Speaker 1: And welcome back to Dumb and Dangerous. Everybody, please introduce yourselves.
Speaker 2: I'm Jimmy and I am the dungeon Master.
Speaker 3: Hey, I'm Brandon. I'll be playing Sir Hogan. He is
literally just Hulk Hogan as a dwarf.
Speaker 4: Hi.
Speaker 5: I'm Elise. I'm going to be playing Larry the Satyr.
He is medium sized sadr at about five to eleven
in height and he's got brown hair.
Speaker 1: I'm Producer Blake and I'll be playing Hamnlik. I am
a tee fling that's about medium size. He's six foot
he weighs roughly one hundred and eighty five pounds, with
broken horns and dark blue skin.
Speaker 4: Hey, my name is Baron and I will be playing Beltrazor.
Beltrazor is an older human man with silvery hair, a
kind heart nature, and a talent for the arcane arts.
Speaker 2: All right, we're going to start to start the session
off as per usual. Who would like to give a
good recap of the previous session for a free inspiration?
Speaker 3: Die, Sir Hogan. We'll take this one, all right. All right,
So the whole party wakes up to allow commotion and
immediately runs into that elf woman's room and grabs his
pants and so what Everyone walks down to the main
tavern area and these bandits are hustling through trying to
find something, asking the bartender a bunch of questions. But
with a combination of intimidation and some crab walking by Hamlick,
we successfully save the barkeep and we run outside and
make a bandit sol himself. So when we find the
bandit leader, he's arguing with Windhelm, claiming that Windhelm stole something.
They have a long back and forth. Sir Hogan and
Bathezor go and speak with the bandit leader, and Wilhelm
and Larry and Handlick go off and investigate the barn
while no one's watching. In the barn, they find Handlelick's
long lost chicken, handlet chick with a magic is it
an amulet that makes him grow ten feet high. So
when they find that handle Lick bus had a huge
cry of excitement, which alerts everyone else. The bandit leader,
will Helm, and Sir Hogan and Bathezor all run single
file like one by one into the barn and then
Handlelick activates the amulet and makes the chicken grow ten
feet tall. The bandit leader and will Helmler so intimidated
by this that they let him take the chicken on
our way, And before we all roughed the sunset, Sir
Hogan remembers he forgot all his armor up in his room,
so he has to go run and get that hospeck
on the chicken, and everyone rides merrily into the sunrise.
Speaker 4: All right, that was beautiful.
Speaker 3: Did I forget anything important? No?
Speaker 2: That was pretty good. I can't think of anything like important.
Speaker 3: Did I? Did I say hamdl the lick instead?
Speaker 1: You said the chick? And that hurt my feeling?
Speaker 4: How there you?
Speaker 2: I'm sorry, But actually he didn't forget something extremely important
that happened. Hamlick spent like ten minutes crab walking without.
Speaker 3: Yeah, I've have loshed over the amount of crab walking
that happened a lot.
Speaker 2: For a game of D and D. There was a
weird amount of crab walking.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you guys are all right. That was beautiful.
Speaker 2: Yeah, Larry and Beltrazor on the horseback of the tool
horses that you guys all brought, and Sir Hogan and
Hamnlick on the back of the great Hamna Chick. You
are all beginning to make your way and then just
as you kind of make a turn and kind of
get out of sight from everyone back at the farm,
Hamdlick and sir Hogan, you kind of just fall. Can
I get both of you to go ahead and make
a deck sterity saving throw for me?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 1: Okay, off the off ham the chick. We just fail.
Speaker 2: You just get to it. You just fall, rolling Dick stirity, Okay.
Speaker 1: Okay, I did it. Oh it does kind of Oh eighteen.
Speaker 2: Yep, both got eighteen excellent, all right, so you guys
don't take any damage. You kind of catch yourself enough. Hamlet,
that is when you remember, oh, yeah, this chicken only
becomes that size for like tennish minutes every day.
Speaker 4: Ah, so that's from what you.
Speaker 2: Were able to figure out of the amulet a long
time ago, is how to get it into that size,
But it only lasts for about tennish minutes, and then
the next morning it is able to do so again.
Speaker 4: And so it guys kind of fall on your butts,
was that, Hamlet.
Speaker 1: Hamla Lake forgot?
Speaker 3: No?
Speaker 2: Yeah, yes, you kind of dust yourselves off. I'm assuming
you pick up Hamna chick.
Speaker 4: Of course, of course, of course, do you still have Gertrude,
you're back.
Speaker 1: Remember, Sar Hogan was stroking while we rode off.
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, okay, So your hamdlick is holding his chicken
hand to chick who as you all kind of note
the colors of the feathers are different now than before,
while on his back he still has the potato sack
with the chicken head sticking out. Gertrude, M. She's all nothing,
not freaking out right now, Sir Hogan. You're kind of
walking alongside the horses, and you guys are making your
way directly to Morrington, which you know would be about
a three day trip. You guys begin making your way.
You guys go through the town afarestead again, is there
anything he has want to do as you're passing through here?
Speaker 4: He's want to keep going.
Speaker 3: I need to refill up the road beers.
Speaker 2: I thought you already did. I thought you did so
at the tavern.
Speaker 3: Well they're all gone now from ours like an hour.
It was a it was a wild morning. It's a
wild morning, all right. Yeah.
Speaker 2: You hopefully these ones last you more than like two hours?
Speaker 3: Yeah? Yeah?
Speaker 1: Is there anything in town that's worth note?
Speaker 4: Not really, You guys came through earlier.
Speaker 2: Like I said, there's a couple of like market stalls,
but nothing really of note. The only reason why this
town has some sort of a populace is because of
that famous farm slash in for travelers.
Speaker 1: Is there any like place to get some chicken feed
that I can store in my pocket?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Sure, yeah you can read just we can just say
you refill on chicken feed.
Speaker 1: Perfect. I want to fit them in all my pockets.
Speaker 4: Got you stuff. Your pocket's full of chicken feed.
Speaker 1: I also have like cargo type pants, but they're more
like makeshift cargo pants like I sowed poorly sewed like
pockets on them for chicken seed.
Speaker 4: It's beautiful. Yeah.
Speaker 2: Instead of like the pockets going into the pants, they're
just hanging on the outside.
Speaker 4: My car goes yeah, yeah, I love it.
Speaker 1: That's all from him in the lik.
Speaker 2: Yes, you guys continue making way. First day goes fine,
you travel, It starts to come nighttime. Do you guys
continue on or you go ahead and stop and rest
for the night.
Speaker 4: I might be brutn to rest for the night. My
old bones can only take so much.
Speaker 3: They're hooking with like a little shut eye.
Speaker 6: Okay, okay, you all make camp do you guys take
any turns like on watch or do you guys just
all go to sleep and we all sign watches.
Speaker 4: I will take the last watch since I'm up early
early in the morning.
Speaker 3: Anyway, they're hoping we'll take the first watch.
Speaker 4: Okay, hey, felaws.
Speaker 1: Can you guys like I'll put him on a leash.
Can you guys watch him the chick while you're up.
I don't want him to get too cranky. I'll put
him on a leash for you. I hear some rope tie.
I want to tie around a leash, like tight enough
to hold the chicken where it can't escape, but yeah,
enough where it doesn't chunk it.
Speaker 2: I'd like to know you don't have like a harness
that this goes on to or like a typical leash.
This is a hempen rope probably at least like a
good inch to two inches in thickness. He kind of
has around this chicken as a leash.
Speaker 1: I also want to without I'll roll for it. I
don't care while Sir Hogan is not looking. I want
to dip that hemp rope. The part is gonna go
around the chicken's neck in the road. Beer that way
like soaks it so it doesn't like leave any herds
on the chicken.
Speaker 4: Go ahead and make a sleight of hand.
Speaker 3: I guess all right, I go that. I was about
to ask if I could do like a perception checker.
Speaker 4: Yeah, you can make a perception check against it.
Speaker 1: I got a mine, yes.
Speaker 2: So what happens is you begin to dip it in
the road beer just as Hogan like kinds of turns
around and he looks and like says something to you.
You are like frozen, You're like, oh, shoot, he caught me.
He says something, and then he just kind of turns
back around, not really noticing what you're doing.
Speaker 3: Perfect. We'll say that's one of my extra road beers,
because I've definitely got one in hand.
Speaker 2: Oh yes, oh yes, oh yes, all right you do, so,
sir Hogan, take first. Watch Belcher's doors taken last handle it.
Speaker 1: I'll I'll take second. And I want to keep Gertrude
like strung up beside me, like I guess on the
under like on a tree branch under a tree, I'm sleeping.
Speaker 2: I guess okay, And she's still on the potato sack.
She has not really cared about getting out.
Speaker 1: She's my little she's my little Gertrude.
Speaker 2: All right, sir Hogan, Everyone lays down around the fire
that's going to sleep. Go ahead and make perception check
for me for the night.
Speaker 3: Already rolling perception, I got an eight, an eight.
Speaker 2: Again again, kind of boring you, kind of sip on
your road beers. Nothing really much of note happens you see,
like maybe some little critters off the distance.
Speaker 3: Can I start humming a pink pony in wow? Sit
there and watch?
Speaker 4: Yes, you absolutely do.
Speaker 2: As your watch comes to a close. Up next is Hamlick.
So you go over and wake up Handlick and you
go off to sleep yourself. Can you go ahead make
a perception check for me, Hamlick?
Speaker 1: I sure can. I got a twenty two, not twenty.
Speaker 2: A natural twenty for a twenty two. Nothing escapes your view.
You see everything, and in the chick.
Speaker 1: You see this, and.
Speaker 2: That's it for your watch. Nothing really happens. Up next
is gonna be Larry's. Let me go ahead and roll
for Larry today. Whatld Larry get a nine? Doesn't notice anything?
I don't have anyone to talk to, So up next.
Speaker 4: We'll be belchers or all right, belch or rolled one
better than Larry A ten. Yeah, y'all did.
Speaker 2: Y'all did pretty bad except for Hamlet, good Lord, everything.
Speaker 4: For everyone else.
Speaker 1: My luck's turning around, baby.
Speaker 4: Yeah, so.
Speaker 3: You did.
Speaker 2: No one notices really anything of importance that happens.
Speaker 4: You're in their watch.
Speaker 2: You all wake up and begin to journey on your
second day anything of no As we get going.
Speaker 1: I'm going to leave the leash on ham the chick
and let him like just kind of walk so you
can get his exercise for the day.
Speaker 2: Absolutely, I needn't even need to You don't even need
to put a leash on ham the Chick. He just
kind of stays near you. He doesn't really want to
run off, But you can put a leash on him
if you'd like.
Speaker 1: I'll do. It's how he knows I'm there. I'm doing
this for him.
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, all right? Can I get a I forgot
to ask for yesterday? Can I get a marching order
for you?
Speaker 4: Guys? You have two one horses.
Speaker 3: It's probably the two horses in the front kind of
like side beside, and then just me and hamel Lick
in the back. Oh yes, no, I'm probably on my
horse now.
Speaker 4: Okay, Belchersor Belcherzor was going to He's going to try
and be in the middle. Uh, you know, not in
the front, but just behind the big muscular tanky folks.
Speaker 2: All right, sorry, did you say you are on horse
or no?
Speaker 4: Belcherzor will be on his horse.
Speaker 2: Okay, so be kind of the middle. Sir Hogan's in
front with the horse him lick.
Speaker 4: Where are you at first?
Speaker 1: Uh, Sir Hogan, would you hold hand the chick while
you drive and I'll take care of Gertrude. No problem, brother,
I'm gonna ride with my arms like one arm around
Sir Hogan with my head on his shoulder and then
petting Gertrude behind my back.
Speaker 3: Okay, okay, all right, got I've got hand mood hand
a chick and like one hand kind of got like
my arm wrapped around her, and then the other one
I got my road beer. I'm like kind of like
giving her a ship of it.
Speaker 4: That's beautiful.
Speaker 2: Is getting drunk to day for griss's on. You all
are just making your way, nothing much of note. You
maybe see a traveler two going along the same path.
You start to cut through a forest a little bit
because you know it'll save you about half a day's
worth of travel than just taking the main roads. And
as you're coming up onto is you're falling the trail
on like your I'm up onto an area where on
either side there's kind of a almost a cliff edge.
It looks as if someone like kind of almost carved
through this little bit for a flat trail. And you
do see someone walk out from behind one of those hills.
Speaker 4: He is.
Speaker 2: Armed with a scimitar on his side. You see a
long bow on his back, and he's kind of just
waving asking for you all to stop about. He's about yeah,
he's say about. He's about fifty feet from you all. At
this point, I thought you meant tall.
Speaker 1: Hey, hey, guys, I think we should keep going. That
guy looks spooky.
Speaker 3: Can I do a can I check like kind of
like examine him to see if he looks like a
bandit like an abandon vibe from him?
Speaker 4: Yeah, go ahead, make an insight check. Ohicht also MI
to see if he can't get to any vibes off
of him, whether he's a ruffian or a just upstanding citizen.
Need of help? Okay, I rolled a thirteen all right
beltrazor you're only rolled a six.
Speaker 2: Oh, this is just a fine young gentleman.
Speaker 4: He's a good guy.
Speaker 3: Guys.
Speaker 1: Come on, can I also roll just to make sure?
Speaker 4: Okay, yes, yes he can.
Speaker 1: I got a ten.
Speaker 2: You don't get much honestly, but granted thirteen into ten
for sir Hogan and handlick. This isn't just some some traveler.
This is clearly someone stopping you, probably not for a
great purpose.
Speaker 1: Okay, guys, I think this is an upstanding go man.
I think this guy is one of them scammers. I
think we should go.
Speaker 3: Are we kind of have we stopped moving on our
horses right now, or are we like kind of trotting
towards it towards him bandit? That's what I'm asking. I
kind of like trot a little on my horse, get
a little in front of the other gang, and then
I kind of stopped, so I still at some distance
between this guy and I kind of like shout out
to him, excuse me, sir, you have any more beer
on you?
Speaker 7: Uh?
Speaker 4: No, no, I do not. However, there is a toll
to get through these parts.
Speaker 1: Guys, don't trust the troll gole.
Speaker 4: I gonna need about twenty gold from each of you
in order to get on through.
Speaker 1: You can suck my hamna. Chick.
Speaker 4: Oh you're what? What's a deep toll?
Speaker 1: Ma? You you're not getting my money?
Speaker 4: I'm sorry, man, I was unaware that this was a
toll road here. Gentlemen, surely we can go around.
Speaker 2: Ah No, I'm sorry afraid not. Orders are to keep
this pretty long down. I hear it's from the king himself.
Speaker 3: He doesn't look like a night or guard, does he.
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 3: No, okay, buddy, we just rolled with the King not
days ago. You ain't one of them guards.
Speaker 4: Wow, mighty perceptive.
Speaker 1: Of you, guys. He's one of them scammers.
Speaker 2: He's looking at it, at him. Look he's saying, he
that he looks familiar. Cannot place it either way. I
need y'all to go ahead and pay the toll. Don't
want anything bad to happen or have to turn you away.
Speaker 3: Okay, how about you give us twenty gold some more
beer and we let you live.
Speaker 2: I don't think you understand the situation here, boss. And
then out from behind the hills on either side that
you see two more guys kind of come around and
start and flank him a little bit.
Speaker 4: Is this a robbery? Like I said, it's just a toll. Please,
I'm begging you ill kill you all?
Speaker 3: Can Can I intimidate him? Or go ahead and hammle
so veltor Zora.
Speaker 2: As you say that, he starts smiling as you say,
I'm begging you, and then as it kind of registers
whenever you say they'll kill you all, he goes, huh.
Speaker 4: They're full up their sy. You don't understand. And if
that counts as a help action to whatever intimidate role
either of these other people are about to make, I
will happily say that's a help action for whatever the
next intimidate role will be.
Speaker 2: Okay, do either of you attempt to intimidate?
Speaker 1: Yes?
Speaker 3: Can I like lift my hammer with one hand and
kind of flex my muscles and go the name Sir
Hogan retired gladiator champion. You may have heard of me,
and I kind of like a pose.
Speaker 2: Okay, that's beautiful, Go ahead and roll intimidation with advantage
for me.
Speaker 4: I got forty four twenty. Oh my gosh.
Speaker 2: He kind of takes a step back, Sir Hogan. He
kind of looks at the other two. They're little, they're
kind of scared. Uh uh, all.
Speaker 4: Right, Okay, okay, yeah, yeah, sorry, my apologies.
Speaker 2: They begin to back up a little bit.
Speaker 4: I suppose we should move han ghentlemen, I'll look at
the three young men. Thank you wait so much to
live for weight?
Speaker 3: Bethis I believe I asked for twenty gold?
Speaker 2: I don't. I don't have any gold on me.
Speaker 3: Can what about beer?
Speaker 2: No beer? No, we're just for just we were just
sit out here to get money from what he comes through.
Speaker 4: No.
Speaker 2: Sorry, the first purse people we saw today.
Speaker 4: Rethink your occupation. You are heel belt hold out two
tiny fingers that you can't even distinguish how far apart
they are. What this clothes to a horrible decapitation? You
see that Hambra's not for show. Pace, pace to join
an orphanage or something, help take care of the lost
and whatnot. And just oh, it's so sad to see
such promising young men wereduced to a life of banditry
and savagery. Shall we go, gentlemen, they don't have any
money or beer, I.
Speaker 1: Reckon, So hold on. I want to try to intimidate
them to give me one of their weapons.
Speaker 4: Okay, go and roll intimidation.
Speaker 1: Okay, do I need to tell you what I'm doing,
or just go ahead and roll you could?
Speaker 3: Yeah, what do you?
Speaker 4: What do you say? What do you do?
Speaker 1: I get up on the I still like, as the
horse stopped, let's.
Speaker 4: Go ahead and make that I I assume, so.
Speaker 1: Okay, I want to stand on the back of the
horse slowly say away. I don't like to startle the horse.
I want to lift you.
Speaker 3: Okay.
Speaker 1: I want to pick up ham in the chicken, put
them above my head and be like, you give me
one of your weapons, or it gets dirty.
Speaker 4: And cast guides on himself for praying to us God,
roll a dexterity check for me handle it, because that's
because you hopped on Beltrazor's horse to do so.
Speaker 1: No, no, no, no, we're on me and uh, sir Hogan
er on the horse.
Speaker 4: Are you riding with Sir Hogan? Yeah you were behind.
Speaker 1: No no, remember, I'm like hanging on to him. I
got one arm around his waist, head on shoulder, and
I've got i'm pett.
Speaker 2: Okay, that's right either way. Else, still need you to
go and make a deck dirty check because that's not
an easy feat.
Speaker 1: I got a seventeen.
Speaker 2: Okay, yeah, you stand up with the chicken. Uh, now
you can go and roll in tipidation.
Speaker 1: I got a seventeen.
Speaker 2: He kind of looks around. Yeah, Sture throws down his scimitar.
Then he knows. He reaches back and he starts to
pull out a horn.
Speaker 4: I don't do it.
Speaker 3: You've done it now, Sonny.
Speaker 4: You had so much to look for.
Speaker 2: And as he does so, you notice on the cliff
edge on either cliff, fetch two more bandits on either
side with bows at the ready, and you can see
two more from the on the ground from the guys
ahead of you began approaching, and I'm gonna need you
to roll an isie before me.
Speaker 3: Oh okay?
Speaker 4: Was I able to get that guidance on myself off
as Hamnlik was attempting his intimidation?
Speaker 2: Uh? Sorry, we're you were trying to get You were
doing guidance as you were as he was doing that intimidation.
Speaker 4: Yes, then, yes, okay, I will add it to my
initiative real fast then, as guidance can be added to
initiatives usually fun fact.
Speaker 2: So wait, is that okay? Is that a twenty seven?
Speaker 3: Yes?
Speaker 4: I have a twenty seven partition? Oh my good lord?
Speaker 3: Okay, oh man, what's ready?
Speaker 2: Can you can can go ahead and roll it again
to put it onto this thing, and then I will
change it to twenty seven. Same thing for you, sir Hogan.
Speaker 3: You do what? Okay? Can you?
Speaker 2: If you roll again, you're initiative. I'll let you keep
this one. Let's go, hamlik.
Speaker 1: Yes, I got nineteen.
Speaker 2: Okay, let me roll for Larry. Y'all a rolling, good Jesus. Okay, okay,
Larry got in an eight. Roll for the bandits. Okay, whoa, okay?
We cooth both the Scimitar and the bo having bandits
rolled a natural twenty, so they're both gonna have twenty
one bandits twenty one starting off, we're going to have
belchers or are you gonna do? Buddy? Everyone can see
what's going on, right yepkay.
Speaker 1: Uh.
Speaker 4: I'm on a horse, correct, Yes you are, that's true.
Just good standard riding horse. What's the movement speed of
the animals?
Speaker 3: It is like.
Speaker 4: Riding raised standard.
Speaker 2: What do you think it's just it's just gonna be
a riding horse. Nothing's fan Yeah, sixty feet.
Speaker 4: Got sixty feet? Oh goodness. Let's see here. M hmm, down,
just moving out, that's right down over here? Is there
like a way up behind the bottom area of the
map that it cuts off or not really?
Speaker 2: M Yeah, cliff goes for a while, like maybe to
keep going, but it'll take a few turns.
Speaker 4: Probably, gotcha. Let's see here ten fifteen twenty four five
fifty fifty five sixty ten fifteen five thirty think ok
five ten fifteen need twenty five thirty thirty five forty
forty five fifty whoa actually fifty there? Double check the
range of spill real fast that I just learned.
Speaker 7: Oh no, con you say, I go here five ten
fifteen twenty twenty five thirty five ten twenty twenty five.
So it was here five ten fifteen twenty twenty five
thirty Okay, probably five ten fifteen for.
Speaker 2: Your calculations as well. Cliff edges are about fifteen feet up.
Speaker 4: Gotcha? How was it really planning on trying to hit
the four on the ground. I'm still gonna used to
how to use the ping tool. Oh is it hold? Yes?
So that one that I just pinged, I have accepted
that I missed that I will not be able to hit.
But these four up, including this one, I'd like to
do rhymes binding ice, which is a thirty foot cone
starting with me and going five to ten, fifteen, twenty
five thirty, which should just hit him barely.
Speaker 2: It will just hit him and just not hit the
other guy. All right, what do they need to do?
Speaker 3: All right?
Speaker 4: For rhymes binding ice? It is a real fast constitution
saving throw. DC will be fourteen DC will be fourteen.
Speaker 2: Huh, all right, we're gonna start off with look at
this out of my face. The guy in the back said,
dexterity or constitution constitution? Okay, sorry, this is walking out
on me.
Speaker 4: I went on promin. It's also four separate enemies, all right,
what does he need to save? A fourteen?
Speaker 2: Okay, so the one in the back missus. Next, we
will do the well to get this guy to kind
of to the your rightmost is still on the ground.
Another fail and for him it will be another fail.
And this one they all four of them failed their
saving through. So what happens?
Speaker 4: So I don't know if this is a if you
have a there is a condition in that they are
going to be hindered by ice. Intel another creature within
reach of it uses an action to break away the ice.
Until something breaks away the ice. Their speed is reduced
to zero. Also, they take three D eight cold damage
and I will roll that real fast. Okay. They take
thirteen points of cold damage and all four of them
are hindered by ice until another creature uses their action
to physically break away the ice that is hindering them.
And while they are hindered, their speed is zero. Okay, yeah,
that hurt all of us. You know this Fellscher, go
why are you making me do this? You had so
much to live for? And that will be Belcher's or
was torn. Actually he will pry and like get with
his last remaining bit of movement speed like right up
against the cliff edge to hopefully make it so that
these two Archers might have a harder time aiming at him. Okay,
that will be Belcher, soorce toy.
Speaker 2: Okay, so what happened with these guys again?
Speaker 3: He said?
Speaker 4: There? They can't move, Yes, their speed is zero until
another creature comes and breaks them out of the ice
using an action. Okay, wow.
Speaker 2: Wow, So up next is going to be the bandits,
I believe, How do how do they follow that? So
these four are stuck. This one in the back is
going to come up here, and yeah he's gonna pull
out his long bow. I guess is he's gonna take
a shot at you beldisor only cal standable?
Speaker 4: Where is that?
Speaker 3: So?
Speaker 2: I don't know why this is being such a pain
on me right now. Okay, whatever where do those guys
come from? Don't don't ignore them? That dam has been weird. Okay,
all right? A one is that gonna be? I assume
a nine does not hit?
Speaker 4: A nine does miss?
Speaker 2: Belch resor Okay, one of the guys you froze, the
one who was speaking, did also have a long bow,
so he will also take a shot at you.
Speaker 4: Does a fifteen hit fifteen also misses?
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness, Belchersor you are a problem.
Speaker 4: That's why I know the care sho to be.
Speaker 3: And both.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that was terrifying what you did. So these the
two archers on the other side of the road are
definitely gonna make pot shots at you the best they can. Uh,
an eight is gonna miss and a ten is gonna miss.
So how I imagine this is Belcherzor after doing so?
It is kind of wildly riding around on this horse
as he's been shot from every direction. And the two
that are on the cliff face next to you, they
can't really see you where you are, get a good shot.
So they're both gonna shoot at the second scariest thing,
Sir Hogan, that's a long shot.
Speaker 3: Fourteen does not hit. It's an armor class.
Speaker 4: Right and this yeah seven?
Speaker 3: Huh that does not hit.
Speaker 2: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: These poor fellas are missing every single one of their shots.
They are probably regretting not running away right now, up
next handlick.
Speaker 1: All right, all right, already, So how far is my
movement speed? I believe I've got thirty or thirty five?
Speaker 2: Yes, but you are mounted on a horse and you unmounted?
Is I believe half your movement speed?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 4: No, okay, I'm gonna but also just attack from horseback.
Speaker 2: No no, no, no, but you are, but he's not
at the helm of the horse.
Speaker 1: Oh okay. So what I'm gonna do is I'm going
to step off and ryan.
Speaker 3: Ten.
Speaker 1: Fifteen. I'm gonna run up straight fifteen Okay, right here,
I want to That's where I want to be. I
just don't know how to move it.
Speaker 2: Wait, that's you can just drag and drop your character.
Speaker 1: Oh I can. Oh okay, yeah, I want to go there.
Speaker 3: All right.
Speaker 1: So I'm gonna go fifteen right there, and I am
going to You're not gonna believe this. I'm gonna cast firebolt. Wait, yeah, yeah,
fire bolt actually right, actually hold on, sorry, sorry I misspoke.
I want to do yeah, I want to do firebolt.
I'm just gonna do fire bolt.
Speaker 2: Okay, Okay, who are you gonna shoot at?
Speaker 1: Is there gonna be any Is it gonna be hard
to shoot at that like the person on top of
the cliff looking down at Belthazar.
Speaker 2: No, honestly, they're not covered very well. So okay, the
only guy who you can't really see very well is
this one all the way back.
Speaker 1: Here sorees behind the cliff.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 1: Okay, So what I'm gonna do is aim for the
guy that's the most clear shot to me and that
has the most danger of hitting Balthazar. Okay, I'm gonna
him with a firebolt. Just do I just roll firebolt?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Go well, go ahead and roll to hit. Yes, A
sixteen is going to hit. Yes, go ahead and roll
the damage.
Speaker 3: Okay, go there, let's go.
Speaker 1: Where do I roll damage?
Speaker 3: Ad?
Speaker 1: Got I forgot how to do that?
Speaker 2: Far It should be right next to your firebolt.
Speaker 1: Let me try it again. I don't I don't have
one that shows that.
Speaker 2: Let me pull up your character feet it'll be on
your core. Okay, see about taxi podcasting the one D
ten fire. You'll click on that.
Speaker 1: Okay. I got a five.
Speaker 2: Okay, five damage?
Speaker 4: Okay, all right, anything else?
Speaker 1: I don't think I can do anything else at the moment,
I don't believe.
Speaker 2: Okay, up next, Sarah Hogan, yep, okay, So I have
the horse right, I'm on the horse, yes, okay.
Speaker 3: How much movement is that? Sixty feet? Sixty feet? Is that? Okay?
I'm going to see me measure out real quick. Okay,
that's sixty all right, So I want to charge on
my horse select and move sixty feet here. And as
I kind of ride my bath, Sar, he's getting shot
out with the airs.
Speaker 8: I'm like, they're just great horsework, old man, what's to
live for?
Speaker 3: And this whole time, I'm just kind of revving my
hammer back and I'm just gonna unload it on this, uh,
this guy right above me.
Speaker 2: Okay, but the guy who has not been the guys frozen.
Yeah yeah, okay, all right, my mall, you did run
by this guy, so he will get attack of opportunity
on you. That's fine, U and eleven is going to
miss as well, so that the guy you ran by
is going to take a swing. There we go. A
MODN twenty is gonna hit with a scimitar. Then he
is going to deal.
Speaker 4: A hole whopping two damage.
Speaker 3: Just to brush off.
Speaker 2: Yeah, okay, so you did miss your mall attack on
the guy. He kind of him not being frozen, does
kind of duck out of the way of your swinging mall.
Speaker 3: Okay, and then how do you where is the health
bar at I lost it? Uh?
Speaker 2: You should be able to click on your character and
you'll see the thirty eight.
Speaker 3: Oh there we go. Yeah, there we go.
Speaker 2: Seven you took two damage because it's what was one?
Speaker 3: Yeah? Okay, okay, thirty six. There we go. And then
as a bonus action, I would like to do my
channel divinity with a fearless athlete, which will give me
a I can lift twice so much away blah blah blah,
and uh, the distance of my long and high jumps
are increased by ten feet and it'll cost movement as normal.
So and that would be the end of my turn.
Speaker 2: Right up next is Larry. Let me have a look
at Larry's character sheet real quick. What is Larry gonna do.
How far away is Larry from anybody? Pretty far? So
Larry's just gonna move up thirty feet.
Speaker 3: Is Larry on a horse? No, okay, And.
Speaker 2: Larry's gonna shoot at this bandit right above you Beltrazor
with the light crossbow. Yeah, that's that's that's what's Larry.
That is what Larry I think would do in this situation.
And if you disagree, be quiet. A twelve which is
a going to hit a whole four damage. God dang,
Beltrazor took up all the damage.
Speaker 4: I guess.
Speaker 2: That is going to go ahead and end Larry's turn
up next Beltrizor.
Speaker 3: Belchers or Will.
Speaker 4: Hucher'll just independance for the terrible things he's done. He
will cast bless on everyone else in the party besides himself.
So because everyone is within thirty feet of him.
Speaker 2: Yep, they are so bless everybody on your character cheek.
Since we haven't, I don't think we've done this before.
I should already have it put up for you, but
I'll on Hamlick does not have it, so we will
do with that later. Hamlick. Whenever you make an attack
or saving through, you can add one d fourth to
it perfect.
Speaker 4: Sir Hogan, do you have it on there?
Speaker 2: Yes, So on your thing you'll just turn on the
bless on your save modify, and underneath your attack that'll
automatally roll it for you. All right, anything else Beltrisor.
Speaker 4: I think that will do it for a good old Beltrazor.
He likes where he's at, so he's going to Yeah,
he's gonna stay here.
Speaker 2: Okay, that end your turn up. Next is going to
beat the bandits once again. So what's gonna happen is
these two or in ext to Sir Hogan, are both
gonna pull out their scimitars and make a swing. Let's
see how they fare a twenty two to hit?
Speaker 4: Yeah, but what if it wasn't a twenty two? No, okay,
what if instead I use a dal shift and have
him do that again but worse please?
Speaker 6: Okay, I bet the other guy can't do as good
a seven.
Speaker 3: Yeah.
Speaker 2: So as you start to see this bandit start to
make his swing at Sir Hogan, you kinda you have
this kind of short little vision of what almost happened,
and so you kind of tell uh, Sir Hogan to
just move his head slightly to the right, and as
he does, so, it just completely wists his head and
misses entirely. All Right, the next bandit is gonna also
make an attack another twenty two.
Speaker 4: Do you have anything to say about jack shit about us?
Speaker 3: Hogan?
Speaker 2: All right, okay, it'll be six plus one seven damage,
sir Hogan.
Speaker 3: Ow.
Speaker 2: And this guy in the back, he still can't move,
so he will pull out his light crossbow and then
he will shoot at you as well, since no one
else is really in a good view. A nineteen to hit.
Speaker 3: That hits.
Speaker 4: Do damage.
Speaker 2: That's not too bad. Their Hogan's maken worse.
Speaker 4: Yeah, and.
Speaker 2: The two other bandits that are still stuck and cannot
move will pull out they're like crossbows, uh, and they
are going to They're gonna shoot at Beltrazor. Honestly, this
guy is starting to be a bit of a problem
for them. A thirteen to hit miss and a twelve
to hit miss. Well, that one's gonna come above me. Whoops, missed?
Oh that one's gonna come to my right. Nope, not
not this time. This is It's it's so funny because
from everyone's view, this is just a crazy old man
kind of muttering and just barely.
Speaker 4: Moving out of the way.
Speaker 2: He's not necessarily moving fast. He just somehow knows where
to move before he should know where to move. All right,
the other two bandits on the cliff are still going
to shoot at you, belt Resort.
Speaker 4: I expect nothing less a naturally hurt me. Yeah, that
one hits me. Okay, that one got seventeen does miss.
Speaker 2: Seventeen misses.
Speaker 4: My armor class is eighteen. What I said sixteen, but.
Speaker 2: Even still, good lord, old man's tough.
Speaker 4: All right.
Speaker 2: Well, the one is still going to hit you the
natural twenty, so it's going to be eight plus eight
sixteen damage. Oh did so that one gets you like
right like in the collarbone, that cocky, that one hurts.
Speaker 4: Uh?
Speaker 2: These two other bandits bless this guy's oh correct, thank
you for remembering that bless is maintained. I'm gonna go
ahead and have these two bandits back off out of
sight from everybody, so you guys cannot make any more
shots at them unless you move around. And this guy
right above you, belt Resort is going to to at
handlick well actually hold on, yeah, he's gonna shoot at
stir Hogan. I'm assuming a twelve missus. Yes, okay, same
thing with the other other guy A thirteen. I assume
miss is as well. Yes, okay, kind of getting whiff
of the situation. They also begin to back up. This
guy's going to move right here, so you can still
kind of see you go right there, sir Hogan. You
do see the one on the right on your right
kind of coming down from the around the edward clift.
Speaker 1: Uh hamlick here go Okay, I'm gonna run up thirty okay,
fifteen twenty twenty five, thirty. I'm gonna be like right
in front of these guys like the four right, the
frozen ones, the three frozen. Oh yeah, go there. Yeah,
I'll go here. So I'm gonna go here. By the way,
I want to mention, I also have him the chick
in my left arm, like just fine, like I'm just
cradling him mm hmmm. And here I'm going to set
him down, uh press the amulet. Uh. But I'm not
gonna have him attech there. I want to cast thaumaturgy
for the thought of uh for the thaumaturgy saumaturgy correct
to make him look like he's growing up to forty
feet or how yeah, thirty feet, we'll do thirty feet Uh.
In height, thermaturgy makes a minor wonder and you can
make almost tremors on the ground. You create an instantaneous sound. Uh.
I guess I can't make a visual thing, can I.
Speaker 4: That'd be more of an illusion spell.
Speaker 1: Okay, well, then I'm going to uh make use my
voice and make it like really loud on top of
a rumble of thunder come from the chicken's mouth to
try to scare them all the way.
Speaker 2: I'm gonna move you right here, handlick, so you can
have room for hamna.
Speaker 3: Chick.
Speaker 4: I like this. I like this little art. Yes, chicken.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna have the chicken do that, and I'm going
to use the I can make my voice boom up
to three times louder. So I'm gonna make him have
thunder come out of his mouth and be like be gone,
come from the chickens.
Speaker 4: Mouth really loud.
Speaker 1: Is that way I can scare especially the ones under
ice that are right in front of him.
Speaker 4: Roll intimidation with advantage the.
Speaker 2: Lord I got a nineteen nineteen. Yeah, they're scared. Everyone
who can see this immediately, which I guess, so just
these four and the one guy in the.
Speaker 1: Back, Well, what absolutely, question, wouldn't the people on the
cliff be able to see the chickens? Since it's the
ten feet tall, they'd be able to see.
Speaker 2: Like fifteen feet tall. Okay, lets they've backed away from it.
They do not see anybody right.
Speaker 1: Now, did they hear?
Speaker 3: Yes?
Speaker 2: Yes, So all the ones who can see Hamlet chick
I'm just gonna say, they just if they have anything,
they pissed their pants. What in the hell is going on?
And you can kind of tell at least this guy
right here, he's planning to start running. I'm sure the
others would if they could move?
Speaker 1: Can I also say? Can I? We'll say I've got
a minute of talk time. So I also want to
like use the deepest voice the Hamlet can do and
be like, drop your weapons really loud, like in a
deep voice to scare them something. They'll all drop their weapons.
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, uh, we already rolled intimidation for that, so
we will see what happens on their turn, perfect, Sir Hogan,
your go all right?
Speaker 3: So they're also these other people buy me are scared
by this chicken right now? Yes, okay, I can get
a little I'm going to Are they too frightened to
make an opportunity attack.
Speaker 4: Unfortunately, No, that's that's not yeah, okay.
Speaker 3: Okay, okay, I'm going to attack the guy right above
me again with them all.
Speaker 4: Okay, go ahead and roll to attack.
Speaker 3: That's uh eighteen eighteen.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that'll definitely hit roll damage eight eight h you
kind of smack him right like in the the shoulder
blade and like you definitely dislocated his entire left arm.
He howls in pain while still drenched in his pants
for the giant chicken loubing above. Is there anything else,
Sir Hogan's wanting to do right now?
Speaker 3: I see him still on that horse. Uh going to
uh you know what? Nope, I'm good. That's the end
of my turn, all right.
Speaker 2: Uh, Larry is going to come up to right here
and is just gonna shoot at this bandit right here
next to him to chick, keep it nice and simple.
That is going to be a six, well should be
a plus twenty four, but no matter what, that's gonna miss.
So Larry does miss his shot, and we're just gonna
end Larry's turn there, belter zor.
Speaker 8: Oh goodness, hm hmm, Well, a bit of a pickle here,
you also can't really get a good view on any
bandits with this giant chicken in the way.
Speaker 3: Oh h.
Speaker 4: That is true. That which is true is a real shame.
Can how I have to read the wording on something
real fast? Oh yeah? Oh no, okay, so yeah, it
wouldn't take the horse with me, but I'm going to
use my once So can I see like the edge
upper edge of the cliff like here or here?
Speaker 3: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah you can, Yeah, you can go up there.
Speaker 4: Okay, I'm going to use my once per day free
cast of misty step to bonus action, whoop off my
horse up to there? Okay, from being the very human
face touched feet and then ten stop here and then
well actually as I got here, I'm going to do
told the Dead on this guy, which will make him
force a wisdom saving throw DC fourteen.
Speaker 2: Okay, they got nothing for their wisdom.
Speaker 4: A sixteen All right, Well, okay, he's too terrified to
hear the bells of doom. And then he'll go here
and belt will in his turn right here. Okay, Up
next are the bandits. Well, we're gonna start with the
ones right next to Beltrazor. That you kind of one's
gonna move up and they do have you flanked. Oh
I forgot there's flanking this hower go ahead.
Speaker 2: So yeah, they're going to go ahead and both make
attacks with advantage.
Speaker 4: With those or with swords.
Speaker 2: With sword they pull out their semitars. Is that one missus? Yep,
A seventeen with the other missus. Yeah, they still see
you kind of dodging everything, and they take that as
their cue to just run. So you can get an
opportunity attack if you have some sort of melee weapon
on you.
Speaker 4: I might have like a dagger. Let me double check
the equipment that I have. Uh yeah, yea, I have
a white crossbows. Opportunity to attack only melee weapons. Yes
you can. You can punch.
Speaker 3: Oh, let them go.
Speaker 4: They they just serves as they're leaving. All use the
opportunity attack to yell. Find a different profession. You have
so much to live for.
Speaker 2: All right, These two are gonna come around this way. Uh,
they didn't see what happened, honestly, they might not even
see the chicken from where they are. They just hear
a bunch of yelling and they're both gonna pot shot
at Sir Hogan from Afar.
Speaker 3: Let him try a fifteen if it tires, Does it hit?
Speaker 2: Yes, it hit okay, And the other one's gonna be
a twelve. Yeah, so the first one he's gonna deal
six damage on you. They're both gonna kind of move
back a little bit as well. These guys are stuck
while they are terrified.
Speaker 4: Well, let me check.
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, they're gonna there's.
Speaker 3: Try it. Mm hmm.
Speaker 2: I'd tryd decide what these guysoul do. The ones who
are stuck are still gonna fight because they cannot go
anywhere that that feels like they're only option right now.
I will go ahead and give them the frightened condition
on ham nisch so they have they cannot willingly move
move towards it, and I believe they are now going
to have disadvantage on all attacks. Uh is it is
within their visual size, That's what I thought. On everybody
while it's still within their sight. This guy over here
is still going to shoot at Sir Hogan. He's the
only one that he sees right now. Doesn't matter. Oh well, yeah,
A five is not going to hit. This one right
next to you is going to make his attack. A
thirteen does not hit. These other two are actually gonna
pull out their scimitars, and they're going to make swipes at.
Speaker 4: Him to chick, No, don't.
Speaker 2: An eight well miss and a nine will misses. So
you're just kind of swinging wildly. This guy is gonna run, Honestly,
the one who has is not stuck. He is going
to start bolting.
Speaker 3: Broken shoulder. Yeah, I want to make an opportunity. I
want to finish him off.
Speaker 2: Absolutely do I just rolls normal attack okay, all right,
A fifteen is going to hit go and roll damage.
Speaker 3: Eleven.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he doesn't even get to step away. He is
the first.
Speaker 4: Casual.
Speaker 2: Yes, I wouldn't say first victim. I think you victimized
most of them belgiers.
Speaker 4: Or they had I didn't have a choice.
Speaker 2: Their ability to even do some some thing. This fight
started and ended with you, Cassiy that first spell, Well,
all right, that will end the beatas turn up next
is gonna be handle it, Okay, I'm just gonna have
Hamdachick also on your turn right now.
Speaker 4: We'll talk about it later, but.
Speaker 2: We're gonna treat him kind of like the uh, the
beast tamer or whatever for the Rangers. So as a
bonus action, you can tell what Hamitchick to do.
Speaker 1: Perfect. Okay, So I'm guessing this is all within a minute,
still correct, So.
Speaker 2: This entire fight is within I think twenty yeah, about
twenty four seconds right now.
Speaker 4: Full round of D and D combat is six seconds.
Speaker 1: Okay. So I am going to walk in between Ham
and the chick, in between each one, and I want
to yell in each of their ears and deafen them
completely and take their weapons.
Speaker 3: Okay.
Speaker 4: Uh so you just kind of walk up to the
yep like not like right here.
Speaker 1: Yeah, I'm not running up to them to scare them.
I literally walk up to them like normal and uh huh,
I yell. I get up to their ear like I'm
gonna whisper something while they're still afraid of Han the chick,
and I want to belt the loudest yell I can
into their ears, like I just clap their ears together
to deafen completely.
Speaker 2: Okay, I will give them all the deafened condition. I
will just do that.
Speaker 3: And I want.
Speaker 2: Moved to try to avoid it or cover their ears
that well, okay.
Speaker 1: And I am going to look at each of them
and be like and just like point at the chicken
behind my shoulder, like you know, white eyes, like pointing
at him and then pointing at them like they're gonna
like He's gonna attack them if they don't give me
their weapons.
Speaker 2: Okay, okay, all right, that can end your turn.
Speaker 1: Do they hand me their weapons?
Speaker 2: They have to wait till their turn to find out.
Speaker 1: M Uh, I want, I want as my bonus action
for hand the chick to look into the sky still
using my thaumaturgy, to do the loudest scream to make,
and also have the ground shake a little bit beneath them,
so like for them to know how loud that scream was.
They just can't hear it.
Speaker 2: Ethnically. This is beyond the effects of thomaturgy to do this.
Many things, well, but this is fun.
Speaker 1: Well it says you can shake the ground.
Speaker 2: He says he can do one of these things.
Speaker 1: Oh oh sorry, sorry, then okay, then I'll just you're fine.
Speaker 4: I love this. This is hilarious. We're doing that.
Speaker 2: The entire ground starts shaking, rocks come off the cliff edge.
If they could they pissed their pants again?
Speaker 1: Can I make sure they like? Can I check the
back of their pants to see if they soiled?
Speaker 2: You can smell it, don't worry, Okay, you know all
right in your return, buddy.
Speaker 1: I'm gonna back up behind him the chick they can't well,
now I'll stay there. Yeah, I'll stay there. That'll end
my turn.
Speaker 2: Okay, all right, sir Hogan. I want to say, belt Rasora,
I do not appreciate you using the cone tool down there.
Speaker 4: I saw that. Listen. I'm just doing some belch is
worth there. Just what you're gonna do anyway, Sir Hogan.
Speaker 3: All right, okay, I'm going to So I saw my horse.
I would like to see three. See that's twenty feet
and I can jump. Okay, I'm gonna ride my horse
up to right wait five chan fifteen right here, and
then I would like to can I use my jump
action to leap at the guy above me, and while
I'm in the air, just like you know, hit him
with a little ground pound with the hammer.
Speaker 2: Oh my goodness, yes, go ahead and roll an athletics
check for me.
Speaker 3: Oh crap, uh oh wait a minute, Wait a minute,
Wait a minute. I did channel Di Venning for a
peerless athlete, so I get a I have advantage on
athletics checks. Beautiful awesome eighteen.
Speaker 2: And absolutely roll your attack with advantage.
Speaker 3: Oh smoke out. Okay, that's a five, or I just
roll it twice.
Speaker 2: Wait, you did the wrong that you did the damage,
rolled the attack.
Speaker 3: Oh my bad, my bad. Twenty three.
Speaker 2: Hey, twenty three is gonna hit. Now, you can go
ahead and roll damage all right?
Speaker 3: All right, So I kind of like jump off my
horse and I want to scream the top ropes and
just wail him for eight eight.
Speaker 2: I So you kind of do this and you flip
around and you slam down right onto him. He almost
dodges out of the way, but you get him right
in the back and he falls prone.
Speaker 3: I can't I can't feel my legs. I can't feel
my legs.
Speaker 2: Sir Hogan, you get an inspiration. Oh you already have
an inspiration die, don't you.
Speaker 3: Oh yes, I forgot about that. I should have used that.
Speaker 4: You can use an inspiration.
Speaker 2: I'll let you use an inspiration dye for free and
see if you can deal a little bit more damage.
Speaker 3: I will do that.
Speaker 2: You won't get any any less than eight. Don't worry.
It's my iteration, all right.
Speaker 3: He is.
Speaker 2: I don't know how he is alive, but he is
in fact. Wait, oh wait, no, I did my math wrong.
I can't. I can't, and he just kind of rolls
unconscious and you kind of have a feeling that he's
not went long for this world.
Speaker 3: Okay, and he's on the ground.
Speaker 4: Yeah.
Speaker 3: Yeah, How much movement was that?
Speaker 2: I that for getting off the horse. I'm just gonna say,
that's half your movement that dismount.
Speaker 3: Okay, I have ten left? Yeah? Can I walk walk
slowly intimidating towards this other archer over here, just staying there.
Speaker 2: His friend's blood splattered all over your face, and honestly
his body is still twitching.
Speaker 3: All right. That can end your turn, buddy, I'm gonna
end it right there.
Speaker 2: All right, Larry I just remembered as a satyr. And
so for his turn, he's gonna use mirthful leap, an
attempt to jump up and scale this wall. M Okay,
that does not help that much. Gets a whole one
extra foot to his jump. Let's see how his athletics check.
Speaker 4: Holds up for him to climb.
Speaker 2: Ah, I'm gonna say Larry like is still trying to
get to the top of the cliff by the end
of his turn.
Speaker 5: Uh.
Speaker 2: Unfortunately, that mirthful leap didn't give hi much more of
a jump, and that was think that an eight is
not that great of an athletics check. He's gonna spend
his entire term climbing to be right here, all right,
belt resor what are you doing to my poor bandits?
Speaker 4: He'll move right here and let's see. He'll take out
this neat little measuring pool he discovered. Helli's rhyme is
bidni kiss again. I'm so sorry you all made a stupidness.
Please please throw it down your weapons and give us
all the gold you have. Oh why are you making
a stud that's a constitution saving for on these three? Okay?
Speaker 2: And eleven a fail a fourteen on this guy.
Speaker 4: The seed just ba oh and oh at the seventeen
that one, I will do a little sneaky. I'll use
the second charge of the of my ability make him reroll.
You're a dirty, dirty band thirteen unfortunately just misses it.
Speaker 2: All okay, So this guy uh saved, So he just
takes half damage correct?
Speaker 3: Right, all right?
Speaker 4: So go ahead and world damage low low rolls eleven
total and then like five or six for.
Speaker 2: Half solidifies this guy in ice, so he is stuck,
but he is still alive.
Speaker 3: Uh.
Speaker 2: And then this guy will take five damage. So the
two archers are still alive. One is stuck. The other guy,
who you already froze earlier, is now completely encased in ice,
and you can just kind of assume he's gone.
Speaker 4: And you can approach them. You could have got any
pick with your life. Why did you choose this? Why
did you attack us? It could have all have been avoided.
People are psychopic. They great lot. You understand I don't
want to do this, but you are making why and
that'll be be turn.
Speaker 1: I imagine he's holding his shoulder like whispering slowly into his.
Speaker 2: Yeah, that is exactly correct.
Speaker 3: Yes, oro man, solid.
Speaker 2: See that are these poor poor bandits. I have never
felt so bad for bandits in my life, these two that.
Oh now does this? Does this archer bandit leave his friend?
Speaker 4: Yeah?
Speaker 2: Yeah, no, he's gonna take the dash action. He's gonna
run sixty feet belchers?
Speaker 4: Or do you want to attack? Opportunity at all? Was
used as attack of opportunity to replace it with a grapple,
A grappling check to see if he gets stop if
I'm escaping? Can you do that for opportunity attack?
Speaker 3: I don't know.
Speaker 4: I wanted to be true, somebody, I can look it up.
What's but let me let me have a look.
Speaker 3: Real quick.
Speaker 2: Reaction, make an attack, you grapple.
Speaker 3: Up.
Speaker 4: Heck, it's a weird in between area. In twenty twenty
four it's codified that in twenty fourteen, it's like could
go both ways.
Speaker 2: I'm pretty sure the attack action does encompass grappling, because
you can orgo what is your attacked to grapple? So
I will say so. He will make you make an
athletics check. He will make an cromatics or you'll make
an acrobatics check to try to break free.
Speaker 4: My minus one. But it would be so funny if
he succeeds. He does beat you with a nine.
Speaker 3: Uh.
Speaker 4: This guy runs bushers wire like reaching out to try
to please. Please, you could have done anything else, please, no, please, And.
Speaker 2: This other man that you had frozen will lift his sword, shaking,
holding it in both hands to.
Speaker 4: Stay away from me. Just let me go with your life.
Speaker 7: You could have done anything else with your life.
Speaker 4: I will, I will, I will just leave me alone.
I'll mean the end of bocher. So that's all he has. Sorry,
was abandoned, starting to go ahead.
Speaker 2: Uh, that's all he's gonna do he can't move this, Uh,
sir Hogan, this guy's next to you. He's gonna also
attempt to flee.
Speaker 3: Uh uh.
Speaker 2: He's knocking to disengage. He is just going to dash
action run. Go ahead and make your oportunity attack, assuming
you want to take it.
Speaker 3: Okay, So can my opportunity tack be a grab?
Speaker 4: You can if you'd like to grapple.
Speaker 3: I'd like to try and grapple him.
Speaker 2: Okay, then, oh no, I can lift twice as much
with my peerless athlete thing too. So well, should I
roll roll in athletics? Check which I think you get
an advantage? And he will roll in acrobatics? And eleven
he begins to run, and you just kind of.
Speaker 4: Been your home.
Speaker 2: You're not going anywhere, brother, So I guess he does
not take his dash action because he didn't get the
opportunity to run, but he will use his action to
attempt to break out of it. So go ahead and
go again. No, and seven does not be to seventeen.
Speaker 3: He is.
Speaker 2: Yeah, you got a hold of this guy for sure.
He is not going anywhere.
Speaker 4: Handlick.
Speaker 2: All three of the bandits who are still cannot move,
They drop their weapons hands up in the air. I'll
like to note this guy right here, who is it
right in the middle, is the one who is speaking originally?
Speaker 1: I well, he can't hear me.
Speaker 2: No, yeah, no, they are all deafened. All right, that's
gonna end the Bandit's turd. They're not doing anything. Handlick.
How do you respond?
Speaker 1: Okay, So I'm gonna keep them in the How long
does this frozen thing last?
Speaker 3: Like? Is it? Oh?
Speaker 4: Literally until somebody else breaks them out of it? So
whichever one come, Yeah, it's a minute or until someone
else breaks them out.
Speaker 1: Okay, okay, okay. I want to grab all their weapons
off the ground and put them on top of hand
the chick sitting there, and then I want to walk
up to each of them individually, one at a time,
and like, really, look like I'm scolding them, but I'm
just talking about my day, but look angry at about it.
Speaker 2: Yeah, as far as they know, you are just scolding them,
and they cannot hear a word you're saying. They're they're
trying to avoid eye contact with you. They're looking at
the ground best.
Speaker 1: They can can. I slightly slap them to get them
to look at me, like not enough to break the ice,
but just to look at me.
Speaker 4: Yeah, yeah, like.
Speaker 1: You know the scene where he's like, I am the captain.
Now I want to do that every time they look away.
Speaker 2: Okay, they're shaking looking at you. If they look away,
you either slap them or you grab them by the
face and look them dead in the eyes.
Speaker 1: And then I grab I get all their attention still
looking at me, and I hand the chick. One more Tom,
and I want hand the chick. It's my bonus action.
Look up in the sky, do the yell one more
Tom and check the ground.
Speaker 4: Okay, yeah, it happens. They are.
Speaker 2: They're just a few steps away from a heart attack
at this point. Anything else him.
Speaker 1: Look, I want to go around one more time and
slap them each and just like give them the no
no finger.
Speaker 2: Yeah, I'll be so honest. Combat is over. They got
nothing else they can really do. They're frozen. I will
pause combat temporarily if so. Anybody can do anything right now,
and we can kind of see where this goes.
Speaker 3: So while I'm grabbing that guy up there, I kind
of like look at him like, oh are you going son?
You need to tag in for your friend over there,
and I want to throw him like ten fifty. However,
I came in the air and have him land right
on his friend.
Speaker 2: Oh no, I go ahead and roll in athletics. Check
to see how far you throw him up eighteen eighteen. Yeah,
you throw him right right over on top of him.
Keep him right here for now, and he's going to
attempt to not take damage. He is going to fail
at not taking damage and he will take six points
of bledging damage as he falls onto his friend who
is still twitching. Who Now, once he falls on him,
his the entire body like convulses like contracts around him.
He begins screaming, I.
Speaker 1: Keep going, you keep going. I got one thing I
want to do after you.
Speaker 3: Look it. Okay, so I guess since he tagged him,
I kind of like grab my hammer. I'm like, all right,
now we can do it. And I want to Uh,
I would like to thunder to smite him or do
I do that after?
Speaker 2: Well, thunder smite you had to expat You have to
cast as a spell and then smite you to clear
after you hit.
Speaker 3: Ok So I cast under a smite. You know, my
ammer starts like glowing purple or something, and then I
will pack with the attack with my mall. Okay.
Speaker 2: At this point he kind of gets gets on his
hands and knees and is begging please please know since
he is on the ground on account as prone, you
get to roll with advantage awesome, Oh a natural twenty
for a total of twenty seven for total thirty. I
might add with the bless awesome. You know what I
should have? Oh my goodness, that is that is rough?
Speaker 3: Okay, use my thunderous spite.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so go ahead and do your roles and then
we will figure out what the max is after that.
Speaker 4: A calculator.
Speaker 3: That's not what I want to do. Oh crap, I
didn't put how much damage it does?
Speaker 4: Now that you know it, knew it. You're a paladin, correct, Yes,
you could also choose to regularly smite on top of that.
Speaker 2: Oh, I assume you are doing so correct?
Speaker 5: Well?
Speaker 4: Why not?
Speaker 3: Yeah, that's why I assume what is a Okay, thunder
is an extra two D six. But okay, and if
he loses the strength saving through you can be pushed
ten feet away.
Speaker 4: It's not gonna be you know, don't worry.
Speaker 3: That does not matter.
Speaker 2: Roll your normal damage okay.
Speaker 3: Eight? Eight?
Speaker 2: Okay, then SI what is what does your smite do?
Speaker 3: Is it?
Speaker 4: Two D eight right now? Yeah? Two D eight two
D eight yeah for a first le well spell slot, yes, yep.
Speaker 2: Okay, So so extually is another sixteen on the max.
Speaker 3: That's a six and two.
Speaker 2: That's eight more six plus two plus eight. Now roll
the two D six for the thunder damage for me
three in a one plus three plus one. So as
you lay us the hammer down, he is begging, pleading.
Just a smile creeps along your face as you smash
through him, dealing sixty damage on this poor guy who
had I want to say, nine health left. There is
nothing left between the radiant energy of the smike and
the thunderous aspect of it. There was a pile of
goo for a second, but the thunder just kind of
turns it all into ash. Okay, that guy is gone
from all planes of existence.
Speaker 3: Okay, I guess I kind of have some movement left.
I'd like to move every.
Speaker 4: We're not doing burns right now, so he can kind
of stay.
Speaker 3: Okay, Can I get back on my horse and uh
ride right on top of the cliff edge of the
cliff definite the glive? All right?
Speaker 2: Yeah, you kind of go around and go to the
cliff edge with your hammer like on your shoulders, kind
of looking off before we get to handle it, beltrazor,
what do you do with your guy? And there's still
the one other guy who's is this.
Speaker 4: An accurate distance away from me?
Speaker 3: Yes?
Speaker 4: Okay, sixty feet away.
Speaker 2: From sixty five feet from you? Because he was right here.
Speaker 4: Okay, so yeah, upon that belt go here here, So
he's fifty at this point away from me. Now whisper
into this one too. Your repentance has been accepted. If
only your friend was so wise, he'll actually I'm fifty,
I have another twenty movement left.
Speaker 3: M hmm.
Speaker 4: I'd like to get within thirty feet of him, and
it's good another rhymes finding ice.
Speaker 2: You know what, I will allow it. I think technically
you should still be five feet out, but.
Speaker 4: Oh, because he was here, so he's sixty from this point.
That's fair.
Speaker 2: It will just move within distance. I'm not going to
fight you, fight you on it.
Speaker 3: Well, so I was.
Speaker 4: I wanted to be accurate because you know, I can
just go with the other one and I'll just do
told the dead else.
Speaker 2: He's within Okay, Actually I like that one better. Okay,
so he rolls a wisdom Wisdom DC fourteen, No.
Speaker 4: Thirteen.
Speaker 2: Does he get anything to add to it?
Speaker 4: No? Thirteen? He barely fails. He only takes three points
of damage. I'm fortunately alive. We'll sure continue moving forward
at a rate of thirty feet and if he's leaving
at sixty five around, I think Bels will be able
to get four firebolts before he gets out of range.
So this guy will just see belichere calmly walking forward
constantly as he's running for his life, just firing firebolts
at his friend as he's fleeing. Okay, whould have surrendered?
Speaker 3: Why are you making me two of this? Okay?
Speaker 2: I will say, as this is as you're doing. So
he is running with amongst the trees, so okay, he
will get three quarters covered between all of them. If
you're shooting fire bolts.
Speaker 4: At him, I'll do two. How many fire bolts will
I get with three or four at the.
Speaker 2: Let's just say three. I don't want to do the
math right now, all right.
Speaker 4: The first two will be firebolts, the last one will
be magic missiles.
Speaker 2: If it gets to that, Oh that's how what's magic
missile range?
Speaker 4: One and twenty? That is discussing. Okay, so real fast
for the the firebolt characters. She then the cano vive
the magic missiles whenever you get to it. Okay, well
we'll see if I even need them. Here IM real
fast firebolt.
Speaker 2: An eleven misses, eleven misses.
Speaker 4: The second one.
Speaker 2: Twenty three will get him. Go ahead and roll damage.
Speaker 4: Nine points of fire damage.
Speaker 2: As he's running and you're kind of just kind of
casually walking behind him, you get one just right. Wait,
it's three quarters cover. Actually I forgot to say it
that I forgot about that. No, it doesn't matter. You
got twenty three. A plus five will not do that
for him, So yeah.
Speaker 4: You kind of get it.
Speaker 2: He goes off for a distance, You kind of aim
where you know where he is about to turn, and
you get him and he just kind of bursts into
flames and falls over. So you were watching walking thirty
feet every time?
Speaker 3: Right?
Speaker 2: Yes, So that was their third time, so that it
would be one second because that was my second fire bolt. Uh,
because the first one was a raw miss and that's.
Speaker 4: The second one, isn't it. So that'd be sixty feet
out all right, dashing back and the last thing before
Belchore ends this little aside whispering to this poor fellow
who's still frozen. He goes, you all could have survived this.
It didn't have to be this way. I'm gonna go
see if if they people up there need help, don't
go anywhere. Okay, gotten pray, pick a cotten pray, and
that will be Belcher's are.
Speaker 2: Surn Okay, So about this time, as you turn around,
you see Sir Hogan go up onto the cliff edge,
and before other that happens. Handlick, what's going on with
your your motley crew?
Speaker 3: Uh?
Speaker 1: I'm going to use my Wait, how much of them
are covered in ice? Or is it just like they're frozen.
Speaker 2: They they can't move from the ice. It's they're not
like frozen over, but they cannot move and they are
all on death store.
Speaker 1: Okay, what kind of armor do they have on?
Speaker 4: Ges?
Speaker 2: Leather okay, kind of scrapped together leather armor.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm we use my dagger and cut off all
their clothes. Okay, I'm gonna take all their clothes and
also put that onto ham in the chick so that
way they I'm not even gonna leave any undergarments on either.
They're getting it all taken, it's all gone.
Speaker 4: Okay, which gay do you start with?
Speaker 3: Uh?
Speaker 1: The guy in the middle that way? The two other two,
since they're permanently deaf, I just want them to look
at me while I do it and point at them
that they're next.
Speaker 4: Okay, I will say.
Speaker 2: By the time you get the first one done, the
other two their spell ends and they run. This guy's
gonna run here. Do you make any opportunity attacks? You
let them go?
Speaker 1: Does ham to chicks my bonus? Like, I can use
hand the chick as my opportunity.
Speaker 4: Attack, Yes, you can.
Speaker 1: I'm going to use hand the chick. Do they run
at the same time or can I take opportunity tacks.
Speaker 2: On the sea begin to run at the same time.
Speaker 1: But I can take opportunity at tacks on both.
Speaker 2: You can get one hand to chick, can get one.
Speaker 1: Okay, I'm going to use my dagger on the one
to my that'll be on my left. I'm like, go
go for his throat, and then the one that's running
past hand the chick, I'm gonna have hand the chick
lean over and just do one of his death pounds
with his beak.
Speaker 2: Hey, okay, So God and roll to attack with your dagger.
Speaker 1: Alrighty got a twenty four.
Speaker 2: A natural twenty for twenty four he had two health left. Yeah,
you get him, you you get him right in the throat.
Speaker 4: He doesn't.
Speaker 2: It's all like he doesn't notice at first, but he
kind of just keeps running and he kind of drops
to his knees, gargling and falls over. Hamnichick is going
to also get a natural twenty? Does hand a chick?
Peck or scratch?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 1: Wait, which one does more?
Speaker 2: Like?
Speaker 1: I think it's the peck does more because he like
uses all his.
Speaker 4: Fourck would do more.
Speaker 1: Yes, yeah, I was gonna say I wanted to see
him take him down with the peck.
Speaker 4: Okay.
Speaker 2: As he starts to run, Hamnita Chick just kind of
boo right on the top of his head and he
just kind of crumples. As you can see the top
of his head is completely carved in Belcher's are This
is what you see as you begin to walk back
and Sir Hogans go to the cliff edge. The final
bandit who you had cut the clothes off, is now
going to try to run past the both of you.
He climbs onto the horse that was left there by beltrazor,
Waite goes white.
Speaker 1: Wait wait wait wait wait Waite Waite sence he went
past me after the other two. Do I get another
opportunity attack since he ran after them?
Speaker 3: Oh?
Speaker 2: This is would be the same turn.
Speaker 4: Bang the horses right here?
Speaker 3: Hold up a second.
Speaker 2: He is now very far away, Sir Hogan. He is
seventy five from you, fifty five from Larry.
Speaker 1: How far is he from me?
Speaker 2: Seventy?
Speaker 3: Okay?
Speaker 1: Okay, So can I go ahead and do something here
for sure? Okay? What I want to do.
Speaker 2: Is do.
Speaker 1: Firebolt okay, and try to hit him from there?
Speaker 2: Okay, roll to attack, my god, yeah, you hit him
and roll damage, roll damage?
Speaker 1: All right, let me go here, I've rolled.
Speaker 4: One, please mate.
Speaker 2: Yeah, he goes flying off of the horse.
Speaker 3: And where does where does he land at?
Speaker 2: Like like here against this tree?
Speaker 3: Okay?
Speaker 1: Is he still breathing enough for us to go to
him and like talk to him away?
Speaker 2: Was if you missed that that he would have gotten
to dash on the horse and go one twenty every round?
Good belchersor that's at this time you kind of reach
over here.
Speaker 4: Just seeing all this, pulchers or quickly ask will be
one to interrogate anyone.
Speaker 1: No, No, one's left.
Speaker 4: Okay one second guy, so belchi or go back here.
He'll please give me your one. It's please right now,
please just give me one.
Speaker 2: Belt resor As you turn around, he has already like
his their thing ended in the middle of your walk back.
So at this point he's already two dashes away. So
he is one hundred and twenty feet away from where
he was.
Speaker 4: So if I get five, ten, fifteen, twenty here exactly, yes.
Speaker 1: Do it?
Speaker 4: Did you have to run?
Speaker 1: Wait?
Speaker 4: No?
Speaker 1: Yeah, at at one hundred and twenty could you not
still do firebolt?
Speaker 5: Oh?
Speaker 4: I can do something better than that. I can do
magic missile. Why did you have to run? As he
draws arcane, runs up in the air, gingerly signing each one,
and releases them.
Speaker 2: Okay, roll the roll the damage. It's tonically possible.
Speaker 4: So it's h e four plus one five plus two
plus two. Uh so nine? Uh yeah?
Speaker 7: No he yeah, body goes slind and flying.
Speaker 2: You don't really see where it went. It looks like
it kind of went down some bushes.
Speaker 4: He had so much to live for, and at this
point bush Or kind of as his pennance, gather up
the weapons and whatnot of everyone and take them to
the group of everyone that's near him, at least kind
of getting them a quick burial, right, like pushing a bit,
a little bit of soil onto their their decomposing bodies,
as he takes the weapons and does a you know,
a prayer for each of them.
Speaker 2: All right in the wake at this massacre, you all
stand triumphant with honestly very little damage done. You gather
the weapons, do you gather the bodies at all? You
kind of leave them as is.
Speaker 1: I want to go to each of them and do
the like tea bag thing.
Speaker 4: Okay, yeah, you do. So as he does that, he'll
belshe or fallow behind and take the weapons and give
them a quick prayer and burial.
Speaker 1: Right. Oh, they're all on top of him. The chick
by the way, just to it's like the ones around me.
I took all of them.
Speaker 4: I'll put the weapons that I found on ham and
a chick also, if that's okay with you having the.
Speaker 1: Lick, that's all right, Yeah.
Speaker 2: Will go retrieve the horse and bring it back.
Speaker 3: That's smart, thank you, Larry. Since I'm a dwarf and
I'm a little smaller, I want to stand up on
my horse that I'm on right now, kind of like
put some boot style and be like, this is what
happens when you mess with Sir Hogan and his motley crew.
Raise used the mug up a right, chugging as you do.
Speaker 2: Said, this is a perfect beautiful shot of this motley crew.
Weapons gathered on the back of ham Hamna chick. I'd say, Papa,
by the time you collect everything and get your bearings
and you can make your way hand a chick does
revert back to normal size weapons. All fall didn't think
that one through, okay, and that is where we will
end for tonight.
Speaker 4: All gather the weapons, put them on my horse.