38,240
Andrew Jackson was the first president who was attempted to

532
00:25:38,279 --> 00:25:42,960
be assassinated, but both the guy's flint lock pistols was fired,

533
00:25:43,319 --> 00:25:45,519
and Andrew Jackson just started beating him to death with

534
00:25:45,559 --> 00:25:48,400
his cane, and Davy Crockett had to pop in and

535
00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:52,359
hold Andrew Jackson back. But that would have been so

536
00:25:52,440 --> 00:25:54,400
cool if he had finished it off. I think it's

537
00:25:54,400 --> 00:25:57,279
cool that Davy Crockett had had to hold you back, right,

538
00:25:57,359 --> 00:26:00,200
and then he was also prosecuted by Francis Scott Key.

539
00:26:01,400 --> 00:26:04,359
Speaker 1: Just crazy amount of names that came together for what

540
00:26:04,440 --> 00:26:07,240
a story, the assassination ensemble.

541
00:26:07,519 --> 00:26:10,799
Speaker 2: It's a magical nation. But Jackson, the one kill we

542
00:26:10,880 --> 00:26:13,079
know for sure was in a duel. He definitely killed

543
00:26:13,079 --> 00:26:15,720
others in battle and god knows where else, but in

544
00:26:15,759 --> 00:26:17,839
a duel in eighteen o five.

545
00:26:17,880 --> 00:26:20,079
Speaker 1: I feel like he has a few dual bodies.

546
00:26:20,519 --> 00:26:25,079
Speaker 2: This is the documented, for sure dual body. Again, Jackson

547
00:26:25,079 --> 00:26:28,640
has many bodies, I like by his hand, like it's

548
00:26:28,680 --> 00:26:29,279
more than one.

549
00:26:29,200 --> 00:26:31,000
Speaker 1: Battle in New Orleans. I think he took some.

550
00:26:31,480 --> 00:26:34,200
Speaker 2: Actually, that one, I bet he didn't because the British

551
00:26:34,240 --> 00:26:36,559
never got close and he was only he wasn't rocking

552
00:26:36,599 --> 00:26:37,400
a arranged weapon.

553
00:26:37,480 --> 00:26:39,039
Speaker 1: He became king of New Orleans.

554
00:26:39,160 --> 00:26:41,799
Speaker 2: That's fine. I'm just saying he I guarantee you he

555
00:26:41,839 --> 00:26:44,200
did not kill any one of the Battle of New Orleans.

556
00:26:44,960 --> 00:26:46,119
The British never got.

557
00:26:46,079 --> 00:26:49,799
Speaker 1: Close in But again, like Washington after.

558
00:26:50,359 --> 00:26:51,079
Speaker 2: Maybe yeah he might.

559
00:26:51,759 --> 00:26:52,920
Speaker 1: Jackson seems like a war criminal.

560
00:26:52,960 --> 00:26:54,599
Speaker 2: He might have put one in a in a dim

561
00:26:54,759 --> 00:26:55,440
also seems like a.

562
00:26:55,359 --> 00:26:57,319
Speaker 3: Revenge killer like he seems to. He seems like he

563
00:26:57,359 --> 00:26:59,799
would do it for the bit, right, like in front

564
00:26:59,799 --> 00:27:01,960
of crowd to like earn respect.

565
00:27:02,240 --> 00:27:03,319
Speaker 1: That's just the old Hickory.

566
00:27:03,559 --> 00:27:08,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, just like think twice before you cross Andrew Jackson

567
00:27:09,240 --> 00:27:09,640
or something.

568
00:27:09,759 --> 00:27:11,599
Speaker 2: Yes, that's on brand for him completely.

569
00:27:11,720 --> 00:27:13,920
Speaker 1: He doesn't probably fuck somebody to death at the White House,

570
00:27:14,079 --> 00:27:17,880
oh Jesus. Uh so when he got inaugurated New fear

571
00:27:18,200 --> 00:27:21,039
he had a giant orgy at the White House.

572
00:27:21,039 --> 00:27:23,440
Speaker 2: I wonder if it's an aneurysm from an orgasm that

573
00:27:23,519 --> 00:27:26,920
was too good, like your brain just pops.

574
00:27:27,079 --> 00:27:28,279
Speaker 3: I guess that'd be kind of cool.

575
00:27:28,519 --> 00:27:30,359
Speaker 1: Yeah, isn't that how you want to go out? I

576
00:27:30,440 --> 00:27:32,240
mean masthe euphoria?

577
00:27:32,440 --> 00:27:35,359
Speaker 3: Yeah, and then how I think that's how Matthew McConaughey's dad.

578
00:27:35,279 --> 00:27:38,319
Speaker 1: Dad, who apparently was also what like in.

579
00:27:38,279 --> 00:27:40,440
Speaker 3: The middle of fucking his mom, he had like a

580
00:27:40,440 --> 00:27:41,279
heart attack and died.

581
00:27:41,319 --> 00:27:41,839
Speaker 2: Oh sweet.

582
00:27:42,039 --> 00:27:43,559
Speaker 1: The dad that he thinks is his dad though, but

583
00:27:43,599 --> 00:27:45,319
I believe there's like a connection between him.

584
00:27:45,160 --> 00:27:45,960
Speaker 2: And Woody Harrelson.

585
00:27:46,279 --> 00:27:49,839
Speaker 1: So Woody Harrelson's dad might also have fathered Matthew McConaughey.

586
00:27:49,880 --> 00:27:51,240
Speaker 2: That would be so cool.

587
00:27:51,400 --> 00:27:54,079
Speaker 1: And also, Woody Harrelson's dad was a hit man.

588
00:27:54,200 --> 00:27:54,680
Speaker 2: Was a hit man.

589
00:27:55,200 --> 00:27:56,079
Speaker 1: He's a contract killer.

590
00:27:56,160 --> 00:27:59,559
Speaker 3: Was he living in Blanco, Texas or wherever the fuck

591
00:27:59,680 --> 00:27:59,960
he's from?

592
00:28:00,480 --> 00:28:03,200
Speaker 1: You know, he is from this area, like Okay, central

593
00:28:03,240 --> 00:28:09,160
Texas area. But he also apparently claimed to have a

594
00:28:09,200 --> 00:28:10,680
part in the JFK assassination.

595
00:28:11,640 --> 00:28:16,279
Speaker 3: Everyone is everyone looks for their deal. Yeah, there's no

596
00:28:16,319 --> 00:28:17,400
way it can be that many players.

597
00:28:17,440 --> 00:28:19,000
Speaker 1: But he at least took out a judge and he's

598
00:28:19,000 --> 00:28:20,359
a confirmed contract killer.

599
00:28:20,680 --> 00:28:23,279
Speaker 2: Yeah he went to jail. Was a federal judge or

600
00:28:23,480 --> 00:28:26,000
a federal judge, Yeah, yeah, I would hope. So I

601
00:28:26,000 --> 00:28:28,119
feel like that's the most common assassination. I feel like

602
00:28:28,119 --> 00:28:29,960
a lot of federal judges just get got you Just

603
00:28:30,039 --> 00:28:32,920
what if he just took out a TV judge, like

604
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:35,119
judge actually.

605
00:28:35,519 --> 00:28:37,960
Speaker 3: Or like the judges from like the Spanish channels. It's

606
00:28:38,000 --> 00:28:41,400
just like where it's just like a like a slutty telemovela.

607
00:28:41,680 --> 00:28:44,160
Speaker 2: I think version of judge duty that you should be

608
00:28:44,200 --> 00:28:48,000
allowed to bribe TV judges on air, Like you just

609
00:28:48,039 --> 00:28:49,640
be able to pay pay your way out of they're

610
00:28:49,680 --> 00:28:52,559
not real judges, right, yeah they're not so, but you

611
00:28:52,599 --> 00:28:54,680
do sign something to make them.

612
00:28:54,839 --> 00:28:55,880
Speaker 1: I would adhere to the.

613
00:28:57,000 --> 00:28:58,400
Speaker 2: Arbitrator or whatever.

614
00:28:58,519 --> 00:28:59,519
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's like a mediator.

615
00:28:59,599 --> 00:29:01,720
Speaker 2: Although so someone actually said there was a fucker I

616
00:29:01,720 --> 00:29:03,599
had like BuzzFeed or something. It was all kind of

617
00:29:03,599 --> 00:29:07,039
bullshit too, and like the show would pay your settlement,

618
00:29:07,119 --> 00:29:09,240
not the other person. Yeah, And so these guys who

619
00:29:09,279 --> 00:29:11,039
lived in LA would just get on Judge Judy and

620
00:29:11,079 --> 00:29:13,319
shit all the time, and like with made up stuff

621
00:29:13,359 --> 00:29:15,240
like he ran over my dog or whatever.

622
00:29:15,359 --> 00:29:17,640
Speaker 3: Have you ever seen how Too with John Wilson. It's

623
00:29:17,680 --> 00:29:20,119
such a funny show. But he he did that a

624
00:29:20,119 --> 00:29:21,960
lot like in LA, Like he would just he had

625
00:29:21,960 --> 00:29:23,880
like a lot of time, and so anyone who wronged

626
00:29:23,960 --> 00:29:27,400
him he would like submit to Judge Judy or and

627
00:29:27,480 --> 00:29:29,640
so he was on like three or four episodes just

628
00:29:29,640 --> 00:29:31,279
because he's like a dude with too much time on

629
00:29:31,359 --> 00:29:34,359
his hands, who like it's kind of autistic about documenting everything,

630
00:29:34,400 --> 00:29:37,559
like he had everything documented so he was like, that's perfect.

631
00:29:37,599 --> 00:29:40,160
Speaker 1: If you tried to get on one daytime TV show,

632
00:29:40,720 --> 00:29:41,839
what would it be and why is it?

633
00:29:41,880 --> 00:29:43,160
Speaker 2: The price is right, it's.

634
00:29:43,000 --> 00:29:44,640
Speaker 3: Got to be the price. That was my first thought

635
00:29:44,799 --> 00:29:46,839
or honestly, uh.

636
00:29:46,440 --> 00:29:47,599
Speaker 1: And if you get on the prices right?

637
00:29:47,599 --> 00:29:47,920
Speaker 2: What game?

638
00:29:47,920 --> 00:29:50,920
Speaker 3: Wheel of Fortune? I don't remember this game going for

639
00:29:51,240 --> 00:29:53,680
of prices right. I don't think I'm good at I

640
00:29:53,720 --> 00:29:55,319
would be good at that because I just I don't

641
00:29:55,319 --> 00:29:56,160
know what things cost.

642
00:29:56,279 --> 00:29:58,759
Speaker 1: You don't like the yodeler mountain climber, Well.

643
00:29:58,680 --> 00:30:00,960
Speaker 2: That's if you win. So yeah, first you gets the price,

644
00:30:01,000 --> 00:30:02,680
then you go up and you play the second game.

645
00:30:03,440 --> 00:30:06,599
There's like multiple it's like multiple weight like steps to

646
00:30:06,599 --> 00:30:07,079
getting to them.

647
00:30:07,119 --> 00:30:08,440
Speaker 1: Well, you always pass on the first.

648
00:30:08,480 --> 00:30:10,440
Speaker 3: I think i'd do like Who Wants to be a Millionaire?

649
00:30:10,720 --> 00:30:13,000
Or Wheel of Fortune. I play a lot of trivia

650
00:30:13,039 --> 00:30:14,160
games and world word games.

651
00:30:14,200 --> 00:30:15,839
Speaker 1: I don't think you would do good on Who Wants.

652
00:30:15,680 --> 00:30:16,400
Speaker 2: To be a Millionaire?

653
00:30:17,079 --> 00:30:21,400
Speaker 3: Okay, challenge accepted, Look off, Wait, let's do it. Let's

654
00:30:21,559 --> 00:30:24,880
I if it's not just history.

655
00:30:24,599 --> 00:30:28,640
Speaker 2: Hold on, we will have a trivia competition in the

656
00:30:28,640 --> 00:30:32,519
future between you two on the Patreon. Hello, we've been

657
00:30:32,559 --> 00:30:34,200
wea because now we haven't been able to do game

658
00:30:34,240 --> 00:30:37,240
shows really because Jake's been gone. So all right, good,

659
00:30:37,319 --> 00:30:38,920
good show. I'm gonna write this.

660
00:30:38,960 --> 00:30:42,119
Speaker 3: I'm gonna You're gonna He's gonna fucking ruin you.

661
00:30:42,359 --> 00:30:45,839
Speaker 2: Dan. I'm like undefeated. Dan tries to fuck me constantly.

662
00:30:46,759 --> 00:30:48,799
Speaker 3: And I've beaten Jakereemam Nolu.

663
00:30:49,799 --> 00:30:52,920
Speaker 1: I've only gone against both of them once each and

664
00:30:52,920 --> 00:30:53,799
I beat them both times.

665
00:30:54,039 --> 00:30:57,039
Speaker 2: I don't like to talk about that in raging anyway.

666
00:30:57,160 --> 00:31:02,599
And Jackson Andrew Jackson in eighteen oh five, Andrew Jackson's

667
00:31:02,599 --> 00:31:05,720
horse was supposed to race some other guy's horse, and uh,

668
00:31:06,000 --> 00:31:08,160
I forget how much the bet was for, but there

669
00:31:08,279 --> 00:31:10,640
was a penalty if the horse dropped out after a

670
00:31:10,640 --> 00:31:11,240
certain date.

671
00:31:11,759 --> 00:31:14,799
Speaker 3: The horse dropped out, Yeah, the guy whatever die or

672
00:31:14,880 --> 00:31:18,519
losing the horse pulls a hammy can the horse doesn't.

673
00:31:18,279 --> 00:31:19,240
Speaker 1: Have a say.

674
00:31:19,319 --> 00:31:21,880
Speaker 2: Horses don't drop out. So if the guy drops the

675
00:31:21,920 --> 00:31:23,880
horse out because the horse is no longer healthy enough

676
00:31:23,880 --> 00:31:26,559
to do it, whatever, So anyway, guy drops his horse out,

677
00:31:26,599 --> 00:31:28,920
can't do it. And there was a dropout penalty after

678
00:31:28,960 --> 00:31:31,839
a certain date. So this guy owes Andrew Jackson eight

679
00:31:31,920 --> 00:31:34,960
hundred dollars equivalent of twenty one thousand dollars today.

680
00:31:34,720 --> 00:31:35,680
Speaker 3: Like a boxing promoter.

681
00:31:35,880 --> 00:31:37,079
Speaker 2: Yeah, for dropping.

682
00:31:36,720 --> 00:31:39,279
Speaker 1: Out killing somebody over twenty one gras.

683
00:31:39,200 --> 00:31:42,920
Speaker 2: It's not what it's over really at all. So for

684
00:31:43,000 --> 00:31:46,200
me is maybe fifty It starts, this is what starts

685
00:31:46,200 --> 00:31:49,920
the feud. It just they kill each other over they

686
00:31:49,960 --> 00:31:51,160
kill each other over words.

687
00:31:52,160 --> 00:31:54,319
Speaker 1: Even if I'm still questioning.

688
00:31:54,559 --> 00:31:58,160
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think figures take the risk. Even that it's like,

689
00:31:58,680 --> 00:32:01,039
that's not really have to be like a life changing

690
00:32:01,079 --> 00:32:02,559
amount of money, right, like a.

691
00:32:02,480 --> 00:32:07,000
Speaker 2: Million dollars probably, yeah, yeah, because even it's like, okay, yeah,

692
00:32:07,000 --> 00:32:08,680
it's a lot. It's a lot of trouble for a

693
00:32:08,839 --> 00:32:12,440
n K. Yeah, right, So what do you have to

694
00:32:12,440 --> 00:32:16,319
pay for wet work? Like minimum wet work?

695
00:32:17,519 --> 00:32:18,680
Speaker 3: Little body disposal?

696
00:32:19,200 --> 00:32:25,799
Speaker 2: What's wet work? Little hit man action? Okay, I have

697
00:32:25,880 --> 00:32:26,400
no idea.

698
00:32:27,359 --> 00:32:30,400
Speaker 1: What's the going rate for just somebody to off someone?

699
00:32:30,440 --> 00:32:32,880
Speaker 2: For you to get on the dark web real quick?

700
00:32:33,079 --> 00:32:35,960
Speaker 1: What's the lowest price tag where you feel comfortable the guy.

701
00:32:35,880 --> 00:32:37,440
Speaker 3: Would you're gonna get your money's worth?

702
00:32:37,559 --> 00:32:39,359
Speaker 1: It's five hundred dollars. I'm not paying that and he's like,

703
00:32:39,480 --> 00:32:40,079
the guy sucks.

704
00:32:40,720 --> 00:32:43,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, would have to be so much money, it would

705
00:32:43,000 --> 00:32:43,759
have to be I think.

706
00:32:44,279 --> 00:32:45,839
Speaker 1: I have confidence.

707
00:32:45,880 --> 00:32:48,000
Speaker 3: I don't know, even ten grand. To me, it's like

708
00:32:48,200 --> 00:32:50,400
for what it would take for someone to do that,

709
00:32:50,880 --> 00:32:53,599
and the resources it would take and the experience it

710
00:32:53,599 --> 00:32:56,000
would take to like pull it off correctly. To me,

711
00:32:56,160 --> 00:32:58,759
ten k feels like a group on level. Like to me,

712
00:32:58,839 --> 00:33:02,079
ten k, you're still going to deal he's cutting cutting cornything.

713
00:33:01,680 --> 00:33:05,319
Speaker 2: About that to make one hundred thousand dollars, he has

714
00:33:05,359 --> 00:33:06,519
to kill ten people a year.

715
00:33:06,799 --> 00:33:10,000
Speaker 3: No, that's too much work. That's a lot of labor. Yeah,

716
00:33:10,200 --> 00:33:12,200
because it's it's not just the killing, it's all the

717
00:33:12,200 --> 00:33:15,480
preparation and planning and just clean up one hundred K.

718
00:33:15,680 --> 00:33:18,720
Speaker 2: No, it's got to be at least I would say

719
00:33:18,759 --> 00:33:19,240
fifty K.

720
00:33:19,319 --> 00:33:22,599
Speaker 3: And fifty k would be like for somebody that's kind

721
00:33:22,599 --> 00:33:24,559
of old, where you could kind of blame it on

722
00:33:24,640 --> 00:33:26,799
age or their own like you could make it look

723
00:33:26,839 --> 00:33:29,480
like an accident, you know. But if it's like somebody

724
00:33:29,480 --> 00:33:31,440
healthy and in the public eye, I feel like it's

725
00:33:31,480 --> 00:33:32,720
got to be at least one hundred K.

726
00:33:33,240 --> 00:33:35,000
Speaker 2: Yes, it's got to be six fakes to get the

727
00:33:35,039 --> 00:33:39,279
job easily. Yeah, there's just no way are you googling that.

728
00:33:39,279 --> 00:33:40,480
I wouldn't recommend it.

729
00:33:40,720 --> 00:33:43,200
Speaker 1: Oh, you're right, that's probably a bad idea.

730
00:33:43,279 --> 00:33:45,519
Speaker 2: Yeah, I would not recommend googling. That's an that's an

731
00:33:45,559 --> 00:33:46,240
instant flag.

732
00:33:46,359 --> 00:33:48,000
Speaker 3: You can a duck duck go it though.

733
00:33:48,759 --> 00:33:50,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, I might be more comfortable with duck dug gulling

734
00:33:51,279 --> 00:33:52,160
or ask Jeeves.

735
00:33:52,359 --> 00:33:55,039
Speaker 3: Yeah, je will Jesus, but Jeeves will show you nineteen

736
00:33:55,039 --> 00:33:56,680
to eighty eight prices. So you have to use an

737
00:33:56,680 --> 00:33:58,519
inflation calculator, which.

738
00:33:58,319 --> 00:34:00,559
Speaker 2: I already have in my head. It's just two steps.

739
00:34:00,559 --> 00:34:04,559
It's fine. So the race got called off. Jackson's owded

740
00:34:04,640 --> 00:34:08,199
eight hundred dollars, the guy who was supposed to race. Uh,

741
00:34:08,280 --> 00:34:10,559
they've gotten a little argument over just like how the

742
00:34:10,599 --> 00:34:12,880
money was going to be paid, what that arrangement was,

743
00:34:13,440 --> 00:34:16,159
and things get a little chippy. So the guy's son

744
00:34:16,199 --> 00:34:20,760
in law, Charles Dickinson, becomes in rage, gets really upset

745
00:34:20,760 --> 00:34:23,039
with Andrew Jackson because he thinks Jackson's being a dick

746
00:34:23,079 --> 00:34:25,800
about it, and Jackson probably is being about it. He's

747
00:34:25,840 --> 00:34:30,719
Andrew Jackson, He's his baseline. He is baseline, fucking dick hole.

748
00:34:30,639 --> 00:34:32,320
Speaker 1: Be weird if he was nice to me, I know.

749
00:34:32,800 --> 00:34:39,480
Speaker 2: So Jackson and him start exchanging words and letters, and

750
00:34:40,360 --> 00:34:45,880
uh not just letters but competing guest newspaper columns.

751
00:34:45,880 --> 00:34:49,079
Speaker 3: I guess oh, I love it. I love it. It's like, yeah,

752
00:34:49,119 --> 00:34:49,599
like they're.

753
00:34:49,440 --> 00:34:55,880
Speaker 2: Just in between the paper. So Dickinson calls Jackson a

754
00:34:55,920 --> 00:35:01,280
coward and an equivocator. Dickinson published a state no not

755
00:35:01,440 --> 00:35:04,920
for then it's real bad. Yeah, these are og distract

756
00:35:05,000 --> 00:35:07,559
you know, you can't just be called a coward like that.

757
00:35:07,840 --> 00:35:10,079
In the National Review in eighteen oh six, he calls

758
00:35:10,159 --> 00:35:13,760
Jackson a worthless scoundrel, a poltroon, and a coward.

759
00:35:13,840 --> 00:35:14,679
Speaker 3: What's a poltroon.

760
00:35:15,119 --> 00:35:17,639
Speaker 2: It's just another word for coward. Actually, let me look

761
00:35:17,679 --> 00:35:18,480
up the exact definition.

762
00:35:18,639 --> 00:35:19,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, there's actually.

763
00:35:19,679 --> 00:35:23,840
Speaker 2: Utter coward coward, so it's like the lowest level of coward.

764
00:35:24,199 --> 00:35:26,039
Speaker 1: Jackson was like, that's why I fucked you a bit

765
00:35:26,159 --> 00:35:28,079
you fat motherfucker.

766
00:35:27,840 --> 00:35:29,239
Speaker 3: And you like boys.

767
00:35:30,639 --> 00:35:34,559
Speaker 2: You're yet I don't know, well actually speaking of everybody

768
00:35:34,880 --> 00:35:39,920
speaking of bitches. At one point this got really heated

769
00:35:40,039 --> 00:35:47,400
because Jackson thought that, uh, Dickinson had insulted his wife,

770
00:35:47,920 --> 00:35:52,760
Rachel Jackson, Uh huh, and Dickinson, this is actually my

771
00:35:52,840 --> 00:35:57,239
wife's name, au choll Mount literally and Dickinson, this is

772
00:35:57,239 --> 00:36:01,760
the weirdest part of the whole story. Dickinson was like, oh,

773
00:36:02,360 --> 00:36:06,480
I might have, but if I did, I was real drunk,

774
00:36:06,519 --> 00:36:08,079
and that's over the line. I'm sorry.

775
00:36:09,119 --> 00:36:11,400
Speaker 1: I thought he's gonna be like, oh, you're absolutely right.

776
00:36:11,480 --> 00:36:12,880
Speaker 3: That's what your wife said last night.

777
00:36:12,960 --> 00:36:17,719
Speaker 2: Yeah, and Jackson was like apology accept Huh. Yeah, He's like,

778
00:36:17,760 --> 00:36:20,400
all right, you're because I think Jackson also is like

779
00:36:20,480 --> 00:36:22,519
I get it. Look, I'm pretty drunk all the time.

780
00:36:22,639 --> 00:36:25,599
Speaker 3: So we all we all do shit we shouldn't have done.

781
00:36:25,639 --> 00:36:31,199
Speaker 2: Been there. But the argument kept going. They got more

782
00:36:31,199 --> 00:36:34,119
heated and heated about the horns and everything else. Eventually

783
00:36:34,159 --> 00:36:35,360
he just gets to the point where they just fucking

784
00:36:35,400 --> 00:36:39,880
hate each other and a duel was finally asked for

785
00:36:40,000 --> 00:36:45,440
by Dickinson. I believe in it, like meet you under

786
00:36:45,480 --> 00:36:47,159
the tree at noon tomorrow.

787
00:36:47,239 --> 00:36:50,440
Speaker 1: I don't think you can document it because it's technically illegal.

788
00:36:51,039 --> 00:36:54,159
Speaker 2: Oh okay. Even when these duels were happening, they weren't

789
00:36:54,360 --> 00:36:55,519
super duper legal.

790
00:36:55,320 --> 00:36:57,519
Speaker 1: Like a lot of them had to happen in New Jersey,

791
00:36:57,960 --> 00:37:00,360
which apparently was the one state that was it was

792
00:37:00,400 --> 00:37:01,079
cool to do it.

793
00:37:01,119 --> 00:37:04,800
Speaker 2: Then this one they had right for nurse Yeah, this

794
00:37:04,840 --> 00:37:09,800
one they had to leave Nashville, maybe even Tennessee completely,

795
00:37:09,880 --> 00:37:12,639
I forget, but they did have to travel to do

796
00:37:12,679 --> 00:37:14,559
the duel. They had to go somewhere else to do it.

797
00:37:14,639 --> 00:37:17,199
Speaker 1: You gotta go to native land like a casino kind of.

798
00:37:17,280 --> 00:37:19,840
Speaker 2: Yes, it is like a reservation situation.

799
00:37:20,639 --> 00:37:23,559
Speaker 3: What happens on the res stays on these And.

800
00:37:23,519 --> 00:37:27,360
Speaker 2: That's where Jackson got his native baby. That's where he

801
00:37:27,400 --> 00:37:30,320
adopted it. Well, he got it from sending people to

802
00:37:30,400 --> 00:37:33,679
a reservation. Mm hmm hmmm. And that one he was

803
00:37:33,719 --> 00:37:36,400
just like, oh, I kill your parents a little.

804
00:37:36,159 --> 00:37:39,639
Speaker 3: Sweetie mommy and Danny, I'll be your mommy and yeah.

805
00:37:39,559 --> 00:37:41,079
Speaker 1: And was that his only kid?

806
00:37:41,400 --> 00:37:43,679
Speaker 2: I think it was. I don't think he had kids

807
00:37:43,679 --> 00:37:45,400
of his own, but I could be wrong. Is sterile

808
00:37:46,039 --> 00:37:46,960
he kind of looked.

809
00:37:46,719 --> 00:37:49,320
Speaker 3: At he's firing blakes.

810
00:37:49,639 --> 00:37:55,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, that explains the murder, explains his aggression. Yeah, he's

811
00:37:55,559 --> 00:37:59,840
he was an extremely aggres like sexually frustrated man. Let's

812
00:37:59,840 --> 00:38:06,639
see if you had children two including the uh Indian

813
00:38:06,719 --> 00:38:10,199
kids of his own. Yeah, Lynn Koya Jackson, So they

814
00:38:10,239 --> 00:38:12,519
kild make it. I bet the kid died in my childhood.

815
00:38:12,599 --> 00:38:15,719
He probably did, because the other name is not even listed. Yikes.

816
00:38:15,920 --> 00:38:17,840
Speaker 3: Yeah, so it doesn't bode well.

817
00:38:17,880 --> 00:38:22,920
Speaker 2: Who the hell does anyway, So Jackson duels called. Turns

818
00:38:22,920 --> 00:38:28,440
out Dickinson is dueling uh mate or whatever. His opponent

819
00:38:28,719 --> 00:38:36,800
uh is a literal mark marksman, literally a crack shot,

820
00:38:37,039 --> 00:38:40,119
so much so that Dickinson they left Nashville the day

821
00:38:40,119 --> 00:38:41,920
before the duel with his bros. You know, because you

822
00:38:41,920 --> 00:38:43,639
bring your bros and you bring all your friends and like,

823
00:38:43,840 --> 00:38:45,880
bring your squad. Yeah, it brings the squad. And they

824
00:38:45,960 --> 00:38:48,000
kept stopping on the side of the road so Digginson

825
00:38:48,039 --> 00:38:50,119
could be like, watch me shoot that bird off the

826
00:38:50,119 --> 00:38:55,480
branch that acorn. Yeah, I've never heard of him. And

827
00:38:55,519 --> 00:38:56,239
there's a reason.

828
00:38:56,480 --> 00:38:59,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, so maybe not that good of a marksman.

829
00:38:59,159 --> 00:39:04,360
Speaker 2: Well no, no, Uh. Jackson and his bro knowing that

830
00:39:04,440 --> 00:39:09,840
Dickinson could shoot, went with a risky plan, uh, but

831
00:39:09,960 --> 00:39:16,000
a bold plan. Duck. No, they thought, cheat, let's let

832
00:39:16,119 --> 00:39:22,199
him shoot first, eat the bullet, because maybe he'll be

833
00:39:22,239 --> 00:39:26,280
so hyped to shoot. They'll be a little too excited.

834
00:39:26,239 --> 00:39:27,280
Speaker 3: The marksman shoot first.

835
00:39:27,360 --> 00:39:29,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, they'll be. If he's a little too excited, maybe

836
00:39:29,840 --> 00:39:32,280
he won't hit his mark. He won't, he'll miss with.

837
00:39:34,679 --> 00:39:36,800
Speaker 1: But it worked. It was so crazy.

838
00:39:36,840 --> 00:39:38,679
Speaker 2: It worked.

839
00:39:38,760 --> 00:39:41,760
Speaker 1: It would work as a hard It works because Jackson

840
00:39:42,000 --> 00:39:44,960
just takes bullets. It doesn't hurt him. He's fucking superman.

841
00:39:46,159 --> 00:39:50,239
Speaker 2: He is Wolverine. So Jackson and Overton also did have

842
00:39:50,280 --> 00:39:52,719
a backup plan or a co plan with that play.

843
00:39:52,760 --> 00:39:54,559
Speaker 1: Is this the bullet that stays in Jackson the rest

844
00:39:54,599 --> 00:39:55,039
of his life?

845
00:39:55,119 --> 00:39:56,800
Speaker 2: Yes, this is how he gets the name Old Hickory.

846
00:39:57,039 --> 00:40:00,719
So Dickinson shoots him square fucking chest.

847
00:40:02,960 --> 00:40:05,400
Speaker 1: But his heart was too small like the green.

848
00:40:07,000 --> 00:40:10,199
Speaker 2: He didn't hit it, just a flesh wound. Yeah, I

849
00:40:10,199 --> 00:40:12,880
guess that bullet statum for the rest of where was it?

850
00:40:12,880 --> 00:40:15,199
It was just like great right here. I forget what side,

851
00:40:15,199 --> 00:40:21,480
but I mean right in the Jackson was skinny guy. Huh,

852
00:40:21,599 --> 00:40:26,039
Jackson was fit get thin. So Jackson and Overton also

853
00:40:26,079 --> 00:40:29,000
had a secondary strategy, uh, to go along with that,

854
00:40:29,039 --> 00:40:31,760
where Overton, if he wins won the coin toss, because

855
00:40:31,760 --> 00:40:36,400
Overton his bro was his second, if he won the

856
00:40:36,440 --> 00:40:41,880
coin toss, he would get to say fire, and so

857
00:40:42,760 --> 00:40:45,559
he would ask Dickinson the question, gentlemen, are you ready?

858
00:40:47,039 --> 00:40:50,679
He would ask Dickinson that after he asked Jackson. So

859
00:40:50,719 --> 00:40:53,199
he'd say, gentlemen, are you ready to Jackson say, gentlemen,

860
00:40:53,199 --> 00:40:55,039
are you ready to Dickinson and he would say yes,

861
00:40:55,039 --> 00:40:57,280
and then he would immediately say fire to try and

862
00:40:57,280 --> 00:41:00,719
get Dickinson to get him hurried up, two sped up.

863
00:41:00,960 --> 00:41:03,599
Maybe he misses and he does. He did all of this.

864
00:41:03,679 --> 00:41:05,599
He won the coin toss. He did the little trick

865
00:41:05,639 --> 00:41:08,559
ticky tac tactic didn't work. Jackson took it right in

866
00:41:08,559 --> 00:41:09,239
the fucking chest.

867
00:41:09,360 --> 00:41:09,719
Speaker 3: Damn.

868
00:41:11,000 --> 00:41:14,159
Speaker 2: But Jackson not only survived, as we know.

869
00:41:14,719 --> 00:41:19,960
Speaker 1: Made he took the bullet adrenaline.

870
00:41:19,440 --> 00:41:24,119
Speaker 2: Hit Yeah, aimed a pistol and uh, here's the funny

871
00:41:24,119 --> 00:41:26,079
thing on your doing is so Dickinson hits him and

872
00:41:26,119 --> 00:41:28,480
it's like, oh, hell yeah, I hit him. And Jackson's

873
00:41:28,559 --> 00:41:32,039
just like uspescial. Dickinson cannot move. He has to stand

874
00:41:32,039 --> 00:41:34,599
completely because he has that's the rules of dueling.

875
00:41:36,119 --> 00:41:37,800
Speaker 3: He can take his time and kind of line up

876
00:41:37,800 --> 00:41:39,280
a shot and like there's.

877
00:41:39,039 --> 00:41:41,159
Speaker 2: No shot clock. I mean there is a because we're

878
00:41:41,199 --> 00:41:41,960
a gentleman's agreement.

879
00:41:42,000 --> 00:41:45,039
Speaker 1: You can't take forever, but you can't like have ass

880
00:41:45,119 --> 00:41:49,599
on the ground like as he shoots, yeah, what just

881
00:41:49,679 --> 00:41:52,239
ask to the ground, like just drop No.

882
00:41:52,920 --> 00:41:54,920
Speaker 2: Honestly, if anything, you'll probably catch one in the face

883
00:41:55,000 --> 00:41:57,559
that way because you're shooting the center mass. So if

884
00:41:57,599 --> 00:42:00,280
you yeah, I.

885
00:42:00,199 --> 00:42:02,320
Speaker 1: Bet Jackson's a dickhead and goes for the temple.

886
00:42:03,199 --> 00:42:06,840
Speaker 2: He did not, but Jackson's pistol stopped at half cock,

887
00:42:07,119 --> 00:42:11,760
so he had to draw it back again while he's yeah,

888
00:42:11,800 --> 00:42:14,159
and he aimed again. This time he hit Dickinson in

889
00:42:14,159 --> 00:42:18,599
the chest and Dickinson bled to death. He probably killed

890
00:42:18,599 --> 00:42:20,239
about for other people too, but Dickinson is the one

891
00:42:20,360 --> 00:42:23,079
we know the details of confirmed kill.

892
00:42:23,920 --> 00:42:27,480
Speaker 1: If I was against Jackson probably has triple digits. Triple

893
00:42:27,719 --> 00:42:28,760
triple digits.

894
00:42:29,599 --> 00:42:33,199
Speaker 2: That's a lot hand by hand with the weapons he

895
00:42:33,239 --> 00:42:33,719
was using.

896
00:42:34,800 --> 00:42:36,000
Speaker 3: Yeah, y one at a time.

897
00:42:36,519 --> 00:42:38,920
Speaker 1: He was literally again for like three years king of

898
00:42:39,000 --> 00:42:43,000
New Orleans. What he did during that time is not

899
00:42:43,039 --> 00:42:45,599
really documented, and I think for good reason.

900
00:42:47,239 --> 00:42:51,440
Speaker 2: I mean, I think he's probably I would guess he

901
00:42:51,519 --> 00:42:54,679
was second place. If I had to guess second or

902
00:42:54,719 --> 00:43:01,480
third place, you're counting somebody that was probably a yes,

903
00:43:01,760 --> 00:43:03,159
potentially all right.

904
00:43:04,199 --> 00:43:06,199
Speaker 3: Come on, Dan, you're circling it. Say another name.

905
00:43:06,599 --> 00:43:07,199
Speaker 2: It's fine.

906
00:43:07,239 --> 00:43:09,079
Speaker 1: I don't want to spoil it, and we'll have to

907
00:43:09,199 --> 00:43:10,440
come to the conclusion it is.

908
00:43:11,280 --> 00:43:15,800
Speaker 2: But next up we have William Henry Harrison. Harrison is

909
00:43:15,800 --> 00:43:20,079
probably best known for being a bitch, being a great

910
00:43:20,119 --> 00:43:20,760
a bitch.

911
00:43:21,280 --> 00:43:23,000
Speaker 3: Not not a good thing to be known for.

912
00:43:23,039 --> 00:43:27,360
Speaker 2: He died forty one days into office, loser, because he

913
00:43:27,440 --> 00:43:30,320
got pneumonia after giving a long ass speech without wearing

914
00:43:30,320 --> 00:43:30,840
a jacket.

915
00:43:31,440 --> 00:43:32,039
Speaker 3: Embarrassing.

916
00:43:32,480 --> 00:43:34,320
Speaker 2: He gave the speech, though he didn't He's like, I

917
00:43:34,360 --> 00:43:36,719
don't I don't need this jacket. He's known for being

918
00:43:36,760 --> 00:43:39,320
a hard ass, which led to him dying.

919
00:43:39,639 --> 00:43:42,719
Speaker 3: Yeah, people that are, But like, you can't, you can't

920
00:43:42,760 --> 00:43:45,440
out hard mother nature. Mother nature will fuck you up.

921
00:43:45,559 --> 00:43:47,760
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's wear a jacket, a bit of a Kobe

922
00:43:47,760 --> 00:43:48,440
Bryant death.

923
00:43:48,519 --> 00:43:51,079
Speaker 3: Yeah, it was avoidable, Yeah, avoidable.

924
00:43:51,360 --> 00:43:54,239
Speaker 2: You can't have that mama mentality against mother nature. No,

925
00:43:54,440 --> 00:43:55,480
you can't mama mentality.

926
00:43:55,519 --> 00:43:56,920
Speaker 3: The fuck can't out mamba the fog.

927
00:43:57,079 --> 00:43:58,840
Speaker 2: Nope, you can't out mom by the rain.

928
00:44:00,679 --> 00:44:03,079
Speaker 3: It's just how it goes what one days. That's like pathetic.

929
00:44:03,280 --> 00:44:08,360
Speaker 2: Yeah, But actually Harrison, prior to that pretty bad ass motherfucker. Yeah,

930
00:44:08,679 --> 00:44:12,239
served in wars against Native Americans and in the War

931
00:44:12,280 --> 00:44:15,000
of eighteen twelve at the Battle of tip A Canoe

932
00:44:15,000 --> 00:44:17,079
in eighteen eleven, he was a general. That's where he

933
00:44:17,119 --> 00:44:20,000
got his his presidential slogan brought by the way Tipic

934
00:44:20,000 --> 00:44:23,840
Canoe and Tyler too. Tyler was his vice president who

935
00:44:23,840 --> 00:44:27,800
became president. Harrison was in command, but the combat was

936
00:44:27,840 --> 00:44:30,840
heavy and close, and again it was we're not talking

937
00:44:30,840 --> 00:44:32,599
about like Waterloo or World War two.

938
00:44:32,639 --> 00:44:34,920
Speaker 1: I love that His campaign slogan was just like, yeah,

939
00:44:35,400 --> 00:44:37,800
I fucked up some Indians Yep.

940
00:44:38,280 --> 00:44:41,440
Speaker 2: Yep, and I'll do it again too. People were like,

941
00:44:41,480 --> 00:44:45,119
that's why we're voting for him. Hell yeah. These were

942
00:44:45,119 --> 00:44:48,159
badass Indians who they were commanded by takumsa m And

943
00:44:48,199 --> 00:44:50,599
they were I know that name. They were hard. They

944
00:44:50,599 --> 00:44:55,280
were hard, hard motherfuckers. So he was in command of combat. Again,

945
00:44:55,280 --> 00:44:57,039
this was like I said, it's not Waterloo, it's not

946
00:44:57,559 --> 00:45:00,440
even like the American Revolution. Like these are small battles.

947
00:45:00,440 --> 00:45:03,480
We're talking like eight hundred verse eight hundred that type

948
00:45:03,519 --> 00:45:08,719
of thing. So tight, close, dirty battles. He was in

949
00:45:08,760 --> 00:45:11,679
command and at the Battle of Type Canoe, combat was heavy,

950
00:45:12,039 --> 00:45:12,760
it was close.

951
00:45:13,239 --> 00:45:13,400
Speaker 3: Uh.

952
00:45:13,440 --> 00:45:16,480
Speaker 2: He also saw heavy combat during the War of eighteen twelve.

953
00:45:16,760 --> 00:45:19,119
It is more likely than not, probably at Typical Canoe

954
00:45:19,239 --> 00:45:20,480
in particular.

955
00:45:20,840 --> 00:45:24,000
Speaker 3: That he called body sure believable.

956
00:45:24,360 --> 00:45:25,840
Speaker 2: Yeah that's all we really know.

957
00:45:26,000 --> 00:45:26,400
Speaker 3: That's it.

958
00:45:26,639 --> 00:45:29,400
Speaker 2: Not superdoctrin about him, but he probably caught a body

959
00:45:29,440 --> 00:45:31,920
at typic ca Nee. Certainly he was right there in

960
00:45:31,960 --> 00:45:34,639
the thicket. Things like on the front line, you.

961
00:45:34,519 --> 00:45:37,320
Speaker 3: Can't you don't escape alive with a mark insom.

962
00:45:38,639 --> 00:45:40,039
Speaker 2: Now, when you're on the front lines and you've got

963
00:45:40,039 --> 00:45:41,960
a pistol, like, you're not not gonna use it really

964
00:45:41,960 --> 00:45:44,280
if you need to. And again things got close, things

965
00:45:44,320 --> 00:45:46,280
got the type of the type of situation where.

966
00:45:46,199 --> 00:45:49,039
Speaker 1: They have guns too, but for the most part they're

967
00:45:49,079 --> 00:45:50,360
trying to take you out hand in hand.

968
00:45:50,440 --> 00:45:52,639
Speaker 2: Yeah, they're gonna They're trying to get into the lot

969
00:45:52,639 --> 00:45:56,199
of men. And so your sword comes in handy, your

970
00:45:56,239 --> 00:45:59,599
pistol comes in handy. Right, It's likely he called body.

971
00:45:59,639 --> 00:46:02,679
Next then that's all we know. Next up Zachary Taylor,

972
00:46:03,119 --> 00:46:06,480
another general who became president and died in office. Him

973
00:46:06,519 --> 00:46:07,920
from eating cherries, I believe.

974
00:46:08,760 --> 00:46:11,199
Speaker 3: Oh no, like a lot of cherries. Yeah, like just

975
00:46:11,599 --> 00:46:12,480
massive diarrhea.

976
00:46:12,840 --> 00:46:16,400
Speaker 2: So, uh, this is a stomach problem. So maybe because.

977
00:46:16,119 --> 00:46:20,000
Speaker 3: It's like if you eat too many, you shit a lot.

978
00:46:20,480 --> 00:46:22,199
Speaker 1: And I don't know, I do recall him spending like

979
00:46:22,519 --> 00:46:25,079
thousands of dollars on cherries, right.

980
00:46:25,400 --> 00:46:28,320
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's a big cherry guy. Cherry and milk, cherries

981
00:46:28,320 --> 00:46:31,440
and milk. Ew I think there were luxuries back then.

982
00:46:31,559 --> 00:46:33,280
Speaker 3: Yeah, I guess. I mean I love cherries, but like

983
00:46:33,320 --> 00:46:34,559
you have to be careful because if.

984
00:46:34,440 --> 00:46:36,559
Speaker 2: You have too many, like arsenic or something.

985
00:46:36,800 --> 00:46:38,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, like you can't have more like you had, Like

986
00:46:38,960 --> 00:46:40,800
I made the mistake and I had like I just

987
00:46:40,840 --> 00:46:43,039
had the bag. Yeah, and I just was I was

988
00:46:43,039 --> 00:46:45,480
like stone and just like eating a bunch of cherries

989
00:46:45,880 --> 00:46:48,119
and then I just like I was just shitting water.

990
00:46:48,159 --> 00:46:50,239
Like it was like I was preparing for a coolnoscopy.

991
00:46:50,320 --> 00:46:54,719
It was it was rough or beach season or beach season. Yeah,

992
00:46:55,039 --> 00:46:56,639
not never enough diarrhea in the summer.

993
00:46:56,840 --> 00:46:57,000
Speaker 1: Never.

994
00:46:57,559 --> 00:47:00,320
Speaker 3: Ugh, that's how That's how Rob got his body.

995
00:47:00,360 --> 00:47:01,280
Speaker 2: My secret.

996
00:47:02,559 --> 00:47:04,000
Speaker 3: Body is just cherries and diarrhea.

997
00:47:04,079 --> 00:47:06,920
Speaker 2: Yeah, pure diarrhea. Body by diarrhea.

998
00:47:06,559 --> 00:47:10,559
Speaker 1: Two weeks before Michigan just hit the cherry tree hard.

999
00:47:11,400 --> 00:47:16,840
Speaker 2: You don't even know. So Taylor saw a ton of combat.

1000
00:47:16,880 --> 00:47:18,679
He was in the War of eighteen twelve. He was

1001
00:47:18,719 --> 00:47:21,519
an officer the whole time, so officers typically, especially back

1002
00:47:21,519 --> 00:47:24,440
in this time, less likely to kill than an officer

1003
00:47:24,519 --> 00:47:27,119
now or like World War two or something like that.

1004
00:47:27,199 --> 00:47:28,880
But fought in the War of eighteen twelve as a

1005
00:47:28,880 --> 00:47:31,760
low ranking officer. The Blackhawk War, second Seminole War, fought

1006
00:47:31,760 --> 00:47:36,000
a bunch of Indians. Taylor also caught a body in

1007
00:47:36,039 --> 00:47:38,159
one of those wars, certainly probably multiple bodies. He was

1008
00:47:38,159 --> 00:47:41,440
in heavy engagements in the War of eighteen twelve in particular.

1009
00:47:41,920 --> 00:47:44,280
We don't know much more about that. He was basically

1010
00:47:44,320 --> 00:47:47,320
the co commanding general when he helped us take all of

1011
00:47:47,360 --> 00:47:51,320
Mexico's land. But it probably didn't catch a body during

1012
00:47:51,360 --> 00:47:52,280
the Mexican American War.

1013
00:47:52,360 --> 00:47:55,199
Speaker 3: Okay, ally, really.

1014
00:47:55,840 --> 00:47:58,840
Speaker 2: He was too high up, too far back. You're not

1015
00:47:59,039 --> 00:48:00,960
like it's like, you know, I and Grant didn't kill

1016
00:48:01,119 --> 00:48:03,960
kill anyone in the Civil War. Like they're not on

1017
00:48:04,000 --> 00:48:04,480
the front line.

1018
00:48:04,519 --> 00:48:06,360
Speaker 3: They're living cush, they're on a horse, they're in a

1019
00:48:06,440 --> 00:48:06,800
nice town.

1020
00:48:07,000 --> 00:48:09,679
Speaker 2: It's just like smoking cigars. Like, how's the battle going. Yeah,

1021
00:48:09,719 --> 00:48:14,239
speaking of Grant, Now we got Grant and this one

1022
00:48:14,280 --> 00:48:15,760
we have a few more details on.

1023
00:48:16,119 --> 00:48:19,360
Speaker 3: Of course, he seems like he like keeps a ledger, like,

1024
00:48:19,400 --> 00:48:22,800
he seems like he's a pretty prodigious journaler.

1025
00:48:23,119 --> 00:48:26,800
Speaker 2: He he is widely considered to have the best presidential

1026
00:48:26,800 --> 00:48:32,039
biography autobiography. Yeah, his his what do you call it?

1027
00:48:32,119 --> 00:48:32,719
Not notes?

1028
00:48:32,840 --> 00:48:37,039
Speaker 1: So nobody from Taylor to Grant you think killed.

1029
00:48:37,880 --> 00:48:40,960
Speaker 2: So I looked at one of the one of the

1030
00:48:41,000 --> 00:48:43,519
people that could have was James Buchanan, but because he

1031
00:48:43,599 --> 00:48:44,880
kind of was in the War of eighteen twelve.

1032
00:48:44,880 --> 00:48:46,400
Speaker 1: But Tyler was also in the war.

1033
00:48:46,679 --> 00:48:49,719
Speaker 2: But he was he was not. I looked into that

1034
00:48:49,760 --> 00:48:53,159
he was he was not doing stuff? Really, gotcha?

1035
00:48:53,400 --> 00:48:55,599
Speaker 1: Let me double check because then I also always get

1036
00:48:55,599 --> 00:48:56,800
Taylor and Tyler mixed up.

1037
00:48:58,039 --> 00:49:01,039
Speaker 2: I'm like one of them in the Mexican America. That's Taylor, yeah,

1038
00:49:01,039 --> 00:49:05,280
Prinus Taylor, yeah yeah, yeah. But Grant So, like I

1039
00:49:05,320 --> 00:49:09,119
just said, Grant didn't kill anyone during the Civil War,

1040
00:49:10,599 --> 00:49:13,519
but he was a very young officer during the Mexican War.

1041
00:49:14,039 --> 00:49:17,440
He saw combat in major battles including the Battle of Monterey,

1042
00:49:17,840 --> 00:49:23,800
the Battle of Molino del Rey, and Chapel Tepic chipolto

1043
00:49:24,079 --> 00:49:27,199
chipolt Yeah, Chipoltopec. I think it's right.

1044
00:49:29,119 --> 00:49:33,239
Speaker 3: Oh, Dan knows how to pronounce something. You're welcome, Wow, shocked,

1045
00:49:33,719 --> 00:49:40,119
so many, so many unique things happening today. Du Yeah,

1046
00:49:40,280 --> 00:49:41,679
Dan can't say words correctly.

1047
00:49:42,159 --> 00:49:43,920
Speaker 2: Dan's drinking does words?

1048
00:49:44,320 --> 00:49:44,559
Speaker 1: Wait?

1049
00:49:44,599 --> 00:49:46,039
Speaker 2: Maybe that's it, just drink.

1050
00:49:46,800 --> 00:49:48,920
Speaker 1: There's a segment on inside CFM.

1051
00:49:49,199 --> 00:49:51,960
Speaker 2: Dan does words, Dan does words? Just was it just

1052
00:49:52,320 --> 00:49:53,800
putting words in front of you and how do you

1053
00:49:53,840 --> 00:49:54,239
read them?

1054
00:49:54,360 --> 00:49:57,199
Speaker 1: Jake reading words and me trying to figure out what

1055
00:49:57,239 --> 00:49:57,599
they mean.

1056
00:49:59,000 --> 00:50:04,239
Speaker 2: That's a mean segment. That's hilarious. That's pretty good. So

1057
00:50:04,800 --> 00:50:09,440
what's interesting about Grant is that he was actually a quartermaster.

1058
00:50:09,960 --> 00:50:10,960
Speaker 3: What's a quartermaster?

1059
00:50:11,400 --> 00:50:14,320
Speaker 2: You're in charge of supplies, which means you're not fighting.

1060
00:50:14,360 --> 00:50:18,440
He's the bootman. Yeah, he makes sure that he's logistics,

1061
00:50:18,480 --> 00:50:22,480
he's what equipment manager. Yes, he's what as someone in

1062
00:50:22,519 --> 00:50:27,400
the army today would call a pogue, a person other

1063
00:50:27,440 --> 00:50:30,760
than grunt. Huh So like not a not a shooter,

1064
00:50:30,960 --> 00:50:36,320
a cook, like that important job. Someone's going to do

1065
00:50:36,400 --> 00:50:41,239
logistics when wars. That's truly how it is. But Grant

1066
00:50:41,760 --> 00:50:44,760
would often leave his little post because he wanted to

1067
00:50:44,840 --> 00:50:45,920
get some He.

1068
00:50:46,039 --> 00:50:48,360
Speaker 3: Was not get some ass or get some action action.

1069
00:50:49,000 --> 00:50:52,360
Speaker 2: He was not content with filling out ledgers and sending

1070
00:50:52,400 --> 00:50:58,039
boots off to the you know, yes, so he would

1071
00:50:58,039 --> 00:51:00,480
go out. There was one battle. He probably get kills

1072
00:51:00,519 --> 00:51:03,360
during this battle, I think it was Monterey, but he

1073
00:51:03,440 --> 00:51:06,000
was like, let me do something. I'm a He's actually

1074
00:51:06,039 --> 00:51:09,119
one of the best horse riders in a US military history,

1075
00:51:09,280 --> 00:51:11,440
like one awards for it. And why did he grow

1076
00:51:11,519 --> 00:51:13,760
up on horse farmers something kind of yeah, I mean

1077
00:51:13,760 --> 00:51:15,920
he had everyone had a horseback them, but he had horses.

1078
00:51:16,840 --> 00:51:20,239
He volunteered, what did he do tricks? He did tricks

1079
00:51:20,280 --> 00:51:20,760
in battle.

1080
00:51:21,199 --> 00:51:24,400
Speaker 3: Sick dude. That's so fucking cool. Yeah, that's pretty cool.

1081
00:51:24,519 --> 00:51:27,960
Speaker 2: He voluntared the battle Battle of Monterey. He volunteered to

1082
00:51:28,079 --> 00:51:32,280
take messages between the two different like lines of the

1083
00:51:32,400 --> 00:51:37,000
US military they were kind of separated or whatever through

1084
00:51:37,039 --> 00:51:39,320
sniper fire. And he would do it on a horse

1085
00:51:39,360 --> 00:51:41,719
by riding on the side of the horse, like folly

1086
00:51:41,840 --> 00:51:44,199
on the side of the horse. Beautiful the US President.

1087
00:51:44,280 --> 00:51:46,280
I love a showman. I do like, this is a

1088
00:51:46,280 --> 00:51:49,039
straight up US president doing horse flips and all.

1089
00:51:49,079 --> 00:51:49,679
Speaker 3: He isn't battle.

1090
00:51:49,760 --> 00:51:50,679
Speaker 2: Pretty fucking bad ass.

1091
00:51:50,679 --> 00:51:51,239
Speaker 3: That's awesome.

1092
00:51:51,360 --> 00:51:52,639
Speaker 1: Essentially a Wild West show.

1093
00:51:52,719 --> 00:51:53,679
Speaker 3: That's so cool.

1094
00:51:54,360 --> 00:51:58,000
Speaker 2: So at the Battle of Chapultepec, Grant probably did get

1095
00:51:58,039 --> 00:51:59,960
his body, so that's probably where it happened. So Grant

1096
00:52:00,079 --> 00:52:04,320
it uh and some people from the fourth Infantry. They

1097
00:52:04,320 --> 00:52:06,960
were this whole like area was being attacked by Mexican

1098
00:52:07,000 --> 00:52:09,960
cavalry and they were trying to repel the attacks. So

1099
00:52:10,039 --> 00:52:14,079
Grant and a couple of his men took a howitzer,

1100
00:52:14,320 --> 00:52:17,599
which is a cannon into the bell tower of the

1101
00:52:17,599 --> 00:52:21,039
San Cosme Church. Uh. And they put it up in

1102
00:52:21,039 --> 00:52:22,960
the you know, up in the bell tower, reassembled, they

1103
00:52:23,000 --> 00:52:26,239
carried it, they disassembed. Yeah, they disassembled it, carried up

1104
00:52:26,280 --> 00:52:30,480
to the bell tower, reassembled it. And Grant was firing

1105
00:52:30,519 --> 00:52:33,519
that cannon down on Mexican troops. So imagine like you know,

1106
00:52:33,559 --> 00:52:35,199
in saving Private Ryan, the guys in the bell tower

1107
00:52:35,239 --> 00:52:39,360
with the sniper rifle, that with a cannon. Fuck, so

1108
00:52:39,400 --> 00:52:45,000
you're like bowling. Yeah, yeah, just black and he was

1109
00:52:45,159 --> 00:52:48,800
I think he he was promoted because of his bravery

1110
00:52:48,920 --> 00:52:51,400
in that battle from what he did. Uh. He also

1111
00:52:51,559 --> 00:52:54,840
led a charge at the Battle of Resaca de la Palma,

1112
00:52:55,400 --> 00:53:00,639
So Lee probably caught a body there too, surely. Yeah,

1113
00:53:01,800 --> 00:53:06,440
so Grant good, I say, Grant a couple bodies at least, Yeah,

1114
00:53:06,639 --> 00:53:09,400
maybe up maybe upwards of twenty. Like I don't really mean,

1115
00:53:09,639 --> 00:53:10,079
I feel like.

1116
00:53:10,000 --> 00:53:12,280
Speaker 3: With the cannon, it's like pretty big, right, Like.

1117
00:53:12,239 --> 00:53:14,239
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, you're taking more than it's not just one.

1118
00:53:14,320 --> 00:53:16,760
Speaker 3: It's like you know you could yes, and especially like

1119
00:53:16,800 --> 00:53:19,199
it explodes on contacts, so like maybe.

1120
00:53:18,960 --> 00:53:21,679
Speaker 2: There's not these cannons. No, these were just a big

1121
00:53:21,719 --> 00:53:25,440
ball before we proceed, I'd like to apologize. James Monroe

1122
00:53:26,360 --> 00:53:31,000
was unfamiliar with your military service. Got wounded in the

1123
00:53:31,000 --> 00:53:35,119
Battle of Trenton. He did. He charged a cannon and

1124
00:53:35,280 --> 00:53:38,360
was ripped to pieces, almost died right there on the battlefield.

1125
00:53:38,480 --> 00:53:39,880
Speaker 1: So nobody, no.

1126
00:53:39,760 --> 00:53:46,400
Speaker 3: No, he was so embarrassing a door that's so stupid, like,

1127
00:53:46,480 --> 00:53:46,960
oh do.

1128
00:53:46,960 --> 00:53:48,239
Speaker 2: You think this thing is? This thing on?

1129
00:53:48,719 --> 00:53:50,920
Speaker 1: But thank you for your service, Jess Monroe.

1130
00:53:51,159 --> 00:53:53,960
Speaker 2: So from the research I was doing, someone was like, oh,

1131
00:53:53,960 --> 00:53:55,679
I think mon Road did because he was like super

1132
00:53:55,760 --> 00:53:58,559
duper on the front lines of the revolution. And then

1133
00:53:58,599 --> 00:54:03,320
someone was like, yeah, but he was and he was

1134
00:54:03,360 --> 00:54:07,480
more in the way. Yeah. Yeah, it's kind of an

1135
00:54:07,519 --> 00:54:13,400
immediate out of action situation. Uh. Next up we have

1136
00:54:13,440 --> 00:54:18,800
Grover Cleveland. Cleveland is my favorite. Okay, Cleveland did not

1137
00:54:18,880 --> 00:54:20,119
catch his bodies in a war.

1138
00:54:21,159 --> 00:54:22,320
Speaker 3: Yes, this is what I wanted.

1139
00:54:22,360 --> 00:54:24,280
Speaker 2: And he did not catch his bodies in a duel.

1140
00:54:24,440 --> 00:54:27,880
Speaker 3: I love it. What was it? Was it petty was

1141
00:54:28,119 --> 00:54:31,559
a woman just to count as murder. If it was

1142
00:54:31,559 --> 00:54:33,559
a woman before she could have she could vote.

1143
00:54:34,400 --> 00:54:37,000
Speaker 2: If it's a woman who's not breeding enough, yeah.

1144
00:54:36,840 --> 00:54:38,639
Speaker 3: If she doesn't have child, if it's a childless woman,

1145
00:54:38,719 --> 00:54:40,880
is it murder or is it a service to society?

1146
00:54:41,039 --> 00:54:43,440
Speaker 2: I think it's just one less mouth, one less mouth,

1147
00:54:43,519 --> 00:54:46,119
you know what I mean? It was the guess what

1148
00:54:46,239 --> 00:54:47,360
in Cleveland.

1149
00:54:47,000 --> 00:54:50,760
Speaker 3: I'm spinster level. I'm definitely I definitely would have been

1150
00:54:50,760 --> 00:54:52,639
tried for witch at this.

1151
00:54:52,639 --> 00:54:57,400
Speaker 1: Point Cleveland called a body stopping a crime.

1152
00:54:59,559 --> 00:55:02,320
Speaker 2: You have right? Ooh, you're half right. He was a

1153
00:55:02,400 --> 00:55:06,159
visual perpetuating a crime. He was the sheriff of Erie County,

1154
00:55:06,199 --> 00:55:09,639
New York, and thus as sheriff.

1155
00:55:09,280 --> 00:55:16,039
Speaker 1: Self appointed, who's batman, he was in charge of executions.

1156
00:55:17,119 --> 00:55:19,280
Speaker 3: Oh so he but he did it, he di white it.

1157
00:55:20,039 --> 00:55:20,280
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1158
00:55:20,320 --> 00:55:22,559
Speaker 3: So he wanted so hard to find a good execution.

1159
00:55:22,639 --> 00:55:25,360
Speaker 2: She wanted to set an example and not have his

1160
00:55:25,440 --> 00:55:28,599
men do anything he wouldn't do, so Ned Stark of him. Yes,

1161
00:55:29,079 --> 00:55:32,599
this is very much a Ned Stark situation. So Cleveland

1162
00:55:32,639 --> 00:55:35,880
caught two bodies as sheriff of Erie County, New York,

1163
00:55:36,280 --> 00:55:40,760
both murderers, one on September sixth, eighteen seventy two. One

1164
00:55:40,800 --> 00:55:45,119
on Valentine's Day eighteen seventy three. He personally executed first

1165
00:55:45,400 --> 00:55:49,719
Patrick Morrissey, who was convicted of murdering his mother, and

1166
00:55:49,760 --> 00:55:52,840
then executed another murderer the year later John Gaffney or

1167
00:55:52,880 --> 00:55:59,519
six months later or whatever. The method hanging you not necessarily.

1168
00:56:00,119 --> 00:56:02,920
Sometimes he probably tied the rope. Sometimes where you kick

1169
00:56:02,920 --> 00:56:06,760
a stool out. Sometimes it's a short box and you

1170
00:56:06,840 --> 00:56:09,360
yank like a pinata, you yank to break the net

1171
00:56:09,400 --> 00:56:10,360
the human pinata.

1172
00:56:10,840 --> 00:56:12,599
Speaker 1: Did you do the research to figure out how he

1173
00:56:12,639 --> 00:56:13,039
killed them?

1174
00:56:13,039 --> 00:56:16,239
Speaker 2: I did not see quite how Cleveland did it. It

1175
00:56:16,320 --> 00:56:18,440
just says by hanging, and he you kicked the box

1176
00:56:18,599 --> 00:56:21,840
and yank or just kicked the box, but he killed him.

1177
00:56:22,079 --> 00:56:23,639
Speaker 3: I feel like kicking the box would be kind of

1178
00:56:23,639 --> 00:56:25,880
hard because it's like there's somebody standing on it like it.

1179
00:56:26,559 --> 00:56:31,000
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, no, be pretty easy, you think, yeah, uh,

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00:56:31,039 --> 00:56:32,960
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me just because I like seeing progress, I like seeing data.

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just chills you out. I like to take it before

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I go to bebby, but a little bit before I

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relax my mind a little bit, just kind of quiet

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the noise. And then I lay in bed, I watch

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But the thing is, so if you do tabletop and

1307
01:03:01,679 --> 01:03:03,920
someone if it's a if it's have you guys ever

1308
01:03:03,920 --> 01:03:07,079
seen Deadwood? Yes, this was the first episode of Deadwood.

1309
01:03:07,119 --> 01:03:09,719
Speaker 1: I've only seen the movie serious.

1310
01:03:10,320 --> 01:03:11,679
Speaker 3: Oh, it was like the movie.

1311
01:03:11,440 --> 01:03:14,079
Speaker 2: Sucks that Timoy the elphant has to hang somebody in

1312
01:03:14,079 --> 01:03:16,719
the first episode and he's like, do me quick, and

1313
01:03:16,760 --> 01:03:18,400
so he didn't want to want choke, so he kicks

1314
01:03:18,440 --> 01:03:21,280
him off the box and then yanks him as hard

1315
01:03:21,280 --> 01:03:22,480
as he can to break his neck.

1316
01:03:22,920 --> 01:03:26,159
Speaker 3: He has because he has stones, because he has morals.

1317
01:03:26,400 --> 01:03:28,639
Speaker 2: And I like to believe that Grover Cleveland yanked.

1318
01:03:29,199 --> 01:03:32,960
Speaker 3: He seems like a yankor yeah, he yanked, and then

1319
01:03:33,000 --> 01:03:36,440
he and then he shanked, and then he sank.

1320
01:03:37,760 --> 01:03:38,599
Speaker 2: No one can say.

1321
01:03:38,639 --> 01:03:42,440
Speaker 3: Pranked, and then he and then after all that was done,

1322
01:03:42,719 --> 01:03:43,199
he drank.

1323
01:03:44,079 --> 01:03:48,679
Speaker 2: Probably Uh, next up, William McKinley. We could make that

1324
01:03:48,719 --> 01:03:50,039
a Doctor Seuss book.

1325
01:03:51,519 --> 01:03:55,079
Speaker 3: The Doctors in his book of Grover Cleveland's share Execution

1326
01:03:55,639 --> 01:03:58,440
A Day in the Life, get ready with me to

1327
01:03:58,480 --> 01:03:59,760
go execute someone?

1328
01:04:00,400 --> 01:04:02,440
Speaker 2: Just like a children's book series of all the presidents,

1329
01:04:02,440 --> 01:04:05,880
but it's all their darkest shit. It's like cute George

1330
01:04:05,920 --> 01:04:10,639
Washington's slave Teeth. It's Thomas Jefferson's bastard children who. But

1331
01:04:10,639 --> 01:04:11,519
I didn't realize this.

1332
01:04:11,480 --> 01:04:12,000
Speaker 1: By the way.

1333
01:04:12,599 --> 01:04:16,599
Speaker 2: Uh. Sally Hemmings three quarters white.

1334
01:04:18,480 --> 01:04:21,559
Speaker 3: I believe it because it's like because.

1335
01:04:21,320 --> 01:04:25,360
Speaker 2: Thomas Jefferson's father in law banged her mom. Wow from

1336
01:04:25,400 --> 01:04:27,599
a long life of slave bangings. Yeah, but so like

1337
01:04:27,639 --> 01:04:30,679
Thomas Jefferson's kids with Sally Hemmings.

1338
01:04:30,280 --> 01:04:31,039
Speaker 3: Were mostly white.

1339
01:04:31,039 --> 01:04:32,400
Speaker 2: They were almost completely white.

1340
01:04:32,480 --> 01:04:34,159
Speaker 3: Yeah, they were white.

1341
01:04:34,199 --> 01:04:36,599
Speaker 2: Could have passed. They did pass. They like several of

1342
01:04:36,639 --> 01:04:39,679
them fully passed, and then the other ones that didn't

1343
01:04:39,679 --> 01:04:41,639
pass as well, I think didn't get freed till later.

1344
01:04:42,079 --> 01:04:44,079
Speaker 3: It must have been even harder to pass because like

1345
01:04:44,719 --> 01:04:47,079
you can't like wear sunscreen when you're working, you know,

1346
01:04:47,159 --> 01:04:49,280
like you can't really protect yourself from getting ten.

1347
01:04:49,639 --> 01:04:51,679
Speaker 2: You know, so everyone's kind of looking for it.

1348
01:04:51,920 --> 01:04:55,039
Speaker 3: Yeah, like they're like, and how do you straighten your hair?

1349
01:04:55,079 --> 01:04:58,000
I guess with an iron there's curly hair back then

1350
01:04:58,519 --> 01:05:01,639
not but like you know, you think the pale. Yeah,

1351
01:05:01,639 --> 01:05:04,039
but like like a you know, like a kinky curly hair.

1352
01:05:04,199 --> 01:05:06,800
It's hard to hard to hard to tame.

1353
01:05:06,920 --> 01:05:10,079
Speaker 2: Yeah, how about an issue?

1354
01:05:10,280 --> 01:05:14,559
Speaker 3: Was some burn you think the probably pretty bad? Do

1355
01:05:14,599 --> 01:05:17,599
you think it would would have died with melanoma at

1356
01:05:17,599 --> 01:05:17,960
this point I.

1357
01:05:17,960 --> 01:05:19,880
Speaker 2: Would have gone outside. First off, I'm the I'm the

1358
01:05:19,960 --> 01:05:24,719
exact fairness of a aristocrat from the time, which means

1359
01:05:24,719 --> 01:05:28,559
I'm not outside in the first place. Secondly, they're all

1360
01:05:28,599 --> 01:05:30,519
working in long sleeves for the most part.

1361
01:05:30,559 --> 01:05:31,800
Speaker 3: Like it's like a yeah, I guess they don't have

1362
01:05:31,840 --> 01:05:32,599
like tank tops.

1363
01:05:32,599 --> 01:05:34,760
Speaker 2: I mean, I mean, let's be honest, though, like look

1364
01:05:34,760 --> 01:05:36,880
at uh if you if you just see any like

1365
01:05:37,239 --> 01:05:39,800
gardener or day laborer out there, they still wear all

1366
01:05:40,480 --> 01:05:42,639
these big ass hats. But you can tell by the hands.

1367
01:05:42,840 --> 01:05:44,559
Oh yes, it's always the hands.

1368
01:05:44,960 --> 01:05:47,360
Speaker 1: Hands give it away, robs hands soft.

1369
01:05:47,760 --> 01:05:49,440
Speaker 3: I know I have more callouses than you.

1370
01:05:49,480 --> 01:05:53,119
Speaker 2: Probably good. I take pride in my soft hands.

1371
01:05:53,960 --> 01:05:55,800
Speaker 1: Mine are manufactured though, you know.

1372
01:05:56,599 --> 01:05:57,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, you go do it to yourself.

1373
01:05:57,960 --> 01:06:02,480
Speaker 3: Yeah, I mean yeah, it's not like earning these callouses

1374
01:06:02,519 --> 01:06:03,760
on for somebody else.

1375
01:06:04,519 --> 01:06:09,440
Speaker 2: These are these are mine. Uh So. William McKinley is next.

1376
01:06:09,920 --> 01:06:11,599
He lived by the sword, he died by the sword.

1377
01:06:13,400 --> 01:06:16,000
He was one of our presidents who was assassinated. But

1378
01:06:16,039 --> 01:06:19,559
before he was assassinated, he saw some ship. He might

1379
01:06:19,599 --> 01:06:23,400
have seen the worst combat of any president that we've had.

1380
01:06:24,280 --> 01:06:25,199
Speaker 1: Kinley was in.

1381
01:06:28,239 --> 01:06:31,320
Speaker 2: World War Civil War, Oh.

1382
01:06:31,880 --> 01:06:33,800
Speaker 3: Specifically, yeah, and you're off your game today.

1383
01:06:34,239 --> 01:06:38,440
Speaker 1: I'm trying to kind of gauge how old he would

1384
01:06:38,480 --> 01:06:38,719
have been.

1385
01:06:39,599 --> 01:06:41,920
Speaker 2: He was a relatively old when he was president, not

1386
01:06:42,000 --> 01:06:44,320
super old, but he was young, and he was young

1387
01:06:44,320 --> 01:06:47,039
when he was in the Civil War. But his unit,

1388
01:06:47,119 --> 01:06:51,239
the twenty third Ohio was right in the fucking thick

1389
01:06:51,320 --> 01:07:00,440
of it in Antietam. Oh shit, absolutely the bloody day

1390
01:07:00,559 --> 01:07:04,320
in US history to date, like brutal, even more than

1391
01:07:04,400 --> 01:07:07,599
nine to eleven. Yes, it did beat it beats nine eleven.

1392
01:07:07,639 --> 01:07:09,800
Speaker 1: Really, Oh by a wide margin.

1393
01:07:10,079 --> 01:07:11,519
Speaker 3: You do a lot of things beat nine eleven.

1394
01:07:11,679 --> 01:07:15,880
Speaker 2: Yeah. No, nine to eleven was like three thousand people. Yeah,

1395
01:07:15,920 --> 01:07:18,239
and Tietam's not much more than that. Nine to eleven,

1396
01:07:18,280 --> 01:07:20,280
I think beat Pearl Harbor or actually it might still

1397
01:07:20,320 --> 01:07:22,079
be behind Pearl Harbor. But nine eleven is like third,

1398
01:07:22,320 --> 01:07:25,559
So like more than those amount of troops died, like

1399
01:07:25,639 --> 01:07:27,440
in a day during World War Two.

1400
01:07:27,400 --> 01:07:29,840
Speaker 3: But like in one place, at one time, one event.

1401
01:07:30,400 --> 01:07:33,719
Speaker 2: Nine to eleven is top three. Interesting, Antietam's number one though,

1402
01:07:34,519 --> 01:07:37,119
Uh And McKinley was right in the thick of it

1403
01:07:37,199 --> 01:07:38,119
during Antietam.

1404
01:07:38,400 --> 01:07:41,199
Speaker 3: Was he an officer or was he just Okay, so.

1405
01:07:41,159 --> 01:07:43,440
Speaker 2: He's on the high with a musket, yeah, grunt, Yeah,

1406
01:07:43,480 --> 01:07:47,360
he's doing shit. Almost certainly caught a body there also

1407
01:07:47,440 --> 01:07:51,320
served on the on the front lines and several other engagements.

1408
01:07:51,920 --> 01:07:55,480
Did get promoted to officer at one point, but still

1409
01:07:55,480 --> 01:07:58,079
the battles he saw were horrible, even even like small

1410
01:07:58,119 --> 01:08:00,679
battles in the Civil War were a fucking nightmare. Like

1411
01:08:01,280 --> 01:08:03,519
you hear about Antietam and Gettysburg, but they were all

1412
01:08:03,639 --> 01:08:09,280
fucking gnarly. Yeah, he said of Cloyd's Mountain, when his

1413
01:08:09,400 --> 01:08:14,440
men charged enemy trenches and drove the rebels from their position.

1414
01:08:14,519 --> 01:08:17,159
McKinley said, of that combat, it was and this is

1415
01:08:17,199 --> 01:08:21,119
after Antietam, it was quote as desperate as any witness

1416
01:08:21,199 --> 01:08:23,720
during the war. So like even in engagements you never

1417
01:08:23,760 --> 01:08:27,319
heard of. It was just the grossest, shittiest fucking combat.

1418
01:08:27,640 --> 01:08:30,199
McKinley right in the middle of it. Never more than

1419
01:08:30,199 --> 01:08:33,359
a junior officer like a lieutenant or I think he

1420
01:08:33,439 --> 01:08:34,399
might have risen further.

1421
01:08:34,479 --> 01:08:38,920
Speaker 1: But what you're right though, there's about thirty six hundred fatalities,

1422
01:08:39,560 --> 01:08:42,640
but twenty three thousand casualties.

1423
01:08:42,640 --> 01:08:43,640
Speaker 2: So twenty three.

1424
01:08:43,319 --> 01:08:47,000
Speaker 1: Thousand people got shot at least like stabbed.

1425
01:08:47,119 --> 01:08:49,880
Speaker 3: Yeah, yikes, that's all long.

1426
01:08:50,000 --> 01:08:51,359
Speaker 2: That was in like five hours.

1427
01:08:52,159 --> 01:08:54,279
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I mean, I guess so I wonder how

1428
01:08:54,279 --> 01:08:57,880
many people died just from like not being urgent enough

1429
01:08:57,920 --> 01:09:01,199
for immediate medical attention, you know, like dying in the

1430
01:09:01,239 --> 01:09:02,039
next few days.

1431
01:09:02,159 --> 01:09:04,479
Speaker 2: So yeah, the amount of people because like there's not

1432
01:09:04,600 --> 01:09:07,239
enough who died in the staff. The amount of like

1433
01:09:07,359 --> 01:09:10,239
battle casualties in the Civil War, it would have been

1434
01:09:10,319 --> 01:09:12,039
half that if it happened to World War two. Yeah,

1435
01:09:12,159 --> 01:09:15,239
like just from their wounds that weren't properly treated or

1436
01:09:15,319 --> 01:09:18,760
affected or whatever. Handwashing. Yeah, all kinds of fun ship. Like.

1437
01:09:18,800 --> 01:09:21,600
Speaker 1: Also, I'll admit it, I thought the word casualty meant

1438
01:09:21,720 --> 01:09:23,880
deaths until about like a year and a half, ten

1439
01:09:23,960 --> 01:09:24,520
years ago.

1440
01:09:25,199 --> 01:09:27,840
Speaker 2: Yeah, people trying to kind of bump bump it up

1441
01:09:27,840 --> 01:09:30,399
by saying casualties and then they just let you.

1442
01:09:30,720 --> 01:09:32,239
Speaker 1: I don't like it, don't care for it.

1443
01:09:32,319 --> 01:09:34,000
Speaker 2: Also, it's kind of funny that it's casualty.

1444
01:09:34,119 --> 01:09:35,560
Speaker 3: Is like it has the word casual in it, like

1445
01:09:35,600 --> 01:09:37,359
it's no big deal, but it's like kind of a.

1446
01:09:37,359 --> 01:09:39,960
Speaker 2: Big deal, exactly the exact opposite of casual Yeah.

1447
01:09:40,000 --> 01:09:43,840
Speaker 1: In fact, there's casualties and fatalities, so that kind of

1448
01:09:44,039 --> 01:09:45,279
counterbalances each other.

1449
01:09:45,479 --> 01:09:47,439
Speaker 3: Yeah, fatal but if you if you say it in

1450
01:09:47,439 --> 01:09:50,439
the same breath, but if you just say casualties, it Intentially,

1451
01:09:50,840 --> 01:09:51,960
people fatally.

1452
01:09:51,600 --> 01:09:53,079
Speaker 2: Leave the battle, and some people just kind of.

1453
01:09:53,000 --> 01:09:56,920
Speaker 3: Casually, casually walk down on a stretch one leg less

1454
01:09:57,000 --> 01:09:57,760
than they entered.

1455
01:09:57,800 --> 01:10:00,359
Speaker 1: And that's how I'm going to forever remember, you know, I.

1456
01:10:00,319 --> 01:10:05,239
Speaker 2: Lost forty pounds? What do I do it? Also? Did

1457
01:10:05,239 --> 01:10:08,159
in those cherries or amputation? Yeah? Cherries and your diary

1458
01:10:08,279 --> 01:10:11,199
and amputation. Yeah, that's the way to do it.

1459
01:10:11,800 --> 01:10:13,960
Speaker 3: Uh, doctors, hat is one trick.

1460
01:10:15,359 --> 01:10:20,119
Speaker 2: McKinley absolutely caught bodies. He was in horrible, horrible combat.

1461
01:10:20,880 --> 01:10:24,039
I have no doubt he got bodies. Next up is

1462
01:10:24,079 --> 01:10:26,680
the man who replaced McKinley in the office because McKinley

1463
01:10:26,720 --> 01:10:32,079
was assassinated, Teddy Roosevelt. This the youngest US president Roosevelt.

1464
01:10:32,199 --> 01:10:34,359
Speaker 1: Yeah, the youngest US president ever.

1465
01:10:35,600 --> 01:10:36,720
Speaker 3: Cute? How old was he?

1466
01:10:36,960 --> 01:10:39,880
Speaker 2: Forty two? Forty one? Nice? But he was elected.

1467
01:10:40,000 --> 01:10:42,920
Speaker 1: If Trump wins and JEDDI Vance gets in, he'll be

1468
01:10:42,960 --> 01:10:43,399
the youngest.

1469
01:10:44,199 --> 01:10:47,239
Speaker 2: If Trump wins dies in office in Dvance, it's.

1470
01:10:47,119 --> 01:10:47,800
Speaker 3: A lot of ifs.

1471
01:10:47,880 --> 01:10:50,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, a lot of ifs. But uh dies or it

1472
01:10:50,680 --> 01:10:52,399
gets I don't know, whatever.

1473
01:10:52,159 --> 01:10:54,159
Speaker 1: There's a possibility because Vance is what in his thirties,

1474
01:10:54,199 --> 01:10:56,039
he's thirty nine. Really, he's got some.

1475
01:10:56,039 --> 01:10:59,680
Speaker 2: Years are you thirty eight? Okay, right, you could be

1476
01:11:00,119 --> 01:11:02,359
watching a super Bowl highlight earlier today of John Elway

1477
01:11:02,359 --> 01:11:05,760
in the Super Bowl. Old ask John Elway in his

1478
01:11:06,000 --> 01:11:07,680
Super Bowl he won? He was thirty seven.

1479
01:11:09,199 --> 01:11:11,800
Speaker 3: That's so old to be playing in a super Bowl

1480
01:11:12,680 --> 01:11:14,039
thirty seven?

1481
01:11:14,039 --> 01:11:16,880
Speaker 1: When did John Alway do the vortext commercials?

1482
01:11:16,880 --> 01:11:18,479
Speaker 3: Probably is he the one that had the they had

1483
01:11:18,520 --> 01:11:20,439
the first phone, which is the team that had the

1484
01:11:20,439 --> 01:11:22,199
first phone on?

1485
01:11:22,640 --> 01:11:25,920
Speaker 1: Joe Horn with the Saints, Okay was it?

1486
01:11:26,239 --> 01:11:28,239
Speaker 3: No, it was somebody else and he was like calling

1487
01:11:28,279 --> 01:11:29,880
his wife during the Super Bowl.

1488
01:11:31,960 --> 01:11:35,479
Speaker 1: That yes, yes day Joe Horn put was a cell

1489
01:11:35,560 --> 01:11:39,039
phone out of the goal post though for a touchdown celebration.

1490
01:11:39,239 --> 01:11:41,920
He did what he pulled a cell phone out of

1491
01:11:41,960 --> 01:11:44,479
the goal post for a touchdown celebration.

1492
01:11:44,439 --> 01:11:46,319
Speaker 2: To like call someone and be like a score touch

1493
01:11:46,399 --> 01:11:48,359
Did he like put his phone in there? Hit his

1494
01:11:48,359 --> 01:11:55,319
phone in the hilarious So Roosevelt is another one that

1495
01:11:55,359 --> 01:11:59,640
we have absolute confirmation, oh yeah, that he killed someone.

1496
01:12:00,039 --> 01:12:03,800
This is the third that we have the absolute confirmations,

1497
01:12:04,600 --> 01:12:07,359
not only forget just oh yeah, rough.

1498
01:12:07,239 --> 01:12:11,319
Speaker 1: Riders boom boom boom, boom boom.

1499
01:12:12,319 --> 01:12:17,920
Speaker 2: It's in his Medal of Honor commentation. H shut him down,

1500
01:12:18,000 --> 01:12:24,479
open up shot. Oh we didn't get here on YouTube.

1501
01:12:25,000 --> 01:12:26,840
Speaker 1: I was just kind of doing a little background for

1502
01:12:26,840 --> 01:12:28,960
you to like do your Okay, you do the whole

1503
01:12:28,960 --> 01:12:31,359
thing as we kind of dmxit in the back.

1504
01:12:31,560 --> 01:12:33,720
Speaker 2: Look, there's nothing I would love more than do an

1505
01:12:33,720 --> 01:12:38,760
a cappella episode, just me, me narrating while there's a

1506
01:12:38,760 --> 01:12:39,520
cappella backing.

1507
01:12:39,800 --> 01:12:43,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, We're just providing all I want them.

1508
01:12:44,960 --> 01:12:48,560
Speaker 2: So I'm gonna read you, Teddy Roosevelt's Medal of Honor commendation. Now,

1509
01:12:48,600 --> 01:12:51,319
this is not the only body of Roosevelt caught, I imagine.

1510
01:12:51,560 --> 01:12:53,439
This is just this is the one that we know

1511
01:12:53,640 --> 01:12:57,680
for sure he caught. This is the third president who

1512
01:12:57,680 --> 01:12:59,920
we have one hundred percent confirmation he killed. I saw

1513
01:13:00,239 --> 01:13:00,520
thing too.

1514
01:13:00,560 --> 01:13:03,479
Speaker 1: You had to die for the Medal of Honor that man,

1515
01:13:04,039 --> 01:13:05,199
But no, ted he lived.

1516
01:13:06,199 --> 01:13:11,399
Speaker 2: So of Roosevelt, it says for conspicuous gallantry and intrepidity,

1517
01:13:11,520 --> 01:13:14,800
intrepidity at the risk of his life, above and beyond

1518
01:13:14,840 --> 01:13:18,199
the call of duty. Lieutenant Colonel Theodore Roosevelt distinguished himself

1519
01:13:18,199 --> 01:13:20,399
by acts of bravery on the first of July eighteen

1520
01:13:20,479 --> 01:13:24,159
ninety eight, near San Diego, Santiago de Cuba, Republic of

1521
01:13:24,199 --> 01:13:27,199
Cuba while leading a daring charge up San Juan Hill.

1522
01:13:27,359 --> 01:13:31,000
Lieutenant Colonel Roosevelt, in total disregard for his personal safety

1523
01:13:31,199 --> 01:13:34,880
and accompanied by only four or five men, led a

1524
01:13:34,920 --> 01:13:38,399
desperate and gallant charge up San Juan Hill, encouraging his

1525
01:13:38,439 --> 01:13:41,640
troops to continue the assault through withering enemy fire over

1526
01:13:42,000 --> 01:13:46,159
open countryside. Facing the enemy's heavy fire, he displayed extraordinary

1527
01:13:46,159 --> 01:13:48,680
bravery through the charge and was the first to reach

1528
01:13:48,720 --> 01:13:51,199
the enemy trenches, where he quickly killed one of the

1529
01:13:51,279 --> 01:13:54,319
enemy with his pistol, allowing his men to continue the assault.

1530
01:13:54,439 --> 01:13:56,600
His leadership and valor turned the tide in the battle

1531
01:13:56,640 --> 01:13:59,479
for San Juan Hill. Lieutenant Colonel Roosevelt's extraordinary herosm and

1532
01:13:59,520 --> 01:14:03,079
devotion to doty or in keeping with the highest traditions.

1533
01:14:03,119 --> 01:14:06,840
Blah blah blah. So in his commendation confirmed kill not

1534
01:14:06,960 --> 01:14:08,640
the only kill he had that day, I assume, not

1535
01:14:08,680 --> 01:14:10,640
the only kill in the war he had, I assume,

1536
01:14:10,920 --> 01:14:14,479
But Roosevelt confirmed body on San Juan Hill.

1537
01:14:14,960 --> 01:14:18,680
Speaker 3: I just love all the the adjectives that they use, right,

1538
01:14:18,960 --> 01:14:21,159
like they really dress it up, and like you know,

1539
01:14:21,199 --> 01:14:24,000
in total disregard for his personal There was another funny

1540
01:14:24,000 --> 01:14:28,199
one in there of just like insulting adjectives like this

1541
01:14:28,279 --> 01:14:30,760
fucking idiot can't believe he did it, But because he did,

1542
01:14:30,760 --> 01:14:32,439
here's the metal risk of his.

1543
01:14:32,399 --> 01:14:34,880
Speaker 2: Life, above and beyond the call of duty, above.

1544
01:14:34,640 --> 01:14:37,960
Speaker 3: And beyond back when men were men.

1545
01:14:38,760 --> 01:14:42,119
Speaker 2: Bully, this is like I need to do. I want

1546
01:14:42,119 --> 01:14:43,880
to do an audio sketch on Patreon where I'm just

1547
01:14:43,880 --> 01:14:46,920
Teddy Roosevelt get wanting to get into a fight for nobody.

1548
01:14:47,079 --> 01:14:51,079
Just something Bully Russell Crowe fighting around the world pretty much,

1549
01:14:51,079 --> 01:14:54,039
it's Teddy Roosevelt fighting around the world, Like Teddy Roosevelt

1550
01:14:54,079 --> 01:14:56,439
just wants to beat the shit out of a bear,

1551
01:14:56,520 --> 01:15:00,640
and it does just for the sake of ever go. Well, yeah, now,

1552
01:15:00,680 --> 01:15:03,000
I mean he definitely has like the most exotic animals

1553
01:15:03,039 --> 01:15:06,199
that were killed in office, right, one would think he

1554
01:15:06,239 --> 01:15:10,119
had a lot of weird animals just wandering around the

1555
01:15:10,119 --> 01:15:10,920
White House too.

1556
01:15:11,600 --> 01:15:14,000
Speaker 3: That's it. That's the like, that's something I would do.

1557
01:15:14,119 --> 01:15:16,000
Like it's like the point of that high of an

1558
01:15:16,039 --> 01:15:17,640
office is like no one's gonna tell you no, so

1559
01:15:17,760 --> 01:15:19,720
you can have whatever animals you want, and like you

1560
01:15:19,720 --> 01:15:21,199
don't even really have to do all the grunt work.

1561
01:15:21,520 --> 01:15:23,399
Speaker 2: Somebody else takes care of them, like the.

1562
01:15:23,399 --> 01:15:25,079
Speaker 3: Queen and all her corkies. I bet those are the

1563
01:15:25,119 --> 01:15:26,640
worst behaved corkies.

1564
01:15:27,520 --> 01:15:30,199
Speaker 2: Oh, I'm sure they're complete assholes, fucking dicks. Yeah, he

1565
01:15:30,239 --> 01:15:33,840
had dogs, cats, guinea pigs, ponies all wandering around. I

1566
01:15:33,880 --> 01:15:35,359
think he had a racon someone had a raccoon.

1567
01:15:35,399 --> 01:15:37,840
Speaker 1: I thought it was I mean, essentially, that's what Middle

1568
01:15:37,880 --> 01:15:38,800
Eastern princes do.

1569
01:15:39,319 --> 01:15:41,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, twenty falcons. Have you seen the picture of the

1570
01:15:41,920 --> 01:15:44,439
Saudi prince who has all his falcons on a plane? Yes?

1571
01:15:44,760 --> 01:15:48,239
Speaker 3: Yes, and they all have their own seats. Yes, yes,

1572
01:15:48,560 --> 01:15:49,079
I love it.

1573
01:15:49,640 --> 01:15:51,319
Speaker 2: I want to party with the Saudi prince. That's just

1574
01:15:51,319 --> 01:15:55,840
like at this point. Uh. Next up is the president

1575
01:15:55,880 --> 01:15:58,359
who probably has more kills than any other US president,

1576
01:15:58,399 --> 01:16:02,159
George Bush close But no.

1577
01:16:02,159 --> 01:16:07,840
Speaker 1: Cigar, it's not HW no, although actually it might be

1578
01:16:08,000 --> 01:16:11,920
HW not hand in hand, but between his like intelligence work.

1579
01:16:12,439 --> 01:16:16,399
Speaker 2: Oh well, if you want to count orders, well, it's

1580
01:16:16,399 --> 01:16:20,640
got to be Fdr Truman, Truman or F Well Truman

1581
01:16:20,720 --> 01:16:24,760
is the one I'm about to talk about. H Yeah,

1582
01:16:24,800 --> 01:16:27,039
but Truman didn't pull that lever on the atomic bomb.

1583
01:16:27,079 --> 01:16:29,079
We're talking about Truman when he was in the military,

1584
01:16:29,439 --> 01:16:32,359
because he commanded an artillery unit in World War One.

1585
01:16:32,920 --> 01:16:35,520
And he was personally pulling triggers on cannons.

1586
01:16:35,920 --> 01:16:39,880
Speaker 1: Truman is exactly how he's portrayed in Oppenheimer.

1587
01:16:40,119 --> 01:16:43,600
Speaker 2: Yeah, have you seen Oppenheimer. He's just like a So

1588
01:16:43,840 --> 01:16:45,920
Truman was the last president to not go to college.

1589
01:16:47,279 --> 01:16:51,520
Kind of amazing forty five, forty six, forty seve mean,

1590
01:16:51,520 --> 01:16:53,880
he was in World War One, but when he was presidents.

1591
01:16:53,520 --> 01:16:56,399
Speaker 1: Like well, he also wasn't elected. FDR died in office.

1592
01:16:56,640 --> 01:16:59,640
Speaker 2: He was eventually elected, right, but first term he was not. Yeah,

1593
01:16:59,640 --> 01:17:03,319
he was FDR Vice president. He was the commander of

1594
01:17:03,359 --> 01:17:08,600
an artillery unit in World War One and saw both

1595
01:17:09,039 --> 01:17:14,920
close combat and also helped fire off batteries when necessary.

1596
01:17:15,119 --> 01:17:18,199
In a battle called the Battle of Who Run, his

1597
01:17:18,279 --> 01:17:22,199
soldiers were attacked suddenly in the night. Germans were overrunning

1598
01:17:22,199 --> 01:17:24,840
the position. Truman succeeded at ordering his men to stay

1599
01:17:24,880 --> 01:17:28,800
in the fight by using horrible profanity, allegedly from his

1600
01:17:28,920 --> 01:17:32,439
quote Railroad Days. The men were the men were so

1601
01:17:32,560 --> 01:17:35,079
impressed with his cursing that they just forgot the Germans

1602
01:17:35,119 --> 01:17:36,800
were shooting animal creative curse.

1603
01:17:36,880 --> 01:17:38,680
Speaker 1: I mean, he's just hanging out with the Chinese and

1604
01:17:38,720 --> 01:17:41,079
Irish too long, and it's yeah, ReBs.

1605
01:17:40,800 --> 01:17:41,399
Speaker 2: Off it does.

1606
01:17:41,479 --> 01:17:45,439
Speaker 3: It does earn trust. It's proven scientifically that if you curse,

1607
01:17:45,640 --> 01:17:48,560
people trust you more. Yeah, they were like, you're more relatable.

1608
01:17:48,680 --> 01:17:51,920
Speaker 2: Yeah. His unit was also part of a massive pre

1609
01:17:52,039 --> 01:17:57,399
arranged assault barrage before the meuse Argonne offensive, so one

1610
01:17:57,439 --> 01:17:59,439
of the biggest offensive at the end of the war.

1611
01:17:59,640 --> 01:18:01,800
So he was part of shooting off the cannons that

1612
01:18:01,920 --> 01:18:05,640
killed a whole bunch of Germans and trenches. Truman also

1613
01:18:05,720 --> 01:18:08,640
at one point saved a bunch of lives while killing

1614
01:18:08,680 --> 01:18:12,279
a bunch of other people. He saw German battery setting

1615
01:18:12,319 --> 01:18:15,199
up to shoot so that they could fire on the

1616
01:18:15,319 --> 01:18:18,079
twenty eighth Division, which is like near his people, and

1617
01:18:18,359 --> 01:18:21,279
Truman ordered his guys to just start ragining fucking helling them,

1618
01:18:21,279 --> 01:18:22,960
even though he didn't have orders to do it, and

1619
01:18:23,000 --> 01:18:24,680
he got in trouble for it, but he killed every

1620
01:18:25,000 --> 01:18:28,079
the entire artillery unit that was setting up. Again, he

1621
01:18:28,159 --> 01:18:30,960
was part of working some of the batteries and probably

1622
01:18:31,000 --> 01:18:34,640
pulled triggers from time to time, not consistently, but Truman's

1623
01:18:34,640 --> 01:18:38,119
probably got a good amount of bodies just working in

1624
01:18:38,239 --> 01:18:40,800
artillery piece in World War One. That is where most

1625
01:18:40,840 --> 01:18:43,680
of the kills came from. His artillery so Harry Truman,

1626
01:18:45,000 --> 01:18:49,479
body after body and then obviously you know, okay, two

1627
01:18:49,600 --> 01:18:52,479
nukes on Japan, which you didn't drop the bomb? Yeah

1628
01:18:52,680 --> 01:18:54,880
I did. No one's going to give a shit who

1629
01:18:54,920 --> 01:18:57,039
made it? I dropped.

1630
01:18:57,880 --> 01:19:01,079
Speaker 3: I want to watch it. It's just been there hasn't

1631
01:19:01,119 --> 01:19:02,960
been a good three hour stretch from like what it

1632
01:19:03,000 --> 01:19:03,520
seems like.

1633
01:19:04,159 --> 01:19:05,439
Speaker 1: It's like it's pace.

1634
01:19:05,600 --> 01:19:07,880
Speaker 2: Every scene is like a minute. Yeah it is. The

1635
01:19:07,920 --> 01:19:12,000
pacing's insane. I was like stunned by the pacing. Gerald

1636
01:19:12,079 --> 01:19:14,159
Ford got someone World War two, but I'm not sure

1637
01:19:14,159 --> 01:19:16,920
he has a kill, so I'm gonna skip him. He worked,

1638
01:19:17,119 --> 01:19:19,000
he was on an aircraft, carried had a couple jobs,

1639
01:19:19,039 --> 01:19:22,439
including an anti aircraft battery, so he definitely shot at

1640
01:19:22,439 --> 01:19:25,880
people trying to kill him. But who knows. It's too

1641
01:19:25,960 --> 01:19:30,760
if he a proposition to say for sure, last got

1642
01:19:30,920 --> 01:19:36,960
HW not Candy. No, I look into Kennedy. Probably no

1643
01:19:37,079 --> 01:19:40,920
kills on PT one O nine, certainly, even.

1644
01:19:40,720 --> 01:19:43,039
Speaker 3: If he did, he just went to confession. Yeah, and

1645
01:19:43,039 --> 01:19:44,199
then and then they were absolved.

1646
01:19:44,239 --> 01:19:47,239
Speaker 2: Yeah, it doesn't count. Uh. He saw action and was

1647
01:19:47,239 --> 01:19:50,199
in very dangerous situations and did heroic things. But from

1648
01:19:50,239 --> 01:19:52,680
what I can tell, I didn't see any evidence of

1649
01:19:52,720 --> 01:19:55,640
a kill. He could, but I didn't. I couldn't find

1650
01:19:55,680 --> 01:20:02,199
anything even great about it. Gotcha. Bush though, flew fifty

1651
01:20:02,279 --> 01:20:05,560
eight combat missions in the Pacific in World War Two.

1652
01:20:05,840 --> 01:20:11,760
He was what he was, a bomber pilot based off

1653
01:20:11,760 --> 01:20:15,319
a carrier, the USS San Jacinto in the Pacific theater.

1654
01:20:15,359 --> 01:20:17,319
In the Navy in World War two. It was a

1655
01:20:17,479 --> 01:20:21,680
Grumming TBF Avenger. It's a torpedo bomber, so you took

1656
01:20:21,680 --> 01:20:23,920
off from an aircraft carrier. They would sometimes the would

1657
01:20:23,960 --> 01:20:26,880
use torpedo, sometimes they drop regular bombs. I would imagine

1658
01:20:26,960 --> 01:20:31,399
his lanky physique, yeah, earned him the nickname in the

1659
01:20:31,479 --> 01:20:33,279
Navy skin.

1660
01:20:34,920 --> 01:20:37,960
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, it's also weird that. Yeah, he is kind

1661
01:20:37,960 --> 01:20:39,079
of tall for a pilot.

1662
01:20:40,039 --> 01:20:43,279
Speaker 3: Yeah, the lanky slender slender man.

1663
01:20:44,199 --> 01:20:47,039
Speaker 2: That is not a good It's the type of nickname

1664
01:20:47,079 --> 01:20:48,600
you get if you kill a lot of people. I

1665
01:20:48,600 --> 01:20:50,520
feel like it sounds like someone that kills a lot

1666
01:20:50,560 --> 01:20:50,840
of people.

1667
01:20:50,880 --> 01:20:52,720
Speaker 3: Yeah, like you have. I don't know.

1668
01:20:52,840 --> 01:20:56,159
Speaker 2: He was six to two hw so, Yeah, dude a.

1669
01:20:56,119 --> 01:20:57,319
Speaker 3: Bitch compared to Washington.

1670
01:20:57,600 --> 01:21:00,359
Speaker 2: They're not letting like a five to five dude run

1671
01:21:00,399 --> 01:21:01,159
the CIA.

1672
01:21:01,279 --> 01:21:02,560
Speaker 3: Who's the shortest president?

1673
01:21:03,520 --> 01:21:04,800
Speaker 2: Uh Madison?

1674
01:21:05,800 --> 01:21:08,159
Speaker 3: Yeah, probably because I feel like people don't want a

1675
01:21:08,239 --> 01:21:10,159
short like you. You want to elect a guy that's

1676
01:21:10,199 --> 01:21:11,960
like manly and masculine.

1677
01:21:13,319 --> 01:21:15,880
Speaker 2: Tallest president was Lincoln at six to four five.

1678
01:21:15,800 --> 01:21:17,119
Speaker 3: Four is very short.

1679
01:21:17,279 --> 01:21:18,680
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, he wouldn't win today.

1680
01:21:18,720 --> 01:21:19,239
Speaker 3: He wouldn't win.

1681
01:21:19,319 --> 01:21:20,600
Speaker 2: To no, we would never win today.

1682
01:21:21,159 --> 01:21:24,199
Speaker 3: Like just a handshake alone, the handshake at the debate

1683
01:21:24,279 --> 01:21:27,000
next to a normal sizement, like that would crush him

1684
01:21:27,039 --> 01:21:29,800
ten points in the polls, lost right there easily, just

1685
01:21:29,920 --> 01:21:31,840
little baby. Yeah.

1686
01:21:31,600 --> 01:21:33,439
Speaker 1: Yeah, he would get padded on the head, no doubt,

1687
01:21:33,520 --> 01:21:34,079
like Trump would.

1688
01:21:34,399 --> 01:21:36,359
Speaker 2: My god, it would be Yeah.

1689
01:21:36,680 --> 01:21:39,640
Speaker 3: There's no recovering, no recovering from being five four. Yeah. No,

1690
01:21:39,640 --> 01:21:42,920
no personality or dance skills or income could offset that.

1691
01:21:43,079 --> 01:21:47,279
Speaker 2: Oh yeah. So Uh. In one of Bush's many engagements UH,

1692
01:21:47,319 --> 01:21:52,279
an attack on a Japanese installation, he successfully hit several targets,

1693
01:21:52,279 --> 01:21:56,680
but his plane was taken down by enemy fire. His

1694
01:21:56,800 --> 01:21:59,279
crew members died, but Bush was able to bail out

1695
01:21:59,279 --> 01:22:02,840
from the aircraft. UH. Several other planes on that same

1696
01:22:02,880 --> 01:22:05,119
mission if you know this, were also shot down and

1697
01:22:05,119 --> 01:22:09,560
the pilots were captured and executed and eaten by the Japanese. Eaten.

1698
01:22:10,079 --> 01:22:13,680
So George HW. Bush could have been a pow is

1699
01:22:13,760 --> 01:22:16,000
close to being eaten by Japanese soldiers.

1700
01:22:16,880 --> 01:22:18,640
Speaker 3: I'm so glad he wasn't, because then we'd never have

1701
01:22:19,279 --> 01:22:21,960
George W's beautiful watercolors.

1702
01:22:21,439 --> 01:22:24,199
Speaker 2: Exactly as the world wouldn't have we never have that

1703
01:22:24,239 --> 01:22:28,279
image of Hw at an Astros game holding a baseball.

1704
01:22:29,239 --> 01:22:31,560
Speaker 3: Yeah, does it look like he doesn't know how to

1705
01:22:31,600 --> 01:22:31,960
hold it.

1706
01:22:32,079 --> 01:22:35,920
Speaker 1: No, he's just on his deathbed essentially, which.

1707
01:22:35,720 --> 01:22:37,640
Speaker 2: Is sad because he does know how to hold a baseball.

1708
01:22:37,640 --> 01:22:40,000
He's a D one athlete and also pitched for Yale.

1709
01:22:40,079 --> 01:22:42,479
Speaker 1: It's around the same time that some woman accused him

1710
01:22:42,560 --> 01:22:45,720
of like groping her, like at that age, but he

1711
01:22:45,800 --> 01:22:47,239
had no idea where he was.

1712
01:22:47,399 --> 01:22:51,760
Speaker 2: Like like he was just like someone tried to someone

1713
01:22:51,800 --> 01:22:55,119
tried to meet to ninety three year old George hw.

1714
01:22:54,760 --> 01:22:56,359
Speaker 3: Bush in like the eighties or nineties.

1715
01:22:56,439 --> 01:22:59,399
Speaker 2: No, like at that time when he was twenty twelve.

1716
01:23:00,439 --> 01:23:02,880
They were like, he groped me, and everyone was like

1717
01:23:03,560 --> 01:23:04,640
he's senile.

1718
01:23:04,800 --> 01:23:08,399
Speaker 3: Yeah, he's alone, that's what he doesn't have the dexterity

1719
01:23:08,560 --> 01:23:09,119
for groping.

1720
01:23:09,760 --> 01:23:11,560
Speaker 2: Yeah, there was this one situation. I don't know if

1721
01:23:11,560 --> 01:23:13,399
you've heard about this a while back, but it made

1722
01:23:13,399 --> 01:23:20,079
me really annoyed some women like tried to shame me too,

1723
01:23:20,119 --> 01:23:24,279
whatever Gary Busey for groping them at a photo event,

1724
01:23:24,439 --> 01:23:26,279
Like you could go take pictures with Gary Busey. Yea,

1725
01:23:26,920 --> 01:23:30,199
and he probably did it. But here's my thing with

1726
01:23:30,239 --> 01:23:33,399
that is like people were only there to take pictures

1727
01:23:33,439 --> 01:23:35,800
with him. This is what he looks like you You

1728
01:23:35,840 --> 01:23:40,199
were only there to take pictures with Gary Busey. Yeah.

1729
01:23:41,479 --> 01:23:43,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, Oh.

1730
01:23:44,439 --> 01:23:47,760
Speaker 2: The sexual predator can take many forms, and that isn't

1731
01:23:47,760 --> 01:23:48,319
one of them.

1732
01:23:48,520 --> 01:23:48,760
Speaker 3: Yeah.

1733
01:23:49,119 --> 01:23:51,319
Speaker 2: Oh no, poor guy.

1734
01:23:53,520 --> 01:23:57,640
Speaker 3: And the astros orange socky and his little khakis. Those shoes,

1735
01:23:57,840 --> 01:24:00,199
like the tread is completely unworn. Like those shoes I've

1736
01:24:00,199 --> 01:24:00,560
never touched.

1737
01:24:00,600 --> 01:24:04,119
Speaker 2: That I've never touched payer. Yeah, but the Gary Busey thing,

1738
01:24:04,119 --> 01:24:06,159
it was like he was accused of groping numb or whatever.

1739
01:24:06,159 --> 01:24:08,279
He probably did, But you were at an event to

1740
01:24:08,319 --> 01:24:10,319
take a photo with Gary Busey. You kind of consent

1741
01:24:10,399 --> 01:24:13,039
to groping the only being there. The only reason you're

1742
01:24:13,039 --> 01:24:16,000
there is because you think it's funny that he's insane. Yeah, So,

1743
01:24:16,319 --> 01:24:20,840
like imagine getting angry at a circus bear from mauling

1744
01:24:20,840 --> 01:24:22,359
you when you try to take a picture with the.

1745
01:24:22,359 --> 01:24:24,520
Speaker 3: Circuit But it's like, no, it's like being mad that,

1746
01:24:24,600 --> 01:24:27,000
Like you're taking a picture next to like a horse

1747
01:24:27,039 --> 01:24:29,079
on Sixth Street and being mad that the horse like shits.

1748
01:24:29,079 --> 01:24:32,279
It's like, right, that's you're you're in the line of fire.

1749
01:24:32,399 --> 01:24:33,439
That's just what they do.

1750
01:24:33,760 --> 01:24:36,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, that's like Gary, but your take and you're only

1751
01:24:36,399 --> 01:24:39,159
there because he's crazy. Yeah, and then he did something

1752
01:24:39,199 --> 01:24:41,800
crazy and you're mad. I mean groping. It's like you're

1753
01:24:41,800 --> 01:24:45,399
not there for poor grow up. Groping is just not cancelable.

1754
01:24:45,439 --> 01:24:48,960
Speaker 3: I'm sorry, Like not for an insane person or like

1755
01:24:49,039 --> 01:24:50,279
unless it's like a child.

1756
01:24:50,359 --> 01:24:53,000
Speaker 1: But it's like, yeah, I don't totally agree with what

1757
01:24:53,199 --> 01:24:56,199
Rob's arguing, but yeah, definitely hw because he has no

1758
01:24:56,239 --> 01:24:57,439
idea where he was at that.

1759
01:24:57,359 --> 01:25:00,960
Speaker 3: Point, he could just take the compliment. Oh, Gary Busey

1760
01:25:01,000 --> 01:25:03,199
thought I had a good ass. Sounds nice.

1761
01:25:03,319 --> 01:25:05,560
Speaker 2: I don't think Gary Busey was trying to feel if

1762
01:25:05,560 --> 01:25:06,600
you were a demon or not.

1763
01:25:06,760 --> 01:25:09,119
Speaker 3: It's all it really was was trying to extract your soul.

1764
01:25:09,199 --> 01:25:11,239
Speaker 2: Yeah, like Gary Busey wanted to make sure you were real.

1765
01:25:11,479 --> 01:25:14,600
Speaker 3: Yeah, like that's that he was real. This is really happening.

1766
01:25:14,680 --> 01:25:17,279
Speaker 2: Yeah, Uh, that's all I got for today. Those are

1767
01:25:17,319 --> 01:25:20,159
all the presidents we know for sure snatched a life

1768
01:25:20,159 --> 01:25:21,239
with their bare hands?

1769
01:25:22,439 --> 01:25:24,359
Speaker 1: Do you think Prince Harry got a body.

1770
01:25:25,279 --> 01:25:28,600
Speaker 2: So he probably called in artillery strikes? Yeah, but I

1771
01:25:28,640 --> 01:25:33,079
don't think that counts first. Yeah, Like I don't count

1772
01:25:33,159 --> 01:25:36,119
everybody that Truman's unit got as his because he was

1773
01:25:36,239 --> 01:25:37,960
ordering it. It's got to be the ones where he

1774
01:25:38,039 --> 01:25:40,399
was yanking and from all from all accounts, he was

1775
01:25:40,479 --> 01:25:42,720
often pulled, like not often, but he would pull the

1776
01:25:42,720 --> 01:25:45,600
trigger on the canon from time time. Okay, I think if.

1777
01:25:47,119 --> 01:25:49,600
Speaker 3: I think, if anything, Prince Harry's body count is like

1778
01:25:50,039 --> 01:25:52,640
maybe like a drunken antic, you know, or like I

1779
01:25:52,640 --> 01:25:55,760
feel like it's more of like a heard of Yeah,

1780
01:25:55,800 --> 01:25:57,960
like something like something that just kind of got swept

1781
01:25:58,000 --> 01:26:00,079
under the rug and somebody got a big check and

1782
01:26:00,239 --> 01:26:01,439
well like you know, his mom died.

1783
01:26:01,520 --> 01:26:05,960
Speaker 2: He gave someone too much cocaine, Yeah, like too good

1784
01:26:06,000 --> 01:26:06,600
of cocaine.

1785
01:26:06,600 --> 01:26:08,760
Speaker 3: Like if you're used to like sludge and you get

1786
01:26:08,760 --> 01:26:12,159
the pure you're trying to like, Yeah, it's like when

1787
01:26:12,239 --> 01:26:14,319
when old people smoke weed today, they're like this is

1788
01:26:14,319 --> 01:26:16,479
just different than it was. It's like, yeah, this isn't

1789
01:26:16,560 --> 01:26:19,520
like this wasn't like grown in someone's like closet and

1790
01:26:19,560 --> 01:26:20,880
this is like Dick.

1791
01:26:20,760 --> 01:26:23,840
Speaker 2: Cheney tried to get a body. Oh good, there's several

1792
01:26:23,960 --> 01:26:25,840
vice presidents of bodies that didn't get into it. But

1793
01:26:26,680 --> 01:26:27,119
and then.

1794
01:26:27,920 --> 01:26:28,880
Speaker 1: Certainly has bodies.

1795
01:26:28,880 --> 01:26:30,680
Speaker 2: But yeah, as far as Congressman go.

1796
01:26:30,920 --> 01:26:32,439
Speaker 1: When he went hunted and he tried to kill his

1797
01:26:32,479 --> 01:26:37,800
friend Nancy Pelosi, Hillary Clinton bodies.

1798
01:26:37,680 --> 01:26:40,199
Speaker 2: So many bodies, so many not not her own hands

1799
01:26:40,840 --> 01:26:43,520
can't count. I know she she's got a good wet work. Guy. Yeah,

1800
01:26:43,520 --> 01:26:45,399
I'm saying, but it's got your own hands. You got

1801
01:26:45,439 --> 01:26:45,960
to snatch that.

1802
01:26:46,119 --> 01:26:47,760
Speaker 3: I've never heard of wet work yourself.

1803
01:26:48,319 --> 01:26:49,079
Speaker 1: You're not the biz.

1804
01:26:50,279 --> 01:26:52,920
Speaker 2: You're not in the biz. What you guys learned today?

1805
01:26:54,680 --> 01:26:57,680
Speaker 1: I learned that, uh, Tailor and Tyler are different people.

1806
01:26:58,760 --> 01:27:00,319
Now I knew that, but I just always I think

1807
01:27:00,359 --> 01:27:02,720
it just barely though they served right by each other.

1808
01:27:02,600 --> 01:27:04,439
Speaker 2: I get them mixed up all the time. So fair.

1809
01:27:04,600 --> 01:27:06,560
Speaker 1: I thought Tyler was in the Mexican American War.

1810
01:27:06,600 --> 01:27:08,960
Speaker 2: It was Taylor Tyler. I think it was in the

1811
01:27:08,960 --> 01:27:10,960
War of eighteen War. I said that.

1812
01:27:11,439 --> 01:27:13,399
Speaker 3: I learned that George Washington was six to four.

1813
01:27:13,520 --> 01:27:15,319
Speaker 2: Who know, I think that's probably why he.

1814
01:27:15,279 --> 01:27:18,720
Speaker 1: Was elected being six four, Madison being five four.

1815
01:27:19,119 --> 01:27:21,600
Speaker 3: I think Madison being five four, that's hilarious.

1816
01:27:22,119 --> 01:27:24,479
Speaker 2: That's a lot. That was the guy. To be fair,

1817
01:27:25,119 --> 01:27:31,199
our shortest president white House burned down, reached the stove

1818
01:27:31,239 --> 01:27:35,680
to turn it off. Fucking Canadians. They didn't respect his height.

1819
01:27:36,359 --> 01:27:40,720
Who's today's hitler? Is it Jackson?

1820
01:27:42,000 --> 01:27:43,000
Speaker 3: It's always Jackson.

1821
01:27:43,079 --> 01:27:43,479
Speaker 2: I don't know.

1822
01:27:43,680 --> 01:27:45,600
Speaker 1: Jackson rightfully killed the guy.

1823
01:27:45,640 --> 01:27:46,560
Speaker 2: And you know in.

1824
01:27:46,520 --> 01:27:49,680
Speaker 3: The Jackson's Crew, it's like Jackson's.

1825
01:27:49,560 --> 01:27:51,840
Speaker 2: Challenge to a duel that he then tried to cheat

1826
01:27:51,880 --> 01:27:54,239
at and didn't succeed.

1827
01:27:54,319 --> 01:27:56,800
Speaker 3: Won the duel, but didn't pretty ungentlemanly to cheat at

1828
01:27:56,800 --> 01:27:57,279
a duel.

1829
01:27:57,520 --> 01:28:01,239
Speaker 1: He didn't really cheat, you know, grease the he let the.

1830
01:28:01,159 --> 01:28:03,960
Speaker 2: Guy hit him. So here's it's cheating in the way

1831
01:28:04,039 --> 01:28:05,560
like you know back in the day when you play

1832
01:28:05,560 --> 01:28:08,640
beer pung and someone would be a total twat and

1833
01:28:08,720 --> 01:28:10,960
like put their hand over the cups and they he

1834
01:28:11,039 --> 01:28:13,000
knows me, always me, dude, It's not.

1835
01:28:13,079 --> 01:28:14,800
Speaker 1: It was like it's like power slap and you lot,

1836
01:28:15,000 --> 01:28:17,279
you let the first the person go before you you

1837
01:28:17,359 --> 01:28:19,800
eat it and then you just wind up and.

1838
01:28:19,840 --> 01:28:23,079
Speaker 2: I mean, he fucking ate it. Yeah, go full blast.

1839
01:28:23,439 --> 01:28:25,119
Speaker 3: You think he got like lead poisoning from it like,

1840
01:28:25,159 --> 01:28:29,800
did he have an last It was perfectly that's crazy.

1841
01:28:29,800 --> 01:28:35,399
Speaker 2: Good for him, impressive bastards live forever. Yeah, yeah, uh

1842
01:28:35,640 --> 01:28:37,920
is your hitler Jackson as well? I think so. I

1843
01:28:37,920 --> 01:28:39,840
don't know. I mean, I don't I don't think there's true.

1844
01:28:40,359 --> 01:28:43,479
Speaker 1: It's not even Jackson, it's literally George Washington. For he

1845
01:28:43,560 --> 01:28:45,560
killed a guy that was trying to surrender.

1846
01:28:46,239 --> 01:28:48,359
Speaker 2: His troops, did sir? I think he got I don't

1847
01:28:48,359 --> 01:28:50,199
know if he killed back. I do think that was

1848
01:28:50,239 --> 01:28:51,920
the least he got war crimed bodies.

1849
01:28:52,199 --> 01:28:55,439
Speaker 3: Yeah, I think that's justified upright. Yeah, Like that's the

1850
01:28:55,479 --> 01:28:56,920
most crooked killing, right.

1851
01:28:56,960 --> 01:28:59,439
Speaker 1: He's supposed to be this upstanding founding father.

1852
01:28:59,600 --> 01:29:01,640
Speaker 3: Yeah, and he's just fucking axing.

1853
01:29:01,720 --> 01:29:03,520
Speaker 2: And he probably took a scalp.

1854
01:29:04,640 --> 01:29:08,479
Speaker 1: Maybe you think this was erely Washington.

1855
01:29:08,520 --> 01:29:12,520
Speaker 3: Was before the different man, before he calmed down. He

1856
01:29:12,640 --> 01:29:14,760
was saved for his house broken.

1857
01:29:14,800 --> 01:29:15,920
Speaker 1: He was a fucking wild man.

1858
01:29:17,039 --> 01:29:20,640
Speaker 2: I mean, he was fiery, red hair at the I'm

1859
01:29:20,680 --> 01:29:25,479
just imagining Conan with wood teeth. It's probably accurate. When

1860
01:29:25,479 --> 01:29:28,279
did she By the way, you know that George Washington

1861
01:29:28,359 --> 01:29:29,640
was Martha Washington's second.

1862
01:29:29,439 --> 01:29:32,760
Speaker 3: Husband, because didn't you have a kid already? Did he

1863
01:29:32,800 --> 01:29:33,560
have step kids.

1864
01:29:33,680 --> 01:29:37,560
Speaker 2: I don't know. So they were married in seventeen fifty nine.

1865
01:29:37,359 --> 01:29:39,039
Speaker 3: But didn't she have kids before?

1866
01:29:39,319 --> 01:29:43,159
Speaker 2: Probably? Honestly, he was unmarried and he was not married

1867
01:29:43,159 --> 01:29:44,199
at times. Single man.

1868
01:29:44,760 --> 01:29:46,840
Speaker 3: That that is the actions of a sing that's those

1869
01:29:46,840 --> 01:29:48,399
are the actions of a man without a woman in

1870
01:29:48,439 --> 01:29:48,760
his bed.

1871
01:29:49,880 --> 01:29:52,119
Speaker 2: But also, do you want to be a second husband.

1872
01:29:52,680 --> 01:29:54,359
Speaker 3: I mean, I don't want to be anyone's husband.

1873
01:29:54,600 --> 01:29:57,800
Speaker 2: She was pretty rich and her husband died. I think

1874
01:29:57,840 --> 01:30:00,760
you just got to get one out the system, you what,

1875
01:30:00,880 --> 01:30:03,159
you gotta get one out of the system, like he

1876
01:30:03,159 --> 01:30:07,199
should have married someone else, have her and then she

1877
01:30:07,239 --> 01:30:08,079
dies in childbirth?

1878
01:30:08,239 --> 01:30:11,319
Speaker 3: Yeah okay, yeah, but then the worst case scenario is

1879
01:30:11,359 --> 01:30:13,439
you're stuck with the living child and the mom died.

1880
01:30:14,640 --> 01:30:15,520
Then you have to take care of it.

1881
01:30:15,600 --> 01:30:18,479
Speaker 2: But then you start dating again. Find some hot sixteen

1882
01:30:18,520 --> 01:30:19,880
year old in town and just like.

1883
01:30:21,359 --> 01:30:22,359
Speaker 3: Start black dating.

1884
01:30:22,760 --> 01:30:26,880
Speaker 2: Yeah, you have her kid place. Well, first there's forty

1885
01:30:26,960 --> 01:30:30,520
slave wet nurses on the plantation. That's George. Has that

1886
01:30:30,680 --> 01:30:31,279
taken care of?

1887
01:30:31,399 --> 01:30:31,640
Speaker 3: Yeah?

1888
01:30:31,720 --> 01:30:35,079
Speaker 2: Sure? But yeah, then you just find some cute high

1889
01:30:35,119 --> 01:30:36,880
schooler in town and that's your new wife, and then

1890
01:30:36,920 --> 01:30:39,359
you marry her. Yeah, and then you go war crimes

1891
01:30:39,439 --> 01:30:40,159
some French guys.

1892
01:30:40,600 --> 01:30:41,880
Speaker 3: No, but I don't think he would have done war

1893
01:30:41,920 --> 01:30:43,800
crimes if he was married. I think war crimes are

1894
01:30:43,840 --> 01:30:46,760
for young man. War crimes are a bachelor's game.

1895
01:30:46,880 --> 01:30:51,479
Speaker 2: Yeah, explains many bachelor parties have been. I feel like

1896
01:30:51,560 --> 01:30:53,800
Napolean committed a lot of war crimes in the name

1897
01:30:53,840 --> 01:30:56,279
of his wife, but how many did he do? Buy?

1898
01:30:56,479 --> 01:30:59,760
Speaker 3: I love his dirty letters to his wife. I love

1899
01:30:59,800 --> 01:31:02,239
the he was like a sexter Napoleon.

1900
01:31:02,359 --> 01:31:05,840
Speaker 2: Oh you should, uh did we do James Joyce's.

1901
01:31:05,600 --> 01:31:08,479
Speaker 1: He was kind of a sub right, like his wife

1902
01:31:08,560 --> 01:31:09,319
dominated him.

1903
01:31:09,399 --> 01:31:11,199
Speaker 3: Yeah, and he would like talk about how he wanted

1904
01:31:11,239 --> 01:31:17,560
to Yeah, domb on the field, sub in the bedroom. Yeah.

1905
01:31:18,000 --> 01:31:21,520
Nothing beats Prince Charles's letters to Camilla where he's like,

1906
01:31:21,520 --> 01:31:23,359
I wish I was your tampax so I could live

1907
01:31:23,359 --> 01:31:24,000
inside you.

1908
01:31:26,840 --> 01:31:28,439
Speaker 2: It's beautiful royal.

1909
01:31:28,960 --> 01:31:31,920
Speaker 3: That's Today's Yeah, today and every.

1910
01:31:31,800 --> 01:31:36,359
Speaker 2: Day you're Todays Taylor. Now that's you know that, it's.

1911
01:31:36,239 --> 01:31:41,399
Speaker 3: A gruesome, disgusting that was like written down, yes, and.

1912
01:31:41,359 --> 01:31:42,920
Speaker 2: You know he like reread it and he was like, oh,

1913
01:31:42,920 --> 01:31:46,119
that's good. That's the one that made the edit all right.

1914
01:31:46,159 --> 01:31:52,119
Well for Dan Regester and Gabby Monte. Thanks for joining us.

1915
01:31:54,199 --> 01:31:56,600
Speaker 3: Up all me on everything at gab Monty unless you

1916
01:31:56,640 --> 01:31:58,640
have something mean to say and then don't perfect.

1917
01:31:59,399 --> 01:32:03,000
Speaker 1: Also leave comments on the YouTube. Subscribe to our YouTube channel.

1918
01:32:03,319 --> 01:32:06,199
Software History just put in the search bar you'll find it.

1919
01:32:07,239 --> 01:32:10,439
Rate and review on Apple and Spotify five stars. On

1920
01:32:10,479 --> 01:32:13,680
Spotify Apple five stars, leave a review again and sow

1921
01:32:13,680 --> 01:32:16,600
we move up the charts. And of course Patreon dot

1922
01:32:16,680 --> 01:32:19,640
com slash software History, where you get two additional episodes

1923
01:32:19,640 --> 01:32:23,079
every week, and we already have two years of evergreen content.

1924
01:32:23,760 --> 01:32:27,039
So you can literally sign up right now and you'll

1925
01:32:27,079 --> 01:32:28,279
be good for like the rest of the year.

1926
01:32:28,359 --> 01:32:30,960
Speaker 2: It's a lot, I.

1927
01:32:30,960 --> 01:32:33,800
Speaker 3: Mean, any merch coming.

1928
01:32:33,600 --> 01:32:36,239
Speaker 1: In merch software here dot com. But people are raving

1929
01:32:36,279 --> 01:32:38,319
right now about Skippy the Roach.

1930
01:32:39,199 --> 01:32:43,399
Speaker 2: Yeah. I'm starting to do audio sketches spare pet rooms.

1931
01:32:43,560 --> 01:32:44,000
Speaker 3: I love it.

1932
01:32:44,640 --> 01:32:47,079
Speaker 2: People better than spare bedroom?

1933
01:32:47,199 --> 01:32:49,119
Speaker 3: What better sound quality than spare bedroom.

1934
01:32:49,199 --> 01:32:51,920
Speaker 2: Well, it's not recorded in a spare bedroom anymore. Yeah,

1935
01:32:51,920 --> 01:32:54,520
We're not recorded on like a phone. Yeah, uh no,

1936
01:32:54,640 --> 01:32:56,720
it's yeah. So I'm trying to do a sketch every

1937
01:32:56,720 --> 01:33:00,920
other week. Try to stand this schedule. I I've been

1938
01:33:00,960 --> 01:33:03,159
off and already because last week's production schedule for the

1939
01:33:03,159 --> 01:33:06,119
studio was we already got our next one? What Teddy

1940
01:33:06,199 --> 01:33:07,720
Roosevelt fights around the world.

1941
01:33:10,079 --> 01:33:14,000
Speaker 3: I just want more rob as like a prostitute. I

1942
01:33:14,039 --> 01:33:15,439
love Helen Slagerman.

1943
01:33:15,560 --> 01:33:18,800
Speaker 2: Helen Slagraman is coming back that there's one diary of

1944
01:33:18,800 --> 01:33:20,960
Helen Slagerman on there so far. There's given me another

1945
01:33:20,960 --> 01:33:22,119
one coming in the next couple of weeks.

1946
01:33:22,399 --> 01:33:22,680
Speaker 3: Helen.

1947
01:33:22,920 --> 01:33:25,640
Speaker 2: Uh, yeah, I've got a sketch idea I'm writing right

1948
01:33:25,680 --> 01:33:27,199
now for the next one. And then what do you

1949
01:33:27,199 --> 01:33:29,000
want after Helen? After that?

1950
01:33:29,039 --> 01:33:31,479
Speaker 3: You gotta space out your Helen's because it's hell on

1951
01:33:31,520 --> 01:33:32,119
your voice.

1952
01:33:32,239 --> 01:33:37,199
Speaker 2: It actually fucking is. He's never the same.

1953
01:33:37,279 --> 01:33:40,720
Speaker 3: It's my favorite, a little piece of every time he does.

1954
01:33:40,560 --> 01:33:43,920
Speaker 2: The voice Helen Slagerman.

1955
01:33:44,000 --> 01:33:46,760
Speaker 1: You can find him as Rob Fox three on Socials.

1956
01:33:47,039 --> 01:33:49,840
I'm damn Rejester R E g E s T E R.

1957
01:33:52,000 --> 01:33:54,520
Speaker 2: I can't do right now. It's not ready, it's not ready.

1958
01:33:54,520 --> 01:33:57,399
And yeah, Rob take us out, uh for Damn Jester

1959
01:33:57,479 --> 01:33:59,000
and Gabby want to me or I'm Rob Fox. You

1960
01:33:59,119 --> 01:33:59,800
just got Saucer