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Speaker 1: The man who went too far by E. F. Benson,

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The little villages and Faith's nestles in a hollow of

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wooded hill up on the north bank of the River

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Fawn in the County of Hampshire, huddling close round its

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gray Norman church, as if for spiritual protection against the

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fays and fairies, the trolls and little people who might

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be supposed still to linger in the vast empty spaces

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of the new forest, and to calm after dusk and

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do their doubtful businesses. Once outside the hamlet, you may

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walk in any direction, so long as you avoid the

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high road which leads to Brockenhast, for the length of

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a summer afternoon, without seeing sign of human habitation, or

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possibly even catching sight of another human being. Shaggy wild

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ponies may stop their feeding for a moment as you pass.

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The white scuts of rabbits will vanish into their burrows.

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A brown viper perhaps will glide from your path into

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a clump of heather, and unseen birds will chuckle in

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the bushes. But it may easily happen that for a

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long day you will see nothing human, but you will

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not feel in the least lonely in summer at any rate,

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the sunlight will be gay with butterflies, and the air

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thick with all those woodland sounds, which, like instruments in

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an orchestra, combine to play the great symphony of the

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yearly festival of June. Winds whisper in the birches and

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sigh among the firs. Bees are busy with their redolent

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labor among the heather. A myriad bird's chirp in the

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green temples of the forest trees, and the voice of

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the river, prackling over stony places, bubbling into pools, chuckling

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and gulping round corners, gives you the sense that many

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presences and companions are near at hand. Yet oddly enough, though,

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one would have thought that these benign and cheerful influences

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of wholesome air and spaciousness of forest were very healthful

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comrades for a man, in so far as nature can

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really influence this wonderful human genus, which has in these

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centuries learned to defy her most violent storms in its

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well established houses, to bridle her torrents and make them

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lighted streets, to tunnel her mountains, and plow her seas.

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The inhabitants of Saint Faith's will not willingly venture into

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the forest after dark. For in spite of the silence

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and loneliness of the hooded night, it seems that man

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is not sure in what company he may suddenly find himself.

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And though it is difficult to get from these villages

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any very clear story of occult appearances, the feeling is widespread.

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One story, indeed, I have heard, with some definiteness, the

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tale of a monstrous goat that has been seen to

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skip with hellish glee about at the woods and shady places.

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And this perhaps is connected with the story which I

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have here attempted to piece together. It too, is well

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known to them. For all, remember the young artist who

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died here not long ago. A young man or so,

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he struck, the beholder of great personal beauty, with something

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about him that made men's faces to smile and brighten

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when they looked on him. His ghost, they will tell you,

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walks constantly by the stream and through the woods which

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he loved so, And in especial it haunts a certain house,

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the last of the village, where he lived, and its

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garden in which he was done to death. For my part,

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I am inclined to think that the terror of the

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forest dates chiefly from that day. So such as the

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story is, I have set it forth in connected form.

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It is based partly on the accounts of the villagers,

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but mainly on that of Darcy, a friend of mine

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and a friend of the man with whom these events

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were chiefly concerned. The day had been one of untarnished

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midsummer splendor, and as the sun drew near to its setting,

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the glory of the evening grew every moment more crystalline,

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more miraculous. Westward from Saint Faith's, the beech wood, which

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stretched for some miles toward the heathery upland beyond, already

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cast its veil of clear shadow over the red roofs

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of the village, But the spire of the gray Church,

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over topping all still pointed a flaming orange finger into

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the sky. The river Fawn, which runs below, lay in

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sheets of sky reflected blue, and wound its dreamy, devious

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course round the edge of this wood, where a rough

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two planked bridge crossed from the bottom of the garden

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of the last house in the village, and communicated by

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means of a little wicker gate with the wood itself. Then,

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once out of the shadow of the wood, the stream

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lay in flaming pools of the molten crimson of the sunset,

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and lost itself in the haze of woodland distances. This house,

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at the end of the village, stood outside the shadow,

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as the lawn, which sloped down to the river, was

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still flecked with sunlight. Garden beds of dazzling color lined

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its gravel walks, and down the middle of it ran

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a brick pergola, half hidden in clusters of rambler rows

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and purple with starry clematis. At the bottom end of it,

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between two of its pillars was slung a hammock containing

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a shirt sleeved figure. The house itself lay somewhat remote

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from the rest of the village, and a footpath leading

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across two fields, now tall and fragrant with hay, was

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its only communication with the high road. It was low,

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built only to stories in height, and like the garden,

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its walls were a mass of flowering roses. A narrow

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stone terrace ran along the garden front, over which was

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stretched an awning and on the terrace a young, silent

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footed man servant was busied with the laying of the

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table for dinner. He was neat handed and quick with

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his job, and having finished it, he went back into

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the house and reappeared again with a large, rough bath

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towel on his arm. With this he went to the

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hammock in the pergola nearly hat. Sir, he said, there's

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mister Darcy come here, asked a voice from the hammock. No, sir,

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if I'm not back when he comes, tell him I'm

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just having a bathe before dinner. The servant went back

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to the house, and after a moment or two, Frank

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Halton struggled to a sitting posture and slipped out on

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to the grass. He was of medium height and rather

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slender in build, but the supple, ease and grace of

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his movements gave the impression of great physical strength. Even

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his descent from the hammock was not an awkward performance.

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His face and hands were of very dark complexion, either

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from constant exposure to wind and sun, or as his

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black hair and dark eyes tended to show from some

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strain of southern blood. His head was small, his face

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of an exquisite beauty of modeling, while the smoothness of

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its contour would have led you to believe that he

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was a beardless lad still in his deens, But something

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some look which living and experience alone can give, seemed

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to contradict that, and finding yourself completely puzzled as to

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his age, he would next moment probably cease to think

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about that and only look at this glorious specimen of

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young manhood with wondering satisfaction. He was dressed as became

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the season and the heat, and wore only a shirt

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open at the neck and a pair of flannel trousers.

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His head, covered very thickly with a somewhat rebellious crop

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of short, curly hair, was bare as he strolled across

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the lawn to the bathing place that lay below. Then

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for a moment there was silence, then the sound of

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splashed and defied waters, and presently after a great shout

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of ecstatic joy as he swam up stream, with the

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foamed water standing in a frill round his neck. Then,

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after some five minutes of limb stretching struggle with the flood,

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he turned over on his back and with arms thrown wide,

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floated down stream, ripple cradled and inert. His eyes were

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shut and between half parted lips, he talked gently to himself.

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I am one with it, he said to himself. The

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river and I. I and the river, the coolness and

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splash of it is I. And the water herbs that

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wave in it are I also. And my strength and

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my limbs are not mine but the rivers. It is

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all one, all one, dear fawn. A quarter of an

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hour later he appeared again at the bottom of the lawn,

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dressed as before, his wet hair already drying into its crisp,

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short curls. Again there he paused a moment, looking back

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at the stream with the smile with which men look

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on the face of a friend. Then he turned towards

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the house. Simultaneously, his servant came to the door leading

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on to the terrace, followed by a man who appeared

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to be some half way through the fourth decade of

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his years. Frank and he saw each other across the

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bushes and garden beds, and each quickening his step, they

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met suddenly face to face round an angle of the

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garden walk in the fragrance of Syringa. My dear Darcy,

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cried Frank, I am charmed to see you, But the

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other stared at him in amazement. Frank, he exclaimed, Yes,

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that is my name, he said, laughing, What is the matter.

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Darcy took his hand. What have you done to yourself?

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He asked, you're a boy again. Ah, I have a

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lot to tell you, said Frank, Lots that you will

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hardly believe, but I shall convince you. He broke off

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suddenly and held up his hand. Hush, there is my nightingale,

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he said. The smile of recognition and welcome with which

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he had greeted his friend faded from his face, and

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a look of rapt wonder took its place, as of

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a lover listening to the voice of his beloved. His

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mouth parted slightly, showing the white line of his teeth,

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and his eyes looked out and out till they seemed

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to Darcy to be focused on things beyond the vision

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of man. Then something perhaps startled the bird, for the

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song ceased. Yes, not to tell you, he said, really,

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I am delighted to see you, but you look rather

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white and pulled down. No wonder after that fever, And

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there is to be no nonsense about this visit. It

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is June. Now you stop here till you are fit

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to begin work. Again two months at least. Oh, but

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I can't trespass quite to that extent. Frank took his

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arm and walked him down the grass. Trespas who talks

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of trespass? I shall tell you quite openly when I

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am tired of you. But you know, when we had

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the studio together, we used not to bore each other. However,

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it's ill talking of going away on the moment of

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your arrival. Just a stroll to the river and then

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it will be dinner time. Darcy took out his cigarette

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case and offered it to the other. Frank laughed, No,

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not for me, dear me. I suppose I used to

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smoke once, how very odd given it up. I don't know.

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I suppose I must have. Anyway, I don't do it now.

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I would as soon think of eating meat. Another victim

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on the smoking altar of vegetarianism. Victim asked Frank, do

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I strike you as such? He paused on the margin

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of the stream and whistled softly. Next moment, a moor

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hen made its splashing flight across the river and ran

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up the bank. Frank took it very gently in his

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hands and stroked its head. As the creature lay against

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his shirt, And is the house among the reeds still secure?

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He half crooned to it, And is the missus quite well?

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And are the neighbors flourishing their dear home with you?

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And he flung it into the air. That bird's very tame,

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said Darcy, slightly bewildered. He it is, rather, said Frank,

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following its flight. During dinner, Frank chiefly occupied himself in

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bringing himself up to date in the movements and achievements

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of this old friend, whom he had not seen for

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six years. Those six years, it now appeared, had been

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full of incident and success. For Darcy. He had made

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a name for himself as a portrait painter, which bad

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fair to outlast the vogue of a couple of seasons,

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and his leisure time had been brief then. Some four

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months previously he had been through a severe attack of typhoid,

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the result of which, as concerns this story, was that

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he had come down to this sequestered place to recruit. Yes,

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you've got on, said Frank at the end. I always

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knew you would a r A with more in prospect

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money you roll in it, I suppose. But oh Darcy,

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how much happiness have you had all these years. That

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is the only imperishable possession. And how much have you learned?

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I don't mean an art even I could have done

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well in that, Darcy laughed. Done well, my dear fellow,

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All I have learned in these six years you knew

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so to speak in your cradle. Your old pictures fit

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huge prices. And do you never paint? Now? Frank shook

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his head and no, I'm too busy, he said, doing what?

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Please tell me? That is what every one is for,

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ever asking me doing? I suppose you would say, I

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do nothing. Darcy glanced up at the brilliant young face

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opposite him. It seems to suit you that way of

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being busy, he said. Now it's your turn. Do you read?

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Do you study? I remember you saying that it would

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do us, all, all us artists. I mean a great

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deal of good if we would study any one human

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face carefully for a year without recording a line. Have

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you been doing that? Frank shook his head again. I

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mean exactly what I say, he said. I have been

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doing nothing, and I've never been so occupied. Look at me?

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Have I not done something to myself? To begin with?

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You're two years younger than I said, Darcy, at least

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you used to be you therefore are thirty five. But

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had I never seen you before, I should say you

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were just twenty. But was it worth while to spend

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six years of greatly occupied life in order to look

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seems rather like a woman of fashion? Frank laughed boisterously.

241
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The first time I've ever been compared to that particular

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bird of prey, He said, No, that has not been

243
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my occupation. In fact, I'm only very rarely conscious that

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one effect of my occupation has been that. Of course

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it must have been, if one comes to think of it,

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it's not very important. Quite true, my body has become young,

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but that's very little I have become young. Darcy pushed

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back his chair and sat sideways to the table, looking

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at the other. Has that been your occupation, then? He asked? Yes, that, anyhow,

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is one aspect of it. Think what youth means. It

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is the capacity for growth mind, body, spirit, All grow,

252
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all get stronger, all have a fuller, firmer life. Every day.

253
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That is something, considering that every day that passes after

254
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the ordinary man reaches the full blown flower of his strength,

255
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weakens his hold on life. A man reaches his prime,

256
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and remains we say, in his prime for ten years,

257
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or perhaps twenty. But after his primest prime is reached,

258
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he slowly, insensibly weakens. These are the signs of age

259
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in you, in your body, in your art, probably in

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your mind. You're less electric than you were. But I

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when I reach my prime, I'm nearing it. A ha ha.

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You shall see. The stars had begun to appear in

263
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the blue velvet of the sky. As to the east,

264
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the horizon seen above the black silhouette of the village

265
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was growing dove colored with the approach of moonrise. White

266
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moths hovered dimly over the garden beds, and the footsteps

267
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of night tiptoed through the bushes. Suddenly, Frank rose, Ah,

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it is the supreme moment, he said, softly, Now, more

269
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than at any other time. The current of life, the eternal,

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imperishable current, runs so close to me that I am

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almost enveloped in it. Be silent a minute. He advanced

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to the edge of the terrace and looked out, standing

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stretched with arms outspread. Darcy heard him draw a long

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breath into his lungs, and, after many seconds, expel it again.

275
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Six or eight times. He did this, then turned back

276
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into the lamp light. It will sound to you quite mad,

277
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I expect, he said. But if you want to hear

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the soberest truth I have ever spoken, and shall ever speak,

279
00:19:05,480 --> 00:19:09,480
I will tell you about myself. But come into the garden,

280
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if it's not too damp for you. I have never

281
00:19:12,720 --> 00:19:16,000
told anyone yet, but I shall like to tell you.

282
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It's long, in fact, since I have even tried to

283
00:19:19,839 --> 00:19:24,759
classify what I have learned. They wandered into the fragrant

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dimness of the pergola and sat down. Then Frank began.

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Years ago, do you remember, he said, we used often

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to talk about the decay of joy in the world.

287
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Many impulses, we settled had contributed to this decay, some

288
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of which were good in themselves, others that were quite

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completely bad. Among the good things, I caught what we

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00:19:50,000 --> 00:19:56,640
may call certain Christian virtues, renunciation, resignation, sympathy with suffering,

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and the desire to relieve sufferers. But out of those

292
00:20:01,400 --> 00:20:07,000
things spring very bad ones, useless renunciations, asceticism for its

293
00:20:07,000 --> 00:20:10,839
own sake, mortification of the flesh with nothing to follow,

294
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no corresponding gain. That is, and that awful and terrible

295
00:20:15,920 --> 00:20:20,759
disease which devastated England some centuries ago, and from which

296
00:20:20,839 --> 00:20:26,960
by heredity of spirit we suffer. Now Puritanism, that was

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a dreadful plague. The brutes held and taught that joy

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and laughter and merriment were evil. It was a doctrine,

299
00:20:36,119 --> 00:20:41,440
the most profane and wicked. Why what is the commonest

300
00:20:41,480 --> 00:20:45,799
crime one sees a sullen face? That is the truth

301
00:20:45,839 --> 00:20:50,279
of the matter. Now, all my life I have believed

302
00:20:50,319 --> 00:20:54,240
that we are intended to be happy, that joy is,

303
00:20:54,279 --> 00:20:58,079
of all gifts, the most divine. And when I left

304
00:20:58,119 --> 00:21:02,160
London abandoned my career, such as it was, I did

305
00:21:02,240 --> 00:21:05,200
so because I intended to devote my life to the

306
00:21:05,240 --> 00:21:10,599
cultivation of joy, and by continuous and unsparing effort to

307
00:21:10,880 --> 00:21:16,039
be happy among people and in constant intercourse with others.

308
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I did not find it possible. There were too many

309
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distractions in towns and work rooms, and also too much suffering.

310
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So I took one step backwards or forwards, as you

311
00:21:30,000 --> 00:21:33,279
may choose to put it, and went straight to nature,

312
00:21:33,799 --> 00:21:39,039
to trees, birds, animals, to all those things which quite

313
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clearly pursue one aim only, which blindly follow the great

314
00:21:44,400 --> 00:21:48,440
native instinct to be happy without any care at all

315
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for morality or human law or divine law. I wanted

316
00:21:53,720 --> 00:21:58,519
you understand to get all joy first hand and unadulterated.

317
00:21:59,000 --> 00:22:03,839
And I think it scarce exists among men. It is obsolete.

318
00:22:04,519 --> 00:22:09,359
Darcy turned in his chair. Ah, but what makes birds

319
00:22:09,359 --> 00:22:15,559
and animals happy? He asked? Food, food, and mating. Frank

320
00:22:15,640 --> 00:22:19,319
laughed gently in the stillness. And don't think I became

321
00:22:19,359 --> 00:22:23,720
a sensualist, he said. I didn't make that mistake. For

322
00:22:23,839 --> 00:22:28,559
the sensualist carries his miseries piggyback and round his feet,

323
00:22:28,640 --> 00:22:33,240
des wounds the shroud that shall soon enwrap him. I

324
00:22:33,319 --> 00:22:36,519
may be mad, it's true, but I'm not so stupid

325
00:22:36,599 --> 00:22:41,160
anyhow as to have tried that. No, what is it

326
00:22:41,279 --> 00:22:44,680
that makes puppies play with their own tails? That sends

327
00:22:44,799 --> 00:22:50,039
cats on their prowling ecstatic errands at night? He paused

328
00:22:50,039 --> 00:22:54,200
a moment. So I went to nature, he said. I

329
00:22:54,279 --> 00:22:58,119
sat down here in this new forest, sat down, fair

330
00:22:58,240 --> 00:23:02,920
and square and looked. That was my first difficulty, to

331
00:23:03,039 --> 00:23:07,680
sit here quiet without being bored, to wait, without being impatient,

332
00:23:08,119 --> 00:23:11,799
to be receptive and very alert. Though for a long

333
00:23:11,839 --> 00:23:16,759
time nothing particular happened. The change, in fact was slow

334
00:23:16,960 --> 00:23:21,759
in those early stages, nothing happened, asked Darcy, rather impatiently,

335
00:23:22,160 --> 00:23:25,759
with the sturdy revolt against any new idea, which to

336
00:23:25,759 --> 00:23:29,480
the English mind is synonymous with nonsense. Why what in

337
00:23:29,519 --> 00:23:34,359
the world should happen now? Frank, as he had known him,

338
00:23:34,799 --> 00:23:38,160
was the most generous but most quick tempered of mortal men.

339
00:23:38,799 --> 00:23:41,839
In other words, his anger would flare to a prodigious

340
00:23:41,880 --> 00:23:46,000
beacon under almost no provocation, only to be quenched again

341
00:23:46,119 --> 00:23:50,680
under a gust of no less impulsive kindliness. Thus, the

342
00:23:50,720 --> 00:23:54,480
moment Darcy had spoken, an apology for his hasty question

343
00:23:54,720 --> 00:23:57,240
was half way up his tongue, but there was no

344
00:23:57,279 --> 00:24:01,000
need for it to have traveled even so far. Laughed again,

345
00:24:01,319 --> 00:24:06,920
with kindly genuine mirth. Oh, how I should have resented

346
00:24:06,960 --> 00:24:10,599
that a few years ago, he said, Thank goodness, that

347
00:24:10,799 --> 00:24:13,160
resentment is one of the things I got rid of.

348
00:24:14,200 --> 00:24:17,200
I certainly wish that you should believe my story. In

349
00:24:17,279 --> 00:24:20,799
fact you are going to, but that you, at this

350
00:24:21,000 --> 00:24:26,720
moment should imply that you do not. Doth not concern me. Ah,

351
00:24:27,160 --> 00:24:31,279
your solitary sojournings have made you in human, said Darcy,

352
00:24:31,720 --> 00:24:37,480
still very English. No human, said Frank, rather more human

353
00:24:37,880 --> 00:24:42,400
at least, rather less of an ape. Well, that was

354
00:24:42,440 --> 00:24:46,319
my first quest, he continued, after a moment, the deliberate

355
00:24:46,440 --> 00:24:51,039
and unswerving pursuit of joy, and my method, the eager

356
00:24:51,160 --> 00:24:55,359
contemplation of nature. As far as motive went, I dare

357
00:24:55,440 --> 00:24:58,920
say it was purely selfish. But as far as effect goes,

358
00:24:59,200 --> 00:25:01,680
it seems to me about the best thing one can

359
00:25:01,720 --> 00:25:06,000
do for one's fellow creatures. The happiness is more infectious

360
00:25:06,039 --> 00:25:11,119
than small pox. So, as I said, I sat down

361
00:25:11,279 --> 00:25:15,759
and waited. I looked at happy things zealously avoided the

362
00:25:15,799 --> 00:25:19,920
sight of anything unhappy, and by degrees a little trickle

363
00:25:20,000 --> 00:25:23,400
of the happiness of this blissful world began to filter

364
00:25:23,519 --> 00:25:27,559
into me. The trickle grew more abundant. And now, my

365
00:25:27,640 --> 00:25:30,599
dear fellow, if I could, for a moment divert from

366
00:25:30,640 --> 00:25:34,440
me into you, one half of the torrent of joy

367
00:25:34,519 --> 00:25:37,599
that pours through me day and night, you would throw

368
00:25:37,680 --> 00:25:44,680
the world, art, everything aside, and just live exist. When

369
00:25:44,720 --> 00:25:49,319
a man's body dies, it passes into trees and flowers. Well,

370
00:25:50,079 --> 00:25:52,839
that is what I've been trying to do with my soul.

371
00:25:53,319 --> 00:25:58,400
Before death. The servant had brought into the pergola a

372
00:25:58,519 --> 00:26:01,480
table with siphons and spitirits and had set a lamp

373
00:26:01,559 --> 00:26:05,759
upon it. As Frank spoke, he leaned forward towards the other,

374
00:26:06,240 --> 00:26:09,079
and Darcy, for all his matter of fact common sense,

375
00:26:09,400 --> 00:26:13,559
could have sworn that his companion's face shone was luminous

376
00:26:13,599 --> 00:26:18,519
in itself. His dark brown eyes glowed from within the

377
00:26:18,640 --> 00:26:23,359
unconscious smile of a child irradiated and transformed his face.

378
00:26:24,440 --> 00:26:30,279
Darcy felt suddenly excited, exhilarated. Go On, he said, go on,

379
00:26:30,960 --> 00:26:35,319
I can feel your somehow telling me sober truth. I

380
00:26:35,440 --> 00:26:38,759
dare say you're mad, but I don't see that matters.

381
00:26:39,759 --> 00:26:44,880
Frank laughed again. Mad, he said, es, certainly if you wish,

382
00:26:45,119 --> 00:26:49,960
but I prefer to call it sane. However, nothing matters

383
00:26:50,039 --> 00:26:54,240
less than what anybody chooses to call things. God never

384
00:26:54,319 --> 00:26:57,480
labels his gifts. He just puts them into our hands,

385
00:26:58,079 --> 00:27:00,359
just as he put animals in the garden of Eden

386
00:27:00,680 --> 00:27:05,960
for Adam to name if he felt disposed so. By

387
00:27:06,000 --> 00:27:09,559
the continual observance and study of things that were happy,

388
00:27:09,920 --> 00:27:16,079
continued he. I got happiness. I got joy, but seeking it,

389
00:27:16,200 --> 00:27:19,000
as I did from nature. I got much more, which

390
00:27:19,039 --> 00:27:23,279
I did not seek, but stumbled upon originally by accident.

391
00:27:24,079 --> 00:27:29,319
It's difficult to explain, but I will try. About three

392
00:27:29,440 --> 00:27:32,200
years ago, I was sitting one morning in a place

393
00:27:32,240 --> 00:27:34,799
I will show you to morrow. It is down by

394
00:27:34,799 --> 00:27:38,839
the river bank, very green, dappled with sun and shade,

395
00:27:39,279 --> 00:27:44,319
and the river passes there through some little clumps of reeds. Well,

396
00:27:44,920 --> 00:27:49,640
as I sat there, doing nothing but just looking and listening,

397
00:27:50,480 --> 00:27:54,839
I heard the sound quite distinctly of some flute like

398
00:27:54,920 --> 00:28:01,440
instrument playing a strange, unending melody. I thought at first

399
00:28:01,519 --> 00:28:04,799
it was some musical yokul on the highway, and didn't

400
00:28:04,839 --> 00:28:10,240
pay much attention. But before long the strangeness and indescribable

401
00:28:10,359 --> 00:28:14,240
beauty of the tune struck me. It never repeated itself,

402
00:28:14,640 --> 00:28:18,160
but it never came to an end. Phrase after phrase

403
00:28:18,440 --> 00:28:23,480
ran its sweet course. It worked gradually and inevitably up

404
00:28:23,519 --> 00:28:26,839
to a climax, and having attained it, it went on.

405
00:28:27,640 --> 00:28:32,920
Another climax was reached, and another and another. Then, with

406
00:28:33,000 --> 00:28:37,000
a sudden gasp of wonder, I localized where it came from.

407
00:28:37,640 --> 00:28:41,279
It came from the reeds, and from the sky, and

408
00:28:41,400 --> 00:28:46,160
from the trees. It was everywhere. It was the sound

409
00:28:46,359 --> 00:28:50,400
of life. It was my dear Darcy, as the Greeks

410
00:28:50,400 --> 00:28:53,799
would have said, it was pan playing on his pipes,

411
00:28:54,039 --> 00:28:58,559
the voice of nature. It was the life melody, the

412
00:28:58,599 --> 00:29:04,400
world melody. Darcy was far too interested to interrupt, though

413
00:29:04,440 --> 00:29:06,400
there was a question he would have liked to ask,

414
00:29:07,000 --> 00:29:11,640
and Frank went on. Well, for the moment, I was terrified,

415
00:29:12,359 --> 00:29:17,039
terrified with the impotent horror of nightmare. And I stopped

416
00:29:17,079 --> 00:29:20,240
my ears and just ran from the place and got

417
00:29:20,319 --> 00:29:27,319
back to the house, panting, trembling, literally in a panic. Unknowingly,

418
00:29:27,880 --> 00:29:31,559
for at that time I only pursued joy. I had begun,

419
00:29:31,920 --> 00:29:34,720
since I drew my joy from nature to get in

420
00:29:34,839 --> 00:29:40,799
touch with nature. Nature, force, God call it what you will,

421
00:29:41,359 --> 00:29:45,200
had drawn across my face, a little gossamer web of

422
00:29:45,480 --> 00:29:50,559
essential life. I saw that when I emerged from my terror,

423
00:29:50,880 --> 00:29:53,519
and I went very humbly back to where I had

424
00:29:53,559 --> 00:29:57,119
heard the band pipes. But it was nearly six months

425
00:29:57,160 --> 00:30:00,720
before I heard them again. Why was that, asked Dulcy.

426
00:30:01,440 --> 00:30:05,759
Surely because I had revolted, rebelled, and worst of all,

427
00:30:05,799 --> 00:30:09,680
been frightened. For I believe that just as there is

428
00:30:09,720 --> 00:30:12,839
nothing in the world which so injures one's body is fear,

429
00:30:13,480 --> 00:30:17,039
so there is nothing that so much shuts up the soul.

430
00:30:18,200 --> 00:30:21,160
I was afraid. You see, of the one thing in

431
00:30:21,200 --> 00:30:26,200
the world which has real existence, no wonder its manifestation

432
00:30:26,480 --> 00:30:32,319
was withdrawn, and after six months, after six months, one

433
00:30:32,519 --> 00:30:37,200
blessed morning, I heard the piping again. I wasn't afraid

434
00:30:37,319 --> 00:30:40,759
that time, and since then it has grown louder, it

435
00:30:40,799 --> 00:30:44,920
has become more constant. I now hear it often, and

436
00:30:45,000 --> 00:30:48,079
I can put myself into such an attitude towards nature

437
00:30:48,559 --> 00:30:53,200
that the pipes will almost certainly sound, and never yet

438
00:30:53,559 --> 00:30:57,559
have they played the same tune. It is always something new,

439
00:30:58,039 --> 00:31:03,279
something fuller, richer, more complete than before. What do you

440
00:31:03,359 --> 00:31:08,319
mean by such an attitude towards nature, asked Darcy. I

441
00:31:08,480 --> 00:31:13,480
can't explain that, but by translating it into a bodily attitude.

442
00:31:13,759 --> 00:31:18,519
It is this. Frank sat up for a moment, quite

443
00:31:18,559 --> 00:31:22,880
straight in his chair, then slowly sunk back, with arms

444
00:31:22,920 --> 00:31:30,759
outspread and head drooped. That, he said, an effortless attitude,

445
00:31:31,119 --> 00:31:36,599
but open, resting, receptive. It is just that which you

446
00:31:36,680 --> 00:31:41,400
must do with your soul. Then he sat up again.

447
00:31:42,319 --> 00:31:45,000
One word more, he said, And I will bore you

448
00:31:45,200 --> 00:31:48,960
no further, nor unless you ask me questions, shall I

449
00:31:49,000 --> 00:31:51,960
talk about it again? You will find me, in fact

450
00:31:52,279 --> 00:31:56,000
quite sane in my mode of life, birds and beasts

451
00:31:56,079 --> 00:31:59,799
you will see behaving somewhat intimately to me like that more,

452
00:32:00,480 --> 00:32:03,759
but that is all. I will walk with you, ride

453
00:32:03,759 --> 00:32:06,160
with you, play golf with you, and talk with you

454
00:32:06,240 --> 00:32:09,519
on any subject you like. But I wanted you on

455
00:32:09,720 --> 00:32:13,759
the threshold to know what has happened to me. And

456
00:32:13,920 --> 00:32:19,119
one thing more will happen. He paused again, and a

457
00:32:19,119 --> 00:32:23,920
slight look of fear crossed his eyes. There will be

458
00:32:24,319 --> 00:32:28,920
a final revelation, he said, a complete and blinding stroke

459
00:32:29,240 --> 00:32:32,039
which will throw open to me once and for all

460
00:32:32,519 --> 00:32:37,960
the full knowledge, the full realization and comprehension that I

461
00:32:38,000 --> 00:32:43,519
am one just as you are with life. In reality,

462
00:32:43,640 --> 00:32:48,200
there is no me, no you, no it. Everything is

463
00:32:48,319 --> 00:32:52,079
part of the one and only thing which is life.

464
00:32:53,119 --> 00:32:56,759
I know that that is so, But the realization of

465
00:32:56,799 --> 00:33:00,359
it is not yet mine, but it will be, And

466
00:33:00,480 --> 00:33:04,160
on that day, so I take it, I shall see pan.

467
00:33:05,359 --> 00:33:08,440
It may mean death, the death of my body, that is,

468
00:33:08,640 --> 00:33:13,480
but I don't care. It may mean immortal, eternal life,

469
00:33:13,799 --> 00:33:19,160
lived here and now and for ever. Then, having gained that,

470
00:33:20,000 --> 00:33:24,640
my dear Darcy, I shall preach such a gospel of joy,

471
00:33:25,279 --> 00:33:30,000
showing myself as the living proof of the truth that puritanism,

472
00:33:30,519 --> 00:33:35,640
the dismal religion of sour faces shall vanish like a

473
00:33:35,680 --> 00:33:40,079
breath of smoke, and be dispers'd and disappear in the

474
00:33:40,119 --> 00:33:46,599
sunlit air. But first the full knowledge must be mine.

475
00:33:47,079 --> 00:33:51,720
Darcy watched his face narrowly. You're afraid of that moment,

476
00:33:52,039 --> 00:33:57,319
he said. Frank smiled at him. Quite true, you're quick

477
00:33:57,359 --> 00:34:00,400
to have seen that. But when it comes, I hope

478
00:34:00,400 --> 00:34:04,799
I shall not be afraid. For some little time, there

479
00:34:04,839 --> 00:34:11,280
was silence. Then Darcy rose, who've bewitched me? You extraordinary boy?

480
00:34:11,519 --> 00:34:14,880
He said? You've been telling me a fairy story? And

481
00:34:15,000 --> 00:34:20,239
I find myself saying, promise me it's true. I promise you,

482
00:34:20,360 --> 00:34:24,079
that said the other. And I know I sha'n't sleep,

483
00:34:24,320 --> 00:34:27,719
added Darcy. Frank looked at him with a sort of

484
00:34:28,239 --> 00:34:33,760
mild wonder, as if he scarcely understood. Well, what does

485
00:34:33,800 --> 00:34:37,840
that matter, he said, I assure you it does. I'm

486
00:34:38,000 --> 00:34:41,880
wretched unless I sleep. Of course, I can make you

487
00:34:41,960 --> 00:34:46,360
sleep if I want, said Frank, in a rather bored voice. Well,

488
00:34:46,639 --> 00:34:51,199
do very good, go to bed. I'll come upstairs in

489
00:34:51,239 --> 00:34:55,679
ten minutes. Frank busied himself for a little after the

490
00:34:55,719 --> 00:34:59,000
other had gone, moving the table back under the awning

491
00:34:59,000 --> 00:35:02,800
of the verandah, and quenching the lamp. Then he went

492
00:35:02,920 --> 00:35:07,639
back with his quick, silent tread upstairs and into Darcy's room.

493
00:35:08,599 --> 00:35:11,639
The latter was already in bed, but very wide eyed

494
00:35:11,679 --> 00:35:15,559
and wakeful, and Frank, with an amused smile of indulgence

495
00:35:15,960 --> 00:35:19,079
as for a fretful child, sat down on the edge

496
00:35:19,079 --> 00:35:24,079
of the bed. Look at me, he said, and Darcy looked.

497
00:35:25,440 --> 00:35:29,360
The birds are sleeping in the break, said Frank softly,

498
00:35:30,000 --> 00:35:34,599
And the winds are asleep. The sea sleeps, and the

499
00:35:34,800 --> 00:35:40,119
tides are but the heaving of its breast. The stars

500
00:35:40,559 --> 00:35:46,480
swing slow rocks in the great cradle of the heavens.

501
00:35:46,559 --> 00:35:51,800
And he stopped, suddenly, gently blew out Darcy's candle, and

502
00:35:52,079 --> 00:35:57,480
left him sleeping. Morning brought to Darcy a flood of

503
00:35:57,559 --> 00:36:01,639
hard common sense, as clear and crisp as the sunshine

504
00:36:01,679 --> 00:36:05,840
that filled his room. Slowly, as he woke, he gathered

505
00:36:05,880 --> 00:36:08,920
together the broken threads of the memories of the evening

506
00:36:08,960 --> 00:36:12,119
which had ended, so he told himself, in a trick

507
00:36:12,239 --> 00:36:17,199
of common hypnotism, that accounted for it all. The whole

508
00:36:17,360 --> 00:36:20,480
strange talk he had had. Was under a spell of

509
00:36:20,519 --> 00:36:25,079
suggestion from the extraordinary, vivid boy who had once been

510
00:36:25,079 --> 00:36:29,039
a man all his own excitement. His acceptance of the

511
00:36:29,119 --> 00:36:33,199
incredible had been merely the effect of a stronger, more

512
00:36:33,280 --> 00:36:37,840
potent will imposed on his own. How strong that will was,

513
00:36:38,199 --> 00:36:42,239
he guessed from his own instantaneous obedience to Frank's suggestion

514
00:36:42,400 --> 00:36:47,880
of sleep, and armed with impenetrable common sense, he came

515
00:36:47,920 --> 00:36:52,880
down to breakfast. Frank had already begun and was consuming

516
00:36:52,920 --> 00:36:56,000
a large plateful of porridge and milk with the most

517
00:36:56,000 --> 00:37:02,239
prosaic and healthy appetite. Step twell, he asked, Yes, of course,

518
00:37:03,000 --> 00:37:07,599
where did you learn hypnotism? By the side of the river.

519
00:37:08,440 --> 00:37:13,559
You talked an amazing quantity of nonsense last night, remarked Darcy,

520
00:37:14,119 --> 00:37:18,239
in a voice prickly with reason. Oh, rather, I felt

521
00:37:18,280 --> 00:37:22,599
quite giddy. Look, I remember to order a dreadful daily

522
00:37:22,639 --> 00:37:26,039
paper for you. You can read about any money, markets, or

523
00:37:26,119 --> 00:37:31,840
politics or cricket matches. Darcy looked at him closely in

524
00:37:31,880 --> 00:37:37,079
the morning light. Frank looked even fresher, younger, more vital

525
00:37:37,159 --> 00:37:39,920
than he had done the night before, and the sight

526
00:37:40,000 --> 00:37:45,480
of him somehow dnted Darcy's armor of common sense. You're

527
00:37:45,559 --> 00:37:50,159
the most extraordinary fellow I ever saw, he said, I

528
00:37:50,320 --> 00:37:55,400
want to ask you some more questions. Ask away, said Frank.

529
00:37:57,719 --> 00:38:00,559
For the next day or two, Darcie, he replied his

530
00:38:00,559 --> 00:38:04,679
friend with many questions, objections, and criticisms on the theory

531
00:38:04,719 --> 00:38:08,199
of life, and gradually got out of him a coherent

532
00:38:08,559 --> 00:38:13,039
and complete account of his experience. In brief then, Frank

533
00:38:13,119 --> 00:38:16,960
believed that by lying naked, as he put it to

534
00:38:17,039 --> 00:38:20,280
the force which controls the passage of the stars, the

535
00:38:20,320 --> 00:38:23,159
breaking of a wave, the budding of a tree, the

536
00:38:23,239 --> 00:38:26,119
love of a youth and maiden, he had succeeded in

537
00:38:26,159 --> 00:38:30,239
a way hitherto undreamed of, in possessing himself of the

538
00:38:30,400 --> 00:38:35,239
essential principle of life. Day by day, so he thought

539
00:38:35,519 --> 00:38:38,519
he was getting nearer to and in closer union with

540
00:38:39,079 --> 00:38:42,960
the great power itself, which caused all life, to be

541
00:38:43,920 --> 00:38:47,880
the spirit of nature, of force, or the spirit of God.

542
00:38:48,880 --> 00:38:52,559
For himself he confessed to what others would call paganism.

543
00:38:53,119 --> 00:38:56,559
It was sufficient for him that there existed a principle

544
00:38:56,719 --> 00:38:59,920
of life. He did not worship it, he did not

545
00:39:00,239 --> 00:39:04,360
prate it, he did not praise it. Some of it

546
00:39:04,440 --> 00:39:08,280
existed in all human beings, just as it existed in

547
00:39:08,360 --> 00:39:13,199
trees and animals. To realize and make living to himself.

548
00:39:13,280 --> 00:39:16,280
The fact that it was all one was his sole

549
00:39:16,559 --> 00:39:20,679
aim and object. Here, perhaps Darcy would put in a

550
00:39:20,719 --> 00:39:24,800
word of warning. Take care, he said, to see Pan

551
00:39:25,079 --> 00:39:29,480
meant death, did it not. Frank's eyebrows would rise at this.

552
00:39:30,440 --> 00:39:33,800
What does that matter? He said? True, the Greeks were

553
00:39:33,840 --> 00:39:38,760
always right, and they said so. But there is another possibility.

554
00:39:39,360 --> 00:39:42,199
For the nearer I get to it, the more living,

555
00:39:42,519 --> 00:39:46,519
the more vital and young I become. What, then, do

556
00:39:46,559 --> 00:39:50,119
you expect the final revelation will do for you? I

557
00:39:50,159 --> 00:39:54,039
have told you, said he, It will make me immortal.

558
00:39:55,519 --> 00:39:57,840
But it was not so much from speech and argument

559
00:39:58,199 --> 00:40:01,880
that Darcy grew to grasp his RAN's conception as from

560
00:40:01,920 --> 00:40:06,280
the ordinary conduct of his life. They were passing, for instance,

561
00:40:06,320 --> 00:40:09,239
one morning down the village street, when an old woman,

562
00:40:09,639 --> 00:40:14,039
very bent and decrepit, but with an extraordinary cheerfulness of face,

563
00:40:14,480 --> 00:40:19,079
hobbled out from her cottage. Frank instantly stopped when he

564
00:40:19,119 --> 00:40:23,599
saw her. You, oh, darling, how goes it all? He said,

565
00:40:24,679 --> 00:40:29,000
But she didn't answer. Her dim old eyes were riveted

566
00:40:29,079 --> 00:40:32,440
on his face. She seemed to drink in, like a

567
00:40:32,480 --> 00:40:38,320
thirsty creature, the beautiful radiance which shone there suddenly she

568
00:40:38,400 --> 00:40:42,639
put her two withered old hands on his shoulders. You're

569
00:40:43,119 --> 00:40:47,599
just the sunshine in itself, she said, and he kissed

570
00:40:47,599 --> 00:40:52,679
her and passed on. But scarcely a hundred yards further,

571
00:40:53,079 --> 00:40:57,800
a strange contradiction of such tenderness occurred. A child running

572
00:40:57,800 --> 00:41:00,760
along the path towards them, fell on a face and

573
00:41:00,920 --> 00:41:05,760
set up a dismal cry of fright and pain. A

574
00:41:05,800 --> 00:41:09,360
look of horror came into Frank's eyes, and, putting his

575
00:41:09,480 --> 00:41:13,159
fingers in his ears, he fled at full speed down

576
00:41:13,199 --> 00:41:18,320
the street and didn't pause till he was out of hearing. Darcy,

577
00:41:18,519 --> 00:41:22,159
having ascertained that the child was not really hurt, followed

578
00:41:22,199 --> 00:41:26,960
him in bewilderment. Are you without pity? Then, he asked.

579
00:41:27,679 --> 00:41:32,280
Frank shook his head impatiently. Can't you see, he asked,

580
00:41:32,480 --> 00:41:36,320
can't you understand that that sort of thing, pain, anger,

581
00:41:36,760 --> 00:41:41,400
anything unlovely, throws me back retards the coming of the

582
00:41:41,440 --> 00:41:44,920
great hour. Perhaps when it comes I shall be able

583
00:41:45,000 --> 00:41:47,119
to piece that side of life on to the other,

584
00:41:47,559 --> 00:41:51,960
onto the true religion of joy. At present I can't.

585
00:41:53,360 --> 00:41:59,079
But the old woman was she not ugly? Frank's radiance

586
00:41:59,159 --> 00:42:04,239
gradually returned, And oh no, she was like me. She

587
00:42:04,440 --> 00:42:07,639
longed for joy and knew it when she saw it.

588
00:42:07,880 --> 00:42:15,119
The old darling. Another question suggested itself. Then what about Christianity,

589
00:42:15,559 --> 00:42:19,920
asked Darcy. I can't accept it. I can't believe in

590
00:42:19,960 --> 00:42:24,039
any creed of which the central doctrine is that God,

591
00:42:24,280 --> 00:42:28,480
who is joy, should have had to suffer. Perhaps it

592
00:42:28,639 --> 00:42:32,320
was so in some inscrutable way. I believe it may

593
00:42:32,360 --> 00:42:36,360
have been so, but I don't understand how it was possible.

594
00:42:36,840 --> 00:42:42,079
So I leave it alone. My affair is joy. They

595
00:42:42,119 --> 00:42:44,719
had come to the weir above the village, and the

596
00:42:44,760 --> 00:42:48,239
thunder of riotous cool water was heavy in the air.

597
00:42:49,239 --> 00:42:54,119
Trees dipped into the translucent stream with slender trailing branches,

598
00:42:54,559 --> 00:42:58,320
and the meadow where they stood was starred with midsummer blossomings.

599
00:42:59,320 --> 00:43:03,400
Larks shot up, caroling into the crystal dome of the blue,

600
00:43:03,599 --> 00:43:08,519
and a thousand voices of June sang round them. Frank,

601
00:43:08,679 --> 00:43:11,760
bare headed as was his wont, with his coats slung

602
00:43:11,840 --> 00:43:14,960
over his arm and his shirt sleeves rolled up above

603
00:43:15,000 --> 00:43:19,320
the elbow, stood there like some beautiful wild animal, with

604
00:43:19,440 --> 00:43:23,639
eyes half shut and mouth half open, drinking in the

605
00:43:23,760 --> 00:43:28,760
scented warmth of the air. Then suddenly he flung himself

606
00:43:28,840 --> 00:43:31,480
face downwards on the grass at the edge of the stream,

607
00:43:32,119 --> 00:43:35,960
burying his face in the daisies and cowslips and slay,

608
00:43:36,079 --> 00:43:41,079
stretched there in wide armed ecstasy, with his long fingers

609
00:43:41,119 --> 00:43:46,360
pressing and stroking the dewy herbs of the field. Never

610
00:43:46,440 --> 00:43:51,320
before had Darcy seen him thus fully possessed by his idea,

611
00:43:51,480 --> 00:43:55,719
his caressing fingers, his half buried face pressed close to

612
00:43:55,800 --> 00:44:00,239
the grass. Even the clothed lines of his figure were

613
00:44:00,440 --> 00:44:04,480
instinct with a vitality that somehow was different from that

614
00:44:04,559 --> 00:44:10,000
of other men, And some faint glow from it reached Darcy.

615
00:44:10,559 --> 00:44:15,480
Some thrill, some vibration from that charged recumbent body passed

616
00:44:15,480 --> 00:44:19,039
to him, and for a moment he understood as he

617
00:44:19,039 --> 00:44:23,360
had not understood before, despite his persistent questions and the

618
00:44:23,400 --> 00:44:28,199
candid answers there received, how real and how realized by

619
00:44:28,280 --> 00:44:34,960
Frank his idea was. Then suddenly, the muscles in Frank's

620
00:44:35,000 --> 00:44:38,800
neck became stiff and alert, and he half raised his head,

621
00:44:38,920 --> 00:44:46,119
whispering the pan pipes, the pan pipes close, oh so close,

622
00:44:48,199 --> 00:44:52,280
very slowly, as if a sudden movement might interrupt the melody.

623
00:44:52,800 --> 00:44:56,320
He raised himself and leaned on the elbow of his

624
00:44:56,440 --> 00:45:02,199
bent arm. His eyes opened white, the lower lids drooped,

625
00:45:02,280 --> 00:45:05,800
as if he focused his eyes on something very far away,

626
00:45:06,639 --> 00:45:09,920
and the smile on his face broadened and quivered like

627
00:45:10,039 --> 00:45:14,440
sunlight on still water, till the exultance of its happiness

628
00:45:14,840 --> 00:45:20,119
was scarcely human. So he remained motionless and rapt for

629
00:45:20,280 --> 00:45:24,400
some minutes. Then the look of listening died from his face,

630
00:45:24,880 --> 00:45:30,679
and he bowed his head, satisfied. Ah, that was good,

631
00:45:31,159 --> 00:45:35,920
he said. How is it possible you didn't hear? Oh,

632
00:45:35,960 --> 00:45:41,320
you poor fellow, did you really hear nothing? A week

633
00:45:41,400 --> 00:45:45,679
of this outdoor and stimulating life did wonders in restoring

634
00:45:45,719 --> 00:45:48,760
to Darcy the vigor and health which his weeks of

635
00:45:48,840 --> 00:45:52,719
fever had filched from him. And as his normal activity

636
00:45:52,880 --> 00:45:57,000
and higher pressure of vitality returned, he seemed to himself

637
00:45:57,280 --> 00:46:00,800
to fall even more under the spell which the miracle

638
00:46:00,920 --> 00:46:05,440
of Frank's youth cast over him. Twenty times a day.

639
00:46:05,559 --> 00:46:09,079
He found himself saying to himself suddenly, at the end

640
00:46:09,079 --> 00:46:12,719
of some ten minutes silent resistance to the absurdity of

641
00:46:12,719 --> 00:46:17,760
Frank's idea. But it isn't possible. It can't be possible.

642
00:46:18,719 --> 00:46:21,119
And from the fact of his having to assure himself

643
00:46:21,159 --> 00:46:24,480
so frequently of this, he knew that he was struggling

644
00:46:24,639 --> 00:46:28,519
and arguing with a conclusion which had already taken root

645
00:46:28,639 --> 00:46:33,079
in his mind, For in any case, a visible, living

646
00:46:33,239 --> 00:46:37,920
miracle confronted him. Since it was equally impossible that this youth,

647
00:46:38,239 --> 00:46:42,360
this boy trembling on the verge of manhood, was thirty five.

648
00:46:43,280 --> 00:46:48,840
Yet such was the fact. July was ushered in by

649
00:46:48,880 --> 00:46:52,880
a couple of days of blustering and fretful rain, and Darcy,

650
00:46:53,199 --> 00:46:56,719
unwilling to risk a chill, kept to the house. But

651
00:46:56,800 --> 00:46:59,960
to Frank, this weeping change of weather seemed to have

652
00:47:00,320 --> 00:47:03,400
no bearing on the behavior of man, and he spent

653
00:47:03,519 --> 00:47:07,000
his days exactly as he did under the suns of June,

654
00:47:07,519 --> 00:47:11,519
lying in his hammock, stretched on the dripping grass, or

655
00:47:11,599 --> 00:47:16,679
making huge, rambling excursions into the forest, the birds hopping

656
00:47:16,719 --> 00:47:20,039
from tree to tree after him, to return in the evening,

657
00:47:20,280 --> 00:47:24,480
drenched and soaked, but with the same unquenchable flame of

658
00:47:24,599 --> 00:47:29,440
joy burning within him. Catch cold, he would ask, I've

659
00:47:29,519 --> 00:47:32,400
forgotten how to do it. I think. I suppose it

660
00:47:32,440 --> 00:47:35,920
makes one's body more sensible always to sleep out of doors.

661
00:47:36,519 --> 00:47:41,000
People who live indoors always remind me of something peeled

662
00:47:41,159 --> 00:47:44,599
and skinless. Do you mean to say you slept out

663
00:47:44,599 --> 00:47:48,360
of doors last night in that deluge, asked Darcy. And

664
00:47:48,440 --> 00:47:53,079
where may I ask? Frank thought, for a moment, I

665
00:47:53,400 --> 00:47:56,960
stepped in the hammock till nearly dawn, he said, For

666
00:47:57,039 --> 00:47:59,760
I remember the light blinked in the east when I awoke.

667
00:48:00,599 --> 00:48:04,639
Then I went, Where did I go? Oh? Yes, to

668
00:48:04,719 --> 00:48:07,280
the meadow where the pan pipe sounded so close a

669
00:48:07,320 --> 00:48:10,480
week ago. You will with me, do you remember? But

670
00:48:10,559 --> 00:48:14,079
I always have a rug if it's wet, And he

671
00:48:14,159 --> 00:48:19,960
went whistling upstairs. Somehow that little touch, his obvious effort

672
00:48:20,159 --> 00:48:23,320
to recall where he had slept, brought strangely home to

673
00:48:23,400 --> 00:48:26,599
Darcy the wonderful romance of which he was the still

674
00:48:26,800 --> 00:48:31,880
half incredulous beholder. Sleep till close on dawn in a hammock,

675
00:48:32,519 --> 00:48:36,800
then the tramp or probably scamper underneath the windy and

676
00:48:36,920 --> 00:48:40,960
weeping heavens, to the remote and lonely meadow by the weir.

677
00:48:42,239 --> 00:48:46,480
The picture of other such nights rose before him, Frank sleeping,

678
00:48:46,719 --> 00:48:50,159
perhaps by the bathing place, under the filtered twilight of

679
00:48:50,199 --> 00:48:54,599
the stars or the white blaze of moonshine, astir and

680
00:48:54,719 --> 00:48:58,880
wakening at some dead hour, perhaps a space of silent,

681
00:48:59,079 --> 00:49:02,920
wide eyed thought, and then a wandering through the hushed

682
00:49:02,960 --> 00:49:07,800
woods to some other dormitory, alone with his happiness, alone

683
00:49:07,960 --> 00:49:11,960
with the joy and the life that suffused and enveloped him,

684
00:49:12,480 --> 00:49:16,559
without other thought or desire or aim except the hourly

685
00:49:17,039 --> 00:49:22,800
and never ceasing communion with the joy of nature. They

686
00:49:22,800 --> 00:49:25,400
were in the middle of dinner that night, talking on

687
00:49:25,519 --> 00:49:29,239
indifferent subjects, when Darcys suddenly broke off in the middle

688
00:49:29,239 --> 00:49:33,159
of a sentence. I've got it, he said, at last,

689
00:49:33,519 --> 00:49:39,760
I've got it. Congratulate you, said, Frank, But what the

690
00:49:39,920 --> 00:49:45,119
radical unsoundness of your idea? It is this? All nature,

691
00:49:45,280 --> 00:49:51,079
from highest to lowest, is full, crammed, full of suffering.

692
00:49:51,320 --> 00:49:56,000
Every living organism in nature preys on another. Yet in

693
00:49:56,079 --> 00:49:59,280
your aim to get close, to to be one with nature,

694
00:49:59,679 --> 00:50:03,559
you leave suffering altogether out, You run away from it,

695
00:50:03,800 --> 00:50:07,440
You refuse to recognize it. And you're waiting, you say,

696
00:50:07,559 --> 00:50:15,920
for the final revelation. Frank's brow clouded slightly well, he asked,

697
00:50:16,119 --> 00:50:21,199
rather wearily. Can't you guess then, when the final revelation

698
00:50:21,400 --> 00:50:25,559
will be? Enjoy You're supreme? I grant you that I

699
00:50:25,760 --> 00:50:28,519
didn't know a man could be so master of it.

700
00:50:29,199 --> 00:50:33,480
You've learned, perhaps practically all that nature can teach. And if,

701
00:50:33,519 --> 00:50:36,519
as you think, the final revelation is coming to you,

702
00:50:36,960 --> 00:50:42,199
it will be the revelation of horror, suffering, death, pain

703
00:50:42,440 --> 00:50:48,519
in all its hideous forms. Suffering does exist. You hate

704
00:50:48,599 --> 00:50:53,480
it and fear it. Frank held up his hand. Stop

705
00:50:53,920 --> 00:50:58,519
let me think, he said. There was silence for a

706
00:50:58,599 --> 00:51:03,639
long minute that never struck me. He said, at length,

707
00:51:04,320 --> 00:51:08,559
it is possible that what you suggest is true. Does

708
00:51:08,599 --> 00:51:11,960
the sight of Pan mean that? Do you think? Is

709
00:51:12,039 --> 00:51:17,000
it that nature take it altogether? Suffers, horribly, suffers to

710
00:51:17,119 --> 00:51:22,239
a hideous and inconceivable extent. Shall I be shown all

711
00:51:22,400 --> 00:51:27,079
the suffering? He got up and came round to where

712
00:51:27,159 --> 00:51:32,920
Darcy sat. If it is so, so be it, he said, Because,

713
00:51:33,000 --> 00:51:37,119
my dear fellow, I am near, so splendidly near to

714
00:51:37,239 --> 00:51:41,559
the final revelation. To day the pipes have sounded almost

715
00:51:41,639 --> 00:51:45,719
without pause. I have even heard the rustle in the bushes.

716
00:51:45,800 --> 00:51:50,519
I believe of Pan's coming. I have seen yet I

717
00:51:50,559 --> 00:51:53,880
saw to day the bushes pushed aside as if by

718
00:51:53,920 --> 00:51:58,639
a hand, and peace of a face not human peered through.

719
00:51:59,639 --> 00:52:02,840
But I wasn't frightened. At least I didn't run away

720
00:52:02,920 --> 00:52:06,480
this time. He took a turn up to the window

721
00:52:06,559 --> 00:52:11,679
and back again. Yes, there is suffering all through, he said,

722
00:52:12,079 --> 00:52:16,039
and I have left it all out of my search. Perhaps,

723
00:52:16,119 --> 00:52:19,880
as you say, the revelation will be that, and in

724
00:52:19,960 --> 00:52:24,000
that case it will be good bye. I have gone

725
00:52:24,039 --> 00:52:27,360
on one line. I shall have gone too far along

726
00:52:27,440 --> 00:52:31,639
one road without having explored the other. But I can't

727
00:52:31,639 --> 00:52:34,719
go back now. I wouldn't if I could not a

728
00:52:34,920 --> 00:52:39,639
step would I retrace. In any case, whatever the revelation is,

729
00:52:40,000 --> 00:52:46,119
it will be God. I'm sure of that. The rainy

730
00:52:46,119 --> 00:52:49,239
weather soon passed, and with the return of the sun,

731
00:52:49,679 --> 00:52:55,039
Darcy again joined Frank in long, rambling days. It grew

732
00:52:55,119 --> 00:52:59,480
extraordinarily hotter, and with the fresh bursting of life after

733
00:52:59,519 --> 00:53:06,000
the rain, Frank's vitality seemed to blaze higher and higher then,

734
00:53:06,039 --> 00:53:09,039
as is the habit of the English weather, one evening,

735
00:53:09,199 --> 00:53:13,039
clouds began to bank themselves up in the west. The

736
00:53:13,079 --> 00:53:16,920
sun went down in a glare of coppery thunder rack,

737
00:53:17,440 --> 00:53:23,400
and the whole earth, broiling under an unspeakable oppression and sultiness,

738
00:53:23,440 --> 00:53:29,840
paused and panted for the storm. After sunset, the remote

739
00:53:29,880 --> 00:53:33,840
fires of lightning began to wink and flickered on the horizon,

740
00:53:34,519 --> 00:53:37,800
But when bedtime came, the storm seemed to have moved

741
00:53:37,960 --> 00:53:43,079
no nearer, though a very low, unceasing noise of thunder

742
00:53:43,320 --> 00:53:48,239
was audible. Weary and oppressed by the stress of the day,

743
00:53:48,800 --> 00:53:54,880
Darcy fell at once into a heavy, uncomforting sleep. He

744
00:53:54,960 --> 00:53:58,719
woke suddenly into full consciousness with the din of some

745
00:53:58,920 --> 00:54:03,480
appalling explosion of thunder in his ears, and sat up

746
00:54:03,480 --> 00:54:07,400
in bed with a racing heart. Then, for a moment,

747
00:54:07,679 --> 00:54:11,159
as he recover'd himself from the panic land which lies

748
00:54:11,239 --> 00:54:15,960
between sleeping and waking, there was silence, except for the

749
00:54:16,039 --> 00:54:21,039
steady hissing of rain on the shrubs outside his window.

750
00:54:21,400 --> 00:54:26,480
But suddenly that silence was shattered and shredded into fragments

751
00:54:26,679 --> 00:54:30,880
by a scream from somewhere close at hand, outside in

752
00:54:30,920 --> 00:54:37,800
the back garden, a scream of supreme and despairing terror. Again,

753
00:54:38,280 --> 00:54:42,599
and once again it shrilled up, and then a babble

754
00:54:42,679 --> 00:54:48,199
of awful words was interjected. A quivering, sobbing voice that

755
00:54:48,360 --> 00:54:54,599
he knew, said my God, Oh, my God, oh Christ,

756
00:54:55,039 --> 00:55:01,239
and then followed a little mocking, bleating laugh. Then was

757
00:55:01,360 --> 00:55:08,159
silence again, only the rain hissed on the shrubs. All

758
00:55:08,199 --> 00:55:11,199
this was but the affair of the moment, and without

759
00:55:11,320 --> 00:55:14,519
pause either to put on clothes or light a candle,

760
00:55:15,039 --> 00:55:19,079
Darcy was already fumbling at his door handle. Even as

761
00:55:19,119 --> 00:55:22,480
he opened it, he met a terror stricken face outside,

762
00:55:23,039 --> 00:55:26,800
that of the man servant who carried a life. Did

763
00:55:26,800 --> 00:55:31,320
you hear, he asked. The man's voice was bleached to

764
00:55:31,440 --> 00:55:36,199
a dull, shining whiteness. Yes, sir, he said, it was

765
00:55:36,280 --> 00:55:41,320
the Master's voice. Together they hurried down the stairs and

766
00:55:41,440 --> 00:55:44,679
through the dining room, where an orderly table for breakfast

767
00:55:44,719 --> 00:55:47,480
had already been laid, and out on to the terrace.

768
00:55:48,480 --> 00:55:51,880
The rain for the moment had been utterly stayed, as

769
00:55:51,880 --> 00:55:54,559
if the tap of the heavens had been turned off.

770
00:55:55,119 --> 00:55:59,360
And under the lowering black sky not quite dark, since

771
00:55:59,400 --> 00:56:03,599
the moon rose somewhere serene behind the conglomerated thunder clouds,

772
00:56:04,239 --> 00:56:08,119
Darcies stumbled into the garden, followed by the servant with

773
00:56:08,199 --> 00:56:12,920
the candle. The monstrous, leaping shadow of himself was cast

774
00:56:12,960 --> 00:56:16,960
before him on the lawn. Lost and wandering odors of

775
00:56:17,119 --> 00:56:20,920
rose and lily and damp earth were thick about him.

776
00:56:21,360 --> 00:56:25,400
But more pungent was some sharp and acrid smell that

777
00:56:25,599 --> 00:56:28,960
suddenly reminded him of a certain chalet in which he

778
00:56:29,039 --> 00:56:33,320
had once taken refuge in the Alps. In the blackness

779
00:56:33,480 --> 00:56:36,639
of the hazy light from the sky and the vague

780
00:56:36,760 --> 00:56:40,039
tossing of the candle behind him, he saw that the

781
00:56:40,079 --> 00:56:44,800
hammock in which Frank so often lay was tenanted. A

782
00:56:44,840 --> 00:56:47,679
gleam of white shirt was there, as if a man

783
00:56:47,880 --> 00:56:51,039
sitting up in it, But across that there was an

784
00:56:51,079 --> 00:56:56,199
obscure dark shadow, and as he approached the acrid odor

785
00:56:56,360 --> 00:57:00,719
grew more intense. He was now only some few yards

786
00:57:00,719 --> 00:57:04,280
away when suddenly the black shadow seemed to jump into

787
00:57:04,320 --> 00:57:07,960
the air and came down with tappings of hard hoofs

788
00:57:08,000 --> 00:57:11,559
on the brick path that ran down the burglar, and

789
00:57:11,679 --> 00:57:17,599
with frolicsome skippings, galloped off into the bushes. When that

790
00:57:17,920 --> 00:57:21,840
was gone, Darcy could see quite clearly that a shirted

791
00:57:21,920 --> 00:57:26,119
figure sat up in the hammock. For one moment, from

792
00:57:26,280 --> 00:57:29,480
sheer terror of the unseen, he hung on his step,

793
00:57:29,960 --> 00:57:34,199
and the servant joining him, they walked together to the hammock.

794
00:57:35,400 --> 00:57:39,480
It was Frank. He was in shirts and trousers only,

795
00:57:39,880 --> 00:57:45,199
and he sat up with braced arms for one half

796
00:57:45,320 --> 00:57:49,800
second he stared at them, his face a mask of horrible,

797
00:57:49,960 --> 00:57:55,199
contoted terror. His upper lip was drawn back so that

798
00:57:55,320 --> 00:57:58,360
the guns of the teeth appeared, and his eyes were

799
00:57:58,440 --> 00:58:01,559
focused not on the two who approached him, but on

800
00:58:01,719 --> 00:58:06,880
something quite close to him. His nostrils were widely expanded,

801
00:58:07,320 --> 00:58:11,639
as if he panted for breath, and terror incarnate and

802
00:58:11,840 --> 00:58:17,960
repulsion and deathly anguish ruled dreadful lines on his smooth

803
00:58:18,119 --> 00:58:23,960
cheeks and forehead. Then, even as they looked, the body

804
00:58:24,360 --> 00:58:29,800
sank backwards, and the robes of the hammock wheezed and strained.

805
00:58:32,440 --> 00:58:37,440
Darcy lifted him out and carried him indoors. Once he

806
00:58:37,519 --> 00:58:40,679
thought there was a faint, convulsive stir of the limbs

807
00:58:40,719 --> 00:58:43,199
that lay with so dead a weight in his arms.

808
00:58:43,960 --> 00:58:47,719
But when they got inside there was no trace of life.

809
00:58:48,880 --> 00:58:53,000
But the look of supreme terror and agony of fear

810
00:58:53,960 --> 00:58:58,199
had gone from his face. A boy tired with play,

811
00:58:58,719 --> 00:59:02,280
but still smiling in his sleep. Was the burden he

812
00:59:02,360 --> 00:59:06,880
laid on the floor. His eyes had closed, and the

813
00:59:06,920 --> 00:59:11,079
beautiful mouth lay in smiling curves, even as when a

814
00:59:11,119 --> 00:59:14,320
few mornings ago in the meadow by the weir, it

815
00:59:14,400 --> 00:59:17,840
had quivered to the music of the unheard melody of

816
00:59:17,960 --> 00:59:25,679
Pan's pipes. Then they looked further. Frank had come back

817
00:59:25,719 --> 00:59:29,000
from his bath before dinner that night in his usual

818
00:59:29,119 --> 00:59:33,280
costume of shirt and trousers, only he had not dressed,

819
00:59:33,760 --> 00:59:37,239
and during dinner, so Darcy remembered, he had rolled up

820
00:59:37,320 --> 00:59:41,800
the sleeves of his shirt to above the elbow. Later,

821
00:59:42,199 --> 00:59:44,719
as they sat and talked after dinner, on the close

822
00:59:44,840 --> 00:59:48,320
sultriness of the evening, he had unbuttoned the front of

823
00:59:48,360 --> 00:59:51,400
his shirt to let what little breath of wind there

824
00:59:51,440 --> 00:59:55,360
was play on his skin. The sleeves were rolled up.

825
00:59:55,400 --> 00:59:58,920
Now the front of the shirt was unbuttoned, and on

826
00:59:59,119 --> 01:00:02,079
his arms and on the brown skin of his chest

827
01:00:02,559 --> 01:00:08,400
were strange discolorations which grew momently more clear and defined,

828
01:00:09,239 --> 01:00:13,480
till they saw that the marks were pointed prints, as

829
01:00:13,480 --> 01:00:18,320
if caused by the hoofs of some monstrous goat that

830
01:00:18,480 --> 01:00:25,840
had leaped and stamped upon him. End of the man

831
01:00:26,000 --> 01:00:27,239
who went too far