Speaker 1: On this week's episode of Tom and Jerry Show, I'm
on other Things, the boys get to discuss in a
very memorable day in America when a whale became beached. Now,
the plan was to get rid of the sudden thing.
Can't very well flush it down toilet, can't throw it
in back of lan drove and take it to dump?
What they could have called Fred Dibner. Surely I could
have come up with some kind of plan better than
what they actually did. That's right, they called the bloody dynamite.
Men enjoyed the episode, I'll see the.
Speaker 2: Hello and welcome to the Tom and Jerry podcast, where
I'm Tom. Will tell you this, this is how, this
is where we are right now. Tom, o'manney over there,
Can you confirm to the listeners that I, Jerry McBride
am with hand rubbing vaulter all essential to a sore shoulder,
while in the other hand is a Cannaheineken.
Speaker 3: I mean, it's medicinal in every direction. But I want
to say that if you an only fan's page could
open on what Jerry is doing right now, just massaging
himself underneath his own T shirt. And now I kind
of want to massage my two fucked up shoulders.
Speaker 2: Jeseuz, I'm massage my massage and my can lift and
hand because I tell you it's been a day. Ladies
and gentlemen, I hope you had a better day than
I did.
Speaker 3: You haven't been out filling potholes all day?
Speaker 2: Gee, I haven't been breaking rocks Tom Every now and then,
I've decided to derail the what is supposed to be
a comedy podcast here? But have you ever been to
the Titanic exhibition up in Belfast?
Speaker 3: No, I don't have any interesting crashes.
Speaker 2: It's that's the thing. If you're going there for a
story of how the Titanic sunk, you'll be disappointed. It's
a story about how the thing was built.
Speaker 3: The fuck they made a bollock of it. I want
to find it. I want to find out how a
fucking bad joke was fucking made. Tell me how good
joke was made.
Speaker 2: Well, anytime you feel like giving out about a day's work,
I was thinking about the boys building, not just the Titanic,
but any number of ships that ended up floating home
where when you turned up with Harlan and whof Wolf
for a day's work, there was a high probability that
someone up from you on a scaffolding wasn't the Catholic,
wasn't the Catholic, and would drop a white hot rivet
that would just pass cleanly through your fucking skull with
no resistance, just to drop bore a hole smooth through
your fucking skull. But then we stopped sizzling by the
time maybe it got to your small intestine.
Speaker 3: Yeah, but there was a day. You know, when you
put down a day's work like that chair, you fucking
earned your dinner, you know that kind of way, like
you felt like you did the day's work.
Speaker 2: I earned a rub of alter all on an you doing, buddy.
Speaker 3: By the way, I'm delighted. I filled twelve potholes that
are after accruing in our in in the driveway.
Speaker 2: Oh shit, that wasn't a metaphor, you were.
Speaker 3: I was literally filling potholes. So's it's it's it's a
fun family day out ourself drives. I go with a
big load of buckets of because of a half ton
of EIGHTO four out the side of the house.
Speaker 2: And I'm not being smart here, Tom, Where are you
filling these.
Speaker 3: Ball when you do come to visit it become very
parent with the five hundred meters of road that I've
built through the forest. So it needs touch ups every
so often.
Speaker 2: That's what I was going to say. So it's not
no disrespect, Like, you know, I don't think you're at
the pothole here and there kind of stage of the job.
You're at the fairly substantial road lane in the things, right.
Speaker 3: Oh yeah, well the road is laid, it's in, but
I mean it needs maintenance because still trucks come over
and stuff like that. And I go over it on
a fucking fair regular basis, and then you got a
torrential rain and then you've got mountain runoff and everything else.
So you catch it's here's the thing. You drive down,
someone drive away and it's full of potholes. They never
they just fucking looked at the pothole getting bigger. If
you can catch it early and have a potato four
into it, pack it in nice and tight, you bought
yourself about four or five months in that hole coming again.
Like it's just like an old quart or something. You
just get on it quick and don't be fucking looking
at it, because.
Speaker 2: It's literally a stitch in time. If you get a
bit of Ato's an Aero four to before we get
into the show proper, coming a four to the listeners
of the Tom and Jerry Show, that not be.
Speaker 3: I'm gonna bury. I'm gonna bury the entire fucking show here.
Did you just open that fucking can of worms to me? Tom?
Would you mind?
Speaker 2: You just go to there? Tom? What I think?
Speaker 3: Take the floor there? And eight or four? Eight or
four is the code, the standard code given to it,
and it's owl. Fellers would call it two inch down
to if you if you imagine like something a stone
fifty millimeters and everything all the way down to dust.
That is what it is. And it's great consistency. It's
normally a limes is, it's later gran. It's normally limestone based.
Yeah yeah, yeah you can. You can get a shadey one.
But it doesn't last long like it packs together really well.
But it eventually we turned to mud. I won't. The
whole idea of it is you see people, you see
when they rip up all roads, they put this stuff down,
and it's just so you can get a nice shape
on the road, rolling in nice and flat. But it
doesn't last forever. And we're hoping tarmac will be coming
early next year. It is imminent. So I'm just kind
of going, I don't see this thing lasting in good shape.
It's in I don't see it lessen too many more winters.
And that's what ATO four is. It's the greatest stone,
a a K two inch down. You put it down
as a base course underneath tarmac atom. That's what it is.
And if if you are ever getting it, if you're
ever getting tarmac atom and the person or the company
does not lay eight or four prior, then it ask them,
why have you not laid eight O four underneath that?
Speaker 2: First? Please? For the for the female listeners or should
I say for the female listener of the Tom and
Jerry show.
Speaker 3: It's there's more than one, there is, I tell you.
Speaker 2: It's it's what I imagine. Not very well versed in
these things, but it's what I imagine foundation is when
you're putting on your make.
Speaker 3: That's exactly what it is, because I've gone through this
with herself, and that's exactly what it is. It's the
it's the base course before you put the wearing coats
of course on. Literally, that's what makeup as far as
folk and weird and you know what I.
Speaker 2: Man well and and and and by that metric that
the tarmac, the stuff, the black stuff you drive and
walk on is just your it's your bronzer, it's your finish.
Speaker 3: Is that I don't know that next stage? Face is
the next phase?
Speaker 2: Is it.
Speaker 3: A long time now to say about my whole staring
at what the wife is doing when putting makeup on?
Like you know what I mean?
Speaker 2: And what do we do?
Speaker 3: Like if I asked her now, she goes, yeah, you're
asking me? If anything, she just wonder what's what I'm
up to? If I started asking her about her makeup procedures,
what do you fucking plan? What this?
Speaker 2: For a bit? Yeah?
Speaker 3: Or for sure? Everything she does now? If I quizro on,
it's like is this going on stage? And I'm like, yeah, yeah, you.
Speaker 2: Don't even have to ask anymore. And anything that we
don't put into our lives as comedians. Tom as a
functioning stand up comedian, me as a lapsed one. But
I tell jokes on Twitter and the whatnot. Anything that
doesn't make the cut for those channels ends up in
this podcast. To be honest with you, this is the
shakings of the bag. We split it up into three
segments where you find listeners and the first segment takes
a look at the news from the week come by
in a segment week ago, the weekly what have you.
This is a very complicated case, mad you know, a
lot of ian's, a lot of outs, a lot of
what have you, and a lot of strands to keep
in my head man.
Speaker 3: So the the excitement around this is actually real geral.
When I honestly sent this Antia, I thought it was
a mess. So I'll jump straight into into ig Noble winning.
Now ig Nobel Award has been around for like about
thirty thirty id years, right, and it's it's the off
Broadway of the Nobel Peace Prize, which is all hauling
you from my hats. I g is genuinely a thing
that has been discovered, has been It's noally based around science,
but it'll make you a laugh while at the same
time making you think like this can't be just somebody
going what if we flow to the thun No, this
has to actually be peer reviewed and everything and the
actually a thing. But at the same time, you ain't
get you ain't get a Nobel Prize for putting have
to be like it has to be. They described it
as been makes you laugh and makes you think weird science.
Tom makes it onto the Tom of Jerry show what
an ig noble. So this procedure or this technique is
is straight up is straight up. It's on the side
of the can. That's it's called butt breathing technique that
moves one step closer to saving lives.
Speaker 2: Chair Yeah now, yeah, I got nothing to walk me
through this one.
Speaker 3: So it was discovered Japanese chap and there's a couple
of people who are kind of in on it. Right,
there's where's the I can't pronounce that gentleman's name. So
let's spare everybody's blowses here, Tom, do you know what
we will? No, fuck it. I'll give it a go.
Speaker 2: Doctor.
Speaker 3: Yeah, this is exactly what I think it would should
sound like technorie ignor.
Speaker 2: So okay, that's no.
Speaker 3: They'd love that, the lads. Here's the thing. If you
if I just said that out like if I'm perfect
Japanese friend of mine and as she she speaks Japanese
and I was asking her, so I was I was
pronounced the name. Yeah, but that's no good. You literally
have to do it in the voice. They won't understand
what you're saying if you say if you don't say
as fuck off. So if you say canish you are
like a big a western whitey heading us like we are.
Speaker 2: They'll go effort.
Speaker 3: You literally have to go to and they go, well.
Speaker 2: You know how, yeah we are, we are. We are
gambling the history of the tom and Jerry Friend says.
Speaker 3: So, so essentially this lad has come up with by
by studying animals that do it as a result of
so turtles can do it, right, but breathing, yeah, baby,
dragonflies can do it. And it's for people with clogged
lungs to survive by breathing through their whole chair no joke,
no joke, drawn air in through the exhaust essentially is
what which is typically would go that's a terrible thing
to happen, but it is a technique that he's developed
when for people that are still in the process to say,
getting their lungs cleared out or their lungs are compromised
in some which way that you can actually it's it's
officially called teral ential not internal, but ential ventilation.
Speaker 2: So taking the pissome I'm not, I swear to God.
Speaker 3: So it's it's teral, so it's not you know, it's
not an extraction ventilation, So.
Speaker 2: You're so here's the crack when you know, we talk
out of our arses all the time, all right, Ah,
but if it's one thing I understand about the anus
is that it's not a one way street. And I
don't mean like it's not a one way street. I
mean to say, you've often heard tell of people soaking
rags with vodka and sticking them up themselves to draw
it into themselves, like it will absorb as well as
it will push out waste a lane.
Speaker 3: Here, you're not because you're you're getting straight into I
suppose you're getting straight into the intestinal wall there. Any
stuff gets in fast into your system if you get
it up against the the the intestinal wall.
Speaker 2: So so with that being said, if you can draw
in alcohol into your bloodstream through your intestinal wall two
inches inside your pipe, then it stands the reason that
you can draw in nutrients as well. And if you
can draw in nutrients, can you draw in oxygen?
Speaker 3: This doctor says, yes, this is him. This is I'm
not gonna well, I do an accent. I want to know,
maybe don't just let me have one this is the
first human data, and the results are limited sodly to
demonstrating the safety of the procedure and not its effectiveness
just yet. So they've they've opened the gate, They've pulled
down the depents, they pulled down the underpants on this
proceed You're right, you haven't quite perfected it. I'm guessing
what they have done, because you can't say something's affect
us effectiveness until you've done like a five hundred trials,
you know that kind of way.
Speaker 2: Like, well, I'll tell you, Tom, they haven't. They haven't
perfected inhaling through the arts. I've become a damn handed exhaling.
Speaker 3: No, there was at some point we're going to get that.
I knew you were.
Speaker 2: I got a stack of them, Tommy.
Speaker 3: I'm pretty sure actually might have even messaged me that back.
Speaker 2: But they remind me to tell this one joke, Tom,
But I got nothing else.
Speaker 3: So he says, But now that we've established tolerance, the
next step would be to have value it how effective
the process is in delivering oxygen into the bloodstreams. So
like reptiles, metabolism metabolized way slower than normal mammals, so
they don't need it. In a hurry. But I'm guessing
what he's hoping will happen is that you'll if your
lungs a compromise. Maybe you can draw in a bit,
but you can also draw it so you don't have
to get to the lungs, right, it's about get The
lungs are only there to get oxygen into your bloodstream.
But if you can go straight up the fucking pipe
and get it straight through the watch wall, now, I
don't think it'll ever get to a point where you
won't need your RUMs at all at all.
Speaker 2: Right, so you can just sit with your head in
the bucket of water and you know, like you won't.
Speaker 3: Go scuba dive without your arse up out of the year,
but able to pick pick fucking cockles for an hour,
like you know what I mean? It would be unreal.
Speaker 2: But no, I don't know what was the fucking pint
of what we're doing. Okay, So so so the long
and the short of it as I'm here and here
now it's not but breeding, like you know, you make
your arsh talk like a venture is like like dark failure,
like if we're talking a tube of oxygen up your
bumbhole while your lungs recover from being in a fire
or some shit.
Speaker 3: Well, I think it's actually I don't think they're going
to shove a pipe of gas up your whole. I
think it's actually it's a an oxygenated liquid that can
hold like a very like nearly more than what the
actual gas form itself.
Speaker 2: In the abyss.
Speaker 3: Yeah, exactly, it's so okay, So this is super concentrated,
concentrated liquid.
Speaker 2: They're wiping the pink abyssoop up.
Speaker 3: Your peep, yep, yep.
Speaker 2: While you're there, you've you've you've had your lungs fried
in a chemical warfare attack because it is the year
twenty thirty and the machines have taken over.
Speaker 3: That's one hundred percent.
Speaker 2: So it's while while you're fried mustard gas frazzled lungs
are trying their best to repair themselves, you're walking around
with air slop up your.
Speaker 3: Arse as squelching as you walk like a pair of
full wellies.
Speaker 2: Do you know what I mean?
Speaker 3: So he's it's this stuff is actually called let me
all right, christ Tom reading out loud, perfluoro.
Speaker 2: Desoline fluoral desoline.
Speaker 3: Okay, yeah, yeah, it's a liquid. Well, I mean you've
have you taken. No, you you've had, you've you've swallowed
stuff the other way that's blown out. You wrecked them,
all right, So it's taken directly and as to hold it,
hold it in there for sixty minutes. So he's done this.
The twenty seven healthy Japanese man quantities were increased throughout
the in some cases reaching a later and a half
of the liquid twenty after twenty seven reached the sixty
minute goal, and while those on the larger amounts reported
some discomfort and abtimal bloating. I wonder why there was
no serious side effects. No detectable absorption of the liquid.
Discomfort appear to have been associated now here right. Here's
the thing. He's on the road. He's not there yet,
but it is. People are happy with what he's doing.
But I from past experience, I have had a very
fancy enema before.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so have I.
Speaker 3: I remember I was, I was telling you about my one,
and then they put no. I don't think I needed it,
to be honest. I'm mean, regular is my middle fucking name,
Like you know what I mean. I was nearly half
a disappointment in the lady. I'm pretty sure it was like,
I feel fine, but they can't.
Speaker 2: They count on They count when they do that, they
count on making tips from the change you swallowed as
a seven year old still being that that just it
pushes out a millennium fifty p and their quid and
their quid's up.
Speaker 3: Did carried you on your weight like a truck, like
a truck scales. They you on your way driving out
of the place.
Speaker 2: She did you had the one where you had the
hole r M.
Speaker 3: She and she poured some liquid what did they call it,
pre biotics back up me and she just hanging all
onto that for like five minutes. I'm like, I'll fucking try.
Speaker 2: It sounds it sounds like a thing that you should
be able to do.
Speaker 3: I was able to do it. As it turns out,
I didn't know what I'd be able to do. I
was able to do it. And then you just kind
of let it off. I was about a liter and
stuff and then but I'm not joking you. I was on.
I was in. I could have I could have gone
to fucking WrestleMania and fought in the main event. I
was like a fucking charging bull. I felt eighteen, Do
you know what I mean? I felt like a fucking
bull after I wasn't know what bro pre But what
I'm saying is, regardless of the amount of steroids she
clearly snuck into me that that day, the absorption up
through the exhaust pipe absolutely does work.
Speaker 2: So so tell me, Tom, now, what is the future
of butt breathing. Is this the kind of thing that
you will see butt breathing pop up shops that will
show up in shopping centers like those we fish that
used to eat the dead skin off your toes?
Speaker 3: Well as I think as vaping becomes even becomes as
unpopular as cigarette smoking, you know, in areas, I think
that this is probably where it's going down though, because
that's what happens to a lot of these, you know,
these off Broadway science projects, is that they end up
being something for the consumer more than the actual medical field.
So I think what we're going to see is, like
I mean, it truly will become a lost mary as
it will get lost up your whole. I think that's
that's I think that's where kids are. You know, kids
are always up to the next fucking thing. They're sniffing
fucking car tires, do you know what I mean? They're hoofing,
fucking you know, each other's dandruff, whatever it is they're doing.
I guarantee you the next thing is going to be
some kid that's gonna go I'm going to try sucking
on your lost Mary up my pipe, lo and behold
he starts seeing heaven because fucking saying translucent colors fucking
popping everywhere, and now they're going to be just a
bunch of tripped out fucking kids around them.
Speaker 2: You know, even even in its most innocent form where
it is just pure oxygen to help you clear your
head or whatever, I can see booths down in the
electric picnics of this world where you get in the morning,
you're hung over the bits and you're like, you're coming
to see Paddy Casey. No I can't. I can't fucking
handle it, lads, And going over to the arch tent
to get get to chug ghostbusters, slim up my hole
so that I can face the day with a bit
of dignity.
Speaker 3: It may pop up, but you know, or it will
pop up. It'll pop up in LA, It'll pop up
in like fucking Fort Lauderdale, you know what I mean,
these places where they just have you know these places
we can win for an ivy of fucking visimins. There's
literally ivy shops where you can just go in and
sit down and fucking read the newspaper and then plug
in an iv of vitamins. You're like, yeah, I don't
think you need. In fact, ninety of what you're putting
into is not going to have any use to. That's
where we're just going to piss it straight out. But
because your body only has so much absorbtion during the day,
but I think your whole apparently this is the thing.
That's where I think. Then the next bit craises and
maybe we should probably start cleaning some investment, possibly in
no time.
Speaker 2: I lost all my money on a fucking milkshake shop
in the two thousand and eight.
Speaker 3: We don't hey, listen, I'm on the same boat. I
opened ten don up chops all beside each other. It
didn't work out, but look, it wasn't my money to lose.
We just fucking throw a net out there. We'll catch somebody.
Speaker 2: I just who would have thought selling mashed up kinder
Buenos in a milkshake for seven euros wasn't going to win?
Speaker 3: Yeah, but you were smart enough at in fairness, do
you put a protein fucking you know, a scoop of
protein in there as well to make.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, called it a protein kind of care here listen, well, listen,
we wish to find doctor all the best in the
future endeavors in the research of but breathing actually a
lot more useful than I thought. I thought it was
going to be one of these sort of salute the sun, show.
Speaker 3: Your ship things that sun, that that sun, yoga, think
for your whole like that has obviously that has gone wrong.
And more, lads, I mean, if there's one place to
get sunburned, fucking hell, but yes.
Speaker 2: Taking that's someone taking the mickey. It's like what I
get these lads. You show the absolute bare hours of
your whole that has never seen sunlight in its life.
Show it the midday soun for forty five minutes there in.
Speaker 3: Arizona, because I guarantee you that it's a cult for sure,
whatever that is. And the fellow run that is trying
to write all your wives.
Speaker 2: Just so there you go. Well, we'll we'll, we'll, we'll
talk about that lad some other day perhaps, but for now,
let's move on. Not to that lad, Tom he'll get
his day in the sun. Literally, I want to research,
like I come back about the whole thing. But best,
thank you very much doctor for for for the for
the boat full of liquid. Thank you kindly. You nearly
made this lad this week. But then this lad squeezed in.
We very nearly got him in last week's episode and
he missed it that much, Tom, But we're going to
give him his day in the sun today. It's time
to talk about this week's this Lade.
Speaker 1: Now there's that guy.
Speaker 3: Thank you to the seven different set. I'm just counting
the seven different people that sent that into me.
Speaker 2: Of course it was. It was a big one.
Speaker 3: This is a big one because it's just God is lovely,
isn't it. This is a reeling in the year. This
has got really in the years written all.
Speaker 2: Over, this has this has Joe Duffy if he was
still in action, written all over going over the County
Claire for this week's this Lad. And if I may could,
I could? I could? I give up my best.
Speaker 3: What it is everything?
Speaker 2: Okay, jar and being and being the MGM Lion, which
you know was a line from Dublin Zoo Not for
nothing as well.
Speaker 3: Pat Kenny was his keeper Kenny was Pat Kenny's father
was his keeper. N Sorry, I thought you were having
an attack there. I was going to press pause and
so you're doing the lion going.
Speaker 2: Right, No, you were thinking the vaulter all had and
kicked in here.
Speaker 3: That's not the fucking vitamin hatred drinking is.
Speaker 2: Kick more of the vultron than the vaulter. All of
this fucking statement here, Okay, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.
There was a lion spott County.
Speaker 3: Clare away from Clear to the dear yeah everything.
Speaker 2: A lion like creature spotted in the woods in County Clare.
They don't say whereabouts and County Claire just the woods.
Speaker 3: So I guess, well, it's got to be close to
kill Aloo border, which would be the Tipperary Clear border.
It's got to be close to there because it was
the Guards Special Branch, Special Unit from the The Guards
were out from kill Aloo when they came apast upon
this fucking because there was numerous sightings.
Speaker 2: Apparently numerous sightings all a lion.
Speaker 3: Now I first saw this, first saw this and shout
out to the couple of good lads. They have a
great podcast called Monster Fuzz. There are two Wexford chaps
and they have this brilliant and it's all about every
week and do a lot of talking about Mickey's and flutes,
not too too un similar like myself and all good podcasts.
That's where they end up. But I saw the lads
post this note. W TF, what are we looking at you?
Speaker 2: What the fuck your lads? So we're gonna we're gonna
cut it. We're gonna spoiler a layert here. Now we're
gonna spoil who this lad was. We thought he was
a lion roaming around in County Claire. Come to find
out after the guards were got in on this Tom Brilliant,
that the lion, in actual fact, was a Newfoundland dog.
Now they're big guys, I will say, a Newfoundland dog
called Mouse. He's a big dog with a little name
which no noes. I love that set perfect who had
recently gotten a haircut. I love it.
Speaker 3: That takes bravery. We we we shaved the mohawk into
the dog here because we keep her hair tight. And anyway,
but the mother or the mother, the mother of my child,
my wife said, let's do a mohawk. That's a great idea.
Let's do a mohawk. So she she shaved them up
with mohawking. The dogs stayed lovelynk clean, but the mohawks
itself was just covered in shit heads pointing out the
reason why we keep the dog's hair fucking tight. Yes,
that was short lived.
Speaker 2: It's easier to wash well Moses mouse's owners, it must
be said. Here's the thing, Tom, It wasn't a haircut
that accidentally made him look like a lion. No, like
to be fair, they fucking made him look like.
Speaker 3: They went first. They absolutely went first.
Speaker 2: What they did was they shaved mouses and and then
you found them. Would be a big imagine if if
if a dog was a human he wore a jumper
and trousers and he just had like his neck and
head sticking at the top of the of the of
the of the neck of the jumper.
Speaker 3: I was just gonna say, if he was a human
but just had only a jumper on and nude from
the way from the way it's back.
Speaker 2: So if you imagine what you what you could see
of the dog if he was wearing a jumper, so
just really like his neck and head. They left all
that long and shaved everything else.
Speaker 3: They tough on his tail and they gave the two
furry that they give the furry falls as well.
Speaker 2: They left furry pause from and they left a big
tuft on his on his tail like a I don't
know what you call it on a lion, like a ball,
like a ball at the end of his tail, a
little ankle of saur's ball. Now you have to think, Tom,
you have to think that they did this for Halloween,
because this was first reported on the second or tour
of November.
Speaker 3: There you go.
Speaker 2: Yeah, so it sounds to me like they did the
dog up for Halloween. Nothing I wouldn't do myself if
I had a dog like that, so that they really
made the dog look, I swear to God like the
cowardly lion.
Speaker 3: I'm going to send you on. I'm going to send
you on so you can share it on the socials
like it trots off, but you can't pick out what
it is like?
Speaker 2: Is that a fucking hard I had a glance Tom
and I and I seen the video after I knew
it was it was a dog and all that, and
I'm gonna you know, initially, I'm like, head of these
fucking dumbass lads over and Claire mistaken dog for a lion.
Fuck's sick. And then you see the video and you're like, yeah,
more lion than dogs.
Speaker 3: So he is like the picture with the guard that
doesn't do it justice. No, that dog is much bigger
than that. Or he's a fucking giant of a cop,
but that dog is much bigger. Like the neighbors over
the road have two of these things, and they're just
there're two green animals. They're big grizzly bears. They're lovely things,
but man, they just nozzling in your nuts and kick
you in the whole. Like they're just there's a lot
of dog. But normally Newfoundlands, I thought we're black and
yet black and white and brownie, but this fell is
all brown.
Speaker 2: What is I think you're thinking of Bernie Ermese, Ernes,
Bermes Higgins dogs.
Speaker 3: Yes, that's what I was thinking of. No, right, okay,
so these.
Speaker 2: These New Foundlands are big like them.
Speaker 3: But he like he is the perfect coloring for a lion,
do you know what I mean? And you see him
trotting off in the video, You're like, weapon like, he's
a big square back on him, He's got a big
fuzzy head. I'm like, this is mental because we you've
not to reference it against. It's not like he's running
beside you know, a fucking a Kiev fucking sorrental, you
know what I mean.
Speaker 2: He's kind of pringles in his mouth for scale exactly.
Speaker 3: He's running through a shaggy bit of forest to not
even you're kind of go what bit of forest like
a place that has had some really recently trailed felt trees.
Speaker 2: And to be fair to he is dragging the carcass
of a gazelle in his mouth. Well there's that, Yeah,
there's that, you know, to be forgiven for thinking that
he's lionish, you know, you.
Speaker 3: Gotta of course the wild gazelle that a.
Speaker 2: Clear yeah yeah yeah, Actually closer inspection, the gazelle was
a squirrel.
Speaker 3: It reminds me of father Tad, Like, you know, they
should they should have dragged this out way longer. But
I'm so glad, I gotta tell you, I'm so glad
somebody did this.
Speaker 2: Like if I was the guards that were called to
check up on this so called lion, and I were
to find that this so called lion, who come to
find out he's got a collar and a micro chip
and he's a dog. I have said nothing.
Speaker 3: Wonder I'd been like, you know what, actually, do you
know what?
Speaker 2: Think you you could be right? This is a lion.
It's a bit seeing it. It's a lion. It's huge
bit of.
Speaker 3: Banter, you know what I mean. I cut my own
arm and everything.
Speaker 2: But it gets me excited for the notions of thjacket.
Speaker 3: And yeah, yeah, yeah, I guess me excited for the
notions of things that because Ireland. I got quizzy the
other day by a Brazilian chap that I know, he
lives locally, and he was he goes, Saint Patrick, I
need to ask about Saint Patrick went Okay, Saint Patrick,
he goes he is he bye bye the sneaks. These
the exact words, fucking I'm looking at going Have you
had a fucking stroke? What's wrong with you? Good? He
bye bye the sneaks. Oh oh, Saint Patrick got rid
of the snakes. Well, it's a metaphor for Christianity versus
he did lost him both. And then I think playing
because he was no crocodileos as fuck all crocodilos No
and the Konda I said none, no, I said no,
fucking no, Canda, no sneaks, no fucking crocodilos. How about yaguaraes,
I'm like a fucking no yaguaras we have nettles and wasps. Well,
I'm so glad that somebody rocked up with their new
Foundland as a fucking as a lion, because I came
across what can only be described as a damn near
fucking cryptid coming home from Castle Bard the other night
and I put it up. It's one of the most
viral things I've ever put up. Jer It hit one
hundred and fifty thousand views in like ten hours. It
was a video of me just rounding a corner and
there's a ten pointer fucking looking back and be like,
I'm a prick buddy. Yeah he was a serious specimen,
wasn't he.
Speaker 2: I'll tell you I spotted some I spotted what could
have been mistaken for a cryptid today. No walk up
the canal, because.
Speaker 3: There's a few fucking cryptis lining around the canal and
fucking dublin jar.
Speaker 2: What it was was as walking up the canal, which
is kind of it was kind of misty because it
was a cold, little bastard of an evening and I
was mad sore anyway, because I was after walking eight
kilometers because the fucking train didn't land, Oh Jesus. And
there was the lights of the car parked in the
distance that was casting a shadow of some trees against
the mist that was in front of me. So you
can see that projection, right, And it looked like a
long armed, long air, long legged figure dancing in the
midst in front that.
Speaker 3: Mister Sarnhead and one of these fellas.
Speaker 2: Are like one of these boys. And I can see
if I was like a primitive you know I know
them from but you know, more primitive dude. Seeing that
kind of thing dance around in the half light, I
would say, there's fucking creatures in these woods. With doubt
there's creatures in these woods.
Speaker 3: And you come stay here for a night.
Speaker 2: I'll actually send you the image of it. I took
a two. Yeah, so convinced was it?
Speaker 3: You come stay here for a night. There, And you
can see how people came up with all sorts of yeah,
you don't have to, you don't have to, Like if
I didn't round the bend with you know, modern fucking
motorized headlights, this monster with he is halfway up on
the ditch with like a fucking set of windy go
fucking handlebar is hanging off him. You're you know what
I mean, You're gonna get a fucking fright like and
you're gonna go I tried to crop up two seconds.
Ah lot, what did you crap it? All?
Speaker 2: Crap it in?
Speaker 3: I'm sure I get it one second. Okay, this is
verifying for the people.
Speaker 2: Marked up for there. Do you see what you see?
Speaker 3: What I was saying, I totally see it. I totally
see it. In one way. It kind of looks like
a long legged camel. But now I'm kind of saying, yeah,
I can see what you're.
Speaker 2: Ground beside it Jesus.
Speaker 3: Yeah, And I mean with a little less modern lighting
around that.
Speaker 2: You could have been like from a given fire or something.
Speaker 3: Yeah, you can be forgiven for pissing your pants. And
you can see how people down through the years, like
small of It is mad for these things. He's got
a whole spier book about the spider with chronicles and
it's got every sort of a fuck it and he
wants to go hunting them all now, and like, I'll
be honest with yeah, I kind of don't want to
find the thing look about them, because everyone of these best.
Theirs are terrifying looking.
Speaker 2: There's believe there's too many of them, are harbingers a
good look to them.
Speaker 3: Oh there's well, there's there's there's a nick seed that
apparently lives in our river here beside us. But it's okay.
They lure the odd person in, but it's more out incausive,
been inquisitive, rather than.
Speaker 2: I want to murder you, but onely U of potholes, buddy, Yeah, yeah, yeah,
this is there. You go. So so we can see how,
you know, people from years upon years ago could look
at the shadows dancing in the flames and see cryptids
and whatnot. And we can definitely see how the people
of County Claire could look through the woods and see
a dog that had had a haircut to purposefully look
like a lion, and through the grainy zoom of an
iPhone from two fields across look at it and say
it themselves, is that a lion? I'm not mad at them.
I think they're within the rights.
Speaker 3: There here's the question I have. And I always like
to look at the backstory of a thing. Right, So
if let's just for arguments, say this is owned by
a couple, this dog because if that's a dude just
by himself, he's doing it. Whose decision do you think
it was to get the groomer, Because that's a groomer
did it. That's a good job. Oh that's the man,
and and she went along with it for what he's Yeah, okay, yeah, yea, yeah, yeah, yeah.
Speaker 2: I don't I don't need to. I don't need to
second guess that conversation, that conversation several times. Will we
do this, you know, we'll we'll, we'll xyza, we'll have
we'll have our plates into the front of the house
and make it look like he's or Halloween. Like I've
had all these conversations.
Speaker 3: Okay, it's just like yeah, yeah, yeah, okay, we'll put
your tiding it up. Yes, I wanted I just wanted
you to clear clear that up for me. We need
to so shout out to miss Moss, the groomer who
did an unreal job. It's class.
Speaker 2: Yeah. Let us let us know your name in the
comments and we'll we'll throw your free plug on the
show were I don't know what the how filtered down
it is For the listeners of the Tom and Jerry Show,
who also owned Massive Dogs in the clear area that lions.
You never know you might get one or two sales
out of it. Ah, there you go, there you go,
lions and tigers and bears. Oh my, Tom famous rhyme
from the Lion, the Witch and the wardrobe or need
a bigger part of the Wizard was getting the lions
and the witches and wardrobe and somebody of this vaulter
all the time. That's all I'm going to say it.
Speaker 3: Small, but a little quiz quisandomics there for you. The
lions may are the lion's costume in the original Wizard
of Oz, made from a fucking lion. Stink to high heaven.
Apparently made from a real lion pre cgi baby. Do
you want to know what the snow was in the
Wizard of Oz? Go on asbestos?
Speaker 2: Of course authentic. But that was then, Tom. Look, that's
just what they did. About these days they do it
all in c g I and it look like shit.
But back then they knew what we're doing. But that's
the old days of making the Wizard of Oz. This
is the new days of making Wicked. You know, a
lot has gone on in that time, and I dare
say like we've seen quite a bit of it because
we've been on this goddamn rock for forty five years. Tom,
We've seen old ways die and new ways come to be.
We exist the full come of life, and we look
back and on the final segment of the Tom and
Jerry Show called we remember when when I was a
young lad twenty or thirty or forty years ago.
Speaker 3: I remember when those interests were shorter, for sure.
Speaker 2: I remember when my shoulder didn't hurt from walking. Yeah.
But Tom, this is an interesting one for we remember
when because this is not a thing that we lived through,
but this was a but this was this was a
viral video before such a thing exact Yeah, yeah, yeah,
And it was a thing that happened in nineteen seventy,
making this the fifty fifth anniversary of it. The fifty
fifth anniversary of this event takes place as you find
folks listen to this podcast, and we thought that's a
good enough reason to tell this story real quick, because,
like I said, this was like a viral video before
viral videos were viral videos. Even when we were small, Tom,
like you would see this every couple of years on
t oh yeah, like part of the clip show or
part of a Mike Murphy would.
Speaker 3: Show what it would man. It even came up in
like nature shows and stuff like that, like or just
guess things about the mad bastard Americans and the things.
Speaker 2: That mad bastard Americans. Tom, I want you to take
the people through the story of the Oregon Whale.
Speaker 3: So it was the state of Oregon, but it was
he is like she was known as the Florence Way
because the beach with Florence in Oregon, if you had
a worship, if you had washed up on Dolly Mount,
he be called Dolly Mount Whale. That's just what we're
doing here and have ever bid the Americans would ever
find and you know, a name of a place original
rather than just naming it New Florence or you know.
But anyway, this this thing, he was a forty five
back in November nineteen, nineteen seventy forty five foot long
or as fourteen meters for anywhere you know sticklers from
metric a sperm whale washed the shore of Florence and
the central Oregon coast. The way to this carcass as
it lay, was an estimated eight tonre eight tons as
American tons or seven three hundred cages.
Speaker 2: I gotta tell you, Tom though, just one, like, you know,
here's before we get into I'm not going to derail it,
but the sperm whales. I hate to be a child
about this. I always thought that there was some rhythm
or rhyme to that that wasn't just as obvious as
it is, but in actual fact, that one particular whale.
Whales were whaled in whaling boats and moby dick and
all this kind of thing for the oils and the
fats in their heads which was used for like perfumes
and lamps and all this kind of shit. Yeah, this
is what we wiped out species for here. And then
they fell across this whole new whale which had way
more fluid in his head than any of the rest
of them. This was like, this was like catching three
wheales at once, and that was a sperm whale. They
cut him open and all this fucking fluid looked out
and somebody said, hey, you know what that looks like. Geez,
And that's why the fucking sperm whale. That's it. That's
as simple as it is. There, you go, what was
the juice? It's there's a name.
Speaker 3: Liquid Blubber, because I've seen him booet it out.
Speaker 2: Of no, it's like it's not chrism either, it's that's
that's what you get that confirmation date what fluid is
in a whales head?
Speaker 3: Just as Robert F. Kennedy Junior did the strap onto
the cars one time.
Speaker 2: Spermoseti there you go for the head of a sperm
whale contains spermoseti, which is a liquid wax, and they
use it for all sorts of all sorts of good stuff.
Speaker 3: Jesus, I tell you one to think that they fair
know how to name a thing. They go, what's that stuff?
Looked like the sperm.
Speaker 2: You'll know the name of it, as I said, Yeah, general,
general whale fluid in a whale's head is ambergriss.
Speaker 3: Ah yeah, okay, okay, yeah yeah yeah, So that the
sperm whale ambergris was so at the time this at
the time, you see the beach was it was under
the jurisdiction of the highway divisions such as cars and
you know, like they were looking at the roads. Yeah, yeah,
we know, it wasn't really under you know, it wasn't
under like the marine conservationist crowd l Right, So this
fucker lands up dice. He's on the beach beached whale,
and you're going, what the fuck do we do? Like
you know, on you see this is the thing. I'd say.
He was going for rotten, and they were going, we
can't even put a chain around him, it'll just rip
through him.
Speaker 2: And I was miles out on the beach as well.
Speaker 3: I will argue that the bulldogs that they brought on
there was a two ton fucking little caterpillar that wouldn't
hardly push yourself for myself over, you're going bring on
a fucking serious man with a fucking serious dedicate, and
they have that yoking back in the water no time.
Speaker 2: But we needed, we need a solution to him to
get this damn whale off this beach before it turns
into hot sausage in front of our eyes. What can
we do? What did the fine people of the Oregon
Highway Patrol do? Well?
Speaker 3: By Jesus Christ, they rather than letting it decaying away
and rotten and feed it, I suppose all the sea
life and everything else around it, the beach goers wanted
to get back to the beach without the fucking, stinking,
fucking rotten So what else could you fucking do, but
you bring in George Thornton, an engineer, and George just
straight up said, well, there's only one that we can
do with this fella. We're gonna blow the living fuck
out of himTo high heaven. That's what we're gonna do
with some dynamite. Because nineteen seventies America was a cartoon.
Speaker 2: It was not a subtle place. It was not a
subtle place, not have the nuance that it has today.
Speaker 3: They didn't. And even George was like, well, you know,
I specialized in dynamite for a long time, but he didn't.
Like he was a military veteran. So George, let's just
say he'd blown up a few things in his life.
But I'm guessing at no point did he ever had
to be put He didn't try and break the fucker up, like,
let's drill him, put him in a few bucks.
Speaker 2: Right, cut him up, let's drop no chunks.
Speaker 3: They didn't. They just split him open in one spotcher
and wait for this. They took just short of a
half ton, a half ton of dynamite, Like one stick
of dynamite would blow up a car.
Speaker 2: So like if you can get a half ton of
dynamite onto a beach. Then you can take a whale
off and half ton chunks. Yeah, yeah, it's just gonna
take it a little bit longer. The theory behind blowing
up the whale, and I can hear a lot of
listeners kind of going like, oh fuck, yeah, I've seen this.
I think, yes, I seen something like this. The theory
would be that when you obliterate the whale into a
thousand pieces, that it would be in small enough chunks
that seagulls and whatnot, which were already picking away at
the whale it was just kid. They would just say, oh,
thank you, you blew him in a rice crispies, and
now we'll just peck away with them, and crabs will
carry him into the sea.
Speaker 3: I'm guessing that's what George is going. Will vaporize the
full vaporize him. But being I guess the makeup of
a whale is right up there with fu is better
than concrete. It absorbed it brilliantly, to the point that
it didn't vaporize him. In fact, it didn't vaporize an
awful lot of them. But what it did fucking blow
up into the air jar we're talking. I'm just going
to go from the view here, I'm gonna say, eighty
foot in the air. It blew a combination of sand
and fucking.
Speaker 2: The King and Ambergriss come come to find.
Speaker 3: Out, Yeah, fucking just missed through the air. But also
I'm just gonna I'm actually gonna read it here as
they wrote it. Your man's you can tell your man's
right right in this a roar in his whole laughing
the explosion. So this they blew him up. The three
days of looking at this fucker, they're going, what are
we gonna do with him? They blew him up. On
the twelfth right, the explosion.
Speaker 2: Caused verree as this podcast lands exactly so.
Speaker 3: The explosion caused large pieces of blubber to lend their
buildings and parking lots and distances away from the beach.
Only some of the whale was disintegrated. Most of it
remained on the beach and for the Oregon Highway Division
workers to clear away anyway. In his report, George or Lindman,
sorry he was in Another fellow was over the over,
sorry he was the one of the new reporters. Also,
note of the scavenger birds who had been hoped would
eat the remains of the carcass abjects, Butsion did not
appear as they were possibly scared away from the fucking noise.
Speaker 2: Like there's a lot to unpack here, Tom. So, So
here's the thing that we need to there's a reason
we're talking about this fifty five years later, and like
this isn't such some hushed up, dreadful secret of the
Flooringe Beach community. The reason why we know about this, Tom,
is because it was filmed for TV. This was must
see television. This was this must see event in the area.
People came from towns around. Do you hear they're gonna
blow up?
Speaker 3: You go yourself, though, you yourself.
Speaker 2: We talked about this when we talked about evil canievel
to momentivit people to leave their houses at this time.
And if you said, look, we're gonna go blow up
a whale on the beach, you might leave your house
to go see that.
Speaker 3: Fucking sandwiches A Hi, get the fucking family in the car.
Speaker 2: We're offets. This is going to be a banner day.
And the beach was lined with hundreds, if not thousands,
of people in their cars there to see this beat
this whale explode. TV news cameras rolling tick tick boom,
and then there was a towering colume of fire and
whale ship and what goes up tom as you said, there,
buddy must come down, and it started to rain rotted
quail flesh. Well, and here's the thing, hundreds of spectators.
Speaker 3: Because there wasn't the immediate social media for around the
world and exactly what had happened a lot of the
world apparently, and this can happen, but not to that
fucking extent. People just thought it was sitting there rotten
and it blew up like a balloon, like it just burst,
you know what I mean, because yeah, that it was.
It was.
Speaker 2: It was some ghoulish sort of like it just blew
up with.
Speaker 3: The gases inside it and all the restord to just
do that. Well, I've seen I saw a way. Let's see.
Anybody goes searcher. It's amazing. There's a bird pecking at
it and it's as big as a like it's welled
up like a balloon and there's a bird pecking. Is
one of the best things if you can go find it,
a bird pecking, it just it just bursts. The bird
bird gets fucking obliterated. It's amazing. But people thought that
that's what it was, but it clearly wasn't like but
they were. They used to the ordinary, like even like
back into the twenties and stuff. They just used to
to away into the fucking thing with a tractor. But
for whatever reason, I think you're right. I think they went, oh,
leave the director at home. We've got a Vietnam has
just ended. We've still got a load of fucking dynamite
left over.
Speaker 2: Let's do it.
Speaker 3: Let's fucking blow it. A load of people come out
in the class. So apparently it blew. It blew the
whale flesh around eight hundred feet away. That's two hundred
forty meters for anybody wondering eight hundred feet one chunk
about the size of your torso jar landing on the
fellows what looks like a very nice Lincoln. And I
say it made clean shit of it, like the insurance
they called the insurance company must be a wild one
that day. I mean, fucked right it off. Carl fucking
chassis bent and every and this thing just came down
like a fucking television thrown off a fucking fifty. He
just makes clean, apparently to high heaven, the whole place
and everybody in the area fucking smelt for Ford because
you're getting that that did you get the shtank on
you that missed, that oily missed off, that.
Speaker 2: Oily missed is just settling on you and yours.
Speaker 3: Just rolled up driving home. You imagine your man driving
home with his head out the window. He's fucked up,
thinking like just a big chunk of fucking whale still
sitting there going and none of the family will talk
to each other. I don't ever mention this again. Nobody'll
ever hear of this.
Speaker 2: It's fine.
Speaker 3: It's fucking amaze, and.
Speaker 2: It's so incredible because if you watch the footage of it,
and again, all of this was filmed for TV, so
you can literally watch this as it happened. Uh, it's
a big boom, the whil explodes, and you can hear like,
here's the thing, Tom, How people weren't killed by this,
I'll never know because you can hear children and adolescents
and moms and dads and the whole art and they're
like yeah, And then all you hear is like and
it all just goes and they're screaming and running and
kids crying and glass smashing, just like like as the
bigger chunks start to land. It was unbelievable. And as
you said there, they had planned that, okay, we blow
it into small trunks and then the boards will come
and carry that away. The boards here this boom and
did an They came back the following spring.
Speaker 3: By all accounts, there was one one location where they
were actually trying to carry it back from an art
like a built up kind of He got caught up
in a kind of an urban area whereas you know,
the beachfront houses when Taiwan were built right down to
the beach. This is only two thousand and four, and
it just said, oh, we'll just scoop him up on
a set of forks and they're bringing it back. But
it hadn't really copped how much he shwelled. By all accounts,
it bursts of natural gas built up inside an urban area.
Can you imagine you imagine you're going over to visit
your MAT's house, like whatever, you know, this as a
confirmation party or something going on. You're on your best
and you land over You're like, well, okay, I just
ship my pants by the smell of the fucking area
around here, don't you ring the fucking doorbell. We're going
We're never coming back here ever again. If this is
what this part of town smells like.
Speaker 2: Oh I got to a happy end to the story
because the people of Florence, Oregon, if nothing else, they
were good sports about it all. They named the park
after the event. There's a park called Exploding Whale Memorial Park.
Not fucking around here, buddy, there's there's Exploding Whale Memorial Park,
which which which which is not? It's not like a
park with like slides and ship like that, and there's
like slide down the whale tail or ant like that.
It's just like a park where you can walk your dog,
but it is Exploding Whale Memorial Park. And there's a
little whale mascot that descend out in like a football,
a little blue whale mascot that they come out and
wave a kids and ship like this.
Speaker 3: That's a door. Well you know what fair Fox like
one thing you'll give the Americans when it comes seven
hundred out festival or like you know, a themed weekend
like I was this in somebody on the podcast day.
They're from a place that's famous for the couter turtle,
but they've leaned into the thing that it's called couter,
you know, so that everything is like couter fest, coot tober,
couter tober and stuff like that. Come get your couter out,
Come look at that cooter. You get your fuzzy cootter
ready to go.
Speaker 2: But but there you go the exploding. Well, we will,
needless to say, Tom be sharing that on our social
media happenings for people that have not had the pleasure
of watching it to have a look. Oh and and
and see what they would have done had they been
standing in Florence, Oregon while ham sized chunks of smelly
sand covered quail flesh smashed into your Lincoln Continental. Ah.
And then we will of course share that on the
social media channels, which are at Tom and Jerry show
Jerry with g You'll get us on Instagram and Twitter.
You'll find my good self to got my fucking name,
you'll tell me Jerry McBride at Jerry McBride over on
Blue Sky and Tom o'many's haunt of choice is that
Tom o'many no e and that o'many over on Listagram.
What else?
Speaker 1: What we like this?
Speaker 2: Find people?
Speaker 3: Do Tom tell us? Tell us because you can comment
on Spotify now because of course, bry now you will
have hit the subscribe and the alert button, which is
the little the little We don't need to tell you
you got it done, the little bell, the little bell.
And while you're there as well, give us the five
stars because we're rocking at a shiny five stars. But
you can comment under every episode, so please do. When
it comes to do you remember the whale? Did you
see the fucking the the lion wandering around clear? By
any chance? Did you ever shave your own cat's body
to make her look like? I don't know, Peppi lepew,
let us know. Have you ever chanced your arm as
trying to breathe through your whole? Is there some special
place you can breathe through? I've seen people squirt milk
out of their eyes their tear ducks. I've see that
I have no ad noights. They took my ad noids
out there so I can drink straight up my nose
if I want.
Speaker 2: What did you get?
Speaker 3: You're adding a breathing because breathing early doors they were
like and says your man, I've broken my nose like
seven times, so I can't actually breathe. That's one nostrial now.
But i'd be couldn't what it was. I was getting
ear ear infections as a result of it too, because
it was so closed in. So they went, let's cut
thems out. There no use to them at all.
Speaker 2: Tall You're like, you're like, you're like the admiral in
hot Shots. It's like, yeah, I got my ear shut
and a great reference.
Speaker 3: Just put.
Speaker 2: But but yes, that's it. That's all I want these
people to do. Quite frankly, that's it.
Speaker 3: There is a comment. There is a comment. And I
know because people think I won't comment er, Sure, look
at do comment away while you're sitting there now at
work or whatever. Just comment away because you can't. And Mac,
I think he commented, commented before. I do love Halloween tails,
even I don't believe in any of it, probably from
using the graveyard beside my nana's house as a playground.
Speaker 2: There you go, there you go.
Speaker 3: I was a young life, fairly desensitized it all, as
in from age six running along the top of six
foot wall pretending it was a train. Yeah don't.
Speaker 2: I'll tell you one thing I want to do is
run along that. But if I can't run along a train,
rif I'll run along your your wall, Tom, Shall we
wrap it up with that?
Speaker 3: Let's let's let's hit the bricks chair. I'm delighted with
my pot pot holes this evening. You look like a
man who needs to lie down with an IVY up
your hole.
Speaker 2: Hind Tom, you're you're a filling potle good I look
on take care off