WEBVTT 1 00:00:06.559 --> 00:00:25.719 And what's up. Guys. 2 00:00:25.879 --> 00:00:30.960 Welcome to a special bonus episode of Dinner with the Healers. 3 00:00:31.440 --> 00:00:33.479 My name is Eric and if this is your first 4 00:00:33.479 --> 00:00:36.640 time listening to us, we are normally an episode by 5 00:00:36.719 --> 00:00:40.079 episode Blue podcast, where we watch an episode of Blue 6 00:00:40.119 --> 00:00:43.039 and then talk about it and the lessons we learned. 7 00:00:43.719 --> 00:00:47.840 In this special bonus episode, I sat down and talked 8 00:00:47.880 --> 00:00:52.640 with Christopher Menino, the author of Making It Up, a 9 00:00:52.799 --> 00:00:55.079 Revolutionary way to bond. 10 00:00:54.759 --> 00:00:56.000 With kids through Play. 11 00:00:56.799 --> 00:01:00.439 We had a really fun time talking about a book 12 00:01:00.799 --> 00:01:03.719 and the ideas behind it and how it relates to Blue, 13 00:01:04.319 --> 00:01:07.079 and I think that you guys are really going. 14 00:01:06.840 --> 00:01:07.599 To enjoy it. 15 00:01:08.400 --> 00:01:11.000 Christopher, thank you so much for being here today. We're 16 00:01:11.040 --> 00:01:11.920 glad to have you. 17 00:01:12.560 --> 00:01:15.000 Thanks so much for having me tell us a little 18 00:01:15.040 --> 00:01:19.840 bit about your book. So Making It Up. This is 19 00:01:19.920 --> 00:01:23.719 a book and a course. They're both out there now, 20 00:01:24.200 --> 00:01:27.319 and the reason I'm on this podcast right now is 21 00:01:27.319 --> 00:01:30.159 because they are a direct response to Blue. About three 22 00:01:30.239 --> 00:01:33.000 years ago, there was a woman who made all of 23 00:01:33.040 --> 00:01:35.560 the Blue fangroups go mad. I was in more than 24 00:01:35.599 --> 00:01:39.519 one of them, and this woman, stay at home mom, 25 00:01:40.599 --> 00:01:44.120 went onto a magazine and was basically saying that she 26 00:01:44.200 --> 00:01:49.359 hated Blue. Because all of a sudden her kids had 27 00:01:49.680 --> 00:01:54.400 unrealistic expectations about parenting. That was kind of the title 28 00:01:54.439 --> 00:01:58.480 of her article, that the healers made parenting unrealistic. And 29 00:01:58.519 --> 00:02:00.799 so I was kind of joking about this with my wife. 30 00:02:01.439 --> 00:02:04.000 We were just laughing, and my wife just looks at 31 00:02:04.040 --> 00:02:07.159 me very you know, my wife is very very I'm, 32 00:02:08.240 --> 00:02:11.159 you know, kind of straightforward at times, wonderful person. But 33 00:02:11.240 --> 00:02:12.919 my wife, Rachel, she looks at me. She's just like, well, 34 00:02:12.960 --> 00:02:16.759 you're a writer, and you know what's going on. You 35 00:02:16.879 --> 00:02:19.560 know that there's a lot of improv here. Joe Brumm 36 00:02:19.599 --> 00:02:22.120 and the team are creating these based on all these 37 00:02:22.120 --> 00:02:25.199 theater skills that are what you parent like, but most 38 00:02:25.199 --> 00:02:29.439 people don't. You're a writer, write a book. That's literally 39 00:02:29.479 --> 00:02:32.479 what she said to me, And so that's how the 40 00:02:32.520 --> 00:02:36.599 book starts. It starts as a response to this angry 41 00:02:36.680 --> 00:02:40.520 woman is like, this is impossible, and my wife is like, well, 42 00:02:40.599 --> 00:02:44.639 no it's not. And the truth is is very bluey adjacent. 43 00:02:44.800 --> 00:02:47.639 It's perfect for those fans. And the other thing that 44 00:02:47.800 --> 00:02:50.719 really kind of inspired my method I realized as I 45 00:02:50.759 --> 00:02:55.199 was digging into the editing and the writing of it 46 00:02:55.240 --> 00:02:57.319 is I realized a lot of my parenting sort of 47 00:02:57.319 --> 00:03:00.840 took shape in the pandemic actually, because all of a 48 00:03:00.840 --> 00:03:03.400 sudden kids were at home. You know, you can't do anything. 49 00:03:03.439 --> 00:03:07.960 The world is closed. We all remember that. Yes, fun 50 00:03:08.159 --> 00:03:12.159 times with fun in quotes. And my background was in 51 00:03:12.240 --> 00:03:15.360 theater too. This is me. I was a theater teacher 52 00:03:15.439 --> 00:03:18.599 as a theater coach, and so I was doing all 53 00:03:18.639 --> 00:03:20.719 this theater stuff with my kids. I was using all 54 00:03:20.719 --> 00:03:26.199 these theater techniques on myself and it was like, wow, 55 00:03:26.240 --> 00:03:29.840 this kind of method was born. That yeah, pass forward 56 00:03:29.919 --> 00:03:33.439 to today and that's where making it up really evolves. 57 00:03:34.439 --> 00:03:37.280 That's interesting that you say that, because I remember very 58 00:03:37.319 --> 00:03:41.159 specifically when that rant hit the internet and in the 59 00:03:41.199 --> 00:03:47.039 Bluey fandom the ripples through it, and I questioned myself, said, 60 00:03:47.120 --> 00:03:50.199 I feel like I parent quite a bit like Bandit. 61 00:03:50.360 --> 00:03:53.000 One of the things we joke about on dinner with 62 00:03:53.039 --> 00:03:56.039 the Healers is that he and I could be brothers 63 00:03:56.639 --> 00:04:01.479 because we're very similar with slowing things down and really 64 00:04:01.479 --> 00:04:03.879 listening to what the kids have to say and that 65 00:04:04.080 --> 00:04:07.840 sort of thing. And I was shocked at this person's 66 00:04:08.680 --> 00:04:12.560 revelation about it. But interestingly, when I talked to my dad, 67 00:04:13.120 --> 00:04:16.399 he was watching it with his wife's grandkids, and he's like, 68 00:04:17.240 --> 00:04:19.480 that's show Blewie boy. Those kids think they can get 69 00:04:19.480 --> 00:04:21.720 away with anything now. And I said, well, I guess 70 00:04:21.800 --> 00:04:24.759 maybe that's like a certain slice of life that maybe 71 00:04:24.839 --> 00:04:28.199 does view it like that. So that was interesting to me. 72 00:04:28.839 --> 00:04:33.439 But COVID is something that really forced a lot of 73 00:04:33.519 --> 00:04:36.240 changes in people and a lot of introspection. So it's 74 00:04:36.319 --> 00:04:38.920 interesting how that came about for you. Tell us about 75 00:04:38.920 --> 00:04:39.959 your theater background. 76 00:04:41.240 --> 00:04:45.199 Sure, I mean, my degree is in theater education. I'm 77 00:04:45.480 --> 00:04:49.600 for about twenty years I was involved directly in theater. 78 00:04:49.680 --> 00:04:52.839 I'm actually just getting back into it. I just had 79 00:04:52.920 --> 00:04:57.439 a callback audition this Week's my first audition on this 80 00:04:57.560 --> 00:05:00.839 side of the stage in a long time since having kids. 81 00:05:01.879 --> 00:05:04.000 But I've been the director of the playwright and the 82 00:05:04.000 --> 00:05:08.040 theater teacher. Mostly the teacher I taught young kids. I'm 83 00:05:08.160 --> 00:05:10.000 for a couple of years, and I taught young kids 84 00:05:10.000 --> 00:05:12.439 in the summers. I kept going this is mostly in 85 00:05:12.480 --> 00:05:15.920 the Washington, DC area, and then I was running a 86 00:05:15.959 --> 00:05:19.199 wonderful high school theater program, like sort of my dream job. 87 00:05:20.000 --> 00:05:23.920 I six classes a theater. I'm over four levels. We 88 00:05:23.959 --> 00:05:25.920 did a lot of shows. We had a separate improfitruy, 89 00:05:25.959 --> 00:05:30.560 but really a dream program. The downside was when we 90 00:05:30.639 --> 00:05:35.199 had my son on nine years ago. You know, he 91 00:05:35.279 --> 00:05:38.839 was in daycare and I was working twelve hours a day, 92 00:05:39.759 --> 00:05:41.879 five sometimes six days a week. I was always the 93 00:05:41.920 --> 00:05:44.399 first one to school, the last one to leave, and 94 00:05:44.439 --> 00:05:47.199 I was making half of what my wife was making. 95 00:05:47.759 --> 00:05:49.040 So we had a. 96 00:05:49.000 --> 00:05:51.279 Long talk and we you know, I became a stay 97 00:05:51.279 --> 00:05:53.680 at home dad after that, and I it was one 98 00:05:53.680 --> 00:05:57.040 of the best decisions I ever made. So my background 99 00:05:57.120 --> 00:05:59.680 was in teaching and in theater and that all pivoted 100 00:05:59.720 --> 00:06:03.199 with my my son. And then you know, you talk 101 00:06:03.240 --> 00:06:06.360 about the where does this method come from? Like I 102 00:06:06.360 --> 00:06:10.079 didn't really realize it until the pandemic a few years later, 103 00:06:10.120 --> 00:06:14.360 but suddenly I'm drawing on that theater experience. I'm drawing 104 00:06:14.480 --> 00:06:18.439 on like how can I not feel so isolated? And 105 00:06:18.480 --> 00:06:21.240 as a dad especially I'm not sure where you are, 106 00:06:21.279 --> 00:06:25.000 but where I was in Maryland, Man, every library group, 107 00:06:25.040 --> 00:06:27.920 every playground, there was one dad and it was me 108 00:06:28.839 --> 00:06:31.040 and all the other kids are there with their moms. 109 00:06:31.839 --> 00:06:35.160 And it feels, you know, a little weird. It can be, 110 00:06:35.199 --> 00:06:37.759 and you know, and I had trouble, like, you know, 111 00:06:37.800 --> 00:06:39.480 I wanted to talk to them, but I don't want 112 00:06:39.480 --> 00:06:41.160 them to be scared of me because I I'm male, 113 00:06:41.319 --> 00:06:43.800 and you know, it's it's all those dynamics rolled up 114 00:06:43.800 --> 00:06:47.240 in the one and then the pandemic comes crashing down. 115 00:06:47.680 --> 00:06:50.560 It's like, oh God, what do we do? And so 116 00:06:50.759 --> 00:06:54.279 for me, what I ended up digging into was in 117 00:06:54.480 --> 00:06:57.399 theater method acting, what most people are familiar with, that 118 00:06:58.160 --> 00:07:02.879 is all about using memories to create emotion. You did 119 00:07:02.879 --> 00:07:05.759 this on stage. This is how any screen or stage 120 00:07:05.759 --> 00:07:10.759 actor does it. And I realized I was actually doing 121 00:07:10.839 --> 00:07:14.040 that just to make it through the day, just to 122 00:07:14.120 --> 00:07:17.279 go to these playdates, just to connect with my kids. 123 00:07:17.319 --> 00:07:19.319 And so when I came to editing the book and stuff, 124 00:07:19.360 --> 00:07:21.680 I was like, wait a sec, I got to talk 125 00:07:21.720 --> 00:07:23.959 about that too, because Bluie is great and it's all 126 00:07:24.000 --> 00:07:26.560 improv and fun. That was sort of the first half 127 00:07:26.600 --> 00:07:29.319 of the book. But there's also this other half where 128 00:07:29.319 --> 00:07:32.240 it's like, I want to talk about using memories. So 129 00:07:32.279 --> 00:07:36.040 I call that the anchor technique, and that's what that is. 130 00:07:36.079 --> 00:07:42.360 It's using kind of method acting style memories, these recent 131 00:07:42.439 --> 00:07:45.720 memories to get you through tough moments. Actually, I'm going 132 00:07:45.759 --> 00:07:48.120 to give you an example because that ties perfectly into example, 133 00:07:48.480 --> 00:07:52.759 right before this interview, my son added tantrum and I 134 00:07:52.800 --> 00:07:55.160 don't even remember what it was about. I was about nothing. 135 00:07:55.800 --> 00:08:00.959 It's like pustantrums are right, and in if you know, 136 00:08:01.040 --> 00:08:03.120 rewind a few years, I would get to the point 137 00:08:03.160 --> 00:08:05.959 where things like that would fluster me, or or the 138 00:08:06.040 --> 00:08:08.000 library times and I'm the one Dad would fluster me. 139 00:08:08.079 --> 00:08:10.199 And now it's like I don't even now, I'm the 140 00:08:10.240 --> 00:08:12.600 bandit or chili now. And how do they get to 141 00:08:12.639 --> 00:08:14.560 that level? How do they get to that level where 142 00:08:14.560 --> 00:08:17.079 they're dancing in the street and they're not even faced? 143 00:08:17.399 --> 00:08:21.000 And for me, what works is this anchor technique. I 144 00:08:21.079 --> 00:08:25.759 instantly think of something recent, less than a month ago 145 00:08:26.279 --> 00:08:29.040 that brought me intense joy. And it doesn't have to 146 00:08:29.040 --> 00:08:32.799 be kid rely, it can be, it doesn't have to be. 147 00:08:33.399 --> 00:08:36.960 And so like for me, we just had I live 148 00:08:36.960 --> 00:08:39.840 in Malta. Now we just had Carnival, which is this 149 00:08:40.159 --> 00:08:46.480 five day party before Lent and it's huge, and my 150 00:08:46.519 --> 00:08:48.879 wife and I were at a masquerade. I mean, I 151 00:08:48.879 --> 00:08:50.799 have never been at anything like this. If you've ever 152 00:08:50.840 --> 00:08:56.080 seen Fridgerton, we were in Ridgerton for a night in masks, 153 00:08:56.879 --> 00:08:59.600 doing the dancing. I mean, they're playing the Bridgerton music 154 00:08:59.600 --> 00:09:03.320 and everything with with a live protect and so the 155 00:09:03.360 --> 00:09:05.639 second he goes in that tantrum, I'm like, well, I'm 156 00:09:05.639 --> 00:09:08.399 just gonna think about that mass breed. I'm happy again. 157 00:09:10.240 --> 00:09:12.679 That's like I'm not even phased. And I think that 158 00:09:12.840 --> 00:09:15.039 really helps. I think that really helps bring you up 159 00:09:15.039 --> 00:09:18.639 to that healer level parenting that that mom can say 160 00:09:18.720 --> 00:09:21.000 is impossible and it's not is very doable. 161 00:09:21.360 --> 00:09:24.720 It's so interesting that you talk about being the only dad. 162 00:09:25.440 --> 00:09:29.559 I during COVID especially, I have a job where I 163 00:09:29.600 --> 00:09:31.759 had the unique opportunity where I could be at home 164 00:09:31.840 --> 00:09:35.720 with the kids, and my wife, Amanda, had a job 165 00:09:35.799 --> 00:09:39.519 where it was considered an essential and so she was 166 00:09:39.559 --> 00:09:42.799 at work all the time, and I spent a ton 167 00:09:42.840 --> 00:09:46.000 of time with my kids and I enjoyed it. I 168 00:09:46.039 --> 00:09:48.879 loved it, and a lot of times like after that, 169 00:09:49.399 --> 00:09:53.159 I would be the only dad at things, for example, 170 00:09:53.159 --> 00:09:55.720 a field trip at the kids' school. I could take 171 00:09:55.720 --> 00:09:58.440 off work and go, and so it would be a 172 00:09:58.480 --> 00:10:01.639 bunch of moms and me, and even if there were 173 00:10:01.679 --> 00:10:04.399 other dads, the other dads a lot of times would 174 00:10:04.399 --> 00:10:07.480 group together and talk about work, and I would spend 175 00:10:07.559 --> 00:10:10.320 time with the moms talking about the kids and what 176 00:10:10.399 --> 00:10:13.279 they're up to, and that is such a unique perspective. 177 00:10:13.320 --> 00:10:16.440 I'm glad you brought that up, because it really does 178 00:10:16.559 --> 00:10:21.519 present a challenge. And once you realize that it's completely normal, 179 00:10:21.799 --> 00:10:26.759 it's it's our own trepidation that makes it seem not normal. 180 00:10:28.360 --> 00:10:30.679 Yeah, and then the idea. 181 00:10:30.320 --> 00:10:35.320 That being free to be yourself is such an important thing. 182 00:10:35.440 --> 00:10:37.600 And I talked to my kids about that a lot. 183 00:10:37.759 --> 00:10:40.759 I remember being young and I was the kid who 184 00:10:40.919 --> 00:10:44.360 was too cool to do things. And I look at Amanda, 185 00:10:44.519 --> 00:10:48.039 my wife, and she is like this free spirit. She'll 186 00:10:48.200 --> 00:10:51.200 dance in the grocery store and embarrass the kids and stuff. 187 00:10:51.240 --> 00:10:54.759 And I told Stella and Henry, the way your mom 188 00:10:54.879 --> 00:10:58.840 is is an enviable thing, and you should feel comfortable 189 00:10:59.039 --> 00:11:01.840 doing that and being that way, because you're not going 190 00:11:01.919 --> 00:11:05.279 to look back later and regret being free. You're going 191 00:11:05.320 --> 00:11:09.559 to look back later and regret putting these confines on yourself. 192 00:11:10.799 --> 00:11:14.279 I completely agree. There's literally an example in the book, 193 00:11:14.320 --> 00:11:16.600 one of the first examples, I want to say, chapter 194 00:11:16.600 --> 00:11:19.759 one or two, and it's this is a real thing 195 00:11:19.759 --> 00:11:23.240 that happened my daughter. I was shopping with her at 196 00:11:23.240 --> 00:11:29.399 Trader Joe's I'm this is in Delaware and she was 197 00:11:29.559 --> 00:11:32.000 three at the time, and you can picture that three 198 00:11:32.120 --> 00:11:37.360 major phase where she was like on the cusp of 199 00:11:37.399 --> 00:11:42.080 a meltdown. I'm sure any of my everyone has been there, yep. 200 00:11:42.399 --> 00:11:43.879 And I mean she was there and you could see 201 00:11:43.879 --> 00:11:46.200 all the warning sun, the steam blown out of her ears, 202 00:11:46.200 --> 00:11:49.720 basically like she was right there and we're in the 203 00:11:49.720 --> 00:11:52.799 middle of the grocery store, and I just went full bandit. 204 00:11:52.919 --> 00:11:54.360 I mean, this is one of the things I loved 205 00:11:54.360 --> 00:11:57.559 about Louie right away is it's so dad centered too. 206 00:11:58.039 --> 00:11:59.960 And the dad's not an idiot. This is not Pep 207 00:12:00.080 --> 00:12:03.759 the Pig's dad. This is not Homer Simpson. God, how 208 00:12:03.759 --> 00:12:07.480 many cartoon dads have been like the buffoon right He's 209 00:12:07.559 --> 00:12:10.159 you know, he's goofy, but he's also a great dad. 210 00:12:10.559 --> 00:12:12.919 And so I went full bandit, and I you know, 211 00:12:13.080 --> 00:12:15.919 I brought out my freezer ray and I was using 212 00:12:15.960 --> 00:12:17.720 it and I handed it to her, and then I 213 00:12:17.799 --> 00:12:20.279 was doing all these things, and then she had to 214 00:12:20.320 --> 00:12:24.360 melt me in the right there in the supermarket. And 215 00:12:24.519 --> 00:12:26.919 one of the reasons that that memory stood out and 216 00:12:27.080 --> 00:12:30.480 made it into the book is at the end of 217 00:12:30.559 --> 00:12:32.519 us playing around and she was laughing, and then we 218 00:12:32.559 --> 00:12:36.240 had fun and she started helping me shop. This random 219 00:12:36.960 --> 00:12:39.440 stranger came up to me a mother and it's like, 220 00:12:40.039 --> 00:12:41.879 you are such a good dad. 221 00:12:42.039 --> 00:12:46.039 I was like thanks, but you know, it felt kind 222 00:12:46.039 --> 00:12:49.000 of nice and it was like, okay, you know, just 223 00:12:49.039 --> 00:12:51.399 getting out of your comfort zone, just as he said, 224 00:12:51.480 --> 00:12:55.360 dancing in front of people, being able to take those risks, 225 00:12:55.399 --> 00:12:59.639 because I think, ultimately, you know, you matter, and the 226 00:12:59.720 --> 00:13:00.440 kid matters. 227 00:13:00.720 --> 00:13:04.559 You know, that bond, that connection matters. Ultimately, does anybody 228 00:13:04.559 --> 00:13:08.600 else really matter in that situation? Do those other shoppers? 229 00:13:08.799 --> 00:13:10.720 You know, does it really matter if you look like 230 00:13:10.720 --> 00:13:11.759 a full Not? 231 00:13:11.840 --> 00:13:12.159 Really. 232 00:13:13.159 --> 00:13:15.799 That's a great way to look at it, because a 233 00:13:15.840 --> 00:13:20.240 lot of times we as humans in society are convinced 234 00:13:20.279 --> 00:13:23.279 that everybody around us is analyzing our every move. 235 00:13:23.759 --> 00:13:25.960 Oh my gosh, they're all looking at me. And when 236 00:13:26.000 --> 00:13:26.559 you think. 237 00:13:26.399 --> 00:13:29.960 About the realities of that, everybody's thinking that, so they're 238 00:13:30.000 --> 00:13:34.679 not looking at anybody else because they're so inward focused 239 00:13:34.679 --> 00:13:37.120 and not in a narcissistic way. But that's just the 240 00:13:37.159 --> 00:13:41.080 tendency because people are so self conscious about things. But 241 00:13:41.120 --> 00:13:46.279 those are the kind of activities that kids will remember forever. 242 00:13:47.320 --> 00:13:52.000 And my stepmom told me that my dad had told 243 00:13:52.039 --> 00:13:54.559 her once after visiting us that I wish I had 244 00:13:54.600 --> 00:13:59.279 been a dad like Eric is, And that blew my 245 00:13:59.360 --> 00:14:03.519 mind because he grew up in an era where he 246 00:14:03.600 --> 00:14:06.320 did better than his dad did, but he was a 247 00:14:06.360 --> 00:14:12.080 lot more stoic and way less demonstrative with his emotions 248 00:14:12.080 --> 00:14:14.159 and that sort of thing. And to know that he 249 00:14:14.240 --> 00:14:17.399 said that about my parenting style, it blessed my soul 250 00:14:17.960 --> 00:14:21.240 and it made me so happy to know that, because 251 00:14:21.320 --> 00:14:24.080 that is something I have consciously made an effort to do, 252 00:14:24.600 --> 00:14:26.320 is be there for my kids in a way that 253 00:14:26.480 --> 00:14:27.799 relates to them. 254 00:14:28.320 --> 00:14:31.039 I can't talk to them like they're adults. They're not adults. 255 00:14:31.120 --> 00:14:35.120 They will understand certain things and remember certain things, and 256 00:14:35.240 --> 00:14:38.440 I know from my perspective there are things that my 257 00:14:38.600 --> 00:14:43.240 kids will probably remember forever because I decided to step 258 00:14:43.320 --> 00:14:45.240 out of that comfort zone. 259 00:14:45.559 --> 00:14:48.919 Honestly, that's the method. In a nutshell, that's what I'm 260 00:14:48.919 --> 00:14:51.879 going for, is you talk about it. I'm going to 261 00:14:51.879 --> 00:14:54.720 borrow the phrase from inside out that you're creating these 262 00:14:54.759 --> 00:14:58.840 core memories and a lot of those memories with your kids. 263 00:14:59.240 --> 00:15:01.639 When I was first staying at home as a stay 264 00:15:01.639 --> 00:15:05.360 at home dad, I started looking up resources eventually, and 265 00:15:05.399 --> 00:15:08.399 I came across a guy who's now my friend. I'm 266 00:15:08.440 --> 00:15:12.039 Shandon Carpenter, just an internet friend. We've never met, but 267 00:15:13.360 --> 00:15:15.360 he had a book out for stay at home dads, 268 00:15:15.720 --> 00:15:18.480 and I had never come across one of those, and 269 00:15:18.639 --> 00:15:24.200 he was encouraging these dad ventures. And I still do 270 00:15:24.279 --> 00:15:27.960 it five years after reading that book. This is becoming. 271 00:15:28.080 --> 00:15:31.240 I just took my last one last week. I make 272 00:15:31.279 --> 00:15:33.120 sure I get one on one time where we will 273 00:15:33.120 --> 00:15:36.679 take some sort of trip, something fun, just one on 274 00:15:36.679 --> 00:15:40.440 one with each kid, and you talk about the core 275 00:15:40.519 --> 00:15:44.120 memories though that you're building, and it doesn't have to 276 00:15:44.120 --> 00:15:47.759 be an adventure, a dad venture, you know. One of 277 00:15:47.799 --> 00:15:54.039 the examples I gave, ironically, and that was honestly really 278 00:15:54.080 --> 00:15:56.879 fundamental to the method, to the book and to me 279 00:15:56.919 --> 00:16:00.000 as a parent, is the first day of homes school, 280 00:16:00.679 --> 00:16:03.519 the first day during lockdown to go back to COVID. 281 00:16:03.759 --> 00:16:07.240 And I remember that day so well, for all the 282 00:16:07.240 --> 00:16:09.000 good and the bad. I'm sure a lot of people 283 00:16:09.039 --> 00:16:14.120 have similar memories. And that day I went like nuts, 284 00:16:14.159 --> 00:16:16.720 like we did. My daughter was born, but she was, 285 00:16:18.120 --> 00:16:21.039 you know, breastfeeding infants, so I didn't really have much 286 00:16:21.080 --> 00:16:24.960 time with her. My son and I was. I was like, well, 287 00:16:25.000 --> 00:16:26.960 we're gonna do this, We're gonna do this, We're gonna 288 00:16:26.960 --> 00:16:29.200 do it. I mean, we had it. And so the 289 00:16:29.200 --> 00:16:31.519 next day I could barely move because I was so exhausted. 290 00:16:32.960 --> 00:16:35.840 I blew it that way. But one of the things 291 00:16:35.879 --> 00:16:38.000 we did is we went and explored the solar system. 292 00:16:38.240 --> 00:16:41.559 I mean we literally built an entire rocket, got in 293 00:16:41.639 --> 00:16:45.279 it and went to like all the different planets. And 294 00:16:45.600 --> 00:16:48.399 this is what improv is all about. That's this is 295 00:16:48.399 --> 00:16:52.200 what you're seeing in blue is you're seeing improvisation. You're 296 00:16:52.240 --> 00:16:57.600 seeing Blui or Bingo come up with an idea, and 297 00:16:57.679 --> 00:17:01.279 we call these bricks in theater and idea. Any type 298 00:17:01.279 --> 00:17:04.880 of unit of information is a brick. This is a 299 00:17:04.960 --> 00:17:08.240 rocket is a brick. To think about, Bluie, We're in 300 00:17:08.279 --> 00:17:11.400 a bus. That's a brick. I'm Janet. That's a brick. 301 00:17:11.440 --> 00:17:13.680 You're the driver. Every single one of those is a brick, 302 00:17:14.359 --> 00:17:17.160 and you go build a wall. That's how you think 303 00:17:17.200 --> 00:17:19.160 of it. An improv is you say yes to their 304 00:17:19.160 --> 00:17:20.799 brick and you put a brick on top of it. 305 00:17:21.119 --> 00:17:22.680 This is what I was doing with my son. We 306 00:17:22.759 --> 00:17:25.839 built a rocktep. He's like, oh, mill engines are busted. 307 00:17:25.920 --> 00:17:28.279 I was like, that's why we're landing here on Venus. 308 00:17:28.319 --> 00:17:31.119 We're looking for engines going We're doing the whole thing. 309 00:17:32.039 --> 00:17:35.160 But I gotta tell you something, Eric, we still sing 310 00:17:35.279 --> 00:17:37.240 the song we wrote a song because I really was 311 00:17:37.279 --> 00:17:41.039 overdoing it as a teacher, and we still sing the 312 00:17:41.079 --> 00:17:44.680 song though it's been years. He's only nine now, and 313 00:17:44.680 --> 00:17:47.799 it's like around those song we have fun. It's the 314 00:17:47.880 --> 00:17:50.799 stupidest little song, like the Order of the Planets, but 315 00:17:51.039 --> 00:17:55.400 it's such a core memory that it's like, you know 316 00:17:55.480 --> 00:17:59.720 this this work, peopill remember this just at our basement 317 00:17:59.799 --> 00:18:03.400 with pillows on the first day of lockdown, Like I 318 00:18:03.400 --> 00:18:06.279 don't know. That's what it's about in my head. Creating 319 00:18:06.319 --> 00:18:08.400 those core memories, creating those bombs. 320 00:18:09.519 --> 00:18:10.599 That's so cool. 321 00:18:11.160 --> 00:18:13.759 My kids, we get a lot of that's the same 322 00:18:13.799 --> 00:18:16.200 way because my wife would be the same way with 323 00:18:16.279 --> 00:18:18.640 the kids, and there's a song that she made up 324 00:18:18.680 --> 00:18:22.240 whenever they would brush their teeth and they still remember 325 00:18:22.240 --> 00:18:25.680 it even though they're much older now and they're like, oh, 326 00:18:25.720 --> 00:18:29.319 how embarrassing, but they remember it because it meant something 327 00:18:29.359 --> 00:18:33.200 to them, And what a cool approach. That's so neat. 328 00:18:33.359 --> 00:18:36.559 I'm so glad that you shared that with me. I'm curious, 329 00:18:36.559 --> 00:18:39.480 how did you discover Bluie Oh ma'n. 330 00:18:39.880 --> 00:18:42.839 I am not sure. I think I saw it recommended 331 00:18:42.920 --> 00:18:46.119 on a dad's group. I'm pretty sure you. I'm pretty 332 00:18:46.160 --> 00:18:48.680 sure some people were talking about it. I want to 333 00:18:48.720 --> 00:18:51.680 stay on Facebook. I was in a number of dad's 334 00:18:51.720 --> 00:18:54.200 groups because I was feeling isolated. I was already a 335 00:18:54.200 --> 00:18:58.200 stann out and it kind of feel isolating. I eventually 336 00:18:58.319 --> 00:19:03.079 met one other step dad. I'm he was like in 337 00:19:03.119 --> 00:19:03.799 a gay couple. 338 00:19:04.319 --> 00:19:04.680 I'm so. 339 00:19:04.759 --> 00:19:07.160 He stayed at home law his husband worked. I had 340 00:19:07.240 --> 00:19:10.440 never met until him, and he ended up being a neighbor. 341 00:19:11.000 --> 00:19:13.720 I had never met another stand up dad in person. 342 00:19:13.799 --> 00:19:15.559 I wanted to do the round there. So I went 343 00:19:15.599 --> 00:19:17.440 on the internet and I was like, come on, there 344 00:19:17.519 --> 00:19:19.759 must be other dads and I'm Kip, just be me, 345 00:19:20.599 --> 00:19:24.279 I'm and I yeah, definitely a lot of the dads 346 00:19:24.319 --> 00:19:27.319 were talking about this show. It's like, you got to 347 00:19:27.400 --> 00:19:30.039 check this out, and so I remember checking it out 348 00:19:30.079 --> 00:19:35.440 and one of the first episodes I saw was was 349 00:19:35.519 --> 00:19:39.519 Magic Xylophone, and I was instantly like, wait a second, 350 00:19:39.960 --> 00:19:43.160 because magic Xylophone is freeze is what we call it 351 00:19:43.200 --> 00:19:46.920 in improv, and it is the introductory lesson. So I 352 00:19:47.000 --> 00:19:51.000 used to teach improv, as I said, theater teacher, improv coach, 353 00:19:51.640 --> 00:19:55.000 and when you teach improv, that's the first unit is 354 00:19:55.079 --> 00:19:55.920 that episode. 355 00:19:56.519 --> 00:19:57.279 And this is one of. 356 00:19:57.319 --> 00:19:59.079 The first shows I'm seeing a Blue. I'm like, wait 357 00:19:59.119 --> 00:20:01.759 a second, they're just doing freeze and he's turned into show. 358 00:20:02.079 --> 00:20:04.319 And then the more I watched, the more I realized 359 00:20:04.359 --> 00:20:08.880 that and this is true. Ninety eight percent of Blue 360 00:20:09.960 --> 00:20:14.519 that is actually true is improvisation. That's how it works. 361 00:20:14.599 --> 00:20:16.920 Almost every episode, Joe is going to take a different 362 00:20:17.079 --> 00:20:21.359 scenario and he's going to have them improvise together. One 363 00:20:21.440 --> 00:20:25.279 of my favorite episodes when it came out that really 364 00:20:25.279 --> 00:20:29.160 blew my mind was Octopus because that was the first 365 00:20:29.200 --> 00:20:33.079 time you take it away from the healers and I 366 00:20:33.119 --> 00:20:35.079 have been like, gosh, this feels like improv. This feels 367 00:20:35.079 --> 00:20:37.759 like improv. And then I really felt like Joe was 368 00:20:37.839 --> 00:20:40.480 acknowledging it to the audience because there's this moment when 369 00:20:40.519 --> 00:20:43.680 clothing her dad. This is the one where Chloe wants 370 00:20:43.680 --> 00:20:47.119 to to parent like Louie's dad and stop and she 371 00:20:47.119 --> 00:20:50.119 wants her dad to and he's struggling, and so they 372 00:20:50.160 --> 00:20:53.880 discover what's the is there saying no, They need to 373 00:20:53.920 --> 00:20:57.160 say yes, which is the foundation of improv need to 374 00:20:57.240 --> 00:21:00.440 build off each others. It's like I I felt like 375 00:21:00.559 --> 00:21:02.799 that was for those of us who know theater, that 376 00:21:02.960 --> 00:21:06.079 was the let's break the fourth wall and acknowledge what's 377 00:21:06.119 --> 00:21:08.799 happening behind the scenes episode. I don't know if that 378 00:21:08.920 --> 00:21:11.920 was its intent or not, but that's how it how 379 00:21:11.920 --> 00:21:15.240 it's to me. But yeah, once I discovered it, I 380 00:21:15.920 --> 00:21:19.240 was hooked. And it's a great show and I've I've 381 00:21:19.279 --> 00:21:20.240 loved it ever since. 382 00:21:20.839 --> 00:21:23.519 It is amazing. I was shocked at how much I 383 00:21:23.519 --> 00:21:26.559 connected to it. I am a big Star Wars fan 384 00:21:26.720 --> 00:21:29.440 and a lot of my Star Wars friends are from Australia, 385 00:21:29.920 --> 00:21:34.680 and because culturally Australians, they travel and so whenever we 386 00:21:34.720 --> 00:21:37.240 would have the big Star Wars conventions, that's how I 387 00:21:37.319 --> 00:21:40.240 met them. And they kept telling me, You've got to 388 00:21:40.279 --> 00:21:43.359 check out this show, Bluie. You would love it, I'm 389 00:21:43.359 --> 00:21:46.400 telling you. And that was right when it was coming 390 00:21:46.440 --> 00:21:49.559 on Disney Plus and I was floored. I was hooked 391 00:21:49.680 --> 00:21:55.640 immediately because I identified with bandit so much and just watching 392 00:21:55.680 --> 00:21:58.720 the style of play, watching the respect he showed the 393 00:21:58.799 --> 00:22:02.359 kids and their thought process while still pointing them in 394 00:22:02.440 --> 00:22:05.599 the right direction, not being afraid to have fun, all 395 00:22:05.640 --> 00:22:07.640 of that stuff. It really spoke to me on a 396 00:22:07.640 --> 00:22:10.240 big level. And it's interesting that you talk about that 397 00:22:10.359 --> 00:22:14.359 episode Octopus, because it felt very familiar to me. I 398 00:22:14.440 --> 00:22:16.880 do a lot of things that are theater adjacent, and 399 00:22:16.920 --> 00:22:19.200 I have a friend who's big in improv and he 400 00:22:19.240 --> 00:22:23.880 talks about it. It's always yes and yes, and and 401 00:22:23.960 --> 00:22:27.599