Speaker 1: While we're having this conversation, there is a blender with
Speaker 1: a horrifying brown liquid in it that I was kind
Speaker 1: of like, are we just gonna have this in the
Speaker 1: shot and we're gonna pretend like this is disgusting? What
Speaker 1: sewage backup is in that vitamins? Get it off the screen. Also,
Speaker 1: Asha is eating a sandwich like a fucking barbarian.
Speaker 2: She needs to get her calories in. She's working her ass.
Speaker 3: Hey, it's bad, it's bad.
Speaker 4: It's bad TV. What do you think like doing? Like,
Speaker 4: what was that show?
Speaker 1: But bab bab Andy Griffith dud Okay, well, clearly I've
Speaker 1: consumed too much marijuana. I don't know how we're talking
Speaker 1: about the It's it, Andy Griffith.
Speaker 2: Welcome to the And.
Speaker 1: What did they do just like boy Scout kind of lessons?
Speaker 1: Did they like fight?
Speaker 2: It's a very sweet show.
Speaker 4: Okay.
Speaker 2: I used to watch it reruns obviously when I get
Speaker 2: home from school when I was a little boy.
Speaker 1: And did they tackle race or anything like that?
Speaker 4: Just stepping rocks for half of.
Speaker 2: That was I think that was Archie Bunker.
Speaker 1: All Right, we'll get in the comments. Let us know
Speaker 1: if you're a big fan of that.
Speaker 4: Show or and really.
Speaker 1: Let us know anything you want. We want to hear
Speaker 1: from you, guys. Kalin's here as well. The whole gang
Speaker 1: is here, and we should mention sexy photo shoots of Pat.
Speaker 2: Head on over to Dylan got me what do you
Speaker 2: call those boxer briefs? Boxer? There is a sexy photoshoot
Speaker 2: over on Patreon of me trying them on.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I mean.
Speaker 4: Form fitting.
Speaker 2: My only issue is you got me large a very
Speaker 2: small frame.
Speaker 1: Again, it's a bridge to the medium you've got. You've
Speaker 1: lived boxers your entire life. We can't go straight to medium.
Speaker 1: It's gonna be too taut. Your little Irish wiener is
Speaker 1: gonna be way too strangled in a medium. But you
Speaker 1: can grow into those. But if you want to see
Speaker 1: Pat's Q, little ass, his hairless body, his rock and
Speaker 1: dead dude got a Patreon on Slash. Another podcast network
Speaker 1: also will be covering starting this week. I think, uh,
Speaker 1: this is where we follow four house following them.
Speaker 2: That are raising children, bringing kids to basketball.
Speaker 1: Even soccer, possibly even.
Speaker 2: Then at night they go down into their dirty, dirty
Speaker 2: basements and then walk into a room with a bed
Speaker 2: with all those likes that make you look hotter on camera. Yeah,
Speaker 2: they get naked and do stuff.
Speaker 1: Yeah, like when the light is like that, it kind
Speaker 1: of washes out the impurity. Is that for some reason,
Speaker 1: our society has deemed you know, discuss disgusting, right, and
Speaker 1: we're not about that.
Speaker 4: You know, we're about natural bitches.
Speaker 2: You know when you watch our YouTube, everything's there, all
Speaker 2: my flaws.
Speaker 1: Fuck yeah, this asshole is not good enough at lighting
Speaker 1: to get rid of our imperfection.
Speaker 2: I look at it for about thirty and a half
Speaker 2: seconds and I said, that fucker made me look like
Speaker 2: I have a double chin again, Dylan, can we fire Kalin?
Speaker 1: So we're covering that. There's also a naked photo shoot,
Speaker 1: and I guess you know, we've been talking about this
Speaker 1: tier of late, but there is still the flight of
Speaker 1: the Phoenix tier.
Speaker 4: Now, we're not going.
Speaker 1: To bring the price down any further, okay, because we're
Speaker 1: already doing a kind of it's dignity less thing where
Speaker 1: for thirty five thousand dollars, Patt and I will fuck
Speaker 1: each other on camera. Now we've brought that down from fifty.
Speaker 4: Two I think was its ceiling.
Speaker 1: Think about what we go through to know that no
Speaker 1: one's biting at that. Okay, So We're not driving the
Speaker 1: price down any now.
Speaker 2: I have morals and ethics. Yeah, I'm not dropping a
Speaker 2: dime less than thirty five thousand could pay each other camera. Right,
Speaker 2: My mother did not raise a four right, right, right.
Speaker 1: So listen, we have a below deck episode breakdown tonight, Kaylin,
Speaker 1: are you doing okay? I'm doing very well.
Speaker 4: Thank you.
Speaker 2: By the way, jump in our patron so we can
Speaker 2: pay for a camera to go on, Kaylan. People want
Speaker 2: to see what he looks like. And if you if
Speaker 2: I don't know, if thirty of you guys jump in,
Speaker 2: we can pay for another camera.
Speaker 1: Yeah. If a bunch of more people go to Patreon,
Speaker 1: we'll get a camera. And then my favorite thing about
Speaker 1: this camera and Kaylen, you would have to be okay
Speaker 1: with this, but pat controls the angle, what's it? Wherever
Speaker 1: he wants as as your come up and from making
Speaker 1: him ConTroll. All right, let's get into blow deck. Sure
Speaker 1: fun episode tonight. There was a pirate chip.
Speaker 4: How often?
Speaker 1: How often do you have pirate chips?
Speaker 4: So I loved it a hundred pots.
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, very brief. I'll expound a little bit, okay,
Speaker 1: but I'll say I said I'll expound.
Speaker 2: Now.
Speaker 1: Yeah, Okay, okay, Cooper, mm hmm. The revelation we we
Speaker 1: half known was coming. I think we were duped a
Speaker 1: little bit. We said, oh, he does seem like a
Speaker 1: good Southern boy, but we did say caveat but ellipses
Speaker 1: he is a male c rat. So I don't care
Speaker 1: if you were an instructor of catillion. I don't care
Speaker 1: if you are a duke of whatever. Fuck ca and
Speaker 1: bumf ups. Just South Carolinian ship. You're fucking ship is from.
Speaker 1: If you're a male c rat, you are a pig.
Speaker 1: And that's just the algebra. I'm sorry, them's bees the rules.
Speaker 1: Children go ahead.
Speaker 2: O jumping off point from Okay, So also I feel
Speaker 2: bad for kat.
Speaker 4: What do you think about my new new thing?
Speaker 2: You're drinking vessel?
Speaker 4: Drink nice.
Speaker 2: It's nice. It's proof that we have things too good.
Speaker 2: I mean that that is a beautiful drinking vessel. What
Speaker 2: do we call those things again?
Speaker 1: Uh?
Speaker 4: This is a canteen.
Speaker 2: No, it's called something else, thermos. There's a new fancier
Speaker 2: name for it, Stanley.
Speaker 1: Yes, No, that's a brand.
Speaker 2: That's a brand like Klean EGX.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's a brand that you are in such bougie
Speaker 1: circles that you've allowed that. Okay, look up that term
Speaker 1: for us. What is it? What happens when a brand
Speaker 1: takes over the name of the product.
Speaker 4: What is that called?
Speaker 2: Like toilet paper, no h.
Speaker 1: Tic tax, no Q tip, tinfoil, no cleanex is one.
Speaker 1: It's called a tissue. Let me even call it. Yeah,
Speaker 1: that's what I was saying. Just I mean, we've lost
Speaker 1: everybody already, so it's fine. It's called a trademark, generous,
Speaker 1: generous side trademark.
Speaker 3: God damn it, let's move on.
Speaker 2: I apology picked up that goddamn drink.
Speaker 1: That's totally faults Cooper.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I feel bad for Cat, But Kat, you do
Speaker 2: not know this man. And I always say, you don't
Speaker 2: even know someone that you're dating. You can't even scratch
Speaker 2: the surface of who this human being is until you've
Speaker 2: dated them a lot, like seeing them a lot, not
Speaker 2: casually dated them for three months.
Speaker 1: I always say you have to see somebody's butthole before
Speaker 1: you know who they actually.
Speaker 2: I think that's a pretty good uh scale.
Speaker 1: But also road.
Speaker 2: Trip known them for three months and men, some of
Speaker 2: their family members, no, no, some of their friends. They
Speaker 2: have to have friends if they don't have friends. That's
Speaker 2: fucking we're.
Speaker 4: Okay, so let's do the checklist. Three months road trip
Speaker 4: butthole friends.
Speaker 2: Yes.
Speaker 4: Then you know.
Speaker 1: What's startling is there are certain character types, certain archetypes
Speaker 1: that I don't need to know anything about you. I
Speaker 1: know you, right. So Kat doesn't know Cooper even though
Speaker 1: she's met him. We know Cooper because we're dudes, and
Speaker 1: also we've been watching this show for a while.
Speaker 2: Very that's true. But I would say sometimes it takes
Speaker 2: thirty years Asa Hauserman, do you know that name?
Speaker 4: Absolutely not?
Speaker 2: Okay, she was married to a dude for thirty years
Speaker 2: that just recently was arrested child for hunting prostitutes for
Speaker 2: sport and killing them. Can you believe that you were
Speaker 2: sleeping next to this man.
Speaker 4: For thirty years?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's pretty rare.
Speaker 1: Though.
Speaker 2: I think he's called the Bilko Beach Killer or something.
Speaker 1: They'll make.
Speaker 2: They'll they'll be like documentaries about him for like the
Speaker 2: next twenty years.
Speaker 1: Yeah, but she didn't know that man.
Speaker 4: And honestly, dude, find something harder to hunt, so hard
Speaker 4: to run away in those heels. That's a great point,
Speaker 4: is it? My nots Yep?
Speaker 2: Okay, Kermit I want to I want to say, I
Speaker 2: give it seven seven, it's not I love this episode.
Speaker 2: Cooper whispering to Kat in that little whatever motor area
Speaker 2: where he closed the door.
Speaker 4: Oh yeah, Why are you two having this conversation in
Speaker 4: a skiff?
Speaker 1: Why?
Speaker 4: Why does this need to happen?
Speaker 2: Okay, ski, that is the million dollar question, because he
Speaker 2: he told her that he still wants to pursue things
Speaker 2: with her. Very confusing to me because he seems like
Speaker 2: he wants to be a fuck boy, and it made
Speaker 2: me think, do you have a girlfriend back home? And
Speaker 2: that's why you're you wanted to because he thought that
Speaker 2: this conversation was he did everything he could to have
Speaker 2: it not caught on camera and not be caught on audio.
Speaker 2: And then he said the number one thing he wanted
Speaker 2: to do is he wants it to make it look
Speaker 2: like they're not dating and just catch kisses while no
Speaker 2: one's looking. And she's all about it, and I feel
Speaker 2: bad for her.
Speaker 3: I know, Heykay, can you look? Is it a skiff
Speaker 3: for a skiff? I think it's a skiff?
Speaker 1: You know what I'm talking about?
Speaker 2: This might be one of those wormholes that's gonna come
Speaker 2: up with nothing.
Speaker 1: Okay, sorry to say you're right.
Speaker 2: Let me let me, let me give my my thoughts here. Yeah, Kermit,
Speaker 2: I give her a lot of shit, but based on
Speaker 2: this episode and watching her for a very long time,
Speaker 2: I'm gonna give her due here. Her DNA needs to
Speaker 2: be coded. We need to use her DNA to be
Speaker 2: used to create a new race of amazing human beings.
Speaker 2: Great work ethic. She's just a nice person.
Speaker 1: But the nice coupled with the work ethic is crazy. Like,
Speaker 1: she's such an amazing human being. She's so sweet, she
Speaker 1: handles conflict very very well, and she works her ass off.
Speaker 1: And when she's working, it's not a bubbly like, she's
Speaker 1: just working her klein.
Speaker 2: I will say this obviously though a few tweaks to
Speaker 2: the DNA.
Speaker 4: Less Scott, h.
Speaker 1: That's really just it.
Speaker 4: She's so gorgeous.
Speaker 1: Yeah, what are you tweaking?
Speaker 4: I mean, this is a yeah, I agree.
Speaker 1: I don't call her.
Speaker 2: I don't call her Kermit because she goes down on
Speaker 2: a pig. Okay, cold voice is fucking annoying, Okay, but
Speaker 2: everything else is perfect code the DNA.
Speaker 4: Okay, Jesus Christ Carmen, I love you.
Speaker 1: He really he does go down at a pig.
Speaker 2: Huh, he's been dating her for like sixty years? Can
Speaker 2: you imagine that?
Speaker 4: Are they married or do they just just dating?
Speaker 1: Okay, all right, so can we get into the episode.
Speaker 4: I am not asking Calen what he thinks?
Speaker 1: What do you say?
Speaker 4: Corporate genocide?
Speaker 1: What the fuck did you even say? What?
Speaker 2: Is it a skipper?
Speaker 4: A skiff?
Speaker 1: Skiff?
Speaker 4: It's a skiff? What does a stand for?
Speaker 1: I didn't. Okay, that's fine, that's fine, and keep an
Speaker 1: eye on him. All right. So last week left off,
Speaker 1: Nathan had a boo boo and we did get a diagnose.
Speaker 4: He it's a bruised disc. I've had a couple of those.
Speaker 1: Huh, two thousand and nine, all my favorite kigs of
Speaker 1: Leon songs. You know what I'm talking about? Okay, Caylen,
Speaker 1: keep an.
Speaker 4: Eye on me.
Speaker 1: So the guests have hurt ass or abs or ass,
Speaker 1: and we get to making an adjustment. So Nathan is
Speaker 1: going to be off the boat, so we're going to
Speaker 1: be docking with even less people. Now, a couple things
Speaker 1: about this. While we're having this conversation, there is a
Speaker 1: blender with a horrifying brown liquid in it that I
Speaker 1: was kind of like, are we just going to have
Speaker 1: this in the shot and we're gonna pretend like this
Speaker 1: is disgusting. What sewage backup is in that VitaminX? Get
Speaker 1: it off the screen. Also, Asia is eating a sandwich
Speaker 1: like a fucking barbarian.
Speaker 2: She needs to get her calories. She's working her ass. No,
Speaker 2: I want to point out that Sandy, when she's down
Speaker 2: to a very limited crew here and needs to well
Speaker 2: we'll find out, is gonna enlist essentially the entire everybody.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, we're turning it into a rowboat.
Speaker 2: This is a first I love first Yeah, especially on
Speaker 2: these boats. We uh, the first time someone served Nacho's
Speaker 2: as a entree to a Vegas themed dinner? First? Huge
Speaker 2: on this, first time someone clogged a shower drain with
Speaker 2: human feces?
Speaker 1: Yeah? What about that guy that was like the called
Speaker 1: but I love women and his leg almost got ripped
Speaker 1: in half. That that was the first.
Speaker 2: Wow. Yeah, they're always interesting. Now there's something interesting that
Speaker 2: happens where Sandy goes down to explain to the decies
Speaker 2: who are all down in the galley.
Speaker 4: By the way. Yeah, pile of fucking shit water.
Speaker 2: So Coop's down there, Joe's down there, Current's eating like
Speaker 2: a barbarian and Sandy says, hey, hey, hey, you're all
Speaker 2: down here, and so are you, Captain Sandy, who's making
Speaker 2: sure this boat doesn't slam into something?
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, yeah, Well the boat I feel like, might
Speaker 1: have been anchored and Sandy doesn't really do anything but
Speaker 1: dock the boat.
Speaker 2: Well, if we're.
Speaker 1: Gonna which is a big deal, I'm Sandy is a
Speaker 1: badass and she is really coming into her own. It's
Speaker 1: taken fifty years of being on this show, but she
Speaker 1: is really stepping into it. I mean the pirate stuff,
Speaker 1: it's just having so fun.
Speaker 2: I love it. Yeah, but I'd argue, if we're to
Speaker 2: buy into the concept that Sandy is commanding this vessel,
Speaker 2: why would you why would you leave top side?
Speaker 1: Well, it's like that Tessa you were talking about, have
Speaker 1: a couple of pop Oh.
Speaker 2: No, Dylan's referring to the new Tesla's coming out. You
Speaker 2: can be completely wasted and fall asleep in the back
Speaker 2: seat and just let it drive you on.
Speaker 1: Now, Sandy's sanity is sober, and she's on a journey
Speaker 1: fighting a way of those teaments, so that wouldn't be her.
Speaker 1: But you know, kind of similar hands off approach. We
Speaker 1: have to get ready for dinner. Tonight is going to
Speaker 1: be Old Hollywood, and first up, we've got bread and oysters.
Speaker 1: And Grimace has quite a bit of an issue with
Speaker 1: the way this meal is plated.
Speaker 2: That's right, Yeah, yeah, I guess there's no plate for
Speaker 2: the caviar.
Speaker 1: There should be separate dishes. If we're going to be
Speaker 1: doing a white tablecloth.
Speaker 4: Kind of.
Speaker 1: Gross amuse boush kind of thing to kick off, the
Speaker 1: meal should be extremely ornate and there should be a
Speaker 1: bread dish and an oyster dish and a caviar dish.
Speaker 2: I will argue with her that some of these plates
Speaker 2: on this first plate they they did it looks like
Speaker 2: a buffet plate.
Speaker 1: Yeah, there were four these. Oh no, no, no, it was
Speaker 1: a just a gratuitous mistake to say, welcome to your
Speaker 1: expensive vacation. The first couple of courses are going to
Speaker 1: be all laid bare on this child's tea party plate
Speaker 1: before you. You're going to have your oyster on top
Speaker 1: of it. You're going to have your forks, your bread,
Speaker 1: everything is going to be on top of this little
Speaker 1: tiny thing in front of you. But Grimace is.
Speaker 2: Even have you guys ever been to a farm where
Speaker 2: we feed pigs, you know where we just dump everything
Speaker 2: on a single place and then you just eat it
Speaker 2: in front of you.
Speaker 1: It's chicken broth, it's raw liver, and it's all gonna
Speaker 1: be like that.
Speaker 4: But Grimace is evil.
Speaker 1: So while Kayley, I'm a big fan of Kaylee. I
Speaker 1: think Kaylee just handled Gens Night Mirrorish drama very very well.
Speaker 1: And I think she handles that fucking caterpillar face very
Speaker 1: well too. We'll get to him later. Hey, I'm gonna
Speaker 1: go hit on those other girls. I'm just trying to
Speaker 1: test you, Okay, go fucking talk to them.
Speaker 2: I love how Joe gets some juice and he starts
Speaker 2: reverting back to fuck boy, like we only we only
Speaker 2: had nice Joe for a minute.
Speaker 1: Imagine that being deemed into embOS and turns you into
Speaker 1: a new human being. That's like if you got a
Speaker 1: Blockbuster gift card, it would turn you into a new
Speaker 1: human being.
Speaker 2: Wow, I'm going to fuck everybody.
Speaker 3: Right, but the business doesn't exist anymore?
Speaker 1: What Okay?
Speaker 4: So Grimace is mortified.
Speaker 1: The bread and caviar and the same thing, and the
Speaker 1: first course comes up next. It is a lobster salad
Speaker 1: cooked and gutter.
Speaker 4: Garlick butter line.
Speaker 1: There are ribbons of carrot haphazardly placed around the dish.
Speaker 1: It looks like a mass of something that's been removed
Speaker 1: from a human body. It was a disgusting plating and overall,
Speaker 1: I think this was the worst dinner of the season.
Speaker 1: I'd give it seven pots seven. Yeah.
Speaker 3: Joy needs to.
Speaker 1: Get off the phone sending text messages to Kronk okay,
Speaker 1: because this was just not okay. Yeah, okay, and Joy
Speaker 1: I don't want to hold her to do.
Speaker 4: I bit my tongue, all right.
Speaker 2: I'll fill in some space here. Maybe she was playing
Speaker 2: to the crowd. She alluded to that last episode where
Speaker 2: she basically like, she didn't say it this way, but
Speaker 2: she's like, I think these these people are white trash,
Speaker 2: So I'm just gonna give.
Speaker 1: Them I don't know them like pigs.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, and they'll like it, you know, pigs do
Speaker 2: like it turns out they'll eat anything.
Speaker 1: Yeah, fucking uh. As we know from the one with
Speaker 1: the Brad Pitt in it.
Speaker 2: Snatch, they'll eat humans. I don't know if that's true.
Speaker 4: No, it's true, Kaylin, you don't even need to Pigs
Speaker 4: will eat humans.
Speaker 2: It's a version of a pig. They did that in
Speaker 2: Hannibal to the one.
Speaker 5: His own.
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, you remember Raleota Shantis. Rayleota was
Speaker 1: known for two things, three things, good fellas in Chantis,
Speaker 1: having an addiction problems, being in one of the greatest
Speaker 1: films of all time, and then being the guy in
Speaker 1: the CHANTI scircials now that is range.
Speaker 3: Is he dead?
Speaker 2: He's dead in his last film, I believe it was.
Speaker 2: Is it postumelessly posthumously Cocaine Bear?
Speaker 1: No, that's a good way to go out as far
Speaker 1: as I'm conn.
Speaker 2: I will say this because Kaylin's Dad Show is pretty popular.
Speaker 2: If he wasn't fucking dead, he definitely would have been
Speaker 2: on Kaylin's Dad Show.
Speaker 1: Can I tell you something, what what would you rather
Speaker 1: have your last movie to be Cocaine Bear or The Whale?
Speaker 1: Like imagine if Brendan Fraser, you know, rolled sevens and
Speaker 1: the last thing he was in was The Whale.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna go with Cocaine Bear because that could be
Speaker 2: a cult classic.
Speaker 1: Yeah for sure. All right, back to the show. Next morning,
Speaker 1: I give the Dinner seven pots. I give Bravo zero
Speaker 1: pots because we're doing this thing once again where we've
Speaker 1: got bread service with Caviaar and then we've got a
Speaker 1: mass of like a kind of triage emergency of lobster.
Speaker 1: There's more to this dinner. I saw zucchini all over
Speaker 1: the place in that in that galley. I saw a
Speaker 1: lot of commotion going on. Okay, ye, so come on,
Speaker 1: give us the goods.
Speaker 4: We'll get to the next morning.
Speaker 1: Next morning, Asia has continued to beast on night Mode,
Speaker 1: and we got some sea rat love. We've got Joe
Speaker 1: and Kaylee, and we've also got good Southern gentleman and cat.
Speaker 1: Now Joey. Joe's said that, uh recently said that all
Speaker 1: of the women that he's banged on this show. He
Speaker 1: was on Watch What Happens Live?
Speaker 4: Did you catch this?
Speaker 2: I didn't.
Speaker 1: Okay, they they kind of did this bubble encircling thing
Speaker 1: where they showed him all of the women that he's
Speaker 1: treated like absolute garbage on the show.
Speaker 2: Elena, the Balkan Biscuit, The Balkan Biscuit.
Speaker 4: We've got the girl.
Speaker 2: Who her husbands ran over by an elephant.
Speaker 4: Yeah underwater. There's someone else, yeah, Bri Bri.
Speaker 1: The other someone.
Speaker 4: Else there was there was the one that U.
Speaker 1: Six six He said, you still who are you still
Speaker 1: talking to here? And he said every single one except
Speaker 1: for the one in the top left, referring to Kaylee.
Speaker 1: Didn't even name her, just said the one on the
Speaker 1: top left. Oh so wow. In a shocking turn of events,
Speaker 1: a fucking usual Suspects type twist, turns out Joe and
Speaker 1: Kaylee do not work out.
Speaker 2: Shocking. You know who Joe's good buddies with, Max's X
Speaker 2: that girl that Max? Yeah, yeah, yeah, that would be interesting.
Speaker 1: Be careful, shees, you should not talk to Joe if
Speaker 1: you're a woman.
Speaker 2: All right, So the Coop lets us know that he's
Speaker 2: feeling a little pressure as to the relationship with Cat,
Speaker 2: and he says, effectively, they aren't on the same page.
Speaker 2: I think he says it like they're not on the
Speaker 2: same wave.
Speaker 1: Never, you've never talked to her about what wavelength she's on.
Speaker 1: That's right, You never talked to her about what page
Speaker 1: she's on. So you're just lying right now, right right.
Speaker 2: So here's Patty's advice. Don't have sex with her, Coop,
Speaker 2: don't do it. It's like breaking a knickknack and a
Speaker 2: gift shop. Whether or not you want it, you broke it.
Speaker 1: You're it's telling Cooper not to have sex with Kat.
Speaker 1: It is like telling those pigs not to eat that
Speaker 1: oat and chicken shit that they love eating. Now, I don't.
Speaker 2: Stick with the gift shop.
Speaker 1: I don't want to refer to her as that. I'm
Speaker 1: just saying she is lovely. I love cat. She is
Speaker 1: not oats with shit. She is a lovely, lovely young woman.
Speaker 2: No, she's a knickknack that don't break the nickknac because
Speaker 2: the knickknack is wonderful. And if it falls off the
Speaker 2: shelf because you were touching it too much and you
Speaker 2: break it, the store owner is going to say you
Speaker 2: own this motherfucker, and you do because you broke it.
Speaker 1: And you do not want to get into it with
Speaker 1: that store owner because it is a angry Chinese woman.
Speaker 4: And you are going to lose the life.
Speaker 2: And she says the phrase, I break, I cry, you break,
Speaker 2: you buy, and maybe someday you'll come around to a
Speaker 2: butterfly glass window ornament, but or maybe not.
Speaker 1: Yeah, right, right, So the point is careful, fuck or Coop,
Speaker 1: don't fuck or coop? All right, So we are docking
Speaker 1: next to a boat that is seemingly on fire.
Speaker 4: I don't know if you saw that, but the wind
Speaker 4: is blowing.
Speaker 1: There are a lot of elements here, but the one
Speaker 1: element that they have that nature, doesn't They have a
Speaker 1: natural born leader on this boat, Kermit, No, oh, Joe,
Speaker 1: I was meant to lead.
Speaker 2: I've been put here to lead and lead lead.
Speaker 1: He does, he does.
Speaker 4: They docked the boat.
Speaker 1: Fine, Kaylie throws one of the ropes in the water,
Speaker 1: I think, but it's okay, all right. They've got the
Speaker 1: chef on anchor.
Speaker 3: Turn it this way, which just that way?
Speaker 2: By the way, can you can you imagine actually being
Speaker 2: a paying guess, because we all know that these people
Speaker 2: don't actually pay. They pay the tip. Can you imagine
Speaker 2: going like, wasn't that the person she's the chef for
Speaker 2: one thousand dollars? Yeah, so what that's like, I don't know.
Speaker 2: That's like three grand each. Can you imagine going like,
Speaker 2: was that our chef? What is she doing down there?
Speaker 2: I think she's helping park this boat.
Speaker 1: She actually shook hearing the boat from hitting other boats
Speaker 1: and us possibly die.
Speaker 4: So she's a jack of all trades.
Speaker 1: Excuse me, great job, everybody. Luke has been thinking about
Speaker 1: Joy a lot.
Speaker 2: I the more he obsesses over her, the more I
Speaker 2: hate him, and the more I kind of lose respect
Speaker 2: for her.
Speaker 1: I know, I know it makes me sad. It makes
Speaker 1: me sad because we love Joy. But you gotta, you gotta.
Speaker 4: I don't know that.
Speaker 1: How much more respect can you have for somebody who
Speaker 1: did you just nod to a ghost?
Speaker 2: Well, every once in a while, I know we people
Speaker 2: watch us like we're a TV show on YouTube. So
Speaker 2: as I pour a bottle of champagne because it's Friday,
Speaker 2: I'm joining myself. You know, Okay, I reached my goal weight.
Speaker 3: You know, did you see him not like that? That
Speaker 3: was nuts?
Speaker 4: Go to YouTube subscribe? Oh my, you just winked, like
Speaker 4: bye bye.
Speaker 1: All right. So the thing about losing respect for Luke
Speaker 1: is how much more cratered can your respect for somebody
Speaker 1: who came on their bosses sheets and didn't clean the
Speaker 1: sheets for three days?
Speaker 4: Bright?
Speaker 1: Right, He's just he's got a lot of time on
Speaker 1: his hands. He's just doing quick flybys, just to seven
Speaker 1: different people.
Speaker 2: Well, at some point he text her and he says,
Speaker 2: I really miss you in a By the way, I
Speaker 2: left something on your bed, Hi, Joy, I wanted to
Speaker 2: ask you if.
Speaker 1: When you laid your head on your pillow, you felt
Speaker 1: any kind of crust.
Speaker 4: That's me.
Speaker 2: It's an envel.
Speaker 1: Literally, it was a card.
Speaker 3: Yes, and you're phenomenal at this.
Speaker 1: I'm talking about com What are you talking about?
Speaker 5: I know?
Speaker 3: Why do you just change.
Speaker 1: Into an envelope? Jesus christ Man. All right, let's move on.
Speaker 1: We have to get to a tip meeting. I know
Speaker 1: it was your like, technically it was your premise, but
Speaker 1: it went unsaid. So I took it and said come
Speaker 1: and you said no, it's a note card.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and why would it.
Speaker 1: Be a note card? He comes on.
Speaker 2: Bed, Yeah, I know I'd be funny.
Speaker 1: Okay, So okay, so crunchy. We get to the tip
Speaker 1: meeting and I'm sitting here thinking what are we going
Speaker 1: to do about this tip? Because Nathan bruised his disc right,
Speaker 1: so we're not sure when he's going to come back.
Speaker 1: If Nathan doesn't get his tip, you know what Nathan does.
Speaker 1: He threatens to punch people in the face. So I
Speaker 1: was wondering if they were going to stow that away,
Speaker 1: and they will. But the problem here is that Norma
Speaker 1: has not found a deckhand, so we are not going
Speaker 1: to be getting Nathan back for a good remainder of
Speaker 1: the sea.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he's going to miss the next charter, which I
Speaker 2: think is only one day.
Speaker 1: But Sandy said he's for sure going to miss the
Speaker 1: next charter. We're not sure when he's coming back. So
Speaker 1: Joe is appointed king pants of in the boat right.
Speaker 1: And we also have Luke who has not been with
Speaker 1: us for some time because he climaxed on his boss's sheets.
Speaker 1: So we're going to be going into this charter significantly
Speaker 1: down the tip is what one thousand not bad? Must
Speaker 1: have been a two day charter because they seemed okay
Speaker 1: with it or they were just pad These are the.
Speaker 2: Type of charter guests I like. And this is what's
Speaker 2: wonderful about below Deck is there's a flow to charter guests.
Speaker 2: You can't have too many dickhead guests back to back.
Speaker 1: I don't know that we've had that many dickhead guests,
Speaker 1: and I don't know that we've had that many worthwhile
Speaker 1: or or you know what. I'm trying to make the
Speaker 1: point that the cast is so good this season.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I don't really need the charter, yes to be
Speaker 2: making crazy right.
Speaker 1: The cast is so great. I will say as much
Speaker 1: as we should on Amy and Suzanne that bit only
Speaker 1: grows with every season. I mean season five, six, seven
Speaker 1: of Amy and Susanne.
Speaker 4: Susanne still has not.
Speaker 1: It just gets better and better as that.
Speaker 2: I like Amy getting in our comments, trying to explain
Speaker 2: to us how reality TV is filmed. Thank you Amy.
Speaker 1: Did Amy get in the comments?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah? She was like, guys, you don't You're funny,
Speaker 2: but you don't understand how TV's filmed. Oh thank you
Speaker 2: for that.
Speaker 1: I love Amy.
Speaker 2: I do too.
Speaker 1: I don't want a season of this show to go
Speaker 1: by without Amy, me too. Okay, So Grimace is hatching
Speaker 1: a plant.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, Well she calls her mom and she's so, are.
Speaker 1: We good with We can just call her Grimace for
Speaker 1: the rest of it? Yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: Evil Grimace. Yeah, okay, all right. So she says, Mom,
Speaker 2: I'm not trying to be a negative. This is her warriage,
Speaker 2: not mine. I'm not trying to be a negative angry bitch.
Speaker 2: But it's hard not to her quote not mine. When
Speaker 2: people say things like this, I never know if it's
Speaker 2: an admission just.
Speaker 4: For new listeners. Pat is quoting The.
Speaker 2: Center from Louisiana.
Speaker 1: Joe Kennedy is his name?
Speaker 4: Joe Kennedy?
Speaker 1: Is it Joe. I think his name is John Kennedy, John.
Speaker 2: Kennedy from the wonderful state of Louisian.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: So we had a John Kennedy, he was president. Now
Speaker 1: we have another one who's kind of like a molting
Speaker 1: old Southerner.
Speaker 2: Yes, but not related to that family. No, you know,
Speaker 2: I'm a Kennedy.
Speaker 4: I did.
Speaker 1: Anyway, do you get any like do you get a
Speaker 1: meal ticket of any kind?
Speaker 2: Do you get to go to selcoholism?
Speaker 1: So? Yeah?
Speaker 2: Uh, Jen, So what do you think this is? When
Speaker 2: you make an admission like I'm.
Speaker 1: Not shouldn't really fly anywhere you definitely shouldn't get.
Speaker 2: Oh, I don't have as for dangerous ship like I
Speaker 2: don't want to get Like, hey, let's go I have
Speaker 2: a new sport. Let's do skiing football.
Speaker 1: No, I'm saying the CIA assassinates Kennedy's when they fly.
Speaker 1: It just happened.
Speaker 2: Also when they try and do stuff right right, drive,
Speaker 2: let's go, I know, let's go spearfishing. Next thing you know,
Speaker 2: one of them is fucking you know, got a spear
Speaker 2: through his fucking head right right right, don't do that
Speaker 2: do that stuff. Also, don't drink Okay, all right, all right,
Speaker 2: I'm Kennedy bad all right, Jen, Jen tells us she's
Speaker 2: actually doing extra work to cover up for Kayley's lack
Speaker 2: of experience. Yeah, because you know, like that time when
Speaker 2: there were no plates for the caviar and then you
Speaker 2: ran down to the kitchen and grab some to cover
Speaker 2: up for.
Speaker 1: That, right right right? You didn't do it.
Speaker 2: But you didn't you that, all right, you Grimace.
Speaker 1: You didn't really help. You just kind of saw the mistake,
Speaker 1: and then you went to production. You said, I know
Speaker 1: that we're running dinner right now, but can I sit
Speaker 1: in the confessional and just talk shit on her? Right now?
Speaker 1: That's what you did? Okay, fucking Grimace is in a
Speaker 1: dark spot that's gonna take some real fucking rewiring because
Speaker 1: she is an angry young woman.
Speaker 2: And she's young. She's she's only twenty two. I forget
Speaker 2: all the time. She's only twenty two.
Speaker 1: Jen, You're gonna be fine. You're going to be fine,
Speaker 1: all right. So she she she is going to just
Speaker 1: she's going to talk to her mom. She but she
Speaker 1: can't stand idly by and not mentioned that Kayleie sucks
Speaker 1: and she's a do nothing bitch. So she uh, sorry
Speaker 1: for that little snort, there for the sake of the boat.
Speaker 4: She has to talk to Asha.
Speaker 1: She calls Asha down and says, listen, you know, as
Speaker 1: afore mentioned, I would betray the spirit of this vessel
Speaker 1: of hospitality if I didn't mention that Kaylee sucks at this.
Speaker 4: Kaylee doesn't know what.
Speaker 1: She's doing, and the standard that I'm used to is
Speaker 1: not being met. Very very faulty strategy on Grimace to
Speaker 1: be bringing this up now. One, you do not have
Speaker 1: the high ground because she'll cry about it later, but
Speaker 1: you know it to be true. She doesn't like you.
Speaker 1: You're more qualified than Kaylee.
Speaker 4: She didn't like you, so she picked Kaylee.
Speaker 1: Second, h you know that you can't bring up that
Speaker 1: Kaylee is dropping the ball when she's just been promoted
Speaker 1: to chiefs do an emergency situation, because that's just what's
Speaker 1: just going to swat that down very right. So well,
Speaker 1: this is just.
Speaker 4: Do not have this conversation.
Speaker 2: But this is she's young. I do want to make
Speaker 2: the case for Jen being right here though a little,
Speaker 2: because we dare I say, she's like, well, on the
Speaker 2: boats that I've worked, I think she worked for the
Speaker 2: oligarchy or something, because she says she had to sign
Speaker 2: a NBA that.
Speaker 4: Was like the size of warn piece, yeah or whatever.
Speaker 2: And on these boats there aren't billionaires, And dare I
Speaker 2: say there aren't millionaires? Right, There's just a bunch of fucking.
Speaker 1: People, working class people, that's right.
Speaker 2: So with this idea of people that she wants it
Speaker 2: to be, the standard's very high.
Speaker 1: Can I amend that there are different kinds of working
Speaker 1: class people in this world?
Speaker 4: Now, just like.
Speaker 1: There are different kinds of billionaires. Okay, there are billionaires
Speaker 1: that I mean, we've got a trillionaire, and then there's
Speaker 1: somebody like who's the guy that keeps running for things
Speaker 1: and losing out here? He's that sweet old man that
Speaker 1: keeps running sty Tom sty Now Tom Styr, He's just
Speaker 1: a humble working class bill two bills?
Speaker 4: Okay.
Speaker 1: So there we're just talking about the spectrum. These people
Speaker 1: are filthy economies essentially, is what we're saying. With some money, right.
Speaker 2: And so the case that Gen's making is, look, if
Speaker 2: people actually had standards, they would notice that there's not
Speaker 2: a second fucking plate here, kermit, right.
Speaker 1: If people were chartering this vessel and in their luggage
Speaker 1: were zip ties and lie and plastic bags just in
Speaker 1: case one of the prostitutes kind of acts up. You
Speaker 1: wouldn't be okay with Kaylee.
Speaker 2: Yes, there. Her point is if you break a plate
Speaker 2: on my last boat, they'd fucking throw you out and
Speaker 2: you'd be fed to sharks. And I think that's where,
Speaker 2: like I think later, Kaylee uh points out, like you know,
Speaker 2: nowadays that would be considered a quote unquote toxic work environment.
Speaker 1: Kat says that to her, Yeah, that's right. Yeah, and
Speaker 1: and we'll get to that conversation was insane. Jen is
Speaker 1: like lusting for that, which is just bizarre. Okay, She
Speaker 1: goes down, Yeah, right here, and she says that I'm
Speaker 1: worried that Asha doesn't like me, and she may doesn't
Speaker 1: correct she does not, and that's why you're feeling that.
Speaker 4: That's why this feels kind of like a raw emotion.
Speaker 4: It feels like you've landed on a truth. He does
Speaker 4: not like you.
Speaker 2: And I also think Kat tells her straight up, like
Speaker 2: you need to stop.
Speaker 1: Talking, right Kaka's I've I've done so much to try
Speaker 1: to make this work, and what I'm asking you now
Speaker 1: is to completely change.
Speaker 4: Who you are.
Speaker 2: Can you do that?
Speaker 1: No, I guess, but no, Jen wants to. She wants
Speaker 1: to go back to the toxic nazi like rule that
Speaker 1: she was thriving on. She she can't do this like
Speaker 1: buddy buddy, but I'm not buddy buddy thing, which must
Speaker 1: be quite tormentative. All right, So we head out to dinner.
Speaker 1: We mentioned we're we're going to be getting a day
Speaker 1: off and we're going to be having a special dinner
Speaker 1: this evening. Now I don't know if this is the
Speaker 1: is this our day off at the villa?
Speaker 2: Well, this is the night out followed by the next day,
Speaker 2: which is the day off.
Speaker 1: I know, but I feel like we've gotten better day.
Speaker 1: This felt like.
Speaker 2: Now they all kind of the day off at the villa.
Speaker 2: Always they never are what they should be, which is
Speaker 2: people should be like, oh my god, let's have some
Speaker 2: drinks and go have sex with a random you.
Speaker 1: You have to if they're going to be doing a
Speaker 1: day off, they have to, like I feel like they
Speaker 1: got to sleep there or they gotta have that they
Speaker 1: have done.
Speaker 2: That before, right, Yeah, that doesn't end well. I do
Speaker 2: you remember when Denzel told Will Smith when he punched
Speaker 2: Chris Rock in the face, he said, uh, at your
Speaker 2: greatest moment, the devil will come for you.
Speaker 1: Yes, I do I always and then Will Smith actually
Speaker 1: won the Oscar for Best Actor right after he did that.
Speaker 1: That's right when he should have been thrown out and
Speaker 1: then actually talked to the cops. Right.
Speaker 2: I always say like, whenever you think it's going to
Speaker 2: be a great day, be careful because it could be ruined.
Speaker 2: When it's laid out that it's going to be an
Speaker 2: amazing day, some shit could go down, so be careful.
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's where I have to say. It is a
Speaker 1: little bit of a superpower to just wake up and
Speaker 1: just kind of moan and groan and go, well, I mean.
Speaker 4: This is going to be another one.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you know what I.
Speaker 2: Mean, in a good way or bad way.
Speaker 1: Just in a math way.
Speaker 4: You just go ah, I said, enough fucking oh.
Speaker 1: You know.
Speaker 2: I love my mundane life. That's why I don't like
Speaker 2: to vacation. I like waking up and doing my boring
Speaker 2: nothing life. I don't like having a good day planned
Speaker 2: out for me because it's going to go to shit anyway.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 4: Sorry, Okay, So all right, how long have we been going.
Speaker 4: It feels like we've been going for an hour?
Speaker 2: All right, if we're gonna wrap up, okay, I want
Speaker 2: to talk about dinner in the sky.
Speaker 1: We have so much left.
Speaker 2: This was the first thing that I've seen in the
Speaker 2: hospitality business space where I was like, I could do this.
Speaker 1: What do you mean you could do it? You could
Speaker 1: go up there.
Speaker 2: No, I'm afraid of heights. I wouldn't do it. But
Speaker 2: think about this. There was a crane.
Speaker 4: You start the business.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'm gonna do it, right, I'm going to like
Speaker 2: hire some welders and I'll build the dinner platform. You
Speaker 2: gotta get some steel there.
Speaker 1: You got the fucking the insurance on that, man.
Speaker 2: Well, I'll get through that. You deal with that later,
Speaker 2: all right. Then cranes aren't used on the weekends because
Speaker 2: they're all workdays. You're doing all the building. You go
Speaker 2: to someone it's got owns a fucking crane, Go hey,
Speaker 2: I just need it Friday through Sunday.
Speaker 1: And can I get that crane.
Speaker 2: That you rent it? In the fucking crane and then
Speaker 2: you build the platform. I don't know, one hundred grand
Speaker 2: seatbelts whatever.
Speaker 3: You got the chef, So you're gonna be renting the crane.
Speaker 2: I rent the crane.
Speaker 1: You're gonna have to transport the crane.
Speaker 3: I gotta transport now, Well, let me. Just I rent a.
Speaker 2: Parking lot in the middle of l A. L A
Speaker 2: needs this. I'm not I'm not gonna spend too much time.
Speaker 2: I fell in love with this idea. Okay, alright, hire
Speaker 2: a world renowned chef.
Speaker 1: It's a thousand dollars right now, or mister Wonderful? Can
Speaker 1: I be mister wondering?
Speaker 2: I'm pitching you. Okay, all right, here's my bisiness.
Speaker 3: Okay, but but don't I get to pitch.
Speaker 4: This is what you've already pitched. I'm mister wonderful.
Speaker 1: I have to tell you transporting the crane back and
Speaker 1: forth it seems.
Speaker 4: Like a bad idea.
Speaker 1: It's not. I'm out. Thank you for your TV Babs.
Speaker 2: I don't like you. You know what, Babs, I don't
Speaker 2: like you either wise one of your eyes always close shut.
Speaker 3: I don't like you.
Speaker 2: Let me talk to Mark. What's Ashton coucher to?
Speaker 4: Let me let me be Mark?
Speaker 1: Hi? Mark? Well, yeah, Hi. What you have to do
Speaker 1: here is you have to be upfront with the capitol. Okay,
Speaker 1: you got to buy the crane outright. You have to
Speaker 1: own this crane. What's stopping you from operating dinner service
Speaker 1: Monday through Sunday? Okay, get the crane, get the insurance
Speaker 1: that you'll need to pay for it.
Speaker 4: Lest someone falls out and dies.
Speaker 1: Okay, because it could happen. Sherving out CAOL to the
Speaker 1: people up there. Sounds like a nightmare idea. But you
Speaker 1: got to own everything.
Speaker 2: Market you in a stadium, right.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, Actually those evangelists bastards in Texas took
Speaker 1: it from me.
Speaker 2: Mark, I don't want to work with you, Laurie, Laurie,
Speaker 2: we got to get out of here.
Speaker 1: I got so much for it.
Speaker 2: Here's my point, all right, show, I love this idea
Speaker 2: because you put this fucking thing up in the middle
Speaker 2: of La on a crane, overlooking a beautiful city. You
Speaker 2: sell each seat for a thousand bucks. You do two
Speaker 2: dinners a night. Yeah, uh so that's what twenty grand
Speaker 2: each dinner, forty thousand a night, yep, Friday, forty thousand
Speaker 2: on Saturday Sunday. Let's move on. I think oh uh
Speaker 2: coop uh ignores a cat.
Speaker 1: I think you should charge for different if you want
Speaker 1: to go here, like just hover above the ground a
Speaker 1: little bit.
Speaker 2: Oh a tearsis Yeah, that's sad. No, this isn't the
Speaker 2: fucking Titanic, you son, of a bitch.
Speaker 1: Okay, so it's not snope here, sir. All right, sorry,
Speaker 1: we now we it's so dead. Okay, I want to
Speaker 1: say the dinner. That's why I don't like veal. It's
Speaker 1: too paid. It looked.
Speaker 4: Did you see that hunk of veal?
Speaker 2: It's disgusting.
Speaker 1: Oh my god, just this giant blob of young cow's Meeteugh.
Speaker 2: I won't be serving this kind of stuff in my No,
Speaker 2: you're you're going to do a light a cofusion something
Speaker 2: that's it's gonna be. It's gonna be four courses, it
Speaker 2: will be lots of drinks, cocktails obviously.
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's gonna be great, warm hand towels.
Speaker 2: Okay, So we head out for the I have a mixologist,
Speaker 2: all right.
Speaker 1: We head out for a night in the town. Cooper
Speaker 1: aka the naughtiest man in Croatia and his boats and
Speaker 1: Joe are really hunting.
Speaker 2: They're they're browing it out.
Speaker 4: It's really gross.
Speaker 1: Joe tells his lady friend that he's going to be
Speaker 1: going to talk to women, and it's at this point
Speaker 1: you can tell that he's browning out because you don't
Speaker 1: go up to somebody you're attracted to. And I don't
Speaker 1: even want to talk about like it's yes, it's inappropriate
Speaker 1: to go, hey, I'm gonna go talk to women, but
Speaker 1: what the way you're doing it is such an ick.
Speaker 1: It's so fucking embarrassing that you would only do something
Speaker 1: like this if you were on the verge of blacking out,
Speaker 1: which is what he is.
Speaker 2: Yes, let's add a few layers to this though. He's
Speaker 2: testing her, which he said yeah, because he there's cameras there,
Speaker 2: and what makes scrolls interested in you when you're on sure,
Speaker 2: so he is obviously probably recognizable. He's been done three
Speaker 2: seasons in this fucking bullshit.
Speaker 1: But not to belabor the point, his drinking is even
Speaker 1: making that not a guarantee, which it should be, because
Speaker 1: he's going over to women and going, I was talking
Speaker 1: to my friend.
Speaker 4: It said I could come and talk to you.
Speaker 1: Imagine you're a stranger and some fucking person comes up
Speaker 1: to you and says that you go, what are you
Speaker 1: talking about? What the fuck are you talking about?
Speaker 5: Right?
Speaker 1: Which friend? What is going on? So we head home
Speaker 1: and Joe continues to embarrass himself quite a bit. He
Speaker 1: keeps telling Kayley that she passed the test, and she says,
Speaker 1: you need to go to bed.
Speaker 2: Well, actually, she says, God, what was the you're not
Speaker 2: getting She goes, Uh, I think she says Joe. She
Speaker 2: lets Joe the bro know because he was a hoe.
Speaker 2: Her coach will not will be a no show.
Speaker 1: Good night, and that concludes Patty's limericks.
Speaker 5: All right.
Speaker 2: By the way, we got to touch on the k thing.
Speaker 2: She's so disappointed. It was a tough This was a
Speaker 2: tough lesson for Patty to learn back in the day
Speaker 2: that you don't know someone you know, that's right. I
Speaker 2: feel so bad for her. I feel so bad for her.
Speaker 2: She's so cute.
Speaker 1: But yeah, what what lesson did you?
Speaker 2: But she doesn't know this motherfucker.
Speaker 1: Right right right? She does, though she's keeping him at
Speaker 1: it at arms distance.
Speaker 4: She's she's doing really, really well.
Speaker 2: And then uh called her buddy.
Speaker 3: Uh Cat did yeah, Cat did?
Speaker 1: Yeah?
Speaker 4: Yeah a Sean.
Speaker 1: Yeah.
Speaker 4: She goes, I can't believe this is happening, and she.
Speaker 2: Wants to leave.
Speaker 1: And Cooper, we should say, is just a gargantuan asshole
Speaker 1: to her the entire evening. Uh, he's just behaving like
Speaker 1: a boy. He's a man, you know, change the behavior.
Speaker 2: I would.
Speaker 3: I don't mind it.
Speaker 2: I would argue reverse the roles. If a girl decided like, ah,
Speaker 2: I'm kinda freed.
Speaker 1: It would be fine. But but what I'm about was
Speaker 1: about to say, is like, you can't do the southern
Speaker 1: gentleman thing and then do this because you're just You're
Speaker 1: just treating her like any any fuck boy would. So
Speaker 1: if you're gonna differentiate yourself and go, people don't open
Speaker 1: the doors anymore. You know, I can't believe people are
Speaker 1: treating women like this.
Speaker 4: I was raised better, and then you just fucking okay.
Speaker 1: So Asha is surprised about how Cooper was evolving. She's
Speaker 1: a little disappointed because she comes to realize that he
Speaker 1: is in fact male, and he has also caught the
Speaker 1: travel bug because he's running from internal demons, which makes
Speaker 1: him a sea rat, a dastardly combination of womanizing and
Speaker 1: a morality. So we hit the beach club. Luke is
Speaker 1: sending some videos. He's checking in on Joy and yeah,
Speaker 1: it's very dramatic, but the point is taken. Jen rrupts
Speaker 1: out of her seat because they all to mental health problems.
Speaker 2: Well, they all toast to a man who turned his
Speaker 2: boss's sheets into a cumbrella.
Speaker 1: Yes, Pat he shot his He shot his ball barf
Speaker 1: onto his boss's cumbrella.
Speaker 2: Ella, making it ella cumbrella on my cumborella.
Speaker 1: We love saying that's something that a lot of people
Speaker 1: don't know.
Speaker 4: We love it. We have such a good time doing it.
Speaker 2: Next day and played two women off each other, he said,
Speaker 2: fucking scumback.
Speaker 1: No, not next day, Cooper finally has the conversation.
Speaker 4: He sits down with you know what.
Speaker 1: Sorry, They toast him, and multiple people say he was
Speaker 1: a great man.
Speaker 2: I know, and I was sinking like Abraham Lincoln was
Speaker 2: a great man. I wonder if he ever came on
Speaker 2: his friend's.
Speaker 1: Log bed, I know, like Andrew Jackson, I'm sure a
Speaker 1: lot of people and he was just like, I want
Speaker 1: you to kill as many Indians and Mexicans as humanly.
Speaker 2: Possible, and then he came on.
Speaker 1: I don't know, but at least he didn't come on
Speaker 1: any at least Andrew Jackson may have slaughtered innocence, but
Speaker 1: he didn't turn anyone's bed into a cumbrella.
Speaker 4: Ah, it's it's that's a dark history of this country.
Speaker 3: You know, most countries do, for sure.
Speaker 1: All Right, So Coop and Chat finally have Coop and
Speaker 1: Cat finally have the chat.
Speaker 4: He says, Hey, listen, you're a girl. I don't want
Speaker 4: to talk.
Speaker 1: Okay, we just an insane way to go about this.
Speaker 1: And Asia realizes that Jen being mad at Kaylee and
Speaker 1: Jen being mad about Luke and her being Grimace and evil,
Speaker 1: and Joe and Kaylee being on the Fritz and Cooper
Speaker 1: and Cat.
Speaker 4: The vibe is off here.
Speaker 1: But there's one thing that can save the day. That
Speaker 1: is a merenga.
Speaker 2: Yeah what, I fucking hate that. We'll have to extract
Speaker 2: her propensity to grab things like that out of her
Speaker 2: DNA to make the superhuman being.
Speaker 1: How do you want? What is the voice of the
Speaker 1: super being? Do we just speak in olms? Like?
Speaker 4: Whose voice is it?
Speaker 2: I think it sounds something like Barman.
Speaker 4: Everyone sounds like.
Speaker 2: History hmm, Andy, do frame nice man?
Speaker 1: And maybe a different voice, stronger.
Speaker 2: I can't have sex with that voice.
Speaker 1: You imagine if your wife's sounded like Morgan Freeman and
Speaker 1: recounting the history of him and his gay lover who
Speaker 1: he met in prison.
Speaker 4: He burst out of that pipe and I burst into.
Speaker 2: His He went through a thousand yards.
Speaker 1: All right, we have to have our show, all right,
Speaker 1: so uh, next day, But first we get an announcement
Speaker 1: or next day we get an announcement, but first time
Speaker 1: for pred friend shape Marry. We've got Bunny Bunny an
Speaker 1: economics club whatever that means.
Speaker 2: They do not give us any info. A bunch of guests.
Speaker 2: They look pretty hot. But yeah, the major thing, I
Speaker 2: major takeaway is there some picky motherfuckers, mostly vegetarian.
Speaker 1: They want gluten free stuff at night. This is going
Speaker 1: to be a tough charter. We've got Judah, We've got Sequoia.
Speaker 1: They're picky, they're gonna want things late at night. And
Speaker 1: from the trailer.
Speaker 2: It looks like Kaylee.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's gonna be tough.
Speaker 1: So Kaylee and Jen have a little chat and it
Speaker 1: ends with Jen saying I'm glad we spoke. In her interview,
Speaker 1: I'm glad we spoke, but I would after this conversation
Speaker 1: has kind of cleared the air and I as grim
Speaker 1: as feel like I would watch Kaylee burn to death
Speaker 1: and smile, she says, and I quote, if Kaylee was
Speaker 1: on fire, I would not use my strongest host for
Speaker 1: what what is the problem here? Why do you hate
Speaker 1: her so much?
Speaker 2: Because she's twenty two?
Speaker 1: Get in the comments let us know did you have
Speaker 1: the bile and hatred in your gut at the age
Speaker 1: of twenty two, I did wish Piro death on someone
Speaker 1: who's done absolutely nothing to you. Let us know what
Speaker 1: else you'd get. How excited are you for the sexy
Speaker 1: photo shoot? Did you see the Odyssey? Did you get it?
Speaker 1: That's it I'm doing.
Speaker 4: Say goodbye?
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's so deep. Are you fucking kidding?
Speaker 2: Bye guys, Bye guys.
Speaker 1: I can't say bye.
Speaker 5: Yeah. The Distan