Speaker 1: You're watching Chewing the Cud with Mike, Benyon Rowe and
Speaker 1: Ben Smith. And then I felt it so like dribble
Speaker 1: down the side of my face. I opened my eye
Speaker 1: and it got in it burn and oh hello, well,
Speaker 1: welcome to Chewing the Cud. I'm again joined by the
Speaker 1: singing saxophonist extraordinaire that is Vnce Smith. Hello, Hi, Hi,
Speaker 1: love to be back. Good. I'm glad that you came back.
Speaker 1: We didn't have we didn't have to charge him or anything.
Speaker 1: That's true. I will expect parents later this week.
Speaker 2: I'm talking about a commerments of coin that looks slightly odd.
Speaker 1: And then we have our game to play in our
Speaker 1: Game of the week, and that's before vengeos is exactly
Speaker 1: what a top pop banger needs and teach me a
Speaker 1: lesson on screen. Now you can see all of our
Speaker 1: social media. Just search for at the Cud TV and
Speaker 1: as people who have.
Speaker 2: Popped up in our comments go along the bottom of
Speaker 2: the screen, it's time for Mike in the buzz.
Speaker 1: Going through customs. I'm assuming you've been through customs before.
Speaker 1: I have been through customs. Do you ever get the
Speaker 1: fear that they're going to stop you? Even if You've
Speaker 1: done nothing wrong.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, absolutely, I'm always really, especially when you have
Speaker 2: to walk through the the thingy, you know, the body scanner. Yeah,
Speaker 2: and you're like, lam all was like, am I done?
Speaker 1: Am I? Okay? Am I? You know? Are you going
Speaker 1: to feel me up? And can you if I ask
Speaker 1: her just a me thing? Then okay. What's the fun
Speaker 1: thing to do those body scanners is if you wear
Speaker 1: she was saying, an intimate item of ring design out
Speaker 1: of silicon, it doesn't set off the things, but it
Speaker 1: shows up on a body scanner. So sorry, you have
Speaker 1: to explain that further. What's that on a cockrow? Well,
Speaker 1: it's a small silicone oh rubber thing right that you
Speaker 1: put around your penis and testicle shaft to make things
Speaker 1: more enjoyable. Show me no, I can show you a picture,
Speaker 1: but it will be mine. But yeah, bodies kind of
Speaker 1: they show up and they automatically say can you come
Speaker 1: this way please, sir, and they then do feel you up.
Speaker 1: From what I've heard speaking from many years experience and
Speaker 1: not even getting on a flight, well, this is a
Speaker 1: story about Calvin Bassus, a great name, who basically was
Speaker 1: asked whether he was smuggling anything in his pants because
Speaker 1: they saw the shape of his python. Shall we say, right, Okay,
Speaker 1: it was actually three pythons he was smuggling. It wasn't
Speaker 1: his penis. There was actually three snakes. He was going
Speaker 1: from Montreal to New York and he decided, I'm going
Speaker 1: to smuggle these two and a half thousand pounds sneak
Speaker 1: things dan his trousers.
Speaker 2: Awake, awake, wiggly, wriggling, alight snakes and the plane that
Speaker 2: was a film it was yeah, real life.
Speaker 1: Yeah, two and a half pounds per snake. And he
Speaker 1: thought the best way of getting them into the country
Speaker 1: was in his pants.
Speaker 2: I mean, I mean, I feel like you wouldn't need
Speaker 2: to go through the scanner to see that something's going
Speaker 2: on downstairs or maybe it's okay, he's having a.
Speaker 1: He's having a great day. Was he wearing gray sweatpants?
Speaker 1: Will never know the question, but it's that it's three
Speaker 1: That's a lot to be smuggling in your pants. That
Speaker 1: is a lot to be I mean, smuggling anything in
Speaker 1: your pants. You know, that's brave. This feels very brave. Worldlinde.
Speaker 1: Stupidity or stupid, yeah exactly.
Speaker 2: I mean, well, you know, I wonder I wonder what
Speaker 2: they see a customs. They must do some interesting things,
Speaker 2: but it's probably a more interesting.
Speaker 1: Day thinking my looks. Yeah, he needs a pat down
Speaker 1: while look at them snakes. Have they escaped in the airport?
Speaker 1: Still there? No? No, they were caught as they were
Speaker 1: getting in. They were taking quarantine and put away. Yeah.
Speaker 1: He was then sentenced to five years in three years
Speaker 1: in prison and a five thousand dollars fine for smuggling snakes. Hey,
Speaker 1: don't do that again. So if you are going to
Speaker 1: smuggle snakes, not dan you pants. My first tip and
Speaker 1: the second tip, don't smuggle snakes. That's hard to say
Speaker 1: that smuggle snakes. Smuggling snake now that I have been
Speaker 1: caught anyway, moving on quite quickly from nicknames drugs, we're
Speaker 1: not smuggling them, offering or talking about not offering unless
Speaker 1: you want to paracetamol. I could do you a line
Speaker 1: of a broken if you've got time. It's a story
Speaker 1: about a priest who has been arrested for selling drugs. Okay, okay,
Speaker 1: specifically two ti of drugs, one viagra mm hmm and
Speaker 1: the other m d m A okay, yeah, sliding scales,
Speaker 1: sliding scale him and his friend whom he lived with,
Speaker 1: were both arrested. So it's like we're not saying that
Speaker 1: he was the lover, but a friend that he lived with,
Speaker 1: because he's a Catholic priest, was basically selling. Was selling
Speaker 1: via grant legally out of his home which is attached
Speaker 1: to the church, via people knocking on and via post.
Speaker 1: Oh wow. So people would text him saying can you
Speaker 1: send me a VIAGRAA and he would send it through
Speaker 1: the post.
Speaker 2: You know, there's like there's levels of this business exactly
Speaker 2: he's thought about it.
Speaker 1: There's you know, when they went in and they went, Okay,
Speaker 1: you're selling viagra and I like going and you've also
Speaker 1: got two and a half keel as a coat of MDMA.
Speaker 2: Here that's m h less viagra, bit more's less Viagora.
Speaker 1: Did you ever watch White Lotus. I've not watched White Loaders.
Speaker 2: There's a scene in that or yeah, in the in
Speaker 2: the program where vagra and MM are.
Speaker 1: Mixed up to catastrophic mixed up in a pot or
Speaker 1: mix up as that.
Speaker 2: No, it's like somebody thought they were taking viagra but
Speaker 2: then they were given an M instead, so you know,
Speaker 2: very different ends.
Speaker 1: Well, I mean, well I don't know. I mean they
Speaker 1: had a nice time, I.
Speaker 2: Guess, just a different experience from what they're expecting. So
Speaker 2: you know, all I'm saying, if I was to offer
Speaker 2: this price some advice, just be careful about labeling.
Speaker 1: I mean, viagra is a different shape to MDMA from
Speaker 1: my understand. Yes, I'll let you, I'll let you lead
Speaker 1: on from that. And yeah, if you know the difference
Speaker 1: between tablets and powders at the COTV on social media.
Speaker 1: And now we go over to our story of the week. Now,
Speaker 1: are you a driver? I am a driver.
Speaker 2: No car, no car can Okay, what's your most irritating
Speaker 2: traffic cause?
Speaker 1: Irritating traffic cause so you're stop stuck in traffic? Yeah,
Speaker 1: you find and it's like going, that's the one that
Speaker 1: irritates me the most.
Speaker 2: So for me, it's accidents, Yeah, I guess, I guess
Speaker 2: so that are like roadworks probably you know, something that's
Speaker 2: really just divert you in some ridiculous route that you
Speaker 2: can't get around.
Speaker 1: Road roadworks I'm okay with because they're trying to make
Speaker 1: the roads nico allegedly. But then it's the people have
Speaker 1: had accidents, but it's actually not that it's the people
Speaker 1: stopping to look at.
Speaker 2: The rubber rubber necking, So it's called stopping to look.
Speaker 2: It's really slow.
Speaker 1: Yeah, stopped looking, they're dead. Move on. I'm a joy
Speaker 1: in traffic okay, yeah, I'll avoid driving with you. Get
Speaker 1: a bit ragy now and again, Well, it's the story
Speaker 1: about people who were stuck in traffic behind two camels
Speaker 1: in London. So there were basically two people were riding camels.
Speaker 1: One was wearing a red packing the wall was gray.
Speaker 1: All right, so that's the the camel there.
Speaker 2: Yeah, surrounded by people wearing masks and playing loud music
Speaker 2: in east to figure in east Ham, in eastern yeah,
Speaker 2: actually down Newham High Street.
Speaker 1: Okay, yeah, I don't know, not on a camel, not
Speaker 1: in a camel, no any other dromedaries word. That's a
Speaker 1: good word. No, actually no, I wasn't offered such things.
Speaker 1: Have you been on the one four seven bus? Similar? Okay,
Speaker 1: because that's the one that was impacted. And this came
Speaker 1: about because basically they had camels, they were moving. They
Speaker 1: had to move them down the high street, so that's
Speaker 1: why they had to walk. But the interesting thing was
Speaker 1: that that bus behind them was filled with school kids
Speaker 1: and the reason why a bus full of school kids
Speaker 1: were like, oh, we got to stop behind some camels.
Speaker 1: Didn't go over very well, yeah, like come on, yeah,
Speaker 1: it's like, how are you all up with the same lie? Right?
Speaker 1: And it was only like the day after when it
Speaker 1: was in the news that the teachers.
Speaker 2: Went when they were believed, Oh, that detention shouldn't have happened,
Speaker 2: suspended all that.
Speaker 1: It's like, we've expelled all these children for throwing. Business
Speaker 1: has been canceled. No more camels. Christ we castled in March.
Speaker 1: We're really planning punishment. Now. There was some link in
Speaker 1: my brain to the kings and camels and Christmas. I
Speaker 1: don't know, I got it, but right, okay, right, Easter
Speaker 1: still going ahead, chockolate eggs, right, but in nine months
Speaker 1: you're going to be pissed off. But they are now
Speaker 1: stopped by a giant chicken. Mm hm. Then Eastern micro canceled. Okay,
Speaker 1: I don't know. I don't know what.
Speaker 2: I don't know what else is planned in Easter In
Speaker 2: terms of animals blocking busses rabbits?
Speaker 1: Is this a yearly event? Like? Can I get tick
Speaker 1: it gets to camel's walking? Just call them? Can I
Speaker 1: ride the camel. So they do actually sell camel rides,
Speaker 1: which is why they're moving them from one place to
Speaker 1: another and were in London or the camel rides not
Speaker 1: actually right, but like through London like this is a
Speaker 1: new tourist. Oh no, no, they had like a traveling
Speaker 1: fair kind of idea. Okay, so they had camels and
Speaker 1: they needed to move them from one location to that.
Speaker 1: It's very expensive to move things, so they just said
Speaker 1: they can walk, we can ride them good. You know, yes,
Speaker 1: what roads used to be for cameras they did, just
Speaker 1: not necessarily in this country, in London during the winter.
Speaker 1: We should we should change that, we should, I'd say
Speaker 1: camel ubers would now be a thing that yeah, that
Speaker 1: should be a thing. You know, we're getting very slow
Speaker 1: taxi or an uber.
Speaker 2: If you haven't got I mean, if they can stop
Speaker 2: traffic through and make the news, I'd say worth spending
Speaker 2: money on.
Speaker 1: You can probably walk it down the sidewalk, guitar work
Speaker 1: in the American company the pavement and not get pulled over.
Speaker 1: Quite possibly, Yes, some other things I've seen in that
Speaker 1: neck of the woods. Yeah, and then imagine being rear
Speaker 1: ended by a camel. But that's all from the buzz
Speaker 1: this week. Well, thank you for that camera based news.
Speaker 1: I enjoyed that. It's okay, our pleasure as always. But
Speaker 1: coming after this short break, it's vent and the show Business.
Speaker 1: You're watching in the cud with Ven and Mike. Now
Speaker 1: let's get ready for the show bus with then, so
Speaker 1: show business.
Speaker 2: There is a brand new coin in town. That's right,
Speaker 2: that has Are you into coins?
Speaker 1: No, well you should be. They are great. What are
Speaker 1: they great? Because they're around and they are money.
Speaker 2: Okay, you can spend this talk about it. But I
Speaker 2: do have a friend to collects coins. So if you're
Speaker 2: watching AUNT, this is specifically for you, I guess. So
Speaker 2: there is a new coin unveiled by the Mint which
Speaker 2: is a George Michael themed coin.
Speaker 1: I don't know if that is it. One of the
Speaker 1: snappy snaps.
Speaker 2: Yeah used, yeah, yeah, yeah, and people are unhappy. To
Speaker 2: be honest, that might have been better than what is
Speaker 2: actually on the coin, as you can see here. I mean,
Speaker 2: what is what is your impression of this image.
Speaker 1: Of the coin? It it looks like it that well. Yes.
Speaker 2: The reason why I don't want to say his name,
Speaker 2: his name is Robin Thick. Here is there because some
Speaker 2: people have been saying, does not look like George Michael,
Speaker 2: but in fact looks like Robin. I mean, I would
Speaker 2: say it kind of just I mean possibly, but it
Speaker 2: just is very good in general.
Speaker 1: No, it's got a hint towards George Michael.
Speaker 2: But it's not even just that. It's like the whole
Speaker 2: is the coin white itself. I just I don't know.
Speaker 2: It just feels like a bad design overall. I also,
Speaker 2: when I was looking at it before, I first thought
Speaker 2: that the bit behind was maybe supposed to be I was,
Speaker 2: I don't really know what'sto was maybe it's like a
Speaker 2: city scape, but as you have now realized, I think
Speaker 2: it's a neck of a guitar. And then those are
Speaker 2: supposed to be like sound waves.
Speaker 1: Oh right. I know he's a musician.
Speaker 2: He was a musician, and it's supposed to be related
Speaker 2: to Faith the song as well.
Speaker 1: So I guess that because that's like the wavefarm from Faith.
Speaker 2: Possibly that's cool, and I guess like the ear ring
Speaker 2: and that's what he was, But I don't know, it just.
Speaker 1: Doesn't work for me. It's a bit of a miss.
Speaker 1: It is a bit of a miss. I'm more excited
Speaker 1: about how do they get read onto a coin. Well
Speaker 1: exactly when did that start happening?
Speaker 2: And and yeah, so my question is I mean, I
Speaker 2: guess it's just a colectoy item. I don't think you
Speaker 2: can go to the shop and be like I would like, I'm.
Speaker 1: Not upsetting me. Why would you not? What Michael coin right,
Speaker 1: because most of the coins that you can get so
Speaker 1: it's like the Paddington Bear fifty psm, they're actually fifty
Speaker 1: p so you can go out and spend them spendable.
Speaker 1: I mean that it cost you five pounds to get one,
Speaker 1: So why you do that? I wouldn't know. But it's
Speaker 1: actually fifty p But what if it's worth that's the question.
Speaker 2: Maybe even though it doesn't say it, maybe it's a
Speaker 2: bound fifty five p.
Speaker 1: The roment have just blurred the lines.
Speaker 2: Oh yeah, yeah, Well it's all just a bit unfortunate,
Speaker 2: isn't It's very unfortunate? And who The thing with all
Speaker 2: this stuff is surely it has to it has to
Speaker 2: pass through quite a few people before they're like, yeah,
Speaker 2: we're we're totally happy of this.
Speaker 1: Everybody has said yes, George Michael's you know, like lots
Speaker 1: of people have got to approve it. Yeah, a few
Speaker 1: people for the coin, not some more.
Speaker 2: It's dirty, dirty money, but you know they all right.
Speaker 2: Moving on, So our next story is all about RuPaul.
Speaker 1: Oh, lovely, Lovely ru Paul.
Speaker 2: So, RuPaul has released a new memoir and in this
Speaker 2: has been quite open about addiction in the past, and which.
Speaker 1: I feel like he's maybe spoken about before.
Speaker 2: But perhaps maybe this is a bit more detail about
Speaker 2: all of this in the memoir, and so it's kind
Speaker 2: of been picked up by the media a little bit,
Speaker 2: and in particular sort of talking about buying a coke
Speaker 2: from this leaziest dealer in the House of Hidden Meanings,
Speaker 2: which is the name of the memoir. So I think
Speaker 2: they're for me. I don't know stories like this when
Speaker 2: they come out, I don't know. I quite I do
Speaker 2: quite like I think it can be sometimes can be
Speaker 2: quite inspirational in terms of like overcoming stuff and then
Speaker 2: seeing people where they are now and that you know.
Speaker 1: Things aren't always rosy.
Speaker 2: And Rupel's drag race Empire, you know there was a
Speaker 2: journey to get to that point. But how do you
Speaker 2: feel online journey and journey for RuPaul, how do you
Speaker 2: feel about that? Like in terms of celebrities, I guess
Speaker 2: in particular, but kind of sharing stuff like that from
Speaker 2: the past.
Speaker 1: I think it's always good when people can share best stories,
Speaker 1: especially about addiction and all the things that they've been through,
Speaker 1: because it kind of normalizes them a little bit. Because
Speaker 1: when you see RuPaul and the glamorous house and the
Speaker 1: big ranch that they've got and all.
Speaker 2: That sort of success and pracking huh crackinging?
Speaker 1: Have you ever seen.
Speaker 2: That that gone over the head that there's who was
Speaker 2: it Pepperin and Bob the drag Queen were talking about
Speaker 2: and he allegedly does fracking.
Speaker 1: There's a video of them laughing. Okay, okay, So I
Speaker 1: mean having been around for a lot of RuPaul's career,
Speaker 1: right back when RuPaul was Cupcake and part of the
Speaker 1: Club Kids, because I remember watching them on Ronaldo. That's
Speaker 1: how old I am. I've seen their career come along
Speaker 1: a long way. But you can definitely see in some
Speaker 1: of the earlier and some of the other clips that
Speaker 1: RuPaul had demons that they were fighting. But I think
Speaker 1: it's good that they're sharing and saying, look, this is
Speaker 1: what I've had to overcome, and that's the thing. And
Speaker 1: their partner was also George's it's also on f quite
Speaker 1: a lot.
Speaker 2: Yeah, yes, I think this is kind of part of that.
Speaker 2: And then the bit I'd read from the story kind
Speaker 2: of relates to that. How his partners, I guess in
Speaker 2: rehab at the time, but then we probably realized actually,
Speaker 2: oh I'm going through some stuff as well, and then
Speaker 2: needed to kind of get support.
Speaker 1: But yeah, I think, like, I think it's it's.
Speaker 2: Good to share that because it might be quite helpful.
Speaker 2: And I think it's just in general, it's the whole
Speaker 2: thing around slept in Fame is that it's not it's
Speaker 2: not overnight, right, you know, it's all everybody is starting
Speaker 2: from somewhere and you know, quite often quite a lot
Speaker 2: of hard.
Speaker 1: Stuff before we getting to the.
Speaker 2: To the glam point in Kardashian, less your Kardashian you know.
Speaker 1: Yeah, how about yourself? When's your memoir coming out? The
Speaker 1: Exploits of an Uninteresting Man already has a title, Yes,
Speaker 1: when coming out probably in about ten years post death. Okay, well,
Speaker 1: well we'll look forward to that. We're all looking forward
Speaker 1: to my death. Yeah, that's right. Thanks that. Moving on,
Speaker 1: it's not alive now, it's just towards the light, go
Speaker 1: towards the light right, all right.
Speaker 2: Moving on to somebody else who probably has a few memoirs,
Speaker 2: and it is there very much still with us and
Speaker 2: doing a stadium tour right now?
Speaker 1: Who am I talking about someone that's still with us
Speaker 1: in the stadium tour? Taylor Swift. Taylor Swift. Yeah, she's
Speaker 1: still there.
Speaker 2: But somebody, let's say, above the pop ladder and we're
Speaker 2: talking about Madonna.
Speaker 1: Oh, she's not still alive. She's been on an animatronic fu.
Speaker 1: I mean to prefair, that picture does look quite like it.
Speaker 1: That's that's a robot in a Madonna skin suit. But
Speaker 1: do people care they're paying the money to see her,
Speaker 1: stupidly playing the money to see her? You not, No,
Speaker 1: Well it's a lot of It's like five hundred pounds
Speaker 1: for a ticket. Yeah, I mean yeah, no, I wouldn't have.
Speaker 1: If someone gave me a ticket, I would go, oh yeah,
Speaker 1: someone gave me take it. That's a different matter. It
Speaker 1: needs to be from front as well, because I would go.
Speaker 2: To must things people give me a ticket. That's not
Speaker 2: just related to Madonna. How we got him here, gave
Speaker 2: him a ticket to the studio and he walked in.
Speaker 2: It was brilliant, you know, just fight me on the street.
Speaker 2: It was a raffle ticket. It wasn't even a ticket.
Speaker 2: It's like clock Room forty two. It came in not
Speaker 2: even a five or zero waiting for my prize. Listen, Well,
Speaker 2: the Madonna ticket will get you a full old shebang
Speaker 2: of a show, I imagine. But there's been a bit
Speaker 2: of controversy around the current Stadium.
Speaker 1: Tour where as part of it there is kind of
Speaker 1: a montage, I.
Speaker 2: Guess, which is dedicated to people who have died of AIDS.
Speaker 2: And in this there's been a bit of a blunder
Speaker 2: because Luther van Ross has appeared on this, and so
Speaker 2: there's been some backlash because Luther van Ross did not
Speaker 2: have AIDS, does not die of it, and was never
Speaker 2: officially not that this is actually necessarily the same thing,
Speaker 2: but and I guess was never officially out in life.
Speaker 2: So there's been a bit of a backlash around this,
Speaker 2: and again kind of similar to the coin situation. I
Speaker 2: thought immediately was like, again, how many people not passing through?
Speaker 2: But how many people have? How I had to look
Speaker 2: over this, how many people did loop of Van Ross
Speaker 2: go through? How many people have said, yes, we're absolutely
Speaker 2: fond of this visual whatever, and there's no problems here.
Speaker 2: It's got to the point where you know it's in
Speaker 2: a show. And then I guess somebody's been like, hold
Speaker 2: on a minute. Although I have to say if I
Speaker 2: was part of the team, I don't know if I
Speaker 2: want to knock on Madonna's door and be like, sorry,
Speaker 2: just just let you know you've got this a little
Speaker 2: bit wrong.
Speaker 1: So it's from what I'm saying this, there's a big
Speaker 1: tableaus that come from the ceiling behind Madonna. Do you
Speaker 1: want to know? Just don't put the picture in? Yeah,
Speaker 1: don't tell. I mean, yeah, how much is she actually
Speaker 1: involved in any of that? How much is she conscious?
Speaker 1: Right now? Is an animatronic robot in a Madonna's skin suit?
Speaker 1: She doesn't care? This is live now. Actually it sounds yeah.
Speaker 1: She just did some new batteries, the Energizer Bunny Madonna.
Speaker 2: Hey, well, Madonna, that's all we have for you on
Speaker 2: the show business.
Speaker 1: That's always interesting to know that basically Madonna's dead. We'll
Speaker 1: stick around because coming up next we have an and
Speaker 1: the game of the week. You're watching you in the cud. Now.
Speaker 1: We spent some time cramming last week, but as we
Speaker 1: aren't quite done, and we're going to quiz each other
Speaker 1: on l g B t q I A factoids as
Speaker 1: we play gay or Ney. So then it's off for
Speaker 1: you to pop off again. Off, I pop off your pop. Okay,
Speaker 1: pop pop, I go again O week So same game
Speaker 1: as last week. Okay, we've got questions. We're going to
Speaker 1: quiz each other to make sure we've got our l
Speaker 1: g B t q I A plus history down as
Speaker 1: it were. Are you ready, young man? I am ready.
Speaker 1: He's all man. We made sure of that isn't my
Speaker 1: dating profile. It was said for a US presidency candidate
Speaker 1: when it asked their son was gay? Which president was that? Hmmm,
Speaker 1: he wasn't Orange. He wasn't Orange, wasn't Orange Clinton? Clinton
Speaker 1: has a daughter? Great? Yeah, it was Ronald Reagan, lovely
Speaker 1: friend of thatcher Ronald Reagan. Yes, actor Ronald Reagan basically
Speaker 1: was saying about whether his son was gay or not.
Speaker 1: Short it turned out.
Speaker 2: His son was, well, you know, stranger things have happened,
Speaker 2: but it helps to be all mad gay. How did
Speaker 2: the test just saying testes, testes, That's where it comes
Speaker 2: from it to say.
Speaker 1: Ready for me? I am ready for you? Great. I
Speaker 1: feel like I'm just not doing very well. Knowledge. These
Speaker 1: are quite you know, there's some challenges in here, I say,
Speaker 1: definitely some challenges.
Speaker 2: Yeah, But this one's about the Kinsey scale. I would
Speaker 2: say arguably everybody's favorite type of scale. On that scale,
Speaker 2: what number represents someone who only has romantic feelings for
Speaker 2: the same sex?
Speaker 1: Looking for a number on that scale? Romantic feeling? Romantic feelings, yes,
Speaker 1: as in you want to take them out for dinner
Speaker 1: or you want to eat them out. I don't know,
Speaker 1: depends how romantic you are in your dates. It's a
Speaker 1: strong word what I do.
Speaker 2: So you're after a number, I'm after a number, yes,
Speaker 2: please seventeen. No, I mean I actually don't know the
Speaker 2: number is that we're going from the scale if it
Speaker 2: did not research properly before this. But we're looking for
Speaker 2: the number six. So you know that is not the
Speaker 2: number that you said, So.
Speaker 1: You're wrong, Like the musical six, that's.
Speaker 2: Right, Like the musical six, that's right. On a scale,
Speaker 2: I can tell you a little bit more of you're interested.
Speaker 2: Absolute heterosexuality is zero, an absolute homosexuality is six.
Speaker 1: So you know this is the top of the scale.
Speaker 1: Six six is the top. Yeah, that's right. Six is
Speaker 1: the top? How do you feel about that? Definitely not six.
Speaker 1: So that's that's a really short scale. It is a
Speaker 1: short scale. Heterosexuality is zero. There's not much wriggle room.
Speaker 1: The bisexuality is about a what three? Two? Yeah? Or
Speaker 1: is it you're just going zero? Zero point zero one?
Speaker 1: No longer? That's right? So zero to sixty and three
Speaker 1: point five leanna, all right, so if you want me
Speaker 1: to shut up, dear right, okay, moving on in nineteen nineteen.
Speaker 1: In fifteen thirty three, King Henry the Eighth created the
Speaker 1: Buggery Act, which was not oh it was a penalty, okay,
Speaker 1: which was a crime in England. I thought it was
Speaker 1: an act of boger. I was like, going, well done you,
Speaker 1: King Henry the Eighth, thank you very much. Love. They've
Speaker 1: been doing it before. What was the penalty foresaid act
Speaker 1: for buggery? Just say buggery again? Buy, I don't know
Speaker 1: what it is buggery in a Scottish Actince sounds like
Speaker 1: a lovely word, buggery, ugury? Have you ever buggered? No?
Speaker 1: Have I been? Personal question? Answered just right? What was
Speaker 1: was the question? Who am I? What are we doing? Bugger?
Speaker 1: Penalty for taking up the rogan from King the right
Speaker 1: to become one of his sex slaves. The way you
Speaker 1: read that, it was like watching the news slightly wrong. No,
Speaker 1: death was the answer.
Speaker 2: Wow, whether you were topping or bottomy, so what either?
Speaker 1: So everybody verse was screwed. Really gosh. But it's because
Speaker 1: in Rome, on the Vatican State even they used to
Speaker 1: use something called the Pope's pair, which was basically a
Speaker 1: boot plug mm. They used to pop inside you and
Speaker 1: then turn it and it'd expand and rip you asunder. Yeah,
Speaker 1: so it's it's basically extreme fisting. It's just like a
Speaker 1: Saturday well once a month. Maybe no one needs that
Speaker 1: much fiber in the diet. Have you got one for me? Now? Right?
Speaker 1: I do. Now I'm looking for another number here.
Speaker 2: I know you like those sixty nine correct, great, there,
Speaker 2: but there may well have been some sixty nine's in
Speaker 2: this situation. How many men were in the elite homosexual
Speaker 2: group of soldiers. I know you're getting excited formed by
Speaker 2: Gorgodas in three seven eight BCE, although it'll be dead now.
Speaker 1: I was packing their bags, I was booking holiday. Where's
Speaker 1: gorged as I'm going? Exactly where is that? I'm not sure?
Speaker 1: How many? How many men elite homosexual groups. How many
Speaker 1: men in a group? Buggery, lougery? It does it sounds
Speaker 1: like a food substance. I'm sorry I did with buggery.
Speaker 1: It's in the thebes, thiebes, thebes, as in Gypsy's Champson.
Speaker 2: Yep see possibly the Roman Empire somewhere, says a voice
Speaker 2: in my ear.
Speaker 1: So I'm thinking, what's the sensible number of honey men
Speaker 1: all together? And then doubling it?
Speaker 2: So eight hundred and nineteen okay, specific I feel like
Speaker 2: you've thought about this number before, But.
Speaker 1: How did I double it again? Add number?
Speaker 2: There's the question unfortunately not that many, but also still sizable.
Speaker 2: You know, might entertain you for a weekend, perhaps three
Speaker 2: hundred One night.
Speaker 1: You said the weekend, just the weekend? What weekend? Let's
Speaker 1: not work on the slightly answer and they here? Okay,
Speaker 1: moving on? When was the do you know when the
Speaker 1: first game has been marched? Was in Washington? What do
Speaker 1: you mean? Washington State, Washington DC, Washington d C. I'm
Speaker 1: gonna say so nineteen.
Speaker 2: Seventy eight, Oh my god, eight, I was wrong as
Speaker 2: nineteen sixty five. I actually legitimately got excited there and
Speaker 2: thought I wondered why I was moving forward with my
Speaker 2: life and things hadn't been erased, and that you know,
Speaker 2: existence had meaning. So your next question is Dr Tom Waddle,
Speaker 2: a member of the nineteen sixty eight Olympic team, started
Speaker 2: the Gay Games, which is an international sporting event held
Speaker 2: every four years. Originally it was to be called the
Speaker 2: Gay Olympics, but the name was changed for which reason.
Speaker 1: The Olympic Committee didn't like reminding people that the Olympics
Speaker 1: were originally all men were around naked.
Speaker 2: Hmmm, I mean that is quite a plausible answer, but.
Speaker 1: Not the one. I'll be right.
Speaker 2: Infringement now, although not that far off, really the answer,
Speaker 2: unless you'd like to take any other guesses.
Speaker 1: They were scared that the javelin throwers would be excited.
Speaker 1: I don't know, you're still thinking about those three hundred soldiers.
Speaker 2: So the United States Olympic Committee requested a federal injunction
Speaker 2: against using the name Olympic for this group. So they
Speaker 2: were just being a bit pretty and rubbish abo using
Speaker 2: the name.
Speaker 1: I think.
Speaker 2: One wonders why the USC never brought up these of
Speaker 2: the term One wonders, I wonder or whoever wrote this.
Speaker 3: One one does wonder why one does wonder actually why
Speaker 3: they've not stopped the use of Olympics when it comes to,
Speaker 3: for example, dog Olympics, police Olympics, nude Olympics.
Speaker 1: First of all, I did not know there was a
Speaker 1: newtles to you and I sat here overb watching the
Speaker 1: nood Olympics. Have you been in it? No? No, no, no, no.
Speaker 1: One wants to see this, dude. The dog Olympics is
Speaker 1: and other options. I could say, I blindfollowed myself come
Speaker 1: out of the shower, just in case.
Speaker 2: Well, those Olympics exist it maybe for another year, four
Speaker 2: years training stick around.
Speaker 1: Whose coming up next? We're going to get taught some
Speaker 1: things in it. Teach me a lesson. Welcome back to
Speaker 1: you in the CUD. Now we're going to learn exactly
Speaker 1: how we produce a song worthy of Eurovision. As we
Speaker 1: talked to then in teach me a lesson the song
Speaker 1: smith ory Hm, I believe that's a word. That's right.
Speaker 1: It's our last name, song smith Rye is songsmith ry
Speaker 1: shortened to smith exactly. I'm a smith, a smith of songs. Yes, lovely,
Speaker 1: so quite recently you have been involved with the Eurovision,
Speaker 1: that is right. Yeah, it was very exciting, totally what happened.
Speaker 1: How did you get involved? Oh, well, it all began
Speaker 1: so there.
Speaker 2: Well, Eurovision has always been something that I've watched in
Speaker 2: so as kids, so and I kind of love it,
Speaker 2: love to hate it, but also love to love it.
Speaker 1: Particularly I just love it. Not even that much of
Speaker 1: a secret.
Speaker 2: But the small country of sam Marino, which is like
Speaker 2: a landlocked country in Italy because they're so small, they
Speaker 2: open up the applications for any musicians across the world
Speaker 2: to take part in their own competition to then represent
Speaker 2: the country in Eurovision. So I entered this and then
Speaker 2: I could have and think much more about it. And
Speaker 2: then but got through to the first round, which is
Speaker 2: very exciting. So I had to do an online edition
Speaker 2: back at the start of this year of my own tunes,
Speaker 2: and then just before I moved to Manchester, then I
Speaker 2: got word that I was through to the semi finals,
Speaker 2: so I had to go to their live TV show
Speaker 2: in San Marino was it wasn't live then, but it
Speaker 2: was recorded, and then the finals live.
Speaker 1: So yeah.
Speaker 2: Then within a week I had to get a whole
Speaker 2: new song together again an outfit.
Speaker 1: Together of which this is actually a part of.
Speaker 2: And then yeah, fly to Italy. Then get myself to
Speaker 2: sam Reno and take part in the competition. So it
Speaker 2: was but yeah, what an amazing experience. Kind of like
Speaker 2: absolutely bonkers, as you might expect anything Eurovision adjacent to be,
Speaker 2: but yeah, like a really really amazing thing to be
Speaker 2: part of.
Speaker 1: Cool. So you said, you apply, How do you apply?
Speaker 1: How do you find out how to apply?
Speaker 2: So I'd originally heard about it through another artist in London.
Speaker 2: I was living at London time and he had been it,
Speaker 2: so he's called Aaron Sibley, and so it was on
Speaker 2: my radar, this is something that you could maybe do.
Speaker 2: And then they just opened at some point they opened
Speaker 2: up like an application format and literally anybody can can
Speaker 2: reply to it. You have to submit your songs and
Speaker 2: then that go through a panel. So yeah, I was
Speaker 2: just like, well, you know, why not that could be
Speaker 2: kind of fun. And then so in this so when
Speaker 2: I got through to semifinals, I was by that point
Speaker 2: I was the only UK representative still in the competition,
Speaker 2: which is quite cool, and I went so I very
Speaker 2: much went UK, but also I was going with this
Speaker 2: being Scottish thing as well, so.
Speaker 1: That I had the kill on I imaginally let I
Speaker 1: got quite a lot.
Speaker 2: Of Scottish press for being in the competition as well,
Speaker 2: which is kind of lovely, which I hadn't expected at all.
Speaker 1: So it's like one of these things. I think people.
Speaker 2: Maybe like make fun of your vision, but actually if
Speaker 2: there's like maybe an element of somebody I don't know,
Speaker 2: somehow getting through that might represent you, then.
Speaker 1: Everyone's can lay, Oh that's amazing, that's fun.
Speaker 2: So yeah, I went through, I got got a new
Speaker 2: song together for it, and then did the competition. Unfortunately
Speaker 2: didn't make it to the finals. But hey, I was
Speaker 2: actually I surprised myself at how gutted I was.
Speaker 1: I was there.
Speaker 2: I was like, do you know, actually I really would
Speaker 2: love this, But it's fine. It's kind of spurred me on.
Speaker 2: I'm now like, in the back of my mind, maybe
Speaker 2: there's still away from me to get into your vision somehow,
Speaker 2: even if it's like being a songwriter or working with
Speaker 2: some other people. So my next Eurovision plan is that
Speaker 2: I work with some artists in different countries, so a
Speaker 2: lot of them have their own competitions to find the
Speaker 2: representative for the country before the final thing, not like
Speaker 2: the UK who just pays some money and gets in.
Speaker 2: You know, a lot of them work their way into
Speaker 2: that Eurovision place. So I'm gonna try and collaborate with
Speaker 2: some other artists in different countries.
Speaker 1: Cool. So you said you put the song together specifically
Speaker 1: for your vision. How did you come up with the
Speaker 1: idea for that? How did you quote with that song idea?
Speaker 1: So quickly?
Speaker 2: I had some songs like working like in my demo
Speaker 2: folder that we were just never recorded and hadn't been
Speaker 2: released yet, so I knew that was going to be
Speaker 2: one of those. So I did already have like an
Speaker 2: idea of a song kind of sitting there. And then
Speaker 2: I have a producer that I worked with, and I
Speaker 2: was like, hey, so we have a week. Can we
Speaker 2: produce the song and make it like a Eurovision worthy thing?
Speaker 2: And so there's quite there's like some specifications well as
Speaker 2: well for Eurovision song. It's probably the same for most countries,
Speaker 2: but for Sam Reno, so three minutes is the maximum.
Speaker 2: So we're talking you know, pop in the sort of
Speaker 2: quick quick pop world and three minutes being maximum, So
Speaker 2: you're really got to get in there with your idea
Speaker 2: and your hooks and your churus. It's going to be
Speaker 2: pretty much like wham bam, this is the song. You know,
Speaker 2: no messing around, wham bam, I just boom, bang and
Speaker 2: bang went in my head.
Speaker 1: Yeah, well exactly, so that's very your vision. But yeah, okay, cool.
Speaker 1: So you already had this idea of a song that
Speaker 1: you wanted to put together, watch the producer, you went
Speaker 1: over there and performed it. And when you when you
Speaker 1: performing in front of a staged audience or live audience,
Speaker 1: what's that like?
Speaker 2: M Well, I think that for your vision as well,
Speaker 2: Like it's it isn't just music. Some would argue sometimes
Speaker 2: it's not music, but like a bigger part of the
Speaker 2: thing is that, I guess the TV program essentially as well.
Speaker 2: So like the visual in the staging is as much
Speaker 2: a part of a Eurovision song and performance as anything else.
Speaker 1: I think the magic could.
Speaker 2: Comes when you, you know, you get a legitimately good
Speaker 2: song that meets with like some pretty cool staging and
Speaker 2: well fought out stuff, even if it's absolutely bonkers, but
Speaker 2: like when it kind of comes together, that's when you
Speaker 2: can kind of get some magical Eurovision moments.
Speaker 1: Sometimes it doesn't.
Speaker 2: In either way, but you know, often, I mean you'll
Speaker 2: often think if you think about Eurovision for me anyway,
Speaker 2: you sometimes probably think more about the visual and the
Speaker 2: staging than actually the songs themselves. So I guess that
Speaker 2: was that was my initial thought, is like, Okay, this
Speaker 2: is a song, but how am I going to like
Speaker 2: present myself and do it?
Speaker 1: So so yeah.
Speaker 2: So the outfit was part of it, so that the
Speaker 2: kill is something I performed anyway, So I was like, okay,
Speaker 2: I need to go of this. I need to kind
Speaker 2: of get some other bits and bobs go the color
Speaker 2: themes of purple being my my theme. And so the
Speaker 2: song that I wrote is called Jumper, so I was like,
Speaker 2: I need to have a jumper. So the idea, it's
Speaker 2: kind of like a queer love song. Essentially, an idea
Speaker 2: is in the chorus. It's like it's kind of like
Speaker 2: a sweet sentiment. But I so I want to wear
Speaker 2: your jumper? Is that idea?
Speaker 1: It's like I wrote it after watching Heart Stopper? Did
Speaker 1: you ever watch so?
Speaker 2: I binge watched like the second series of that after
Speaker 2: coming back from music festival. I was already quite tired
Speaker 2: and emotional anyway, then watch that and I was like, oh, exactly,
Speaker 2: and then wrote this song and I was kinda like,
Speaker 2: you know, imagine if I was a teenager now, like
Speaker 2: being able to actually have like a boyfriend when I
Speaker 2: was a teenager and learning a lot of those hard
Speaker 2: lessons about love at that time. So it's kind of
Speaker 2: it came from that angle of like sort of almost
Speaker 2: like I wish I'd been able to do all those
Speaker 2: things that you might have done when you're a teenager
Speaker 2: exploring love, but I couldn't necessarily do when I was that.
Speaker 1: Obviously a passion for Eurovision, I mean obviously from the
Speaker 1: jumper as well, with the hearts of the Eurovision so much.
Speaker 1: The Gallery of even made sure that we've got the
Speaker 1: Eurovision logo flying up in the back of the show here.
Speaker 2: Yeah, it's beul it's a choice.
Speaker 1: Well, you know, hearts are you know, hearts are the
Speaker 1: things that's for a big thing, especially for Eurovision. And
Speaker 1: you said that, you know, in the future you'd like
Speaker 1: to work with collaborations and stuff with other people. What
Speaker 1: do you think of this year's UK entry?
Speaker 2: So I actually was just listening and watching the video
Speaker 2: before I came to see you.
Speaker 1: So I I think it's it's pretty good.
Speaker 2: I think as in terms of the history of UK entries, go,
Speaker 2: I think it's pretty good. Song and it's likely Aside
Speaker 2: from your vision, I think it's pretty good pop pop song,
Speaker 2: Cyndi pop. It's all the kind of things that I
Speaker 2: can love in pop music anyway, And I think all
Speaker 2: the Alexander is like a very great performer, likable performer,
Speaker 2: So I think it's potential to do well. I don't
Speaker 2: think it's a winner, but I think I'll do pretty well.
Speaker 2: Like the music video stuff so well, it's quite cool,
Speaker 2: like quite so be interesting to see what the actual
Speaker 2: staging is of the show in itself. I think in
Speaker 2: some ways though, like that almost is maybe a bit
Speaker 2: of a hurdle that when you get straight you have
Speaker 2: to go straight into the final. You don't get the
Speaker 2: chance to kind of test things out in like the
Speaker 2: semi finals and kind of learn and grow.
Speaker 1: So you can just have to come in. But yeah,
Speaker 1: I like it. How what do you feel about it? So? Okay, song,
Speaker 1: it's it's very much. It's all the Alexander, and I
Speaker 1: love all of Alexander for all their political messages as
Speaker 1: well as the music. It's just very much. Is it
Speaker 1: a standout? I don't think. I don't think we're gonna win.
Speaker 1: Oh no, I wouldn't. I think this is. It's definitely
Speaker 1: not Katrina energy. It's not to that level. And we
Speaker 1: keep irritating the rest of Europe. So that's why we're
Speaker 1: never actually going to win. But maybe they'll let you
Speaker 1: keep Ukraine win again. I mean quite possibly two albums
Speaker 1: this year exactly. But yeah, So that Eurovision hit that
Speaker 1: you've made, what's going to happen with it? Thank you
Speaker 1: for calling it hit? You're gonna put it in the bin.
Speaker 2: No, it's going to come out. So I'm going to
Speaker 2: release it in April. So I because it all happened
Speaker 2: so quickly. All I had together is basically backing track,
Speaker 2: so I need to now finish like the main vocals.
Speaker 2: And I play saxophone as well, so I've got that
Speaker 2: on on there. So I'm gonna get all that tidied
Speaker 2: up and then we'll release it in in April as
Speaker 2: a fun little.
Speaker 1: Thing that happened because of your vision. So cool. On
Speaker 1: what's the song called Someone's called Jumper?
Speaker 2: You know?
Speaker 1: Okay, that's what you've got to watch over And where
Speaker 1: will it be available? Will be available on all your
Speaker 1: usual streaming services Spotify, Apple, et cetera. Whatever. Listen to
Speaker 1: your music wonderful, perfect and if we wanted to reach
Speaker 1: out and grab you on the social media is how
Speaker 1: could we do that? Sure, please do reach out and
Speaker 1: grab me. I'm the only fans link for.
Speaker 2: You can grab me at Ven Smith on all the
Speaker 2: socials and on Spotify, et cetera. So it's ve double
Speaker 2: N like event diagram I'd like to describe it as,
Speaker 2: and then Smith with a Y.
Speaker 1: Thank you very much. You are very welcome. So that
Speaker 1: is almost the end of the show.
Speaker 2: Just remember to join us on our social media here
Speaker 2: at the cud TV.
Speaker 1: Thank you for watching. How We'll see you all soon. Bye, goodbye,