Speaker 1: Come call round, Dirty, Come he did the gin?
Speaker 2: Join the questing is uncharted.
Speaker 1: Join the Icy bast.
Speaker 2: Six writers face off by a roll of the dice
Hell Fight Dirty Leeping, nothing behind but wigapits at a tall.
Speaker 1: Tale stealing heart breaking fats with plenty of.
Speaker 3: Time to kill Icy.
Speaker 4: Bastards.
Speaker 2: Ten Piso always.
Speaker 3: Icing Now they can't be trusting basters.
Speaker 1: Come and join Itenticing Bastard.
Speaker 2: Hey, there're a and Devians, Junior mentors and friends. Welcome
to the next episode of The Dicey Bassar Season two.
I'm Mk Gibsinger, Hose Dungeon masser and author of the
Shadow Master series. My latest book, Villain's Academy, is out
now on audio. Please buy it. I like food. Who
do I with me today? Same oldcasts, but they're better
than ever?
Speaker 4: How do I know?
Speaker 2: Because I know? Let's start with better than Ever? Robert
Bevin Bevan, What makes you better than Ever?
Speaker 5: The Critical Failures ten audio book.
Speaker 2: Which I just finished. Thank you got the review for
you and everything.
Speaker 5: I appreciate that. Yeah, this announcement is probably pretty old
by now, but uh it's finally out.
Speaker 4: Go get it.
Speaker 2: We're new if you're Canadian.
Speaker 5: Yeah, yeah, hello everyone, my name is Robert Bevin. I
played the role of Duelso the Sorcerer, the Sorcerer with
the Moss and all right, uh, I write books right
the Conference and Creature series. I already opened with the
big announcement, So yeah, there you go.
Speaker 2: You wanna close with a small announcement?
Speaker 1: Uh?
Speaker 4: No, okay?
Speaker 2: Good uh? Speaking of small announcement, Rick Qualteria, what makes
you better than ever?
Speaker 6: Ah? Uh? Is it?
Speaker 2: Mike the Werewolf?
Speaker 6: Sure?
Speaker 4: Why not? I don't know what makes me?
Speaker 2: He's a great back and forth guy. This guy can
hold a mic down.
Speaker 4: I'm just surviving man. Anyway.
Speaker 7: My name is Ric Qualitiion and I play moo moo
boo boom boom boom boo, which is about as close
as singing as you're gonna hear from me.
Speaker 1: Ever move.
Speaker 4: Yeah what they signed? In real life?
Speaker 7: I write several things, including Mike the Werewolf was It,
which isn't out yet, but hopefully we'll be out soon
because I still have to edit the god End thing.
Speaker 2: So yeah, all right, thank you, sir, Drew, Hey, sir,
what makes you better than ever?
Speaker 6: Ah? Clean, living tall life and of course the ornis
borgnine answer, But that's more up, Bob z Alli, not
to mention the fact that by this point everyone will
have gotten to enjoy Villains Vignette's Volume two in print
an ebook. Not to mention Villain's Code number three Chilling
Reflections out in audiobook after Long Last, and they'll have
the opportunity to come see the Bigger, Better in Me
at lit RPG Con this July, which should be pretty
close to the time when this is coming out. So
come on up to Denver if you're around.
Speaker 2: Jesus, that's a lot. Emily Kaplan, can you literally top that?
Do you have the tall privilege that Drew enjoys? What
makes you better than ever?
Speaker 3: Emily tall privilege? Very funny? Funny? Kim Claudia the Rugue,
Claudia the Rugue? What's in her head? Nobody knows? Wears
a hat made from a bear, good or bad? She
doesn't care.
Speaker 2: I like that, Yeah, Spider Man Ramon's actually.
Speaker 3: And I read books under E. M. Kaplan, like the
Josie Tucker Mysteries, which you should all have read by now.
Speaker 2: I still I'm still thinking about Emily, but Drew's Can
I switch the two of you? Like a Freaky Friday
kind of situation. I would love that.
Speaker 1: Emily would go mad with power and say this giant
Emily sounds terrifying.
Speaker 2: I want to there, want to see a five foot
nothing Drew and like a six foot four Emily.
Speaker 6: So I truly cannot fathom that it has. It took
me until like my late twenties to realize people lied
about height.
Speaker 4: Like bets.
Speaker 1: It would be if Drew was a mac and Emily
was piloting him.
Speaker 2: I'm more okay with that dread four eleven heights? Like,
what's with all these farts?
Speaker 6: I don't like this?
Speaker 2: You know, see whether what makes you better than ever?
Speaker 6: Sir?
Speaker 1: Well, I recently gave up smoking, Gibbie.
Speaker 2: Oh, sir, I too, give it the nicotine. How you feeling?
Speaker 4: Yeah, it was about six hours ago, so fair been terrible.
Speaker 1: Well, honestly they're gonna lie shit sitting here breathing air
like a fucking cave man.
Speaker 2: Was a Mark twainne say Quentin smoking qu Quitting smoking
is easy? I do it twenty times a day.
Speaker 1: Well, all right, okay, Mark Twain did it bad to me?
Speaker 4: All right?
Speaker 1: You've made me for okay, Mark Twain's bad to me? Thanks,
Gibby this time only this time.
Speaker 8: Sir, Wow, Michael, he's dead in your alife. Yeah take that,
Mark Twain, You're dead dead fuck. So that's what makes
me bad than ever. I'm alive, Mark Twain.
Speaker 6: Like for now, I get.
Speaker 2: You comment writing all right.
Speaker 1: By the time this episode goes out, fair enough.
Speaker 4: Mark Twain's gonna be waiting in the afterlife. Be like, motherfucker,
oh my god.
Speaker 2: Before we get into the game, I take a moment
of mind. Everyone listening. If you're not part of the
Andy family, you are, well, you're just wrong. You're just wrong,
and you need to fix it. So head over to
dot coms Authors and Dragon's Patreon check out our various tears.
For two dollars a month, you can join our discord
hang out with fans for a few books. A few
extra more bucks a month you get to hang out
like during these live games, and some people actually pay
them how they get free swag from us every couple
of months. Isn't that awesome? Speaking of swag, Header Authors
and Dragons dot dashera dot com or just go to
the website and click on the merchant link. Get out
some good gear, Get at that Hanzo shirt, the Hamburg
or Hindrance T shirt. I know I'm gonna buy one.
You have no bucks to cash? If usually have no cash,
a buck of toss away, we understand. Just go to
whatever's podcast, YouTube wherever it is you listen to us
or absorber material, hit like hit subscribe, leave comments, dot
shit helps way more than you can possibly understand.
Speaker 3: Haverduncery dot com, You and your duncery.
Speaker 2: All this is Conney stunts concience. How are you When
we last left the Dicey Bastards, Well, it was a theater.
I did not expect a theater episode. Every time a
show has a theater episodes, that's what I tie on
to tune out. Like when Buffet the Vampire, I can't
stand the musical. But yet here we are sneaking up
on up in the theater in the balcony's effort experient.
With some magic you figure out what they're gonna do.
The Dicey Bachelor's side would be great idea to sneak
onto the stage and try to become part of the stage,
become part of the show while they watch warfor it's
constable to try to accuse one Matt demon of killing
poor dead Bethany or deathany whatever we're calling.
Speaker 1: Personally, Connie, I quite like the musical episode of Buffet
the Vampire Slayer.
Speaker 2: No, it's like that's the star, that's the Star, Trek
exchange New Worlds, like let's bring it a song and dance.
Speaker 1: Everybody didn't watch that one. Didn't watch that one.
Speaker 2: It's all craps, Daniel, it's all crapped.
Speaker 4: Possibly move will remind you or that TV has not
been invented. But what a strange thing? Said that.
Speaker 1: I was just thinking to my conscients about some theater
experiences I've been watching and getting Buffet the Vampire Slayer.
Speaker 5: Doctor House episode is bullshit.
Speaker 2: I remember that episode.
Speaker 1: Yes, I remember looking for Doctor House's window and observe
observing his antiques, because yeah, I don't know what television is.
Man strange things a cop rock, No, why is everybody
saying things? Stop saying things. I'm trying to confer with
minor voice before this monster kills me.
Speaker 2: Speaking of monsters. After accusing that demon of wrongly accusing
excuse me, wrongly accusing that demon of being guilty of murder,
the real culprit Eric green Tree, the Elf moves Nemesis
showed up with his demon patron, and that together the
two calls way more havoc than they should have.
Speaker 1: Well, I don't think it was wrongly accused. That's the
wrong word, incorrectly accused. But as far as accusations go,
that was a doozyane.
Speaker 2: Let me ask you a question. We're just gilling the
lily here because you're afraid of fighting the theater gollum
that has appeared.
Speaker 1: Yes, I want to hold on to my fragile existence
for as long as possible.
Speaker 6: Thank you.
Speaker 2: I understand for those fans who watched last time. Yes,
the demon did cast a spell fusing this and all
the flesh of all these poor theaters are people into
one big fedora wearing fuck one theatrical monster up on
stage who's about a small down our poor stand and
and and then the and the jewelstra man that long
rest would have come in handy what and that is
where we're going to pick up over on. So if
you guys want to escalate this into a fight, I
will go ahead and hit the old turn order. See
if that's what you want to do, or you're going
to try some other things first, what do you want
to do?
Speaker 5: Well, we're up here now, aren't we I mean, do
we know this creature is hostile?
Speaker 4: Is it singing or anything?
Speaker 2: Well, you all these theater people came together, and it's like,
it's it's it's it's it's not pretty.
Speaker 4: I mean it looks kind of pretty.
Speaker 5: It's colorful.
Speaker 2: Here we go. There's there's the monster, there's the flesh monster.
Speaker 6: Right, but like it, it's a bunch of theater people.
So even if it's a monster, it should still be
singing its intentions and feeling.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: If it's not singing this intention it's snapping, it's preparing.
I'll okay, all right, Oh, I recognize that fingers snap.
We are in trouble girls.
Speaker 6: With the Capital Team. That a P and that stands
with oh fuck, pitch you seek.
Speaker 4: Do putting on the writs.
Speaker 7: Oh god, damn it.
Speaker 5: Here I was just about to seeing memories.
Speaker 1: Kebert gets a twenty bas the war colored Barbers. Oh no,
that's horrible, all right.
Speaker 5: Georgia rolled an eight, But none of my roles are
showing up here anyway.
Speaker 4: Rolled to five.
Speaker 1: Oh, not twenty for Stan or twenty six, And that's
why his net doesn't really count them.
Speaker 2: So I think I have to add you in manually
there Georcier custom babel.
Speaker 6: I thought I had a crossbow, but I do not.
It's been a while since season one. Gotta get back
on my ship.
Speaker 2: So what is it like before we get into the
any kind of combed anything you want to do? Is
anything guys want to do to prepare anything like that
about ahead of time? Because the theater goom's appearing, he's
kind of forming, he's kind of like doing like he's
doing that kind of like that that that movement thing
a lot of theater folks do to like their warm
up kind of exercises. They're like a lot of motion exercises.
Speaker 6: So is he playing zip zapp zop with himself.
Speaker 2: Red bet a yellow letter, red yellow.
Speaker 1: Leather, lion face, lemon face, lion face, doing a.
Speaker 2: Lot of motion things side aside looks kind of like
really like like like made up tai chiet to look
look like it's limbering up. You know, you don't you
can't trust the other people.
Speaker 1: So I don't know if you know many fear that
people jes through. But this is their equivalent of breaking
a bottle on a bi get ready for confrontation and
the one on the two and if I will cast
long Strider on myself.
Speaker 4: All right, go for it.
Speaker 1: But do I still have that cup that can be
anything I wanted to do?
Speaker 2: Yeah? Yeah, I mean if you brought it with you,
then it should be on your belt.
Speaker 1: So yeah, can I can it be like a really
good healing potion?
Speaker 2: No any any any beverage that is like you know
you It can't be like you know. Obviously you get
demon sweat out of it, but you can't get like
healing potions.
Speaker 1: So I'll just have a light band.
Speaker 4: All right, go for it.
Speaker 3: You know, Claudie has been listening to the audience and
trying to follow the stage and still is hurt, and
she's she'll be like, she's feeling really over stimulated.
Speaker 2: Have you got heal for six? Don't forget that?
Speaker 3: Yeah, And she'll say, uh, would you all shut up?
I can't concentrate, and she'll rage, Oh.
Speaker 2: Okay, cool, I love that. One second.
Speaker 7: Now we're really wishing that that Claudia was Drew's height exactly.
Speaker 2: Claudia doubles in size. Now you become the bear Claudia,
So you should have controlled that. I believe, yep, you
do use your own stats are like that. But that
is like the bear Claudia is now your toe. You
double in size as the bloody flace, the bloody face. Koala,
all right, stand it's your turn, sir.
Speaker 4: What would like to do? Well?
Speaker 1: If I know fearter people, their one cutting weakness should
be any kind of criticism at all.
Speaker 6: M m.
Speaker 1: So I'm gonna use which is mockery. Okay, there's not
going to be anything funny. I'm just going to give
them an honest assessment of their of their performance first start.
So I'm going to roll that. Not I have to
roll anything. I don't think it's one action, sixty feet instantaneous. Yeah, fourteen,
I will say, frankly, you're not coming off as very
believable and you're out of rhythm.
Speaker 2: What's the same against? Is it?
Speaker 1: Fourteen wisdoms?
Speaker 2: Wisdom?
Speaker 4: Save?
Speaker 6: Got it.
Speaker 2: Eleven?
Speaker 4: All right?
Speaker 1: Then he takes damage? All right, So psychic damage one
D four of psychic damage. I'm just going to roll
a D four. Here we go, fucking devastating criticism you're
not very good free and also disadvantage on the next
attack as they reel in outreach.
Speaker 2: Disadvantage of the next attack. It's like, oh, it's on
handers in the airs, Like I thought I would be better.
I thought I would be better.
Speaker 1: Okay, not impressed. I've seen better renditions of Warforge Constable.
I just thought it hadn't really aged that well. But
I think it's you, guys, I really do.
Speaker 2: They try to do the remake and it was like
the Black Suit and it just didn't work out.
Speaker 7: You know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I will say you are better than the remake,
but that's not a compliment. Not a compliment.
Speaker 6: That's damning the faint praise. If ever there was one
cow bear.
Speaker 2: The expedience er, you are up, What is it you
like to do? You have your friends, Your two friends
are down on the stage with a massive theater gallm
in front of them.
Speaker 6: Oh boy, that seems like a problem. They really got
themselves into what is the what is the curtain situation
around me?
Speaker 2: The curtain situation to find?
Speaker 6: Like, so most theaters are made with specialized like acoustic
fabric that's like very like there's like little portion partitions.
The walls behind you are very puffy, you know, okay,
very yeah, so they would be very very climbable for
ape hands. Say uh sure, sure, sure exactly, All right, Um,
there is very little I can do right now, but
I will go ahead and use a second level spell
to summon a beast.
Speaker 2: All right, what do you want to summon?
Speaker 6: Let's see, I guess I will go with an air
spirit since that seems like it'll be a little more
able to flick around, and I will summon it specifically
out here in the air.
Speaker 1: It really just occurred to me that KBA didn't join
in with the stage infiltration thing because of his lack
of disguise. But do you guys have pantomime horses in America?
I feel that would have been an easy win. But
as I need just to get to me.
Speaker 2: I'm just gonna drive you this one little air spirit
I made an air elemental. I'm gonna give you control over.
Speaker 6: It sounds good, and I believe they move. He moves
after me. I'm gonna summon him here yep, and then
he will do a ooop fly by attack uh to
hit the theater goal. And I'm just trying to find
where the attack is equal to half this spells level
round it down. And I used a second so still one? Okay?
Speaker 4: Cool?
Speaker 6: Or I used a third so still one? All right?
Attack your spell attack modifier okay, so we just roll
this like a wisdom with proficiency. I'm just gonna roll
it like a wisdom saving throw because that has my
proficiency added in.
Speaker 4: You should.
Speaker 6: Uh, that can't be right. There's not an option to
roll a zero.
Speaker 2: Well unless you rull a natural one plus seven equals eight.
Speaker 6: Yeah, that would that would make sense. Just why is
it showing zero?
Speaker 2: So I see plus zero because you have Okay there, yeah,
that is that not the roll?
Speaker 6: I guess maybe not. Okay, here, I'm going to roll
another one just to see what it looks like. Sure,
there we go.
Speaker 1: Oh man, that was a little better.
Speaker 2: That would have been.
Speaker 6: That would been a lot better. Okay, so the one
is in there. I just don't know where that weird
plus zero is coming from anyway. Yes, I got a natural.
Speaker 2: Wal there's no extra bonuses to the damage, is what
it's saying. It looks like whatever reason. I don't know
why I came home. Yeah I don't.
Speaker 4: I don't know.
Speaker 6: The red thing just tripped me off really bad. Yes,
I got a natural one. So my air spirit does
jackfuck all?
Speaker 2: Okay, do me a favor. I'm a roll fifty chance
die here real quick, alright, seventeen. Okay, So as the
air spirit goes by and it critically fails, jorceer, you
your robes go up in front of your face like
Marilyn Rose style. Your cat's suit is now upping your eyes,
blinding you for half a turn.
Speaker 1: Is there any children in the audience? You should not
have been taking your children to see wolf watch Constable anyway,
you irrespond here he.
Speaker 2: Took his wang out earlier.
Speaker 7: So yeah.
Speaker 2: Next up is Claudia. Claudia, why do a minus five
to strength?
Speaker 3: Sorry? Having weird things with spine?
Speaker 1: No children deserved this, jeezus.
Speaker 2: Okay, Claudia, it is your turn.
Speaker 6: All right?
Speaker 3: In Kohala form?
Speaker 5: Can she.
Speaker 3: Jump down from the balcony?
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, I mean it's your shoot. You're twice aside,
so it's like it's easier for you to do. So
give me an athletics ruld to get down.
Speaker 7: O ky.
Speaker 3: Twelve is fine, Okay.
Speaker 2: You get down to hear and then how much movement
do you have left? What's your total movement? Thirty so
that's five to ten. You have twenty feet left, so
five ten, fifteen, twenty. I'm gonna be honest with you,
just to be just to let you know, if you
don't attack or get attacked by something, you lose your
rage and you'll switch back to Claudia form. So you
pop it up there very early. So if you don't
want to lose this rage, and if you have to
one or half it might have to rage again. Otherwise
you have to punch one of these audience members.
Speaker 3: She will punch one of the audience members.
Speaker 2: Okay, would you like to punch the halfling, the halfling's
daughter or the merchant?
Speaker 3: Merchant?
Speaker 1: How tiny is the halfling's door?
Speaker 2: It's well, yeah, she's like, well, she's like sixteen, but
she's a sixteen year old halfing, so she's old enough
to see war force constable. But you know, she looks
very small. But you just gonna punch the merchant.
Speaker 3: Does she wait, does she look angry?
Speaker 6: Who does that?
Speaker 2: Backs or two? You really can't tell.
Speaker 3: Okay, no, mine, she'll punch the merchant.
Speaker 2: Okay, punch the merchants. Give me a tack rollo.
Speaker 1: Popca and get your popka.
Speaker 2: Unarmed strike thirteen. Yeah, you crack this merchant over the
back of the cigar. And because there's because they're rando
is because so you basically knock him bloody unconscious.
Speaker 6: I mean he was in her way. That sounds a
lot like a like a personal choice.
Speaker 3: You're in a theater with a fight going on, and
you're not running or ducking.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so you you ran up and you clocked this
guy in the back of the skull. To keep your
rage going, I'm gonna let you move up just a
little bit more.
Speaker 3: She wants to scream and bang her chest while she's
if she's allowed to, you want.
Speaker 2: To go so the under the bloody face skull face
Kuala wants to King Kong this thing. Yeah, exactly, I
give you a performance roll. I'm just curious.
Speaker 7: Two.
Speaker 3: Yeah, it's it's basically like like me Emily doing that.
Speaker 2: Actually you go to you do it, but you actually
hit yourself in your Nippley're like, oh damn it. Shit,
that hurts right in the titty. So yeah, it comes
off a week So Jorcer. You are upstair, you have
your robes up in your face. You push them down
and you're gonna lose half your movement to like readjust yourself. Shucks,
You've got a very very very large theater gollum right behind.
Speaker 4: You, all right.
Speaker 5: Well, in the spirit of the stage. George would like
to tell a joke. Okay, I'm going to use Tasha's
hideous laughter. Okay, well it's not I don't have to
roll anything, and they have to make a saving throw.
So I said, what's the saving what's the deal with
the airplane?
Speaker 4: Food?
Speaker 6: What? What?
Speaker 4: What's that?
Speaker 2: What's that? And I rolling against wisdom got it negative one?
So for a total of one excellent. So what happened?
So it starts laughing, right.
Speaker 5: Starts laughing, falls over and is incapacitated and unable to
stand up for the duration it's concentration up to a minute.
Speaker 2: Oh wow, So I got to beat this thing.
Speaker 4: So it's falling. It's prone.
Speaker 2: Okay, but so which way does it fall? North, southeast
or west? Because it could potentially fall on Stan. So
there's a twenty five percent chance of falling on Stan
and twenty percent chance of falling on Georcerer. So let's
see what happens here. See twenty five, twenty five to
fifty Jorisperer, fifty to seventy five Stan. Ye, some tippens here,
Oh he misses all of you.
Speaker 6: Falls this way.
Speaker 4: The entire theater just goes quiet.
Speaker 1: And somebody whispers, what's an airplane?
Speaker 2: So basically every round I have to make, I have
to save against your thing.
Speaker 5: Right at the end of each of its turns, yes, yep, okay,
and oh and each time it takes damage, you can
make another saving throw.
Speaker 4: Okay, got it.
Speaker 2: Well it is my turn now. Well, no, Mug, you
probably have a higher dexterity in this, and so you
can go before the theater goal.
Speaker 7: So Moog, you're up there, all right. Well, first I'm
going to we might want to put Karen on here.
Speaker 2: Oh, your closet.
Speaker 5: Oh, I am going to use my half movement, by
the way, and get behind okay, Stan.
Speaker 4: Got it.
Speaker 2: Okay, you're silly, littles Quog with Karen's right behind you, dude.
Speaker 7: All right, So Karen will turn into an invisible bat
and then fly forty feet this way.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 4: Moog, on the other hand, we will be like Moog
not understand modern theater.
Speaker 2: When Moog was.
Speaker 7: Child, we had traditional, traditional, family friendly entertainment. We would
gather tribe, we would bring out captured elves and we'd
force them to sing for us, and then we would
vote on winner and winner would get to eat losers.
What I have to do with this move not move.
I have no idea, but Moke is going to come
up here and and say tradition, you ready boots and
catapult sixty feet into a drop kick on this guy.
Speaker 2: Nice, click your heels the guy, you're ready boots. You
hit a prone thing, so you should have an advantage
on that attack role too, because it's you're in an
elevated position any an attack thing.
Speaker 4: So yeah, go for it.
Speaker 7: Twenty one twenty one hits and damage is five damage.
Speaker 2: Okay, five damage. This thing is easy to hit and
I was just made of hit points. So it's just
it's just a big, big goal.
Speaker 4: Do better entertaining Mook.
Speaker 2: Oh by the way, George Er, what what's your spell SAVDC?
Speaker 4: Where would I find that?
Speaker 2: It's on your D and D beyond sheet. It's it'll
be on the right side where says spell where sus
your your spells. It'll be like your spell spell SAFDC. Alright,
fifteen Okay, so I got I gotta beat a fifteen
all so if.
Speaker 5: He if you're making a saving throw versus because it
took damage, it gets an advantage.
Speaker 2: Okay, then I roll it again. Jesus, that's a lot
that's a that's two natural ones here, that's a yeah, whoa,
I roll thirteen in a one Okay, so so on
now it's it's that was taking damage. Great Now it's
it's turn. It's can't do anything. Besides, it's still laughing
about what what is the deal about? Airplane food ship?
So okay, I guess I got it, and end of
its turn is over. I get to roll again as
even survives, So yeah, I uh I that fuck? Okay,
he's still down this theater golum is useless. Okay, your
top of the order stand. You have a big laughing
monster in front of you.
Speaker 5: Also, I want to point out because it's prone, attack
roles have advantage on it. Yes, okay, uh.
Speaker 2: Oh, before you guys, stay before your turn. The rest
of the totally innocent party, you're like, hey, you guys
got this. Clearly the Eric kid and the demon are
doing some of the things around the whimsy, so we're
gonn find out what it's doing is we can stop it.
Speaker 4: So you guys got this.
Speaker 2: We'll see you later. Good luck, team. We believe in you,
and the rest of the tolls have already take off.
Speaker 3: Are we sure they're not villains.
Speaker 6: They're villains.
Speaker 1: Yeah, you guys, go and tackle the avid demon. We'll
lock down the situation here, because that was my idea. Goodbye,
all right, So Stan, you gott a.
Speaker 2: You got a giant, laughing monster with theater garb in
uh pretentiousness.
Speaker 6: What do I do?
Speaker 1: I don't know. It seems cruel to murder him on
stage when he's perfectly capable of him. Send Caesar, Okay,
I come not to pray Caesar, but to bury it
as fucker stabby, stabby? How long is he going to
be in capacitated anything here?
Speaker 2: It's I can't I have to beat his that's god
damn hideous laugher. He's reading it right like I've got
to beat his bells DC for ten rounds or so.
It's but I have a negative one to my wisdom,
so it sucks.
Speaker 1: Okay, well we'll just kind of stop this guy to that.
Speaker 6: It seems like the move. Yeah, what are we above?
Speaker 1: That will brandish?
Speaker 4: There's no point in be cast to the spell?
Speaker 6: Yeah, thicked a weird time to grow morals in this party. Man.
Speaker 1: These were just some background extras, probably not very well
paid exactly.
Speaker 6: They were just extra.
Speaker 3: I'm just trying to get my side.
Speaker 5: Card man.
Speaker 6: Listen, it's not like we're killing somebody high on the
call sheet. It's ensemble, all right, this is what they
signed up for.
Speaker 2: Actress to beginning. They don't have souls. Vehan like strippers,
they don't have souls. It's okay.
Speaker 4: Either.
Speaker 2: All marine biologists got it, you know, truly.
Speaker 1: So Stan will take out his dagger, say his day,
said dag, I said before me, and then he'll get
his raiding glasses out, yes, and step him.
Speaker 2: It's like you never gonna use your rad You're just
your dagger. Oh wow, twenty one definitely hits.
Speaker 1: It's more theatrical.
Speaker 5: You have advantage, So go for the crit.
Speaker 2: Over the crit you can roll it again if you want.
Speaker 1: Uh sure, why not? He's helpless after uh dagger you do?
Oh no, that's not It's good all right.
Speaker 2: So click to twenty one. Is too much damage you're
doing to this thing?
Speaker 1: Six?
Speaker 2: Okay?
Speaker 1: Maximum damage for a dagger. I don't know why.
Speaker 2: I'm proud of myself, all right, So he took damage correctors.
Right now I get to roll with the advantage to
try to see if I can overcome this eighteen with
Stan's quip about this is a dagger before you see,
like he goes it is and the de and the
uh it stands back up?
Speaker 6: Oh you killed the joke.
Speaker 2: It was it was a docudeseu.
Speaker 1: Well you just you can't do anything right, can you?
You're really fucking this mate?
Speaker 2: All right, Covert, it's your turn, sir.
Speaker 1: He gave you a wonderful opportunity for a death monologue
there and you fucked it up.
Speaker 6: Oh wait, is it my turn?
Speaker 2: Yes, sir?
Speaker 6: Oh sorry, I thought were still in the stand.
Speaker 4: All right?
Speaker 6: How high up did you say?
Speaker 2: These balconies are fifteen about twenty feet?
Speaker 4: Oh?
Speaker 6: Perfect. Then I will go to the edge and Misty
step down, okay, uh, And then I will position myself
so that I have cover behind one of these pews.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 6: Doesn't look like anybody really needs healing that I can
reach or want to heal.
Speaker 2: Well, there's a merchant who's knocked out and bleeding from
the ear.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I said, or want to heal.
Speaker 4: I covered that.
Speaker 2: I don't know where you stand on capitalism, that's also I.
Speaker 6: Mean, look, Kabert is a man of necessities, but right
now the necessity is his his His idiot charges living
so all right, Air Elemental, let's knock this motherfucker back
to Avenue. Q. That was a musical reference, sir, It's
not that I like.
Speaker 2: And also I wish I cared.
Speaker 6: That was for the for the audience as much as
you guys.
Speaker 1: They are about free people listening to it. So having
a fantastic time right now.
Speaker 6: Absolutely, and I'm one of them. All right, air fly
by attack again, natural twenty hoofda.
Speaker 2: All right, so ten damage.
Speaker 6: Ten and then I'm not sure what the crit for
this guy is. I guess we just rolled the dice again, so.
Speaker 4: D eight plus.
Speaker 2: So yeah, you just roll it again, so D eight.
Speaker 6: Three, so thirteen damage from the air Elemental.
Speaker 2: Got it. You slash into it and like you know,
blood pours out, and then the creature rore is back
in pain. You're like, oh, and uh, you know, as
you know, as you uh slash at it as something
to like to find your voice, she must first lose
your fear of being wrong.
Speaker 6: Yeah, tell it to dell close, asshole. I'm just leaning in.
I'm making this as inside as I fucking.
Speaker 2: Can, No, Drew, I had to look up theater quotes
today and I felt thirty doing it so piss off.
So you're if I'm doing you leaning into it. So
all right, Claudia the murderous Kowala king kong Guala, let's do.
Speaker 3: This, all right, she's gonna run up on stage.
Speaker 2: Wait a second, where were you?
Speaker 6: Go?
Speaker 2: Back to where you were? Real fast?
Speaker 6: Okay?
Speaker 2: Okay, five ten fifteen twenty twenty five. Thirty you can
get to right about here. Okay, that's your that's your speed, right, yeah?
Speaker 3: Thirty?
Speaker 4: Wait, each thing is five feet? How was that? Thirty?
Speaker 5: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Because taking the edge of where that she was at,
So five ten fifteen twenty twenty five, uh, thirty, because
it's like every time you do a diagonal, because of
the every other diagonal is ten feet.
Speaker 5: Wait a second, what squares are you looking at?
Speaker 2: I'm pit just picking one because unfortunately so measurer Well
you're not Okay, that thing isn't really that accurate because again,
if you actually it's a triangle, it's like a triangle theory,
like every other every other square is ten feet. But
you know what, fuck it? That's fine, but can you
get can you get to him with using that thing?
Because I the traditional way you cannot. Fine, you can
get to him this fucking thing.
Speaker 3: We bullied him.
Speaker 2: I was gonna make a punch door, sir.
Speaker 3: So well, I would have done something worse. Oh my
now god, okay, all right, she'll attack. What does she
got she's got two on arm strikes?
Speaker 6: Okay?
Speaker 2: Do you get plus because of the quala claus didn't
I did I tell you something like that?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 3: You didn't actually tell me what it was?
Speaker 2: Oh okay, but yes, oh baby, it's I think it's
like because you get there's also rage bonuses and the
things for your attacks, because it's like when you're in
a rage, you should be getting bonuses just for like
your strength bonuses and rage bonuses for attacks and damage.
We gonna have to look into that, just you know,
just just add for right now, just add plus two
to every attack, just so what are the damage wise
for the moment? Once we come back to it. So
the first attack hits, so we'll say that called that four?
What's the next one?
Speaker 6: Okay?
Speaker 2: Another four? So eight damage?
Speaker 3: Okay, you're right, okay, all right.
Speaker 2: Uh cool, Georser, your turn, sir.
Speaker 5: All right, I would like to disorient this creature, okay
with my wonder oka and a mind sliver spell.
Speaker 2: Oh okay.
Speaker 5: So, yes, I shall present my wonder and say, behold
my wonder. Okay, and he has to make an intelligence
save okay eighteen. Oh, I guess that'll do all right.
You can cease to beholding my wonder. I'm gonna back up.
Speaker 1: Fair enough, thank you, and good night.
Speaker 2: Uh Moog from behind you, Georgery flashes ding dong and
the like, and then this thing quickly rowed back up
and moved away. Also have a giant bloody quality here, right,
So there's other things. There are many things for you
to fight at the moment.
Speaker 7: Mook is making it making a point not to pay
attention to Georgeer. So Karen's gonna fly the rest of
the way in okay, de.
Speaker 4: Cloak and use her scarability.
Speaker 7: Do you like?
Speaker 4: Okay?
Speaker 6: Boo el fucker?
Speaker 4: Okay, So he needs to succeed on a DC ten
wisdom save.
Speaker 2: This gollum is immune to fear. It's a theater creature.
Nothing scares it.
Speaker 6: Well that sucks, oh except reviews.
Speaker 2: Exactly. It could be hurt emotionally, but it's not afraid
of anything.
Speaker 6: It has an ego that will all recover.
Speaker 7: Oh, then it's Moog's turn. You follow elves. The rest
is silence, and he will cast booming blade first of all. Okay,
thunder damage seven and we'll use orphans splitter. That's that's
a seven. That's a miss.
Speaker 2: That that's actually a miss. It's got a low ac
but not that.
Speaker 4: That's okay.
Speaker 7: I will use my action surge to tray again. Got it?
Speaker 4: Jesus fucking Christ.
Speaker 2: As Moog swings orphan splitter left and then right, flashbacks
of the Hodgepodge dodge and his inability this war than himself.
Should he embrace the Elvin heritage to give him a
better footing and attack abilities? Or should he reject it?
Because every time you think about being enough, you fail.
So the Hodgepog is acted back to haunt you. Back
to back. Seven's you miss a twenty five foot tall
creature somehow twice?
Speaker 6: Moog.
Speaker 1: I know we're on stage, but this isn't actually a
fake fight.
Speaker 4: We are.
Speaker 1: We are stabbing this guy for real stage fright.
Speaker 2: You're you're aiming for like the sword and not the person.
All right, it is now the theater at Golm's turn.
First off, the first first attack is going to the
person that stabbed him with a knife. And asked him
the question. So the first attack is coming for he
picks He reaches down, smashes the ground and picks up
planks from the board and using it as a club.
The first attack is coming at Stan Dandy Liver.
Speaker 1: This is because I criticized it, isn't it twelve missus?
Speaker 2: It's a miss all right? Second attack at Stan Dandy Liver.
Speaker 1: You are quite literally chewing up the scenery right now.
Speaker 2: All right, nineteen hits you?
Speaker 1: Nineteen does it?
Speaker 6: Yeah?
Speaker 2: All right, so it hits you. And I'm going to
add an additional this is Stan, give me a strength,
give me an either acrobatics or athletics role. I want
to see how I want to see how you do here?
Speaker 1: Wow seven for acrobatic.
Speaker 2: You get thrown, you got pushed back across the stage,
s slide here and you start to stumble slightly up.
It's it's you hit so hard, it's so big. You
get slam and shoved back and you skid up there
next to Jorser and you are prone at the moment.
Speaker 1: Hellow Jolsy Hello.
Speaker 2: A third attack coming in and let's go from moog
So nineteen for twenty one damage on top of.
Speaker 6: Moog that I will shield that.
Speaker 2: Got it?
Speaker 4: Okay? All right?
Speaker 1: How much damage there I get from that plank?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 2: The plan plank damage you took sixteen sixteen?
Speaker 4: Cool?
Speaker 6: All right?
Speaker 1: I mean it's not cool very much. It's that's just terrible.
Speaker 2: Yeah, And as it as it hits you, it's like
the roll of the autist is to ask questions, not
to answer them. Whack and smash you across the thing.
Speaker 1: I would like an answer.
Speaker 2: All right, that's end of his turn. Standards, You now
your turn.
Speaker 1: Well, I'll stand up, jose give me a hand here
with you donning who.
Speaker 4: You offer?
Speaker 2: This peanis your hand?
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's not what I mean.
Speaker 4: I mean they're both extended. All right.
Speaker 1: Time for more rot less matter. I'm gonna draw my
vap here and if I still have an action, I'd
like to move in and take a stab in.
Speaker 2: Uh, it's half a moment to stand back up. So
we have like fifteen feet, so you have three squares
to go.
Speaker 1: Well, in that case, I will move free squares forward.
I will prepare myself with a flourish and they'll wait
to the audience.
Speaker 2: The audience, by the way, is like scared put in
trance at the same time.
Speaker 4: This is so much better than the play they came
to watch.
Speaker 2: All right, that is your roove, Colbert, it's your turn, sir.
Speaker 6: Where's the measuring thing?
Speaker 2: All right, there we go, measuring tool of yours.
Speaker 6: Okay, yeah, that's good. And oh I forgot I have
long strider perfect all right. I believe I can run
up to here and that will get me close enough
to yep, launch a thorn whip at this mofo.
Speaker 2: Okay, you're gonna try to pull it towards you. No, no,
very much, not okay, I'm just checking.
Speaker 6: Yeah, just just hitting him with a magic whip of vines,
okay for fourteen?
Speaker 2: Oh, fourteen does hit?
Speaker 4: All right?
Speaker 6: Seven damage?
Speaker 2: All right, that's I like that.
Speaker 6: And then my uh my air elemental will attempt to
wet himself with blood. Okay, hope y'all appreciate this. You
fucking fill a theater nerve. All right, eleven, I'm guessing
my eleven doesn't hit just missus, yes, sir? Oh well,
all right, it did something that round.
Speaker 2: I will say this drew when you hit it this
time with your thorn whipping and the reels back and pain,
you know, and more of the theater, blood spills upon
the boards. There's a shift in the in the creature.
It you just notice that the mask, which was kind
of comedical, is now switching to tragical, and you're seeing
like it's almost like you play a video game where
you've now hitched the bosses, like a hit point threshold
where things are gonna get kind of fucking shitty for
you guys. So it's definitely there's an angry palpitation coming
off this creature.
Speaker 6: Now, all right, and how elevated?
Speaker 2: Is the stage about ten feet because it's like five
and five, so yeah, about ten feet above you.
Speaker 6: So all right, I'm just gonna I don't have movement left,
but I am gonna kind of duck down and tuck.
Speaker 4: In a little bit.
Speaker 2: Because of that. He's so tall. Yes, not a problem, Okay,
after you is Claudia. Claudia right there?
Speaker 3: Yeah, Kowaldia, we'd like to scoot around to the site.
Speaker 6: Is that the start?
Speaker 3: She can go for a little bit.
Speaker 2: More, she can go. Yeah, she can go around. I
mean you know, I mean you got thirty feet, so
do what you want to go?
Speaker 3: Right cool? She just wants to be on the other side.
And then she'll do two unarmed strikes.
Speaker 4: Got it.
Speaker 2: I actually do with advantage because you have a Karen.
The closet is giving you advantage.
Speaker 3: So yeah, okay.
Speaker 2: So there's the first first one looked at the eighteen,
so that's four damage, okay, and then the second one
nineteen nineteen, so eight other eight damage?
Speaker 4: Got it?
Speaker 2: All right? As you do that, one of the first
the creature's legendary reactions happens at the end of your turn.
It will then swing around with the boards and clock you,
try to attempt to clock you over the over the
head twelve misses, I assume, yes, okay, all right, Jorcer,
your turn, sir.
Speaker 4: All right.
Speaker 5: I am going to whisper stage directions at this creature, okay,
with a dissonant whisper.
Speaker 2: Okay.
Speaker 6: Uh.
Speaker 5: So it must make a wisdom saving throw.
Speaker 2: Okay, fifteen, all right, so my spell.
Speaker 4: Safety is fifteen. I mean, it's it passed.
Speaker 2: You meet it or beat it, so he saves. All right,
So I once again do nothing, little Curtsey and backup.
Speaker 5: Huh yeah, I'll back up a little bit. Actually go
this way so that I'm more directly behind Stan.
Speaker 2: All right, I'll use this my second I get the
point of variations, and I will after you'd go. He's
now going to use a piece of the board that
he's holding and throw it at you. Seeing that you
are a cast there and there's a thirteen hit you.
Speaker 1: Let me check, boy is the ac for the dead
CATSI aware?
Speaker 5: Yeah, I have an armor class of twelve, but I
would like to use my reaction to cast shield.
Speaker 2: Okay, well, so do you have an armber class at
twelve orre you like lower than that because you have
no armor because you're just wearing a cat's.
Speaker 4: See, I never have armor.
Speaker 6: Yeah, I assume that's just as decks.
Speaker 2: Okay, fair enough. So you want to use a shield,
so it pings off of that? Got it? So like
a hunk of the boards from the stage bounces off
of your shell? All rocket, All right, move, you're up.
Speaker 6: All right.
Speaker 7: Karen will fly to the other side, I think, given
me flank and she'll use her claw attack. Okay, twenty
two twenty hits for seven damage. Okay, God damn things,
do it more than me.
Speaker 2: This is how you hit boss.
Speaker 7: All right, moog, we'll use burning blade again, okay, two
thunder damage of course, and let's do some orphans split
fifteen fifteen actually hits for fifteen damage actually, so seventeen
damage in total.
Speaker 2: Oh wow, nice, good job. All right, at the end
of your turn, it's going to use its last legendary
action of this round, and it's going to you cast
theatrical presence. I would like everybody to make a charismas
saving throw DC seventeen.
Speaker 4: That's gonna be pad Uh what fuck?
Speaker 6: I got a three?
Speaker 4: All right? Georgia gets a twenty six.
Speaker 2: All right, Georgia, You're fine.
Speaker 4: Charismatic as fuck?
Speaker 1: Oh man, fullteen?
Speaker 2: The theater goal emits such an amazing presence that you
are basically it's you're stunned for basically one round.
Speaker 6: You are.
Speaker 2: He is so captivating, so commanding, and he just puts
off such an aura that you are. You can't help
and watch it. You are stunned for one round.
Speaker 4: I'm not impressed.
Speaker 2: So who all didn't make it? Claudia didn't okay, move
in his closet, did not okay?
Speaker 4: Stand?
Speaker 2: Did you make it?
Speaker 6: No?
Speaker 1: Fullteen?
Speaker 2: All right? So everybody, So everybody bud Georser, all right, so.
Speaker 1: Wow, I'll be done this, Sally, Yeah. Half the audience
might not have left.
Speaker 6: All right, So that's a theater performer.
Speaker 2: All right, all right, so we'll start on the top.
He only gets three hits.
Speaker 4: Let me see.
Speaker 2: Actually I know I get six hitch I think because
it's the end of the in the enturney.
Speaker 4: So we'll start.
Speaker 2: Okay, you'll start with your quoset. The golm is going
to swing in your cquoset. It's an automatic hit because
it's stunned. This should count as crit damage.
Speaker 4: So let's see.
Speaker 2: So your quasi oh fuck, well, your quadt just took
twenty five damage, totally destroyed.
Speaker 6: There's no longer a closet in that closet.
Speaker 2: Claudia is up next. It's an automatic hit.
Speaker 5: Eight should just have advantage.
Speaker 4: But what's that?
Speaker 5: So stunned? Just give us advantage?
Speaker 2: What it should be an automatic because you're stunt, you
can't get out.
Speaker 1: Of the way.
Speaker 5: Well, I mean, I'm just looking at the stunned condition.
Speaker 2: Oh okay, Well I'm not doing double damage right that.
This is just stray of damage. So Claudia you take
eighteen okay, and Moog sixteen damage to move so you
three are no longer stunt. So the top of the
round stan he comes around his turn, he is stunned.
At the end of his turn is unstunned. Same thing
with Cabert. Now it is Claudia's turn because she got
hit last round. So Claudia, you have an action.
Speaker 3: Do I need to scooch over a little bit more
to flank?
Speaker 2: You need to get over to where where the where
the Karen used to be.
Speaker 7: The year yep?
Speaker 3: Okay, and then we'll do two strikes. Okay, here's the
first one.
Speaker 2: Both miss okay, Oh no, that's the first. No, that's
the first strike. You have advantage on both, so okay.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 2: Basically roll four times and okay, you've got these two
more eighteen eighteen hits, so so that's another four damage. Moog,
you were hit, Jocepher you it is your turn because
you were never hurt before.
Speaker 5: All right, I'm gonna try this dissonant whispers again. Okay,
and that was a wisdom.
Speaker 2: Save oh wisdom saying sorry, that's me. I was gonna
something eight. So I'm gonna use one of my legendary
resist is to make the save bomber.
Speaker 5: Sorry, no, sorry, no, that's what that's what you do,
all right, burned door resistance good for me?
Speaker 4: I mean can you blame it? Actually, he doesn't want
to die on stage.
Speaker 2: All right, now it is a moog's turn.
Speaker 7: All right, Well, back to booming blade and the morphins
split her. All right, twenty.
Speaker 2: Twoeen h it's twenty two, right.
Speaker 7: All right? For thirteen damage?
Speaker 2: Oh thirteen, got it? Okay, okay, it's looking really really rough.
All right, okay, now it is it's turn. It's going
to step over here.
Speaker 7: Takes three more damage. Well actually, no, hold on, let me,
I actually have to roll that. It takes three more damage.
Speaker 2: Got it, Claudia, you got it. You got an attack
of opportunity coat that hits for four okay, cool, all right?
Uh Cobert, Uh, it's coming at you's going to take
a swipe and you can sweep. It's very tall. It's
going to swing down and hit you.
Speaker 4: You alright?
Speaker 6: Fifteen ac well you.
Speaker 2: Were yet end of the stunt. I gotta do the
actual attack one seconds sixteen.
Speaker 6: That'll do it.
Speaker 2: For seventeen damage of big old board plank over top
of your skull. And it says, first you must think,
second dream, third you believe, and finally you must dare
as it clocks you over the skull and uh, it's
in its first attack. Moog is right next me. He's
going to do a backhand swing against Moog. Twenty one
for twenty four damage.
Speaker 4: Shield it okay, And because of its height.
Speaker 2: Its last attack is coming down on Stan. You were
stunned before, correct, Yeah, but you're no longer stune so
this is a real attack.
Speaker 6: Uh.
Speaker 2: Twenty four for eighteen damage.
Speaker 1: Stand is down?
Speaker 4: Okay, taking that, old man.
Speaker 2: And top of the order is stand Stan. Could you
give me a death saving throw saving just a D
twenty Just get out of ten or better ten? Okay,
that's one success, so good.
Speaker 7: Uh.
Speaker 2: Next up, Cobert, you're up, sir, all right.
Speaker 6: Uh My action will be to disengage.
Speaker 1: Okay, out the brave candell out.
Speaker 6: Um and then perfect I will throw down healing word.
Speaker 4: Okay?
Speaker 2: Is that a bonus action?
Speaker 6: That is a bonus action?
Speaker 2: Cool you? What do you say to stand to heal him?
From a distance? Wake up you old far far far
far far far far, stand the melodic words of Cobert
the expedient echoing your ear, healing you for six damage.
You are no longer dying, You are conscious on your back,
and there's a giant monster aluming go over you and.
Speaker 6: Moogra also my my guy still acts independently, so yes,
he will zip in, zip out and try to swing about. Okay,
twenty four, So.
Speaker 2: Twenty four hits for seven damage. You will hit the creature.
The creature? Is this the end of them?
Speaker 6: It is?
Speaker 2: And it dies on scene very dramatically as it crumples
to the ground, falling into the different different parts. Now
the question is which direction does it fall? North south
east west.
Speaker 6: I am so glad you have disengaged north.
Speaker 2: South east west one two three four, So let's find
out north south east west north. Okay, it doesn't. I
really wanted to land on one of you people, but
like so this creature, let me see, uh you you
put you later off, put you in the gene layer
and then it turns back into all these people.
Speaker 4: It would have been great of Atlanta understand.
Speaker 2: Things that laying on standing and like all these like, uh, well,
it looks like there's a lot of very bloody actors
laying on the stage.
Speaker 4: Looks so creative. More murders to solve.
Speaker 6: Okay, so it's a Shakespeare ending.
Speaker 1: Whatever the curtain. Oh, nothing in his life became like
leaving it a cunt.
Speaker 4: Encore on core.
Speaker 2: We know we are out of combat, So what do
you always want to do?
Speaker 4: Take a bow?
Speaker 7: Yeah?
Speaker 2: The fans, okay, you know what, all of you together
give me a collective performance role, like, everybody give me
a performance roll. Let's see how well this comes across.
Speaker 6: I got a nine, which is better than I thought.
I got a fifteen.
Speaker 1: Well twelve, uh, you know, well twenty one actually.
Speaker 2: Despite you know the co Bear's initial thing, like you
guys come together, you know, put your hands on the stage,
you know, yeah, and you all take a bow there
and you know, the audience applause.
Speaker 4: They're into it.
Speaker 2: They like they was the show wasn't real. They're not sure,
but they are entranced by this.
Speaker 6: Give us hands, if we be friends, and yours sir
will restore them.
Speaker 1: Oh then will nudge Cabert and say a savage clamor well,
may I get a board? This is the chase I'm
gone forever. Exit pursued by I really hope you could
do an exit pursued by a horseman quick.
Speaker 2: The Halfling's daughter, like from the stage, calls out, why
are those people bleeding on stage behind you? And that's
when the this the curtains circle around the theater stage,
blocking off the nstance. And that is where we will
end this episode of the Dicey Bashers with one great
theater curtain call and at least five dying actors behind you.
Speaker 6: Well that's the theater. You go out and you die.
Speaker 1: Okay, do that thing where they applaud the people in
the will to strip it. But it is just a
pile of semi culture.
Speaker 6: We do like to hand gesture to the body.
Speaker 1: Really should have planned that being pursued by a bear exit.
It's the classic exit.
Speaker 2: Oh so yes, the stage, The stage closes around you.
Speaker 4: Guys.
Speaker 2: You have a few months, a few minus. We have
to sign off. Is the anything you guys want to do?
A plot wise? Where you where you know you want
to go? You know that there's a demon and uh
Eric or loosimmer loosely on the ship, as are the
totally innocent party.
Speaker 6: I guess in all fairness, Coubert will go see if
those bodies are alive and in need of healing, by
which I mean a good berry shoved down their throat,
or fully dead.
Speaker 2: They are you, you fuck them up? They were They
were forced together by magic and they are dying quickly.
So it's like, yes, depending how many rounds you took
to get there, we'll find out.
Speaker 6: So I will I will cast you get ten good
berries per spell, so I will summon around and start
jamming them down throats.
Speaker 2: I will say this, so I'll give you a round
for your curtain claw. I'll do some rolls, like we'll
find out the next ti because basically, you did your
curtain call, you checked on, you cast a good berry.
That's an action. So basically some of them may have
a shot. We'll find out what happens. We'll see you
have five people to save.
Speaker 6: We've got ten good berries and a lot of hands.
Speaker 2: So what I'm saying is you might have like you
might have several failures over the last three rounds, so
we might have DoD people to begin with. We'll find
out on the next game though. But is there anything
else you all want to you want to do?
Speaker 5: I want to run backstage and try and swipe some costumes.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, it's your back stage now, Like there are
there are like a lot of people like perplexed looking
stage hands, oh shit, or any of the elves. Twenty
percent chance that there's an elf. So let's do a
twenty or below twenty five.
Speaker 4: No Elves's time, so no extra curtain calls.
Speaker 2: Oh well, yeah, now there was you know what, do
me a favorite move, give me a history check. Ten,
it's average, you do. There wasn't Elves sitting on the
front road. There was an elven, like because I have
them labeled. There's an Elf trewe sitting on the front row.
And there's also an elf archer on the front road too,
So there's two Elves in the front row.
Speaker 7: But like you know that they're outside the curtain, and
you really don't like you don't you don't break the
fourth wall.
Speaker 2: You don't, okay, just honestly where your level of the
commitment is? Uh, anybody else they want to do?
Speaker 3: Claudia is gonna be sitting there out of her rage,
eating her little mint. She'll say, same time tomorrow.
Speaker 1: Oh there's no business like show business, which is probably
a good thing.
Speaker 6: All right.
Speaker 2: So, uh, that is where we're gonna end this episode
of the dicey Bassards on this closed curtain, bloody performers,
a good combat, recessions, and more things to go on
on the grand Whimsy because there's danger of foots and
this is think this is only the first day of
the sea vessel voyage, all right, so on behalf of
Robert Bevan, and Rick Walterry, Drew Hayes, Emily Kapla and
Steve Whether or I'm m kay Gibson. We've been the
dicey bassard saying you've been great, Thank you all, I
see you all the next time.
Speaker 4: By everybody, bye bye.
Speaker 1: You've been listening to dicey bastards cats see if Wolfs
and Dragons check us out at wolfhas and Dragons dot com.
Speaker 4: Look up our.
Speaker 1: Patreon if you want to supporters, get secret content, and
hang out on our discord music by the Doorcore Fall.
You should not have been taking your children to see
Warfort Constable anyway, you irresponsible folks.