Uh, what's up, everybody? Welcome to our Thursday show, our Thursday
episode of Rose Pricks, where we cover Vanderpump rules. Uh, the whole
Tom Scanda all saga is what's in our wheelhouse? Y'all? I'm coming in
hot again. And I'm just gonna say this. And if this is gonna
trigger anybody, or if anybody's gonna feel trigger, are you okay? If
you're gonna feel some type of way, I'm gonna tell you I'm coming in
hot for Rockell right now. And I know that we all are, but
like, I'm coming in real hot and I'm not. It doesn't mean Sandivals
off the hoog, it doesn't mean Schwartz is off the hug. But I
am real mad and I'm not here. I'm not going easy. And I
kind of just want to call her Rachel, like I do you want whispering,
because it's not like you're calling her out of her name. It's like
she just decided to do a reality show and change her name to Roque Hell.
It's not like she had an entire you know what I'm saying, Like
I call it, I completely get it. I'm I don't. Yeah,
it's it's ridiculous. She's all it's because she's phony. She's a phony baloney.
She's not only phony, and we're gonna get to all this, but
she's dumb as fuck. And I'm sorry, I'm tired of not saying it.
I'm gonna say it. I'm so dumb um. I all all these
guys like her. Though she's not that pretty. It's not it's not like,
oh God, I know she's like a train wreck, but she's so
gorgeous. I don't see it. She looks a little bit muppety, but
so do I. So I kind of can't, like, you know,
not coming for that. I do want to say I do. Here's a
little fun a little fun thing from this last week. I went to a
bar with a friend of mine. They have a thing called Eighties Night in
West Hollywood. And I didn't even tell you this, but I saw Schwartz.
I saw Tom Schwartz. You did, I did. I was with
my friend and I saw him and I was like, oh my god.
My friend didn't know who it was because he doesn't watch and I was like,
hey Tom, and he said hey back. But that was it.
It's not the first time I've seen him. I saw him. I used
to see him all the time at Sunset five there's a Starbucks there at Sunset
and Crescent Heights, and he had this very he's a very pleasant you know,
as they say online, he's like a he's like a dumb golden retriever.
It's hard. It's hard to be mad at him, and yet here
we are. Yeah, yeah, I don't like him, no, I
know, but there's something very compared to stand of all. Maybe there's just
there's always been sort of been gentle thing with Schwartz. That was kind of
he was goofy and fun. I don't know, I just I fucked her,
but I was so I was so blackout, drag guck. I don't
know, Katie, but in real life he is very attractive. And I
did say hello, and I didn't. But we'll come back to that.
Okay, so this episode, well we'll come back to that as though I
went, we'll come back to that. But just spoiler, I went home
with him, but we'll cut you know what. Let's go in order.
Let's go and order of how this happened. I think this is so uncomfortable
though right now, because he's here, is that your place? I'm looking
for him right now. Hey, you're sure it's Tom Schwartz. It's no,
it's one hundred shorts because people they will go anywhere. He doesn't have
much going on. Oh shoot it is Peter. Oh my godtail, my
ponytail. Like I love that he grew back. Ask him if he wants
just just say, like, listen, I love your hair down. I
love it in the ponytail. But can we Let's let's put some beads in
there. The beads. Let's all right. So we start off at the
beginning of this episode where James is just acted like a drunk asshold and scared
his girlfriend away and she stole off. So we we come into this episode
with a good The producers are like, well, how do you normally respond
to conflict? And she's like, um, I don't know. I guess
I just oftentimes like walk away, which I don't think that's fair. It's
like, well, kind of conflict like when you and your boyfriend get into
a little like argument about what restaurant to go do, like do storm off
or do you storm off when your boyfriend's being abusive to his friends. That's
such a good point because they yeah, you're right. They set it up
like, oh, she's I can't handle conflict at all. But James is
yelling at women, yeah, yelling at everyone for no reason always, And
I love that Arianna. I love that she's like, oh fuck no,
she's not having it. And I like how strong she's already been the season,
right, yeah, okay, so she went up and did you notice
Yeah, Roquell just smiles. So she loves it. She loves seeing Ariana
mad because like, of course that's the person she's cheating on. She's like
fucking her over without her knowing. And she loves Ali because Ali's storming off
because that's James's you know, yep, now chick, And she loves She's
not good, No, she's a bad person. And then James does not
go after his girlfriend, who he claims is like the new the love of
his life. He's never loved anyone like her, but he just sits there
with his friends. Why because he knows where's bread is buttered. Oh,
such a good point, and he's just so god okay, already guys though
that you're you're in love with this guy, he acts like a complete asshole.
You walk, you leave the table, and he doesn't go, oh,
I think I fucked up. I'll be back, guys. To be
fair to James, and I cannot believe I'm saying this, but remember the
episode that he was mad. They were doing boys' night guy's night, and
ben Kell showed up with Sam because of course that was already happening with handiball.
But she shows up all like, and it's good. They were so
mean to me at the lake, so I'm here. And he did immediately
text Ali because she made it clear she didn't really want James hanging around her
that much, understandably, and and she writes, Ali just wrote okay,
so then leave, and James just got up and left, So I will
give a lot of guys wouldn't even do that. To be fair, he's
you're right, I underestimated him. He Here's what's really weird Stuffinitely okay.
James has been here for like, I want to say, like six weeks.
Six weeks. Well, and it's weird because he's in like mostly in
my kitchen. He's always making stuff like cocktails and I'm like, are those
mocktails or what? He won't answer, and he's like, no, why
about it? This is what's been going on for a long time, and
now he's saying he has squatters rights. Oh my gosh, do you feel
comfortable like talking about it? Is he gonna get Is he gonna get angry?
Well, it's a one bedroom apartment and he is angry and he's listening,
So yeah, I do feel uncomfortable if I'm honest, um, And
you know who else is here? So I know Peter's at your house,
which is weird that you never told you just said it when we started this.
But I guess it's weird that I can tell you about James, but
Randall Evans here. James, is he doing cocaine off of Hooker's But no,
it's off my button. And that's why I'm uncomfortable, because I'm like,
I don't have my summer body yet. I'm not ready. It's just
a lot going on, you guys, and so I just want you to
appreciate that we're bringing you these podcasts because these guys like they will not well
while all this is going on. Katie and Tom go to dinner too,
I don't know, celebrate their divorce. I wanted to know what you think
of the fact that he still calls her bubbs. I'm so sorn about it.
I am so I'm going to take a side that's probably not very um.
A lot of people aren't gonna like this, not very popular, Okay,
Um. I think Shwarts. I think there there. They have a
toxic relationship. They have for a long We followed them for what ten years,
and you know, he hate that the term gaslight came up, but
he does gaslight her constantly, and she just and we see her and then
you get to go, oh, she's the bad guy. Oh she just
doesn't like it that he's sucking all these off. But it's just Shwarts and
I hate that. But there's also a little, little tiny side to me
that kind of loves them together and loves that at least they're trying to stay
friends. And I always love the bubba thing, and he's trying to find
a middle ground. He's saying, Okay, we called each other bubba or
whatever, and now I'm going to shorten it for the friendship version. But
she still means something to me, and I think that she I think you
know that I'm the queen of staying friends with axes. It's it's important to
me too. I think if you've and I think you too, Like if
you've loved someone unless they were awful in your life, but if you love
them to some degree, like they can find a space in your life in
a different way. And I think that's what they're trying to do. And
I love that they're trying to do it. I think they're Okay, well
I agree with you. Oh I okay, something wrong with like so what
so they're still like kind of close and they still have whatever their nickname they
are married ten years college freak a nickname if you want to why is everybody
so like Nope, that person you cannot you have to just what she now
has to just go shorts like yeah, exactly or taugh Thomas, I friend
that we called each other sticks and sticky and sticky pad. I don't know
why. It was just the joke. I guess it was just like whatever
you can think of, and we still call each other that And that was
twenty years ago. Yeah, so it's my husband asshole all the time.
And if I'm sure if we were divorced, oh no, even fighted him.
Wait was that Peter or John Peter? That was that sounds like Peter.
That was a different guy. That was a third guy. I don't
know who was that with that Sandoval. Someone is a lawyer that seems over
up me like Sandival, and I am just shocked right now. I just
can't believe all these guys are at her high. I'm I'm less surprised at
your house because you live in the valley and they live in the valley,
But like, how did they find my apartment? All right, we're moving,
We're moving forward. Tom, this was bothering me. So Schwartz and
Katie are having this very romantic date to get this divorced to sell to sort
of well that's it was supposed to be romantic, but it kind of was
a little too much, so, which I think with them gave stress to
Katie. I think, well, also Tom is it seems very sort of
adhd where you know, Katie's trying to talk to him. She's like,
all right, well, let's like have a conversation and Tom's like, m
my suit's too tight, Like, oh I gotta but in my suit.
Oh I used to, you know, I used to look really good in
my suit and like Tom, Yeah, she's always sort of on, she
can't. I think there are parts of the relationship we didn't see, but
I think I don't think Tom goes Swartz doesn't go deep very often. I
can tell. I think Katie wants to go a little bit deeper, and
she's trying to. She's always been the grown up in this relationship and they're
making the waiters so uncomfortable. That poor waiter, I know. And then
so I thought this was just my take and I haven't you know, I'm
coming into this after missing a few seasons. But I felt like Schwartz was
kind of trying to get her upset because I felt like she kept being like,
all right, already, but like that's not really how things were or
whatever, and he's like, oh they were. And then just when she's
like okay, whatever, he's like, you're a provocateur. Yes, he's
doing the thing, and then accusing her of i thing he's doing. If
I were her, I would have done the same. I would have been
like fuck off by like why would you sit there and listen to that shit?
I mean, Katie was put through the r I'm so team Katie right
now. And I said this last week. Two people have been hard on
her for so long because she's just you know, yeah, she can be
a Debbie downer, but like she is just taking the brunt of everything these
last couple episodes, and she didn't do anything to deserve it, I don't
think. And she's just trying to be a grown up. She's like,
Okay, we closed on our house. It was a time. I still
love you as a person. But Schwartz is gonna Schwartz. He's eight years
old, and she has to sit up, and then she brings up.
They show some flashbacks and she brings up the thing is like again, why
don't you ever defend me? You're right, never on my side? Right,
And then they go to when when they ask her why she thinks that
is, she says, which I thought was pretty deep, she's like,
well, I think like he might love me, he doesn't like me.
Yeah, that was and I think it's probably true. And a lot of
that was Sandoval in his ear the whole time. Sandoval never liked Katie.
And PS, I'm not going to go that like easy on Ariana today either.
I know she's the hero and she wore the hot dress to the reunion
and we're not there yet, and I'm sad for her what happened, But
she has not been a friend to a lot of people. Either no,
she's gonna she's gonna hear it from me, not from me, She's gonna
hear it from me John or whoever. John was kind of watching this with
me and he's like, is there anybody likable? There any grounding characters?
And they said, not really, not really, because as sure as hell,
isn't Sheina. So let's get to Shena's dumb ass. She has all
these stupid events for her wedding weekend. Oh my god. I loved when
La was like, she's got the dinner, and she's got the party,
and then she's got the dinner before the dinner, and then she's got the
rehearsal for the party, and then she's got the party party. It was
so funny. We all know people like that. Why do you have to
have eighteen events? And this is now my first wedding. Her first wedding
was that way as well, like you already did the first wedding, we
had to go through. Fucking shame. She's got a baby, yes,
it wasn't even long ago. It's weird when they always forget they have babies.
But when at one point when Sheina and Lala were talking. They're like,
Okay, I gotta go take care of my baby. Okay, I
gotta go take care It's like, oh my god, I forgot they have
like in two year olds, right, Like it would be one thing.
My point of that is it would be one thing if like, Okay,
well you were in your twenties and you got married and you have a child
from that marriage, and now your kid's like sixteen, and it's like you,
you know whatever you dated and now you've really met like the love of
your life or your second chapter. No, this is not that your baby's
like one and a half, right, Like who's watching the Blacks with you?
Having to be with Brock the man bun, you know Brock. But
okay, So, so then before we go back to Katie and Schwartz,
Arianna and James somehow hug it out. That was fine. I don't know
why. I mean, I get it. Better to make peace, I
guess, than fight with that little chihuahua not to quote Roquel. Okay,
So then Katie and Schwartz start fighting, which is not a surprise, and
it just made it really like made me so sad when Katie just kept so
it goes back and forth. It's showing them back and forth. It shows
a little bit of Arianna that it goes back to Katie and Schwartz at their
dinner and Katie starts to say, and this is what broke my heart.
She's like Tom saying all this bullshit, and she's like, be real,
be real, be real, be real and starts crying because he's just lying.
He's rewriting everything. Oh right, right right? Yeah, So and
then are you talking about when Katie was in the hotel room talking about him?
No, no, no, no, no, I'm still at dinner
because we splashing all over the place. So now we're at the dinner.
I thought, okay, Yeah, So he's saying like he blames he basically
blames Katie for Sheena being mean to her, for Roquell being mean to her.
Like she's telling Katie it's Katie's fault, and I got I got so
mad, like so for Shena and Rockhill to be mean to Katie, like,
oh, it's Katie's fault. She deserves it. That's coming from Schwartz,
the guy like was married to her for so long. And that's the
thing that's where like they could I'm just I'm so mad at him. I
just he doesn't have to be like this. He doesn't have to at all.
Okay, So back at the La La James Shena table. Ali comes
back to the table James's girlfriend, right, and then all of a sudden,
sheina, I see that I'm coming into Shena. I remember her from
early seasons. Didn't like her, and now I really don't like her.
Now she's ridiculous and she's like, I want everybody to come in the catamaran
and like, so Laala tries to say, like, yeah, I don't
think I'm gonna go, and she's such a bitch about it. Oh my
god, doesn't think. She doesn't close her She doesn't have it from her
mouth either. She has her veneers are so big. I've seen her original
teeth, by the way, So she has these veneers and so she claimed
and cried her teeth. She's it's so fucking oh my god, I've never
I want to cut. I don't want to say it's I'm not like an
a van go myself. But some of us, like you know, what,
would would hearing loss be that awful at this point, then not hearing
Shena, I really and Roquel's dumb hat really like triggered me. So Shena
is really mad because Laala doesn't want to come on the catamarran, even though
she's gonna have like eighteen other girls on her catamaran. But she's upset because
Laala doesn't want to go because she doesn't feel safe around Rocket. She doesn't
want to get into a fight with Roquel, which we can all objectively be
on Lalla's side on this totally sucks and is probably going to start shit with
her because she's super passive aggressive. And then Shena pulls the hole ya mean,
yeah, this is my wedding trip, you guys, this is my
wedding. Everything is. She's just such there's not a reason. Even if
there's not a reason for Laala to not want to go on the dumb boat
like she's I have to. She's a grown woman, she's tired. She
can like sit out a thing. She doesn't have to have a reason like,
oh, I just don't want to be She could just be like,
I'm really tired. I think I'm gonna read my book by the pool,
right, you don't have to go to every event. I'm actually very pro
Laila in this episode. Okay, okay, so Brock pops in into it,
Okay, what about that when like Brock like pops in and he's like,
well, we just to Lala. He's like, he's like, well,
I mean, we just feel like you're not here for the wedding.
It seems like you're just here for Katie Reck. And she's like, I've
Laala's like, I've come to so many things already and it's only day two.
I do not like Brock. I just think he's he's such a side
he has such side piece energy. So this part was insane. So,
uh, Katie is in the room with with Kristen, right yeah, and
rock Hell knocks at the door and she's like, can I come in and
need to talk to you guys? Can I just come in for a minute?
And then it's like that answertain point and I don't even need to sit
down you guys, just let me in. I just need to tell you
something. She's such a cunt. I'm sorry, but she is. I
wrote down cut too. Oh my god. See this is why we're friends.
Because I was never going to tell you that. I was way too
scared to say the word too. I was scared, like you'd be like,
then you make us like she's a she's down. I wrote down cunt,
I hate her, and then I just wrote no, no, no,
no no, and the hat no no, no, no, no
big dumb hat. Okay, you guys, so here's the thing. You're
not allowed to be in the preferred area. Okay, because that's my friend,
that's my friend Shena's area, and you're not allowed anywhere within one hundred
feet of that area. Ps. They just became friends. They weren't even
friends last season, shea and like, this is all just new bullshit.
Fuckina. Even if she ends up hitting Racquel, which we know she does
apparently well maybe according to Racquel, even if later she takes the correct side
of things, why are you even friends with Roquel? Oh exactly exactly.
She No, Sina does not ever get to be the hero. And by
the way, punching somebody is not hero. This at all totally good point.
But and then when Roquel she goes, she's like, just to be
blunt. I guess Sheina just doesn't want you around. And then they're just
like, well, we're gonna do whatever we're gonna do. She's like,
okay, whatever, y'all are gonna just do it, Okay, bye.
Yeah, She's on a level I never knew. And then I thought,
maybe I want to know what you think of this at this point. Now
back to the group, everyone's drunk and fucked up, Yes, but you're
right about you You mentioned that one time, like how old are these people
that I don't think they're just drunk? I really and again I can't prove
this. I know for a fact they've done this before, but I think
there's a lot of molly. They're not just drinking. Yeah. I mean,
it's that's hard because it's it's a little bit it's a little i don't
know, hashtag triggering because some of these people have kids at home. And
I understand, like, okay, you're on a trip, but like,
do you have to be drunk the whole time? Right? I mean like
fucked up all of them, every last one of them. I mean we
had we had James sober for like five seconds and then you know, no
more. So okay, that's what it is. And then what about the
moment where Roquell hugs Ariana. I was like, what why why? I
mean, I'm not blaming Ariane, blaming Roquell. She knows what's happening,
right, just hugs her. You know, well, later she's going to
make out with Schwartz. Yeah, well yeah, we're gonna get to that.
No, but I'm saying she knows Raquel, I believe, was already
having this affair, and so she's still hugging the girlfriend, the very long
term serious girlfriend of the person she's having enough sir a sociopath. She likes
that with this, she is enjoying all of it. Like even when,
um so, I don't know if this happened right afterwards, maybe this might
be a tiny bit out of order. But when Shena is like, I
didn't even tell her to go, tell her that she can't she can't be
I was a joke, right, and then she went and did it.
But fuck it, I'm here for it. It's like, you're all you're
all horrible people, all of you really really bad. Okay, So then
the next morning, it's already they're already drunk. It feels like in the
morning before they even get on the stupid boat. And then the guys are
gonna go do their other little guys thing. I guess the bachelor party,
right, I get whatever, it's not. It can't. I bet you
a million dollars. It's not even the official bachelorette or bachelor party. You're
right, totally. It's just another thing they're doing. Sandoval's hat and glasses.
I just wrote unacceptable. I don't even have another word for it's just
unacceptable. Oh my god. I wrote down that Sandoval looks like he's in
an Andy Samberg music video, some kind of like Lonely Island, like Lonely
Island, which is yes, he's got these gaudy Chanel sunglasses, necklaces,
a tank top, a Panama hat and with his RADI. The glasses though,
are like, like, honestly something that Jo jaylo would be like,
those are a bit much, yes, And he thinks he's so funny.
Here's the other thing that made me so mad this thing. First of all,
rocke Hell thinks she's so funny and she's so dumb as fuck, Like
you can't be you can't be both. You can't be mean and and dumb.
Those are That's my thing. If you're gonna be mean, then be
la la. If you're gonna you know what I'm saying, Like you're gonna
be mean, then be hot and be La La. And if you're gonna
be dumb, then be roque hell from two seasons ago, where you're like,
at least you're like a sweet you weren't a terrible person. You cannot
be both. It is and Sandoval. I used to think, Okay,
well, maybe he's got a little sense of humor. Sometimes he tells these
little jokes. But when he's trying, he thinks it's so funny to be
in these like little bikini whatever, thong whatever he was in. M I'm
sorry. I'm just gonna say it looks like he has a small member.
Remember I didn't know what Johnson Johnson is the right whoa what? I didn't
get the whole Like all the guys are gonna wear little fung bikini because Sandoval
always wants to do that, because he wants so see guys dressed like that.
So they all just think, aren't we being wacky? Aren't we just
fucking crazy? But we find out in a couple of scenes, we find
out something kind of interesting about Sandoval, which we're going to talk about.
Um, okay, so they're doing this, they're all wasted. I wrote
again oh, here's the scene. This is it. We're there. So
they're talking about it, and Schwartz is like, oh, I feel I
feel funny. You even look at everyone's like, I feel weird? Can
I you know I'm still in married mode? Is it okay to look at
women? And and Sandoval says, well, Arianna, look at we look
at women together all the time and men, like he was letting us know
something. No judgment on that. Actually, I think it'd be great if
he just came out, because you know, Arianna, by the way,
is openly by. She's talks about it on the show, she talks about
it in her life like this is not something she's in any way ashamed of
or hiding. She has made it clear though that even though she's by does
not mean that she's Polly. Those are two different things, so it doesn't
mean she's an open relationship, but she is by. I think Sandoval is
too, And I think that was his way of saying it. Yeah.
I think he'd taken some ecstasy, so he got a little lucy, little
lucy goosey and he said it, Yeah, I agree, all good,
but we just he just moved a little higher up on the Kinsey scale,
Okay, but that's information. Yeah, I say that like a detective.
I just like wrote something down in my notes like, okay, So on
the boat, I had that Roquel flexus that she could have made Lala uninvited
catamaran, but she didn't want to sink to Lala's level. And it's like,
bitch, she didn't want to go. She definitely doesn't want to go.
Yeah, she's like that would give off Lala energy. Shut up.
And then also Schwartz pretending to think Rockell's hot was annoying to me too,
because it's we all. I well, I actually believe two things were happening.
I think that Schwartz and Rockhell did have that, not just the kiss,
but I think there was an interest there. And then just switched to
Sandaball. I'm not sure. I'm really not sure because I want and watch
what happens that gets addressed, but I like that. What did you think
of Laala sort of bonding with Ali about James's temper and kind of Lalla was
crying about it. I thought, well, here's the thing. I like
Laa because Laala sober so I was like, so she's actually I didn't think
I didn't feel that she was just trying to be dramatic. I felt like,
but here's the problem. It's just basically stating the obvious, like James
is acting like a drunk, you know, crackhead. So I don't think
that you saying like, I don't know, you might want to watch your
back a little. If she's with this guy, she knows all this,
you don't have to tell her. And I thought Ali was a real bitch
for going right back to James and telling, yeah, I forgot about that.
You're so right, Ali's I was trying to be a girl's girl.
She was trying to help you a little bit. Take those notes, put
him in your back pocket, and keep your mouth shut. Don't go back
to your stupid boyfriend, who you can clearly see is toxic, and go.
Yeah, she tried not to James. James like it's so verbally abusive.
I think he made her do it. At first, she was trying
to She's like, well, we were just talking. She didn't really say
it. He knew she had talked to Lalla, so he was like yelling
at her about it. And then finally I think he just got it out
of her. I don't think she went back. I don't think she was
trying to throw Lalla under the bus. I think she was just like scared
of James a little bit. Well, how would he know? I think
he didn't he see them talking. Oh they were on the catamaran. Oh
yeah, you're right. Maybe I guess you're right. Maybe he asked,
maybe there was a man. I don't know. I'm maybe he's like,
oh, would you talk to? Would you talk to? Would you do?
And I think she's a little bit scared of him. I didn't get
it. I didn't get those vibes. I got that she just kind of
wanted to bond with him and wanted to say like, oh, guess maybe
like this is what Lalla said, you know yeah, no either either way,
it wasn't great. But I could see myself in that position of like,
well, you know how like sometimes when somebody has a boyfriend or husband,
you know, I'm talking about you know what time up, and you
tell them something and you go like please don't please, just let this is
just our thing, and then they and then you run. You have dinner
with your friend and her husband and she's like, so, I'm sorry to
hear about your breakup with that writer. Yeah, like you look at your
friend, you're like, could you have not just I know it's your husband,
but like he doesn't give a shit about my life, right, my
life. I feel like I don't know what that has to do with this.
Maybe that was is that Lala should not have warned her about anything,
because like it's her own problem totally, and that is never going to be
You're always going to kill the messenger if she's really into him. She's never
going to be like, Okay, wow, I'm going to not tell anybody
that you said this, and then like later we'll see if you were right.
Yeah, she's going to assume, like I don't know, Laala is
probably a little jealous, and you know this is what she said, like
you want to assume the best out of your your boyfriend, right, but
he's so he's ridiculous, I mean, such a ridiculous He's crazy. I
mean, come on, it's just so little. It's just this tiny little
thing. He's like like a little like a Pomeranian, just running around constantly.
You know. He reminds me of like a British Andy Dick. Oh,
like a hot or Andy cute Andy Dick. Yes, but he has
an energy. Imagine Okay, well, now you've just given the worst thing
idea in the world, because imagine if Andy Dick had been hot, how
much worse he would have been, Like, imagine how much worse his life
because then he would have really felt entitled. Oh yeah, which is I
guess James, I mean I would still Okay, let me give you an
f Mary Kill. I know that's what we do on board, but James
Andy Dick Brock, Oh my god, I'll just start I sleep with James
Kill Andy Dick. You Mary Brock. Okay, yep, I done.
I mean that's that's too easy, too easy. And then we cut to
Lisa and Ken. No need to check in on the vander Pumps. They
are not really part of this story anymore. As far as I'm concerned,
you'd be on the show anymore. It's just like it should just be based
on a restaurant by Lisa Vanderpump. Done. They never need to be on
fun fact, something I saw and whispering, Um, Jason, I think
I've mentioned this, but so Lisa's daughter Pandora, I'd mentioned this. Her
husband Jason was my ex boyfriend's frat brother. And yes, my ex was
much younger, so he was. He was the same age. They were
in the frat together, okay, and he liked Jason that he went to
my ex, went to their wedding and liked them. And you know,
I told you that's how I met Lisa, because he tried to introduce me.
Yes, and Lisa was not very nice. She's like hello, like
it was. It was bizarre. But apparently Jason just got into a little
bit of trouble and I'm not sure there was a little bit of some sort
of it's all alleged, but some sort of accusation that he's been one of
those guys that's like, don't you know who I am? That kind of
guy? Oh God, just a little side note. I'll try to find
out more, all right. So jasp In talks like he is a corpse.
He is kind of like, I don't know, I've had a nurse
current. But he's also got a little bit he reminds me of like a
blonde Arthur. We've got all a little money. Well, if Arthur had
no charm at all. I told you last week that I met Ken at
the Vanderpump Dogs event. Would you like to take a picture, and I
was like, yes, would you like the whole Jiggy? Okay, I
don't think it was Jiggie. It was a different Pomeranian. But whatever it
was, I held it. I mean it didn't I have the photo.
Oh my god, he just looks and he's wearing a sun hat like.
I love the guy. I hope he stays with us as long as possible.
Why don't you put that picture on our because I look so. I
was going to, but I just look so. I look so unattractive of
that picture. But I will. I will suck it up. I will
suck it up for the cause. Okay, I'll put it on our thing.
Um anyway, I don't think we need to see them, and no
one really cares about like their stuff. Oh what is what are they going
to open this this venue? Or what do they do? Like we're not
We're way beyond that aspect of the show, I think. Okay, Oh
yeah for sure, Back to James is all hyped up. I didn't even
know what they're talking about. Work. Yeah, Greg, oh who cares?
Okay, let me ask you a question. I feel like you're gonna
say no, but I'm hoping you say Okay, so I've wanted to go.
I've I've not really been to Tom Tom. I want to go to
Shorts and Sandys because it's not far from me. And I know we're all
kind of boycotting, but could I just go and not leave a good tip?
No? But then the waiter gets fucked. What if I just didn't
pay for my drinks and only tipped my bartender and waiter so they get paid.
So you're talking about you're talking about Tom talking No, Tom Tom's old
news. The new one is over by UCB, really near me. They're
both near I'm kind of but it's both guys, both the Toms. Yes,
So there's Tom Tom and then there's Shorts and Sandies and that's the one
they opened with Greg. That's where they're testing out the lobster egg rolls U
and I want to go. I looked actually online. I'm like, oh,
it's reservation only and it's business casual. They're literally get in Los Angeles.
I mean, even even the like most popular paparazzi spots that you see
star even Nobu doesn't say that you can go to wear jeans. That fucking
Nobou. But now Schwartz and sandies are saying business. I mean, I'm
sure jeans are okay, but they're saying, don't you better look good?
But I kind of want to go because I kind of want to spy a
little bit because Schwartz apparently is always there. I want to kind of see
what's up. We'll do it, yeah, but we'll people get mad at
me, because I know we'll get mad at you. Only people will know
are people who are there, and then you'll be like, well, you're
there too, and just said it. I just said it out loud.
Okay, guys, I haven't decided yet, so I don't think anybody can.
Like I said, I'm just going to dine and ditch. I will
hate the establishment, okay, exactly, as long as you don't give them
any of your money, as long as just have the uber waiting outside and
then just like run out and just hop in order some lobster in my business
casual wear exactly. So James is doing the thing that was really what I
was saying at the beginning is when they're dumb, when they're mean and dumb,
and he thinks he's so funny. But so he's doing all these he's
doing impressions and stuff like, dude, you're not funny. Yeah, that's
what you were talking about. So he's mad that Lalla got involved in of
course he's saying like the meanest things and then love bombing Alley, which you
know immediately, I know had my issues. But I've never loved anyone as
much I love you, which he said to Roquel as well. And he
had a big old crush on Lala, and he loved Kristen. And it's
always the same shit. He's so full of shit. Okay, So now
we're at the white party, which what is that? Now they have a
white party. Yeah, and by the way, there were no black people
there, so it really was a white stay. Yeah, as white as
you can get. They even had some like racial issues on this show.
That's why Stops you got fired. But yet there why are there no people
of color on the show? On this in the group. That's a really
good point, I would say, that's an excellent That is something to ask
Lisa. I'm going to ask her. I don't know, I'm gonna just
text her, do you have what's up? Okay? So, so La
La, which I love this again too. I know she's not always been
a hero. But I like that she goes. She's like, I have
had enough of this. I'm gonna go see what Katie, you know,
right, So she goes and Sound and has dinner with them. I have
a hard time remembering Christina's name because she has been so uneventful on this show.
She's really worked herself into this cast. Nobody cares about her. Sorry,
I like different from christ Katie. This is not the same one that
was Like, that was Kristen. That was christ Okay, and she's gone.
She's long one. Yeah, she used to be with Sandabal, and
Sandabal cheated on her with Arianna and we found out later five billion people,
so shot. Why did she leave the show though we talked about that.
So Lisa just didn't like her. She was kind of grouped in with the
Stasi group of like, look, we're not having it. She was friends
with Stas when they apparently like trolled faith or was a woman of color on
the show and people were saying it was a racist. But Kristen was all
kinds of bad and Lisa wanted to get rid of her a million times.
Okay, she just didn't like her and she'll never be back. I don't
think, okay, um, okay, So then I just wrote Shena's voice
makes me want to quit America. Rockell is the dumbest troll I've ever seen,
so fucking dumb. Oh my god. When so Shena sees that,
she sees that the other girls La la and um whatever, she sees it,
she sees that they're at the also like white party adjacent having dinner,
and then rock Hell is just like, yeah, like they're like the Muppets,
like they're like that. Oh, this is the part. This is
the thing where she's wearing that weird outfit, the crazy sleeves and she's doing
the Muppets like, oh, that's what angered me beyond because she doesn't but
she did kill doesn't know who those muppets are because she knew who the old
she didn't know anything like that. Then she's doing a terrible impression because she
doesn't know what she's talking about. She's not funny. So she's mean and
dumb and not funny, and I'm just I've had it. Oh yeah,
it was terrible. Oh my god, I have so many more notes.
Okay, terrible, Yeah, so she's yeah, so then let's see I
have that Christina tells Lala and Katie. Oh okay, what about this part.
Christina's like, yeah, so like, by the way, well I
don't like to scroll either. Um, I don't like you know. I
feel bad telling you guys this. But I did go and talk to Shena.
Yeah, because she's a total kiss ask because she oh, she wants
us to be on the show. And she never really took she never She's
always been in the background and she but she's trying to get a storyline,
right, I get it. She wants to get paid. I got that.
But like I told her, she waited on me at sir one time.
No, I didn't know that. I want it long time. I
go, okay, so yeah, such a kiss ass. And then I
also got a little bit of Ariana here as well, because she was talking
shit about La La. She She's like, why isn't La La here?
Give it a rest, Let her live her fucking life. Yep. And
also, Katie is your business partner, yes, and for a long time,
your you know, your husband's or your boyfriend and her husband were like
besties and you had to hang out together. And she's never been nice to
Katie even now. I don't think she's nice to Katie. Why, I
don't know. I think they just wanted to do something because they saw all
this money that Tom Tom were big. They were trying to be smart.
They're like, well, we should get our name on something, and let's
brand something, and you know, Lisa vander Pump I think probably wanted some
action on that too. So I'm glad that they did it. And it's
not that they it's not that they fight now. I bet they've bonded,
I'm sure, but like, I feel like Katie has had to fight so
hard for Ariana's love and it just feels like a lot. Yeah, Okay,
I wrote China's evil, but I'm not sure exactly what she did in
this moment, oh trying to set again, getting Swartz to make out with.
Yeah, you skipped one part which I just think is worth mentioning,
which is that James now gets annoyed at Ali because he's like drunk and going,
remember remember our spinning thing and Ali's like, no, not really and
he's like what yeah, and then he's like spinning thing. She's like not
really and he's like, ah, it's the thing where like I spin you
around. She's like Okay, it's like yeah, that thing, yeah,
but like some weird seventies like a spinning thing. Yeah, that was really
that. You're right, there's not there's not heroes because I was getting so
agitated with Shena again, like at one time she was friends with Katie.
What good does it? What what does it help her to be such an
asshole to make another woman who was just who was still legally married to this
guy like again maybe terrible and they've been obviously trying to get along and so
to to like try to throw fire into this situation to just try to make
get terrible and like, bitch, you're the one getting married, Like,
just be happy you're getting married. You found the love of your life in
your man, bun guy, why do you have to fuck up somebody else's
life? Who didn't she didn't hurt you. It's so gross, even if
some at one point maybe Katie was mean, a little mean whatever, but
this was seasons ago and it wasn't even close to on a level it would
be like and maybe Katie said this after you know, she had a really
sad, terrible divorce break up with Shay and he was an addict and he
had to go to read. It was a lot of really awful things that
like they both went through. It was so sad to watch, and it
would be like if Katie was like, well fuck it, they're not together
anymore, Shay go make out with Arianna. Do it? Do it?
Do it? Like it's just so mean. And by the way, again,
Arianna was not healthy. I wrote, she's being an asshole too,
she's laugh she's not sticking up for Katie. It's terrible. It was really
hard to watch. It just felt like watching some high school bullshit, way
worse. I mean, I went to a performing arts high school, so
you know, mine, we didn't really deal with this because there were no
straight guys. Really, there's one. There's like one strike. We all
fought over him. Okay, so are we at the part where everybody's yelling
at sandom at Schwartz that he can't be friends with um Yes, which is
yes, I got so mad about that. Well, I think you're a
little bit ahead. Okay, you're a little bit ahead because also Lala back
to that, she's still talking about the Dawn, the guy that she hooked
up with that right right right? What? Which? I think that was
just for a storyline for sure, and then Schwartz is creepily trying to say
hi because he doesn't want to be in a fight. He wants everyone to
like him. Remember when he's trying to peer around the corner and get over
and he's like can you cut and Katie at that's like, She's like,
he's in pest mode. Yea ignoram She's always called it pest mode. I
thought that should be the name of this episode, pest moode all right,
um, okay, so then yeah, Rocket also Schwartz, all right,
I just wrote these assholes because that's when they're all trying to get them to
hook up and say we're also saying, yeah, why are you friends with
kids? Sandoval's yelling about it. He's yelling like, don't be friends.
They're like why do you care? Something like that happened at some point,
and I was super annoyed that. I was so awful. They were just
yeah, they were so mad at him, and like, you go to
kape friend. Stop having a friendship with Katie. She's terrible. That's where
it was. And he even complace she's ridiculous. She brought you down,
Like, okay, so you thought that way the whole time, Like,
that's going to be real pleasant for her to watch back. I can guarantee
you this, if Schwartz, if Sandoval was not in Swarts' life, he
would still be with Katie. That was all Sandoval. He was the guy
in his ear all the time. What a downer. She sucks. I
hate her, hate being around her always. Sandoval, God, San Sandoval,
He's terrible. Then Rockel our little seaward. He and Roquel should be
together. They actually make a good couple. They won't last, but yes,
So then the kiss, which I do think was somewhat real. They're
all either they're all fucked up and whatever goes, or they're just like is
it just storyline stuff? That one seems more storyline, But according to Schwartz,
there was a little bit of that was real on that they wanted to
kiss, and then they did, and that's gonna be Did you watch watch
what Happens? No? So I okay, So I was watching it,
and because I had it recorded and then it didn't record the whole thing,
it recorded only like the first ten minutes. I want to hear. Well,
that's usually the best part. So you know, at Schwartz and then
it's John owen Low. That's Rob Blow's son, who was a Uber.
He's a super fan. That's a blow son. Yeah, I think yeah,
And he was good. He was really good. He wasn't like,
you know how Jerry O'Connell he's an Uber fan and Michael Rappaport and Jerry O'Connell
like who would have thunked? But they love Bravo and they're always and they're
really good at being on the show, right, But they're funny. This
guy was really serious, like he was really wanted to talk about shit and
like no jokes, which was fine. Maybe he was nervous, but he
was mad. He was mad at Schwartz. He kept trying to sort of
save him. He kept side eyeing him. He's like this. He was
not having it, which made me like him, So I guess either he
or Andy Cohen asked like, well, was the kiss worth it? And
Swartz says no. He said, at first I probably said yes, but
now I say no, because I really didn't want to quote hurt Katie.
Well, you didn't seem to ever care about hurting whether you hurt Katie.
No, you always hurt Katie. No. And why did he say,
oh, and like before, when I was first kind of doing, you
know, answering, doing a lot of interviews about this season, I told
everybody, yes, it was worth it. Well why I don't know?
I don't because because he never really stands on his own. Like he also
said that he's not a decoy because the timing he said he didn't know,
so Andy really drove that. He was like, Okay, when did you
know? And he's like, well, August, he goes, but you
said January, because he's getting him on all these lies because Swartz lies all
the time. He's like, well, August the year before is when I
thought that it was just a one night stand. I knew he'd hooked up
with her with Roquel Sandoval, but then it wasn't ntil January that I knew
it was a full on, an emotional and love affair. And Andy's like,
hmm, but wait a minute, okay, wait, hold on,
Like he keeps trying to pin him down, but he can't. So then
when he goes, well, why do you think Sandoval is doing this?
He's like, well, I don't know. Maybe it's like a midlife crisis.
He's thirty, how is he? How old is Sandoval. Well,
maybe he's forty. I don't know. Okay, So then he's saying,
then this is the biggest news that everybody saying that he's in love. He's
in love. Sandoval is in love. He's never been in love like this.
This is he's like so hyper focused on her, he's obsessed with her.
He's in love. And Anne Schwartz says, it's been an open secret
this whole time to everyone knew. Well, I don't think Rocket, I
don't think Ariana knew every He's saying that everybody knew this, so it shouldn't
be such a scandal, that's what he's saying. He's saying it was an
open secret everyone could tell. Well, then why didn't he break up with
Arianna? Then that's such a so Andy asked that too, and he said
it's because well, he was going to. Oh, Sandoval did the thing
that I hate so much for. He's like, listen, we're barely in
a relationship. We haven't we only have sex four time. Remember he even
said that my camera to her, we've only unsucks. We're not really together.
I've had that said to me, and he's gonna do it. She's
not going to be even surprised. It's basically over. So Schwartz is saying
Sandoval led to him too, and Schwartz believed it, so he's like,
okay, well I'll let you do it on your own, you know,
timeline, I guess okay, And then Andy asked him. There were so
many good questions or someone asked, was it okay by you, Schwartz that
Sandoval let you take so much shit? And Schwartz was like, no,
it wasn't okay. It was not cool. He kind of turns on Sandoval
a little bit, but not, you know, not a lot. But
he's sort of like, yeah, that kind of sucked. I kind of
took the brunt of it. And then Andy asked how is Sandoval doing.
He's like, he's a shell of a man. A lot of people I
don't understand why if he was, they were, he said, he said
two reasons. One the reunion, which everyone's talking about on whispering and stuff,
which I can't. I mean, it's going to be amazing. He
says. He just took everyone screaming on him for like five hours, and
and somebody said, well who took the brunt of it? Was it more
Sandabal or rock out and they're like, i'd say more sand a ball just
took everyone yelling, especially from and they're either like from who and they're like
Arianna, I mean she, He's like I've never seen anyway. He's like
it was beast mode, she unleashed and good for her. And then he's
also upset because the sales are down at their stupid new restaurant that I'm going
to dine and ditch at right well, good, yeah, and so he
was mad. Who's like someone said they were going to pour a beer on
his head and then Schwartz like basically turns to the camera like Ferris Bueller style
and was like, you guys, please like don't resort, like please don't
tag or you know, people are like writing graffiti like cheater and stuff on
the outside, which I do want to go see, and then people and
he's like, please just take a couple deep breaths. And then he immediately
shorts turns in and he goes, was out condescending. I don't want to
sound condescending. And Andy's like a little bit, yeah, oh my god,
that's funny. So Schwartz says he is mad at Tom. He is
mad, Okay, but you know, but he also he's like, but
I'll always love the guy. He's my best friend and business partner, and
you know, I'm going to have his back. What and how are things
between he and Katie? Now? Did they say? That? Was another
question? And then he says, he goes, I think we're pretty good
now, and then and Andy goes, no, you're not, because I
guess he'd either just talk to Katie or based on the reunion. But he's
like what and you there's this look of there's this sort of look of resolve
on Andy's face where he's like, this guy is just either so dumb or
he's just like just lying. He doesn't even know what to say anymore.
And then okay, So then John rob Lowe's kid asks, so he's like,
so you never covered for Sandoval, Like you just you're telling us that
you really didn't know and you didn't cover. And so Schwartz finally admits that
he covered a little bit. He knew a little bit, but like wanted
again Sandoval to do it on his own time. And then yeah, and
he said he would have made out with Roquel more if the cameras weren't there
at least he was being honest. So even though he knew that Sandoval that
his business partner was like in love with her. No, he says that
was before the kiss, was before he knew that. He was very clear
about that. According to him, they even went on a trip together.
They had gone on this trip he's some kind of Joe Sandoval. And then
Sandoval like invited Roquell on some trip they took. And I think this is
after everything came out, but they've been like they've been together a while because
he said dandy. He's like, well, how did Roquell even get there?
And he's like he Sandoval sneaks her into places and he's like, what
do you mean, like in a suitcase? Like what do you mean?
The reunion? Which I get. I don't know how many episodes we are
till then I should know that, but it's going to be insane. I
feel like Vanderpump Rules has so many episodes though, like, do you think
it's going to be sixteen episodes? We're only on nine. I don't know
how many he's gonna be. I mean, I'm loving every second. I
thought this past episode was amazing. And did you notice Schwartz was still wearing
his wedding ring on watch what happens? I thought that was interesting. Oh
no, I mean looks like unless he moved the finger, unless he's married
to someone else. Now told us he's somehow Mary Gina Rock didn't work out.
That'll be for next season though that they're like that, look, there's
too much. People can't keep up with this. So that's where we are.
And that was the other thing when Andy asked, he was like,
why didn't Sandoval if he knew so early, if this affair was going on
so long, why didn't he just break up with Arianna? Why didn't he
just tell her? And apparently he wanted to wait until after the reunion.
Oh my god, so he was just gonna pretend like everything was fine.
I just it is mind blowing. And there's some every time we talk about
the show, we do like a recap, but there's so many other behind
the scenes and people are really talking about the whole like, wow, what
is tom What is Sandoval saying when he says we check out guys together?
Like do you swing to you again? We're not judging, but like,
what's going on? What was happening here? Right? What was this right?
By the way. I did reach out to Randall Emmett for real,
no joke. I think I told you I was going to because I do
know him. I did know him back in the day, right, don't
know. I haven't talked to him in a very long time. Um.
I reached out to see if he wanted to like give a sunny t or
tell, you know, tell his side of the story, even though he's
not a great guy. He didn't see it. I can go through his
office if you want. But I don't think people are claming. I said
this to a friend who loves vander Pump and they were like, I wouldn't
flex that. I wouldn't have randol on. Yeah, probably not. But
you know we are having you know, finally, you guys, we got
t you know. I know it's a little he's got some stuff to say,
and he's our friend now. He's like really good friends with Stephanie All.
Yeah, we're really really close. He does he think my name is?
He thinks my name is Ceci. Oh my god, it's so funny.
So I talked to him over Instagram, but like voice Instagram, it
was very exciting. He's really really nice. We were just talking about the
show, and he was referring to Cecily as Cecy after I said, oh,
yeah, yeah, well when we record with Cecily, and he was
like yeah, totally, Like so Cecy is. I really love what Ceci
had to say. And I was like, okay, I love it and
I'm a fan of his and I'm so glad that he's a fan of ass
and he's we are he is going to be on we think next week,
so we will that we'll have an extra will extra extra for you, right,
and you know who else were fans of Yeah, our Patreon subscribers very
much, So we shouldn't do them. Let's say hello to them in voices
I want to do? Do you do rockhell voice? Okay, and I'll
do or do you want to do Sheena? I mean they're both so terrible.
We don't want to do gentle, soothing voices at this point, Like
we just don't want to do Like how about James all right? I mean
he's kind of an asshole, but you know, I'm I don't know.
I mean, Lauren Bonds, why won't you do the dance with me?
You don't remember the dance? Christine Martin? You want to just spin.
You don't remember spinning our spinning thing. And Cassie Wadsworth and Tamma Adams,
we spin Megan's door. We spin. It's our thing. It's the thing
you don't remember. Okay, all right, Well I just have to tell
Lisa Vanna Palm. Okay, Well, then see you next Tuesday. Jenny
Hawden and Anne Yabro and jen Jane McMurray. Wh don't you go fuck off?
Then? Okay, Lalla, don't listen to Lalla. Jennifer Falls and
Sarah Baker and Jean Bolshape especially you you know better, a better Parker.
I cannot get over the fact that you don't remember the spin. Shelley Clavier.
I've had a little bit to drink, not so much. Mark got
washed. Sherry Shannon? Are you accusing me of being drunk? Well?
Do you sound like um? The Osbourne Shee Sharon Shannon and Sherry Singer and
Susannah it's not about the pasta. But it is about the pasta, you
guys, it is. And our friend Jamie Bell knows it's about She knows
what the pasta is. She's a spitfiresocial dot com it's a social media marketing
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even if it's not like a full on business and you're just trying to get
like you don't know how to get stuff going on TikTok and instead they know
what they're doing. Um, spitfiresocial dot com right, that's what I want
to spitfiresocial dot com. Go check them out. And then also, our
friend is Sean, who's awesome. He is doing a shout out this month
for the Rotary Rotary International, which is he It occurred to him that a
lot of pricks might have lost a little faith in humanity after watching so much
you know reality TV. Well, Rotary is an international service organization and they
are filled with people from your neighbors to your clergyman, all true clergyman.
Go to Rotary dot org find a local club that fits you and make a
difference to people, you know what I mean. Yeah, it's a good
club. It's a lot different than it used to be and they do a
lot of good work in the world. Yeah, okay, you guys,
thank you for being here. We appreciate you. Yep. And we will
see you for Love is Blind, which we're covering. We'll see you for
episode two of Love is Blind next week, and for Tino, a little
bit of Tino. And we're sorry we said the C word. Okay,
we love you. Bye bye.