WEBVTT 1 00:00:01.399 --> 00:00:04.000 Hi, everybody, Welcome to the Best Ever You Show. I'm 2 00:00:04.040 --> 00:00:07.639 Elizabeth here with doctor Katie Eastman, my co host, and 3 00:00:07.799 --> 00:00:09.320 our guest Bobby Carlton. 4 00:00:09.359 --> 00:00:12.320 Bobby, Hi, how are you Hi? Thanks for having me. 5 00:00:12.800 --> 00:00:13.839 Yeah, Katie, how are you? 6 00:00:15.119 --> 00:00:18.280 Good to see you, Bobby, good to be here. 7 00:00:18.559 --> 00:00:20.160 Good to be here. Yeah. Katie and I talk like 8 00:00:20.199 --> 00:00:22.920 every minute of the day. So good to see you again, Katie. 9 00:00:23.559 --> 00:00:29.120 Yeah, good to talk to you. 10 00:00:29.120 --> 00:00:32.560 You know, we are new to Riverside FM here and 11 00:00:32.640 --> 00:00:35.359 we're I'm having a little bit of a giggle before 12 00:00:35.359 --> 00:00:38.159 we go on here. Katie's like, oh my gosh, my lighting, 13 00:00:38.159 --> 00:00:40.679 and I'm like, oh my gosh, I'm I'm much shorter 14 00:00:40.759 --> 00:00:43.399 than you guys in the video, and Bobby's We're all 15 00:00:43.439 --> 00:00:48.479 talking about the really good video quality that we have here, 16 00:00:48.520 --> 00:00:52.200 showing every wrinkle and gray hair and every everything. 17 00:00:52.840 --> 00:00:54.960 I miss. Zoom touch up my appearance. 18 00:00:56.119 --> 00:01:00.200 Yes, that's what's missing. Okays, it don't look like this 19 00:01:00.320 --> 00:01:00.960 on Zoom. 20 00:01:01.320 --> 00:01:03.000 I know. Zoom is our friend. 21 00:01:03.719 --> 00:01:08.400 Is our frienduzzy fuzzy filter. Yeah. And my son for Christmas, 22 00:01:08.480 --> 00:01:10.200 He's like, Mom, I got you a new camera. It's 23 00:01:10.239 --> 00:01:13.120 like four K and blah blah blah. I'm like, oh great, 24 00:01:13.959 --> 00:01:18.319 thank you, thank you. Yeah the twist anyway, yeah, and 25 00:01:18.319 --> 00:01:22.319 we're all in our home offices. So yeah, so anyway, 26 00:01:22.359 --> 00:01:25.879 it's it's it's great to have you here, Bobby. What 27 00:01:25.920 --> 00:01:28.400 a treat it is. Bobby is the founder of Carlton 28 00:01:28.439 --> 00:01:33.120 PR and Marketing Innovation Innovation. I'm sorry, I want to 29 00:01:33.120 --> 00:01:35.159 say Innovation Women is what I want to say. 30 00:01:35.799 --> 00:01:36.159 Katie. 31 00:01:36.200 --> 00:01:38.560 You're a member and I'm a budding member. 32 00:01:38.319 --> 00:01:39.359 And I don't want to know all. 33 00:01:39.439 --> 00:01:41.359 I just want to give the Florida Bobby and have 34 00:01:41.400 --> 00:01:42.400 it tell us all about her. 35 00:01:43.640 --> 00:01:47.120 So Innovation Women is actually my third company. I usually 36 00:01:47.120 --> 00:01:50.879 tell people The day job is I run Carlton PR Marketing. 37 00:01:51.200 --> 00:01:53.959 That's how I make an actual living. The night job 38 00:01:54.120 --> 00:01:57.840 for many years was something called Mass Innovation Nights, which 39 00:01:57.920 --> 00:02:01.840 was a monthly new product launch event driven by social 40 00:02:01.879 --> 00:02:06.480 media help promote local startups. And then Innovation Women is 41 00:02:06.640 --> 00:02:09.919 the dream job. It's the dream of getting more women 42 00:02:10.520 --> 00:02:14.439 on stage at conferences and events because two thirds of 43 00:02:14.479 --> 00:02:18.400 all conference speakers are men, and it leaves women out 44 00:02:18.439 --> 00:02:21.080 of all kinds of business and career opportunities. 45 00:02:21.879 --> 00:02:23.879 It sure does. I just met you at the main 46 00:02:23.960 --> 00:02:28.120 conference for women actually, and you gave such a fascinating talk. 47 00:02:28.479 --> 00:02:31.319 Why is it that women aren't part of the speaking 48 00:02:31.360 --> 00:02:32.159 circuit so much. 49 00:02:33.000 --> 00:02:36.960 There's a lot of actual systemic reasons for that. One 50 00:02:37.000 --> 00:02:40.960 of them is speaking begets speaking. The more speaking you do, 51 00:02:41.240 --> 00:02:45.120 the more speaking you will do, and so older patterns 52 00:02:45.240 --> 00:02:48.479 kind of perpetuate. And if you're looking at this from 53 00:02:48.599 --> 00:02:53.599 an event manager perspective, they are asking for brand names, 54 00:02:53.800 --> 00:03:00.319 recognizable faces, people they know the heads of company is 55 00:03:00.360 --> 00:03:04.319 the c suite, and you know if you define who 56 00:03:04.360 --> 00:03:07.800 you want on your stage by the c suite from 57 00:03:07.919 --> 00:03:12.000 the Fortune five hundred, very small number of women there. 58 00:03:12.560 --> 00:03:15.759 But there's actually a lot of reasons. Even at the 59 00:03:15.879 --> 00:03:20.879 smaller company size, more women work part time, women are 60 00:03:20.919 --> 00:03:24.840 more likely to work for smaller companies, and women are 61 00:03:24.879 --> 00:03:28.400 still more likely to be responsible for kids and home. 62 00:03:29.120 --> 00:03:32.159 So if you get asked to speak, you know, it's 63 00:03:32.199 --> 00:03:34.840 hard to be the morning keynote speaker. If you've got 64 00:03:34.840 --> 00:03:37.759 to put little Johnny on the bus at eight am. 65 00:03:38.000 --> 00:03:41.759 It's hard to get away for three days, which is 66 00:03:42.240 --> 00:03:45.199 what it would take to travel to a conference to 67 00:03:45.319 --> 00:03:48.560 speak and then come back. If you only work three 68 00:03:48.680 --> 00:03:51.680 days a week, and if you work for a smaller company, 69 00:03:51.759 --> 00:03:55.719 that company probably can't afford to send you to a 70 00:03:55.800 --> 00:03:59.319 conference for three days. There's nobody to backfill for you, 71 00:03:59.680 --> 00:04:02.560 and they might not have the money for the travel 72 00:04:02.719 --> 00:04:04.680 and all the expenses. 73 00:04:04.080 --> 00:04:08.599 Associated with it. So systemic reasons included what do you think, Katie? 74 00:04:09.280 --> 00:04:09.879 I love it. 75 00:04:10.039 --> 00:04:13.879 I think I've gotten lots of leads from being part 76 00:04:13.960 --> 00:04:17.759 of Innovation Women for speaking options that I never would 77 00:04:17.800 --> 00:04:22.279 have found. I think Innovation Women has a wonderful opportunity 78 00:04:22.360 --> 00:04:26.000 for authors as well. You've got a section where we 79 00:04:26.079 --> 00:04:30.199 can identify ourselves as with our books, and there's also 80 00:04:30.279 --> 00:04:33.000 a place where we can reach out and announce and 81 00:04:33.079 --> 00:04:35.360 say what's on our minds and what we're thinking about, 82 00:04:35.399 --> 00:04:37.319 and hey, is there anybody out there who wants to 83 00:04:37.360 --> 00:04:41.519 talk about that? A lot of options Innovation Women offers, 84 00:04:41.560 --> 00:04:44.079 and I think just Bobby's brilliant and I think what 85 00:04:44.120 --> 00:04:48.079 she's done is huge, and I'm grateful, very grateful for 86 00:04:48.199 --> 00:04:50.439 somebody like me who was just how would I get 87 00:04:50.480 --> 00:04:50.920 out there? 88 00:04:52.000 --> 00:04:56.000 Yeah, I mean Innovation Women has a profile for each speaker, 89 00:04:56.240 --> 00:04:59.160 a searchable database for event managers to come in and 90 00:04:59.199 --> 00:05:03.600 search for speed. We also have a database of opportunities 91 00:05:03.959 --> 00:05:07.120 that our speakers can apply to we have the what 92 00:05:07.160 --> 00:05:09.759 we call the green Room, which is where all of 93 00:05:09.800 --> 00:05:13.720 our education is. And we have the Innovation Women Network, 94 00:05:14.079 --> 00:05:18.079 which is an online community so our speakers can network 95 00:05:18.120 --> 00:05:18.720 with each other. 96 00:05:18.839 --> 00:05:20.399 Tell me I'm going to go back. I'm taking you 97 00:05:20.439 --> 00:05:22.839 back to kindergarten like we do sometimes on this show. 98 00:05:23.519 --> 00:05:25.519 Were you you the kid who was always piping up 99 00:05:25.519 --> 00:05:26.720 and loved public speaking? 100 00:05:27.519 --> 00:05:32.560 No, I'm an introvert. Seriously, I'm an introvert. I think that. 101 00:05:34.360 --> 00:05:38.480 The skill set for somebody in my position, so longtime 102 00:05:38.519 --> 00:05:42.120 pr person. I'm really good at research, I'm really good 103 00:05:42.120 --> 00:05:46.720 at writing. Are these are my superpowers? And public speaking 104 00:05:46.879 --> 00:05:49.839 was something that I did with other people. I got 105 00:05:50.000 --> 00:05:53.560 them on stage. I continue to do that. I always 106 00:05:53.560 --> 00:05:56.680 tell people I'm one of the theater kids, you know, 107 00:05:56.920 --> 00:06:00.839 like always out there. But my job in the theater 108 00:06:01.160 --> 00:06:03.399 was I was the spotlight operator. 109 00:06:03.560 --> 00:06:04.079 I was the. 110 00:06:04.040 --> 00:06:07.319 Person who was hiding out in the rafters shining a 111 00:06:07.439 --> 00:06:11.279 spotlight on the star of the show. I was not 112 00:06:11.759 --> 00:06:14.160 the singing and dancing on the stage kind of person. 113 00:06:14.360 --> 00:06:18.199 And I discovered when I started my second company that 114 00:06:18.560 --> 00:06:22.199 I needed to be front and center in order to 115 00:06:22.319 --> 00:06:25.120 connect with customers and partners. 116 00:06:25.879 --> 00:06:27.040 I needed to be. 117 00:06:28.800 --> 00:06:32.160 The theater kid on the stage versus the one in 118 00:06:32.199 --> 00:06:35.040 the back room in order to move my business forward. 119 00:06:35.199 --> 00:06:38.800 And the first event that we did for Innovation Nights, 120 00:06:39.680 --> 00:06:45.040 I was awful. I mean seriously hot mess. And it 121 00:06:45.199 --> 00:06:49.120 was a social media powered event and everybody had their 122 00:06:49.240 --> 00:06:54.439 cameras out and video lots of evidence of me being 123 00:06:54.439 --> 00:06:57.399 a hot mess. So it was a situation where you 124 00:06:57.439 --> 00:06:59.720 look at those pictures, you look at that video, and 125 00:06:59.759 --> 00:07:03.000 you say, I get better at this or I die. 126 00:07:04.160 --> 00:07:07.399 And I chose to get better. Practice really helps. 127 00:07:07.639 --> 00:07:10.040 Here's a question. How do you get the practice though? 128 00:07:10.079 --> 00:07:11.560 If nobody puts you on their. 129 00:07:11.399 --> 00:07:15.639 Stage, Sometimes you got to make your own stage, which 130 00:07:15.680 --> 00:07:18.199 is really what I did with Innovation Nights. I ran 131 00:07:18.319 --> 00:07:22.879 Innovation Nights actively for eleven years. We had a monthly event, 132 00:07:23.000 --> 00:07:27.199 undured in thirty five events, and every single month I 133 00:07:27.519 --> 00:07:30.959 was the MC, I was the host, and I was 134 00:07:31.079 --> 00:07:34.879 literally doing the same thing every single month. And as 135 00:07:35.000 --> 00:07:38.439 I did it again and again and again, I got 136 00:07:38.480 --> 00:07:44.079 better at it, and pretty soon people were asking me, oh, 137 00:07:44.360 --> 00:07:48.000 can you come and speak at my event? Really me, 138 00:07:48.800 --> 00:07:50.560 And then you know, it kind of dawned on me, 139 00:07:50.680 --> 00:07:53.480 Oh you've gotten better at what you were doing. People 140 00:07:53.600 --> 00:07:56.160 do want you to speak? I think some of it 141 00:07:56.279 --> 00:08:00.120 for many people. If you can't create your own stages, yes, 142 00:08:01.120 --> 00:08:04.439 you can start smaller. One of the recommendations I usually 143 00:08:04.480 --> 00:08:08.319 give to people is, if you need that dip your 144 00:08:08.439 --> 00:08:13.639 toe in opportunity, ask a question from the audience that 145 00:08:13.759 --> 00:08:17.519 the next conference that you're at. If you think about it, 146 00:08:17.560 --> 00:08:21.040 you're probably talking to the exact same audience that the 147 00:08:21.120 --> 00:08:25.120 people on stage were speaking to. And you've got a short, 148 00:08:25.399 --> 00:08:31.079 little punctuation of a moment. You get to identify yourself, 149 00:08:31.120 --> 00:08:34.600 this is my company, ask my question, and then you 150 00:08:34.639 --> 00:08:38.519 can sit down and disappear into the audience. But you 151 00:08:38.759 --> 00:08:41.200 just spoke to the exact same audience that the folks 152 00:08:41.279 --> 00:08:42.240 on stage spoke to. 153 00:08:42.480 --> 00:08:44.879 Yeh, it's your turnd way to start. 154 00:08:47.360 --> 00:08:49.480 Well, I'm Bobby, I'm the theater kid who is on 155 00:08:49.559 --> 00:08:53.879 stage and more power to have given. Yeah, And you have 156 00:08:54.039 --> 00:08:57.720 given me a stage that I would not have otherwise had, 157 00:08:58.240 --> 00:09:01.879 And I'm most grateful for that because I'm one of 158 00:09:01.919 --> 00:09:05.879 those people who doesn't shy away from being a speaker, 159 00:09:06.279 --> 00:09:09.440 loves it, eats it up. But just how do I 160 00:09:09.480 --> 00:09:13.399 get there? So I really encourage people to become part 161 00:09:13.480 --> 00:09:16.639 of innovation women because it gives you your stage. It 162 00:09:16.720 --> 00:09:18.919 helps you find your stage where you fit. 163 00:09:20.320 --> 00:09:23.320 We also do a thing called speaker Friend Fridays, a 164 00:09:23.440 --> 00:09:26.519 zoom call every week and for a lot of people 165 00:09:26.919 --> 00:09:30.159 I know they've said that for them, that was their 166 00:09:30.200 --> 00:09:37.200 first stage, introducing themselves, asking a question, answering someone else's question. 167 00:09:37.960 --> 00:09:41.159 It's all virtual, it's online, but it's good practice. 168 00:09:41.879 --> 00:09:46.440 Yeah, great practice. I'm not the theater kid. I'm probably 169 00:09:46.480 --> 00:09:50.559 more the math and science and writing girl, behind the 170 00:09:50.600 --> 00:09:53.879 scenes of like never on stage kind of thing. But 171 00:09:54.039 --> 00:09:56.639 then I had a TV bug when I was about 172 00:09:56.879 --> 00:09:59.720 eighteen and wanted to be a news anchor and so 173 00:09:59.759 --> 00:10:03.279 my whole backgrounds in the news anchoring and and so 174 00:10:03.440 --> 00:10:06.559 forth industry, So TV reporting and anchoring and stuff like that, 175 00:10:06.600 --> 00:10:10.279 but not theater exactly. But yeah, now it's interesting, so 176 00:10:10.360 --> 00:10:14.559 different backgrounds. Is there a Is there a certain something 177 00:10:14.600 --> 00:10:18.840 that you look for in people to be on stage? 178 00:10:19.200 --> 00:10:22.679 Do you have like if somebody's listening and they're like, Bobby, 179 00:10:22.879 --> 00:10:24.840 I need you, I've got to track you down because 180 00:10:24.919 --> 00:10:27.360 I want to be the keynote of blah blah blah, 181 00:10:27.480 --> 00:10:30.159 or I want to give the commencement address. You know, 182 00:10:30.279 --> 00:10:32.759 something big that they want to do. Do you have 183 00:10:32.840 --> 00:10:35.240 a series of things that you're looking for? 184 00:10:36.480 --> 00:10:40.360 So that's happen and Women is a platform, It's a 185 00:10:40.399 --> 00:10:45.519 membership group, and what we do is we provide the 186 00:10:45.600 --> 00:10:50.240 services from Innovation Women's Platform to anybody if people are 187 00:10:51.000 --> 00:10:53.919 looking for a way to get more visibility, if they're 188 00:10:53.960 --> 00:10:56.399 looking for a way to build their business, or a 189 00:10:56.480 --> 00:11:00.039 great opportunity for that. The things that I love, I 190 00:11:00.120 --> 00:11:03.519 love to see kind of walking through the door are 191 00:11:04.039 --> 00:11:09.120 people who may be very experienced in business, who may 192 00:11:09.200 --> 00:11:13.399 not have yet utilized all of their vast knowledge. 193 00:11:13.879 --> 00:11:17.000 From the stage. So I think a lot. 194 00:11:16.799 --> 00:11:20.720 Of people wait too long before they say I am 195 00:11:21.000 --> 00:11:24.600 ready to be a speaker. I am ready to present 196 00:11:24.840 --> 00:11:25.600 at an event. 197 00:11:26.240 --> 00:11:27.279 We have a lot of. 198 00:11:27.200 --> 00:11:32.000 Women who talk to me about these amazing things that 199 00:11:32.039 --> 00:11:34.919 they have done, and I'm like, why are you not 200 00:11:35.120 --> 00:11:38.720 out there speaking about these It's like I have climbed 201 00:11:39.399 --> 00:11:42.960 this mountain, I have done this amazing thing, and I'm like, 202 00:11:43.120 --> 00:11:43.679 why are. 203 00:11:43.559 --> 00:11:47.440 You not telling that story? Well, I want to build 204 00:11:47.600 --> 00:11:49.720 my confidence first. 205 00:11:49.840 --> 00:11:52.720 I'm like, you know what builds confidence like nothing else, 206 00:11:53.360 --> 00:11:57.159 Getting up on stage and telling your story like that is. 207 00:11:57.120 --> 00:11:58.480 The way to get started. 208 00:11:58.759 --> 00:12:01.799 It's because we fear we're going to be judged how 209 00:12:02.080 --> 00:12:04.919 how what's our weight, what's our hair? What do we 210 00:12:04.960 --> 00:12:06.159 look like? How old are we? 211 00:12:06.360 --> 00:12:06.440 Is? 212 00:12:06.480 --> 00:12:09.960 Everything we're saying perfect is. It's a it's a probably 213 00:12:10.039 --> 00:12:14.279 a processing of self confidence issues going on most of 214 00:12:14.320 --> 00:12:16.919 the time. I think when I talk to people and 215 00:12:16.960 --> 00:12:18.879 they're like, I don't want to do that. People are 216 00:12:19.000 --> 00:12:19.679 gonna see. 217 00:12:19.519 --> 00:12:24.919 Me, you know, I got to say that. You know, 218 00:12:24.960 --> 00:12:26.960 if anybody had a reason to be nervous, it would 219 00:12:27.000 --> 00:12:30.519 be me. But at the same time, I do think 220 00:12:30.600 --> 00:12:34.720 that people we've been told all our lives that speaking 221 00:12:34.799 --> 00:12:37.600 is something to be fearful of. Like there are all 222 00:12:37.639 --> 00:12:42.200 these studies about how speaking is the number one fear. 223 00:12:42.679 --> 00:12:46.399 I think death is like number seven. In other words, 224 00:12:46.440 --> 00:12:50.399 we would rather die than be on stage. But I 225 00:12:50.399 --> 00:12:52.799 think so many of us have heard these stories and 226 00:12:52.840 --> 00:12:55.519 heard about the study that were like, this is something 227 00:12:55.559 --> 00:12:59.279 we're supposed to be nervous about. This is something we're 228 00:12:59.360 --> 00:13:02.840 supposed to be frightened of. And I think we've built 229 00:13:03.000 --> 00:13:07.080 up this fear in our minds to an unreasonable level. 230 00:13:07.720 --> 00:13:11.759 So I don't really like to talk about the fear 231 00:13:11.919 --> 00:13:15.559 aspect of public speaking. I think if you do feel 232 00:13:16.080 --> 00:13:19.679 flushed if you feel a little flutter in the tammy, 233 00:13:20.240 --> 00:13:24.440 like that's excitement, that's not necessarily nervousness. 234 00:13:24.759 --> 00:13:30.399 I absolutely love what you did in Maine or anybody 235 00:13:30.440 --> 00:13:33.919 that has ever not been on stage or had a 236 00:13:34.039 --> 00:13:38.840 fear of being on stage. You gave everybody equal opportunity 237 00:13:38.879 --> 00:13:41.159 to be up there and just see what it feels 238 00:13:41.320 --> 00:13:44.600 like to be on the stage under the lights and 239 00:13:44.679 --> 00:13:48.679 shine their light upon each other. It was such a 240 00:13:48.720 --> 00:13:52.399 special moment in my life. It was just so I 241 00:13:52.440 --> 00:13:54.759 don't know, there's just something about him, like it was 242 00:13:54.799 --> 00:13:57.399 like one of those, as Katie will say, uplifting other 243 00:13:57.440 --> 00:14:02.120 women moments. It was so powerful. I think about it 244 00:14:02.159 --> 00:14:02.679 all the time. 245 00:14:03.759 --> 00:14:04.480 That's awesome. 246 00:14:04.919 --> 00:14:08.080 I've done that a couple of times before, and I 247 00:14:08.120 --> 00:14:13.600 first did it out at the I Tripoli International Leadership 248 00:14:13.639 --> 00:14:18.799 Conference in California several years ago, and it was one 249 00:14:18.840 --> 00:14:22.080 of the last sessions. We didn't have the entire I 250 00:14:22.120 --> 00:14:26.279 don't know, seven thousand people audience there, and I'm like, 251 00:14:26.279 --> 00:14:30.840 all right, anybody who's left here who hasn't yet been 252 00:14:30.960 --> 00:14:34.639 on stage, you want it, come on up. And I 253 00:14:34.720 --> 00:14:37.200 think somebody's about ready to kill me because they were 254 00:14:37.240 --> 00:14:42.399 nervous about the whole stage collapsing. But we got literally 255 00:14:42.720 --> 00:14:45.799 hundreds of people on stage for a big group photo 256 00:14:46.399 --> 00:14:47.919 and people are like, you know what, this is the 257 00:14:47.919 --> 00:14:50.879 first time I've been on stage, and that I think 258 00:14:51.080 --> 00:14:53.480 was like a really good way for some people to 259 00:14:53.519 --> 00:14:56.919 go this is not this is not scary, this is fun. 260 00:14:57.000 --> 00:14:59.320 I'm here with my friends. It was good. 261 00:15:00.080 --> 00:15:02.320 It was just fabulous. Yeah, Katie. 262 00:15:03.000 --> 00:15:05.840 And don't you think Bobby that one of the things 263 00:15:06.000 --> 00:15:08.879 that helps people not be as anxious is if they 264 00:15:08.960 --> 00:15:13.200 pick a topic that fits for them, because I think 265 00:15:13.240 --> 00:15:16.600 that is hugely important. And one of the things I 266 00:15:16.679 --> 00:15:20.960 love about when we get leads on Innovation Women is 267 00:15:21.120 --> 00:15:24.519 we tell you what our loves are, our passions, what 268 00:15:24.559 --> 00:15:26.879 we want to speak about, and the leads come to 269 00:15:27.000 --> 00:15:29.519 us based on those themes. And I think it's so 270 00:15:29.720 --> 00:15:33.879 much easier to get up on any stage. Just like 271 00:15:33.919 --> 00:15:36.879 an actress, you know, you've got to be in character, 272 00:15:37.919 --> 00:15:40.039 and you've got to know your character. Well, we have 273 00:15:40.120 --> 00:15:43.639 to know ourselves to know what we're good at speaking about, 274 00:15:43.759 --> 00:15:45.279 and it's what we care about. 275 00:15:45.440 --> 00:15:48.120 A lot of people to think about public speaking as 276 00:15:48.279 --> 00:15:51.559 I'm going to share my area of expertise, but you 277 00:15:51.720 --> 00:15:54.480 also have to be sharing the things that get you 278 00:15:54.600 --> 00:15:58.879 excited that you're passionate about. It's very hard for the 279 00:15:59.000 --> 00:16:03.000 audience to get excited about something if you're not excited 280 00:16:03.039 --> 00:16:06.879 as this speaker, right, So you have to be excited 281 00:16:06.879 --> 00:16:07.879 about your topic. 282 00:16:08.000 --> 00:16:12.919 You have to love that topic, right. Yeah. 283 00:16:13.200 --> 00:16:15.159 I have an opportunity to speak at the end of 284 00:16:15.159 --> 00:16:17.639 the month in front of a really big group of 285 00:16:17.639 --> 00:16:20.440 student athletes, which is a huge goal of mine forever. 286 00:16:22.039 --> 00:16:24.360 You're one of the reasons why. Yeah, I know. One 287 00:16:24.399 --> 00:16:26.080 of the reasons why I had you on the show 288 00:16:26.200 --> 00:16:29.600 is because it just credits back to that moment of 289 00:16:29.639 --> 00:16:31.639 like being on the stage and having that moment you know, 290 00:16:31.679 --> 00:16:34.000 I got this, I can do this kind of thing. 291 00:16:34.039 --> 00:16:36.879 And so I said yes, and I'm like, oh, what 292 00:16:36.919 --> 00:16:39.639 did I say yes to? No kind of thing? I 293 00:16:39.720 --> 00:16:41.759 had one of those moments of like a no, and 294 00:16:42.200 --> 00:16:44.159 everybody knows it, and I'm cool with it. You know, 295 00:16:44.240 --> 00:16:46.759 it's not my it's not exactly my thing. You know, 296 00:16:47.159 --> 00:16:50.399 I'm more behind the TV kind of thing. I'm like, Okay, 297 00:16:50.440 --> 00:16:52.720 I can do this. So I had the most wonderful 298 00:16:52.799 --> 00:16:57.039 preparatory phone call yesterday to get everybody's ducks in a 299 00:16:57.080 --> 00:16:59.279 row because I'm sharing the stage with Ed Garrity and 300 00:16:59.320 --> 00:17:01.919 I'm like, oh my, you know kind of thing. So 301 00:17:02.159 --> 00:17:05.039 it's a really big deal. And I just thank you, Bobby, 302 00:17:05.079 --> 00:17:07.759 because that I think without that moment, I might have said, no, 303 00:17:08.599 --> 00:17:09.000 I am. 304 00:17:09.160 --> 00:17:12.720 I worked with a speaker a while ago, who, like 305 00:17:12.880 --> 00:17:15.440 many of us, spent several years, you know, in the 306 00:17:15.480 --> 00:17:18.559 early days of the pandemic and stuff, being alone at 307 00:17:18.559 --> 00:17:22.480 home and doing lots virtually yea, and she said she 308 00:17:22.599 --> 00:17:28.000 really felt like she lost the muscle, the memory of 309 00:17:28.079 --> 00:17:32.160 being on stage in front of real humans. And we 310 00:17:32.279 --> 00:17:35.119 got her an opportunity to be on stage at a 311 00:17:35.160 --> 00:17:37.759 pretty major event, and she got up during the dress 312 00:17:37.759 --> 00:17:41.519 rehearsal and just froze. And I was like, yeah, come here, 313 00:17:41.759 --> 00:17:44.920 we're going to go and find all the empty rooms 314 00:17:45.079 --> 00:17:47.880 at this conference, and you're going to hop up on 315 00:17:47.960 --> 00:17:51.400 that stage and you're going to give that presentation to me. 316 00:17:51.680 --> 00:17:54.480 And we probably bopped in and out of, you know, 317 00:17:55.119 --> 00:17:58.039 five to ten different rooms over the course. 318 00:17:58.119 --> 00:17:58.640 Of a day. 319 00:17:59.160 --> 00:18:01.079 And at the end of the day, she got up 320 00:18:01.119 --> 00:18:04.920 and she nailed that presentation. She was so good, and 321 00:18:04.960 --> 00:18:07.599 it was literally just you know, the muscle memory of 322 00:18:07.680 --> 00:18:09.519 being on stage it came back. 323 00:18:10.319 --> 00:18:10.599 Yeah. 324 00:18:10.599 --> 00:18:13.359 But you know, also the love and support of you. 325 00:18:13.680 --> 00:18:16.440 I think there's a when you meet Bobby in person, 326 00:18:16.599 --> 00:18:18.839 which I hope you all have the moment too. There's 327 00:18:18.880 --> 00:18:22.680 a warmth to you that I have trouble putting words to. 328 00:18:22.799 --> 00:18:25.480 I immediately didn't. Katie immediately called you, and I'm like, 329 00:18:25.519 --> 00:18:28.920 oh my god, I'm at the coolest person. Yeah. Yeah, 330 00:18:29.359 --> 00:18:32.599 she's so warm because you could be like, eh, I 331 00:18:32.640 --> 00:18:34.960 don't have time for you, you know, you know kind 332 00:18:34.960 --> 00:18:37.799 of thing, and I was scared at first. I'm like, oh, please, 333 00:18:37.799 --> 00:18:41.039 don't do that to me because I kind of love you, you know. 334 00:18:41.599 --> 00:18:43.920 And so I got the love back and it was 335 00:18:43.960 --> 00:18:47.880 so lovely. It just was just warm and friendly, and 336 00:18:47.960 --> 00:18:52.599 I watched you operate and you did that with everybody 337 00:18:52.640 --> 00:18:53.720 and it was refreshing. 338 00:18:54.240 --> 00:18:54.440 You know. 339 00:18:54.640 --> 00:18:58.799 It was interesting because I did my presentation that day twice, 340 00:18:59.200 --> 00:19:02.680 so I think I met you upstairs while we were 341 00:19:02.720 --> 00:19:06.400 in giving the presentation in the smaller room in the morning. 342 00:19:06.720 --> 00:19:09.960 You had a booth up like right outside our room, 343 00:19:10.079 --> 00:19:13.200 and then they had me do the same presentation in 344 00:19:13.279 --> 00:19:17.680 the big auditorium downstairs later on in the day and 345 00:19:17.960 --> 00:19:21.359 the first room. Okay, let's put a whole bunch of 346 00:19:21.400 --> 00:19:24.720 women in their fees pack them tight in a little 347 00:19:24.759 --> 00:19:28.200 tiny room and make it super hot. 348 00:19:28.559 --> 00:19:33.519 Like everybody's dying. It was so hot in that room, 349 00:19:33.839 --> 00:19:37.839 and everybody's like, we open a window, is there ac 350 00:19:38.680 --> 00:19:39.079 I'm like. 351 00:19:39.680 --> 00:19:42.039 Who's having a hot flash? But but we had a 352 00:19:42.039 --> 00:19:44.160 good time in that room, like it was. It was 353 00:19:44.279 --> 00:19:47.359 you know, a lot of laughing and interaction and stuff. 354 00:19:47.400 --> 00:19:50.599 And then I got into the auditorium to do the 355 00:19:50.640 --> 00:19:56.119 same presentation in the afternoon, and everybody spread out in 356 00:19:56.200 --> 00:19:59.119 the auditorium and there's like three hundred seats and I've 357 00:19:59.119 --> 00:20:02.599 got about twenty people in the auditorium. And I should 358 00:20:02.680 --> 00:20:07.319 have like said, Okay, come closer, because otherwise you don't 359 00:20:07.359 --> 00:20:11.599 get that the feels, you don't get that interaction. And 360 00:20:12.960 --> 00:20:17.680 the minute I started doing my presentation, I'm like, I'm 361 00:20:17.720 --> 00:20:23.839 not feeling it. I'm not feeling the usual feels. And 362 00:20:23.920 --> 00:20:25.480 I said, you know what I'm going to have to do. 363 00:20:25.559 --> 00:20:27.599 I'm going to have to get everybody up here with me, 364 00:20:27.759 --> 00:20:31.359 because otherwise the feels are not going to be the 365 00:20:31.480 --> 00:20:35.440 same and it's not going to be the same experience 366 00:20:36.200 --> 00:20:40.000 for people who were in the little room this morning. Now, true, 367 00:20:40.079 --> 00:20:43.279 we were all dying to the heat, but the feels 368 00:20:43.279 --> 00:20:46.119 were there and the fields are so important to this. 369 00:20:47.440 --> 00:20:49.680 Yeah, they are. I was sitting it with a lot 370 00:20:49.680 --> 00:20:51.359 of I was actually sitting around a lot of people 371 00:20:51.960 --> 00:20:55.359 and they were taking intense notes while you were speaking. 372 00:20:55.440 --> 00:20:58.279 I think you had a really studious want to be 373 00:20:58.440 --> 00:21:02.720 crowd and it was I could see people, you know, like, 374 00:21:02.839 --> 00:21:05.279 how do I become this? That was the group that 375 00:21:05.319 --> 00:21:07.759 you had there. It was a last and the second 376 00:21:07.759 --> 00:21:09.880 one that they were younger and they were taking notes, 377 00:21:09.920 --> 00:21:11.759 and I felt like I was the old person in 378 00:21:11.799 --> 00:21:14.400 the room. I'm like, oh, my kind of thing, and 379 00:21:14.480 --> 00:21:16.480 it was. It was pretty cute. And when you brought 380 00:21:16.559 --> 00:21:19.720 up everybody on stage, everybody was tickled so and talked 381 00:21:19.720 --> 00:21:21.839 about it the rest of the day and everything. 382 00:21:21.880 --> 00:21:24.480 So it was, yeah, we great picture. 383 00:21:25.160 --> 00:21:26.200 Yeah, it was really cool. 384 00:21:26.519 --> 00:21:28.799 We got a fantastic picture of that. We got a 385 00:21:28.799 --> 00:21:31.279 great video of that, and we shared it out when 386 00:21:31.319 --> 00:21:31.920 people are. 387 00:21:31.759 --> 00:21:34.960 Like, yeah, so much fun. All right, So we're gonna 388 00:21:35.000 --> 00:21:36.720 run short on time, but I don't want to keep 389 00:21:36.720 --> 00:21:39.240 you too long here. But why do we need speaker. 390 00:21:38.960 --> 00:21:44.319 Buddies speaker friends. I'm a big advocate of speaker friends, 391 00:21:44.400 --> 00:21:50.160 all right. The reason we need speaker friends is very Weirdly, 392 00:21:50.519 --> 00:21:55.640 speaking as an industry, I swear to God, is so secretive. 393 00:21:57.160 --> 00:22:00.400 I feel like everybody who has ever stepped foot on 394 00:22:00.440 --> 00:22:03.319 stage looks around and goes, hey, I could do this. 395 00:22:04.079 --> 00:22:07.759 I could make money training other people to do this. 396 00:22:07.880 --> 00:22:11.480 So I'm gonna keep my little secrets to myself and 397 00:22:11.519 --> 00:22:15.000 I'm not going to share. And that doesn't help anybody else. 398 00:22:16.599 --> 00:22:19.319 And I don't know that that's how everybody operates, but 399 00:22:19.400 --> 00:22:23.559 I do feel like speaking as an industry is overly secretive. 400 00:22:23.799 --> 00:22:28.880 So I think the people who are most successful as 401 00:22:28.960 --> 00:22:35.799