Speaker 1: When your old career gives you lemons throwing some ice,
mixing some vodka. Colored a podcast from the Mac of
All Trade Studio in Fairport and driven by Victor Chrysler
Dots jeep Ram. It's Billified the Bill Moran Podcast.
Speaker 2: Hello and welcome. Thank you for getting your pot on.
Thanks for telling a friend, and that's how we spread
the word about the pirate ship. And he's got it.
How many different Buffalo Bill's hats do you have?
Speaker 3: Twelve?
Speaker 2: All right, that's pretty good. Yeah.
Speaker 4: You know what's funny is that, like people already trying
to break down next season. I have no interest. I
don't know what it is. I think a Bill's out, Yeah,
could be Bill's exhaustion.
Speaker 2: I feel fatigue, Yeah, I feel very fatigue. I've had
a really hard week, like a really really challenging week
this week.
Speaker 4: Wow. Yeah, not good and like most of your weeks
like start like that. So this is like above the baseline.
Speaker 2: Huh, this is above the baseline. And it's not anything
that I am comfortable talking about. Not that I can't
talk about it. I could. It is my podcast. I
don't have to worry about anything. But there's a little
voice inside my head. I said, right now isn't the
time to discuss all that stuff. But there are things
that I do want to I want to talk about
because today was actually overall a really really good day. Good.
But it's been a real shitty, tough week, just a
tough week. All the weekends almost here, I know, and
I yes, and I have a colonoscopy Friday. Oh, I
start the prep tomorrow.
Speaker 4: I had idea.
Speaker 2: I know.
Speaker 4: I don't know if we should discuss it.
Speaker 2: Sure, we'll have an on air, a non podcast meeting meeting.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, but you talk about you your fear of this.
I love my last my last hilioscopy.
Speaker 4: It was fantastic, didn't feel a thing.
Speaker 2: The rep was awesome. I don't have a problem.
Speaker 3: You get the news.
Speaker 4: Only two polyps see in five years. Yeah, you had
to see it.
Speaker 3: You're dock in three years, So I wonder if my
dog's holding back.
Speaker 2: No, I'm also significantly older than you. I'm almost ten
years older than you, right forty five, I'm forty five. Yeah,
I'm gonna be fifty five.
Speaker 3: And can't they just let you dump in the box
like Coli Guarden?
Speaker 2: Probably, I don't know, Uh, but because they were there's
nobody removing anything, so I think you want to see
if there's polyps. So you go in. I got to
start the prep tomorrow, but I have Fisher classes, so I.
Speaker 4: My satellite from the men's room.
Speaker 2: I don't know so.
Speaker 3: Well, I'm sorry.
Speaker 4: If I a satellite, that's that's a that's an outdated
term on zoom from the bathroom.
Speaker 2: So here's the weird part that the week before I
had something that was that was going to interfere with class,
that had to do with another class. So I needed
to be in the studio and I had to do
I have to do an assessment on somebody, right, and
write a treatment plan and all this stuff. So he
had to interview somebody and they are the same person
for everybody, but so you had to schedule times, like
you can't just fight some random Now, like this is
a guy who is is a counselor himself. I think
he went through the Fisher program and it is now
maybe a professor at another institution somewhere in the country.
And he comes on and you're supposed to and he
plays a part and you're supposed to like pull information
out of him based on the story that you get
and then from there you have to write the assessment.
So I had to do that last Thursday at six thirty.
But I have another class that begins at seven. So
I called my professor, which I probably isn't the protocol
to do that, but he's also a friend, and I said, hey, man,
I'm going to be late tonight. Or maybe I texted
and but I had something that was just pretty traumatic
going on the night before. So he said to me,
I said, I'll be late, and then I told him
what was happening and all the parts involved in it,
and it's very like, it's just it's not nice, it's
not fun. So he said to me later that day,
he goes listen, not because of you, But there were
several other issues that came up. I'm making tonight's class
asynchronous and don't worry about coming in and we'll meet
again next week. So then this then I had gone.
Remember I went for the physical, and I thought I
was going for just an assessment. I don't know i'd
talk about AfterAll, and it wasn't. It was a physical
and the guy said, hey, you got it. You're overdue
for He says, you're six months old. I'm not we
The last time I had one was right before the
podcast started three years ago.
Speaker 4: Okay, so it's been a bit.
Speaker 2: Yeah. So he said you're overdue. Uh you know, what
do you think? I go, great, sign me up. So
he said they're gonna call you. You got to answer
because if you don't answer, they're not going to call back.
They call twice and that's it. They don't call anymore.
They do is they send a text and it says
can you make this time? Will wire enter one or two?
Because I hit why for yes? And I get back
at textas says we can't process. I go, what do
you mean? Oh shit, I had to send one so
I couldn't. I said no to one day and then
I get another one and I go, oh, it's a Friday,
now fine, I'll miss happy or it'll be whatever. It's
like three o'clock in the afternoon. So uh then I'm
I'm thinking, oh, literally, shit, I got to start the prep.
So what am I going to do because I'm going
to be at Fisher because I start at one o'clock
in the afternoon tomorrow. So then I'm driving with my
son and I get a call from the U of
r and says, hey, doctor wants to know if you
can come in and have it at one point thirty
be here by one fifteen. So I say, yeah, no problem.
And I said, what, by the way, what do I
have to do to prep for this anymore? I don't
really remember because I used to hear it was horrific,
but when I had it, it was okay. And so
they tell me and they go, oh, yeah, but you know, no,
you got to really be on like a liquid diet
all that day, the first day, and you're going to
start with the ducal Acts at one o'clock and then
between five and six pm you have to drink your
first Mirrlax drink. And I go, oh, well, I have
grad school at ten o'clock. And she said, uh oh,
I don't know, hope you have a bathroom nearby. And
I go, oh, I may be stinking yes, and she goes, yeah, yeah,
it's possible. And I said, eh, so I write, I said,
its smelly kidden class. Patrick Ralph was you had a name?
Poor kid? It's like second grade Patrick Ralf. I don't
even know if he's still alive, but Patrick Raff, Yeah,
that makes it stark. I should I should look up
Patrick ral. So I send it to the professor and
he goes, I've had plenty of those. You should be fine,
but if need be, I'll zoom you in from the bathroom.
So my plan is to go to Fisher tomorrow. If
things get a little squishy, I'll leave. Okay, I'll leave go.
I think I should be okay. I'm thinking that most
of the storm will hit, like you know, if i'm if,
I'm pretty wow, I'm thinking like I talked to Kevin,
if we've got the European model, says it should you know,
the ship will start falling at ten pm. I'm going
I'm pretty good. You know, I should be okay.
Speaker 4: But that's my Yeah, that's that's my triple droppler, triple dropper.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 4: So they always say the prep is worse. My prep
was fine. I know a guy though, who had a
garbage plate the night before.
Speaker 2: Why would you do that?
Speaker 4: They tell you not, They tell you not to specifically that.
Speaker 2: Yeah, and uh, I was trying to play peekaboo.
Speaker 4: With He thought that since he was having a colonoscopy
and having the prep, that he could have the plate
with no consequences, meaning calories and that stuff. He could
have the plate and flush it all out with the
Uh right, well they was phil, good guy goes, uh yeah,
So I had my colonoscopy, I had a garbage plate
and then I started drinking the stuff and it all
didn't come out. So when it was done, the nurse
came out.
Speaker 3: So the doctor doesn't want to see you.
Speaker 4: Yeah, like after the colonoscopy because they had to clear
out more crap. Oh no, oh yeah, I mean there
are no polyps, but doctor doesn't want to see you,
like theyn't come talk to you afterward. Hey, look, Dan,
you got two pile ups and that quarter that you
swallowed yours three. You must have passed it when you
were three, because we didn't see that either.
Speaker 2: Well, uh yeah, so that that'll be my fun weekend,
you know, after a crappy week. I don't know. I
might have to go have a drink later tonight.
Speaker 4: Okay, then hey, mixing the dolcalact.
Speaker 2: See what happens. I think I can still have a
drink tonight. Yeah.
Speaker 4: Probably.
Speaker 2: I don't start to prep until tomorrow. You're fine, I think,
so I don't.
Speaker 4: Worry about Well, did you have this issue before, like
your last colonoscopy, and then your mom had a friend
who was a nurse, and she told you that, no,
you could probably get away with you know, as.
Speaker 3: Long as you do X, Y and Z.
Speaker 2: Yeah, but you.
Speaker 3: Had an endoscopy too though.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yeah, we had.
Speaker 3: Out of both ends.
Speaker 2: How do you remember this?
Speaker 4: No, I remember stuff that happened on the show, like
from fifteen years ago.
Speaker 2: Remember remember how I think I said like I was
being Eiffel Tower.
Speaker 3: Yeah, right, exactly.
Speaker 2: They're going to meet in the middle Bill, He's having
some work done. Yeah, I'm having some work done.
Speaker 4: But I so like this James Vanderbeek thing. The guy
was forty eight. Yeah, he died of stage three colon cancer.
And it got to a point where like this guy
was a a millionaire actor who ran out of money
because of treatment got to be so I think because
he was trying to get like better treatment and more
experiment and he just ran out. And you know, you
got like Alfonso Rabirio, like Carlton from Fresh Prince was
there with him when he died. So was I think
I forgot she did. George Clooney, she was in wrestling
beautiful woman. She was at his side, you know, and
I'm like thinking to myself, like I'm forty five, I'll
be forty six in April, and this runs in my family,
and I'm like, how do you get more men to
want to do this? And then I had an idea.
Now it would require a purchase, meaning you'd have to
go get a colonoscopy.
Speaker 3: But here's how it would work.
Speaker 4: We give it, Like somebody would have to, like a
big time sponsor would have to give away something big,
like a vacation or a car, or something life changing,
because cancer is life changing. So you got to award
a life changing prize, right, So you get one entry
for every pole up they find in your cold. So guys,
gals were rushing to get their colon cleansed or checked. Right, Hey, hey.
Speaker 2: Doc, doc, I had four. I had four pops.
Speaker 4: You got to tell the dealership.
Speaker 2: I had four. So you you're saying that based on
the person with the most polyps gets the.
Speaker 3: Most entries, That doesn't mean they're gonna win.
Speaker 2: They just get more entries to win whatever the prizes.
Speaker 4: Like a vacation, a car, a house, a life changing
you know, you know, experience should be offered a life
changing prize.
Speaker 2: But if you don't.
Speaker 4: At least you'll know where you stand if you don't win,
you know where you stand on the colonoscopiece.
Speaker 2: You've got to go sell this me.
Speaker 4: I'm not This is just an idea. I'm not saying
you got to sell it.
Speaker 2: I'd have to sell it to get the car to
give away. I'm find a car.
Speaker 3: Yeah, yeah, so in other words, car.
Speaker 4: Let's say, let's say we have a friends from like
a place called I don't know that rhymes with picture
dodge Taste. Yeah, be like, look, you know, hey, yeah,
you know, take away Kevin's car, give it to somebody
else and they enter all you know. No, isn't that
a cool idea?
Speaker 2: Though? It's a good idea.
Speaker 4: It gets people to screen their colons.
Speaker 2: Yes, yes, it is weird that we're seeing in younger
and younger people, and you think.
Speaker 4: Of I know two women who died in their thirties.
Speaker 2: Chadwick Boseman. Yeah, the actor, he yeah, died of it. Uh.
And I didn't. I thought he was in his thirties.
But people are saying, no, he was in his forties.
I didn't bother to look. I just I knew he
was young, right, too young for that Yeah, so that'll
be my.
Speaker 4: What was happening was a lot of the doctors because
they weren't seeing colon cancer happening in younger people, so
when they would go to the doctor with pain, they
would just recommend something and then the pain wouldn't go away,
it would just continue to grow.
Speaker 3: Well you're too young to have that. Well you're too young.
Speaker 4: Unless you had it is a history in your family.
They weren't going to check you for that right now.
They're like, oh, maybe we need to reassess this whole thing.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so somebody did bring something up saying that could
it be this is the first generation to really kind
of grow up on microwaved food.
Speaker 4: Yeah, it's quick, it's easy. If your parents were both working.
Speaker 2: You know, I might, I don't know.
Speaker 4: You got to take it out of the plastic. If
you're gonna do microwave, take it out of the plastic,
put it in glass, or put it in surrounds.
Speaker 2: A lot of people I know people who won't use
the microwave. I believe that. Yeah, Bobby Bones would not. Never. Yeah,
so anyway, I don't I don't know. I don't run
in these paranoid circles of things. I just figured it's maintenance,
and I'll go and I'll have it done, and I'm
assuming everything will be fine.
Speaker 4: I just try to cut down and everything that could poison.
Speaker 2: Me and we'll just uh and we'll move on. We'll
move on from there. Why don't we take just a
short minute break and then we'll come back. I want
to talk a little bit about there's something that went
on this past week that I think goes transcends and
I think it's a good thing for everybody to kind
of look at themselves and sort of go, oh, yeah,
that's what life is, that's what you know, that's what
makes you a stronger person. We'll see, all right, Maybe
you'll think it's not the same as me, but we'll
get to it. We'll find out right after this. Ever,
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I always see this. This is a song about.
Speaker 4: With the Russians too, with the Russians.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it was with the Russians too. I love the song.
Speaker 3: It's like a poor man's Billy Jordan.
Speaker 2: I was scambling in her bad I told a risk
I can hear it that. Yeah, I love I love
this song. I don't know yours Guttingendboddy Dad, because yeah, this.
Speaker 1: I mean a sudden basket somehow between the lock and
the hardness.
Speaker 2: And my luck. I love what there's one line in here.
I just I've been waiting for it.
Speaker 4: Now, didn't you record now? Mark before he died, he
knew he was gonna die, and.
Speaker 2: Joy every sandwich.
Speaker 4: I'm a test man, Senniers, guns and money.
Speaker 2: The ship has hit the fan.
Speaker 4: The ship has hit the fan.
Speaker 2: I don't know why. It's such a simple song, and
I go, I fucking get this. It's so I can
so relate to this song.
Speaker 4: Is he the one who came up with that phrase? No? Oh, okay,
because like a lot of times, artists won't use cliches.
Speaker 2: Yeah, then, uh yeah, it's funny. My head's in so
many places and I'm I'm I'm a fucking I'm kind
of a mess inside inside me. Today. I had a
very good day, as I said, but I have a lot.
There's a lot, and uh yeah, probably I think need
to I think so. I think I haven't been doing
my rituals of things. I think I've allowed things to
slide a little bit.
Speaker 4: I'm just joking.
Speaker 2: I think that. Yeah, it's interesting. The mental health stuff
for me has been like just a fucking inside I
mean talk about like just going through it. It's like
you're you're you're seeing things, noticing things and all that. Wait,
should I read what I just got? My feedback is
back from my my treatment plan one that I wrote.
Should I read that? Should I read it? On? On
the podcast? Do I do? I do that right now? Yeah? Uh?
Do it?
Speaker 4: In a reporter voice, Bill, it appears that your treatment.
Speaker 2: I don't know where I find that. It took me
right to the thing. Uh uh, I don't know where
she puts it. Wait, maybe they must go in like
uh students and greats. I would assume, right, All right,
let's see you'd assume That's what I would assume. So
I am very very confident you'll master the technical parts
of the treatment plan with more practice. Uh oh, oh
my god, I did terrible. I got a seventy five.
Well that wasn't what I come on.
Speaker 4: Yeah, this week just keeps getting better, is it? Maybe
we should wait till after.
Speaker 2: I got the correct diagnosis with all the specifiers.
Speaker 4: However, you recommended pross diglibrium partially some Oh fuck I jah, Hey,
they don't.
Speaker 3: Do well well? You hold yourself to a high standard or.
Speaker 2: Not developed with client all objectives. I'm gonna have to
go through this. I'll fucking nail the next one. All Right,
I look at it this way, and this is great
because it kind of ties into what I'm saying. Writing
a treatment plan is a challenge. It really is, and
I think it's a challenge for anybody in the profession
that's doing it. And since you've never done it before,
I don't usually take like the first I'm not too
worried about it. Like even she said, I'm very very
confident you're gonna get with more practice. There's something I
have said for many, many years is that the more reps,
the better you're going to get at anything if you
really want to do it. And so I think that
I was trying to get this done and get it
done by a deadline, and I probably softened on the
end of it because it has taken me. It took
me so long to write what the diagnosis and the
formulation was, and those were the two best parts of
this thing. From what I just looked at, it would
just brief. But going with that story, So I had
your wife's a teacher kids where we are are off
this week? Yes, So I was looking for something for
my son to do that would I kind of occupy
his time and maybe give him something else to concentrate on,
because I'm just seeing like a lot of cognitive things
that just, you know, worry typical teenager shit, things that
kind of get bigger in your head than they may
really be in reality.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and that goes on to adulthood too.
Speaker 2: Yeah. So I thought, okay, we're going to try this.
So he had agreed that he would he would do this,
and it was going to be three days, and I
think I talked about this. I looked at a couple
of different places, and I figured, you know, I have
the time, and some of them were more expensive than others,
but I found one that was pretty reasonable and plus
I had and it included the equipment, and I needed
to buy helmets and jackets and pants and all this stuff.
And uh so he was a little reluctant then all
of a sudden, because at one point it kind of
became this is what you want me to do, And
I said, well, I thought you'd like it, and you
said you wanted to try snowboarding, so okay, here's the opportunity.
Speaker 3: In the Olympics.
Speaker 2: So we kind of went back and forth throughout this stuff.
I was out of town for the weekend. His mom's
been in town, so she was with him. Uh, and
then she told me on Sunday night, he's very excited
to go on Monday. Now, I don't know if you remember,
but where we're living, Monday was absolutely beautiful. Yeah, sunny,
a little bit warmer. Beth and I went for a run,
did you yes, a run? Yeah? Yeah, okay.
Speaker 3: You usually do wind sprints, which you can't keep up.
Speaker 2: I wish, I fucking wish I was your daghbor. Somebody's everything.
Speaker 4: I'm on like at least seventy five doorbell camps. I
am sure they have identified me as a cross breed.
If you saw that Super Bowl comer, the Golden Retriever.
Speaker 2: And you know some of the dogs, right. So he
we get there and they say get there an hour early.
They'll set you up with all the equipment stuff. Well,
the camp started at nine thirty. I give them a
tremendous amount of credit because it started like nine thirty two.
He was out there, so I go, well, that's impressive
because all these people were coming in and then we
had to go over and get the rental equipment. Man,
they ran it so well, really well run, and but
we were there a little early, and I think he
was anxious and then he now he's fifteen, and the
camp went from eight to fifteen, and he hasn't skied
or snowboarded, but said he wanted to try snowboarding, and
snowboarding is not an easy thing to pick up. It's tough.
And at fifteen he is six five. I mean, he's
like a he looks like a d one tight end.
You know, he's six to two hundred pounds.
Speaker 3: Yeah, baby gronk, Yeah, I.
Speaker 2: Mean, this is this is what the kid looks like.
So we're in there and all these little kids now
show up and most of them are I'm gonna say
the average age is nine of these kids. And I'm like,
and I can tell he's super uncomfortable and the biggest
thing and he and think about this from a teenage perspective.
Try to bring yourself back to being a teenager.
Speaker 4: One of the I'm picturing Dwight from the office when
he was doing karate and he was bragging about how
far he had advanced, and then they show him in
the class and it's him and a bunch of killing
little kids. That's what I'm thinking of Jamison right now. Well,
it's just saying yeah.
Speaker 2: So so I just say that because it is when
you could picture the dynamic, right, I mean, here's the he.
I think if you looked from a distance, you think
he's an instructor with these little kids. Right.
Speaker 3: Oh, he's learning too.
Speaker 2: He's learning too. And you know, man, embarrassment at fifteen
isn't a moment. It's like a life sentence. It just
is with with these things. So he heads out and
I get a call that is mumbled into the phone,
basically going this sucks. I can't get up on the board.
I don't want to do it. I don't know why
people do a sport that will just embarrass them. So
I don't know what to say because I have kind
of wanted to make sure he got out there and stuff.
But I have now put on my own ski boots,
but I've yet to purchase a ticket to go skiing.
So I get another call. I'm done. I'm not doing this,
and I said, okay, you're gonna be mad at me.
He said, no, I'm not gonna be mad at it.
So he comes in and lovely woman that runs it
is with him, and he he smartly just said I
knew I would lose it, like I would lose my
temper and take.
Speaker 4: The board, start hitting.
Speaker 2: And he's like, the instructor didn't want to go down
the road. The instructor didn't want me to quit, didn't
want me to stop. He's like, and I said to her,
I feel like I'm not going to be able to
control myself because I'm getting so angry. And nobody deserves that.
You don't deserve that.
Speaker 3: That's what he said, A mature answer.
Speaker 2: I'm telling you this dude, he has intellectual EQ. He
is dialed in for the emotional EQ.
Speaker 4: Right, so emotional intelligence that's the term.
Speaker 2: So he says, uh, so he comes. So I now
I'm trying to figure out where he is and all
this stuff. And he I run to the instructor and
she said, to your Jamis instead, and I said, I am.
She said, he said, he just wants to sit in
here for a minute. She said snowboarding is really hard.
She goes, people don't realize it, and she said, especially
when you're a big guy. She goes, you know, six
to two, right, And.
Speaker 3: I said, yeah, you got me more like a jockey.
Speaker 2: She's like, well, you could be a big guy like
you know, and I think he's also like, then there's
a little bit of like envy because his cousin, who
is eight, is on an elite ski team at a
resort Maine every weekend. So he's like, why didn't he
get me on skis when I was younger? Right? It
was kind of the thing, and.
Speaker 4: Dad, why didn't you crazy glue skis into my feet
when I was three?
Speaker 2: So I didn't say anything.
Speaker 3: I said the same thing.
Speaker 2: I tried to do skiing with my oldest kid and
it was met with a lot of resistance after he fell.
So whatever, So I don't really answer the question. And
the woman says to me, he did say he may
he just wants to think about it for a little bit.
But I told him he can switch to skiing and
skiing is easier, and I said, okay, great. So I
go and I sit down and I'm and you know,
he's like, you're mad. I said, I'm not mad, but
I don't you know, what do you want to do?
And he's like I he goes, I uh, I think
I'm going to try the ski and I go, okay.
So we wait a little bit, we have something to eat,
We go over get them set up with skis. We
get on skis and he says to me, do I
have to go to the lesson or can I ski
with you? And I said, oh, yeah, you can ski
with me. Now, I don't know where they're going, right,
I'm not that familiar with where we are, and I thought, well,
there's easy trails, and I thought everything was over to
the left. And he's like, no, I want to go
do the magic carpet is what they call it. He goes,
I just want to test this out. So I said, okay.
So it's a good distance to the magic Carpet from
where we are, and it's hot. It's like the sun's
out now, right. I got the shades, the helmet I get.
I'm like, my helmet was soaked with sweat. I can.
Speaker 4: I can, yeah, because it's the combination of it's nice weather,
but you have to put out all the stuff.
Speaker 2: Right, So I have the helmet on. I probably could
have skied just in the sweater, but I got the
sweater and I had like a wick away shirt underneath
that jacking on. Got the pants right, So I say
to him we can carry him. Well, now let's put
him on and we'll go. I said, all right, well
you got to try to like skate with your skis
to get over there. That's not really going anywhere. So
it's kind of walking and we're it's like I said,
it's it's a bit of a distance. So the frustration
is kind of building up because it's a it's more work,
and you can't in skis downhill skis you don't have
like cross country where you can leverage. Right, you're lifting
your foot and your leverage. So I'm trying to show
him the thing. And then finally I just kind of
walk with him a little bit and we passed this
one guy and the guy sees him and he goes, man,
I don't feel so bad now. Now. What I didn't
tell you was when he went out with his group,
I walked out just to kind of make sure he
got off, and it's all these little kids and one
one of the fathers turns to another fund and goes, hey,
I think I saw that guy at the bar last night,
meaning Jamison, you no, I know that, because just like
we were saying, fifteen sixty two hundred pounds looking like that, right,
your d one tight end. So we get over to
finally we get over to the magic carpet and it
The magic carpet is basically a conveyor belt that you
ski onto and it takes you up. It replaces the
old toe rope. If anybody remembers the toe rope, you
used to have a toe rope at our at Our,
at Our.
Speaker 3: I can't beullyeve, I forgot about this.
Speaker 2: I used to ski at the town dump.
Speaker 4: Oh really, Yeah, they put up but it would snow,
it would snow, and they had like I guess, I
guess we did dan Or they did like a landfill
section so it was more of a sturdy ground underneath,
and everything was frozen anyway, and they put a toe
rope in and you they would tell you to.
Speaker 2: Top me ski down. Yeah, it was like bye love
New York. I think it was. I think it was
free like And I had skied cat him out in
all these places Killington when I was kid, but so
at Park City is where I had learned because that's
where my uncle lives. So I I was so okay.
So we uh so we get over to the magic
carpet and now the frustration's going and there's some lank,
colorful language coming out of his mouth, and I get
it and I understand. And it's low. He's not loud,
he's not saying, but I can hear it right, And
I said, hey, watch it because there's little kids around.
I don't care, you know, just frustrated. So now there's
a slight incline to get to the magic carpet. And
I am like, I thought I probably should be behind him,
but the way I'm positioned, I'm now in front of him.
So I say to him, you you want to go
across the hill, lean into it a little bit with
the edge of your skis and just kind of walk
up and so he starts to turn whatever, and he goes,
you give terrible advice, So like, go, okay, do your thing.
So I get up there and there's two little kids.
This thing is built for five year olds in snow pants.
That's what the match of carpet is. But smartly, he's saying,
let me get a feel for the skis on that
little bunny hill. It's not even like it's just a
So I get on it. It's kind of a steep,
little right onto the thing. And I'm looking at this
thing and I go, this is going to grab your
skis right and kind of grab hold. You're not gonna
have any give because it's rubber, but it's it's like
elevated bumps on it that we're open, so it almost
builds a suction. This is what I'm thinking in my head,
and I'm pretty sure that this is what happens, and
so it holds you in place and you just kind
of slide on there. But what happens is when you're bigger,
your skis are a little bit longer, and I'm going
sure for a little kid smaller skis, they ski down
and goes right onto the magic carpet. I ski down,
part of my ski is still on the ramp and
the front of my ski is gonna get pulled, and
I kind of can see this, and I'm thinking, oh boy,
I should be behind him. I get on and there's
a girl, little girl who got on before me, and
then there's a little boy in front of him her
and but evenly spaced out. And then all of a sudden,
Jameson comes on and I hear poor kid, and I go.
I turn around and he's off to the side, skis
up in the air. He's on the side, and I go.
There is nothing more humbling than falling off this thing
that's designed for five year olds. I go, oh my god, right,
and so this is and he's already said, why do
people do a sport that just embarrasses them the whole time?
You know, and there was others like golf? And I go,
I mean and so I I see him. He's frustrated,
and he goes its, yeah, I'm done, and the skis
are off and he's standing down at the bottom of
the hill. I want to get back there as quickly
as possible, just to kind of assess the situation. I
don't know how angry he is, I will say again,
keeps himself in really good check in public, like very
good and self aware. So little kid, the little boy
at the front, he falls getting off the thing and
no one's helping him. And he's off and he's laying
on the ground and he's starting to cry a little
bit and I can hear him. And so they stop
the belt. But the guy at the top doesn't really
do anything, and all of a sudden he goes, hey, hey,
you need help, see the kid. The kid's laying there.
I go, you don't ask, you just got a fucking help, right, Well,
they start the belt up again. So now the girl's off,
but now she stops. So here I come. I'm two
hundred and thirty pounds and I'm coming and I go.
I say to the guy, I go, bro, you got
to stop this thing or move those kids. I go,
because it's not going to be pretty. In a second.
Speaker 4: You got yeah, you're like like Indiana Jones and the ball.
Speaker 2: What the fuck is happening? It's get very wrong. So
I now ski down to Jamison. All right, finally get around,
get around the kids. Ski down. He goes, I'm not
doing it, and I said okay. He goes, I want
to go home, and I said okay, and I think
he kind of waited. I think he started to put
the ski on again. One of them pops a different way,
and he goes, that's it and he walks off. So
now I'm stuck. I'm standing there. I have my skis on,
and I have polls, and he had poles. Whenever I've
learned or taught instructed people with skiing, and then I've
never done it in a formal sense, it's no poles.
But because he was six to two, I kind of
convinced him, like, hey, man, give him the poles, because
if you start to go down and you can dig
with the pole, you can regain your balance. And I
thought that might be a good thing for him, right,
because I'm picturing us like on some other trail on
the sunny day. I got a I got a Disney
fucking ski movie in my head. This is what's happening.
Not the Sonny Bono story, no, no, so right, So now, dude,
he walks off, and I'm there, and I get a call.
You got to help me get these stupid boots off
my feet while I have a bit of a problem
in the fact that I'm trying to juggle you. I'm
skiing down your skis, your poles, my poles, and the
helmet that you left here that you took off as well.
So stand by. I'll get there and forget it. I'll
find somebody to help me, Okay. So I get back
and I walk into the rental place. He's already got
the shoes, his sneakers on, and he walks up to
where he returned the skis and puts them in and
that's it. But meantime, meantime, I forgot this. I did
go buy a ticket. It's a holiday, so the prices
are higher, and I didn't even get on a lift
like there is kind of just like sometimes and I
know it shouldn't be about the money kind of right,
but it was like just kind of burning the money
to me, and I was a little bit like. So
I said to hey, man, I'm going to take a run.
I said, maybe more than one, but I go, I'm
going to take a run, and he goes, all right, fine,
So I said, okay, you go sit in the lodge.
So he went in there and I went up and
I go, I'm just going to do an easy trail.
And the reason I want to do the easy trail
one I haven't been on skis in about about a
year and two years, two years, and prior to that
it had been many years. So these are now my
skis and last skis I were on. When I went
and I skied in another state. I rented, so I
wasn't bringing my own these. I got all tuned up
and I figured, well, it's fine, I could probably do
I'm definitely not doing Black Diamond, but so I go,
maybe I can talk to him again. And there's this
easy trail kind of goes around the side of the mountain.
I saw the map and I go perfect, and I'm
going down and I'm skiing, and I see a mom
and two kids go by, and it is sunny and
it is absolutely fucking gorgeous. I actually stopped at one
point and I reached in my pocket because I was
going to take a picture, and I went, oh, my god,
I don't know where my phone is.
Speaker 4: Oh that's yeah, that's nerve wracking.
Speaker 2: Nah. I figured maybe that's maybe that was the greatest gift,
that I'm not getting any deck. Come on, I want
to go. I don't know that that's happening, And actually
it wasn't. So I ski all the way down and
I'm like, god, I really would love to do another run.
That was such a nice run, and really, what are
you doing? It's like a probably if I stopped, I
think it took me five minutes to get to the
bottom of the mountain from the top if that, so,
I thought I could do one more. And then I'm like,
I should probably really find my phone. So I ski over,
get everything off, I find him and I go, hey, man,
I can't find my phone. He goes, what I said,
I can't find my phone. I said, maybe you can
use I. He goes, you don't share your location with me.
I said, oh, I thought I did. I don't know,
so I said to him, I think it's in the
rental place. We go in the rental place, he sees
my phone, he grabs it, and he goes to me.
Apparently this is the safest place in America. So I
we pack up and we go home. So I got
one ski thing in for whatever the dollars right, And
I'm like, eh, go home. And I figure that's it.
No more like he's not going to do it. And
I had paid for the three days, and I his
mom had paid for the three days. And I thought, well, look,
I'm glad he tried it. And I said to him,
I'm you know, trying something new is tough. I said,
I know you think that. I'm I like force you
into things, because that had come up. And I said,
here was my thinking. Sometimes we could talk about meditation
to people, and it's really hard to do if you're
not practicing it for a long period of time and
consistently doing it. And I said, but one of the
things I always loved. And I realized at a fairly
young age that was when I was doing something that
maybe label an extreme sport or kind of on the edge,
whether it was drag racing a car, or or racing
around Watkins Glen or doing anything like that. You can't
think of anything else when you're going into like turn
one at Watkins Glen and trying to you know, you've
watched all the pros where they break, and you're going
to try to break late into it. You're not thinking
about the bills that are due, or the stress that's
on or the seventy five you just got on an assessment. Baby,
you know what I'm saying.
Speaker 4: You're thinking about I got to make sure I got it.
Speaker 3: Or I will die or that.
Speaker 2: But you're thinking, you're so like in lockdown, you're in
the moment you are. I don't think you're any more president.
And I really think like skiing or snowboarding in particular,
it's going to take a lot of your focus and
not allow any other thoughts in your head. And that
was sort of my thing, and I said that that's
why I thought it. So the next day I the
plan was that this mom was going to take him down.
She's in town and he gets up and he goes, yeah,
I'll do it, and I went okay. So he goes
back down and I get a video later on of
him skinned down a mountain. Oh, and I went hot, damn,
look at this. And I thought, resilience is one of
the things that I don't think we talk about enough
because just like the greade I got, now, right, it's
fallen off the conveyor belt. Right, you can make that
same analogy. And I know that, Okay, I'll look through
what I did wrong, and I'll go back and I'll
do it again. And that's just the way you do it,
and just like anything, it's wraps. So I was so
really really i'll say proud for him. I don't like
the proud of him kind of, but proud for him,
not about the skiing, but about the fact that together
you were you did not want to be publicly embarrassed.
Even said to me. At times, especially with the snowboarding,
I felt like I saw kids my age laughing at
me from the chairlift. Maybe they were, maybe they were not,
I don't know, but in his mind it was. And
you know, grown men, grown men hate being bad at something.
Think of yourself. I'm not saying you, but but there's
plenty right you hate being bad at something right, it's frustrating.
I think golf for many guys is that right. They're
not great at it, and then they have a friend
who is pretty good at it, and it's like why
is this and they get frustrated, and guys lose their
fucking mind. Clubs get thrown like yes, I feel less
than yes one hundred percent one hundred percent. So that
was that was the thing. And then the other thing
that that kept coming to me was you know you
can quitting. It didn't really quit, you knew you had
hit your limit. And this is where I always think,
like you got to give kids to a certain degree,
at a certain age. He's fifteen, autonomy and let them
kind of leads you a little bit because I'm not
in that body and I'm not going to be the
dad and goes, come on, man, you know how much
I spec I don't. Yeah, that doesn't work. I got
that when I was I got it. Do you know
the money I spend?
Speaker 3: It's not motivation. That's manipulation.
Speaker 2: Well it is, or it isn't, but it's also front.
It's a and I get it. It's a frustration. You
just laid out all the things you could have done
for you or your wife or whatever or the family
you loaded into this, and now somebody's just going I'm done,
and I because it's quitting and you can quit or
he can regroup. Now he did say to me when
we got the skeis, he goes, I don't want to
quit it anything, he goes. But that was really hard.
And I know snowboarding is hard, and I'm aware of it.
I've never done it, so but I've talked to people
like my cousin was a great skier, said, oh my god, snowboarding.
It's because it took me forever like to learn it.
And she lives in Park City. So I'm like, okay,
So I was really And then the other thing is
I think that we talk about building self esteem in
kids and how important that is, and to me, I
don't know how you exactly do that, because blowing sunshine
up a kid's ass is not building self esteem in
my opinion. Maybe I'm wrong. Then what, well, it's not
that it's yes, okay to a certain to a certain point, yes,
but you know, telling the kid, hey, you can do this,
all that stuff is great. But on the other side,
it's when they do do it. How good they feel
that they conquered something that they challenge themselves. They knew
when to stop and at least, you know, my kid
and decided to go back. I thought that was like amazing,
and I said to him, I I so, then there's
a family group chat, and I think my mother writes
because I so his mom's down at this ski place yesterday.
I get a video of him skiing, and I said,
ask him if I can share this on the family chat.
I think it's great and he says yes. So I
put it in there and my mother goes so much
for the snowboard, so much snowboarding huh or something to
that effect. Oh so it's from of the snowboarding, and
I'm like, I don't think she even meant it. And
there's no tone, right yeah, So in my head it's
a snarky maybe a snarky or just kind of these
I hear my grandmother going, oh man, they didn't like
the snowboarding. Maybe that's okay, that's what I hear. So
I just write back, I'm really really happy and proud
for him because I'm really hoping this is a great
lesson in resiliency doing hard things and a self esteem builder.
And then he says to me later, he goes, you know,
I'm on the group family group chat too, you know that,
And I forgot, but I don't say that. Damn. I go, yeah,
I know, I go, I would say these things to you.
I said, I do have a problem with that. So look,
I there's also a part where sometimes you can't be
coached by a parent. I didn't even get to really coach.
Don't forget the magic carpet took him out and that
was it, you know, And I think there too, he's
saying to me, why is that guy who's running the
thing sitting on his cell phone? Shouldn't you help me?
I go, I don't know, so I go, this is
what happened to mean? Lifties like, that's what they are. Like.
I remember I was in park sitting and I was
debating on staying, and I thought I could get a
job at one of the ski resorts and somebody goes,
you'd be He goes, yeah, they'll they'll make you a
lifty at least, And you know, a lifties are usually
these burned out guys. They got great tands because they're
in the song an all fucking day reflecting off the snow.
They probably won't put anything in their face to have
melanoma by the time they're sixty. And uh, they just
sit there smoking dope and going man, put put put
the put thet put the thing down when you get
up there thing, yeah right, because they always say so. Uh.
I just thought that was fucking great. And I don't know,
sometimes you can't be coached by parents. So last night,
he says, he was really excited and he said to me,
can you and I go tomorrow? And I said yeah, yeah,
and he goes, no, no, I want to ski with
you tomorrow. And I said, okay, So I will.
Speaker 4: Tell you see how it goes.
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Speaker 4: You proper, but I'm a food and.
Speaker 2: I don't s me looking better.
Speaker 4: Man I'm not there while she pours herself out some
strange I poured.
Speaker 2: Myself a drain something she I could say, I'm drinking them.
You know who this is come a day, go back
to the classic country daddy. I drowned that he's active single.
I'm drinking double. Oh I can see him, Yeah you can.
This isn't Glenn Campbell. No, his name does begin with
a G though. Oh, you're gonna get it drinking. His
first name is the same as a Major League baseball
well a professional Baseball Hall of Famer has the same
first name as him, and the professional Baseball Hall of
Famer's last name is Carter. What's his first name? Oh? Gary,
there you go. Come on, come on, Danny, you.
Speaker 4: Grew up with I know, I know, I know music.
Speaker 2: I know he has a picture. I played this sof YouTube.
He's got a picture of himself in front of Kmart.
Speaker 4: Saying Gary, I'm drinking dubble Stewart.
Speaker 2: Oh, Gary Stewart, Gary Stewart. There's a warning. Children left
behind will be sold in the circus. This may have
been Gary Stewart's only hit. I don't know. I don't
even know if it was a hit. I found the
song amusing and relatable for many many people. I'm sure
I think that was the connection with country, right, Yeah,
they told the story. They were clever, and they were
clever and it was more.
Speaker 3: Now it's formula. It's pretty formula.
Speaker 2: Okay, I think some of it. I think some of it.
I know, we call what is it now, bro country,
we call it or something like that, something like that. Yeah,
I think. I don't. I don't mind it at all,
some of the stuff. All right, So where I left
you was Jamison like, I'm not sure what's going to
happen here, right, I don't know where it's going to go.
Back out in the father tea, this is where it is.
And I thought, like the emotional recovery speed that this
kid made because he didn't want to embarrass himself, right
it was. He wasn't quitting forever. He was just quitting
for that day, regrouping and returning. And I go, boy,
there's lessons in that, like life lessons, because no matter what,
you could give up on something and you could get
defeated by it, or you can take it and go Okay,
I now know what to do. I now figured it out.
And he was there was a kind of a seasoned
I'll call him a ski instructor who just had a great,
big personality. And that's who he ended up with. And
I don't know what they did, but they they got him.
He said, I don't want to go back to the group.
Can I go with you? So we go down there
and it's raining today. It was raining the whole way
down in the morning. So we get there but it's
a light rain and he gets the skis. He's excited.
We go out, we were going, and we get and
he's telling me on the chairlift and the start yelling
at me because I didn't put the bar down. I
never had put the bar down the thing put the
thing do? I never put the bar down in these
but this was it was called the beginner hill, and
it's not a bunny hill by any stretch. It's actually
a nice run. And he had skied it, so I
kind of follow him down, did a great job. We
see the instructor. Instructor goes, hey, I just watched you.
You look like you've improved since yesterday. So guy's been
on skis once for a couple hours and he and
he figured it out, like I go, boy, I hope
that just shows you that. And I said to him
in a chairlift, this is like there's a difference between
quitting something and then regrouping on it. And I go,
I just hope you realize that no matter what you
want to do, you can do it. It may take
a day, may take it a little bit longer than
you want it to. It won't take that long, but
maybe longer than you wanted to. And I think, you know,
we can do this, so uh he did. He recalibrated,
and the man was he was skiing great. And then
the rain let up for a little while and a
little granular or not bad. And then I said, I thought,
we're going over to that. When he goes, do you,
he goes, I'm not ready for that. So I said,
all right. So we do the beginner one a couple
of times and then he says to me, you want
to go down there? And I said yeah, and I said,
it's a nice trail. I said, it's an easy trail.
We go down there, and I don't know. I sometimes
I guess I don't know how to to parent. I
don't even know. I just I figured we jump in.
So we get on the chair left and we're going
up the mountain and he goes, where is this And
I said, well, we're going to go around the side.
He goes, dat and he's looking down. These are black diamonds.
I said, okay. He goes, I hate you. I said,
I wouldn't put you in this situation. I don't think
you can handle I said, I've been skiing with you
now for almost an hour and a half. You have
it down. You can handle this. I don't know. And
this is where it's like mind over matter at anything
in life, because I always figure I'm going to get
to the bottom of the hill and I'm not gonna fall.
I don't even think about that. I don't. Again, there's
a difference between fifteen and confidence at fifty four or
fifty five. It's just different. And it's not cockiness. It's
just I just go I'm gonna do it. If I
don't do it, then that's on me. But still I
don't think there's gonna be any I don't even let
those thoughts enter my head. I'm going all day lining.
I'm going this is going to be the best day
ever because I get to spend time with him doing
something that I've always enjoyed that he hasn't done. Oh
this is fucking coolest shit man. Even if it's raining,
who cares so? And there was hardly anybody there because
of the rain, but they were still had their classes
and stuff. So we're, you know, we're on that big
chairlift going to the top of the mountain and he's
getting more and more in evers and I said to him,
you can't think about it. You just got to do it.
You just do it. And so there's more like, oh
my god, Dad, look at and some kid, some kid
does a spicctacular wipeout. I mean, it's a fucking yard sale, right,
And he's like, oh my god. I said what he said?
Did you see that I had? But I was pretending
I hadn't. I go, oh, yeah, he's fine. I said,
you're gonna be fine. And we're not going down that mountain.
Where are we going? I go, relax. So we get
up there and now and he said to me the
first time he gets I have trouble getting off the chairlift.
And I said, did I ever tell you? In Park City,
I was twelve and I was with my cousin who
was seven, and I said to her, as we got
to the top, do you need help getting off the chairlift?
And their chairlift's kind of booked in park City, right,
and she said yes. So I went to kind of
scoop her down, and she just hops down and skis off,
and I'm still in the chair and it goes again.
I'm stuck in the fucking thing, and the guy goes
because now you're like, right, yeah, yeah, you're gonna have
to ride all the way down. I felt like such
a loser at twelve, So I get everything that Jamie's
to say, right, So I'm like, okay, So I'm thinking,
you've already used the resiliency muscle. You've come this far,
You're gonna be fine. What I had noticed was like
to go slow. If I'm gonna do old man skiing
on something, I'll just go, you know, across the mountain.
And there was like nobody there, because a lot of
times you kind of are in danger of you know,
some hot dog coming down and taking me out like
a bowling pin. Which I have been the hot dog
who's taking somebody out like a bowling pin a catamount
many many years ago. But that wasn't gonna happen, And
so I figured we could just do some back. Well,
what I'm not realizing is he's not confident enough really
in his turning like that. He just kind of goes
down and does little little bit. So he says to
me when we get off, and he had said, I
have trouble getting off these. He was doing beautifully on
the other one. He did great on this one. And
he looks and he goes, oh, is that where we're going?
I said yeah. He goes, oh, this is great. I said, yes,
that's what I told you. So I want to give
him instruction. I'm like, let's stop here, let's stop here,
let's regroup right so you can see what's coming, because
it's a path you're not familiar with, what I said,
I go, why don't. He's like, I got my I
got my music in. I said, okay, So he's at
this point, no, he said, and it's like he's excited, right,
and so we he's he's like way ahead of me,
and I'm just watching right to make and then he
he starts picking up speed and I go, oh boy,
and he's fine. We go round this nice turnout and
now you've come to a point in the mountain where
you're gonna go down, and it's one of the places
that he thinks he can't just by looking at it,
can't handle. And I'm saying bullshit to that idea. You
can absolutely fucking handle that. And it's just a little
bit down and then you're off the mountain, right, you
get back on the chair lift. So but he never stops,
like the whole time, he's just going right and it's
not necessarily he's not, you know, a little bit of
a snowplow less less so than yesterday. Right, and he's
seeing me and I'm not a great skier by any
stretch of the imagination, but I can keep my skis
together and you know, just do the stuff, and you know,
I'll do a slide if I really wanted to. I
could give you a big rooster tail like I used
to do to all my friends. And I can still
do it at fifty four to fifty five years old.
That's fucking great. So we're a code down and he
says something about to me as we get there, but
he never stops like I want him to stop. And
yet at the same time, I don't want to raise
my voice and be like stop, you know, because it's
gonna echoes her out, and I'll tell you a story
about last night that happened. So we he goes down
and he's going, and he's going, and all of a sudden,
he's not going. And I don't know if he decided
that he didn't think he could handle the rest of
the hill. It gets a little bit steep, but it's
not that bad. And I kept saying to him, just
go back and forth across. It's really easy. Just even
if you have to, you know, go back. But he
doesn't want to do because he's seeing kids his age.
He doesn't want to do.
Speaker 3: He doesn't want to look like.
Speaker 2: He doesn't want to do the plow. And then he's
got a friend of his who's sending him videos of
him at Bristol doing flips off jumps or skiing backwards.
And I go, okay, but he didn't start like that,
and you started yesterday. I don't let that in your head.
The same thing with like Miya said, it is in
my head now. I'm very upset. I have never gotten
a grade that low in grad school. I am frustrated
with that, but I can't let it get in my head.
I got a regroup come back and go these were
my mistakes. Boom, I'm back, baby. This is a tough class.
But the same thing with him. So, man, I don't
know if he wiped out or if he fell on purpose.
I have no idea. And I come skiing up and
I make sure I'm not spring any snow in him.
So I stopped this way and I say I'm about
to say, can I help you? And he goes, I
am so angry at you. I hate you. And again
it's because he had been doing so well right and
now it feels like defeat, and I get it. And
we could say it's male ego or whatever. There's nobody
around to even see a fall. So I said, he goes,
just just just leave me and go to the bottom,
and I said, fine, So I did. So. Now I'm
down there and I see him trying to get the
skis on, and I want to yell up, go across
the mountain to get your skis on. No, Now he
can't get him on. One bounces off, one starts to slide.
He's like, I can see his feet go up. He's kicking,
just mad and he uh, he's going it broke, it's broken. Okay,
Now he's skiing with no polls today, so that was
that was great. And I'm like, I, if I had
this kid regress, I'm gonna feel awful because that was
not the point of this. And you could and and
I will argue that you could have handled this. So
he is not happy. And we get to the bottom
and he and he's yelling to me, I'm done, I'm done.
We're going to the car, and I go, okay, I
I unfortunately have the same make up as you. Like.
He's probably the most like me. And none of these
guys are, you know. And by the way, they're all big.
So when you're big and you make noise, people notice
Jackson sixty seven, Jordan's not tall, but he's bulky and muscular.
He's lifted, you know, he's a powerlifter. And then I've
got Jamison, who is gonna probably be a very very
tall guy. So I'm like, I don't wanna. I don't
want to do anything that's gonna embarrass you. I don't
want you man. So he's just packed his skis up
under his arm and he walks down right and he goes,
I am so angry at you, And I said, okay,
and he goes, you know, I'm going if I do
this again, I'm going over there and if you stay
over here. I go, well, I wanted to ski with you. Well,
I don't want to ski with you. I'm going come on, man.
So I said, why don't we go inside? And I said, uh.
He goes, what So now I'm behind? He goes, what
are you doing? I said, I'm gonna go in and
have a hot chocolate that. Do you want one? He goes,
I want nothing? Okay, And I get it right. It's
all the frustration I did it. There's something about adolescence
and humiliation that just don't go together. And I will
tell you, like, a public failure at fifteen is like catastrophic.
It really is. You think everybody's noticed this.
Speaker 3: Everybody's watching you.
Speaker 2: Oh, turning red?
Speaker 4: You want to crawl into a hole and die.
Speaker 2: Yes. And here's the other thing I think these kids.
Maybe I'm wrong. I never asked this, but you're worried
in the back of your mind someone has filmed you
and you're gonna be going through reels someday and you're
the loud Oh, you're gonna be the meme, you know
what I mean? Or whatever nowadays. I mean, yeah, that's
something we didn't have to worry about. I just wonder
if that's a real thought. I didn't ask, I didn't
say anything. We go inside and uh, he's already sitting
down by the time I get my skis off and
get in there. And I say to him, I was
gonna get hot talk that do you want one? And
he's like, I'll have a coke. I said great, And
then I'm thinking it is kind of warm and wet,
and I don't really want to hot chocolate him more.
I'll have a coke too, So then I decide maybe
he needs to eat. So we get chicken fingers and
fries and he eating. We had eaten breakfast, so and
then he finishes up and he goes, I'm sorry, and
I said, you know have fathers. He says, no, how's
that a lie? I go, it's all right. We're trying
something new. I said, it's hard to try something new
and you're out of your comfort zone. He goes, can
we go back to that other hill? And I said yeah.
He goes, come on, you're gonna be mad. I said,
I don't gonna be mad at all. I said, my
whole thing is I want to do this to you,
And I said to him, And this is where I
don't know where this evening really came from for me,
because I did do a lot of cool things with
my dad. But my dad, when we had gone to
Park City when I was twelve, put on skis and
was going toward the chair lift and slipped and fell
and threw a fing it and started and yelled, screamed,
I hate the sensation of sliding, and the skis were off,
and he never put them on ever again. He spent
the rest of the week that we were there in
the lodge with my younger brother, who was about three
at the time, so he just played with him. That
was it. And I never made anybody uncomfortable. I learned
to ski. We did our whole thing. So I said
to him, I go, I gotta tell you something, dude,
this I am so happy to be doing something with
my son that my dad never did with me. Right. Yeah.
And it wasn't like he didn't try. He took us
to Park City, so I'd let let's start there. He
just wasn't. He just was a skiing and that's fine.
He knew what he wanted to do and I thought,
you know, even in that bad weather, it was just bad.
So then he says to me, uh, maybe we could
go back. I could probably handle that hill. And I said, well,
if you want to, and he was like, do you
mind if we just keep doing this one. So now
we're coming down and a guy comes tight and hits
a jump that's along the side of the trail, and
I see Jamison and I know me and I know
my kid, and I go, he's going to try to
do it, and he goes lining up and then I
can tell at the last minute a moment flashed, I
can't do this, and it is so seriously in our
head because I can see his whole body change from
crouch skiing like he was going to nail this. I felt,
or anyone's in the eye, or you're gonna And sure enough, boom,
he's like all over. And I said to him, he goes, ah,
I tried to I said, I saw you did. I go,
I know I know that whole feeling like that guy
can do it, so can I. And then at the
last minute he goes, maybe I can't, I should yeah,
And so like you know, all of a sudden, now
the skis aren't together. And then I said to him,
put him across the mount I know what I'm doing,
and got him on skied down and the rest of
the day was great, and then it started to really
rain and we decided to call it after that. But
it was like, you're rewriting a memory with the kid,
and I thought that was it was pretty pretty uh,
pretty freaking awesome. You know.
Speaker 4: Yeah, that's something you'll look back at, you'll laugh about it,
you'll tell stories. But at the same time, you know,
I mean, it's it's one of those things where, hey,
you didn't quit. You you kept trying and trying, and
that's that's part of growing up.
Speaker 2: Yes, forgive me, Yes, it is part of growing up.
It's part part of life in general. I hope that
when other things seem hard for you, no matter how
frustrated you are, you know, when I've had my fil
for today, but I'm not giving up on this. And
I don't know what the difference was. I said to him,
what was the difference between you? He goes, I don't know.
I don't know, and then I then you start to go,
maybe you shouldn't be your kids coach.
Speaker 3: Well, you just got seventy five of that says, I'm
so upset that.
Speaker 2: You don't even know.
Speaker 4: Ah, Well, it wasn't coaching. It was going through a
life experience with them and letting them figure out, yes,
they're failure right on their own, or as you've been
taught in your in your post college career. Now you
got to sit with them in it. You got to
sit in the stall. Well, you got to sit in
the suit. But I wasn't really even trying to do that.
Speaker 2: I was just letting you kind of figure this out,
take your way through it. We've had a tough week ourselves.
I think that you know, mom who's not normally around
is around. I'm not saying that that's a please don't yeah,
God forbid. It sounds like I'm saying something negative about that.
I'm not. I'm just saying that it's another dynamic. I
think it plays on emotions and things, and it's hard
and and we've been doing more things together, and I
think it's all been great. It's all been great. It's
been a lot, but it's been great. And I don't know,
it's like, in a way, I go, it's sort of
like a generational repair. Here we are together doing something
and I said to him, I'm really happy to you
do something that I love to do. And I go,
I would love to do it more. And he's like, yeah,
I'm good. I said, well, we can come back here,
or we can go to some place. House goes, Let's
go to some place house. They said, you're not going
to be familiar with the trails, so it may be
a little bit just like, no, I think I can.
I can do that, you know. And a lot of
this is like you can see the masculine like, you know,
fuck this shit, I'm not gonna embarrass myself in front
of everybody. I totally can get that. And just the
the identity of yourself figuring it out, and the strength
you have to come back from that stuff, the recovery speed,
and then just kind of a fatherhood moment. It was
nice and it was fucking great.
Speaker 4: The length of time that you have when you're younger,
how the moment lasts longer. Like I remember being in
like I remember being kindergarten, first grade, like, oh man,
it's got to take forever to get the sixth grade.
Then you get the sixth grade, they're like, okay, well
I got six more years of school, right, and then
I'll get to my freshman Yeah, it's going to take
a while before I graduate. And those seem like those
eighteen years took forever. Yes, it seems like. And then
but in there moments of embarrassment when you're growing up
in your adolescence, you know, the life experience, you're dealing
with hormones, and every moment seems to last twenty times
longer than it really does. And then when you get
to be older, you're like, yeah, whatever.
Speaker 2: Yeah, well embarrassment doesn't happen as much as forty five. Yeah,
because even if you fail, you laugh it off yourself
or something or learn or you deal with it. But
that's just it. And that was what I wanted. Embarrassment
is not identity, no, right, It's a moment. The problem
is that now embarrassment for some camera is not a moment.
It becomes social media meme as you said, or something else,
and that is like permanent humiliation versu a moment. And
I think that that plays in a kid's head, you know.
And I think there's a lot of times, you know,
even as parents can try to protect kids from discomfort,
and I think you kind of I don't know. I
don't know. I think you rob them of confidence when
you do that, when you try to protect, protect, protect.
I wasn't so much that way on my own. There
were a lot of things I did, Like, you know,
I wouldn't show up to certain things when the police
were there doing taking care of a potential bad guy,
and all the parents were going to go running up
so their kids would come out, and I kept going,
I'm not going. I'm not going. It became a bone
of contention. I go, I go, you are a piece
of cholesterol in the way of professionals who are trying
to take care of a job. I go, But what
are the kids are going to think? I go, They're
going to think nothing, because they all have little g I.
Joe things and the guns and it doesn't matter. And
even if they are, we handle it when they get
home and we just don't make a big deal about it, right.
And that wasn't good enough, because the whole street went
right up to school when this one thing happened, and
I didn't go, I'm not doing it. I'm not doing it.
I don't know why I have that thing and that,
and and for me, it's like learn to skin your
knee on the playground and you figure it out. How
many right, how many times I'll figure out. I think
it's I think the timing on this is like almost divine.
I get the grade that I've never gotten that low,
and and and I will say every other professor is
that she's one of the hardest ever. I had her
last semester too, and I got progressively better with her.
And even here she goes, I have every cop Yeah,
I'm gonna get me fun Yeah, yeah, but I'm exactly
It's just the same thing with skiing, and I go, boy, here,
I almost want to tell Jamison, hey, Bud, I did
something and I just I just fucking booted it on
the carpet ride. I'm gonna come back, you know. And
I think also, like when you're dealing with a teenage kid,
you can't respond to the anger moment. You got to
listen to them, all right, because a lot of times
we take like, don't talk to them, don't talk to
me that way, And what does that do? This is
like funny.
Speaker 4: I think my father realized that at a certain age.
I think my grandmother got to him. She goes, have
you met your kid? Have you met your son, and
he's like, what do you mean? Because my father was
one he was the youngest of but he was the
alpha of the family, so he told everybody if. Finally,
one time, my oldest uncle, his oldest brother, told me,
you can't talk to your mother like that, because he
would talk down to my grandmother, his mother like he
knew better than she did. And finally she got through said, hey,
have you met your son? The kid's never in trouble
and you're worried about him going on in Halloween of
all people you know. And I think at that point
he kind of had an epiphany. He's like, yeah, maybe
I don't have to be so hard now. He would
put the fear of God in all of us. And
to the point where my brother Ryan, who listens to
this podcast regularly down in Tampa, will tell you a
story which I told when I spoke in his graduation.
He's a kindergarten and we were all naive kids, and
some kid dared who was like, dare to pull that
fire alarm? So my brother Ryan doesn't know any better.
He goes, Okay, well what's that and he pulls it?
And now our school K through twelve was all connected,
so the whole building got the fire alarm, and it
was like around two point fifteen. The high school got
out of two thirty two at that point. Now it's
like two fifteen they get out. Well, so the entire
school's getting out, and even the principles like, do we
have a fire because it wasn't scheduled. The fire trucks
are showing up at the school, right, so we're all like, ah, yeah, whatever.
So I get home from school afterwards, my father goes,
your brother's got you beat because I was called nine
one one looking for my father because he came home
late from church and I couldn't.
Speaker 3: We didn't know where he was.
Speaker 4: And well, my brother had pulled the fire alarm and
he's got blue ink all over his home because it
marks you when you pull it if you're pulling a prank.
So we're thinking that the principal got in his face,
and then he goes, I think I called my fight.
I think I might have scare him, So listen, don't
don't get angry with him.
Speaker 3: He got dared by a kid.
Speaker 4: It was an accident, but he's probably a nervous wreck
when he gets home. He's probably has he so you know,
if you want to bring it up to him or whatever.
He's like coaching my father. My father gets a kick
out of this. He's laughing and he's come a long way.
But my brother Ryan had always seen him be like
a big Jurassic Park dinosaur when he got angry. So
he's coming home, said, I got pigs and needles.
Speaker 3: We'll get to the dinner table.
Speaker 4: Fabaly goes, Okay, don't say nothing. Don't say nothing.
Speaker 3: Okay, Hey Ryan, you know I was school today.
Speaker 4: I didn't mean it didn't mean.
Speaker 3: What Ryan, what's the matter. We're like giggling.
Speaker 1: I kind dared.
Speaker 2: The principal. Yeah.
Speaker 4: My dad's starts laughing. They realize this is so stupid.
This is just the poor little kid got dared.
Speaker 3: They didn't know it better.
Speaker 2: I know. It's so funny kids still do that. Because
we're in We're on one chair lift and I hear
this little kid voice yelling, hey you guys, hey guys, hey,
truth or dare I have no idea? They're talking to
me and Jamison. It's this little girl who's going to
the top of the mountain. We were going on some
other trail and she's yelling to us truth or dare
truth dare? So Jameson goes dare and she goes, I
dare you to jump off the chairlift. James's like, Okay,
I don't know, dude. I The only thing I would
say to anybody is confidence isn't the absence of falling
or failing. It is deciding that the fall or the
failure was not the end of you. And I think
that's probably the greatest thing. And I hope he learned
a lesson in that today. And I think everybody once
in a while you can take a step back and
go yeah, and it's you know, it wasn't about skiing.
It was about to me building that confidence and happened
the father son time, and I think that I'm hoping
it connected with him. And we have not had a
not had a great week, but we had a week.
So there you go.
Speaker 4: Will uh will those teachable moments?
Speaker 2: Uh? Yeah, I would say that that's what it was us.
Speaker 4: That for your assessment.
Speaker 3: Mmmm, here's what I learned today for extra credit.
Speaker 2: I don't think I'm doing I don't think I'm doing
as good this semester. No, No, I don't.
Speaker 3: Why do you think that is? I put on my
tweet jacket and help you out. I coach for about ten.
Speaker 2: I know, I know we make fun of that. Did
you really Yeah? Yeah, behind your back. Of course we did.
I'm sure you did. Yeah, me and Tommy.
Speaker 4: Yeah, oh god, I'm sure you got hours out of
that hours.
Speaker 2: We didn't do it. I don't think we did it
on air.
Speaker 4: No, it wasn't on air, No, because it started after
you left.
Speaker 2: Oh so we used to text each other. Yeah, I
think there was a suicide and as it's and one
of us would text the other going. I think it
was one of the We would do that all the
time though about anything.
Speaker 4: I know, but that was Yeah, that's just how that's
how it was.
Speaker 2: Yes, I think I think it was. Uh, that's funny. No,
I don't think I'm doing as well this semester I have.
I think it's I gotta do the proverbial lock in.
I'm behind in some assignments. I I think that I
haven't been giving things the time they need, and I
think that that you're at a more critical point. I
can do a lot of the stuff pretty well, but
there's nuances to it. And I keep saying in one class,
and I think it's pissing the professor off because a
it's a therapy session, it's more group. And I said
one day when they were going around, after this guy
did his he led the group and then everybody takes
a break and comes back and we debrief how did
he do right? And there's a lot of self assessment
in being a counselor, which has been not easy for
me to go back and dig through shit. And I
said one of because there was like little things. I go,
if you're so into the formatics in your head, you're
going to be checking off boxes and not bringing yourself
to the session. And I think that's more important. And
the professor goes, oh, well, yep, yep. I mean that's
the art, right, trying to bring you into the formatics.
Then it was I was presenting this week, but I
was they had us in teams. This guy went solo,
so I'm in a team with somebody, and I don't
think we did as well. I mean I don't think
if you were watching it you would know, but we
didn't hit a lot of the formatics, and I think
that's gonna ding us. And then the other thing I
thought was if I knew it all, I wouldn't be here, right,
So I'm not going to beat myself up. We're still
early in the semester, but I'm not fucking this up.
So I will be uh yeah, my weekend is going
to be uh. After I blow out mccolon and get
that done, I will be just locked in and unfortunately
just working. But it's been a week, my brother, it
has been a week. We'll take a moment and we'll
lighten it up. We'll find something lighter and happier to do. Dan,
all right, let's do it. No wiping out on the
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Speaker 5: Now what.
Speaker 2: Does he say full stop in?
Speaker 3: THERE i don't know WHAT i.
Speaker 6: Got full stop could BE i don't. Know, yah, huge
that's right.
Speaker 2: Baby have you been watching The?
Speaker 4: Olympics by the, Way i've tried to watch a little
watch a little bit of the hockey On, sunday though about.
Speaker 2: It, YEAH i haven't watched like really much at. All
and THEN i was talking to somebody those days and they,
Go Lindsey, vaughan what is she doing out there with
a Torn she tore a cl and then.
Speaker 4: She was she was attempting to. Comeback she was skiing
and she's qualified for The. Olympics, yeah she.
Speaker 2: Was at The olympics and she, Yes and then she
was coming down and it looked like her poll clipped the.
Gate could that be because of the torn AC i
not being able to keep the. BALANCE i don't, know
BUT i, SAID.
Speaker 4: I gotta give her credit for going out. There well
here because right now her one leg looks like it get, like,
uh it's like satellite.
Speaker 3: TELEVISION i, KNOW i saw.
Speaker 2: That. Uh these are things that did not bring up
to my, son The White, squam BECAUSE i feel like
my knees are buckling a little, bit, Like, oh, no you're,
Fine they're. Fine let's not let's talk. That she's forty,
one probably her Last. Olympics oh, yes, see after he,
Happens i'm going forward. Anyway, YEAH i want to know
that IF i go, OUT i went out giving it my,
all EVERYTHING i, had and she. Did unfortunately she. Did.
Speaker 4: Yeah the thing is the thing that really stunk FOR
nbc And peacock was she was the face of The
olympics Because america doesn't collectively watch. Hockey, right you can,
mark you can march the ten best KNOWN nhl players
through this, room and Maybe kevin might know a few of,
them BUT i mean like they're not they're not like
like it's not like baseball or basketball or. Football everybody
knows what these guys look. Like she was the face
because nobody knew anybody else But Lindsay, Vaughn yvonne Hot
chick skied, right that's exactly WHAT i remember when she was. Here, Yeah,
tiger she looked that. Good but REMEMBER i said to,
YOU i got a picture of my. PHONE i, said
she doesn't look that, hot and you, said are you kidding?
ME i, go you, KNOW i don't think. SO i
look at the scar on her.
Speaker 2: Knees is how he? Say, well, yeah she probably got
what you Know tiger was about in terms of focus and.
Determination and you know WHAT i, MEAN i don't.
Speaker 4: KNOW i Told, ELAN i, said, look you, know you're
the best thing that happened to.
Speaker 3: Me lindsay showed.
Speaker 2: UP i did tell. So on the way, back news
broke of a really tragic thing that happened In Lake.
Tahoe there was an. Avalanche eight people died and one
is still. Missing skiers AND i don't know if they
were hell skiing or. Not are you familiar with hell?
Skiing Chapter, Yeah and it's usually in the. Outback it's
not on groom. Trails you don't really know what you're going,
over and you go with an avalanche. Pack so if
you hit an, avalanche you pull this. Thing it's almost
like A i think it's like a parachute that can
kind of come and cover you and try to give
you space as the snow covers you and you have
a light or a beacon or something that or radio
APP i don't know that they can. Find i'm not
all that. FAMILIAR i GUESS i should look up what's
in an avalanche. PACK i have a computer right in
front of. Me but, yeah eight people are confirmed, dead
with one more skier still. Missing horrific avalanche just outside
of and one man and five. Women. Yeah. Yeah Sheriff
Shannon moon said the avalanche four travel guys and eleven
guests were caught in the. Avalanche among the, fifteen six
had been. Rescued one man in five, women ages thirty
to fifty. FIVE i don't know where they. Were moon.
Said eight of the remaining nine are confirmed dead and
one is still. Missing. Yeah the tour group initially contained
twelve clients and four, guides but one client decided to
back out of the trip at the last. Minute, man
how about? It, no but how about if you're that
guy or that, woman how about if you're one of that, person.
Speaker 4: You got to be incredibly grateful and incredibly.
Speaker 2: Guilty yeah, Right it's like HOW i, mean oh my,
GOD i lost eight of my. Friends unless it was
random people joined in tour guy and, go, Oh i'm
glad that.
Speaker 4: These had to be people of means to do something
like this typically is.
Speaker 2: Case, no, no, No but hang on a, second are they
do they deserve to? Die?
Speaker 4: Oh not at.
Speaker 3: All that's not What i'm. Saying what do you think?
Speaker 2: Of? Mayor? Mom?
Speaker 4: Donnie?
Speaker 1: No?
Speaker 3: Ah, okay oh, gosh all.
Speaker 2: Right.
Speaker 4: No but the point, is, though is that What i'm
trying to say is that people with money tend to
take more risks and do stuff like.
Speaker 2: This, WELL i don't know what they were, doing uh
found after the correspondent with the first respondents using iPhones
sos feature rescue or searching for the nine missing skiers
were hamstrung in the search efforts On wednesday morning after
the area was slammed with nearly two feet of. Snow
i'm trying to see, though if these, GUYS i don't
know what kind of skiing they were. Doing And i'm
sorry That i'm finding this out as we record. This.
UH a video showed a tour guide From Blackbird Mountain
GUIDES uh sifting through snow with his hands to try
to find. People, oh that's. Lovely the avalanche swept down
an elevation of roughly eighty two hundred feet Near Frog.
Speaker 3: Lake is there a way to?
Speaker 4: TEST i, MEAN i wouldn't, Know so this is gonna
sound like it's such an ignorant.
Speaker 3: QUESTION i can't.
Speaker 4: Wait is there a way to test whether or not
something you're gonna have an?
Speaker 2: Avalanche sometimes they, if sometimes they, know LIKE i. DON'T
i think you can do like a seismic. GRID i
don't like if you go play pond.
Speaker 4: Hockey growing up In, canada you know when it's safe
to go out of the ice and play what is
In SO i guess my question, is you, know does
somebody sneeze hear about this all the?
Speaker 2: Time god damn, It, CHARLIE i told you to take
your fucking allergy. Medicine. Wrong.
Speaker 4: Wrong it's funny BECAUSE i had all, Right adam possible,
candidate LIKE i haven't heard from two days and he
just Said i'm going on a seeing trip In Lake.
Speaker 3: Taho i'm not making that. Up i'm, like, oh NOW
i KNOW i haven't heard from.
Speaker 2: Him, well maybe MAYBE i haven't heard from him because,
uh there was an. Avalanche an avalanche kit contains three
essentials three essential mandatory items for backcountry. Travel so this
is What i'm. Saying if you do hell, skiing they
usually make you have. This an avalanche. Transceiver it's a
beacon to emit and receive, signals a collapsible probe to
pinpoint burial depth so you can say how far down
under the SNOW i. Am and a sturdy metal shovel
to start digging out victims of the avalanche or. Yourself
other critical items include an avalanche air bag. Pack that's
the THING i, said is like a. Parachute it's like
an air. Bag, yeah and it kind. Of and satellite
communication device and first aid. Kit. YEAH i want to
see the avalanche air bag pack BECAUSE i remember hearing
about this AND i know it's saved people in the. Past,
yeah an avalanche it's. Okay an integrated deployable bone bone
system designed to keep the user on the. Surface. Ah
SO i thought it was something that covered you and
then the snow went over to. You but you had
a bubble in there and you breathe in and, right
but you can't because you'll run out of the air down, there.
Right so, yeah balloon systems designed to keep the user
on the surface of an, avalanche along with specialized compartments
for safety. Gear so basically it's like a. Raft it's
like a it's a sled that just keeps you buoyant.
Above holy, shit you, KNOW i would do a lot
of dumb. Things i'm not dumb THAT i like to
do a lot of edgy, things fun. Things i'm not
sure IF i would do that. ONE i don't have
confidence in my skills right to do. THAT i, MEAN
i did a beginner hill all day today with my,
son SO i don't. Think BUT i know a dentist
who is more of an acquaintance of, mind and every
year he goes out in hell skis where they give
on a. Helicopter they drop you, off and you were
skiing the back. Country basically it's not groom, trails and
sometimes you fall off like you can't really tell what's
there because it's covered in two to six feet of.
Snow and so where there's a cliff and it goes
down like what looks like it could be a lot
of great, powder you sink into and there's guys they
die with this. Shit SO i don't know if that's
what these people were, doing that's What I'M i was
trying to find out because that then you kind of, go,
well you're, right, yes you do have to be a
means for. That you have to be a means to
be Skiing Lake, tahoe, Right Skiing Lake tahoe for a
week is probably a couple grand to just ski just
for your path unless a lot of times these resorts
will do things like you're a, member you have a
season pass to a resort on The East, coast and
there also would allow you to use your season pass
to go Ski Park, City, aspen you, know all these other.
Speaker 4: Places to The Colorado, avalanche you have to change their
name for a game to The oh my, god The
colorado on the.
Speaker 2: Morning oh my, GOD i totally forgot about. THAT i
wonder if they will, no, no BUT i wonder if
they're just going to be a push to chase the.
Speaker 3: Day oh we just not mentioned the name of THE tv.
Speaker 2: At crazy the. Tour, Yeah i'm dying to, know because
when you have a tour guide and, stuff this sounds
like outback, skiing and yes it. Does it costs a
lot of. Money, yeah let's, SEE i WISH i. Could,
UH i want to see how much do you think
a trip like this Costs we'll.
Speaker 4: Say about ten thousand dollars a person.
Speaker 2: Ski trip To Lake tao with tour.
Speaker 4: Guides because this sounds like, somebody this sounds, like, okay so.
Speaker 2: This Is i'm. Sorry LAKE tafa offers various options with,
guides ranging from backcountry expeditions with a professional. Guide they
had four. Guides that's exactly WHAT i think they were
doing to free on mountain naturalist. Stores that's not what
we're talking. About so we want the back country.
Speaker 4: Actual retail price of the showcase is is all?
Speaker 2: Right all? Right how much do you? Think so a
week long guided backcountry ski trip To Lake tahoe costs
between you can give me anywhere between the low end
and the high end per. Person i'm gonna say heavily
dependent on group, size, accommodation, luxury and the number of guided.
Days so if they had like a really great house
that they airbat and bead, Plus.
Speaker 4: I'm gonna see between eight and twenty thousand.
Speaker 2: Dollars, no they're saying here fifteen hundred to four grand per.
Person oh, wow, okay, right but then a daily private, Guy.
Speaker 3: Well that's What i'm, Thinking, like if it's by the
day range.
Speaker 2: House, yeah two hundred to six hundred board per person with,
accommodations so fifteen to four thousand for The oh, no
they're saying a guy, That, yeah budget, budget mid high,
end three thousand to forty five, hundred private, cabin daily,
guide rental, gear dining. Out, yeah that's, okay not as
bad AS i. Thought what do you?
Speaker 4: Do but the reason WHY i thought they'd have means
is because they're getting into a helicopter and being.
Speaker 2: Dropped that's. DIFFERENT i think this is. BACKCOUNTRY i think
this may be more like you could be, teleporting not
teleporting what do they call? It when you kind of
it's almost like cross country skis people use on, downhill
but they're not exactly the same, kind and you do
deep knee bends and it's not. Teleble i'm saying the wrong.
Thing my week, ANYWAY i don't, Know, uh you know
what it. Is it's the lies we tell ourselves as.
ADULTS i can still handle.
Speaker 4: THIS i could do.
Speaker 3: This the mind says go and the body says.
Speaker 2: No, WELL i don't know if. THAT i don't know
if that's really the case or. Not BUT i was
thinking about that a lot with things because at some
age we become professional negotiators with, ourselves Like i'll only
have one more and Then i'm gonna go.
Speaker 4: Home, Now, yeah it's in pulp fiction before od's, yes all,
right here's What i'm gonna.
Speaker 3: Do we go in the.
Speaker 2: Bathroom, yeah OR i don't NEED. GPS i know exactly,
WHERE i know. WHAT i don't know What i'm. Doing
i'll Start. Monday i'm gonna Start, monday, man and, uh you,
know or the one last, episode just one last episode
and then we're done for the. Day we're not gonna watch,
anymore going to bed AND i. Go adulthood is just
managing the stories we tell. Ourselves that's really all it.
Is you. Know it's Not malicia's. Lies it's just, yeah it's.
Stories it's, microlies micro. Lies if we all do, THAT
i don't, know it's, funny BUT i think it's also
very identifiable for people BECAUSE I i feel LIKE i
do that all the. Time we all do it to
go siate with. MYSELF i, mean it's almost like self.
Deception that's that's what the Show The sopranos is all.
About How americans lie to themselves on a regular basis
to protect whatever the thought is in their mind that
gives them this feeling of everything's, Okay i'm doing everything.
RIGHT i. Know you know WHAT i. SAY i think.
TOO i think we lie more to ourselves than then
we do other. People, whyeah of course we. Do why, though.
Speaker 4: Because we know, that we know the, limits we know the,
Mistakes we've been able to live through.
Speaker 3: It we've gotten used to.
Speaker 4: Ourselves, yeah that's, why like people Like, tony Like i'm twenty. Seven,
YEAH i know, right that's a big, one, right all,
right big, lie we tell.
Speaker 2: Ourselves, yeah how about trying to put something together without? Instructions? Yeah,
NOTHING i don't need. That humbles guy faster than, that
either that or the magic, carver, RIGHT i can't do it.
Anyway SO i don't know what happened to these poor
people out, there BUT i SAW i showed that To
jamison because WHEN i was telling him about the guy
who hell has, skied he, goes did you ever do
that with? HIM i, go, No, No i'm not confident
enough of my. Ability you gotta know your you gotta
know your. Limits tell, you, yeah do you?
Speaker 4: Ski i've never skied in my, life never in your,
life never skied, ever play.
Speaker 2: Golf would you? Try?
Speaker 4: YEAH i would try?
Speaker 2: Skiing you? Would? Yeah oh, god that would be so.
FUN i want, video of course you. Do i'm.
Speaker 4: Clumsy that's why we used admit it to be. That
like you were the one encouraging me about a life coaching,
business D, ANY i think you should have.
Speaker 2: Gone a million.
Speaker 4: DOLLARS i. Did then you text, Me Tommy. Brow you
see that sign the other, day you think it Was danny's. Client,
bro this is gonna be an unmitigated fing, disaster kind
of like something.
Speaker 3: ELSE i, know.
Speaker 4: It's. OKAY i mean because we made fun of everybody
on that. Show, yes you can't make fun of yourself
that you don't deserve to laugh at anybody.
Speaker 2: Else exactly, EXACTLY i. DON'T i would have been doing
the same.
Speaker 7: Thing, yeah a life Coach Phil Billy's.
Speaker 4: No, no, No i'm saying like that's if the roles were, yes,
yes the shoes are on different, feet, right, yeah you know,
yeah tongue.
Speaker 2: Shown. Brow he didn't say, That he never. Did he
never said, NO i, KNOW i don't want to give the.
Speaker 3: Funny, No i'm Just i'm just having, fun all. Right, well,
No tommy's.
Speaker 2: Great it hurts, sometimes, RIGHT i, MEAN I i think
that there's something that. There there is something, There and
SOMEDAY i want to do a podcast adults with hurt
feelings and how you try to hide it and you
try to act like everything's. Okay you're talking about, right happen.
Speaker 3: To me on the show so many.
Speaker 4: Times, Right, Yeah i'm not.
Speaker 2: Gonna brown a tired red. BROW i will tell you
that as you get a little bit, Older LIKE i
had a friend of mine say something to me about
another friend and it was basically like AND i said
to the, PERSON i, go that. Hurts, MAN i get.
It i've been. There it. Hurts and they're, like, yeah
AND i don't know what that. Is maybe it's this
stupid therapy. Thing And i'm not let me afhrase. That
maybe it's the therapy Thing i'm. Trying but it wasn't
THAT i totally got it and someone was just being
honest with me in a, moment AND i was, like,
yeah but it is weird because, sometimes like even with,
kids LIKE i love busting, balls somebody takes it too,
far or If i've taken it too far in the,
PASS i felt. Horrible i'd never wanted to really hurt people's.
Feelings but when you're an, adult you know WHAT i,
MEAN i, think like do we think that your feelings
just go? Away Like i'm, Serious like IF i rip on,
somebody AND i have done numbers on people as an
adult in a, bar just fucking right to their, face
JUST i, mean and everybody's, laughing and that poor person
just kind of takes, it and, then you, know kind
of moves on and walks. Away and now That i'm thinking,
ABOUT i, go what's still? Shitty because we're adults and
WE i Think i'm just playing, right But i'm coming.
Hard i'm coming, hard you know? What before we, GO,
ei there's two THINGS i gotta tell.
Speaker 4: You, Okay so last night.
Speaker 2: In one of my groups and they're breaking down the group,
afterward and there was a topic and, all AND i
don't want to say too too, much BUT i said
something like sometimes you, KNOW i did like a dad, voice, like,
OH i, said how confusing it can be for kids
because a lot of times we'll say to a, kid
if you're not feeling great about you, know if you're
not if you're, uncomfortable if you're, sad if you're, frustrated walk,
away if you're frustrated or you feel stuff getting, angry walk,
away give yourself some time to cool. Down so the
kid does something they're they're, frustrated and the parent comes
in and, goes come, HERE i want you To i'm
about to talk to. You and the kid starts walking
away because they know they should walk, away and you,
go where are you? Going get back? Here? Right and
it's like this confusing thing for a. Kid AND i
always thought that as a, kid like you told ME
i could walk away When i'm. Frustrated now WHEN i
go to walk away When i'm, frustrated you're yelling at
me for walking, away like, right, okay confusing. Message so
In i'm saying this and i raise my, voice But
i'm looking. Down i'm looking down at the ground AND
i go sometimes you, go you, know with a, kid
it can be. Confused, hey get back over. Here AND
i look up and at the danny like everybody's like.
Speaker 7: WHOA i was, like, okay, yep now THAT i have your. Attention,
no but they're like visibly like people were, like oh my.
Speaker 2: God AND i didn't even realize. It And i'm like
that would be my dad, voice And i'm like, wow
MAYBE i was, really like really too much of a,
Dick but that was my own, man and that's WHAT
i came. FROM i DIDN'T i don't.
Speaker 3: Know, yeah my, father like we for years we thought
it was, yelly he was just talking.
Speaker 2: Yeah and then it's just how he. Was have you
ever been part of a privilege? WALK i don't know
what that, Is, Okay so everybody lines up like against the,
wall and they ask questions and sometimes for the response
to the question to take a step, forward or you
take a step, backwards or you stay where you. Are
so it was a privilege, walk, Right and it was
really to just show AND i know that that we
put a label in front of. Privilege some people, do,
right and they, do but privilege just in terms of,
privilege and it is questions and you can't like choose.
It but there was a bowl of candy at the,
end like who's going to get there? First AND i
knew who was getting there. First ye, YEAH i don't know.
WHY i just, go it's gonna fucking be me Because
i'm a fifty four year old white guy AND i
didn't come from, nothing, Right so, question take a step?
Forward if one or both of your parents were college.
Educated step, forward and then it was take a step
backward if you ever found yourself, unsheltered like you, know
or on what do they call on? Home NOW i don't.
Think well they said, homeless BUT i think the TERM
i don't, know AND i have a whole, problem, yes
so but, whatever right and AND i but Now I'm
i'm towards the, front So i'm not looking back to
see what's going on back? There right just and then
it was like things like take a step forward if
you had more than ten books in your house growing,
up not necessarily books you put. There you, Know i'm,
saying like, books SO i writ or take a step
backward if you ever felt like you were being watched
closely or followed while. Shopping, right and, OKAY i don't.
MOVE i THINK i moved. Back on like if a
family member was ever addicted to drugs or alcohol we
had rehab, things, Okay and then take a step backward
if anybody ever saw you as a. Threat and SO
i did take a step. Backwards now it was not accurate.
EXACTLY i was out of college working AT i was
at radio station part, time AND i was djaying at
the at bar on they'll call The. Windfield And i'm
leaving The windfield one night AND i have MY cd
booklet in the front seat of my car BECAUSE i
was DJing from their LITTLE dj booth and And i'm
getting on The expressway AND i get pulled over and a,
frustrated frustrated officer comes up and, says you got to
get out of the car and come with. Me And i'm, like,
WHAT i, Go i'm not getting out of the. Car
you got to get out of the car and come with.
Me there are some girls back at and they were
in front of a grocery store that claims you've been
harassing them tonight and we're bringing you back. There AND i,
go what IF i don't, go, well Then i'll arrest.
YOU i, go, okay what DO i do with my?
Car lock? It i'm supposed to leave it on the
side of this on. Ramp he, goes, YEP i, go
what about my CDs and ALL i because to, ME
i had spent a ton of money on these, things
right leave them right. There so NOW i get in
the back of the cop. Car it's those hard plastic
toughs that and they start driving back and it comes
across the right To the girls are scared and they
just want to go, home so they're ready to just call.
It SO i had not been anywhere near young. Girls
it wasn't anywhere near THEM i. Fit but the guys
like you fit the description your. CAR i, GO i
was at this. PLACE i, go we can go back.
THERE i just left. THERE i didn't talk to, anybody
was in A dj. Booth that's not what they. Said
and then he says to, me it's your lucky, night
and he turns around and drops me off of my.
Car SO i took a step, backward thinking someone saw
me as a, threat but they never. Did it wasn't.
ME i never did any so MAYBE i shouldn't have
taken a step back. There and then it was like
if someone in your, household a parent or someone in
charge in your, household had a job that required an advanced,
degree so beyond. College SO i took a step forward
AND i got the. CANDY i was already. There but,
yeah and it is amazing that you. Know and WHAT
i thought was great was that no matter where you
were in this spectrum of people in terms of a
privilege or, not just having opportunities that are available you're
all here, now so let's. Go, yeah, right let's. Go
that was kind of the WAY i took. It BUT
i think some people did not like this whatever BECAUSE
i think they had. TO i think somebody might have
asked a question of something later, on and there was
some scratched. Heads BUT i don't.
Speaker 4: Know it's all, right get a chance look up the
episode Of i've always seen the clip of it Of
beavis and Butt head being taught white.
Speaker 3: Privilege and you will crack.
Speaker 2: Up well, YEAH i mean what you?
Speaker 4: Will you will literally like Crack they take it literally.
Speaker 2: LITERALLY i have always believed AND i say this a,
lot And i've said it for, years and you actually.
Lived this was a lived experience for. YOU i have
always felt LIKE i could fit in ANYWHERE i wanted to.
Anywhere if it was a, big fancy country, CLUB i
could fit. In remember when we went up and kissed
them want to make a? Trophy? Yes and then we
walked into the party AND i said to, you just that. Cool.
Cool and we were there for.
Speaker 4: A, while about forty five, minutes drinking for, free, yep,
eating hanging, out, yeah taking pictures with the. Trophy, me
you And Peter, montemorno and.
Speaker 2: Nobody fucking said anything for a while until somebody had
a guest list and they're, GOING i don't see these
guys on.
Speaker 4: There, yeah we didn't get.
Speaker 2: It they didn't even like there was nothing like we
fit right, in you know What i'm. Saying, Yeah AND
i have always been that. WAY i was In Park.
CITY i would go to these high end fundraisers as
my aunt's date to a deer valley for these, things,
right deer valleys like, this, big, fancy, LOVELY i mean
food like you wouldn't believe women, that just like you
wouldn't BELIEVE i fit. RIGHT i was right, there, MAN
i Had i'm talking to some women From sweden and
it was, awesome AND i could hang out With race And.
RANDY i go down To Watkins glen and do. That
i've never felt LIKE i didn't. Anywhere that has been
my entire, life And i've always known that that was
kind of a form of. PRIVILEGE i really. Did and
when it really became apparent to me was something my
father said to me BECAUSE i got on the radio In,
Poughkeepsie New. YORK i HAD i was facing four hundred
dollars fines in traffic, whatever AND i if the officer
doesn't show up at, court it gets. Dismissed he didn't show,
Up SO i got on the radio AND i thanked
him for saving me four hundred and fifty. Dollars AND
i got pulled over almost every single day for SHIT
i didn't even. Know you get pulled over for. Ever
you open your mouth every. Time every TIME i, LEFT
i GOT i thought they made something, up like ONCE
i go is that even a? Thing he, Goes it is.
Now i'll never forget. It it is. NOW i WISH
i could remember what it.
Speaker 3: Was my father got pulled over once he, GOES i wasn't?
Speedy was this for all the times you?
Speaker 2: Were, yeah that's not. Fair you got to catch me for, real,
man right? Right SO i got so, many and my
father said to, me he, goes it makes me very
thankful that you are not a young black, man BECAUSE
i would be so worried with a number of times
and opening your mouth and challenging authority and. Whatever i'm
not saying that anything would have. Happened maybe you wouldn't.
HAVE i don't. Know i'm, THIS i can't be anything.
Else and, so But i've always known THAT i could
just walk in anywhere and NEVER i was never followed
in a. Store it or whatever looked at me LIKE
i was gonna just Go. Robin it WAS i was,
like hey know What i'm. Saying and so it was
just very. Different And i've been aware of, that and
so when people have said white, Privilege i've always known
what it. Meant it didn't mean you didn't work hard
to get where you. Are it didn't mean that at.
All it just meant you probably had a better network
than most people because you're, white you, know and maybe
not not. Everybody. LOOK i know a guy Named Brother
weiz who was coming. BACK i THINK i told this
once before. Recently i'm there coming back From, canada had
his boat up, there left his wife and kids on.
There he And joe t are gonna drive back with
these giant pillows that were taking up all this, space
like decorative pillows that were on the. Boat someone flew.
Off he's like, Literally so they're bringing them back and
they get to customs and these are two white guys
all tattooed, up and they get pulled over and they're
ripping the pillows with knives and shit to see if
there's cocaine in.
Speaker 4: There there's no. Drugs there was nothing in the pillows.
Speaker 2: Exactly So i'm SAYING i never had that profile IF
i came through with. Pillows i'm gonna tell you ninety percent.
Sure it's just, like where are you going with the?
Pillows that's my wife's and bitching at. ME i gotta
get them off the. Boat i'm bringing them back To. Rochester,
okay THAT'S i don't. Know that's What i'm talking. About
is that? Privilege probably BECAUSE i didn't have the pillows
ripped apart AND i didn't HAVE i didn't HAVE i wasn't,
detained that wasn't slow, Down so, WHATEVER i don't. Know
here's The Warren zevon song THAT i always. Loved it
was the last one he was talking. About we'll close
it out on This keep you in your heart for a.
While i'm sometimes trying to put together my funeral, playlist
AND i think i'd have to keep this one in.
Speaker 4: There if it doesn't mean of you.
Speaker 2: Any yes he did in your heart for a, While
yes he. Did when you.
Speaker 4: Get up in the morning.
Speaker 1: And you see that crazy, sun keep being in your
heart for a.
Speaker 2: While what if you're a loved one said this to.
YOU i would cry every DAY i heard. This oh,
yeah you know WHAT i. Mean all right in your
heart for a, while all right For DAN, burrello For
Jamison moran and The. RESILIENCE i was very very happy
back skeating in the rain and it was. Awesome Bill,
moran we'll see you next.
Speaker 4: Time, shine.
Speaker 2: Keep in your heart for a. While