WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.560 --> 00:00:02.120 Thank you so much for being here with us. 2 00:00:02.160 --> 00:00:04.200 I appreciate you taking the time out of your busy 3 00:00:04.200 --> 00:00:06.040 schedule and coming and gracing. 4 00:00:05.679 --> 00:00:09.039 Our couch with your presence. 5 00:00:09.080 --> 00:00:11.279 I feel like I got the chance to watch her 6 00:00:11.279 --> 00:00:14.480 documentary this week and I fell in love with it. 7 00:00:14.599 --> 00:00:17.239 You fell in love with your story French. She introduced me, guys, 8 00:00:17.239 --> 00:00:20.120 to your whole story, and I was very moved by 9 00:00:20.320 --> 00:00:21.120 the whole documentary. 10 00:00:21.120 --> 00:00:22.440 It was very beautifully laid out. 11 00:00:22.920 --> 00:00:26.280 I feel like you're a very courageous, inspiring woman to 12 00:00:26.600 --> 00:00:29.519 have dealt with everything that you've dealt with and still 13 00:00:29.559 --> 00:00:32.079 come on top and in such a beautiful way. So 14 00:00:32.240 --> 00:00:34.159 I want you to come here and talk about that 15 00:00:34.200 --> 00:00:36.200 a little bit. Tell us a story, tell us how 16 00:00:36.520 --> 00:00:38.320 the whole documentary kind of came about. 17 00:00:38.359 --> 00:00:39.920 Of like being into fruition. 18 00:00:40.600 --> 00:00:43.240 Well, I think that one of the things that happened 19 00:00:43.280 --> 00:00:46.920 for Neolexus was that when Rob and I married, we 20 00:00:46.960 --> 00:00:50.240 had been high school sweethearts since I was sixteen, and 21 00:00:50.320 --> 00:00:53.119 so when he finally settled hisself down and asked me 22 00:00:53.200 --> 00:00:56.320 to marry him, we had three children between us, and 23 00:00:56.359 --> 00:00:58.840 it was the happiest moment of my life. And so 24 00:00:58.920 --> 00:01:01.000 I pulled out this care or because I wanted to 25 00:01:01.079 --> 00:01:03.439 document it all. I'm like, I have just done the 26 00:01:03.479 --> 00:01:05.120 best thing ever in my life. 27 00:01:05.400 --> 00:01:08.719 It just started mainly of just like doing family videos, 28 00:01:08.799 --> 00:01:10.959 kind of like documenting like the whole process of it, 29 00:01:11.000 --> 00:01:13.439 and then kind of just rolled into something even more 30 00:01:13.519 --> 00:01:14.840 beautiful for the world to see. 31 00:01:14.879 --> 00:01:16.920 Just because we had made something beautiful together. 32 00:01:17.040 --> 00:01:21.599 And so about six months after that, we found ourselves 33 00:01:21.599 --> 00:01:25.760 in a financial crisis as a family and in Louisiana's 34 00:01:25.799 --> 00:01:28.319 criminal justice system, which is the worst in the world. 35 00:01:28.959 --> 00:01:33.519 Louisiana leads the entire world in incarceration. And at that 36 00:01:33.719 --> 00:01:37.480 point the filming continued because I just was in awe 37 00:01:37.799 --> 00:01:40.280 that our lives that were so beautiful just six months 38 00:01:40.319 --> 00:01:47.840 prior had ended up in such a desperate, really intermultuous experience, 39 00:01:47.959 --> 00:01:50.680 and so I had to keep recording, you know, I 40 00:01:50.719 --> 00:01:54.319 had to keep documenting. And so probably about maybe ten 41 00:01:54.400 --> 00:01:58.239 years into our sentence, Rob ended up going to prison 42 00:01:58.359 --> 00:02:01.840 and getting getting sentenced to sixty one years. So probably 43 00:02:01.879 --> 00:02:04.799 about ten years into his sentence, after I had come 44 00:02:04.840 --> 00:02:07.159 home from prison, it was still imperative for me to 45 00:02:07.239 --> 00:02:10.960 keep recording because at this point I'm thinking, certainly maybe 46 00:02:11.000 --> 00:02:13.719 we needed to be not even maybe we needed to 47 00:02:13.759 --> 00:02:18.520 be our behavior needed to be rectified, but a life 48 00:02:18.560 --> 00:02:22.560 sentence for us when we took five thousand dollars, I 49 00:02:22.599 --> 00:02:25.879 felt was extremely harsh and abrasive and a. 50 00:02:25.879 --> 00:02:27.479 Misuse of justice for sure. 51 00:02:28.159 --> 00:02:30.159 And so we continued to film at that point because 52 00:02:30.159 --> 00:02:31.840 we were hopeful to use it as a tool to 53 00:02:31.840 --> 00:02:35.080 get vibe about well with the work of our family. 54 00:02:35.120 --> 00:02:37.639 Over twenty one years, we were finally able to bring 55 00:02:37.719 --> 00:02:41.159 him home, and so then the documentary took another life 56 00:02:41.199 --> 00:02:43.719 of its own to be able to share with people that, 57 00:02:44.599 --> 00:02:46.639 you know, a story of love and hope and no 58 00:02:46.719 --> 00:02:49.960 matter what situation you find yourself in, when you sit 59 00:02:50.039 --> 00:02:52.680 together as a family, love never fails and you can 60 00:02:52.719 --> 00:02:53.120 make it. 61 00:02:53.360 --> 00:02:55.439 That's beautiful. I feel like, you know, it's definitely a 62 00:02:55.479 --> 00:02:57.719 true love story. You guys, you know went through a 63 00:02:57.759 --> 00:02:59.840 lot of you know, trials and tribulations, and you know, 64 00:03:00.039 --> 00:03:02.879 being from so young at age at sixteen, not really knowing, 65 00:03:03.000 --> 00:03:05.240 like I mean at that point, like what really love 66 00:03:05.360 --> 00:03:07.960 is or what that could even inspire to be into 67 00:03:07.960 --> 00:03:12.080 certain things, and then going through such to traumatic situations, 68 00:03:12.120 --> 00:03:13.960 It's like, how did you keep that love alive? 69 00:03:15.599 --> 00:03:15.759 Now? 70 00:03:15.800 --> 00:03:18.039 That is a good question. I like him, he all right, 71 00:03:18.159 --> 00:03:21.240 you know. You know, I think about our filmmaker Gear Bradley. 72 00:03:21.319 --> 00:03:23.800 She's got me croning at the beginning of the movie, like, Oh, 73 00:03:23.919 --> 00:03:25.560 I just love me some whobbery. 74 00:03:25.560 --> 00:03:27.240 It can definitely tell, Like in the you know, the 75 00:03:27.280 --> 00:03:29.240 whole movie, I was like, you could tell like from 76 00:03:29.240 --> 00:03:29.879 you as a woman. 77 00:03:29.919 --> 00:03:31.960 You know, I've been in love. I've had my own situations. 78 00:03:32.000 --> 00:03:34.120 You know, I'm divorced, but you know, definitely you feel 79 00:03:34.120 --> 00:03:36.759 that loving times. But it's like you can tell from 80 00:03:36.840 --> 00:03:39.000 your facial you know, just her facial expressions, like just 81 00:03:39.039 --> 00:03:41.599 your you. You just exude that you were in love 82 00:03:41.639 --> 00:03:43.400 with him and that was like really meant to be 83 00:03:43.520 --> 00:03:45.560 in a sense and not even knowing you really in 84 00:03:45.599 --> 00:03:47.680 the beginning of the whole you know documentary, it was 85 00:03:47.759 --> 00:03:50.120 just like more portrayed on you and your path of 86 00:03:50.159 --> 00:03:51.800 what it went down to, your story. 87 00:03:52.240 --> 00:03:54.599 Mm hmmm. So what do you think, what did it make? 88 00:03:54.680 --> 00:03:54.879 What? 89 00:03:54.960 --> 00:03:57.360 How do you keep it working? You know, doing that time, Rob, 90 00:03:57.800 --> 00:03:58.280 I think. 91 00:03:58.080 --> 00:04:02.159 You just keep doing the next right thing. It starts 92 00:04:02.159 --> 00:04:05.319 with a feeling, you know, as far as love is concerned. 93 00:04:05.319 --> 00:04:08.400 And the minute that I met Fox, she may mention 94 00:04:08.439 --> 00:04:11.879 we're high school sweethearts. From the very first moment that 95 00:04:11.919 --> 00:04:13.680 I laid eyes on her, there was like this little 96 00:04:13.680 --> 00:04:15.639 thing that happens on the inside, and people that have 97 00:04:15.759 --> 00:04:18.160 been in love before they know that. 98 00:04:18.120 --> 00:04:23.720 Feeling butterflies right right, that makes makes like, oh okay, 99 00:04:24.160 --> 00:04:25.759 nobody else may before. 100 00:04:25.920 --> 00:04:30.399 That's right, So you know that thing, and I continue 101 00:04:30.399 --> 00:04:32.720 to feel it over and over and over again with Fox. 102 00:04:32.759 --> 00:04:34.800 And then it became, you know, at that point to 103 00:04:34.879 --> 00:04:37.839 where I like seeing her smile, so I wanted to 104 00:04:37.879 --> 00:04:39.959 do things continuously that make her smile. 105 00:04:40.480 --> 00:04:42.600 Uh, definitely has a beautiful smile, right. 106 00:04:42.839 --> 00:04:44.480 You know, I like the way she lasts or you know, 107 00:04:44.480 --> 00:04:46.920 I always wanted to, you know, provide comic relief in 108 00:04:46.959 --> 00:04:51.000 our relationship. So it became things about it became very intentional. 109 00:04:51.399 --> 00:04:53.399 You know, when you find somebody that you love and 110 00:04:53.439 --> 00:04:55.120 you want to spend time with them, you know, you 111 00:04:55.240 --> 00:04:56.839 do things to kind of show that you know, you 112 00:04:56.959 --> 00:04:59.240 want to be with them. And I think I just 113 00:04:59.319 --> 00:05:01.199 kept doing that, and she kept doing it back, and 114 00:05:01.240 --> 00:05:03.000 the more she did it back, I would do it. 115 00:05:02.920 --> 00:05:03.480 Back to her. 116 00:05:04.560 --> 00:05:08.160 You know, my son Justice probably says it best about love. 117 00:05:08.199 --> 00:05:10.000 When he was a kid, we were a visit with 118 00:05:10.079 --> 00:05:13.560 his father at Angola Prison and he had. His name 119 00:05:13.639 --> 00:05:16.639 is Justue. He liked started liking this girl in his 120 00:05:16.800 --> 00:05:19.360 in his class and second grade. Her name was Justice, 121 00:05:19.959 --> 00:05:22.879 and uh, and he says, I'm in love. And we said, well, 122 00:05:22.879 --> 00:05:25.319 how do you know you're in love Justice? And he says, 123 00:05:25.560 --> 00:05:29.439 because I chase her and she chased me. I kiss 124 00:05:29.519 --> 00:05:30.920 her and she kissed me. 125 00:05:31.160 --> 00:05:33.240 It's like, okay, that's pretty simple, all right. 126 00:05:33.839 --> 00:05:36.000 I like it. Sometimes it can be just as that simple. 127 00:05:36.120 --> 00:05:38.600 Yes, But so did you feel like you kind of 128 00:05:38.600 --> 00:05:40.920 continuously kind of date each other within, you know, your 129 00:05:40.920 --> 00:05:42.959 prison sentence, because how do you keep such you know, 130 00:05:43.000 --> 00:05:45.319 a beautiful woman who's fighting for you on the outside, Like, 131 00:05:45.360 --> 00:05:48.720 how do you keep her into your loving relationship? 132 00:05:49.000 --> 00:05:52.759 Well, strangely enough, Fox and I grew started our relationship. 133 00:05:52.800 --> 00:05:54.879 I was in the military home on leave when I 134 00:05:54.920 --> 00:05:58.240 met Fox. So even from the onset of our relationship, 135 00:05:58.279 --> 00:06:01.279 we had a distant relationship because I stationed in Europe 136 00:06:01.360 --> 00:06:04.279 and she was a seventeen year old girl here in 137 00:06:04.360 --> 00:06:07.480 high school. And with that being said, there was a 138 00:06:07.480 --> 00:06:09.680 lot of phone calls. I only came home maybe twice 139 00:06:09.720 --> 00:06:12.439 a year on leave, and at that time it would 140 00:06:12.439 --> 00:06:15.519 maybe be for two weeks to maybe thirty days Max 141 00:06:15.920 --> 00:06:16.800 that I would be at home. 142 00:06:16.879 --> 00:06:18.360 So you feel like that prepared you a little bit 143 00:06:18.399 --> 00:06:18.920 to kind. 144 00:06:18.759 --> 00:06:20.879 Of fortunate unfortunately. 145 00:06:20.920 --> 00:06:24.639 But to make it thirty four years we've been together, right, 146 00:06:24.680 --> 00:06:27.519 we've been married In April, it'll be twenty four years, 147 00:06:28.279 --> 00:06:31.800 and we have lived together as husband and wife for 148 00:06:31.839 --> 00:06:36.399 a whole two years out of that thirty four year rags. 149 00:06:36.319 --> 00:06:37.839 And how is that working for you? 150 00:06:37.879 --> 00:06:40.600 Well, he's still smiling and I am too, so you know, 151 00:06:41.079 --> 00:06:43.399 you might keep around a little longer, Like, so this 152 00:06:43.439 --> 00:06:44.279 shit is working. 153 00:06:45.399 --> 00:06:47.560 Was it a big adjustment period when you got out 154 00:06:47.600 --> 00:06:50.120 to like now you go? You had your relationship you 155 00:06:50.199 --> 00:06:52.079 know behind, you know, in prison and you being out 156 00:06:52.360 --> 00:06:54.639 is was it difficult to kind of transition in back 157 00:06:54.639 --> 00:06:56.399 into a relationship in the outside world. 158 00:06:58.160 --> 00:07:01.160 I think we both have two different up. 159 00:07:01.160 --> 00:07:03.959 I think for me it was probably, you know, just everything, 160 00:07:04.000 --> 00:07:05.839 you know, when he rob came home, we had lost 161 00:07:05.839 --> 00:07:07.720 our business. I had held on as long as I 162 00:07:07.759 --> 00:07:10.480 could to the family business, and before he came home 163 00:07:10.519 --> 00:07:14.360 it folded. So when he came home, we were broke, broken, shit, 164 00:07:14.720 --> 00:07:17.560 and and so just trying to get I think the 165 00:07:17.560 --> 00:07:21.079 first year was just trying to get our feet up. 166 00:07:21.160 --> 00:07:23.560 Unto us and figuring out how is it that we're 167 00:07:23.600 --> 00:07:26.120 going to be able to move in life now together. 168 00:07:26.480 --> 00:07:28.360 And then the second year, I think, after you kind 169 00:07:28.399 --> 00:07:31.800 of get that situated and realize okay, yeah, you're really home, 170 00:07:32.360 --> 00:07:34.120 then the next phase of it for us was our 171 00:07:34.160 --> 00:07:37.319 sexual liberation. We had worked for twenty one years to 172 00:07:37.399 --> 00:07:39.839 oppress our sex drive and that's a hell of a 173 00:07:40.000 --> 00:07:46.600 manipulative and dogmatic and mind bending thing to do. And 174 00:07:46.639 --> 00:07:50.279 so just trying to reacclimate ourselves to what it means 175 00:07:50.319 --> 00:07:53.480 to even be human, you know, to touch, to feel, 176 00:07:53.639 --> 00:07:56.759 and know that you really can do so freely. So 177 00:07:56.759 --> 00:07:59.480 it's like a whole reprogramming thing that he and I 178 00:07:59.519 --> 00:08:00.800 have been going through. 179 00:08:00.920 --> 00:08:03.319 Yeah, because even in our prison experience, I don't know 180 00:08:03.319 --> 00:08:04.879 if a lot of people know this, but you're only 181 00:08:05.040 --> 00:08:08.680 entitled to two kisses when your family, you know, So 182 00:08:08.720 --> 00:08:10.759 you get a kiss when of your family members first arrive, 183 00:08:10.839 --> 00:08:12.720 and then you get a kiss at the end. So 184 00:08:13.560 --> 00:08:15.240 it was a thing that we have as a family 185 00:08:15.279 --> 00:08:17.439 among us that when you look at the billboard for 186 00:08:17.480 --> 00:08:20.480 the for the film, it's a picture of us. 187 00:08:20.399 --> 00:08:21.240 Kissing one another. 188 00:08:21.360 --> 00:08:24.160 So we laugh oftentimes about the fact that here we 189 00:08:24.160 --> 00:08:27.279 were for the last two decades only being allowed to 190 00:08:27.360 --> 00:08:29.519 kiss each other twice a day, and now we're depicted 191 00:08:29.560 --> 00:08:31.240 kissing all over the world, right. 192 00:08:31.199 --> 00:08:34.080 I said, we've been stealing kisses in visitation and now. 193 00:08:34.320 --> 00:08:34.919 To make up for. 194 00:08:36.679 --> 00:08:36.759 Us. 195 00:08:37.480 --> 00:08:38.320 I can't blame not. 196 00:08:38.960 --> 00:08:41.279 So do you feel like it was almost kind of 197 00:08:41.840 --> 00:08:44.759 like the first time again when you got to actually 198 00:08:44.799 --> 00:08:47.360 finally get into, you know, be with each other intimately 199 00:08:47.360 --> 00:08:49.039 again had that. 200 00:08:49.120 --> 00:08:51.120 Same little quirky kind of feeling that you feel when 201 00:08:51.159 --> 00:08:53.919 you don't really know your way around this person's you know, 202 00:08:54.000 --> 00:08:54.840 workings or whatever. 203 00:08:54.879 --> 00:08:56.320 And it takes a little time. 204 00:08:56.120 --> 00:08:58.120 But we're warming up right. 205 00:08:59.639 --> 00:09:00.559 At a time. 206 00:09:00.840 --> 00:09:04.120 Yes, yes, yes, And I think the further way that 207 00:09:04.159 --> 00:09:07.120 we move from just even the hardships we are even 208 00:09:07.200 --> 00:09:09.639 now beginning with the release of the film, was the 209 00:09:09.639 --> 00:09:11.759 first time we realized, Alex is that we have been 210 00:09:11.840 --> 00:09:15.240 even unpacked all of the pain and the tumal that 211 00:09:15.240 --> 00:09:19.360 we that the separation trauma caused us. And so just 212 00:09:19.440 --> 00:09:22.720 even going through the interviews after they ended, we were like, whoa, 213 00:09:23.440 --> 00:09:25.159 you know, I've never even thought about any of this 214 00:09:25.200 --> 00:09:26.320 stuff they're asking us. 215 00:09:26.320 --> 00:09:28.440 So I'm sure it's like you said, it's very different 216 00:09:28.480 --> 00:09:30.200 for both sides. You know what I mean it's like 217 00:09:30.440 --> 00:09:33.559 it's you forget often because we're human, like what we 218 00:09:33.679 --> 00:09:35.519 do suppress so much because you just deal with it 219 00:09:35.559 --> 00:09:37.240 because we have to live. We have to keep going one, 220 00:09:37.360 --> 00:09:38.519 you know, food and foot in front of the other 221 00:09:38.559 --> 00:09:40.200 and kind of just we have no other choice but 222 00:09:40.320 --> 00:09:42.759 to succeed that way. But you also don't realize how 223 00:09:42.799 --> 00:09:45.639 much intimate or like personal things that you kind of 224 00:09:45.679 --> 00:09:47.639 like have to heal. That's why I say like that, 225 00:09:47.720 --> 00:09:49.759 you know, dating each other and being intimate with each 226 00:09:49.799 --> 00:09:52.080 other or doing all those sweet things that you know, 227 00:09:52.360 --> 00:09:54.399 continue a relationship for as long as you guys have 228 00:09:54.440 --> 00:09:56.240 been together, we've. 229 00:09:56.039 --> 00:09:56.799 Been so twisted. 230 00:09:56.799 --> 00:09:58.440 We used to go back and look at Google and 231 00:09:58.480 --> 00:10:02.279 google how many times people are have sex with trying 232 00:10:02.320 --> 00:10:04.159 to figure out, like, we're doing it too much and 233 00:10:04.200 --> 00:10:05.200 we're not doing it enough. 234 00:10:05.279 --> 00:10:06.080 So what's the number? 235 00:10:06.720 --> 00:10:09.519 Oh that that really put things in a perspective, right 236 00:10:09.600 --> 00:10:11.639 because I'm like, I don't think we're doing it enough. 237 00:10:11.679 --> 00:10:12.600 I think we should be. 238 00:10:14.240 --> 00:10:15.120 You're like, and. 239 00:10:16.879 --> 00:10:19.679 He got it frustrated and he googles it. You know, 240 00:10:19.679 --> 00:10:22.720 he's like the Google wizard. I never think about friend 241 00:10:23.679 --> 00:10:26.840 is his friend and so he looks at says he 242 00:10:26.919 --> 00:10:29.679 puts it on his reading glasses and he says, do 243 00:10:29.759 --> 00:10:32.000 you know that people in Japan have sex? 244 00:10:32.240 --> 00:10:32.759 What was it? 245 00:10:32.759 --> 00:10:33.519 Three year? 246 00:10:33.679 --> 00:10:34.720 Three times a year? 247 00:10:34.879 --> 00:10:36.440 I could not be in Japan. 248 00:10:40.240 --> 00:10:44.440 Moving, But even in our country, you don't actually realize 249 00:10:44.440 --> 00:10:48.399 how little people are actually sexually engaged in there, you know, 250 00:10:48.480 --> 00:10:51.200 in a relationship to one another. So when we start 251 00:10:51.240 --> 00:10:53.200 looking at the numbers and start saying, well, okay, ship, 252 00:10:53.200 --> 00:10:54.000 I think we're doing. 253 00:10:53.840 --> 00:10:55.840 Pretty good, so what is your number? 254 00:10:56.679 --> 00:10:58.080 It varies from one week to the next. 255 00:10:58.080 --> 00:10:59.600 You know, it's like having a good game one day, 256 00:10:59.639 --> 00:11:01.559 you all and other days the jumper is just. 257 00:11:01.559 --> 00:11:05.279 Hitting no other ways. You just find ways to make 258 00:11:05.360 --> 00:11:06.159 up to go in that game. 259 00:11:06.960 --> 00:11:10.639 I think we've had experiences where we have had seven 260 00:11:10.879 --> 00:11:14.919 within a twenty four hour time, remember, and that was beautiful. 261 00:11:15.039 --> 00:11:16.960 And then we have had where we may go a 262 00:11:17.000 --> 00:11:18.720 week and be like, oh wait a minute, hold. 263 00:11:18.600 --> 00:11:22.120 Up right, hey, you I got access to you. 264 00:11:22.120 --> 00:11:28.320 So here's the one inimating at the most me, that's 265 00:11:28.360 --> 00:11:29.559 the honest question me. 266 00:11:30.039 --> 00:11:31.440 And to a point where you know, I have to 267 00:11:31.480 --> 00:11:34.159 sometimes just wait on him to get his little feelers together, 268 00:11:34.360 --> 00:11:37.440 like well then' like are you coming over? You're not 269 00:11:37.519 --> 00:11:41.480 coming over? But nonetheless, it is whenever he decides to 270 00:11:41.519 --> 00:11:41.840 come by. 271 00:11:42.000 --> 00:11:43.440 It's pretty nice. 272 00:11:44.240 --> 00:11:46.480 So how did you find your strength with having you know, 273 00:11:46.600 --> 00:11:49.240 him gone for twenty one years, with not being a 274 00:11:49.320 --> 00:11:51.679 sexual being? If you're you know, you obviously seem like 275 00:11:51.720 --> 00:11:54.519 you are sexual being. You watched my movies before you 276 00:11:54.600 --> 00:11:54.919 came here. 277 00:11:54.919 --> 00:11:58.840 Thank you very much, No, thank you, you're welcome. 278 00:11:59.360 --> 00:12:01.840 I'm just here time. 279 00:12:03.320 --> 00:12:05.120 So how did you find that strang to like really 280 00:12:05.200 --> 00:12:08.080 kind of you know, do the work and stay committed 281 00:12:08.080 --> 00:12:10.840 into your relationship and you know, not have sex. 282 00:12:11.679 --> 00:12:16.960 I think that you it is how you have sex, right, because. 283 00:12:16.679 --> 00:12:17.559 There's different things. 284 00:12:17.600 --> 00:12:19.600 I think one of the things for us was just 285 00:12:19.639 --> 00:12:23.799 being able to have phone conversations and you use whatever 286 00:12:23.919 --> 00:12:28.039 tools that you have when you're trying to survive, and 287 00:12:28.039 --> 00:12:30.840 and so I think that it is about one of 288 00:12:30.879 --> 00:12:33.360 the things that help with the discipline was just the 289 00:12:33.360 --> 00:12:35.679 fact that you were on a mission. I knew that 290 00:12:35.759 --> 00:12:38.919 the system was out to destroy my family, not because 291 00:12:38.960 --> 00:12:41.679 the choices that I had made were so heinous, but 292 00:12:41.720 --> 00:12:44.639 because the state launched its own violence against me and 293 00:12:44.679 --> 00:12:47.759 my family for our actions. And so just in that 294 00:12:47.960 --> 00:12:52.679 deep resolve not to succumb to this, Uh, it just 295 00:12:52.759 --> 00:12:55.799 made me fight even harder and knowing that I've got 296 00:12:55.799 --> 00:12:58.279 to stay focused if I'm gonna get this done, if 297 00:12:58.360 --> 00:13:01.120 if we're going to restore our family, we all have 298 00:13:01.279 --> 00:13:02.240 to stay focused. 299 00:13:02.519 --> 00:13:05.639 I applaud you for that. I take that. Thank you 300 00:13:05.759 --> 00:13:07.720 very I mean, it's not easy, you know what I mean, 301 00:13:07.799 --> 00:13:08.759 it's a long time. 302 00:13:08.879 --> 00:13:10.960 You know, you know, you find somebody that your high 303 00:13:10.960 --> 00:13:13.600 school sweetheart you found, you know, you know that that's your match, 304 00:13:13.679 --> 00:13:15.879 but you're like, you're there's something behind or there's something 305 00:13:15.879 --> 00:13:17.919 in front of you that you can't get to that person. 306 00:13:18.000 --> 00:13:19.879 So it's like, what do you do to fill that time? 307 00:13:19.919 --> 00:13:23.159 Did you watch porn? Did you masturbate regularly? Did you 308 00:13:23.519 --> 00:13:24.600 do all these things all of. 309 00:13:24.600 --> 00:13:27.559 The above, okay with my sons in the room. 310 00:13:27.480 --> 00:13:33.080 Yes, yes, yes, yes, because that's human nature. And I think, 311 00:13:33.120 --> 00:13:35.440 you know, even with our incarceration, that was the piece 312 00:13:35.480 --> 00:13:37.240 that we you know, I served two and a half 313 00:13:37.320 --> 00:13:40.519 years in prison myself, and so it was like, how 314 00:13:40.639 --> 00:13:44.159 is it that breaking the law ended up becoming sadistic 315 00:13:44.279 --> 00:13:46.600 enough where people say, well, we're going to remove what 316 00:13:46.799 --> 00:13:50.159 is human about you and your ability to have sexual 317 00:13:50.240 --> 00:13:53.639 intercourse while you're incarcerated. How does that have anything to 318 00:13:53.679 --> 00:13:55.720 do with me breaking the law. So I think that 319 00:13:55.720 --> 00:13:57.879 that's really like a mechanism of control. 320 00:13:58.200 --> 00:13:58.399 One. 321 00:13:58.480 --> 00:14:01.799 It also creates genetical nihilation because when you have men 322 00:14:01.879 --> 00:14:04.159 that you lock up for ten and twenty years, in 323 00:14:04.200 --> 00:14:07.720 particular black men, they can't pro create if they cannot 324 00:14:07.759 --> 00:14:10.240 reach their mates. There's only like five or six states 325 00:14:10.240 --> 00:14:14.799 that have conjugal visits. But again, I'm still human when I. 326 00:14:14.759 --> 00:14:15.360 Break the law. 327 00:14:15.440 --> 00:14:16.600 It wasn't the case for you guys at all. 328 00:14:16.759 --> 00:14:20.799 No, No, it says that I am I am human 329 00:14:21.159 --> 00:14:23.720 when I broke the law. It didn't remove my humanity, 330 00:14:23.759 --> 00:14:27.000 It didn't remove my citizenship. Why in the world does 331 00:14:27.039 --> 00:14:30.840 it remove my sexual activity and my ability? 332 00:14:31.480 --> 00:14:33.840 You're married and it's like a union, and it's like 333 00:14:33.879 --> 00:14:36.759 it's something that is it's a legal paper documentation. So 334 00:14:36.759 --> 00:14:38.840 why wouldn't be able to touch my mate? 335 00:14:39.000 --> 00:14:39.360 Exactly? 336 00:14:39.519 --> 00:14:43.360 I didn't lose that in my criminal in my the 337 00:14:43.399 --> 00:14:46.200 court's decision. So how did that even become a part 338 00:14:46.240 --> 00:14:49.080 of it is really questionable in our society. 339 00:14:49.200 --> 00:14:51.919 So what do you think that needs to be changed 340 00:14:51.960 --> 00:14:54.120 within the system, you know, with going all the stuff 341 00:14:54.120 --> 00:14:56.759 that you've gone through, and like to implement to not 342 00:14:56.879 --> 00:14:58.120 have these things happen again. 343 00:14:58.639 --> 00:15:01.360 I think for Rob and I U an organization called 344 00:15:01.399 --> 00:15:05.799 Participatory Defense Movement NOLA where we train other families in 345 00:15:05.879 --> 00:15:08.840 legal awareness as the best form of defense. When we 346 00:15:09.039 --> 00:15:11.799 entered into this system, we were just like so many others. 347 00:15:11.799 --> 00:15:14.279 We were good people that just made a dumb or 348 00:15:14.320 --> 00:15:18.559 wrong mistake. And so just because we make a mistake, 349 00:15:18.879 --> 00:15:20.559 it doesn't mean that you should have to pay for 350 00:15:20.639 --> 00:15:23.960 it with the rest of your life. And so now 351 00:15:24.000 --> 00:15:26.960 we train other families how to deal with and how 352 00:15:27.000 --> 00:15:31.080 to approach those mistakes when they're made through participatory by 353 00:15:31.200 --> 00:15:34.440 participating in your own defense, which is what you see 354 00:15:34.480 --> 00:15:37.240 in the movie. Time with me making the phone calls, 355 00:15:37.279 --> 00:15:40.039 with me following up with the attorneys and the judge's office, 356 00:15:40.320 --> 00:15:42.799 is just me participating because I'm not just laying on 357 00:15:42.879 --> 00:15:45.279 the sideline for you to decide what you're going to 358 00:15:45.360 --> 00:15:48.759 do about my family. I'm going to actively participate in 359 00:15:48.799 --> 00:15:49.320 the process. 360 00:15:49.360 --> 00:15:51.080 And most people, I'm sure don't know what to do, 361 00:15:51.159 --> 00:15:52.639 Like where do you start? Where do you go through? 362 00:15:52.639 --> 00:15:53.000 You know what I mean? 363 00:15:53.000 --> 00:15:54.559 And that's kind of like I think a beautiful thing 364 00:15:54.600 --> 00:15:57.639 within your documentary is that how you've kind of opened 365 00:15:57.639 --> 00:16:00.279 those doors to let families know that there is things 366 00:16:00.320 --> 00:16:02.159 you can do. That's just because they tell you no 367 00:16:02.240 --> 00:16:04.279 doesn't mean that's no. It means that there is other 368 00:16:04.320 --> 00:16:05.440 things that you can do. You may have to be 369 00:16:05.440 --> 00:16:07.639 a little bit harder and jump through some more hoops unfortunately, 370 00:16:07.720 --> 00:16:10.320 but there is also you know, you just don't give up. 371 00:16:10.559 --> 00:16:13.919 Yes, And I think you know, even with whether it's in incarceration, 372 00:16:14.240 --> 00:16:17.559 whether it's you pursuing a career that others in society 373 00:16:17.639 --> 00:16:21.039 may not see as the best career choice for you, you 374 00:16:20.799 --> 00:16:22.840 still have to fight to get there. I mean, it's like, 375 00:16:22.879 --> 00:16:25.120 I'm proud of you. You had something that you believed 376 00:16:25.159 --> 00:16:27.759 in that you were passionate about. You left your small 377 00:16:27.840 --> 00:16:30.200 town in Texas and came out here to LA and 378 00:16:30.240 --> 00:16:32.799 you are doing, you know, bringing forth what you have 379 00:16:32.919 --> 00:16:35.559 come into this life to do. Because sex is a 380 00:16:35.639 --> 00:16:37.759 very important part of our humanity for sure. 381 00:16:37.799 --> 00:16:39.399 And I feel like, you know, it's you know, if 382 00:16:39.440 --> 00:16:42.240 there're parallels, but very similar in certain things. It's like 383 00:16:42.240 --> 00:16:45.200 where you know, you get ridiculed because you make decisions 384 00:16:45.279 --> 00:16:47.159 or whatever. Just because I made a decision doesn't mean 385 00:16:47.159 --> 00:16:48.840 that's right for you. But that's why I always go 386 00:16:48.879 --> 00:16:50.399 with to each his own what works for me may 387 00:16:50.440 --> 00:16:52.080 not work for you. But work works for you doesn't 388 00:16:52.080 --> 00:16:54.000 work for me either. But you know, within my own lane, 389 00:16:54.000 --> 00:16:55.840 if I'm doing something that I want to do with 390 00:16:55.879 --> 00:16:58.960 mine was in the sex industry, was that's how I 391 00:16:59.000 --> 00:17:01.279 performed or I say, like created my art. That's how 392 00:17:01.320 --> 00:17:03.919 I expressed myself. I was very you know, comfortable in 393 00:17:03.960 --> 00:17:06.599 my own skin. I didn't think that it was I 394 00:17:06.640 --> 00:17:08.559 never felt like used or like something like that. It 395 00:17:08.599 --> 00:17:10.599 was all in my own you know, timeline and what 396 00:17:10.680 --> 00:17:12.680 I wanted to do and portray to the world. And 397 00:17:12.720 --> 00:17:15.519 I feel like I've gotten so much positive feedback throughout 398 00:17:15.559 --> 00:17:18.240 the years about from you know, body imaging and just 399 00:17:18.279 --> 00:17:20.720 like just being comfortable on your own skin and talking 400 00:17:20.759 --> 00:17:23.279 about it. You know, I think education is really important. 401 00:17:23.359 --> 00:17:25.920