Speaker 1: Erow dot net. It's more than a podcast, It's a
podcast network, twenty different podcasts to choose from. One of
them being Beyond the Calling. I was challenged to talk
with the men and women who have served this nation
when it comes to the military. Listen to their stories,
grow from their experiences. Now share it with everybody Beyond
the Calling on erow dot net, Arie dot net. Enjoy
your exploration. How are you doing today?
Speaker 2: I'm very good at expin it.
Speaker 1: I'll tell you what your new book is something that
a lot of people need to not only put their
hands on it, but they need to activate it. While
you were putting it together, did you feel that same energy?
It's like, okay, here are my thoughts, but I need
to see some physical activation.
Speaker 2: Yes, I did, and I also felt the physical activation
within myself going through the whole process of writing the books.
And I wrote it specifically in the way that I
did so that I can activate people. I have this
section called the Soul as an Answer, so that we
start thinking by ourselves about what we're going through and
what is a lying underneath the surface. And then I
also have these sections where I have the nudget notes
reader also to activate the readers to get more into themselves,
think into more into their bodies.
Speaker 1: Now did you have to go in there and basically
redefine the word fear because I bout fell over when
somebody yesterday told me fear is not what you think
it is, it's respect, and I thought, I've never heard
of that before. What do you think?
Speaker 2: Well? I always looked at fear from a perspective of
fear is the trigger, then it wants to teach you something.
So whenever I felt fear, I always went like fall
towards this sad on and tried to say what it
was trying to tell me? Where is it coming from?
Why do I feel a certain way?
Speaker 1: Now? One of the things that you cover is insomnia
in the way that you know. I mean, because I'm
a meditator. I also I will not take melatonin or
any drugs to go to sleep. My wife, on the
other hand, is one hundred percent different. But the thing
about it is, though, is that when you have insomnia,
it feels like you are under a lot of trauma.
How do you suggest that we handle the trauma or,
as you said a few seconds ago.
Speaker 2: The trigger for me, it was definitely in the combination
of the fear, because my insomnia came with an aspect
of fear, and I didn't realize that the anxiety that
I was feeling in my infomnia was a trigger related
to earn abuse that I had gone through earlier in life.
So I think when we are not when we're having
difficulties sleeping, it's actually not about going through our head
as an Oh I want to sleep, Oh I need
to sleep. I have to get up early tomorrow morning.
This is going to cost me. I'm going to feel
very exhausted tomorrow when I wake up, I won't be
able to function properly. I think if we let go
of all those triggers, those mental thoughts, and we try
to ask ourselves what am I actually feeling? Where is
this coming from? I think from that perspective we can
get deeper underneath the surface to really find out what
is happening. Also, the aspect of feelings also so much.
The fact that I would anxiety and have like this
feeling of ants crawling underneath my skin. I didn't understand it.
I didn't understand and it will only frustrate me even
more because why am I feeling this way? And so
I think when I started asking myself these questions and
I started looking deeper within and finding the answerity insomnia,
I understood it better. And there's also an aspect of
time that we sleep. We think that we need seven
to eight hours to be able to function fly in
the world, but everybody's biology is different and everybody needs
maybe a little bit more time, maybe less more time.
It all depends on yourself. So if we start trying
to figure out what works for us, the amounts of
sleep that works for us, that also brings peace. It
also brings press where you can look at the whole
situation from a different perspective.
Speaker 1: Please do not move. There's more with Charmai D coming
up next, the name of the book, Finding Sleep Resting
in a Body Shaped by Fear. Let's get back to
that talk with Charmaie D. Now, Charmlie. My situation is
is that when I did morning radio, my wake up
time was three forty five am. Guess what since the
nineteen nineties is when I did morning radio, I still
wake up at three forty five. Those creative monsters want
to get up and get to work. So I sometimes
I'll go, you don't have insomnia, you need to tame
down that inner creative monster.
Speaker 2: Absolutely, your biology has learned to wake up at a
certain time. Yep. Oh, as much as you want to
change it, maybe you can try by this giving yourself
a half an hour extra time in bed and see
how that works for you. And spending that time on
your days of might give you also rest, not having
to get up immediately and want to run and go
with the flow, but more as taking a time to
wake up into the body, wake up into the world,
feel what you maybe think about, what you dreamt els
the night before, or how did you experience your sleep
the evening before you woke up. So these are all
aspects I find very helpful when I wake up at
a certain time and I like wide awake and I
can't go back to solid.
Speaker 1: See, I used your book as a way to calm
my butt down this morning in the way that I
was very creative. I was ready to go at three
o'clock this morning. And the thing is, though, is in
using your words your lessons in life, I said, Okay,
I realize you're awake, but let's just go out here
and like you said, I'm going to rest in my
body and then and then at a certain time, you
can get up if you need to get up. I
had one of the most peaceful dreams by doing what
you suggested, Charmie.
Speaker 2: Mm hmm. Yeah. It's we always think that the body
needs rest when we sleep well, the body can also
rest by just lying down and calming the mind.
Speaker 1: So how many adults are trapped in an addiction and
that addiction has created a guilt trip which has poisoned
the soul. I mean, it's like there's so much weight
on your paragraphs and it's almost like we're going to
be coming to you, Charmie. It's just say I need
some help here.
Speaker 2: M hmm. Well, I look forward to hearing from everybody
so that I can help give you my advice.
Speaker 1: I mean, you you talked about something very traumatic that
happened to you as a child. I mean, so many
times people will say, yeah, this is what happened to me,
and you go, I want to go into what you're saying.
But it's the difference between empathy and sympathy. Do we
jump into the hole or do they have to sit
there and realize how to get out of that hole?
And we're going to be standing up here with our
adult choes on saying I knew you could do it,
I knew you could pass this.
Speaker 2: But isn't that the ego telling us that we need
to have a result, yes, amen, instead of just accepting
a situation for as it is. And empathy does not
mean that you have to get involved. And you can
have empathy from a distance looking at a person's situation,
embracing it, but not having to jump in and say, oh,
I need the help, or this is happening to me
and I need to help myself figure it out and
put pressure on ourselves, which creates even more anxiety, even
more stress. When we learn to accept that things are
the way they are, it brings peace, and peace brings relaxation.
Speaker 1: Abandonment is something that you put focus on. And I
believe that we as people abandon ourselves throughout the day,
and when we abandon ourselves, we go through the same
emotions of what we feel when another person abandons us.
Speaker 2: Yes, and these are lessons that we don't realize that
we are thought from abandonment when we are abandoned by
the person that is supposed to cure for us and
give us the love that we need, and we start
neglecting our own love because we never learned how to
love ourselves from the beginning. We're abandoning ourselves, so in
situations we keep abandoning ourselves.
Speaker 1: Wow, where can people go to find out more about you?
Because I want them to understand your depth as well
as your true compassion for all people.
Speaker 2: I have a Facebook page called Finding Sleep and you
can go to website which is finding ww dot finding
fleabook dot com. It is still under construction, so please
don't expect something super friendly or whatever. Very basic, and
then you can also send me an email at hello
at finding fleetbook dot com.
Speaker 1: I love it. You got to come back to this
show anytime in the future so that we can talk
about this even more and more and more to help
people grow forward in a very peace filled mind.
Speaker 2: I was absolutely love that arrow excellent.
Speaker 1: Will you be brilliant today?
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, thank you very much