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Speaker 1: Hello, I'm welcomed stories all the time. Glad you are here.

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Let's get into it. When I was twenty two, so

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it seems like a lifetime ago now, I landed myself

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a security job a steel plant here in Pennsylvania. It

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was a pretty easy gig for the most part, but

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there were a lot of overnight shifts, and depending on

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who you were working with, those shifts could either suck

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or be a whole lot of fun. I've been working

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there for about a year, with the same team the

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whole time, when one day one of the senior guys

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announced that he was throwing in the towel. He was

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moving someplace else to be closer to his family, so

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naturally the boss needed to replace him. We all hoped

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the replacement would be a good guide and a decent worker,

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but what we got was a guy named Parker. A

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decent worker, he seemed to have all the personality traits

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of a serial killer. We first met Poker on day's ships,

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because you had to complete a probation period before you

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were allowed to work nights. He was about six feet

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all with dark eyes, close crop, dark hair, and a

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rough beard. He also had a weird scar on the

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right side of his neck, like where a patch of

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skin was paler pinker China than the rest. Then whenever

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he took his gloves off, you could see that he

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had the same patches of deep pink scar tissue on

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the outside of his fingers, like near his knuckles. We

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figured that he'd been in some kind of accident, like

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a bad car wreck or something, but since it's not

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polite to bring the kind of stuff up, no one

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ever asked him. But then it wasn't Parker Scurs that

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freaked us out. It was the way he acted. He

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was quiet, real quiet, and whenever he speak it was

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like English was a second language to him. He had

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a distinct northeastern Pennsylvania accent, and by that I mean

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like Scranton, Wilke's Bar and the Poconos, that kind of area.

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But then when he spoke, it was like he was

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frightening over every little syllable. He talk talk like this,

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as if stressing over every little word. He'd get real

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jumpy sometimes too, like a skittish horse. He wouldn't scream

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and dive under the table anytime he heard a loud noise,

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And we guarded a steel plants so in the daytimes

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there were many, but he could see him softly flinch

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or spin his head around anytime something took him by surprise.

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The guy seemed like a turtle bowl of nerves, and

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the fellows even jerked that he might kill a man

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if he snuck up on him and spooped him back.

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But then at the same time, he was a good worker,

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so while we remained fairly cautious, we eventually accepted him

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as one of us. About six months into Parker working

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with us, I found out that I'd be working with

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him for a whole weeks worth of night shifts, just me,

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him and the supervisor. Needless to say, I was not

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looking forward to the Arsia would be in a security

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office watching Thomas and stuffing his face with letter pies,

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but it would be up to me and Papa to

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patrol the grounds of the punt onfit. And like I

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said before, the few were with the right crew, knights

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could be a dizzy. You'd walk around talking about the

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birds or the fliers, just shooed in the breeze and

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all of that. And then with Patha, I got the

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feeling that the conversation wasn't exactly going to flow and

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the idea of walking around at night with the button,

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and so I could felt more of a wristlin chase

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in junkies off the side. All in all, it came

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down to do options work. The ships will lose out unpaid,

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and so I worked them. My wisher could say working

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those knights with Papa was like a Buddy Coop movie

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or something of the nature, that we slowly warmed up

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to one another and we've been pals ever since. But

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that was not the case. Whenever Parker was sitting in

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total silence, staring off into space like he was watching

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a movie no one else could see, he'd be muttering

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to himself. He'd mostly only do it when he thought

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no one was a round, but I caught him doing

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it once or twice, and when I did, he sounded

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like he was real angry about something, and that's what

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God is all thinking. He really was some kind of

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ticking time bomb, a kind of guy to just snap

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one day and go totally postal. Naturally, no one wanted

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to be around him, and he did. And when I

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said that, they tried to cozy up to him a

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little so that he might just skip over shooting me.

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When he finally did bring a gun to work. I'm

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really only half joking with you. The second night shift

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we worked together, we were walking around the plant's perimit

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defense when I decided to ask Parker what he did

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before security, and he didn't tell me much, but he

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did mention having worked for a company that didn't have

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his back after he got hurt, so he moved on

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and that's how he ended up working security. I told

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him he should just lawyer upon that he could probably

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win millions if it was some kind of industrial extent,

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but he told me it wasn't like that, and that

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the best thing he could have done is just move on.

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Whatever it was. From the way Parker talked about it,

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it sounded bad, and with me not being a total jerk,

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I asked him nothing more about it and changed the

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subject as quickly as I could. Parker didn't follow any sports,

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He wasn't into moves like me and some of the

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other guys there, and he didn't drink, he didn't smoke,

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and he didn't have any wife or a kid for girlfriend.

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And it got to the point where I asked him

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what the hell do you do when you're not at work?

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And he told me he either worked out, worked on

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his car, or read books. I asked him what kind

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of books he read, and he started talking about a

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bunch of old Russian guys whose names I can't even

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pretend to remember or spell. I've never been much of

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a reader, and the last thing I read was had

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Finn back in high school. But Parker didn't strike me

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as much of a reader EI though, so to hear

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him talking all fancy like that, it was kind of surprising.

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He finally managed to find a topic of mutual interests

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and automobiles, and after Parker told me that he had

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a two thousand and six Pontjact GETO, that was all

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we talked about for the rest of the shift. It

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was the most conversation any of us had ever heard

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with him, and to me, it was a sign he

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wasn't going to show up in a hockey mask one

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day and start shopping us all up with a machete.

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That's what I told my supervisor too, when he asked

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how working with Parker had become the end of the shift,

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I really did everything I've been told about Parker getting

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out at the previous job, and how in spite of

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him not giving me much detail, I felt I had

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a rough idea of what had happened. I said, I

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no doubt whatsoever that Parker had a messed up pass,

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but that I figured that he was way more of

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a threat to his former associates than he was to us.

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And it turns out I was right about that in

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ways that I could never imagine. On the fourth of

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what was supposed to be five nights ships together, Parker

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and I stopped by the guard chat by the main

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entrance for some coffee. It must have been around one

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thirty in the morning. It had been a real quiet night,

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and I planned on working my way through a bag

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of those many podded doughnuts before we got back on

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our feet again. I was sitting at the little desk

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where we kept the log book, reading through a copy

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of the previous day's papers someone had left behind, while

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Parker was standing by the shack's window, staring out into

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the darkness and muttering to himself. Forty eight hours before,

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i'd have found that kind of behavior creepy, but it's

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amazing how quickly you get used to person's corks. After

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working a couple of twelve I r night shifts with them,

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he could stare off into space, mottered himself a little,

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and I didn't think it was normal by any stretch.

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But it didn't freak me out as much as it

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did when I first met him. But what did freak

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me out was when out of nowhere, Parker told me

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there's something coming up the road. We never got any

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one coming up that road at night, not unless it

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was someone from security, but they always called ahead. But

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what was even stranger was when I looked up and

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saw absolutely nothing on the road outside the shack. Now

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keeping in mind that I'm looking for headlights, so when

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I don't see any, I'm assuming that there's nothing. I

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also kind of assumed that I don't know Parker was

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just being a little overzealous. On account of how jumpy

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he always was. It wouldn't be the first time that

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he acted like that. I made a mountain out of

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a moleel, but the boss liked it and said that

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we should all act a little bit more like that.

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And so I look up see nothing, and I respond,

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are you sure, buddy, because I don't see nothing at there.

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Parker then says something in response, they got head let's

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switched off. But there's something there, all right? And then

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no sooner had he said that. When the headlights of

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what looked like a truck or a van switched on

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so bright that it was almost blinding. I was halfway

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through yelling at something just like who the hell are

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those guys? When Parker turned and with this real angry

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look on his face, he comes lunging across the shack

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at me. I backed up, asking what the hell he

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was thinking, but he didn't stop. He ran, lowered his

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body like some football player about to tackle me in lamb.

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He took me down so hard at knock the wind

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out of me, and even though I was fighting for

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my life, I didn't stand a chance of overpowering him.

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I had flashes of thoughts running through my mind, stuff

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about it inside job, about how Parker was a plant,

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and that he was about to kill me to keep

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me quiet. Hell knows where heister Tea would want from

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a steel plant. But I guess I wasn't thinking straight

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at the time. This also took place over the space

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of a couple of seconds too. Like the lights came on,

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Pocker turned and tackled me. Then I'm right about to yell,

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what are you doing. When the whole godumbshack exploded in

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a shower of glass and sparks, I could hear automatic weapons,

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maybe half a dozen of them, all slinging lead at

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the shack, the sort of doka doca, doca doca. The

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glass came in first, but after that you could hear

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ricochets and sea sparks, before a bullet hit the light

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above our heads and plunged the shack into doctors before

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showering us with even more broken blasts. Parker was on

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top of me the whole time, but obviously, but then

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I realized why he'd taken me to the ground, and

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I quit trying to struggle. He didn't want to hurt

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me very much, the opposite. In fact, the guy I

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once thought might end up going parcel on us was

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trying to save my life. The gunfire was over in

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a couple of seconds, and I know it's a huge

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cliche at this point, but it did feel like way longer.

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But then the second it went quiet, Poker rolled off

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of me and then scurried out of the shack at

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a bit of a crouching pisce position. I wanted to

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follow him, and I wanted to get up and run,

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but my legs just wouldn't let me. All I could

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think about was whatever automatic weapons they had outside, and

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how if I stood up, they put so much fleet

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in me that you could shave my head and use

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me as a pencil. I wasn't certified to carry a

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weapon yet, but Parker had shown up certified, which I

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guess is half the reason he got the job. So

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while I was on with nothing but my flask light

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and some pepper spray, he'd gone running off carrying our

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only weapon. I knew whatever a brief window I had

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to escape the shack was gone. Parker had seem to

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recognize that the guys outside were reloading and had ducked

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out of the shack before they had a chance to

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open fire again. I figured that meant I had second

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before another hel storm of bullets ripped through the shack

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and potentially meet you. But then get up and run

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and I give them something solid to aim at, and

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I'd be totally screwed, not just partially. And so I

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waited and waited, half expecting that sound to return again

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of gun fire and for my lights to go out.

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But they didn't, and the only thing I heard was

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the sound of footsteps getting closer and closer to a shack.

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Unlike I said before, I had nothing but my pepper spray,

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but I knew that I had to do something, or

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whoever was out there was going to walk inside and

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finish me off. And so I did the only thing

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I could think to do and start making a lot

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of noise. I started yelling about how if they took

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one step closer, I was going to open up with

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my shotgun, and how even though I wouldn't be able

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to take all of them out, at least one of

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them was going to die. The footsteps suddenly stopped and

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there was a moment of silence, and then I heard

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a voice. It sounded like a man who smoked exhaust

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pats and a gravel for breakfast. And when he spoke,

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he didn't sound mad or scared. He sounded almost smug, asking,

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to which I obviously responded, we didn't have anyone by

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that name working for us, so you can bet your

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assa let them know that Licky split and I told

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them there was no mackaide there, and that's who they

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were looking for. They'd risked a hundred years in prison

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for absolutely nothing because whoever that was was not here.

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There was another pause, and then the guy said something

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like I know he's there. I respect you trying to

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protect him, but it's going to get you killed, and

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a piece of shit like that isn't worth dying over.

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I had to tell him a second time that I

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had exactly zero clue what he was talking about, and

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that no one had to die because they made a

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dumb mistake. There was another pause, and I I heard

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the Jews outside sort of whispering to one another, but

259
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I couldn't make it out. Then the other guy who

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smote exhaust pipe said all right, you got to count

261
00:10:07,440 --> 00:10:09,039
a three to tell us from a kaye biszam, we're

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coming in to kill you. And after that he started

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his countdown. After Freda told him that there was no

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point in killing me, and all he said in response

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was too and that I started thinking that maybe I

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could dive out of the broken windows they started approaching,

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and then I could use the shack as cover for

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a few seconds to run off into the night. The

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guy shouted one, and I was thinking, Okay, I need

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to clear this window in one try or I'm dead,

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and then the guy shouted, all right, where And that's

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all I heard, because whatever his next word, it was

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drowned up by the sound of more gunfire. I had

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maybe nine or ten shots, and then someone screened before

275
00:10:38,519 --> 00:10:41,360
some fired again. I was so scared. I thought that

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they were just shooting up the shack again, and instead

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of actually risking sifty to get inside the shack to

278
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kill me, they were just going to empty the bullets

279
00:10:47,600 --> 00:10:49,120
into it again in the hopes that a shot went

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through and hit me. But then I very quickly realized

281
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nothing was hitting the shack. All the shooting was directed

282
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at something else outside. I knew that was my golden

283
00:10:57,679 --> 00:11:00,000
opportunity to run, But when it came to standing up again,

284
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and I knew it was just too much of a

285
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risqual lower bullets in the air, I had to say

286
00:11:04,120 --> 00:11:05,960
put wait for the shooting to stop, and then wait

287
00:11:06,000 --> 00:11:08,679
for a moment. But literally no sooner than the shooting

288
00:11:08,720 --> 00:11:11,120
did stop, I heard footsteps printing over to the shat

289
00:11:11,159 --> 00:11:13,879
before suddenly Parker was standing in front of me, pistol

290
00:11:13,919 --> 00:11:16,080
in hand, and this absolute psycho kind of look on

291
00:11:16,120 --> 00:11:18,639
his face. He barks at me, get out of here.

292
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There'll be more of them coming. I don't know what

293
00:11:20,960 --> 00:11:22,600
it was about him telling me all of that, but

294
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all of a sudden, my legs suddenly remembered how to

295
00:11:24,879 --> 00:11:28,679
work again. I didn't thank him, I didn't ask any questions.

296
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I just ran full speed towards the plant security office

297
00:11:31,679 --> 00:11:34,200
to take Shelfe there. There was a chance our super

298
00:11:34,279 --> 00:11:36,320
had seen what was happening, but there was also a

299
00:11:36,440 --> 00:11:38,320
chance that he hadn't either, So I needed to get

300
00:11:38,320 --> 00:11:40,879
their SAP to make sure the cops got their SAP too.

301
00:11:41,480 --> 00:11:43,600
And now, long story short, we watched the cameras the

302
00:11:43,639 --> 00:11:45,360
whole time till the cops do show up, but all

303
00:11:45,399 --> 00:11:46,879
we see is the shack all shut up and the

304
00:11:46,879 --> 00:11:50,919
headlights of whatever vehicle the shooters had approached him. Parker mckabe,

305
00:11:51,000 --> 00:11:53,240
whatever you want to call him, was nowhere to be found,

306
00:11:53,279 --> 00:11:55,840
nor to my knowledge, did he have a resurface. Our

307
00:11:55,879 --> 00:11:58,159
boss handed over all his paperwork to the cops, every

308
00:11:58,200 --> 00:11:59,759
last scrap that we had to go on, and they

309
00:11:59,799 --> 00:12:02,000
came back and told us all of it was false.

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The only thing that was real was Parker's face, and

311
00:12:04,960 --> 00:12:07,000
that it did match a guy named mccabees who used

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00:12:07,000 --> 00:12:09,279
to be part of some prison gown until his relationship

313
00:12:09,279 --> 00:12:12,120
with his associate Siren for some reason, and that's all

314
00:12:12,120 --> 00:12:14,159
the explanation we ever got. And as far as I know,

315
00:12:14,240 --> 00:12:16,720
Poker or MacCabe is still on the run. I don't

316
00:12:16,759 --> 00:12:18,440
know what he did to pest his guys off so much,

317
00:12:18,519 --> 00:12:20,320
but I know he made a mistake coming after him

318
00:12:20,360 --> 00:12:23,159
like that, a mistake they paid for with their lives.

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00:12:23,879 --> 00:12:25,919
My name is Father Thomas, and I've been with the

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00:12:25,919 --> 00:12:28,799
parish priesthood at Saint Nicholas's Catholic Church here in WENSCHKINMB

321
00:12:28,799 --> 00:12:31,480
for the past three and a half years. Winskim is

322
00:12:31,480 --> 00:12:34,039
a small town here in rural Gloucestershire, and about five

323
00:12:34,120 --> 00:12:36,679
thousand people are very proud to call at home. It's

324
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about as quaint a rural English town as you are

325
00:12:38,440 --> 00:12:40,919
ever likely to find, with a beautiful village, green, a

326
00:12:40,960 --> 00:12:44,159
trio of tinlessly charming pubs, and even a fifteenth century

327
00:12:44,200 --> 00:12:47,200
to Uda castle on the town's outskirts. There's nowhere on

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00:12:47,240 --> 00:12:49,919
earth I'd rather be living or serving God. But it's

329
00:12:49,919 --> 00:12:52,399
also true that Winchkim has a history steeped and strange

330
00:12:52,399 --> 00:12:56,000
and sometimes rather sinister occurrences. Visit the local museium and

331
00:12:56,039 --> 00:12:58,080
you'll be told that Winschum started life as a Roman

332
00:12:58,080 --> 00:13:00,159
hamlet around the middle of the first century, but but

333
00:13:00,240 --> 00:13:02,879
three miles to the southeast atop a place called Cleave Hill.

334
00:13:02,960 --> 00:13:05,480
Though fine traces of Neolithic burial ground the dates back

335
00:13:05,559 --> 00:13:08,960
five thousand years. The area's inhabitants would take their dead

336
00:13:08,960 --> 00:13:11,159
to a chambered lawn barrow atop the hill, which was

337
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not only a place of reverence, but also a place

338
00:13:13,360 --> 00:13:15,600
of right and ritual weather living cocommune with the dead.

339
00:13:16,240 --> 00:13:19,080
There was a focus on collective memory and kinship, emphasizing

340
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the dead as part of a community rather than isolated individuals,

341
00:13:22,039 --> 00:13:25,080
and befitting my profession, that something I find profoundly moving.

342
00:13:25,679 --> 00:13:28,519
Yet I've often wondered how much influence those ancestral spirits

343
00:13:28,559 --> 00:13:30,960
have today, or if the strange events have observed around

344
00:13:30,960 --> 00:13:33,960
Winskimba the echoes of much more recent events. In a

345
00:13:34,000 --> 00:13:37,639
sixteenth century scandal rocked a nearby monastery known as Hales Abbey.

346
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For hundreds of years, the monastery had been home to

347
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a religious relic known as the Holy Blood, which consisted

348
00:13:43,799 --> 00:13:46,600
of an ornately decorated wooden box containing a glass vial

349
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of Jesus Christ's blood Supposedly, the vile had filled with

350
00:13:49,840 --> 00:13:52,399
the blood which dripped from Christ's featuring his crucifixion, and

351
00:13:52,440 --> 00:13:54,639
had been delivered from the Holy Land by Crusading Night.

352
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Some time in the thirteenth century. The Night claimed the

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00:13:57,399 --> 00:13:58,960
relic had been given to him by the monks of

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hermitage somewhere near the dead See after defending its occupants

355
00:14:01,720 --> 00:14:05,080
against the Sarisen raid. The monks guaranteed their various souls

356
00:14:05,120 --> 00:14:07,600
and the relics authenticity, claiming it had once belonged to

357
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one of Christ's apostles. Following its interment Hailes Abbey, the

358
00:14:10,240 --> 00:14:12,639
monastery became one of the most prominent in all of England.

359
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But sometime in the sixteenth century, an inspection of the

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00:14:15,679 --> 00:14:19,320
Holy Blood uncovered something deeply shocking. The vile containing Christ's

361
00:14:19,320 --> 00:14:22,960
blood had been stolen. Following an investigation, the official story

362
00:14:23,000 --> 00:14:24,840
became that the Holy Blood had been stolen by a

363
00:14:24,840 --> 00:14:28,759
group of professional thieves at the behest of all wealthy benefactor. However,

364
00:14:28,919 --> 00:14:30,960
someone was rich enough to finance the theft of such

365
00:14:31,000 --> 00:14:32,600
a relic. You can bet that they had a large

366
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house with a large stuff a staff, which, if they

367
00:14:35,320 --> 00:14:37,559
believed the blood of Christ was secreted somewhere in their

368
00:14:37,559 --> 00:14:39,600
home would have had a very hard time keeping their

369
00:14:39,639 --> 00:14:43,200
mouth shut about it. Yet, as history shows, neither the

370
00:14:43,200 --> 00:14:46,039
thieves nor the buyer were ever found. Many believed the

371
00:14:46,039 --> 00:14:48,480
Holy Blood would still be intact, hidden away somewhere until

372
00:14:48,480 --> 00:14:52,320
its inevitable discovery. Others have a much more disconcerting explanation.

373
00:14:52,960 --> 00:14:55,399
Shortly after the theft of the Holy Blood, a royally

374
00:14:55,440 --> 00:14:58,919
sanctioned which finder arrived in Gloucestershire. The King of England,

375
00:14:59,039 --> 00:15:01,639
James Eye, was obst est with stamping out witchcraft and

376
00:15:01,679 --> 00:15:03,679
other heresy, and so when he heard the Holy Blood

377
00:15:03,720 --> 00:15:06,000
had been stolen, he believed devilry was afot and sent

378
00:15:06,039 --> 00:15:08,360
as Chief were Trender to root it out. The witch

379
00:15:08,440 --> 00:15:11,360
Render's investigation led to the Burly witch Trials, whereby Joan

380
00:15:11,440 --> 00:15:14,159
Flower and her two daughters, Margaret and Philippa, were accused

381
00:15:14,159 --> 00:15:16,879
of cursing the Earl of Rutland. After half a dozen

382
00:15:16,919 --> 00:15:20,080
of the Earl's family and friends suffered southern and tragic deaths,

383
00:15:20,080 --> 00:15:23,240
many blamed a hidden coven of witches. Margaret and Philip

384
00:15:23,320 --> 00:15:26,480
of Flora were hunted. Dan arrested then hand following convictions

385
00:15:26,519 --> 00:15:29,879
for communing with the devil. Their mother, heartbroken and impoverished,

386
00:15:29,879 --> 00:15:32,720
died in prison not long after. A few years later,

387
00:15:32,799 --> 00:15:35,240
a woman named Alice Colin was accused of causing illness

388
00:15:35,240 --> 00:15:38,279
and death by using curses and charms. She was convicted

389
00:15:38,399 --> 00:15:41,039
following tessamonies from her own neighbors, and was executed to

390
00:15:41,080 --> 00:15:43,759
the cheers of the gathered Tantzuk. It's clear that at

391
00:15:43,759 --> 00:15:45,600
the time many believed that the Holy Blood had been

392
00:15:45,639 --> 00:15:47,480
stolen by the accused and used in a seige of

393
00:15:47,480 --> 00:15:50,759
profane rituals. They believed these rituals had brought a great

394
00:15:50,799 --> 00:15:52,960
and terrible darkness to the region, and it seems there

395
00:15:53,000 --> 00:15:55,480
are some who still believed this even hundreds of years later.

396
00:15:56,120 --> 00:15:59,120
I've seen some rather unsettling graffiti around town over the years,

397
00:15:59,240 --> 00:16:01,799
things quite unlike the usual drostinages like to dall, but

398
00:16:01,840 --> 00:16:04,200
those will not be the focus of this memoir. What

399
00:16:04,279 --> 00:16:05,960
I've told you are things I wished on you before

400
00:16:05,960 --> 00:16:08,279
I arrived in Wittscomb, and because at the very least,

401
00:16:08,279 --> 00:16:10,279
I feel like they have helped me understand some of

402
00:16:10,279 --> 00:16:13,159
the things that have happened here since. For although I

403
00:16:13,159 --> 00:16:15,519
now live a life of peace, harmony and simplicity, I

404
00:16:15,559 --> 00:16:17,919
had to endure a living nightmare to obtain it. I

405
00:16:17,919 --> 00:16:20,840
won't stultify you with the finer details of entering the priesthood,

406
00:16:20,960 --> 00:16:24,240
but let's just say it's neither quick, nor easy nor painless.

407
00:16:24,720 --> 00:16:27,399
For some prospective priests it takes years of discernment before

408
00:16:27,399 --> 00:16:30,600
they commit themselves. Then after that you're looking at a

409
00:16:30,639 --> 00:16:33,720
decade of training until you're even considered for priesthood. Then

410
00:16:33,759 --> 00:16:35,799
when you finally do become a priest, you have to

411
00:16:35,799 --> 00:16:38,759
serve under another much more experienced counterpart before either taking

412
00:16:38,759 --> 00:16:40,759
over the parish should being assigned one of your own.

413
00:16:41,240 --> 00:16:43,159
That's the exact position I was in when I arrived

414
00:16:43,159 --> 00:16:46,759
in winchkimb back in early twenty twenty. Saint Nicholas's church

415
00:16:46,799 --> 00:16:49,240
was under the care of Father Michael, an elderly priesthood

416
00:16:49,320 --> 00:16:52,600
held the position since the Midmanus one thousand, nine hundred seventies.

417
00:16:53,200 --> 00:16:54,879
He was set to retire in the summer of twenty

418
00:16:54,919 --> 00:16:57,600
twenty one, so the idea was I had spend eighteen

419
00:16:57,600 --> 00:17:00,120
months under his tutelage before taking over as guardian of

420
00:17:00,159 --> 00:17:03,039
the church in parish. The usual period of tutelage is

421
00:17:03,080 --> 00:17:05,240
two years, so as you can imagine, I was rather

422
00:17:05,279 --> 00:17:08,400
surprised at the offer of a rare shortcut. Needless to say,

423
00:17:08,440 --> 00:17:11,319
it came with a caveat. Father Michael, who was almost

424
00:17:11,359 --> 00:17:13,519
seventy nine years old when we first met, had been

425
00:17:13,519 --> 00:17:15,559
in a state of mental decline for quite some time,

426
00:17:15,640 --> 00:17:17,759
and his condition had become of deep concern to many

427
00:17:17,759 --> 00:17:21,839
of his parishioners. People spoke of strange sermons, troubing outbursts

428
00:17:21,920 --> 00:17:25,400
while settling remarks during cloystood conversations, and to aboss the

429
00:17:25,400 --> 00:17:28,440
Bishop of Clifton this was unacceptable. If I could keep

430
00:17:28,440 --> 00:17:31,039
Father Michael's behavior under wraps and prevent the situation from

431
00:17:31,079 --> 00:17:33,440
progressing into a full blown scandal, then one of the

432
00:17:33,440 --> 00:17:35,680
most coveted parishes in England would be mine for as

433
00:17:35,720 --> 00:17:37,799
long as I could serve it. I knew it would

434
00:17:37,799 --> 00:17:40,119
be a challenge. I was taking on the role of

435
00:17:40,119 --> 00:17:41,799
a car as well as a priest, But at the

436
00:17:41,839 --> 00:17:44,480
same time it was an absolute no brainer. As they say,

437
00:17:45,119 --> 00:17:47,039
I considered it an honor to be able to attend

438
00:17:47,079 --> 00:17:48,839
to a veteran of the church during the twilight of

439
00:17:48,880 --> 00:17:51,920
his tenure. I just didn't realize how terribly taxing it

440
00:17:51,920 --> 00:17:53,839
would prove to be, both to my faith and to

441
00:17:53,880 --> 00:17:57,559
my sanity. I first visited Winschkem in December of twenty nineteen.

442
00:17:57,680 --> 00:18:00,599
Prior to my confirmation there, Father Mike had something in

443
00:18:00,599 --> 00:18:02,519
the final say on whom he transferred the parish to.

444
00:18:02,799 --> 00:18:05,400
But after some afternoon tea and a long conversation on

445
00:18:05,440 --> 00:18:08,039
equomanical matters, the man himself told me that I've gotten

446
00:18:08,079 --> 00:18:11,240
the job. Father Michael wasn't anything like I'd imagined him,

447
00:18:11,279 --> 00:18:13,039
and in so many words, I've been told that he

448
00:18:13,079 --> 00:18:15,119
was losing his mind and was a liability to the church.

449
00:18:15,799 --> 00:18:18,880
But our meetings suggested nothing of the sort. Father Michael

450
00:18:19,000 --> 00:18:21,039
was aged, but his mind was as sharp as his wit,

451
00:18:21,200 --> 00:18:22,920
and as I said, we spoke at length on a

452
00:18:23,000 --> 00:18:25,759
number of different topics, all of which he displayed a

453
00:18:25,799 --> 00:18:28,880
vast knowledge of. He was a sort of bewelcoming, charming,

454
00:18:28,920 --> 00:18:32,839
but humble, and displayed wisdom without arrogance. He embodied everything

455
00:18:32,880 --> 00:18:35,319
I thought a priest was supposed to, so quarks were

456
00:18:35,319 --> 00:18:37,680
no quirks. I was thrilled at the prospect of being

457
00:18:37,720 --> 00:18:40,119
minted by him, even if that mentorship came with its

458
00:18:40,200 --> 00:18:43,559
unique set of challenges. In early February of twenty twenty,

459
00:18:43,680 --> 00:18:45,440
I moved into the spare room of the cottage that

460
00:18:45,519 --> 00:18:49,279
stands behind Saint Nicholas's Church. It's a beautiful little cottage

461
00:18:49,279 --> 00:18:51,880
with a thatched roof and a small rose garden. It's

462
00:18:51,920 --> 00:18:53,799
also my current home and the place at I presently

463
00:18:53,799 --> 00:18:56,759
sit and tied this memoir. But back when I first arrived,

464
00:18:56,799 --> 00:18:59,480
it was a place of great uncertainty from me. But now,

465
00:18:59,640 --> 00:19:01,640
almost five years to the day since I moved into

466
00:19:01,640 --> 00:19:04,519
their cottage, I have more unanswered Christians than ever. My

467
00:19:04,599 --> 00:19:07,279
first month or so under Father Michael's tutelig went smoothly.

468
00:19:07,799 --> 00:19:10,799
I helped him perform mass I helped him perform baptisms,

469
00:19:10,960 --> 00:19:13,359
and we went through procedures for both weddings and funerals.

470
00:19:14,079 --> 00:19:17,079
I accompanied Father Michael in visits to hospitals and nursing homes,

471
00:19:17,319 --> 00:19:19,799
and I sat down on pastoral counseling sessions to learn

472
00:19:19,799 --> 00:19:22,279
how to provide guidance and support to my future parishoners.

473
00:19:22,960 --> 00:19:25,880
I shadowed Father Michael in preparing sermons and homilies, and

474
00:19:25,920 --> 00:19:28,039
then when it came to my own personal duties, I

475
00:19:28,079 --> 00:19:31,319
would organize Bible steady groups or youth group meetings. I

476
00:19:31,319 --> 00:19:34,079
also had to manage the daily administrative duties of the church,

477
00:19:34,119 --> 00:19:36,920
which kept me very busy, I can assure you, but

478
00:19:37,000 --> 00:19:39,559
that first month, aided by the warmth of the Christmas season,

479
00:19:39,799 --> 00:19:42,240
made for a very smooth transition into my new life.

480
00:19:42,599 --> 00:19:44,960
There were no signs of Father Michael's decline, none of

481
00:19:44,960 --> 00:19:47,160
his episodes as people I had taken too calling them,

482
00:19:47,200 --> 00:19:48,839
and at first it appeared the whole thing had been

483
00:19:48,880 --> 00:19:52,920
quite overblown. But then it happened. One evening after dinner,

484
00:19:53,000 --> 00:19:54,839
Father Michael and I were enjoying a cup of tea

485
00:19:54,839 --> 00:19:56,960
and a few biscuits when the subject of parish funerals

486
00:19:56,960 --> 00:19:59,920
came up. A conversation on the topic then meandered in

487
00:20:00,000 --> 00:20:01,960
to one about death in general. And while that might

488
00:20:02,000 --> 00:20:04,240
sound like a subject too heavy for tea and biscuits,

489
00:20:04,279 --> 00:20:06,359
discussion of the afterlife can be a rather common thing

490
00:20:06,400 --> 00:20:08,920
for those who take the cloth. Father Michael and I

491
00:20:08,920 --> 00:20:11,559
had very briefly touched on the subject while discussing parish

492
00:20:11,640 --> 00:20:14,079
funerals on a previous occasion, but that marked the first

493
00:20:14,079 --> 00:20:16,519
time that we delved into the subject in depth. He

494
00:20:16,599 --> 00:20:18,319
mentioned how his time on earth was drawn to a

495
00:20:18,359 --> 00:20:20,519
close and how he'd been pondering on what that meant

496
00:20:20,559 --> 00:20:23,279
for his eternal soul. Father Michael knew he'd lived a

497
00:20:23,319 --> 00:20:26,440
good and decent life, one dedicated almost entirely to the Church,

498
00:20:26,759 --> 00:20:29,720
no less, but he still found himself preoccupied by matters

499
00:20:29,720 --> 00:20:32,519
of faith. In a remark I thought was a passing one,

500
00:20:32,759 --> 00:20:35,319
Father Michael mentioned how he sometimes envied the holy martyrs,

501
00:20:35,359 --> 00:20:37,680
those whose dedication to the faith had cost him their lives.

502
00:20:38,279 --> 00:20:40,960
He quite rightly said that while priests occupies special place

503
00:20:41,000 --> 00:20:44,160
in heaven, martyrs, by virtue of this sacrifice made bypass

504
00:20:44,240 --> 00:20:47,200
progatory and enter Heaven immediately, as their suffering is considered

505
00:20:47,240 --> 00:20:50,079
a purification in itself, and it's this that was the

506
00:20:50,119 --> 00:20:52,880
source of his self confessed to envy. The subject of

507
00:20:52,920 --> 00:20:55,079
the church as martyrs is something were encouraged to reflect

508
00:20:55,119 --> 00:20:57,160
on often, but at the time I was only familiar

509
00:20:57,200 --> 00:21:00,400
with some of the more well known martyrs. Their saints Stephen,

510
00:21:00,440 --> 00:21:02,359
the first Christian martyr, who was stone to death after

511
00:21:02,400 --> 00:21:05,880
preaching about Jesus. Then there Saint Peter, who was crucified

512
00:21:05,960 --> 00:21:07,799
upside down as he felt unworthy to die in the

513
00:21:07,799 --> 00:21:10,759
same way as Christ. But perhaps the most famous is

514
00:21:10,799 --> 00:21:13,759
Paul the Apostle, one of Christianity's greatest evangelist, who was

515
00:21:13,759 --> 00:21:17,160
beheaded in Romander Emperor Neer. Yet although we touched on them,

516
00:21:17,160 --> 00:21:19,319
it was in these Marty's father Michael wanted to discuss.

517
00:21:20,000 --> 00:21:22,079
He asked if I was aware of Saint Sebastian, and

518
00:21:22,200 --> 00:21:24,079
I was, but I discovered I was privy to the

519
00:21:24,079 --> 00:21:27,720
whole story. Sebastian was murdered by being shot full of errors,

520
00:21:27,759 --> 00:21:30,640
but bizarrely, and unbeknownst to myself, he'd survived this phase

521
00:21:30,640 --> 00:21:33,680
of his execution. His awestruck killers who had never seen

522
00:21:33,680 --> 00:21:36,200
such corporeal with silients, thin a tymn cut from the stick,

523
00:21:36,240 --> 00:21:38,279
he was tight and then beaten to death with clubs.

524
00:21:38,960 --> 00:21:41,039
They broke every bone in his body one by one

525
00:21:41,160 --> 00:21:43,759
until massive internal bleeding caused his heart to finally give

526
00:21:43,759 --> 00:21:46,720
out and he passed into martyrdom. Father Michael said that

527
00:21:46,759 --> 00:21:49,480
when he recently revisited the tale of Saint Betholomew, who

528
00:21:49,519 --> 00:21:52,440
was skinned alive prior to his beheading to ensure maximum suffering,

529
00:21:52,519 --> 00:21:55,079
he felt a deep and shameful sense of envy. He

530
00:21:55,119 --> 00:21:57,279
felt the same comfortousness when he re read the story

531
00:21:57,279 --> 00:21:59,519
of Saint Kavin of Alexandria, who was put to death

532
00:21:59,559 --> 00:22:02,319
using a spot white breaking wheel and for the unfamiliar.

533
00:22:02,359 --> 00:22:04,599
The breaking wheel is a method of execution which involves

534
00:22:04,640 --> 00:22:07,119
being tied to a large spoked wheel before your legs, arms,

535
00:22:07,200 --> 00:22:09,559
and ribs are broken, usually in that order to again

536
00:22:09,640 --> 00:22:13,319
cause maxim suffering. The wailing victims shattered Lindsa then woven

537
00:22:13,400 --> 00:22:15,960
into the breaking wheel spokes in the sickening cyclical recreation

538
00:22:16,039 --> 00:22:18,160
of the human form before being displayed as a warning

539
00:22:18,200 --> 00:22:20,839
to others. The fate of thus objected to the breaking

540
00:22:20,839 --> 00:22:22,880
wheel is similar to those who underwent crucifixion in that

541
00:22:22,920 --> 00:22:25,279
they didn't expire right away and sometimes spent days at

542
00:22:25,279 --> 00:22:27,279
a time clinging to life. Their body is rat with

543
00:22:27,279 --> 00:22:30,599
acony until they finally expired, And to put Saint Catherine's

544
00:22:30,599 --> 00:22:32,880
suffering into perspective, it said that the breaking wheel broke

545
00:22:32,920 --> 00:22:35,000
before she did, shattering from the force of the blows

546
00:22:35,000 --> 00:22:37,920
to her body before she was even close to expiring. Then,

547
00:22:38,240 --> 00:22:41,359
much like Saint Sebastian, her executioners were so awestruck at

548
00:22:41,359 --> 00:22:43,480
her dedication to her faith that they ordered her beheaded

549
00:22:43,559 --> 00:22:46,680
less he's ill proved contagious. Father Michael said that he

550
00:22:46,720 --> 00:22:49,039
also envied Saint Agnes, who was so touched by God's

551
00:22:49,039 --> 00:22:51,319
grace that the flames of her execution, Piet could not

552
00:22:51,400 --> 00:22:54,440
set her ablaze. He felt the same towards Saint Better

553
00:22:54,519 --> 00:22:56,799
and Saint Felicity, who in the Roman Colsium were torn

554
00:22:56,799 --> 00:22:59,079
apart by wild animals before being put to the sword.

555
00:22:59,720 --> 00:23:02,160
Father Michael claimed to feel a deep melancholy alarm, with

556
00:23:02,160 --> 00:23:04,400
the sense of frustration that God had never provided him

557
00:23:04,400 --> 00:23:07,599
with a similar opportunity to prove his faith. He acknowledged

558
00:23:07,599 --> 00:23:10,079
it was a dark, potentially perturbing point of view, yet

559
00:23:10,079 --> 00:23:12,519
it was one he wrestled none the less as ye

560
00:23:12,519 --> 00:23:15,240
can all imagine. I found his confession to be deeply unsettling,

561
00:23:15,440 --> 00:23:19,079
but relatively enterprising. I'd received prior warning that Father Michael

562
00:23:19,119 --> 00:23:21,799
might say or due some rather unusual things. Preventing such

563
00:23:21,799 --> 00:23:23,960
instances was half a reason I was there. But what

564
00:23:24,000 --> 00:23:26,039
I was not prepared for was what he said next.

565
00:23:26,720 --> 00:23:29,000
In known certain terms, Father Michael told me that he

566
00:23:29,039 --> 00:23:31,200
was not only envious of the Church's Holy martyrs, but

567
00:23:31,240 --> 00:23:34,000
also enid those who made them so. Unbeknownst to those

568
00:23:34,000 --> 00:23:36,759
who beheaded, flayed, or burned the faithful alive, they'd been

569
00:23:36,799 --> 00:23:38,960
a part of God's plan, and without their actions, the

570
00:23:39,000 --> 00:23:41,759
Holy Martyrs would not be so venerated to day, even

571
00:23:41,799 --> 00:23:44,119
if he himself could not achieve martyrdom, he would gladly

572
00:23:44,160 --> 00:23:46,799
swap places with one of the many martyrs executioners, simply

573
00:23:46,799 --> 00:23:49,519
to be closer to the act itself. Father Michael said,

574
00:23:49,519 --> 00:23:51,759
if he'd known the implications of his actions, he'd have

575
00:23:51,839 --> 00:23:54,480
tortured Saint catherin Lon after the wheel brooke, knowing her

576
00:23:54,519 --> 00:23:57,680
continued suffering would only elevate her status in heaven. As

577
00:23:57,680 --> 00:23:59,839
he talked, he became more and more animated, and then

578
00:24:00,160 --> 00:24:02,079
and more mannic, until suddenly there was spitt of flying

579
00:24:02,119 --> 00:24:03,880
from his lips as he made his case with wide

580
00:24:03,960 --> 00:24:07,039
frant guys. I'm not ashamed to say that I was frightened,

581
00:24:07,039 --> 00:24:10,000
because the fear wasn't for myself. It was entirely for

582
00:24:10,039 --> 00:24:12,519
the health and well being of Father Michael. It had

583
00:24:12,519 --> 00:24:15,440
been the first time he'd exhibited any objectively disturbing or

584
00:24:15,480 --> 00:24:17,839
upsetting behavior, the kind of thing I'd been warned about

585
00:24:17,839 --> 00:24:20,960
before my arrival. But still seeing it a close for

586
00:24:21,000 --> 00:24:23,279
the first time, and knowing justtoographically he could speak, it

587
00:24:23,319 --> 00:24:26,319
made for a chilling revelation. I reported the incident back

588
00:24:26,359 --> 00:24:28,279
to the Bishop of Clifton, the head clergyman for all

589
00:24:28,279 --> 00:24:30,759
of Glercshire, and he essentially told me to keep up

590
00:24:30,759 --> 00:24:33,400
the good work. I'd managed to talk Father Michael Dan

591
00:24:33,440 --> 00:24:35,359
from the mild form of mania he talked himself into,

592
00:24:35,440 --> 00:24:38,240
and he seemed rather self aware regarding his deteriorating condition,

593
00:24:38,559 --> 00:24:41,519
So there was no comfort following my intervention, But the

594
00:24:41,559 --> 00:24:43,440
same could not be said for the next instance of

595
00:24:43,440 --> 00:24:47,160
de escalation. Some time after our conversation on Martyrs, Father

596
00:24:47,200 --> 00:24:49,400
Michael asked if he could share something with me, something

597
00:24:49,400 --> 00:24:52,279
he believed might make me rather uncomfortable. When we got

598
00:24:52,319 --> 00:24:54,480
back to the cottage, I put the kettle on, put

599
00:24:54,519 --> 00:24:56,799
on a few biscuit and cream cakes, and then sat

600
00:24:56,839 --> 00:24:59,400
down for some tea. Before he made his rather daunting announcement.

601
00:25:00,119 --> 00:25:02,720
Father Michael had been talking to an angel, and my

602
00:25:02,799 --> 00:25:05,519
heart sank the moment he said it, realizing his condition

603
00:25:05,599 --> 00:25:08,319
was far more severe than mere vobal diarrhea. If he

604
00:25:08,359 --> 00:25:11,559
was suffering audible or even visual hallucinations, then he evidently

605
00:25:11,559 --> 00:25:15,200
required urgent medical care. And as you can very well imagine,

606
00:25:15,240 --> 00:25:16,599
I was keen to get to the bottom of his

607
00:25:16,640 --> 00:25:19,599
angelic interactions to determine if they were harmless metaphors or

608
00:25:19,680 --> 00:25:23,440
yet more worrying manifestations of his encroaching madness. Father Michael

609
00:25:23,480 --> 00:25:25,440
told me that for the past few years, an angel

610
00:25:25,480 --> 00:25:27,240
had visited him in the middle of the night around

611
00:25:27,279 --> 00:25:30,000
once a week. He'd waken in the wee, small eyeOS

612
00:25:30,039 --> 00:25:31,839
of the morning, not to her voice, but her feeling,

613
00:25:31,960 --> 00:25:34,279
and then after walking downstairs, he'd sit in the darkness

614
00:25:34,319 --> 00:25:35,680
in the chair in the corner of the room and

615
00:25:35,759 --> 00:25:38,200
he'd listened to the angel speak to him. I asked

616
00:25:38,200 --> 00:25:40,400
what form this angel appeared to her, then that Father

617
00:25:40,440 --> 00:25:43,119
Michael didn't know. He sat in the corner facing the

618
00:25:43,160 --> 00:25:46,119
wall as a means of protecting himself. He believed looking

619
00:25:46,200 --> 00:25:48,440
upon the angel's form without the proper permission would burn

620
00:25:48,519 --> 00:25:50,960
his eyes out and set his very mind flame. I

621
00:25:51,000 --> 00:25:53,000
asked Father Thomas what made him think that he didn't

622
00:25:53,039 --> 00:25:54,839
have permission to look if the angel was present and

623
00:25:54,880 --> 00:25:57,160
conversing with him, And without going into the long winded

624
00:25:57,200 --> 00:25:59,640
explanation he gave me, let's just say that his answers

625
00:25:59,640 --> 00:26:03,440
were best inconsistent. I knew he needed help, and he

626
00:26:03,480 --> 00:26:05,400
needed it as soon as possible. But when I tried

627
00:26:05,440 --> 00:26:07,920
contacting the Bishop with my concerns, the only person I

628
00:26:07,920 --> 00:26:10,039
could reach was his assistant priest whom to save his

629
00:26:10,079 --> 00:26:14,079
own embarrassment or remain unnamed. Now, Father Nameless or should

630
00:26:14,119 --> 00:26:16,440
that be Father Spineless claimed the Bishop was very busy

631
00:26:16,440 --> 00:26:18,599
with prior engagement, but that he'd be more than happy

632
00:26:18,599 --> 00:26:21,400
to assist me. Obviously, my request was that he put

633
00:26:21,440 --> 00:26:22,920
me in touch with the Bishop because I had a

634
00:26:23,000 --> 00:26:25,440
very important development to report to him. But after almost

635
00:26:25,440 --> 00:26:27,599
a week of all forscutting, I realized the Bishop was

636
00:26:27,640 --> 00:26:31,279
deliberately avoiding my calls. I was furious, but the Church's

637
00:26:31,279 --> 00:26:34,519
strict hierarchy is just that strict. I had no choice

638
00:26:34,519 --> 00:26:36,519
but to deal with Father Spyness, and the process was

639
00:26:36,519 --> 00:26:39,839
as frustrating as it was fruitless. Much like the realization

640
00:26:39,880 --> 00:26:41,920
that the Bishop was avoiding my calls, there came a

641
00:26:41,960 --> 00:26:44,160
point where I realized Father Spyness was acting in a

642
00:26:44,160 --> 00:26:47,640
manner one might describe as deliberately obtuse. When I explained

643
00:26:47,680 --> 00:26:50,400
that Father Thomas needed urgent psychiatric care, he asked for

644
00:26:50,440 --> 00:26:52,680
more details, but when I gave them, he appeared to

645
00:26:52,680 --> 00:26:55,680
completely misunderstand both the timeline and the severity of the events.

646
00:26:56,359 --> 00:26:58,799
I hadn't dealt with this assistant much, after all, I

647
00:26:58,920 --> 00:27:01,039
was only a few months into my winch contenure, But

648
00:27:01,119 --> 00:27:02,960
it didn't take me very long to figure out that

649
00:27:03,000 --> 00:27:05,039
he wasn't in a besselle. He was merely acting like

650
00:27:05,079 --> 00:27:07,799
one and all with a view to frustrating my attempts

651
00:27:07,799 --> 00:27:10,440
to get help for Father Michael. Without going into too

652
00:27:10,480 --> 00:27:13,440
much detail, if Father Michael needed serious psychiatic care before

653
00:27:13,440 --> 00:27:15,720
his retirement, the Church would be obligated to pay for

654
00:27:15,759 --> 00:27:19,359
his medication and potentially even expensive private medical care. But

655
00:27:19,440 --> 00:27:21,960
if his condition stayed a secret until after his retirement,

656
00:27:22,000 --> 00:27:25,440
then any expenses incurred would be Father Michael's responsibility. The

657
00:27:25,519 --> 00:27:27,799
Church would still technically be paying for his treatment, but

658
00:27:27,880 --> 00:27:29,519
it had come out of his pension and not their

659
00:27:29,599 --> 00:27:32,640
own personal coffers. Break into too much of the budget

660
00:27:32,640 --> 00:27:34,680
and our bishop might lose his standing with the Archbishop,

661
00:27:34,720 --> 00:27:36,799
which would no doubt affect his chances of climbing the

662
00:27:36,799 --> 00:27:40,039
parochical ladder. I didn't find that out from Father Spyness,

663
00:27:40,160 --> 00:27:41,880
but when I did, you can bet your ask that

664
00:27:41,960 --> 00:27:44,160
I sensed some very ungodly language as way when I

665
00:27:44,200 --> 00:27:47,039
called him back. The audacity of the bishop to try

666
00:27:47,039 --> 00:27:49,000
and further his career, and at the cost of such

667
00:27:49,039 --> 00:27:51,440
a senior and well respected member of the church seemed

668
00:27:51,440 --> 00:27:54,319
nothing short of criminal wha The spinelist simply told me

669
00:27:54,359 --> 00:27:56,240
that he'd pass on what I'd said to the Bishop,

670
00:27:56,319 --> 00:27:59,160
and I assumed there was thinly veiled sarchism. It was not.

671
00:28:00,240 --> 00:28:02,279
Just a few hours later I received a call from

672
00:28:02,319 --> 00:28:04,400
none other than the Bishop himself, and to say he

673
00:28:04,440 --> 00:28:06,759
wasn't pleased with me would be the understatement of the sentry.

674
00:28:07,359 --> 00:28:10,279
Without giving details of the entire exchange, he rather furiously

675
00:28:10,279 --> 00:28:13,400
asked if his instructions had been unclear. He reminded me

676
00:28:13,440 --> 00:28:15,440
of what I'd been told prior to accepting my position

677
00:28:15,480 --> 00:28:18,240
in Winchcombe, and then asked if there's anything I misunderstood.

678
00:28:18,839 --> 00:28:21,279
I told him now that I hadn't misunderstood anything, but

679
00:28:21,279 --> 00:28:23,200
that Father Michael needed the kind of urgent care that

680
00:28:23,200 --> 00:28:25,920
I was incapable of providing as a mere priest. The

681
00:28:25,960 --> 00:28:28,079
Bishop then simply told me that if I was incapable

682
00:28:28,079 --> 00:28:30,519
of fulfilling my duties, he'd find some one that could.

683
00:28:31,160 --> 00:28:32,759
The whole point of me being there was to prevent

684
00:28:32,839 --> 00:28:35,319
any kind of scandal, be it moral in this case financial,

685
00:28:35,440 --> 00:28:37,640
and in all fairness, that had indeed been made clear

686
00:28:37,680 --> 00:28:40,359
to me prior to being formally offered the position. It

687
00:28:40,400 --> 00:28:42,039
was either put up and shut up or hit the

688
00:28:42,119 --> 00:28:44,119
road and potentially wait years for the chance to take

689
00:28:44,160 --> 00:28:46,640
another parish, because I would most certainly be blacklisted by

690
00:28:46,640 --> 00:28:51,440
the Bishop. Not formally, you understand, but blacklisted nevertheless. And

691
00:28:51,519 --> 00:28:53,680
so I issued a formal verbal apology to the Bishop

692
00:28:53,680 --> 00:28:55,720
and then reassured him I was capable of the task

693
00:28:55,759 --> 00:28:58,559
at hand. And that was the late spring of twenty twenty,

694
00:28:58,640 --> 00:29:01,400
and as many of you will remember, lockdowns followed shortly after.

695
00:29:02,039 --> 00:29:04,680
I thought the temporary cessation of church services would give

696
00:29:04,720 --> 00:29:07,000
Father Michael a well deserved break and to an extent,

697
00:29:07,160 --> 00:29:10,400
function exactly as I'd hoped, But over time, the prolonged

698
00:29:10,440 --> 00:29:12,960
desolation led to a serious and rapid decline in his condition.

699
00:29:13,599 --> 00:29:15,920
In the end, I actually considered the social distancing to

700
00:29:15,920 --> 00:29:18,039
be something of a double edged sword, because as much

701
00:29:18,039 --> 00:29:20,799
as it played havocne Father thomas mental health shielded his

702
00:29:20,839 --> 00:29:24,519
deterioration from the public eye. He became increasingly erratic, having

703
00:29:24,559 --> 00:29:27,519
difficulty sleeping, and was prone to increasingly maniacal upbursts, which

704
00:29:27,519 --> 00:29:30,640
both concerned and frightened me deeply. He remained fixated on

705
00:29:30,680 --> 00:29:32,799
the concept of martyrdom from the perspective of both the

706
00:29:32,799 --> 00:29:35,240
saint and the killer, and I took to locking my

707
00:29:35,279 --> 00:29:38,680
door at night for fear that he might do something unspeakable. Thankfully,

708
00:29:38,759 --> 00:29:40,839
the easing of lockdowns in the autumn of twenty twenty

709
00:29:40,880 --> 00:29:43,680
helped a great deal with Father Michael's condition. Being thus

710
00:29:43,759 --> 00:29:45,640
back into public life proved something of a shop to

711
00:29:45,680 --> 00:29:48,599
the system, and one he desperately needed, and so for

712
00:29:48,640 --> 00:29:50,640
a while anyway, he was able to get back into

713
00:29:50,640 --> 00:29:52,799
a steady routine and was able to focus his mind

714
00:29:52,839 --> 00:29:55,079
on much healthier thoughts than those of martyrdom and murder.

715
00:29:55,680 --> 00:29:58,559
But one's limitations were reintroduced towards All Saints Day, and

716
00:29:58,599 --> 00:30:00,400
Father Michael was limited in even the the number of

717
00:30:00,440 --> 00:30:03,559
funerals he could attend. His conditions sank back towards the severe.

718
00:30:04,000 --> 00:30:06,400
He became increasingly fixated in the idea that he was

719
00:30:06,400 --> 00:30:08,240
about to be the recipient of what he called a

720
00:30:08,279 --> 00:30:11,359
heavenly communication. But whenever I pressed him on the matters,

721
00:30:11,440 --> 00:30:14,079
he began speaking in scritural riddles and avoided giving any

722
00:30:14,079 --> 00:30:17,920
straight answers. Obviously, it was something I found deeply concerning,

723
00:30:18,119 --> 00:30:19,920
but it marked something of a new phrase in Father

724
00:30:19,960 --> 00:30:23,400
Michael's state of mind. Instead of brooding irritable and quick

725
00:30:23,440 --> 00:30:26,359
to anger. He was euphoric. As I said, it was

726
00:30:26,359 --> 00:30:29,039
deeply concerning. But this new phase came with behaviors that

727
00:30:29,079 --> 00:30:32,920
proved considerably more manageable than those previously exhibited. The approach

728
00:30:32,920 --> 00:30:35,400
in Christmas season gave him something to focus his mind on,

729
00:30:35,680 --> 00:30:38,720
something that wasn't as ghastly or gory as his former fixations,

730
00:30:38,960 --> 00:30:42,279
and that I most warmly welcomed. Yet after New Year's

731
00:30:42,319 --> 00:30:45,480
Day came and went, things changed dramatically. The isolation of

732
00:30:45,480 --> 00:30:48,039
the January lockdowns and the desolation of the bleak British

733
00:30:48,039 --> 00:30:50,440
went to prove devastating to Father Michael's state of mind.

734
00:30:51,119 --> 00:30:53,359
His conversations with that Angel went from being a weekly

735
00:30:53,400 --> 00:30:55,400
to an almost nightly affair, which in TURNE meant as

736
00:30:55,400 --> 00:30:59,920
sleep hygiene was atrocious. He became irritable, angry, sometimes even violent,

737
00:31:00,119 --> 00:31:03,000
and he smashed household items, snapped at parishoners, and in

738
00:31:03,039 --> 00:31:05,319
one instance I had to physically intervene during a mass.

739
00:31:05,319 --> 00:31:08,240
After he took a disturbing diversion relating to commning with angels,

740
00:31:08,880 --> 00:31:10,960
I began to wonder if I could survive another year

741
00:31:11,039 --> 00:31:13,759
of Father Michael's tutelage, and I used the words survive

742
00:31:13,799 --> 00:31:16,400
in the literal sense. Little did I know, but he

743
00:31:16,480 --> 00:31:19,960
begne within a month. Throughout most of February twenty twenty one,

744
00:31:20,279 --> 00:31:22,839
Father Michael had been taking a break from his paracal duties.

745
00:31:23,400 --> 00:31:26,160
He had refused previous suggestions he undertake a period of rest,

746
00:31:26,319 --> 00:31:28,880
but following the cessation of the Christmas period, his mania

747
00:31:28,880 --> 00:31:31,759
had been replaced by a rather crippling depression. His public

748
00:31:31,799 --> 00:31:34,480
absence was relatively easy to explain, and I was experienced

749
00:31:34,559 --> 00:31:37,640
enough to effectively replace him during that period. But then

750
00:31:37,640 --> 00:31:40,240
one Sunday morning, the twenty eighth of February, to be exact,

751
00:31:40,279 --> 00:31:42,960
I worked to find Father Michael dressed, composed and ready

752
00:31:42,960 --> 00:31:45,839
to administer mass. It was like all his depression a

753
00:31:45,920 --> 00:31:48,839
mayniad suddenly evaporated, and not only did he seem perfectly

754
00:31:48,839 --> 00:31:51,759
fit unwell, but he seemed positively excited to perform mass.

755
00:31:52,400 --> 00:31:55,480
The service itself went impeccably, and the parishoners were positively

756
00:31:55,480 --> 00:31:59,440
beaming to see him up and about again following his absence. Then, afterwards,

757
00:31:59,519 --> 00:32:01,720
over ap parst tea and a few custard creams, I

758
00:32:01,799 --> 00:32:05,119
began acting Father Michaels about his rejuvenated state I asked

759
00:32:05,119 --> 00:32:08,839
a few gentle but probing questions. His responses were quite direct.

760
00:32:09,440 --> 00:32:11,599
He told me that over the previous twelve months he'd

761
00:32:11,599 --> 00:32:14,559
ask God many many questions, none of which had received

762
00:32:14,559 --> 00:32:16,599
an answer. But in the early eye it was a

763
00:32:16,640 --> 00:32:19,319
Sunday morning, he'd finally received a response from the angel

764
00:32:19,359 --> 00:32:22,079
he'd been communicating with. The angel told him how the

765
00:32:22,240 --> 00:32:24,680
very night Father Michael would be given a sign, and

766
00:32:24,720 --> 00:32:27,160
he would not know where, how, or exactly when, but

767
00:32:27,200 --> 00:32:29,920
he would be given a sign. Again. I did nothing

768
00:32:29,960 --> 00:32:32,559
but worry. He had piques and then troughs, and then

769
00:32:32,599 --> 00:32:35,359
hire his peaks, the lower his troughs. And if his

770
00:32:35,440 --> 00:32:37,759
so called angel failed to reappear that evening, if he

771
00:32:37,799 --> 00:32:39,759
didn't receive his so cold sign, there would be a

772
00:32:39,839 --> 00:32:41,599
change in his mood and it might plummet toward a

773
00:32:41,680 --> 00:32:44,680
manageable or even dangerous lose. All I could do was

774
00:32:44,720 --> 00:32:46,680
hope for the best and be ready for anything. But

775
00:32:46,720 --> 00:32:49,759
nothing could have prepared me for what happened that night. Nothing.

776
00:32:50,359 --> 00:32:52,559
Father Michael's usual bedtime, the one he stuck to when

777
00:32:52,559 --> 00:32:55,200
he wasn't feeling mannic, was usually around nine point thirty

778
00:32:55,240 --> 00:32:57,519
at night. He taught her off around nine and that

779
00:32:57,599 --> 00:32:59,680
was under the impression that he was undertaking his evening

780
00:32:59,720 --> 00:33:02,599
bed time routine. But then suddenly he reappeared fully dressed

781
00:33:02,640 --> 00:33:05,039
and began to put his coat on. I asked him

782
00:33:05,039 --> 00:33:07,599
where he was going, but he didn't respond. He just

783
00:33:07,640 --> 00:33:09,519
walked towards the front door of the cottage, and then

784
00:33:09,559 --> 00:33:11,119
as he opened it, he looked at me and said,

785
00:33:11,240 --> 00:33:14,160
you're going to follow me. He didn't say it an imperative.

786
00:33:14,240 --> 00:33:16,240
It wasn't a command. It was a statement, an emotional

787
00:33:16,319 --> 00:33:19,480
statement of cold, hard fact. Because as he stepped out

788
00:33:19,519 --> 00:33:21,440
of the cottage and began walking off into the night,

789
00:33:21,519 --> 00:33:23,240
I rushed to put on my own coat and hat

790
00:33:23,279 --> 00:33:26,400
and then followed him. All of my questions went unanswered.

791
00:33:26,920 --> 00:33:29,000
Father Michael simply told me to be patient, and Anne

792
00:33:29,039 --> 00:33:30,720
led me on a short walk out into a field

793
00:33:30,799 --> 00:33:33,400
just eae of sut Mel Lane. I walked through the trees,

794
00:33:33,519 --> 00:33:36,119
crossed the public footpath, and then stopped some place in

795
00:33:36,119 --> 00:33:38,160
the middle of the field, looking out toward Rushie Lane.

796
00:33:38,599 --> 00:33:40,720
I once again asked Father Michael what he was during,

797
00:33:40,839 --> 00:33:43,200
but instead of further dismissal of my question, he told

798
00:33:43,200 --> 00:33:45,440
me were waiting, and then took something small from his

799
00:33:45,480 --> 00:33:48,359
pocket and unfolded it. It was a penknife. It's blake,

800
00:33:48,400 --> 00:33:51,160
glinting in the pill moonlight. I pulled up my phone

801
00:33:51,160 --> 00:33:53,240
and placed to phone call to the local police. Exactly

802
00:33:53,319 --> 00:33:56,480
nine point forty seven pound I remember. I told them

803
00:33:56,480 --> 00:33:58,799
Father Michael was having another of his episodes, but that

804
00:33:58,880 --> 00:34:01,400
this was one much more severe than the others. The

805
00:34:01,440 --> 00:34:03,680
despatcher taught me officers would be there with the minutes,

806
00:34:03,720 --> 00:34:05,480
and then after that, dehun up and went about trying

807
00:34:05,519 --> 00:34:07,559
to talk Father Michael out of doing whatever I believed

808
00:34:07,559 --> 00:34:09,280
he was planning on doing. But he struck me, really

809
00:34:09,280 --> 00:34:10,920
struck me. I mean, and it wasn't the knife that

810
00:34:10,960 --> 00:34:12,639
he produced, It was how calm and collected he was.

811
00:34:12,639 --> 00:34:14,119
As I bit him to fold away the knife and

812
00:34:14,159 --> 00:34:17,280
reconsider or whatever he was planning. Father Michael simply smiled.

813
00:34:17,880 --> 00:34:19,719
He told me all I needed to do was wait

814
00:34:19,760 --> 00:34:21,760
a few more minutes and then all would become clear.

815
00:34:22,360 --> 00:34:24,079
I told him the police were on their way, and

816
00:34:24,119 --> 00:34:26,039
that in order to prevent scandal, he needed to make

817
00:34:26,079 --> 00:34:28,239
sure that the knife was out of sight before they arrived.

818
00:34:28,880 --> 00:34:31,559
Father Michael didn't listen, and once again simply told me

819
00:34:31,599 --> 00:34:34,280
to be patient. A wave of relief washed over me.

820
00:34:34,320 --> 00:34:36,159
As I saw the blue flashing lights of the police

821
00:34:36,199 --> 00:34:38,159
car behind us, and I began calling out to them

822
00:34:38,199 --> 00:34:41,360
as they advanced in our direction. Once they drew level,

823
00:34:41,360 --> 00:34:43,199
I told them Father Michael had a knife, at which

824
00:34:43,239 --> 00:34:46,159
point the officer produced an electric stun gun. I saw

825
00:34:46,239 --> 00:34:48,719
him produce the stun gun, then turned back towards Father Michael,

826
00:34:48,719 --> 00:34:50,519
intent on begging him to put down the knife, and

827
00:34:50,559 --> 00:34:52,599
something happened that I have yet to reconcile with my

828
00:34:52,639 --> 00:34:55,599
own sanity. Father Michael was looking up into the skies,

829
00:34:55,599 --> 00:34:57,679
completely deaf to the police, of both myself and the

830
00:34:57,679 --> 00:34:59,559
police officers, and then out of nowid there was a

831
00:34:59,559 --> 00:35:01,840
great grip flash in the sky before a sharp streak

832
00:35:01,840 --> 00:35:04,639
of bright white light bursts from the green flash. It

833
00:35:04,760 --> 00:35:06,880
was one of the most incredible things I had ever seen.

834
00:35:06,920 --> 00:35:08,719
And then as the strange lights faded and a great

835
00:35:08,719 --> 00:35:11,920
boom echoed across the sky's, Father Michael turned He told

836
00:35:11,920 --> 00:35:13,519
me his question being answered that he was to be

837
00:35:13,559 --> 00:35:15,199
martyred at the hands of the man standing in the

838
00:35:15,239 --> 00:35:17,000
field at him, and that man was Meet. He approached

839
00:35:17,039 --> 00:35:18,480
Meet with the knife, holding it up by the blade

840
00:35:18,519 --> 00:35:20,360
as the police screened at him to stand still and

841
00:35:20,400 --> 00:35:22,199
put the knife done. All three of us, myself and

842
00:35:22,239 --> 00:35:24,599
the two offices began backing away from Father Michael, begging

843
00:35:24,679 --> 00:35:26,679
him to stop what he was doing before somebody got hut.

844
00:35:26,719 --> 00:35:28,760
He commanded me to tell him over and over again,

845
00:35:28,800 --> 00:35:30,760
and each time I refused, he became more and more

846
00:35:30,800 --> 00:35:32,880
of it. Then finally he completely lost his mind. He

847
00:35:32,920 --> 00:35:34,599
turned the knife for an, charged at me with it

848
00:35:34,679 --> 00:35:36,639
raised above his head, and was instantly shot by the

849
00:35:36,639 --> 00:35:39,119
stun gun wilding policeman. He dropped to the gun, felt conscious,

850
00:35:39,119 --> 00:35:41,599
and was swiftly transported to hospital, where I was assured

851
00:35:41,599 --> 00:35:43,519
that he had every hope of making a full recovery.

852
00:35:44,039 --> 00:35:47,239
But Father Michael never woke up. The stun gun's charge,

853
00:35:47,320 --> 00:35:49,599
in tandem with an a diagnosed heart condition, had a

854
00:35:49,679 --> 00:35:53,039
terrible effect on Father Michael's cardiovuscular health. He grew worse

855
00:35:53,079 --> 00:35:55,239
and worse, until eventually he simply passed away in the

856
00:35:55,239 --> 00:35:57,880
early hours of the following morning. I was the first

857
00:35:57,920 --> 00:35:59,840
to hear the news, and when I did, I wept.

858
00:36:00,559 --> 00:36:02,519
But it wasn't so much shock or grief that brought

859
00:36:02,519 --> 00:36:05,000
tears to my eyes. It was that Father and Michael

860
00:36:05,000 --> 00:36:08,000
had been proven right. Father Michael believed God had told

861
00:36:08,039 --> 00:36:09,679
him how he be martyred that night by some one

862
00:36:09,719 --> 00:36:13,039
standing in the field with him. He believed the Winchkom meteorite,

863
00:36:13,079 --> 00:36:16,360
which has since been completely and scientifically blamed, was his

864
00:36:16,440 --> 00:36:18,440
sign that he was indeed to become a holy martyr.

865
00:36:19,039 --> 00:36:21,280
He didn't believe he'd leave that field alive, and in

866
00:36:21,320 --> 00:36:23,639
more ways than one, the actions of that policeman proved

867
00:36:23,679 --> 00:36:26,920
him exactly right. I've no idea how Father Michael knew

868
00:36:26,920 --> 00:36:29,679
about the meteorite. Sometimes I think it was all just

869
00:36:29,719 --> 00:36:32,199
some terrible coincidence, and that its sudden appearance was a

870
00:36:32,199 --> 00:36:36,000
matter of misfortune. But other times I think differently. Frankly,

871
00:36:36,039 --> 00:36:38,480
I'm not sure what to think any more. The only

872
00:36:38,519 --> 00:36:40,360
thing I know for certain about the incident is that

873
00:36:40,400 --> 00:36:42,559
it joins the long list of other strange occurrences that

874
00:36:42,599 --> 00:36:45,760
have taken place in Winchham over the years, and doubtless

875
00:36:45,800 --> 00:36:48,880
there will be many many more. Back in twenty thirteen,

876
00:36:49,039 --> 00:36:51,159
I was a deputy manager at a hardware store here

877
00:36:51,159 --> 00:36:54,400
in Delaware. For my morning's shifts, I'd open the place up,

878
00:36:54,519 --> 00:36:56,960
get the computer and registers up and running, then I'd

879
00:36:57,000 --> 00:36:59,719
head into the office to check our answering machine. This

880
00:36:59,880 --> 00:37:01,920
was probably one of the more crucial aspects of my

881
00:37:01,960 --> 00:37:03,920
morning routine, because that was my way of finding out

882
00:37:03,960 --> 00:37:06,400
if any the liverers had canceled, if anything was arriving

883
00:37:06,400 --> 00:37:08,760
outlier than expected, and also if anyone had called and

884
00:37:08,800 --> 00:37:11,360
sick that morning. So I sit down with my coffee

885
00:37:11,360 --> 00:37:13,880
and I listened to maybe two or three fairly routine messages.

886
00:37:14,440 --> 00:37:16,440
Then when I hit play on the next one, I

887
00:37:16,519 --> 00:37:19,480
recognized a voice right away. I'd been half expecting to

888
00:37:19,519 --> 00:37:21,639
hear Gregg's voice on one of the messages, because he

889
00:37:21,679 --> 00:37:23,280
was supposed to be there that morning to help me

890
00:37:23,320 --> 00:37:26,079
open up. Hearing his voice was kind of a relief

891
00:37:26,079 --> 00:37:27,920
of furze, because at least to neither he was okay

892
00:37:27,960 --> 00:37:30,320
and just sick. But that's not what he'd called to

893
00:37:30,360 --> 00:37:33,840
tell us. Gregg was an older guy, close to retirement age,

894
00:37:34,199 --> 00:37:36,320
and he was quite possibly the sweetest man i'd had

895
00:37:36,360 --> 00:37:39,280
the pleasure of walking with, so naturally, when I didn't

896
00:37:39,280 --> 00:37:42,119
see him that morning, I was concerned. I figured he

897
00:37:42,159 --> 00:37:44,039
was going to say how he wasn't feeling too good,

898
00:37:44,119 --> 00:37:45,719
how he was going to take the day off, and

899
00:37:45,760 --> 00:37:47,360
as much as it was going to stop trying to

900
00:37:47,400 --> 00:37:49,360
find coverage for him, I was just glad to know

901
00:37:49,440 --> 00:37:51,519
that he was okay, but what he had to tell

902
00:37:51,599 --> 00:37:55,400
us was anything but reassuring. The message started with good morning, ladies,

903
00:37:55,639 --> 00:37:57,599
which made me smile right away because it was how

904
00:37:57,599 --> 00:38:00,119
he greeted us every morning. But then he went on

905
00:38:00,199 --> 00:38:01,880
to say, I'm reel sorry, but I don't think I'll

906
00:38:01,920 --> 00:38:03,719
be making it into work tomorrow morning. I'm going to

907
00:38:03,760 --> 00:38:06,440
see Sherry. I didn't know who the Sherry Pusson was,

908
00:38:06,480 --> 00:38:08,440
but I also wasn't super close with Greg, not like

909
00:38:08,480 --> 00:38:10,079
he was with the ladies who worked in the store's

910
00:38:10,119 --> 00:38:12,280
floor or registers, and so I went to ask them.

911
00:38:12,760 --> 00:38:14,760
I asked my co worker, a woman named Jeanine, who

912
00:38:14,760 --> 00:38:16,880
Sherry was in relation to Greg, and then a way

913
00:38:16,880 --> 00:38:18,800
that she looked at me told me almost everything I

914
00:38:18,880 --> 00:38:22,360
needed to know. Sherry was Gregg's wife, at least she

915
00:38:22,360 --> 00:38:25,039
had been until she passed away. I guess that doesn't

916
00:38:25,039 --> 00:38:26,920
make her not his wife, but you see what I mean.

917
00:38:27,519 --> 00:38:29,559
And so when he said he was going to see Sherry,

918
00:38:29,559 --> 00:38:31,079
I figured that he meant that he was going to

919
00:38:31,119 --> 00:38:33,679
visit her grave or something. But then when I said that,

920
00:38:33,679 --> 00:38:35,880
An expressed why, I wasn't sure that warranted a sick day.

921
00:38:36,000 --> 00:38:38,920
Jeanine totally agreed. She says it wasn't like Gregg to

922
00:38:38,920 --> 00:38:40,599
out of a call and sake, and he only ever

923
00:38:40,679 --> 00:38:43,360
visited Cherry's grave on the anniversary, the birthday and usually

924
00:38:43,400 --> 00:38:46,920
once around the holidays. I dun't ask Jeanine, well, what

925
00:38:47,039 --> 00:38:49,000
does it mean when he says he's going to see Cherry?

926
00:38:49,599 --> 00:38:51,480
And after she turned a whiter shade of pale, she

927
00:38:51,480 --> 00:38:53,760
simply responded with, I think you'd better go make some

928
00:38:53,840 --> 00:38:57,360
phone calls, to which I did. I called Greg on

929
00:38:57,480 --> 00:39:00,320
his cell maybe two or three times, hoping maybe he

930
00:39:00,400 --> 00:39:02,880
just wasn't hearing the phone, and I tried his home

931
00:39:02,920 --> 00:39:06,239
phone number, but again my calls went unnounswered. I put

932
00:39:06,239 --> 00:39:08,119
the phone down, and then I swear to God, not

933
00:39:08,159 --> 00:39:11,280
even two seconds goes by before it rings. I'm hoping

934
00:39:11,280 --> 00:39:14,960
it's Gregg, but it's not. It's Greg's son. Then why

935
00:39:14,960 --> 00:39:17,079
I asked if his dad was okay. He told me no,

936
00:39:17,320 --> 00:39:20,519
Greg was not okay. In fact, he passed away during

937
00:39:20,519 --> 00:39:23,159
the night. Gregg's son said that this is what he

938
00:39:23,199 --> 00:39:25,440
figured from having seen a scene appeared as dad of

939
00:39:25,519 --> 00:39:28,239
gotn a bunch of paperwork done, including his will, before

940
00:39:28,320 --> 00:39:30,159
laying down in an easy chair and just slipping away.

941
00:39:30,239 --> 00:39:33,760
During the night, He'd watered his house, plants, paid his bills,

942
00:39:33,880 --> 00:39:36,400
put on his best suit, and shined his shoes, And then,

943
00:39:36,440 --> 00:39:38,719
after leaving messages for us and one for his quiet

944
00:39:38,760 --> 00:39:40,639
director letting him know that he wouldn't need a right

945
00:39:40,679 --> 00:39:43,320
to practice, Gregg laid down in his recliner and just died.

946
00:39:44,000 --> 00:39:46,239
There was nothing to suggest that he'd expedited his exit,

947
00:39:46,440 --> 00:39:49,400
so to speak. There were no pills, no blood, no

948
00:39:49,519 --> 00:39:52,800
clear plastic bags or anything of that nature. Everything looked

949
00:39:52,920 --> 00:39:56,239
entirely painless and entirely natural. But then somehow I find

950
00:39:56,239 --> 00:39:58,679
that all the more haunting. The thing that scares me

951
00:39:58,760 --> 00:40:00,199
is sort of how he knew it was his time.

952
00:40:00,760 --> 00:40:02,960
Do we all know when we're close to death? And

953
00:40:03,079 --> 00:40:04,920
do we all feel so God uncheery about it? Or

954
00:40:04,960 --> 00:40:07,400
was Gregg just not afraid to go? The whole thing

955
00:40:07,440 --> 00:40:09,800
with Greg isn't the scariest thing that's ever happened to me.

956
00:40:10,400 --> 00:40:12,400
I've bean in a fourteen car palep where a family

957
00:40:12,400 --> 00:40:14,159
afore died, and let me tell you that was way

958
00:40:14,199 --> 00:40:16,920
more terrifying than finding out Gregg had passed away peacefully.

959
00:40:17,440 --> 00:40:19,639
But that accident doesn't stick with me the way Greg's

960
00:40:19,639 --> 00:40:22,000
sudden passing to us, and I guess that's because all

961
00:40:22,000 --> 00:40:24,360
of those unanswered questions regarding one of the few things

962
00:40:24,400 --> 00:40:27,960
we all share, man, woman or child, east or west,

963
00:40:28,280 --> 00:40:31,599
north or south are unthoppable and inevitable. End I know

964
00:40:31,679 --> 00:40:33,559
this is a bit of an unusual request, but I

965
00:40:33,599 --> 00:40:35,360
was hoping you could give me some advice on how

966
00:40:35,360 --> 00:40:38,159
to handle a situation with a male colleague of mine. Now,

967
00:40:38,199 --> 00:40:40,000
I'd rather not say where I live or work or

968
00:40:40,039 --> 00:40:42,599
anything like that. I'd like to just try and keep

969
00:40:42,599 --> 00:40:44,679
this as anonymous as possible. But here is the gist

970
00:40:44,679 --> 00:40:47,400
of my story. We first met when I started working

971
00:40:47,400 --> 00:40:49,639
at a large retail store that had lots of employees.

972
00:40:50,280 --> 00:40:52,119
He was the first person to really make an effort

973
00:40:52,119 --> 00:40:53,519
to be friendly with me, and I thought that we

974
00:40:53,599 --> 00:40:55,840
might end up being work friends, But I was wrong.

975
00:40:56,440 --> 00:40:59,039
It quite quickly progressed from him being warm but platonically

976
00:40:59,119 --> 00:41:01,280
friendly to ask him to go out for drinks with him.

977
00:41:01,719 --> 00:41:03,679
I wasn't looking for a relationship at the time, and

978
00:41:03,719 --> 00:41:06,119
I knew exactly what the implications of his invitation were,

979
00:41:06,159 --> 00:41:08,400
so each time he'd asked me, I politely declined helping.

980
00:41:08,400 --> 00:41:11,400
He'd eventually take the hint, but he didn't. He seemed

981
00:41:11,400 --> 00:41:13,000
to think that if he just kept asking that I'd

982
00:41:13,000 --> 00:41:15,760
eventually say yes. I didn't have the heart to tell

983
00:41:15,840 --> 00:41:17,199
him that I didn't like him like that, but I

984
00:41:17,239 --> 00:41:18,960
also didn't want to lie and say that I had

985
00:41:18,960 --> 00:41:21,320
a boyfriend. In the end, I thought the best thing

986
00:41:21,360 --> 00:41:23,239
to do would be to transfer to a different department,

987
00:41:23,280 --> 00:41:25,079
but it became this sort of cat and mass game

988
00:41:25,119 --> 00:41:27,159
of him following me wherever I went in terms of

989
00:41:27,199 --> 00:41:30,280
departmental transfer. In the end, I had to go to

990
00:41:30,440 --> 00:41:32,360
char about it, and only then did this stop his

991
00:41:32,440 --> 00:41:34,960
transfers without cluing him into the fact that I'd approached them.

992
00:41:35,400 --> 00:41:37,280
I'd made the mistake of giving him my phone number

993
00:41:37,280 --> 00:41:39,159
when I first arted, as he'd offered to work here

994
00:41:39,119 --> 00:41:41,679
any shifts I needed covering, But after realizing he was

995
00:41:41,679 --> 00:41:43,719
only going to use that to pester me, I blocked

996
00:41:43,719 --> 00:41:46,719
his number. I made my social media private, but he

997
00:41:46,800 --> 00:41:49,280
sent me a follow request anyways, and I chose to

998
00:41:49,320 --> 00:41:51,360
just ignore it once again, assuming that he'd have the

999
00:41:51,400 --> 00:41:54,639
emotional maturity to just understand his attention was not appreciated,

1000
00:41:55,199 --> 00:41:58,119
But again he did not. His increasing his stoker like

1001
00:41:58,159 --> 00:42:00,519
behavior wasn't all that much of a problem. At the time,

1002
00:42:01,119 --> 00:42:03,159
I'd made sure our two departments were just about as

1003
00:42:03,199 --> 00:42:05,320
far removed from one another as it was possible to be,

1004
00:42:05,559 --> 00:42:07,480
so it was like we bumped into each other often,

1005
00:42:07,920 --> 00:42:09,480
and when we did, it was just sort of a

1006
00:42:09,519 --> 00:42:11,320
smile and a not kind of exchange as we went

1007
00:42:11,320 --> 00:42:14,440
about our duties. That Then, one evening, after we'd all

1008
00:42:14,480 --> 00:42:16,239
closed up and I was walking to my car, I

1009
00:42:16,280 --> 00:42:18,079
looked up from my phone to see him standing near

1010
00:42:18,079 --> 00:42:19,880
my driver, as I'd like he'd been waiting for me.

1011
00:42:20,519 --> 00:42:22,280
It was early winter, so it had long gone dark

1012
00:42:22,320 --> 00:42:24,760
by the time we got out. I'd parked my car

1013
00:42:24,840 --> 00:42:26,760
quite far from the store, so there was hardly anyone

1014
00:42:26,800 --> 00:42:29,679
else around as I was walking, and then suddenly there's

1015
00:42:29,719 --> 00:42:32,400
my cheerful stalker who's basically cornering me in a dark

1016
00:42:32,440 --> 00:42:35,360
car park. I was a mix of startled and nervous,

1017
00:42:35,480 --> 00:42:37,079
but I just did what I usually did in that

1018
00:42:37,119 --> 00:42:39,159
sort of situation and tried to be as friendly and

1019
00:42:39,199 --> 00:42:42,239
disarming as possible. I asked what I could do for him,

1020
00:42:42,400 --> 00:42:45,239
and he started trying to make small talk. I humored

1021
00:42:45,320 --> 00:42:47,239
him for a moment or two, and then very politely

1022
00:42:47,239 --> 00:42:49,760
asked him what he wanted. Then When he asked if

1023
00:42:49,800 --> 00:42:51,480
I could give him a left home, I felt my

1024
00:42:51,559 --> 00:42:54,039
heart jump into my throat. I knew he lived on

1025
00:42:54,079 --> 00:42:56,039
my rat home close to it anyway, but I knew

1026
00:42:56,079 --> 00:42:58,760
he knew that too, So turning him dumb wasn't going

1027
00:42:58,840 --> 00:43:01,599
to be easy without cunning cross as rude or selfish.

1028
00:43:02,239 --> 00:43:04,480
So I'd note this also might seem like a perfectly

1029
00:43:04,480 --> 00:43:06,679
normal exchange, and I might seem selfish in not giving

1030
00:43:06,760 --> 00:43:09,599
him a left home, but this was not a normal exchange.

1031
00:43:09,599 --> 00:43:11,760
This guy couldn't take the hint that I wasn't into him,

1032
00:43:11,760 --> 00:43:13,760
so he clearly wasn't playing with a full deck. And

1033
00:43:13,840 --> 00:43:15,800
now he's blocking me from getting into my car in

1034
00:43:15,800 --> 00:43:17,800
a dark car park, after making sure that there's no

1035
00:43:17,800 --> 00:43:20,440
one else around but me and him. I'm not trying

1036
00:43:20,440 --> 00:43:22,119
to use this to slag off men, so please don't

1037
00:43:22,119 --> 00:43:24,960
think handing that. But sometimes guys just don't appreciate how

1038
00:43:25,000 --> 00:43:27,559
punt's shittingly terrifying that kind of behavior is to girls.

1039
00:43:28,199 --> 00:43:30,519
He was quite capable of overpowering me if he wanted to,

1040
00:43:30,719 --> 00:43:32,639
which is why I'd stay on my best behavior and

1041
00:43:32,719 --> 00:43:35,920
keep him sweet. But he made that very very difficult

1042
00:43:35,920 --> 00:43:37,840
for me. In part of me thinks he did it deliberately.

1043
00:43:38,440 --> 00:43:40,760
In the nicest voice I could possibly muster. I told

1044
00:43:40,840 --> 00:43:42,440
him I was too busy to give him a left,

1045
00:43:42,440 --> 00:43:44,400
and then made up some excuse about having to pick

1046
00:43:44,480 --> 00:43:47,119
up my mom from her friend's house. I just really

1047
00:43:47,119 --> 00:43:48,760
didn't want to be alone in the car with him.

1048
00:43:49,199 --> 00:43:51,400
I had visions of dropping him off his flat, asking

1049
00:43:51,440 --> 00:43:53,239
me to come inside, and then making a big scene

1050
00:43:53,239 --> 00:43:54,880
and refusing to get out of my car after I

1051
00:43:54,920 --> 00:43:57,280
rejected him, none of which I am emotionally equipped to

1052
00:43:57,280 --> 00:44:00,000
deal with, and so quite naturally, I didn't want him

1053
00:44:00,039 --> 00:44:02,960
anywhere I couldn't physically remove him, specially the passenger seat

1054
00:44:02,960 --> 00:44:05,559
of my car. I gave him my excuse, and he

1055
00:44:05,599 --> 00:44:07,320
seemed to take it in the chin, but then made

1056
00:44:07,320 --> 00:44:10,719
a sharp segue into the ignored Instagram follow request, and

1057
00:44:10,800 --> 00:44:12,840
when he asked me if I'd seen it, I lie.

1058
00:44:13,400 --> 00:44:15,320
I told him I hadn't and I'd been taking a

1059
00:44:15,320 --> 00:44:17,679
bit of a mental health break from social media, which

1060
00:44:17,719 --> 00:44:20,880
was partially true. He then counted that since we were colleagues,

1061
00:44:20,960 --> 00:44:22,400
to be nice to be able to keep in touch

1062
00:44:22,400 --> 00:44:25,920
on social media. I tried the path of least resistance

1063
00:44:25,960 --> 00:44:27,760
and told him I checked my install the first chance

1064
00:44:27,800 --> 00:44:29,880
I got. But then instead of leaving me alone, he

1065
00:44:29,920 --> 00:44:32,079
started asking about my phone number and why I wasn't

1066
00:44:32,079 --> 00:44:34,360
answering my phone. I had to tell him I got

1067
00:44:34,400 --> 00:44:36,880
any number and hadn't memorized it yet. But he smelled

1068
00:44:36,880 --> 00:44:39,480
the lion an instant, and in that moment, the way

1069
00:44:39,519 --> 00:44:41,760
he looked at me, she'll meet to the bone. Upon

1070
00:44:41,840 --> 00:44:44,320
detecting the light, the smile was immediately white from his face.

1071
00:44:44,920 --> 00:44:47,280
He went cheerful and warmed a frighteningly cold, and it

1072
00:44:47,320 --> 00:44:49,760
took just a second for it to happen. I started

1073
00:44:49,760 --> 00:44:52,239
to feel very unsafe around him. He said the calls

1074
00:44:52,239 --> 00:44:54,519
when connecting, but that the little robotic voice didn't say

1075
00:44:54,519 --> 00:44:58,000
the number wasn't in service. It said the person wasn't available.

1076
00:44:58,000 --> 00:45:00,880
And apparently my now not so cheerful Stocker understood the difference.

1077
00:45:01,519 --> 00:45:03,599
He started asking if I blocked his phone number, and

1078
00:45:03,639 --> 00:45:05,679
then before I could even answer, he asked, why did

1079
00:45:05,679 --> 00:45:08,079
you do that? What have I ever done to upset

1080
00:45:08,119 --> 00:45:10,760
you so much that you'd block my number? I tried

1081
00:45:10,760 --> 00:45:12,719
to dig myself out of the situation as best I

1082
00:45:12,719 --> 00:45:15,800
could by giving the sunniest, most non confrontational answer possible,

1083
00:45:15,920 --> 00:45:18,079
most of which involved me, claiming that I essentially was

1084
00:45:18,119 --> 00:45:20,480
a ditzy d who barely knew how Instagram a phone

1085
00:45:20,519 --> 00:45:23,559
carriers even worked. But that wasn't good enough for him.

1086
00:45:24,079 --> 00:45:26,800
He kept asking why and how in what questions, sometimes

1087
00:45:26,800 --> 00:45:28,760
without even letting my answer go from the previous, and

1088
00:45:28,800 --> 00:45:30,920
in and day completely lost my rag and I went

1089
00:45:30,960 --> 00:45:33,400
mental on him. I told him I wasn't into him,

1090
00:45:33,400 --> 00:45:35,000
and that he should have gotten the message weeks ago,

1091
00:45:35,039 --> 00:45:36,760
and that he needed to leave me alone or I'm

1092
00:45:36,760 --> 00:45:38,559
going to h R without telling him to be for

1093
00:45:38,599 --> 00:45:41,239
the second time, he gave a bit more math, asking

1094
00:45:41,280 --> 00:45:43,320
if I was messing around and if I was really

1095
00:45:43,320 --> 00:45:45,639
that petty, but he knew what he was doing. I

1096
00:45:45,760 --> 00:45:48,679
rejected him, and now he wanted to shame me. It

1097
00:45:48,760 --> 00:45:52,480
adouances old as time. Really, only after he was satisfied

1098
00:45:52,519 --> 00:45:54,639
with brating me did he relent and walk away, but

1099
00:45:54,679 --> 00:45:57,079
the damage had been done. I knowed that might sound

1100
00:45:57,079 --> 00:45:59,559
a bit overly sensitive, and I absolutely hate any kind

1101
00:45:59,559 --> 00:46:01,840
of conflict, and I find myself welling up with tears

1102
00:46:01,840 --> 00:46:04,519
every time the adrenaline starts to subside, and that incident

1103
00:46:04,559 --> 00:46:07,800
was no exception. It might sound naiven retrospect, but after

1104
00:46:07,840 --> 00:46:10,000
that I really did think it was all over. I

1105
00:46:10,079 --> 00:46:12,000
tried to be strong, but I think all my stocker

1106
00:46:12,039 --> 00:46:13,920
soul was weakness. And now I know his little car

1107
00:46:14,000 --> 00:46:16,119
park confrontation is only the beginning of what he had

1108
00:46:16,159 --> 00:46:18,599
in store for me. He was quiet for a while,

1109
00:46:18,800 --> 00:46:21,519
my stalker. I mean, he stayed away from me at work,

1110
00:46:21,559 --> 00:46:23,719
and whenever we did run into one another, he didn't

1111
00:46:23,719 --> 00:46:26,679
even acknowledge my presence, and it suited me. But I

1112
00:46:26,679 --> 00:46:30,199
could tell he felt severely humiliated. But to be brutally honest,

1113
00:46:30,360 --> 00:46:32,800
I didn't care. I wish he'd taken the hint way

1114
00:46:32,800 --> 00:46:34,880
back when he first started asking me out. But that's

1115
00:46:34,920 --> 00:46:37,719
just the way the cookie crumples sometimes, isn't it. And

1116
00:46:37,840 --> 00:46:40,079
the point is I thought it was over. I thought

1117
00:46:40,079 --> 00:46:43,360
he'd finally leave me alone, but he hasn't, and now

1118
00:46:43,360 --> 00:46:46,280
it's only gotten worse. Last week, I woke up in

1119
00:46:46,320 --> 00:46:48,039
the middle of the night I text on my phone.

1120
00:46:48,480 --> 00:46:50,159
I also needed to we so while I was there,

1121
00:46:50,199 --> 00:46:52,119
I checked the notification to see who it was from,

1122
00:46:52,119 --> 00:46:54,480
and saw it was from an unknown number. I was

1123
00:46:54,480 --> 00:46:56,559
half asleep when I first started reading it, but by

1124
00:46:56,559 --> 00:46:58,159
the time I was maybe two or three lines and

1125
00:46:58,199 --> 00:47:00,800
my heart was pounding. The Decks was from my stoker,

1126
00:47:00,840 --> 00:47:02,960
and it said something along the lines of hay my name.

1127
00:47:03,599 --> 00:47:06,000
I think I'm part next to your car. Do you

1128
00:47:06,039 --> 00:47:08,519
live at my address? Because I swear it to your

1129
00:47:08,559 --> 00:47:11,719
car I'm parked next to What are the chances? Huh?

1130
00:47:11,840 --> 00:47:13,480
He even sent a picture just to make sure that

1131
00:47:13,519 --> 00:47:15,320
I knew that he hadn't made some kind of mistake

1132
00:47:15,360 --> 00:47:17,519
or was just messing with me as revenge for scolding him.

1133
00:47:17,960 --> 00:47:20,800
My heart was in my throat again. I was wide awake,

1134
00:47:21,400 --> 00:47:23,920
a thousand million different questions all running through my head

1135
00:47:23,960 --> 00:47:25,599
at once, with the primary one being how the hell

1136
00:47:25,639 --> 00:47:28,559
did he find me? My overarching theory is that he

1137
00:47:28,599 --> 00:47:31,280
followed me home. He obviously got in self a car,

1138
00:47:31,320 --> 00:47:34,079
didn't he, And obviously, with me not talking to him,

1139
00:47:34,119 --> 00:47:35,960
there was no way of me knowing that he bought one.

1140
00:47:36,519 --> 00:47:38,519
He could have followed me home, been right behind me

1141
00:47:38,559 --> 00:47:40,559
the whole time, and unless I really looked into my

1142
00:47:40,599 --> 00:47:42,480
rear view to see who the driver's behind me were,

1143
00:47:42,519 --> 00:47:44,320
there's no way I'd have known that he was following.

1144
00:47:44,920 --> 00:47:47,280
I think I'd have figured that part out. The only

1145
00:47:47,320 --> 00:47:49,119
thing I can't figure out is what to do next.

1146
00:47:49,719 --> 00:47:51,320
I know this might be too much of an ass

1147
00:47:51,360 --> 00:47:53,840
But is it possible you could read this out let

1148
00:47:53,840 --> 00:47:56,000
your listeners know what I'm going through right now, and

1149
00:47:56,039 --> 00:47:57,840
then they could give me maybe the best advice in

1150
00:47:57,880 --> 00:48:01,000
the comments. I'm not talking about legal stuff either, because

1151
00:48:01,000 --> 00:48:02,719
I have absolutely no faith in a police to be

1152
00:48:02,760 --> 00:48:05,440
able to keep me safe. I also don't think moving

1153
00:48:05,480 --> 00:48:07,320
back in with my parents is an option because they

1154
00:48:07,360 --> 00:48:09,360
live within five minutes drive of the place we work,

1155
00:48:09,360 --> 00:48:11,280
and I don't want my car sitting outside the place

1156
00:48:11,280 --> 00:48:13,320
in the off chance my stalker spots and then knows

1157
00:48:13,320 --> 00:48:15,719
where they live to I'm more than willing to quit

1158
00:48:15,760 --> 00:48:17,559
the place where I work, and I think there's probably

1159
00:48:17,639 --> 00:48:19,719
what I'm going to do the first available opportunity. But

1160
00:48:19,760 --> 00:48:21,360
I just want to know if any one else has

1161
00:48:21,400 --> 00:48:23,559
had the same issue, doesn't have faith in the police

1162
00:48:23,559 --> 00:48:24,920
to put a stop to it, and ended up to

1163
00:48:24,960 --> 00:48:26,559
you in something that I don't know made it all

1164
00:48:26,599 --> 00:48:29,480
go away. Also, my dad's not around any more, but

1165
00:48:29,519 --> 00:48:31,360
I really don't want to tell my brother about this

1166
00:48:31,400 --> 00:48:33,360
because if I do, he'll probably just end up going

1167
00:48:33,360 --> 00:48:36,360
to prison. I just know he will. And they say

1168
00:48:36,400 --> 00:48:38,519
that because people are inevitably going to ask why don't

1169
00:48:38,519 --> 00:48:40,400
you get your dad or are the male relatives involved.

1170
00:48:40,400 --> 00:48:41,960
And the short answer to that this I don't have

1171
00:48:42,079 --> 00:48:44,760
any I know this probably wasn't the scariest thing you've

1172
00:48:44,800 --> 00:48:46,679
ever read, and I feel a bit weird sending it

1173
00:48:46,719 --> 00:48:48,559
to you when there's people who's leg it nearly died

1174
00:48:48,599 --> 00:48:51,920
and the experiences they tell you about. But please, when

1175
00:48:51,960 --> 00:48:53,760
I say I'm really scared, I mean it from the

1176
00:48:53,760 --> 00:48:56,360
bottom of my soul. I'm scared. This isn't going to

1177
00:48:56,400 --> 00:48:58,480
be something I laugh about in ten or fifteen years,

1178
00:48:58,559 --> 00:49:01,599
that obsessive admirer roll eyes about when my future husband

1179
00:49:01,599 --> 00:49:04,000
reminds me of it. I'm scared this is going to

1180
00:49:04,000 --> 00:49:06,360
be the last chapter of my short life. The sky

1181
00:49:06,480 --> 00:49:08,639
is escalating, and I really will try anything to make

1182
00:49:08,639 --> 00:49:10,880
it stop, because there's only one way these things end.

1183
00:49:10,880 --> 00:49:14,000
If that escalation doesn't stop, I'm scared. I don't think

1184
00:49:14,039 --> 00:49:15,719
I can even bring myself to say what that end

1185
00:49:15,719 --> 00:49:19,280
result might be. And that is the end. Thank you

1186
00:49:19,320 --> 00:49:29,280
for listening, and I will see you in the next one.