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<v Speaker 1>Section fifteen of we Featuring Records thirty and thirty one.

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<v Speaker 1>This is LibriVox recording. All LibriVox recordings are in the

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<v Speaker 1>public domain. For more information or to volunteer, please visit

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<v Speaker 1>LibriVox dot org. Qui by Yevgenis Amuten, translated by Gregory Zilberg.

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<v Speaker 1>Record thirty the last number Galileo's mistake? Would it not

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<v Speaker 1>be better? Here is my conversation with I three thirty,

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<v Speaker 1>which took place in the ancient house yesterday, in the

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<v Speaker 1>midst of loud noise, among colors which stifled the logical

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<v Speaker 1>course of my thoughts red green, bronze, saffron, yellow, orange colors,

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<v Speaker 1>and all the while under the motionless marble smile of

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<v Speaker 1>that snub nosed ancient poet. I shall reproduce the conversation

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<v Speaker 1>word by word, for it seems to me that it

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<v Speaker 1>may have an enormous and decisive importance for the fate

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<v Speaker 1>of the United States, more than that for the fate

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<v Speaker 1>of the universe. Besides reading it, you, my unknown readers,

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<v Speaker 1>may find some justification for me. I three thirty, without preliminaries,

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<v Speaker 1>at once threw everything upon my head. I know that

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<v Speaker 1>the day after tomorrow the first trial trip of the

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<v Speaker 1>Integral is to take place on that day. We shall

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<v Speaker 1>take possession of it. What day after tomorrow? Yes, sit

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<v Speaker 1>down and don't be upset. We cannot afford to lose

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<v Speaker 1>a minute. Among the hundreds who were arrested yesterday there

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<v Speaker 1>were twenty mefis. To let pass two or three days

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<v Speaker 1>means that they will perish. I was silent as observers

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<v Speaker 1>on the trial trip. They will send electricians, mechanicians, physicians, meteorologists,

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<v Speaker 1>et cetera. At twelve sharp, you must remember this. When

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<v Speaker 1>the bell rings for dinner, we shall remain in the passage,

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<v Speaker 1>lock them all up in the dining hall, and the

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<v Speaker 1>Integral be ours. You realize that it is most necessary happen.

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<v Speaker 1>What may The Integral in our hands will be a

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<v Speaker 1>tool that will help us put in an into everything

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<v Speaker 1>at once without pain their arrows, they would be insignificant

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<v Speaker 1>mosquitoes against a buzzard. And then, if it proves inevitable,

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<v Speaker 1>we may direct the tubes of the motors downward, and

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<v Speaker 1>by their work alone, I jumped up. It is inconceivable,

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<v Speaker 1>it is absurd. Is it not clear to you that

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<v Speaker 1>what you are contriving is a revolution? Yes? A revolution.

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<v Speaker 1>Why is it absurd? Absurd? Because a revolution is impossible,

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<v Speaker 1>Because our I speak for myself and for you, our

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<v Speaker 1>revolution was the last one. No other revolutions may occur.

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<v Speaker 1>Everybody knows that a mocking sharp triangle of brows. My dear,

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<v Speaker 1>you are a mathematician, are you not more than that?

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<v Speaker 1>A philosopher? Mathematician? Well, then name the last number? What

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<v Speaker 1>is I cannot understand which last? The last one? The

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<v Speaker 1>highest to the largest I three thirty. It is absurd

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<v Speaker 1>since the number of numbers is in How can there

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<v Speaker 1>be a last one? And why then do you think

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<v Speaker 1>there is a last revolution? There is no last revolution?

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<v Speaker 1>Their number is infinite. The last one is a children's story.

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<v Speaker 1>Children are afraid of the infinite, and it is necessary

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<v Speaker 1>that children should not be frightened, so that they may

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<v Speaker 1>sleep through the night. But what is the use? What

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<v Speaker 1>is the use of it all for the sake of

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<v Speaker 1>the well doer? What is the use? Since all are

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<v Speaker 1>happy already? All right? Even suppose that is so? What further?

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<v Speaker 1>How funny a purely childish question? You tell something to

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<v Speaker 1>children come to the very end, Yet they will invariably

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<v Speaker 1>ask you what further? And what for children? Are the

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<v Speaker 1>only courageous philosophers. And courageous philosophers are invariably children. One

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<v Speaker 1>ought always to ask, like children, what further? Nothing further?

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<v Speaker 1>Period in the whole world evenly everywhere there is distributed

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<v Speaker 1>ah evenly everywhere. That is the point entropy, psychological entropy.

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<v Speaker 1>Don't you with the mathematician, know that only differences, only

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<v Speaker 1>differences in temperature, only thermic contrast, make for life. And

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<v Speaker 1>if all over the world they are evenly warm or

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<v Speaker 1>evenly cold bodies, they must be pushed off in order

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<v Speaker 1>to get flame explosions. And we shall push but I

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<v Speaker 1>three thirty. Please realize that our ancestors during the Two

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<v Speaker 1>Hundred Years War did exactly that. Oh, they were right

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<v Speaker 1>a thousand times right. It did one wrong thing. However,

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<v Speaker 1>later they began to believe that they were the last number,

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<v Speaker 1>a number that does not exist in nature. Their mistake

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<v Speaker 1>was the mistake of Galileo. He was right in that

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<v Speaker 1>the Earth revolves around the Sun, but he did not

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<v Speaker 1>know that our whole solar system revolves about some other center.

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<v Speaker 1>He did not know that the real, not relative, orbit

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<v Speaker 1>of the Earth is not a naive circle. And you,

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<v Speaker 1>the MEFI, we for the time being, we know that

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<v Speaker 1>there is no last number. We may forget that some day.

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<v Speaker 1>Of course, we shall certainly forget it when we grow old.

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<v Speaker 1>As everything inevitably grows old, then we shall inevitably fall

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<v Speaker 1>like autumn leaves from the trees, like you the day

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<v Speaker 1>after tomorrow. No, no, dear, not you personally, You are

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<v Speaker 1>with us, are you not? You are with us? Flaming, stormy, sparkling.

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<v Speaker 1>I never before had seen her in such a state.

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<v Speaker 1>She embraced me with her whole self. I disappeared, her

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<v Speaker 1>last word, looking steadily deeply into my eyes. Then, do

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<v Speaker 1>not forget? At twelve o'clock sharp, and I answered, yes,

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<v Speaker 1>I remember. She left. I was alone amidst a rebellious,

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<v Speaker 1>multi voiced commotion of blue, red, green, saffron, yellow, and orange.

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<v Speaker 1>Yes at twelve Suddenly a feeling of something foreign on

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<v Speaker 1>my face, of something implanted that can not be brushed off. Suddenly,

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<v Speaker 1>yesterday morning, and you and all, she shouted into the

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<v Speaker 1>face of I three thirty. Why, how absurd? I hastened

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<v Speaker 1>to get out of the house and home home. Somewhere

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<v Speaker 1>behind me, I heard the chattering of birds beyond the

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<v Speaker 1>wall and ahead of me in the setting sun, the

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<v Speaker 1>balls of cupolas made of red crystallized fire, enormous flaming cubes, houses,

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<v Speaker 1>and the sharp point of the accumulating tower high in

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<v Speaker 1>the sky, like a paralyzed streak of lightning. And all this,

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<v Speaker 1>all this impeccable, most geometric beauty. Shall I I myself

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<v Speaker 1>with my hands? Is there no way out, no path,

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<v Speaker 1>no trail. I passed by an auditorium. I do not

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<v Speaker 1>recall its number. Inside the benches were stacked along the walls.

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<v Speaker 1>In the middle tables covered with snow white glass sheets

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<v Speaker 1>with pink stains of sunny blood on the white. There

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<v Speaker 1>was foreshadowed, and all that some unknown and therefore alarming tomorrow.

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<v Speaker 1>It is unnatural for a thinking and seeing human being

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<v Speaker 1>to live among irregularities unknowns x's. If suddenly your eyes

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<v Speaker 1>were covered with a bandage, and you were let go,

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<v Speaker 1>to feel around, to stumble, ever, aware that somewhere very

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<v Speaker 1>close to you there is the borderline. One step only

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<v Speaker 1>in nothing but a compressed, smothered piece of flesh will

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<v Speaker 1>be left of you. I now feel somewhat like that.

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<v Speaker 1>And what if, without waiting for anything, I should just

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<v Speaker 1>head down? Would it not be the only right thing

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<v Speaker 1>to do, to disentangle everything at once, Record thirty one,

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<v Speaker 1>the great operation I forgave everything, the collision of trains,

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<v Speaker 1>saved at the very last moment, when it seemed that

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<v Speaker 1>there was nothing left to hold on to, that it

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<v Speaker 1>was the end. It was as if you already ascended

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<v Speaker 1>the steps towards the threatening machine of the well doer,

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<v Speaker 1>whereas if the great glass, with a heavy thud, already

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<v Speaker 1>covered you, and for the last time in your life,

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<v Speaker 1>you looked at the blue sky, to swallow it with

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<v Speaker 1>your eyes, when suddenly it was only a dream. The

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<v Speaker 1>sun is pink and cheerful, and the wall. What happiness

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<v Speaker 1>to be able to touch the cold wall, and the pillow,

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<v Speaker 1>to delight endlessly in the little cavity formed by your

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<v Speaker 1>own head in the white pillow. This is approximately what

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<v Speaker 1>I felt when I read the State Journal this morning.

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<v Speaker 1>It had all been a terrible dream, and this dream

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<v Speaker 1>is over, and I was so feeble, so unfaithful, that

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<v Speaker 1>I thought of selfish voluntary death. I am ashamed now

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<v Speaker 1>to reread the last lines of yesterday, but let them

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<v Speaker 1>remain as a memory of that incredible might have happened,

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<v Speaker 1>which will not happen. On the front page of the

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<v Speaker 1>State Journal. The following gleamed, Rejoice, for from now on

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<v Speaker 1>we are perfect. Before today, your own creation in engines

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<v Speaker 1>were more perfect than you. Why, for every spark from

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<v Speaker 1>a dynamo is a spark of pure reason, each motion

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<v Speaker 1>of a piston a pure syllogism. Is it not true

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<v Speaker 1>that the same faultless reason is within you? The philosophy

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<v Speaker 1>of the cranes, presses, and pumps is finished and clear,

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<v Speaker 1>like a circle. But is your philosophy less circular? The

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<v Speaker 1>beauty of a mechanism lies in its immutable, precise rhythm,

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<v Speaker 1>like that of a pendulum. But have you not become

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<v Speaker 1>as precise as a pendulum, you who are brought up

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<v Speaker 1>on the system of tailor. Yes, but there is one difference.

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<v Speaker 1>Mechanisms have no fancy. Did you ever notice a pump

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<v Speaker 1>cylinder during its work show upon its face a wide, distant,

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<v Speaker 1>sensuously dreaming smile. Did you ever hear cranes restlessly toss

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<v Speaker 1>about and sigh at night during the hours designed for

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<v Speaker 1>rest No yet on your faces? You may well blush

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<v Speaker 1>with shame. The guardians have seen more and more frequently

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<v Speaker 1>those smiles, and they have heard your sighs and you

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<v Speaker 1>should hide your eyes for shame. The historians of the

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<v Speaker 1>United States all tendered their resignations so as to be

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<v Speaker 1>relieved from having to record such shameful occurrences. It is

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<v Speaker 1>not your fault. You are ill, and the name of

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<v Speaker 1>your illness is fancy. It is a worm that gnaws

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<v Speaker 1>black wrinkles on one's forehead. It is a fever that

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<v Speaker 1>drives one to run farther and farther, albeit farther may

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<v Speaker 1>begin where happiness ends. It is the last barricade on

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<v Speaker 1>our road to happiness. Rejoice, this barricade has been blasted.

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<v Speaker 1>At last. The road is open. The latest discovery of

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<v Speaker 1>our state science is that there is a center for fancy,

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<v Speaker 1>a miserable, little nervous knot in the lower region of

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<v Speaker 1>the frontal lobe of the brain. A triple treatment of

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<v Speaker 1>this knot with X rays will cure you of fancy.

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<v Speaker 1>Forever you are perfect, you are mechanized. The road to

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<v Speaker 1>one hundred percent happiness is open. Hastened, then, all of you,

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<v Speaker 1>young and old, hasten to undergo the great operation. Hasten

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<v Speaker 1>to the auditoriums where the great operation is being performed.

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<v Speaker 1>Long live the Great Operation, Long live the United State,

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<v Speaker 1>Long live the well doer. You Had you read all

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<v Speaker 1>this not in my records, which look like an ancient,

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<v Speaker 1>strange novel. Had you, like me, held in your trembling

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<v Speaker 1>hands the newspaper, smelling of typographic ink. If you knew

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<v Speaker 1>as I do, that all this is most certain reality,

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<v Speaker 1>If not the reality of today, then that of tomorrow.

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<v Speaker 1>Would you not feel the very things I feel? Would

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<v Speaker 1>not your head whirl as mine does? Would there not

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<v Speaker 1>run over your back and arms those strange, sweet icy needles.

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<v Speaker 1>Would you not feel that you were a giant an atlas,

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<v Speaker 1>that if only you stood up and straightened out, you

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<v Speaker 1>would reach the ceiling with your head. I snatched the

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<v Speaker 1>telephone receiver, Hi three thirty, Yes, yes, yes, three thirty,

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<v Speaker 1>And then, swallowing my own words, I shouted, are you

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<v Speaker 1>at home? Yes? Have you read your reading now? Is

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<v Speaker 1>it not? Is it not stupendous? Yes? A long dark silence.

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<v Speaker 1>The wires buzzed, almost imperceptibly. She was thinking, I must

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<v Speaker 1>see you today without fail, Yes, in my room, after

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<v Speaker 1>sixteen without fail. Dear, she is such a deer without fail.

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<v Speaker 1>I was smiling, and I could not stop. I felt

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<v Speaker 1>I should carry that smile with me into the street

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<v Speaker 1>like a light above my head. Outside, the wind ran

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<v Speaker 1>over me, whirling, whistling, whipping, But I felt even more cheerful.

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<v Speaker 1>All right, go on, go on, moaning and groaning. The

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<v Speaker 1>walls cannot be torn down. Flying leaden clouds broke over

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<v Speaker 1>my head. Well let them. They could not eclipse the sun.

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<v Speaker 1>We chained it to the zenith, like so many Joshua's

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<v Speaker 1>son of nuns. At the corner, a group of Joshua's

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<v Speaker 1>son of Nuns were standing with the foreheads pasted to

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<v Speaker 1>the glass of the wall. Inside, on a dazzling white table,

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<v Speaker 1>already a number lay. One could see two naked souls

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<v Speaker 1>diverging from under the sheet in a yellow angle, white

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<v Speaker 1>medecks bent over his head, a white hand, a stretched

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<v Speaker 1>out hand holding a syringe filled with something. And you,

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<v Speaker 1>what are you waiting for? I asked, nobody in particular,

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<v Speaker 1>or rather all of them, and you, someone's round head

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<v Speaker 1>turned to me. I oh, afterwards, I must first somewhat confused,

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<v Speaker 1>I left the place I really had to see I

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<v Speaker 1>three thirty first, But why first? I could not explain myself.

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<v Speaker 1>The docks, the integral bluish like ice was glistening and sparkling.

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<v Speaker 1>The engine was caressingly grumbling, repeating some one word as

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<v Speaker 1>if it were my word, a familiar one. I bent

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<v Speaker 1>down and stroked the long cold tube of the motor. Dear,

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<v Speaker 1>what a deer tube. Tomorrow it will come to life

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<v Speaker 1>tomorrow for the first time. It will tremble with burning,

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<v Speaker 1>flaming streams in its boughs. With what eyes would I

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<v Speaker 1>have looked at the glass monster had everything remained as

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<v Speaker 1>it was yesterday. If I knew that tomorrow at twelve,

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<v Speaker 1>I should betray it. Yes, betray Someone behind cautiously touched

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<v Speaker 1>my elbow. I turned around the plate like flat face

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<v Speaker 1>of the second builder. Do you know already? He asked?

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<v Speaker 1>What about the operation? Yes? How everything everything suddenly? No,

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<v Speaker 1>not that the trial flight is put off until day

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<v Speaker 1>after tomorrow on account of that operation. They rushed us

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<v Speaker 1>for nothing we heard on account of the operation, honey,

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<v Speaker 1>limited man. He could see no further than his own platter.

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<v Speaker 1>If only he knew that but for the operation tomorrow

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<v Speaker 1>at twelve, he would be locked up in a glass cage,

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<v Speaker 1>would be tossing about, trying to climb the walls. At

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<v Speaker 1>twelve thirty, when I came into my room. I saw you.

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<v Speaker 1>She was sitting at my table, firm, straight, bone like,

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<v Speaker 1>resting her right cheek on her hand. She must have

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<v Speaker 1>waited for a long time, because when she brusquely rose

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<v Speaker 1>to meet me, there remained on her cheek five white

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<v Speaker 1>imprints of her fingers. For a second, that terrible morning

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<v Speaker 1>came back to me. She beside, I three thirty indignant,

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<v Speaker 1>But for a second only all was at once washed

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<v Speaker 1>off by the sun of today, as it happened sometime

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<v Speaker 1>when you enter your room on a bright day and

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<v Speaker 1>absent mindedly turn on the light. The bulb shines, but

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<v Speaker 1>it is out of place, droll, unnecessary. Without hesitation, I

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<v Speaker 1>held up my hand to her. I forgave her everything.

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<v Speaker 1>She firmly grasped both my hands and pressed them till

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<v Speaker 1>they hurt. Her cheeks, quivering and hanging down like ancient

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<v Speaker 1>precious ornaments, she said with emotion, I was waiting. I

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<v Speaker 1>want only one moment. I only wanted to say how happy,

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<v Speaker 1>how joyous I am for you. You realize, of course,

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<v Speaker 1>that tomorrow or day after tomorrow, you will be healthy again,

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<v Speaker 1>as if born anew. I noticed my papers on the table,

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<v Speaker 1>the last two pages of my record of yesterday. They

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<v Speaker 1>were in the place where I left them the night before.

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<v Speaker 1>If only she knew what I wrote there, although I

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<v Speaker 1>did not care. After all, now it was only history.

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<v Speaker 1>It was the ridiculously far off distance, like an image

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<v Speaker 1>through reversed opera glass. Yes, I said, a while ago,

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<v Speaker 1>while passing through the avenue, I saw a man walking

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<v Speaker 1>ahead of me, his shadow stretched along the pavement. And

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<v Speaker 1>think of it, His shadow was luminous. I think more

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<v Speaker 1>than that. I am absolutely certain that tomorrow all shadows

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<v Speaker 1>will disappear, not a shadow from any person or anything.

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<v Speaker 1>The sun will be shining through everything. She gently and earnestly.

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<v Speaker 1>You are a dreamer. I should not allow my children

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<v Speaker 1>in school to talk that way. She told me something

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<v Speaker 1>about the children, that they were all led in one

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<v Speaker 1>herd to the operation, that it was necessary to bind

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<v Speaker 1>them afterwards with rope, and that one must love pitilessly, yes, pitilessly,

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<v Speaker 1>and that she thought she might finally decide to She

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<v Speaker 1>smoothed out the grayish blue fold of the unif that

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<v Speaker 1>fell between her knees, swiftly pasted her smile all over me,

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<v Speaker 1>and went out. Fortunately, the sun did not stop today.

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<v Speaker 1>The sun was running. It was already sixteen o'clock. I

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<v Speaker 1>was knocking at the door. My heart was knocking. Come in.

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<v Speaker 1>I threw myself upon the floor near her chair, to

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<v Speaker 1>embrace her limbs, to lift my head upward, and look

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<v Speaker 1>into her eyes, first into one and then into the other,

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<v Speaker 1>and in each of them, to see the reflection of

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<v Speaker 1>myself in wonderful captivity. There beyond the wall that looked stormy,

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<v Speaker 1>there the clouds were let in, let them be. My

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<v Speaker 1>head was overcrowded with impetuous words, and I was speaking aloud,

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<v Speaker 1>and flying with the sun. I knew not where, No,

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<v Speaker 1>now we know where we are flying. Planets were following me,

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<v Speaker 1>planets sparking with flame and populated with fiery, singing flowers,

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<v Speaker 1>and mute planets, blue ones where rational stones were unified

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<v Speaker 1>into one organized society, and planets which like our own Earth,

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<v Speaker 1>had reached already the apex of one hundred percent happiness.

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<v Speaker 1>Suddenly from above, And don't you think that at the

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<v Speaker 1>apex are precisely stones unified into an organized society. The

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<v Speaker 1>triangle grew sharper and sharper, darker and darker happiness. Well,

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<v Speaker 1>desires are tortures, are they not? It is clear therefore,

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<v Speaker 1>that happiness is where there are no longer any desires,

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<v Speaker 1>not a single desire anymore. What an error, What an

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<v Speaker 1>absurd prejudice? It was that formerly we would mark happiness

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<v Speaker 1>with the sign plus. No, absolute happiness must be marked

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<v Speaker 1>minus divine minus. I remember, I stammered, unintelligibly, absolute zero

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<v Speaker 1>minus two hundred and seventy three degrees centigrade minus two

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<v Speaker 1>hundred and seventy three degrees exactly, a somewhat cool temperature.

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<v Speaker 1>But does it not prove that we are at the

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<v Speaker 1>summit as before? She seemed somehow to speak for me

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<v Speaker 1>and through me, developing to the end my own thoughts.

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<v Speaker 1>But there was something so morbid in her tone that

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<v Speaker 1>I could not refrain. With an effort. I drought a no. No,

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<v Speaker 1>I said you you are mocking. She burst out, laughing loudly,

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<v Speaker 1>too loudly, swiftly. In a second she laughed herself to

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<v Speaker 1>some unseen edge, stumbled and fell over silence. She stood up,

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<v Speaker 1>put her hands upon my shoulders, and looked at to

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<v Speaker 1>me for a long while. Then she pulled me toward her,

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<v Speaker 1>and everything seemed to have disappeared save her sharp, hot lips. Goodbye.

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<v Speaker 1>The words came from afar, from above and reached me,

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<v Speaker 1>not at once, only after a minute, perhaps two minutes later.

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<v Speaker 1>Why why goodbye? You have been ill? Have you not

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<v Speaker 1>because of me? You have committed crimes? Has not all

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<v Speaker 1>this tormented you? And now you have the operation to

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<v Speaker 1>look forward to. You will be cured of me? And

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<v Speaker 1>that means goodbye? No, I cried, a pitilessly sharp black

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<v Speaker 1>triangle in a white background. What do you mean that

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<v Speaker 1>you don't want happiness? My head was breaking into pieces.

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<v Speaker 1>Two logical trains collided and crawled upon each other, rattling

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<v Speaker 1>and smothering. Well, I am waiting. You must choose the

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<v Speaker 1>operation and one hundred percent happiness, or I cannot without you.

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<v Speaker 1>I must not without you, I said, Or perhaps I

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<v Speaker 1>only thought. I am not sure which, but I three

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<v Speaker 1>thirty heard. Yes, I know, she said, then, her hands

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<v Speaker 1>still on my shoulders and her eyes not letting mine go.

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<v Speaker 1>Then until tomorrow, tomorrow at twelve you remember, No, it

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<v Speaker 1>was postponed for a day day after tomorrow, So much

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<v Speaker 1>the better for us. At twelve, day after tomorrow, I

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<v Speaker 1>walked alone in the dusky street. The wind was whirling, carrying,

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<v Speaker 1>driving me like a piece of paper. Fragments of the

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<v Speaker 1>leaden sky were soaring, soaring, they had to soar through

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<v Speaker 1>the infinite for another day or two. Unifs of numbers

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<v Speaker 1>were brushing my sides, yet I was walking alone. It

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<v Speaker 1>was clear to me that all were saved, but that

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<v Speaker 1>there was no salvation for me, or I do not

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<v Speaker 1>want salvation. End of Section fifteen.