Speaker 1: Hi, this is Johnny Depth and I wrote one thousand
first dates Portrait of a Palm Beach player for guys
like us. Remember these words. Never ever argue with a woman.
Never argue with a woman. Here's a hard earned truth
that every man needs to learn, preferably sooner rather than later.
Never argue with a woman. I'm not saying this is
a joke. I'm not saying this out of bitterness. I'm
saying it as someone who has argued in court rooms
before some of the most demanding, combative judges in the country,
and honestly, I'd take that over an emotionally charged argument
with a woman any day of the week. Court is difficult,
court is rigorous, But at least in court, logic is king,
rules are respected and there is a chance that reason
will actually prevail. With women, especially when emotions are running high,
reason becomes well irrelevant. Logic gets drowned out by waves
of emotion, history, tone, and body language. You can make
the most bulletproof point in the world and it still
won't land if she's not in a space to receive it.
And let's be honest, most arguments don't even begin with
the issue at hand. They begin with a feeling, a
perceived slight, a miscommunication, and before you know it, you're
not just talking about what happened five minutes ago, you're
talking about something that happened five years ago. In court,
there are rules, there are procedures, There are lines that
cannot be crossed in a court room. If the opposing
counsel brings up irrelevant evidence or starts character assassinating you
based on past unrelated mistakes, the judge will shut it down.
But when you're in an argument with a woman, all
the rules go out the window. For her, nothing is
off limits. For you, everything is. If you raise your voice,
you're the aggressor. If you try to walk away, you're
accused of abandoning the conversation. If you stay and defend yourself,
your being argumentative. This isn't to say that women are
inherently unreasonable or that they can't handle conflict maturely. Many
women can, But when things escalate emotionally, especially in romantic relationships,
you're no longer dealing with just her intellect. You're dealing
with her entire emotional archive. Every feeling she's ever suppressed,
every resentment she's ever held onto, every insecurity she hasn't voiced.
All of it can surface in a single conversation, and
when it does, no amount of reason or evidence will
save you. The male brain and the female brain are
wired differently. When it comes to conflict. Men tend to compartmentalize.
They want to address the issue, solve the problem, and
move on. Women, on the other hand, often process things relationally.
They want to explore the emotional landscape, revisit patterns, and
ensure that you truly understand how your actions made them feel,
not just in the moment, but historically. This is not
a bad thing, it's just different. And if you try
to handle a female emotional argument like it's a legal deposition,
you're going to lose every time. The truth is, once
you allow yourself to be pulled into a heated argument,
you've already lost the moment it becomes a shouting match,
or worse, a trade of insults. The dynamic shifts. It's
no longer about resolving anything, it's about emotional dominance, and
in that arena you just can't compete. Women are masters
of emotional warfare. They have a memory for details you've
long forgotten. They know exactly which buttons to push, and
they aren't constrained by the male instinct to stay on topic.
A woman in an emotionally charged state has access to
a verbal arsenal that would make a prosecuting attorney blush.
She will bring up the time you forgot her birthday
three years ago, the way you looked at the waitress
last month, and the sarcastic tone you used during an
argument last week. Nothing is too far back, to minor,
or too irrelevant. It's all on the table, and the
more you try to steer the conversation back to the
original issue, the more she'll remind you that this issue
is just the tip of the iceberg, and well, god
forbid you actually get angry, because once you show real frustration,
once you raise your voice, pound your fist on the table,
or let your face twist into anything that looks like rage,
you've stepped into the trap. She might cry, she might
go cold, she might accuse you of being emotionally unsafe,
And in that moment, it doesn't matter how calm and
collected you were up until now. You're the bad guy.
That's why I always say, don't argue, don't engage, don't escalate.
The minute you feel the energy turning south, and when
you can sense that this is no longer a conversation
but a collision, step back, breathe, say something neutral like
I don't think this is going anywhere right now. Let's
talk when we're both calm, and then walk away, not
storm out, not slam doors, just disengage. It's not weakness,
it's wisdom. Now you might think walking away makes you
look like you're avoiding accountability, and yes, she might say that.
She might accuse you of not caring, of refusing to engage,
of invalidating her feelings. But don't take your bait. You
can always revisit the issue when things cool down. You
can always come back to the conversation with calm, clarity,
and focus. But you can't unsay the cruel thing you
blurted in the heat of battle. You can't unhear the
words that were meant to wound. Understand this. Arguments are
not debates. In a debate, the goal is to win
through superior logic. In an argument, especially with someone you
care about, the goal should be understanding, and understanding cannot
happen when emotions are at a boil. No one listens
well when they feel attacked. No one processes clearly when
their heart rate is pounding out of their chest. And
here's the irony. The calmer you stay, the more emotional
she may become. It's not manipulation, it's biology. When one
person in an emotional exchange doesn't mirror the other's intensity,
it creates tensions. She may interpret your calmer's coldness as indifference,
but that's her process, not yours. Your job isn't to
match her emotion, it's to manage your own. Let me
be clear, I'm not advocating for silence or emotional suppression.
I'm not saying men should never express anger or frustration.
I'm saying there's a time and place, there's a way
to voice your feelings without becoming reactive, and there's tremendous
power in knowing when to speak and when to stay silent.
Think of it this way. Arguing with a woman is
like stepping into a storm. The winds will swirl, the
temperature will rise, debris from the past will start flying,
and if you try to fight the storm, you'll get destroyed.
But if you waded out, if you stay grounded, calm
and centered, the storm passes, And once it does, the
real conversation can begin. Emotional intelligence means knowing when a
fight isn't worth having. It means understanding that your need
to be right is less important than you need to
stay sane. It means realizing that sometimes the best move
isn't a clever comeback or a persuasive argument, it's simply
walking away with your peace intact. You'll find more often
than not that the issue resolves itself when you give
it space. Once the heat dies down, your partner might
even come back with a clearer head, ready to talk
without the fireworks. And if she doesn't, then maybe you
learned something important about the relationship. Maybe that kind of
volatility isn't something you want to keep inviting into your life.
This approach doesn't make you passive. It makes you strategic.
It makes you resilient. It makes you a man who
knows how to handle chaos without becoming chaotic. And trust me,
women respect that, even if they won't admit it in
the moment. They feel safer with a man who doesn't
lose his cool, a man who can absorb the tension
without amplifying it. So next time you feel an argument brewing,
remember this. You're not in court. You're not on trial.
There are no rules here except the ones you choose
to live by, and the most important rule of all.
Protect your peace, guard your energy. Don't let anyone, no
matter how beautiful, intelligent, or emotionally compelling, drag you into
a battle you can't win, because when you argue with
a woman in the heat of the moment, the outcome
is always the same. Everyone loses. But when you stay calm,
stay kind, and walk away with grace, you win every time.
To get a copy of my book, one thousand first
Dates Portrait of a Palm Beach Player, click the link
in the description or go over to Palmbeach player dot com.
Happy Dating,