All right, hello again everyone, Welcome to another episode of the Broken Lords
podcast, a very special episode. Today we're in my good boy Octimer aka
Snideley. No Octimers. I'm sorry, Sue if you got to throw it
out. Cal's name is forgettable. Octimer is memorable. You gotta throw it
out now. You got in that memorable episode today because our good buddy call
aka Snidely motherfucking Whiplash has been kidnapped by fish people and I cannot promise that
it is not for breeding purposes. Hello editor, zoom here. I know
my voice sounds pretty jarring considering the context of this episode. However, I
needed to clarify something due to the fact that the last three minutes of the
previous episode were cut out. What I'm doing is, I'm creating a little
flashback scenario so that you may see the context in which Corey is speaking about
anyways here it is, sorry about that, and enjoy. I will take
middle take first. We'll leave our nighttime safety in the hands of the dancing
Barbarian. Well you want the dancing. Oh, longtime listeners know the Lord.
Longtime listeners know the Lord. We dance the dance could hold, could
winkle toes. Yeah, I want to run observation checks on the watches.
Who's going who? Ricardo is going for customer? Gotcha for success? That's
two crits? Yeah, quatro, the big quatro. Well, okay,
all hands on deck. We're camping with a were wolf. I mean that's
fact. Do you think four successes is enough to notice Nola turning into I
think one would probably be enough to notice Nala turning into a were wolf.
But honestly, at this point, I'll take the four. Throw some momentum
in that point. Well, yeah, three, one, how much momentum?
We're gonna call that two moment So that's the first watch and octimer.
Everything seems pretty chill. You can hear noises far in the distance. There
are a lot of wet, watery noises, but that could be anything because
the entire swamp is south of you. Okay, amazingly, keen ears,
you can hear watery noises across a vast distance. My elf ears are on
full alert. It's Ricardo's turn. Let's see if Ricardo can roll well enough
to notice Nala turning into a were wolf. We're spending a momentum because Ricardo
was a coward. I mean, someone's gotta because we know col Aim like
to go on record that I'm sleeping through this, all right, right,
but show wants succice nice, Yeah, all right. Octimer noticed nothing,
Ricardo, notice nothing. Seems to be pretty quiet night. That's good.
Every so often, Ricardo's casting an eye up at the moon to see those
things flying about, but none of them seem to be going terribly far away
from the blooming building in the distance. Now it's time for twinkle toes,
who spends a fourteen point to start dan off. I'm dancing, Dad,
I'm dancing. So that's six successes. Oh my god, Jesus Christ,
that's what we call over kill myself about the time he took his watch,
seriously, I usually do. All it took was sleeping with a werewolf for
him to actually pay attention to usually do. Take my watch, motherfucker,
you failed more watches than I cow only failed one. Singing and dancing during
your watches, for God's sake, there's really good news about those six successes.
Excellent call sees the net right before it starts to drop over his head,
with enough time to let out a screen. I mean, they haven't
technically gotten away with me. Yet they of kidnapping you are in a net.
Yeah, but like the minute they tell me this shit's going on Fishman
Tube, I'm letting it happen. Do you have to pay for Fishman Tube?
No, that's why it's gotta happen. Man, it is free to
all ancient wizards. God so made the God's rest call soul. Then I'm
sorry, buddy, some of us have to take the hell on this one.
Well, it's true that while you are in the Valley of the Lost
Souls, you do get free Wi Fi from this evil wizard. So that
is that's pretty ill. If only any one of us had a cell phone
in the fucking Cone antimes, that'd be good news. Wi Fi in this
case stands for a wizard fizzard. What's fizzard? I don't know. You
have to be a wizard to know, but it ain't cell phone related.
At least that is good news. This is excellent. You can get fish
Tube on it, apparently, So yeah, dude, not just fish Tube.
Soon you're gonna be able to get SNYD on there too. Gotta fizzard
up some fish Tube and what should all happen? Like magic? So we'd
probably prepare ourselves for a scuffle. Huh. The sad part is Zube is
gonna throw all this out even though it's canonical and true. I know then,
why would he throw it out? What a faster? Yeah? What
an actual piece of garbage? Super? What a fish faster? Right?
No, that's what That's what's gonna have later. Fish. Those those children
are not They are all recognized to buy their fish. Epherd himself. Carl
doesn't strike me as a deadbeat dad. He's gonna do the right thing in
this situation. I mean, they're so chances are I'm not going to be
involved in the actual process. What do you know about fish people? Is
he already planning on dipping? I thought he was on the up and up.
Who made you the authority on fish people? That's what I want to
know. The guy who netted me? Okay, he swore you in and
I was like, you look trustworthy. You now get to speak for the
fish people. Yeah, I'm the lore ax. I speak for them.
A fucking fish I think. I think needs to make a lore roll about
fish people. Apparently it's free. He doesn't have to make it. Nobody
knows better if it sucks that sometimes ship sneaks into your game that you had
nothing to do. Okay, in my defense, I didn't put that there,
so I can't speak for all situations, just my own. I guess
we should try and figure out what everybody wants to do about Snidely getting dragged
away in a net. I'm sorry, Carl getting dragged away in a net.
We haven't dragged Snidely in a net yet. That's for Patreon only content.
That's only sign up for our non existent patreons. I know Ricardo is
any. I mean, if Cole was able to get a warning out,
Ricardo is getting battle ready, getting a sword and shield out, and if
he is able to see col getting netted, you know, yeh assisting that
situation. I mean, you guys are all just wearing If you're wearing armor,
you're just wearing leather. So I'm sure it's fine that you could probably
astuze in it. It's not like hardened it's it's not boiled leathers. It's
just fresh ape gator skin. In my case, nothing gets me. She
used like fresh ape though. All right, so I've got good news and
bad news. The good news is initiative defaults to the players unless I spend
doom. The bad news is I'm spending doom. Look at this motherfucker running
away exactly what I wanted to hear. I love it, no chance whatsoever
to act. Sorry for failm that perception. Check Listen, he didn't notice
anybody sneaking up on him because they had already stuck up during somebody else's watch.
Wait, they got you know, they got into position on my watch,
and unfortunately you had to prayer the front of that mistake. Yeah,
it's pretty chill, all right. So I withdraw a doom from the imaginary
pool, and the gentleman with the net, the gentle fish boy with the
net, is going to take his action to drag the net as far away
as he can as the others rush forward to form a defensive line. Okay,
in the dim light, you cannot be entirely sure, but you do
see, do you guys mind if I try first? You know, I
need you to open a line, open a hole in the line so I
can get our boy called. That is my plan. I'm just gonna shoot
the man with the net networks too. If you can see him. That'd
be sick. That'd be dope. All right, you see eight of them?
Oh big oh show all right? That too many? Too many?
Also not we can't get hit, We're fucked. That's true. Okay,
So is it argo? Yep? All right? Opening round was a net
boy running away and then the line. Yeah yeah, yeah, the line
was flavor. That's why I only spent one doom because only the net guy
moved. So I assume standing and drawing my bow is gonna be my first
action and that leaves me no time to aim. Yep, yeah, that'll
be in place of your your minor action, so I do gain a bonus
momentumn range attacks, so I'll be doing my trick shot. I assume they're
gonna be either close or has he moved? What range is he at?
They're close? Actually, if you're targeting the one that's dragging the net,
he's it at medium range. Well that's ideal, so I don't need to
worry about shooting for the horizon the base of a mountain, right, yeah,
yeah, it's not really a mountain, but it's it's steep. It's
steep elevated terrain behind your Yeah, it's not forests, so that's out.
So I am going to make a ranged attack. It's three days to hit.
That's probably fine, right, fortune baby, three day to hit is
better than two days to hit for sure. All right, I'll spend a
load and folly on them. Low your load, you only get one?
What's your nets free? You're up. It's up to you to get out,
man, I can't keep babysitting people. Look at some of the arrows.
You know what? This is important. I'll spend the fucking fortune as
well. Yeah, save in your homie. Oh does that mean our fortune
got? Yeah? Eight successes, So that's what eight dice wordth of damage?
So you needed one? Okay, so that's a good number. So
you have seven successes beyond what you needed. So yeah, I guess if
you want to apply all seven of those to damage, you certainly can.
I'll put one momentum in the pool. Okay, so get it started.
So yeah, six extra Oh my god, Wait a minute, Wait a
minute. You have fearsome uh huh and piercing, so I have effects to
start with. So we're gonna ignore five points of armor. Well, I
hope he's fired armor just because I want to fuck him. Uh, his
scales count as armor? Oh good? Well? Shit, except in this
instance, I guess, holy shit, So that seven more dice, is
that what you're telling me? You roll one more combat dice, you got
a one, So that's one extra point of damage. So that is thirteen
points of damage ignoring their entire armor. I feel like I'm gonna be targeted
after this. Really, now run we want kill me, all right?
So Octimer springs his feet in the darkness and he sleeps with one of his
quivers propped up next to him. So he gets to his feet and the
quiver is on the ground propped up, and he can just start drawing arrows
and just a blur, just raining them down. All of his years needing
to respond quickly to border raids by the Picts apparently prepared him for this exact
kind of scenario. That's all I can hear in my head. The Picts
are coming. So this thing dragging the net, you see. One arrow
takes it in one of the giant, bulbous eyes. It's jaws snap open
to scream, and another arrow takes it straight in the back of its mouth.
The head snaps back in a third arrow into its throat, and it's
just jelly's out, just collapses Dead Special thanks to Toys and Things in dan
Versus, Massachusetts, Reaper Miniatures, Off the Wall Games and Hadley, Massachusetts,
Games and Friends in Springfield, Massachusetts, as well as Triple A Games
Arena in Wilbraham, Massachusetts. If you enjoy the show, help the podcast
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