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<v Speaker 1>Welcome to Grief podcast. I'm Dylan, and this time together

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<v Speaker 1>is meant for those moments when a memory wave arrives

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<v Speaker 1>while you are right in the middle of work. You

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<v Speaker 1>might be typing an email or sorting through papers, and

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<v Speaker 1>suddenly the thought of your person is there, pulling your

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<v Speaker 1>attention away. These sudden hits show up often during the

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<v Speaker 1>day because the mind keeps its own schedule even when

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<v Speaker 1>the clock says otherwise. Today's focus practice is a sixty

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<v Speaker 1>second softened pause that gives the wave a little room

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<v Speaker 1>without pulling you completely out of what you need to finish.

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<v Speaker 1>Many people notice the same thing at their desks or

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<v Speaker 1>in meetings, because grief does not wait for a quiet hour. Instead,

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<v Speaker 1>it slips in between tasks and asks for a moment

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<v Speaker 1>of attention. We can meet it with a short pause

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<v Speaker 1>US that softens the edges rather than pushing the feeling away.

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<v Speaker 1>Since the wave has already arrived, we can begin right

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<v Speaker 1>where you are, let your hands rest for a moment,

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<v Speaker 1>if that feels possible, and notice the surface under them.

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<v Speaker 1>The pause works by letting the memory stay present while

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<v Speaker 1>you stay present with the task in front of you

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<v Speaker 1>at the same time. Although it lasts only sixty seconds.

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<v Speaker 1>The practice creates a small space that keeps the wave

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<v Speaker 1>from growing larger. You might feel the tightness in your

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<v Speaker 1>chest or the quick shift in your thoughts, and that

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<v Speaker 1>is part of how these waves move. The soften pause

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<v Speaker 1>meets that shift with a gentle acknowledgment instead of a

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<v Speaker 1>demand to stop or continue, as if nothing happened. While

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<v Speaker 1>you stay seated at your desk or wherever the day

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<v Speaker 1>has you. The pause can travel with the memory for

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<v Speaker 1>those sixty seconds and then let you return to the

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<v Speaker 1>next small step. Since the wave is already here, you

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<v Speaker 1>can pause for just a minute it stop what you

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<v Speaker 1>are doing. Notice where your body has tightened. It might

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<v Speaker 1>be in your chest, or your neck, or your hands.

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<v Speaker 1>Take that awareness and let your shoulders drop a little lower,

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<v Speaker 1>let your jaw relax, let your belly soften. As you

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<v Speaker 1>breathe out, you can say to yourself, it is okay

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<v Speaker 1>to feel this. Now, hold that softening for a moment,

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<v Speaker 1>notice how it feels. Then, if the wave is still moving,

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<v Speaker 1>you can repeat the softening once more. Meanwhile, the practice

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<v Speaker 1>stays short because it fits into the middle of your

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<v Speaker 1>day without taking over. Although it only takes about sixty seconds,

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<v Speaker 1>it gives the memory a little space. Instead of pushing through,

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<v Speaker 1>you allow the body to ease. Therefore, the tightness releases

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<v Speaker 1>bit by bit while you continue with your task. The

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<v Speaker 1>wave moves alongside you, rather than stopping you completely. The

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<v Speaker 1>mechanism works because tension often gathers first in those same

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<v Speaker 1>spots when a memory surfaces. Softening interrupts that pattern before

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<v Speaker 1>it grows strong. Since the body responds quickly to a

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<v Speaker 1>simple release, the mind follows with less resistance. However, the

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<v Speaker 1>wave itself does not disappear on command. It simply meets

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<v Speaker 1>less opposition so it can pass through more freely. In fact,

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<v Speaker 1>many people notice that the same memory returns later with

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<v Speaker 1>less force after they have practiced this pause once or twice.

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<v Speaker 1>Although the change feels small, it adds up because the

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<v Speaker 1>body learns a new response over repeated midday moments. You

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<v Speaker 1>might wonder what to do if the wave feels stronger

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<v Speaker 1>than usual. In that case, you can extend the softening

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<v Speaker 1>by one extra exhale without forcing anything deeper. The key

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<v Speaker 1>remains the same. Stop notice soften on the outbreath, Say

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<v Speaker 1>the short phrase if it helps, then return to what

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<v Speaker 1>you were doing. Meanwhile, the whole sequence keeps its sixty

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<v Speaker 1>second limits, so it does not pull you away from

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<v Speaker 1>the rest of your afternoon. Because the pause is brief,

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<v Speaker 1>if it becomes something you can reach for even when

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<v Speaker 1>time feels tight. The reality is that memory waves arrive

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<v Speaker 1>without warning, and they rarely match the schedule you had

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<v Speaker 1>in mind. This practice offers one steady place to meet them.

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<v Speaker 1>It does not ask you to change the memory or

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<v Speaker 1>to move past it. Instead, it gives the body a

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<v Speaker 1>brief chance to loosen the grip that often comes with

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<v Speaker 1>sudden recall. Therefore, the rest of your day can continue

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<v Speaker 1>with a little more room around the edges. You can

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<v Speaker 1>try this same sequence again later if another wave appears.

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<v Speaker 1>The steps stay consistent because consistency helps the body recognize

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<v Speaker 1>the signal. Stop what you are doing. Notice the tightening,

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<v Speaker 1>soften shoulders, jaw, and belly. On the exhale, use the

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<v Speaker 1>phrase when it feels right. Since the timing stays near

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<v Speaker 1>sixty seconds, the practice remains practical for any midday setting.

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<v Speaker 1>Although the wave may still carry sadness or longing, the

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<v Speaker 1>added tension does not have to stay. This midday pause

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<v Speaker 1>to soften memory wave gives you one clear way to

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<v Speaker 1>meet what has already arrived. When you soften during that pause,

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<v Speaker 1>the body gets a chance to let go of the

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<v Speaker 1>tension Grief often stores in the chest or shoulders. Because

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<v Speaker 1>the memory surfaces without warning, those muscles tighten first, and

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<v Speaker 1>the softening gives them room to ease instead of holding on.

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<v Speaker 1>The brief pause works in the same way by keeping

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<v Speaker 1>the memory from growing into something larger right away, while

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<v Speaker 1>you still need to finish what you started. A study

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<v Speaker 1>published in the Journal of Traumatic Stress showed that this

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<v Speaker 1>kind of somatic regulation can help the body stay steadier

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<v Speaker 1>during emotional waves. Researchers at the authors listed in that

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<v Speaker 1>paper described how small physical releases support the system without

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<v Speaker 1>requiring a full stop. You might notice the difference in

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<v Speaker 1>how your breath moves after you try the softening once

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<v Speaker 1>or twice. Although the wave does not disappear, the intensity

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<v Speaker 1>often settles enough for you to keep going. Meanwhile, the

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<v Speaker 1>practice fits into a midday moment because it asks for

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<v Speaker 1>only a minute and then lets you return to the

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<v Speaker 1>task at hand. Since memory waves arrive on their own schedule,

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<v Speaker 1>this short step gives you something reliable to turn to

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<v Speaker 1>without changing the rest of your afternoon. The reality is

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<v Speaker 1>that these pauses add up over time. Because each one

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<v Speaker 1>interrupts the build before it takes over. You can use

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<v Speaker 1>the same sequence again later if another wave shows up

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<v Speaker 1>while you work. Ultimately, the approach stays simple, so it

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<v Speaker 1>remains available even on days when focus feels scattered. You

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<v Speaker 1>might find that returning to the softening becomes easier the

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<v Speaker 1>more you practice it in these ordinary moments. You can

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<v Speaker 1>return to this softened pause anytime another memory wave arrives

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<v Speaker 1>later today, because the same steps work whether you stand

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<v Speaker 1>at a counter or sit at a desk. Since the

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<v Speaker 1>practice asks only for sixty seconds, it slips between other

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<v Speaker 1>tasks without forcing you to stop everything. Bookmark the episode

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<v Speaker 1>now so the next wave finds the guidance already waiting,

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<v Speaker 1>instead of leaving you to search Meanwhile, the study published

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<v Speaker 1>in the Journal of Traumatic Stress showed how somatic regulation

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<v Speaker 1>helps the body stay steadier once tension begins to gather.

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<v Speaker 1>Although the wave itself may still rise, the pause gives

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<v Speaker 1>those spots in the chest or shoulders a chance to

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<v Speaker 1>loosen before the tightness spreads further. Therefore, you might notice

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<v Speaker 1>the shift feels smaller each time you repeat the sequence,

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<v Speaker 1>even if the memory stays just as clear. If this

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<v Speaker 1>podcast helps you make sense of your shit. Join our

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<v Speaker 1>Supporters Club for three dollars a month that brings ad

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<v Speaker 1>free listening and early episodes. Independent media only stays alive

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<v Speaker 1>when listeners back it. You can find the link to

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<v Speaker 1>join in the episode description. Ultimately, I hope the rest

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<v Speaker 1>of your day moves forward with a little more room

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<v Speaker 1>to breathe, even when the waves keep coming.