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Speaker 1: Thank you for listening to Softcore History. The best way

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to support this podcast is by going to patreon dot

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dollars a month, you will get eight extra episodes a month,

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plus a three year evergreen back catalog of content, history stuff,

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If you can't support us that way, please like and

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leave a review on Apple and Spotify and subscribe to

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our YouTube channel YouTube dot com slash Softcore History Today.

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Speaker 2: On Softcore History, we finally talk about King Baldwin.

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Speaker 1: Four, in other words, the cool guy in the metal

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mask from Kingdom of Heaven, the Ridley Scott two thousand

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and five classic.

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Speaker 2: And sure that might have been a Ridley Scott creative

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decision to include the mask, but we're gonna pretend it

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happened anyway.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you told me he didn't wear the mask, and

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I'm still mentally picturing him in the middle Mass the

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entire time.

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Speaker 2: Welcome to Softcore History. Welcome back to the Softcore History.

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I'm your host for the week. Damn Or Jester joined

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as always by Rob Fox.

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Speaker 1: What's going on? And that is it don't have a

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deep bench.

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Speaker 2: I don't want it. Not this week we're talking off

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air very minimally, we didn't.

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Speaker 1: It was very much or almost like Oasis at this point.

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The Gallagher brothers like, or.

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Speaker 2: Just get over enough studge with me and we'll play

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a fucking soul in the spot. Fucking I y I

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want to get paid per word with you? Oh you

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want to?

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Speaker 1: Charles dickens it mm hmm yeah, which is.

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Speaker 2: So anything we say I need to recorded and it

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needs to be monetized. So I'm sorry.

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Speaker 1: Always the cut of the money we make based on

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who speaks more.

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Speaker 2: No, oh okay, I just there's no point to have

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a conversation with you if for not o it's nothing personal.

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It's not like I don't like you, but like, why

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talk to you if we can't record?

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Speaker 1: I have to do it so much on Mike, Why

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do it off Mike?

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Speaker 2: It's like like what a because you're like, oh, hey,

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how's the rent fair? How about we talk about it

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on the show.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, you didn't respond to me at all. I

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was like, how was the rent fair? You could have

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been like sweet, let's talk about on the show. You're

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just like, hold on, hold on, dude, hold on, and

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then you didn't say anything for like eight minutes.

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Speaker 2: Let's get down the business. How was the rent fair?

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I guess past us out on air? You were like, Hey,

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should we get so and so to be on the show.

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We have a couple of guests I could get. I'm like, no,

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let's do a two man show. I got too much

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to talk about because you know how many pages I wrote.

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You said you eked out five pages for your Patroon

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episode today.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, well, which is the opposite of what I did

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for the Patreon episode last week, which was like eight

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or nine pages of notes. I got twelve pages. Good lord.

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Speaker 2: We started earlier night because I wanted to go to

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bed early. But I guess here, we fucking know. You're like, oh,

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I finally get to go to bed before midnight. I'm like,

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hold on, sair, not so fast. We're going three hours.

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Speaker 1: Well, I'll keep the gap into a minut. Let's just

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just get into this fucking thing.

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Speaker 2: Ah, dude. The Renfrare was awesome. Man, it was a

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great time. Huh had a blast. I showered, I did mushrooms.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, what you did shower when I got home. Oh,

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but I was a filthy little I think you should have.

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I wouldn't bear it. I think you should have gone

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to like a bathhouse at the ren fair. Did they

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have any of those?

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Speaker 2: They had showers so you could pay for it. That's stupid.

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I don't want to take a modern shower. I want

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to be bathed for the campground. So the campgrounds, it

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was kind of like anything goes right, you just show up.

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There was no rules, regulations, people were I think there were.

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I realized this when we were at the bonfire at

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three am. There might just be homeless people there.

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Speaker 1: There almost certainly had to be.

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Speaker 2: There might just be people that bounce festival festival because

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you pay twenty five bucks to get in just the

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camp but you're good, like you. No one's like enforcing

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for you to leave, right, You could say there for

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four months if you want to, what for twenty five

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the ren fairs four months? Huh.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, there's homeless people there.

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Speaker 2: I mean, not like not inside the festival, but the campgrounds,

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yeah side of it.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, oh yeah, that's a great racket.

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Speaker 2: Why wouldn't you just get a tent post up for

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four months? Twenty five bucks.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, you were probably mostly surrounded by hoboes.

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Speaker 2: I realized that when we went to the giant fire

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in the middle of the campgrounds, where everybody in costume

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started to dwindle away, and it almost appeared as if

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it was the gathering of the Juggalos.

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Speaker 1: What does that mean? I mean, I can visualize that,

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But what did you see? What are the things you

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saw at this renaissance fair?

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Speaker 2: The main star of this bonfire on this particular night,

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and it was a magical night because I was doing

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magic mushrooms, I was following Scott Lopez, who was on

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the show last week, was dressed as a wizard. I

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made everything infinitely better because I just kept saying, follow

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the wizard, doesn't matter if we get lost for the wizard.

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Towards the end of the night, it went from you know,

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relatively attractive people in costume to this middle aged man,

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bald go tee, probably thirty percent body fat, had a

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bottle of Henny in his hand, okay, and just kind

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of started doing like his own little his own little

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dance okay, and he was scaring the hose.

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Speaker 1: That sounds hope, Well, I was gonna say, yeah, that

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sounds scared of the hose.

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Speaker 2: But here's the thing.

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Speaker 1: Based on the setting, I don't know what would scare

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the hose that go to that.

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Speaker 2: It looked like we were under thirty five. Dude.

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Speaker 1: There's just a place to like get fucked up for

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four months, right Yeah, yeah, like you and there's showers.

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Speaker 2: There's really no police. The police are there and they're

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just like whatever. You've kind of moved along. Yeah. People

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were like giving hand jobs in front of the cops.

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They said nothing.

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Speaker 1: What Yeah, really buried that lead. I mean it was

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getting jerked off in front of a cop.

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Speaker 2: I mean someone just kind of went fully nude. Dude

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went dong out at the campfire and hopped the fire.

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Speaker 1: Oh and it was a it was a big beast.

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Speaker 2: It almost dangled into the flame. Oh he was, he was.

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He was hanging don He was hanging Donu. I mean, yeah,

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you don't do it if you're not. I told Boosh too,

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I said you should hang nub. Yeah, like have the

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confidence to throw that little acorn out.

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Speaker 1: Because it's not about how big it is, it's about

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how confident you are in it.

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Speaker 2: They had naked Jenga there. Naked Jenga naked Jenga. There

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was a don't feel like that effects the game.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, there's a bunch of naked stuff, okay, other are

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swinger tads and stuff like that.

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Speaker 2: It's never the ones that you want, I imagine with

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puns like naughty ham not oh nice like that.

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Speaker 1: So it's just like a bunch of uhgoes drilling each

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other in the forest.

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Speaker 2: You know which.

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Speaker 1: By the wait, there are a lot of.

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Speaker 2: Like ugly people there with just the most confidence I've ever.

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Speaker 1: Seen because they're in their element.

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Speaker 2: It is it is their element there. Yeah, a lot

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of people steal validor though and don't really understand what

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the Renaissance is.

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Speaker 1: I'll tell you this much. It sounds like you can't.

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Speaker 2: Dress up as a Roman or a Spartan's asenide for

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a medieval fair. Do you know what I think?

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Speaker 1: Just hearing everything you said, what I think the most

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accurate part of the Renaissance fair was historically.

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Speaker 2: The smell.

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Speaker 1: Oh I smelled like Donkey Dick. Yeah, I feel like

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everyone smelled historically accurate.

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Speaker 2: I ate nothing but meat on sticks. Well, obviously drank

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a bunch of booze, did a bunch of drugs, didn't

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ship for two days. Finally got the poop today. He

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pooped for two days just out of like, No, I

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just couldn't, Okay, didn't. Did you drink it all require

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me to? Yeah? I drank a lot and shit and

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usually mushrooms make me shit. It's weird. Today there was

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just a fucking meat missile that came out. Yeah it hurt. Yeah,

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I was struggling. Maybe it felt good.

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Speaker 1: That said, though, I had high five in the prostate

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all the way.

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Speaker 2: It's a great time. I would recommend it. Okay. It's

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probably one of the better run fairs I ever have

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been to have a limit in it, too, So it's

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the better one. Top two, yeah, top one.

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Speaker 1: Top one, yea, the best one.

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Speaker 2: Today's subject we're actually going to talk about, you know,

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a medieval king.

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Speaker 1: You usually, uh, whatever you've recently done bleeds into your subject.

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Speaker 2: I feel like sometimes I've also talked about this man,

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I think for like four straight episodes.

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Speaker 1: So I figured I'd just do the episode.

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Speaker 2: Okay.

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Speaker 1: I just assume, like you're going home to Philly for Christmas.

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I just assume you're gonna come back with some like

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Philly top. I never really do Philly, so you don't

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I do Saint Louis all the time, all the time.

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Speaker 2: That's your crutch. I like inspiration though for real life

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like things I'm getting into. And I watched Kingdom of

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Heaven recently, so I'm sorry, sick movie. Yeah dude, I'm

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gonna talk about King Bodwin all right? Oh yeah?

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Speaker 1: Who you all as went as four?

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Speaker 2: Well? I tried to. I wanted to, because that's not

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a single King Baldwin at the rent Fair, not to crush.

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Were there were there any Swiss guards?

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Speaker 1: Not a single Swiss guard either. That costumes only one

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hundred dollars on Amazon, like that, you could do that.

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Speaker 2: People were coming up to Scott though as a wizard

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just because of his hat in his cape. If I

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if I went as Baldwin, I feel like I would

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have been approached NonStop, none stop.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, maybe even as a Swiss guard. Yes, it's a.

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Speaker 2: Swiss guards, especially if you had the the axe pike situation.

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Hallbird maybe they carry a hallbird. It is whatever. Yeah,

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you're crushing doing that. A lot of pirates, I know,

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pirates have kind of spended time since like the Greek.

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Speaker 1: Time more, I mean pirates kidnapped Caesar. But we think

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of and I assume what they were dressed as was

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sixteenth sorry, seventeenth, eighteenth century pirates.

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Speaker 2: Which again the shouldn't really be in the ren fair. Nope,

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get the fuck out.

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Speaker 1: We need to set some guidelines fellas.

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Speaker 2: There shouldn't somebody walking around dressed like Francis Drake.

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Speaker 1: You want to do a pirate. He was half pirate,

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half admiral, depending on you know, his time of I think.

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Speaker 2: The Spanish just declared him a pirate.

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Speaker 1: But yeah, man, fuck fuck those motherfuckers dressed like Jack's

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barrow assholes. But like I said, I have twelve pages.

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Let's get into already a quarter of an hour into it.

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Speaker 2: And so Baldwin was born in mid eleven sixty one.

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Bodwin's godfather was his paternal uncle, King Bodwin Third, who

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jokingly gave the Kingdom of Jerusalem as his baptismal gift.

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Speaker 1: Oh, it was a joke gift. It is a joke gift.

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Hell yeah, wait what nationality was Baldwin.

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Speaker 2: The Kingdom, though surrounded by Arab Muslim states, ruled by

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the Franks, French speaking Catholics who had arrived into the

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levant from Western Europe and remained Western in culture. Uncle

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Bodwin the third was young and recently married, making his

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nephew's ascension pretty unlikely. Okay, like that, it was a joke,

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like he's not like, hey, you're next to line.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, he was just like ha ha.

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Speaker 2: But Balbwin the IID was poisoned by his Syrian Orthodox

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doctor and died childless in eleven sixty three. His brother

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and Baldwin the Force's father, Almeric, was his heir. But

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the nobles in the Kingdom strongly opposed Amark's wife, Agnes

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Agnes of Courtney. Yep, why was she bitch? They believed

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she was a total liability bitch. She's not really a bitch.

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Her family was one of the more respected in the realm.

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How was she a liability? Though? They had lost all

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their territory in Odessa to Muslim control, and the High

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Court did not see them as a beneficial ally. Oh

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so they were just kind of sitting there like, oh,

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you you guys were important at one point. Yeah he lost.

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You're nice and all, but it's just not gonna work out. Yeah,

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you could be the king's brother's wife. Yeah you can't

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be the king's wife, right right right? The High Court

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forced Almric to agree to annulment of his marriage on

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the grounds of incest in orders to be accepted as king.

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What they weren't super related. This was just kind of

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like a bullshit excuse.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, I know, but that's what I'm saying. So he

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was like, fuck, hey babe, I'm not gonna be king

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unless I say that you were like doing your brother

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or something and divorce you. Well, annull you.

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Speaker 2: So they had similar ancestors that they could like track

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back to.

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Speaker 1: Oh so it's like the marriage never should have happened

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because they were too related, an ironic reason to not

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get married for European royalty.

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Speaker 2: But sure it was a BS excuse to get her out. Yeah, yea,

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yeah yeah, so like of course you get in all

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that into.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, it's like the opposite of the Carhart thing, right,

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nobody wants to everyone wants to have incest.

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Speaker 2: Do you gotta do incest? Shit?

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Speaker 1: It's like not all everyone does want to do incest.

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But then they're just like, oh, it's bad when we

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feel like saying it's bad.

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Speaker 2: Americ succeeded in having his and Agnes's children, Sibylla and Baldwin,

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declared legitimate, though despite the annulment, So even though they

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are no longer married, Baldwin the Fourth is now still air. Okay,

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it's still legit an important point because if they were

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just like, no, they're bastard kids now.

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Speaker 1: Yeah, he wouldn't master children living on the street.

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Speaker 2: Baldwin grew up without a mother, as Agnes remarried soon

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after the annulment and only saw Baldwin on public occasions.

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He also seldom saw his sister, who was raised in

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the convent of Saint Lazarus by their great aunt. Was

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she a nun? No? Was the antonine?

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Speaker 1: I guess no, no, none of these things.

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Speaker 2: Okay, everybody, they're just living at a convent. Sure, why not?

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I mean, he's fucking king of Jerusalem. Yeah, yeah, whatever.

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The nine year old prince was sent to live with

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William of Tire, a sophisticated, well traveled cleric. William noticed that,

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unlike other children in the playground, Baldwin did not cry

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when pinched or hit by his peers. After a while,

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because he's hard. It became apparent to the tutor that

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Baldwin could not feel pain in his right arm.

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Speaker 1: Even as a kid.

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Speaker 2: So he got he got the he got the leap early.

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H how do you even just get it?

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Speaker 1: What do you fucking brush up against a bum walk

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in the streets.

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Speaker 2: They think it was from like a wet nurse or

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something early in his childhood.

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Speaker 1: Okay, you really got to vet those wet nurses. You

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wouldn't believe.

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Speaker 2: That's how.

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Speaker 1: Uh, that's how. The worst thing ever. I've said this

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on other shows, but the funniest piece of act celebrity

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activism in the history of Earth is the Foo Fighters

305
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being anti AIDS medicine in the nineties basically, and they

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did a concert for this chick who was like, had

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a They just didn't believe that HIV caused AIDS. They

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thought there were separate things, and so you didn't need

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to take medicine if you had HIV because AIDS wouldn't

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happen and you wouldn't die Anyway. This woman who was

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in charge of it has convinced the Foo Fighters of this,

312
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and the Foo Fighters played a bunch of concerts, and

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long story short, the woman did get AIDS and she

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gave it to her baby daughter who died when she

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was like three or four.

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Speaker 2: And that baby daughter got it through Uh.

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Speaker 1: Probably the breast milk is how they believe because she

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was breastfeeding the kid. It's like like, but aren't you

319
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worried because you have HIV and aid And she's like, hey,

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HIV isn't a big deal. It doesn't I'm fine and

321
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HIV doesn't cause AIDS. Just shut up And here's the

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Food Fighters Dave taken away.

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Speaker 2: Do you think this inspired the lyrics? What if I

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say I'm not like the other What if I say

325
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I'm not just another one of your plays you're the pretender?

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What if I say I will never surrender?

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Speaker 1: Yes, directly directly related to that dead woman and her

328
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dead child who both died of AIDS.

329
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Speaker 2: Yeah, but kind of a smash it. Yeah, probably their

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biggest song.

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Speaker 1: Sometimes you have to suffer for art, and it's actually

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uh optimal if you're not the one suffering for the art.

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Speaker 2: I will say Wolf of Wall Street when they start

334
00:16:28,399 --> 00:16:30,759
playing ever long takes me out of the movie.

335
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Speaker 1: That is especially weird because Scorsese has such good musical

336
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taste usually, yeah, like he's putting the classics. Yeah, he

337
00:16:38,840 --> 00:16:40,840
put cream and rolling stones like that in all his movies.

338
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And then like, yeah, you just drop the Food Fighters

339
00:16:44,240 --> 00:16:45,879
in there, like I'm supposed to respect that.

340
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Speaker 2: Now, they hired the Arabian Christian physician Abu Solomon Duad

341
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to treat Baldwin in another Arab Abu Kayr to teach

342
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Baldwin to horse ride and essential skill set needed for

343
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Frankish warfare, because they would just be on horses nights,

344
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all fucking geared up with the joust in hand.

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Speaker 1: Look, anyone who's ever played Age of Empires two, Age

346
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of Kings or Medieval to Total War knows that the

347
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Franks are a cavalry heavy sieve and that's their Their

348
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special units are Calve.

349
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Speaker 2: There.

350
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Speaker 1: If you like Calve, you play.

351
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Speaker 2: As the Franks. Who doesn't love calv Yeah, everyone loves calv.

352
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Having sensation only one hand, Baldwin needed to learn to

353
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control the horse and battle using solely his knees and

354
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mastered riding despite the handicap. By the way rough for him.

355
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Speaker 1: Uh, his right hand being a right arm being the

356
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one that's fucked up just because I you know, most

357
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people are right handed, so I assume he had he

358
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had a Jamie landishir it.

359
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Speaker 2: Oh. Yeah, he had to figure out his left hand. Yeah,

360
00:17:52,119 --> 00:17:56,359
he had a switch. And also with the leprosy, you

361
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gotta think he was cranking it so many times.

362
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Speaker 1: Left handed, Oh no, right handed? Yeah, oh, stranger either way.

363
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Speaker 2: Because he's not going to be able to have a woman.

364
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Well he's a leopard. No, he can't fuck women.

365
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Speaker 1: He doesn't, Well he doesn't, but he could.

366
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Speaker 2: He can't.

367
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Speaker 1: Why can't he because everyone knows he has a leprosy.

368
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Speaker 2: Okay, that's uh.

369
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Speaker 1: Okay, because he's a decent man, that's okay. Yeah, that's

370
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not a total piece of shit he but.

371
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Speaker 2: Wouldn't and can't are two different things. The King of

372
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Jerusalem that kind of has the answer to the High Court.

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It's not like a total monarchy.

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Speaker 1: So I that was actually kind of a theme in

375
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Kingdom of Heaven that it was a bit more democratic

376
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out there. And yeah, now granted democratic.

377
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Speaker 2: Like he says he has final say, but they get

378
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to keep him in check.

379
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Speaker 1: Yeah, like I would call it obviously, like the normies

380
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aren't voting fucking clubs. But it's like the Roman Senate

381
00:18:53,680 --> 00:18:56,799
right there, there is a there is a larger body

382
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of people that do the governing than just like one man.

383
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Speaker 2: Yeah, there were no visible symptoms yet, and physicians hesitated

384
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to diagnose the actual leprosy because of the stigma the

385
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boy would face. Had such a diagnosis been made when

386
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he was a child, Baldwin might have been required by

387
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law to enter the Order of Saint Lazarus, which was

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a military unit composed of affected knights with leprosy.

389
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Speaker 1: That's sweet, and people need to make someone needs to

390
00:19:27,880 --> 00:19:28,799
make a movie about that.

391
00:19:29,039 --> 00:19:31,359
Speaker 2: We might have to do an entire episode of the

392
00:19:31,440 --> 00:19:34,440
Order of Saint Lazareth. Yeah, that might be a Patreon.

393
00:19:34,759 --> 00:19:37,559
That's fucking rad. But you would serve in this unit

394
00:19:37,640 --> 00:19:38,640
until you were too sick.

395
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Speaker 1: Or let's make a movie called or Diego. Let's make

396
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a movie called Zombie Knights.

397
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Speaker 2: There's The Walking Dead combined with whatever what was Greyworm?

398
00:19:46,920 --> 00:19:52,519
This unsolid they're unsolid though, well they're very sullied. But

399
00:19:52,920 --> 00:19:54,400
that was their name, I'm saying, what was their name,

400
00:19:54,519 --> 00:19:59,519
the Unsullid? Yeah, yeah, but yeah they didn't have balls. Yeah, leprosy.

401
00:19:59,559 --> 00:20:02,640
You're kind of a stone then, yeah, more or less,

402
00:20:02,680 --> 00:20:05,599
but you're ratty. But see, we would have the film

403
00:20:05,599 --> 00:20:07,519
would have to be like they ride it out to

404
00:20:07,559 --> 00:20:09,880
the end and you have nothing to live for, so

405
00:20:09,880 --> 00:20:12,839
you're like, fuck it, dude, that would be unstoppable in it.

406
00:20:13,880 --> 00:20:16,599
Oh yeah, like we've got to hold the bridge or

407
00:20:16,640 --> 00:20:17,880
the whole city will go down.

408
00:20:18,039 --> 00:20:21,480
Speaker 1: Who do we put dude, put the leopard, put the

409
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dead guys out there, and.

410
00:20:22,240 --> 00:20:23,519
Speaker 2: Then if you have to fight him, you're like, I'm

411
00:20:23,519 --> 00:20:26,160
not going near them because they're going to get leprosy.

412
00:20:26,240 --> 00:20:30,039
At this time, they think that it's it's spread that easily. Yeah,

413
00:20:30,160 --> 00:20:32,279
it's not. It's a little bit more complicated.

414
00:20:32,359 --> 00:20:35,839
Speaker 1: I mean, Baldwin had to get it from chugging bodily fluids, right.

415
00:20:36,920 --> 00:20:39,599
Speaker 2: But at the time they were very they were under

416
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the impression that Baldwin if he like touch you, got

417
00:20:43,400 --> 00:20:45,720
near you, ye, he could spread it. It was air born.

418
00:20:46,759 --> 00:20:50,200
But that said they do. He's not like, you know,

419
00:20:50,559 --> 00:20:54,599
separated from everybody. He's very much in the mix. When

420
00:20:54,640 --> 00:20:57,279
I was sixteen, I want a great victory.

421
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Speaker 1: It's just Edward Norton doing like this weird. It's a

422
00:21:01,640 --> 00:21:04,039
great it's a great acting job. But it's just like

423
00:21:04,680 --> 00:21:08,400
such a funny soft voice because he is he is

424
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a kid.

425
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Speaker 2: He dies. He died in his twenties. Yeah, okay, and

426
00:21:13,000 --> 00:21:15,680
he he like starts to pop off too, like his

427
00:21:15,720 --> 00:21:18,480
first hits, his first battle. He said sixteen, Yeah, you're

428
00:21:18,519 --> 00:21:21,200
gonna have a soft voice. Yeah, sixteen.

429
00:21:21,240 --> 00:21:24,200
Speaker 1: It's song he really hit puberty, do you. I don't

430
00:21:24,200 --> 00:21:27,759
know what leposy does with that. Actually, leprosy's God's hormone blocker.

431
00:21:29,160 --> 00:21:32,640
Speaker 2: As a kid, Baldwin was described as highly intelligent, hard worker,

432
00:21:33,039 --> 00:21:36,319
great horse rider, and fairly optimistic given the prospect of

433
00:21:36,319 --> 00:21:40,799
his illness. Good for him. Yeah, he took after his

434
00:21:40,799 --> 00:21:43,960
father in good looks and charisma. This is before the

435
00:21:44,039 --> 00:21:47,599
leprosy started to his face fell off. Yeah, which, I mean,

436
00:21:47,599 --> 00:21:52,039
that's it's unfortunate, but oh yeah, you're gonna be a

437
00:21:52,119 --> 00:21:52,759
total stud.

438
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Speaker 1: Oh no. Leoprosy is one of those things where it's

439
00:21:58,559 --> 00:22:00,359
like you grow up as a kid here about it,

440
00:22:00,440 --> 00:22:04,160
especially if you're Catholic or or go to church lot

441
00:22:04,200 --> 00:22:07,680
just because it's all over the Bible where it's just

442
00:22:07,759 --> 00:22:11,240
like you're just like the past. That's one of those

443
00:22:11,279 --> 00:22:14,920
like pillar moments of oh the past sounds horrible.

444
00:22:16,319 --> 00:22:19,039
Speaker 2: Yeah, people that just get a disease that they and

445
00:22:19,079 --> 00:22:21,720
they get kind of separated and sent off an exile

446
00:22:21,839 --> 00:22:23,279
to an island. Yeah.

447
00:22:23,880 --> 00:22:28,079
Speaker 1: Yeah, don't go over there unless you are like a

448
00:22:28,160 --> 00:22:30,240
land of cannibals. It's actually a great place to be

449
00:22:30,279 --> 00:22:31,839
fast tracked to sainthood, though.

450
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Speaker 2: I mean you get leprosy. I think they knock off

451
00:22:36,400 --> 00:22:38,960
the requirements of like miracles required.

452
00:22:40,279 --> 00:22:43,599
Speaker 1: Yeah, but there's multiples, there's multiple saints. I feel like

453
00:22:43,599 --> 00:22:46,759
that went to leper Island and cared for lepers and

454
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then got leprosy.

455
00:22:48,640 --> 00:22:50,640
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's the easiest way to get it. Yeah, you're

456
00:22:50,680 --> 00:22:53,799
just fast tracked right in. They were like, probably spit

457
00:22:53,880 --> 00:22:55,440
in my mouth please. Yeah.

458
00:22:55,519 --> 00:22:58,799
Speaker 1: Yeah, it's essentially it's the equivalent of get like doing

459
00:22:58,880 --> 00:23:03,880
a Holocaust movie for an Academy Award, or any movie

460
00:23:03,920 --> 00:23:05,359
where somebody has that disability.

461
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Speaker 2: Yeah, yep. Baldwin picked up on things very fast, but

462
00:23:08,880 --> 00:23:12,079
he's had a bit of a stutter. He was creative

463
00:23:12,440 --> 00:23:15,799
and gravitated to history. My man, my man loved history

464
00:23:16,839 --> 00:23:17,920
like any.

465
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Speaker 1: Rightfle ruler should. We're just guy, if you're a man,

466
00:23:21,359 --> 00:23:22,000
learn history.

467
00:23:22,079 --> 00:23:22,440
Speaker 2: Listen to this.

468
00:23:24,680 --> 00:23:26,359
Speaker 1: It's always funny with My wife was like, how did

469
00:23:26,359 --> 00:23:26,640
you know?

470
00:23:26,720 --> 00:23:28,880
Speaker 2: How do you know that? And it was like, because

471
00:23:28,880 --> 00:23:31,440
I live on Earth and read about it. Yeah, I

472
00:23:31,480 --> 00:23:34,119
retain information. I don't know to tell you. If I

473
00:23:34,160 --> 00:23:36,119
see it, I usually keep it in my head. I

474
00:23:36,119 --> 00:23:37,839
mean I forget a lot of things, but it's like

475
00:23:37,920 --> 00:23:40,319
I don't know, I find the Planet I live on fascinating?

476
00:23:42,240 --> 00:23:45,599
Is Tudor William remarked on Baldwin's excellent memory, stating that

477
00:23:45,680 --> 00:23:49,359
he'd forgotten either kindness nor slights done to him by others.

478
00:23:50,200 --> 00:23:52,599
He buries hatchets, but he keeps maps of where he

479
00:23:52,599 --> 00:23:59,200
puts them. Yeah. In the words of Taylor Swift, I

480
00:23:59,240 --> 00:24:01,559
thought you were like Norton says that. No, no, no.

481
00:24:01,920 --> 00:24:07,440
Speaker 1: That's a Taylor Swift lyric from Endgame featuring Future and

482
00:24:07,440 --> 00:24:08,200
It Cheeran.

483
00:24:08,559 --> 00:24:12,920
Speaker 2: Almeriic attempted to have Sibylla Mary so she could rule

484
00:24:12,960 --> 00:24:17,319
the kingdom as regent on Bobwin's behalf. When physicians informed

485
00:24:17,359 --> 00:24:22,440
him that Bodwin could develop leprosy. Almerik may have begun

486
00:24:22,559 --> 00:24:27,519
viewing Cybela as eventually monarch instead of Bodwin. Just call

487
00:24:27,559 --> 00:24:30,039
her a Green Avia Green.

488
00:24:30,160 --> 00:24:33,720
Speaker 1: Yeah, that's the Evergreen character, right, Yeah, yeah, so Avergreen

489
00:24:34,440 --> 00:24:37,480
Man Evergreen is so attractive it's painful.

490
00:24:38,359 --> 00:24:41,720
Speaker 2: But her marriage falls through, and in June eleven, seventy four,

491
00:24:42,119 --> 00:24:45,279
the king came down with dysenteryse of course he did,

492
00:24:45,880 --> 00:24:48,759
and he died on July eleventh, leaving an underage air

493
00:24:49,039 --> 00:24:52,400
as he had feared might happen. So here we go, Bobwin.

494
00:24:53,359 --> 00:24:54,960
He's about thirteen.

495
00:24:54,519 --> 00:24:55,240
Speaker 1: Around this time.

496
00:24:55,319 --> 00:25:00,400
Speaker 2: Okay. Upon his death, the High Court convened into discussed

497
00:25:00,400 --> 00:25:04,039
the succession plan. Though he had not yet been diagnosed,

498
00:25:04,079 --> 00:25:07,480
the High Court was well aware of the Royal Physician's

499
00:25:07,480 --> 00:25:11,599
suspicion that Baldwin had leprosy. Guys, he's got it, he's

500
00:25:11,599 --> 00:25:12,039
got it.

501
00:25:14,480 --> 00:25:17,200
Speaker 1: Yeah, when he was breastfeeding, when he was with that

502
00:25:17,240 --> 00:25:20,799
wet nurse, he sucked the titty off like the boob

503
00:25:20,960 --> 00:25:22,920
fell off because she had leprosy.

504
00:25:23,599 --> 00:25:26,799
Speaker 2: So he has it. Yet there was no viable alternative.

505
00:25:27,200 --> 00:25:30,319
Baldwin was the king's only son from his second marriage.

506
00:25:30,400 --> 00:25:36,400
Amerik had two daughters, and only one survived infancy. Female

507
00:25:36,440 --> 00:25:41,160
succession was allowed, but Sibella was an unmarried woman and

508
00:25:41,319 --> 00:25:47,400
Isabella was only two. The male candidates were Almerik's cousins.

509
00:25:48,400 --> 00:25:55,119
He had Prince Bohemund, the third of Antioch, Baldwin of Antioch,

510
00:25:55,759 --> 00:26:00,000
and the Count Raymond, third of Tripoli. But they're all

511
00:26:00,039 --> 00:26:06,119
politically unsuitable. What they're dicks or they had other obligations.

512
00:26:06,519 --> 00:26:08,440
Oh okay, So like Antioch.

513
00:26:08,960 --> 00:26:11,599
Speaker 1: Antioch also a super powerful city.

514
00:26:12,240 --> 00:26:16,559
Speaker 2: Also, Raymond wasn't really in the mix because he was

515
00:26:16,599 --> 00:26:19,119
in captivity for them, with the Muslims for nine years.

516
00:26:19,160 --> 00:26:21,480
Speaker 1: Oh okay, so he was, you know, like kind.

517
00:26:21,319 --> 00:26:23,640
Speaker 2: Of a war hero ish. I don't know if it's

518
00:26:23,640 --> 00:26:24,920
really a hero he got captured.

519
00:26:26,119 --> 00:26:29,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, to quote Donald Trump, I prefer soldiers who don't

520
00:26:29,480 --> 00:26:30,079
get captured.

521
00:26:30,240 --> 00:26:32,480
Speaker 2: I just don't know if that's like back then, if

522
00:26:32,519 --> 00:26:34,039
that was like a I have no idea that might

523
00:26:34,079 --> 00:26:34,680
have been a stand on.

524
00:26:34,720 --> 00:26:38,599
Speaker 1: His honestly, is nice for him. I doubt he's rotting

525
00:26:38,599 --> 00:26:41,440
in a cell right Like these blue these uh blue

526
00:26:41,440 --> 00:26:45,319
blood prisoners, they kind of just like live a life

527
00:26:45,359 --> 00:26:48,880
of like they live in a gilded cage, you know

528
00:26:48,880 --> 00:26:49,319
what I mean.

529
00:26:49,720 --> 00:26:53,440
Speaker 2: Muslim armies and everything, they were highly advanced. They were

530
00:26:53,519 --> 00:26:58,200
pretty cultured. They weren't total you know, crazy people like

531
00:26:58,200 --> 00:27:00,920
they are today some of them. No, they were more

532
00:27:00,960 --> 00:27:03,680
technologically advanced then. Yeah, that's why they would bring in

533
00:27:03,759 --> 00:27:04,680
Arab physicians.

534
00:27:04,920 --> 00:27:08,400
Speaker 1: Yeah, that was I actually saw something the other day,

535
00:27:08,480 --> 00:27:10,160
some video other day that was kind of just like

536
00:27:10,960 --> 00:27:13,079
presupposing take it with a grand sal because it was

537
00:27:13,079 --> 00:27:15,200
on TikTok, But it was just basically like it was

538
00:27:15,240 --> 00:27:19,519
like one of these things that spurred the Renaissance and

539
00:27:19,640 --> 00:27:23,640
thus your Renaissance fairs was the Islamic Golden Age. Uh no,

540
00:27:23,759 --> 00:27:25,720
because that was before the Crusades. It was all these

541
00:27:25,960 --> 00:27:28,559
but so everything was there and then the Crusades go

542
00:27:28,640 --> 00:27:30,759
and the Crusaders go over and they find all this.

543
00:27:30,880 --> 00:27:32,160
Speaker 2: They get all this info and it.

544
00:27:32,160 --> 00:27:35,799
Speaker 1: Blah blah blah from the more developed part of the

545
00:27:35,799 --> 00:27:40,640
world and bring it back west and then that starts

546
00:27:40,680 --> 00:27:43,880
to seep into Europe and then eventually the Renaissance pops off.

547
00:27:43,920 --> 00:27:47,960
Speaker 2: That's what I'm saying, the Islamic Golden Age maybe starts

548
00:27:48,279 --> 00:27:51,119
more Crusades because they're like, oh, we need to get some.

549
00:27:51,079 --> 00:27:53,039
Speaker 1: Of that that's good info over there.

550
00:27:53,119 --> 00:27:56,680
Speaker 2: We got to get some of that info info and

551
00:27:56,839 --> 00:28:00,839
just like technology, yeah, like we'll take that, yes please.

552
00:28:03,079 --> 00:28:07,720
The Young King's coronation by the Latin Patriarch of Jerusalem

553
00:28:07,720 --> 00:28:11,519
took place immediately in the Church of the Holy It's

554
00:28:11,559 --> 00:28:16,720
the paltry sepulcher Catholic. I've never heard of that Church

555
00:28:16,720 --> 00:28:18,519
of the Holy You've never heard of that. I've never

556
00:28:18,519 --> 00:28:23,119
heard it. You're Catholic, I know, can't believe you beat

557
00:28:23,160 --> 00:28:25,680
me in the Catholic off I know hid.

558
00:28:26,359 --> 00:28:27,519
Speaker 1: That should have been easily though.

559
00:28:27,519 --> 00:28:29,559
Speaker 2: I cleared you, dude, you can clear me. It super

560
00:28:30,079 --> 00:28:30,720
You won by like a.

561
00:28:30,720 --> 00:28:32,319
Speaker 1: Question, dude, I walked away.

562
00:28:32,440 --> 00:28:35,559
Speaker 2: Oh my god, No, I don't care. I'm not relitigating this.

563
00:28:36,400 --> 00:28:41,039
Whatever it is. Flags fly forever, I will fucking fly.

564
00:28:41,200 --> 00:28:43,160
Jake back out here to do another one. I will

565
00:28:43,279 --> 00:28:48,519
on my dime, and you're gonna lose again. Medieval rulers

566
00:28:48,559 --> 00:28:52,240
were typically crowned on Sundays. However, in Boblin's case, it

567
00:28:52,279 --> 00:28:55,519
was on a Monday because they chose instead to do

568
00:28:55,599 --> 00:28:58,759
so on the seventy fifth anniversary of the First Crusade

569
00:28:58,759 --> 00:29:00,000
Seizure of Jerusalem.

570
00:29:00,400 --> 00:29:03,359
Speaker 1: Yeah, the first Crusade we won. July fifteenth, First Crusade

571
00:29:03,400 --> 00:29:03,680
we won.

572
00:29:04,759 --> 00:29:09,319
Speaker 2: Third Crusade we tied. I think we lost. The Second Crusade.

573
00:29:09,640 --> 00:29:13,319
Fourth Crusade we fought ourselves. Yeah, fourth Crusade we won

574
00:29:13,720 --> 00:29:14,680
and loss and a lot.

575
00:29:14,720 --> 00:29:17,880
Speaker 1: Well, really, you know what, we sacked an Eastern Orthodox city,

576
00:29:17,920 --> 00:29:19,680
so as far as Catholics go, we won.

577
00:29:21,480 --> 00:29:23,400
Speaker 2: It's kind of a cell phone, Yeah, a.

578
00:29:23,400 --> 00:29:26,039
Speaker 1: Bit of a cell phone, considering that was like our

579
00:29:26,079 --> 00:29:30,960
buffer from the people who would eventually get all the

580
00:29:30,960 --> 00:29:32,440
way up to fucking Vienna.

581
00:29:33,640 --> 00:29:36,440
Speaker 2: Until he reached the age of fifteen, Balbwin needed a

582
00:29:36,519 --> 00:29:40,480
regent to rule in his name. The government was initially

583
00:29:40,519 --> 00:29:44,960
assumed by Miles of Plancy, who essentially served as the

584
00:29:45,000 --> 00:29:48,920
hand of the king for his father. Shortly after, Count

585
00:29:49,039 --> 00:29:52,759
Raymond third of Tripoli arrived in Jerusalem and succeeded in

586
00:29:52,799 --> 00:29:57,480
reclaiming regency as the king's closest kinsman. So though he

587
00:29:57,599 --> 00:29:59,319
was not good enough to be king, he could be

588
00:29:59,359 --> 00:30:01,839
regent Raymond of Tripoli.

589
00:30:02,119 --> 00:30:04,920
Speaker 1: Okay, just to like hold he could be a placeholder

590
00:30:04,960 --> 00:30:07,960
just the whole court. Sorry, I'm looking up Jeremy Iron's

591
00:30:08,039 --> 00:30:10,880
character from Kingdom of Heaven now because this is just

592
00:30:10,880 --> 00:30:12,319
how I know anything about this.

593
00:30:14,039 --> 00:30:16,960
Speaker 2: Miles was murdered while trying to extend his role on

594
00:30:17,000 --> 00:30:21,000
the government. Were in the government, so he didn't want

595
00:30:21,000 --> 00:30:24,200
to give up power. So our boy, Miles of Plancy,

596
00:30:24,400 --> 00:30:28,640
you're out. It's a head etonic yet to go. No

597
00:30:28,720 --> 00:30:30,519
hand of the king was appointed for two years, and

598
00:30:30,599 --> 00:30:33,440
the young and sickly king presided over a high Court

599
00:30:33,480 --> 00:30:37,359
meeting when the regent was away on military duties in Tripoli.

600
00:30:38,599 --> 00:30:43,519
Baldwin's mother, though, returned to the court when Raymond became regent,

601
00:30:44,279 --> 00:30:46,240
having grown up without her since the age of two.

602
00:30:47,200 --> 00:30:49,160
Balbwin really had no memories of his mother.

603
00:30:49,880 --> 00:30:54,599
Speaker 1: So he was just like, oh, hi, who are you?

604
00:30:54,599 --> 00:30:55,640
You kind of left me?

605
00:30:55,880 --> 00:30:58,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, wow. It wasn't really her fault. Eh, that's true.

606
00:30:58,480 --> 00:31:01,359
I don't really hold it against her. She became devoted

607
00:31:01,359 --> 00:31:03,880
and kind to him and developed a strong attachment to her.

608
00:31:04,440 --> 00:31:07,240
Or he developed a strong attachment to her, most likely

609
00:31:07,279 --> 00:31:09,880
because he simply just didn't really have women in his life.

610
00:31:10,759 --> 00:31:14,039
It's the only intimate relationship he can have, kind of.

611
00:31:14,640 --> 00:31:16,400
Speaker 1: It was nice to have a lady being nice to

612
00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:20,799
him a type of affection. Yeah, a mom. And he

613
00:31:20,839 --> 00:31:22,359
was still young, right, he was like fifteen.

614
00:31:22,680 --> 00:31:26,079
Speaker 2: Yeah, you know, he didn't even get to develop the

615
00:31:26,119 --> 00:31:28,319
face with the fuck out. He didn't get to get

616
00:31:28,359 --> 00:31:31,079
tired of his mom. She was already aware after years

617
00:31:31,160 --> 00:31:34,720
you pirchually a bit wone you did ever, No, so

618
00:31:34,759 --> 00:31:38,799
he just reverted back to toddler like he was like, Mommy,

619
00:31:40,559 --> 00:31:42,839
what my kids are like all the time? They believe

620
00:31:42,920 --> 00:31:49,839
puberty accelerated his leprosy. His condition worse than rapidly. Mostly

621
00:31:49,880 --> 00:31:54,920
severely affected were his limbs and face, which made subjects

622
00:31:54,960 --> 00:31:56,279
uneasy to approach him.

623
00:31:56,720 --> 00:32:01,519
Speaker 1: It's like, oh, so, thus the sweet mask.

624
00:32:01,440 --> 00:32:02,039
Speaker 2: Get the mask.

625
00:32:02,839 --> 00:32:03,720
Speaker 1: That wouldn't.

626
00:32:03,799 --> 00:32:06,240
Speaker 2: I don't even know if that's accurate. Oh, I don't know.

627
00:32:06,279 --> 00:32:09,960
Speaker 1: If he has a masks he might, he probably would.

628
00:32:10,799 --> 00:32:16,359
Speaker 2: It makes sense. Yeah, Baldwin was never separated from the royals, though.

629
00:32:16,440 --> 00:32:18,720
As a leopard, Baldwin could not marry or expect to

630
00:32:18,720 --> 00:32:21,519
have children. He thus became a priority to a range

631
00:32:21,519 --> 00:32:22,720
of marriage for his sister.

632
00:32:23,400 --> 00:32:26,240
Speaker 1: There is no historical counts of him wearing a mask.

633
00:32:26,599 --> 00:32:29,559
That is purely an invention of Ridley Scott. Ridley Scott

634
00:32:29,559 --> 00:32:30,559
does what Ridley Scott wants.

635
00:32:30,640 --> 00:32:31,839
Speaker 2: Yeah, don't my mind.

636
00:32:31,920 --> 00:32:35,799
Speaker 1: Don't blame cousin.

637
00:32:35,880 --> 00:32:41,640
Speaker 2: Raymond's choice was William Longsword a' mont ferret. So he's

638
00:32:41,680 --> 00:32:44,640
like this, this is the dude. It'll be a good

639
00:32:44,640 --> 00:32:46,920
play for your sister to marry him. He can become

640
00:32:47,000 --> 00:32:49,880
king one day once you're dead. They're already coming up

641
00:32:49,880 --> 00:32:53,160
with the succession plan because obviously, yeah, they know he's

642
00:32:53,200 --> 00:32:54,920
gonna die. That is funny that he was just walking

643
00:32:54,960 --> 00:32:58,480
around with a rotten face the whole time though. Yeah.

644
00:32:58,680 --> 00:33:02,039
On the second anniversary of his nation July fifteenth, eleven

645
00:33:02,079 --> 00:33:05,799
seventy six, Baldwin reached the age of majority, and Raymond's

646
00:33:05,920 --> 00:33:09,400
regency lapsed. That's a suggestion of his mother. The king

647
00:33:09,440 --> 00:33:15,119
appointed his loyal and capable maternal uncle, Joscelyn of Courtney,

648
00:33:15,559 --> 00:33:19,960
to the office of Sanchel, which is essentially the hand

649
00:33:19,960 --> 00:33:22,319
of the king, and arranged for him to marry a

650
00:33:22,400 --> 00:33:26,559
rich heiress, Agnes of MILLI. Oh, no, don't make the

651
00:33:26,599 --> 00:33:27,759
one marry him.

652
00:33:28,160 --> 00:33:30,799
Speaker 1: No, not not Baldwin. Oh okay, okay.

653
00:33:30,799 --> 00:33:32,720
Speaker 2: I was like, what this dude's get in a position

654
00:33:32,759 --> 00:33:35,880
and a wife? Oh okay, Wow, what a day for him,

655
00:33:35,920 --> 00:33:38,960
his uncle. So the change in government signaled a new

656
00:33:39,000 --> 00:33:46,079
Frankish approach to the Egyptian ruler. Saladein Hadeen Saladin, Saladin,

657
00:33:47,000 --> 00:33:50,920
Saladin Saladin. Yeah, all right, there's a lot of ways say it.

658
00:33:51,759 --> 00:33:54,359
Who had been allowed by Raymen to encircle the Crusader

659
00:33:54,400 --> 00:33:58,359
States by conquering Muslim principalities in Syria due to a treaty.

660
00:33:58,880 --> 00:34:03,160
So when ms in power, he's just like, yeah, go ahead, Saladein.

661
00:34:03,240 --> 00:34:05,799
You could pop off, we don't care whatever. That's a

662
00:34:05,839 --> 00:34:09,199
good idea. I'm sure I don't want to fuck with you.

663
00:34:09,320 --> 00:34:11,480
Speaker 1: I feel like that's a thing that I didn't even

664
00:34:11,599 --> 00:34:14,440
really know, but it sounds totally right, which is like

665
00:34:14,960 --> 00:34:19,800
Saladin is he's a Muslim hero for like truly like

666
00:34:19,840 --> 00:34:26,079
a religious hero for fighting the Crusaders, but you know

667
00:34:26,559 --> 00:34:28,400
he also fought other Muslims.

668
00:34:28,880 --> 00:34:31,159
Speaker 2: It's time to take control.

669
00:34:30,840 --> 00:34:33,320
Speaker 1: Of the region and stuff like that. He was Egyptian

670
00:34:33,360 --> 00:34:34,840
so was he was he a malmlook or whatever.

671
00:34:35,159 --> 00:34:39,320
Speaker 2: Baldwin did not re up Raymonds peace treaty with saladein

672
00:34:39,719 --> 00:34:43,639
firmly agreeing with Joscelyn that the Sultan's power needed to

673
00:34:43,639 --> 00:34:45,719
be curved before they were totally consumed.

674
00:34:46,599 --> 00:34:51,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, probably could call also Saladin a legitimate like military genius.

675
00:34:51,880 --> 00:34:55,599
Speaker 2: So yeah, deeply devoted to the Muslim religion and saw

676
00:34:55,599 --> 00:34:57,719
the Crusades of ten ninety nine and the expansion of

677
00:34:57,760 --> 00:35:00,679
the now Christian Kingdom as an affront to his religion.

678
00:35:01,159 --> 00:35:05,199
So he took it personal. He's like, yeah, uh, they

679
00:35:05,360 --> 00:35:08,199
fucked us, so I'm gonna I'm gonna get it back, you.

680
00:35:08,199 --> 00:35:11,800
Speaker 1: Know, fuck him back. It's a real Treaty of Versailles situation.

681
00:35:12,760 --> 00:35:15,559
Not not that Saladin is Hitler, but it is. The

682
00:35:15,639 --> 00:35:19,199
Germans were just like, I want another shot at France.

683
00:35:19,440 --> 00:35:24,639
Fuck them and Saladin the same way. Saladin's like doesn't

684
00:35:24,639 --> 00:35:26,840
sit right with me the way they got Jerusalem.

685
00:35:26,400 --> 00:35:30,760
Speaker 2: Bro Baldwin began an offensive and planned a full scale

686
00:35:30,920 --> 00:35:34,400
tech on Egypt. With his advisors, the king took advantage

687
00:35:34,400 --> 00:35:38,880
of Saladin's campaign in Aleppo to lead a raid around

688
00:35:38,880 --> 00:35:43,920
the Damascus. So he's like, Saladin's over here, let's hit

689
00:35:43,960 --> 00:35:44,519
him where he's not.

690
00:35:45,239 --> 00:35:48,519
Speaker 1: Yeah, let's get not that far. Aleppo and Damascus are

691
00:35:48,519 --> 00:35:50,599
both in modern day Syria, right, Yeah, but.

692
00:35:50,559 --> 00:35:52,159
Speaker 2: They want to get his attention. Yeah, you don't take

693
00:35:52,199 --> 00:35:56,400
him head on immediately, no, no, no. He and his

694
00:35:56,440 --> 00:36:00,000
advisors also then decided to intervene in Saladin's war against

695
00:36:00,880 --> 00:36:05,679
the Order of the Assassins. Saladin was fighting the Assassins, Yeah,

696
00:36:05,679 --> 00:36:08,159
because they tried to kill him. Oh shit, they took

697
00:36:08,159 --> 00:36:11,159
a hit on him and they failed clearly. So he

698
00:36:11,239 --> 00:36:13,280
was just like, I need to rage warn these bitches.

699
00:36:13,360 --> 00:36:15,159
Speaker 1: Yeah wait was he? No, but he was the Mongols

700
00:36:15,159 --> 00:36:18,519
that ultimately got up. Yeah, guys, but Saladin could.

701
00:36:18,400 --> 00:36:20,199
Speaker 2: Order the Assassins were around for like two hundred years.

702
00:36:20,239 --> 00:36:22,480
Speaker 1: Yeah, so this is like right smack in the middle

703
00:36:22,480 --> 00:36:22,719
of it.

704
00:36:22,800 --> 00:36:25,880
Speaker 2: So yeah, Also other Muslims he attacks, but granted he's

705
00:36:25,880 --> 00:36:29,920
probably like you are not real Muslims, Like you're giving

706
00:36:29,920 --> 00:36:34,360
a bunch of kids, drugs and hookers and promise and

707
00:36:34,440 --> 00:36:37,159
then a lot of rules. Yeah you can't be doing this.

708
00:36:37,320 --> 00:36:40,719
Speaker 1: Also though that was in Iran.

709
00:36:40,440 --> 00:36:46,440
Speaker 2: Right, Yeah, Alan Mutt was so moot. Were they different?

710
00:36:47,440 --> 00:36:51,119
Speaker 1: Was one sunning one Shia too, because the Iran is

711
00:36:51,119 --> 00:36:53,920
is different than like Saudi Arabia and Egypt and stuff

712
00:36:53,920 --> 00:36:54,119
like that.

713
00:36:54,239 --> 00:36:56,960
Speaker 2: Order the assassins, I mean they had condo stations all

714
00:36:56,960 --> 00:36:59,320
over Okay, I don't even know if they had adhered

715
00:36:59,760 --> 00:37:02,639
two blood blind thing. Yeah, they didn't care. I think

716
00:37:02,639 --> 00:37:05,400
it was just more like who can we get? Yeah,

717
00:37:05,800 --> 00:37:09,639
what you know, peasant child? Can we turn into the child? Stone?

718
00:37:09,679 --> 00:37:10,280
Speaker 1: Cold killer?

719
00:37:11,039 --> 00:37:15,639
Speaker 2: Taylor's us time. On August first, Baldwin and Raymond led

720
00:37:15,639 --> 00:37:19,119
the Armies of Jerusalem in Tripoli, respectively, in the Raid

721
00:37:19,280 --> 00:37:22,920
of Bega Valley which is now modern day Lebanon, where

722
00:37:22,960 --> 00:37:26,519
they defeated the Garrison of Damascus, forcing Sladeen to abandon

723
00:37:26,559 --> 00:37:29,280
his campaign and come defend his own turf.

724
00:37:30,559 --> 00:37:31,559
Speaker 1: Was this the Great Battle?

725
00:37:32,320 --> 00:37:36,239
Speaker 2: When I was sixteen? That great battle? They fed a lot? Okay,

726
00:37:36,280 --> 00:37:38,960
fair enough. I don't know if there's like one, well,

727
00:37:39,000 --> 00:37:41,559
you've got to be one that stands out. There's one

728
00:37:41,559 --> 00:37:44,000
where he's like outnumbered and wins. That's probably the one

729
00:37:44,039 --> 00:37:47,639
that's probably it. Yeah, William the Longsword marries Bob Win's

730
00:37:47,639 --> 00:37:52,480
sister November eleven, seventy six, despite arguments from some council

731
00:37:52,519 --> 00:37:57,559
members who no longer trusted cousin Emperor Frederick's ability to

732
00:37:57,599 --> 00:38:02,000
aid the kingdom. So like like, eh, maybe don't blow

733
00:38:02,039 --> 00:38:04,599
your lead on this dude, because he's not really gonna

734
00:38:05,000 --> 00:38:05,719
help our cause.

735
00:38:05,840 --> 00:38:09,159
Speaker 1: Wait was his cousin, Frederick Barbarossa and it was him. Okay,

736
00:38:09,239 --> 00:38:13,119
Now everyone knows from the Third Crusade that the two

737
00:38:13,119 --> 00:38:17,400
big stars of it were uh Saladin and Richard the

738
00:38:17,480 --> 00:38:21,440
Lionheart of England, Right, But Richard Delonheart was not the

739
00:38:21,440 --> 00:38:22,519
only person who was on the way.

740
00:38:22,519 --> 00:38:26,519
Speaker 2: Frederick Barbarossa was also a big dick.

741
00:38:26,599 --> 00:38:30,679
Speaker 1: Military guy at the time, like an absolute like think

742
00:38:30,719 --> 00:38:33,199
of it, think of like an NBA like think of

743
00:38:33,280 --> 00:38:36,400
just like teaming up two great NBA players, Right, He's like, funck, dude,

744
00:38:36,360 --> 00:38:37,960
We're gonna have both these guys on the same team.

745
00:38:38,000 --> 00:38:43,199
Speaker 2: That's fucking wild. But uh Freddie uh died on the

746
00:38:43,239 --> 00:38:46,599
way to the Holy Land. Yeah, and his force was

747
00:38:46,639 --> 00:38:48,760
not the same. Sometimes you try to get the super

748
00:38:48,760 --> 00:38:52,679
team together and we'll talk about later. I don't want

749
00:38:52,679 --> 00:38:53,840
to work together now.

750
00:38:54,000 --> 00:38:55,559
Speaker 1: Well they did, dude, it would have.

751
00:38:55,599 --> 00:38:57,840
Speaker 2: I don't know what would have happened in that crusade

752
00:38:57,880 --> 00:39:02,000
if if Frederick Roberosa didn't die like that is actually

753
00:39:02,039 --> 00:39:04,840
a huge question, big what if? Oh yeah, huge what if?

754
00:39:04,840 --> 00:39:08,679
In my opinion. Bobwin offered to resign the throne to William,

755
00:39:09,039 --> 00:39:11,320
but William actually declined this because he knew he had

756
00:39:11,400 --> 00:39:13,880
lack of support from the nobility, So probably good move

757
00:39:13,880 --> 00:39:15,800
for him. Still, he still marries his sister. He just

758
00:39:15,800 --> 00:39:18,280
would have got dicked down by the by the council,

759
00:39:18,440 --> 00:39:21,719
like just yeah, yeah. In order to carry out his

760
00:39:21,920 --> 00:39:26,000
attacks on Egypt, Bobwin needed naval support. He then sent

761
00:39:26,920 --> 00:39:30,440
kind of a man that becomes his like his military dude,

762
00:39:30,920 --> 00:39:36,880
his guy, Reinald of chantillon the villain Ronald of Chantillan.

763
00:39:37,039 --> 00:39:40,159
Speaker 1: He's like he's cold, Yeah, he's got it.

764
00:39:40,199 --> 00:39:43,920
Speaker 2: In the battlefield in April eleven seventy seven, William the

765
00:39:43,960 --> 00:39:46,000
long Sword fell ill with malaria.

766
00:39:46,519 --> 00:39:47,239
Speaker 1: Tough way to go.

767
00:39:47,639 --> 00:39:52,480
Speaker 2: It doesn't sound fun and uh, can you.

768
00:39:52,000 --> 00:39:55,079
Speaker 1: Give you imagine you're just like walking around having a

769
00:39:55,079 --> 00:39:58,760
good day, drinking some fucking ale on your patio, on

770
00:39:58,800 --> 00:40:04,000
your suite mid Mediterranean castle patio, and you just like

771
00:40:04,000 --> 00:40:04,480
look down.

772
00:40:04,559 --> 00:40:07,360
Speaker 2: You're like, ah, it's a mosquito, Like what the fuck?

773
00:40:07,719 --> 00:40:08,239
Got it? Oh?

774
00:40:08,280 --> 00:40:10,599
Speaker 1: No, got yeah? And then it's like fuck, like hits you?

775
00:40:11,000 --> 00:40:11,280
Speaker 2: Fuck?

776
00:40:12,400 --> 00:40:12,880
Speaker 1: Ah?

777
00:40:13,199 --> 00:40:14,639
Speaker 2: Or is that the one?

778
00:40:14,920 --> 00:40:15,920
Speaker 1: Ah?

779
00:40:16,760 --> 00:40:19,679
Speaker 2: Living in the past sucks ass, This is the best

780
00:40:19,719 --> 00:40:25,239
time to be alive. Bye fucking far. Baldwin decides to

781
00:40:25,360 --> 00:40:29,159
visit him and he becomes gravely ill too. Well, would

782
00:40:29,199 --> 00:40:32,599
he hit another puberty? Oh, he's the malaria. He got

783
00:40:32,599 --> 00:40:35,719
malaria too. Yeah. On top of like you know, he's

784
00:40:35,760 --> 00:40:38,760
got leprosy, so I imagine it's like an autoimmune thing.

785
00:40:39,119 --> 00:40:41,519
Speaker 1: It's like getting a cold when you have cancer, right, Like,

786
00:40:41,920 --> 00:40:42,400
it's just.

787
00:40:44,719 --> 00:40:48,519
Speaker 2: William dies in June and he leaves Baldwin's sister pregnant.

788
00:40:48,920 --> 00:40:54,239
While Baldwin is still very much sick. He kind of

789
00:40:54,280 --> 00:40:57,760
powers through it, man, he uh it. While he's kind

790
00:40:57,800 --> 00:41:00,360
of down bad though, he entrusts the king ship in

791
00:41:00,360 --> 00:41:02,760
the government and military to Raynault.

792
00:41:05,239 --> 00:41:07,559
Speaker 1: That's the correct correct way to pronounce it. By the way,

793
00:41:07,679 --> 00:41:13,119
if you want to know how to well shot, you

794
00:41:13,239 --> 00:41:15,800
just say half. You only say half the consonants and

795
00:41:15,880 --> 00:41:19,280
vows and well you only say half the consonants.

796
00:41:19,400 --> 00:41:21,400
Speaker 2: You barely say the vowels, and.

797
00:41:21,639 --> 00:41:22,960
Speaker 1: Just act like you a peanut butter in your mouth

798
00:41:22,960 --> 00:41:26,679
while you're doing it and make it a little gay.

799
00:41:26,079 --> 00:41:30,960
Speaker 2: So I know. Doing so, he snubs the ex regent

800
00:41:31,679 --> 00:41:34,480
and the Count of Tripoli and his you know, cousins

801
00:41:34,760 --> 00:41:37,280
or his dad's cousins. So I guess his first cousin removed?

802
00:41:37,320 --> 00:41:39,960
Whatever the fuck that is, Raymond, first cousin removed? It

803
00:41:40,039 --> 00:41:43,000
was his second cousin. No, no, first cousin removed? Is

804
00:41:43,039 --> 00:41:46,920
I guess your parents cousins? I looked it up. I

805
00:41:46,960 --> 00:41:50,719
didn't realize that, okay, because but like, what else would

806
00:41:50,760 --> 00:41:54,519
you call your fucking parents cousins? Strangers?

807
00:41:55,639 --> 00:41:59,400
Speaker 1: That's probably true. Who the fuck is that guy? Well,

808
00:41:59,480 --> 00:42:02,039
my dad, I actually i've my I know one of

809
00:42:02,079 --> 00:42:05,199
my dad's cousins, and it's who's the old guy obviously

810
00:42:05,239 --> 00:42:07,320
at this point, but like and there's friends and everything,

811
00:42:07,360 --> 00:42:09,800
but yeah, it's kind of like weird now.

812
00:42:09,840 --> 00:42:14,239
Speaker 2: Baldwin's first cousin, Count Philip of Flanders, arrived in the

813
00:42:14,239 --> 00:42:18,000
East in September. He brought to Baldwin financial aid from

814
00:42:18,000 --> 00:42:22,360
another cousin, King Henry the Second of England. Everyone's related. Yeah,

815
00:42:22,440 --> 00:42:28,000
some capacity. Lol. At the incest divorce, right, it's like,

816
00:42:28,039 --> 00:42:29,280
who am I supposed to marry?

817
00:42:29,639 --> 00:42:31,280
Speaker 1: Wait, so, King Henry the Second of England.

818
00:42:31,360 --> 00:42:32,800
Speaker 2: So is this is that? I wonder that is that

819
00:42:32,880 --> 00:42:36,880
Richard's dad? Henry the Second? So you gotta think this

820
00:42:36,920 --> 00:42:41,159
is the eleven you know, sixties, eleven seventies.

821
00:42:41,719 --> 00:42:44,360
Speaker 1: I'll look it up real quick, Henry the Second. It'll

822
00:42:44,360 --> 00:42:45,400
list his parents right away.

823
00:42:45,480 --> 00:42:53,559
Speaker 2: Yeah, uh, yep, that's his dad. Or yes, that's his dad. Yeah,

824
00:42:54,360 --> 00:43:00,480
that's Richard Loinhart's dad. Gotcha. Baldwin had taken himself back

825
00:43:00,519 --> 00:43:02,960
to Jerusalem once again, wanted to discuss giving up power

826
00:43:03,000 --> 00:43:06,119
to the General Council because whenever he felt like he

827
00:43:06,280 --> 00:43:08,079
didn't have it, Yeah, he was like, all right here,

828
00:43:08,119 --> 00:43:10,360
it's just like somebody else needs to take power, Like, hey, guys,

829
00:43:11,000 --> 00:43:12,639
pretired of toe fell off?

830
00:43:14,840 --> 00:43:16,360
Speaker 1: Could we just And it's not like he's not going

831
00:43:16,360 --> 00:43:16,800
to battle.

832
00:43:17,000 --> 00:43:18,880
Speaker 2: He is leading his men.

833
00:43:19,519 --> 00:43:23,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's the zombie King. It's that the title for

834
00:43:23,039 --> 00:43:24,880
the show The Zombie King Israel.

835
00:43:25,320 --> 00:43:30,199
Speaker 2: Probably that on the advice of which he offered a

836
00:43:30,280 --> 00:43:34,639
regency to Philip, Philip actually declines and Reynold retains his

837
00:43:34,639 --> 00:43:41,679
his post so Ynld. He's got all the power. He's

838
00:43:41,719 --> 00:43:45,480
the dude. The Byzantines sent a war fleet in preparation

839
00:43:45,599 --> 00:43:49,239
of the invasion of Egypt, but they withdraw because Philip

840
00:43:49,239 --> 00:43:54,920
of Flanders, the antiox, Raymond of Tripoli, the Grand Master

841
00:43:55,119 --> 00:44:02,880
of like the Knights Hospital, Knights hospitalter Hospital Hospital, Roger Demons.

842
00:44:03,840 --> 00:44:07,239
They can't agree on anything. There's like arguing over tactics

843
00:44:07,280 --> 00:44:09,719
and like, no, there's another game. No, we're doing it

844
00:44:09,760 --> 00:44:10,239
that way.

845
00:44:10,360 --> 00:44:12,079
Speaker 1: There's another game I really want to play, and it's

846
00:44:12,079 --> 00:44:14,519
actually free to play at well, there's several versions of

847
00:44:14,519 --> 00:44:17,920
this game, but it's called Crusader Kings two is the

848
00:44:17,920 --> 00:44:19,360
one I want to play because it's free as I

849
00:44:19,400 --> 00:44:20,760
just want to downloaded my Mac and a lot of

850
00:44:20,800 --> 00:44:21,719
these you can't get on Mac.

851
00:44:22,760 --> 00:44:24,400
Speaker 2: But anyway, if.

852
00:44:24,239 --> 00:44:26,599
Speaker 1: You look at like a map, like a true political

853
00:44:26,639 --> 00:44:31,320
map of Europe, and uh, even this area during this

854
00:44:31,400 --> 00:44:39,400
time period, like it's thousands of micro kingdoms, like like France,

855
00:44:39,719 --> 00:44:43,039
France proto France is pretty fucking big comparatively, but like

856
00:44:43,159 --> 00:44:46,559
Italy's eight different things, Germany is one hundred different fucking things.

857
00:44:47,000 --> 00:44:49,880
I mean, even even what is now modern day France

858
00:44:50,599 --> 00:44:53,519
is like still six different kingdoms, and some of those

859
00:44:53,599 --> 00:44:56,519
kingdoms overlap between, like France and Italy, France and Belgium,

860
00:44:56,719 --> 00:44:59,800
France and Germany, I mean France and Germany basically up

861
00:45:00,039 --> 00:45:01,719
until the end of World War two.

862
00:45:01,760 --> 00:45:04,840
Speaker 2: Even small ass. England's like six or seven kingdoms. You've

863
00:45:04,840 --> 00:45:08,440
got England, Wales, Scotland right there. They weren't called that

864
00:45:08,440 --> 00:45:15,599
back then, but it's all be like northumber Oh yeah, yeah, yeah,

865
00:45:15,639 --> 00:45:16,880
all that stuff for sure.

866
00:45:17,199 --> 00:45:21,519
Speaker 1: England alone, like before everyone thinks about the United Kingdom,

867
00:45:21,559 --> 00:45:22,960
they're like, oh, when did the United Kingdom?

868
00:45:23,079 --> 00:45:25,920
Speaker 2: When did the UK coalesce? And everything?

869
00:45:26,239 --> 00:45:30,760
Speaker 1: But first England had to be united, which this is

870
00:45:30,800 --> 00:45:32,000
before William the Conqueror.

871
00:45:32,320 --> 00:45:35,119
Speaker 2: The Conqueror was like ten sixty six, I think ten

872
00:45:35,159 --> 00:45:35,800
sixty six one.

873
00:45:36,079 --> 00:45:40,840
Speaker 1: Yeah, but England was already like mostly united at that point.

874
00:45:40,880 --> 00:45:43,920
But there were a lot of wars before that that

875
00:45:44,280 --> 00:45:47,800
were basically involved just United England with the Umbrians and

876
00:45:47,840 --> 00:45:48,880
blah blah blah.

877
00:45:49,440 --> 00:45:53,400
Speaker 2: So they're arguing about shit. Saude's power remains unchecked the

878
00:45:53,440 --> 00:45:58,159
Byzantine Alliance collapses. Balbwin continues to court the Greek patriarch

879
00:45:58,199 --> 00:46:01,480
and hopes that the Byzantines would committed to the kingdom.

880
00:46:02,079 --> 00:46:04,960
Things are kind of going poorly. Phillip leaves the Kingdom

881
00:46:05,000 --> 00:46:07,239
of Jerusalem with his troops in October of eleven seventy

882
00:46:07,239 --> 00:46:09,599
seven to help Raymond of Tripoli attacked the Muslim held

883
00:46:09,639 --> 00:46:13,599
city of Hama. The Frankish army in northern Syria. Saladein

884
00:46:13,679 --> 00:46:17,719
seizes an opportunity to invade Baldwin's kingdom on November eighteenth.

885
00:46:17,760 --> 00:46:20,199
So like they're kind of like split all over the

886
00:46:20,199 --> 00:46:22,760
map trying to defend shit, and Saladin's like, oh dude,

887
00:46:23,000 --> 00:46:24,360
now we attack. Now's the time.

888
00:46:24,440 --> 00:46:28,440
Speaker 1: Yeah, So here's your battle. Here's the battle, great victory.

889
00:46:29,320 --> 00:46:32,320
How big is the Kingdom of Jerusalem because people are

890
00:46:32,320 --> 00:46:34,039
probably listening thinking it's just the city.

891
00:46:34,679 --> 00:46:38,599
Speaker 2: No, those still recovering from malaria. Baldwin rode out to

892
00:46:38,639 --> 00:46:42,400
meet the Sultan. Well, the nice templar hurried to defend Gaza.

893
00:46:42,880 --> 00:46:45,920
Seeing how drastically outnumbered he was, the king retreated into

894
00:46:45,920 --> 00:46:49,519
the city. Saladin to saw the strength of his numbers

895
00:46:49,559 --> 00:46:52,280
and confidently proceeded towards Jerusalem.

896
00:46:52,639 --> 00:46:54,679
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897
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898
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899
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902
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903
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904
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905
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906
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907
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908
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909
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910
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911
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912
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913
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914
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915
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916
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917
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918
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919
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921
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922
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926
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928
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929
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930
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to be on. If you want to avoid meat, you

932
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can do that. If you want low calorie.

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Speaker 2: You can do that. If you just want kind of

934
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a well rounded, normal situation that's what I do. You

935
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can do that.

936
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Speaker 1: If you want extra protein, you can do that as well.

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They do Keto two. I'm telling you anything you need.

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What is fitbod.

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Speaker 2: Fitbod is a personal trainer in your pocket, Your damn right,

961
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it is.

962
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Speaker 1: They do everything you need no matter what your workout is,

963
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because they have thousands of videos on their app that

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can imagine with personal trainers showing you how to do it.

966
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And furthermore, they know how to tell you how to

967
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exercise no matter what you have, whether it belonged to

968
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a dope gin like Dan.

969
00:50:38,400 --> 00:50:41,480
Speaker 2: You could have no equipment at all and do a

970
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workout from your home.

971
00:50:42,760 --> 00:50:46,480
Speaker 1: Body weight, push ups, sit ups, whatever. They take into

972
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account what you have and then they track your progress.

973
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They track your goals what you want. You can tell

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them I want to lose weight, I want to gain mass,

975
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I want to be strong, I want to have sexy

976
00:50:56,039 --> 00:50:56,639
your arms, they.

977
00:50:56,559 --> 00:50:59,360
Speaker 2: Would ever tell you what muscles are recovering, what you

978
00:50:59,360 --> 00:51:00,199
should rest.

979
00:51:00,199 --> 00:51:02,280
Speaker 1: So they tell you each day is a different set

980
00:51:02,280 --> 00:51:04,760
of workouts and all that stuff. It is literally I

981
00:51:04,800 --> 00:51:06,519
can go on and on about like what it is,

982
00:51:06,559 --> 00:51:08,360
but it is literally just what Dan said, It's a

983
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personal trainer in your pocket that costs a lot.

984
00:51:11,239 --> 00:51:14,239
Speaker 2: Of people do overwork on muscles job, including myself. I

985
00:51:14,760 --> 00:51:17,639
have done that in the past. Shoulders, chest, yeah, just

986
00:51:17,679 --> 00:51:20,199
overwork the muscles. You gotta let it rest in order

987
00:51:20,239 --> 00:51:24,559
for the muscle to rebuild. It also must rest.

988
00:51:24,440 --> 00:51:26,119
Speaker 1: Right, you don't get better by not sleeping.

989
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Speaker 2: No, you gotta sleep. You gotta sleep, see especially the

990
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most important thing.

991
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Speaker 1: And your muscles need to sleep too, and fitbod will

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1002
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fit bod dot emmy slash softcore. So actually it's kind

1003
00:52:03,559 --> 00:52:07,280
of pretty big in terms of like it just depends

1004
00:52:07,320 --> 00:52:10,199
what you want to say. So, like, this is a

1005
00:52:10,360 --> 00:52:13,719
map of the quote Kingdom of Jerusalem and its vassals,

1006
00:52:13,800 --> 00:52:15,360
so it's kind of like all of Israel in a

1007
00:52:15,400 --> 00:52:18,119
little bit of a couple other countries. So but I

1008
00:52:18,119 --> 00:52:20,960
don't know if that means that Saladin hit like the

1009
00:52:21,000 --> 00:52:24,920
actual like Jerusalem part itself. Imagine if like, you know,

1010
00:52:25,320 --> 00:52:27,239
just talking about invading in the United States of America

1011
00:52:27,280 --> 00:52:29,400
and it's like, but did they invade the US or

1012
00:52:29,400 --> 00:52:32,039
do they invade the capitol like the Virginia the DMV area.

1013
00:52:32,199 --> 00:52:36,480
Speaker 2: I don't know. Baldwin managed to contact the Templars in

1014
00:52:36,599 --> 00:52:40,239
ordered them to abandon Gaza and join him, contrary to

1015
00:52:40,320 --> 00:52:45,880
the Sultan's expectations. Baldwin and Raynal then wrote out to

1016
00:52:46,000 --> 00:52:49,920
join with the Templars and attack his dispersed army at

1017
00:52:50,320 --> 00:52:51,519
Mont Gazard.

1018
00:52:51,800 --> 00:52:54,880
Speaker 1: Okay, I don't know the fuck Mount Gizzard, Mount Gizzard.

1019
00:52:55,039 --> 00:53:00,800
Speaker 2: Fuck it. It might be Saladin who barely suffered a

1020
00:53:00,800 --> 00:53:01,519
crushing defeat.

1021
00:53:02,519 --> 00:53:04,320
Speaker 1: What happened to him? Did he get he almost get

1022
00:53:04,320 --> 00:53:07,480
got in battle? He got nicked by what like an arrow?

1023
00:53:07,599 --> 00:53:10,360
Got a Gellow's sword. Probably, By the way, every time

1024
00:53:10,440 --> 00:53:13,119
Baldwin is swinging his sword, he should first cut a

1025
00:53:13,119 --> 00:53:15,159
bit of his arm, like he needs to poison his

1026
00:53:15,239 --> 00:53:17,119
sword with leprosy every swing.

1027
00:53:17,400 --> 00:53:19,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, just take your own blood.

1028
00:53:19,719 --> 00:53:23,400
Speaker 1: Oh my god, his sword should have been covered if

1029
00:53:23,400 --> 00:53:27,079
it's every arrow, yeah, like every Baldwin should just be

1030
00:53:27,079 --> 00:53:32,239
walking amongst the archers and like each one's just like

1031
00:53:32,239 --> 00:53:35,920
like yes, I mean, if you really want to win

1032
00:53:35,960 --> 00:53:38,880
a war, how bad do you want it?

1033
00:53:40,199 --> 00:53:42,800
Speaker 2: Baldwin's just bleeding into a cup. I mean, that's probably

1034
00:53:42,800 --> 00:53:46,519
why that one army was unstoppable, which was the Saint Lazarus.

1035
00:53:47,239 --> 00:53:50,880
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh my god, it'd be so fucking funny if

1036
00:53:50,920 --> 00:53:53,199
you're just like, wait, that'd be a great scene in

1037
00:53:53,320 --> 00:53:56,519
the Zombie Night movie. Is It's just like, I'll defeat you,

1038
00:53:56,519 --> 00:53:59,519
you wretch you. It doesn't matter if your sword hits

1039
00:53:59,559 --> 00:54:01,400
me here you're weak. And then he's just like, it

1040
00:54:01,440 --> 00:54:05,559
doesn't matter if you're saw it hits me. He drags

1041
00:54:05,599 --> 00:54:09,039
it across his arm, and the guys just like then

1042
00:54:09,039 --> 00:54:09,440
they fight.

1043
00:54:10,719 --> 00:54:12,559
Speaker 2: Not having enough men to launch an offensive for the

1044
00:54:12,599 --> 00:54:17,480
retreating Muslims, bob Win decided to fortify the Domoscene frontier.

1045
00:54:18,320 --> 00:54:20,400
The Templars convinced him to build a castle on the

1046
00:54:20,480 --> 00:54:24,800
Upper Jordan River. He was reluctant, though, because the Franks

1047
00:54:24,840 --> 00:54:28,760
promised not to mark that part of the border. After

1048
00:54:28,840 --> 00:54:32,239
protests of local Muslims, Celadein offered money to bob Win

1049
00:54:32,320 --> 00:54:35,360
in exchange to abort the construction of that fort, but

1050
00:54:35,400 --> 00:54:39,840
the king refused. I'm gonna help be here, but he's

1051
00:54:39,880 --> 00:54:47,840
gonna pay him, right, It's like, uh.

1052
00:54:45,280 --> 00:54:49,360
Speaker 1: He's that funding to build to then defeat him. Yeah,

1053
00:54:49,400 --> 00:54:50,280
different situations.

1054
00:54:50,280 --> 00:54:55,400
Speaker 2: He's your own money. That sucks so that he couldn't

1055
00:54:55,440 --> 00:54:58,960
pursue him. That's how that's how you know, that's how

1056
00:54:58,960 --> 00:55:01,679
you break country. That's how you break an army back

1057
00:55:01,679 --> 00:55:04,079
then all the way up to even fairly modern times.

1058
00:55:04,119 --> 00:55:07,239
Like I don't know if people know this, but even

1059
00:55:07,280 --> 00:55:12,000
though Gettysburg was like a huge victory, Lincoln was fucking

1060
00:55:13,039 --> 00:55:17,280
furious as they then follow me didn't Meat, didn't follow Lee.

1061
00:55:18,039 --> 00:55:21,320
He was like, what are you doing that? He's got

1062
00:55:21,400 --> 00:55:24,039
nothing left. But Mead was like I don't know. I

1063
00:55:24,079 --> 00:55:25,719
don't want to walk into a trap.

1064
00:55:25,440 --> 00:55:29,920
Speaker 1: And like you just killed most of them, kill the rest.

1065
00:55:31,119 --> 00:55:34,079
Speaker 2: In April eleven, seventy nine, Balbwin intended round up sheep

1066
00:55:34,119 --> 00:55:39,920
passing from Damascus to been nice because soldiers got to eat.

1067
00:55:40,599 --> 00:55:41,719
Soldiers gotta eat.

1068
00:55:41,960 --> 00:55:44,880
Speaker 1: Need protein. You want your army getting their gains.

1069
00:55:45,719 --> 00:55:50,239
Speaker 2: Saludine's nephew, Frek Shah was sent to investigate the king's movement,

1070
00:55:50,280 --> 00:55:54,760
but suddenly ran into him during this sheep herding, and

1071
00:55:54,800 --> 00:55:59,639
a skirmish followed weeks later, Baldwin rode out to intercept

1072
00:55:59,679 --> 00:56:03,559
ar Aids in Beirut in Sa'dan, and in June, Solide's

1073
00:56:03,599 --> 00:56:08,639
raiding party routed Baldwin's. The king was on horsed and

1074
00:56:08,719 --> 00:56:10,920
bald BOMs carried to safety on a night's back because

1075
00:56:10,920 --> 00:56:12,320
he could not remount on his own.

1076
00:56:12,519 --> 00:56:14,599
Speaker 1: Yeah, well so he got He got hit.

1077
00:56:15,280 --> 00:56:20,039
Speaker 2: Later that night. The whole time, it's just like, oh.

1078
00:56:20,079 --> 00:56:22,440
Speaker 1: God, go faster, you fucking horse.

1079
00:56:22,760 --> 00:56:25,599
Speaker 2: You know you're the king, but uh, can you back

1080
00:56:25,639 --> 00:56:29,599
off a little bit? Hey man? He just drags him, yeah,

1081
00:56:29,599 --> 00:56:33,599
with a rope. Not try to be ablest or nothing,

1082
00:56:33,679 --> 00:56:38,519
but please don't touch me so much. My life I'm

1083
00:56:38,519 --> 00:56:41,440
pretty sure my life depends on it. In the Winner

1084
00:56:41,440 --> 00:56:44,719
of eleven seventy seven and eleven seventy eight, the king's

1085
00:56:44,920 --> 00:56:49,599
widowed sister gives birth to the son of William the Longsword,

1086
00:56:50,000 --> 00:56:53,519
and they name him Baldwin after the king. Oh, a

1087
00:56:53,599 --> 00:56:57,159
year of official morning for the father's child had passed

1088
00:56:57,760 --> 00:57:01,360
and it was time for her to get hitched up again. Right.

1089
00:57:01,880 --> 00:57:02,960
That is nice that, you know.

1090
00:57:03,000 --> 00:57:07,440
Speaker 1: They're like, hey, no one driller for a year and

1091
00:57:07,440 --> 00:57:07,800
and died.

1092
00:57:08,280 --> 00:57:10,440
Speaker 2: Yeah, need some time wait for the kid. Too, just

1093
00:57:10,480 --> 00:57:18,559
in decent now another Baldwin, Baldwin of Abilene. He was

1094
00:57:19,199 --> 00:57:22,920
very much entertaining the prospects of marrying the other Baldwin sister.

1095
00:57:23,920 --> 00:57:27,119
It's like, I'm a Baldwin, You're a Baldwin. Could you

1096
00:57:27,159 --> 00:57:29,400
hook up with a chick that had your sister's name?

1097
00:57:30,159 --> 00:57:30,559
Speaker 1: Taylor?

1098
00:57:31,039 --> 00:57:35,199
Speaker 2: Yeah, Taylor Swift? Okay, yeah, yeah, Okay.

1099
00:57:36,159 --> 00:57:38,039
Speaker 1: I have never hooked up with a girl that has

1100
00:57:38,039 --> 00:57:41,159
had my sister's name. To my knowledge, I have forgotten names.

1101
00:57:41,360 --> 00:57:43,880
Speaker 2: I have not to this point. But I have hooked.

1102
00:57:43,679 --> 00:57:47,440
Speaker 1: Up that I'm aware of often. I dated a girl

1103
00:57:47,519 --> 00:57:51,559
named Mary for two years, and that's my mom's name.

1104
00:57:51,880 --> 00:57:56,039
Speaker 2: Okay, so hard to find a Margaret his days. I

1105
00:57:56,039 --> 00:57:59,599
don't know that I haven't met like two margaret's my age.

1106
00:58:00,480 --> 00:58:02,440
In fact, like i've.

1107
00:58:03,800 --> 00:58:06,760
Speaker 1: Aside from my own wife, the person I've had sex

1108
00:58:06,800 --> 00:58:10,039
with the most the same name as my mom.

1109
00:58:11,360 --> 00:58:14,119
Speaker 2: Now our Baldwin Balbin the fourth contemplates her marrying the

1110
00:58:14,199 --> 00:58:16,639
Duke of Burgundy and actually writes to the King of

1111
00:58:16,639 --> 00:58:20,079
France offer in his proposition. But during the Holy Week

1112
00:58:20,119 --> 00:58:24,400
in eleven eighty, the Prince of Antioch in the Count

1113
00:58:24,440 --> 00:58:28,239
of Tripoli march with their armies to Jerusalem. It is

1114
00:58:28,280 --> 00:58:30,639
most likely their intention was to force the king to

1115
00:58:30,719 --> 00:58:34,440
have his sister Mary Baldwin of Abilene and then to

1116
00:58:34,559 --> 00:58:35,960
abdicate give up power.

1117
00:58:36,719 --> 00:58:40,320
Speaker 1: Oh dude, so Ibelin is the bad guys. Orlando Blooms

1118
00:58:40,320 --> 00:58:43,719
the bad guy right out? De Chatillon is the good guy.

1119
00:58:44,280 --> 00:58:47,320
Speaker 2: The king had never approved of the other Baldwin's ambition

1120
00:58:47,440 --> 00:58:49,760
to marry his sister, and though he did not wish

1121
00:58:49,840 --> 00:58:53,000
to abdicate, he was not keen on having terms forced

1122
00:58:53,000 --> 00:58:59,679
on him. Baldwin acted decisively before his Kinsman armies reached Jerusalem.

1123
00:59:00,119 --> 00:59:01,719
He arranged for his sister.

1124
00:59:01,480 --> 00:59:05,639
Speaker 1: To marry a knight, guy of Lizon.

1125
00:59:06,400 --> 00:59:11,400
Speaker 2: First off, they're French, so it's gee, gee gee, it's

1126
00:59:11,480 --> 00:59:13,199
this guy. That's how they say. I'm just gonna refer

1127
00:59:13,239 --> 00:59:15,159
to this guy. Hey guy, Hey gee.

1128
00:59:15,239 --> 00:59:16,760
Speaker 1: He's gonna marry some night named guy.

1129
00:59:17,320 --> 00:59:20,719
Speaker 2: Gay. He's gonna marry some guy. He's gonna marry some guy. Yeah,

1130
00:59:21,159 --> 00:59:28,480
just a dude. Raymond and uh Boheman had no option

1131
00:59:28,559 --> 00:59:30,440
but to accept the marriage, and the coup was foiled.

1132
00:59:31,440 --> 00:59:34,239
They're like, all right, uh, you got us here. You

1133
00:59:34,320 --> 00:59:37,239
already went through with the marriage. Yeah, can't can't break

1134
00:59:37,360 --> 00:59:41,480
up that holy where Sanktimony? Should I name my kid guy?

1135
00:59:41,760 --> 00:59:45,079
If it's a boy, why not guy Fox? No? This

1136
00:59:45,159 --> 00:59:48,679
guy sucks, I know, but I just want to I

1137
00:59:48,840 --> 00:59:54,440
might do that. I'm gonna call him GHI now Baldwin again.

1138
00:59:54,480 --> 00:59:56,559
He's always trying to give up hour. He's like down

1139
00:59:56,599 --> 00:59:57,119
to abdicate.

1140
00:59:57,199 --> 01:00:00,760
Speaker 1: Yeah, he's like, please, somebody please worthy of this, Like at.

1141
01:00:00,559 --> 01:00:05,719
Speaker 2: My foot is just hanging on by attendon. But he

1142
01:00:05,840 --> 01:00:09,119
can't because there's this deep rift with his court. He

1143
01:00:09,199 --> 01:00:12,079
had the faction from his father's side and he had

1144
01:00:12,119 --> 01:00:15,639
his mother's and they're kind of clashing. They're always at

1145
01:00:15,679 --> 01:00:16,360
war with each other.

1146
01:00:16,440 --> 01:00:19,760
Speaker 1: Can you imagine having just like eight types of cancer,

1147
01:00:19,800 --> 01:00:21,800
but you still have to go to work because everyone

1148
01:00:21,800 --> 01:00:24,760
else at the office is being such a dick. Everyone

1149
01:00:24,760 --> 01:00:27,320
in your Famili's just fighting.

1150
01:00:28,960 --> 01:00:30,440
Speaker 2: Like all you want to do is go.

1151
01:00:30,960 --> 01:00:35,760
Speaker 1: It's just Middle Ages. It just can't in a lot

1152
01:00:35,800 --> 01:00:37,039
of these family problems.

1153
01:00:37,079 --> 01:00:40,440
Speaker 2: Baldwin proposes a to year troops with Seladeen, who gladly

1154
01:00:40,440 --> 01:00:44,119
accepts it in order to campaign freely in northern Syria.

1155
01:00:43,679 --> 01:00:46,679
Speaker 1: Ah to go fight other Muslims or to fight other

1156
01:00:46,880 --> 01:00:48,519
Christians both okay, yeah.

1157
01:00:48,480 --> 01:00:53,119
Speaker 2: Just conquer, Yeah, yeah, Balbwin sent his uncle in chief,

1158
01:00:53,159 --> 01:00:56,679
Minister Jocelyn, to assure the Byzantine Court that Jerusalem still

1159
01:00:56,679 --> 01:01:00,960
needed their protection. During Jocelyn's absence from mid eleven eighty

1160
01:01:00,960 --> 01:01:04,559
to eleven eighty one, the full burden of government felt

1161
01:01:04,559 --> 01:01:05,079
in these.

1162
01:01:05,000 --> 01:01:06,000
Speaker 1: Shoulders of the.

1163
01:01:07,599 --> 01:01:11,639
Speaker 2: Now deteriorating health king, and he relied chiefly on his

1164
01:01:11,639 --> 01:01:15,039
mother during this period. Well, like you weren't there for

1165
01:01:15,079 --> 01:01:17,360
me before. Time to make up for it, Hey, mom,

1166
01:01:17,559 --> 01:01:21,280
he didn't teach me how to but I don't even

1167
01:01:21,360 --> 01:01:23,400
know what they would teach them back then, because not

1168
01:01:23,480 --> 01:01:25,559
riding a bike or anything. But like, so you're gonna

1169
01:01:25,599 --> 01:01:32,840
have to handle these horrible geopolitical and intercurt situations. Bald

1170
01:01:32,880 --> 01:01:35,639
Win at first two is like, all right, this guy,

1171
01:01:35,679 --> 01:01:38,960
this night guy, ghee, if you want to call him

1172
01:01:39,159 --> 01:01:43,719
night gee. I guess I'll start to kind of prep

1173
01:01:43,840 --> 01:01:48,360
him a little bit to be my successor just in case. No, no,

1174
01:01:48,480 --> 01:01:51,519
just because like I see no other options.

1175
01:01:51,239 --> 01:01:52,280
Speaker 1: Right right, Well that's what's saying.

1176
01:01:52,320 --> 01:01:54,079
Speaker 2: Just in case. Like it's like I guess, yeah, So

1177
01:01:54,159 --> 01:01:57,360
he marries off his half sister from you know, his

1178
01:01:57,360 --> 01:02:02,800
stepmom's marriage, Okay, because his dad rem and stuff. So

1179
01:02:02,880 --> 01:02:04,800
he she he she needs to get out of the picture.

1180
01:02:05,480 --> 01:02:10,280
His actual sister and this guy guy, they need to

1181
01:02:10,320 --> 01:02:14,119
take full power, you know, when I'm gone or whenever

1182
01:02:14,159 --> 01:02:15,360
I get sick, I get.

1183
01:02:15,320 --> 01:02:19,719
Speaker 1: And it needs to be like on, like no one

1184
01:02:19,719 --> 01:02:21,639
can veto it, like no one can challenge it, right,

1185
01:02:21,679 --> 01:02:24,119
Like it needs to be like completely legitimized, like everyone's

1186
01:02:24,159 --> 01:02:26,000
like okay, fuck like he said it.

1187
01:02:26,159 --> 01:02:31,159
Speaker 2: Yes, okay. But he's not the most respected. He's you know,

1188
01:02:31,400 --> 01:02:33,719
not a great night. He's a pretty shitty night. Actually

1189
01:02:33,760 --> 01:02:36,199
not good in battle. That doesn't really have the respect

1190
01:02:36,239 --> 01:02:37,880
of his boys. The high court hates him.

1191
01:02:38,000 --> 01:02:40,280
Speaker 1: Here's the thing though, Here's the thing though, and this

1192
01:02:40,360 --> 01:02:41,719
is where they get it wrong. It's where a lot

1193
01:02:41,760 --> 01:02:42,519
of people get it wrong.

1194
01:02:42,599 --> 01:02:43,639
Speaker 2: Right.

1195
01:02:44,800 --> 01:02:50,719
Speaker 1: Bad players make great coaches. It's true, right, yeah, look

1196
01:02:50,719 --> 01:02:54,440
at look at how Michael Jordan ran his franchises. Fucking

1197
01:02:54,519 --> 01:02:57,159
dog shit. The guy could couldn't draft for fucking shit.

1198
01:02:57,360 --> 01:03:01,000
He was just drunk one day decided Frank commenced was

1199
01:03:01,039 --> 01:03:03,199
fucking rad because he watched him in the Final Four

1200
01:03:03,280 --> 01:03:06,159
where granted he was awesome in college, and it's like,

1201
01:03:06,199 --> 01:03:09,599
I gotta draft this guy over every single better athlete

1202
01:03:09,599 --> 01:03:14,199
in the whole fucking like. And there's like innumerable examples

1203
01:03:14,199 --> 01:03:18,400
for every like the amount of times a very good athlete,

1204
01:03:18,679 --> 01:03:20,400
like a very a player with a very good career

1205
01:03:20,440 --> 01:03:22,679
has been a shitty coach, endless examples.

1206
01:03:22,920 --> 01:03:24,719
Speaker 2: But a lot of the great coaches, you see, they

1207
01:03:25,039 --> 01:03:27,920
were bad at it at the sport. They have the

1208
01:03:27,960 --> 01:03:28,480
mind for it.

1209
01:03:28,559 --> 01:03:31,559
Speaker 1: Yeah, they have the mind, and they understand. You learn

1210
01:03:31,599 --> 01:03:34,159
through failure, right, you understand things. So I actually I'm

1211
01:03:34,199 --> 01:03:36,639
in on on guy. I'm in on guy.

1212
01:03:38,079 --> 01:03:41,280
Speaker 2: Now. Baldwin's truce with Saladeen was due to expire May eleventh,

1213
01:03:41,320 --> 01:03:45,639
eighty two, but was broken mid eleven eighty one, beat

1214
01:03:45,920 --> 01:03:49,519
by Raynal, who sees a merchant caravan on his way

1215
01:03:49,559 --> 01:03:54,159
from Egypt to Damascus. Raynall ignored the king's request to

1216
01:03:54,280 --> 01:03:57,880
make restitution to Saladeen, who was then preparing to annex

1217
01:03:58,920 --> 01:04:06,000
Zengid ruled Aleppo. So the Zengids are also Muslim other Muslims. Yeah.

1218
01:04:07,000 --> 01:04:10,079
In July, Baldwin march to relieve the Muslim siege of

1219
01:04:10,599 --> 01:04:18,360
Bessam and his outnumbered army one the Battle of Breathing Heavy,

1220
01:04:18,400 --> 01:04:24,679
like really really fucking sick coffin. But he's still on

1221
01:04:24,719 --> 01:04:26,920
the front lines he's still at the battle. He's still

1222
01:04:26,960 --> 01:04:29,360
leading his men, doing his fucking job.

1223
01:04:30,039 --> 01:04:32,760
Speaker 1: Just to continue the basketball Jordan analogy, every game is

1224
01:04:32,800 --> 01:04:33,320
a flu game.

1225
01:04:33,360 --> 01:04:38,000
Speaker 2: For Bold, every game is a fucking flu game. Yeah.

1226
01:04:38,039 --> 01:04:42,079
The defeated Assaultan then besieged Beirut, while another army from

1227
01:04:42,159 --> 01:04:45,519
Egypt attacked the south of the kingdom. Baldwin knew that

1228
01:04:45,599 --> 01:04:49,679
he was being provoked into dividing his forces. Deciding that

1229
01:04:49,679 --> 01:04:53,199
Beirut was the greater strategic importance, he ignored the southern

1230
01:04:53,280 --> 01:04:56,599
attack and moved his troops to tire.

1231
01:04:56,800 --> 01:04:59,639
Speaker 1: There really is like no point in fighting off an

1232
01:04:59,719 --> 01:05:03,719
army that you know can't hold what they're taking. Yeah,

1233
01:05:03,800 --> 01:05:06,079
like we'll get it, betack, Yeah whatever, Oh, have fun

1234
01:05:06,320 --> 01:05:07,760
from there here.

1235
01:05:07,360 --> 01:05:10,800
Speaker 2: The assistance of the Italian Maritime Republics and lifting' sa audience,

1236
01:05:10,920 --> 01:05:14,320
naval block of Bea route so Venice and shit like that, which,

1237
01:05:14,360 --> 01:05:16,519
by the way, I meant to say earlier in terms

1238
01:05:16,559 --> 01:05:19,800
of them going to the Byzantines for the Eastern Roman Empire.

1239
01:05:19,480 --> 01:05:23,599
Speaker 1: For naval support. This is at the time where I

1240
01:05:23,719 --> 01:05:29,480
believe they are the only ones that have a fun

1241
01:05:29,519 --> 01:05:33,960
little thing called Greek fire, So they basically have napalm

1242
01:05:34,000 --> 01:05:37,760
and no one else has it, and it fucks other

1243
01:05:38,159 --> 01:05:42,639
wooden boats up. I think it is before the Crusades,

1244
01:05:42,679 --> 01:05:45,679
but when the caliphates were really popping off in the

1245
01:05:45,679 --> 01:05:48,800
first place, like the Umiad Caliphate, they got you know,

1246
01:05:49,039 --> 01:05:51,320
people talk about like their Turks getting to Constantinople, the

1247
01:05:51,280 --> 01:05:54,800
Crusaders second constant Nople, but the I think the Umiad

1248
01:05:54,800 --> 01:05:58,079
Caliphate got all the fucking way to constant Nople just

1249
01:05:58,079 --> 01:06:01,039
because they were a goddamn human tidal way. And uh,

1250
01:06:01,760 --> 01:06:05,599
they beat them off with Greek fire, specifically because you

1251
01:06:05,639 --> 01:06:08,519
gotta hit constant with noble at least partially by sea.

1252
01:06:08,599 --> 01:06:10,840
And they had a great navy at the time. The

1253
01:06:11,000 --> 01:06:14,840
Calife did because they were just militarily insanely good at everything,

1254
01:06:15,159 --> 01:06:18,239
and they got to constant Nople and they just literally

1255
01:06:18,360 --> 01:06:21,280
lit their ships on fucking fire. Greek fire is wow,

1256
01:06:21,400 --> 01:06:23,280
because they just lost how to make it.

1257
01:06:23,519 --> 01:06:24,039
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1258
01:06:24,119 --> 01:06:27,960
Speaker 1: So actually here's a great example. Greek fire is wildfire

1259
01:06:27,960 --> 01:06:29,639
from gaming. Everyone knows that.

1260
01:06:30,679 --> 01:06:32,960
Speaker 2: You know that. I don't just say I don't know

1261
01:06:33,000 --> 01:06:34,800
if all the listeners know that. We've discussed it a

1262
01:06:34,800 --> 01:06:37,480
couple of times. Okay, well I don't know, but yeah,

1263
01:06:37,519 --> 01:06:40,239
they just fucking it's not there anymore. It's just yeah,

1264
01:06:40,239 --> 01:06:41,400
they just lost the recipe.

1265
01:06:42,320 --> 01:06:45,320
Speaker 1: And it was like the type of shit to where

1266
01:06:45,440 --> 01:06:47,519
it just wouldn't I think it was a lot like

1267
01:06:47,599 --> 01:06:50,280
napalm where it's just like you're just you just like

1268
01:06:50,320 --> 01:06:51,880
can't put it out or something, you know what I mean,

1269
01:06:51,920 --> 01:06:54,440
Like it just sticks to you and it's just like

1270
01:06:54,719 --> 01:06:57,719
doesn't stop burning. It's fucking crazy burns on water.

1271
01:06:57,960 --> 01:07:02,199
Speaker 2: Yeah, I mean, it's it was insane. Saudian abandons de

1272
01:07:02,280 --> 01:07:06,280
siege declines to make a truce, wearing Baldwin and his advisors.

1273
01:07:06,800 --> 01:07:10,320
He proceeds to then go up north to fight the Zengids,

1274
01:07:10,840 --> 01:07:14,880
thereby expanding his realm. Why while Baldwin led an attack

1275
01:07:14,960 --> 01:07:21,760
on Saladin's Demoscene territory, then on Basra before finally lay siege,

1276
01:07:21,800 --> 01:07:23,679
you capture and caved south.

1277
01:07:24,320 --> 01:07:27,639
Speaker 1: Wait, Baldwin hip hop hit Basra. Yeah, that is a

1278
01:07:27,679 --> 01:07:31,280
long way away from Jerusalem. That's in Iraq. That's like

1279
01:07:31,320 --> 01:07:34,599
on the fucking Persian Gulf. Yeah, you gotta you gotta

1280
01:07:34,679 --> 01:07:39,679
hit this too where he's not but he's that's that's

1281
01:07:39,719 --> 01:07:42,800
a long just a long way away from where they were,

1282
01:07:43,320 --> 01:07:47,039
Like Basra is I mean, you gotta cross the whole

1283
01:07:47,039 --> 01:07:47,639
fucking desert.

1284
01:07:47,719 --> 01:07:50,519
Speaker 2: Yeah, dude, he's got fucking shooters everywhere. He's the king

1285
01:07:50,559 --> 01:07:54,360
of Jerusalem. That's a lot. It's along you call your banners. Yeah, yeah,

1286
01:07:54,519 --> 01:07:56,880
I mean fair enough. I'm gonna just do the.

1287
01:08:00,639 --> 01:08:04,840
Speaker 1: It's uh, ironically though, you know, it's weird about this.

1288
01:08:04,840 --> 01:08:08,280
Speaker 2: This is just how big America is. It's only a

1289
01:08:08,320 --> 01:08:11,440
fourteen hour drive from Jerusalem, not far.

1290
01:08:12,360 --> 01:08:16,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, And actually this is what's crazy too.

1291
01:08:16,800 --> 01:08:20,880
Speaker 2: So it's only a fifteen day walk. So driving to

1292
01:08:21,079 --> 01:08:25,439
Tennessee from Austin. Yeah, yes, America is huge. Man.

1293
01:08:25,960 --> 01:08:29,399
Speaker 1: Also though, so fifteen day walk, I'd say for an army,

1294
01:08:29,520 --> 01:08:30,119
just double it.

1295
01:08:30,399 --> 01:08:31,880
Speaker 2: So take it. It won't only take a month to

1296
01:08:31,920 --> 01:08:32,479
get to Basra.

1297
01:08:33,399 --> 01:08:36,199
Speaker 1: That is still a long way compared to comparatively to

1298
01:08:36,359 --> 01:08:39,439
like places there like Bay Root or something right like

1299
01:08:39,479 --> 01:08:41,239
Bay Route. You get there in fucking eight days.

1300
01:08:41,880 --> 01:08:44,479
Speaker 2: The winner of eleven eighty two eleven eighty three. He

1301
01:08:44,479 --> 01:08:47,720
agrees on a strategy with his council and they attack

1302
01:08:48,399 --> 01:08:52,680
Damascus again. He threatens to destroy a mosque in Daria,

1303
01:08:53,079 --> 01:08:57,159
but local Christians convince him probably don't do that, Like, yeah,

1304
01:08:57,159 --> 01:08:59,800
that's smart of them, because they're like, hey, they're gonna

1305
01:08:59,840 --> 01:09:00,359
fuck our shit.

1306
01:09:00,479 --> 01:09:03,520
Speaker 1: You're gonna leave at some point and we live here

1307
01:09:03,920 --> 01:09:09,279
and ah, they're so mean already.

1308
01:09:10,279 --> 01:09:11,920
Speaker 2: That's a cool thing about bald when he will take

1309
01:09:11,920 --> 01:09:12,840
advice from other people.

1310
01:09:12,960 --> 01:09:16,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, they're like he'll ask like locals.

1311
01:09:16,079 --> 01:09:18,960
Speaker 2: Yeah, I would think I would just like to not see.

1312
01:09:19,359 --> 01:09:24,399
Speaker 1: It's like the the Japanese during the Siege of Manila.

1313
01:09:24,600 --> 01:09:26,279
It's just like, I would just like to not see

1314
01:09:26,399 --> 01:09:28,920
Muslim soldiers toss my baby in the air and then

1315
01:09:29,000 --> 01:09:29,960
catch them on a sword.

1316
01:09:31,520 --> 01:09:35,399
Speaker 2: And that's going to happen if you destroyed this mosque,

1317
01:09:35,800 --> 01:09:39,600
for the love of God, leave it up now. Things

1318
01:09:39,640 --> 01:09:42,079
kind of fall apart in eleven eighty three as bad

1319
01:09:42,119 --> 01:09:47,199
Winds starts to lose the ability to walk unsupported and

1320
01:09:47,359 --> 01:09:50,039
use his hands. He can't use his hands. They've become

1321
01:09:50,159 --> 01:09:54,880
essentially just as useless. They just kind of crumble inside

1322
01:09:54,880 --> 01:09:59,880
themselves because of an inability to blink to his co

1323
01:10:00,000 --> 01:10:01,680
when he had dries up and he becomes blind.

1324
01:10:01,920 --> 01:10:08,039
Speaker 1: Oh good lord, he's still blink How does it even happen? Yeah,

1325
01:10:08,439 --> 01:10:14,680
it's tough, so he loses control. I get so just

1326
01:10:14,840 --> 01:10:17,600
that just means like the muscles die right because you

1327
01:10:17,640 --> 01:10:23,239
blink involuntarily, like I can do the blinking, but also like.

1328
01:10:24,920 --> 01:10:29,479
Speaker 2: It's like breathing. Yeah, but now he's blind because the

1329
01:10:29,479 --> 01:10:31,439
corn is just dries out. Yeah, so he just that

1330
01:10:31,479 --> 01:10:32,239
thing just dies.

1331
01:10:32,439 --> 01:10:34,680
Speaker 1: It's funny that the it's actually weird to me that

1332
01:10:34,760 --> 01:10:38,159
his eyelids go fucking dead, but they stay up.

1333
01:10:39,079 --> 01:10:41,399
Speaker 2: Shouldn't they have? Shouldn't they have drooped.

1334
01:10:41,560 --> 01:10:43,560
Speaker 1: Or just folded over over his eyes?

1335
01:10:44,039 --> 01:10:45,920
Speaker 2: I don't know. I don't know how eyes work.

1336
01:10:46,279 --> 01:10:49,039
Speaker 1: I don't either, apparently. And by the way, if they

1337
01:10:49,079 --> 01:10:52,479
did droop, which is what should have happened, you have

1338
01:10:52,520 --> 01:10:55,600
a royal blinker. Or even if they didn't, if they

1339
01:10:55,600 --> 01:10:57,439
stayed up, you have a royal Just have a royal

1340
01:10:57,439 --> 01:10:59,199
blinker right.

1341
01:10:59,600 --> 01:11:04,239
Speaker 2: Somebody behind you and yes, blink me. The king then

1342
01:11:04,319 --> 01:11:08,199
developed a life threatening fever. He was with his mother

1343
01:11:08,399 --> 01:11:12,399
at nearby Nazareth, having summoned the High Court to his bedside,

1344
01:11:12,439 --> 01:11:14,640
Bobwin and trusted the government to his brother in law

1345
01:11:15,039 --> 01:11:18,319
Gee or Guy as you were saying, who was next

1346
01:11:18,319 --> 01:11:21,560
in line to succeed in Guy's appointment to regency was

1347
01:11:21,600 --> 01:11:24,800
meant to be permanent. Balbwin retained only the.

1348
01:11:24,720 --> 01:11:28,199
Speaker 1: Royal title and authority over the city of Jerusalem, but

1349
01:11:28,600 --> 01:11:31,960
he had guys swear that while Balbin lived, he would

1350
01:11:32,000 --> 01:11:35,199
not make himself king or alienate parts of his royal family.

1351
01:11:35,720 --> 01:11:38,880
So he's like, can you just be chill until it's

1352
01:11:38,960 --> 01:11:42,439
not my fucking problem anymore? And by that I mean death.

1353
01:11:42,319 --> 01:11:45,000
Speaker 2: Like you have all the power, just don't be a

1354
01:11:45,039 --> 01:11:49,000
dick about it. Yeah, don't try to take my title

1355
01:11:49,600 --> 01:11:51,399
or fuck over my family.

1356
01:11:51,960 --> 01:11:54,680
Speaker 1: That's all he asked. That's all he asked.

1357
01:11:54,800 --> 01:11:58,640
Speaker 2: And by the way, he's in his family. Yes. Now.

1358
01:11:58,840 --> 01:12:02,399
Bobwin recovered on ex actively and returned to Jerusalem, having

1359
01:12:02,439 --> 01:12:05,920
found that the coastal climate suited his health. Baldwin then

1360
01:12:05,960 --> 01:12:09,720
offered Jerusalem to Guy in exchange for Tire. So he

1361
01:12:09,760 --> 01:12:13,279
wanted to just go hang out a tire. Yeah, He's like, hey,

1362
01:12:13,479 --> 01:12:19,840
you get Jerusalem, I'll say tire, okay. Guy refused. He

1363
01:12:19,880 --> 01:12:23,079
said Tire was more lucrative. Uh.

1364
01:12:23,159 --> 01:12:26,199
Speaker 1: Probably true. To be honest, Tire is like an ancient

1365
01:12:26,239 --> 01:12:29,079
port city. Tire is like a Phoenician city. The Tire

1366
01:12:29,159 --> 01:12:32,199
has been a major probably still is. I don't really

1367
01:12:32,279 --> 01:12:34,680
know though, but Tire was a major Mediterranean port from

1368
01:12:35,079 --> 01:12:38,640
pre Roman Empire to then and beyond it.

1369
01:12:39,880 --> 01:12:43,920
Speaker 2: So this insults Baldwin, He's like, dude, come on, oh fuck,

1370
01:12:44,039 --> 01:12:47,159
I'm really dumb. So uh.

1371
01:12:47,920 --> 01:12:54,039
Speaker 1: Raynald de Chatillon is Brendan Gleeson in Kingdom of Heaven,

1372
01:12:54,319 --> 01:12:58,159
who's like the secondary bad guy. Ghee is the main

1373
01:12:58,239 --> 01:13:04,720
bad guy. Fel I completely fucked that up, my bad.

1374
01:13:06,079 --> 01:13:06,279
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1375
01:13:06,399 --> 01:13:08,720
Speaker 1: I think he also gets his throat slashed in.

1376
01:13:09,000 --> 01:13:09,119
Speaker 2: Uh.

1377
01:13:09,239 --> 01:13:14,319
Speaker 1: Brendan Gleeson does yeah, yeah, yeah, because they're like, they

1378
01:13:14,359 --> 01:13:17,720
offer ghee water and Raynhall is.

1379
01:13:17,680 --> 01:13:19,159
Speaker 2: Like, I have a fucking dasty I'll take it.

1380
01:13:19,159 --> 01:13:22,079
Speaker 1: I'm a big snappy pick and then they're like they

1381
01:13:22,239 --> 01:13:23,199
then they stick them.

1382
01:13:23,039 --> 01:13:27,039
Speaker 2: Like a pig. Yeah. Saudian just goes yeah yeah, which

1383
01:13:27,039 --> 01:13:29,439
again I don't think historically accurate. I really Scott China

1384
01:13:29,840 --> 01:13:36,680
takes liberties into his own hands. You know, look Blackhawk down,

1385
01:13:37,479 --> 01:13:43,399
hyper accurate, Gladiator Robin Hood, Kingdom of Heaven, Nah so much,

1386
01:13:45,079 --> 01:13:49,359
but they look they feel right. What in the Baldwin's

1387
01:13:49,359 --> 01:13:54,119
half sister, Isabella and Humphrey, the fourth of Tehran was

1388
01:13:54,119 --> 01:13:58,159
celebrated in Karak in late eleven eighty three. Uh.

1389
01:13:58,399 --> 01:14:00,479
Speaker 1: I can tell you how to pronounce that only because

1390
01:14:00,520 --> 01:14:05,359
of the movie. I'm not a smart person's only Carrack Kerrick. Yeah, yeah,

1391
01:14:05,359 --> 01:14:10,159
but he got Carock sounds better it does. What a

1392
01:14:10,239 --> 01:14:13,600
perfect opportunity for Saladin to attack. This is a battle

1393
01:14:13,600 --> 01:14:16,079
in the movie during the festivities. Yeah, this is this

1394
01:14:16,159 --> 01:14:18,000
is a this is portrayed.

1395
01:14:18,439 --> 01:14:21,560
Speaker 2: He lays siege to the castle, hoping to capture the

1396
01:14:21,640 --> 01:14:24,319
king's half sister and her husband.

1397
01:14:25,279 --> 01:14:28,520
Speaker 1: But you know that boy ball still got it mm hm.

1398
01:14:29,479 --> 01:14:32,199
Speaker 2: Retired king had gathered a council in Jerusalem to inform

1399
01:14:32,279 --> 01:14:34,520
them about the government of the kingdom. When the news

1400
01:14:34,800 --> 01:14:38,239
about the siege had reached it, he immediately dismissed Guy

1401
01:14:38,520 --> 01:14:40,880
from his regency. I'm like, all right, I'm taking power

1402
01:14:40,920 --> 01:14:43,399
back to Yeah, you're fucking ass, You're useless, you suck.

1403
01:14:45,239 --> 01:14:49,800
And He's like, I gotta go ride. I can't entrust

1404
01:14:49,840 --> 01:14:53,960
you with our band to you know, get my fucking

1405
01:14:53,960 --> 01:14:58,600
family back. Guy's removal from the regency was effectively disinheritance

1406
01:14:58,880 --> 01:15:03,880
of the position at the council's insistence. Delibrations about succession

1407
01:15:03,880 --> 01:15:08,720
plan followed the proposal of the king's mother that his

1408
01:15:08,880 --> 01:15:13,760
sister's son, Baldwin, would be made co king and not

1409
01:15:13,840 --> 01:15:18,680
his father. Okay, so like, Guy, you're out. You're kid though, Yeah,

1410
01:15:18,800 --> 01:15:21,399
little Baldwin. He's got the blood. He's got the blood.

1411
01:15:21,680 --> 01:15:25,880
We're good with him. Okay, fuck you, you're out, fucking dick.

1412
01:15:27,479 --> 01:15:30,279
In late November, Baldwin ordered the lighting of the beacon

1413
01:15:30,399 --> 01:15:33,359
of the Tower David, which may have been the first

1414
01:15:33,520 --> 01:15:36,199
in a chain of such beacons, in order to hearten

1415
01:15:36,239 --> 01:15:42,000
the defenders of the intensely bombarded Carrick gun dog calls

1416
01:15:42,000 --> 01:15:47,479
for aid that what it is. Baldwin accompanied his trips again,

1417
01:15:47,680 --> 01:15:51,359
but having become blind and immobile. This time he went

1418
01:15:51,560 --> 01:15:57,119
in a little slug between two horses. Oh no, he's

1419
01:15:57,159 --> 01:16:01,399
in a baby Bjorn between two horses. His presence was

1420
01:16:01,479 --> 01:16:05,840
essentially to unite the barons together. Even his humiliated brother

1421
01:16:05,880 --> 01:16:08,960
in law led his men. Warned by his scouts about

1422
01:16:08,960 --> 01:16:12,479
the king approach and concerned about having left Egypt unguarded,

1423
01:16:12,680 --> 01:16:15,520
Saladean abandoned the siege on December fourth.

1424
01:16:15,640 --> 01:16:17,520
Speaker 1: This is not so much a flu game as it

1425
01:16:17,600 --> 01:16:24,840
is a late stage Lakemia game. This is Yeah.

1426
01:16:24,920 --> 01:16:28,239
Speaker 2: The question of regency for his nephew troubled Baldwin. The

1427
01:16:28,319 --> 01:16:32,560
only way to ensure that guy could not claim was

1428
01:16:32,600 --> 01:16:36,119
to have his marriage to his sister and old gotta

1429
01:16:36,159 --> 01:16:40,840
run that playbook back but surprisingly his sister kind of

1430
01:16:40,840 --> 01:16:44,439
loved this guy. What oh she actually was like into him. Yeah,

1431
01:16:44,479 --> 01:16:48,479
so she thwarted the plans and refused to appear in court.

1432
01:16:48,880 --> 01:16:51,560
Damn it, yeah, woman, what are you doing? Early in

1433
01:16:51,560 --> 01:16:54,640
eleven eighty four, Baldwin ordered Guy meet with him in Jerusalem.

1434
01:16:54,800 --> 01:16:58,880
Guy declines, So it's poor health. Ironically, it's like, I

1435
01:16:58,920 --> 01:17:03,479
can't show up. I got yeah bad. Hell. So what

1436
01:17:03,520 --> 01:17:09,920
does Baldwin do. He knocks up on the front front gates.

1437
01:17:09,119 --> 01:17:10,319
Speaker 1: Of He rolls up.

1438
01:17:10,920 --> 01:17:13,920
Speaker 2: He goes up to uh Asalon in the company of

1439
01:17:13,960 --> 01:17:16,640
the High Court, and God refused to let him into

1440
01:17:16,680 --> 01:17:19,920
the city. Okay. From the battlements and the towers the

1441
01:17:19,960 --> 01:17:23,720
inhabitants witnessed, the king raised his hand and knocked the gates,

1442
01:17:23,760 --> 01:17:26,880
demanding admission, only for the gates to remain closed. He

1443
01:17:26,960 --> 01:17:29,640
was just like, fuck you, he's let me in, dude,

1444
01:17:30,560 --> 01:17:33,920
I'm your king. That's really funny. The king was welcomed

1445
01:17:33,960 --> 01:17:37,399
in Jaffa, however, where he installed a governor, thereby depriving

1446
01:17:37,680 --> 01:17:40,239
Guy of half of his county. So he's like, all right,

1447
01:17:40,279 --> 01:17:43,760
you're not gonna let me in. Cool, I'm declaring what

1448
01:17:43,840 --> 01:17:46,279
you lord over. They're independent now.

1449
01:17:46,399 --> 01:17:49,560
Speaker 1: Yeah, ah, you thought, oh, you thought this was yours.

1450
01:17:50,600 --> 01:17:54,079
Speaker 2: You thought this part. Imagine if you're just like.

1451
01:17:53,079 --> 01:17:57,600
Speaker 1: Like you try to go to Los Angeles and someone's like, no,

1452
01:17:57,760 --> 01:18:00,880
letting you in, bitch, and but you're in charge of

1453
01:18:00,880 --> 01:18:03,199
the whole fucking country. And so this guy in Los

1454
01:18:03,239 --> 01:18:06,399
Angeles thinks he runs California and you just like slice

1455
01:18:06,439 --> 01:18:09,399
off like San Francisco, Oakland, like all these other like

1456
01:18:09,520 --> 01:18:11,880
rad places, and they're just He's like.

1457
01:18:11,880 --> 01:18:13,880
Speaker 2: Oh, yeah, it's not yours anymore. Nope, it's its own.

1458
01:18:13,960 --> 01:18:18,359
It's its own thing now. To gain support, Baldwin summons

1459
01:18:18,359 --> 01:18:21,520
to the Council to seize Guys Fife on the grounds

1460
01:18:21,560 --> 01:18:26,319
of refusal of the royal summons. The patriarchal Grandmasters begged

1461
01:18:26,319 --> 01:18:29,039
Balbwin to forgive guy in order to avoid a civil war,

1462
01:18:29,880 --> 01:18:33,640
but this was unacceptable to Baldwin. You can't let it go. Yeah,

1463
01:18:33,760 --> 01:18:36,399
he's like, I just I know you want me to

1464
01:18:36,439 --> 01:18:39,399
turn the other cheek. But in no world can a

1465
01:18:39,439 --> 01:18:43,039
king do that. Yeah, and show like that they're not weak.

1466
01:18:43,159 --> 01:18:46,000
Speaker 1: You know what Baldwin should have said, you want me

1467
01:18:46,039 --> 01:18:49,880
to turn the other cheek, sir. And then he turns

1468
01:18:49,920 --> 01:18:52,600
and he goes, I have no cheek, and he's just

1469
01:18:52,640 --> 01:18:55,319
a fucking the skeleton part of his face because he's

1470
01:18:55,359 --> 01:18:58,000
got leopards just drooping off because of the leprosy.

1471
01:18:58,600 --> 01:19:02,039
Speaker 2: I have no cheek to turn. By June he sent

1472
01:19:02,159 --> 01:19:06,600
them some diplomats on a mission to seek aid for

1473
01:19:06,680 --> 01:19:10,039
the kingdom. He informed them by letter that Saladin was

1474
01:19:10,079 --> 01:19:16,520
once more besieging Karak. Again, Saladeen abandoned the siege when the.

1475
01:19:18,039 --> 01:19:21,079
Speaker 1: Our boy just shows back up in his sling between

1476
01:19:21,119 --> 01:19:25,399
the horse. Actually, no, you know what it is. It's

1477
01:19:25,439 --> 01:19:29,439
even sadder than that. It's you know those thing like

1478
01:19:30,800 --> 01:19:33,119
one year old eight month olds get in and they're

1479
01:19:33,119 --> 01:19:35,239
on wheels, and it's like you put him in the

1480
01:19:35,239 --> 01:19:35,840
little thing and.

1481
01:19:35,760 --> 01:19:36,880
Speaker 2: They like run around.

1482
01:19:38,000 --> 01:19:41,439
Speaker 1: That's what That's what King Baldwin is in with two horses.

1483
01:19:44,640 --> 01:19:47,239
That would be such an easy target. I would just

1484
01:19:47,279 --> 01:19:49,279
if I have solid and I'd be like just someone

1485
01:19:49,600 --> 01:19:52,000
for his own sake, just put him off, put them

1486
01:19:52,000 --> 01:19:53,239
a fucking arrow in his heart.

1487
01:19:54,640 --> 01:19:58,920
Speaker 2: In late eleven eighty four, a shock to learn that guy,

1488
01:19:59,119 --> 01:20:05,359
in return for taking half of his fifetom just massacred

1489
01:20:05,720 --> 01:20:06,840
a bunch of people.

1490
01:20:07,720 --> 01:20:09,479
Speaker 1: Christians, yea, his own people.

1491
01:20:10,159 --> 01:20:17,399
Speaker 2: Good Lord and Darren. They were under royal protection. And

1492
01:20:17,479 --> 01:20:21,840
they were also providing Baldwin information about the Egyptian movements,

1493
01:20:22,199 --> 01:20:22,960
so they.

1494
01:20:22,840 --> 01:20:25,960
Speaker 1: Were useful in knowing where the fuck Saladin was. And

1495
01:20:25,960 --> 01:20:28,880
by the way, I assume Saladin. You said, guys in Carrick, right,

1496
01:20:29,640 --> 01:20:31,159
so Saladin can no, no.

1497
01:20:30,920 --> 01:20:33,640
Speaker 2: No, he's not in charac ok He's in Asalon.

1498
01:20:33,800 --> 01:20:36,000
Speaker 1: Okay, I mean either way, though, Saladin can just go

1499
01:20:36,039 --> 01:20:37,800
and fuck his shit up anytime.

1500
01:20:39,039 --> 01:20:45,319
Speaker 2: But why fuck up when there's inner inner battles? Oh no,

1501
01:20:45,439 --> 01:20:48,880
let your enemies eat them though, Yeah, exactly, yeah. Again

1502
01:20:49,000 --> 01:20:52,359
he falls to another fever. He returns to Jerusalem in

1503
01:20:52,439 --> 01:20:57,079
late eleven eighty four. In early eleven eighty five, Bobwin

1504
01:20:57,159 --> 01:21:01,920
bestout regency to Raymond of Tripoli. Again, the man that

1505
01:21:02,079 --> 01:21:06,800
originally had it is first cousin removed. Though we never

1506
01:21:06,840 --> 01:21:10,399
really trusted Raymond Foley, he still was like, I have

1507
01:21:10,479 --> 01:21:13,520
no better alternative, right, who else might he give it to.

1508
01:21:13,960 --> 01:21:18,439
He was expected to survive the illness, having done twice before,

1509
01:21:18,520 --> 01:21:21,199
but within weeks it became a parent. That was probably

1510
01:21:21,239 --> 01:21:24,119
his last time. Sometimes you just take a turn. On

1511
01:21:24,119 --> 01:21:26,960
his deathbed, he summoned the High Court and appointed a

1512
01:21:26,960 --> 01:21:29,960
permanent regent for his nephew bob Win the Fifth and

1513
01:21:30,039 --> 01:21:33,840
Raymond was chosen. The dying king then ordered that homage

1514
01:21:33,840 --> 01:21:37,239
be rendered to his nephew as king and Raymond as Regent,

1515
01:21:37,880 --> 01:21:41,680
to be followed by a crown wearing ceremony at the

1516
01:21:41,800 --> 01:21:46,640
Church of the Holy Sepulcher. There you go, bob. When

1517
01:21:46,680 --> 01:21:51,000
the Fourth died March eleven eighty five, he was buried

1518
01:21:51,079 --> 01:21:56,199
in that very church, close to his father, King Almaric.

1519
01:21:57,119 --> 01:21:59,720
The young King. Bob Win the Fifth, however, dies the

1520
01:21:59,760 --> 01:22:02,680
next year. Oh no, what happened to it? Maybe Baldwin

1521
01:22:02,720 --> 01:22:06,720
dies malaria just being a kid. Yeah. In the Middle Ages, yep.

1522
01:22:07,840 --> 01:22:11,920
His sister succees her son, and of course Guy is

1523
01:22:12,039 --> 01:22:17,079
mad king. Sounds about right, Baldwin. The Force Realm was

1524
01:22:17,079 --> 01:22:21,279
destroyed by Saladean following the decisive victory of Guy at

1525
01:22:21,319 --> 01:22:25,640
the Horns of the Hatton in eleven eighty seven. His

1526
01:22:26,119 --> 01:22:29,319
Baldwin's sister and her daughters died in eleven ninety, leaving

1527
01:22:29,399 --> 01:22:32,159
Isabella the First as the heir to the defeated kingdom.

1528
01:22:32,199 --> 01:22:36,239
So everything kind of falls apart once Baldwin dies. Well. Also,

1529
01:22:36,279 --> 01:22:40,000
they take Jerusalem. Saladin does not long after that, but

1530
01:22:40,119 --> 01:22:42,920
not under Baldwin's watch, Baldwin has to die first. Yeah.

1531
01:22:44,319 --> 01:22:46,399
They never lose territory under Baldwin either.

1532
01:22:47,479 --> 01:22:48,560
Speaker 1: He's fucking elite, dude.

1533
01:22:48,640 --> 01:22:51,439
Speaker 2: Yeah, while he's on the throne the kingdom, losing no territory.

1534
01:22:51,520 --> 01:22:56,199
He flourishes economically and spiritually. He's always putting out fires

1535
01:22:56,199 --> 01:23:00,319
with his fucking family. He understood the importance of urban

1536
01:23:00,479 --> 01:23:07,880
Saladine's power. Most Muslim historians too, had mad respects for Baldwin. Really, like,

1537
01:23:07,920 --> 01:23:10,000
in spite of illness. The Franks were loyal to him.

1538
01:23:10,439 --> 01:23:13,720
They gave him every encouragement, being satisfied to have him

1539
01:23:13,760 --> 01:23:17,000
as their ruler. They exalted him, they were anxious to

1540
01:23:17,079 --> 01:23:19,800
keep him in office. But they paid no attention to

1541
01:23:19,840 --> 01:23:22,960
his leprosy. So they were kind of like blown away

1542
01:23:22,960 --> 01:23:25,439
by that, Like, how are you letting this freak show leader.

1543
01:23:29,119 --> 01:23:31,880
Baldwin's public image may have been aided by his chastity

1544
01:23:31,920 --> 01:23:35,600
as well, seeing as evidence of more of a godly figure.

1545
01:23:35,840 --> 01:23:38,000
Speaker 1: Yeah, that was usually a thing with chicks, but a

1546
01:23:38,119 --> 01:23:42,680
virginity in general, Like that's why, I mean, dude, Even

1547
01:23:42,720 --> 01:23:46,199
like three hundred years later, the Elizabeth she was not

1548
01:23:46,239 --> 01:23:48,640
a virgin, and she was getting drilled by the aforementioned

1549
01:23:48,640 --> 01:23:51,760
Francis Drake and other people, but I think Walter Raleigh

1550
01:23:51,800 --> 01:23:54,880
maybe too. So she gave off the appearance she she

1551
01:23:54,920 --> 01:23:57,199
never got married, so people were like, oh, she's a virgin. Literally,

1552
01:23:58,199 --> 01:24:09,479
Virginia is named after Queen Elizabeth the Virgin Queen, do

1553
01:24:09,520 --> 01:24:09,680
you know?

1554
01:24:10,319 --> 01:24:13,560
Speaker 2: Yeah? Is she about that? Yeah? Yeah, yeah, fucked a

1555
01:24:13,560 --> 01:24:14,199
lot though.

1556
01:24:14,039 --> 01:24:17,119
Speaker 1: She got Oh my god, she was getting drilled all

1557
01:24:17,159 --> 01:24:19,479
the time, which.

1558
01:24:19,279 --> 01:24:22,319
Speaker 2: Is ironic though, because Baldwin's not like overly religious.

1559
01:24:22,600 --> 01:24:25,520
Speaker 1: Really, no, he's pragmatist.

1560
01:24:26,279 --> 01:24:28,119
Speaker 2: He is more of a pregnant living in the loveliest

1561
01:24:28,119 --> 01:24:31,079
city on Earth, loves history. He was given you know,

1562
01:24:31,159 --> 01:24:35,479
it's his birthright. Yeah, kind of, not really, it becomes

1563
01:24:35,520 --> 01:24:38,720
his birthright. Look, anything can become a birthright if you

1564
01:24:38,760 --> 01:24:41,359
live long enough and everyone else dies, and very rarely

1565
01:24:41,479 --> 01:24:43,600
his power given to those who deserve it. I think

1566
01:24:43,640 --> 01:24:45,119
Baldwin kind of did. I agree.

1567
01:24:45,960 --> 01:24:50,640
Speaker 1: The leoprosy really humbled him from an early age, although

1568
01:24:50,640 --> 01:24:52,439
it's funny in the movie they act like he didn't

1569
01:24:52,439 --> 01:24:56,159
know he had leoprosy at sixteen, yeah, which he definitely

1570
01:24:56,640 --> 01:24:58,439
for sure knew this entire time.

1571
01:24:58,560 --> 01:25:02,279
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's like I can't feel it when you poke

1572
01:25:02,359 --> 01:25:03,159
me with the sword.

1573
01:25:03,359 --> 01:25:05,239
Speaker 1: I kind of wonder if you like, as a kid,

1574
01:25:05,279 --> 01:25:07,279
that was like a fun school yard trick. He's like, dude,

1575
01:25:07,279 --> 01:25:08,880
punch me in the right arm. I won't feel nothing.

1576
01:25:09,239 --> 01:25:11,640
Speaker 2: I bet it was. You can't hurt me. Pinch me, dude?

1577
01:25:11,640 --> 01:25:12,079
What can you?

1578
01:25:12,319 --> 01:25:14,520
Speaker 1: Can you imagine playing slug bug with him or whatever?

1579
01:25:14,600 --> 01:25:17,079
What is it? Not slug bug but where you punch

1580
01:25:17,079 --> 01:25:17,640
each other in the.

1581
01:25:17,640 --> 01:25:20,199
Speaker 2: Arm buggy like if you see a volt Volkswagen.

1582
01:25:20,359 --> 01:25:22,359
Speaker 1: No, it's not that, it's where fuck What is a

1583
01:25:22,399 --> 01:25:25,039
game called where you just take turns punching each other

1584
01:25:25,079 --> 01:25:28,479
in the arm till somebody gives up. You never played

1585
01:25:28,479 --> 01:25:29,159
that game as a kid?

1586
01:25:29,239 --> 01:25:34,760
Speaker 2: No? You never? We ball tapped, Yeah, balt to whatever

1587
01:25:34,760 --> 01:25:36,399
I'm talking about. It's literally it's like a game. It's

1588
01:25:36,399 --> 01:25:38,680
like a dual doorknob someone farts.

1589
01:25:40,039 --> 01:25:42,119
Speaker 1: No, it's like a dual you like challenge them, like, dude,

1590
01:25:42,119 --> 01:25:43,239
play me in slug or whatever.

1591
01:25:43,399 --> 01:25:45,079
Speaker 2: Forget what it's called. We had slap fights.

1592
01:25:45,600 --> 01:25:47,800
Speaker 1: I've done all those things too. But what I'm saying

1593
01:25:48,640 --> 01:25:50,680
you never did the arm punching thing where it's like

1594
01:25:50,880 --> 01:25:53,079
you challenge each other to punch each other in you

1595
01:25:53,319 --> 01:25:55,079
take turn. It's like a slap. It's like a one

1596
01:25:55,079 --> 01:25:57,079
of those slap contests, right that you see from Russia

1597
01:25:57,159 --> 01:25:58,680
or whatever where they fucking.

1598
01:25:58,399 --> 01:25:59,880
Speaker 2: Power slap, power slap or whatever.

1599
01:26:01,199 --> 01:26:03,720
Speaker 1: It's two dudes and you're punching each other in the

1600
01:26:03,800 --> 01:26:04,399
arm and until.

1601
01:26:04,399 --> 01:26:06,439
Speaker 2: So we didn't do that, but we did Rick Flair

1602
01:26:06,520 --> 01:26:09,039
chop offs. So like I Rick Flair chopped, do you

1603
01:26:09,039 --> 01:26:11,199
you Rick Flair chopp oka kind of get went back

1604
01:26:11,239 --> 01:26:13,039
and forth. I didn't punch you in the arm.

1605
01:26:12,880 --> 01:26:14,680
Speaker 1: Though, Okay, it's the same thing, like you got to

1606
01:26:14,760 --> 01:26:17,159
wind up like not running started, but like you have

1607
01:26:17,239 --> 01:26:20,039
to wind up punch in the fucking arm and then

1608
01:26:20,199 --> 01:26:23,159
you're like, ah fuck and then you know, you turn around,

1609
01:26:23,199 --> 01:26:24,079
you get to give it to them.

1610
01:26:24,199 --> 01:26:28,359
Speaker 2: Yeah, we got it. That'd be fun with Baldwin.

1611
01:26:28,800 --> 01:26:30,760
Speaker 1: Oh, Baldwin had to have dominated one.

1612
01:26:30,760 --> 01:26:33,520
Speaker 2: Imagine. I can't imagine he was super strong with the

1613
01:26:33,560 --> 01:26:34,039
punch back.

1614
01:26:34,199 --> 01:26:36,560
Speaker 1: Oh yeah, swinging with the left hand actually probably yeah,

1615
01:26:36,680 --> 01:26:37,960
unless he was left handed.

1616
01:26:39,159 --> 01:26:43,560
Speaker 2: They just they they fixed like a a brass knuckle situation.

1617
01:26:44,600 --> 01:26:47,720
Speaker 1: Well, if he's left hand, he's fine, right, he's because

1618
01:26:47,720 --> 01:26:49,119
I think you're supposed to punch in the arm. You

1619
01:26:49,119 --> 01:26:51,039
don't punch with otherwise it's not fair that the one

1620
01:26:51,039 --> 01:26:51,960
guy gets to go first.

1621
01:26:52,079 --> 01:26:52,279
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1622
01:26:54,039 --> 01:26:56,479
Speaker 1: Yeah, so you punched in the left arm typically and

1623
01:26:56,479 --> 01:26:56,960
then the right.

1624
01:26:56,880 --> 01:27:00,399
Speaker 2: You punched it at the same time. No you side,

1625
01:27:00,520 --> 01:27:02,640
you say you're hitting the hitting the hitting this.

1626
01:27:02,600 --> 01:27:05,079
Speaker 1: Party, I get it. Who's today's hitler?

1627
01:27:07,640 --> 01:27:09,439
Speaker 2: Get gee? Gee gee?

1628
01:27:10,239 --> 01:27:16,800
Speaker 1: Although, honestly, like low key, Saladin killed a lot of Muslims,

1629
01:27:16,800 --> 01:27:19,520
so let's let's pump the branks on him being a

1630
01:27:19,600 --> 01:27:20,760
hero of the religion.

1631
01:27:21,399 --> 01:27:24,640
Speaker 2: You gotta do what you gotta do, get power. They're

1632
01:27:24,640 --> 01:27:25,720
a pragmatic religion.

1633
01:27:25,760 --> 01:27:26,880
Speaker 1: What's would you learn today?

1634
01:27:27,800 --> 01:27:28,079
Speaker 2: Umm?

1635
01:27:28,520 --> 01:27:30,640
Speaker 1: Well, I learned that Baldwin did not have a mask.

1636
01:27:30,880 --> 01:27:36,119
Speaker 2: Bummer. I learned that a baby Bjorn for Kings existed

1637
01:27:37,000 --> 01:27:41,560
for adult lepper Kings towards the end.

1638
01:27:41,640 --> 01:27:45,000
Speaker 1: Yeah yeah, which is just such a bummer to think

1639
01:27:45,039 --> 01:27:46,239
about at all.

1640
01:27:47,439 --> 01:27:50,479
Speaker 2: I don't like it. It's not a great visual for battle. Yeah.

1641
01:27:51,000 --> 01:27:53,439
Speaker 1: Not surprised Ridley Scott left out on the cutty floor.

1642
01:27:54,079 --> 01:27:55,520
That would have been so dope though.

1643
01:27:58,680 --> 01:28:00,279
Speaker 2: Uh yeah, I learned a lot today.

1644
01:28:00,319 --> 01:28:03,119
Speaker 1: Actually I didn't know. I mean I was familiar with all,

1645
01:28:03,359 --> 01:28:07,000
like certain parts of this from King Heaven and just

1646
01:28:07,000 --> 01:28:08,039
gaming and stuff like that.

1647
01:28:08,079 --> 01:28:10,840
Speaker 2: But yeah, I learned a lot today. Actually, go well,

1648
01:28:11,680 --> 01:28:13,880
that's all we got today. Make sure to check out

1649
01:28:13,880 --> 01:28:17,479
the Patreon at patreon dot com slash softcore history to

1650
01:28:17,600 --> 01:28:22,239
additional episodes every week Wednesday Friday they drop. There's also

1651
01:28:22,680 --> 01:28:25,479
at this point like three years of evergreen content. Not

1652
01:28:25,640 --> 01:28:27,079
like you. I don't think you can go back and

1653
01:28:27,079 --> 01:28:29,359
listen to it all now. Do you sign up right now?

1654
01:28:29,479 --> 01:28:31,479
I don't think you can drop in two a week.

1655
01:28:31,880 --> 01:28:33,159
Speaker 1: You're not gonna be able to catch you up. It's

1656
01:28:33,199 --> 01:28:33,880
too much content.

1657
01:28:33,960 --> 01:28:36,760
Speaker 2: We dare you to try. Yes, do we challenge you.

1658
01:28:37,600 --> 01:28:39,479
We challenge you to listen to all our speed run.

1659
01:28:40,039 --> 01:28:41,880
If you do, say, sign up on Patreon, though, do

1660
01:28:41,920 --> 01:28:44,359
it through a web browser, please and thank you.

1661
01:28:44,560 --> 01:28:47,000
Speaker 1: If you do it with Apple pay on your iPhone

1662
01:28:47,439 --> 01:28:50,680
through the Patreon app, they will take thirty percent of

1663
01:28:50,720 --> 01:28:51,399
the money we need.

1664
01:28:51,640 --> 01:28:53,079
Speaker 2: It won't really affect you because we're not going to

1665
01:28:53,159 --> 01:28:53,880
raise the price, but.

1666
01:28:54,000 --> 01:28:57,039
Speaker 1: You you pay the same, it would really kind of

1667
01:28:57,039 --> 01:28:59,119
fuck us. It takes a third of it out.

1668
01:28:59,159 --> 01:29:01,520
Speaker 2: If you cu sign up online and then you can

1669
01:29:01,600 --> 01:29:02,880
use the Patreon app on your phone.

1670
01:29:03,000 --> 01:29:05,920
Speaker 1: Yeah, yeah, Patron apps totally fine to use, just don't

1671
01:29:05,960 --> 01:29:08,479
pay on it. If you could you could sign up

1672
01:29:08,520 --> 01:29:09,600
through a web browser.

1673
01:29:09,600 --> 01:29:13,600
Speaker 2: That'd be to usual laptop or whatever. Uh yeah, leave

1674
01:29:13,640 --> 01:29:17,479
review please and thank you five stars Apple Spotify haven't

1675
01:29:17,479 --> 01:29:19,960
gotten a new review and Apple a long time. It's

1676
01:29:20,000 --> 01:29:23,560
been months. It's been months since we got a fucking review.

1677
01:29:23,960 --> 01:29:26,000
I can check if we have. I don't think we have,

1678
01:29:27,159 --> 01:29:29,960
but yeah, well read them off. We get some good reviews,

1679
01:29:29,960 --> 01:29:32,239
so I mean, even if you've left the review, re

1680
01:29:32,399 --> 01:29:34,560
up it. I don't know. Yeah, do a five star

1681
01:29:34,600 --> 01:29:38,920
and write again please and then rank it does It's

1682
01:29:38,920 --> 01:29:40,800
the only way in manipulate the charts. Tell a friend

1683
01:29:40,800 --> 01:29:43,319
about the podcast too, Tell multiple friends, tell a crew

1684
01:29:43,359 --> 01:29:45,560
about it. We're complete strangers a date.

1685
01:29:45,960 --> 01:29:48,399
Speaker 1: Yeah, I think there are a bunch of people at

1686
01:29:48,439 --> 01:29:50,079
the wedding. I was out a month ago that I

1687
01:29:50,199 --> 01:29:52,560
was the best man for, gave a speech and you know,

1688
01:29:52,680 --> 01:29:54,439
made a lot of friends. Like in the wedding party,

1689
01:29:54,439 --> 01:29:57,600
they're all super nice, super cool, and they're like, oh wow,

1690
01:29:57,720 --> 01:29:59,720
that's what you do for a living, which is always

1691
01:29:59,760 --> 01:30:02,800
like the worse to even explain. But it's also sounds

1692
01:30:02,840 --> 01:30:05,039
like they're talking down Neil. Yeah, but no they're like,

1693
01:30:05,079 --> 01:30:06,640
oh my god, I'm gonna listen to it. For sure,

1694
01:30:07,199 --> 01:30:09,319
but our listeners haven't really gone up. So I think

1695
01:30:09,319 --> 01:30:11,159
I was just lied to by a bunch of well

1696
01:30:11,199 --> 01:30:12,000
meaning liars.

1697
01:30:12,880 --> 01:30:13,159
Speaker 2: Yeah.

1698
01:30:13,479 --> 01:30:16,720
Speaker 1: So if you're listening to this and you were at

1699
01:30:16,920 --> 01:30:23,800
Daddy's wedding, fine, good, thank you, but I don't here.

1700
01:30:24,000 --> 01:30:27,239
I don't think they are dirty liars. Well, if you

1701
01:30:27,439 --> 01:30:29,000
just pick up his you know.

1702
01:30:29,000 --> 01:30:32,279
Speaker 2: Third job as an uber driver, you know what I was.

1703
01:30:32,520 --> 01:30:34,279
You just played the podcast and be like, oh, what's

1704
01:30:34,279 --> 01:30:36,600
this and you just crank it up. Oh, that's not

1705
01:30:36,680 --> 01:30:40,880
the worst idea. You're just constantly having that going. And

1706
01:30:40,880 --> 01:30:43,079
then they're like sounds like you, look, it's not me.

1707
01:30:43,479 --> 01:30:45,279
You gotta play off like it's not you. You gotta

1708
01:30:45,439 --> 01:30:46,920
do a de voice, do do an accent?

1709
01:30:47,199 --> 01:30:49,640
Speaker 1: Yeah, oh no, I love it's not me. I was

1710
01:30:49,680 --> 01:30:53,760
just too bloody hilarious Americans or following.

1711
01:30:54,920 --> 01:30:57,720
Speaker 2: I love them. I just saw the lads are so funny.

1712
01:30:57,720 --> 01:31:01,960
You go listen to it. Very small British pist initially sorry,

1713
01:31:02,439 --> 01:31:07,359
I'll no better, ill, no, I'll know it's funny. I'll no, Yeah,

1714
01:31:07,479 --> 01:31:08,399
what are you gonning? In love?

1715
01:31:09,479 --> 01:31:12,479
Speaker 1: But I kind of want to be like a Domino's driver,

1716
01:31:12,640 --> 01:31:13,359
just get free pizza.

1717
01:31:14,319 --> 01:31:16,079
Speaker 2: I was gonna say, you could also just be an

1718
01:31:16,159 --> 01:31:20,880
uber driver with like a Pakistani accent. I don't know

1719
01:31:20,880 --> 01:31:21,560
if I could sell it.

1720
01:31:21,600 --> 01:31:25,239
Speaker 1: I actually don't have a good Arabic or Anean accent here. Yeah,

1721
01:31:25,520 --> 01:31:27,840
I can't do it without it being like overly offensive,

1722
01:31:28,279 --> 01:31:32,279
I mean offensive or not. Look, my Irish accent's pretty

1723
01:31:32,880 --> 01:31:36,359
top of the morning. Tell your lad like that's if

1724
01:31:36,399 --> 01:31:38,600
an actual Irish person here is that. You know, you

1725
01:31:38,680 --> 01:31:43,520
sound like a fucking cartoon. But to us it's no

1726
01:31:43,560 --> 01:31:44,279
different than not po.

1727
01:31:45,359 --> 01:31:49,199
Speaker 2: Yeah, nailed it, crushed. Yeah anyway, so I got for

1728
01:31:49,319 --> 01:31:52,119
today for rough Fox, I'm Damna Jester. You just got Saucer.