WEBVTT

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Hello, fire Escape Cast listeners.
This is Dan Reichord. Hey, you

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might have seen an episode pop up
in your feed today and you thought,

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hey, wait a minute, it's
every other week and we just had one

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last week. While I'm here to
tell you to calm down. It's okay.

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Everything is wrong with your phone and
your internet connection. I just put

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up a bonus episode here because my
father, Paul Reichord, was in town

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last weekend and we sat on the
deck for three hours and we recorded a

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long, unabridged, unedited conversation about
a whole lot of things. If you

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want to see the video, it's
up on my YouTube. But figure it.

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Hey, it's an off week on
fire Escape Cast here, why don't

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we go ahead and upload that here
if you're looking for something to listen to.

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So, without further ado, here
is me and my dad on a

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deck. One thing I forgot to
do on this trip. What's that zip

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Hop? Well, look it's not
zip Hop without the lyrics. So hit

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him, come on, hit him
with the pop hid him with this.

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I'm not inspired yet. That's where
it gets intolerable. It's a lot of

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My name is Paul, and I'm
here to say sixty year old white guy

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thought like, this is what you
think rap is type stuff. It's great.

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I'm sitting by the fire. No, no, no, don't do

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it without zipp hopping. The people
will love it. No, you you

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got time it right. I'm sitting
by the fire. It's my life's desire

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with my son named Dan. He's
my one um, one man. What

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do you think he does this a
lot? He has three kids. We

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all hate it, and we've all
told him in no uncertain terms that it's

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insufferable. No one likes it,
not even in a funny way. It's

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just hard to get through and we
wish he would stop. Why do you

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think I do it? That's a
shoot a shoot? Do you know what

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that means? It's a wrestling thing. Oh, look at you, it's

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capabe whoa look at you? Go
we already? Or take your jacket off

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amidst this roaring flame. I needed
earlier, I don't need it now.

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Yeah, the fire mix things hot. So, uh, general topics?

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What are we doing here? We're
just talking. We could sum up the

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week. Yeah. Here, let's
start with something you said at Fenway Park.

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So, Dad, you're here in
town. It's your sixtieth birthday was

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yesterday, two days ago, Thursday, Thursday. It is now Saturday.

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You said something. One of my
favorite things you do is say things with

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the utmost confidence and certainty that are
just factually incorrect. Let me hit you

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with this one, because we said
there's gonna be more to unpack here.

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You said at the game we were
talking about Boston accents, and you were

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saying, that's, oh, yeah, you know you're from You're from a

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place that doesn't have an accent.
And it's like, I think I said

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that when I was like twelve and
I was I was Someone told me like,

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oh, well, no, you
just think that because that's you grew

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up hearing that, and you're like, no, no, no, it's

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just we don't have an accent.
We have just the default accents. You

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know why you think it's the default, right, because it's mine, right,

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and that's all you've heard growing up. Let me ask you this,

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sure, do folks hard with hardcore
like Boston accents? Do they not think

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they have an accent? They probably
think they have a Boston accent, right,

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And we have a Midwestern accent which
doesn't exist. Why because there's no

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irregular pronunciations of anything. What is
irregular? The cat going to the cat

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and the yah. But do you
think that's irregular or someone from Boston or

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Sath I don't know, y'all.
Do you think that's irregular to someone from

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the South talking like that if you
were born in Atlanta? No, because

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they know they speak with the Southern
accent, just like we speak with a

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Midwestern accent. That doesn't exist.
You have to have why why is it

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difference? Why is it different from
the Midwest? Something has to exist in

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order to have it. What does
that mean? It's too deep for you?

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No, this is you realize you
have no idea what you're talking about.

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You really do believe that, because
here's here's the difference. I think

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a lot of times I do things
as bits, and a lot of people

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are like, does he actually think
that? So I'm asking straight up,

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do you believe this? Yes,
you believe that we don't have a Midwestern

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accent because that doesn't exist. Yes, there's nothing we say. We don't

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say anything in a way that's peculiar. But what determines what's peculiar? You

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know, if it's not said the
way it's intended to be said, how

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is it intended to be said,
Like the word automobile is supposed to be

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automobile. In England, it would
be an automobile. And do you think

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a person in England would think that's
peculiar? How I said that? How

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they would say it? Right?
No, because they know they have British

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accents, right, and we should
know that we have Midwestern accent. That's

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the thing he has to exist to
have it. What does that mean?

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What are you talking about? You
can't have a Midwest accent when there's no

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accent to have. Oh, I'll
die on this hill. I don't know

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for getting past. It's like North
Dakota, Minnesota. Man in Minnesota,

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right, if you asked Tim Terry
if he thought it was weird or peculiar,

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he says broom instead of broom.
Well, no, that's that's how

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you'd be like, Oh, yeah, I've got the Minnesota in accent.

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So let me ask you this.
Yes, if you say Minnesota like Minnesota

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or Minnesota, which is the one
with an accent? Well, to me,

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someone who grew up in Kansas,
Minnesota is the Minnesota accents. So

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you don't think people from Minnesota who
say Minnesota like that realize that they say

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it differently than everyone else. Who's
everyone else outside the Midwest or outside of

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that region? Right? Can they
hear us? Yes, there's a billion

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microphones here. Yes, Yes,
we got the roaring fire here. It's

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not that loud, it's just fire, all right. I'm right on this

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really. Yeah. Let us know
in the comments, folks, genuinely,

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if you agree with him, let
them know. If you don't, let

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them know. I'm curious. Here's
the thing. If this video came out

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and it was unanimously people thought you
were wrong, would you reconsider No.

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I think that's the thing. I
think it's like, in the face of

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being wrong about it. When was
the last time you feel you were totally

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wrong about something and your mind was
changed because you learn more. Oh,

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it's happened. Yeah, can you
think of a There's been times in my

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life. It's been a while,
but when I was younger when I was

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pronouncing a word completely incorrectly, Yeah, and someone would point out to me

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and explain to me the right way
to say it, and I recognized I

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was wrong and I corrected it,
and I haven't done that way since.

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Yeah, that's like a right or
wrong like pronoun that's like a binary thing.

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This is like a concept that I
think you're failing to understand. I'd

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have to go. I'll think about
that throughout the night, and I'll get

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back with you, Okay. I
when I was a young man, I

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was like most young people. I
thought I knew everything. It turns out

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I really didn't know much. Yeah, but I used to have this saying

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that if you ever get if you
ever get into an argument or a debate

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with me, know that you're wrong, because I will not engage in a

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debate or an argument unless I know
one hundred percent that I'm right. And

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I've I've shifted that. Now I'll
accept the fact that I could be wrong.

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But I used to not if I
got into something unless I knew I

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was right. Yeah, I wouldn't
push it. I feel like I have.

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I have not changed all my opinions, but I feel like just the

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way I've thought about things in most
every regard that matters has changed since like

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college, in terms of just like
what matters in life, like just things

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that like in college, I would
say with the utmost, like if you

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don't like Bubb Dylan, you're an
idiot. You know, it's like that

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type of stuff. I've softened so
much. You've got a lot better about

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that. Well, yeah, just
because it's just I don't know. I

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think you just meet enough people and
you realize how like abrasive that can be

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and things like that, and you
you recalibrate. You know, I did

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think of an example. Well you
know this, but nobody else will.

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I grew up in an environment where
and an environment and a time where most

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women did not work. Oh,
your mom was an very and this My

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mom was the root of this.
She was very negative about any woman that

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worked. And once I got out
in the world on my own, got

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married, started having my own family, and realizing what there was more to

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life than my hometown. You realize
that the most people need to incomes to

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survive. Sure, sure, and
there's nothing wrong with that. In fact,

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it's admirable that anybody wants to work
is out there working, and that

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things that you might have just accepted
as gospel because like a parent told you,

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at a certain time, it was
like yeah, yeah, Well,

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and as you get older, you
learn that everything you were taught wasn't necessarily

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correct. There's a fun reason when
I learned back in the day growing up,

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you had very strong thoughts about wine
and the drinkers of wine and their

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hoity tweetiness and so forth. I, I know, drink wine on a

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regular basis. What do you think
of that, mister? I think you're

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proving me right that I'm hoity toity. You're you're veering towards hoity toity.

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You are the only person on the
planet. I think that accuses me being

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hoity toity. You were calling these
elite coastal pants earlier because I had three

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pockets. Hoity toity didn't even used
to be on your GPS. But it's

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it's you're It's not a destination yet, but it's on the GPS. By

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the way, you keep leaning towards
that you don't need to just comfort.

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Wasn't that for comfort? Okay?
Okay, um, so okay, yeah,

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so do you do you not?
You're not headed towards hoity twits,

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You're not in hoity twitty, But
it's on the map. It's an option

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for you to go to give us
your thoughts. And you've changed so much

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in the last ten years, mostly
for the better, mostly for the better.

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Uh. But you're and you're so
a fairly young man, So you're

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changing so the being a wine scarf
guy, I'm sorry, what please elaborate

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on the scarf burnet a scarf and
wine guy? You're you're I'm sorry?

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Have you ever seen me wear a
scarf? And also if I did,

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who gives? I said? Headed
towards Oh, I'm heading towards scarfton.

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Yeah, okay, scarf city here, scarf City USA? All right,

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got it? You are, you're
bandoning your Okay, so let's let's just

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hear the thoughts on wine. Wine's
fine. I do think I do think

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that a lot of people drink wine
because they think it makes them look classier

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than drinking whiskey. All right,
I send to you with us. Do

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you think Mike Mhardy actually enjoys drinking
wine? Yeah? Okay, all right,

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all right, you're not that far
out of the left field here.

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All right. I thought you were
gonna say he's like trying to put on

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airs or something like when he was
born, like his DNA was whitey twitty

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DNA when he was born on the
Lacrosse farm. Yes, yes, okay,

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all right, so you're doing knowledge
that people can enjoy whine. Do

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you think I enjoy wine? Do
you think any part of me? Genuine

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question, do you think any part
of me is putting on airs? No?

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Okay, So why do you think
I'm drinking wine? Because you're not

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wired. Why do you think I'm
drinking wine? It's part of the whole

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evolution you being married. She's not
even a wine. But what are you

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talking about it? It's just the
whole. It's just what you do.

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What was that mean? You do
different ship when you get married and you

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get settled down in domesticated and you
get older, you do I love the

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domesticated thing. Well, there's the
great toilet lid fiasco. It's the greatest

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divide in our relationship in the last
five years is the toilet lid piasco.

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You've got to admit. And again, mostly for the good. Do you

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have changed dramatically? And I think
a lot. She's been really good for

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you. Oh my god. Yeah, you're getting close to resembling an adult,

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whereas before it was even close.
But there are parts of you there

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are a lot more adults. And
do you think if I hadn't gotten married,

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like I think, you ascribe a
lot of things and changes to getting

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married. You definitely have your thoughts
on marriage and Jenner. Marriage is a

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life changer and a lot of right, do you think I would have changed?

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Like if I didn't get married?
Do you think i'd be the exact

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same as when I was twenty five? No? Right? But you wouldn't

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be the sec same as you are
now? Well? Sure, I mean

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every big life thing changes. You
wouldn't be drinking wine, you don't think

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so? So wait, so you
directly think I'm drinking wine because I got

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married. I think it's a result
of a by of you becoming married and

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older and set part of that and
settled down, which she's not even really

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a drinker, right, Why would
that has changed part of the whole settling

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down and being not a wild man
drinker and being more sophisticated. You drink

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right full, drink ten button lights
in a fucking stream and fart six times

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on a stream and play donkey kock. I'm worried about seeming like adultery,

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But twenty years ago you would have
drink forty lights and farted sixty times.

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That's I guess I am. It's
not an overnight thing. Okay, I

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guess it's. Yeah. The fart
scale is a is a gradual. It's

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a gradual thing. That's right.
That's right. Again, I could be

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wrong. Do you think you are
largely different than you were ten years ago?

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Yeah? Not in any good ways? Yeah yeah, yeah, yeah.

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What do you think? What are
the what are the key things?

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Do you think I've become far less
social? Yeah? I mean ten years

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ago you weren't exactly like you were. Pretty it was the beginning of the

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downfall, I mean yeah, yeah, the homebody thing, the not wanting

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to do anything. I feel like
you were deep into that about ten years

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00:13:07.159 --> 00:13:11.799
ago. Yeah, everything radically changed
for me when I retired from the post

204
00:13:11.840 --> 00:13:15.720
office. That was the thing I
was concerned. It was the structure.

205
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The taking the structure out of my
life wasn't good. That was the thing.

206
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I remember you talking to me when
you were considering it, and I

207
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remember telling you on the phone that
I could see it going one of two

208
00:13:24.120 --> 00:13:28.159
ways. I could see it either
being well, this could be really really

209
00:13:28.159 --> 00:13:30.320
good for you. You now have
all this time because people, it was

210
00:13:30.360 --> 00:13:33.399
a hard fucking job. You were
busting her, especially during like holiday seasons

211
00:13:33.399 --> 00:13:35.519
and stuff and time consuming exactly.
Yeah, So I thought like, Okay,

212
00:13:35.559 --> 00:13:39.360
either this is gonna be you now
have all this time, and you're

213
00:13:39.360 --> 00:13:41.360
gonna like, you know, you're
gonna find hobbies and passions and go on

214
00:13:41.440 --> 00:13:46.200
vacations and travel and stuff. Or
I withdrew into myself, that's the thing,

215
00:13:46.240 --> 00:13:50.240
And like I think I knew that
inclination that you already had. And

216
00:13:50.440 --> 00:13:54.720
the other big thing is physically,
Oh yeah, I mean because I didn't

217
00:13:54.759 --> 00:13:58.000
I didn't have a walking route.
I did most of the work in the

218
00:13:58.039 --> 00:14:01.440
truck, but I was on my
feet for half the day and and physically

219
00:14:01.440 --> 00:14:07.000
active all day. And then I
just I mean, there was a period

220
00:14:07.039 --> 00:14:09.399
of a or nine years, right, I didn't exercise, like barely did

221
00:14:09.559 --> 00:14:13.919
anything physical. Well, that's one
area I want to give you credit.

222
00:14:13.399 --> 00:14:18.919
Very recently, like in the last
year or so. Is that something happened

223
00:14:18.080 --> 00:14:20.279
and you decided he didn't want to
feel like that anymore, and you have

224
00:14:20.320 --> 00:14:24.000
actually started. You've got a gym
membership, and we're being proud of you,

225
00:14:24.039 --> 00:14:26.399
but being like, oh okay,
now you actually have to go.

226
00:14:26.799 --> 00:14:30.120
And I knew that because you are
such a creature habit and you fear changed

227
00:14:30.200 --> 00:14:31.799
that like if you could just turn
it into a habit, and like I

228
00:14:31.879 --> 00:14:35.120
know, like, look, I'm
no fucking athlete. I need to work

229
00:14:35.159 --> 00:14:37.919
out way more than I do.
It's it's the hardest part is getting it,

230
00:14:37.320 --> 00:14:39.360
making it a habit. But once
you do, yeah, and that's

231
00:14:39.360 --> 00:14:41.440
a struggle every time I do it. But yeah, but you're you're doing

232
00:14:41.480 --> 00:14:43.200
it now, yeah, three times
a week. Yeah. And I even

233
00:14:43.200 --> 00:14:45.919
said, right when I saw you
on this trip, it's like, oh

234
00:14:45.960 --> 00:14:48.600
we should that's uh. I noticed
because like I used to get concerned when

235
00:14:48.679 --> 00:14:50.919
you know, you'd get halfway up
a flight of stairs and have to like

236
00:14:50.960 --> 00:14:54.519
sit down and like we's basically or
go to the mailbox and get winded.

237
00:14:54.639 --> 00:14:58.320
You know, like now you're you're
cardio like walking around Boston and stuff,

238
00:14:58.360 --> 00:15:01.600
like we to walk it. It's
definitely better. Yeah. Yeah, does

239
00:15:01.600 --> 00:15:05.320
it just feel good? Yeah?
I just got tired of feeling like shit.

240
00:15:05.639 --> 00:15:09.240
Yeah yeah, that's all that was. Yeah. I had that membership

241
00:15:09.480 --> 00:15:13.120
what five six years ago, and
I was paying for it every month,

242
00:15:13.159 --> 00:15:16.120
not min It's ten bucks a month, which is insane. I don't know

243
00:15:16.120 --> 00:15:18.600
how the fuck every other gym is
like eighty dollars a month and plan A

244
00:15:18.639 --> 00:15:22.120
Fitness is ten. That's where the
Midwest is awesome. They planet fitnesses here

245
00:15:22.440 --> 00:15:24.039
like East coast. They can't be
ten bucks. I think they are.

246
00:15:24.480 --> 00:15:28.399
Really, Yes, are we sponsored? Can we be? Yeah? But

247
00:15:28.440 --> 00:15:31.919
he takes three hours to get there
in traffic, and if you don't have

248
00:15:31.960 --> 00:15:35.879
a car, it's fifty bucks in
an uber. Jesus you look. Big

249
00:15:35.919 --> 00:15:39.480
cities should just call themselves Welcome to
the big City. Anywhere you want to

250
00:15:39.519 --> 00:15:43.759
go forty five minutes fifty bucks.
I just every funk that we're just in

251
00:15:43.840 --> 00:15:48.039
Boston only two days. Every bar
we go to, every time you go

252
00:15:48.120 --> 00:15:50.559
to order a drink, oh,
let's take a bud of light. What

253
00:15:50.720 --> 00:15:54.279
is that? Eighteen dollars? Four
bartenders has been like, ah, I

254
00:15:54.279 --> 00:16:00.200
don't set the prices. It's just
ridiculous. Yeah. I look today went

255
00:16:00.200 --> 00:16:03.879
to a barbecue place and uh,
the ladies like, oh any any allergies?

256
00:16:03.320 --> 00:16:07.879
Just high prices. God, they
love pull the string on you.

257
00:16:08.000 --> 00:16:12.279
It's like it's too expensive. They
love waitresses, love old guys making jokes,

258
00:16:12.519 --> 00:16:17.279
oh god about things they can't control. Right. We came up with

259
00:16:17.279 --> 00:16:21.879
a new character in Boston, what
cookie guy? Cookie guy? Oh in

260
00:16:21.960 --> 00:16:26.799
Boston and a chief Predator picture because
literally just every single thing you do,

261
00:16:27.559 --> 00:16:32.559
every single thing you buy, it's
just uh too expensive. Too. It's

262
00:16:32.559 --> 00:16:34.960
showing. I don't know how many
times I heard you say what don't say?

263
00:16:34.960 --> 00:16:41.360
Where I live my wikipedia, you
would say every time. If I

264
00:16:41.399 --> 00:16:45.039
was back in Kansas, goose and
gander, goose and gander, goose and

265
00:16:45.120 --> 00:16:48.320
gander. What does that mean?
What? What is that? What's good

266
00:16:48.320 --> 00:16:52.360
for the goose is good for the
gander? What is it? What are

267
00:16:52.360 --> 00:16:56.440
you talking about? Everybody else knows? Sure? Okay, Oh, if

268
00:16:56.480 --> 00:17:00.320
I was back in Kansas, I
could spend ten cents in cass I could

269
00:17:00.320 --> 00:17:03.319
go to McDonald's. It's spend four
dollars on a meal. It's delicious,

270
00:17:03.359 --> 00:17:07.359
check and it fills me up.
It's even got a drink check. But

271
00:17:07.680 --> 00:17:11.200
every single time, but here would
be thirty bucks or yeah, but like,

272
00:17:11.240 --> 00:17:14.759
why even travel if that's how you
liked, stay home and e McDonald

273
00:17:14.880 --> 00:17:17.759
don't travel the big cities. That's
the thing. If you quit moving these

274
00:17:17.759 --> 00:17:19.599
big cities, I'd quit. Definitely
go to live in Boston. You wanted

275
00:17:19.640 --> 00:17:26.240
to go there? Ah, jeez, are you when I'm when I'm used

276
00:17:26.240 --> 00:17:30.480
to going out to lunch by myself
and I can literally get a great meal

277
00:17:30.559 --> 00:17:33.079
for six bucks, and then all
of a sudden, every lunch I have

278
00:17:33.119 --> 00:17:36.880
a sixty bucks. I mean we
still have McDonald You don't think I'm supposed

279
00:17:36.880 --> 00:17:37.799
to balk with that. I mean
we still have me. But I mean,

280
00:17:38.200 --> 00:17:41.920
here's the difference. I feel like
you, even when traveling or especially

281
00:17:41.920 --> 00:17:45.200
when you're home, like, you're
not the type that like, oh,

282
00:17:45.240 --> 00:17:48.160
i'll treat myself. I'll go out
and I'll get like a nice meal or

283
00:17:48.200 --> 00:17:51.559
something. I'm not talking some Michelin
Star one hundred dollars meal or anything like

284
00:17:51.599 --> 00:17:53.599
that. I'm saying going out and
spending twenty four dollars on a dinner and

285
00:17:53.680 --> 00:17:57.000
set of four dollars, it's ridiculous. So you don't see the value in

286
00:17:57.079 --> 00:18:00.799
it. No why because you and
you're hungry, you get the meal,

287
00:18:00.960 --> 00:18:04.839
you're not hungry anymore, the same
result. You can do it for five

288
00:18:04.839 --> 00:18:08.440
bucks or fifty, So for you, it's it's purely utilitarian. Wow,

289
00:18:08.440 --> 00:18:14.839
look at you with a thirty dollar
words thirty dollars words. Yeah, it's

290
00:18:14.839 --> 00:18:18.880
all about the money. So you
never like, oh, I'm gonna treat

291
00:18:18.920 --> 00:18:21.119
myself and get this thing. Cost
a little more, but I'm gonna get

292
00:18:21.119 --> 00:18:26.559
this. Occasionally I will splurge and
do uber eats, but that's more a

293
00:18:26.680 --> 00:18:30.960
root of convenience, convenience and laziness. So it's never just like I want

294
00:18:30.960 --> 00:18:33.480
to get a step, like,
but I love McDonald's that I won't do

295
00:18:33.519 --> 00:18:36.920
that often. Yeah, but you
know I love McDonald's. And I know

296
00:18:36.960 --> 00:18:38.319
you think I'm like hoity toity now
or whatever, but like I'm still eat

297
00:18:38.359 --> 00:18:42.000
McDonald's and Taco Bell and Popeyes and
shit like very very frequently, like at

298
00:18:42.039 --> 00:18:45.119
least once a week, right,
Like, but I also like to occasionally

299
00:18:45.240 --> 00:18:47.839
like, oh, you know,
we're gonna go out to like a nice

300
00:18:47.880 --> 00:18:51.880
restaurant stuff. Oh god, something
made a sound. If it wasn't that,

301
00:18:52.000 --> 00:18:55.720
it's that one, I'll go checho
quick. I'm kind of digital coyote

302
00:18:55.799 --> 00:19:03.160
or something. Digital digital coyote.
That's right, everyone loves the digital coyotes.

303
00:19:03.200 --> 00:19:04.960
They're really good. Yes, you
should have seen him before they were

304
00:19:06.039 --> 00:19:07.680
playing a rat is sure, of
course, seen him in the clubs.

305
00:19:07.720 --> 00:19:11.559
That's where the yeah, that's where
the magic was. Yeah yeah, yeah.

306
00:19:12.200 --> 00:19:15.680
But you're hungry fulfill the need.
You don't have to spend fifty bucks

307
00:19:15.680 --> 00:19:21.480
to do it. List I'm with
you, and the thing with you that's

308
00:19:21.480 --> 00:19:26.920
triply infuriating is you do your that
phrase your eyes are bigger than your stomach.

309
00:19:26.079 --> 00:19:30.079
Oh sure, sure, so true. With you, you almost always

310
00:19:30.200 --> 00:19:33.319
order way more than can you eat, and then you get those it's a

311
00:19:33.440 --> 00:19:36.920
ritual. Now at this point,
you get the star from box bringing home

312
00:19:37.440 --> 00:19:40.279
and then it never gets eaten and
it gets thrown away. And it's because

313
00:19:40.279 --> 00:19:41.759
I hate wasting food. I do
too. I do two. I hate

314
00:19:41.799 --> 00:19:44.799
it. And it's like if it
wasn't like a traveling thing where it's like

315
00:19:44.920 --> 00:19:47.119
on a time limit, then like
I don't think I would do that.

316
00:19:47.240 --> 00:19:51.440
I think it's with you. We
get appetizers when we go out, and

317
00:19:51.480 --> 00:19:55.119
I think it's the beers too.
Well, yeah, but I'm talking more

318
00:19:55.119 --> 00:19:56.839
about like the appetizers like fill me
up and like normally like monk and I

319
00:19:56.880 --> 00:20:00.839
aren't going to like you know,
family feed farm places where it's given me

320
00:20:00.839 --> 00:20:03.319
like twenty pounds of macaroni and cheese
or whatever. So like it's too much

321
00:20:03.319 --> 00:20:06.759
food now that is on me.
I need to like not order as much

322
00:20:06.839 --> 00:20:08.799
appetizers. And it's a lot of
it's the drinks because I don't I mean,

323
00:20:08.839 --> 00:20:11.240
it's just a different way of doing
things. That's fine, but I

324
00:20:11.319 --> 00:20:15.680
don't like to drink alcohol when I
eat. Yeah, and so I'll usually

325
00:20:15.720 --> 00:20:21.000
just get water and usually get a
couple six dollars beers. What is the

326
00:20:21.079 --> 00:20:26.519
right price for a beer? Three
fifty max? Three fifty max. Yeah,

327
00:20:26.519 --> 00:20:27.839
okay, like regular, like not
on sale. I mean my standard

328
00:20:27.960 --> 00:20:30.559
used to be. I mean Bars
Veussels twenty years ago, used to be

329
00:20:30.599 --> 00:20:33.359
you could get a beer for two
bucks. Oh I was in college,

330
00:20:33.480 --> 00:20:37.920
or in dollars seventy five of those
giant schooners Louisa's college town. Yeah,

331
00:20:37.400 --> 00:20:41.200
I love it. Seems like something
that's annoyed you more as time's gone on

332
00:20:41.440 --> 00:20:45.200
is the selection of beers because you
only need like two. I remember I

333
00:20:45.200 --> 00:20:49.359
looked at a drink menu and Boston
you're just like, uh than I knew

334
00:20:49.359 --> 00:20:52.720
would never look at a drink menu. He would just point and say,

335
00:20:52.759 --> 00:20:55.160
give me a beer and take one
of the four beers that there should be.

336
00:20:55.200 --> 00:20:56.519
And like it's true, you really, I know, you really don't

337
00:20:56.559 --> 00:21:00.240
like it when beers have weird names. You told me, hmm, my

338
00:21:00.279 --> 00:21:04.000
friend's son drinks a beer called yoga
pants. Oh, this one says kitten

339
00:21:04.119 --> 00:21:07.319
something. It was that kittens and
cookies or something something. That there's a

340
00:21:07.319 --> 00:21:11.640
billion beers. They can't be good
I mean, I don't know. I'm

341
00:21:11.680 --> 00:21:15.920
not like a crap beer guy,
despite what you think. Not a crap

342
00:21:15.000 --> 00:21:18.720
beer guy. Bacalar, Oh my
god, I would love to hear you.

343
00:21:18.880 --> 00:21:25.359
Backlar would kill you. Me and
back Lar and Broadway Alex should all

344
00:21:25.400 --> 00:21:30.000
go out, go out some time, and Jeff order fancy beer and won't

345
00:21:30.000 --> 00:21:33.519
be able to go there because there
was a chicken there in nineteen eighty.

346
00:21:33.559 --> 00:21:37.759
You know, he'll sing about it. Oh, the beer is so expensive

347
00:21:37.799 --> 00:21:45.559
and there's so many choices. What
should we do about the beer? Shut

348
00:21:45.640 --> 00:21:51.079
up theater? Good, shut up
Alex an order or something. Backlard it's

349
00:21:51.079 --> 00:21:53.160
like Backlar. I feel like it's
like one if it's like Backlar's like pinball

350
00:21:53.319 --> 00:21:59.160
hockey and uh and like being a
beer enthusiast, Like every time I drink,

351
00:21:59.200 --> 00:22:00.839
every time i'm drinking light or if
I order by light, Backlar will

352
00:22:00.880 --> 00:22:03.640
always tell me, like, oh, you might as well just say I'll

353
00:22:03.640 --> 00:22:04.839
have a glass of piss. I'll
drink my own piss. I'll just it's

354
00:22:04.839 --> 00:22:07.480
just like that's all because that's where
you're drinking. It's just pee. It's

355
00:22:07.480 --> 00:22:11.279
just piss. Like, what are
your thoughts on that it tastes good.

356
00:22:11.279 --> 00:22:14.960
That makes me go ah. After
about six of them, I will say

357
00:22:15.079 --> 00:22:18.440
I am with you on this again, despite what you have concocted in your

358
00:22:18.440 --> 00:22:22.119
head about me being a coastal elite
beer snub. I drink to get drunk,

359
00:22:22.240 --> 00:22:23.480
that is it. But I think
there are fun ways to mix it

360
00:22:23.559 --> 00:22:27.319
up. I think I think that
like trying different flavors of beer or messing

361
00:22:27.319 --> 00:22:30.480
around with wine and stuff like that. It's just a fun different path that

362
00:22:30.559 --> 00:22:33.720
I'm used to. I think that's
that's a difference. I like that.

363
00:22:33.799 --> 00:22:36.799
I like the different paths. I
like like experiencing as much as that stuff

364
00:22:36.799 --> 00:22:38.880
as possible. I think you find
something that agrees with you, and you

365
00:22:38.920 --> 00:22:44.039
were like, I am gonna walk
this fucking trail and stomp it down flat

366
00:22:44.160 --> 00:22:47.160
and only stay on this trailer,
right, am I wrong? I'm not

367
00:22:47.200 --> 00:22:48.000
saying you're right or wrong or anything. I'm just saying this is how you

368
00:22:48.000 --> 00:22:52.039
are right. Yeah. Yeah,
but they've been got it. You have

369
00:22:52.119 --> 00:22:59.440
to admit that there are some people
who drink off the wall beers and and

370
00:22:59.640 --> 00:23:03.880
and just to show hey, I'm
different, I'm like in a replacement for

371
00:23:03.920 --> 00:23:07.680
a personality. It's like I'm the
beer guy. Yeah, I'm sure,

372
00:23:07.759 --> 00:23:11.000
Yeah, I'm sure there's I think
with any fandom, with any hobby,

373
00:23:11.079 --> 00:23:14.039
I think there's always that like,
oh I want to, but not everyone.

374
00:23:14.119 --> 00:23:15.319
So a lot of people just genuinely
like the thing, and I don't

375
00:23:15.319 --> 00:23:19.720
think that's you. All right,
all right, Oh, there's enough idiot

376
00:23:19.799 --> 00:23:23.480
left in you the last lifetime.
You'll be fine. I've been getting ship

377
00:23:23.640 --> 00:23:27.079
for eight years for ordering a blue
moon. You've got an idiot reservoir.

378
00:23:27.200 --> 00:23:30.359
That's huge. They're not gonna have
blue moon this bar, this is a

379
00:23:30.400 --> 00:23:33.799
real bar in Kransas. They're not
gonna have a blue moon. I'll have

380
00:23:33.839 --> 00:23:37.160
a blue moon. Okay, that'll
be four dollars. That's the key.

381
00:23:37.160 --> 00:23:41.240
It was four dollars, oh instead
of three fifty. No, that's fine.

382
00:23:41.599 --> 00:23:45.119
That's just not stupid, like twelve
dollars. I used to talking about,

383
00:23:45.160 --> 00:23:48.519
like old dependings and stuff. I
used to like be very in college.

384
00:23:48.519 --> 00:23:52.559
I'd be like, I'm never paying
there's no reason to ever pay over

385
00:23:52.640 --> 00:23:55.440
twenty dollars for piece of clothing.
I'm never gonna do enough for a shure.

386
00:23:55.640 --> 00:23:57.160
You can get a pair of shoes
for twenty dollars. I can get

387
00:23:57.160 --> 00:24:02.440
a meal. A meal should never
cost more than eight, maybe ten dollars.

388
00:24:02.680 --> 00:24:06.160
I was so everyone with an ear
shot I would never shut up about.

389
00:24:06.160 --> 00:24:11.839
It's like, oh, I s
sixty year old, view is twenty

390
00:24:11.880 --> 00:24:17.039
year old. I still think you're
kind of right. No, you were

391
00:24:17.079 --> 00:24:19.400
saying, what twenty five is your
your shoe limit? No, yeah,

392
00:24:19.400 --> 00:24:23.920
I don't need fancy shoes with an
athlete's name as hats to it athletes name.

393
00:24:26.400 --> 00:24:27.640
I mean you see the tennis shoes
I wear, I've been wear I've

394
00:24:27.640 --> 00:24:30.480
had that pair for like ten years. Man, No, there's nothing wrong

395
00:24:30.480 --> 00:24:33.359
with it. They're still fine.
I put them on my feet and they

396
00:24:33.359 --> 00:24:37.559
take me places and they were like
thirty bucks. I'm just telling me about

397
00:24:37.559 --> 00:24:38.759
a friend that is like a big
sneaker head, and that seems like a

398
00:24:38.880 --> 00:24:42.599
fucking hobby that I feel like,
there are a lot of hobbies that you

399
00:24:42.680 --> 00:24:48.000
don't approve of sneakerheads. Whatever,
I pa, guys, whatever makes you

400
00:24:48.039 --> 00:24:52.079
happy, go for It'll just talk
mountains of ship, but just don't do

401
00:24:52.160 --> 00:24:56.599
it to make it appear that you're
someone that you're not or better than you

402
00:24:56.640 --> 00:25:00.880
are. Sure, sure, okay, I would say that's the thing I

403
00:25:00.920 --> 00:25:03.319
think both of us can lay claim
too. Is that like I don't think

404
00:25:03.319 --> 00:25:06.200
either of us try to be anything
we're not right. Yeah. Yeah,

405
00:25:06.279 --> 00:25:10.519
I think that's a direct result of
my father. I really do. Yeah,

406
00:25:10.640 --> 00:25:11.799
you know, because my dad worked
his ass off and did pretty well

407
00:25:11.839 --> 00:25:15.519
in the grocery business, and but
you would never know it. I remember

408
00:25:17.000 --> 00:25:21.000
he would. He'd walk around with
paint splattered shirts. He always inexplicably had

409
00:25:21.000 --> 00:25:25.319
paint all of himself. I remember
once he was he was so uh He's

410
00:25:25.319 --> 00:25:26.799
like, uh, you got this
friend. I forgot what friend you're talking

411
00:25:26.839 --> 00:25:30.279
was like, she never says I'm
getting in the car. She says,

412
00:25:30.400 --> 00:25:33.079
I'm getting in the Cadillac. I'm
getting in the Cadillac. Like we know

413
00:25:33.119 --> 00:25:36.119
you got a Catillac. Like he
really didn't hate that. Yeah, I

414
00:25:36.119 --> 00:25:37.960
mean on the rare occasion, like
every ten years, my dad get a

415
00:25:38.000 --> 00:25:42.359
new car and he wouldn't take it
to work because he didn't want anybody to

416
00:25:42.519 --> 00:25:47.720
know he was making enough money to
get a new car. He would purposefully

417
00:25:47.960 --> 00:25:49.279
try to make it seem like he
didn't have money take the other car.

418
00:25:49.400 --> 00:25:52.480
Yeah. Really, he didn't want
to put on airs. Yeah, man,

419
00:25:52.519 --> 00:25:56.880
I respect that a lot of that. Grandpa was amazing. He was

420
00:25:56.279 --> 00:25:59.480
one of the best people I've ever
known. He really was. Yeah,

421
00:25:59.519 --> 00:26:02.759
he was fantas es major segue.
Here, we gotta talk about angry cheese

422
00:26:02.839 --> 00:26:07.000
lady. Let me go. You
start telling them and I'll go. Good,

423
00:26:07.039 --> 00:26:11.599
grab some wood, make a joke
about penises. We gotta talk about

424
00:26:11.640 --> 00:26:12.880
my penis. Oh yeah, we
gotta talk about your penis. Hang on,

425
00:26:14.119 --> 00:26:15.839
do you want to set up the
angry cheese lady? Then we'll go

426
00:26:15.880 --> 00:26:18.559
with your penis. One thing I've
learned in sixty years is people love hearing

427
00:26:18.599 --> 00:26:22.279
about my penis. Are you here
here? I want to be here for

428
00:26:22.319 --> 00:26:25.759
the penis talk? So, uh, let me you start talking about angry

429
00:26:25.839 --> 00:26:29.839
cheese lady. I need to go
get some wood. You're you're gonna go

430
00:26:29.880 --> 00:26:32.799
get some wood. I'm gonna go
get some wood. We're rolling. Are

431
00:26:32.799 --> 00:26:41.079
you sure she's still awake? Oh
that was funny. Oh well that was

432
00:26:41.119 --> 00:26:45.039
funnier that. Okay, I smoke
a sagarette off camera, some sigarette on

433
00:26:45.079 --> 00:26:53.480
camera. It's legal smoke high folks. I'm yang without the yang here.

434
00:26:55.319 --> 00:26:59.200
But yeah, Daniel's changed a lot, but it's mostly for the good,

435
00:26:59.240 --> 00:27:03.480
and I give his I've credit for
that. She she has made him quite

436
00:27:03.480 --> 00:27:10.319
a bit more mature and it's it's
fascinating to watch him with her because he's

437
00:27:10.359 --> 00:27:15.359
the most loving, attentive husband I've
ever seen. And it's not even the

438
00:27:15.440 --> 00:27:19.720
honeymoon period anymore. They've been married
quite a while. He's just they're they're

439
00:27:19.720 --> 00:27:26.160
both genuinely, really sweet to each
other. It's good, simultaneously nice and

440
00:27:26.200 --> 00:27:33.279
disgusting to see. But um,
I probably I didn't know. I know,

441
00:27:33.359 --> 00:27:36.559
I never had that type of relationship. But that was totally me because

442
00:27:36.599 --> 00:27:40.960
I was way too selfish. But
this cannot turn into a therapy session anyway.

443
00:27:41.079 --> 00:27:42.559
I was saying nice things about you. Oh my god. They were

444
00:27:42.559 --> 00:27:45.599
all lies. You can't do that
on the internet. They were all lies,

445
00:27:45.640 --> 00:27:49.200
but I was saying them. Oh
are you talking about the cheese lady?

446
00:27:49.559 --> 00:27:52.680
Noah, I want to talk about
my penis and the cheese lady.

447
00:27:52.839 --> 00:27:55.559
Oh yeah, it sounds like a
horrible children's book. Well it's too different

448
00:27:55.559 --> 00:27:57.680
too. I just cut myself open. Come on, that was funny.

449
00:27:57.599 --> 00:28:00.920
Yes, I just cut myself.
What'd you do it? I grabbed some

450
00:28:02.000 --> 00:28:07.839
wood and got a splinter. Oh, the Pinocchio had that problem. I'm

451
00:28:07.039 --> 00:28:15.680
trying to come up with all wooden
character the Pinocchio story, all right,

452
00:28:15.680 --> 00:28:18.359
talking about the cheese ladies. This
is not like a Dylan lyric grabbing some

453
00:28:18.519 --> 00:28:29.119
wood, got a spinny, just
lack oh pinocchio. Cheese lady. I

454
00:28:29.279 --> 00:28:33.680
had a vendor at the at Fenway
Park. Yell at me, and it

455
00:28:33.720 --> 00:28:37.240
wasn't None of it was my fault. Of course. Google ahead, I'm

456
00:28:37.279 --> 00:28:41.160
gonna smoke. Okay, um turns
off. I'm learning now about all the

457
00:28:41.160 --> 00:28:45.279
recording length of all my cameras.
They're all turning off. Um, so

458
00:28:45.000 --> 00:28:49.039
it went for themselves. Yeah,
I guess there's maximum recording times for somebody.

459
00:28:49.359 --> 00:28:52.920
Anyway, We're at Fenway and we
go up to get a couple of

460
00:28:52.920 --> 00:28:56.599
big hot dogs, and uh,
the ladies like, I said, I

461
00:28:56.599 --> 00:29:00.000
want a cup of cheese with my
hot dog. And she felt the cheese

462
00:29:00.079 --> 00:29:03.359
ups and said they're all cold,
but I can. I can squirt some

463
00:29:03.359 --> 00:29:04.559
some hot stuff on it for you. And I was like, yeah,

464
00:29:04.640 --> 00:29:07.240
yeah, that sounds great, And
so she squirts the hot stuff out of

465
00:29:07.279 --> 00:29:11.160
the Toastito's machine onto it and then
she says the dad, Okay, that'll

466
00:29:11.200 --> 00:29:15.319
be eighteen dollars. Do you want
to tip? And he goes no,

467
00:29:15.839 --> 00:29:18.519
and she goes, really, I
sprayed, I gave you free cheese because

468
00:29:18.519 --> 00:29:21.759
there supposed to be three dollars,
but since she did the spray, there

469
00:29:21.799 --> 00:29:23.279
was no charge. And I was
unaware of all that, right, right,

470
00:29:23.759 --> 00:29:26.640
I gave you free cheese, and
you're not gonna tip me? And

471
00:29:26.680 --> 00:29:29.240
you were. You kept saying Boston
people were no nonsense, like they'll,

472
00:29:29.480 --> 00:29:32.079
you know, tell you what they
think. And he was like, oh,

473
00:29:32.119 --> 00:29:33.240
and you pull out your wallet and
all you had was one hundred and

474
00:29:33.279 --> 00:29:36.319
a twenty and you're like, oh, tip you. And she's like,

475
00:29:36.319 --> 00:29:38.240
I can't take that. It's cashless, and so it's just a very awkward

476
00:29:38.279 --> 00:29:42.119
end of that conversation. Well,
first of all, and I think most

477
00:29:42.119 --> 00:29:47.359
people agree with me on this.
Yeah, it's not a price based thing.

478
00:29:47.440 --> 00:29:51.400
It's a location based thing. You
don't tip at the ballpark when you're

479
00:29:51.440 --> 00:29:53.680
buying a hot dog and a soda
or a beer. Um. I will

480
00:29:53.720 --> 00:29:59.200
frequently do a dollar on I don't
know. Usually when there's like a tip

481
00:29:59.240 --> 00:30:00.680
thing, I'll usually at least a
dollar, unless it's like an actual like

482
00:30:00.680 --> 00:30:03.839
service thing, and then I'll always
do twenty plus, you know. But

483
00:30:03.920 --> 00:30:07.880
they're already screwing and it's not the
work. I understand that it's not the

484
00:30:07.920 --> 00:30:10.319
worker doing that. It's higher ups. Butting. I go to a lot

485
00:30:10.319 --> 00:30:11.880
of like wrestling things, and I'll
get a beer and it's like fourteen dollars

486
00:30:11.880 --> 00:30:14.720
for beer, and it's like what
the fuck? But I figured at that

487
00:30:14.720 --> 00:30:17.279
point a dollar more is not gonna
kill me. You know, he'll kill

488
00:30:17.319 --> 00:30:23.720
me. So your penis. Tell
the folks about your penis. Oh,

489
00:30:23.799 --> 00:30:29.119
the tales. I could tell.
What's the what's the worst day your penis

490
00:30:29.119 --> 00:30:34.759
ever had? About a month ago. You're talking like Quint from Jaws.

491
00:30:36.920 --> 00:30:41.640
Tw was a cloudy morning, my
penis was angry. Quit talking like that

492
00:30:41.680 --> 00:30:45.440
and just tell the story. It's
an angry penis day of my friends.

493
00:30:48.359 --> 00:30:51.920
No, I uh, I had
gone to the gym. I usually go

494
00:30:52.039 --> 00:30:56.759
really super early because I get up
early and I'm getting really tired by the

495
00:30:56.799 --> 00:31:00.039
way. Here we go, here
we go. And so anyway, I

496
00:31:00.079 --> 00:31:02.880
went to the gym and I left
the gym, and like always when I

497
00:31:02.880 --> 00:31:07.440
go there, I feel good after
I'm done about myself, which is like

498
00:31:08.400 --> 00:31:14.960
twice a month of currency. So
I was riding a wave and I thought,

499
00:31:14.960 --> 00:31:17.680
well, I'm out, it's a
breakfast time. I might as well

500
00:31:17.680 --> 00:31:19.799
makes money. So I flip on
just greets. I don't know if for

501
00:31:19.839 --> 00:31:22.599
the people who don't know you can. As a driver, you can specify

502
00:31:23.160 --> 00:31:26.839
whether you're want do rides, eats, both, or none. I usually

503
00:31:26.920 --> 00:31:32.960
choose none. I only drive when
I'm in the mood to deal with people,

504
00:31:33.000 --> 00:31:37.680
so I never drive. So I
did Greets and I got this order

505
00:31:37.680 --> 00:31:41.119
from Walmart and it was for two
orders, and I had never picked up

506
00:31:41.119 --> 00:31:44.359
from Walmart before, so I didn't
quite know how it worked. Anyway,

507
00:31:44.440 --> 00:31:48.359
there's a special zone you park in
and then you notify them that you're there

508
00:31:48.359 --> 00:31:52.920
and they bring the order out to
you. Right, So I'm waiting and

509
00:31:52.960 --> 00:31:56.480
I'm waiting and I don't know burp, Sorry, I don't know. I

510
00:31:56.519 --> 00:32:00.839
can't burp. Do you know that
about me? Weird? You're like the

511
00:32:00.839 --> 00:32:02.480
opposite of Kala with that stuff.
Oh my god, super up enough for

512
00:32:02.480 --> 00:32:06.759
both of us. You've seen the
on command thing. It's incredible, right,

513
00:32:07.039 --> 00:32:09.240
so wow? Yeah, yeah,
it's very impressive. Anyway, So

514
00:32:09.279 --> 00:32:14.400
I'm waiting. I'm waiting, and
as I'm waiting, my middle aged bladder

515
00:32:14.440 --> 00:32:15.720
is barking at me, and I'm
realizing that I'm gon aa to go the

516
00:32:15.759 --> 00:32:20.319
bathroom pretty soon. And with me, it goes from that to red alert,

517
00:32:20.319 --> 00:32:23.519
red alert pretty quickly. And my
first thought was, Paul, just

518
00:32:23.640 --> 00:32:29.240
going to Walmart, P get oar
with and you can relax. But then

519
00:32:29.240 --> 00:32:30.799
I thought, no, if I
do that, the guy's gonna come out

520
00:32:30.839 --> 00:32:34.559
with the stuff and it's gonna cause
a huge problem. I'm gonna have to

521
00:32:34.599 --> 00:32:37.480
make phone calls and text messages and
everything's gonna be delayed. And I said,

522
00:32:37.480 --> 00:32:39.640
I'll just write it out. I'll
get these orders. I'll find a

523
00:32:39.680 --> 00:32:44.200
bathroom. Right. Unfortunately, it
wasn't food, like there's a time crunch,

524
00:32:44.279 --> 00:32:47.240
like something doesn't get cold. It's
just groceries. Sure, so the

525
00:32:47.240 --> 00:32:51.960
guy finally comes out, I get
taken care of. P P is up

526
00:32:52.000 --> 00:32:54.720
to code level three. Okay,
so the old terror alert system right,

527
00:32:55.319 --> 00:32:58.680
yeah, yeah, okay, yeah, my bladder was at orange. Yeah,

528
00:32:58.680 --> 00:33:02.720
this is what Ashcroft's been doing.
Probably dead, winning an ashcraft Ashcraft

529
00:33:02.720 --> 00:33:06.319
that did the terror alerts, as
say, that's what he's done since his

530
00:33:06.359 --> 00:33:09.240
retires, working under bladder alert.
It's probably dead though he's in a bunker

531
00:33:09.319 --> 00:33:15.160
somewhere. So anyway, and ironically, not ironically it's ron choice of words,

532
00:33:15.160 --> 00:33:20.759
but amusingly, one of the orders
was for an ex girlfriend, which

533
00:33:20.759 --> 00:33:27.559
I thought was really funny anyway.
So so my initial plan was foiled because

534
00:33:28.160 --> 00:33:31.559
when I got the directions for the
first one, there was no gas station,

535
00:33:31.599 --> 00:33:35.839
convenience store, nothing in sight nowhere
where I could use a restaurant.

536
00:33:36.319 --> 00:33:38.279
So then I thought, Plan B
is, Okay, dropped this on their

537
00:33:38.279 --> 00:33:42.240
porch. Then I'll find a bathroom. Then I'll go to the second one.

538
00:33:42.319 --> 00:33:44.640
Sure, so I dropped the first
one off on the porch, I

539
00:33:44.680 --> 00:33:49.440
started hitting towards the second one,
bladders up to code red. I realize

540
00:33:49.599 --> 00:33:52.279
I'm not gonna make it all right. And this is a frequent occurrence in

541
00:33:52.319 --> 00:33:54.559
the mornings. It is because I
drink at a liquids in the morning.

542
00:33:54.599 --> 00:34:04.079
Sure, sure water and mountain dew. So um. I happen to be

543
00:34:04.160 --> 00:34:07.559
in a pretty upscale neighborhood kind of
place where you don't just whip out the

544
00:34:07.559 --> 00:34:14.679
way. What what neighborhood is?
Okay for whipping out the way? Yeah,

545
00:34:14.679 --> 00:34:17.960
it's a good, good point.
It's frowned upon in most neighborhood.

546
00:34:19.000 --> 00:34:21.480
Let's just say it would be frowned
upon more. Okay, got it.

547
00:34:21.760 --> 00:34:24.920
The frown would be harder, more
downturned, and the frown would be accompanied

548
00:34:24.920 --> 00:34:30.239
by a call to nine one one. So I have to stop. I

549
00:34:30.280 --> 00:34:34.280
have to go. I have to
go, And so I positioned my car

550
00:34:34.480 --> 00:34:37.119
in a way so that wouldn't be
facing like the front of a house or

551
00:34:37.159 --> 00:34:38.920
a playground full of kids. Sure. The last thing I'm gonna do is

552
00:34:38.920 --> 00:34:42.840
be on a sexual offender. Last
guest, Now this goes. This is

553
00:34:42.840 --> 00:34:45.079
where part two of the story comes
in. From my thrilling middle act,

554
00:34:47.079 --> 00:34:55.119
the saga The Empire Strikes Back of
Your Soca, a fallic adventure from my

555
00:34:55.199 --> 00:35:00.880
days as a mailman, I learned
that it's always good to have something to

556
00:35:00.079 --> 00:35:06.719
pee into. Sure, yeah,
sure. And as a driver, yeah,

557
00:35:06.800 --> 00:35:09.079
I mean emergencies, right, So
I always have like a pringle scan

558
00:35:09.320 --> 00:35:14.800
or any kind of cylindrical container that
you can do your stuff in. Sure

559
00:35:15.480 --> 00:35:21.039
number number one of course? Yeah, something right? No? Right?

560
00:35:22.519 --> 00:35:25.320
Uh? I hate a joke there, I'm gonna let that one go.

561
00:35:25.559 --> 00:35:30.639
Oh um, I'd whispered too,
but they'd hear that too. Okay,

562
00:35:31.159 --> 00:35:36.199
I can mute it. You have
you ever shitted into something? Go ahead?

563
00:35:37.199 --> 00:35:43.840
Oh my god, that's why I
didn't say it. Don't camera,

564
00:35:45.440 --> 00:35:50.320
go on, Church, No,
no, you could. We gotta get

565
00:35:50.360 --> 00:35:52.360
back to that. But go on. I'm not gonna interrupt you. Good

566
00:35:52.159 --> 00:35:54.840
God, I hate that. I
know, That's why I do it.

567
00:35:55.360 --> 00:36:01.639
Um, So I had at some
point, um it was a cylindrical container,

568
00:36:01.719 --> 00:36:07.079
and I think it was one of
those things that contained like disinfectant wipes.

569
00:36:07.280 --> 00:36:10.039
Oh yeah, yeah, like I
like a chlorox and pull it out

570
00:36:10.119 --> 00:36:14.159
those pull it out of the top. Yeah they're great. But I had,

571
00:36:14.480 --> 00:36:17.800
you know, taken the top off
it. The dispensy thing foil thing

572
00:36:17.960 --> 00:36:21.760
wasn't on it, sure right,
So I just had the empty canister for

573
00:36:21.880 --> 00:36:25.760
this reason. So I suddenly get
back in my driver's seat and I started

574
00:36:25.800 --> 00:36:30.360
to do my business in this thing. You're an eight, And the second

575
00:36:30.440 --> 00:36:37.639
I started just horrible burning sensation.
You know, where was there any kind

576
00:36:37.639 --> 00:36:43.119
of nick or Gray's happening with the
whole as you went in? We had

577
00:36:43.159 --> 00:36:45.760
to have been and he just but
you didn't notice that at the time.

578
00:36:45.840 --> 00:36:47.840
Well, I know is pain immediately, so oh but you still went through

579
00:36:47.920 --> 00:36:51.320
because I had to go so bad
that the second I knew it was safe

580
00:36:51.400 --> 00:36:53.639
to go, okay, I started
going. So it would have been simultaneous.

581
00:36:53.760 --> 00:36:59.519
Okay, I see, so just
this horrendous pain, like on fire

582
00:36:59.599 --> 00:37:05.079
pain. So I just got out
enough to where I knew I could just

583
00:37:05.320 --> 00:37:07.800
I didn't obviously go the whole thing. I just did enough so I could

584
00:37:07.840 --> 00:37:12.679
complete the next delivery, which if
they knew what was going on, Oh

585
00:37:12.840 --> 00:37:15.719
my god, health thrilled? Would
you be thrilled? YEA, of course.

586
00:37:15.800 --> 00:37:17.360
Yeah. So I get just a
little bit pee in the thing,

587
00:37:19.760 --> 00:37:22.039
and then I put the stupid thing. Tried to put it in my cupholder

588
00:37:22.079 --> 00:37:24.239
and it was too wide. It
wouldn't fit in the cupholder, so I

589
00:37:24.280 --> 00:37:28.320
had to hold it up against the
other seat with one hand to make sure

590
00:37:28.320 --> 00:37:30.800
it didn't spill, because that would
be nightmare part two, of course.

591
00:37:30.000 --> 00:37:34.159
So I'm driving one hand. I
god delivery. I rushed to the gas

592
00:37:34.199 --> 00:37:37.920
station to finish the rest of the
pee. I go into the thing and

593
00:37:37.960 --> 00:37:43.719
I'm peeing and I see blood and
it hurt like I'm a lot or it

594
00:37:43.880 --> 00:37:47.360
was yet the weird thing about it, it was just the initial burst it

595
00:37:47.480 --> 00:37:52.840
was blood and the rest was yurine. But it was horribly painful that area,

596
00:37:52.400 --> 00:37:57.639
and it was the whole process was
painful. It was bad. So

597
00:37:57.719 --> 00:38:00.679
of course I turned off the driver
app I'm not clear they're not gonna be

598
00:38:00.760 --> 00:38:02.480
driving the rest of the day.
So, by the way, I love

599
00:38:02.559 --> 00:38:07.960
the irony that you at first would
not even order Fuber Eats or door Dash

600
00:38:08.000 --> 00:38:10.639
when it came around. Yeah,
because you thought, oh, you're gonna

601
00:38:10.639 --> 00:38:14.079
just hire anyone, and guy's gonna
be putting his panis on my pizza.

602
00:38:14.159 --> 00:38:16.519
And I'm like, meanwhile, here
you are having a whole penis saga all

603
00:38:16.599 --> 00:38:21.559
delivering food. Yeah, yeah,
that's interesting. Yeah. Anyway, so

604
00:38:21.679 --> 00:38:24.599
I go home and for the rest
of the day it was the same thing.

605
00:38:24.679 --> 00:38:30.920
The rest of that day, blood
and pain. And then starting the

606
00:38:30.000 --> 00:38:35.679
next day, Here's the funny part
is when I well I didn't say this,

607
00:38:35.719 --> 00:38:37.239
but when I went to the gas
station, they were doing some construction

608
00:38:37.280 --> 00:38:42.639
work or something, so they had
one of those temporary dumpsters outside. Yeah,

609
00:38:43.320 --> 00:38:45.679
I took obviously, I wanted to
get the year and thing either so

610
00:38:45.800 --> 00:38:49.519
bad, so I threw the whole
thing in this dumpster. And I realized

611
00:38:49.599 --> 00:38:52.119
later, I said, because I
really wanted to know what the hell was

612
00:38:52.199 --> 00:38:54.840
on that thing that cut me.
Yeah, and I wanted to go rooting

613
00:38:54.840 --> 00:38:58.920
through the dumpster. And I remember
calling you and telling you everything, and

614
00:38:59.679 --> 00:39:04.719
we imagine this, I'll eat you
done. Just go ahead, imagine this

615
00:39:04.760 --> 00:39:07.239
scenario where I'm rooting through the dumpster
and the construction guys come up, and

616
00:39:07.360 --> 00:39:10.719
I say, oh, don't mind
me. I'm just looking for my special

617
00:39:10.880 --> 00:39:15.920
peak up. That's all love.
The idea of you showing up later to

618
00:39:15.159 --> 00:39:20.079
rifle through the evidence like you're looking
for like a killer. You're just trying

619
00:39:20.119 --> 00:39:25.400
to find the cup that wronged your
penis. Jesus Price. So you called

620
00:39:25.440 --> 00:39:29.119
me with a great concern. This
is probably gonna be funny at some point.

621
00:39:29.119 --> 00:39:30.039
We'll probably talk about it at some
point. Done a thing. But

622
00:39:30.199 --> 00:39:34.400
right now, remember I remember the
way I set it up for you.

623
00:39:34.559 --> 00:39:37.639
I said, I hurt my dick, while I shouldn't have said that.

624
00:39:37.719 --> 00:39:42.320
The company name. If you want
to beep it, yeah, okay,

625
00:39:42.400 --> 00:39:45.679
yeah, please do sure. Yeah, so the way this story ends,

626
00:39:45.880 --> 00:39:54.440
Siri reminded me beep okay. So
for like two or three days, same

627
00:39:54.519 --> 00:39:59.880
thing, blood at first, and
then pain, and then it was really

628
00:40:00.000 --> 00:40:02.159
weird the blood went away. I
was I've never been scared to pee in

629
00:40:02.239 --> 00:40:07.199
my life. Well, well,
on the other thing, wait what now

630
00:40:07.800 --> 00:40:12.719
I'm trying to understand what wait,
let alone the other thing? Everyone scared

631
00:40:12.719 --> 00:40:15.320
to be Oh masturbad is that what
we're oh? Oh, Okay, okay,

632
00:40:15.480 --> 00:40:17.519
sorry, go going, I'm sorry. Yes, wanking the weasel.

633
00:40:17.760 --> 00:40:22.920
Wanking the weasel. What you say
that was off the books for a while.

634
00:40:22.800 --> 00:40:29.960
Oh yeah, it's tragic. So
after a day or two, Um,

635
00:40:30.440 --> 00:40:35.239
it would be painful. And it
was painful during the pea part and

636
00:40:36.239 --> 00:40:43.639
shortly after, and then it became
it only hurt after And and I looked

637
00:40:43.880 --> 00:40:50.679
down there the penis and it was
raw. It was it was the redness.

638
00:40:50.840 --> 00:40:52.679
Yeah, yeah, it was.
It was not a happy penis.

639
00:40:52.760 --> 00:40:57.800
So what is the what is your
assumption about exactly what happened? I think

640
00:40:57.840 --> 00:41:00.519
I cut it the underside of it
on a little. I think, you

641
00:41:00.559 --> 00:41:04.880
know how sometimes I could give it
wasn't peanut butter, but say like a

642
00:41:04.960 --> 00:41:07.000
jarra pean bear. Yeah, there's
just the thing. You got to feel

643
00:41:07.199 --> 00:41:09.559
the foil thing, and sometimes when
you peel it off, it doesn't come

644
00:41:09.559 --> 00:41:14.360
off clean and there's like little shards
of the plastic or whatever. The Yeah,

645
00:41:14.679 --> 00:41:16.559
I'm pretty sure that's what happened.
That there was a it was just

646
00:41:16.719 --> 00:41:20.599
in the haste of needing to pee. No, I didn't tear it off

647
00:41:20.679 --> 00:41:22.199
in it was all ready to pee
into. No, but in the haste

648
00:41:22.239 --> 00:41:25.639
of needing to pee. You just
did not feel the nick and that's what

649
00:41:25.760 --> 00:41:28.840
happened. Well, I think I
felt it to me leacause I put it

650
00:41:28.920 --> 00:41:31.480
in and peed instantly. All right, right, um, but I think

651
00:41:31.519 --> 00:41:35.519
there was a little terror strip left
on that thing from when I taken off

652
00:41:35.559 --> 00:41:40.519
whenever. And I mean it was
pretty clear that something like that had happened.

653
00:41:42.239 --> 00:41:45.760
And eventually I did go to doctor, and I have a female doctor,

654
00:41:45.840 --> 00:41:51.039
so that's fun. And uh,
you know, she just kind of

655
00:41:51.079 --> 00:41:54.559
agreed that what happened happened. You
gave her the real story. Oh yeah,

656
00:41:54.599 --> 00:41:58.920
we have a good relationship. You
can talk about your peak up with

657
00:41:59.000 --> 00:42:00.440
your doctor. That's good. It's
important with that. Of course, she's

658
00:42:00.480 --> 00:42:04.639
great. Yeah, it's almost like
visiting your friend. It's Larry, really

659
00:42:04.760 --> 00:42:07.000
Yeah, a friend that you checks
out your penis and make sure it's okay.

660
00:42:07.039 --> 00:42:14.599
That's all my friends. Oh and
what I thought would happen happen.

661
00:42:14.679 --> 00:42:19.360
It didn't heal for a while.
I tip full three weeks. Yeah.

662
00:42:19.559 --> 00:42:25.719
Yeah, I love how when I
told you the scenario about I hurt my

663
00:42:27.079 --> 00:42:31.480
penis while ride sharing. Yes,
that you assumed I'd gotten in some sexual

664
00:42:31.519 --> 00:42:39.440
thing with somebody like I'm that stupid. I've had some frantic cults of that.

665
00:42:40.360 --> 00:42:45.199
But anyway, Yes, I actually
told my sisters said on Easter Sunday.

666
00:42:45.559 --> 00:42:49.719
Really yeah, really, that's It's
wonderful. It's like the famous skid

667
00:42:49.760 --> 00:42:54.639
Mark conversation on Thanksgiving dinner. We
don't have to Retreadswami. That's the penis

668
00:42:54.679 --> 00:42:59.119
story. It's a good penis story. Penis is okay now though, Oh

669
00:42:59.239 --> 00:43:05.119
yeah, better than never. Oh
yeah, he's back in the game.

670
00:43:05.159 --> 00:43:10.280
Baby. He what's his name,
A tiny Elvis? His name is tiny

671
00:43:10.320 --> 00:43:15.440
Elvis. No, I don't know
if you want to. He's a sad,

672
00:43:15.519 --> 00:43:21.199
lonely old thing. He didn't get
reason. He didn't have a reason

673
00:43:21.239 --> 00:43:25.000
to get angry much anymore. Angry
penis gets angry. We'll talk about my

674
00:43:25.599 --> 00:43:32.440
theory on when sex becomes gross and
weird and stupid. Sure, yeah,

675
00:43:32.920 --> 00:43:39.400
you scientific theory. I've assigned a
year to win an age when sex is

676
00:43:39.480 --> 00:43:45.280
just just stop stop having sex?
Yeah, why because it's weird and gross

677
00:43:45.400 --> 00:43:49.159
and sloppy and stupid. What's the
age fifty two? How many times you

678
00:43:49.280 --> 00:43:52.599
had sex since the age of fifty
two? My share? Your share was

679
00:43:52.599 --> 00:43:55.039
a gross and weird and you should
stop for them. Probably for you.

680
00:43:58.199 --> 00:44:00.920
Oh, this is not the same. You don't have the air. Yeah,

681
00:44:00.159 --> 00:44:02.519
yeah, it's so nice. Little. Here's the thing, it's it's

682
00:44:02.559 --> 00:44:07.159
a it's a you're you're not a
married man, you're not in a relationship.

683
00:44:07.480 --> 00:44:09.639
I believe it's it's not just a
ah the kernel, you know,

684
00:44:09.920 --> 00:44:13.719
it's like it's a love thing.
You just reach a point where you want

685
00:44:13.760 --> 00:44:17.320
to eat a cookie and sent in
a chair. That's it's fifty two.

686
00:44:17.960 --> 00:44:21.400
Sorry, honey, it's been a
good run. That's where it starts.

687
00:44:22.440 --> 00:44:24.519
I'm gonna eat this cookie and sent
in a chair. And let's be honest.

688
00:44:24.559 --> 00:44:30.440
I mean, I mean attractiveness on
both sides fades. Your body's subjective,

689
00:44:30.599 --> 00:44:36.360
your body's change. Yeah, of
course, the thought of two old

690
00:44:36.480 --> 00:44:39.320
people with stretch marks and bellies,
and it's the human condition. We're all

691
00:44:39.519 --> 00:44:43.800
destined for it. And it's flappy
stuff and this stuff, it's not a

692
00:44:43.840 --> 00:44:45.880
disqualification. You don't beauty. You
don't need to be flapping that shit around.

693
00:44:47.599 --> 00:44:52.199
Just stop. It should have sent
a poet, you had, you

694
00:44:52.400 --> 00:44:55.559
had a good thirty year run.
Just live off that. Stop having Would

695
00:44:55.559 --> 00:44:59.960
you make it illegal to have sex
over fifty two? I'd love to see

696
00:45:00.119 --> 00:45:05.599
President Paul, what would have if
you ran so twenty twenty four? What

697
00:45:05.719 --> 00:45:08.320
are the key things you're running on? Well, I mean not serious shit

698
00:45:09.039 --> 00:45:13.760
like Paul stuff. No more helmets
and dugouts after you hit a home run.

699
00:45:14.760 --> 00:45:16.039
That's a big one for me.
Okay, that's an important one.

700
00:45:16.199 --> 00:45:20.400
Is that. That's number one.
It's not even helmets, it's stupid comic

701
00:45:20.480 --> 00:45:23.480
book bullshit. That's number one.
No, okay, I mean you give

702
00:45:23.519 --> 00:45:27.119
me time and I'll come up the
list of hundred things. Sure. Sure.

703
00:45:27.519 --> 00:45:31.039
What's what's illegal in your your first
year illegal? What's what is newly

704
00:45:31.159 --> 00:45:37.079
illegal in your first year in office? Uh? Ear gauges? Why,

705
00:45:37.639 --> 00:45:45.280
there's just no reason for it illegal? What's what's the descentans? Uh?

706
00:45:45.480 --> 00:45:47.320
You have your ears chopped off?
Have your ears chopped off? If you

707
00:45:47.360 --> 00:45:54.159
have a gauge? Yeah, well
I had a line there my next Oh

708
00:45:54.360 --> 00:45:58.760
god, huh, all right,
so that's illegal. Whatever I've learned from

709
00:45:58.800 --> 00:46:06.920
Mark Marin about being a boomer,
a woke boomer, he nailed. He

710
00:46:07.119 --> 00:46:12.480
nailed being a woke Nothing sounds older
than saying I'm a woke boomer. He

711
00:46:12.760 --> 00:46:16.119
nailed what it's like to be our
age and to be a fairly liberal person.

712
00:46:16.360 --> 00:46:21.920
Sure, you know you're eighty He
just what he did was he described

713
00:46:22.000 --> 00:46:24.440
himself as being eighty five percent woke. Sure, and the other fifteen percent

714
00:46:24.559 --> 00:46:29.480
maybe just don't say that stuff.
Sure, It never really hit me because

715
00:46:29.480 --> 00:46:31.320
that's kind of how I feel about
myself. Yeah, yeah, yeah,

716
00:46:31.639 --> 00:46:37.519
But ear gages fair game. What's
the point of that. It looks what's

717
00:46:37.559 --> 00:46:39.719
the point of anything. It looks
insane. It fucks your ear up.

718
00:46:40.400 --> 00:46:44.280
People are gonna make judgments on you
about it. You're not gonna get a

719
00:46:44.280 --> 00:46:49.800
goddamn job. You were talking like
you were running a grocery store. You're

720
00:46:49.840 --> 00:46:52.000
not going to get a job if
you have an ear gage. Maybe a

721
00:46:52.119 --> 00:46:57.920
hot topic or something, Oh my
god, go that way about tattoos.

722
00:46:58.880 --> 00:47:01.280
No, okay, two is a
fair game ear gages, in fact,

723
00:47:01.400 --> 00:47:07.239
they're gonna get a job in fact, on on never mind that was fifteen

724
00:47:07.320 --> 00:47:09.400
percent. I keep to myself,
I know a lot of people with ear

725
00:47:09.480 --> 00:47:15.360
gages that have very good jobs.
Oh, there's you know many people the

726
00:47:15.440 --> 00:47:16.920
video game it this rev ear gages
to say, not in the real world.

727
00:47:17.039 --> 00:47:21.400
You don't. You don't think there
are people in the real world that

728
00:47:21.480 --> 00:47:25.000
have ear gages and good jobs.
More than no one makes more than twenty

729
00:47:25.039 --> 00:47:28.239
bucks an hour if they have an
ear gage. Maybe in like a high

730
00:47:28.360 --> 00:47:35.119
end Boston or New York coffee shop. All right, So if you're in

731
00:47:35.119 --> 00:47:38.440
a Boston or New York coffee shop, because I see and I think,

732
00:47:38.559 --> 00:47:42.239
yeah, I think they get a
cut of that. Yeah, it comes

733
00:47:42.400 --> 00:47:45.159
down, Sit down. Tips would
be high. Oh the tips. Okay,

734
00:47:45.360 --> 00:47:46.599
it comes down. And tell the
folks about your cool new thing.

735
00:47:46.679 --> 00:47:52.079
You say, wow, looks the
guy, it's a good moon. What

736
00:47:52.199 --> 00:47:53.840
are the odds to be not drunkenly
tripping over these wires? That's what I

737
00:47:53.880 --> 00:47:57.800
tell you to go around this,
wires and steps. This is a drunk

738
00:47:57.840 --> 00:48:05.119
middle age guys, fire and fire, steps, wires and fire. That's

739
00:48:05.199 --> 00:48:07.920
right. Tell the folks about your
cooler thing. You say, well,

740
00:48:07.000 --> 00:48:12.599
it's all tongue in cheek. It's
still he keeps it's maybe tongue in cheek

741
00:48:12.679 --> 00:48:15.239
origins. But you do keep doing
it all year around you and I do

742
00:48:15.360 --> 00:48:19.159
it just because I know i'd get
the reactions I did the same reason you

743
00:48:19.239 --> 00:48:24.159
do. All the ship to me, all right, tell them um.

744
00:48:24.360 --> 00:48:29.639
Spoiler alert can assume most people have
seen breaking bad. Well, yes,

745
00:48:29.800 --> 00:48:31.880
but also this is not a spoiler. It's not a plot thing. No.

746
00:48:32.639 --> 00:48:37.599
There's a character named Skinny Pete in
Breaking Bad and they're the young,

747
00:48:38.880 --> 00:48:43.280
you know, street drug pedaling guys. So they're hipped to the street,

748
00:48:44.440 --> 00:48:50.079
just like Hug You Bear. Jesus, you keep aging with everything you say

749
00:48:50.519 --> 00:48:53.000
you do. Hug You Bear was
starting yes, yeah, okay, yeah,

750
00:48:53.280 --> 00:48:57.199
he was the coolest guy around him. Sure, yeah, that man

751
00:48:57.360 --> 00:49:02.159
new the street. Okay, go
on. So Skinny Pete was the Huggy

752
00:49:02.239 --> 00:49:08.320
Bear of twenty thirteen, right,
sure. So when I was rewatching Breaking

753
00:49:08.360 --> 00:49:12.039
Back for the fifth time, which
is amazing that I've done that, because

754
00:49:12.119 --> 00:49:16.079
if you know me, which you
clearly don't, they knew all the hip

755
00:49:16.199 --> 00:49:22.320
new phrases. So written by Vince
Gilligan, it's like a fifty something wild

756
00:49:22.360 --> 00:49:27.760
dude. So whenever anyone would say
something that Skinny Pete agreed with, and

757
00:49:28.159 --> 00:49:31.000
part of it was the body language
too. The folks can see you where

758
00:49:31.039 --> 00:49:36.199
which camera hit him over here,
like tell us it's just say it's a

759
00:49:36.360 --> 00:49:42.760
really nice night. It's really nice
night to night church. That's my thing.

760
00:49:43.000 --> 00:49:45.280
And so the last time I was
watching that, I thought Dan will

761
00:49:45.360 --> 00:49:51.639
hate this. I put it in
my boomer pocket, and I've been saying

762
00:49:51.679 --> 00:49:54.960
it a lot on this trip,
and he's hated it a lot every time.

763
00:49:55.320 --> 00:50:00.599
So mission accomplished. Everybody nice.
Yes, I want to go back

764
00:50:00.639 --> 00:50:02.440
to this ear gage thing because I
think it's hilarious that you think nobody can

765
00:50:02.480 --> 00:50:05.280
get a job if they have that. What else? What else is in

766
00:50:05.360 --> 00:50:07.760
that category? Not in the real
world? What is the real world?

767
00:50:07.679 --> 00:50:12.599
Video game industry is not a real
world. It's a very weird I get

768
00:50:12.599 --> 00:50:15.039
it, okay, But you don't
think somebody could get a grocery store a

769
00:50:15.119 --> 00:50:16.760
post office. You don't think anyone
can get a job at a grocery store

770
00:50:16.800 --> 00:50:20.920
with ear gauges. They'd give menium
wage job. You don't think they can

771
00:50:20.960 --> 00:50:22.719
move up and becoming. You don't
use any managers. I've had managers at

772
00:50:22.800 --> 00:50:30.559
movie theaters that have ear gauges in
Kansas, the any any job that the

773
00:50:31.119 --> 00:50:42.239
God, I'm gonna get so much
hate mail for this hate mail. I

774
00:50:42.360 --> 00:50:46.320
know I'm old job. You're really
good at grabbing a shovel when you're already

775
00:50:46.320 --> 00:50:53.719
in a hole. Any industry that's
geared towards a younger employee base, that's

776
00:50:53.719 --> 00:50:57.400
gonna happen, like movie theaters,
generally or younger. Okay, you don't

777
00:50:57.400 --> 00:51:00.239
think there's insurance agents that have ear
gage? Oh you don't think there are

778
00:51:00.239 --> 00:51:05.159
any insurance challenge find me one.
You don't think there are any insurance agentes

779
00:51:05.199 --> 00:51:10.800
that have ear gages? I doubt
it. Oh boy, Okay about car

780
00:51:10.880 --> 00:51:15.760
salesman? Do they count? No? Because those guys are kind of renegades?

781
00:51:15.400 --> 00:51:20.440
Rid Okay, Um, what are
what are real job? What count

782
00:51:20.519 --> 00:51:23.760
is real jobs? And post office
grocery stores? You never saw anyone of

783
00:51:23.760 --> 00:51:30.199
the post office at the ear gages? Minimum wage? Okay, nobody in

784
00:51:30.360 --> 00:51:35.880
positions management or anything. Okay,
extremely exists because that was the thing that

785
00:51:36.000 --> 00:51:37.719
started like becoming a thing like find
me one, just find me want to

786
00:51:37.760 --> 00:51:40.280
get back with me? Folks,
If anyone wants to link in the contents,

787
00:51:40.639 --> 00:51:45.159
I'll hit you with my digits and
you can. You can let me

788
00:51:45.239 --> 00:51:47.719
know about this. What else is
in the category of like ear gages?

789
00:51:47.760 --> 00:51:53.639
That's like an instant DQ illegal never
gonna get a job? Oh well this

790
00:51:53.800 --> 00:51:58.920
might this one might get me kills. Oh good, I'll whisper it and

791
00:51:58.960 --> 00:52:07.880
you tell me thanks, say it. Go for it, go for it,

792
00:52:07.360 --> 00:52:12.360
any go for it. You keep
broadcasting where I live. This is

793
00:52:12.440 --> 00:52:15.639
not good the place you've said a
million times. Anyway, he did say

794
00:52:15.639 --> 00:52:20.320
it. It's not that bad any
tattoo above the collar bone. I got

795
00:52:20.400 --> 00:52:24.519
a friend with a tattoo, big
fucking tattoo on his neck, and uh,

796
00:52:24.639 --> 00:52:29.360
he makes millions of dollars a year
legally, legally. Yo, Yeah,

797
00:52:29.960 --> 00:52:31.280
I have no problem tattoos. I
think tattoos are great. I think

798
00:52:31.320 --> 00:52:37.199
they're gonna regret it in like forty
years. But why because they'd look weird

799
00:52:37.280 --> 00:52:38.599
after. Have you ever see the
old like World War two guys they had

800
00:52:38.639 --> 00:52:42.559
they My father in law has one, and it's looking awesome. It's like

801
00:52:42.599 --> 00:52:45.920
a little like but as your skin
gets hold and it gets all crankly and

802
00:52:46.039 --> 00:52:51.079
all these sexy little you know,
corns and rainbows and dolphins and stuff are

803
00:52:51.199 --> 00:52:53.599
gonna look really stupid old like sailor
like mom, tattoos are cool or like

804
00:52:53.880 --> 00:52:58.760
not when you're seventy. My father
in law of seventy something and his tattoos

805
00:52:58.800 --> 00:53:01.119
cool. Well, he had a
good artist. Then, Okay, so

806
00:53:01.199 --> 00:53:05.559
tattoos about the collarbone. You're not
gonna be cornering me into a corner with

807
00:53:05.679 --> 00:53:12.119
your own opinions, with all these
things that everybody's gonna hate me for they're

808
00:53:12.199 --> 00:53:17.400
your actual opinions, not this gotcha
journalism here on the deck. I'm just

809
00:53:17.480 --> 00:53:22.239
a crabby old man. I know. I just I've always I don't know

810
00:53:22.239 --> 00:53:25.679
I admired the word, but I've
always been fascinated by your confidence with some

811
00:53:25.760 --> 00:53:30.639
of these opinions. Namely, we
talked about it on the new one that

812
00:53:30.679 --> 00:53:32.280
I'm fascinated with, and we talked
about a bit on a stream we just

813
00:53:32.320 --> 00:53:36.679
did. Is your opinion? Sighing
at your own opinions, you said,

814
00:53:36.760 --> 00:53:42.039
with the utmost, it just a
conviction. Soccer is not a sport.

815
00:53:42.679 --> 00:53:45.320
It's an activity. And there was
a follow up tonight on the stream that

816
00:53:45.400 --> 00:53:49.880
I loved. I asked you what
boxing was and if boxing was a sport,

817
00:53:50.280 --> 00:53:52.239
and you thought about it and you
said, no, boxing isn't a

818
00:53:52.360 --> 00:53:57.639
sport. Boxing is a challenge,
which is such a weird way to put

819
00:53:57.719 --> 00:54:00.400
that well, And I threw something
in after that is anything is one on

820
00:54:00.480 --> 00:54:05.719
one thing cannot be a sport because
there's no one on one sports. Fencing

821
00:54:05.840 --> 00:54:09.800
is not a sport. No,
it's a skill. Ping pong, that's

822
00:54:09.840 --> 00:54:15.960
a skill. Okay, okay,
So name the sports. There's three that

823
00:54:16.039 --> 00:54:22.599
I officially in my brain gets the
stamp baseball, basketball football, baseball basketball

824
00:54:22.599 --> 00:54:25.480
football. Okay, hockey is hockey
a sport? Hockey's borderline? Hockey is

825
00:54:25.480 --> 00:54:30.679
a borderline sport. Okay, Tennis, no, one on one. There's

826
00:54:30.719 --> 00:54:35.719
also doubles tennis. But is double's
tennis a sport? No, it's the

827
00:54:35.800 --> 00:54:39.719
same, It's a variation of the
same activity. So tennis is an activity.

828
00:54:39.960 --> 00:54:44.800
Yeah what and it takes tremendous talent
to do it? Sure? Sure,

829
00:54:44.880 --> 00:54:47.320
I'm not discounting that. Sure,
Okay, Um, what are the

830
00:54:47.400 --> 00:54:52.360
parameters for sport? We've been through
this, but not on this. Oh

831
00:54:52.400 --> 00:54:59.280
that's a different stupid thing. See
how can I bury myself? No on

832
00:54:59.360 --> 00:55:02.719
this one, your actual opinions,
I would know. I just want to

833
00:55:02.760 --> 00:55:07.800
talk it through. What is what
makes a sport? Plenty of offense?

834
00:55:08.679 --> 00:55:13.639
Define offense, points points on the
board? Okay, right, okay?

835
00:55:13.639 --> 00:55:17.159
Where soccer is like the ultimate example
of and and and related to that,

836
00:55:17.360 --> 00:55:22.920
you cannot have something in in a
tie. And although I accept football as

837
00:55:22.960 --> 00:55:25.000
being a sport in the regular season, they do have ties, which I've

838
00:55:25.039 --> 00:55:30.280
always thought was stupid. But football
is a sport absolutely Okay, But they

839
00:55:30.280 --> 00:55:31.840
should change that there should never be
a tie in front. Okay, but

840
00:55:31.960 --> 00:55:36.679
so all right, so we gotta
okay, there's enough offense. There's enough

841
00:55:36.719 --> 00:55:38.199
offense in baseball for it to be
a sport. Yeah, yeah, okay,

842
00:55:38.280 --> 00:55:43.159
but not soccer and not hockey hockeys
borderline, What about tennis? There's

843
00:55:43.199 --> 00:55:46.400
lots of Does tennis not have offense? Yeah, but they call it love

844
00:55:46.480 --> 00:55:50.679
instead of zero. It's not offense
because they call it a different thing.

845
00:55:51.039 --> 00:55:53.800
That's just stupid. Well, sober
I don't see tennis being disqualified here.

846
00:55:54.119 --> 00:55:59.119
Let's get back to the other thing. What else does sports? What else

847
00:55:59.239 --> 00:56:02.400
is a sport clock? The clock
has to move forward if there's a clock.

848
00:56:04.239 --> 00:56:07.159
Wait, so does there have to
be a clock? Uh? There

849
00:56:07.239 --> 00:56:08.480
didn't use to have to be in
baseball, and now there kind of is.

850
00:56:09.239 --> 00:56:13.079
And there is clocks in football.
There is clocks in basketball with the

851
00:56:13.159 --> 00:56:19.360
caveat. Baseball has a clock now, but it's it's timing individual instances.

852
00:56:19.599 --> 00:56:22.639
The overall length of the game has
no time, got it, Okay,

853
00:56:22.679 --> 00:56:27.400
whereas football does and it's a wacky
clock. Yeah. Now soccer has double

854
00:56:27.440 --> 00:56:31.559
trouble in this in this regard because
the clock goes backwards. That's one factor

855
00:56:31.679 --> 00:56:36.880
loan soccer, you let yourself getting
the hit with the ball. It's really

856
00:56:37.000 --> 00:56:38.679
dumb. And you can't use your
hands. That's a big one too,

857
00:56:39.800 --> 00:56:43.559
because you can't use your hands in
baseball football. So the ones that are

858
00:56:43.559 --> 00:56:45.719
officially sports, it's got to be
small basketball, football you can use your

859
00:56:45.760 --> 00:56:49.840
hands, and there has to be
a ball and there well, okay,

860
00:56:50.000 --> 00:56:52.440
football is a ball. Okay,
Well, soccer has a ball. Tennis

861
00:56:52.480 --> 00:56:54.920
has a ball, right, So
I'm still not saying that is qualified for

862
00:56:55.039 --> 00:57:01.599
the other reasons. Tennis is disqualified
because it's one on one. It's one.

863
00:57:01.960 --> 00:57:05.800
What about double tennis? I'm still
not seeing way double tennis it doesn't

864
00:57:05.880 --> 00:57:07.880
count because the core route of the
game is the one on one. Is

865
00:57:07.920 --> 00:57:12.599
just an extension of that. It's
the same stupid thing. Just work with

866
00:57:12.679 --> 00:57:15.440
me here, I know. I
am trying to just piece of the logic

867
00:57:15.480 --> 00:57:21.119
together here, Okay, Um,
other parameters for sport, there's several of

868
00:57:21.159 --> 00:57:27.239
the time clock, the offense,
what was the other the ball? There

869
00:57:27.320 --> 00:57:30.239
was something else. Oh, it
has to be a team thing. You

870
00:57:30.320 --> 00:57:37.639
ask me more than one on one? Okay, why? Because that's one

871
00:57:37.679 --> 00:57:40.760
of the things that makes the sport
of support. Who decided that me.

872
00:57:42.480 --> 00:57:46.880
Okay, we've got there. Okay, okay, trying to think other you

873
00:57:46.960 --> 00:57:51.039
said, you know, darts aren't
a sport. Pool. Darts is definitely

874
00:57:51.079 --> 00:57:53.159
an activity. So pool is one
on one. So pool isn't a sport

875
00:57:53.199 --> 00:57:57.280
to you has lots of balls and
you love pool. I love pool,

876
00:57:57.559 --> 00:58:04.199
I used to. Okay, all
right, so there's three sports. And

877
00:58:05.000 --> 00:58:07.639
remember anything you're drinking at, anything
you can drink at and it's not a

878
00:58:07.679 --> 00:58:10.760
problem while you're doing it is not
a sport. Okay, So that disqualifies

879
00:58:10.800 --> 00:58:14.000
pool, Bowling, dark, anything
you could do in a bar is not

880
00:58:14.079 --> 00:58:19.920
a sport. Okay. I mean
there's Papa Shop, but that's not traditional

881
00:58:19.960 --> 00:58:22.000
basketball, right, got it?
Okay, that's maybe one on one,

882
00:58:22.079 --> 00:58:25.400
that's one on zero. That's true. Let's see you against yourself, Okay.

883
00:58:27.719 --> 00:58:30.480
I think tennis is the biggest one
where I think you're stretching. I

884
00:58:30.599 --> 00:58:34.960
have a ton of respect. Also, soccer, which is objectively the biggest

885
00:58:35.000 --> 00:58:39.119
sport on the planet. Do you
do you at least concede to reality that

886
00:58:39.719 --> 00:58:45.920
soccer is immensely more popular than baseball
everywhere, but here it's probably getting closer.

887
00:58:46.000 --> 00:58:49.639
Okay, do you think in ten
years soccer will be more popular than

888
00:58:49.679 --> 00:58:53.119
baseball. What are the what's the
criteria viewers? I don't know. I

889
00:58:53.159 --> 00:58:55.400
don't pay attention to that. To
a viewer, how many viewers? Something

890
00:58:55.480 --> 00:59:00.480
else? What do you consider to
be the barometer for popularity? I don't

891
00:59:00.519 --> 00:59:05.159
know how intrenched it is in the
American moral fiber. I'll tell you I

892
00:59:05.280 --> 00:59:07.639
got a lot more people I know
that look, and I'm not. I

893
00:59:07.679 --> 00:59:08.760
don't want to be soccer defender here. I don't give it. I've watched

894
00:59:08.760 --> 00:59:10.559
like two soccer games in my life. I've been bored out of my mind

895
00:59:10.599 --> 00:59:13.960
both times. I'm just trying to
figure out the logic here. Like,

896
00:59:14.280 --> 00:59:16.079
I know a ton of people that
are really into soccer. I know like

897
00:59:16.320 --> 00:59:20.960
three people that are really into baseball. Well that's a that's a generational thing.

898
00:59:21.039 --> 00:59:22.760
Well, don't you think that's baseball
is not popular with younger people.

899
00:59:22.840 --> 00:59:27.239
Don't you think that's troubling for its
its future? Oh? Absolutely? Okay,

900
00:59:27.280 --> 00:59:30.320
So you can you see a world
the future baseball is kind of not

901
00:59:30.400 --> 00:59:31.760
a big thing in America. I
can't see a time where it will not

902
00:59:31.840 --> 00:59:35.760
exist, but sure, it's popularity
has been waning for a long time.

903
00:59:36.280 --> 00:59:38.639
Do you see a time when baseball
is not as commonly on TV and stuff

904
00:59:38.679 --> 00:59:42.039
it is as it is now,
and soccer is a big thing on TV

905
00:59:42.119 --> 00:59:45.320
in America. Nobody's gonna watch TV
on watch soccer on TV. No one's

906
00:59:45.320 --> 00:59:49.159
gonna watch soccer, and people will
because it's an event. Have you seen

907
00:59:49.159 --> 00:59:52.239
the ratings for the World Cup and
stuff. Yeah, but that's that's like,

908
00:59:52.960 --> 00:59:55.480
that's like your mom and the Chiefs. She doesn't give a shit about

909
00:59:55.480 --> 00:59:59.440
the Chiefs. Do you know soccer
fans? Huh? Do you know soccer

910
00:59:59.519 --> 01:00:01.800
fans? I knew one. What
makes you think it's like a fake fandom?

911
01:00:02.599 --> 01:00:06.719
People I know that are into soccer
are extremely fucking into soccer. Don't

912
01:00:06.719 --> 01:00:07.920
do that. Yeah, well you
just did. You just said that you

913
01:00:08.000 --> 01:00:12.679
thought it was like a fake fandom. It's more of an event to go

914
01:00:12.840 --> 01:00:16.639
to. What does that mean?
It means they're not actively interested in the

915
01:00:16.679 --> 01:00:21.480
sport itself. It's an event to
be at. So people going to soccer

916
01:00:21.559 --> 01:00:24.920
games aren't into the sport. A
lot of them are, but not everybody

917
01:00:24.920 --> 01:00:29.079
in the stadium. Here's my biggest
question, what are you basing any of

918
01:00:29.119 --> 01:00:32.239
the song? My life's experienced?
The reason? What I base anything on?

919
01:00:32.840 --> 01:00:40.599
M I could be wrong. It's
possible, it is possible. It

920
01:00:40.679 --> 01:00:44.599
reminds me that line from the Eagles
song I could be wrong, but I'm

921
01:00:44.679 --> 01:00:47.800
not. I've got to go ahead
and say you're wrong on this one.

922
01:00:49.039 --> 01:00:51.440
But to each their own, it's
fine. Don't marter. I'll be dead

923
01:00:51.440 --> 01:00:55.599
in twenty years. The man,
what's eighty year old? Look like me?

924
01:00:55.880 --> 01:01:00.760
Yeah? Oh, squeeze something.
I'm gonna share this depressing thought I

925
01:01:00.840 --> 01:01:02.559
had a couple of weeks ago.
I don't know. I think I told

926
01:01:02.559 --> 01:01:08.280
you okay, oh yeah. This
one hit me because I've been turning sixties

927
01:01:08.400 --> 01:01:12.400
the first birthday. It's ever bothered
me anyway, but I thought of this

928
01:01:12.559 --> 01:01:15.400
recently. There's a young player in
the Royals named Bobby Witt Junior. Remember

929
01:01:15.480 --> 01:01:20.000
league site about he's phenomenal talent,
but he's like twenty one, twenty two

930
01:01:20.079 --> 01:01:22.039
years old, and I was like, man, this kid does well and

931
01:01:22.079 --> 01:01:24.800
stays healthy, he could make the
Hall of Fame. And it hit me,

932
01:01:25.320 --> 01:01:30.079
Oh shit, he makes the Hall
of Fame, I probably won't be

933
01:01:30.119 --> 01:01:32.920
here to see it. And that
really hit me hard. I thought,

934
01:01:32.960 --> 01:01:37.360
like that has never hit me before. Yeah, it's it's sobering, definitely.

935
01:01:38.880 --> 01:01:42.320
I mean that stuff only happens like
more and more as you get old.

936
01:01:42.360 --> 01:01:45.159
Like I know, I'm just try
at forty, but like I'm starting

937
01:01:45.159 --> 01:01:46.960
to have that stuff where it's just
like oh fuck, like that one slapped

938
01:01:46.960 --> 01:01:52.920
me across the face. Yeah it's
true. Yeah, I remember mine was

939
01:01:52.960 --> 01:01:54.719
that. I remember like being a
wrestling fan, like in the nineties.

940
01:01:54.760 --> 01:01:59.480
I remember watching like this guy Edge
come up and he was he was this

941
01:01:59.639 --> 01:02:00.639
young hot talent that like, you
know, I was like, oh man,

942
01:02:00.679 --> 01:02:05.800
this kid's gonna be major potential here. And I just remember being an

943
01:02:05.840 --> 01:02:07.079
old enough fan to like, oh
man, I'm very excited about this like

944
01:02:07.199 --> 01:02:10.400
new prospect, you know. And
I've seen his entire career. I've seen

945
01:02:10.480 --> 01:02:14.400
him get forced into retirement. I've
seen him kind of come back, and

946
01:02:14.480 --> 01:02:16.239
now he's you know, talking about
like, yeah, I've probably got maybe

947
01:02:16.280 --> 01:02:19.719
another year, another two that i
can compete at this level or whatever.

948
01:02:19.920 --> 01:02:21.840
And to think of, like,
oh, I'm old enough to have like

949
01:02:21.960 --> 01:02:25.480
remembered when he was this like twenty
something, you know, newcomer and seeing

950
01:02:25.559 --> 01:02:29.719
this whole thing and like then he's
gonna have to retire Like oh Man's like

951
01:02:30.199 --> 01:02:31.480
that makes me feel old, you
know. Yeah, Well there's there was

952
01:02:31.480 --> 01:02:38.360
an evolution for me in terms of
baseball. I first started noticing when baseball

953
01:02:38.400 --> 01:02:43.719
players were getting younger in me.
I was like whoa, And then managers

954
01:02:43.719 --> 01:02:45.719
started getting younger in me. Now
there are a few owners younger than me.

955
01:02:45.920 --> 01:02:50.000
Yeah, it's like, oh,
man, I remember you back when

956
01:02:50.119 --> 01:02:53.480
the first players were getting younger than
you telling me about it. And I

957
01:02:53.639 --> 01:02:57.920
never felt it until you know,
Xavier Woods when I started to hang out

958
01:02:57.920 --> 01:03:00.320
with him, and then I realized
that, like, oh shit, he's

959
01:03:00.320 --> 01:03:01.320
like two or three years younger than
me, and I was like, oh

960
01:03:01.519 --> 01:03:05.519
god, damn. I kind of
hate when things are just kind of taken

961
01:03:05.559 --> 01:03:08.199
off the table where it's like I
hate ever hearing that I can't do something,

962
01:03:08.239 --> 01:03:15.239
where it's like even if right now, if I dropped everything and dedicated

963
01:03:15.280 --> 01:03:19.039
my entire life like just got personal
trainers, did all this, like for

964
01:03:19.119 --> 01:03:22.239
some reason, if I decided I
wanted to become an NBA player, yeah,

965
01:03:22.679 --> 01:03:25.679
and I dedicated my entire life to
it, there's no chance in hell

966
01:03:25.840 --> 01:03:30.519
that's a possibility. Like, I
just hate the idea of like just seeing

967
01:03:30.559 --> 01:03:32.400
all the possibilities for your life because
I was always someone that thought like,

968
01:03:32.480 --> 01:03:36.320
you can do anything, just work
hard and you can be anything and just

969
01:03:36.440 --> 01:03:38.920
seeing like scratch that off, scratch
that off. It's mostly like physical stuff,

970
01:03:38.960 --> 01:03:42.280
but you know it's like, right, it's frustrating to me. Oh

971
01:03:42.320 --> 01:03:46.400
and that snowballs after a while.
Oh, I'm sure. My my friend's

972
01:03:46.519 --> 01:03:52.079
mom has a I showed you as
a picture of me when I was little,

973
01:03:52.360 --> 01:03:59.559
like eight or nine. Yeah,
and it's really sweet. It's because

974
01:04:00.000 --> 01:04:01.679
she thinks highly mean same. I
feel the same way for her. But

975
01:04:02.320 --> 01:04:05.800
there's a picture me and tucked in
her little cupboard in her kitchen, and

976
01:04:06.559 --> 01:04:10.840
she sent me a picture of it
the other day and I said, yeah,

977
01:04:10.920 --> 01:04:14.880
back when I had hopes and dreams. And this is not an original

978
01:04:14.960 --> 01:04:16.239
thought, but I think I thought
it was at the time. Maybe it's

979
01:04:16.280 --> 01:04:19.239
not. But you know, some
people have a when you get older.

980
01:04:19.719 --> 01:04:24.719
Instead of a bucket list, you
have a fucket list. It's it's the

981
01:04:24.840 --> 01:04:27.679
list of things that you know aren't
gonna have you're just written off. Yeah,

982
01:04:27.880 --> 01:04:29.800
well, it's kind of what you
were talking about. Here. Here's

983
01:04:29.800 --> 01:04:32.440
a fun one. H is getting
married on your fucket list? Oh?

984
01:04:32.679 --> 01:04:35.920
No, I was it on your
fucking list of things that aren't going to

985
01:04:36.000 --> 01:04:40.840
happen? Getting married again? Yeah? Of course. Okay, I don't

986
01:04:40.880 --> 01:04:44.280
see myself ever going on date again. Sure, sure, I've heard you

987
01:04:44.480 --> 01:04:46.480
at times like what I assumed was
joking like, oh, here's your next

988
01:04:46.519 --> 01:04:48.440
step mom, I know what you
mean. Yeah, I know. So

989
01:04:48.519 --> 01:04:50.920
I didn't know if that was any
part of that, Like, is there

990
01:04:51.079 --> 01:04:56.360
any chance you're ever married again?
Honestly, I don't see myself ever dating

991
01:04:56.360 --> 01:05:00.320
again any desire at all? Oh
no, is there any scenario which,

992
01:05:01.159 --> 01:05:05.960
uh, there's there's a scenario,
but it's never gonna happen. Sure,

993
01:05:06.079 --> 01:05:11.199
sure you know somebody who's extremes.
Oh you're you're whole theory on Jenniger Sean

994
01:05:11.280 --> 01:05:15.119
of course, Well that, but
that's a whole different thing. Wouldn't get

995
01:05:15.119 --> 01:05:18.880
in there. He has aspirations of
dating Sean can Gina, if you're watching,

996
01:05:18.960 --> 01:05:23.719
we can get into that. If
you want to feel free. I

997
01:05:23.840 --> 01:05:26.960
think it's a great thing. Yeah, go into it. I think in

998
01:05:27.039 --> 01:05:30.440
case Gina's watching, yes, Uh
no, The thing was where was I

999
01:05:30.519 --> 01:05:35.079
going with this? Oh? Any
scenario where you see that happening? He's

1000
01:05:35.119 --> 01:05:38.639
what you said or something like that, and in which you'd get married,

1001
01:05:39.039 --> 01:05:41.440
is it? Yeah? I mean, if if it's like the old George

1002
01:05:41.519 --> 01:05:46.000
Costanza thing where he found that woman
who who physically he was reading her profile

1003
01:05:46.119 --> 01:05:49.920
or something and said, physical attractive
and it's not important, wouldn't it versa

1004
01:05:50.000 --> 01:05:54.599
to me? It might have been. I don't remember exactly, but if

1005
01:05:54.639 --> 01:05:57.719
you like stock, if I get
somebody that I was incredibly attracted to and

1006
01:05:57.880 --> 01:06:02.360
was was really smart and really funny
and who didn't give a shit that I'm

1007
01:06:02.480 --> 01:06:09.360
rapidly aging in not a ideal weight
and losing my hair and all the shit

1008
01:06:09.440 --> 01:06:13.559
that happens when you get older,
because she's like me, because whatever reason,

1009
01:06:13.679 --> 01:06:18.679
she's like baseball cards. What was
the old joke? Oh it was

1010
01:06:18.760 --> 01:06:27.119
Carlin said he was looking for a
a nymphomaniac coke dealer who owned a car

1011
01:06:27.199 --> 01:06:32.360
dealership. That's what he was looking
for, very specific. Yeah, yeah,

1012
01:06:32.519 --> 01:06:35.280
oh no, And I'm totally okay
with that. I had, you

1013
01:06:35.360 --> 01:06:38.119
know, I had her. I
had a run and I had my shot,

1014
01:06:38.199 --> 01:06:44.039
and I'm horrible relationships. I realized
that now. Sure I'm not happy

1015
01:06:44.079 --> 01:06:46.039
at him, I'm not good at
him. Oh, I can't see current

1016
01:06:46.159 --> 01:06:49.840
you. There's no one who someone
who just traveled with you for a couple

1017
01:06:49.840 --> 01:06:57.039
of days. I cannot imagine you
living with someone ever again. Oh No,

1018
01:06:57.199 --> 01:07:00.360
I'm way too and entrenched in my
ways now. I mean I always

1019
01:07:00.480 --> 01:07:04.800
was, but I was. I
would try before, Sure, but I

1020
01:07:04.840 --> 01:07:09.760
won't even try now. Yeah.
And anything that makes me get out of

1021
01:07:09.880 --> 01:07:15.920
my habits or my routine, anybody
making it of my house, anybody makes

1022
01:07:15.920 --> 01:07:20.119
me get out of my routine or
not anybody, but anything, I kick

1023
01:07:20.199 --> 01:07:25.000
at it like a mule. Oh
I've noticed. Yeah, yes, Um,

1024
01:07:25.360 --> 01:07:27.719
can we talk about something that doesn't
make me look like an asshole?

1025
01:07:28.039 --> 01:07:30.920
I would stop. I'm not calling
an asshole. Pick of your brain?

1026
01:07:30.039 --> 01:07:34.239
I am. You're calling you an
asshole. I don't think I'm an asshole.

1027
01:07:35.079 --> 01:07:39.679
I think I'm opinionated and stubborn.
Sure, fair, Yeah, what

1028
01:07:39.719 --> 01:07:43.280
do you want to talk about?
I've talked about anything with you. Sure.

1029
01:07:43.559 --> 01:07:45.039
I love talking to you. I'm
talking to you. It's great.

1030
01:07:45.079 --> 01:07:47.559
You're an interesting guy. Dude,
What do you wanna do? You want

1031
01:07:47.599 --> 01:07:49.480
to wrap up this part here and
I'll bring the cameras in and we gon

1032
01:07:49.559 --> 01:07:51.639
just hang out. No, no, you want to keep a coca.

1033
01:07:53.280 --> 01:07:58.320
It's like we're trying to wind down. I really have a chance to talk

1034
01:07:58.400 --> 01:08:01.599
like this, Sure, And you
know what's this happens to me. It's

1035
01:08:01.599 --> 01:08:05.000
happened to me recently. But um, you know, I've got a couple

1036
01:08:05.000 --> 01:08:08.920
of friends that I've dinner with.
You know, it used to be every

1037
01:08:08.960 --> 01:08:11.360
couple of months. Bits with COVID
and everything, it's been whacked. But

1038
01:08:12.079 --> 01:08:18.840
um, church, Um, I
find that I'm so seldom seldom lea is

1039
01:08:18.840 --> 01:08:24.760
that a word? So seldom ly
yeah, around people that when I am

1040
01:08:25.960 --> 01:08:29.840
there's so many things that I realize
I haven't talked about in a while.

1041
01:08:29.960 --> 01:08:34.000
Oh did I tend to? I
feel I feel like I talk way too

1042
01:08:34.079 --> 01:08:39.159
much and dominate conversation. And I've
gone out to dinner. You know,

1043
01:08:39.239 --> 01:08:42.880
these friends, I've gone out to
dinner with them and texted them afterwards and

1044
01:08:43.000 --> 01:08:45.079
said, hey, I'm really sorry
if I talked way too much. But

1045
01:08:45.239 --> 01:08:50.159
I went out to birthday dinner with
my daughter last Saturday night, and I

1046
01:08:50.279 --> 01:08:54.199
had that same sensation because it was
really fun, it was really nice,

1047
01:08:54.640 --> 01:08:58.760
but I felt like I was just
you seem very up in your own head

1048
01:08:58.760 --> 01:09:01.600
about what people like you. You
you were telling me on this trip,

1049
01:09:01.640 --> 01:09:05.439
but like your greatest fear is looking
stupid, and like I think you get

1050
01:09:05.600 --> 01:09:08.840
very up in your own head about
like, oh god, did I do

1051
01:09:08.880 --> 01:09:10.720
this too much? Did I do
that too much? I think you're just

1052
01:09:10.840 --> 01:09:13.119
doesn't anything to do with being stud
feeling stupid. No, I'm just saying

1053
01:09:13.159 --> 01:09:15.199
I think you are up in your
head about how other people view you.

1054
01:09:15.760 --> 01:09:18.640
You don't even really care how other
people view me anymore. Yeah, well,

1055
01:09:18.640 --> 01:09:20.439
I mean even just the way you
were saying about like, oh,

1056
01:09:20.560 --> 01:09:24.279
what's I talking too much? I
doing this? Like, yeah, I

1057
01:09:24.399 --> 01:09:27.880
think you're I think you do that
a lot. Yeah, I think that's

1058
01:09:27.960 --> 01:09:30.399
changed a lot, because there was
a time when there's no way I would

1059
01:09:30.439 --> 01:09:32.800
go like the grocery store of the
post office and my slippers and my hair

1060
01:09:33.439 --> 01:09:36.720
and my hair all fucked up.
Yeah. Yeah, I just don't care,

1061
01:09:38.279 --> 01:09:43.119
I know anymore, because you know, when you're younger, you never

1062
01:09:43.199 --> 01:09:47.760
know when you're gonna meet somebody you
know or strike up a conversation. Sure,

1063
01:09:48.000 --> 01:09:50.000
and when you're young and you have
dreams, you think, God,

1064
01:09:50.119 --> 01:09:53.560
you never know, you might meet
some money in a park bench or something,

1065
01:09:53.640 --> 01:09:57.880
and well it's not always like I'm
meeting somebody thing you know, or

1066
01:09:57.920 --> 01:10:00.760
you just to him about it,
like pride and the parents, or worry

1067
01:10:00.800 --> 01:10:02.359
about what people think of you or
what do you and if you met somebody

1068
01:10:02.359 --> 01:10:05.079
you're interested in. You want to
look your best. But well, but

1069
01:10:05.119 --> 01:10:08.760
what do you think about like what
somebody's married? Like do you think like

1070
01:10:09.800 --> 01:10:12.000
like, do you think people shed
that when they get married because you don't

1071
01:10:12.000 --> 01:10:15.720
want to have them You're talking about
meeting someone you know like to a degree?

1072
01:10:15.880 --> 01:10:19.960
Yeah, yeah, yeah. Do
you think people just like, let's

1073
01:10:20.000 --> 01:10:24.159
just give up on other things when
they get married or well, I mean

1074
01:10:24.199 --> 01:10:26.319
that's how you always view a marriage, was that you have to give up

1075
01:10:26.319 --> 01:10:30.640
all the things you love and and
that wasn't necessarily the way everybody did it.

1076
01:10:30.760 --> 01:10:32.760
That's why I did it. But
I mean, your attitude's about a

1077
01:10:32.800 --> 01:10:35.199
lot of things change as your age
in general, whether you're married or not.

1078
01:10:35.439 --> 01:10:42.000
Yeah, yeah, yeah, this
has been funny so far. I

1079
01:10:42.000 --> 01:10:44.800
don't think I tagged them as comedy. It's gonna be a chat. Can

1080
01:10:44.840 --> 01:10:46.600
I fart on camera? Please give
it a good fart? I have one

1081
01:10:46.680 --> 01:10:49.920
bruin. Yeah, here, I'm
gonna go pee you fart? I got

1082
01:10:50.000 --> 01:10:53.520
pe two. That's gonna look weird. Well no, no, you you

1083
01:10:53.640 --> 01:10:56.680
just sit here in firt now.
Let me for the record state yeah that

1084
01:10:57.119 --> 01:11:00.640
can you hear me? Um?
Yeah, keep talking, Dan super weird

1085
01:11:00.720 --> 01:11:04.319
about. And he's a homeowner now, which I will respect that he likes

1086
01:11:04.399 --> 01:11:09.000
his place to be nice, and
it is nice. But just last night

1087
01:11:09.119 --> 01:11:12.119
or the night before, I'm brought
up the idea of maybe peeing in the

1088
01:11:12.199 --> 01:11:14.399
yard instead of going all the way
in the house. And I said,

1089
01:11:14.479 --> 01:11:16.199
go for it. You all not
at first? What did I say?

1090
01:11:16.399 --> 01:11:21.960
You had the married chip in your
brain kicked in at first, so said

1091
01:11:23.399 --> 01:11:26.680
did I say, no, said
it's night. No. You eventually said

1092
01:11:26.800 --> 01:11:30.520
yes, but your your first instinct
was to hesitate, and you know that's

1093
01:11:30.560 --> 01:11:32.199
true. I thought about it for
a second. I said, go for

1094
01:11:32.319 --> 01:11:36.960
it. Oh that was so kind
of you have anything to do it,

1095
01:11:38.079 --> 01:11:41.319
because you would never done that if
you weren't married. But I was also

1096
01:11:41.439 --> 01:11:45.800
fucking twenty nine. I've seen you
pee off of my deck. How old

1097
01:11:45.920 --> 01:11:49.520
was I like, thirty two?
No, that's not true, No,

1098
01:11:49.720 --> 01:11:53.199
twenty eights. It was your ten
year reunion, right, Like I said,

1099
01:11:53.239 --> 01:11:56.039
I've been married since I was thirty
twenty eight. It's not sixteen.

1100
01:11:56.399 --> 01:11:59.760
I don't know. I was still
a very much a draging dumbass at twenty

1101
01:11:59.800 --> 01:12:02.359
eight. Absolutely, yeah, eventually
you you kicked in and you were like,

1102
01:12:02.520 --> 01:12:05.800
yeah, of course, like most
guys would say, kiss right here

1103
01:12:05.840 --> 01:12:09.920
if you want to. It's not
getting married to change that. It's like

1104
01:12:10.199 --> 01:12:12.680
if I was single and had a
house, I would probably still think for

1105
01:12:12.720 --> 01:12:14.880
a second about it, is it
okay for him to be there? Would

1106
01:12:15.039 --> 01:12:17.159
if you'd stayed single about a house, Yeah, you wouldn't I just say

1107
01:12:17.199 --> 01:12:19.840
pee all over it? You would
have just see it, just thisiss all

1108
01:12:19.880 --> 01:12:25.920
over my living room. You would
have been way different. Okay. Look,

1109
01:12:26.039 --> 01:12:29.159
I love this idea that any change
that's happened with me has happened because

1110
01:12:29.159 --> 01:12:31.479
I got married most of them,
and most of are good. Oh I

1111
01:12:31.520 --> 01:12:34.319
don't think I'm a much better verson
I got married, but like you also

1112
01:12:34.439 --> 01:12:36.800
think that, like, oh you
you you would have been cool and just

1113
01:12:36.880 --> 01:12:42.600
before you married, chipping in a
married chipper. I hear that so much.

1114
01:12:42.680 --> 01:12:45.520
I've never once done this with my
arm. Okay, but you did

1115
01:12:45.680 --> 01:12:47.560
several times today, say the married
chip in your brain made you do this?

1116
01:12:49.439 --> 01:12:53.079
Did you note? Am I making
that out? You've changed a lot,

1117
01:12:53.199 --> 01:12:56.600
and yes, ninety five percent of
it is for the better. Okay,

1118
01:12:57.640 --> 01:13:00.119
but you again, like the toilet's
seats, it's a you know,

1119
01:13:00.279 --> 01:13:06.680
Oh, I'm so right about that. For those nut in the know.

1120
01:13:08.199 --> 01:13:12.840
The short version is, apparently I
picked up a habit since I got married.

1121
01:13:13.039 --> 01:13:15.000
Whereafter I pee, I put the
toilet seat down, both of them,

1122
01:13:15.880 --> 01:13:20.399
Okay, the top lid and the
horseshoe lid. And uh, never

1123
01:13:20.520 --> 01:13:24.359
realized I did that. It's never
a thing Bianca and I ever talked about,

1124
01:13:24.600 --> 01:13:27.359
ever did it before? Right?
Right? No, I believe that

1125
01:13:27.520 --> 01:13:30.640
I believe that I probably picked it
up. I probably picked it up when

1126
01:13:30.680 --> 01:13:33.359
I lived at Bianca in a place
with one toilet, had a consideration for

1127
01:13:33.399 --> 01:13:35.279
her, and had a consideration that, like, hey, she has to

1128
01:13:35.319 --> 01:13:38.239
sit down on this, I'm gonna
always make sure it's put down. And

1129
01:13:38.279 --> 01:13:42.359
I respect that that is where it
came from. I respect that I do

1130
01:13:43.720 --> 01:13:46.800
do clear on me about it.
I do on your own turf. Wait

1131
01:13:46.880 --> 01:13:50.279
what I do in your own house? Oh okay, okay, on your

1132
01:13:50.279 --> 01:13:54.279
own turch when I'm at your place. Yes, and you when your nonfunctioning

1133
01:13:54.319 --> 01:13:57.680
toilet when you come home without her, uh huh. And it's just me

1134
01:13:57.800 --> 01:14:00.840
and you, and I really nicely
asked you, like you have things you'd

1135
01:14:00.880 --> 01:14:02.680
like to be done here, and
you not throwing cigarettes in my yard.

1136
01:14:02.760 --> 01:14:05.600
And I'm a bitch about it,
but I abide by it because it is

1137
01:14:05.640 --> 01:14:10.039
your place. Yes, And you
come home and I really nicely ask you,

1138
01:14:10.199 --> 01:14:14.319
hey, leave the lit up,
yeah and shut up okay, and

1139
01:14:14.479 --> 01:14:15.880
you don't do it. You do
it every time and I call you on

1140
01:14:15.960 --> 01:14:19.159
it every time and your ant russ, I don't even think about it.

1141
01:14:20.279 --> 01:14:23.760
Well, I want you to think
about it. If I keep over here,

1142
01:14:23.840 --> 01:14:26.199
okay, I'm getting fired up.
Now here we go. It's a

1143
01:14:26.279 --> 01:14:30.720
saga. If I came over here
and just blatantly throw cigarette butts in your

1144
01:14:30.800 --> 01:14:32.079
yard and you called me on it, which you should, okay, and

1145
01:14:32.199 --> 01:14:35.359
I just said, I don't even
think about it. Would that would that?

1146
01:14:35.479 --> 01:14:38.920
Would that work for you? I
don't think it's the same thing.

1147
01:14:39.319 --> 01:14:43.760
It's complete. It's the rules you
ask for your guests to abide by,

1148
01:14:44.720 --> 01:14:47.640
and they either do it or they
don't. I think throwing cigarettes in the

1149
01:14:47.720 --> 01:14:51.279
yard is more rageous than putting a
toilet seat down. It's what said.

1150
01:14:51.479 --> 01:14:55.279
I will say. You have asked
me to leave the toilet seat up,

1151
01:14:55.600 --> 01:14:58.520
and I have forgotten a thousand times, and I own up to that,

1152
01:14:58.720 --> 01:15:01.600
and I'm sorry. If that's the
are you like your toilet, I apologize.

1153
01:15:01.800 --> 01:15:05.079
But if I threw cigarettes in yard
and you and I said, I

1154
01:15:05.159 --> 01:15:08.720
don't even think about it. Would
you have taken it as an answer,

1155
01:15:09.880 --> 01:15:13.399
No, because I did. I
just I think we might differ on this

1156
01:15:13.479 --> 01:15:15.920
opinion. I think it's a very
different situation. I don't. It's the

1157
01:15:16.000 --> 01:15:21.640
wishes of the homeowner. When you're
a guest in someone's home, it's very

1158
01:15:21.720 --> 01:15:25.279
kind of them to let you in
their home. The least you can do

1159
01:15:27.000 --> 01:15:30.119
is treat things the way they want
them treated. And I have not intentionally,

1160
01:15:30.399 --> 01:15:32.720
I know, put the toilet seat
down. I don't think you're doing

1161
01:15:32.760 --> 01:15:35.600
it to bug me. No,
absolutely, I honestly don't. Yeah,

1162
01:15:36.479 --> 01:15:42.640
but if you don't think about it, maybe think about it. I will

1163
01:15:42.680 --> 01:15:46.760
try. It's genuinely something I never
thought about outside of you. Bug never

1164
01:15:46.840 --> 01:15:50.399
told me to put the toilet seat
down. No one's ever talked about how

1165
01:15:50.479 --> 01:15:55.840
I leave a toilet seat. I
just it's not I've never thought in that

1166
01:15:55.920 --> 01:15:59.319
way, and it's hard. So
if I if I have forgotten, many

1167
01:15:59.399 --> 01:16:01.239
times, I have apologize. I
can remember a time when it was I

1168
01:16:01.399 --> 01:16:05.920
was fortunate. If you remember to
get the urine in the toilet again.

1169
01:16:06.920 --> 01:16:13.439
Mid twenties. Mid twenties, there
stockbrokers that are in mid twenties with gage

1170
01:16:13.520 --> 01:16:20.319
years. Jesus Christ, I've thought, I've actually thought about, when I

1171
01:16:20.439 --> 01:16:24.680
know you're coming home and staying with
me, to put a note on there,

1172
01:16:25.399 --> 01:16:28.720
please leave the toilet up. Honestly, if it bothers you that much,

1173
01:16:28.880 --> 01:16:31.399
if you do that, it will
work. That will work. So

1174
01:16:31.439 --> 01:16:33.840
if we want to compromise there,
it's not that hard to think. If

1175
01:16:33.880 --> 01:16:36.880
you just want to have a backup. Okay, I have the perfect illustration

1176
01:16:36.920 --> 01:16:43.479
of why I'm right. Okay,
when I'm here, I never, ever,

1177
01:16:43.840 --> 01:16:48.479
ever, ever, ever put both
lids down after I pee. What

1178
01:16:48.560 --> 01:16:54.439
do you mean when I when anywhere
else? Well, that you should if

1179
01:16:54.920 --> 01:16:57.039
I would request that you do,
But anyway, go on, But it's

1180
01:16:57.600 --> 01:16:59.800
no, no, no, I'm
doing exactly what you want when I'm here.

1181
01:16:59.880 --> 01:17:01.279
Is point? What do you mean? Oh, for God's sake,

1182
01:17:03.399 --> 01:17:08.039
No, no, I'm saying it
would be nice if you put the toilet

1183
01:17:08.079 --> 01:17:10.000
seat. Now when you missed the
point, shut up and listen to me.

1184
01:17:10.119 --> 01:17:14.920
Okay, I never pee and then
shut the toilet lids ever. But

1185
01:17:15.119 --> 01:17:18.560
when I'm here, have you noticed
when I've been here that I've never left

1186
01:17:18.640 --> 01:17:23.039
them up? You have? You
definitely have no I had this one was

1187
01:17:23.119 --> 01:17:25.640
up today. I didn't say anything
because it's not a big deal. But

1188
01:17:25.800 --> 01:17:28.560
I've paid like sixty times since I've
been here. Okay, so I may

1189
01:17:28.680 --> 01:17:32.640
missed one and I apologize from that, okay, But like ninety nine percent

1190
01:17:32.640 --> 01:17:35.760
of the time, apparently, sure, I am doing it the way you

1191
01:17:35.880 --> 01:17:39.960
want it. I think about it, okay, because I know it's your

1192
01:17:40.000 --> 01:17:42.600
house. Well, no, here's
the thing. You have anything in your

1193
01:17:42.640 --> 01:17:45.800
head that this is the way.
It's not a way I've ever thought about.

1194
01:17:45.800 --> 01:17:47.479
I've never told you what to do
with my toilet lids while you're here,

1195
01:17:47.640 --> 01:17:51.880
because it's just not a big deal. But I think if I left

1196
01:17:51.920 --> 01:17:55.119
them up, i'd hear about it. You left it up today, and

1197
01:17:55.119 --> 01:17:57.760
you didn't hear about it until now
when you claimed you never leave it up.

1198
01:17:58.000 --> 01:18:00.640
I didn't say anything of you.
I just like dad's here, it's

1199
01:18:00.680 --> 01:18:02.119
gonna happen, But it is.
It is a conscious thing with me,

1200
01:18:02.960 --> 01:18:06.800
okay. And I slept once apparently, okay, But most of the time

1201
01:18:08.840 --> 01:18:12.359
I am thinking about it, and
I'm a guest in your home and I'm

1202
01:18:12.399 --> 01:18:15.680
doing it the way you want.
Why can't Also, it's that's the thing

1203
01:18:15.760 --> 01:18:17.960
it's the way you want it.
It's like I've literally never said anything about

1204
01:18:18.000 --> 01:18:20.239
like do it this way or don't
do it this way? No, because

1205
01:18:20.239 --> 01:18:23.399
I know how you want it.
Because I know how you do it.

1206
01:18:24.680 --> 01:18:28.439
You have thought about this a billion
times more than me or Bianca ever had.

1207
01:18:28.479 --> 01:18:30.399
Oh it makes me nuts when you're
home. That's one of eighty.

1208
01:18:30.600 --> 01:18:36.119
The other one is findling your balls
for hours on end and then finding and

1209
01:18:36.239 --> 01:18:42.720
then grabbed shredded tree shredded cheese out
of my cheese bag with your bare fucking

1210
01:18:44.119 --> 01:18:50.319
Fondling applies to sexualness to it.
Your hands are dad your pants, and

1211
01:18:50.520 --> 01:18:55.600
when I'm just sitting out with your
dumb ass, I even and then you

1212
01:18:55.680 --> 01:19:00.760
go grab cheese with your bare hands. When does that add happened? Name

1213
01:19:00.800 --> 01:19:02.159
the last time that's happened. Well, it hasn't, because I hide the

1214
01:19:02.279 --> 01:19:15.079
cheese. I'm gonna go make a
drink. I'm gonna go grab another log.

1215
01:19:15.399 --> 01:19:17.720
Do you want you want to wrap
up the recording part and we'll out

1216
01:19:17.760 --> 01:19:21.920
here. I want to keep recording. I got more stuff to be all

1217
01:19:23.000 --> 01:19:25.680
right, do you want to?
I got the can drinks here. If

1218
01:19:25.680 --> 01:19:27.880
you want win, you need to
ask your wife. Pee out here.

1219
01:19:29.279 --> 01:19:39.319
Yeah, just pe hi everyone.
I hope you're enjoying the show. Uh

1220
01:19:40.199 --> 01:19:42.920
yeah, you're not in a child, I have joined the show. Uh

1221
01:19:43.000 --> 01:19:46.239
huh, that's right. It's a
good moon. A good moon up there,

1222
01:19:50.720 --> 01:19:58.439
dad. I got ice and whiskey
out here. Yeah, what do

1223
01:19:58.520 --> 01:20:03.600
you want? You like that?
Mellow yellow sunshine bullshit? Mellow yellow sunshine

1224
01:20:03.640 --> 01:20:08.479
bullshit? I have those canned cocktail
things. What are you talking about?

1225
01:20:09.159 --> 01:20:13.279
Oh, storry, storry, Okay, I'll go grab you one. Thank

1226
01:20:13.319 --> 01:20:18.920
you. Are you gonna stir with
your finger? Is that fine? You're

1227
01:20:18.920 --> 01:20:21.960
a tongue all right here. You
gotta come and take the seat so you

1228
01:20:23.000 --> 01:20:27.159
can entertain the folks while I'm grabbing
your mellow yellow bullshit. Time to offer

1229
01:20:27.239 --> 01:20:32.479
clarifications on everything that's been said about
me. Feel free, free mind has

1230
01:20:32.479 --> 01:20:41.920
been an old dentist Larry Song,
I'm a boy. Just uh, what's

1231
01:20:42.079 --> 01:20:45.359
a disclaimer? Is the word I'm
looking for? I could be wrong about

1232
01:20:45.399 --> 01:20:50.680
something like the opinions I've expressed on
this broadcast. The opinions I've expressed have

1233
01:20:50.880 --> 01:20:57.520
nothing to do with the owner of
this toilet lids shutting property. Wasn't his

1234
01:20:57.680 --> 01:21:03.600
fault? These always turned into these
things don't they what. I's just complaining

1235
01:21:03.600 --> 01:21:11.079
about each other. It's kind of
talk. It's just joking with each other

1236
01:21:11.199 --> 01:21:17.000
and yelling at each other. It's
all comes from a good place. It

1237
01:21:17.159 --> 01:21:23.159
does, it does. This is
the relationship. It's always like when Rickles

1238
01:21:23.239 --> 01:21:27.520
was given Paul Schaeffer a hard time, Shaeffer said, but but it comes

1239
01:21:27.600 --> 01:21:30.680
from love, and he goes,
no, it doesn't. I'll be honest,

1240
01:21:30.720 --> 01:21:35.640
I never liked you. How long
are you be gone? I'm grabbing

1241
01:21:36.720 --> 01:21:40.479
fixing the go hug the dogs or
something. Yeah, I gotta go hug

1242
01:21:40.560 --> 01:21:45.960
the dogs. Jesus Christ, I'm
grabbing more logs. By the way,

1243
01:21:46.000 --> 01:21:53.680
Dan's dogs are idiots. We were
watching the Kentucky Derby earlier and they were

1244
01:21:53.960 --> 01:21:57.680
doing the pre race stuff where the
horses were walking out, and one of

1245
01:21:57.720 --> 01:22:01.960
his idiot dogs just went crazy and
went rapped the TV and was barking at

1246
01:22:02.000 --> 01:22:05.399
their horses like he thought they were
in the house or something. They're not

1247
01:22:05.479 --> 01:22:09.960
really smart, but I will admit
they're extremely cute. I don't know if

1248
01:22:09.960 --> 01:22:13.479
any of you have ever seen his
dogs, but they are kind of adorable.

1249
01:22:14.119 --> 01:22:19.960
But they're paying the ass any who. I can't entertain you folks,

1250
01:22:20.039 --> 01:22:25.800
at home by myself without Dan to
playoff of anyway. In all seriousness,

1251
01:22:25.880 --> 01:22:29.840
it's been a great four days with
Dan. He was kind enough to have

1252
01:22:30.000 --> 01:22:36.960
me up here on a milestone birthday. That thing just did think. Yeah,

1253
01:22:38.039 --> 01:22:41.760
the screen went off and then started
keeping goods out battery. No,

1254
01:22:42.159 --> 01:22:48.600
you're good, Yeah, you're good. Who were you talking to earlier day

1255
01:22:48.600 --> 01:22:50.920
about how I didn't wind up my
phone? Oh it was a cameo.

1256
01:22:51.199 --> 01:22:55.800
Yeah, that didn't work because you
have an old guy phone ironically, Yeah,

1257
01:22:56.159 --> 01:22:59.279
speaking of that, we'll get a
plug in here. Dan and I

1258
01:22:59.319 --> 01:23:04.159
are both available for cameos. Mine
are a lot cheaper and a lot less

1259
01:23:04.239 --> 01:23:09.079
loud if you like it and yelled
at and being paid. If you like

1260
01:23:09.199 --> 01:23:14.640
paying somebody to get you to yell
at you, cameo Dane. If you

1261
01:23:14.720 --> 01:23:17.560
want to get really shitty of life
advice from an old guy, cameo me,

1262
01:23:18.439 --> 01:23:21.279
and I'm a lot cheaper. I
don't know how much you charges,

1263
01:23:21.319 --> 01:23:26.720
but I think mine is fifteen bucks
or ten or something like that. But

1264
01:23:27.840 --> 01:23:31.000
I think it's absolutely ridiculous that I
have any cameo requests at all, but

1265
01:23:31.119 --> 01:23:35.880
I do appreciate the ones I get. I don't have that that much good

1266
01:23:35.880 --> 01:23:42.000
advice to offer. I actually had
one tonight where someone was celebrating their seventh

1267
01:23:42.079 --> 01:23:48.399
wedding anniversary and they wanted advice from
me on relationships. Seems bad idea.

1268
01:23:50.079 --> 01:23:54.680
It'll conceit. You put way to
me. Logs in here for how long

1269
01:23:54.720 --> 01:23:56.960
we're gonna be out of here?
I didn't know we had a limit.

1270
01:23:57.119 --> 01:24:00.920
I could do this for another two
hours. Yeah. Can the folks at

1271
01:24:00.960 --> 01:24:03.880
home know that we did another folks
at home thing? Yeah? It was

1272
01:24:03.880 --> 01:24:06.560
a twitch thing. They can't really
watch it now it's not live. Here's

1273
01:24:06.560 --> 01:24:12.960
your thing? Don't the archive those
for sixty days? I enjoyed that hell

1274
01:24:13.000 --> 01:24:15.399
out of that. Well, that's
the thing that drives me nuts. There

1275
01:24:15.439 --> 01:24:17.439
are so many things I know you
would love and that you can do easily,

1276
01:24:17.840 --> 01:24:21.840
and I know you won't do like
you could do anytime you went to

1277
01:24:23.119 --> 01:24:26.119
any night and there's no It's like
Uber. You know you can just Uber

1278
01:24:26.159 --> 01:24:29.840
whenever you went to and I don't. Yeah, yeah, I could exactly.

1279
01:24:30.079 --> 01:24:31.439
I could set you up with your
laptops where you open up a thing,

1280
01:24:31.720 --> 01:24:34.439
you hit go live, and you're
just like, ask me questions.

1281
01:24:34.720 --> 01:24:39.560
I have no doubts it could happen. I just don't think that there would

1282
01:24:39.560 --> 01:24:42.520
be enough people interested. I mean, you literally had over four hundred people

1283
01:24:42.560 --> 01:24:45.760
watching you tonight because of you.
Well, but they're also saying when when

1284
01:24:45.800 --> 01:24:47.560
we brought this up, there were
all those people saying like, no,

1285
01:24:47.600 --> 01:24:49.319
no, Paul, we're here for
you. We would watch you, we

1286
01:24:49.359 --> 01:24:54.680
would follow you, like I guarantee
you would, like Kayla didn't have an

1287
01:24:54.680 --> 01:24:57.960
audience beforehand, and like you know, she has a great twitch audience.

1288
01:24:58.000 --> 01:25:01.399
She's very talented. Like you would
you would do fine, you would do

1289
01:25:01.439 --> 01:25:04.119
absolutely fine, I guarantee, and
I would help. I would push you.

1290
01:25:05.680 --> 01:25:09.880
Could we do a telelink thing where
you're involved in some of them?

1291
01:25:10.039 --> 01:25:15.000
Telelink? Is it telelink? Hook
up the satellites? What happened the TV?

1292
01:25:16.680 --> 01:25:21.439
That's a big question. I'm serious, get specifically, what are you

1293
01:25:21.439 --> 01:25:26.359
asking? Comes so splintered? Yeah, it's bad, it's streaming happened.

1294
01:25:26.560 --> 01:25:30.239
It's people got tired of spending one
hundred and twenty dollars a month. But

1295
01:25:30.399 --> 01:25:33.680
is it better now? There was
a time when it was good where it

1296
01:25:33.840 --> 01:25:39.239
was like the Netflix and Hulu and
maybe the early days like the Amazon stuff,

1297
01:25:39.600 --> 01:25:43.000
and it was easy enough to where
it was another option. Yeah,

1298
01:25:43.079 --> 01:25:47.680
Like I haven't paid for cable since
two thousand and nine twenty ten, right,

1299
01:25:48.319 --> 01:25:50.920
And there was a time when that
was just totally fine. You know,

1300
01:25:50.960 --> 01:25:55.279
you can see everything you want to
see, like I'd see SNL or

1301
01:25:55.359 --> 01:25:58.279
whatever you know on Hulu the day
after, you know, like it.

1302
01:25:58.640 --> 01:26:01.079
You can get all this stuff you
want to get. Now, everything went

1303
01:26:01.239 --> 01:26:05.000
so hard into that that everyone had
to get their piece of the pie.

1304
01:26:05.079 --> 01:26:08.680
And now you got your paramount pluses
and you got your peacocks, and you've

1305
01:26:08.680 --> 01:26:12.079
got all these different funding Roku and
TB and fucking a million things that no

1306
01:26:12.119 --> 01:26:15.560
one subscribes to, and there's so
many things that they're trying to gobble up

1307
01:26:15.760 --> 01:26:18.159
exclusive shows where it's like, oh, you can only watch this show on

1308
01:26:18.199 --> 01:26:23.520
Peacock, and so now you can't
just watch everything. You got to pick

1309
01:26:23.560 --> 01:26:26.159
and choose, like, okay,
these things are important to me, so

1310
01:26:26.239 --> 01:26:30.399
I have to subscribe to streaming service
ABC and D. You know, it's

1311
01:26:30.479 --> 01:26:33.600
just it's worse than I don't know
if it's cable was way too fucking expensive,

1312
01:26:33.600 --> 01:26:35.600
but at least you've got it all
in one place, right, you

1313
01:26:35.640 --> 01:26:40.479
know. I have two great examples, like a year ago when that Beatles

1314
01:26:40.520 --> 01:26:43.640
documentary came out. I want to
see so bad. It's on Disney Plus,

1315
01:26:44.279 --> 01:26:46.079
yeah, which I am not.
I don't have Cloud on either yet.

1316
01:26:46.119 --> 01:26:49.000
And I've got I've got Direct TV, I've got Hulu, I've got

1317
01:26:49.119 --> 01:26:51.960
Netflix. You'd think you've got pretty
much all of it through me. Yeah,

1318
01:26:53.479 --> 01:26:55.520
except direct to the I don't see
you paying that bill. No,

1319
01:26:56.840 --> 01:27:00.880
But you know, something like the
Beatles thing or the Reggie and documentary or

1320
01:27:00.920 --> 01:27:04.119
come up and it's on splinter vision
or whatever. I don't love splinter Vision.

1321
01:27:04.239 --> 01:27:06.560
I'm like, I can't get enough. And I don't even know if

1322
01:27:06.560 --> 01:27:11.920
I have splinter Vision. I don't
think you do, And so I don't

1323
01:27:11.920 --> 01:27:14.039
get to see that ship. I
know. No, It's that's the thing.

1324
01:27:14.479 --> 01:27:16.279
I if you would have talked to
me five ten years ago about the

1325
01:27:16.319 --> 01:27:18.960
streaming future and all that stuff,
it would have been like, yeah,

1326
01:27:19.000 --> 01:27:21.560
this is the way the future.
It's so much better than cable. Now,

1327
01:27:21.800 --> 01:27:27.359
it's just it's gotten fucked. So
I saw on the news the Netflix

1328
01:27:27.520 --> 01:27:30.119
is um which I can't believe they
hadn't none right, but they're doing away

1329
01:27:30.159 --> 01:27:33.239
with the mail order, Like,
oh yeah, that's when I was a

1330
01:27:33.319 --> 01:27:36.760
mail here. There's a lot of
those. Yeah, that's crazy, that's

1331
01:27:38.720 --> 01:27:43.319
very antiquated. Now I'll give you
another example of Dan being an idiot.

1332
01:27:44.720 --> 01:27:46.840
Wait a minute, I need whiskey
and ice. Are you good for another

1333
01:27:46.880 --> 01:27:53.199
hour? But i'd soapen a beer. Do you have a thing to get

1334
01:27:53.239 --> 01:27:57.479
this out with? Just poured in? Pour one indie or just grab the

1335
01:27:57.520 --> 01:27:59.319
ice. I don't give a shit. Grab grab the ice? You know?

1336
01:27:59.520 --> 01:28:00.680
Yes, you're I'm yeah, you're
weirdo about that? I'm fine?

1337
01:28:01.479 --> 01:28:04.920
Were you eating cheese earlier? I
was mainly describing my balls. I skipped

1338
01:28:05.000 --> 01:28:11.279
cheese. You should just grab the
cheese with your balls. There's no opposable

1339
01:28:11.359 --> 01:28:15.439
thumbs on my balls. It's a
sentence I've never thought right to hear.

1340
01:28:17.840 --> 01:28:23.119
Okay, why am I an eddiot? Well? You get three hours?

1341
01:28:24.880 --> 01:28:27.359
Only got so much better on these
campus. How much film? Are you

1342
01:28:27.399 --> 01:28:38.600
gott film? Can I tell about
my first bachelor party? Sure? You

1343
01:28:38.680 --> 01:28:42.600
know where I'm going? Oh yeah, That's something makes me sound really old.

1344
01:28:43.520 --> 01:28:46.600
Is when I get married the first
time in nineteen eighty three, which

1345
01:28:46.680 --> 01:28:53.199
was forty years ago. Next month, hit a bachelor party with all my

1346
01:28:53.600 --> 01:29:02.079
eighteen year old friends. Jesus,
that sounds so stupid. Um my best,

1347
01:29:02.239 --> 01:29:08.119
my best man. We got a
porno film. It was unreal to

1348
01:29:08.239 --> 01:29:12.760
real tape. They had to rent
a machine and a real to real thing.

1349
01:29:14.800 --> 01:29:17.199
That sounds ancient. It does.
Well. You met Bob Hope.

1350
01:29:18.720 --> 01:29:24.079
I've had a conversation with Bob that's
crazy. That does make me feel very

1351
01:29:24.119 --> 01:29:30.159
old. And Carl Reiner, it
doesn't even sound possible. You were there.

1352
01:29:30.560 --> 01:29:32.359
I know, you know, I
know. So where was it we're

1353
01:29:32.399 --> 01:29:36.399
talking about me? I'm an idiot
about something. Oh I lost it?

1354
01:29:36.600 --> 01:29:40.359
Damn it. Well, it shouldn't
take long to think of something. Um

1355
01:29:40.960 --> 01:29:43.560
speak of me, be an idiot. Here's the thing that I realized and

1356
01:29:43.920 --> 01:29:46.039
thought about. And I don't have
a good answer for why is it that

1357
01:29:46.279 --> 01:29:49.760
you? Because you brought up several
times on this trip that your biggest fear

1358
01:29:50.000 --> 01:29:54.399
in life is looking stupid. Right. You've talked about like we uh,

1359
01:29:54.680 --> 01:29:57.039
we had to ask people to move
because they were sitting in our seats at

1360
01:29:57.079 --> 01:30:00.840
Fenway and you had a fucking like
forty minute meltdown. Uh. You've talked

1361
01:30:00.840 --> 01:30:03.039
about your greatest fear in life is
like your car breaking down at a at

1362
01:30:03.079 --> 01:30:06.439
a red light and you're you're holding
up traffic, Like your greatest fear is

1363
01:30:06.560 --> 01:30:11.319
looking stupid. I honestly, yeah, it's it's it triggers something in me,

1364
01:30:11.840 --> 01:30:15.760
a reaction that I don't get any
other way in life. I it's

1365
01:30:16.239 --> 01:30:19.840
it's I freak the hell out well, and that's not is there a through

1366
01:30:19.920 --> 01:30:25.880
line? Is there a connection at
all? In you are terrified of it

1367
01:30:25.960 --> 01:30:29.159
and avoid it at all costs,
And I kind of run towards it.

1368
01:30:29.720 --> 01:30:31.720
I kind of like invite, like
I it's it's not all fake or anything

1369
01:30:31.760 --> 01:30:35.359
like that, but I run into
it, you know, not always what's

1370
01:30:35.399 --> 01:30:41.640
not always Jose Peppers oh the dance? Yeah? Oh yeah, yeah,

1371
01:30:41.720 --> 01:30:44.439
no, no, I'm an don't
get me wrong, but like I definitely

1372
01:30:44.960 --> 01:30:47.119
push further into it. And I
like anytime I have a stupid thought,

1373
01:30:47.560 --> 01:30:50.439
I like make a point like here
here, this happens all the time with

1374
01:30:50.600 --> 01:30:56.399
like me and bog where h oh. Like for instance, for instance,

1375
01:30:56.479 --> 01:30:59.239
today we're watching the Kentucky Derby.
Oh I remember it was, but go

1376
01:30:59.239 --> 01:31:01.640
ahead? Yeah yeah. So so
today we were watching the Kentucky Derby and

1377
01:31:01.720 --> 01:31:05.239
they were talking about something about this
horse coming from Dubai, and I had

1378
01:31:05.279 --> 01:31:09.720
the thought in my head. I
thought, oh, is the Kentucky Derby

1379
01:31:09.800 --> 01:31:13.880
this year in Dubai and I thought, no, dipshit, it's in Kentucky.

1380
01:31:14.239 --> 01:31:16.119
But then I still was like,
Okay, well I gotta tell you

1381
01:31:16.239 --> 01:31:18.039
this, and like, you know, because I think it's funny, So

1382
01:31:18.199 --> 01:31:21.159
like, why is it that?
Like I could easily avoid certain things,

1383
01:31:21.800 --> 01:31:25.159
but I'm like, you need to
know how dumb this is? This thought?

1384
01:31:25.239 --> 01:31:27.520
You know? Why do I invite
it? And you I wasn't.

1385
01:31:27.560 --> 01:31:30.039
I wouldn't have hesitated that situation to
point it out to somebody I care about.

1386
01:31:30.279 --> 01:31:33.560
It's strangers. Well, but like
I'm my full fucking job is being

1387
01:31:33.560 --> 01:31:36.960
a dip shit on the internet,
Like why do I? But I genuinely

1388
01:31:36.960 --> 01:31:43.000
don't know why. In part of
you knows that they're actively looking you up

1389
01:31:43.800 --> 01:31:49.600
for that reason because they want to
hear me say dumb shit about egg whites

1390
01:31:49.640 --> 01:31:53.319
or whatever. Yeah, and they
half of the people will love you for

1391
01:31:53.399 --> 01:31:55.239
it, and they have the people
hate you for it. Yeah, it's

1392
01:31:55.239 --> 01:32:00.359
amazing how many people like you're egg
whites. Dan, you're very polar Oh

1393
01:32:00.479 --> 01:32:03.399
don't don't. Yeah, I want
to. I remember why Dan's an idiot.

1394
01:32:04.000 --> 01:32:13.000
I just looked at him. Um
no, the guy thought of the

1395
01:32:13.039 --> 01:32:16.600
fire pit. Last time I was
here, we had this raging fire pit

1396
01:32:16.920 --> 01:32:23.399
full of fire, and I had
a cigarette butt and I wanted to throw

1397
01:32:23.479 --> 01:32:28.399
it in the fire, and he
had to think about it whether he was

1398
01:32:28.479 --> 01:32:32.279
okay with that. There's a lot
to ascribe to me. Maybe pausing for

1399
01:32:32.399 --> 01:32:35.239
a second sometime, it's like,
no, you didn't want to let me

1400
01:32:35.319 --> 01:32:40.920
throw the cigarette butt in the fire. You know that's true. That may

1401
01:32:41.319 --> 01:32:44.800
I think that was the same trip
as the initial cigarette fiasco in the lawn,

1402
01:32:45.000 --> 01:32:47.600
right, And that was I think
I was considering like retaliatory, like

1403
01:32:48.039 --> 01:32:51.039
nah, fuck you, look,
you're not You gotta figure out some annoying

1404
01:32:51.159 --> 01:32:54.680
place to put your cigarettes. You
don't get an easy out because you wanted

1405
01:32:54.720 --> 01:32:57.840
to fill my yard with them.
But honestly, if you're trying to get

1406
01:32:57.920 --> 01:33:00.640
rid of a cigarette, but there's
no better place for a cigarette, but

1407
01:33:00.399 --> 01:33:03.399
there's no downside to throw. When
you want to kill a terminator, the

1408
01:33:03.479 --> 01:33:10.319
best place to its jump. You've
tried everything else. That's weird of a

1409
01:33:10.439 --> 01:33:14.560
jump as the original cigarette fiasco.
When you said, do you think when

1410
01:33:14.560 --> 01:33:17.159
those men were going into Omaha Beach
on the landing ships, when they smoked

1411
01:33:17.199 --> 01:33:20.560
their last cigarette heading into certain death, do you think they thought twice about

1412
01:33:20.560 --> 01:33:25.119
throwing their cigarette into the ocean.
Yeah, you're comparing my Connecticut yard to

1413
01:33:25.239 --> 01:33:29.199
fucking d Day you made. Yeah
it was amplified, of course, but

1414
01:33:29.479 --> 01:33:31.960
it's slightly Yeah, it was the
same basis. Yeah, it's exactly the

1415
01:33:32.079 --> 01:33:36.279
same. Yes, it's crazy,
but it's like a terminator. You've shot

1416
01:33:36.359 --> 01:33:41.439
him, You've blown him up.
It's not like a terminator. Hit him

1417
01:33:41.479 --> 01:33:45.520
with missiles. Nothing's working. You
throw him in a goddamn melt lava steel

1418
01:33:45.600 --> 01:33:48.560
thing. It's all over. He
gives you a thumbs up, and it's

1419
01:33:48.600 --> 01:33:53.479
all over. Well, he threw
himself into that. It had been funny

1420
01:33:53.479 --> 01:33:56.039
if my cigarette but had a little
tiny thumbs up as I threw it in

1421
01:33:56.119 --> 01:34:01.479
there. Oh but you did hesitate
and you had to think about it.

1422
01:34:02.960 --> 01:34:06.319
I know, but I don't.
At no point did I actually think that

1423
01:34:06.359 --> 01:34:10.720
there'd be a downside until like you
throwing a cigarette in there. Pause,

1424
01:34:11.279 --> 01:34:14.039
because I was pissed at you about
the yard thing, and I was like,

1425
01:34:14.199 --> 01:34:15.680
no, it's too easy. You
need to need to I need to

1426
01:34:15.720 --> 01:34:20.079
annoy you more. But but if
the objective of your decision is to make

1427
01:34:20.119 --> 01:34:26.000
sure that it doesn't clutter your house
up or make it look trashy. Isn't

1428
01:34:26.000 --> 01:34:28.920
a fire the best place for it? Yes? Again, I'm not arguing

1429
01:34:29.000 --> 01:34:30.560
that the fire is a good place
for the cigarette. It's fine. It's

1430
01:34:30.560 --> 01:34:35.119
a place for your face too.
That beard would make you go up quick

1431
01:34:35.159 --> 01:34:41.600
too. This video is gonna have
a weird ending. What you being your

1432
01:34:41.640 --> 01:34:46.119
son's head into a fire? No, because you're my ride to New York.

1433
01:34:46.439 --> 01:34:51.039
Oh right, right, that's right, my free ride to New York.

1434
01:34:51.239 --> 01:34:56.000
Yes. God, we did discover
in Boston the Uber drivers are not

1435
01:34:56.359 --> 01:34:59.600
very talkative. But I kept bringing
up that I think all of our Uber

1436
01:35:00.479 --> 01:35:03.159
drivers were not English was not their
first language. Maybe, but you can

1437
01:35:03.279 --> 01:35:09.680
express friendliness withoutline. None of them
seemed unfriendly. It just it wasn't the

1438
01:35:10.039 --> 01:35:12.359
conversation. They were just doing a
job. I guess. Yes, Yes,

1439
01:35:13.439 --> 01:35:15.079
that's one thing you learn when you're
a driver. You can pretty much

1440
01:35:15.119 --> 01:35:21.720
assess within eight seconds if people want
you to talk. Oh man. I've

1441
01:35:21.800 --> 01:35:26.439
had some living where I live like
it takes forever to get to the airport,

1442
01:35:27.039 --> 01:35:30.079
and I've gotten into a few where
it's like it's just I'm tired or

1443
01:35:30.079 --> 01:35:33.640
I'm nervous about a flight or something, and it's like this, Yeah,

1444
01:35:33.680 --> 01:35:39.199
but not just talkative, but like
talks about you know, just fucking weird

1445
01:35:39.279 --> 01:35:42.800
things or opinions or politics and stuff
that I just I or in the morning

1446
01:35:42.800 --> 01:35:44.680
when I better go on a flight. The last thing I want to do

1447
01:35:45.439 --> 01:35:48.600
is somebody talking to me about some
fucking conspiracy thing or yeah, you've got

1448
01:35:48.720 --> 01:35:53.119
to you've got to read the room. I mean, when I'm driving,

1449
01:35:53.239 --> 01:35:59.840
if I let them start and if
they engage in conversation, I can run.

1450
01:36:00.159 --> 01:36:02.199
I can talk the whole trip if
you want to. If you immediately,

1451
01:36:02.319 --> 01:36:05.199
the key is for me is if
you immediately, if your face is

1452
01:36:05.239 --> 01:36:10.079
in your phone, oh then yeah. And I know. I mean I've

1453
01:36:10.119 --> 01:36:12.680
had so many trips where you never
say a word. If I am in

1454
01:36:12.800 --> 01:36:15.239
like full on, like I cannot
be talking today, like I will just

1455
01:36:15.359 --> 01:36:18.000
kind of like put headphones in or
something. Yeah, like tilt my head

1456
01:36:18.039 --> 01:36:21.000
back and close my eyes, you
know, like I yeah. Yeah.

1457
01:36:21.119 --> 01:36:26.039
And if you know, if you
if you understand people all, you can

1458
01:36:26.079 --> 01:36:30.479
read those signs. Yeah, but
some people are clueless to signs. I

1459
01:36:30.560 --> 01:36:33.479
always use you as my That's when
I feel like an asshole. For like,

1460
01:36:33.840 --> 01:36:38.079
if I land at Newark, I
gotta come all the way. I

1461
01:36:38.159 --> 01:36:41.680
hear Connecticut it's like an hour and
a half drive, and like it's always

1462
01:36:41.720 --> 01:36:44.399
the time when I get in the
car and that's when they see like how

1463
01:36:44.439 --> 01:36:47.159
far they gotta go and they're like, oh, Connecticut huh. And I'm

1464
01:36:47.199 --> 01:36:49.479
like, yeah, I'm sorry,
I know it's a pain. And my

1465
01:36:49.600 --> 01:36:53.479
dad's driver in Kansas, Oh,
I know it's a pain. So I

1466
01:36:53.520 --> 01:36:57.039
always use that. It's like,
sorry, they have another choice, but

1467
01:36:57.119 --> 01:36:59.880
they should know that before they commit
to accepting it. Well, it's weird.

1468
01:37:00.000 --> 01:37:01.600
It's like I'll book these things,
but it's just you know what happens.

1469
01:37:01.600 --> 01:37:04.319
I can tell you what happens.
They see the dollar amount exactly and

1470
01:37:04.399 --> 01:37:09.079
then like I sometimes I will like
schedule a thing and they will call me

1471
01:37:09.159 --> 01:37:11.119
and they'll be like, hey,
are you going into the city or where

1472
01:37:11.119 --> 01:37:13.279
are you going? Or like what
say are you going to And it's like,

1473
01:37:13.680 --> 01:37:15.720
sorry, I don't do that.
I've got an end to cars.

1474
01:37:15.920 --> 01:37:16.760
And they've been like sorry, I'm
going to the city. I don't do

1475
01:37:16.800 --> 01:37:19.039
that and kick me out of the
car. You know. It's yeah,

1476
01:37:19.119 --> 01:37:24.239
Well, the thing is when you
get an offer when you're driving, it

1477
01:37:24.439 --> 01:37:29.800
shows you the time it's going to
take. But it's a human being you're

1478
01:37:29.800 --> 01:37:32.520
really focused on the dollar amount because
every one you're deciding if it's worth your

1479
01:37:32.600 --> 01:37:36.159
while. So if you see like
a thirty dollars to you know trip,

1480
01:37:36.439 --> 01:37:39.560
yeah, your instinct is, oh, hell yeah, I'll take that.

1481
01:37:39.680 --> 01:37:42.520
But you don't look at the time. And the thing is the offer is

1482
01:37:42.560 --> 01:37:45.119
only good for a few seconds.
It beeps away, well not right away.

1483
01:37:45.119 --> 01:37:48.399
It gives you, like i'd say, four or five seconds where you've

1484
01:37:48.399 --> 01:37:50.640
got it. Either it's pretty right
away. You've got to either decline it

1485
01:37:50.760 --> 01:37:57.960
or accept it. So I pretty
quickly learned. I call it time and

1486
01:37:58.079 --> 01:38:00.760
money. What's what's the time I'm
involved in? What's the money? Yeah?

1487
01:38:03.399 --> 01:38:06.760
M But I need to get back
into that because I really do enjoy

1488
01:38:06.800 --> 01:38:11.119
it. I feel like there's been
like four times that you've kind of quit

1489
01:38:11.439 --> 01:38:15.119
for like a dumb reason, or
it's like someone something about like after COVID

1490
01:38:15.359 --> 01:38:18.640
or something like something about your cigarette
ashes or something. What was you had

1491
01:38:18.720 --> 01:38:21.159
some reasons? Well, when I
started, I had been smoking in the

1492
01:38:21.239 --> 01:38:27.520
car for like eight years yea,
And I when I committed to trying it,

1493
01:38:27.680 --> 01:38:30.600
seeing what it was like, I
went and paid like seventy bucks to

1494
01:38:30.640 --> 01:38:35.000
in my car professionally cleaned, which
for me, but I did it.

1495
01:38:35.560 --> 01:38:41.880
And but I broke down here once
a while and would smoke in the car,

1496
01:38:42.119 --> 01:38:45.039
you know, my personal time.
Sure, and then you got to

1497
01:38:45.039 --> 01:38:46.840
spray it down and get all the
smell out of there, because that's not

1498
01:38:46.920 --> 01:38:51.159
a good thing. Nobody wants that. I get that. Um, I

1499
01:38:51.279 --> 01:38:56.800
forget where I was going. But
but I haven't smoked in the car and

1500
01:38:57.399 --> 01:39:01.119
probably ten months, but I hardly
ever, so in a way it was

1501
01:39:01.199 --> 01:39:04.720
good because if you don't smoke in
the crest, smoking in the car,

1502
01:39:04.760 --> 01:39:10.479
there's a lot of it, a
lot of what smoking. If you can

1503
01:39:10.880 --> 01:39:14.520
stop doing that, that cuts a
lot back. You have had a lot

1504
01:39:14.600 --> 01:39:17.239
of strong opinions about smoking these days. I do, and they're getting stronger.

1505
01:39:17.399 --> 01:39:24.279
The society is getting ridiculous. Fenway
was a great example. Hated that

1506
01:39:24.840 --> 01:39:30.199
that's stupid. First of all,
at a ball game, you're outside in

1507
01:39:30.239 --> 01:39:35.279
the first place, and I get
maybe maybe like if you're smoking and there's

1508
01:39:35.319 --> 01:39:38.800
a family and there's a three or
four year old right next to you,

1509
01:39:39.319 --> 01:39:42.279
I get it. You don't want
to smoke next to a kid. I

1510
01:39:42.439 --> 01:39:46.640
get that. But if you're in
a like at Kaufman in Kansas City,

1511
01:39:47.039 --> 01:39:50.119
where there's going to be like a
third fold and you're in the upper deck

1512
01:39:50.399 --> 01:39:55.239
and there's no one with that hundred
feet of you. It's ridiculous that you

1513
01:39:55.319 --> 01:39:58.119
have smoked. And if you want
to, and you want to do it

1514
01:39:58.279 --> 01:40:02.439
legally, you gotta this holding pen
way outside the stadium. Kaufman. It's

1515
01:40:02.479 --> 01:40:05.800
bad, but it's within the parameters
of the ballpark. Sure, Fenway.

1516
01:40:06.239 --> 01:40:11.279
You literally couldn't smoke anywhere on the
grounds. And if you want to smoke,

1517
01:40:11.319 --> 01:40:14.439
you had to leave the grounds and
you can't get back in. That's

1518
01:40:14.560 --> 01:40:18.720
taken it way too far. I
agree that restaurants, the beer, the

1519
01:40:19.000 --> 01:40:23.720
bourbon's kicking in. Oh you're pointing, Oh, here we go. I

1520
01:40:23.920 --> 01:40:29.760
agree. I agree about the whole. When restaurants started, I get the

1521
01:40:29.760 --> 01:40:31.920
airplanes, and I get that restaurant's
airplanes. I get it. Yeah,

1522
01:40:32.199 --> 01:40:36.560
any open air bars, I thought, well, you have to be a

1523
01:40:36.600 --> 01:40:40.520
private club. No, But what
do you think do you think bars should

1524
01:40:40.520 --> 01:40:43.680
be? Should vand selfishly I think
you should be able to, But I

1525
01:40:43.840 --> 01:40:46.399
get it that a lot of people
wouldn't. But if you make the decision

1526
01:40:46.439 --> 01:40:48.960
to allow smoking, which I think
you should have that option as a bar

1527
01:40:49.039 --> 01:40:56.239
owner, you're you're limiting your customer
base. But if you want to do

1528
01:40:56.319 --> 01:40:58.159
that, I think you should be
able to. And you know what,

1529
01:40:58.279 --> 01:41:01.560
I think it'd be great for business. I mean if if the bar was

1530
01:41:01.680 --> 01:41:05.359
like advertised like hey, we're the
smoker friendly Barye. But you got to

1531
01:41:05.439 --> 01:41:09.680
really think that, like that's our
demographic, that's our crowd, Like well,

1532
01:41:09.720 --> 01:41:11.479
you know, because if you're going
all in on that, you know,

1533
01:41:11.760 --> 01:41:14.840
well, that's why I like private
clubs like the Eagles Lodges, And

1534
01:41:15.319 --> 01:41:16.600
I think maybe I've been at VF
i'd be in a long time, but

1535
01:41:17.159 --> 01:41:21.800
I know Eagles Lodges you can smoke
in, and the demographic is like dead

1536
01:41:21.920 --> 01:41:27.439
and between seventy and dead. Put
it this way. So the Red Balloon

1537
01:41:28.359 --> 01:41:31.560
where I was, I wouldn't exist
without that bar seventy seventh Street in Kansas,

1538
01:41:33.680 --> 01:41:38.840
seventy fifth Street. When I was
first of drinking age, it was

1539
01:41:38.920 --> 01:41:42.119
notorious as like well, if you
go to the Red Balloon, you better

1540
01:41:42.159 --> 01:41:45.399
be used to all your clothes reeking
of cigarette. And when I first really

1541
01:41:45.399 --> 01:41:47.760
because it was like when I first
started going there, it's probably like oh

1542
01:41:47.880 --> 01:41:50.159
six oh seven, you know,
and that's kind of round. When things

1543
01:41:50.199 --> 01:41:53.600
started changing and it's like, man, if I'm going to the balloon,

1544
01:41:53.720 --> 01:41:58.239
my ship's gonna reek for a few
days and then they change it. Do

1545
01:41:58.319 --> 01:42:03.119
you think nowadays if the Red Balloon, a very dingy dive bar karaoke joint

1546
01:42:03.159 --> 01:42:06.880
in Kansas said hey, we're cool
with cigarettes, and it was night after

1547
01:42:08.000 --> 01:42:11.279
night filled with smoke, do you
think their bottom line, even if they're

1548
01:42:11.319 --> 01:42:13.800
making more money or less money.
I think they'd lose a third and gain

1549
01:42:13.840 --> 01:42:17.920
a third. Do you think pretty
even? Yeah? Interesting? I do.

1550
01:42:19.359 --> 01:42:23.600
Yeah, But it's the way And
I was talking to you earlier.

1551
01:42:23.920 --> 01:42:26.439
The thing that's cracking me up now
is when you turn on a TV show

1552
01:42:26.880 --> 01:42:31.479
and it used to be nudity,
suggestive situations, violence, adult topics,

1553
01:42:31.560 --> 01:42:35.760
whatever, and now they're including smoking. Yeah, come on, I mean

1554
01:42:35.800 --> 01:42:39.319
that's been a thing for like video
games have had that on a long time.

1555
01:42:39.319 --> 01:42:41.640
It's like, oh, you know, alcohol, you smoking tobacco.

1556
01:42:41.800 --> 01:42:47.760
You know, come on, shield
your eyes, kids, someone's smoking.

1557
01:42:47.880 --> 01:42:50.840
Well, I mean the more obvious
thing that everyone's said forever is like,

1558
01:42:50.880 --> 01:42:55.359
it's crazy that like just grew some
fucking violence in prime time is fine,

1559
01:42:55.399 --> 01:43:00.359
but a fucking boob is well yeah
that that started no war? Really,

1560
01:43:01.880 --> 01:43:05.079
Yeah, because you know, that
was when porn was trying to become more

1561
01:43:05.239 --> 01:43:12.239
mainstream. But you know, they
were broadcasting images from Vietnam of kids getting

1562
01:43:12.720 --> 01:43:16.680
killed in Vietnam, and that was
okay on the news. Well, there's

1563
01:43:16.760 --> 01:43:20.359
always the argument of like what's newsworthy
and what's pornographic? And I'm talking about

1564
01:43:20.359 --> 01:43:24.640
like nowadays, like you know,
like primetime TV for decades now, it's

1565
01:43:24.640 --> 01:43:28.600
been CSIS and stuff and grewsome murders
and stuff like that of fictionalized stuff.

1566
01:43:28.640 --> 01:43:30.840
You know, right, that's been
fine, like with no newsworthy element.

1567
01:43:31.479 --> 01:43:33.760
You know, if I had to
say that, the biggest change I've seen,

1568
01:43:34.479 --> 01:43:38.840
at least in this country with society, and I'm not offended by it

1569
01:43:38.880 --> 01:43:42.520
because I'm old and my kids are
grown and I don't care. But I'm

1570
01:43:42.560 --> 01:43:48.920
just aware of how much it's changed
is how often you hear swearing in public.

1571
01:43:49.600 --> 01:43:54.039
I just don't think that matters.
And it doesnt matter obviously because you

1572
01:43:54.159 --> 01:43:57.560
hear it more. But I hear
the f bond pretty regular in public.

1573
01:43:57.640 --> 01:43:59.720
I really don't think about, like
I have that thing. It's like I'm

1574
01:43:59.720 --> 01:44:02.359
so rarely around kids. They're like, but now a lot of my friends

1575
01:44:02.399 --> 01:44:05.560
have kids, and so if you
know almost my friends are elsewhere, but

1576
01:44:05.680 --> 01:44:08.640
if why you do that. That's
the thing, like I'll be like home

1577
01:44:08.680 --> 01:44:11.960
for Thanksgiving or something and there's like
young kids there and stuff. Yeah,

1578
01:44:12.079 --> 01:44:15.520
fucking you know, but that's the
thing. I'll like, yeah, I'll

1579
01:44:15.560 --> 01:44:17.680
stop a curse with a curse.
But I just don't think it matters,

1580
01:44:18.000 --> 01:44:20.680
you know. And like every parent
I've been around where I've done that,

1581
01:44:20.680 --> 01:44:23.479
they're be like it's fine. They
hear a way worse at home. You

1582
01:44:23.520 --> 01:44:26.159
know, kind of matters if you're
a parent and you've got a ten year

1583
01:44:26.199 --> 01:44:29.159
old, you know what I'm saying
that, I mean, if it's fucking

1584
01:44:29.199 --> 01:44:30.560
shit, I mean, yeah,
you don't want I'm saying fucking slurs or

1585
01:44:30.600 --> 01:44:34.159
whatever like words it actually like matter
but like fucking shit and stuff like yeah

1586
01:44:34.239 --> 01:44:38.000
you do you don't want your kids
saying I get, I know I can't

1587
01:44:38.000 --> 01:44:42.000
really relate to like kids stuff,
but because you know, there's several families

1588
01:44:42.000 --> 01:44:45.359
in my neighborhood with small kids,
and I hear all the time from like

1589
01:44:45.439 --> 01:44:46.840
ten to eleven year olds. Man, when I was that age, and

1590
01:44:46.840 --> 01:44:50.760
I'm not saying we were better or
whatever, it's just different. I mean,

1591
01:44:50.840 --> 01:44:56.079
I I felt uncomfortable saying that word. Until I was like thirty.

1592
01:44:56.359 --> 01:44:59.359
I never cursed around you or mom
for the longest time. Imber. I

1593
01:44:59.399 --> 01:45:02.399
had a friend back when we lived
in an Exa and he would just I

1594
01:45:02.439 --> 01:45:06.279
think you know who I'm talking about. Uh, he would just fuck use

1595
01:45:06.560 --> 01:45:10.760
my fucking house. But and like
in front of his dad, like at

1596
01:45:10.800 --> 01:45:13.039
the dinner table, and I was
just like, oh my god. Remember

1597
01:45:13.119 --> 01:45:15.159
his brother had posters all over all
the walls of like just you know,

1598
01:45:15.239 --> 01:45:17.560
centerfolds and you know, just straight
up like ah, here's my breast of

1599
01:45:17.640 --> 01:45:19.960
vagina. And it's like, oh
my god, I can't believe, like

1600
01:45:20.119 --> 01:45:24.199
he's allowed to have this and they
can curse and like that. That was

1601
01:45:24.319 --> 01:45:29.039
shocking back then. Well, that
was an unusual family. Yes, yes,

1602
01:45:29.119 --> 01:45:31.399
I know exactly what you mean.
Oh yes, yeah, I think

1603
01:45:31.399 --> 01:45:33.119
you had to fire one of them. I did. I had to fire

1604
01:45:33.159 --> 01:45:36.439
one of them for stealing. Yeah, I'm the one who saw it.

1605
01:45:36.920 --> 01:45:41.720
M Yeah. That was not your
typical family. No, no, but

1606
01:45:41.840 --> 01:45:43.960
I mean it was you know,
back in the day, it was weird

1607
01:45:44.000 --> 01:45:46.760
to see people curse around their their
parents. I never really Yeah, I

1608
01:45:46.840 --> 01:45:51.640
never cursed around you. I never
cursed around you. That's true. It's

1609
01:45:51.840 --> 01:45:56.840
you were always the one too that
like you would see Ember you suphole fiction

1610
01:45:57.039 --> 01:46:01.000
and hated it. He told me
that, like, yeah, you're not

1611
01:46:01.159 --> 01:46:04.319
seeing that movie until you're thirty five. You know. It's interesting. It's

1612
01:46:04.319 --> 01:46:08.479
like if to anyone who knows us
or follows us now and sees the relationship

1613
01:46:08.560 --> 01:46:13.119
and we're just talking about it's going
on, it's the fucking space station calling

1614
01:46:13.159 --> 01:46:17.279
you. That's not me. What's
in your pocket? Lit up? It

1615
01:46:17.399 --> 01:46:20.039
did? I thought the answer,
right, I don't know my cigarettes lit

1616
01:46:20.159 --> 01:46:26.119
up? Well, I mean that's
the point, right, ah Um,

1617
01:46:26.199 --> 01:46:28.960
I think anyone who sees us,
now, what are you doing? I'm

1618
01:46:29.000 --> 01:46:31.359
looking for my phone? Now,
you got me wondering. That's right there.

1619
01:46:31.800 --> 01:46:33.760
By the way, my Space watch
tells me where my phone is?

1620
01:46:33.920 --> 01:46:36.439
My Space It's it's really handy,
right, Oh, it's great. I

1621
01:46:36.520 --> 01:46:39.279
do that all the time. It's
like, oh, where's where's my name?

1622
01:46:40.119 --> 01:46:41.600
There? It is? Yeah,
I've only had to do it once

1623
01:46:41.680 --> 01:46:43.840
or twice, but it's pretty great. It's extremely handy. I do it

1624
01:46:44.000 --> 01:46:45.359
like six times a day. I'm
a kid. I'm alost always had my

1625
01:46:45.399 --> 01:46:47.920
phone on me. Well, it's
like I always feel here's the thing.

1626
01:46:47.960 --> 01:46:50.439
I want to get your thoughts on
this. We're talking about Backla earlier.

1627
01:46:50.960 --> 01:46:55.439
Um, yeah, it's it's just
a kind of a bit. I'm not

1628
01:46:55.560 --> 01:46:58.760
it's not actually like a point of
argument or anything. But like, so

1629
01:46:58.920 --> 01:47:01.199
he's got a seven year old kid, and it came up on a podcast

1630
01:47:01.319 --> 01:47:04.840
not too long ago. We're talking
about movies and like what his kid watches

1631
01:47:04.920 --> 01:47:10.079
and what he's afraid of and can't
watch or whatever, and Jaws came up,

1632
01:47:10.880 --> 01:47:13.880
and Backlar was like, are you
fucking nuts? I'm not gonna let

1633
01:47:13.920 --> 01:47:16.880
my kids see Jaws. And I
was probably six or seven when I saw

1634
01:47:16.960 --> 01:47:19.399
Jass. I mean I was seven
when I said Terminator, Like, I'm

1635
01:47:19.640 --> 01:47:23.439
very much in the like, yeah, if I agree, though, you

1636
01:47:23.520 --> 01:47:27.840
agree with Backlar really because you always
work like mom, let me just unfettered

1637
01:47:27.840 --> 01:47:30.760
access to everything. You were always
the one that was more like you can't

1638
01:47:30.760 --> 01:47:32.119
watch this or whatever, So like, what is the is it more I

1639
01:47:32.159 --> 01:47:36.960
would just get scared. No,
that's either sexual stuff or violence. Yeah,

1640
01:47:38.279 --> 01:47:41.640
yeah, like Jaws is just too
scary. Well, there was there's

1641
01:47:41.720 --> 01:47:44.319
boobs at the beginning, there was
nude scene at the beginning, and just

1642
01:47:45.039 --> 01:47:46.840
the violence. I mean you don't
want a kid being terrified of going in

1643
01:47:46.920 --> 01:47:49.439
the water. But I mean,
isn't that part of being a kid.

1644
01:47:49.520 --> 01:47:53.079
It's just like, oh, I
think scar getting eaten by a shark,

1645
01:47:55.239 --> 01:47:58.239
getting eaten by a shark, But
like, like that part of the fun

1646
01:47:58.279 --> 01:48:00.479
of being a kid is like,
oh my god, I saw this thing

1647
01:48:00.479 --> 01:48:01.680
and scared the shit out of me, and like those memories of like that's

1648
01:48:01.720 --> 01:48:05.800
why they make roller coasters. I
love those two. But I mean,

1649
01:48:05.960 --> 01:48:10.760
sure, if a kid is legitimately
like terrified of scary movies or death or

1650
01:48:10.800 --> 01:48:12.840
anything like that, then like,
yeah, I stay away from that stuff.

1651
01:48:12.880 --> 01:48:15.439
But like I remember as a kid, I just like would see Jaws

1652
01:48:15.520 --> 01:48:18.159
and obsess about it or Terminator,
and like, I just don't see anything

1653
01:48:18.159 --> 01:48:21.359
inherently wrong with that if you're into
it, you know, like I knew

1654
01:48:21.399 --> 01:48:25.840
it was fake all the time.
But I mean to a different kid,

1655
01:48:25.880 --> 01:48:29.920
it might create a whole new set
of issues. I'm not saying every parent,

1656
01:48:30.079 --> 01:48:31.880
hey, sit your kid down and
show them Jaws. I'm saying,

1657
01:48:31.960 --> 01:48:35.119
like it shouldn't be across the board, just like no kids should see Jaws.

1658
01:48:35.199 --> 01:48:40.359
You know, that's why there's ratings. Sure, sure, I had

1659
01:48:40.399 --> 01:48:43.079
a big thing with the book it
or the movie. It was the book,

1660
01:48:43.239 --> 01:48:46.119
wasn't it? Well, you found
out in fifth grade that I was

1661
01:48:46.239 --> 01:48:49.359
reading it, and you were adamant
that. I know, Well, the

1662
01:48:49.439 --> 01:48:54.359
only thing was because I had read
it and I could think about it was

1663
01:48:54.439 --> 01:48:58.439
that group sex scene where all the
young kids had sex with each other's Jesus,

1664
01:48:58.560 --> 01:49:00.800
I don't think I got that far. You never finished it, nobodies.

1665
01:49:00.840 --> 01:49:03.520
You were like, you cannot read
that. Yeah, like all these

1666
01:49:03.560 --> 01:49:08.640
fourteen year old kids basically had a
gang bang. What the fuck? Yeah

1667
01:49:09.039 --> 01:49:13.680
in the book, Yeah, Jesus, And I wasn't comfortable with you reading

1668
01:49:13.720 --> 01:49:17.920
that. I mean, okay,
that I get that sounds pretty severe.

1669
01:49:18.239 --> 01:49:24.279
I'm not sure you're emotionally ready for
it. Now that's specific circumstances. No,

1670
01:49:24.800 --> 01:49:28.640
I don't want that at all.
But no, that that sounds that's

1671
01:49:28.840 --> 01:49:30.439
kind of beyond the pail. But
like I don't know, future robots coming

1672
01:49:30.439 --> 01:49:33.399
back to kill people, or like, you know, a shark is scary

1673
01:49:33.439 --> 01:49:39.159
and eight people like I don't know, Like I loved that ship, and

1674
01:49:39.239 --> 01:49:44.039
so maybe I just feel like I
cut off obviously. I mean, I

1675
01:49:44.159 --> 01:49:46.760
just think seven's way too young for
that stuff. I mean, there's enough

1676
01:49:47.039 --> 01:49:54.239
real stuff in life to be scared
about. But you don't want to put

1677
01:49:54.279 --> 01:49:56.960
all those thoughts in a young kid's
brain. Let them be happy with their

1678
01:49:57.000 --> 01:50:01.159
thoughts of Mickey Mouse and Donna Tello. They'll figure out how much life sucks

1679
01:50:01.279 --> 01:50:06.239
later. I didn't think life stuck
because I saw Jaws, And now they'll

1680
01:50:06.279 --> 01:50:12.000
figure there's plenty of real stuff to
be scared about, like sharks. Well

1681
01:50:12.079 --> 01:50:16.199
it did alter American's behavior on the
beaches. Oh yeah, a lot of

1682
01:50:16.239 --> 01:50:19.760
people were scared to swim in the
ocean. I don't think about it.

1683
01:50:19.880 --> 01:50:23.640
I mean I think about Jaws a
lot. Yeah, I mean, like

1684
01:50:23.760 --> 01:50:26.199
the rare occasion when I'm in the
ocean, I'm like, what the fuck

1685
01:50:26.319 --> 01:50:29.439
is down here? You know,
I mean it's a Jurassic Park. I

1686
01:50:29.479 --> 01:50:35.359
won't go into the woods, you
know, go around trees. I went

1687
01:50:35.439 --> 01:50:40.479
in there hoping to find Laura Dirt. She's hanging out in the woods.

1688
01:50:40.600 --> 01:50:44.439
Yeah, she's back there, right
back there, looking at turds. What

1689
01:50:44.680 --> 01:50:50.880
she does? Hey, you like
turds, Laura? Ever? Hey you

1690
01:50:51.079 --> 01:50:59.000
like turns? Laura? Check me
out. Oh there's your t shirt there

1691
01:50:59.119 --> 01:51:05.479
you go? Oh, I mean
there's there's And I'm very anti censorship but

1692
01:51:06.520 --> 01:51:10.680
you don't want everything out in the
open for your four or five year old

1693
01:51:10.760 --> 01:51:15.840
kid to see. Yeah, there's
no religious basis for that. For me,

1694
01:51:15.000 --> 01:51:18.600
it's just I honestly think if I
had kids, which I have no

1695
01:51:18.760 --> 01:51:28.640
intentions of h I think my biggest
thing that I would fixate on is I

1696
01:51:28.760 --> 01:51:31.000
don't want them to have a fucking
iPad. I don't want them to fall

1697
01:51:31.079 --> 01:51:34.920
into a fucking YouTube algorithm and just
sit there like looking into I don't want

1698
01:51:34.920 --> 01:51:38.520
them to have a TikTok account.
I don't want them to fucking like any

1699
01:51:38.600 --> 01:51:42.039
of that ship where they're just the
attention span is going to get nukes.

1700
01:51:42.079 --> 01:51:44.479
And I say that as someone who
grew up. You know, I got

1701
01:51:44.479 --> 01:51:45.880
the Internet when I was twelve,
not as a small child, but like

1702
01:51:45.920 --> 01:51:48.640
I played video games my entire life. My attention span is not great.

1703
01:51:49.199 --> 01:51:54.520
But like I just feel like it
is like nuclear levels of damaging. That's

1704
01:51:54.560 --> 01:51:57.079
all I'm going to get worse exactly, And I think that is the thing

1705
01:51:57.239 --> 01:52:00.520
if I had a kid, more
than any violence, new to the or

1706
01:52:00.560 --> 01:52:02.239
anything like that, I think I
would be like, you're not seeing a

1707
01:52:02.399 --> 01:52:04.680
fu you were not gonna have an
iPhone, you were not gonna have a

1708
01:52:04.760 --> 01:52:10.399
tablet for a long time, and
we were going to talk about healthy usage

1709
01:52:10.399 --> 01:52:12.920
of this stuff. We're gonna set
the screen time type of stuff. Video

1710
01:52:12.960 --> 01:52:15.239
games. Sure, I'm fine with
that. Obviously, it's different now with

1711
01:52:15.319 --> 01:52:18.319
online games and stuff. But what
you don't realize is it's tough to combat

1712
01:52:18.399 --> 01:52:23.479
that when all their friends have.
That's exactly because I have so many friends

1713
01:52:23.560 --> 01:52:27.239
who are very cognizant of that stuff
and are like, I don't want my

1714
01:52:27.359 --> 01:52:30.000
kid to have this or that.
But then when it's like they go to

1715
01:52:30.079 --> 01:52:32.000
school and at recess, the other
kids are like, Oh, check out

1716
01:52:32.039 --> 01:52:34.039
this thing I saw on this and
so why not I get this? Dad?

1717
01:52:34.159 --> 01:52:36.760
Like, there's just a million reasons
I think I wouldn't be able to

1718
01:52:36.800 --> 01:52:40.960
handle having kids, And like,
I just I would not handle that well,

1719
01:52:40.960 --> 01:52:43.439
I don't think. I mean,
honestly, we've had this discussion many

1720
01:52:43.520 --> 01:52:47.199
times, but I just think you'd
be miserable. Yeah, yeah, there's

1721
01:52:47.199 --> 01:52:51.520
just no way You've done whatever you
wanted whenever you wanted your entire adult life

1722
01:52:53.039 --> 01:52:57.319
and to all of a sudden,
because I still long think you realize how

1723
01:52:57.439 --> 01:53:00.680
much having a kid I get,
it puts a clamp on that I talked

1724
01:53:00.720 --> 01:53:03.439
to my friends, but i'd like, I'd say the majority of my friends

1725
01:53:03.439 --> 01:53:09.800
at this point have kids between the
age of like baby and eight. Yeah,

1726
01:53:10.079 --> 01:53:12.600
you know. And it's like,
so I've definitely talked to all my

1727
01:53:12.680 --> 01:53:15.199
friends about it, and I'm aware, I know there's no way I can

1728
01:53:15.279 --> 01:53:17.439
really know since I don't have them, but like, look, I know

1729
01:53:17.720 --> 01:53:20.600
certain friends that like used to be
very available and used to be you know,

1730
01:53:20.840 --> 01:53:23.880
easy to get a hold up or
hang out with, and now it's

1731
01:53:23.920 --> 01:53:28.399
just like, oh, bully.
I realized that as I in my early

1732
01:53:28.439 --> 01:53:33.520
adulthood because you know, when I
was eighteen nineteen, I could make one

1733
01:53:33.600 --> 01:53:38.720
phone call and have a poker game
with eight guys in an hour. Yeah

1734
01:53:38.880 --> 01:53:43.199
you know. Yeah, and when
you're in your probably about well, once

1735
01:53:43.239 --> 01:53:46.439
you start having kids and he getting
married, you have to plan it like

1736
01:53:46.600 --> 01:53:51.800
two months ahead of time. Really, yeah, I prosy get permission from

1737
01:53:51.840 --> 01:53:56.439
those spouses, They got clear of
those schedules. It's just it's not good

1738
01:53:56.520 --> 01:53:58.640
or bad as this way it is. Yeah, yeah, And I don't

1739
01:53:58.720 --> 01:54:01.000
like but granting me my friend who
have had kids and our arn't is available.

1740
01:54:01.079 --> 01:54:04.520
But like I had a friend recently
I asked a question I was like,

1741
01:54:05.159 --> 01:54:08.840
Hey, do you want to do
this thing the summer that we've we've

1742
01:54:08.920 --> 01:54:13.399
usually done and he was like,
he's about to have a kid, and

1743
01:54:13.560 --> 01:54:15.439
he's like, well, you know, we're trying to We're thinking, you

1744
01:54:15.520 --> 01:54:19.600
know, the kids do soon as
this recording and he's like, oh yeah.

1745
01:54:20.279 --> 01:54:24.000
I think I was talking to my
spouse about like maybe in August we

1746
01:54:24.039 --> 01:54:27.600
could each do a thing where we
each have a week where we take the

1747
01:54:27.680 --> 01:54:29.800
kid and the other one gets to
do whatever they want. It's like you

1748
01:54:29.920 --> 01:54:34.279
have to plan a week where you
can do what you want four months in

1749
01:54:34.359 --> 01:54:39.279
advance. Yeah, Like that's fucking
like I literally just you're right, Like

1750
01:54:39.359 --> 01:54:41.600
I know, I'm I don't spoils
the word, but like I am so

1751
01:54:41.760 --> 01:54:45.880
accustomed to like only doing what I
want all the time. Yeah, you

1752
01:54:45.920 --> 01:54:48.600
would not react, will It's it's
in a way that I think that it's

1753
01:54:48.600 --> 01:54:51.680
similar to like you in which like
you have very much gotten used to like

1754
01:54:53.199 --> 01:54:57.439
your routine and your way of living, and when you are something encroaches on

1755
01:54:57.560 --> 01:55:00.560
that, it's just like what the
fuck and you don't necessarily handle it well.

1756
01:55:00.079 --> 01:55:03.359
I don't handle it well. I
don't like lash out or go crazy

1757
01:55:03.439 --> 01:55:06.159
or anything, but like I just
it doesn't compute when I don't get to

1758
01:55:06.239 --> 01:55:10.720
do something I want to do right. You know, I don't know if

1759
01:55:10.720 --> 01:55:13.159
that's a good thing or a bad
thing, but like it's the kids do

1760
01:55:13.319 --> 01:55:17.279
not seem like to work with that. I do feel like you made the

1761
01:55:17.359 --> 01:55:25.439
right decision. Yeah, yeah,
yeah, I mean I used to.

1762
01:55:25.439 --> 01:55:28.239
I used to think that it was
definitely gonna happen because, like I don't

1763
01:55:28.239 --> 01:55:30.359
know, I think you and I, for all they know, complicated it

1764
01:55:30.479 --> 01:55:35.359
is or unusual or whatever our relationship
is always so it meant so much to

1765
01:55:35.479 --> 01:55:39.439
me, and I think about all
the great times growing up and as adults

1766
01:55:39.479 --> 01:55:42.760
and everything, and I always grew
up just assuming like, oh man,

1767
01:55:42.760 --> 01:55:45.119
it's gonna be so fun. It's
gonna be so great to have that with

1768
01:55:45.319 --> 01:55:46.680
my kid, you know, like
that. And then, don't get me

1769
01:55:46.760 --> 01:55:51.520
wrong, I mean great things about
being apparent, but in terms of lifestyle,

1770
01:55:51.640 --> 01:55:57.520
it's it's up huge shift. Yeah
yeah, yeah. I never really

1771
01:55:57.560 --> 01:56:00.880
considered it could be different until I
met Bunk and she was saying like,

1772
01:56:00.960 --> 01:56:03.520
hey, head's up. If you
want to have kids, I'm not your

1773
01:56:03.560 --> 01:56:06.960
girl, And I was like,
well, I know for a fact I

1774
01:56:08.119 --> 01:56:11.720
love you, but I don't know
how I feel about kids, So let

1775
01:56:11.800 --> 01:56:14.439
me go with the sure thing and
I will agree, like I have no

1776
01:56:14.520 --> 01:56:17.079
interest in kids. Let's get together
here, um, And as time's gone

1777
01:56:17.079 --> 01:56:20.760
on and our lives have become the
way they have been, like, it's

1778
01:56:20.800 --> 01:56:24.720
just not compatible. Yeah, but
kids, And you said that to her.

1779
01:56:24.760 --> 01:56:28.399
Then you went in the bathroom and
shot the toilet lid. I said,

1780
01:56:28.680 --> 01:56:31.520
this is the new way, and
got a glass of wine all the

1781
01:56:31.560 --> 01:56:36.840
way to the bathroom. Yes,
this is the day. I want to

1782
01:56:36.880 --> 01:56:44.479
give you credit on air on air
air. Yeah, oh, you've really

1783
01:56:44.479 --> 01:56:47.119
improved your driving. I'll like that. Dan and I went out to eat

1784
01:56:47.119 --> 01:56:53.600
tonight and he actually drove, and
uh, I've been I've been with him

1785
01:56:53.640 --> 01:56:59.039
at his worst driving. What was
the worst Minnesota? Yeah, you're you

1786
01:56:59.119 --> 01:57:01.479
were terrifying. I mean, I'm
not even trying to be funny. Sure,

1787
01:57:02.439 --> 01:57:06.159
being a pastor in a car you
were driving was literally terrifying. Well

1788
01:57:06.680 --> 01:57:10.319
in what way? Let the folks
I know what you mean. But it's

1789
01:57:10.359 --> 01:57:14.720
not like you make it sound like
I'm just like fucking like cleaning. I'm

1790
01:57:14.760 --> 01:57:17.600
not that. Back when you were
trying to be a normal adult, how

1791
01:57:17.640 --> 01:57:23.439
you weren't an accent every day you're
you were a really really bad driver,

1792
01:57:23.800 --> 01:57:27.680
and what we describe the way I
was a bad driver. Oh, there's

1793
01:57:27.720 --> 01:57:32.399
so many things, very hrky jerky. I noticed your foot was always always

1794
01:57:32.760 --> 01:57:36.000
it was always between the break and
the accelerator. It's an anxiety thing.

1795
01:57:36.039 --> 01:57:40.359
It's just like I just can't like
I know you're supposed to just put the

1796
01:57:40.399 --> 01:57:42.600
foot down and keep it there,
but like with me, it's like,

1797
01:57:42.680 --> 01:57:45.279
oh, I just gonna be ready
to breaking case any day. Well what

1798
01:57:45.279 --> 01:57:46.119
am I going to fascinating? Am
I going to it? Like? It's

1799
01:57:46.159 --> 01:57:49.479
just it's a constant, like you
can't settle down. Jerky jerky is the

1800
01:57:49.640 --> 01:57:55.239
phrase I always think of. Um
A lot of a lot of excessive breaking

1801
01:57:55.399 --> 01:58:00.079
and a lot of unnecessary acceleration.
You still do that. You're not in

1802
01:58:00.159 --> 01:58:02.640
the way of like I've never been
like a speed guy. No no,

1803
01:58:02.760 --> 01:58:06.399
no, like instead of easy,
like you're to stop light or stop sign

1804
01:58:06.880 --> 01:58:13.319
instead of easing into going forward,
it's sudden. Yeah, that's the one

1805
01:58:14.079 --> 01:58:17.920
thing I've seen from you. Still
it's held back, but just an overall

1806
01:58:18.560 --> 01:58:25.800
panicky, nervous I think the herky
jerky stuff and the panic when you like

1807
01:58:25.960 --> 01:58:30.399
highway stuff, merging I can feel
it in you, or I used to

1808
01:58:30.439 --> 01:58:33.880
be able to feel it in you, just this overwriting sense of oh oh

1809
01:58:34.000 --> 01:58:36.279
yeah, yeah yeah, and my
heart's beating through my chest. My vision

1810
01:58:36.359 --> 01:58:42.199
is getting like tunnel vision. Yeah
yeah, And I get that way.

1811
01:58:42.279 --> 01:58:45.800
Sometimes I'm totally fine if I know
where I'm going. Yeah. But here's

1812
01:58:45.800 --> 01:58:49.880
the thing. You don't have anxiety
the way I do. Everyone has their

1813
01:58:49.880 --> 01:58:54.520
own anxieties and stuff like that.
I have just straight up anxiety disorders,

1814
01:58:54.600 --> 01:58:57.479
like pretty severely. Like that's a
very different thing. Like I think a

1815
01:58:57.479 --> 01:59:01.399
lot of people who don't have anxiety
describe the situations where they got anxious or

1816
01:59:01.439 --> 01:59:03.319
if I don't know where I'm going
or whatever. But it's like that is

1817
01:59:03.399 --> 01:59:09.640
very different than just like unexplained,
irrational severe anxiety, which is what I've

1818
01:59:09.680 --> 01:59:12.159
dealt with. You know. It's
like it's not like, oh, I'm

1819
01:59:12.199 --> 01:59:14.720
in a situation I should be anxious. I got anxious. Like no,

1820
01:59:14.880 --> 01:59:16.640
I'm merging on the highway and everything's
fine, and for some reason, my

1821
01:59:16.760 --> 01:59:19.560
fucking body's freaking the fuck out.
You know, I mean you say that,

1822
01:59:19.720 --> 01:59:26.159
But the way I reacted to Fenway
was not rational. Yeah, yeah,

1823
01:59:26.880 --> 01:59:29.399
it wasn't. No, No,
yeah, but I also don't know

1824
01:59:29.439 --> 01:59:35.199
if you have anxiety necessarily, I
mean fear of I have a major,

1825
01:59:35.680 --> 01:59:43.239
major thing about avoiding confrontation. Yeah, I will do anything to avoid a

1826
01:59:43.319 --> 01:59:46.520
confrontation. And there was no good
threat of confrontation in that thing. But

1827
01:59:46.920 --> 01:59:50.720
the fact that I knew we were
standing there and we were indecisive and people

1828
01:59:50.760 --> 01:59:55.520
were trying to watch the game,
that just boiled up in me. And

1829
01:59:56.239 --> 01:59:59.640
it was a combination of that and
looking stupid. We alluded to it.

1830
01:59:59.680 --> 02:00:01.279
For this is where it's like people
were in our seat. I went in

1831
02:00:01.319 --> 02:00:02.960
there to be like, hey,
you're in our seat. The game had

1832
02:00:02.960 --> 02:00:05.279
already started, the gaming de started, and he was just standing there like,

1833
02:00:05.600 --> 02:00:09.520
and it like it's literally thirty or
forty minutes afterwards, you were like,

1834
02:00:09.640 --> 02:00:12.119
I feel like my blood pressure is
through the roof. Oh my god,

1835
02:00:12.119 --> 02:00:14.279
I'm just now starting to come down. I'm just not like you were,

1836
02:00:14.359 --> 02:00:15.399
like just because we were like for
we were, it took them a

1837
02:00:15.439 --> 02:00:19.600
while to like move over, and
it just you were having like an internal

1838
02:00:19.640 --> 02:00:25.199
crisis. Yeah, it was.
Yeah, I was dying inside. And

1839
02:00:25.319 --> 02:00:28.600
you notice I tried to just sit
down on the wrong seats just oh,

1840
02:00:28.760 --> 02:00:30.760
I know, and I was like
I was. I was asking. I

1841
02:00:30.880 --> 02:00:31.520
was like, hey, no,
no, we're seven and eight. Go

1842
02:00:31.520 --> 02:00:35.479
over to seven and eight, and
you're just you know, yeah, I

1843
02:00:35.520 --> 02:00:39.199
don't like being like that. No, nobody likes when they feel like that.

1844
02:00:39.399 --> 02:00:51.479
No, but anywhou fun sound the
passage of time aging, it's ridiculous.

1845
02:00:53.159 --> 02:00:59.560
Yeah, I feel like I can
distinctly remember I just started a new

1846
02:00:59.640 --> 02:01:01.840
job when I turned forty. I'd
been there like a week or two,

1847
02:01:02.520 --> 02:01:08.359
and there was yellow pages, Fiasca, where are you marriage kids? Wives?

1848
02:01:08.520 --> 02:01:14.680
At my age, I was out
of a horrible divorce. You're out

1849
02:01:14.720 --> 02:01:18.119
of wife two divorce. I was
in legal hell with her. Right kids

1850
02:01:18.159 --> 02:01:23.640
were little too, My two little
ones were little. Yeah. Just I

1851
02:01:23.800 --> 02:01:29.800
wasn't making jack ship for money.
I was fighting constantly with the X that

1852
02:01:30.000 --> 02:01:34.119
was. That was a horrible period
of my life. Um but anyway,

1853
02:01:34.159 --> 02:01:38.159
so when I turned forty, I
just started this job and I remember the

1854
02:01:38.239 --> 02:01:42.199
boss and now I remember exactly what
she said. She said. She said,

1855
02:01:42.199 --> 02:01:45.159
we have a birthday to day.
It's Paul's birthday, she said.

1856
02:01:45.159 --> 02:01:48.079
And I'm not gonna say old you
are. It's a big one, and

1857
02:01:48.439 --> 02:01:55.920
you know, you know, typical
workplace stuff. My point is that twenty

1858
02:01:56.039 --> 02:02:01.720
years elapsing feels like three years really, and that you'll find that as you

1859
02:02:01.760 --> 02:02:08.520
get older, ten years feels like
one. It's just incredible. It's like

1860
02:02:08.600 --> 02:02:11.600
New Orleans, you know, it
doesn't seem that long ago. You and

1861
02:02:11.680 --> 02:02:14.800
I went. We went to New
Orleans on my fiftieth birthday, and it

1862
02:02:14.880 --> 02:02:17.000
doesn't seem that long ago. No, there's ten years, like almost to

1863
02:02:17.039 --> 02:02:21.279
the day. And I think now
I am closer to seventy than I was

1864
02:02:21.760 --> 02:02:27.079
to the New Orleans trip. Yeah, and that's crazy to me and scary

1865
02:02:27.159 --> 02:02:30.800
as hell. Yeah, Now,
do you honest questions? So that is

1866
02:02:30.840 --> 02:02:33.159
the case of everyone, and I
have felt it. Sure, my dad

1867
02:02:33.239 --> 02:02:38.560
warned me about it. Sure,
and it's true. But do you think

1868
02:02:38.920 --> 02:02:44.680
any of it is exacerbated by your
lifestyle? Of it being people lived in

1869
02:02:44.720 --> 02:02:47.159
the same place. You don't leave
the house, you do the same things

1870
02:02:47.159 --> 02:02:50.760
everybody, You don't think that's no
one. I'll tell you why, because

1871
02:02:50.760 --> 02:02:56.000
almost everybody I know is my age
or older. Sure, and everyone feels

1872
02:02:56.039 --> 02:02:58.279
the same way anyway. I feel
the same way too, even at like

1873
02:02:58.399 --> 02:03:00.840
forty, and it gets a lot
worse. Yeah, Well, I mean

1874
02:03:00.760 --> 02:03:04.239
the analogy the toilet paper one like
I think that there's a lot. I

1875
02:03:04.279 --> 02:03:06.920
think it's right. If you want
to tell it, well, I use

1876
02:03:08.159 --> 02:03:11.640
cartons of cigarettes, but go ahead. Well I remember you saying once that

1877
02:03:12.800 --> 02:03:15.439
life is like a roll of toilet
paper, where it's like as it gets

1878
02:03:15.520 --> 02:03:18.479
further along or closer to the end, it just goes faster and faster.

1879
02:03:18.680 --> 02:03:20.560
You know. It's like I have
thought of that a lot. Yeah,

1880
02:03:20.600 --> 02:03:24.239
it's true. Like if you're a
smoker and you get a carton cigarettes,

1881
02:03:24.279 --> 02:03:27.880
you're like, oh man, I'm
good for ever, and the next thing

1882
02:03:27.880 --> 02:03:30.920
you know, it's like a funk, I gotta get cigarettes. But the

1883
02:03:30.039 --> 02:03:34.079
thing is, and you know you
and I know this firsthand from losing my

1884
02:03:34.199 --> 02:03:41.680
nephew and your cousin last year at
forty suddenly to cancer. It's like,

1885
02:03:42.000 --> 02:03:44.800
and there's no promises. Yeah,
time goes fast, and yeah, I'll

1886
02:03:44.800 --> 02:03:47.039
be eighty two fast. There's no
chance I'll be sick. There's no guarantee

1887
02:03:47.039 --> 02:03:51.960
you'll be sixty one. There's no
guarantee you'll be thirty nine. I've known

1888
02:03:53.439 --> 02:03:57.680
a lot of people in my lifetime. They've gotten car wrecks and just they

1889
02:03:57.720 --> 02:04:00.319
were just going to work or whatever, and fuck, they never make it.

1890
02:04:00.399 --> 02:04:03.439
There it's yeah, there's no guarantees. Yeah, I don't want to

1891
02:04:03.479 --> 02:04:06.279
get like you know, and I
and I say shit like that, and

1892
02:04:06.399 --> 02:04:11.079
I think to myself that I should
be experiencing more and living more, but

1893
02:04:11.199 --> 02:04:14.359
I don't do it now. You
said that when Grandpa passed too, that

1894
02:04:14.560 --> 02:04:15.880
like, oh, this is gonna
be my impetus for like I'm gonna start

1895
02:04:15.920 --> 02:04:18.119
going out and you know, yeah, I'm living my life will I can

1896
02:04:18.159 --> 02:04:20.119
still get up and move around and
stuff like that. That I mean,

1897
02:04:20.159 --> 02:04:25.159
I saw a man who was who
enjoyed life more than anybody ever knew,

1898
02:04:26.159 --> 02:04:29.680
and who the last three years of
his life due to dementia were just awful.

1899
02:04:30.640 --> 02:04:33.239
And I saw him deteriorate before my
very eyes, And yeah, I

1900
02:04:33.279 --> 02:04:36.239
thought that was awakening. I thought
my APPENDECTI was a wake up call.

1901
02:04:36.560 --> 02:04:40.640
Yeah, did I see appen ying
me? He said, all right,

1902
02:04:40.760 --> 02:04:45.520
appendect to me was a wake up
call. I thought losing you know,

1903
02:04:45.840 --> 02:04:51.520
my nephew was awakening. But I
and I used this U story in my

1904
02:04:51.600 --> 02:04:55.840
head and it's so stupid, but
it's just the way I rationalized stuff.

1905
02:04:56.279 --> 02:04:59.119
I'm like, I mean, I
saw the grand Canny when I was a

1906
02:04:59.199 --> 02:05:01.840
kid. But I often think I
use this just as an example. I

1907
02:05:01.920 --> 02:05:05.199
was like, you know, I, while I still can, while I'm

1908
02:05:05.199 --> 02:05:10.039
physically able, I should go see
the Grand Canyon. And then the other

1909
02:05:10.119 --> 02:05:15.520
side of my brain goes, well, then you'll see the Grand Canyon,

1910
02:05:15.640 --> 02:05:16.840
and when you die, you'll just
be a guy, a dead guy who's

1911
02:05:16.880 --> 02:05:21.039
all the Grand Canyon? Did it
really matter? That's just how my brain

1912
02:05:21.119 --> 02:05:26.760
works. I can't relate to that. I know you live life very differently

1913
02:05:26.800 --> 02:05:29.399
than I do. Well, I
relate to like the whole thing, like

1914
02:05:29.479 --> 02:05:30.680
I think everyone knows, you know, life's and I guaranteed and all that

1915
02:05:31.079 --> 02:05:33.600
it's but you know, you think
about like, oh the car crash or

1916
02:05:33.640 --> 02:05:38.760
this could happen like that always just
feels like random. It's just you know,

1917
02:05:39.000 --> 02:05:41.680
bolt of lightning out of nowhere could
kill you, of course, but

1918
02:05:41.920 --> 02:05:46.000
it not to get depressing. But
yeah, you alluded to Matt passing recently,

1919
02:05:46.239 --> 02:05:49.960
and I've talked about it a little
bit before. But he was forty

1920
02:05:50.319 --> 02:05:58.000
and suddenly got some stomach pains pancreatic
cancer, and he from the time he

1921
02:05:58.039 --> 02:06:01.079
got diagnosed to the time he passed
was like a month less than a month,

1922
02:06:01.119 --> 02:06:06.000
than a month less than a month, and that was the most eye

1923
02:06:06.039 --> 02:06:09.800
opening thing for me and something I've
thought about constantly. Sense because he was

1924
02:06:09.840 --> 02:06:12.159
close to your age, that's the
thing. He was two years older than

1925
02:06:12.199 --> 02:06:15.319
me and we were really close growing
up. And that was just the crazy

1926
02:06:15.359 --> 02:06:19.079
things like you think there would always
be like a warning or like oh,

1927
02:06:19.279 --> 02:06:23.399
you know he was sick for a
few years whatever, or you know,

1928
02:06:23.520 --> 02:06:28.720
like I never really considered how immediate
it could be where it's like nope,

1929
02:06:28.840 --> 02:06:30.039
all of a sudden, oh,
what's that stomach pain? And then like

1930
02:06:30.199 --> 02:06:34.119
you're gone. Yeah, it's uh. That was for that to be my

1931
02:06:34.159 --> 02:06:38.960
first experience with that and someone I
was so close with it was, and

1932
02:06:39.079 --> 02:06:42.600
someone that close to my age and
someone those frankly like way more health healthy

1933
02:06:42.640 --> 02:06:45.039
than me. You know, he
was active, he was you know he

1934
02:06:45.279 --> 02:06:49.079
uh man, that was he reminds
me of norm talking about and he was

1935
02:06:49.079 --> 02:06:50.880
trying to be funny, but he
made a good point. It is like,

1936
02:06:51.680 --> 02:06:54.479
you know, you think there's something
wrong, you go to the doctor

1937
02:06:54.520 --> 02:06:57.600
and you get the all clear.
Doctor says, man, you're all good,

1938
02:06:57.680 --> 02:07:00.439
and said you just keep coming back. I'll give you some news.

1939
02:07:00.479 --> 02:07:06.279
It'll shatter your world at some point. Yeah, And that's true. Yeah,

1940
02:07:06.600 --> 02:07:13.720
it's it's uh, it's it's uh. Well, I'll never forget when

1941
02:07:13.720 --> 02:07:18.640
I figured this shit out. My
you know this. But my daughter's grandmother

1942
02:07:18.920 --> 02:07:25.520
on their mother's side just recently passed
at ninety five, and I was doing

1943
02:07:25.560 --> 02:07:29.359
the math. I gotta do it
again. But yeah, she was fifty

1944
02:07:29.439 --> 02:07:32.840
five years old when my nephew Matt
was born and she outlived it. That's

1945
02:07:32.960 --> 02:07:38.479
fucking insane. What the hell that'd
be? Like, I think of a

1946
02:07:38.520 --> 02:07:41.640
five year old child right now,
Yeah, and I would outlive them.

1947
02:07:42.600 --> 02:07:46.119
That's it. That's nuts. It's
so unfair and so random. Yeah,

1948
02:07:46.199 --> 02:07:48.640
And it's like, you know,
I'm I know, I'm not a spring

1949
02:07:48.800 --> 02:07:53.239
chicken at you know, thirty nine, but I have so many plans for

1950
02:07:53.279 --> 02:07:55.560
my life and so many things I'm
excited about, and all these things I

1951
02:07:55.600 --> 02:07:57.439
can't wait for me and be I'm
gonna do this when we're old, and

1952
02:07:57.439 --> 02:08:00.119
we're gonna do these trips and we're
gonna move here and retire here, or

1953
02:08:00.239 --> 02:08:03.079
do this when we're retired, and
like just the idea of like in my

1954
02:08:03.199 --> 02:08:05.279
head that's just like, oh,
of course that's all gonna happen, Like

1955
02:08:05.319 --> 02:08:07.600
that's all, you know. But
then it's like, you know, things

1956
02:08:07.680 --> 02:08:11.279
like the Matt situation everything just are
a stark reminder that, like, you

1957
02:08:11.359 --> 02:08:16.359
can make all the plans in the
world, and look, life can stuff

1958
02:08:16.399 --> 02:08:20.359
you can never ever see coming,
could just totally other plans for you.

1959
02:08:20.640 --> 02:08:22.880
Well, it reminds me of my
favorite quote, and you know this,

1960
02:08:22.079 --> 02:08:26.039
but there's a quote from a John
Lennon song. It says, life is

1961
02:08:26.119 --> 02:08:31.279
what happens while you're busy making other
plans. Sure, and you can map

1962
02:08:31.359 --> 02:08:33.319
out your life, you know in
your head the way you think it's going

1963
02:08:33.399 --> 02:08:37.159
to go. But no matter who
you are, life's gonna throw your curveballs.

1964
02:08:37.600 --> 02:08:41.199
Yeah, and things are gonna happen
you don't expect and you don't see

1965
02:08:41.279 --> 02:08:43.800
coming, and you can't do anything
about it. It's just it's just the

1966
02:08:43.840 --> 02:08:46.560
way it is. Well, and
I think the important thing is to just

1967
02:08:46.640 --> 02:08:50.079
be able to roll with the punches
as much as you can. Like And

1968
02:08:50.439 --> 02:08:54.920
sometimes those punches are like minor and
conveniences sometimes like oh Wow, someone got

1969
02:08:54.960 --> 02:08:56.920
pregnant. Now I gotta have a
kid. And this one's like, oh

1970
02:08:56.359 --> 02:08:58.760
someone's got an illness, someone's got
you know, Oh, I got this

1971
02:08:58.800 --> 02:09:01.399
job where I gotta move to another
state where like that can take so many

1972
02:09:01.439 --> 02:09:05.720
different forms on it's a wide spectrum
of importance, and I think it's just

1973
02:09:05.840 --> 02:09:09.439
important to be able to roll with
whatever punches you can. But of course

1974
02:09:09.479 --> 02:09:11.760
there are some punches that are just
gonna be like knock out blow and you

1975
02:09:11.800 --> 02:09:15.000
can't really do anything about it.
You know. It's like my sister and

1976
02:09:15.079 --> 02:09:18.479
her husband. It wasn't in their
mind that they would outlive one of their

1977
02:09:18.560 --> 02:09:24.920
children. Yeah, you know.
Yeah, it's lives of grab shoots.

1978
02:09:24.960 --> 02:09:31.119
Sometimes it is. But oh,
I see a dipper, a dipper,

1979
02:09:31.760 --> 02:09:37.039
I'm gonna go pee uh and grab. I'll grab one more log. Huh,

1980
02:09:37.119 --> 02:09:39.199
I'm gonna grab another log. What
do you think are we wind?

1981
02:09:39.720 --> 02:09:43.640
Is this the wind up? I
want to sing a song? O sing

1982
02:09:43.720 --> 02:09:46.279
a song. I'll go grab a
log. I don't know where you're going

1983
02:09:46.319 --> 02:09:48.640
with this, but I want to
sing it to you. Then just vamp

1984
02:09:48.680 --> 02:09:50.359
for a little bit, and you
do you know they put a log on

1985
02:09:50.399 --> 02:09:54.119
the fire song? Do you want
to sing it? When I get a

1986
02:09:54.159 --> 02:09:56.960
log, I want to do it
right now. Okay, let's hear it.

1987
02:09:58.239 --> 02:10:03.000
Put another log on the fire.
Cook me up some bacon and some

1988
02:10:03.279 --> 02:10:07.760
beans, go out to the truck
and lift it up, and change the

1989
02:10:07.920 --> 02:10:13.039
tire. Wash my socks and so
my old blue jeans. You start taking

1990
02:10:13.079 --> 02:10:16.640
notes this a lot of things.
Wash my socks and so my old blue

1991
02:10:16.720 --> 02:10:22.640
jeans. So putting another log on
the fire. And then there's another line

1992
02:10:22.640 --> 02:10:26.359
I can't remember, and the end
is and come and tell me why you're

1993
02:10:26.479 --> 02:10:31.039
leaving me. Okay, well I'm
leaving to get a log. I always

1994
02:10:31.079 --> 02:10:37.039
like that song. Do you ever
do you remember I'm a little drunk,

1995
02:10:37.439 --> 02:10:43.720
weird, weird eighteen fourteen. We
took a little trip, you know that

1996
02:10:43.800 --> 02:10:50.000
song the folks? Okay, norm
not that anyone's watching, but thanks for

1997
02:10:50.079 --> 02:10:58.079
listening to our depressing the stories about
life. Um, you will face some

1998
02:10:58.199 --> 02:11:00.680
hardship in life, and you're gonna
have a lot of on the way too.

1999
02:11:01.279 --> 02:11:05.720
I got to ride the waves.
There's a I lean on lyrics a

2000
02:11:05.800 --> 02:11:09.359
lot. There's a song by Jerry
Jeff Walker, which I know none of

2001
02:11:09.399 --> 02:11:13.039
you have heard of. It's called
getting By, and I'm trying to take

2002
02:11:13.079 --> 02:11:22.760
it the line, oh, just
getting by on getting by is my stock

2003
02:11:22.800 --> 02:11:28.039
and trade, living it day to
day, picking up the pieces wherever they

2004
02:11:28.199 --> 02:11:33.640
fall, just letting it roll,
letting the high times carry the low,

2005
02:11:35.560 --> 02:11:39.960
just living my life. Easy come, easy go. I was just sharing

2006
02:11:39.000 --> 02:11:43.720
a song lyric. Yeah, and
I think there's words of wisdom in there.

2007
02:11:43.960 --> 02:11:46.880
Yeah. Well I'm gonna piece,
so tell me what. I don't

2008
02:11:46.960 --> 02:11:50.079
pee in your yard because I've hurt
the home value peeing in my yard.

2009
02:11:50.159 --> 02:11:54.239
I've never had a problem with that. Jesus Christ, you're committing to like

2010
02:11:54.319 --> 02:12:01.000
another two hours. It's one log
that was two things broken in half.

2011
02:12:01.479 --> 02:12:03.760
It was one that became two.
What do you look for, Rigno,

2012
02:12:05.640 --> 02:12:09.760
What does that mean you broke it
in half? It was a log,

2013
02:12:09.359 --> 02:12:13.039
by the way, earlier I saw
it, Dan, do something supermanly.

2014
02:12:13.319 --> 02:12:20.760
What I'm not talking to you?
Why is the bush talking? Where the

2015
02:12:20.840 --> 02:12:28.880
bush? Why is the bush growing? It was a burning bush, not

2016
02:12:28.000 --> 02:12:35.279
a peeing bush. Let the fire
around peeing bush. That's a different Bible.

2017
02:12:35.520 --> 02:12:41.920
Yeah, what was I talking about? I don't know? This is

2018
02:12:41.279 --> 02:12:48.479
this is sliding in the nonsense.
I know your fans hate nonsense. Yeah,

2019
02:12:48.680 --> 02:12:58.000
they have no tolerance, no tolerance
for nonsense. All right, Um,

2020
02:12:58.640 --> 02:13:01.159
I love the music. Questions earlier
on the other thing we did,

2021
02:13:01.640 --> 02:13:05.800
some of those were tough choices.
Yeah, I would love it, if

2022
02:13:05.840 --> 02:13:09.960
you would love it, if you
started doing the Twitter stuffs. That'd be

2023
02:13:09.119 --> 02:13:13.960
fun. I'll consider it. I
doubt it, but I'd love to be

2024
02:13:13.039 --> 02:13:20.600
surprised. I heard a dumb joke
on Twitter tonight. What's that? What's

2025
02:13:20.640 --> 02:13:26.319
that? I don't even know how
to phrase it. Shut up? You're

2026
02:13:26.479 --> 02:13:31.399
going be pee? Shut up?
You should tell the folks. You should

2027
02:13:31.439 --> 02:13:35.840
tell beardy man three thousand there.
But how you made me ship my pants

2028
02:13:35.880 --> 02:13:37.119
in New Orleans? Oh? I've
told that, sorry, numerous times on

2029
02:13:37.279 --> 02:13:41.680
various things. You get a picture
of it. I do have a picture.

2030
02:13:41.680 --> 02:13:48.479
What are you doing there? Ah? I pete, I shipped my

2031
02:13:48.600 --> 02:13:50.960
pants. Let me try to remember
to put up I'm reminding myself to put

2032
02:13:52.039 --> 02:13:54.840
up a picture of him shooting his
pants on a bench right now. I

2033
02:13:54.960 --> 02:13:58.359
shipped my pants in the parking lot
of my high school two years ago.

2034
02:14:00.560 --> 02:14:05.239
True story. Why are you standing
up? I'm thinking about pan? Don't

2035
02:14:05.319 --> 02:14:07.520
you know how I operate? By
now? You can't stand up to think

2036
02:14:07.520 --> 02:14:11.319
about you have to think about stuff? And oh what was it called earlier?

2037
02:14:11.359 --> 02:14:15.880
The preliminary Paul process for taking a
shower? That took literally two hours

2038
02:14:16.079 --> 02:14:20.239
of you hyping yourself up to take
a shower. Cool? Cool, cool?

2039
02:14:20.680 --> 02:14:24.600
Fuck yeah, you're extending it by
making me a laugh. Let's say

2040
02:14:24.600 --> 02:14:30.000
you shoot your pants, so it's
starting. I sold something for like two

2041
02:14:30.039 --> 02:14:37.560
bucks, a couple of gumballs.
I can. I got a piece so

2042
02:14:37.640 --> 02:14:46.000
bad it's affecting my walking. Just
go the folks. The preliminary Paul process.

2043
02:14:46.720 --> 02:14:48.359
Um, it's a fun time.
Do you ever want to do anything

2044
02:14:48.479 --> 02:14:52.840
with old Paul Reichert If he has
to do anything, he has to get

2045
02:14:52.880 --> 02:14:54.960
out of a bed, if you
have to put pants on, if you

2046
02:14:56.000 --> 02:14:58.720
have to take a shower, especially, it's a numerous step process. And

2047
02:14:58.800 --> 02:15:03.399
it's head where he was talking about, like Dan, this is a big

2048
02:15:03.439 --> 02:15:09.640
step in the preliminary Paul process is
I brought my underpants from the bedroom to

2049
02:15:09.880 --> 02:15:13.239
the shower area, and now I
gotta sit here, and now I'm gonna

2050
02:15:13.279 --> 02:15:16.000
go smoke. But he never just
goes and smokes. He talks about smoking

2051
02:15:16.520 --> 02:15:20.680
for upwards of a half hour.
And he it's fun too because he just

2052
02:15:20.800 --> 02:15:26.119
hovers over you. So he'll just
like sometimes you'll be waking up and he'll

2053
02:15:26.159 --> 02:15:30.439
be like going out in the morning
and he will literally just sit. This

2054
02:15:30.520 --> 02:15:33.680
happened in the hotel. You sat
on your bed while I'm laying in bed

2055
02:15:33.760 --> 02:15:35.840
trying to sleep, and just I'm
gonna go smoke. I'm gonna go smoke

2056
02:15:35.840 --> 02:15:39.640
a cigarette. Ye, when smoke
a cigarette, Okay, just go No,

2057
02:15:39.720 --> 02:15:41.239
I'm gonna are you mad at me? It's like, no, just

2058
02:15:41.319 --> 02:15:48.119
go smoke to a cigarette. Smoke
the fucking cigarette. You're you're not a

2059
02:15:48.199 --> 02:15:52.159
big proponent of the just like just
rapping the bandit off and getting stuff done.

2060
02:15:54.039 --> 02:15:56.079
Why I got talking thinking about it
for a while. Do you think

2061
02:15:56.119 --> 02:15:58.880
it helps you? If there was
a hidden camera in my house, you'd

2062
02:16:00.399 --> 02:16:05.439
think I was insane? Think because
I'm really lately doing a lot of talking

2063
02:16:05.439 --> 02:16:09.600
to myself out out, and everything
you heard outout, yeah, yeah,

2064
02:16:09.840 --> 02:16:13.640
And everything you heard in your last
three days with me is stuff that's going

2065
02:16:13.720 --> 02:16:18.800
on in my head or I'm saying
it. I mean the most mundane things

2066
02:16:18.119 --> 02:16:24.760
like okay, I need to smoke
pee and then what's another one? Well,

2067
02:16:24.800 --> 02:16:26.920
I just thought of one, a
very important one. I need to

2068
02:16:26.960 --> 02:16:28.720
tell the folks about that. I
think I'm the only person you've told about.

2069
02:16:30.199 --> 02:16:35.000
Please talk about your nightly routine before
bed. It's about the stove in

2070
02:16:35.040 --> 02:16:43.200
the door. Nope, the thing
that gets graded. Yeah, that makes

2071
02:16:43.200 --> 02:16:46.360
me sound insane go on. I
used to do that with Curb too.

2072
02:16:46.559 --> 02:16:50.600
No, let's start with what you
told me here. It sounds really weird.

2073
02:16:50.000 --> 02:16:54.719
Yeah, it's just a fun little
thing I do. Let the folks

2074
02:16:54.799 --> 02:16:58.719
know. The folks, this has
been an intimate conversation. Let's let's peer

2075
02:16:58.799 --> 02:17:01.920
into this, right, Okay,
Norm, by the way, you have

2076
02:17:03.000 --> 02:17:07.159
to promise me at some point will
do like a two hour this podcast.

2077
02:17:07.239 --> 02:17:11.079
What is this? Fire cast?
Is a firecast? It's a video we're

2078
02:17:11.079 --> 02:17:16.760
putting on YouTube, just talking about
Norm, like a tribute. Oh,

2079
02:17:16.879 --> 02:17:20.239
I think we've done that a lot
in bits and pieces. But too,

2080
02:17:20.600 --> 02:17:22.719
Daddy, you're trying to diverte.
You got to talk about the thing you

2081
02:17:22.760 --> 02:17:26.040
do every night. It makes me
sound clinically insane, it does, But

2082
02:17:26.159 --> 02:17:30.719
it's fine. Tell the folks,
well, it's more of a visual thing.

2083
02:17:31.200 --> 02:17:33.559
Well, I mean you can.
We've got three cameras here, so

2084
02:17:33.399 --> 02:17:37.000
but I have be laying down.
Well, just do your best, and

2085
02:17:37.120 --> 02:17:43.559
in my underwear, do your best. You're delaying this. I am a

2086
02:17:43.680 --> 02:17:48.680
person who when they go to sleep
has to have something on the TV.

2087
02:17:48.920 --> 02:17:52.840
And it's a whole routine. I
haven't even told you about stove door thing.

2088
02:17:52.959 --> 02:18:00.239
Have I stove door. It's fairly
move what's this? It's part of

2089
02:18:00.280 --> 02:18:03.440
my new routine. Okay, and
if you saw it just watching me,

2090
02:18:03.520 --> 02:18:09.440
you clearly think I was insane.
Okay, great, I'm a little OCD

2091
02:18:09.959 --> 02:18:16.559
just a little bit too um.
So I'd like to watch a TV show

2092
02:18:18.040 --> 02:18:20.879
as if not watch, but listen
to a TV show as I fall asleep.

2093
02:18:20.959 --> 02:18:24.719
And and generally I liked um stuff
that I've seen before, so I

2094
02:18:24.799 --> 02:18:28.719
can just hear it and not have
to watch it. And I've literally seen

2095
02:18:28.760 --> 02:18:33.840
every Family Guy like five or six
times, so it's usually Family Guy and

2096
02:18:33.079 --> 02:18:37.520
the if you've ever watched it,
the opening theme has a certain it's a

2097
02:18:37.600 --> 02:18:43.639
song that I know very very well, and I do a little hip show

2098
02:18:43.719 --> 02:18:48.040
the folks. Yeah, you have
be laying down, okay, Uh,

2099
02:18:48.639 --> 02:18:52.200
just rotate your hips to the music. And then at the end you punctuated

2100
02:18:52.840 --> 02:18:54.319
when the song ends, and so
you're doing you're doing like one of these

2101
02:18:54.399 --> 02:19:00.520
guys as a show girl type thing. Okay, all right, then that

2102
02:19:01.920 --> 02:19:05.239
boom in the big finish, but
the thrust yeah yeah yeah. And then

2103
02:19:07.040 --> 02:19:09.040
at the end of it, I
give myself a grade as to how how

2104
02:19:09.159 --> 02:19:13.200
good I did at the little dance
so like, is the last thing you

2105
02:19:13.360 --> 02:19:16.000
think about before sleep every night?
Is like, no, that was an

2106
02:19:16.040 --> 02:19:18.959
eight? Yeah? I get actually
give it a grade? Yeah yeah?

2107
02:19:20.159 --> 02:19:22.959
Is it one to ten? Huh? Is it a one to ten or

2108
02:19:22.040 --> 02:19:26.399
is it like a plus B?
It's usual like a six because it's it's

2109
02:19:26.479 --> 02:19:31.120
hard. Have you ever hit a
ten? No? I can't even imagine

2110
02:19:31.239 --> 02:19:33.879
cheating those kind of standards. I
mean, everyone's gonna have dreams. I

2111
02:19:35.000 --> 02:19:37.600
do have another thing I've started.
What's that? You'll love it? Have

2112
02:19:37.760 --> 02:19:45.559
I heard this? No? Great? I'm not insane, folks, I'm

2113
02:19:45.639 --> 02:19:50.959
really not beardy. Man. Uh
when I got to bed, well,

2114
02:19:50.000 --> 02:19:54.520
first of all, that that whole
process is it to do? Because I

2115
02:19:54.879 --> 02:20:01.200
U, I'll be downstairs my bed
rooms upstairs, and I get so tired,

2116
02:20:01.200 --> 02:20:05.799
and I'll be so tired and I
can't imagine having the energy to do

2117
02:20:05.920 --> 02:20:07.000
the things I have to do to
get to bed. And that's a little

2118
02:20:07.040 --> 02:20:11.840
saying I have do the things you
have to do to get your ass to

2119
02:20:11.920 --> 02:20:15.600
bed? Is that dude? Like
sing songy? It's in my head?

2120
02:20:15.719 --> 02:20:18.920
Okay, but that's how I say, do the things you have to do

2121
02:20:18.079 --> 02:20:20.760
to get your ass to bed.
And at the time it seems like so

2122
02:20:20.959 --> 02:20:28.200
much stuff, So what are the
things? Smoke? Get the last year

2123
02:20:28.239 --> 02:20:31.600
and out of the old anchor.
It has to be a more efficient way

2124
02:20:31.639 --> 02:20:39.000
to say that. I year a
night, no so, and it's always

2125
02:20:39.040 --> 02:20:41.680
a cigarette and a pee. So
you get that out of the way,

2126
02:20:41.319 --> 02:20:45.360
and I go out and have a
cigarette on the porch. Before I get

2127
02:20:45.399 --> 02:20:48.520
the cigarette, I grab my car
keys and I make sure the cars locked.

2128
02:20:48.760 --> 02:20:52.600
You see the car flash, So
that's step one, you smoke.

2129
02:20:54.399 --> 02:20:58.959
I got the screen door. I
have to physically say out loud the door

2130
02:20:58.120 --> 02:21:01.559
thing is down, and then verify
this is locked, and then it's shut.

2131
02:21:01.639 --> 02:21:05.479
Turned click. With the wood door, you shut it, turn the

2132
02:21:05.559 --> 02:21:09.120
bolt. And then with my door, you have to shut it and you

2133
02:21:09.159 --> 02:21:13.479
can hear it audibly click. And
then I go in. Oh, and

2134
02:21:13.520 --> 02:21:18.079
I have to physically verify that the
bolt is through with my finger. And

2135
02:21:18.159 --> 02:21:22.000
then I step in the kitchen and
check the six stove things off off,

2136
02:21:22.239 --> 02:21:26.520
off, off, freezer and fridge
or both shut securely so I don't waste

2137
02:21:26.520 --> 02:21:28.559
any errorgy you will asleep. And
then I go out and I turn on

2138
02:21:28.600 --> 02:21:35.120
the hall light and I visually verify
that the bolt is through, and then

2139
02:21:35.159 --> 02:21:39.319
I walk across the living room and
I shut off Before I shot off light,

2140
02:21:39.399 --> 02:21:41.520
I look at the door and make
sure the door is locked, and

2141
02:21:41.600 --> 02:21:45.120
then I shot off light and I
go to bed. Is all these steps

2142
02:21:46.120 --> 02:21:46.799
the way you were cited of them? I think I know the answer to

2143
02:21:46.879 --> 02:21:50.120
this, but like, is it
like clockwork every day and we're like every

2144
02:21:50.239 --> 02:21:52.719
like do you ever miss one of
these? And sometimes I will do all

2145
02:21:52.799 --> 02:21:56.000
of that shit, go all the
way across the room and not be sure

2146
02:21:56.120 --> 02:22:01.799
that I visually and physically touched the
bolt. Yeah, so you'll wow.

2147
02:22:05.680 --> 02:22:09.440
I mean I like, like that's
not so far, Like everything you're doing

2148
02:22:09.680 --> 02:22:13.799
is for a reason. But like
I think it's the like the almost clinical,

2149
02:22:15.000 --> 02:22:16.000
just like stepped by something. Now
I do this, Now I do

2150
02:22:16.120 --> 02:22:20.280
this, Like it's the regimented thing
about it. Yeah, and I'm not

2151
02:22:20.319 --> 02:22:22.520
a doctor. I don't know what
that is, like OCD or whatever,

2152
02:22:22.600 --> 02:22:24.600
but like, of course it is. It sounds like well, I mean

2153
02:22:24.639 --> 02:22:28.079
I think a lot of people think
of like OCD is just that like you

2154
02:22:28.159 --> 02:22:31.079
know, stereotypical, like oh,
I gotta wash my hands twenty times in

2155
02:22:31.239 --> 02:22:35.520
tampadour and like, but you just
have a routine that yeah, and I

2156
02:22:35.680 --> 02:22:41.440
have to do it. I have
to do it. Man. That's so.

2157
02:22:41.959 --> 02:22:45.040
Have you been diagnosed with OCD?
No? No, do you think

2158
02:22:45.079 --> 02:22:48.799
you have it? Uh? Yeah? Yeah? And I've had you know,

2159
02:22:48.879 --> 02:22:52.719
almost every woman I've ever been with
in one way, shape or formance

2160
02:22:52.799 --> 02:22:56.280
told me that they thought I was
OCD. Yeah, and I probably am.

2161
02:22:58.200 --> 02:23:01.159
Yeah, I hesitate to like a
doctor or whatever, like sound was

2162
02:23:01.159 --> 02:23:07.520
like that certainly, Yeah, definitely
I think I had a doctor diagnosed me

2163
02:23:07.559 --> 02:23:09.840
with those CD ones. But like
I don't. I don't know if I

2164
02:23:09.959 --> 02:23:13.760
have that, you know, like
I because when I hear like you describe

2165
02:23:13.799 --> 02:23:16.399
that, or I hear like the
kind of like traditional OCV things or whatever,

2166
02:23:16.559 --> 02:23:20.360
like, I don't feel like I
have that. I think I can

2167
02:23:20.399 --> 02:23:24.200
fixate on thoughts and obsess over things
or like just one thing. It's just

2168
02:23:24.239 --> 02:23:26.200
like why isn't this or I need
I need to figure out what's going on

2169
02:23:26.200 --> 02:23:28.280
with this or whatever. It like
it's all I can think about, you

2170
02:23:28.360 --> 02:23:31.799
know, even if I try to
try my brain from it. But I

2171
02:23:31.840 --> 02:23:35.479
don't think I have the kind of
like regimented like I have to do this

2172
02:23:35.559 --> 02:23:37.040
and this and every single day I
do this. I just kind of you're

2173
02:23:37.120 --> 02:23:39.559
more free flowing. Yeah, I
feel like every day I just kind of

2174
02:23:39.559 --> 02:23:43.360
wing it. And you know what, tell does this? Can you relieve

2175
02:23:43.399 --> 02:23:46.200
to this at all? Because I
think this is how I approach everything.

2176
02:23:46.280 --> 02:23:50.360
It's just like whatever is in front
of my face at a given time,

2177
02:23:50.840 --> 02:23:56.479
that's what I'm doing. And I'm
really bad about if anything over here happens

2178
02:23:56.479 --> 02:23:58.479
like okay, if I'm doing this, oh yeah, I'm making this thing,

2179
02:23:58.520 --> 02:24:01.600
I'm doing this thing, I'm whatever, and then the thing calls my

2180
02:24:01.639 --> 02:24:03.520
attention over here, I get a
text or a notification or someone calls my

2181
02:24:03.600 --> 02:24:07.280
name or something, and it's like
ah, and then I just whatever I

2182
02:24:07.399 --> 02:24:09.920
was just doing is not even remotely
in my brain. Ye, and I

2183
02:24:11.000 --> 02:24:13.639
will forget I was doing that.
I misplace stuff all the time, I

2184
02:24:13.760 --> 02:24:18.040
miss I lose my phone constantly.
You know, I'm like that. But

2185
02:24:18.159 --> 02:24:24.079
I have learned to combat that by
so hardly focusing on one single thing.

2186
02:24:24.520 --> 02:24:28.639
Yeah, that I have to accomplish
it. Something is mundane, is like

2187
02:24:28.159 --> 02:24:31.040
checking your light bill or whatever.
Sure, if if that's what the thing

2188
02:24:31.079 --> 02:24:35.280
I was doing, I have to
make sure I do that and nothing else

2189
02:24:35.760 --> 02:24:39.319
can interfere, because if it does, I just go off all Willie Millie

2190
02:24:39.360 --> 02:24:43.399
and I lose focus, yeah,
and I can't get anything done. I

2191
02:24:43.600 --> 02:24:45.639
try to combat it with stuff like
you know, you can set else firsts

2192
02:24:45.680 --> 02:24:46.799
like do not disturb modes on your
phone and stuff like that, and so

2193
02:24:46.920 --> 02:24:50.360
it's like I know myself enough to
ward. It's like I need to just

2194
02:24:50.440 --> 02:24:54.120
ship. I'm almost always undo not
disturbed because phones are so bad about just

2195
02:24:54.200 --> 02:24:56.959
like mainge any noise or any it
lights up or something. It's like,

2196
02:24:56.000 --> 02:24:58.639
oh, well, I just they
haven't helped. Yeah, and it's just

2197
02:24:58.719 --> 02:25:01.120
so hard where it's like with what
I do and being on the computer so

2198
02:25:01.280 --> 02:25:05.440
much. It's just like between emails
coming in or somebody dmsman discord or I

2199
02:25:05.479 --> 02:25:09.440
get a text over here or this
andever someone just ringing my doorbell or the

2200
02:25:09.479 --> 02:25:11.600
dogs are freaking out about something.
It's just like any number of things in

2201
02:25:11.719 --> 02:25:15.639
just day to day life. You're
just constantly at risk. It's like,

2202
02:25:15.840 --> 02:25:18.120
oh, now there's this, and
then you forget this, you know,

2203
02:25:18.440 --> 02:25:22.879
like b happen Now I forgot a
That's why it's really difficult for me to

2204
02:25:22.000 --> 02:25:26.600
watch TV or movies. Well,
I have a strict like if I'm if

2205
02:25:26.639 --> 02:25:31.520
I'm watching watching something like you know, like succession is the show we watch

2206
02:25:31.600 --> 02:25:37.239
and religiously and pay attention to it. Phone is airplane mode. Everything is

2207
02:25:37.239 --> 02:25:39.319
just like I am watching this show. But then there's certain stuff too where

2208
02:25:39.319 --> 02:25:41.639
it's like, Okay, this is
a background thing we're putting on. Other

2209
02:25:41.719 --> 02:25:45.680
stuff's going on. You're like wrestling. It can be on the background and

2210
02:25:45.799 --> 02:25:48.159
checking phone or talking or whatever.
But like, if I want to actually

2211
02:25:48.200 --> 02:25:52.799
pay attention to something, I have
to strictly be like fucking nothing is making

2212
02:25:52.879 --> 02:25:56.840
noise. And another reason that kids
would probably be antithetical to that. Oh

2213
02:25:56.959 --> 02:26:01.040
yeah, yeah that sounds hard.
But yeah, so you have that too,

2214
02:26:01.120 --> 02:26:03.440
you can relate to that. I
don't know what that's radio. I

2215
02:26:03.440 --> 02:26:05.959
don't know that sci. I don't
know what an anxiety? What's that?

2216
02:26:07.200 --> 02:26:11.600
I call it single focus. It's
I'm very single focused. I've had I've

2217
02:26:11.639 --> 02:26:16.079
had pretty much every therapist I've ever
talked to thinks I have anxiety in one

2218
02:26:16.120 --> 02:26:20.040
form or another. And I don't
think that's true. But they're experts.

2219
02:26:20.239 --> 02:26:22.680
Yeah, and yeah, and I
don't know, because like talking to you,

2220
02:26:24.159 --> 02:26:28.479
I feel like we have very different
experiences with the things that, yeah,

2221
02:26:28.879 --> 02:26:31.120
they manifest themselves differently. Yeah,
yeah, I think if you have

2222
02:26:31.200 --> 02:26:35.000
anxiety which you might, you know. Certainly, I think it's a different

2223
02:26:35.040 --> 02:26:39.799
form than I have, certainly,
you know. But I've starting to worry

2224
02:26:39.799 --> 02:26:46.440
I just might be fucking lazy,
maybe slumping all in that. I know

2225
02:26:46.559 --> 02:26:50.600
that explains the fucking finger at the
door knob every night. I do think

2226
02:26:52.520 --> 02:26:58.399
I'm a person that performs best when
I absolutely have to do something. And

2227
02:26:58.559 --> 02:27:01.520
so if you know you have to
make a flight, you're gonna do that.

2228
02:27:01.719 --> 02:27:05.719
I'm thinking more in terms of like
a job situation, like like if

2229
02:27:05.799 --> 02:27:09.000
I am I know I have to
be at work at eight o'clock, I'll

2230
02:27:09.040 --> 02:27:11.920
be there. Yeah, I did
it for a long time. I was

2231
02:27:11.959 --> 02:27:16.159
the most dependable son of a bitch
in the post office they had, and

2232
02:27:16.360 --> 02:27:20.319
I'm not exaggerating, and in ten
years, I think I called in a

2233
02:27:20.479 --> 02:27:26.159
day and a half, working six
days a week. But I need that

2234
02:27:26.239 --> 02:27:30.840
structure. I do, and I
just don't have it. And I need

2235
02:27:30.879 --> 02:27:39.120
it, but I don't want it. I just don't. That's the thing

2236
02:27:39.159 --> 02:27:45.000
I love about eBay is once you
set up you know, ship tunnel listings

2237
02:27:45.079 --> 02:27:46.879
like I have. That's not a
lot of money, but it's something coming

2238
02:27:46.920 --> 02:27:52.479
in every day. You know,
every morning I wake up and I've sold

2239
02:27:52.559 --> 02:27:54.879
two or three things. It's not
a ton of money, but it's something,

2240
02:27:56.520 --> 02:28:03.120
you know. Yeah, well dad, I just got the first card

2241
02:28:03.200 --> 02:28:05.760
full error on that one there out
of film, out of film. The

2242
02:28:05.799 --> 02:28:11.680
other film ran out. They still
use film, it's rare. Pretty much

2243
02:28:11.680 --> 02:28:15.440
everything's digital, like the rare show
we'll use film. Do you remember one

2244
02:28:15.479 --> 02:28:18.559
our photos? Yeah? Yeah,
now you're doing stuff. Yeah, that

2245
02:28:18.719 --> 02:28:22.559
was such a big event in people's
lives getting something like well, especially when

2246
02:28:22.600 --> 02:28:24.559
you came back from vacation. Sure, yeah, you dropped that little roll

2247
02:28:24.600 --> 02:28:28.760
off and that little thing that people
put pot in and then you know,

2248
02:28:28.959 --> 02:28:31.680
right yeah, and then you get
it back and you're so excited to see

2249
02:28:31.680 --> 02:28:35.440
your pictures. Yeah. No,
I definitely remember that. I remember going

2250
02:28:35.479 --> 02:28:39.799
to a bunch of like wrestling events
and stuff, and that was you'd see

2251
02:28:39.840 --> 02:28:43.760
your stuff afterwards. So we're all
or all major films done digitally now,

2252
02:28:43.840 --> 02:28:48.959
not all, but pretty largely.
That's kind of how it's done. Like

2253
02:28:48.079 --> 02:28:52.520
I want to say, I think
Succession does things on film, and that's

2254
02:28:52.879 --> 02:28:58.840
a real rarity. Um didn't they
do um super eight on that super eight

2255
02:29:00.079 --> 02:29:05.040
oh the movie super super type of
film? Um? Because they were trying

2256
02:29:05.040 --> 02:29:07.840
to catch that seventies feel to it
or eighties. Yeah, I think that's

2257
02:29:07.920 --> 02:29:09.680
eighties. Yeah, yeah, that
it might have. I mean it happens

2258
02:29:09.719 --> 02:29:13.879
from time to time. It's rare
um, but yeah, some things will.

2259
02:29:15.760 --> 02:29:22.799
Oh we didn't talk about Jennie Gershawn. Yeah, I had this.

2260
02:29:22.079 --> 02:29:28.040
I started this thought process years ago. But it was about Fair Faucet because

2261
02:29:28.120 --> 02:29:33.280
Farair was about let's see, I'm
sixty now she would have been Let's see,

2262
02:29:33.360 --> 02:29:39.079
that was fourteen years ago, so
Fair would be like seventy four now,

2263
02:29:39.239 --> 02:29:45.799
right, sure, but Farare was
like my it girl growing up.

2264
02:29:46.959 --> 02:29:50.840
It was just you, Yeah,
just me. I was the only one

2265
02:29:50.920 --> 02:29:54.719
that bought that poster. Yeah.
A lot of times, well they would

2266
02:29:54.719 --> 02:30:01.000
get all soggy anyway, goodness crazy, good lord, call the cops,

2267
02:30:01.079 --> 02:30:03.840
which revised, we gotta tell us
her about my mom and the poster.

2268
02:30:05.360 --> 02:30:09.520
Do you know about this? Oh
yes, it explains a lot about me

2269
02:30:09.799 --> 02:30:13.280
because yeah, but anyway, so
Fairs, My plan was, I I

2270
02:30:13.399 --> 02:30:18.680
always was just so passionate about Fair
as thought she was gorgeous and sweet again

2271
02:30:18.760 --> 02:30:26.639
just you. So my plan was
to ride it out and tell her age

2272
02:30:26.719 --> 02:30:31.360
her not her age, to tell
her looks deteriorated enough as she gets hard

2273
02:30:31.399 --> 02:30:33.600
to say, have you've been drinking? Cops should ask you to say deteriorated

2274
02:30:33.639 --> 02:30:37.680
when they pulled you over, All
right, son, say deteriorated, deteriated?

2275
02:30:37.959 --> 02:30:43.280
All right? Come with me,
Um, Tell her looks slipped enough

2276
02:30:43.360 --> 02:30:46.079
to where she would consider dating a
slept like me. Wait a minute,

2277
02:30:46.079 --> 02:30:50.600
are yours in this scenario just staying
frozen in time? You're not? And

2278
02:30:50.719 --> 02:30:56.319
that didn't count, no, because
we're both gross. Okay, but she's

2279
02:30:56.319 --> 02:31:00.319
still like, does the gap get
less wide? There? Oh? But

2280
02:31:00.600 --> 02:31:03.239
I would be gross too, but
a little less gross than her, because

2281
02:31:03.319 --> 02:31:09.559
why are you less gross than fair
Foster? You're fucking this up just because

2282
02:31:09.639 --> 02:31:15.719
she'd be like seventy five and I'd
be like sixty three. Okay, just

2283
02:31:15.840 --> 02:31:20.360
shut up. So anyway, her
looks have faded dramatically, and so of

2284
02:31:20.479 --> 02:31:26.479
mine. But she's at the point
where sixty three year old spride dude like

2285
02:31:26.639 --> 02:31:33.680
me spry. No one's called you
spry ever once, not when you were

2286
02:31:33.760 --> 02:31:39.399
twenty, spry when I was eight. No. The theory is that she

2287
02:31:39.959 --> 02:31:41.879
her looks are gone enough to where
she would consider dating a guy like me,

2288
02:31:43.159 --> 02:31:46.440
that's the thing. But she had
the nerve to die on me.

2289
02:31:48.760 --> 02:31:52.680
It was horribly sad. The same
week is Michael Jackson, but she got

2290
02:31:52.879 --> 02:31:56.079
the short shrift on that, by
the way, because it was any other

2291
02:31:56.120 --> 02:31:58.559
week she had been the big news
story and Ed mcmontoo they all died the

2292
02:31:58.600 --> 02:32:03.239
same week. Oh yeah, we
got to talk about French Ed McMahon too.

2293
02:32:07.120 --> 02:32:13.079
So once Farah had passed, unfortunately, my focus shifted to we stopped

2294
02:32:13.120 --> 02:32:18.200
doing stupid nerdy stuff. Nobody cares. Everybody's dying, nobody cares, nobody's

2295
02:32:18.239 --> 02:32:26.000
watching what we're doing. So my
focus shifted after Fara unfortunately passed to Gina

2296
02:32:26.040 --> 02:32:28.840
Gershawn, who is about I think
two or three years older than me.

2297
02:32:30.399 --> 02:32:33.280
Sure, who's just ridiculously sexy.
And I'm always it's doing a thing.

2298
02:32:35.200 --> 02:32:37.680
You're fine. So I always had
a thing for her, just me,

2299
02:32:39.200 --> 02:32:43.479
Yeah, just you. So it's
the same plan now with her. I'm

2300
02:32:43.479 --> 02:32:46.000
going to ride this out until we're
both old and gross, and then she'll

2301
02:32:46.040 --> 02:32:50.280
consider dating me. Is she gonna
think you're the best option? At that

2302
02:32:50.360 --> 02:32:54.319
age she'll be out of her mind
and won't know. So you're gonna wait

2303
02:32:54.399 --> 02:32:58.360
until someone becomes senile. Also,
I don't think she's SEENI I think not

2304
02:32:58.520 --> 02:33:03.959
yet. Doing great. Right now, I can't approve of this plan.

2305
02:33:03.959 --> 02:33:09.159
I think this is a bad plan. I think it's there's some problems here.

2306
02:33:09.520 --> 02:33:16.959
Plan C is Susannah Hoffs who Bengals
lady. She's older in me too.

2307
02:33:16.639 --> 02:33:24.680
Wow, it seems likely then it
could happened. No, no it

2308
02:33:24.799 --> 02:33:30.959
can't. That's the plant. So
Gina, if you're out there, I

2309
02:33:31.040 --> 02:33:33.639
get it now, she's watching.
I get it now. There's no interest.

2310
02:33:33.760 --> 02:33:39.760
I'm not even interested in me.
I understand why you're not. But

2311
02:33:39.879 --> 02:33:46.559
about ten years we're on where me
and you? Gina? Uh? Church,

2312
02:33:46.239 --> 02:33:50.000
God, damn it. We have
to end this. You need to

2313
02:33:50.040 --> 02:33:56.879
just stop saying things, specifically Church, most other things. See you to

2314
02:33:56.879 --> 02:34:00.559
see a car, I mean there's
a street there at the cops. Yeah,

2315
02:34:00.600 --> 02:34:03.559
I saw it. Gain, Yeah
there's a street. What were we

2316
02:34:03.639 --> 02:34:07.840
saying about ghosts? Earlier? There
was a twitch question about do you believe

2317
02:34:07.879 --> 02:34:13.840
in ghosts? No, it was
before that. I don't know. Just

2318
02:34:15.079 --> 02:34:18.840
wrap this up. You think I'm
having fun. We just were running out

2319
02:34:18.879 --> 02:34:26.000
of film. What kind of what
kind of cheap ass batteries did you buy

2320
02:34:26.079 --> 02:34:28.639
for these things? Cheap ass?
But we've been going, we've been going.

2321
02:34:30.040 --> 02:34:33.479
It takes me the card has been
getting full. Let's see, we've

2322
02:34:33.520 --> 02:34:37.680
been going for three hours and again
we can still stay out here. How

2323
02:34:37.760 --> 02:34:39.159
long U till this is on the
TV? On the TV? Well,

2324
02:34:39.200 --> 02:34:43.799
I'm gonna be out of town for
four days and the biggest game of the

2325
02:34:43.879 --> 02:34:48.559
last fucking six years is coming out
on Friday. So yeah, when you

2326
02:34:48.600 --> 02:34:52.680
get to play it. That's a
long story. But released day along with

2327
02:34:52.760 --> 02:34:56.360
everyone. I hate complaining about not
playing stuff on pre release, but that's

2328
02:34:56.959 --> 02:35:01.319
Nintendo Jail's a long story. So
and you don't care. So when you

2329
02:35:01.479 --> 02:35:05.280
do, will you sit down for
like hours and days? Breath of Wild?

2330
02:35:05.760 --> 02:35:11.680
I had two or three weeks early
and I was literally like every day,

2331
02:35:11.959 --> 02:35:15.479
putting like sixteen eighteen hour days into
it. Were you in the industry

2332
02:35:15.520 --> 02:35:18.520
then five years ago? I don't
know where you might have been with the

2333
02:35:18.799 --> 02:35:22.120
w W oh no no no.
I was a giant bomb. Yeah yeah,

2334
02:35:22.319 --> 02:35:28.120
okay, yeah, yep, so
it was. But also if I

2335
02:35:28.280 --> 02:35:31.520
wasn't, I mean, it wasn't
just pure old work ethic. It was

2336
02:35:31.799 --> 02:35:35.639
it was like I was fucking feeling
like a kid again in a way I

2337
02:35:35.719 --> 02:35:39.360
had and then forever and uh man, yeah you knew why you know A

2338
02:35:39.399 --> 02:35:41.760
celebrity I used to think would like
me if they had the chance to meet

2339
02:35:41.799 --> 02:35:48.520
me. Who's that Sheryl Crow?
Why? Why would she like? He

2340
02:35:48.600 --> 02:35:54.239
had a lot in common? Let's
hear it. She she fingers her doorknob

2341
02:35:54.319 --> 02:35:58.040
every night and looks at the oven
knobs, and she'd write a song about

2342
02:35:58.079 --> 02:36:01.040
that. Yeah, that's her big
hit. All I want to do is

2343
02:36:01.159 --> 02:36:03.799
touch the door knobs and look at
make sure the fridge is shut, so

2344
02:36:03.799 --> 02:36:09.280
I don't waste money like energy bills
too wordy. I I don't know what

2345
02:36:09.440 --> 02:36:11.600
she called it. It was p
parenthetical. But yeah, we're both from

2346
02:36:11.799 --> 02:36:16.399
she's from Missouri. Okay, so
we're both from Missouri. Uh huh,

2347
02:36:16.639 --> 02:36:20.719
both big fans of music. Both
had sex with kid Rock. I don't

2348
02:36:20.719 --> 02:36:24.719
know she did. She just made
that. Just the song made it seem

2349
02:36:24.760 --> 02:36:31.680
like she did did. Yeah,
and it's also bad in Lance Armstrong.

2350
02:36:31.399 --> 02:36:37.280
Really yeah, she she picked some
interesting ones, all right. Anyway,

2351
02:36:37.479 --> 02:36:41.920
So I guess you would, Lance
Armstrong, Eric Clapton, Kid Rock you

2352
02:36:41.239 --> 02:36:45.360
Okay, I got two balls,
no beer. It's a murderers row there,

2353
02:36:45.559 --> 02:36:50.479
Jesus Christ Haul Reichert, Eric Clapton, Lance Armstrong, I think you're

2354
02:36:50.520 --> 02:36:56.559
the least problematic. I don't know
anyway, And we're about the seme Ah.

2355
02:36:56.639 --> 02:37:01.840
She's actually like a year too older
than me. I think it worked

2356
02:37:01.840 --> 02:37:07.120
out. No, I don't think
it would. Dad. I mean this

2357
02:37:07.239 --> 02:37:09.200
with all the love and respect in
the world. I think she's got better

2358
02:37:09.280 --> 02:37:16.360
options. I don't know. She's
been through the the gamut of celebrity boys.

2359
02:37:16.719 --> 02:37:22.319
Time for a retired mailman who has
to take two hours to hype himself

2360
02:37:22.399 --> 02:37:28.000
up for his shower, she has
the value of a cupon. I don't

2361
02:37:28.159 --> 02:37:33.159
think she thinks about cupons. No, I don't think Cheryl Crowe uses cupons.

2362
02:37:33.799 --> 02:37:37.479
That's a good question, Cheryl.
No, it's not. She's watching.

2363
02:37:39.440 --> 02:37:43.159
Her and Gina are having a girl's
night. They're watching this video together.

2364
02:37:43.879 --> 02:37:52.920
Paul dreaming. Ghost of Farah's here? No, not interested dead.

2365
02:37:54.159 --> 02:38:03.200
I don't want him. Oh man. Yeah, I kept trying to tell

2366
02:38:03.280 --> 02:38:07.600
everybody else in America sexy. She
wasn't nobody pay attention to it. I

2367
02:38:07.719 --> 02:38:09.600
know you were the only one side. I kept going, look at this

2368
02:38:09.680 --> 02:38:15.479
poster. Did you see this fucking
poster? Get that thing away from me?

2369
02:38:16.000 --> 02:38:20.399
Oh talking about your mom and Sheryl
Tigues. Yeah, No, the

2370
02:38:20.440 --> 02:38:22.399
poster Oh was that the poster?
Okay, yeah, I'm sure all these

2371
02:38:22.719 --> 02:38:26.520
folks here know who Sheryl Tigus was. Oh, I'm having a pain right

2372
02:38:26.600 --> 02:38:33.040
here. That's good. I hope
sixty seems great. I hope we get

2373
02:38:33.120 --> 02:38:41.079
the video evidence of my death on
a deck. Nice snort. No,

2374
02:38:41.360 --> 02:38:45.799
when I was a teenager, I
had a poster of Sheryl Tiggs, who

2375
02:38:45.840 --> 02:38:48.879
was a big swimsuit model. She
was on sports wholster it swimsuit issue,

2376
02:38:48.879 --> 02:38:52.440
blah blah blah, big sex symbol. So I had this sexy poster of

2377
02:38:52.520 --> 02:38:56.239
her in a swimsuit. And one
day, when I was in school,

2378
02:38:58.120 --> 02:39:05.639
my mother made a swimsuit top,
bikini top and a bikini bottom out of

2379
02:39:05.760 --> 02:39:13.479
some kind of cloth and taped it
over her photographed bikini to make her look

2380
02:39:13.559 --> 02:39:16.799
less revealing. And I came home
and that's what I saw in my bedroom.

2381
02:39:18.959 --> 02:39:22.479
And what were the songs that your
mother found uh too sexual for you

2382
02:39:22.559 --> 02:39:28.280
to listen to? It? I
remember three? Um, that's wait.

2383
02:39:28.360 --> 02:39:31.200
First, let's talk about the ones
she did not raise an eyebrow about,

2384
02:39:31.559 --> 02:39:37.120
which were acdc's given the dog a
bone. Let's get it up, Let's

2385
02:39:37.159 --> 02:39:41.479
get it up. Okay, So
these no red flags but too sexual?

2386
02:39:41.639 --> 02:39:48.879
Were that smell by Leonard Skinner,
which, yeah, it was about it

2387
02:39:48.000 --> 02:39:52.360
was about drug and alcohol abuse,
Yes, but she didn't care to listen

2388
02:39:52.360 --> 02:39:56.600
to lyrics. Obviously. There was
a song by Rspeedwagon called keep Pushing,

2389
02:39:56.760 --> 02:40:01.840
which was about you can't a spell
on. I'm just what are you doing?

2390
02:40:03.399 --> 02:40:09.079
I'm checking the fucking the film levels
that smell by Leonard skinnerd said,

2391
02:40:09.319 --> 02:40:13.440
oh Ario Speedwagon keep Pushing, which
was about perseverance and never giving up,

2392
02:40:13.760 --> 02:40:22.200
not about boning boning, and uh, oh, don't do me like Tom

2393
02:40:22.280 --> 02:40:24.959
Petty. Don't do me like that, which was like, don't treat me

2394
02:40:26.000 --> 02:40:28.959
bad in a relationship, and she
thought it was a sexual thing. Yeah,

2395
02:40:30.120 --> 02:40:33.200
so it was fun growing up Kansas. I say that, but I

2396
02:40:33.280 --> 02:40:37.079
had a great childhood. I did, you did? We We ranked your

2397
02:40:37.120 --> 02:40:41.040
decades. We did a tier list
of your decades and they were a total

2398
02:40:41.120 --> 02:40:43.760
reverse order. It was yeah,
you were ten to twenty was number one,

2399
02:40:45.000 --> 02:40:46.799
Zero to ten was number two,
twenty thirty was number three, and

2400
02:40:46.879 --> 02:40:52.239
then setting decline. Oh yeah,
yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah,

2401
02:40:52.760 --> 02:40:56.479
Oh lord, I'm tired. Here
we go. Well it's three in the

2402
02:40:56.559 --> 02:41:00.639
morning. No, no, it's
just yeah, yeah, it's an appropect.

2403
02:41:00.680 --> 02:41:01.760
Time to be tired. We're out
of film. For God's sake,

2404
02:41:01.879 --> 02:41:07.280
film we should wrap every time,
trying to wrap for the last two everybody,

2405
02:41:07.799 --> 02:41:11.719
No, are we good to rap? I'm enjoying this. I am

2406
02:41:11.799 --> 02:41:18.520
two. This is great. Your
voice is getting high. Ah. That's

2407
02:41:18.520 --> 02:41:22.639
one of my favorite memories of you. Was in San Francisco, mean abouts

2408
02:41:22.639 --> 02:41:26.040
of your friends and one of it. I think it was me that realized

2409
02:41:26.079 --> 02:41:28.079
that when you were full shit,
you're lying about something or defensive. Your

2410
02:41:28.120 --> 02:41:35.680
voice got highed and everybody realized it
was true. And you went on to

2411
02:41:35.760 --> 02:41:39.239
prove it throughout the night. But
my voice getting high. And then we

2412
02:41:39.360 --> 02:41:43.879
spent we ended the evening on a
rooftop eating donuts. Socrates dropped his donut.

2413
02:41:43.399 --> 02:41:52.120
That's so out of context. Oh
god, oh lordy, Well,

2414
02:41:52.319 --> 02:41:58.360
folks at home, beardy man three
thousand? What was the other one?

2415
02:41:58.920 --> 02:42:07.639
I don't remember from the north thing. I'm tired and kind of drunk.

2416
02:42:09.799 --> 02:42:13.959
I'm going back home tomorrow, folks. So Gina, if you're listening,

2417
02:42:15.079 --> 02:42:20.200
baby, I'll be in can See
tomorrow. Let's do lunch. We can

2418
02:42:20.879 --> 02:42:28.079
come over and smoke cigarettes and do
the family Guy to dance. The first

2419
02:42:28.120 --> 02:42:37.360
ten I'll be her first ten What
a beautiful send off, say you buy

2420
02:42:37.440 --> 02:42:41.520
to the folks. It could happen. It's not. It's not gonna happen

2421
02:42:41.600 --> 02:42:46.440
soon. It's gonna take at least
another ten years. Well, every room

2422
02:42:46.559 --> 02:42:50.200
wishes you the best of life.
I'll be seventy and she'll be like seventy

2423
02:42:50.280 --> 02:42:56.159
two. She'll have burned through all
her celebrities film money. She'll be kind

2424
02:42:56.200 --> 02:43:01.079
of gross. Jesus, I'll be
kind of gross. We'll be gross together.

2425
02:43:01.920 --> 02:43:05.600
You and me, Gina, just
romantic to the end. Let's get

2426
02:43:05.639 --> 02:43:15.520
gross together. Oh it might be
bad at this. All right, Well

2427
02:43:16.040 --> 02:43:18.079
you want to send him off with
your new cool thing, Dad, Church,

2428
02:43:20.399 --> 02:43:24.159
that one? Yeah, it's give
one, just good, definitive one

2429
02:43:24.200 --> 02:43:28.200
there and tell them to say it's
about time to wraps up. All right,

2430
02:43:28.319 --> 02:43:30.840
Dad, it's been a great night. It's been great having you here,

2431
02:43:31.239 --> 02:43:35.200
but I think it's time to call
it a night. Church. Let's bounce