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Speaker 1: The confession by Gui de Monpassant. Marguerite de Terelle was dying.

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Although but fifty six, she seemed like seventy five. At least,

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she panted paler than the sheets, shaken by dreadful shiverings.

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Her face convulsed, her eyes haggard, as if she had

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seen some horrible thing. Her eldest sister, Suzanne, six years older,

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sobbed on her knees beside the bed. A little table,

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drawn close to the couch of the dying woman and

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covered with a napkin, bore two lighted candles, the priest

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being momentarily expected to give extreme unction and the communion,

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which should be the last. The apartment had that sinister aspect,

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that air of hopeless farewells which belongs to the chambers

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of the dying. Medicine bottles stood about on the furniture.

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Linen lay in the corners, pushed aside by foot or broom.

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The disordered chairs themselves seemed affrighted, as if they had run.

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In all the senses of the word death. The formidable

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was there hidden waiting. The story of the two sisters

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was very touching. It was quoted far and wide. It

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had made many eyes to weep. Suzanne, the elder, had

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once been madly in love with a young man who

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had also been in love with her. They were engaged

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and were only waiting the day fixed for the contract

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when Henry de Lampierre suddenly died. The despair of the

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young girl was dreadful, and she vowed that she would

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never marry. She kept her word. She put on widow's weeds,

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which she never took off. Then her sister, her little sister, Marguerite,

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who was only twelve years old, came one morning to

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throw herself into the arms of the elder and said,

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big sister, I do not want thee to be unhappy.

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I do not want thee to cry all thy life.

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I will never leave thee never never, ay, I too,

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shall never marry. I shall stay with thee always, always always. Suzanne,

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touched by the devotion of the child, kissed her but

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did not believe. Yet the little one also kept her word,

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and despite the entreaties of her parents, despite the supplications

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of the elder, she never married. She was pretty, very pretty.

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She refused many a young man who seemed to love

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her truly, and she never left her sister more. They

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lived together all the days of their life, without ever

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being separated a single time. They went side by side,

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inseparably united. But Marguerite seemed always sad, oppressed, more melancholy

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than the elder, as though perhaps her sublime sacrifice had

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broken her spirit. She aged more quickly, had white hair

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from the age of thirty, and often suffering, seemed afflicted

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by some secret, gnawing trouble. Now she was to be

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the first to die, since yesterday she was no longer

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able to speak. She had only said, at the first

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glimmers of day dawn, go fetch monsieur le coret. The

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moment has come, and she had remained since then upon

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her back shaken with spasms, her lips agitated, as though

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dreadful words were mounting from her heart without power of issue.

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Her look mad with fear, terrible to see her sister

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torn by sorrow. Wept wildly, her forehead resting on the

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edge of the bed, and kept repeating, Margot, My poor Margot,

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my little one. She had always called her little one,

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just as the younger had always called her big sister.

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Steps were heard on the stairs, the door opened, A

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choir boy appeared, followed by an old priest in a surplice.

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As soon as she perceived him, the dying woman, with

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one shudder, sat up, opened her lips, stammered two or

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three words, and began to scratch the sheets with her nails,

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as if she had wished to make a hole. The

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abbe Simon approached, took her hand, kissed her brow, and

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with a soft voice, God, pardon thee, my child, have courage.

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The moment is now come. Speak. Then, Marguerite, shivering from

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head to foot, shaking her whole couch with nervous moments, stammered,

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sit down, big sister, listen. The priest bent down towards Suzan,

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who was still flung upon the bed's foot. He raised her,

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placed her in her arm chair, and, taking a hand

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of each of the sisters in one of his own,

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he pronounced, Lord, my God, and do them with strength,

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cast thy mercy upon them. And Marguerite began to speak.

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The words issued from her throat, one by one, rocus

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with sharp pauses, as though very feeble. Pardon, pardon, big sister,

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Oh forgive If thou knewest how I have had fear

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of this moment all my life, Suzan stammered through her tears.

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Forgive thee what little one Thou hast given all to me,

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sacrificed everything. Thou art an angel. But Marguerite interrupted her, Hush, hush,

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let me speak. Do not stop me. It is dreadful.

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Let me tell all to the very end, without flinching. Listen,

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Thou rememberest. Henry Suzanne trembled and looked at her sister.

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The younger continued, Thou must hear all to understand. I

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was twelve years old, only twelve years old, thou rememberest. Well,

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is it not so? And I was spoiled. I did

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everything that I liked. Thou rememberest. Surely how they spoiled me? Listen?

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The first time that he came, he had varnished boots.

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He got down from his horse at the great steps,

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and he begged pardon for his costume. But he came

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to bring some news to Papa. Thou rememberest, Is it

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not so? Don't speak listen. When I saw him, I

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was completely carried away. I found him so very beautiful,

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and I remained standing in a corner of the salon

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all the time that he was talking. Children are strange

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and terrible. Oh yes, I have dreamed of all that.

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He came back again several times. I looked at him

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with all my eyes, with all my soul. I was

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large of my age and very much more knowing than

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anyone thought. He came back often. I thought only of him.

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I said, very low, Henry, Henry de Lampierre. Then they

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said that he was going to marry thee. It was

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a sorrow, oh, big sister, A sorrow, A sorrow. I

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cried for three nights without sleeping. He came back every

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day in the afternoon after his lunch. Thou rememberest, Is

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it not so? Say nothing? Listen? Thou madest him cakes

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which he liked, with meal, with butter and milk. Oh,

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I know well how I could make them, Yet if

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it were needed, he ate them at one mouthful, and

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and then he drank a glass of wine. And then

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he said it is delicious. Thou rememberest how he would

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say that? I was jealous? Jealous? The moment of thy

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marriage approached, there were only two weeks more. I became crazy.

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I said to myself, he shall not marry Suzanne. No,

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I will not have it. It is I whom he

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will marry when I am grown up. I shall never

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find any one whom I love so much. But one night,

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ten days before the contract, thou tookst a walk with

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him in front of the chateau by moonlight, and there

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under the fir, under the great fur, he kissed thee, kissed,

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holding thee in his two arms. So long thou rememberest,

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is it not so? It was probably the first time. Yes,

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thou wast so pale. When thou earnest back to the salon,

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I had seen you too. I was there in the shrubbery.

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I was angry. If I could, I should have killed

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you both. I said to myself, he shall not marry Suzan. Never,

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he shall marry no one. I should be too unhappy.

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And all of a sudden I began to hate him dreadfully.

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Then dost thou know what I did? Listen? I had

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seen the gardener making little balls to kill strange dogs.

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He pounded up a bottle with a stone and put

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the powdered glass in a little ball of meat. I

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took a little medicine bottle that Mamma had. I broke

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it small with a hammer, and I hid the glass

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in my pocket. It was a shining powder. The next day,

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as soon as you had made the little cakes. I

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split them with a knife, and I put in the glass.

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He ate three of them. I too, I ate one.

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I threw the other six into the pond. The two

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swans died three days after. Do thou remember, oh, say nothing. Listen, Listen,

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I alone did not die, but I have always been sick.

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Listen he died. Thou knowest well. Listen that that is nothing.

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It is afterwards later always the worst. Listen my life,

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all my life, what torture. I said to myself. I

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will never leave my sister. And at the hour of death,

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I will tell her all there and ever since. I

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have always thought of that moment when I should tell

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thee all. Now it is come. It is terrible, Oh,

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big sister. I have always thought morning and evening, by

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night and by day. Some time I must tell her

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that I waited. What agony? It is done. Say nothing now.

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I am afraid. I am afraid. Oh, I am afraid.

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If I am going to see him again, soon when

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I am dead, see him again. Think of it the

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first before thou I shall not dare I must. I

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am going to die. I want you to forgive me.

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I want it. I cannot go off to meet him.

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Without that, Oh, tell her to forgive me, monsieur le core,

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Tell her, I implore you to do it. I cannot

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die without that. She was silent and remained panting, always

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scratching the sheet with her withered nails. Suzan had hidden

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her face in her hands and did not move. She

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was thinking of him, whom she might have loved so long,

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What a good life they should have had together. She

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saw him once again, in that vanished, by gone time,

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and that old past which was put out forever, the

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beloved dead. How they tear your hearts. Oh, that kiss,

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his only kiss. She had hidden it in her soul,

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and after it nothing nothing more, her whole life long.

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All of a sudden, the priest stood straight, and with

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the strong, vibrant voice, he cried, mademoiselle Suzanne, your sister

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is dying. Then Suzan, opening her hands, showed her face

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soaked with tears, and throwing herself upon her sister, she

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kissed her with all her might, stammering, I forgive thee,

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I forgive thee little one,