WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.560 --> 00:00:02.279 Hey, guys, Before we get started, I want to warn 2 00:00:02.319 --> 00:00:05.839 you this episode contains a lot of talk about sexual assault, 3 00:00:06.400 --> 00:00:10.119 a lot of talk about sexual abuse. It also talks 4 00:00:10.320 --> 00:00:20.079 about some really graphic medical situations and self harm, including suicide. 5 00:00:21.199 --> 00:00:23.000 And if any of those things would be a hard 6 00:00:23.000 --> 00:00:25.000 listen for you, skip this one and I'll see you 7 00:00:25.000 --> 00:00:35.240 in the next one later. Hey guys, Princess here and 8 00:00:35.280 --> 00:00:39.439 welcome to another episode of By Pumpkin Bonus Edition. So 9 00:00:40.159 --> 00:00:44.880 today we're gonna talk about Lenda Dunham's book. Normally, I 10 00:00:44.880 --> 00:00:47.759 know Liz talked about this yesterday. Normally I don't like 11 00:00:47.840 --> 00:00:50.920 to do that with podcasts I listened to, like Liz 12 00:00:50.960 --> 00:00:52.840 and Kara's. I don't like to talk about the same 13 00:00:52.840 --> 00:00:56.880 thing they're talking about because it feels like, sometimes it 14 00:00:56.920 --> 00:00:59.960 feels like I don't know whether that's my opinion or 15 00:01:00.200 --> 00:01:03.600 that's something that I heard from somebody whose opinions like 16 00:01:03.759 --> 00:01:06.439 I usually align with, And so I don't like to 17 00:01:06.480 --> 00:01:08.400 do that. I like to give myself space with it. 18 00:01:08.680 --> 00:01:10.480 But I just finish it this week, and I have 19 00:01:10.519 --> 00:01:14.200 a lot of thoughts on and I interact with Lena 20 00:01:14.280 --> 00:01:17.799 Dunham differently than Liz does, and so I think that 21 00:01:19.319 --> 00:01:22.040 I think, while we have similar opinions, I think that 22 00:01:22.079 --> 00:01:24.959 the things that I'm going to stay here are different 23 00:01:24.959 --> 00:01:28.959 than what Liz is saying. I So, first of all, 24 00:01:30.120 --> 00:01:32.439 why did I read this book? Liz suggested it to me. 25 00:01:33.480 --> 00:01:38.480 I didn't have shit else to do, and it's interesting 26 00:01:38.519 --> 00:01:41.200 to me. And I listened to it by audiobook because 27 00:01:41.200 --> 00:01:44.799 that's how I listen to nonfiction stuff. It's I mean, 28 00:01:44.840 --> 00:01:48.079 And to be completely honest, Lena is not a great narrator. 29 00:01:48.120 --> 00:01:56.879 Sheet her voice is very monotone. For this right, I 30 00:01:58.120 --> 00:02:00.840 measure all audio books by the standard that Mariah Carey, 31 00:02:03.079 --> 00:02:06.120 that Mariah Carey set with the meaning of Mariah, and 32 00:02:06.159 --> 00:02:10.439 that Mariah is interacting with the content as she is 33 00:02:10.479 --> 00:02:13.840 writing it, as she's reading it. She sounds like she's 34 00:02:13.879 --> 00:02:17.479 talking to me as a posed so she sounds like 35 00:02:17.520 --> 00:02:20.639 she's reading something, and Lena sounds like she's reading something. 36 00:02:21.159 --> 00:02:24.960 And while that would be fine, Lena wrote it, so 37 00:02:25.599 --> 00:02:27.919 it feels like she's very disconnected from the words that 38 00:02:27.960 --> 00:02:33.680 she put together. But I read this book, but not 39 00:02:33.759 --> 00:02:36.800 Lindy West's book. I'm not going to read Lindy West's book. 40 00:02:37.080 --> 00:02:42.080 I you know, obviously, if you were around ten years ago, 41 00:02:42.280 --> 00:02:46.240 fifteen years. Yeah, you couldn't get away from Lindy West. 42 00:02:46.599 --> 00:02:51.639 She was a premier feminist voice in on the Internet. 43 00:02:51.759 --> 00:02:53.879 And while I've enjoyed a lot of what she's written, 44 00:02:54.319 --> 00:02:56.919 especially she God, I wish I knew the name of 45 00:02:56.960 --> 00:02:59.360 this book. There's just a set of essays that I 46 00:02:59.400 --> 00:03:04.400 really enjoy and one of them is about, uh, fuck, 47 00:03:04.560 --> 00:03:06.719 I'm gonna have to I'm gonna have to look this up. 48 00:03:10.680 --> 00:03:21.280 Let's see here, Lindy West, Harrison Ford, The Fugitive, that move. 49 00:03:21.360 --> 00:03:25.360 She does an essay on that fucking movie The Fugitive 50 00:03:25.960 --> 00:03:28.039 that At the end of the essay I was writing, 51 00:03:28.120 --> 00:03:30.479 I was like, she is correct, that is the best 52 00:03:30.520 --> 00:03:33.439 movie of all fucking time. She has all the correct 53 00:03:33.439 --> 00:03:37.080 opinions on Harrison Ford, who I haven't thought about since 54 00:03:37.240 --> 00:03:42.000 I was obsessed with Indiana Jones series. Here she is okay, 55 00:03:42.360 --> 00:03:44.479 like she that is some of the best writing I 56 00:03:44.520 --> 00:03:48.639 have ever read. Like, I'm sorry, it was just so 57 00:03:48.960 --> 00:03:53.400 fucking good. And in terms of like you know, I've 58 00:03:53.479 --> 00:03:55.520 enjoyed her work before, I don't want to read this 59 00:03:55.639 --> 00:03:58.439 last book because, and you guys know how I feel 60 00:03:58.520 --> 00:04:03.159 about polyamory and open relationships. I feel like they are 61 00:04:03.199 --> 00:04:07.960 a neutral. That's a neutral relationship structure. There's no moral 62 00:04:09.080 --> 00:04:12.759 there's no morality behind any of those things. It's it's like, 63 00:04:13.439 --> 00:04:15.199 do you want a red car or do you want 64 00:04:15.199 --> 00:04:18.439 a blue car? Choosing either one doesn't matter, right, It 65 00:04:18.480 --> 00:04:20.720 doesn't make you a good or a bad person. It's 66 00:04:20.759 --> 00:04:25.120 not exploitative, it's not there's nothing. It's neutral. Okay, pick one. 67 00:04:25.319 --> 00:04:34.759 But I have found, anecdotally, okay, that almost every person 68 00:04:34.920 --> 00:04:37.279 I have come into contact who is in one of 69 00:04:37.319 --> 00:04:38.800 those relationship and open about it, because a lot of 70 00:04:38.800 --> 00:04:41.000 people aren't. Right. People don't tell you some of your 71 00:04:41.040 --> 00:04:43.000 mama's and daddy's in an open relationship. You just don't fucking 72 00:04:43.040 --> 00:04:49.240 know about it. That I have come upon exist because 73 00:04:49.439 --> 00:04:52.240 one person wanted to do it and the other person 74 00:04:52.319 --> 00:04:57.240 wanted to stay in a relationship. Almost always, I'm sure 75 00:04:57.279 --> 00:04:59.959 you could name some examples, even in I want to 76 00:05:00.040 --> 00:05:02.800 I'm saying, come across, even in pop culture, even in 77 00:05:02.839 --> 00:05:08.439 my internet travels, very rarely were people like two people like, yeah, 78 00:05:08.519 --> 00:05:11.240 we would love to do this together. You know what, 79 00:05:11.839 --> 00:05:13.680 I think this is gonna work for our relationship, and 80 00:05:13.680 --> 00:05:15.680 the other one's like, yeah, of course it is. I 81 00:05:15.680 --> 00:05:17.759 don't know why we weren't doing it before, and then 82 00:05:17.759 --> 00:05:20.800 they're doing it. Everyone's being ethical and open and everything, 83 00:05:21.360 --> 00:05:24.680 and I want to be clear, they're The absence of 84 00:05:24.759 --> 00:05:27.040 jealousy does not mean that it's a good relationship, and 85 00:05:27.160 --> 00:05:29.399 the presence of jealousy doesn't mean it's a bad relationship. 86 00:05:29.480 --> 00:05:34.600 Jealousy is a normal fucking human emotion. Okay, But everybody's 87 00:05:34.639 --> 00:05:38.079 into it, everybody. It's working great, everybody's really happy and 88 00:05:38.079 --> 00:05:41.079 feeling fulfilled. I have never come upon that. I have 89 00:05:41.160 --> 00:05:49.199 come upon people saying that they have that without without 90 00:05:49.199 --> 00:05:52.480 confirmation from the other person. And I know someone's gonna 91 00:05:52.480 --> 00:05:54.279 be like, well, that's what monogamy is like too, it is. 92 00:05:54.920 --> 00:05:57.839 I'm not. I'm not. This is not me being like 93 00:05:58.000 --> 00:06:00.600 monogamy is what you all should be doing. No, I'm 94 00:06:00.680 --> 00:06:04.439 just saying that anecdotally. That's what it seems to be 95 00:06:04.720 --> 00:06:06.959 every time I come across it, and I think that's 96 00:06:07.000 --> 00:06:10.040 fucked up. I don't think you should be I don't 97 00:06:10.040 --> 00:06:11.720 think you should get married just because the other person 98 00:06:11.759 --> 00:06:13.079 wants to get married. I don't think you should be 99 00:06:13.120 --> 00:06:16.240 exclusive just because the other one is exclusive. I don't 100 00:06:16.240 --> 00:06:18.680 think you should bring another person in your relationship just 101 00:06:18.720 --> 00:06:21.160 because the other one wants to. And that's what's going on, 102 00:06:21.240 --> 00:06:24.519 Lindy West. I know she's saying something otherwise, you need 103 00:06:24.560 --> 00:06:26.920 more people to be maybe we don't believe you. This 104 00:06:27.000 --> 00:06:31.279 is even the way I've read certain excerpts, and I 105 00:06:31.360 --> 00:06:34.199 know that's not the whole of the book, but even 106 00:06:34.240 --> 00:06:39.480 the way she's writing about it sounds like she sounds 107 00:06:39.519 --> 00:06:42.240 like she don't believe it right. And the story she's 108 00:06:42.279 --> 00:06:46.160 telling about how you know he already started this without 109 00:06:46.160 --> 00:06:49.680 telling her. They that's cheating. And remember I told you 110 00:06:50.279 --> 00:06:56.600 infidelity is not well sexual infidelity is not the worst 111 00:06:56.600 --> 00:06:58.720 thing that can happen in your relationship. It's the worst 112 00:06:58.759 --> 00:07:00.240 thing I happen my relationship, but it's it's not the 113 00:07:00.279 --> 00:07:03.480 worst to happen in your relationship. People can be unfaithful 114 00:07:03.519 --> 00:07:06.480 in a million fucking ways, and some of it worse 115 00:07:06.560 --> 00:07:13.279 than that, worse than like fucking somebody. But that the 116 00:07:13.360 --> 00:07:16.360 story she is telling doesn't track with the feelings that 117 00:07:16.360 --> 00:07:18.680 she wants us to feel about it, And I'm like, Okay, 118 00:07:18.720 --> 00:07:21.920 so you should have written is better. And so I 119 00:07:22.000 --> 00:07:24.360 don't want to be a part of that discourse. I 120 00:07:24.439 --> 00:07:26.560 don't want to read that fucking book. I don't want 121 00:07:26.560 --> 00:07:28.519 to read that book and come out feeling sorry for her. 122 00:07:29.079 --> 00:07:31.040 I don't think she deserves that. I don't think that's 123 00:07:31.079 --> 00:07:36.839 helpful to her. I think that's kind of yeah. And 124 00:07:39.600 --> 00:07:43.879 she is someone who really and she talked about this, 125 00:07:43.959 --> 00:07:46.519 she's talked about this a number of times. Really, the 126 00:07:46.639 --> 00:07:52.040 fact that that man wanted to beat they are non binary, 127 00:07:52.199 --> 00:07:57.160 that that person wanted to be with her. Really, we'll 128 00:07:57.160 --> 00:07:59.879 talk about this with Lena as well. Really like proved 129 00:08:00.160 --> 00:08:03.000 the world that, like, she's lovable. She's a fat person 130 00:08:03.079 --> 00:08:06.759 and she's lovable, and look, here's the proof. This person 131 00:08:06.839 --> 00:08:09.279 wants to be with me, wants to be married to me. 132 00:08:10.199 --> 00:08:15.920 And I'm like, I don't like that. And it seems 133 00:08:15.959 --> 00:08:19.680 like you held on to that a lot and then 134 00:08:20.199 --> 00:08:27.519 got scared to lose it. And now they and their 135 00:08:27.560 --> 00:08:31.279 girlfriend who's now your girlfriend, are living in your home 136 00:08:31.399 --> 00:08:38.639 and you're writing essays about how you decided that you 137 00:08:38.720 --> 00:08:42.000 were in love with that girl after your partner had 138 00:08:42.039 --> 00:08:49.600 been sleeping around behind your back with him. I don't know, 139 00:08:49.720 --> 00:08:52.759 girl down, that's what it seems like. And so I'm sorry, 140 00:08:52.799 --> 00:08:54.360 I'm not gonna I'm not gonna come over there and 141 00:08:54.360 --> 00:08:56.279 spit on you when you down, go be down, and 142 00:08:56.360 --> 00:09:01.600 don't let me read this book. I saw a thread 143 00:09:01.679 --> 00:09:04.159 a thread post where someone was like, you, guys, don't 144 00:09:04.200 --> 00:09:08.879 respect the fact that she's queer and that these people fuck. 145 00:09:09.320 --> 00:09:13.639 She wants to be there. Baby. If you think rubbing 146 00:09:13.679 --> 00:09:20.440 your genitals together means that everything's all cool, I would 147 00:09:20.679 --> 00:09:24.480 love to introduce you to the millions of people in 148 00:09:24.600 --> 00:09:28.200 terrible relationships who are still fucking. That doesn't mean she 149 00:09:28.279 --> 00:09:30.559 wasn't coorsed in it. That doesn't mean she's sitting there 150 00:09:30.840 --> 00:09:33.240 trying to tell a lie to us and herself. But 151 00:09:33.279 --> 00:09:36.399 I'm not buying it, So just tell it to yourself. Fine, 152 00:09:36.440 --> 00:09:40.120 that's where you want to be. Be there, but don't 153 00:09:40.200 --> 00:09:44.799 make me. Don't make me hear but it. I feel 154 00:09:44.799 --> 00:09:47.279 the same way about Becky G. You guys know I 155 00:09:47.320 --> 00:09:48.960 love me some Becky G. I think she is the 156 00:09:49.000 --> 00:09:54.399 hottest thing fucking walking. I'm sew into her. The two 157 00:09:54.440 --> 00:09:56.639 songs she's releasing, one's coming out this Friday and the 158 00:09:56.720 --> 00:09:58.480 other one came out I guess a couple of days ago. 159 00:09:58.639 --> 00:10:01.440 They sound so good. I only wished the best for her. 160 00:10:03.159 --> 00:10:06.960 Her performance at Coachella with Carol with kyl Gee is 161 00:10:07.039 --> 00:10:11.559 like she was so great. Even when she was shading 162 00:10:11.559 --> 00:10:14.399 the mariachi's, you could tell she was pissed at Carol. 163 00:10:14.559 --> 00:10:17.960 She wouldn't hold her hand she was shading to mariachi 164 00:10:17.960 --> 00:10:20.919 because what happened afterwards came out that there was an 165 00:10:20.960 --> 00:10:26.679 all female mariachi band on the stage, and like in 166 00:10:26.720 --> 00:10:29.120 between Coachella weekends, it came out they were like Trump supporters, 167 00:10:29.600 --> 00:10:34.799 and like, I know, Becky was lying, not on my watch, 168 00:10:34.840 --> 00:10:36.519 and so she was real pissed the second weekend. I 169 00:10:36.519 --> 00:10:38.519 love Becky G Beggy G want to call her daddy 170 00:10:38.600 --> 00:10:40.679 not too long ago, and she talked about a lot 171 00:10:40.679 --> 00:10:43.519 of things when she talked a lot about that fucking 172 00:10:43.519 --> 00:10:45.879 relationship she's in, which I told you he cheated on 173 00:10:45.919 --> 00:10:50.279 her very very publicly, and she took him back, and 174 00:10:50.919 --> 00:10:54.679 everybody's upset about that. And I told you that I 175 00:10:54.799 --> 00:10:57.039 know why she took him back because her mother and 176 00:10:57.120 --> 00:11:00.840 father were in a twenty year relationship marriage in which 177 00:11:00.879 --> 00:11:02.399 her father was a drug at it. And she know 178 00:11:02.480 --> 00:11:05.200 her mother all the time and her grandmother and her 179 00:11:05.240 --> 00:11:07.559 mother would say, you gotta put on your boxing gloves 180 00:11:07.600 --> 00:11:10.399 to Savior to fight for your That's what she saw. 181 00:11:11.200 --> 00:11:12.960 And she'd been with that guy for so long. Like 182 00:11:13.399 --> 00:11:16.919 I understand, I get it, but I wish to fucking 183 00:11:17.000 --> 00:11:20.320 god you would not get on my internet and you 184 00:11:20.399 --> 00:11:24.759 misuse therapy speak. That's what she did. She was us 185 00:11:24.840 --> 00:11:27.320 misusing therapy speak. And a lot of people are like, 186 00:11:27.360 --> 00:11:29.240 her therapist is terrible. I don't know that her therapist 187 00:11:29.279 --> 00:11:31.519 is terrible. Remember, your therapists can only talk about what 188 00:11:31.559 --> 00:11:33.799 you bring. They they only know your perspective, and they're 189 00:11:34.200 --> 00:11:38.879 not supposed to be there to decide who's right and wrong. 190 00:11:39.000 --> 00:11:42.159 They're supposed to work with you on you and what 191 00:11:42.240 --> 00:11:45.559 you think and your th like. It's not really about that. 192 00:11:46.559 --> 00:11:49.120 It's not a like and a lot. And if your 193 00:11:49.159 --> 00:11:52.480 therapist is like like, giving a lot of judgment in 194 00:11:52.519 --> 00:11:57.000 your in your sessions, that don't coincide with what like, 195 00:11:57.279 --> 00:11:59.240 they're not asking you what you think and trying to 196 00:11:59.440 --> 00:12:03.600 and trying to, you know, break that down about where 197 00:12:03.600 --> 00:12:06.159 you're coming from, and instead they're giving you all their opinions. 198 00:12:06.240 --> 00:12:12.440 It's probably not very good therapy, right, But so I 199 00:12:12.519 --> 00:12:14.720 don't think her therapist should be fired. What I do 200 00:12:14.759 --> 00:12:19.879 think is that Becky g has gas lit herself into one. 201 00:12:20.480 --> 00:12:23.879 She this is her fault too. She has a on 202 00:12:24.000 --> 00:12:27.440 her healing journey is like opening like she was just 203 00:12:27.480 --> 00:12:31.120 misusing a lot of therapy speak to justify a lot 204 00:12:31.120 --> 00:12:34.399 of weird fucking moving right, you move in weird, bitch, 205 00:12:35.120 --> 00:12:38.200 And when I when they ask you about it, you 206 00:12:38.320 --> 00:12:41.080 start talking like fucking I was gonna say doctor Phil, 207 00:12:41.120 --> 00:12:43.519 but doctor Phil was not a doctor, and most of 208 00:12:43.559 --> 00:12:47.120 his stuff was like do not have sex with your cousin. 209 00:12:47.279 --> 00:12:49.720 That's that's essentially. He just yell out stuff like that, 210 00:12:50.159 --> 00:12:53.559 like hmm, drugs are bad, like that was what he 211 00:12:53.720 --> 00:12:56.960 was saying. But I but again, oh, maybe doctor Phil 212 00:12:57.080 --> 00:13:00.480 was your therapist. I don't fucking know. And I want 213 00:13:00.480 --> 00:13:04.879 to point out something. I don't want to bully Becky 214 00:13:04.919 --> 00:13:07.639 g about staying with that man. She ain't making her choice. 215 00:13:07.759 --> 00:13:09.159 Maybe I don't think it's where she should be, but 216 00:13:09.200 --> 00:13:12.120 it's right where she fucking wanna be. So let her 217 00:13:12.120 --> 00:13:14.600 be there. And I don't think I would do it 218 00:13:14.679 --> 00:13:16.320 in her real life too. I've grown up. I've grown 219 00:13:16.360 --> 00:13:18.480 up too much to be sitting around telling people what 220 00:13:18.639 --> 00:13:20.519 I think about their relationship. You ask me a question, 221 00:13:20.559 --> 00:13:23.600 I'll give you an answer. But I support you, and 222 00:13:23.639 --> 00:13:27.000 that's it. I love you, and that's it. And so 223 00:13:27.399 --> 00:13:29.399 I want to be here with you when you finally 224 00:13:29.440 --> 00:13:34.840 realize that this isn't good enough for you anyway. I 225 00:13:34.919 --> 00:13:37.879 want all of us to take a page out of 226 00:13:37.919 --> 00:13:43.159 Beyonce's book. Beyonce definitely stayed with a man who cheated 227 00:13:43.159 --> 00:13:46.720 on her, and she wrote a whole album about the shit, 228 00:13:47.200 --> 00:13:50.320 an amazing about the shit. But Beyonce has never sat 229 00:13:50.360 --> 00:13:52.399 down with us and told us why she stayed with 230 00:13:52.480 --> 00:13:56.120 jay Z because she knows that no answer she gives 231 00:13:56.200 --> 00:14:00.600 us is gonna be good enough for us. Nothing. There 232 00:14:00.679 --> 00:14:04.759 is no combination of words she can say that would 233 00:14:04.759 --> 00:14:07.240 make that sound like a good idea to any of us, 234 00:14:08.080 --> 00:14:10.559 except for people that are like in the sunken place already. 235 00:14:10.600 --> 00:14:14.360 You know, Okay, so then she doesn't do it. I'm 236 00:14:14.360 --> 00:14:16.000 not saying she's not my man, my man, my man, 237 00:14:16.039 --> 00:14:19.200 she's my man, my man, my man, final boss. But 238 00:14:20.320 --> 00:14:23.279 she has never tried to explain to us why she 239 00:14:23.320 --> 00:14:26.000 stayed with him. You can infer it from her music 240 00:14:26.279 --> 00:14:29.559 if you want to, but she has never sat down 241 00:14:29.679 --> 00:14:32.679 and been like, hey, guys, this is why I had 242 00:14:32.720 --> 00:14:37.519 to stay. And she basically left us with the idea 243 00:14:37.639 --> 00:14:40.080 I just wanted to and that's what I wanted BECKYGI say, 244 00:14:40.080 --> 00:14:42.799 and I call her daddy interview. I just wanted to. 245 00:14:43.960 --> 00:14:46.279 I don't have anything to prove. I don't have anything, 246 00:14:46.639 --> 00:14:48.559 any evidence that I could show you that you guys 247 00:14:48.600 --> 00:14:53.120 would be like, oh okay, I wanted to. So I did, 248 00:14:54.200 --> 00:14:58.240 and I'm working my way back based on that. That's 249 00:14:58.240 --> 00:15:01.000 where my heart was, and so I stayed there. And 250 00:15:01.039 --> 00:15:02.919 there's nothing anybody can say about that. That's just this. 251 00:15:03.240 --> 00:15:05.320 But mostly I don't wanna hear any more about this man. 252 00:15:05.840 --> 00:15:08.320 I don't wanna hear any fucking more about this man. 253 00:15:08.759 --> 00:15:11.559 I want to hear. I want another documentary from her. 254 00:15:11.559 --> 00:15:14.000 Rebecca was so great. I want another documentary. I wanna 255 00:15:14.039 --> 00:15:16.639 see her like making an album or like on the 256 00:15:16.759 --> 00:15:21.840 road to uh like I wanna I want the documentary 257 00:15:21.840 --> 00:15:24.399 to follow her in her concerts tour. I like, I 258 00:15:24.559 --> 00:15:26.879 love something like that. I wanna hear more music from her. 259 00:15:27.039 --> 00:15:29.639 I wanna see more cunty looks from her. I wanna 260 00:15:29.759 --> 00:15:32.879 see that, Like. I don't give a fuck about that man, 261 00:15:33.080 --> 00:15:35.120 And you shouldn't have to go on an apology tour 262 00:15:35.200 --> 00:15:37.120 about that man. He needs to go on a fucking 263 00:15:37.120 --> 00:15:40.200 apology tour. Tell him to get on all the soccer podcasts, 264 00:15:40.240 --> 00:15:42.399 and when he gets on there, talk about how he 265 00:15:42.440 --> 00:15:44.559 fucked up and what he's doing and the other like, 266 00:15:45.320 --> 00:15:47.960 let him do that. That's not for you to answer 267 00:15:48.080 --> 00:15:51.840 for and you can't answer for it. There's nothing you 268 00:15:51.840 --> 00:15:54.279 can fucking say. That's how I feel about Lindy West. 269 00:15:54.279 --> 00:15:56.759 That's how I feel about Beyonce. And the only of 270 00:15:56.840 --> 00:15:58.679 the of these three, the only person that's doing it 271 00:15:58.720 --> 00:16:02.240 right is Beyonce. She ain't gonna tell me shit because 272 00:16:02.360 --> 00:16:04.080 once she don't like to talk to us, but then 273 00:16:04.159 --> 00:16:07.639 two nothing she say is gonna is gonna make it better. 274 00:16:07.679 --> 00:16:10.879 There's nothing to say. She decided that's what she's doing 275 00:16:11.240 --> 00:16:14.320 the end. Why am I talking about that? Oh? I 276 00:16:14.320 --> 00:16:18.559 started talking about I started reading lind I read Lena 277 00:16:18.600 --> 00:16:20.960 Dunham's book, right, I did not read Lindy West. But 278 00:16:21.000 --> 00:16:23.720 isn't that interesting that they're both Like, it's like a reunion, 279 00:16:24.240 --> 00:16:29.559 all these internety feminist writer, voice of generations coming out, 280 00:16:30.039 --> 00:16:32.600 voice of the fat people of coming out. It's like 281 00:16:32.639 --> 00:16:36.919 a reunion. All right, let's talk about my relationships, my 282 00:16:37.000 --> 00:16:40.480 relationship with Dina with Lena Dunham, and my biases and 283 00:16:40.480 --> 00:16:42.720 all this sort of stuff before we get started I 284 00:16:42.840 --> 00:16:46.039 don't keep up with Lena Dunham. I never did, not really. 285 00:16:48.039 --> 00:16:52.360 First of all, Girls was not a quintessential mirror of 286 00:16:52.399 --> 00:16:54.559 my life. When Girls came out, I was in my thirties, 287 00:16:54.559 --> 00:16:57.080 I was living in Queens and community of Brooklyn and 288 00:16:57.240 --> 00:17:00.039 those twenties girls. First of all, they're all white. You 289 00:17:00.080 --> 00:17:02.399 know black people on the show, by the way, I 290 00:17:02.440 --> 00:17:05.400 know that's a criticism of them, but the people writing 291 00:17:05.440 --> 00:17:09.599 it didn't know any black people. Okay, that wasn't a 292 00:17:09.599 --> 00:17:11.559 real thing in their world. And I don't want Lena 293 00:17:11.599 --> 00:17:14.720 Dunham writing black people, not at all. And I don't 294 00:17:14.759 --> 00:17:18.960 count Childish Gambino being in the opening of one of 295 00:17:18.960 --> 00:17:21.720 those seasons. I don't count that. In fact, I don't 296 00:17:21.720 --> 00:17:24.359 know what he knows. He's never mind. Let me stop 297 00:17:24.359 --> 00:17:26.200 talking about him before he show up here and start 298 00:17:26.200 --> 00:17:29.359 telling me about how how the girls did the black 299 00:17:29.359 --> 00:17:31.400 girls didn't like him in middle school? He was in anime? 300 00:17:31.880 --> 00:17:34.880 Is that why he didn't like you? Everybody loves fucking anime? 301 00:17:35.160 --> 00:17:37.160 What are you talking about? Which anime were you into? 302 00:17:37.559 --> 00:17:40.880 Let's talk about that? Was it weird shit with a 303 00:17:40.920 --> 00:17:47.240 lot of boobs? And what was never mind? Never mind? Mind? 304 00:17:47.359 --> 00:17:49.440 The white girls didn't like me, and that's why I 305 00:17:49.440 --> 00:17:52.119 hate black woman. Okay, cool, cool, cool, coo cool. Anyway, 306 00:17:53.359 --> 00:17:57.720 I don't want Lena Dunham writing black people. Sure, the 307 00:17:58.839 --> 00:18:01.079 writer's room could be a little more firstified, and we could, 308 00:18:01.480 --> 00:18:07.039 but they were writing about a very specific type of woman, 309 00:18:07.279 --> 00:18:10.839 young woman in Brooklyn in the in during that time, 310 00:18:11.000 --> 00:18:16.200 and that young woman didn't know any black people. She 311 00:18:16.200 --> 00:18:20.440 didn't interact with any Sometimes it might be their job, 312 00:18:20.519 --> 00:18:23.519 but the bodega didn't have anybody that wasn't white in it. 313 00:18:23.960 --> 00:18:25.799 The people they walked passed on the street didn't have 314 00:18:25.799 --> 00:18:30.640 nobody that wasn't white in Okay. I never was like 315 00:18:30.839 --> 00:18:33.720 this is written wrong. I was like, this is a documentary. 316 00:18:34.160 --> 00:18:36.839 That girl exists. I don't know her because she don't 317 00:18:36.960 --> 00:18:39.960 know what black people. But I did I watch Girls. Yeah, 318 00:18:40.240 --> 00:18:43.160 I've watched Girls through maybe two or three times actually, 319 00:18:43.720 --> 00:18:45.559 and there are things that I took away from it. 320 00:18:45.640 --> 00:18:49.240 I enjoyed most of it. I too wanted to kill 321 00:18:49.279 --> 00:18:52.839 myself as Marnie was singing that fucking Kanye song while 322 00:18:52.880 --> 00:18:55.200 she was trying to get back that dude, and I 323 00:18:55.319 --> 00:18:58.720 thought that. I also think that episode where it's panic 324 00:18:58.799 --> 00:19:01.079 in Central Park, everything is I thought that was an 325 00:19:01.160 --> 00:19:06.680 excellent episode, beautifully directed, like tightly written. I thought it 326 00:19:06.759 --> 00:19:12.400 was great, but it just didn't go I didn't look 327 00:19:12.440 --> 00:19:14.440 at it and go, oh, this is exactly what the 328 00:19:14.440 --> 00:19:16.640 fuck I'm going through right now, and I see myself 329 00:19:16.640 --> 00:19:19.079 in these characters and my friends in these because I didn't. 330 00:19:19.960 --> 00:19:22.960 I didn't. I saw those characters around me, but they 331 00:19:22.960 --> 00:19:27.440 were not people that I connected with emotionally, and for 332 00:19:27.519 --> 00:19:30.039 some people it was that it wasn't my thing. I look, 333 00:19:30.319 --> 00:19:32.039 I was trying to think of what my girls would 334 00:19:32.039 --> 00:19:34.799 have been, and I can't really think about anything like 335 00:19:34.839 --> 00:19:39.000 in my twenties that maybe insecure, but I wasn't in 336 00:19:39.000 --> 00:19:41.920 my twenties an insecure amount insecure was really I was like, oh, 337 00:19:41.960 --> 00:19:44.000 I feel all of this, but I think the thing 338 00:19:44.400 --> 00:19:48.000 the way people are rabbit about girls, I think I 339 00:19:48.200 --> 00:19:50.319 was about my so called life. When it came out, 340 00:19:50.880 --> 00:19:54.559 that felt like real, real, fucking real. And I understand 341 00:19:55.160 --> 00:19:59.319 that with the exception of Enrique, Ricky called me Ricky, 342 00:20:00.079 --> 00:20:04.319 don't like Enrique, and with the exception the exception of Enrique, 343 00:20:05.160 --> 00:20:08.200 this is a very whitewash show as well. But I 344 00:20:08.240 --> 00:20:14.759 could see myself in those characters regardless In terms of Lena, 345 00:20:14.880 --> 00:20:21.200 like her being an annoying, fat feminist. Sure, sure, that's 346 00:20:21.240 --> 00:20:29.359 what she's known for. I I usually find that when 347 00:20:29.759 --> 00:20:33.519 the entire internet hates a person, they're doing a lot. 348 00:20:33.799 --> 00:20:35.480 They're doing a lot, and that doesn't mean that the 349 00:20:35.480 --> 00:20:40.400 person didn't deserve some disdain. But like, sometimes it's just easy. 350 00:20:40.519 --> 00:20:43.240 It's just easy to hate this person. I think Anne 351 00:20:43.240 --> 00:20:45.200 Hathaway has gotten it. I think she coming back to 352 00:20:45.200 --> 00:20:48.880 get it again. I think famously I've defended j Loo 353 00:20:48.960 --> 00:20:53.240 to you, guys. Jlo's biggest crime is that she is rude, 354 00:20:53.440 --> 00:20:57.119 and she is corny, and she takes herself a tyler too. Seriously, 355 00:20:57.640 --> 00:21:02.839 that is Jlo's biggest fucking crime. Okay, the rude part, right, 356 00:21:03.400 --> 00:21:05.960 that's it. But I told you if I was a celebrity, 357 00:21:06.039 --> 00:21:08.200 y'all have so many subparate as dedicated to me being 358 00:21:08.240 --> 00:21:10.440 rude to people in public, I would that said, I 359 00:21:10.480 --> 00:21:12.279 don't want to be famous, and I wouldn't be trying 360 00:21:12.319 --> 00:21:15.279 to be famous, And that's the opposite of j Loo. Okay, 361 00:21:15.599 --> 00:21:17.799 that's what she needs. She got a love addiction and 362 00:21:17.880 --> 00:21:20.680 she fucking needs. She is desperate for the we could, 363 00:21:20.759 --> 00:21:22.559 we could, We could easily go back, and I'll tell 364 00:21:22.559 --> 00:21:25.640 you exactly where her love, her love and attention addiction 365 00:21:25.759 --> 00:21:28.880 came from. But that's her biggest crime. I'm not going 366 00:21:28.920 --> 00:21:31.559 to allow and saying the N word, and I'm not 367 00:21:31.559 --> 00:21:34.039 gonna allow you guys to be like she stole a 368 00:21:34.039 --> 00:21:38.400 Shanti's voice. If Ashanti had no agency in the fact 369 00:21:38.440 --> 00:21:42.880 that they were using her voice in the mix of 370 00:21:43.759 --> 00:21:48.200 Jlo's because Ashanti did a lot of demos, right, If 371 00:21:48.680 --> 00:21:53.039 Ashanti had no agency, no control over the fact that 372 00:21:53.079 --> 00:21:57.119 when they mixed Jlo's songs, they would leave Ashanti's voice 373 00:21:57.359 --> 00:21:59.519 right either in the background vocals or in the front 374 00:21:59.519 --> 00:22:03.559 front vocal. Okay, that is not the If Ashanti didn't 375 00:22:03.559 --> 00:22:08.160 have any agency, If Mariah Carey, which is who Tommy 376 00:22:08.160 --> 00:22:12.039 Motola was trying to hurt with JLO, like she JLO 377 00:22:12.559 --> 00:22:15.480 only exists because Tommy Otola was like, oh, Maria, you're 378 00:22:15.480 --> 00:22:19.160 gonna fucking leave me. Guess what, I'm gonna make another you? Okay, 379 00:22:19.400 --> 00:22:21.240 I made you and I'll make another you. And he 380 00:22:21.400 --> 00:22:26.079 was actively stealing her songs finding out when finding out 381 00:22:26.160 --> 00:22:31.319 when she was like trying to put something out and 382 00:22:31.359 --> 00:22:35.119 like stealing that structure, like that's what I'm real like 383 00:22:36.519 --> 00:22:42.240 Maria did some song and Tommy went to murder Ink 384 00:22:42.319 --> 00:22:46.839 what's the dude erv Gotti and told him I want 385 00:22:46.839 --> 00:22:51.039 a song just like that, and they snatched that song 386 00:22:51.079 --> 00:22:54.759 from somebody and gave it to Jlo. That's like, if 387 00:22:54.839 --> 00:22:58.880 Mariah Carey had no agency in it and fucking Ashanti 388 00:22:58.920 --> 00:23:01.920 had no agency, you think j Loo head agency in it. 389 00:23:02.279 --> 00:23:04.279 You think she was in charge of the fucking mix. 390 00:23:04.599 --> 00:23:06.519 You're like, oh, she could have told him? Was could she? 391 00:23:07.960 --> 00:23:13.400 Could she? That's what I'm talking about. Like, sure, she's 392 00:23:13.400 --> 00:23:16.599 the only one that really benefited from it, But bro, like, 393 00:23:19.119 --> 00:23:20.960 I think it's important that we talk about how that happened. 394 00:23:21.000 --> 00:23:23.839 How that happens all the fucking time. How you often 395 00:23:23.880 --> 00:23:28.240 can hear the original writer of the song on that 396 00:23:28.279 --> 00:23:30.759 demo of the song in the final mix of this. 397 00:23:30.880 --> 00:23:34.319 I know we should talk about that, We should talk 398 00:23:34.359 --> 00:23:39.119 about how Like, but that happens all the time, and 399 00:23:39.160 --> 00:23:41.720 people only care about it when it's Jennifer Lopez. And 400 00:23:41.759 --> 00:23:45.160 you know why, cause she's fucking rude. That's why she's rude. 401 00:23:45.319 --> 00:23:50.920 She's corny, she's cringey, that's why. Okay, And like, as 402 00:23:50.960 --> 00:23:52.799 I keep explaining to you guys, I am a hater, 403 00:23:53.400 --> 00:23:58.200 not a fucking liar. Okay, I hate, but I'm never 404 00:23:58.200 --> 00:24:01.039 gonna tell I'm not gonna like just be like, oh, 405 00:24:01.240 --> 00:24:04.640 this person is horrible, horrible, horrible, and everything they do 406 00:24:04.720 --> 00:24:06.480 is horrible, and I'm just gonna like start being like, 407 00:24:06.519 --> 00:24:08.279 look at that bitch over there eating crackers. I'm not 408 00:24:08.359 --> 00:24:12.960 doing that because when I tell you something's fucked up, 409 00:24:13.000 --> 00:24:18.880 you won't believe me because I'm telling I wouldn't you know. Yeah. Anyway, 410 00:24:19.359 --> 00:24:23.240 for Lena, do I think her hate is justified? Yeah, 411 00:24:23.599 --> 00:24:25.720 but I just think that she was just an easy 412 00:24:25.759 --> 00:24:29.440 punching bag too. So like the uproar of Lena Dunnab 413 00:24:30.680 --> 00:24:32.519 was a lot. I was like, Oh, this bitch is 414 00:24:32.599 --> 00:24:35.200 just everywhere fucking shit up, But I wasn't really following 415 00:24:35.200 --> 00:24:36.720 her for a lot of stuff. I do remember the 416 00:24:36.720 --> 00:24:40.359 Odell Beckham shit. I do remember the rape apologist shit. 417 00:24:40.480 --> 00:24:43.720 I do remember that. I do remember sometimes looking at 418 00:24:43.799 --> 00:24:47.720 her dressed not as Hannah, not as the character, but 419 00:24:47.799 --> 00:24:52.839 dresses herself and being like, oh, why would you do that? 420 00:24:52.839 --> 00:24:55.720 That wouldn't look good on anybody, And I'm again, it's 421 00:24:55.720 --> 00:24:59.279 not about her body. In fact, Lena Dunham is a 422 00:24:59.319 --> 00:25:01.519 lot bigger now she was a small fat Back then 423 00:25:01.640 --> 00:25:05.200 she was. The way people would call her fat is 424 00:25:05.240 --> 00:25:07.640 if she needed to get to doctor Nole's house, you know, 425 00:25:08.200 --> 00:25:11.160 like she needed to throw herself on doctor Nole's home 426 00:25:11.240 --> 00:25:13.799 doorsteps so he could help her. Don't even skip the office, 427 00:25:13.799 --> 00:25:17.240 go right to his house, babe. She wasn't like that. 428 00:25:17.279 --> 00:25:19.519 But one of the things that used to bother me 429 00:25:19.640 --> 00:25:22.039 is she used to wear such unflattering clothes. And I 430 00:25:22.119 --> 00:25:24.200 used to think to myself, you know, as a fat person, 431 00:25:24.240 --> 00:25:26.279 I know you can do better than that. Are you 432 00:25:26.359 --> 00:25:29.799 doing it on purpose or to I know on the 433 00:25:29.839 --> 00:25:31.960 show she was doing on purpose, and I'll talk more 434 00:25:31.960 --> 00:25:35.119 about that, But in real life, I was like, did 435 00:25:35.160 --> 00:25:37.000 you do this so that tomorrow people will be like, 436 00:25:37.039 --> 00:25:39.279 look how ugly she looks. She's a fat piece of shit. 437 00:25:39.599 --> 00:25:41.440 I did think that a few times, and when I 438 00:25:41.519 --> 00:25:44.000 said it out loud a few times, people would give 439 00:25:44.000 --> 00:25:46.880 me such shit about it. The same they reacted. The 440 00:25:46.920 --> 00:25:49.759 same way is when I told people the Areaana Grande 441 00:25:49.920 --> 00:25:53.440 was dressing like a sexy baby on purpose, like with 442 00:25:53.480 --> 00:25:58.839 the lollipop and the big and the big sweatshirt that 443 00:25:58.880 --> 00:26:00.839 would swallow her a whole and looked like she was 444 00:26:00.839 --> 00:26:04.160 wearing no pants but also high heeled, like a hot 445 00:26:04.599 --> 00:26:08.680 knee high thigh high boots, and she's looking on a 446 00:26:08.680 --> 00:26:11.400 fucking lollipop in her head, like, yeah, she was looking 447 00:26:11.480 --> 00:26:14.000 like that on purpose. There is no way in hell 448 00:26:14.680 --> 00:26:17.279 that that was an accident. And it maybe if one 449 00:26:17.279 --> 00:26:18.880 time it was an accident, there's no way in hell 450 00:26:19.119 --> 00:26:21.200 her agent, her managers or publicists will allow her to 451 00:26:21.240 --> 00:26:24.160 do that over and over again. That was what she 452 00:26:24.319 --> 00:26:26.480 was going for. And I know, and people would argue 453 00:26:26.519 --> 00:26:28.599 me down. They'd be like, she's a young girl. She's 454 00:26:28.640 --> 00:26:30.400 just trying to find what fits. She's trying to figure 455 00:26:30.400 --> 00:26:33.839 out her life. Maybe yeah, sure, I mean Ariana Grande 456 00:26:33.920 --> 00:26:37.720 the person, probably, but Ariana Grande, the product, the brand. 457 00:26:38.440 --> 00:26:41.839 She's doing sexy baby on purpose. Sorry, And it feels 458 00:26:41.960 --> 00:26:46.799 like Lena Dunham the brand was sometimes doing like look 459 00:26:46.839 --> 00:26:52.440 at my body, even in this misshapen outfit. I bet 460 00:26:52.480 --> 00:26:54.519 you hate it, don't you? Why don't you ride a 461 00:26:54.519 --> 00:26:59.240 tweet about it? That's what it felt sometimes, and so 462 00:26:59.359 --> 00:27:01.480 that's what I like thought of Lynda Dunham. I thought 463 00:27:01.519 --> 00:27:03.559 she did a great job in Girls. I thought Girls 464 00:27:03.640 --> 00:27:05.599 was good. I did not think it changed my life 465 00:27:06.079 --> 00:27:10.920 and I yeah, I you know, I thought that she 466 00:27:11.359 --> 00:27:15.039 always seemed to be in trouble. And because I take 467 00:27:15.119 --> 00:27:18.119 those types of things where everybody is mad with a 468 00:27:18.160 --> 00:27:21.319 bit of a grain of salt, like maybe it's a 469 00:27:21.400 --> 00:27:24.359 contrarian in me, but I really just I'm like, I 470 00:27:24.400 --> 00:27:27.279 don't know. I know for myself, I'm not as bad 471 00:27:27.279 --> 00:27:29.880 as my detractors, and I'm not as good as my 472 00:27:29.920 --> 00:27:31.839 supporters think I am. I'm not as bad as the 473 00:27:31.839 --> 00:27:33.920 people wait me I think I am, and I'm not 474 00:27:33.960 --> 00:27:35.559 as good as the people who love me think I am. 475 00:27:35.599 --> 00:27:37.720 I know that I am somewhere in the middle. I 476 00:27:37.759 --> 00:27:44.240 am a messy, fairal, little dirty human who has opposable 477 00:27:44.279 --> 00:27:46.279 thumbs and thinks I'm in charge of the world now 478 00:27:46.559 --> 00:27:48.599 like all the rest of us. I know that I 479 00:27:49.240 --> 00:27:53.319 have human feelings, and I make many mistakes, and sometimes 480 00:27:53.359 --> 00:27:56.119 I get my wins, but I know I'm not my mistakes, 481 00:27:56.119 --> 00:27:59.440 and I'm also not my wins either, just me, and 482 00:27:59.519 --> 00:28:02.680 so I think most people are like that too, and 483 00:28:02.720 --> 00:28:05.720 I'm willing to look for the humanity in them. The 484 00:28:05.839 --> 00:28:08.519 exceptions would be probably Jack's Taylor and people who don't 485 00:28:08.559 --> 00:28:14.559 wear shoes at the airport. That's it. So the first 486 00:28:14.599 --> 00:28:16.319 thing I want to say about this book. I enjoyed 487 00:28:16.319 --> 00:28:18.640 the book. The book reminded me of How to Murder 488 00:28:18.680 --> 00:28:21.799 Your Life by Cat Marnell, Like, and what I mean 489 00:28:21.839 --> 00:28:26.839 by that is, I'm not telling you that that Cat 490 00:28:26.880 --> 00:28:29.160 Marnell is a good person. I would never tell you 491 00:28:29.200 --> 00:28:32.880 that Cat Marnell is a lot of shit, but good person. 492 00:28:32.920 --> 00:28:34.759 I don't think they're gonna put that on her tombstone. 493 00:28:35.680 --> 00:28:37.720 So I think a lot of people are like, why 494 00:28:37.720 --> 00:28:39.480 would you read that book? Do you support her? No? 495 00:28:39.640 --> 00:28:41.960 I just I want to know the TA. I want 496 00:28:41.960 --> 00:28:48.720 to know the T And yeah, I think that How 497 00:28:48.759 --> 00:28:52.559 to Murder Your Life is really about Cat's multiple multiple mistakes, 498 00:28:52.559 --> 00:28:55.240 howvery at every turn she's supposed to go right and 499 00:28:55.279 --> 00:28:59.480 she goes left, and about you know, just the hardest 500 00:28:59.480 --> 00:29:01.880 part of her, like the most chaotic part of her life. 501 00:29:02.039 --> 00:29:05.200 And this is about That's Lina. Lena Dunham's book is 502 00:29:05.279 --> 00:29:07.960 like that as well. The book is written by an 503 00:29:07.960 --> 00:29:14.000 intellectualizer twin where have you Been? Gay Girl? Ganggang? Like 504 00:29:15.079 --> 00:29:18.920 an intellectualizer Lena Dunham, And I wrote this on threads. 505 00:29:19.079 --> 00:29:27.319 Lena Dunham is someone who is incredibly self aware about 506 00:29:27.359 --> 00:29:31.519 herself and nothing else. Her emotional intelligence does not extend 507 00:29:31.559 --> 00:29:36.960 to other people. She has no perspective. She doesn't know 508 00:29:37.000 --> 00:29:41.359 anybody's pertive perspective except for hers. You know when every 509 00:29:41.440 --> 00:29:43.400 year when they're like, you need to read diverse books. 510 00:29:44.319 --> 00:29:50.039 Not Lena. Lena, she just is really like stuck inside herself. 511 00:29:50.799 --> 00:29:53.960 And although I don't remember her addressing d Odell Buckham thing, 512 00:29:54.519 --> 00:29:57.079 but I will say, like, that's one of the things 513 00:29:57.079 --> 00:30:00.279 in which I know that about her is that she 514 00:30:00.839 --> 00:30:03.079 sat next to Odell Beckham, who never said a fucking 515 00:30:03.079 --> 00:30:07.000 word to her, and created a story and then about 516 00:30:07.000 --> 00:30:08.680 how he looked at her and didn't think she was 517 00:30:08.720 --> 00:30:12.759 a woman shaped object and was disgusted by her and 518 00:30:12.799 --> 00:30:15.079 described all these things and like put that out in 519 00:30:15.079 --> 00:30:19.079 the world. And she could not see that as a 520 00:30:19.119 --> 00:30:22.799 white woman sitting next to a black man, projecting all 521 00:30:22.839 --> 00:30:25.519 this shit who did nothing to you, projecting all this 522 00:30:25.599 --> 00:30:28.599 shit onto him about how he thinks you're ugly, he 523 00:30:28.720 --> 00:30:32.079 discounts you, he can't even look in your direction what 524 00:30:32.119 --> 00:30:36.160 the objects of that is. Because Lena does. Lena doesn't 525 00:30:36.200 --> 00:30:40.079 know about intersectionality, right, She doesn't know shit about that. 526 00:30:40.640 --> 00:30:46.839 Lena doesn't know shit about any marginalized group except women 527 00:30:47.519 --> 00:30:54.599 and feminists. That's it, that's really it, and everything all 528 00:30:54.640 --> 00:30:57.160 her whole entire lenses through that, which is fine. But 529 00:30:57.200 --> 00:31:00.759 when you look up white feminist in the dictionary, Lena 530 00:31:00.799 --> 00:31:04.720 Dunnoman sitting that her picture's right there, and there's nothing 531 00:31:05.759 --> 00:31:08.640 literally wrong with being a white feminist person. There's nothing 532 00:31:08.640 --> 00:31:15.319 wrong with that. But white feminist TM right all capital 533 00:31:15.400 --> 00:31:22.240 letters is a person that only their feminist feminism is 534 00:31:22.319 --> 00:31:27.279 rooted in the idea that instead of dismantling the systems 535 00:31:27.759 --> 00:31:30.319 that oppress women, they just want to be at the 536 00:31:30.319 --> 00:31:34.480 fucking table and be able to do the same thing 537 00:31:34.519 --> 00:31:37.079 that the people that are represent They they want a 538 00:31:37.119 --> 00:31:41.079 seat at the table. They want the power that men have, 539 00:31:41.200 --> 00:31:43.960 and they just want to use that power, usually on 540 00:31:44.039 --> 00:31:47.839 other marginalized groups. They are not trying to dismantle any systems, 541 00:31:47.880 --> 00:31:51.160 and there are there when we talk about liberation in 542 00:31:51.200 --> 00:31:53.559 the black community, there are plenty of people. They don't 543 00:31:53.559 --> 00:31:56.279 want liberation. They don't want the system to dismantle. They 544 00:31:56.319 --> 00:31:58.359 want to walk the world like a white person. And 545 00:31:58.359 --> 00:32:03.319 once they receive and once they that, they're like, good, 546 00:32:03.839 --> 00:32:06.960 I've I've done everything I came here to do. I 547 00:32:06.960 --> 00:32:08.319 don't know what the rest of you, in words, are 548 00:32:08.319 --> 00:32:12.480 gonna do. But yeah, and that's how lenam linam Ah, 549 00:32:13.039 --> 00:32:15.480 I'm saying her word, her name wrong. I'm so sorry. 550 00:32:15.720 --> 00:32:20.720 Lina's feminism feels to me. And the fact that like 551 00:32:20.880 --> 00:32:22.559 she sat there and did that. I was like, Oh, 552 00:32:22.599 --> 00:32:27.000 you've never heard of Immettel. You've never heard of the 553 00:32:27.119 --> 00:32:31.279 trope of a white woman. You've never I bet you've 554 00:32:31.319 --> 00:32:33.160 never seen Malcolm X right, you've never read that book 555 00:32:33.160 --> 00:32:35.359 and you've never seen it seen the movie. Right, This 556 00:32:35.559 --> 00:32:39.039 idea of black women who are white women who want 557 00:32:39.039 --> 00:32:44.119 to interact sexually with black men, and if things don't 558 00:32:44.160 --> 00:32:48.079 go the way they want them to go, they are 559 00:32:48.160 --> 00:32:51.880 willing to throw those men to the wolves. Oh, officer, 560 00:32:52.000 --> 00:32:54.640 I don't even know this man. He told me to 561 00:32:54.640 --> 00:32:56.960 get his cat. That's and I know some of you 562 00:32:57.039 --> 00:32:58.960 have been like, Princess, that's a far reach. It's not 563 00:32:59.000 --> 00:33:02.759 a reach, guys, it's not A man did nothing to her, 564 00:33:02.799 --> 00:33:10.400 and she sat there and created a narrative that that 565 00:33:10.440 --> 00:33:14.640 she projected from herself onto him, went public with the shit. 566 00:33:14.880 --> 00:33:16.279 And I don't know what you think. I don't know 567 00:33:16.279 --> 00:33:19.400 what you thought. The response was gonna be people being like, damn, 568 00:33:19.440 --> 00:33:22.440 O'Dell Beckham, you're so rude, you hate women or any 569 00:33:22.480 --> 00:33:25.880 of that shit. People were like, bitch, did he even 570 00:33:25.920 --> 00:33:29.079 say a word to you? Why is everything about you? 571 00:33:30.079 --> 00:33:33.079 And why are you trying to present this black man 572 00:33:33.119 --> 00:33:36.480 in a way like if she had situational awareness, which 573 00:33:36.480 --> 00:33:42.559 she does not, if she had that, she would have realized, 574 00:33:42.599 --> 00:33:45.240 you can't You're not gonna be able to do this. 575 00:33:45.240 --> 00:33:46.839 This is not gonna look the way you want to look, 576 00:33:46.839 --> 00:33:49.839 And a lot of things in this book, I was like, oh, 577 00:33:49.960 --> 00:33:51.839 you know, actually in this book A lot of times 578 00:33:52.359 --> 00:33:56.680 I felt the same way when I read Amanda Knox's memoir. Okay, 579 00:33:57.759 --> 00:34:01.119 reading Amanda Knox's memoir to put that shit down so 580 00:34:01.440 --> 00:34:06.119 fucking many times because I'd be like, oh my god, Amanda, 581 00:34:05.720 --> 00:34:10.480 what would you think the police believe you. They're just upset, 582 00:34:10.519 --> 00:34:13.960 they're just tired, and that's why they're being so snipulant. 583 00:34:13.960 --> 00:34:16.559 Don't even think you killed someone. Why would you not 584 00:34:16.679 --> 00:34:20.679 leave the fucking country and go to your aunt's house. 585 00:34:20.719 --> 00:34:22.239 It wasn't in Italy. It might have been in France, 586 00:34:22.280 --> 00:34:25.679 it was somewhere Germany. It was somewhere and go to 587 00:34:25.719 --> 00:34:28.000 your aunt's fucking house in the other. Why wouldn't you 588 00:34:28.079 --> 00:34:30.320 leave the country immediate, like your fucking parents told you 589 00:34:30.400 --> 00:34:36.239 to as soon as that shit happened, Amanda, Why would 590 00:34:36.360 --> 00:34:39.239 you be in a police station waiting to be interrogated 591 00:34:39.280 --> 00:34:42.000 again and a police officer I actually don't know who 592 00:34:42.000 --> 00:34:44.199 it was, but came over because she was doing yoga posts. 593 00:34:44.239 --> 00:34:49.440 She was trying to like like center herself, relaxed, you know, 594 00:34:49.480 --> 00:34:53.519 meditate cause you know you're in a police station being 595 00:34:53.519 --> 00:34:57.880 accused of shit. Why would you and someone said, oh, 596 00:34:57.880 --> 00:35:01.519 you're really flexible start doing gymn Why don't you do that? 597 00:35:03.039 --> 00:35:06.639 You don't think people can see you. Why would you, 598 00:35:07.360 --> 00:35:15.880 when being interrogated refuse an interpreter because you were embarrassed 599 00:35:15.880 --> 00:35:17.679 about your Italian You wanted to be like no, no, no, 600 00:35:17.840 --> 00:35:22.400 I can do it. Like what hm hm hmm. This 601 00:35:22.599 --> 00:35:24.679 is not a night at the bar of some hot 602 00:35:24.719 --> 00:35:26.559 guys and what you're trying to You're gonna try to 603 00:35:26.559 --> 00:35:28.480 stay in Italian the whole time, even though it's not 604 00:35:28.480 --> 00:35:30.760 your first language. I don't think she knew Italian until 605 00:35:30.800 --> 00:35:32.880 she got like any Italian till she got to Italy. 606 00:35:34.480 --> 00:35:37.239 I why would you this is not that this is 607 00:35:37.280 --> 00:35:40.679 the government. The government's got you, bitch, You need to 608 00:35:40.760 --> 00:35:44.639 understand exactly what everybody in this fucking room is saying. 609 00:35:44.960 --> 00:35:49.800 You need to understan you need to be understood exactly 610 00:35:50.239 --> 00:35:53.159 what you're saying because and the connotations of words are 611 00:35:53.159 --> 00:35:58.840 differently and and those I can't even breathe right now 612 00:35:59.079 --> 00:36:02.280 to put that book down so many times, like you 613 00:36:02.360 --> 00:36:04.679 don't hear the fucking saxophones, bitch, Like what are you 614 00:36:04.920 --> 00:36:09.599 doing for people who have like seen that trend on TikTok, 615 00:36:09.800 --> 00:36:13.599 Like the Saxophones got louder. This idea that something bad's 616 00:36:13.599 --> 00:36:16.519 about to happen that originates from Boys in the Hood, 617 00:36:17.159 --> 00:36:23.760 which is a foundational movie to a certain Black millennials, 618 00:36:24.280 --> 00:36:28.800 maybe even Black gen x's to a certain extent. And 619 00:36:28.840 --> 00:36:32.559 what happens is that they get into this gang of 620 00:36:32.760 --> 00:36:39.559 this gang member and they run off and they split 621 00:36:39.639 --> 00:36:44.199 up because they're running and Ricky who was gonna go be? 622 00:36:44.440 --> 00:36:46.760 Who was gonna go You know he was he was 623 00:36:46.760 --> 00:36:49.199 getting a scholarship to play football. He already had a 624 00:36:49.280 --> 00:36:52.119 kid and a girlfriend. He was pulling his family out 625 00:36:52.119 --> 00:36:57.360 of poverty, you know, Ricky was. He had he stopped 626 00:36:57.400 --> 00:36:59.199 by the store, I think he got milk, and he 627 00:36:59.400 --> 00:37:02.400 was doing scratch off lottery tickets. He loved to do that, 628 00:37:03.000 --> 00:37:05.280 and he was too busy doing that, and he didn't 629 00:37:05.320 --> 00:37:07.920 see the drive by coming, Like he didn't see that 630 00:37:07.599 --> 00:37:11.599 the gang members had caught up with him, right, And 631 00:37:12.360 --> 00:37:19.239 as he's walking, the saxophones are the soundtrack of the 632 00:37:19.239 --> 00:37:23.000 movie is getting louder. The saxophones are getting louder until 633 00:37:23.639 --> 00:37:28.480 he gets shot. I just just a little tidbit of information, 634 00:37:28.519 --> 00:37:30.079 because I know a lot of you do not know 635 00:37:30.159 --> 00:37:32.480 that movie, and a lot of you did not know 636 00:37:32.960 --> 00:37:38.519 the saxophones getting louder trend came from that anyway, a 637 00:37:38.599 --> 00:37:42.039 man of Knox, The saxophones kept getting louder and louder, 638 00:37:42.039 --> 00:37:46.320 and that bitch had on earplugs. She is so lucky. 639 00:37:46.639 --> 00:37:49.119 She's like the luckiest person in the fucking world. And 640 00:37:49.159 --> 00:37:50.559 I know you may not think that because she did 641 00:37:50.559 --> 00:37:54.199 some Italian prison time over crime that she didn't commit. 642 00:37:54.320 --> 00:37:56.559 I fully believe she didn't commit that crime. I also 643 00:37:56.639 --> 00:37:59.679 believe she's to be evaluated for autism. And I don't 644 00:37:59.760 --> 00:38:04.119 mean that in a like insult way. She has a 645 00:38:04.159 --> 00:38:08.599 hard time reading social situations, like a really hard obvious 646 00:38:08.679 --> 00:38:13.679 social situations, you know, like really like, I don't think. 647 00:38:14.079 --> 00:38:17.480 I just feel like, I just feel like she could 648 00:38:17.480 --> 00:38:20.159 do with some accommodations. Mmm, she could do with Like, 649 00:38:20.960 --> 00:38:23.400 so she should be accommodated in some ways because there's 650 00:38:23.480 --> 00:38:26.079 just some skills she can't she didn't learn naturally, and 651 00:38:26.119 --> 00:38:30.639 I don't know that she could learn at this age anyway. 652 00:38:30.960 --> 00:38:34.480 Lena gave me that impression. Lena is incredibly naive, so 653 00:38:34.719 --> 00:38:39.480 fucking naive. At some point she said that she didn't 654 00:38:39.519 --> 00:38:42.960 give she never gave off like born and raised New Yorker. 655 00:38:42.960 --> 00:38:46.079 I was like, yeah, she that like she seemed like 656 00:38:46.119 --> 00:38:49.119 a transplant from the Midwest. I was like, exactly, I don't. 657 00:38:49.880 --> 00:38:57.880 You are so surprised by so many things. But she's 658 00:38:57.920 --> 00:39:01.199 an intellectualizer. She is absolutely just like I am. She 659 00:39:01.280 --> 00:39:04.360 is absolutely someone who could turn something around in her 660 00:39:04.400 --> 00:39:07.800 head and pick it every part of it and dissect it. 661 00:39:08.199 --> 00:39:12.519 She knows herself so fucking well. She knows exactly why 662 00:39:12.559 --> 00:39:17.239 she's doing things. She can she can explain where the 663 00:39:17.239 --> 00:39:19.400 feelings are coming from and what they're I bet she 664 00:39:19.440 --> 00:39:22.119 wins therapy every single time. She probably goes with therapy 665 00:39:22.159 --> 00:39:25.239 twice a week, and I bet she wins therapy because 666 00:39:25.239 --> 00:39:27.400 she can go in there and do all the things. 667 00:39:27.800 --> 00:39:31.039 She could probably get the therapist therapy. You know. But 668 00:39:33.280 --> 00:39:35.960 I wrote in threads that I'm realizing but that's not true. 669 00:39:36.000 --> 00:39:38.480 I've known this for a long long time. I'm just 670 00:39:38.519 --> 00:39:42.800 now accepting it that being incredibly self aware is not 671 00:39:42.960 --> 00:39:47.239 the same as handling your shit, like being able to 672 00:39:47.360 --> 00:39:51.039 name why you do things is not the same as 673 00:39:51.119 --> 00:39:57.719 working to be better. And there this book reminded me 674 00:39:57.760 --> 00:40:01.400 a bit of lamar Odam's book, I mean lamar Odem's documentary, 675 00:40:01.880 --> 00:40:07.360 and that the character arc is missing. And these aren't 676 00:40:07.400 --> 00:40:10.000 characters that are real people, obviously, But in any story, 677 00:40:10.039 --> 00:40:12.320 which is what a book is giving you, what a 678 00:40:12.400 --> 00:40:15.239 documentary is trying to trying to narrate a story to you, 679 00:40:17.760 --> 00:40:21.119 the characters in the story cannot be the same at 680 00:40:21.159 --> 00:40:23.320 the beginning as they are at the end. Lena is 681 00:40:23.360 --> 00:40:25.519 the same at the beginning and the end of her book. 682 00:40:25.760 --> 00:40:31.840 The difference is the people around her are different. She's 683 00:40:31.880 --> 00:40:36.280 she's interacting with men who aren't sadists and want to 684 00:40:36.360 --> 00:40:39.519 her and wanna and get off on seeing her in pain, 685 00:40:39.599 --> 00:40:44.639 who aren't drug addicts and all these other things. She's 686 00:40:44.679 --> 00:40:46.360 interacting with men that aren't and she talks about her 687 00:40:46.400 --> 00:40:49.199 husband very briefly, but she just describes them as different. 688 00:40:49.800 --> 00:40:54.239 She doesn't describe herself as different, you know what I mean, 689 00:40:54.360 --> 00:41:02.400 like like how are you different? But yeah, this is 690 00:41:02.480 --> 00:41:05.079 this is She's just very self aware. She's just not 691 00:41:05.280 --> 00:41:12.199 other aware. That's okay. So the first thing I want 692 00:41:12.239 --> 00:41:14.599 to talk about, I'm not obviously not going in order, 693 00:41:14.880 --> 00:41:16.239 but the first thing I want to talk about is 694 00:41:16.239 --> 00:41:22.440 the sibling stuff. Lena Dunham had uh as a trans brother, 695 00:41:22.480 --> 00:41:25.280 as a trans brother, a trans man as a brother. Okay, 696 00:41:26.000 --> 00:41:30.519 his name is Cyrus. Many times throughout the book she 697 00:41:30.679 --> 00:41:33.800 is talking about Cyrus, but Cyrus is not transitioned, okay. 698 00:41:36.119 --> 00:41:40.000 And it seemed like it seems like her relationship with 699 00:41:40.039 --> 00:41:45.440 Cyrus is very close the her. Her being famous really 700 00:41:46.760 --> 00:41:49.760 fucked with Cyrus a lot of anytime Lena was going 701 00:41:49.840 --> 00:41:52.679 viral for stuff at the time Cyrus was coming out 702 00:41:52.719 --> 00:41:58.199 as trans, and it really overshadowed that. It seems like 703 00:41:58.199 --> 00:42:02.480 like I didn't know Lena Dunham had all addiction. I 704 00:42:02.480 --> 00:42:04.280 didn't know she went to rehab. I didn't know any 705 00:42:04.320 --> 00:42:05.679 of that shit. I don't know if that was public. 706 00:42:05.719 --> 00:42:09.000 I just didn't know any shit. It seems like when 707 00:42:09.039 --> 00:42:12.599 Lena was going to rehab for a pill addiction, like 708 00:42:12.760 --> 00:42:15.079 Cyrus was the only one. I was like, yeah, like 709 00:42:15.360 --> 00:42:19.199 that has been affecting your life for the last however 710 00:42:19.239 --> 00:42:23.400 many years. Everyone else was like hmm okay, but Cyrus 711 00:42:23.480 --> 00:42:28.840 was like, yeah, that makes sense. I will say that 712 00:42:28.920 --> 00:42:33.519 Cyrus was flaky and Cyrus did turn down, like did 713 00:42:33.559 --> 00:42:37.239 fuck over a lot of things that Lena tried to 714 00:42:37.280 --> 00:42:39.840 do for them. By the way, you, Cyrus is in Girls. 715 00:42:39.840 --> 00:42:45.079 I think it's the last season. Hasn't he hasn't transitioned yet, 716 00:42:45.119 --> 00:42:53.079 but he's giving butch lesbian in it. But uh, completely different. Now, 717 00:42:55.679 --> 00:42:57.800 one thing I want to talk about in this cipling relationship. 718 00:42:58.719 --> 00:43:04.639 Cyrus is like five years younger than Lena. Okay, so 719 00:43:04.679 --> 00:43:07.679 remember that first book she wrote and I don't remember 720 00:43:07.719 --> 00:43:11.159 the words at all, but remember when it feels like 721 00:43:11.239 --> 00:43:13.880 in Aside, it wasn't the story that she was telling 722 00:43:14.119 --> 00:43:19.679 about how she talks about putting some rocks in Cyrus's 723 00:43:19.760 --> 00:43:22.239 Then vagina, I don't actually know. I know Cyrus had 724 00:43:22.280 --> 00:43:24.719 top surgery, I don't know anything else about Cyrus. So 725 00:43:24.800 --> 00:43:28.599 I'm saying then vagina because it's possible that vagina isn't 726 00:43:28.599 --> 00:43:32.960 here anymore. Lena talks about that in the book, and 727 00:43:33.039 --> 00:43:36.960 again it wasn't the main story that I remember that part, 728 00:43:37.360 --> 00:43:40.639 Like Cyrus was a baby, so I'm thinking Lena was six, 729 00:43:40.760 --> 00:43:43.360 maybe because Cyrus was born when they were five, maybe 730 00:43:43.639 --> 00:43:47.800 she was five or six. I want to start here. 731 00:43:48.119 --> 00:43:52.079 Whenever you talk about Lena Dunnan, Lena Dunham, people are like, 732 00:43:54.519 --> 00:43:58.599 she's a sexual assault and that's what they're talking about. 733 00:43:59.519 --> 00:44:04.039 She said, Lena thinks this happened. Lena thinks Lena thinks 734 00:44:04.239 --> 00:44:09.360 a right wing like propaganda website got ahold of the 735 00:44:09.360 --> 00:44:11.840 book pulled out the quotes that they wanted to. They 736 00:44:11.920 --> 00:44:15.320 wanted her like that they were first, they thought were 737 00:44:15.320 --> 00:44:24.000 the most damning, and like that's how this all got started. Maybe, 738 00:44:24.280 --> 00:44:27.920 but I don't think that if that white wing like 739 00:44:28.159 --> 00:44:33.639 website wasn't there, I don't think that nobody would care 740 00:44:33.719 --> 00:44:36.280 about this. So I'll tell you my opinion on this 741 00:44:36.320 --> 00:44:38.039 cause I hate a fence center because for a while 742 00:44:38.079 --> 00:44:40.320 I was like, I don't fucking know, but I and 743 00:44:40.400 --> 00:44:42.599 I hate a person that just will not form an opinion. 744 00:44:42.599 --> 00:44:44.639 I'm gonna tell you what my opinion is. I wouldn't 745 00:44:44.679 --> 00:44:47.960 call this sexual assault Lena l I believe Lena was 746 00:44:48.039 --> 00:44:50.760 no older than seven. Now, if you know that Lena 747 00:44:50.920 --> 00:44:53.159 was like fourteen or some shit, tell me, cause that 748 00:44:53.360 --> 00:44:55.440 I'm giving this based on my impressions of what happened. 749 00:44:55.480 --> 00:44:57.960 I have not heard Lena talk about this. I read 750 00:44:58.000 --> 00:45:00.920 in the book many years ago. She doesn't describe it 751 00:45:01.039 --> 00:45:05.400 again in this book. I believe Lena was five or 752 00:45:05.440 --> 00:45:08.480 six years old. I mean, was five or six years old, 753 00:45:08.639 --> 00:45:12.159 probably no older than seven. I'm gonna tell you that. 754 00:45:13.480 --> 00:45:14.840 You guys know, I used to be a foster parent. 755 00:45:14.840 --> 00:45:17.639 I used to work with this place, children children going 756 00:45:17.679 --> 00:45:24.639 through those traumatic incidents, and therefore lots of things happened. 757 00:45:25.039 --> 00:45:26.960 If I were in that experience and that was one 758 00:45:26.960 --> 00:45:30.039 of my foster kids, I would describe that as an 759 00:45:31.639 --> 00:45:36.920 I would describe that as an inappropriate touch. That's why 760 00:45:36.920 --> 00:45:39.400 I would describe a seven year old doing something like that, right, 761 00:45:40.440 --> 00:45:42.320 I would not describe it as a sexual assault. And 762 00:45:42.320 --> 00:45:44.480 you guys know, I get kind of crazy about the 763 00:45:45.039 --> 00:45:50.079 term sexual assault. It's almost useless because it covers everything, right, 764 00:45:50.519 --> 00:45:53.079 And when you hear sexual assault, if I had known 765 00:45:53.119 --> 00:45:55.519 this story, if I heard sexual assault, I would think 766 00:45:55.599 --> 00:45:58.920 Lena Dunham raped someone. I would think Lena Dunham did 767 00:45:58.960 --> 00:46:03.519 a debbie from shameless like roofied somebody and then forced 768 00:46:03.800 --> 00:46:06.000 like had sex with them. I would think, And Lena 769 00:46:06.519 --> 00:46:10.599 Dunham had run up to someone and like, I don't know, 770 00:46:11.920 --> 00:46:15.000 mashed her vagina in their face. I would think that 771 00:46:15.119 --> 00:46:22.159 Lena had penetrated someone with something. That's what I would 772 00:46:22.159 --> 00:46:23.760 be thinking if you said so, that's the first thing 773 00:46:23.800 --> 00:46:25.039 that come to my mind. So the first thing that 774 00:46:25.039 --> 00:46:27.920 comes to most people mind. Although sexual assault could mean 775 00:46:28.559 --> 00:46:32.880 you unwantedly touched them in a sexual way, it could 776 00:46:32.920 --> 00:46:38.800 also mean that technically, it could mean like you taking 777 00:46:38.880 --> 00:46:43.599 pictures of someone in a sexual situation without their consent 778 00:46:43.760 --> 00:46:46.079 or without their knowledge and distribute them. That is also 779 00:46:46.119 --> 00:46:52.679 a sexual assault. And so like, while I think technically 780 00:46:52.800 --> 00:46:55.400 you could call this a sexual assault, I think you 781 00:46:55.480 --> 00:46:57.920 need to take into account her age at the time 782 00:46:59.000 --> 00:47:07.960 and whether whether this fits the connotation of sexual assault. 783 00:47:08.960 --> 00:47:11.360 I don't think it is. Her age is what changes 784 00:47:11.400 --> 00:47:15.360 it for me. That said, so, let's say this is 785 00:47:15.639 --> 00:47:22.679 this is Lina molesting or assaulting someone at a at 786 00:47:22.719 --> 00:47:27.679 a elementary school age. That's not on her, that's on 787 00:47:27.719 --> 00:47:31.280 the parents. That her parents take more responsibility than that 788 00:47:31.360 --> 00:47:36.039 than Lena could. And third, I want to know why 789 00:47:36.079 --> 00:47:38.360 I was in this was in the book either way? 790 00:47:38.760 --> 00:47:41.880 Why would this be in the fucking book? Now? Liz 791 00:47:42.519 --> 00:47:45.480 rightfully pointed out that she wrote that she didn't get 792 00:47:45.519 --> 00:47:47.400 permission to write this book. She didn't have a contract 793 00:47:47.400 --> 00:47:49.440 to write this book. She was just writing because that's 794 00:47:49.440 --> 00:47:52.559 how she processes talking and writing also something that we 795 00:47:52.599 --> 00:47:56.480 have in common. She's just writing stories. And then it 796 00:47:56.719 --> 00:47:58.480 kind of developed into a book, and then she started 797 00:47:58.519 --> 00:48:01.119 trying to shop it around and she had like fifteen 798 00:48:01.679 --> 00:48:04.559 editors publishers that wanted that book. There was a bidding war, 799 00:48:05.320 --> 00:48:09.519 and I guarantee you that people were very easy on 800 00:48:09.559 --> 00:48:11.840 the edits on that book because they didn't want to 801 00:48:11.840 --> 00:48:13.639 make her un happy because she could always go somewhere else, 802 00:48:13.639 --> 00:48:19.480 couldn't she. So that is that's what I think happened, 803 00:48:19.719 --> 00:48:23.239 because books have to go through many mini rounds of 804 00:48:23.719 --> 00:48:27.880 review and it's just like, who thought that was a 805 00:48:27.880 --> 00:48:30.360 good story? Now? Lena said, well, the other thing I 806 00:48:30.400 --> 00:48:32.719 want to ask you guys, how are y'all getting access 807 00:48:32.760 --> 00:48:36.840 to your siblings genital so easily? How is that a thing? 808 00:48:38.199 --> 00:48:40.239 I grew up with a mother who was really strict 809 00:48:40.239 --> 00:48:41.960 about those sorts of things. I wouldn't say she was 810 00:48:42.000 --> 00:48:43.840 stricter than the other families I knew, but she was 811 00:48:43.880 --> 00:48:49.519 serious about stuff like that. And I just don't understand. 812 00:48:51.320 --> 00:48:53.199 You know, I didn't grow up in a naked house, right, 813 00:48:53.639 --> 00:48:55.079 That's not a thing that I grew up in. I 814 00:48:56.320 --> 00:48:58.480 don't know why y'all are naked all the time. I 815 00:48:58.480 --> 00:49:02.840 don't know why it's it's important for your children to 816 00:49:03.000 --> 00:49:06.280 see your naked body parts all the time. I'm not 817 00:49:06.320 --> 00:49:10.440 talking about two year olds that. I'm not talking about breastfeeding. 818 00:49:10.719 --> 00:49:14.480 I'm not talking about that, But I'm just talking about 819 00:49:14.519 --> 00:49:16.440 the fact that you don't have any clothes on, or 820 00:49:16.480 --> 00:49:18.719 you have very little clothes on, and so do your children, 821 00:49:19.000 --> 00:49:23.880 and you're just living life. I just feel like private 822 00:49:23.920 --> 00:49:27.079 parts are private for a reason, Like that sanctity of 823 00:49:27.519 --> 00:49:30.639 my body belongs to me is something I teach in 824 00:49:30.719 --> 00:49:33.719 all the children that I guide, like any children that's 825 00:49:33.760 --> 00:49:37.039 under my care. It's one of the main tenets of 826 00:49:37.199 --> 00:49:39.840 your rights in this home and in this world is 827 00:49:39.880 --> 00:49:43.239 that your body belongs to you. Your privates are private 828 00:49:43.280 --> 00:49:47.320 to you. They are not for other people's use or viewage, 829 00:49:47.360 --> 00:49:50.159 or any of those things. That's for you. You can 830 00:49:50.280 --> 00:49:52.320 if you need you with the doctor or if you 831 00:49:52.360 --> 00:49:55.199 need mom to help with something, I absolutely will do that. 832 00:49:55.639 --> 00:49:59.000 But this is not for everybody else in the world 833 00:49:59.079 --> 00:50:02.639 to consume. There for you. And so I don't understand 834 00:50:02.679 --> 00:50:05.960 how you even get access to your sister's vagina. I 835 00:50:06.039 --> 00:50:09.440 just don't get it. And I'm not saying I've never 836 00:50:09.480 --> 00:50:11.920 taken a bath with my brother's like just a year 837 00:50:11.960 --> 00:50:14.239 and three months younger than me. I have. I was 838 00:50:14.280 --> 00:50:17.519 a toddler at the time. We didn't after that that 839 00:50:17.559 --> 00:50:21.119 we didn't do that, and I have I did try 840 00:50:21.119 --> 00:50:22.800 to convince them he could poop out of this penis. 841 00:50:22.800 --> 00:50:25.719 I did. I was like, you already have a hole, 842 00:50:25.960 --> 00:50:27.760 and this will be more efficient if youpede and poop 843 00:50:27.800 --> 00:50:29.559 out of this hole. So it's not like I'm like, 844 00:50:30.239 --> 00:50:33.000 how did Lina, Like I think I understand how Lena 845 00:50:33.039 --> 00:50:38.320 got access to Cyrus's vagina. I think Cyrus was a baby, 846 00:50:38.679 --> 00:50:41.800 and Lena talks about how she always wanted like she 847 00:50:41.880 --> 00:50:45.000 would hug and kiss and like and like give the 848 00:50:45.039 --> 00:50:46.760 bottle and be like, can we just say this is 849 00:50:46.800 --> 00:50:49.239 my baby? Like Lena was very I think Lena was 850 00:50:49.239 --> 00:50:52.880 doing diaper changes and stuff like Lena was. But we're outside, 851 00:50:54.039 --> 00:50:57.360 I'm assuming this baby is clothed. I don't even think 852 00:50:57.400 --> 00:51:00.920 babies should be a genital should be for anybody to 853 00:51:01.280 --> 00:51:06.079 see and view and be in contact with. We babysit 854 00:51:06.280 --> 00:51:09.599 like two different guys. My husband is a godfather of 855 00:51:09.639 --> 00:51:12.519 the three children, and I think he's a deadbeat godfather, 856 00:51:12.559 --> 00:51:14.079 to be honest, because sometimes I have to remind him. 857 00:51:14.079 --> 00:51:16.159 We'll be like who. I like, yeah, you don't know 858 00:51:16.199 --> 00:51:19.719 that your godson. But we babysit them, and like one's 859 00:51:19.719 --> 00:51:25.480 an infant and one's like you just turned two. Still 860 00:51:25.480 --> 00:51:28.920 in diavers though, and so well it's not in diapers anymore. 861 00:51:28.960 --> 00:51:32.519 Just a night when they're over and it's time to 862 00:51:32.639 --> 00:51:36.079 change the baby. I don't let a seven year old 863 00:51:36.159 --> 00:51:38.559 change a baby. I don't even let the fifteen year 864 00:51:38.559 --> 00:51:43.039 old change your baby unless it's apps fucklutely necessary. I 865 00:51:43.079 --> 00:51:45.760 am like, no, I'm an adult, a safe adult, and 866 00:51:45.800 --> 00:51:47.599 I will take care of this. And no, you don't 867 00:51:47.599 --> 00:51:49.440 need to hover around me while we're doing this. I 868 00:51:49.519 --> 00:51:57.119 just feel like anyway, I just like, where did these 869 00:51:57.199 --> 00:52:07.000 rocks come from? And how were I can't imagine a 870 00:52:07.039 --> 00:52:12.079 situation in which I would be like, Okay, that makes 871 00:52:12.079 --> 00:52:16.880 sense if that happened. And also if it happened, I 872 00:52:17.119 --> 00:52:20.800 think I would be trying to counsel the importance of 873 00:52:21.360 --> 00:52:25.599 this was a mistake that you made. I don't ever 874 00:52:25.639 --> 00:52:28.039 want to see this again because I try to explain 875 00:52:28.079 --> 00:52:32.440 about body autonomy and specifically that you don't have a 876 00:52:32.519 --> 00:52:38.559 right to touch, interact, or even look at baby's vagina. Okay, 877 00:52:38.639 --> 00:52:43.159 that's not for you, and yours is also a private thing, 878 00:52:43.280 --> 00:52:48.480 like nobody has a right to do those things. And secondly, 879 00:52:48.559 --> 00:52:52.360 I would be like, and because other people wouldn't understand 880 00:52:52.960 --> 00:52:56.000 this is something we keep at home. I would hate 881 00:52:56.039 --> 00:52:58.880 for other people to hear this story and get the 882 00:52:58.920 --> 00:53:04.199 wrong idea about you, because people can make assumptions. And 883 00:53:04.239 --> 00:53:08.159 so I think this is a home conversation, not at 884 00:53:08.159 --> 00:53:13.079 anywhere else conversation, I think. But Lena says that they 885 00:53:13.079 --> 00:53:16.199 had been talking about this. This was a perfect family story, 886 00:53:16.599 --> 00:53:18.639 she did. They bring it up all the time, and 887 00:53:18.679 --> 00:53:21.119 she's like, if people think this story is bad, what 888 00:53:21.239 --> 00:53:22.960 if they find out that when I was four, I 889 00:53:23.039 --> 00:53:24.639 went to I was at a park and I told 890 00:53:24.639 --> 00:53:27.480 a group of near strangers that when I'm bad at home, 891 00:53:27.559 --> 00:53:31.159 someone puts a fork in my vagina, and I'm like, hey, Lena, 892 00:53:31.159 --> 00:53:35.000 you don't understand how those two stories are different. Four 893 00:53:35.079 --> 00:53:36.960 year olds say shit like that all the fucking time. 894 00:53:38.119 --> 00:53:41.400 They'll be like, they're like, what did you have for lunch? Poop? 895 00:53:43.320 --> 00:53:46.000 My daddy's shit, Oh shit, my daddy took a poop 896 00:53:46.039 --> 00:53:48.639 on a plate. And I ate they say crazy shit 897 00:53:48.920 --> 00:53:54.119 all the time, and they love peepee, pooh pooh private 898 00:53:54.159 --> 00:53:56.920 part humor. Todlers loved shit like that. Well, I guess 899 00:53:56.920 --> 00:53:58.880 she techned four, she was on taller, she was a preschooler. 900 00:53:59.039 --> 00:54:02.800 But yeah, they love like that at that age. That 901 00:54:02.960 --> 00:54:08.639 is absolutely something that a four year old would say normally. No, 902 00:54:09.320 --> 00:54:12.159 I'm sure a million people have stories of being four 903 00:54:12.239 --> 00:54:16.519 years old and telling people something crazy about their private 904 00:54:16.559 --> 00:54:22.519 parts or someone else's private parts, saying, you know, saying 905 00:54:22.559 --> 00:54:24.800 daddy can shoot fire out of his private parts. When 906 00:54:24.840 --> 00:54:28.440 daddy takes a poop, he I don't know, he eats 907 00:54:28.440 --> 00:54:30.639 a sandwich and stays in there all night and then 908 00:54:30.639 --> 00:54:32.760 the poop overflows and then we can't go to the 909 00:54:32.800 --> 00:54:34.159 bath No one's been able to go to the bathroom 910 00:54:34.159 --> 00:54:40.159 for three days. That nonsensical story that, yeah, a lot 911 00:54:40.199 --> 00:54:43.400 of people could tell you a story like that, very 912 00:54:43.760 --> 00:54:47.400 very few could tell you a story of placing rocks 913 00:54:47.480 --> 00:54:53.199 in their siblings Vagina. Okay, And not only could very 914 00:54:53.199 --> 00:54:56.039 few people tell you that, most of them wouldn't tell 915 00:54:56.079 --> 00:54:59.599 you that. That's the thing, Lena, most of them wouldn't 916 00:54:59.599 --> 00:55:06.440 tell you that you are aggressively toxically transparent. Like some 917 00:55:06.519 --> 00:55:09.760 of this shit is not meant to be repeated. And 918 00:55:09.800 --> 00:55:11.880 she said that she grew up in She said she understood, 919 00:55:11.920 --> 00:55:14.559 she grew up in a world where story where ideas 920 00:55:14.920 --> 00:55:19.960 couldn't be bad, only actions. So this story couldn't have 921 00:55:20.119 --> 00:55:22.760 been like, a story couldn't be bad. And to that, 922 00:55:22.840 --> 00:55:24.920 I want to say to you, Lena, a story is 923 00:55:24.960 --> 00:55:29.440 not an idea. A story is a recollection of events actions. 924 00:55:29.960 --> 00:55:35.440 So when you tell a recollection of actions that people 925 00:55:35.519 --> 00:55:38.559 could moralize into being bad, I want to be clear. 926 00:55:38.840 --> 00:55:41.320 I don't think this is good. I just don't think 927 00:55:42.000 --> 00:55:49.719 I would I would categorize as a sexual assault. I 928 00:55:49.920 --> 00:55:52.360 might call it a molestation. And if you want to 929 00:55:52.360 --> 00:55:54.639 call it sexual assault, I don't blame you, but I'm 930 00:55:54.679 --> 00:55:57.079 just saying that, like, this needs to be a lot more. 931 00:55:57.239 --> 00:55:59.480 There's a lot more nuanced. It's not she was not 932 00:55:59.559 --> 00:56:02.920 sixteen years old doing this. She was not twenty three, 933 00:56:03.000 --> 00:56:06.239 She wasn't even ten doing this. My understanding, I think 934 00:56:06.280 --> 00:56:09.639 she was no older than seven and seven year olds. Like, 935 00:56:09.679 --> 00:56:11.119 I don't know what y'all. I don't know if y'all 936 00:56:11.119 --> 00:56:14.199 been around some seven year olds, Like seven year olds 937 00:56:14.280 --> 00:56:16.039 do crazy shit all the time. I just don't know 938 00:56:16.079 --> 00:56:20.599 how she had access to it. Like, that's so crazy 939 00:56:20.599 --> 00:56:24.000 that she did that. This so fucking crazy. I want 940 00:56:24.039 --> 00:56:25.719 to talk a bit about her parents stuff. Let's let's 941 00:56:25.760 --> 00:56:28.639 talk about that Lena's parents. She has an issue with 942 00:56:28.719 --> 00:56:32.719 being called a nepo baby. Her parents aren't rich, but 943 00:56:32.760 --> 00:56:37.760 they are known in the art scene. Lena did grow 944 00:56:37.920 --> 00:56:41.880 up in an apartment in New York City, apartment they owned. 945 00:56:42.679 --> 00:56:45.280 When Lina was hitting hot rock bottom, she could go 946 00:56:45.400 --> 00:56:49.159 stay in her parents loft and tried becca. But they 947 00:56:49.199 --> 00:56:52.639 didn't necessarily have the money to fund her life and 948 00:56:52.800 --> 00:56:55.960 will her parents, I would not call them rich. Okay, 949 00:56:56.519 --> 00:57:02.800 they did fund Lena's tiny furniture, which I've never seen. 950 00:57:04.280 --> 00:57:06.719 Uh tiny furniture movie. That's kicked all this off, and 951 00:57:06.760 --> 00:57:09.559 we'll talk more about that. Uh, they they weren't able 952 00:57:09.639 --> 00:57:11.400 to like just give her ten thousand dollars to do it, 953 00:57:11.719 --> 00:57:14.880 but they call upon their friends and do so to 954 00:57:14.920 --> 00:57:20.239 get it. They just they just had connections, and connections 955 00:57:20.280 --> 00:57:24.360 can be as valuable as money. They got her first agent, 956 00:57:25.559 --> 00:57:27.880 like I said, they funded that, They got the funding 957 00:57:27.920 --> 00:57:33.360 for that that movie Lena. So when they pulled all 958 00:57:33.400 --> 00:57:35.719 the quotes from this to to entice us to buy 959 00:57:35.760 --> 00:57:37.559 this book, that it was a lot of quotes about 960 00:57:37.599 --> 00:57:40.320 Jack Antonov, who I don't even fuck about. I don't care. 961 00:57:42.000 --> 00:57:44.840 I know that y'all care because he is very connected 962 00:57:44.840 --> 00:57:48.119 to Taylor Swift, and I know that there are a 963 00:57:48.159 --> 00:57:49.719 lot of theories that they don't fuck with each other 964 00:57:49.800 --> 00:57:53.239 right now, which is and that like he is the 965 00:57:53.239 --> 00:57:57.159 the producer behind most of her albums, her latter ones, 966 00:57:57.639 --> 00:58:01.920 and that like they are work, and that's you know, 967 00:58:03.320 --> 00:58:04.679 I know, that's why a lot of people care. I 968 00:58:04.679 --> 00:58:08.079 don't care about that. I wish that more people knew that. 969 00:58:08.159 --> 00:58:13.159 This book is a story of an incredibly immeshed family 970 00:58:13.559 --> 00:58:18.280 and a friendship breakup and addiction and sickness, and her 971 00:58:18.280 --> 00:58:20.119 family is super I messed. She describes her mother as 972 00:58:20.159 --> 00:58:23.480 a top her mother, I would not call her mother nice. 973 00:58:23.599 --> 00:58:25.239 She reminds me a lot of my mother, and that 974 00:58:25.440 --> 00:58:28.920 like my mother is not we don't a nice person, 975 00:58:29.000 --> 00:58:32.400 isn't what we would call my mother. Yesterday I got 976 00:58:32.400 --> 00:58:34.960 I was a menacing walmart. I got into it. There 977 00:58:35.000 --> 00:58:36.639 was a woman in not a wheelchair, but she was 978 00:58:36.679 --> 00:58:39.000 like one of those. She was sitting in one of 979 00:58:39.000 --> 00:58:41.280 those walkers, a walker that if you turned around you 980 00:58:41.320 --> 00:58:43.280 could sit on it. She didn't one of those. I'm 981 00:58:43.280 --> 00:58:44.920 trying to go to self checkout, she says. I can't 982 00:58:44.920 --> 00:58:46.360 go to check out self check out because I have 983 00:58:46.400 --> 00:58:51.719 more than fifteen items. If I was in my right mind, 984 00:58:51.760 --> 00:58:54.960 I would have ignored her right the the lines to 985 00:58:55.039 --> 00:58:58.639 check out at the with a person or super long, 986 00:58:58.639 --> 00:59:01.760 and also I don't want to talk to anybody. If 987 00:59:01.800 --> 00:59:03.599 I was in my red mind, would ignore her because 988 00:59:03.599 --> 00:59:06.559 that's what Yvonne taught me to do. Right. Yvonne taught 989 00:59:06.599 --> 00:59:10.400 me that if you don't want to the rules don't 990 00:59:10.400 --> 00:59:12.679 apply to you. That's and they used to stress me 991 00:59:12.679 --> 00:59:14.440 out as a kid all the time. She my mother 992 00:59:14.880 --> 00:59:19.719 skips lines. My mother, Uh, just decide she doesn't have 993 00:59:19.719 --> 00:59:21.960 to do something. And she would always say if the 994 00:59:22.039 --> 00:59:24.719 rules don't apply to you, if the rules don't include you, 995 00:59:24.760 --> 00:59:27.039 then they don't apply to you. So if she could 996 00:59:27.079 --> 00:59:29.199 come up with a reason why that rule didn't up, 997 00:59:29.599 --> 00:59:33.800 like wasn't a c wasn't meshing with her situation, she'd 998 00:59:33.840 --> 00:59:35.679 be like, that doesn't apply to me. They don't mean me. 999 00:59:36.559 --> 00:59:38.119 And like I said, they used to. It used to 1000 00:59:38.159 --> 00:59:39.599 freak me the fuck out as a kid. I'd be like, 1001 00:59:39.639 --> 00:59:42.559 we're late. She's like, oh, we'll just walk in. Mom, 1002 00:59:43.159 --> 00:59:44.679 the line is long. Okay, Well let me go over 1003 00:59:44.679 --> 00:59:46.440 friend and tell him I gotta go to work. They'll 1004 00:59:46.519 --> 00:59:49.639 let me, And they often did. And my mother, I've 1005 00:59:49.679 --> 00:59:51.280 told the story a million times. We were actually talking 1006 00:59:51.280 --> 00:59:54.920 about yesterday. She she remembered it. This time, we were 1007 00:59:54.920 --> 00:59:57.760 sitting at five Points about to go to the stip. 1008 00:59:57.880 --> 01:00:00.440 We were waiting for simply fashions to open place. My 1009 01:00:00.480 --> 01:00:03.400 mother would get close because they were having a sale 1010 01:00:03.760 --> 01:00:07.519 and five Points is notorious for addicts and unhoused people 1011 01:00:08.119 --> 01:00:10.920 all over the place. And a man came up to 1012 01:00:10.960 --> 01:00:13.480 our car like hey, baby, hey sweet, like something like that, 1013 01:00:13.599 --> 01:00:18.360 Like like he could be trying to flirt with her, 1014 01:00:18.400 --> 01:00:20.480 he'd be trying to get money from her either way. 1015 01:00:20.840 --> 01:00:22.880 And my mother would not even looking at him, just 1016 01:00:22.960 --> 01:00:25.280 rolled the window up and I was like, Mama, he's 1017 01:00:25.320 --> 01:00:27.440 talking to you, And she said, he cannot talk to 1018 01:00:27.480 --> 01:00:29.679 me unless I let him talk to me. I'm not 1019 01:00:29.719 --> 01:00:33.960 talking to him, so like people aren't. And I remember that, 1020 01:00:34.119 --> 01:00:36.760 like did something to my brain, this idea that someone 1021 01:00:36.760 --> 01:00:39.559 could be talking and directing it to you, but you 1022 01:00:40.079 --> 01:00:42.519 don't have to, Like you could only have a conversation 1023 01:00:42.599 --> 01:00:45.239 with me if I let you, Right, if I don't 1024 01:00:45.280 --> 01:00:48.400 let you, you just talking and sit over there and talk. 1025 01:00:48.960 --> 01:00:52.320 But only if I only if I give you permission, 1026 01:00:52.360 --> 01:00:55.599 could we be in a conversation together that like something 1027 01:00:55.719 --> 01:00:57.440 like did that to my brain. I'm not my mother. 1028 01:00:57.480 --> 01:00:59.559 I don't skip lines, and I generally follow the rules. 1029 01:00:59.840 --> 01:01:03.119 But if I were not off my game, I would 1030 01:01:03.239 --> 01:01:06.000 just walk past that lady. But I was like, I 1031 01:01:06.000 --> 01:01:08.480 do have fifteen items or like something like that, because 1032 01:01:08.760 --> 01:01:11.519 the thing is I had many things in my car, 1033 01:01:11.679 --> 01:01:16.039 but I had it was only fifteen items. It wasn't 1034 01:01:16.400 --> 01:01:18.719 it like I had a bunch of yogurt and that 1035 01:01:18.760 --> 01:01:22.079 counts as one item, right. She was like, no, no, no, 1036 01:01:22.119 --> 01:01:24.400 you have to go over to the to those f lines. 1037 01:01:24.719 --> 01:01:28.840 So I went over there. I was annoyed and was 1038 01:01:29.679 --> 01:01:32.079 I nice, No, oh, here's another thing I'm sitting in 1039 01:01:32.079 --> 01:01:33.920 this fucking line. I would have been done by now. 1040 01:01:34.400 --> 01:01:38.079 A man goes over to one of the stuff checkouts. 1041 01:01:38.119 --> 01:01:40.480 I was like, ma'am, you don't see him, what about him? 1042 01:01:40.519 --> 01:01:42.480 What about him? Which is not a thing I would 1043 01:01:42.480 --> 01:01:44.239 normally do, but I was in a mood and she 1044 01:01:44.440 --> 01:01:47.440 was like, he got fifteen items. I was like, oh, 1045 01:01:47.480 --> 01:01:51.840 you can't count, and I went back to so uh. 1046 01:01:52.840 --> 01:01:55.840 You know, we just had verbal conversation. But I told 1047 01:01:55.920 --> 01:01:59.280 my the reason I'm talking about this, And there's another thing. 1048 01:01:59.480 --> 01:02:02.880 I fucking shouldn't have listened to her, And I should 1049 01:02:02.920 --> 01:02:04.719 have just went to the self checkout, because what the 1050 01:02:04.719 --> 01:02:06.960 fuck is she gonna do? Chase me? She can't chase me. 1051 01:02:08.440 --> 01:02:12.079 How how could you chase me? And first of all, 1052 01:02:12.119 --> 01:02:13.760 if you could chase me, I don't think you're great 1053 01:02:13.800 --> 01:02:16.480 at walking. If you could chase me, what you're gonna do, 1054 01:02:16.840 --> 01:02:19.159 I'll already be checking out. You're gonna prevent me from 1055 01:02:19.239 --> 01:02:21.440 checking out. You can't put your hand. No, you can't 1056 01:02:21.440 --> 01:02:23.239 prevent me from checking out. I'll just keep checking out, 1057 01:02:24.559 --> 01:02:26.280 like I'll just keep scanning things and then I'll pay 1058 01:02:26.280 --> 01:02:28.880 for it. I'll leave. You can't put your hands on me. 1059 01:02:29.039 --> 01:02:32.800 That's that's against the rules. You you a rule follower, 1060 01:02:32.840 --> 01:02:35.760 are not me, And if you put your hands on 1061 01:02:35.800 --> 01:02:42.800 me in anger, I'm just gonna push you down because anyway, anyway, 1062 01:02:43.239 --> 01:02:45.800 here's another thing. I was thinking. If you would normally 1063 01:02:45.800 --> 01:02:49.960 fight in a situation and someone is disabled and you 1064 01:02:50.000 --> 01:02:55.039 won't fight them, that's able us because you know disabled 1065 01:02:55.039 --> 01:02:56.480 people can get it too. Ask the blind man I 1066 01:02:56.480 --> 01:02:58.760 push down the stairs, you can get it too. Like 1067 01:02:58.960 --> 01:03:04.599 we're equals, I'll discriminate. So anyway, none of that happened. 1068 01:03:04.679 --> 01:03:06.840 I did not hit anybody. When I used to get 1069 01:03:06.840 --> 01:03:10.800 into verbal and physical altercations in public, my network was 1070 01:03:10.880 --> 01:03:13.480 negative seventy two dollars and I had no children. Now 1071 01:03:13.559 --> 01:03:15.440 it's not the same. I have children. I need to 1072 01:03:15.480 --> 01:03:17.159 be around for them. I don't get into tussles with 1073 01:03:17.199 --> 01:03:20.440 people me Like asking her why she let that do 1074 01:03:20.639 --> 01:03:23.039 go was the was the most I would probably do 1075 01:03:23.159 --> 01:03:26.440 in this day and age. I'm not fighting anybody. I 1076 01:03:26.480 --> 01:03:30.880 did leave, and I was annoyed, and I did think 1077 01:03:30.880 --> 01:03:33.679 to myself, Princess, you're off your game, because normally you 1078 01:03:33.679 --> 01:03:35.639 would not even hear her because you wouldn't be talking 1079 01:03:35.679 --> 01:03:37.599 to her. I didn't have my earbuds in either because 1080 01:03:37.840 --> 01:03:39.599 when I have my earbuds in public all the time, 1081 01:03:39.639 --> 01:03:42.480 so I really am like, I can hear you, I'm 1082 01:03:42.480 --> 01:03:45.360 not interacting with you. And two, she can't fucking chase you. 1083 01:03:45.840 --> 01:03:48.800 I told my mother about this, okay. My mother said, Okay, 1084 01:03:49.360 --> 01:03:51.679 if that happened to me, I would just take my 1085 01:03:51.800 --> 01:03:53.400 car and throw all that shit on top of her 1086 01:03:53.440 --> 01:03:56.679 and leave. And I was like why, she's like, because 1087 01:03:57.400 --> 01:04:00.760 why is she even talking to me? That's what Yvonne is, okay, 1088 01:04:01.199 --> 01:04:08.760 and she has. She has definitely been a source of 1089 01:04:08.800 --> 01:04:11.119 inspiration for me from down to time. We're just not 1090 01:04:11.159 --> 01:04:13.719 the same type of person. We're just not my mother. 1091 01:04:13.880 --> 01:04:18.599 Once in a store she was she was checking out 1092 01:04:18.599 --> 01:04:21.400 with the cashier and the cashier was like, kind of rude, 1093 01:04:22.039 --> 01:04:24.760 and then didn't tell her the total. It was one 1094 01:04:24.760 --> 01:04:26.679 of those places where the thing was turned around, so 1095 01:04:26.719 --> 01:04:29.880 she didn't know what the total was and didn't tell 1096 01:04:29.880 --> 01:04:31.639 her total. So my Mom's just sitting there and the 1097 01:04:31.679 --> 01:04:34.199 cashiers like, well, ain't you gonna pay? And I was like, 1098 01:04:34.239 --> 01:04:36.039 what do you mean, ain't I gonna pay? How much 1099 01:04:36.119 --> 01:04:39.679 is it? And she turned the thing around and pointed 1100 01:04:39.719 --> 01:04:42.320 at it. And at this point, my mother was already 1101 01:04:42.360 --> 01:04:45.119 mad because she was slamming the stuff and she and 1102 01:04:45.159 --> 01:04:47.280 she didn't respond to good morning or whatever. It was 1103 01:04:47.320 --> 01:04:49.599 just a rude interaction. Why did my mother just leave 1104 01:04:49.639 --> 01:04:53.519 that shit there? Leave the store? And like a man 1105 01:04:53.559 --> 01:04:55.079 tried to chase her and was like, man, I help you, 1106 01:04:55.239 --> 01:04:56.880 I'll help you. My mother was like, I don't want 1107 01:04:56.880 --> 01:04:59.679 no fucking help from he hand. She drove to another store, 1108 01:05:00.199 --> 01:05:02.440 another grocery store, just like it and all the same 1109 01:05:02.480 --> 01:05:07.000 shit that. My mother is petty, and so I would 1110 01:05:07.039 --> 01:05:09.280 not describe her as a nice person. She can be kind, 1111 01:05:09.360 --> 01:05:12.079 but she's not a nice person. She's not trying to 1112 01:05:12.079 --> 01:05:15.360 make you feel good, baby, and neither is Lena Dunham's mother. 1113 01:05:16.079 --> 01:05:19.760 She can be very sharp and she has definitely told 1114 01:05:19.880 --> 01:05:25.719 her that. I she's definitely told her some hard truths, 1115 01:05:26.119 --> 01:05:31.000 and I think her and Lena's relationship is fraught. She 1116 01:05:31.079 --> 01:05:34.239 does mention that her grandmother was an anorexic and that 1117 01:05:34.400 --> 01:05:38.159 her three daughters, a lot of things her three daughters 1118 01:05:41.239 --> 01:05:44.840 have inside them comes from living with an anorexic, for 1119 01:05:45.400 --> 01:05:47.559 like their whole lives of whether their mother was gonna 1120 01:05:47.599 --> 01:05:51.239 eat or not. And Lena Dunham's mother is very much 1121 01:05:51.280 --> 01:05:53.079 like you're fat, you gain a lot of weight. You 1122 01:05:53.119 --> 01:05:57.920 gotta do something you gain some weight. She is also 1123 01:05:58.519 --> 01:06:01.719 like Lena was telling her, uh, how she'd met another 1124 01:06:01.800 --> 01:06:03.800 writer in LA when she was new in LA and 1125 01:06:03.840 --> 01:06:06.320 they told her, don't go for any TV jobs or 1126 01:06:06.360 --> 01:06:08.159 something like that, you need to do indie stuff, don't 1127 01:06:08.239 --> 01:06:10.800 you don't want to do TV work. And Lena's mother 1128 01:06:10.960 --> 01:06:13.880 like laughed over the phone and said, she said that 1129 01:06:13.920 --> 01:06:15.800 so you wouldn't go out for the jobs that she wants, 1130 01:06:16.000 --> 01:06:18.840 which many of us would be thinking, but Lena never 1131 01:06:18.920 --> 01:06:22.519 thought that. Uh, when Lena will get to her sickness. 1132 01:06:22.519 --> 01:06:24.599 When Lena's sickness was to the point when they kept 1133 01:06:24.599 --> 01:06:26.920 telling her they wouldn't give her hysterectomy, one of the 1134 01:06:26.920 --> 01:06:30.159 doctors said a hysterectomy takes the soul away from a woman, 1135 01:06:30.440 --> 01:06:35.079 like some real dumb shit. And Lena's mother just like 1136 01:06:35.320 --> 01:06:37.280 toted her to the er after it got real bad 1137 01:06:37.320 --> 01:06:40.119 and was like, get this uterus out of my daughter. 1138 01:06:41.880 --> 01:06:45.840 She's just like she's a top and at one point, 1139 01:06:45.880 --> 01:06:49.239 but she is the type of person that will defend 1140 01:06:49.320 --> 01:06:52.159 Lena to the fucking death. Their relationship can be a 1141 01:06:52.159 --> 01:06:58.360 little fraud, but Lena if you come for Lena, she 1142 01:06:58.559 --> 01:07:02.639 will come for you. So far fucking heard, Like again, 1143 01:07:02.719 --> 01:07:05.760 we'll talk about this. What makes Alena done him exhausting? 1144 01:07:06.880 --> 01:07:10.360 But she's had so many mental health disorders as a child, 1145 01:07:10.400 --> 01:07:15.280 the OCD, the anxiety, just so much shit, and she's 1146 01:07:15.320 --> 01:07:18.719 always needed a lot of care from her parents. And 1147 01:07:20.159 --> 01:07:22.000 one of her mother's friends, she was on the phone 1148 01:07:22.119 --> 01:07:24.599 and Lena overheard was saying, I don't even know how 1149 01:07:24.599 --> 01:07:27.719 she's gonna exist outside your house. And her mother, who 1150 01:07:27.760 --> 01:07:31.760 also thinks Lena is a lot, was defending her hardcore 1151 01:07:31.800 --> 01:07:34.039 and was like, actually, you should be more concerned with 1152 01:07:34.119 --> 01:07:36.719 the amount of sex your daughter's having or something like that. 1153 01:07:37.000 --> 01:07:40.840 And the same when Jenny, Lena's partner called and was like, 1154 01:07:40.840 --> 01:07:42.519 don't you think some of this is in her head? 1155 01:07:42.559 --> 01:07:45.840 And this like her mother like gave it fucking to her. 1156 01:07:46.239 --> 01:07:48.840 But and that's I have a similar mother. My mother 1157 01:07:48.960 --> 01:07:53.440 is a top. My mother is someone that will criticize 1158 01:07:53.440 --> 01:07:56.039 the fuck out of me, but if you try to 1159 01:07:56.079 --> 01:07:58.840 criticize one of her children, she'll be like, how fucking 1160 01:07:59.119 --> 01:08:02.440 dare you? And I remember her, like some kids were 1161 01:08:02.440 --> 01:08:03.920 making fun of me this when I was I used 1162 01:08:03.960 --> 01:08:05.960 to cry all the time, like all the time you 1163 01:08:06.000 --> 01:08:07.880 could say, you could say half a word to me. 1164 01:08:07.960 --> 01:08:11.199 I just burst out in tears. And some kids were 1165 01:08:11.199 --> 01:08:14.159 making if we were in the projects, and some kids 1166 01:08:14.199 --> 01:08:18.000 were making fun of me, and I told my mom, 1167 01:08:18.039 --> 01:08:19.800 and my mom came out of the house and she 1168 01:08:19.920 --> 01:08:24.399 was like screaming at those kids like fuck you, I 1169 01:08:24.399 --> 01:08:27.239 will whoop your ass. I dare you to come over here. 1170 01:08:27.840 --> 01:08:30.159 Get away. Also, I dare to come over and also 1171 01:08:30.159 --> 01:08:32.520 get away from here. Your parents can come out here. 1172 01:08:32.560 --> 01:08:35.560 I fucking fight them too. Yeah, go get your mama. 1173 01:08:35.600 --> 01:08:41.000 You a little bit like and I'm like crying in 1174 01:08:41.000 --> 01:08:44.279 the background, like yeah, mama. You know. Like that's how 1175 01:08:44.319 --> 01:08:46.960 my mom was with us. She would she would come 1176 01:08:47.039 --> 01:08:49.520 up and fight with teachers that not physically fight, but 1177 01:08:49.600 --> 01:08:52.840 be like I don't not with me. I was great, 1178 01:08:52.880 --> 01:08:55.840 but my brother she would have to like fight for 1179 01:08:55.880 --> 01:09:00.640 those things. And like my mother is just that's how she. Okay, 1180 01:09:01.199 --> 01:09:04.319 don't get her height. Okay. She lost me in a 1181 01:09:04.319 --> 01:09:06.159 store one time when I was a baby because she 1182 01:09:06.279 --> 01:09:09.000 was fighting some woman and she just handed me to 1183 01:09:09.039 --> 01:09:11.680 a stranger and then she had to come find me 1184 01:09:11.720 --> 01:09:16.760 after her fight because like I'm just living my best 1185 01:09:16.840 --> 01:09:19.600 life with these strangers this white lady, and I think 1186 01:09:19.600 --> 01:09:22.000 maybe she don't take me home, But my mother showed 1187 01:09:22.079 --> 01:09:24.000 up and I was like, dang, I could have lived 1188 01:09:24.000 --> 01:09:28.359 a good life. No, but that's why my mother's like, 1189 01:09:28.560 --> 01:09:31.359 she like, don't start it with her. Okay, she can 1190 01:09:31.399 --> 01:09:36.640 see very mild mannered, very mild mannered if you meet 1191 01:09:36.680 --> 01:09:39.720 her at church, or if you meet her at the 1192 01:09:40.279 --> 01:09:45.840 in the rooms you know, at her sobriety meetings, but 1193 01:09:47.359 --> 01:09:53.079 not not if you get it, if you get into 1194 01:09:53.119 --> 01:09:55.880 it with her. Not if you get into it, and 1195 01:09:55.920 --> 01:09:57.960 my mom will dodge you for a long time. My 1196 01:09:58.000 --> 01:10:00.840 mother was also the person that taught me that just 1197 01:10:00.960 --> 01:10:03.439 because somebody sent you the message doesn't mean a message 1198 01:10:03.520 --> 01:10:06.760 is for you. Somebody that was with her, somebody that 1199 01:10:06.880 --> 01:10:10.319 sent her a Facebook message asking for money. And she says, oh, 1200 01:10:10.359 --> 01:10:11.720 I don't think this was meant for me, that the 1201 01:10:11.800 --> 01:10:14.239 algorithm or something, the algorithmss is something. I was like, 1202 01:10:14.279 --> 01:10:16.760 what do you mean? It says she's using your name. 1203 01:10:16.760 --> 01:10:19.319 She's like, oh, but she's asking for money, so that's 1204 01:10:19.319 --> 01:10:22.399 not meant for me. And like again this I was 1205 01:10:22.439 --> 01:10:24.359 an adult adult when this happened. I was like, oh, 1206 01:10:24.399 --> 01:10:28.800 you you're right. I can just decide a message isn't 1207 01:10:28.880 --> 01:10:32.119 for me and move on. Even if it was directed 1208 01:10:32.159 --> 01:10:34.239 at me, I can be like, oh nah, that's not 1209 01:10:34.479 --> 01:10:38.199 that's not for me and just let it go, just 1210 01:10:38.319 --> 01:10:41.479 dodge it like the fucking matrix. Like I can do that, 1211 01:10:41.520 --> 01:10:45.039 and I have done that. But I just like shocking, 1212 01:10:45.079 --> 01:10:47.119 and I was like, I was thinking, like, they sent 1213 01:10:47.159 --> 01:10:48.359 me a message, I have to respond to it. And 1214 01:10:48.439 --> 01:10:51.560 my mother is just thinking, hmm, only if I accept 1215 01:10:51.560 --> 01:10:53.520 the message to can I do I have to respond 1216 01:10:53.560 --> 01:10:56.279 to Only if I accept the things you're saying in 1217 01:10:56.319 --> 01:10:58.880 this and I accepted they are for me, do I 1218 01:10:58.920 --> 01:11:01.960 have to respond to you? You have not put the 1219 01:11:01.960 --> 01:11:04.359 correct combination of words in this message, and therefore I 1220 01:11:04.359 --> 01:11:13.039 don't think this is for me. Denied anyway, my mother. 1221 01:11:13.039 --> 01:11:16.199 There's a lot of things like that. Emma Green Lady's 1222 01:11:16.239 --> 01:11:24.199 been talking about three hour three hour parenting. Guys, That 1223 01:11:24.239 --> 01:11:26.800 advice is not for you. If you work at the 1224 01:11:26.800 --> 01:11:28.960 front desk of the insurance office, stand down, it's not 1225 01:11:29.000 --> 01:11:31.199 for you. This is for somebody who wants to oh, 1226 01:11:31.279 --> 01:11:32.800 who wants to be a CEO of a four hundred 1227 01:11:32.800 --> 01:11:36.039 million dollar company. This is for people the type of 1228 01:11:36.039 --> 01:11:39.119 person that would buy a book about how to make 1229 01:11:39.119 --> 01:11:41.880 it in corporate. That's who that is for. Somebody who 1230 01:11:41.880 --> 01:11:43.880 wants to be in the C suite. Somebody who is like, 1231 01:11:45.479 --> 01:11:47.680 I wanna make three hundred thousand dollars this year, that's 1232 01:11:47.840 --> 01:11:51.479 that's who that's for. Okay, dollar store associate, it's not 1233 01:11:51.520 --> 01:11:54.680 for you. So when she says things like I don't 1234 01:11:54.680 --> 01:11:57.600 do this, I don't do that, and I only parent 1235 01:11:57.680 --> 01:11:59.439 three hours a day and I'm and I show up 1236 01:11:59.439 --> 01:12:01.079 for the big thing, but I'm working the rest of 1237 01:12:01.119 --> 01:12:04.439 the time, she's not wrong about that. She's right. That's 1238 01:12:04.520 --> 01:12:06.000 how you have to do it if that's the type 1239 01:12:06.000 --> 01:12:10.319 of career you have. But if that's not the type 1240 01:12:10.359 --> 01:12:13.359 of career you have. Parenting three hours a day and 1241 01:12:13.399 --> 01:12:16.520 you're there seven hours a day, something else is happening. 1242 01:12:17.600 --> 01:12:19.000 And I just want you to know that my mother 1243 01:12:19.039 --> 01:12:22.760 parented an hour and a half a day, even in 1244 01:12:22.840 --> 01:12:24.600 our day off, an hour and a half. Split over 1245 01:12:24.640 --> 01:12:26.520 three kids, get in where you fit in. And if 1246 01:12:26.520 --> 01:12:29.079 your brother took forty five listen, the other two of 1247 01:12:29.159 --> 01:12:31.560 y'all gotta split this forty five minutes because I don't 1248 01:12:31.560 --> 01:12:38.199 have time for you. But emotional neglect. Party of three, 1249 01:12:38.680 --> 01:12:40.359 only one of us really cares about it, though the 1250 01:12:41.119 --> 01:12:45.439 rest is like I don't care. So I was emotionally 1251 01:12:45.479 --> 01:12:48.920 neglected as a child, but at the same time, and 1252 01:12:48.960 --> 01:12:52.600 that's why I was talking about, Like I don't remember 1253 01:12:52.640 --> 01:12:57.760 what documentary I was doing, but someone said that they 1254 01:12:58.600 --> 01:13:01.560 like found their birth mom or they learned more about 1255 01:13:01.560 --> 01:13:04.560 their birth mom, and they were like, Oh, I finally 1256 01:13:04.600 --> 01:13:10.000 felt like someone's baby, And that was I had to 1257 01:13:10.000 --> 01:13:13.239 sit with that for a minute. While I experienced emotional 1258 01:13:13.319 --> 01:13:16.600 neglect as a child, I have never been doubtful that 1259 01:13:16.680 --> 01:13:19.640 I was someone's baby, that I belonged to my mother 1260 01:13:20.039 --> 01:13:22.720 in all ways, that I belonged to her, and that 1261 01:13:23.359 --> 01:13:26.079 did she wanna like talk about my feelings. No, she wanted. 1262 01:13:26.439 --> 01:13:28.039 She wanted to let me know, there's gonna be a 1263 01:13:28.039 --> 01:13:29.920 long life if you keep. If you keep, if you 1264 01:13:29.920 --> 01:13:33.119 can't do nothing, if you upset, if you're gonna land 1265 01:13:33.119 --> 01:13:34.880 on the floor every time you get upset, it's gonna 1266 01:13:34.880 --> 01:13:36.119 be a long life. And I don't have time for 1267 01:13:36.119 --> 01:13:37.479 this shit, cause I'm only parent in an hour and 1268 01:13:37.520 --> 01:13:39.239 a half a day and you're taking up too much 1269 01:13:39.319 --> 01:13:42.239 time right now. Yeah, that's how she that's how she 1270 01:13:42.279 --> 01:13:44.119 dealt with things. She didn't think I had any feelings. 1271 01:13:44.199 --> 01:13:48.000 I was a pet, but nobody could come for me, 1272 01:13:49.520 --> 01:13:54.680 and she would allow that to happen to me. This 1273 01:13:54.760 --> 01:13:56.640 girl was gonna beat my ass cause we were fighting 1274 01:13:56.680 --> 01:13:59.039 over my first boyfriend. She was calling a house threatening 1275 01:13:59.079 --> 01:14:03.359 to beat my ass. My mom, uh, got over, got 1276 01:14:03.399 --> 01:14:05.159 on the phone. It was basically, I dare your ass 1277 01:14:05.159 --> 01:14:07.560 to come here. I dare you to come here, and 1278 01:14:07.600 --> 01:14:12.399 don't ever call my number again. Like she's not having it, 1279 01:14:12.399 --> 01:14:14.159 And she got the phone to cuss me out because 1280 01:14:14.279 --> 01:14:16.760 she was like, I don't know why you fight. He 1281 01:14:16.840 --> 01:14:19.720 is not worth that. This is not how you handle yourself. 1282 01:14:19.800 --> 01:14:22.720 Like she cuss me the fuck out. But she was 1283 01:14:22.800 --> 01:14:25.239 on the phone letting that woman know if you want it, 1284 01:14:25.279 --> 01:14:29.880 come get it. I dare you too. That was a 1285 01:14:29.880 --> 01:14:31.920 grown woman too. That was a grown woman with kids. 1286 01:14:32.199 --> 01:14:37.520 And I was like, maybe eighteen, maybe I might have 1287 01:14:37.560 --> 01:14:44.760 been seventeen. I was like, anyway, Lena listening to Lena's 1288 01:14:44.800 --> 01:14:47.640 mom throughout this, but they're very en messed. Lena needs 1289 01:14:47.680 --> 01:14:50.159 them for every fucking thing. Her dad's a little softer, 1290 01:14:50.720 --> 01:14:54.720 but again, they're New York artists. A lot of things 1291 01:14:54.800 --> 01:14:58.279 that they think are normal is not normal. A lot 1292 01:14:58.319 --> 01:15:00.880 of things when the family gets to together. They're very 1293 01:15:00.960 --> 01:15:07.079 like intellectual talk, very like who can who can talk 1294 01:15:07.119 --> 01:15:09.239 the most and who can have the most thoughts and 1295 01:15:09.239 --> 01:15:11.520 who can relate that to the most to the most 1296 01:15:11.560 --> 01:15:15.039 like it's Jack talked about going to dinner with them 1297 01:15:15.239 --> 01:15:17.800 being like exhausting, and I was like, yeah, it sound 1298 01:15:17.840 --> 01:15:24.399 the sounds like they're exhausting. Her parents are. They don't 1299 01:15:24.479 --> 01:15:28.199 understand fame. They don't understand how much and Lena wants it. 1300 01:15:28.359 --> 01:15:31.319 By the way, Lena did not get famous accidentally. And 1301 01:15:31.439 --> 01:15:34.319 Lena at the beginning wanted to go to everything. She 1302 01:15:34.319 --> 01:15:35.800 wanted to go to every red carpet, she wanted to 1303 01:15:35.800 --> 01:15:38.760 go to every interview she want. She's talking about being 1304 01:15:39.560 --> 01:15:43.239 on a talk show in Norway that went on for 1305 01:15:43.279 --> 01:15:45.520 like seven hours and people kept joining the couch and 1306 01:15:45.560 --> 01:15:47.520 stuff like that. I was like, why were you on that? 1307 01:15:48.199 --> 01:15:50.640 Because she said yes to everything, and her parents were like, no, 1308 01:15:50.680 --> 01:15:52.239 you don't have to do that. No do you need 1309 01:15:52.279 --> 01:15:54.760 to slow down, No you can't see out of your 1310 01:15:54.800 --> 01:16:00.399 left eye, which brings me to our parents. We're always 1311 01:16:00.399 --> 01:16:11.159 there by the way, which brings me to I don't 1312 01:16:11.560 --> 01:16:15.720 don't don't mistake me here. Lena Dunham is exhausting. To 1313 01:16:15.920 --> 01:16:20.359 be in her orbit is exhausting. Okay. Again, she's she 1314 01:16:20.520 --> 01:16:27.079 has so many mental disorders, so many therapy appointments. She 1315 01:16:27.159 --> 01:16:30.920 processes through talking and through writing, so it is a 1316 01:16:30.920 --> 01:16:34.239 stream of consciousness at all time. Again, she's very self aware. 1317 01:16:34.319 --> 01:16:36.680 She is not situationally aware, and she does not she 1318 01:16:36.840 --> 01:16:39.720 doesn't have the emotional intelligends. She doesn't. That doesn't extend 1319 01:16:39.760 --> 01:16:44.199 to other people. She during the course of this book, 1320 01:16:45.560 --> 01:16:53.800 she had to what was this saying? She had to like, 1321 01:16:53.880 --> 01:16:58.000 she's she's the talent on Girls and the creator and 1322 01:16:58.079 --> 01:17:01.039 the writer, so she have to be like, I can't 1323 01:17:01.079 --> 01:17:04.319 go to the Emmys this year because my cousin died. 1324 01:17:04.479 --> 01:17:06.960 And I want to say this, I have, like I 1325 01:17:06.960 --> 01:17:10.239 don't even remember anymore. I have like thirty six forty one, 1326 01:17:10.399 --> 01:17:12.760 a lot of fucking cousins. I cannot throw a rock 1327 01:17:12.800 --> 01:17:14.920 without hitting a first cousin because my both of my 1328 01:17:15.000 --> 01:17:22.399 parents come from very large families, all right, I that 1329 01:17:25.119 --> 01:17:29.159 saying your cousin died can mean many things. And if 1330 01:17:29.159 --> 01:17:32.079 you come from a small family like Lena does, where 1331 01:17:32.800 --> 01:17:37.159 I Lena might have three cousins maybe four, okay, and 1332 01:17:37.239 --> 01:17:43.199 so you are much closer with your cousins than someone 1333 01:17:43.239 --> 01:17:46.199 who has thirty seven cousins, right, I got a few cousins. 1334 01:17:46.239 --> 01:17:48.439 I like, when I moved back to this area, I 1335 01:17:48.479 --> 01:17:51.600 got a grocery delivery, it was my cousin. I'm I'm 1336 01:17:51.680 --> 01:17:53.880 running into people. I haven't lived in the area where 1337 01:17:53.880 --> 01:17:55.520 people can recognize me from high school for a really 1338 01:17:55.600 --> 01:17:58.359 long time. People are recognizing me from high school, and 1339 01:17:58.439 --> 01:18:06.720 my cousins are everywhere. But Lena's cousin died, her grandma died. 1340 01:18:07.560 --> 01:18:10.760 She need to be here for this, she need to 1341 01:18:10.760 --> 01:18:13.560 be here for that. So she was always like not 1342 01:18:13.640 --> 01:18:17.800 at work. Then we talk about her illnesses and I'll 1343 01:18:17.920 --> 01:18:20.640 list them out. But she had so many surgery for this, 1344 01:18:21.479 --> 01:18:26.520 uh disassociated disorder for that and what it reminded me of, 1345 01:18:26.680 --> 01:18:30.760 and like, so imagine you being her business partner, and 1346 01:18:30.960 --> 01:18:34.640 every six months Lena can't be at work and it 1347 01:18:34.720 --> 01:18:37.279 might not be every six months, every two months. I 1348 01:18:37.560 --> 01:18:43.359 this is happening. That's happening. My cat died. Like I 1349 01:18:43.439 --> 01:18:46.840 broke my elbow. It was my uterus. I took my 1350 01:18:46.920 --> 01:18:49.680 uterus out. No, it's not my uterus now it's now 1351 01:18:49.720 --> 01:18:55.239 it's uh. Now it's Eller. Daniel's sister Eler elos Edie 1352 01:18:55.800 --> 01:19:00.159 s the it's a joint in connective tissue disorder and 1353 01:19:00.199 --> 01:19:02.319 now it's that. Oh, I need to go to rehab 1354 01:19:02.439 --> 01:19:09.199 like it is exhausting. And I know from experience because 1355 01:19:09.199 --> 01:19:11.640 my early twenties were just like this. Although she wasn't 1356 01:19:11.680 --> 01:19:13.199 in her early twenties when a lot of this happened. 1357 01:19:13.560 --> 01:19:16.359 I was, like I thought, I thought Lena Dunham was 1358 01:19:16.439 --> 01:19:19.600 like thirty when she left Public Eye for a lot 1359 01:19:19.600 --> 01:19:22.039 of stuff, she was more closer to like thirty four. 1360 01:19:23.199 --> 01:19:26.279 She wasn't in her twenties when all this is happening. 1361 01:19:26.439 --> 01:19:29.960 My early twenties were fucking chaos, straight chaos all the time. 1362 01:19:30.079 --> 01:19:35.239 Something was happening. My car was stolen. I got fired 1363 01:19:35.239 --> 01:19:43.359 from this job for stealing U fried fish. My boyfriend 1364 01:19:43.439 --> 01:19:46.600 is sleeping with an older woman. Now he's homeless. Now 1365 01:19:46.640 --> 01:19:48.319 I need to pawn this so he can get a 1366 01:19:48.359 --> 01:19:55.319 hotel room. I went to North Carolina in the middle 1367 01:19:55.359 --> 01:19:58.560 of the night because my other boyfriend went down there 1368 01:19:58.600 --> 01:20:02.520 to work like do did, and dentured server to thing 1369 01:20:03.000 --> 01:20:06.560 at like a restaurant down there for the summer. It 1370 01:20:06.600 --> 01:20:09.479 went down there. I actually ended up sleeping with somebody 1371 01:20:09.479 --> 01:20:12.720 else down there, and the bed had fleas. I think 1372 01:20:12.720 --> 01:20:14.960 it did. And now I have a sty in my 1373 01:20:15.039 --> 01:20:19.720 eye and I broke the mirror on the car. I 1374 01:20:19.720 --> 01:20:24.840 can't come into work today, okay. That like every time 1375 01:20:24.880 --> 01:20:30.159 you would talk to me, I'd be like, they'd be like, oh, 1376 01:20:30.680 --> 01:20:33.880 how was today? I like, I did you call me? 1377 01:20:33.920 --> 01:20:37.319 And I'd be like, sorry, I can't talk. I had 1378 01:20:37.359 --> 01:20:42.159 a suicide attempt last night. Uh, looks like I might 1379 01:20:42.199 --> 01:20:45.600 have to stay here, or like I'm your partner on 1380 01:20:45.640 --> 01:20:49.399 a on a something in class and like I just 1381 01:20:49.439 --> 01:20:51.159 don't do the work and you come by my house. 1382 01:20:51.159 --> 01:20:54.920 I've been sleeping for four days, like just shit. It 1383 01:20:55.000 --> 01:20:59.399 was always some thing. I locked myself out of the 1384 01:20:59.399 --> 01:21:03.359 house three times in one day, three times in one day. 1385 01:21:04.000 --> 01:21:05.600 The first time I got in through the window, but 1386 01:21:05.640 --> 01:21:07.159 then like I closed one because I was like this 1387 01:21:07.199 --> 01:21:10.840 is dangerous, and then I locked out again. I don't 1388 01:21:10.840 --> 01:21:12.640 know why. I think I had my car keys and 1389 01:21:12.680 --> 01:21:14.680 my home keys on different keys. Why would I do that? 1390 01:21:14.880 --> 01:21:23.560 Why would I do that? Mm hmm, that's uh. I 1391 01:21:23.600 --> 01:21:27.960 had sex with I met a guy at a bus stop, 1392 01:21:28.319 --> 01:21:31.239 got in his car, went to his house, had sex 1393 01:21:31.239 --> 01:21:33.279 with him, and then he drove me to where I 1394 01:21:33.399 --> 01:21:36.119 was going on the bus. Why what the fuck would 1395 01:21:36.119 --> 01:21:40.600 I be doing that. I'm working at dunkin Donuts. I 1396 01:21:40.600 --> 01:21:42.560 don't want to work, and it's like catacorn to my 1397 01:21:42.600 --> 01:21:44.800 dorm room. I don't want to work at dunk Donuts anymore, 1398 01:21:44.840 --> 01:21:47.800 so I just don't go in. They call me. My 1399 01:21:47.920 --> 01:21:50.680 lights are on, they can see me, and I'm not 1400 01:21:50.760 --> 01:21:53.359 answering the phone. They're leaving messages like prisons, we can 1401 01:21:53.399 --> 01:21:56.520 see you. Why would I do that? I started dating 1402 01:21:56.520 --> 01:22:01.359 a thirty year old man when I was eighteen. He 1403 01:22:01.439 --> 01:22:04.600 lived with his mom. Because any thirty year old, the 1404 01:22:04.600 --> 01:22:08.159 once a day to eighteen year old is a fucking loser. Okay, 1405 01:22:08.920 --> 01:22:11.000 didn't know that then, or maybe I did know that. 1406 01:22:11.239 --> 01:22:13.199 You know, I didn't have a lot of this man. 1407 01:22:14.680 --> 01:22:19.960 We spent a lot of time in hotels together. My 1408 01:22:20.439 --> 01:22:23.119 father called my dorm room and I just wasn't there 1409 01:22:23.159 --> 01:22:25.439 for twenty four hours and he was somewhere else, so 1410 01:22:25.479 --> 01:22:27.840 he called my mother. My mother is freaking out. She's 1411 01:22:27.880 --> 01:22:29.439 supposed to take one of my friends at the airport 1412 01:22:29.479 --> 01:22:31.359 so he can go home for a break. She doesn't 1413 01:22:31.359 --> 01:22:34.960 because she cannot even breathe. He's calling me, being like, bitch, 1414 01:22:35.000 --> 01:22:38.439 you're my ride. Where are you? And I'm in a 1415 01:22:38.479 --> 01:22:41.399 hotel on the beach front with a man that is 1416 01:22:41.439 --> 01:22:46.479 too old for me and it's too and also is 1417 01:22:46.520 --> 01:22:52.920 not attractive and sometimes is abusive, and so then okay, 1418 01:22:53.279 --> 01:22:56.319 then I decided I don't want to do that either, 1419 01:22:56.359 --> 01:22:58.359 so just go to him. He tries to come up 1420 01:22:58.399 --> 01:23:01.439 to my dorm room. He tells them he's my father 1421 01:23:02.920 --> 01:23:04.840 because I don't answer the phone, right, I don't answer 1422 01:23:04.880 --> 01:23:06.600 the phone. He tells me to my father, can they 1423 01:23:06.680 --> 01:23:09.079 let him in my room? They called? The security calls 1424 01:23:09.119 --> 01:23:10.399 me up. I was like, that is not my father. 1425 01:23:10.439 --> 01:23:12.479 I don't know what you're talking about. They tell him 1426 01:23:12.479 --> 01:23:14.800 they were gonna call the police on him. He stands 1427 01:23:14.880 --> 01:23:19.319 in the in the parking lot, screaming my name for 1428 01:23:19.560 --> 01:23:25.199 over an hour. Over an hour. I've told you the 1429 01:23:25.239 --> 01:23:28.840 stories of being in another abusive relationship in which we 1430 01:23:28.840 --> 01:23:31.680 were fighting so hard that the police came into our 1431 01:23:31.720 --> 01:23:35.479 apartment and we didn't even notice. And when they were 1432 01:23:35.479 --> 01:23:41.079 like hey, and we're like, oh, what's up me? Domestic violence? 1433 01:23:41.760 --> 01:23:46.720 None of that happened over here? What you mean us? 1434 01:23:47.159 --> 01:23:52.159 We were practicing our wrestling. We're both ww like, I 1435 01:23:52.319 --> 01:23:55.880 can't like my early twenties were like when I tell you, 1436 01:23:55.920 --> 01:23:59.279 my early twenties were not good, and I don't have 1437 01:23:59.359 --> 01:24:02.399 a lot of like like like, I missed a lot 1438 01:24:02.399 --> 01:24:06.600 of pop culture because I was in a cyclone of 1439 01:24:06.600 --> 01:24:09.840 my own making. My parents were like, are you on drugs? 1440 01:24:09.880 --> 01:24:12.079 And I was like, I wish I was on drugs. 1441 01:24:12.239 --> 01:24:14.319 I wish I was on drugs. I wish I was drunk, 1442 01:24:14.439 --> 01:24:16.159 because then we could go to you could send me 1443 01:24:16.159 --> 01:24:18.680 to rehab, and I could stop doing this. I don't 1444 01:24:18.680 --> 01:24:22.720 know why, I don't know why this is happening, and 1445 01:24:22.800 --> 01:24:25.520 I know for a fucking fact that I was exhausting 1446 01:24:26.000 --> 01:24:29.000 to every person that I was. I was exhausting. You 1447 01:24:29.000 --> 01:24:30.800 didn't want to hear. You just be like, Princess Howard 1448 01:24:30.800 --> 01:24:32.600 was your weekend. I just start telling you shit and 1449 01:24:32.640 --> 01:24:37.359 you'd be like, what what? Why would you do that? 1450 01:24:38.479 --> 01:24:42.319 Why did that happen? Why were you even there that 1451 01:24:42.319 --> 01:24:44.399 that's the type of shit that would happen. And my 1452 01:24:44.479 --> 01:24:48.279 friends were Oh, at the time, my first boyfriend had 1453 01:24:48.319 --> 01:24:50.640 gotten one of my friends pregnant. He got in two 1454 01:24:50.640 --> 01:24:53.079 of my friends pregnant in high school. But we're just 1455 01:24:53.159 --> 01:24:55.079 leaving high school and I was very close to this 1456 01:24:55.159 --> 01:24:56.800 friend and so I just had to take it. And 1457 01:24:56.840 --> 01:24:58.479 she was giving a baby for adoption, so I'd just 1458 01:24:58.520 --> 01:25:01.000 be chilling with her all the time, and her racist 1459 01:25:01.039 --> 01:25:03.760 parents who didn't know the baby that was in her 1460 01:25:03.880 --> 01:25:07.920 was black, they just knew she was gonna Why was 1461 01:25:07.960 --> 01:25:11.920 I doing that? And then me and that boyfriend broke up. 1462 01:25:12.319 --> 01:25:16.359 Then he wanted to appall. He wanted to propose to 1463 01:25:16.600 --> 01:25:21.399 his baby mama, who he had cheated on me with 1464 01:25:21.439 --> 01:25:28.279 and gotten her pregnant, and I helped him figure out 1465 01:25:28.319 --> 01:25:31.439 a way to propose to her, and then we had sex. 1466 01:25:31.720 --> 01:25:35.600 What were we doing? Why was I doing this? Why 1467 01:25:35.640 --> 01:25:42.039 was I doing this? Nobody knows. And so when Lena 1468 01:25:42.119 --> 01:25:44.359 is talking about these bad relationships in with this drug 1469 01:25:44.359 --> 01:25:47.479 addict who also has all these crazy seizures, and she 1470 01:25:47.520 --> 01:25:51.439 doesn't realize that with uh when she's I mean, when 1471 01:25:51.479 --> 01:25:53.800 she's talking about being with the guy who hated her, 1472 01:25:53.880 --> 01:25:55.880 who she talked about this in her first book, who 1473 01:25:55.960 --> 01:26:00.680 would like like say, like poor help things through, or 1474 01:26:00.760 --> 01:26:03.039 they're having sex like chuck on my cock things like that, 1475 01:26:03.600 --> 01:26:07.720 and would like and who it's not the same person 1476 01:26:07.800 --> 01:26:10.359 that she was having sex when they took the condom 1477 01:26:10.359 --> 01:26:17.199 off and like like, uh, finished inside her without her 1478 01:26:18.800 --> 01:26:22.600 her consent, she would She's naming all these these relationships 1479 01:26:22.600 --> 01:26:27.920 and even Jack. Be honest, Jack's relationship with her is weird. 1480 01:26:28.279 --> 01:26:30.960 Do on paper they make sense? Yeah, she's a quirky 1481 01:26:31.000 --> 01:26:35.600 indie girls you know, writer, and he's in the band 1482 01:26:35.760 --> 01:26:39.840 and he's also like he did it Scarlett Johansson, and 1483 01:26:39.880 --> 01:26:43.720 he's like quirky and fun and he's really into music. 1484 01:26:43.880 --> 01:26:46.359 By the way, in the book, she's like, I can't 1485 01:26:46.359 --> 01:26:50.159 believe he he dated Scarlet Johansson. I saw a picture 1486 01:26:50.199 --> 01:26:52.000 of the two of them. They look why wouldn't they 1487 01:26:52.039 --> 01:26:54.239 be dating? They look like they came from the same place. 1488 01:26:54.560 --> 01:26:56.680 They look like they know each other from school or something. 1489 01:26:56.960 --> 01:27:00.760 Don't nobody's ever looked more like they should be together 1490 01:27:00.800 --> 01:27:04.159 than those two people. What are you talking about? And like, 1491 01:27:06.319 --> 01:27:11.039 on paper it made sense Jack and Lena. But like 1492 01:27:11.079 --> 01:27:14.319 I said, Jack, Lena is exhausting. I don't think Jack 1493 01:27:14.319 --> 01:27:16.640 Antonov wanted to be written about and does and won't 1494 01:27:16.640 --> 01:27:18.039 want to be written about. But he comes out pretty 1495 01:27:18.079 --> 01:27:21.600 good in this. She does not say she thinks that 1496 01:27:21.640 --> 01:27:24.079 he's spending too much time with Lord and that Lord 1497 01:27:24.119 --> 01:27:28.760 calls her Auntie Lena, which but she does not confirm 1498 01:27:28.840 --> 01:27:31.039 that he cheated on her. She does mention the power point. 1499 01:27:31.119 --> 01:27:33.439 She says that plower point was so convincing that she 1500 01:27:33.560 --> 01:27:36.239 thought that did it convince her things that she was 1501 01:27:36.239 --> 01:27:38.720 there for it didn't happen like she she was like, damn, 1502 01:27:38.720 --> 01:27:41.479 this is a good power point, which I appreciate her 1503 01:27:41.479 --> 01:27:44.319 acknowledging because that person put she actually DM the person, 1504 01:27:44.479 --> 01:27:47.479 and the person was like, didn't even really like her 1505 01:27:47.960 --> 01:27:56.319 and was like what girl like. But for the most part, 1506 01:27:57.199 --> 01:28:00.359 I think Jack comes off well. But a lot of 1507 01:28:00.399 --> 01:28:03.640 what she did with him, their relationship died well before 1508 01:28:03.720 --> 01:28:08.159 I would say, maybe years before they broke up. When 1509 01:28:08.239 --> 01:28:10.640 Lena is recovering from her hysterectomy, she doesn't even go home. 1510 01:28:10.800 --> 01:28:14.199 She goes to her parents' house. Well, he's not really 1511 01:28:14.199 --> 01:28:17.000 around da da da da. That's not how somebody who 1512 01:28:17.039 --> 01:28:20.319 loves you talks about you like he just a lot 1513 01:28:20.319 --> 01:28:23.000 of their relationship was just visiting. He didn't have his phone, 1514 01:28:23.039 --> 01:28:26.399 he was on a mountain shooting a video. He was like, 1515 01:28:28.560 --> 01:28:30.680 a lot of their relationship wasn't there, and it didn't. 1516 01:28:30.760 --> 01:28:36.119 And although it seemed like he did, like try to 1517 01:28:36.199 --> 01:28:38.199 pull her out of the cyclone, a lot of the times, 1518 01:28:38.880 --> 01:28:41.520 I just don't think. And he didn't like they fought 1519 01:28:41.560 --> 01:28:45.159 all the time. He didn't like her parents. Their families 1520 01:28:45.159 --> 01:28:47.960 were very different. She tried to mold into who she wanted, 1521 01:28:48.560 --> 01:28:51.840 who he wanted her to be, like just all of that, 1522 01:28:52.039 --> 01:28:56.039 and she used a lot of by being with him. 1523 01:28:56.840 --> 01:28:58.800 Like I just said about Lindy West, it was proof 1524 01:28:58.880 --> 01:29:01.319 that she is lovable, proof that as a fat woman, 1525 01:29:01.359 --> 01:29:07.399 that she has something and that she wants to and 1526 01:29:07.439 --> 01:29:12.319 that she has value. This is a Internet conversation, by 1527 01:29:12.359 --> 01:29:15.039 the way, This is an Internet conversation, especially when people 1528 01:29:15.079 --> 01:29:17.119 are like, oh, women only want the top ten percent 1529 01:29:17.159 --> 01:29:19.560 of men, and only if you look a certain way 1530 01:29:19.560 --> 01:29:22.039 can you get a can you find a partner? That's 1531 01:29:22.079 --> 01:29:24.479 an Internet conversation. Cause if you live in real life, 1532 01:29:24.520 --> 01:29:28.039 you see people and not every not everybody's beautiful. You 1533 01:29:28.079 --> 01:29:30.680 see people pair it up all the fucking time. Sometimes 1534 01:29:30.720 --> 01:29:32.239 one is beautiful and the other one is it. Sometimes 1535 01:29:32.239 --> 01:29:35.439 it's two ugly people together whatever. Sometimes it's two amazingly 1536 01:29:35.479 --> 01:29:37.960 hot people. I was in a Walmart. I saw two 1537 01:29:38.079 --> 01:29:40.359 tall ass people. They were both over six feet tall, 1538 01:29:40.479 --> 01:29:42.680 just a holding hands and shit. I had to look up, 1539 01:29:42.680 --> 01:29:45.760 but I saw 'em. I was like, Damn, y'all found 1540 01:29:45.760 --> 01:29:47.640 each other, didn't you, Probably cause you could see over 1541 01:29:47.640 --> 01:29:50.840 the heads of everybody else. How could you not see 1542 01:29:50.840 --> 01:29:53.119 each other in the crowd There's only one person as 1543 01:29:53.159 --> 01:29:55.720 tall as you, and they just holding hands and shit. 1544 01:29:55.960 --> 01:29:59.319 People find each other all the time. You can convince 1545 01:29:59.359 --> 01:30:02.399 yourself that nobody will want you, but it's just not 1546 01:30:02.520 --> 01:30:07.640 fucking true. Who what's going on is people you don't 1547 01:30:07.640 --> 01:30:10.800 want want you. That's what's going on. But like if 1548 01:30:10.800 --> 01:30:13.119 fat people get chills all the time, fat people get 1549 01:30:13.119 --> 01:30:15.399 fucked all the time. I'm here to tell you that, 1550 01:30:16.119 --> 01:30:19.680 all right. I'm here to tell you I spent my 1551 01:30:19.720 --> 01:30:22.680 twenties fucking my way through this world. All right. I've 1552 01:30:22.680 --> 01:30:26.079 had sex with every with a member of every single 1553 01:30:26.239 --> 01:30:30.920 armed forces. I have like bingo card. Fat people get fucked, 1554 01:30:30.960 --> 01:30:34.319 Fat people get in relationships, Fat people get loved all 1555 01:30:34.479 --> 01:30:38.319 the time. This narrative that they don't is something that 1556 01:30:38.439 --> 01:30:43.319 is for movies and internet discourse and stuff. Check out 1557 01:30:43.319 --> 01:30:45.760 the fat people in your life. The bitch has got 1558 01:30:45.760 --> 01:30:49.199 a man. I was watching My six hundred pound Life. 1559 01:30:49.199 --> 01:30:51.600 I remember that girl. Her name was Lisa, and she 1560 01:30:51.720 --> 01:30:54.560 had like maggots coming out of her leg and she 1561 01:30:54.720 --> 01:30:57.319 had a man. Okay, almost all the people on six 1562 01:30:57.560 --> 01:31:02.359 six hundred pound life got somebody. Because it's not a 1563 01:31:02.399 --> 01:31:05.800 myth that fat that people won't fuck with fat people. 1564 01:31:05.840 --> 01:31:09.000 They do all the time, but it's a very specific 1565 01:31:09.159 --> 01:31:11.359 like it's so much hard to be a white woman 1566 01:31:11.359 --> 01:31:13.359 to be fat. I've just given it to you. I 1567 01:31:14.119 --> 01:31:16.840 just assume like white women are expected to be skinny. 1568 01:31:16.840 --> 01:31:21.920 White women are expected to look like preteens with big boobs, right, 1569 01:31:22.239 --> 01:31:24.960 their bodies are supposed to be are well not. I mean, 1570 01:31:26.119 --> 01:31:28.399 you know, we in an ass world right now. But 1571 01:31:28.439 --> 01:31:31.760 for the most part, for most of known history, white 1572 01:31:31.800 --> 01:31:34.880 women are expected to be up and down. No hips, 1573 01:31:35.439 --> 01:31:39.279 no hips, no ass, big ass titties, right. That is, 1574 01:31:40.039 --> 01:31:43.199 that was the ideal shape. And as a Black woman, 1575 01:31:43.840 --> 01:31:47.039 that was never the ideal shape for me. Not Growing up, 1576 01:31:47.600 --> 01:31:49.640 people expect you have junk in the trunk, They expect 1577 01:31:49.640 --> 01:31:51.680 you to have all this. Don't worry. Black people hate 1578 01:31:51.680 --> 01:31:54.880 fat people too. Don't worry. They hate the fat people too. 1579 01:31:55.279 --> 01:31:59.720 They hate fats engaged just like everybody else. But people 1580 01:32:00.199 --> 01:32:01.520 to you to have curves and if you had a 1581 01:32:01.560 --> 01:32:06.159 little billy, wasn't deal like you could be considered obeste 1582 01:32:06.920 --> 01:32:11.800 if you were in certain situations and just fine in others, 1583 01:32:12.039 --> 01:32:14.439 and fat people get chills all the time. I do 1584 01:32:14.520 --> 01:32:20.000 not understand where people can't figure that out. But yeah, Lena, 1585 01:32:20.319 --> 01:32:23.159 that's how Lena. She needed Jack in that way, and 1586 01:32:23.199 --> 01:32:25.520 their breakup took a really long time. She talks about cheating. 1587 01:32:25.800 --> 01:32:30.199 The next person she dates is Nick, and he is crazy, 1588 01:32:30.640 --> 01:32:32.359 but she cheated with him the night before they broke 1589 01:32:32.439 --> 01:32:33.960 up because she just knew they were gonna wreak up. 1590 01:32:36.039 --> 01:32:40.760 Lena said something that I think is so like insightful. 1591 01:32:40.880 --> 01:32:43.960 She said that she treated love like one of those 1592 01:32:44.159 --> 01:32:47.159 car contests where you go to a dealership and you 1593 01:32:47.399 --> 01:32:49.920 and whoever keeps their hand on the car the longest wins. 1594 01:32:52.640 --> 01:32:57.640 Relationships and love were humiliation rituals for her. You could 1595 01:32:57.640 --> 01:33:00.239 not be in a relationship if you weren't humiliated, if 1596 01:33:00.279 --> 01:33:03.479 it didn't hurt a little bit, if it didn't or 1597 01:33:03.600 --> 01:33:07.640 hurt a lot, if it didn't cause you strain, if 1598 01:33:07.640 --> 01:33:10.359 you didn't have to piss on yourself while while having 1599 01:33:10.359 --> 01:33:12.960 your hand on a car. You know what I mean. Like, 1600 01:33:13.039 --> 01:33:15.239 that's what love was. And two great loves of her 1601 01:33:15.239 --> 01:33:18.039 life were Jack and Jenny, And that meant you had 1602 01:33:18.079 --> 01:33:22.000 to take whatever they gave you. Yep, they're drinking and 1603 01:33:22.039 --> 01:33:23.680 they had a seizure in the middle of the night 1604 01:33:24.039 --> 01:33:27.520 in which they hit you, and that's even more reason 1605 01:33:27.560 --> 01:33:32.479 to stay with them. Okay, they are homeless and you're 1606 01:33:32.520 --> 01:33:34.960 not quite sure that you know that they're homeless, and 1607 01:33:35.119 --> 01:33:38.479 they stay with your parents while you go live somewhere else. 1608 01:33:38.640 --> 01:33:42.760 By the way, again, she treats her parents as emotional 1609 01:33:42.760 --> 01:33:46.439 support blankets, and also they can just take anything. That 1610 01:33:46.520 --> 01:33:52.199 tiny furniture movie her mother. Lena found her mother's journals, 1611 01:33:52.279 --> 01:33:56.880 read them and wrote a movie. And I'm sure her 1612 01:33:56.880 --> 01:33:58.479 mother wasn't excited about that, but she was in the 1613 01:33:58.479 --> 01:34:00.000 movie and it was in their house, so I guess 1614 01:34:00.039 --> 01:34:03.199 it was fine. But like, that's how that's what love 1615 01:34:03.279 --> 01:34:05.159 means to Lena. I don't know if it's still, but 1616 01:34:05.159 --> 01:34:06.920 that she described it that way, I was like, Yeah, 1617 01:34:07.159 --> 01:34:10.760 a lot of people think love just means how like 1618 01:34:11.039 --> 01:34:14.399 how much humiliation can you take? Because the more you take, 1619 01:34:14.439 --> 01:34:17.359 the more you earn this relationship. If you can just 1620 01:34:17.439 --> 01:34:29.319 keep your hand right here, like I said, I I 1621 01:34:29.319 --> 01:34:32.560 think Jack comes up pretty well in this, I don't 1622 01:34:32.600 --> 01:34:37.000 think and most of their friends went on his side. 1623 01:34:37.039 --> 01:34:42.399 I don't think that Lena wrote him very badly, except 1624 01:34:42.479 --> 01:34:46.720 for the part where, uh, it just became obvious that 1625 01:34:46.720 --> 01:34:48.960 if he wasn't cheating with Lord, he was spending he 1626 01:34:49.000 --> 01:34:52.720 was having an emotional affair with law Law Lord, and 1627 01:34:53.520 --> 01:34:55.439 that's all the pool stuff people pulled down. I was like, 1628 01:34:56.239 --> 01:34:58.680 I don't know if that matters, you know, I want 1629 01:34:58.720 --> 01:35:01.119 to talk real quick about Adam Drive when we talk 1630 01:35:01.159 --> 01:35:06.039 about love stuff, Adam Driver. Lena is attracted to the 1631 01:35:06.079 --> 01:35:09.000 Adam Driver because he reminds her of all the chaos 1632 01:35:09.000 --> 01:35:12.079 demons that she's in love with. He is erratical on set. 1633 01:35:12.159 --> 01:35:15.479 They try to he's he's a weird actor, that is 1634 01:35:15.520 --> 01:35:19.199 what he is. Okay, he often is, you know, doing 1635 01:35:19.239 --> 01:35:24.199 method acting where he's just like staying in character. One 1636 01:35:24.239 --> 01:35:26.840 time they tried to sing Happy Birds' Birthday to him, 1637 01:35:27.159 --> 01:35:29.399 and he just ran away, like out the back door. 1638 01:35:29.479 --> 01:35:31.359 And then his agent called and was like, don't ever 1639 01:35:31.399 --> 01:35:36.600 try to surprise him like shit like that, you know, 1640 01:35:36.840 --> 01:35:47.239 Like she just like he would scream at her when 1641 01:35:47.239 --> 01:35:50.199 she didn't know her lines and throw chairs and like, 1642 01:35:51.880 --> 01:35:54.359 outside of set, he was very nice to her. They 1643 01:35:54.399 --> 01:35:56.760 would spend time together. They had a lot of sex 1644 01:35:56.800 --> 01:36:00.600 scenes together, obviously, so there's just a certain amount of 1645 01:36:01.000 --> 01:36:04.319 things that or a certain level of comfort that they 1646 01:36:04.359 --> 01:36:06.680 would have together, that they would have to have together, 1647 01:36:07.479 --> 01:36:12.520 this before intimacy coordinators on set. So I mean she's 1648 01:36:12.560 --> 01:36:14.159 got a band aid on her butt hole and like 1649 01:36:14.199 --> 01:36:16.800 a little thing on her cover and her clip and 1650 01:36:17.000 --> 01:36:24.000 off we go. You know. She says that at some 1651 01:36:24.279 --> 01:36:28.640 point Adam called her and said he wanted to come up, 1652 01:36:28.680 --> 01:36:30.239 and if he came up, he wasn't leaving. There was 1653 01:36:30.279 --> 01:36:33.039 like some sexual attention between them, and when he came 1654 01:36:33.119 --> 01:36:35.039 to her house and rang the bell, she didn't answer, 1655 01:36:35.600 --> 01:36:37.479 Like she was like, I don't know. He had a 1656 01:36:37.479 --> 01:36:39.439 girlfriend at the time, and then like a month later 1657 01:36:39.560 --> 01:36:41.560 he was like, I'm marrying her. I'm not good with 1658 01:36:41.600 --> 01:36:44.279 my girl. Away from my girl, yadayada, YadA, And then 1659 01:36:44.279 --> 01:36:46.359 they really avoided each other for a long time. The 1660 01:36:47.199 --> 01:36:49.199 last time they had a real good talk was at 1661 01:36:49.199 --> 01:36:53.199 the end of Girls, where she was like, if I'm 1662 01:36:53.239 --> 01:36:55.800 not what I need to be or I'm sorry for 1663 01:36:55.840 --> 01:36:57.960 any situation, he was like, it was just as they 1664 01:36:57.960 --> 01:37:00.880 should be. You know, two weird talking to each other 1665 01:37:00.960 --> 01:37:07.239 to Artsy. You know, I call this the the uh. 1666 01:37:08.560 --> 01:37:12.039 I was gonna say, Judy Bloom, Judy funny Doug Funny 1667 01:37:12.279 --> 01:37:15.840 from Doug's sister. You know, she's got a bereton and 1668 01:37:16.000 --> 01:37:20.720 sunglasses and everything's art and everything's too cool, and she's 1669 01:37:20.840 --> 01:37:25.039 just like, like life is art, right, And so that's 1670 01:37:25.039 --> 01:37:29.119 how they talk to each other. That's how her and 1671 01:37:29.159 --> 01:37:30.800 Adam talk to each other. But a lot of people 1672 01:37:30.840 --> 01:37:33.319 are like, I don't want to hear Adam's side. I 1673 01:37:33.359 --> 01:37:36.039 don't know. I like y'all act like people won't fuck 1674 01:37:36.119 --> 01:37:39.439 Lena like they will as Evan is by this fucking book. 1675 01:37:42.720 --> 01:37:48.119 So I'm gonna talk about the sickness stuff and then 1676 01:37:48.119 --> 01:37:49.800 I'll talk about the work stuff and then we'll be done. 1677 01:37:50.920 --> 01:37:55.640 So Lena, through a lot of this book is about, 1678 01:37:55.840 --> 01:38:00.159 especially the second half is about her sickness journey. She 1679 01:38:00.199 --> 01:38:05.880 started off with having indo indometriosis, super painful. She was 1680 01:38:05.880 --> 01:38:11.520 having she was having uh ovarian cysts. She had a 1681 01:38:11.640 --> 01:38:15.640 very large one, and a doctor that the work made 1682 01:38:15.680 --> 01:38:19.439 her go to to examine her popped it while she 1683 01:38:19.800 --> 01:38:24.800 while they were examining her. And during this time, like 1684 01:38:25.159 --> 01:38:26.760 I mean, she would just go to doctor over and 1685 01:38:26.760 --> 01:38:28.159 over again, and a lot of people didn't know what 1686 01:38:28.199 --> 01:38:30.600 was going on, and so when they she was she 1687 01:38:31.039 --> 01:38:34.960 sent to the hospital because of that popped overian cyst 1688 01:38:35.039 --> 01:38:40.600 and like she couldn't work and the HBO's insurance wouldn't 1689 01:38:40.600 --> 01:38:45.800 pay for the delays in in in production unless they 1690 01:38:45.880 --> 01:38:47.520 went to this other doctor. And this other doctor was 1691 01:38:47.600 --> 01:38:51.319 rough and mean stuff. At this point, she is having 1692 01:38:51.439 --> 01:38:56.079 like flashbacks to her rape. She's being flashed back to 1693 01:38:56.079 --> 01:39:00.840 her molestation as a child. She is like high on shit, 1694 01:39:01.279 --> 01:39:06.840 and because they're giving her a delauded whatever that is, 1695 01:39:07.119 --> 01:39:10.760 it's real. It's heroin, but apparently it's like medical grade heroin, 1696 01:39:11.159 --> 01:39:16.000 and like she's just in this journey like every time 1697 01:39:16.039 --> 01:39:17.840 she goes to the doctor there like this is what's wrong. 1698 01:39:17.880 --> 01:39:19.840 That's not what's wrong. This is what's wrong. That's not 1699 01:39:19.880 --> 01:39:23.079 what's wrong. And so she gets the hysterectomy. She didn't. 1700 01:39:23.119 --> 01:39:27.600 She realizes she has the Els Dinners. Let me actually 1701 01:39:27.600 --> 01:39:29.479 look this up. It's EDS, but let me look this 1702 01:39:29.600 --> 01:39:37.239 up Elos dan los Ler's Dan Loos system, and it's 1703 01:39:37.720 --> 01:39:42.560 it's a group of thirteen heritable connective tissue disorders caused 1704 01:39:42.560 --> 01:39:46.319 by genetic mutations affecting collagen. So that's why it's like 1705 01:39:46.359 --> 01:39:50.880 the joints and the connective tissues. It leads to hypermobility, 1706 01:39:50.960 --> 01:39:55.479 so double joint stretchy skin and tissue fragility, and like 1707 01:39:56.199 --> 01:39:59.399 it's a whole fucking road eve oddly from RuPaul's drag 1708 01:39:59.520 --> 01:40:02.479 Race or the drag Queen ev Oddly. I don't want 1709 01:40:02.520 --> 01:40:04.520 to say she's from there. She was live drag queen 1710 01:40:04.520 --> 01:40:07.279 before there, and she's a drag queen after. Has this 1711 01:40:07.479 --> 01:40:12.680 like it it can there is no cure for it, 1712 01:40:13.800 --> 01:40:16.520 and it can be extremely painful. It can flare. It 1713 01:40:16.520 --> 01:40:20.119 cannot like finding out that they'd be finding out like 1714 01:40:20.159 --> 01:40:22.880 she had MS. Guys. I know a lot of people 1715 01:40:22.880 --> 01:40:25.640 aren't familiar with DS, and I'm not that familiar. I 1716 01:40:25.680 --> 01:40:27.760 just know it's super serious. But like I want you 1717 01:40:27.840 --> 01:40:31.600 to imagine she got diagnosed with a MESS and that's 1718 01:40:31.640 --> 01:40:35.319 the level of gravity it is. And then they're putting 1719 01:40:35.359 --> 01:40:41.600 her on more and more pills. She's just like always 1720 01:40:41.680 --> 01:40:44.119 going through it. She set herself on fire at some point, 1721 01:40:44.159 --> 01:40:47.039 that's another thing about her exhausting with I think it 1722 01:40:47.079 --> 01:40:50.359 was a candle. She set her titty and like half 1723 01:40:50.359 --> 01:40:53.319 her chest on fire, and like had to get skin 1724 01:40:53.479 --> 01:40:58.239 grafts and not like like how did that happen? Always 1725 01:40:58.640 --> 01:41:00.479 then at some point she gets she had adopts a 1726 01:41:00.600 --> 01:41:04.119 like a an old, patchy haired dog and just takes 1727 01:41:04.159 --> 01:41:09.000 it everywhere with her. I will say this, I don't 1728 01:41:09.000 --> 01:41:12.079 have a lot to talk about with the illness stuff, 1729 01:41:13.119 --> 01:41:16.760 but I do think that was incredibly compelling read. And 1730 01:41:17.199 --> 01:41:20.760 when I say she's exhausting, I don't just mean to 1731 01:41:20.760 --> 01:41:23.079 the people around her. I think she's exhausted too. And 1732 01:41:23.079 --> 01:41:24.680 that's why I was like explaining to he where early 1733 01:41:24.680 --> 01:41:27.640 twenties were like, because I too was tired, and I 1734 01:41:27.800 --> 01:41:30.600 also everybody around me was tired too. And if I 1735 01:41:30.640 --> 01:41:32.720 could have stopped it, I would have, but I couldn't. 1736 01:41:32.720 --> 01:41:38.279 I couldn't do it. How did I stop it? I 1737 01:41:38.399 --> 01:41:42.520 kind of just you know, I had several suicide attempts. 1738 01:41:42.640 --> 01:41:47.680 I that's when depression really fucking got me. Depression got 1739 01:41:47.720 --> 01:41:50.000 its clausing me as soon as I left my home, 1740 01:41:50.119 --> 01:41:57.439 my parents' home. Like I guess, I don't, I guys, 1741 01:41:57.479 --> 01:42:00.920 I don't know how I did start really not focusing 1742 01:42:01.000 --> 01:42:03.600 on myself. I started focusing on the things I could 1743 01:42:03.600 --> 01:42:05.600 do for other people, and I'm like volunteering a lot. 1744 01:42:05.640 --> 01:42:07.560 That's where I got the voluntarism I really believe in 1745 01:42:07.640 --> 01:42:16.720 from I didn't have a lot of relationships. Okay, after 1746 01:42:16.960 --> 01:42:19.520 I got into that relationship with the guy and then 1747 01:42:19.760 --> 01:42:21.960 he's the only ones ever broken up in my entire life. 1748 01:42:23.199 --> 01:42:26.960 He broke up with me and then two days two 1749 01:42:27.000 --> 01:42:30.439 days later, got arrested for murder. That was the last wild, 1750 01:42:30.479 --> 01:42:33.319 wild wild relationship I was in. I kind of was like, eh, 1751 01:42:33.560 --> 01:42:35.720 I think I should stopped getting in relationships. And I did, 1752 01:42:36.359 --> 01:42:40.880 and like, I started focusing on other people, and I 1753 01:42:40.920 --> 01:42:44.960 started growing up financially, started making more money, and then 1754 01:42:45.000 --> 01:42:47.399 also being like, oh I could do something, I could 1755 01:42:47.479 --> 01:42:54.520 be something. And slowly but surely I started to get 1756 01:42:54.560 --> 01:42:57.760 out of the cyclone. I don't like, there wasn't one 1757 01:42:57.840 --> 01:43:00.239 thing I didn't like, take a magical pill on the 1758 01:43:00.279 --> 01:43:03.720 cyclone went away. I like I was riding that bitch. 1759 01:43:03.760 --> 01:43:06.680 I was Dorothy up in here. So but it just 1760 01:43:07.279 --> 01:43:09.920 I just my parents are like, you grew up, and 1761 01:43:09.960 --> 01:43:13.359 I'm like, I don't know if that's true. I think 1762 01:43:14.560 --> 01:43:17.159 just over time, well maybe I did grow up, but 1763 01:43:17.279 --> 01:43:20.760 just over time, like I just got further in from 1764 01:43:20.880 --> 01:43:24.119 I'm not saying crazy shit didn't happen anymore. I'm just 1765 01:43:24.159 --> 01:43:27.960 saying it wasn't my everyday life. You didn't every time 1766 01:43:28.000 --> 01:43:31.399 you called me, I'd be like, where am I. I'm 1767 01:43:31.439 --> 01:43:33.159 in the room with this guy that I just met 1768 01:43:33.199 --> 01:43:39.079 on Black Planet and blah blahlah. That wasn't my thing anymore. Uh. 1769 01:43:39.840 --> 01:43:44.439 And I was celibate for like maybe eight months or so. 1770 01:43:44.800 --> 01:43:49.520 That really changed things. Did I have a sex edition No, 1771 01:43:49.760 --> 01:43:53.399 I didn't. I just was I did not have an 1772 01:43:53.399 --> 01:43:58.720 addiction to sex. I just was acting out through it. 1773 01:43:58.760 --> 01:44:01.920 And I also did not value it. It just it 1774 01:44:02.079 --> 01:44:04.720 just was a thing I wasn't like, you know how, 1775 01:44:04.840 --> 01:44:09.279 Like in that movie Vanilla Sky where where Tom Cruise 1776 01:44:10.920 --> 01:44:13.760 Cameron Diaz has got Tom Cruise in the car and 1777 01:44:13.840 --> 01:44:16.359 I guess he slept with her and hasn't isn't like 1778 01:44:16.439 --> 01:44:19.239 being nice to her, I don't know, ghosted her and 1779 01:44:19.279 --> 01:44:21.199 she's like about to crash the car and like I 1780 01:44:21.239 --> 01:44:25.119 think killed herself and like disfigure him, and she's like, 1781 01:44:25.560 --> 01:44:29.079 sex is a promise your body makes. Like that never 1782 01:44:29.279 --> 01:44:31.239 was me. I was just like it is or it isn't. 1783 01:44:32.359 --> 01:44:35.159 But being celibate for about eight months really changed everything 1784 01:44:35.159 --> 01:44:39.560 because I was like from a relationship to a relationship relationship, like, oh, 1785 01:44:39.640 --> 01:44:42.479 this girl's gonna bust out my windows nicely, wither are 1786 01:44:42.479 --> 01:44:48.079 one more charm and then and on to another one 1787 01:44:48.600 --> 01:44:53.319 like that, But I want to be clear, like her 1788 01:44:53.520 --> 01:44:57.039 chronic illnesses, Like if you were from the outside, you'd 1789 01:44:57.039 --> 01:45:00.039 be like, why are you always sick? Why is it 1790 01:45:00.199 --> 01:45:03.479 always something? Why are you always breaking your elbow? Why 1791 01:45:03.479 --> 01:45:05.760 are you always like and now you're in rehab? Like 1792 01:45:07.279 --> 01:45:10.960 it was a lot, and I'm as much as it 1793 01:45:11.000 --> 01:45:12.680 was a lot for the people around her, it's it 1794 01:45:12.680 --> 01:45:15.760 was a lot for Lena too, Like being chronically ill 1795 01:45:15.960 --> 01:45:19.119 is not easy. And again, a lot of people think 1796 01:45:19.119 --> 01:45:22.560 you're lying because every time they see you something's going on. 1797 01:45:22.760 --> 01:45:24.680 I don't believe Lena was lying. I know some people 1798 01:45:24.680 --> 01:45:27.199 think she's like the biggest liar in the world. I 1799 01:45:27.199 --> 01:45:32.000 don't think so. I think she's met storytellers sometimes. So 1800 01:45:32.359 --> 01:45:34.960 one of the before she got her uterus taken one 1801 01:45:35.000 --> 01:45:38.720 of the taken before she agreed to have a hysterectomy 1802 01:45:38.840 --> 01:45:41.199 and then got the doctors to give her one because 1803 01:45:41.199 --> 01:45:49.479 they wouldn't give it to her. They they said one 1804 01:45:49.479 --> 01:45:52.279 of the cures for endometriosis is to have a baby, 1805 01:45:53.039 --> 01:45:56.359 And I was like what, And She's like that seem 1806 01:45:56.359 --> 01:45:58.439 as good as reasons as anything. That's a good reason 1807 01:45:58.479 --> 01:46:01.399 to have a baby. Y'all need to do more intentional 1808 01:46:01.520 --> 01:46:06.600 my friends. So she started harvesting eggs so that she 1809 01:46:06.680 --> 01:46:10.119 could possibly like freeze them and then have them do IVF, 1810 01:46:10.600 --> 01:46:14.439 not freeze them, do IVF, And right fully, everybody around 1811 01:46:14.479 --> 01:46:17.560 her was like, what the fuck, Like you can't even 1812 01:46:17.600 --> 01:46:19.720 take care of yourself, You can't even get out of bed, 1813 01:46:19.800 --> 01:46:25.880 you can't even But she's like, yeah, I gotta do this. 1814 01:46:26.039 --> 01:46:28.920 Being a mother is super important to me. And I 1815 01:46:29.039 --> 01:46:31.880 was like, that is so wild, And Lena would say 1816 01:46:31.920 --> 01:46:34.239 that that's not Like. If someone told me that Lena 1817 01:46:34.359 --> 01:46:37.359 Dunham was around here saying that being a mother was 1818 01:46:37.680 --> 01:46:40.239 the most important thing she could do, I would be shocked. 1819 01:46:42.159 --> 01:46:44.520 I would think it was Ai. I would think it 1820 01:46:44.520 --> 01:46:49.560 was AI. And I don't understand. You know, all my 1821 01:46:49.640 --> 01:46:54.479 kids are adopted. I don't necessarily think adoption. Some of 1822 01:46:54.520 --> 01:46:57.399 the ways adoptions are handled are very ethical. But if 1823 01:46:57.439 --> 01:46:59.239 she really really wanted to fucking baby, she can get 1824 01:46:59.239 --> 01:47:01.439 a surrogate. If she really wanted, she could an egg donate. 1825 01:47:01.479 --> 01:47:04.960 She's rich, she's rich at this point, she could really 1826 01:47:05.039 --> 01:47:12.359 she could get a surrogate. She could adopt shed. She 1827 01:47:12.479 --> 01:47:14.560 is the exact person who would be like adopting a 1828 01:47:14.560 --> 01:47:16.720 baby from China, you know what I mean. Like, there's 1829 01:47:16.800 --> 01:47:20.199 all kinds of things that could be happening and I'm 1830 01:47:20.279 --> 01:47:22.560 not and but none of those things should be happening 1831 01:47:22.560 --> 01:47:25.199 at the moment she's trying to do this IVF obviously, 1832 01:47:25.239 --> 01:47:27.960 like most of the eggs didn't take, and most of 1833 01:47:27.960 --> 01:47:30.079 the eggs were not viable, and the one that was 1834 01:47:30.159 --> 01:47:34.359 had a genetic disorder that had genetic abnormalities that they 1835 01:47:34.359 --> 01:47:37.960 were like, we don't feel comfortable I and so like 1836 01:47:38.039 --> 01:47:40.359 it was like on a weekend, on like the fourth 1837 01:47:40.359 --> 01:47:42.279 of July, the doctor called her and told her that, 1838 01:47:42.319 --> 01:47:45.039 and that really crushed her dream. She doesn't have kids now. 1839 01:47:45.239 --> 01:47:47.560 I'm not sure if she still feels the same way, 1840 01:47:48.279 --> 01:47:52.399 but I would be interested in her her telling us this. Yeah, 1841 01:47:52.479 --> 01:47:54.479 I think the most compelling part of this memoir is 1842 01:47:54.479 --> 01:47:56.399 the illness stuff. It's hard for me to describe it 1843 01:47:56.439 --> 01:48:02.159 to you. It is ongoing, and I think that a 1844 01:48:02.159 --> 01:48:06.640 lot of people would feel a lot of empathy for 1845 01:48:06.680 --> 01:48:10.439 her in that moment and those many moments. Not the 1846 01:48:10.439 --> 01:48:14.880 part but she let her titty on fire. Another part. 1847 01:48:15.119 --> 01:48:16.680 All right, let's talk about work stuff, and let's get 1848 01:48:16.680 --> 01:48:19.840 the fuck out of here. So one thing to note 1849 01:48:19.920 --> 01:48:23.119 about Lena is that she was impossibly young when she 1850 01:48:23.159 --> 01:48:28.479 got girls. She was like twenty three when she made 1851 01:48:28.560 --> 01:48:34.560 Tiny Furniture. They she won at south By Southwest and 1852 01:48:34.600 --> 01:48:37.319 a month later she had a show. A month later 1853 01:48:37.359 --> 01:48:43.359 she already had a show. They had they had hooked 1854 01:48:43.399 --> 01:48:45.960 her up. They were like, you gotta like, she can't 1855 01:48:46.039 --> 01:48:50.039 run the show. So the like jug Apatow, Apatow was 1856 01:48:50.119 --> 01:48:55.119 like really mentoring her. She was able. She was like 1857 01:48:55.159 --> 01:49:00.439 going on the set of Bridesmaids and like they really 1858 01:49:00.479 --> 01:49:03.760 felt like connected in their comedy, which I think their 1859 01:49:03.800 --> 01:49:08.399 comedy does, like go together. She hooked up with her partner, Jenny, 1860 01:49:08.479 --> 01:49:11.479 because the studio gave her a list of people to 1861 01:49:12.199 --> 01:49:15.159 she needs to run this show with her, and she 1862 01:49:15.239 --> 01:49:17.560 hooked up with Jenny. Jenny's about twenty years older than her. 1863 01:49:17.720 --> 01:49:21.079 She's a vet in the industry, two kids, divorced, partner. 1864 01:49:21.279 --> 01:49:23.880 She's like a grown up, grown up and Lena refers 1865 01:49:23.880 --> 01:49:26.119 to her as a grown up the entire time. Okay, 1866 01:49:26.920 --> 01:49:29.359 there is a powerodynamic between the two of them that 1867 01:49:29.640 --> 01:49:32.600 is shifty, and I don't I wonder why people are 1868 01:49:32.600 --> 01:49:36.560 not talking about this. They are quote unquote best friends 1869 01:49:36.640 --> 01:49:39.159 and partners. I don't know that they were best I 1870 01:49:39.199 --> 01:49:41.880 think she was Lena's best friend. I don't know if 1871 01:49:41.920 --> 01:49:44.560 Lena was her best friend. But I don't blame this 1872 01:49:44.640 --> 01:49:47.520 all on Lena, because because Jenny would talk to her 1873 01:49:47.600 --> 01:49:49.840 like that, they spent so much time together. They would 1874 01:49:49.880 --> 01:49:52.720 lay in bed together, they were enmeshed in a way 1875 01:49:52.760 --> 01:49:54.760 that she kind of was with her parents. And like 1876 01:49:54.800 --> 01:49:56.560 I said, the two great loves of her life were 1877 01:49:56.760 --> 01:50:05.520 Jack and Jenny. I wanna say this, she never she 1878 01:50:05.600 --> 01:50:09.720 had not teachers of playing Hannah, and I wonder if 1879 01:50:09.760 --> 01:50:13.079 she realizes that if she'd stayed behind the scenes, if 1880 01:50:13.119 --> 01:50:17.960 she was not playing Hannah, that Hannah, that she much 1881 01:50:18.039 --> 01:50:19.720 of what happened to her would have never happened to 1882 01:50:19.760 --> 01:50:22.680 her because she would not have been a recognizable person. Uh, 1883 01:50:22.760 --> 01:50:28.720 she would not have been the face of girls, right, 1884 01:50:29.119 --> 01:50:31.439 because maybe that character would be the face of girls, 1885 01:50:31.479 --> 01:50:34.600 but she wouldn't be like she'd be doing interviews and 1886 01:50:34.760 --> 01:50:36.960 people would she people would have to be like, well, 1887 01:50:37.000 --> 01:50:40.880 this is Lena Dunham, right, it's so interesting. But they 1888 01:50:41.000 --> 01:50:44.399 convinced her to play Hannah, and at the time she 1889 01:50:44.439 --> 01:50:47.319 was skinny, a little skinnier, and it's mostly cause all 1890 01:50:47.319 --> 01:50:48.840 the stuff she was going through, and also she was 1891 01:50:48.840 --> 01:50:53.279 in La and everybody's skinny, Okay, you just it is 1892 01:50:53.319 --> 01:50:55.960 what it is. And the network was like, this is 1893 01:50:56.000 --> 01:50:59.359 not funny because Hannah isn't f Hannah's meant to be ugly. 1894 01:51:00.119 --> 01:51:02.159 She's meant to be unfuckable, and she can't be that 1895 01:51:02.199 --> 01:51:04.439 if she's skinny, because skinny, to a lot of people 1896 01:51:04.479 --> 01:51:07.680 means beautiful. She can't be funny if she's skinny either, 1897 01:51:08.039 --> 01:51:10.439 She's gonna have to be a little fat to be funny. Like, 1898 01:51:12.119 --> 01:51:15.159 you know, the last the last skinny funny person woman 1899 01:51:15.239 --> 01:51:20.920 we allowed was the Nanny. Okay, like that's the last time. 1900 01:51:23.760 --> 01:51:27.720 So the network wants her to eat and she's like, 1901 01:51:27.760 --> 01:51:31.199 I can't do Like, I just I can't just stuff myself. 1902 01:51:31.239 --> 01:51:33.920 I can't do that. And Genny is like that, she 1903 01:51:33.960 --> 01:51:35.960 says it's the first time that she was like, Oh, 1904 01:51:36.039 --> 01:51:39.760 the show comes for anything else. Jenny was like, just eat, 1905 01:51:40.159 --> 01:51:42.479 put it the food in your fucking mouth, because one, 1906 01:51:43.319 --> 01:51:47.039 this show is a dream for Jenny too. Two like 1907 01:51:47.119 --> 01:51:50.359 she would be saying things like, oh, you can't do that, 1908 01:51:50.359 --> 01:51:53.439 and my kids aren't gonna eat or uh, you're gonna 1909 01:51:53.479 --> 01:51:56.159 lose where you're gonna ruin the show and then we'll 1910 01:51:56.159 --> 01:51:58.439 both be out of a job. Stuff like that. And 1911 01:51:58.880 --> 01:52:01.680 that's what I mean about these power dynamic being off 1912 01:52:01.760 --> 01:52:04.119 in that she could be manipulative with Lena, and Lena 1913 01:52:04.159 --> 01:52:09.600 is naive as shit, Like later when Lena when they're 1914 01:52:09.600 --> 01:52:15.199 done with Girls and they're starting production company and they're 1915 01:52:15.239 --> 01:52:19.359 doing like, like, Lena didn't get a lot of money 1916 01:52:19.359 --> 01:52:21.399 for the first four seasons her book came out. After that, 1917 01:52:21.880 --> 01:52:23.439 she got a lot of money for the book, and 1918 01:52:23.479 --> 01:52:25.600 then she got a shit to of money on her 1919 01:52:25.600 --> 01:52:28.520 contract after that, and like she talks about being rich 1920 01:52:28.560 --> 01:52:30.560 and what that means and how there's a lot of 1921 01:52:30.680 --> 01:52:32.399 guilt in it, and her father would tell her, you've 1922 01:52:32.399 --> 01:52:34.039 been guilty as you're five years old, what the fuck 1923 01:52:34.039 --> 01:52:38.000 are you feeling guilty about. She would buy dinners and 1924 01:52:38.039 --> 01:52:42.479 spend money, and she was overcharged and underserved everywhere. She 1925 01:52:42.560 --> 01:52:47.079 was paying for her grandma's apartments towards the end, and 1926 01:52:47.159 --> 01:52:49.000 Jack was like, you are not a rapper. You cannot 1927 01:52:49.000 --> 01:52:52.399 spend money like this. But she felt guilty for the money, 1928 01:52:52.439 --> 01:52:56.439 so she kept trying to give it away. People who 1929 01:52:56.479 --> 01:52:59.920 knew her before she got famous would sell stories of 1930 01:53:00.239 --> 01:53:03.039 her write stories about her like they were trying to 1931 01:53:03.039 --> 01:53:05.279 get their writing creds up and will write stories about her, 1932 01:53:05.720 --> 01:53:07.439 like people she thought were friends would be like, I 1933 01:53:07.479 --> 01:53:11.479 had dinner with Lena Dunnam and she wasn't that interesting, 1934 01:53:11.560 --> 01:53:16.399 like stuff like that. Family members with the man she 1935 01:53:16.600 --> 01:53:19.199 be places, especially her mom and dad. Her mom and 1936 01:53:19.319 --> 01:53:21.640 dad were just like, we'll give a fuck, We don't 1937 01:53:21.640 --> 01:53:23.520 give a fuck. You still gotta do this. She still 1938 01:53:23.560 --> 01:53:25.720 better come to this cousin's funeral, that sort of stuff. 1939 01:53:27.680 --> 01:53:31.560 She uh, they would demand money from her, she just 1940 01:53:31.600 --> 01:53:34.359 would do it. Not necessarily mom and parents with the money, 1941 01:53:34.640 --> 01:53:39.279 but she would just do it. And she talks about 1942 01:53:39.359 --> 01:53:41.720 how being famous kind of fucks you up a little bit, 1943 01:53:42.359 --> 01:53:44.119 and in the beginning how she wanted to go to 1944 01:53:44.159 --> 01:53:47.239 every red carpet everything she was, She wanted to go 1945 01:53:47.239 --> 01:53:49.600 on every talk show. She wanted to be like, thank 1946 01:53:49.640 --> 01:53:52.039 you for having Like she just wanted to be everywhere. 1947 01:53:52.359 --> 01:53:59.840 She the being famous gave her fucking dopamine hits that 1948 01:53:59.880 --> 01:54:01.319 you would get if you were doing cracks like it 1949 01:54:01.560 --> 01:54:06.640 just it changes everything. But when they go back to 1950 01:54:06.640 --> 01:54:13.119 do their negotiation, Genny wants to know what Lena got 1951 01:54:13.279 --> 01:54:15.159 and she didn't know when they started with Lena Gott 1952 01:54:15.159 --> 01:54:17.840 and she didn't know what the renegotiation, what they got, 1953 01:54:18.000 --> 01:54:21.399 but she demanded to know now. And when she told her, 1954 01:54:21.399 --> 01:54:23.520 she's like, it didn't even occur to me not to 1955 01:54:23.520 --> 01:54:29.359 tell her. Because she's a very naive person and because 1956 01:54:29.399 --> 01:54:32.520 she is centered on herself, she does not she can't 1957 01:54:32.560 --> 01:54:36.039 read social situations. Genny tells her Jenny's quote was much lower. 1958 01:54:36.600 --> 01:54:39.119 Jenny tells her that they need to negotiate and that 1959 01:54:39.239 --> 01:54:42.039 they will negotiate as a team. They will get paid 1960 01:54:42.039 --> 01:54:48.199 the same amount, and Lena agrees. And I'm just like Lena, 1961 01:54:48.399 --> 01:54:51.920 you are when every scandal hits, You're the face of it. 1962 01:54:52.239 --> 01:54:55.119 You're the face of girls. You're on screen with your 1963 01:54:55.159 --> 01:54:58.920 tits out, you get. You are the lightning rod for everything, 1964 01:55:00.039 --> 01:55:03.359 and a lot of it. You wrote, especially in the beginning, 1965 01:55:03.359 --> 01:55:06.239 you wrote by yourself. But I'm not saying Genny did not. 1966 01:55:07.000 --> 01:55:09.880 Jenny obviously is an important part too. Jenny was holding 1967 01:55:09.920 --> 01:55:12.680 shit down when you were sick and when all like 1968 01:55:12.760 --> 01:55:14.399 you know, when you gotta go to rehab, you gotta 1969 01:55:14.439 --> 01:55:17.239 do this. We got. Genny was holding shit down, right, 1970 01:55:17.880 --> 01:55:20.640 And I understand how she would be frustrated with you. 1971 01:55:20.840 --> 01:55:23.760 And again, if you weren't the main if you weren't 1972 01:55:23.760 --> 01:55:28.399 the main character on the fucking show, they could move 1973 01:55:28.439 --> 01:55:30.600 forward production without you. You can write from a fucking 1974 01:55:30.640 --> 01:55:33.159 hospital bed like a lot of the shit wouldn't have 1975 01:55:33.199 --> 01:55:35.640 happened if you weren't the talent. But you are the talent. 1976 01:55:37.279 --> 01:55:39.399 And so maybe Jenny doesn't get paid same around with you, 1977 01:55:39.600 --> 01:55:41.119 is you? I mean, it'd be nice if she did, 1978 01:55:41.199 --> 01:55:44.880 but maybe she doesn't. You. She doesn't have a best 1979 01:55:44.880 --> 01:55:50.000 selling book where she is admitting to being sexually inappropriate 1980 01:55:50.039 --> 01:55:54.560 with her with her brother at the time, who had 1981 01:55:54.600 --> 01:56:00.000 a vagina. Yeah, she didn't have She didn't have those things. 1982 01:56:00.119 --> 01:56:02.319 And that's why the quote was fucking different, because they 1983 01:56:02.359 --> 01:56:06.760 could have got another showrunner with you, but they couldn't 1984 01:56:06.760 --> 01:56:12.279 have replaced you. That's why anyway, But she doesn't. Lena 1985 01:56:12.359 --> 01:56:15.159 talks to no one about this except for her agents. 1986 01:56:15.239 --> 01:56:17.199 She didn't ask Judd about it. She didn't at this 1987 01:56:17.239 --> 01:56:19.560 point she had met so many famous people, been involved 1988 01:56:19.640 --> 01:56:21.319 so many fames. She didn't talk to Jack about it. 1989 01:56:21.359 --> 01:56:24.640 She didn't talk to anybody about it and just did it. 1990 01:56:24.640 --> 01:56:27.159 And her agents, she said six agents got on the 1991 01:56:27.159 --> 01:56:30.119 phone with her and was and were like, Hey, you 1992 01:56:30.159 --> 01:56:35.800 can't do this. You can't do this. It's it's one 1993 01:56:35.800 --> 01:56:38.439 of the most foolish things you could ever do. And 1994 01:56:38.920 --> 01:56:43.560 keep in mind that if you do it, you will 1995 01:56:43.600 --> 01:56:46.000 not get more money. What will happen is they'll take 1996 01:56:46.039 --> 01:56:47.800 more money from you and give it to Jenny to 1997 01:56:47.800 --> 01:56:51.760 make an equal This is not you will lose in this, 1998 01:56:51.880 --> 01:56:54.439 and she just was like, no, no, I have to 1999 01:56:54.720 --> 01:56:57.279 Jenny's my best friend. I can't do anything about Jenny. 2000 01:56:57.319 --> 01:56:59.279 This only happened with Jenny. And I'm like, is Jenny 2001 01:56:59.319 --> 01:57:03.359 your best friend because I don't know. You're like, a 2002 01:57:03.359 --> 01:57:04.920 best friend would do this, and I'm like, a best 2003 01:57:04.920 --> 01:57:07.760 friend wouldn't ask me to do this. I might have 2004 01:57:07.840 --> 01:57:10.920 been transparent with the pay. It just depends. I've been 2005 01:57:10.960 --> 01:57:13.760 transparent with pay. I think that helps other people figure 2006 01:57:13.760 --> 01:57:17.560 out what they need to argue for, but not with everybody. 2007 01:57:17.600 --> 01:57:19.560 I'm transparent with people who need to know, people who 2008 01:57:19.800 --> 01:57:23.119 I feel confident talking to about it, and people that 2009 01:57:23.279 --> 01:57:25.119 it will be relevant to. I don't need to just 2010 01:57:25.159 --> 01:57:29.000 tell people everybody what I make you know, and I 2011 01:57:29.039 --> 01:57:30.960 do think it would be relevant to Ginny. So I 2012 01:57:30.960 --> 01:57:33.000 I might have been transparent, but I would not do. 2013 01:57:33.159 --> 01:57:37.319 I would be like, n No, I don't think that's appropriate. 2014 01:57:38.399 --> 01:57:40.079 Or if it was hard for me to say that, 2015 01:57:40.079 --> 01:57:41.560 I would say, let me talk to my agency what 2016 01:57:41.600 --> 01:57:46.359 they say, and then I would say, oh, my agent 2017 01:57:46.399 --> 01:57:50.079 say I can't do that. They say I can't My 2018 01:57:50.079 --> 01:57:52.840 manager says I can't do that, Like that's that w 2019 01:57:53.000 --> 01:57:56.039 that's not how it's done. And and and that they 2020 01:57:56.039 --> 01:57:58.119 will drop me if I keep doing that. That's what 2021 01:57:58.119 --> 01:58:00.640 I would say. My agent told me, My agents told 2022 01:58:00.640 --> 01:58:02.319 me they will drop me if I try to do that, 2023 01:58:03.439 --> 01:58:06.960 because it's just not what people do. And I believe that. 2024 01:58:07.119 --> 01:58:08.600 I mean, I don't believe everything and agent says, but 2025 01:58:08.640 --> 01:58:10.479 I believe that. I believe she talked to Judge. He 2026 01:58:10.520 --> 01:58:15.479 would have said, oh, that's tough, that's real tough. But no, 2027 01:58:15.680 --> 01:58:20.760 don't do that. But she did it. And yeah, I 2028 01:58:20.800 --> 01:58:26.880 also want to talk about the rape controversy. Lena does this. 2029 01:58:26.920 --> 01:58:30.840 It's very vague about this, and Liz says that she 2030 01:58:31.079 --> 01:58:36.479 has made amends to this person and that has made 2031 01:58:36.479 --> 01:58:39.760 amends to the family and has been even been working 2032 01:58:39.800 --> 01:58:41.560 with them afterwards. So I didn't know that at all, 2033 01:58:41.560 --> 01:58:43.920 because again I don't following have done them She's made 2034 01:58:43.920 --> 01:58:51.079 public apologies, She's made private apologies and amens. But Aurora, 2035 01:58:51.720 --> 01:58:59.439 paragu paragu. She's the guy, the black guy in Romeo 2036 01:58:59.479 --> 01:59:05.439 and Juliet, right with Clare Danes and Leo. That's who 2037 01:59:05.479 --> 01:59:08.720 he is. He was in OZ again. Guy's if I 2038 01:59:08.760 --> 01:59:11.319 ever started rewatching OZ. You gotta come. You gotta call 2039 01:59:11.399 --> 01:59:15.920 nine one one. You have to. I'm having I met 2040 01:59:15.920 --> 01:59:18.399 my rock bottom. I need a safety check. It's what 2041 01:59:18.439 --> 01:59:24.680 I mean. He was in loss like he lost. Excuse me. 2042 01:59:25.119 --> 01:59:28.399 He he's a like is his name Harold, I don't know, 2043 01:59:28.600 --> 01:59:33.199 but he was in he's like a like a veteran actor. Okay. 2044 01:59:33.359 --> 01:59:39.239 She described being sexually assaulted by a member of the 2045 01:59:39.279 --> 01:59:41.760 Girl's writing room, a man that was on. I don't 2046 01:59:41.760 --> 01:59:43.840 know his name either. I don't need to know his 2047 01:59:43.920 --> 01:59:45.960 name for this. I don't know many of their names 2048 01:59:45.960 --> 01:59:48.960 for this. She went to the police station. She filed 2049 01:59:48.960 --> 01:59:55.239 a report. Lena has just finished her hysterectomy. She's just 2050 01:59:55.680 --> 01:59:58.239 she says, based she doesn't even remember this. She says, 2051 01:59:58.319 --> 02:00:04.199 based on the dates that are online of when the 2052 02:00:04.239 --> 02:00:07.439 statement came out, she had just gotten home with her hysterectomy. 2053 02:00:07.600 --> 02:00:11.319 She was laid the fuck out on medical grade heroine. 2054 02:00:11.720 --> 02:00:17.800 She also had a kalanapin dependency. She is taking so 2055 02:00:17.960 --> 02:00:21.760 many pills, so many pills, and not in like, uh, 2056 02:00:21.840 --> 02:00:24.000 I'm gonna snort these pills to feel better away, but 2057 02:00:24.079 --> 02:00:27.640 like she she's just like, yeah, I have to take 2058 02:00:28.199 --> 02:00:31.319 a shit little kalanapin. My doctor told me to do it. 2059 02:00:32.079 --> 02:00:37.760 What do you mean I have to like take these 2060 02:00:38.159 --> 02:00:40.840 very very powerful pain meds. My doctor told me to 2061 02:00:40.840 --> 02:00:43.960 do it. It wasn't like she wasn't sick, but she was 2062 02:00:44.039 --> 02:00:47.199 just out of it. And she says, So what happened 2063 02:00:47.239 --> 02:00:51.039 is Jenny and Lena put out a statement that said, 2064 02:00:51.079 --> 02:00:56.079 do some insight information. They believe they believe sexual assault survivors, 2065 02:00:56.119 --> 02:00:58.159 but they they believe this is one of the three 2066 02:00:58.199 --> 02:01:03.880 percent that falsely accused her falsely if she they believe 2067 02:01:03.840 --> 02:01:08.479 it was a misunderstanding, and they they don't think that 2068 02:01:08.520 --> 02:01:12.920 they're that they they support their friend, and they don't 2069 02:01:13.039 --> 02:01:15.079 think that this happened something like that, but not as 2070 02:01:15.159 --> 02:01:18.920 not as plain out. That's what it meant. Again, if 2071 02:01:18.920 --> 02:01:21.199 somebody you know and here about was accused of sexual assault, 2072 02:01:21.680 --> 02:01:25.880 the only thing you should say is I'm surprised by this. 2073 02:01:25.880 --> 02:01:29.279 This is not how I know them to be that 2074 02:01:29.439 --> 02:01:31.560 said I was not there, and I will be making 2075 02:01:31.560 --> 02:01:34.039 no further comments because of that. That's what you should 2076 02:01:34.039 --> 02:01:37.159 be saying. Okay, because you weren't fucking there, You don't know, 2077 02:01:37.520 --> 02:01:39.880 and somebody could be one way with you in a 2078 02:01:39.880 --> 02:01:41.800 whole fucking different way with someone else. You were not 2079 02:01:42.000 --> 02:01:45.359 there unless you were standing there in the room where 2080 02:01:45.359 --> 02:01:48.760 it happened, and can say I was there the entire time. 2081 02:01:49.000 --> 02:01:52.359 You don't fucking know. Stay out of it. Nobody's asking 2082 02:01:52.399 --> 02:01:56.399 you to litigate this. This isn't for you to litigate. Okay, 2083 02:01:57.119 --> 02:01:59.880 you don't know, but that's how they said. They were like, mmmm, 2084 02:02:00.560 --> 02:02:05.039 I think she's I think she's confused. Lina says that 2085 02:02:07.159 --> 02:02:09.960 she doesn't even know. All she knows is there's a 2086 02:02:09.960 --> 02:02:14.640 lot of texting from Jenny, who was in LA and 2087 02:02:14.680 --> 02:02:17.479 they weren't really talking at this point. Genny was very avoidant. 2088 02:02:17.520 --> 02:02:19.680 She was very on and off. She was very like 2089 02:02:19.760 --> 02:02:22.279 pull you in, you're nice, sister, and then like you 2090 02:02:22.319 --> 02:02:24.119 get to set a couple of days later and she's like, 2091 02:02:24.439 --> 02:02:26.800 I cannot deal with you right now, and like would 2092 02:02:26.800 --> 02:02:29.560 not talk to you. She would look at you like 2093 02:02:29.640 --> 02:02:33.399 you you'd be cool one minute and and and then 2094 02:02:33.439 --> 02:02:35.760 you'd take a plane ride together and she would refuse 2095 02:02:35.840 --> 02:02:39.079 to look at you, like even as she was like that. 2096 02:02:39.439 --> 02:02:42.079 And Lena is anxious, she has anxiety disorder. She is 2097 02:02:42.119 --> 02:02:46.039 an anxious, anxious person, and so she's try constantly trying 2098 02:02:46.039 --> 02:02:49.720 to win Genny back, and Jenny would come close and 2099 02:02:49.760 --> 02:02:52.159 then move away, come close, and they move away. So 2100 02:02:52.159 --> 02:03:00.039 a this point they're not even really talking, and so 2101 02:03:00.079 --> 02:03:03.279 they are texting about this, and she Lina's like, I 2102 02:03:03.439 --> 02:03:08.119 wasn't even I don't even know how the statement was made. 2103 02:03:08.760 --> 02:03:12.159 I don't know. I just know that, like it came 2104 02:03:12.199 --> 02:03:14.000 to conclusion that a statement had to be made, and 2105 02:03:14.039 --> 02:03:16.159 then it went off. And she doesn't say she didn't 2106 02:03:16.159 --> 02:03:18.239 know what was in there. She does say that she 2107 02:03:18.359 --> 02:03:21.560 was not in her right mind and her mother tried 2108 02:03:21.560 --> 02:03:23.039 to take her phone from her, and it was like, 2109 02:03:23.439 --> 02:03:25.239 not today. You don't need to be doing this today. 2110 02:03:25.720 --> 02:03:27.199 There's no need for you to make a statement, and 2111 02:03:27.279 --> 02:03:30.520 certainly not today. And I don't know how Lena got 2112 02:03:30.520 --> 02:03:33.079 the phone back. She was bedridden, just run away from her. 2113 02:03:33.159 --> 02:03:36.000 She can't chase you, just like that lady in the walmart. 2114 02:03:36.079 --> 02:03:37.960 She can't. I would have just taken her phone. I 2115 02:03:37.960 --> 02:03:39.560 would have taken her phone because I wouldn't want her 2116 02:03:39.600 --> 02:03:41.239 to be doing workshit while she was doing it. I 2117 02:03:41.239 --> 02:03:43.079 would have taken her phone. I would have taken her phone. 2118 02:03:43.079 --> 02:03:45.800 I would have put an auto responder saying Lena is 2119 02:03:46.159 --> 02:03:48.520 recovering from major surgery and we'll get back to you 2120 02:03:49.600 --> 02:03:51.560 at another as soon as she can, and that's it. 2121 02:03:51.640 --> 02:03:59.359 I wouldn't. But somehow Lena in and out gives the okay, 2122 02:03:59.359 --> 02:04:02.319 and this goes out and people hate her. See here's 2123 02:04:02.319 --> 02:04:05.520 the thing. It wouldn't just like conserved people that hated Lena. 2124 02:04:05.760 --> 02:04:08.840 It was also like feminist feminist heated her too, like 2125 02:04:08.840 --> 02:04:12.840 when she did like a photo shooter, like I can't 2126 02:04:12.840 --> 02:04:16.000 believe this is retouch I'll put it. We'll give like 2127 02:04:16.199 --> 02:04:18.000 a certain amount of money if they can bring us 2128 02:04:18.000 --> 02:04:21.800 the untouched, unretouched photos. I remember shit like this, Like 2129 02:04:22.039 --> 02:04:25.199 everyone hated her. People were like, she gives feminists a 2130 02:04:25.239 --> 02:04:28.199 bad name, she gives millennials a bad name, she gives 2131 02:04:28.239 --> 02:04:30.800 women who live in Brooklyn a bad name. And I'm like, 2132 02:04:33.520 --> 02:04:36.279 why would you do this? Why didn't you do this? 2133 02:04:37.039 --> 02:04:40.239 Shed n She you know, they exploded people and she 2134 02:04:40.239 --> 02:04:42.239 said people started texting her and she said. Normally when 2135 02:04:42.239 --> 02:04:44.760 she had scandals, people would not even mention it or 2136 02:04:44.800 --> 02:04:46.880 they like shy away from it. But people were like, 2137 02:04:46.920 --> 02:04:49.560 why would you straight up sitting her text mege, why 2138 02:04:49.560 --> 02:04:52.279 would you do this? Like friends and family and things 2139 02:04:52.319 --> 02:04:56.039 like that. She ended up retracting in she apologized and everything, 2140 02:04:56.079 --> 02:05:05.359 but there's a point where she's like I didn't, I didn't. 2141 02:05:05.840 --> 02:05:07.640 I don't wanna get into it or something like that. 2142 02:05:08.279 --> 02:05:10.680 Uh now and I don't wanna get into it then 2143 02:05:11.159 --> 02:05:14.039 like something and I'm like, no, get into it. She's 2144 02:05:14.119 --> 02:05:16.880 very vague about she doesn't describe a situation. I had 2145 02:05:16.920 --> 02:05:18.279 to google it and be like, what the fuck is 2146 02:05:18.319 --> 02:05:20.479 she talking about? Cause she's talking about the big bad thing. 2147 02:05:20.840 --> 02:05:25.399 I was like, oh, I remember this, so I wanna 2148 02:05:25.439 --> 02:05:28.199 be clear, Like Lena Dunham is not apologizing for anything. 2149 02:05:29.279 --> 02:05:31.680 She does regret things, but she's not apologizing, like she's 2150 02:05:31.680 --> 02:05:36.119 not apologizing that thing or sibling. She does talk about 2151 02:05:36.159 --> 02:05:40.960 regretting and she did make apologies for this thing. Uh. 2152 02:05:41.600 --> 02:05:46.199 She's not like getting deep into it though, And I 2153 02:05:46.239 --> 02:05:49.960 know Liza told me that like she liked that because 2154 02:05:49.960 --> 02:05:52.760 she doesn't believe that Lena Dunham can really apologize and 2155 02:05:52.840 --> 02:05:56.000 mean it okay, I think that's fair. But what struck 2156 02:05:56.079 --> 02:05:58.760 me is that she's doing a third person. She's the 2157 02:05:58.800 --> 02:06:01.439 way she is talking about the events that happening here, 2158 02:06:01.920 --> 02:06:07.479 from like begging that alcoholic sees your guide to fuck 2159 02:06:07.560 --> 02:06:11.039 her in ice you when her when her just before 2160 02:06:11.039 --> 02:06:12.960 her hysterectomy was taken out. I don't know why. I 2161 02:06:13.039 --> 02:06:16.000 was like, imagine being a doctor that comes in like 2162 02:06:16.000 --> 02:06:17.399 a couple of hours later and I was like, why is 2163 02:06:17.439 --> 02:06:23.159 this full of stevement? That's not how it works, for instance, 2164 02:06:23.359 --> 02:06:26.000 But that was the first I was like, mmm, that 2165 02:06:26.159 --> 02:06:28.239 nurse was like, damn, there's a lot of suit what 2166 02:06:30.600 --> 02:06:34.079 That's not how bodies work. But like stuff like that, 2167 02:06:34.119 --> 02:06:36.319 when she talks about it, she talks about like she's 2168 02:06:36.359 --> 02:06:39.640 an outside party telling the story of this to somebody else. 2169 02:06:40.199 --> 02:06:43.960 That's the intellectual intellectually part that I'm talking intellectualizing part 2170 02:06:44.000 --> 02:06:48.880 I'm talking about is that she is not talking about 2171 02:06:49.439 --> 02:06:51.680 most of the time what it feels to be in this. 2172 02:06:52.239 --> 02:06:55.800 She is like telling us what happened, and that that's good. 2173 02:06:55.840 --> 02:06:57.800 I did enjoy that part, but I just thought it 2174 02:06:57.840 --> 02:07:01.720 was interesting that she could have been She could have 2175 02:07:01.760 --> 02:07:05.239 been doing the biography of somebody else. She really could 2176 02:07:05.239 --> 02:07:10.039 have been with the way she talked about this, she 2177 02:07:10.159 --> 02:07:15.960 said I could try to explain, but basically like that 2178 02:07:16.000 --> 02:07:17.800 wouldn't help it. I'm like, no, no, try to explain. 2179 02:07:21.039 --> 02:07:23.079 She actually she said she didn't kill her, She didn't 2180 02:07:23.199 --> 02:07:26.079 have suicide attempt, but she tried to stop living. She stopped. 2181 02:07:26.199 --> 02:07:28.319 It was more passive like that. She was deep in 2182 02:07:28.399 --> 02:07:31.840 the pills, she was not eating, she didn't care about 2183 02:07:31.840 --> 02:07:34.600 anything like it was, you know a lot of his 2184 02:07:34.640 --> 02:07:37.439 other stuff. She doesn't understand why there was like outcry, 2185 02:07:37.479 --> 02:07:43.279 but she understands this Genny and her breakup. So Jenny 2186 02:07:44.000 --> 02:07:49.680 flies to her after because they had a PR crisis afterwards, 2187 02:07:49.680 --> 02:07:53.199 and she's like, they're like on speaker phone, Genny's crying. 2188 02:07:53.399 --> 02:07:56.680 I'm like, Genny, why did you do this? Lena says 2189 02:07:56.720 --> 02:07:58.680 she did it because she was fucking out of it 2190 02:07:58.720 --> 02:08:03.000 on medical grade heroin? Why did you do this? Were 2191 02:08:03.039 --> 02:08:06.279 you also in medical grade? Heroine? Why did y'all think 2192 02:08:06.319 --> 02:08:08.439 you had to do this? Did something? Did the suits 2193 02:08:08.479 --> 02:08:11.000 at HBO? I don't think the suits at HBO told 2194 02:08:11.039 --> 02:08:12.520 you to do that shit. I think they were like, 2195 02:08:12.600 --> 02:08:16.880 shut up, I don't I don't think so, Like I 2196 02:08:16.920 --> 02:08:20.880 don't know, man, I really don't fucking know. And I 2197 02:08:20.920 --> 02:08:22.279 remember being on the internet on this day and like 2198 02:08:22.279 --> 02:08:25.640 I said, it was like people were like what everybody 2199 02:08:25.680 --> 02:08:34.359 was screaming? Yeah, like hum but l l she was crying. 2200 02:08:34.399 --> 02:08:37.840 They never talked about this. They've never talked about this, 2201 02:08:38.159 --> 02:08:44.119 the two of them, Lena and her. They end up 2202 02:08:44.159 --> 02:08:48.279 breaking up with the illness stuff and being away. Oh 2203 02:08:48.319 --> 02:08:50.399 another thing, I I want you to know. I was 2204 02:08:50.399 --> 02:08:51.880 listening to this on All Your Book and I fell 2205 02:08:51.920 --> 02:08:54.640 asleep and I woke up at the part where Lena 2206 02:08:54.760 --> 02:09:01.560 is graphically talking about per sexual assault, that doctor bursting 2207 02:09:01.640 --> 02:09:09.479 her over or very insist and like talking about her 2208 02:09:09.560 --> 02:09:12.119 childhood molestation, which is also sexual but still you know 2209 02:09:12.119 --> 02:09:17.039 what I'm saying, describing it all graphically, That's where I 2210 02:09:17.039 --> 02:09:18.520 woke up and I was like, where the fuck am I? 2211 02:09:19.000 --> 02:09:21.760 What's going on? Oh? I just take a break for 2212 02:09:21.800 --> 02:09:30.039 a day after that. Who was this saying? Oh? So 2213 02:09:30.079 --> 02:09:33.039 she's very ill and she's just like not on set. 2214 02:09:33.159 --> 02:09:36.359 She's they they have a new show, Camping, which I 2215 02:09:36.399 --> 02:09:42.079 didn't Again, I don't follow her like that, and she's 2216 02:09:42.079 --> 02:09:45.560 doing her a lot of writing away and things aren't working. 2217 02:09:45.560 --> 02:09:49.000 Camping only went for one season, like she just and 2218 02:09:49.039 --> 02:09:53.920 her and Jenny are not communicative. Oh what was I saying? 2219 02:09:55.039 --> 02:09:59.760 I was gonna see something else that that uh happened 2220 02:09:59.760 --> 02:10:06.520 with you? I've forgotten, Oh I'll remember it again. But 2221 02:10:07.560 --> 02:10:09.880 like when that book deal came out and like a 2222 02:10:09.880 --> 02:10:11.399 lot of stuff got leaked about how much she got paid, 2223 02:10:11.439 --> 02:10:13.800 Jenny wasn't talking to her for a while, Like it 2224 02:10:13.840 --> 02:10:15.279 was it was a lot of that, but they kind 2225 02:10:15.319 --> 02:10:19.960 of like drift apart, and like a lot of times 2226 02:10:21.039 --> 02:10:23.920 Jenny would be texting really mean shit. It was like 2227 02:10:24.000 --> 02:10:26.359 a relationship, like Lena was kind of begging her to 2228 02:10:26.399 --> 02:10:28.239 love her, to take her back. Oh, I remember what 2229 02:10:28.279 --> 02:10:32.239 I was gonna say. When Lena had that realization and 2230 02:10:32.319 --> 02:10:35.720 had all these connections and basically was high out of 2231 02:10:35.720 --> 02:10:38.800 her fucking mind on the pain pills, she called Jenny 2232 02:10:39.199 --> 02:10:44.960 and was screaming this stuff at her, this very traumatic 2233 02:10:44.960 --> 02:10:47.319 stuff that I woke up from, like being like, oh 2234 02:10:47.399 --> 02:10:50.800 my god, where am I? She called Jenny, was screaming 2235 02:10:50.840 --> 02:10:52.439 the stuff at her and basically was saying, no one 2236 02:10:52.479 --> 02:10:54.399 protected me then, and no one's protected me now. I 2237 02:10:54.399 --> 02:10:56.640 do believe people weren't protecting her. She was a product 2238 02:10:56.680 --> 02:10:59.079 and HBO would just be like, we need you to 2239 02:10:59.079 --> 02:11:02.079 confirm with this doctor. HBO will be like you, we're 2240 02:11:02.079 --> 02:11:03.880 gonna put you on a jet, and but you so 2241 02:11:03.960 --> 02:11:06.359 you can join. So you must go to this Wars 2242 02:11:06.359 --> 02:11:09.560 show and then you have to be at Tiffany's to 2243 02:11:09.560 --> 02:11:12.560 give them back your to give them back your jewels, 2244 02:11:12.560 --> 02:11:13.720 and then we'll put you on a jet to go 2245 02:11:13.720 --> 02:11:15.640 to the funeral. No, you do have to show up 2246 02:11:15.640 --> 02:11:17.520 for that. No, you can't be gone for six weeks. 2247 02:11:17.880 --> 02:11:20.000 Like I do believe there was a lot of pressure 2248 02:11:20.039 --> 02:11:22.239 from the and they were not and they sent her 2249 02:11:22.279 --> 02:11:25.199 to that doctor and he was rude and crazy, and 2250 02:11:25.239 --> 02:11:31.880 then he did that to her, uh that sort of 2251 02:11:32.199 --> 02:11:36.760 like she wasn't being protected. And her father did say 2252 02:11:36.760 --> 02:11:40.000 to her, he was like, you are the golden goose, 2253 02:11:40.760 --> 02:11:43.319 and remember that they treat the golden goose. Well, they're 2254 02:11:43.479 --> 02:11:46.920 the like a beloved pet. But they don't want the goose. 2255 02:11:46.960 --> 02:11:51.399 They want the eggs. They want the gold eggs. And 2256 02:11:51.439 --> 02:11:56.640 then when you are not, when you're not laying eggs anymore, you'll, 2257 02:11:56.760 --> 02:11:58.359 you know, you'll go off to the butcher and they'll 2258 02:11:58.399 --> 02:12:01.399 eat you for dinner. And he's fucking right about that. 2259 02:12:01.640 --> 02:12:08.359 Like they were like Lina was Lina was exhausting. Lina 2260 02:12:08.560 --> 02:12:11.079 was a problem, and Lina was a problem to be solved, 2261 02:12:11.960 --> 02:12:14.000 and a lot of times they solved it by being like, 2262 02:12:14.079 --> 02:12:18.079 here do this. Here, go to this horrible doctor. Here, 2263 02:12:18.239 --> 02:12:21.760 what do you mean your grandma died? Who cares about that? Here? 2264 02:12:21.800 --> 02:12:24.279 You need to work with your broken elbow. You will 2265 02:12:24.439 --> 02:12:27.319 just put the elbow swollen up and shit it. She 2266 02:12:27.359 --> 02:12:30.239 broke the elbow falling. Uh. They were doing the scene 2267 02:12:30.840 --> 02:12:33.960 and during like the with Adam, and during like the 2268 02:12:34.239 --> 02:12:36.199 you know Adam hat started like I don't know if 2269 02:12:36.199 --> 02:12:39.920 Adam had started Star Wars, but he probably was in 2270 02:12:39.920 --> 02:12:41.920 like pre production or something like that for it, or 2271 02:12:41.960 --> 02:12:44.600 like he knew who's getting the part, but he had. 2272 02:12:45.399 --> 02:12:48.800 He was playing lightsabers with curtain rots with a little 2273 02:12:48.840 --> 02:12:50.319 boy and she moved tried to get out of their 2274 02:12:50.359 --> 02:12:53.079 way and fell and they were like, yeah, you're gonna 2275 02:12:53.079 --> 02:12:56.119 put it. First of all, they they they needed to 2276 02:12:56.199 --> 02:12:58.720 like do exams to see if she broke it, like 2277 02:12:59.359 --> 02:13:01.920 and instead of waiting for it the next day, that 2278 02:13:01.960 --> 02:13:03.479 was the one more day they wouldn't be able to shoot. 2279 02:13:03.600 --> 02:13:05.079 So they're like, no, no, no, come back to set. 2280 02:13:05.439 --> 02:13:07.720 And if they say tomorrow's broken, and it's broken, and 2281 02:13:07.760 --> 02:13:09.319 they just put it in a sling. And they just 2282 02:13:09.399 --> 02:13:12.720 were like, well, take it off while you're filming, and 2283 02:13:12.720 --> 02:13:14.920 then you put it in a sling when you when 2284 02:13:15.359 --> 02:13:18.479 we're not like that's the way they treated her. She 2285 02:13:18.640 --> 02:13:20.960 was the golden goose, but she was only valuable because 2286 02:13:20.960 --> 02:13:27.199 she was laying eggs and she wasn't protected. But this 2287 02:13:27.279 --> 02:13:29.520 is not a thing you call up your business partner. 2288 02:13:29.560 --> 02:13:34.119 Even sometimes you guys call each other best friends, this 2289 02:13:34.279 --> 02:13:37.800 is not a thing that you call up your business 2290 02:13:37.840 --> 02:13:40.399 partner and say out of the blue, that is wild. 2291 02:13:40.479 --> 02:13:42.840 I told you, guys, I worked with a woman when 2292 02:13:42.840 --> 02:13:45.439 I lived in New York who had been sexually assaulted, 2293 02:13:46.119 --> 02:13:50.359 and she would bring it up all the time. Anytime 2294 02:13:50.680 --> 02:13:54.359 you were talking to her about something that she needed 2295 02:13:54.359 --> 02:13:56.159 to take care of aability before, she would bring it 2296 02:13:56.239 --> 02:14:01.399 up and she would just say, like I I swear 2297 02:14:01.439 --> 02:14:03.800 to god. It would be stuff like hey, you gotta 2298 02:14:03.880 --> 02:14:07.159 stop using all the paper and a printer and not 2299 02:14:07.199 --> 02:14:09.760 putting more paper in it because the next person has 2300 02:14:09.760 --> 02:14:11.520 to do all this stuff. And she would just be like, 2301 02:14:12.079 --> 02:14:14.800 I'm sorry. You know that I was sexually assaulted and 2302 02:14:15.600 --> 02:14:17.840 apparently it happened many years ago, but whatever she it 2303 02:14:17.920 --> 02:14:22.079 doesn't matter when it happened. And while I think people 2304 02:14:22.119 --> 02:14:25.239 have a right to talk about the things, like, first 2305 02:14:25.239 --> 02:14:27.239 of all, I wasn't the right person to talk about it, 2306 02:14:27.239 --> 02:14:30.760 and you have no idea about whether I've been sexually assaulted, 2307 02:14:30.880 --> 02:14:33.960 and you are telling me details and using that in 2308 02:14:34.000 --> 02:14:37.920 an office setting, and like what that does to me 2309 02:14:38.079 --> 02:14:40.560 to hear that? Who didn't ask for it? And I'm 2310 02:14:40.600 --> 02:14:43.520 not the appropriate source. It's not like it's my job 2311 02:14:43.600 --> 02:14:46.960 to hear you recount this sexual assault over and over again. 2312 02:14:47.399 --> 02:14:49.520 And like I felt for her, but I was also like, 2313 02:14:49.640 --> 02:14:53.359 you are you can't do this to me over and 2314 02:14:53.399 --> 02:14:55.479 over and over again. You can't do this to me, 2315 02:14:56.560 --> 02:15:00.239 And that's what Jenny was like, you need to talk 2316 02:15:00.279 --> 02:15:03.840 to your mother or a therapist, but I am not 2317 02:15:05.479 --> 02:15:13.159 going to I am not like the person. I cannot 2318 02:15:13.880 --> 02:15:19.640 do this. And I think Jenny was right. Like Lena 2319 02:15:19.680 --> 02:15:21.840 also talked about being high as fuck on the pain 2320 02:15:21.920 --> 02:15:23.840 meds and like texting people she never talk with them. 2321 02:15:23.920 --> 02:15:26.880 Was like, hi, bro, what like just like she shouldn't 2322 02:15:26.880 --> 02:15:28.800 have had her fucking phone is what she shouldn't have had. 2323 02:15:30.439 --> 02:15:32.239 I would have taken her phone and ran I swear 2324 02:15:32.239 --> 02:15:34.000 to God, she can't chase me. She can be mad, 2325 02:15:34.039 --> 02:15:41.239 but she can't chase me. And so like I just 2326 02:15:41.239 --> 02:15:46.439 feel I just feel like I'm gonna say this. I 2327 02:15:46.560 --> 02:15:55.319 just feel like like Jinny definitely has some Genny has 2328 02:15:55.359 --> 02:15:57.720 some stories of her own right, and I know that 2329 02:15:57.720 --> 02:16:01.079 she's walking around telling everybody about this. She's so much older, 2330 02:16:01.520 --> 02:16:05.359 like I have to babysit this kid. I don't think 2331 02:16:05.359 --> 02:16:07.239 they are best friends. I think she thought of Lena 2332 02:16:07.279 --> 02:16:10.000 as like sort of a pet, you know, maybe a 2333 02:16:10.000 --> 02:16:14.239 pet golden goose, whatever, and she would hear things, Lena 2334 02:16:14.279 --> 02:16:18.079 would hear things that that Ginny had said. Suddenly the 2335 02:16:18.119 --> 02:16:20.800 parties that they that they would playing together, Lena wasn't 2336 02:16:20.800 --> 02:16:24.479 invited to. And this has happened to many friend at 2337 02:16:24.479 --> 02:16:29.319 the time, mostly because people feel really people feel away 2338 02:16:29.359 --> 02:16:31.920 when you get famous, when you get rich, they feel away, 2339 02:16:32.000 --> 02:16:36.120 whether they it's conscious or not. It's a lot about 2340 02:16:36.159 --> 02:16:39.559 like why does she deserve that and not me? And 2341 02:16:39.600 --> 02:16:42.680 maybe even though not me part is not is not conscious, 2342 02:16:42.719 --> 02:16:44.520 but it's more like why did she what did she 2343 02:16:44.559 --> 02:16:46.840 do to deserve this? And that's not a reason why 2344 02:16:46.879 --> 02:16:49.040 people don't like Lena Dunham they think shit fell in 2345 02:16:49.079 --> 02:16:51.559 her lap. The thing is, Lena is an excellent writer. 2346 02:16:52.200 --> 02:16:57.000 She is very insightful again about herself. She's she's funny too. 2347 02:16:57.079 --> 02:16:59.879 There's a couple of times she's pretty funny, but that 2348 02:17:00.079 --> 02:17:02.760 doesn't mean that like and I think a lot of 2349 02:17:02.760 --> 02:17:05.639 people think, oh, she was just given this because she's 2350 02:17:05.680 --> 02:17:10.399 got rich family in them. Not really, so Genny and 2351 02:17:11.159 --> 02:17:15.120 like they aren't talking. Genny's sending like Superman text. I 2352 02:17:15.120 --> 02:17:19.639 think Lina is too, and Genny wants to talk, and 2353 02:17:19.719 --> 02:17:22.000 Lina's like, I will talk to you in a therapist's office, 2354 02:17:22.159 --> 02:17:26.760 and they do, and I immediately just Genny's like, Okay, 2355 02:17:26.760 --> 02:17:34.799 we're done. It's not like they worked on anything. And 2356 02:17:34.879 --> 02:17:39.120 Genny just asked that if you, I know you're gonna 2357 02:17:39.120 --> 02:17:42.200 write about this, If you're in relation to Lena Dunham, 2358 02:17:42.479 --> 02:17:44.680 a person like Lena Dunham, they are gonna write about you. 2359 02:17:45.559 --> 02:17:48.360 They are gonna write about you like me. If you're 2360 02:17:48.360 --> 02:17:50.440 in relationship with me, I am gonna talk about you 2361 02:17:50.479 --> 02:17:52.159 on this podcast, and I am gonna write about you. 2362 02:17:53.360 --> 02:17:57.760 It's just how it is. And I think people are 2363 02:17:57.799 --> 02:18:01.479 allowed to write about their experiences. And if you were 2364 02:18:01.520 --> 02:18:03.680 a part of the experience. Okay, they're wanna write about you. 2365 02:18:03.879 --> 02:18:06.000 There are a few exceptions, obviously, there are a few 2366 02:18:06.000 --> 02:18:10.200 ethical exceptions, which Lena was the Lena would not talk 2367 02:18:10.200 --> 02:18:13.360 about her kids in her relationship with her kids. She 2368 02:18:13.360 --> 02:18:14.959 said that she tried to write this book several times. 2369 02:18:15.000 --> 02:18:17.639 I don't even mention Jenny. I was like, ah, that 2370 02:18:17.680 --> 02:18:22.159 makes sense. Yeah, And like the rest of the book 2371 02:18:22.200 --> 02:18:25.520 is very like like I said, things do change for 2372 02:18:25.600 --> 02:18:29.360 her in certain ways. She doesn't, you know what. Maybe 2373 02:18:29.360 --> 02:18:31.200 I'll like give her a little slack on that cause 2374 02:18:31.239 --> 02:18:32.600 I just tried to explain to you how I got 2375 02:18:32.600 --> 02:18:35.280 out of my cyclone, and I just couldn't. I just couldn't. 2376 02:18:36.000 --> 02:18:42.200 She Lena just recounts the events that happened. And I 2377 02:18:42.239 --> 02:18:45.600 don't know if she gave us a I'm all better thing. 2378 02:18:45.719 --> 02:18:48.920 I think she's still dealing with chronic illness. Uh, she's 2379 02:18:49.000 --> 02:18:56.040 de still dealing with body stuff. She still uh, she's married. Now. 2380 02:18:56.120 --> 02:19:03.920 I saw like pictures of them. They look like two Uh, 2381 02:19:05.000 --> 02:19:09.120 they look like they like two people you meet at 2382 02:19:09.159 --> 02:19:15.399 a comic con convention. And they smell like a very 2383 02:19:15.440 --> 02:19:19.120 spicy smell that you wouldn't like be able to identify it. 2384 02:19:20.120 --> 02:19:21.959 I didn't say they smell like weed. I didn't s 2385 02:19:21.959 --> 02:19:24.040 say they smell like petuli. It would be like a 2386 02:19:24.079 --> 02:19:27.760 spicy smell. Though they'd be all over each other. Okay, 2387 02:19:27.920 --> 02:19:31.799 but like, and I don't like her super dark hair 2388 02:19:31.840 --> 02:19:34.600 right now. I don't like that, but uh that's part 2389 02:19:34.600 --> 02:19:38.360 of what. But yeah, they they seem fine. She seems happy. 2390 02:19:38.559 --> 02:19:43.840 I'm happy for her. I don't know. You know how 2391 02:19:43.879 --> 02:19:52.840 we got like three we got like three documentaries from 2392 02:19:54.920 --> 02:20:00.719 we got three documentaries from uh D me Levado, and 2393 02:20:00.760 --> 02:20:03.440 they were all like, and everything's fine, and then she 2394 02:20:03.479 --> 02:20:05.799 would come back and be like, ha ha, it wasn't fine. 2395 02:20:05.840 --> 02:20:07.879 I was high when I said that, I don't know 2396 02:20:07.879 --> 02:20:09.879 if we're gonna come back to Lena, And she's like 2397 02:20:10.120 --> 02:20:12.559 and oh, they did talk a lot about her rehab stay. 2398 02:20:12.680 --> 02:20:14.840 I didn't it was fine. I didn't find it super 2399 02:20:14.920 --> 02:20:19.200 interesting and her kind of even there a meshment with 2400 02:20:19.239 --> 02:20:26.159 one of the younger patients. Yeah, but I don't know. 2401 02:20:26.239 --> 02:20:28.040 I don't know if Lena will come back with a 2402 02:20:28.079 --> 02:20:31.760 book and be like, actually, I was in this relationship. 2403 02:20:31.920 --> 02:20:35.120 My husband was a status and I was being and 2404 02:20:35.159 --> 02:20:38.799 I was used to being treated terribly and he also 2405 02:20:38.840 --> 02:20:42.239 had a crack cocaine addiction. And I didn't even notice 2406 02:20:42.280 --> 02:20:44.079 at first. I always knew he had a little glass 2407 02:20:44.120 --> 02:20:46.639 pipe with him, but what is that? You know? Like 2408 02:20:49.319 --> 02:20:52.879 his lips were amazing. I could draw them like, I 2409 02:20:52.879 --> 02:20:54.520 don't know if that's what she's gonna come back with, 2410 02:20:54.680 --> 02:20:58.360 but maybe who knows. Anyway, I've i've I've spoken over 2411 02:20:58.399 --> 02:21:01.520 two hours about this and that goes to show you 2412 02:21:01.639 --> 02:21:05.120 how interested I was in this book, how many times 2413 02:21:05.120 --> 02:21:08.120 I could relate, how many times I was like, oh, 2414 02:21:08.159 --> 02:21:12.799 that's interesting. I didn't know that I was laughing earlier 2415 02:21:12.840 --> 02:21:16.120 about how often I was like, that's interesting. This is 2416 02:21:16.440 --> 02:21:18.399 like that. I kept using that word to talk about 2417 02:21:18.399 --> 02:21:21.280 this book. And I'm gonna use it again. It's a 2418 02:21:21.319 --> 02:21:27.120 very interesting book and I recommend it. And yeah, I'll 2419 02:21:27.120 --> 02:21:33.920 see you guys on the next one.