WEBVTT 1 00:00:04.160 --> 00:00:09.199 Welcome back to Nursing Uncensored. Hi guys, Oh my god, 2 00:00:09.759 --> 00:00:13.679 it has been forever, and yes I still exist. I 3 00:00:13.720 --> 00:00:15.599 feel like I put on an episode like this every 4 00:00:16.039 --> 00:00:18.800 I don't know, twice a year, saying like, hey, I'm 5 00:00:18.800 --> 00:00:22.359 still here. Still, I still have recording equipment, I still 6 00:00:22.359 --> 00:00:25.399 have things to say. But I wanted to use this 7 00:00:25.480 --> 00:00:28.600 episode as an opportunity to catch you up on what 8 00:00:28.679 --> 00:00:32.000 the hell has been going on. And you, guys, I'm 9 00:00:32.359 --> 00:00:34.719 not even the same person that you used to listen to. 10 00:00:36.000 --> 00:00:40.200 After nineteen years of night shift bedside, I now work 11 00:00:40.320 --> 00:00:44.119 day shift in a clinic. You guys, hell has officially 12 00:00:44.200 --> 00:00:48.240 frozen over. Pigs do fly and Adrianne works day shift 13 00:00:48.479 --> 00:00:51.000 five days a week. I work from home one day 14 00:00:51.000 --> 00:00:53.439 a week. It also means that I have a two 15 00:00:53.679 --> 00:00:56.679 hour rush hour commute every day. One hour in, one 16 00:00:56.679 --> 00:00:59.200 hour out. Well it's like forty fifty minutes whatever. I 17 00:00:59.240 --> 00:01:01.520 still see patients the clinic, but by and large, a 18 00:01:01.520 --> 00:01:04.000 lot of what I'm doing is behind the scenes, very desky. 19 00:01:04.159 --> 00:01:07.200 Because I am now a nurse clinical coordinator. I'm one 20 00:01:07.200 --> 00:01:09.079 of two in my clinic, and I've been working with 21 00:01:09.120 --> 00:01:12.439 a really lovely travel nurse because my permanent counterpart, and 22 00:01:12.560 --> 00:01:16.239 my preceptor had a very beautiful baby, like three and 23 00:01:16.239 --> 00:01:18.439 a half weeks into my training, so it was a 24 00:01:18.439 --> 00:01:20.200 little bit of a crash landing for me. But the 25 00:01:20.200 --> 00:01:23.760 team has been really supportive. Now that I've been doing 26 00:01:23.799 --> 00:01:28.280 this since like second week in November, I feel like 27 00:01:28.319 --> 00:01:30.599 I'm getting a grasp on what I'm doing, doing it 28 00:01:30.640 --> 00:01:37.040 without as many fumbles. Every learning process is difficult at times, 29 00:01:37.359 --> 00:01:39.239 but let me just tell you the hardest part of 30 00:01:39.280 --> 00:01:41.920 this journey so far has been going from using the 31 00:01:42.040 --> 00:01:47.599 inpatient interface of EPIC to using the out patient interface 32 00:01:47.719 --> 00:01:51.079 for EPIC. Now instead of charting assessments and that endless 33 00:01:51.079 --> 00:01:56.120 spreadsheet that grid, now I'm searching notes, encounters, placing orders, 34 00:01:56.159 --> 00:01:58.680 sending facts is via EPIC and other things that are 35 00:01:58.719 --> 00:02:01.400 like completely new to me, whole new world. I spend 36 00:02:01.400 --> 00:02:04.920 four days in the clinic, work from home on Fridays, 37 00:02:04.959 --> 00:02:05.519 but then. 38 00:02:05.480 --> 00:02:07.879 Also like over the holidays, there were some days I. 39 00:02:07.879 --> 00:02:08.960 Was able to work from home. 40 00:02:09.639 --> 00:02:10.879 It was glorious. 41 00:02:11.520 --> 00:02:14.199 Let me tell you now, don't get it twisted. There's 42 00:02:14.199 --> 00:02:16.879 still a lot of frustration and still lots of work, 43 00:02:17.000 --> 00:02:19.840 but leaving bedside was the best thing I ever did 44 00:02:19.840 --> 00:02:23.199 for this forty three year old body. I had convinced 45 00:02:23.240 --> 00:02:26.639 myself everything was normal and manageable. This is my life, 46 00:02:26.759 --> 00:02:29.159 this is how I do it. But honestly, I was 47 00:02:29.199 --> 00:02:33.840 sleep deprived, chronically migraining, having GI issues. Many of you 48 00:02:33.960 --> 00:02:37.599 know that I now have some respiratory issues because of 49 00:02:37.639 --> 00:02:41.639 my post COVID bullshit. But when I started this job 50 00:02:41.680 --> 00:02:45.960 in November, I caught I think virus, I don't know what, 51 00:02:46.199 --> 00:02:49.039 but it lasted for like nine weeks. It turned into 52 00:02:49.039 --> 00:02:53.479 it sinus infection. It has been quite the change because, 53 00:02:53.560 --> 00:02:57.000 you know, switching from nights to days, I'm switching from 54 00:02:57.159 --> 00:02:59.240 twelve hour shifts to eight hour shifts. I'm going from 55 00:02:59.280 --> 00:03:01.800 very physically to demanding on my feet work to like 56 00:03:01.840 --> 00:03:04.800 sitting at a desk. I had to do two rounds 57 00:03:04.840 --> 00:03:07.439 of antibiotics to knock out the infection that was plaguing 58 00:03:07.479 --> 00:03:09.319 me for the first few months of the job. It 59 00:03:09.639 --> 00:03:11.199 was kind of it was kind of a rough start, 60 00:03:11.240 --> 00:03:15.000 but we're leveling out now. Anyway, back to the dayshift 61 00:03:15.000 --> 00:03:17.560 clinic work. I still wear my scrubs most of the 62 00:03:17.560 --> 00:03:21.560 time because I'm realizing I don't have any like business 63 00:03:21.560 --> 00:03:24.360 casual clothes, and I literally have not been out shopping 64 00:03:24.400 --> 00:03:26.039 since I started this job in November. 65 00:03:26.080 --> 00:03:27.759 So I wear my scrubs a lot. 66 00:03:27.840 --> 00:03:30.520 I wear like the four business casual outfits that I 67 00:03:30.560 --> 00:03:33.199 have on repeat. So yeah, I need to go shopping 68 00:03:34.039 --> 00:03:35.680 or I need to just be fine with the fact 69 00:03:35.719 --> 00:03:37.680 that I wear my scrubs every day still even though 70 00:03:37.719 --> 00:03:40.919 I don't need to. I'm in an interventional pulmonary clinic. 71 00:03:41.159 --> 00:03:44.919 We are the land of broncoscopies thor scentisis for those 72 00:03:44.960 --> 00:03:48.360 who don't know. Broncoscopy is where we take a long, 73 00:03:48.599 --> 00:03:51.080 snaky tube, put it down into the lungs with a 74 00:03:51.120 --> 00:03:54.719 camera at the end, can do biopsies that way, diagnose 75 00:03:54.800 --> 00:03:58.639 all sorts of things. And thora's are when the doctor 76 00:03:58.719 --> 00:04:00.879 poke people in the back to their lung sack and 77 00:04:00.919 --> 00:04:02.639 we drain out fluid they should not be there. In 78 00:04:02.639 --> 00:04:06.960 addition to give preop instructions, and I'm helping manage prescriptions 79 00:04:06.960 --> 00:04:11.560 for oxygen tunneled plural catheter supplies, refilling things that need 80 00:04:11.560 --> 00:04:14.319 to be refilled like Inhaler's steroids. You know, of course, 81 00:04:14.319 --> 00:04:16.800 there's all guidelines for this that I follow. They talk 82 00:04:16.839 --> 00:04:19.040 a lot about working at the top of your scope, 83 00:04:19.199 --> 00:04:22.600 which is a longer conversation that I want to have. Also, 84 00:04:22.920 --> 00:04:26.720 I'm working more closely with a lot of physicians, more 85 00:04:26.759 --> 00:04:29.279 so than I did at bedside. At the bedside, I 86 00:04:29.360 --> 00:04:32.120 was generally only calling our paging and provider something was 87 00:04:32.160 --> 00:04:36.480 wrong or something was missing from my orders. Occasionally, very occasionally, 88 00:04:36.519 --> 00:04:39.120 I would help with a bedside procedure, like I've helped 89 00:04:39.120 --> 00:04:42.560 with lumbar punctures before and bedside thoras and stuff like that. 90 00:04:42.959 --> 00:04:46.680 But those are all under predetermined parameters. And with the 91 00:04:46.759 --> 00:04:48.920 level of autonomy that I have comes you know, a 92 00:04:49.000 --> 00:04:52.120 lot of anxiety. So they basically feed me what orders 93 00:04:52.160 --> 00:04:53.639 they want me to put in. I put it in, 94 00:04:53.720 --> 00:04:56.759 I sign it. Our schedulers get them scheduled. When a 95 00:04:56.759 --> 00:04:59.040 patient is scheduled for a procedure, I call with like 96 00:04:59.079 --> 00:05:02.639 pre procedural and auctions, the usual stuff like NPO the 97 00:05:02.639 --> 00:05:04.439 morning of this is how long you have to be 98 00:05:04.439 --> 00:05:07.800 off your blood thinners? Patients can't do Oh yeah, here's 99 00:05:07.920 --> 00:05:10.279 here's a good note for all of you doing GLP ones. 100 00:05:11.439 --> 00:05:14.360 You should not take that within a week of having anaesthesia. 101 00:05:14.480 --> 00:05:16.279 So if your providers are not telling you this, you 102 00:05:16.279 --> 00:05:18.519 should know this. If you're going to have surgery, talk 103 00:05:18.560 --> 00:05:23.160 to them about your GLP ones. So anyway, this is 104 00:05:23.199 --> 00:05:24.920 what I do. I call people, tell them how many 105 00:05:24.959 --> 00:05:26.839 hours to be here, you need someone to drive you home, 106 00:05:26.839 --> 00:05:30.439 blah blah blah blah blah. Side note, you'd be surprised 107 00:05:30.439 --> 00:05:33.360 how many people think it's okay to come out of anesthesia, 108 00:05:33.680 --> 00:05:35.720 leave the recovery room and then hop in an uber 109 00:05:36.000 --> 00:05:39.360 or get on the CTA. No no, no, no, no, no no. 110 00:05:40.120 --> 00:05:43.319 I am not putting you in a downtown Chicago uber 111 00:05:43.560 --> 00:05:46.360 after you've just had a bunch of happy drugs because 112 00:05:46.399 --> 00:05:48.800 I want to make sure you actually get home. I 113 00:05:48.800 --> 00:05:51.720 don't want you to get kidnapped, fall down, go boom, 114 00:05:51.959 --> 00:05:54.480 not be able to find your apartment, lose your keys whatever. 115 00:05:54.879 --> 00:05:57.560 So yeah, so I call and I give people these instructions. 116 00:05:57.560 --> 00:05:59.439 Sometimes I have to call them multiple times because they 117 00:05:59.439 --> 00:06:03.319 don't get through them. Sometimes people don't remember the instructions 118 00:06:03.360 --> 00:06:05.360 and they call back and they go, hey, nobody called 119 00:06:05.399 --> 00:06:07.839 me with instructions, and I'm like, I called you twice. 120 00:06:09.079 --> 00:06:10.079 Healthcare stressful. 121 00:06:10.240 --> 00:06:12.839 People don't always know. There's lots of reasons why people 122 00:06:12.959 --> 00:06:15.040 need things repeated, and they're handheld. 123 00:06:15.120 --> 00:06:18.519 So this is what I do. I also help. 124 00:06:18.480 --> 00:06:21.959 Manage our clinic inbox, which actually entails a lot. I'm 125 00:06:22.000 --> 00:06:26.439 like helping facilitate referrals for new patients, communicating with providers, 126 00:06:26.600 --> 00:06:30.480 applying to patients that are calling us about symptoms, plan 127 00:06:30.560 --> 00:06:33.839 of care, stuff like that. People with chronic lung illnesses 128 00:06:34.079 --> 00:06:36.600 or that have just had procedures often call with questions 129 00:06:36.600 --> 00:06:39.360 and concerns, and I basically triage them over the phone. 130 00:06:39.600 --> 00:06:43.839 So triage, that's another skill that does not come naturally 131 00:06:43.879 --> 00:06:47.079 to me, because in the bedside world, if something was happening, 132 00:06:47.319 --> 00:06:49.759 I mostly knew it to look at, listen to what 133 00:06:49.839 --> 00:06:52.240 monitors to hook them up to. But when you're triaging 134 00:06:52.279 --> 00:06:55.000 someone over the phone, you can't see them. You can 135 00:06:55.079 --> 00:06:57.560 only only go off of what they tell you, how 136 00:06:57.560 --> 00:07:00.839 they answer your questions. This was a routine I had 137 00:07:00.879 --> 00:07:02.759 down at the bedside. I couldn't manage that shit like 138 00:07:02.759 --> 00:07:04.959 nobody's business. And if things got worse, I'd call in 139 00:07:05.040 --> 00:07:08.560 like rapid response or a physician or another team. Now 140 00:07:08.600 --> 00:07:11.319 I'm in a completely different world. The land of outpatient 141 00:07:11.360 --> 00:07:14.040 business is a little is different. I can't just be like, 142 00:07:15.000 --> 00:07:18.439 you know, here's here's a clean brief and an oxy codone, 143 00:07:18.519 --> 00:07:21.879 go to bed. I'm gonna abstain at this time from 144 00:07:21.959 --> 00:07:25.319 ranting about how people with terrible, scary symptoms always seem 145 00:07:25.360 --> 00:07:26.560 to call at the end of the day when I'm 146 00:07:26.600 --> 00:07:29.639 alone in the office without a provider to consult. So 147 00:07:30.800 --> 00:07:35.920 triage has been hard. Basically, you're not only trying to 148 00:07:35.920 --> 00:07:37.959 help the patient, you're trying to cover your ass from 149 00:07:37.959 --> 00:07:41.199 missing something that could be emergent. It's those of you 150 00:07:41.240 --> 00:07:42.000 that triage. 151 00:07:43.000 --> 00:07:43.839 I'm sure there. 152 00:07:43.720 --> 00:07:45.759 Are lots of people that triage are over the phone, 153 00:07:46.000 --> 00:07:49.199 lots of people triage in person. It's a skill, it's 154 00:07:49.199 --> 00:07:52.199 definitely a skill. So so this whole thing has been 155 00:07:52.240 --> 00:07:54.920 such a dramatic change, and I am loving it because 156 00:07:54.920 --> 00:07:58.120 I'm learning again. Now. It's not that I wasn't learning 157 00:07:58.160 --> 00:08:01.759 at the bedside, but this is like a whole new discipline. Normally, 158 00:08:01.759 --> 00:08:04.360 in the bedside world, my patients would go off to broncoscopy, 159 00:08:04.399 --> 00:08:06.800 they'd come back. I would have a little idea of 160 00:08:06.879 --> 00:08:09.160 what happened, why they were gone. I knew they got scoped, 161 00:08:09.600 --> 00:08:11.639 but I didn't know all the intricacies of it. I 162 00:08:11.639 --> 00:08:13.839 didn't know what went into it, all the hands behind it. 163 00:08:13.879 --> 00:08:15.600 And I had never seen a bronc with my own eyes. 164 00:08:15.639 --> 00:08:19.000 Well since his job started. I've been able to witness broncoscopy, 165 00:08:19.279 --> 00:08:23.879 thora's tunneled plural catheter insertion. There are plenty of things 166 00:08:23.879 --> 00:08:26.079 I would love to have the opportunity to see, like 167 00:08:26.680 --> 00:08:29.959 a rigid broncoscope, which is what some physicians I've heard 168 00:08:30.079 --> 00:08:34.759 not so affectionately called swords following. Instead of having like 169 00:08:34.799 --> 00:08:37.960 a flexible tube like bronchoscope, it's a long, rigid scope. 170 00:08:38.080 --> 00:08:40.000 I'll talk about that another day when I've learned more 171 00:08:40.000 --> 00:08:42.919 about the procedures we do. The things that I've learned 172 00:08:42.960 --> 00:08:45.720 have been so eye opening, and actually seeing these procedures 173 00:08:46.200 --> 00:08:48.279 happening in the in the Bronx suite feels like I'm 174 00:08:48.279 --> 00:08:50.399 a nurse for a first time in some ways, because 175 00:08:50.440 --> 00:08:53.759 I still have this awe of like, wow, that's really cool. 176 00:08:53.799 --> 00:08:55.639 I can't believe they're doing that. Can I see? What 177 00:08:55.679 --> 00:08:58.200 are you doing? What are you doing now? And unlike 178 00:08:58.200 --> 00:09:00.000 on the unit, I was like I've seen a lot 179 00:09:00.200 --> 00:09:02.600 bar or some other bedside, I've seen an LP like 180 00:09:02.639 --> 00:09:04.159 I don't need to watch this, I'm gonna go get 181 00:09:04.159 --> 00:09:06.879 some charting done. And now I have this whole other 182 00:09:06.919 --> 00:09:09.759 part of my brain that's lighting up because you know, 183 00:09:09.840 --> 00:09:14.200 I'm learning from providers, from books, from the pas. 184 00:09:13.759 --> 00:09:15.440 That I work with the other nurses. 185 00:09:16.240 --> 00:09:20.600 I literally learn at minimum one new thing every day. 186 00:09:20.720 --> 00:09:24.440 Some days it's a lot of new things. I alluded 187 00:09:24.519 --> 00:09:26.960 a little bit to my health status as a day shifter. 188 00:09:27.879 --> 00:09:31.639 I find it very interesting that for those of you 189 00:09:31.679 --> 00:09:38.360 who know, I was having chronic mind bending migraines for 190 00:09:38.519 --> 00:09:41.879 years and I have not had a single migraine since 191 00:09:41.919 --> 00:09:46.000 I switched to day shift, and due to other circumstances, 192 00:09:46.080 --> 00:09:48.679 I've been off of the intense medications I was on 193 00:09:48.720 --> 00:09:52.240 for them. So it's a coincidence. Now it hasn't been 194 00:09:52.240 --> 00:09:54.480 a long stretch, like it hasn't been six twelve months 195 00:09:54.519 --> 00:09:56.879 without a migraine, but it's been what like going on 196 00:09:57.000 --> 00:10:01.039 four That's unheard of for me historically. Now, I'm not 197 00:10:01.120 --> 00:10:04.960 saying that night shift was the reason for my migraines. 198 00:10:04.399 --> 00:10:06.440 But I don't know. Maybe night shift was the reason 199 00:10:06.600 --> 00:10:06.840 for my. 200 00:10:06.919 --> 00:10:12.639 Migraines, as I was saying before, I developed asthma from 201 00:10:12.759 --> 00:10:16.559 one encounter with COVID around Christmas of twenty two. I 202 00:10:16.600 --> 00:10:18.799 know the exact moment I got infected. It was from 203 00:10:18.799 --> 00:10:20.120 a ventilator and PP. 204 00:10:21.600 --> 00:10:22.240 It was a whole thing. 205 00:10:22.960 --> 00:10:25.039 And that's what contributed to me being gone from the 206 00:10:25.080 --> 00:10:28.039 podcast and the blog for so long, because I had 207 00:10:28.120 --> 00:10:30.919 asthma and I didn't know it. So here I was 208 00:10:30.960 --> 00:10:33.960 having these like horrible asthma attacks and going in for 209 00:10:34.120 --> 00:10:37.399 emergent or urgent care and they were like, girl, do 210 00:10:37.399 --> 00:10:39.559 you have asthma? And I was like, no, I've never 211 00:10:39.600 --> 00:10:41.720 had asthma before. I'm out a life, and They're like, 212 00:10:41.840 --> 00:10:45.600 well you do now. So I'm getting that under control 213 00:10:45.679 --> 00:10:46.960 now that I have daily meds for it. 214 00:10:47.000 --> 00:10:47.559 I feel good. 215 00:10:47.600 --> 00:10:52.440 I feel healthy, I feel energized. After starting this job, 216 00:10:52.440 --> 00:10:55.120 I ran into an old coworker at the taco place 217 00:10:55.159 --> 00:10:58.240 that's within the hospital, and oh yeah, and that's the 218 00:10:58.240 --> 00:11:00.799 other thing. The taco place is open when I'm at work. 219 00:11:01.000 --> 00:11:05.559 Lord help me, I've been eating so many fucking steak tacos. Anyway, 220 00:11:06.000 --> 00:11:07.639 ran into a woman that I used to work with. 221 00:11:07.799 --> 00:11:10.600 I'm inpatient. I said hi to her, and the first 222 00:11:10.600 --> 00:11:11.279 thing she said to. 223 00:11:11.240 --> 00:11:14.039 Me was, you look so happy. Damn right. 224 00:11:14.200 --> 00:11:17.799 I'm sleeping, I'm eating at normal times, I'm shitting at 225 00:11:17.799 --> 00:11:19.799 normal times. I'm able to be with my partner on 226 00:11:19.840 --> 00:11:23.080 the weekends because I don't work weekends or holidays anymore. 227 00:11:23.480 --> 00:11:25.159 That's a perk that I've got for the first time 228 00:11:25.399 --> 00:11:28.360 ever in my adult life since I moved out of 229 00:11:28.399 --> 00:11:32.919 my parents' home twenty twenty four. The holiday season was 230 00:11:32.960 --> 00:11:35.840 the first time that I have not worked a single 231 00:11:36.000 --> 00:11:39.039 winter holiday. No Thanksgiving, no Christmas, no New Year's. I 232 00:11:39.080 --> 00:11:41.120 didn't have to barter out of my shifts. I didn't 233 00:11:41.159 --> 00:11:46.000 have to trade and rearrange holiday dinners, and for the 234 00:11:46.000 --> 00:11:48.240 better part of the time between Christmas and New Year's 235 00:11:48.279 --> 00:11:50.919 I was working at home a lot. So I felt 236 00:11:50.919 --> 00:11:52.759 like I had fucking died and gone to heaven, like 237 00:11:52.840 --> 00:11:56.639 for real. When I get frustrated, like when I have 238 00:11:56.679 --> 00:11:59.679 a caller that's agitated or a doctor that's rud to 239 00:11:59.679 --> 00:12:01.519 me on the which by the way, is never one 240 00:12:01.519 --> 00:12:04.159 of my docs. The docs on my team are wonderful. 241 00:12:04.240 --> 00:12:06.519 They are not rude to me. It's like a whole 242 00:12:06.519 --> 00:12:08.679 separate thing. I'll talk about that in a minute. But 243 00:12:08.879 --> 00:12:11.200 there are frustrations, But I have to check myself and 244 00:12:11.240 --> 00:12:14.799 remind myself. You don't have four or five six collites 245 00:12:14.840 --> 00:12:17.320 going off. There's no one screaming for you. You don't 246 00:12:17.320 --> 00:12:21.919 have the overstimulation of alarms and beeping of phones and monitors, compewters. 247 00:12:22.320 --> 00:12:24.919 So I remind myself to sit in gratitude in this 248 00:12:25.039 --> 00:12:27.440 job because it would be very easy to become locked 249 00:12:27.480 --> 00:12:30.120 into the same negative mindset. So early in the game, 250 00:12:30.559 --> 00:12:33.519 trying to keep myself very aware that I am now 251 00:12:33.679 --> 00:12:36.240 in a place that I dreamed of being for years 252 00:12:36.320 --> 00:12:39.600 and I didn't think it would happen. So let's back 253 00:12:39.679 --> 00:12:41.480 up for a second. I'll tell you a little tale. 254 00:12:41.559 --> 00:12:45.519 How did I get this job? Okay, it was an accident, 255 00:12:45.960 --> 00:12:46.960 but it was on purpose. 256 00:12:47.320 --> 00:12:48.879 So what does that mean? 257 00:12:49.840 --> 00:12:52.600 Me and the girls, my night crew on night shift? 258 00:12:52.639 --> 00:12:53.559 Who I miss dearly? 259 00:12:54.440 --> 00:12:55.000 I really do. 260 00:12:55.320 --> 00:12:57.360 I don't miss the work, I don't miss the stress. 261 00:12:57.360 --> 00:12:59.840 I don't miss the emergencies. But I do miss the 262 00:12:59.840 --> 00:13:02.200 girls that I used to sit with. And I call 263 00:13:02.240 --> 00:13:04.600 them girls because they're like half my age. But they're 264 00:13:04.639 --> 00:13:06.639 wonderful because they didn't make me feel like an old part. 265 00:13:06.679 --> 00:13:08.799 We're all sitting around it's like two o'clock in the morning. 266 00:13:08.919 --> 00:13:11.000 I hear one of my coworkers talking about how she 267 00:13:11.120 --> 00:13:15.159 got a job in the pulmonary clinic, and I kept charting, 268 00:13:15.240 --> 00:13:15.559 but my. 269 00:13:15.559 --> 00:13:16.399 Ears perked up. 270 00:13:17.159 --> 00:13:20.080 I was like, at first, I was sad because I 271 00:13:20.080 --> 00:13:21.639 was like, oh, another nurse that I like is going 272 00:13:21.720 --> 00:13:24.039 to be leaving the unit. I'm listening to them talk 273 00:13:24.080 --> 00:13:27.039 and as we're talking about this great pulmonary position, we're 274 00:13:27.039 --> 00:13:29.399 all sitting at the cluster of computers where we were charting. 275 00:13:29.840 --> 00:13:32.879 And so I start just like casually, like I open 276 00:13:32.919 --> 00:13:35.080 a browser, I start looking at the in house ads 277 00:13:35.080 --> 00:13:39.360 for jobs, and quietly without saying much, just like scrolling through, 278 00:13:39.720 --> 00:13:42.919 and there was one that said clinical Coordinator IP, which 279 00:13:42.960 --> 00:13:45.440 is interventional pulmonology. Now, at the time, I thought this 280 00:13:45.600 --> 00:13:47.840 was the same clinic that my coworker had gotten into, 281 00:13:48.559 --> 00:13:50.120 And I thought, wouldn't that be great, not only if 282 00:13:50.120 --> 00:13:51.759 I applied for this job, but had someone that I 283 00:13:51.799 --> 00:13:54.720 know already there. They can potentially put in a good 284 00:13:54.759 --> 00:13:57.360 word for me, and I'll have a familiar face when 285 00:13:57.399 --> 00:14:01.960 I start this totally new world. So at the time 286 00:14:01.960 --> 00:14:04.360 of applying, I didn't know if the job was still available, 287 00:14:04.399 --> 00:14:06.679 if they were still interviewing for it. The way the 288 00:14:06.679 --> 00:14:09.960 system is set up, it's not that easy to tell 289 00:14:10.000 --> 00:14:11.879 those things. But I couldn't hold back. I was like, 290 00:14:11.879 --> 00:14:14.240 fuck it, I'm going to apply. I have a resume. 291 00:14:14.759 --> 00:14:17.480 I've got the resume in my Google drive been working 292 00:14:17.559 --> 00:14:20.120 on it for a while, which, by the way, side 293 00:14:20.120 --> 00:14:22.600 note not sponsored and I'm not at all affiliated with her, 294 00:14:22.679 --> 00:14:25.639 but I use Nurse Fern's resume template and let me 295 00:14:25.639 --> 00:14:28.360 tell you, two o'clock that morning, I don't remember what 296 00:14:28.399 --> 00:14:30.399 it was. It was like a Thursday or Friday or 297 00:14:30.440 --> 00:14:33.840 something like that. Submitted my resume to the website, and 298 00:14:33.879 --> 00:14:37.279 by Monday I had a phone call in an interview scheduled. 299 00:14:37.360 --> 00:14:40.840 I could not believe it. I got they want to 300 00:14:40.879 --> 00:14:43.039 hire me? Are you serious? This was totally accidental. I 301 00:14:43.039 --> 00:14:45.320 didn't expect to hear shit from them, let alone like 302 00:14:45.960 --> 00:14:49.159 two business days later, so you know, like you do, 303 00:14:49.559 --> 00:14:52.399 I have no discretion, And I tell everyone, oh my god, 304 00:14:52.399 --> 00:14:55.399 I got an interview. I'm so excited, told everyone that 305 00:14:55.399 --> 00:14:58.360 would listen. I was talking about how the education portion 306 00:14:58.440 --> 00:15:00.159 of this job was like right up my alley. The 307 00:15:00.240 --> 00:15:03.000 hours are great, still here at the same hospital. I 308 00:15:03.039 --> 00:15:05.720 don't have to go through onboarding again. Everything appealed to me. 309 00:15:06.039 --> 00:15:08.080 When I finally in land at the interview, I could 310 00:15:08.080 --> 00:15:10.279 not shut up about it. And then a few days 311 00:15:10.320 --> 00:15:13.320 into the non stop talking about this role, which I 312 00:15:13.360 --> 00:15:15.600 knew little, very little about at the time, I thought, 313 00:15:16.279 --> 00:15:18.279 what if I don't get it. What if I'm telling 314 00:15:18.399 --> 00:15:20.240 every person under the sun that I applied for this 315 00:15:20.320 --> 00:15:22.039 job and that I want to get the hell out 316 00:15:22.080 --> 00:15:25.600 of here, and then I don't get it. I'm always 317 00:15:25.639 --> 00:15:28.440 telling my friends, keep your shit close, brag once it's done. 318 00:15:28.679 --> 00:15:30.600 But I did not follow this role, not even for 319 00:15:30.639 --> 00:15:33.000 a minute. And it reminds me of a phrase that my. 320 00:15:33.000 --> 00:15:33.679 Dad used to say. 321 00:15:33.720 --> 00:15:35.639 He used to say, even a fish wouldn't get in 322 00:15:35.679 --> 00:15:37.919 trouble if it just kept its mouth shut. And I 323 00:15:37.960 --> 00:15:40.559 did not keep my mouth shut. And thank goodness, after 324 00:15:40.639 --> 00:15:45.159 two rounds of interviews and one kind of shadow day, 325 00:15:45.200 --> 00:15:49.200 I guess I'm warning in the clinic. I think it 326 00:15:49.320 --> 00:15:51.399 was really for all of them, so that they could 327 00:15:51.399 --> 00:15:53.200 meet me and see how I vibed with the team, 328 00:15:53.440 --> 00:15:57.879 got the job, they hired me. I had been told 329 00:15:58.360 --> 00:16:01.200 continuously throughout this process interviewing that this team was like 330 00:16:01.240 --> 00:16:04.120 really possessive of their culture and don't want some bad 331 00:16:04.159 --> 00:16:06.360 apple coming in and fucking up the friendly vibes in 332 00:16:06.399 --> 00:16:08.480 the room. And that made me want it even more. 333 00:16:09.000 --> 00:16:11.799 Are you kidding me? People who get along, there's no cattiness, 334 00:16:11.840 --> 00:16:15.200 there's no toxic nurses. They basically made me sound like 335 00:16:15.200 --> 00:16:18.000 they had been restructuring this particular department for years and 336 00:16:18.080 --> 00:16:19.840 they had finally got into a sweet spot where like 337 00:16:19.840 --> 00:16:22.679 everybody gets along, everybody does their role really well. And 338 00:16:22.720 --> 00:16:25.000 I thought, oh God, please, I want this so bad, 339 00:16:25.759 --> 00:16:27.840 so when they hired me, I would have agreed to anything, 340 00:16:27.879 --> 00:16:30.600 even a pay cut, which I was expecting a pay cut. 341 00:16:30.639 --> 00:16:32.960 You know, I don't love hospitals. I don't love healthcare 342 00:16:32.960 --> 00:16:35.639 as a business. But I am so glad they didn't 343 00:16:35.639 --> 00:16:38.000 cut my pay. They actually increased my pay a little bit, 344 00:16:38.080 --> 00:16:40.440 not tons, but it was enough to mean that my 345 00:16:40.600 --> 00:16:43.879 paychecks haven't really changed it all since, even bedside, even 346 00:16:43.919 --> 00:16:48.320 though when you stack up night shift weekend shift, in 347 00:16:48.399 --> 00:16:50.799 theory it's a little more, but it's kind of even doubt. 348 00:16:50.919 --> 00:16:54.360 So I'm really grateful. And on top of it, I'm 349 00:16:54.399 --> 00:16:57.519 not crying after every shift. My body doesn't hurt. It's 350 00:16:57.559 --> 00:17:01.120 just it's one of those things that those of you 351 00:17:01.720 --> 00:17:04.319 that still are working at the bedside getting ready for work. 352 00:17:04.319 --> 00:17:06.279 While you're listening to this, you're like, a, yeah, shut up, 353 00:17:06.279 --> 00:17:08.519 shut up. We still have to do the hard work. 354 00:17:09.000 --> 00:17:11.079 But after all those years, it's the change I needed 355 00:17:11.079 --> 00:17:13.799 to keep me from ditching nursing altogether. I've been at 356 00:17:13.799 --> 00:17:16.480 the bedside for a long time. My first hospital job 357 00:17:16.720 --> 00:17:19.920 was started in two thousand and five, and I've been 358 00:17:19.920 --> 00:17:26.119 continuously in hospitals ever since. I don't think that I 359 00:17:26.160 --> 00:17:30.720 wouldn't change my profession. I wouldn't change all those years 360 00:17:30.759 --> 00:17:34.720 that I've done. But man, I'm glad that challenge is over, 361 00:17:34.799 --> 00:17:37.480 because I was getting to a point where I was like, 362 00:17:37.519 --> 00:17:39.160 I don't know how I'm going to keep doing this. 363 00:17:39.359 --> 00:17:43.559 So there are two final topics I want to touch on. First. 364 00:17:43.960 --> 00:17:46.279 I'm going to say, just briefly, the providers with whom 365 00:17:46.319 --> 00:17:49.039 my work are wonderful. I've worked in hospitals and on 366 00:17:49.079 --> 00:17:51.559 teams and places where I've been yelled at, spoken to 367 00:17:51.680 --> 00:17:54.559 like I couldn't find my ass with both hands, and 368 00:17:55.319 --> 00:17:58.400 also treated like my very valid concerns for my sick 369 00:17:58.480 --> 00:18:03.079 patients were invalid. I've been talked to you in so 370 00:18:03.160 --> 00:18:07.359 many disrespectful ways by providers of all titles. During the 371 00:18:07.400 --> 00:18:09.359 last few months of me learning my new role, my 372 00:18:09.440 --> 00:18:12.759 providers have been happy to answer questions guide me, even 373 00:18:12.920 --> 00:18:15.799 when they are clearly overburdened with their own work. Their 374 00:18:15.839 --> 00:18:18.079 behavior illustrates to me that they do view us as 375 00:18:18.079 --> 00:18:19.759 a team, and I'm not just some underling that they 376 00:18:19.759 --> 00:18:22.960 can order around, which is really refreshing because I've had 377 00:18:22.960 --> 00:18:24.759 people basically say, do what I tell you to do 378 00:18:24.799 --> 00:18:27.119 and don't question it, when my job as a nurse 379 00:18:27.240 --> 00:18:30.400 is to question it make sure that everything is above 380 00:18:30.440 --> 00:18:31.720 board for my patients. 381 00:18:32.160 --> 00:18:33.839 So all of these providers that. 382 00:18:33.839 --> 00:18:36.279 I'm working with, I recognize my learning and becoming a 383 00:18:36.279 --> 00:18:39.960 strong clinical coordinator is vital to keeping this team as 384 00:18:40.000 --> 00:18:42.359 strong as it has been, and this is also important 385 00:18:42.400 --> 00:18:45.240 to the clinic growing which we are doing. It's a 386 00:18:45.279 --> 00:18:51.039 wonderful field with research and all sorts of stuff that 387 00:18:51.279 --> 00:18:53.920 I'm still learning about and would love to talk more 388 00:18:53.920 --> 00:18:56.799 about in the future as I can talk about them 389 00:18:56.839 --> 00:18:57.440 with some. 390 00:18:58.039 --> 00:18:59.079 Level of knowledge. 391 00:18:59.319 --> 00:19:02.680 The provider, the nurses, the medical assistance, the patient liaisons. 392 00:19:02.680 --> 00:19:04.720 This whole team is made up of people that I enjoy, 393 00:19:04.880 --> 00:19:07.519 and that is kind of miraculous in my mind because 394 00:19:07.559 --> 00:19:11.519 I think back to some of the bullies and lazy 395 00:19:11.839 --> 00:19:16.519 people and assholes and all of the various undesirables that 396 00:19:16.559 --> 00:19:20.359 I've come across in my almost twenty years in hospitals. 397 00:19:20.839 --> 00:19:22.759 This is chef's kiss. 398 00:19:23.160 --> 00:19:25.680 So all right, I'm gonna end this by talking about 399 00:19:25.680 --> 00:19:27.480 something that's been on my mind since the first day 400 00:19:27.519 --> 00:19:32.599 of training, and that is I don't want to talk 401 00:19:32.640 --> 00:19:35.279