Chun chu Un dun or dung tstry that shot my ball. It is true.
Think big enough for the two of the inner world, where one man's
truth is another man's legend. Dune, Dune, Dune. I got six
bullets and they all have knowledge on them. I'm gonna shoot them right between
your mysterious eyes. Only one man has the courage to stand up for what's
right. My name, well, my name is David Flora, and I'm
was plucky sidekick Dave Stack. Oh oh, and I reckon this here town.
It's called photos. Ye, welcome to the wild West of mystery.
That's right. Facts don't go around here, savy. Why Johnny Ringo look
like someone just crossed over your grave. You know, that's an interesting history
to that belief. It's a superstition. Oh man, welcome, Welcome to
the Photos podcast. Areas we've got We've got six shooters of goodness here for
you. Go right at the unknown. Oh yeah, I'll bust in that
saloon exactly. And all of a sudden, the guy playing the jingle JANGLEU
piano's gonna stop the piani and we're gonna take the drunken idiot of misunderstanding and
slide them down the bar through everybody's drinks. Yeah, we're all gonna catch
We're all gonna catch the clap of understanding from the hookers in the bathroom.
Get the doctor, Hey, doc at the clap of knowledge again. Well,
uh, we're continuing our flawless takeoff of of podcast starts here for you.
We're so good at this. Hope everybody's doing. Okay, good show
for you, lined up. Yeah, we're excited about this. This one's
an interesting subject. Here it is, and we have we've decided to pack
up our mystery machine and take a quick flight to a Souerica in Peru.
Nice. I was gonna say, no lepre cons this episode. We are.
We're gonna be talking about Nas Colligns. You guys, Nas Colligns.
This is something that that is out there in the world. It's it's not
completely unknown or foreign to a lot of people. A lot of people may
have heard of that. Uh, some of you may not have. H
So that's what that's what we're talking about it tonight. They're real interesting.
They're really interesting culturally, they're interesting archaeologically, they're interesting, and they this
is one of those uh, those fun things that it shows up in other
arguments, It shows up in ufology, it shows up in alternate histories,
fingerprints of the gods type stuff, and uh, and so it's it's good.
This is in in just on its own. This ain't no sad dish
dog. It's a main course. This is a meal for a man or
a woman. It fills the plate, It feels, it fills you up,
it feels your soul. So we're gonna talk about what they are,
why maybe they are? Yeah, theories that people have who done made them?
Yeah, what's that all about? What's all this business with dirt pictures?
This episode on candy Chat, we're gonna talk about pictures made in pixie
sticks dust. You know, I'd be very interested if they made nestly lines.
I'm terrible. Oh you're just the worst her. She ain't got nothing
on them. Okay. Sometimes I just dumped my next quick out and I
just draw with it my finger. Oh that's really delicious. Nest quick lines,
earth quick lines like that. Y'all seen Wreck It, Ralph. There's
so much candy in that movie. Get you know, it's it's we're never
gonna get to the nasca lines. Now you're silveran. It's usually so fealthy,
but she was crowned. We get it, Sarah. We think you're
great. Jay's Louise past the pays. Oh my god. Well that's it
for Nascalize you guys later. Oh man, Yeah, candy trap is a
trap. Candy trap. Candy trap is a trap. It is what I
was gonna say about candy trap, so that that was a Freudian slip there,
because you're right, it is a candy trap, all right, you
guys, seriously. The Nascal Lines they're located in Perue, South America,
YEP. Associated with culture called the Nasca. There were people that lived there
um Perue, usually famous for the incons of civilization in the Andy's mouth.
Here's what they are. They're an elaborate system of gigantic geoglyphs that are dug
into a plateau in the Peruvian desert between the towns of Nasca and Palpa.
They've been dated to four hundred BC to six hundred and fifty CE. Yeah,
they think that they were made anywhere between that time period, that they're
older than six hundred years. If you can believe it, if you can,
if you can, let me dig that old crappy joke. Up the
plateau or Pompa is over fifty miles between the towns, and it makes a
nice little canvas to draw on. That's almost four hundred square miles. Yeah,
of dessert. Now it's not just any desert though. It's way up
there. Yeah yeah, this is a high desert in the Andes. The
elevations about twelve thousand, five hundred feet. Wow, that's that is up
there. That's that's around that's like top of Pike's Peak there. Yeah,
rosph. Wow. These geoglyphs contain hundreds of individual lines. There are geometric
figures, and there's distinct drawings of animals, both native and non native to
the area, which is really interesting. Yeah. Yeah. They were created
by scratching away the dark red volcanic pebbles that are on the surface to reveal
the pale yellow subsoil of sand and clay beneath them, which is pretty lucky
for them that they were that they just happened to live on the gigantic high
altitude act a sketch, Yeah, exactly on the surface. If you're if
you're just standing out amongst them, it just they appear as a shallow trenches
no more than six inches deep, but from the air and surrounding hilltops,
they form designs of things like birds, fish, there's a monkey, llama,
lizard, spider deserving a human figure. And that's that's just a name
a few. Yeah, there's geometric patterns as well. There's some criss crossing
lines. Yeah, there's things that don't necessarily line up as geometric or I
mean there's there's one. Look the candelabra. Oh yeah, you know,
it's it's kind of something that looks kind of like a Poseidon's trident or something.
Yeah, yeah, it's it's a design, it's a it's obviously you
know, they tried to do a thing, but what the thing is,
who knows. Yeah. Uh. And and you know what else is I
think really interesting is meteorologically, it's it's anywhere else on Earth and these things
would have just been buried lost. Yeah, it's just that they're they're just
there's so little going on up there as far as rain events. There's no
huge wind that's that's redepositing this soil. So I mean, it's it's amazing
that that they that they've existed. Yeah, it's it's one of the driest
places on Earth. In fact, they only get about twenty minutes of rainfall
a year. And with the with the darker stones absorbing the heat from the
sun, they kind of created a buffer layer of heat radiation just above the
surface, which texts the surface from wind. So there's like this this layer
of heat that nothing can get down to, so that that leaves things untouched
on there. And also the surface has a high amount of lime, which
hardens when when there's either do or they get, you know, just the
smallest amount of rain or anything, it'll harden and kind of glue the rocks
in place. So because of this stable climate and all this stuff that's going
on with that, those lines have been well preserved. Every time it rains,
it just gets harder, just like life, where yeah, we're going
to get the girl alone, like like we're I don't know why we're so
into these like tough guy voices. Yeah, it's old West and film,
no air. It's time. So just to put things in a little bit
of perspective for you, they have an image of a condor that's been carved
in there that's uh four hundred and forty feet long, So imagine something that
two hundred and twenty feet, now double it, just to put that into
some perspective. Thanks, you know that you know that thing that's one hundred
and ten feet lay four of them end to end? My god, you
know that thing that's four feet long? Yeah? How about one hundred and
ten of them? Oh my god. Yeah, you had to do the
math for a second one hundred times. Right. There's a monkey on there
that's three hundred and ten feet by one hundred and ninety feet. Whoa big
monkey. And there's a human shape one of them that's one hundred and four
feet long. So this is what is what we're talking about. These things
are freaking huge. Yeah, they're gigantic. A little bit about the history
of them. There was a Peruvian archaeologist named Torribio Sespe who first brought them
to light in the early thirties. He spotted them while he's walking around the
surrounding footheels. The full extent of them, though, wasn't apparent until the
late thirties with the improvement of flight. Yeah, which makes a big difference.
Yeah, I'm gonna kill this. I'm gonna kill something right now.
Early in the podcast, you hear this phrase over and over. Oh,
these things were made that could only have been seen from from from aircraft from
above. Right, That's not that's just patently not true. Uh, these
these things are were visible. There's other hills in the area. There there
are places from which these could be seen and more importantly planned. And so
I just want to just want to put that out there right off the bat,
that these are not invisible unless you're flying over them, right. I
mean this, this Taribio guy was was walking in the hills that was surrounding
them, and that's and he saw them. Yeah, you can. You
can see them from the hills. They may not be full on spectacular like
you would get from the air, but they are visible. There was a
historian named Paul Kosok who was an American. He gets credit for really studying
them in the early forties. And then shortly shortly after he started studying them,
he met a German mathematician named Maria Reich who he challenged to study the
lines with him. Now, a sweet piece of irony on her name is
Maria Reich. She was in Peru because she left Germany to avoid the Nazi
Party. She didn't like what was happening with the country. She got out
of their way ahead of time. It took a nannying job. She was
she was a student at the University of Hamburg. Really smart, very you
know, she just very driven. But she she did not like what was
happening politically in her country, even though her last name was Reich, which
was kind of interesting. And that's actually how she found herself in Peru.
She took a nannying job with a family that had lived there, and she
kind of set up shop doing translation work and things like that. So they
they've got very fortunate to have this this very well educated and very focused woman
show up. Yeah, and then when those two meet and she immediately becomes
enthralled with these these lines. What they mean is stuff. So by nineteen
four five, she had moved to the town of Nasca so she could be
closer to the lines and actually devote more time to it. And when I
say devote more time to it, I mean she devoted the rest of her
life to their study. Yeah, until her death in nineteen ninety eight.
She lived there and studied those lines. Fun fact about her life, so
part of studying the lines is that she wanted to to preserve them, so
she was going to kind of clean them, you know, make sure that
she So she bought brooms, and she actually gotten a little bit of trouble
for a while because the locals thought she was a witch because she was going
through so many brooms. She went through so many rooms. They were like,
oh it was me, yea, what is witch in Spanish? I
don't know? Crone podcast all right, time for you to go home.
Yeah, and it's embarrassing. I den Ecuador for a while and I my
Spanish is non existent? Did you know it at one time? No?
You know what I wasted my time? I studied French in high school and
college, which I don't want to go to France at all, no interest.
But their romance languages they were close enough sure that I could get through
the day, Like I would understand what people were saying to me approximately,
I could count out money, you know, things like that. But no,
no, no flu in Spanish speaker was I. Besides, I was
letting my hips do all my talking, and those hips don't lie. No,
we've established that. I hope I hope that we get enough fans that
someone's going to go through and see how many Shakira comments I make and like,
you know, like really to see how often that Shakira shows up in
this podcast about ghosts and spring Hill Jack's She's everywhere. What a delight,
good God, what nice young woman. What a what a gift, What
a gift that we've been given in Shakira, Humanity, ladies and gentlemen.
I'd like to welcome you to the South Central Eastern Baptist Church and today's sermons
entitled what a friend we have in Shakira, What a gift the Lord has
bestowed upon us in this gyrating siren, My soul have been saved by this
she wolf that's in the closet. Amen. But she wasn't a witch,
she wasn't a very dedicated researcher who did a lot of great work, really
established the foundational research on the Nasca lions. Yeah, because of her,
the lines were declared a UNESCO World Heritage Site in nineteen ninety five. And
everybody knows you do not with UNESCO, you don't. Dog researchers have been
able to replicate the lines accurately, though, with simple tools and just some
math and planning, they can they can make one of these things in a
couple of days. Yeah, yeah, it's not it's not hard to do.
No, it's kind of weird that that's something that can last a thousand
years. You know, if you if you're willing to take a two week
vacation, stop at the home depot on the way and boom, you just
you just pick up a dal rod and maybe some string and a good high
bristle quality broom. In twenty twelve, there were some Japanese researchers that opened
a new research center. Um, it sounds like you're setting up a pun
right now, kind of did nope? On And they actually set up a
center to study the lines for the next fifteen years. That's awesome. So
there's plenty of interest in there, keeping on, keeping on. And you
know, I almost wonder, because there's so many circumstances that contribute to them
still being around that we can study them now. I wonder if there weren't
more. I mean they're there are. I mean, there's mound builders in
North America. You know, there's there's huge other geoglyphs, you know,
going all the way up into to North America. Yeah, they have him
in Egypt, they have him in Malta. Uh, Mississippi. Yeah,
Mussissippi if they got some mound buildings, is that the big the big snake,
Yeah Yeah, and Chile, Bolivia that they're all over the place.
Yeah, And you wonder like, wow, how many more were there?
You know, these were things that were created in areas that do get substantial
rainfall or any any eroded for Mississippi, nast wall, the wallst thing you
can do is build something you want to last forever, unless that's a musclesipp
spirit. Let me tell you. Let me tell you something about My friend
goes by the name of big Money, and I got himself a couple of
opinions. I tell you, yeah, you ain't go ahead, You go
ahead, you build yourself a man. You see what big money has to
say, you get a pass from him, that man. Bif, however,
you don't get the thumbs up from big money gonna do that, they'd
got into straight oh shot go ribs. So that naturally leads us into nothing
has naturally led anywhere at least as to why these things were built. These
things, we've described them, We've tried to put them into context, tell
you what they look like. Why were they built though? What purpose do
they serve? Scratching out pictures in the desert. Well, because it's awesome.
It's like the world's greatest graffiti. Oh. If I had the ability
to inscribe a giant and dong on the moon that at the whole world had
to stare at, you best believe I would do it. There's no punishment
that you could give me that would keep me from doing that. Yeah,
but what if you didn't even know what the moon was? What if you
you had like stone tools and I, well, then I couldn't get to
the moon, all right. But if I didn't have the moon and I
had this this this alp, this high altitude, low rainfall plateau that has
like three inches of dark soil over like bright yellow soil, that's a gigantic
coloring book. I would not have made monkeys or hummingbirds. Oh yeah,
well, we'll see their priorities lay in a different, different reil. You
know what it's. It's different strokes for different folks. Cultural differences make the
world go round, And I, you know, I guess I can't blame
them for being primitive. They're not as advanced to hear in the in the
new millennium to realize that the ultimate human expression is a giant dong. The
real reason is unknown. Nobody really knows why these things were drawn into into
this desert. There's a slew of explanations that have come and gone, though.
Okay, for why these things are going back to Kosak and Rich,
they said it was related to astronomy, that the geoglyphs were like an observatory
pointing to spots on the horizon where celestial bodies rose are set, the equinoxes
and the solstices and things like that. It was hermaned once in the sixties
and then again and I think nineteen ninety that there was kind of insufficient evidence
for that. That would only work if they had established a single point of
perspective, like if there was if there was something in the in the middle,
because depending on where you stand and look, you know, they'll they'll
point to different areas, yea, so it can have a point to anything,
right, So so you would you would have to have some universally understood
point of perspective. So yeah, I can see why why you could say,
well, maybe maybe they knew that maybe for each creature it's different,
Yeah, and so maybe those are like highly accurate, But without knowing that
it's it's it's impossible to tell. They also said it could be constellations.
But then again, you get to a problem of you can look up in
the in the night sky and make out any shape in the stars. You
just find the stars that match what you're looking for and draw whatever shape you
want. So that kind of it's kind of like a good it's a good
swing, but maybe a swing a miss. Yeah, agreed, I get
I get that. They I mean they still defend to this day followers of
these guys and then their ideas, they still defend this idea. But yeah,
it's it's like not having a fixed point is really going to to hinder
that argument. It could, man, maybe maybe they found a fixed point
since then I don't know, but just plugging those glyphs into computer models and
throwing them on the night sky, they had random and mixed results from there,
and it doesn't doesn't quite match up. What else could it be?
Could have been walking paths or tracks for foot races. This one's interesting on
the surface. It kind of sounds lame to me that it's just Oh,
people just walked around them. Why would they walk around them? What purpose
did that serve and how do they why did they think that that that's what
it was. I mean, they have different ideas for why they would have
walked or run around them, or any stuff like that. One of the
most interest interesting things I've heard is that some people have taken a cross section
of the soil and found that under the soil where it has been scraped away,
the dirt is very impacted and very squished together, and then the soil
on either side of that is looser, much much looser. So it looks
like they have been impacted over and over and over in a way that kind
of lends itself to saying, yeah, people walked on this over and over
and over. They've compacted that soil down underneath there. Ultimately, why would
they do this? What would be the cause or why would people walk on
here? It could be could be a religious significance, could be a rite
of passage, something like that. I've even seen where someone said it could
be shamanistic in origin, that if you wanted to become a priest or a
shaman of the culture, you had to walk these paths, and then at
the end you had to know what shape you had walked. You had to
be able to tell, and that was a way of in essence, leaving
the body to be able to see what you know, what that was or
be able to tell. So if you could tell it correctly, then you
know, you progressed as a shaman or Yeah. I read something very very
similar to that. It was a theory that there was almost kind of a
very large equivalent of the rosary beads, that walking the pattern was as a
meditative exercise, and that people would would walk the pattern in order to show
piety or respect, but also as a as a meditative yeah, exactly,
as a way to occupy yourself while you focused within interesting so that, like
I said, on the surface, it seems seems kind of dumb. Oh
people just walking around these shapes, But then when it put it in context
like that, that does make a lot of sense. I think here's one
that was weird to me. Some people say it could have been used for
laying out threads for weaving. Now, apparently there were a culture that was
very big on on textiles. Yeah. They had all pacas, they got
cotton, yeah, and they practice mummification and they would wrap their dead in
these long wrappings. So so some people say that the textiles, the material
was laid out along these patterns depending on social class or significance, importance in
society, and you know the I guess the more important the glyph, then
maybe the more important person got the rappings at something like that? Does that
make I mean, I don't know, I mean, like they would lay
the yarn out, Yeah, isn't it. It's it's weird to think about
that way. Yeah, it sort of makes sense. But then again it's
kind of like why right, why this way? Yeah? Like that that
seems so overelaborate. Yeah, more elaborate than it should be in a way.
Yeah, And if I mean, I guess for some of the more
geometric patterns, maybe, but what is the what is gained by making a
hummingbird? Right? These are these are really irregular patterns, and so that
doesn't necessarily doesn't really even have a whale on there. I mean they have
Oh here's the thing that they have a spider. That's that's pretty famous.
Somebody some people have said that this spider is not native to this area.
The spider and and all of these figures, they're very artistically stylized, stylized
exactly now for somebody to say the spider is not native to this area.
They're saying, well, there's a type there's a type of spider that's in
the Amazonian rainforest that is exactly like this, has a small waist kind of
thing. It looks looks just like what they've drawn out here. So they're
saying, well, how did these people know about the spider that is very
hard to find in the Amazonian rainforest even today? And how to travel down
across the Andes down to Peru the coast. I don't know, And I
mean, what is like, to my mind, what is more likely that
they found some exceedingly rare brand of spider and did this, or that they
added a pair of legs to an ant Yeah, because everything else about this
thing is just screams AUNT all day. It's true. It's got what three
sections of body? Yeah, there's the head, thorax and abdomen weird and
and so it's and everything else about it just says AUNT. So I don't
know. And there's that that weird runoff of one leg, yeah, which
they are saying is the reproductive organ of the spider. It's a special,
special thing that's only found on this spider. Apparently it's it's back right leg
has this reproductive organ and it's microscopic, So how did they know that it
is? Okay, So the thread, the weaving thread, it's kind of
weird, kind of weird, but it's been put out there. The most
debated theory that's been put forth is by a Swiss author by the name of
Eric van Danikin, who I think we've mentioned before. Yeah, that sounds
familiar. I was just gonna say that that does sound familiar. He claims
that these things are runways for an ancient extraterrestrial airfield. Oh that's why we've
heard of him before, ancient aliens. Yeah, he wrote he wrote Chariots
of the Gods. Oh that's what I was thinking of up, Chariots of
the Gods. Guy, Yes, runways. Interesting. Interesting guy. He's
very much a proponent of the ancient alien conspiracy. Yeah. Yeah, well,
I mean I think the ancient alien theory. Yeah, I was gonna
say, I think they would call it a theory. What do you think
of them teaching theories as fact in schools? With this theory, it comes
up with a couple of snags here. First and foremost people make the argument
that if there are extraterrestrial that have mastered interstellar travel, how do they not
have a vertical takeoff and landing ability capability? You know what, I will
actually give you an answer to that question. Okay, they do, oh
but no, I mean, I'll say this from a fuel economy perspective.
It's important to know that. You know, it takes literally, so when
you when you launch a rocket into space, you have to get that rocket
going in excess of twenty thousand miles per hour in order to achieve orbit,
which is huge. That's a lot of speed. Functionally, and just because
this matters, like orbit is a function of speed. It means that you're
going so fast that you are falling towards the Earth because of gravity, but
the Earth is curving away from you, so you're constantly falling. And that's
how That's what orbit is. That's how that works. Yea. And in
order to land again, say take for example, the Space Shuttle. It
gets up to I think I want to say, it's like twenty five twenty
two or twenty five thousand miles per hour. It gets out there. But
if it wanted to, if we if we as a bunch of people wanted
to have it land just like a rocket. We can do that, but
you have to slow it down again. And this is your you know,
lowerth orbit. To slow yourself down requires exactly as much fuel as it took
to speed yourself up. Oh wow, And so what the way we've solved
this problem, because that means that now you have to take twice as much
fuel. We barely can get into orbit with the fuel we have. It's
it's not as energy efficient. In order to land for free without having to
spend fuel, we use the Earth's atmosphere to break. We use the friction
of the atmosphere to break, which is why we need the heat shield and
the tiles and everything. And so we just literally take a trip about three
quarters of the way around the planet just converting our kinetic energy into heat and
just burning off our speed and using the atmosphere to slow us down. Which
is why the Space Shuttle is a glider. It just glides in and it
lands. It has no breaks, it has no extra fuel, it has
no other options but to come in land. And the same thing with you
know, the Apollo capsules. Again, it used the atmosphere to slow itself
down. I mean it could have just dropped straight down wouldn't have worked out
for the crew. Yeah, but we use that that atmosphere to slow ourselves
down, So I will give that some some credibility because it is so much
more fuel efficient to land using the atmosphere as opposed to just dropping down.
True again, though, that is only if the extraterrestrials were using a fossil
fuel type propulsion system. True, right, um, And and I would
I mean I cannot believe I'm not really arguing on behalf of the agent aliens
guys. Oh, I like it, but because most people don't. But
consider again that any interstellar propulsion system and an interstellar I mean, like any
any propulsion system that operates in space almost guaranteed wouldn't operate in atmosphere and vice
versa. I mean, all of our jets work on burning the abundant oxygen
in the air. When our rockets go into space, we have to bring
oxygen with us to let them burn. So that's why you have things that
they are developing now, solar sales ion engines. Ion doesn't need to oxygen
to do that, right right, No, you're just you're just you're just
fishing or fusion engines. Right, Nope, they don't need it either,
and so they're working on those things. But and I you know, again,
since this is just nothing but supposition, you could say, oh,
but they're so good at it that they would work in the atmosphere. A
solar sale certainly isn't going to work in the atmosphere. The ion engines that
we've worked on wouldn't work in the atmosphere. They don't provide enough for us.
They provide an inordinate amount of thrust in a zero gravity environment. Yeah,
no friction. Yeah, but when you're yeah, when you're dealing with
an in atmosphere, there's a lot more things on deck. I'm just saying,
if you can't game what an what an alien civilization would have available,
it really could be that they are the greatest stellar voyagers in the universe.
But the engines that they're using to achieve that still are terrible at landing actually
on a planet, Which makes me think, well, what if they have
something they can manipulate electromagnetic force that you don't need to worry about any friction,
gravity, anything like that. Your plan off the magnetosphere that we have
around the planet anyway, right, electromagnetic energies everywhere, or they could found
a planet that's made entirely of peeps and they have the most efficient burning engines
in the world, and that's what they use. Oh, I thought you
were going to say that they didn't have to worry about landing because they just
come through the atmosphere and let it drop and then bounce safely. Yeah,
that too, you know, like you that's the thing about the next planet,
bouncer Castle, you know that that's those kind of arguments. They don't
really hold any water in either direction, because you're like, oh, well,
what would the aliens act hold vodka? Pretty well? Did you hear
that? No, you soak a peep in vodka for a few days,
and then you've got a nice tasty adult Easter treat, is it? I
don't want to eat a regular peep, and I don't want I'm not a
big peep fan, so I'm not gonna be trying that. No, But
I'm glad that we discussed this because I read a lot of Neil de grass
Tyson and he's taught me a ton about space and rockets. Yeah, and
I'm really glad that I just got to talk about that. The peep idea,
thanks, mel Evans. That comes comes to you straight from our friend
Millet. She a peepe believer. Well she she knows the recipe to soak
peeps and gummy bears in champagne. Apparently, no way. Yeah, listen
to an hour with your ex. I know that they talk about that,
but yeah, I was gonna say I do all the time, and I've
not heard it. We're friends and it's come up, so well, we're
just gonna have to have a podcast, dinner party, record the whole thing.
You know what, We're gonna have to have what candy chat with special
guests, mel Evans. Now I know what you're thinking. Candies for kids.
We've got some after hours treats that will really make your adult socks roll
up and down. Not too late, I like to get up and watch
Good Morning America. Well, you're gonna have a screaming headache and you're gonna
spend all night rolling around in your own sick tabitha. Because if there's one
thing I know, once you smell liquor, you can't stop. Is that
what happens Betty? Because I thought that was you and you're talking to a
mirror. Snapburn, snap burn, Oh, we do have fun. Oh
it's so great. Your hair looks great. I just love that dress you're
wearing. I cannot wait to get drunk from candy Candy Chat. We have
spawned a genuine monster. It is. It's a hydra with Betty and Tabitha.
I feel like Betty's got better burns than Tabitha, for sure, but
I don't. They both just get so angry. You know what else is
bad for the landing. There's the soil is so soft, it would make
for a good landing pad, landing strip. It's also this This is something
that people have argued. Uh. They say, well, it's in the
middle of nowhere, why would they want to go there? Blah blah.
You know what, Um, the majority of Northern Africa vast desert. Yep,
they're figuring out that that used to be one of the most lush places
on Earth, with a ton of water and rainforest. Yeah, it's it's
a huge, huge thing that wasn't always the way we see it, and
that's that's hard for us to see, you know. And it's the same
thing with the quote unquote runways. There's a bias in your mind to see
things the way you're accustomed to and so and so from the air. Yeah,
those look exactly like intersecting runways. They do. Yeah, but that
doesn't mean they were. It doesn't mean that you you gin up a concoction
of of Oh, and I'm going to further enforce my own bias by saying,
oh, yeah, No, it's it's a runway for a futuristic alien
race that lands their aircraft in the way that I'm comfortable with. Right,
and I could board it myself and right as long as I paid delta.
Yeah, exactly. And so it's in the same thing when you talk about
these huge differences in time, you know, climates change and and drastically sometimes.
Yeah, um, it would seem that for the last you know,
two thousand plus years, the climate has changed very little in northern Peru.
Right, But you know that's again, why would they go there. I
don't know they're aliens. Maybe that's not something that's an argument. Yeah,
maybe they're actually robotic alpacas and they love it. They're like, oh,
thank god, we found it. Look, we found these weird pack is
shaped squishy things. Let's land there. I don't know that's why, you
just it's it's an asinine thing to get into, right, right, All
that is the explanation to you are though, the one that's that's popular these
days France is that they were religious in nature. These things are the natives
were dependent on water from the Andes, and they drew these geoglyphs to encourage
their deities to produce water for them or to make water available. At least
the paths could have led to spots to worship the deities in the symbols themselves.
So could have been because a lot of these either face the Andes are
very clear from from the Andes. They think that since that's where they got
their water source to begin with, the things that they drew encouraged the water
to come from them. I don't think it worked out very well. But
you know what though, I mean, if you I would always go with
religion. You want to get a lot of people to put a lot of
effort into a thing that no one's gonna understand. Again, Yeah, the
shamanistic walking rituals that we just discussed, you know, that's that's a pretty
good, pretty good call. Now here's here's some fun stuff that I read.
There are local legends that spoke of an ancient culture that was older than
the Nasca people, which is to us two thousand years right, and older
than the Incan cultures as well. These legends included a white robed, bearded
white man who was kind of like a scientist healer figure that went around and
taught people all kinds of technology and healed upon touch and preached to people to
to be kind to each other and to not fight, to not cause injury
at all, either mentally or physically. And they spoke of an old civilization
of white men with auburn hair, and also a flood myth around the time.
Huh. And they're saying the lines could have been older than than the
Nasca and part of this civilization and maybe they either continued, you know,
the through tradition that they didn't know why they were drawing these lines, they
just did it because that's what they'd always done, or they were there and
they just left him alone or preserved them. Could have been a drawn as
a memorial to the flood. Yeah, that's true. I mean, there
is no arguing we're gonna have to do flood myth. Oh yeah, there's
no getting away with that. It's it's like it's like gangering at this point.
Yeah, like that. There was an American airline executive named Jim Woodman
who proposed a theory that the NASCA used hot air balloons to make these lines.
He was actually able to replicate a balloon from available materials and technology that
they believed the NASCA had at the time, and he actually flew in this
balloon for a little while. But yeah, he put together the material and
basically just dug a big pit, fire pit and filled the balloon with with
that hot air and flew for a while in it. He was successful.
It was that doesn't matter in the context of why these were built, but
he showed that, you know, that's a possibility of maybe why they could
have been seen from the air, or how they could have been seen from
the air. Yeah, I mean I'll take that. I mean, yeah,
I give full credit to that because yeah, exactly, Yeah, you
can prove that it's possible, then why not. Why not here's a fun
when they could be markers for subterranean waterflow. The trapezoids, they say,
show how broad the streams of water were under the ground. Zigzags show where
they ended, lines show the directions the water was flown in. So it's
like underground rivers and things like that, which would have been very important to
them seeing as how they lived. These civilizations, they lived next to the
rivers in the area. Everybody has to right this, Yeah, and this
desert is between two rivers. It's it's basically the valley between the rivers,
and these civilizations lived along the river banks and stuff. Well, if they
wanted more water, then why not look underground? You know, they could
have looked for underground sources or whatever they could have. The basic thing is
they're using the premise of dousing to to find the water sources, and that
they drew these lines out of that. That's one of the more kind of
out there explanations of why they were drawn. I mean, which, again,
to these people, water pretty big deal, A big deal. Yep.
So that's those are some of the explanations of why they're out there.
None of them are spot on, one hundred percent full proof. None of
them are completely dumb, I don't think. I mean, even like like
you just discussed with the extraterrestrials and the landing strips, like discussing that in
the way that we did, even puts them up there at least with the
textile patterns. Yea in my mind, right, Yeah, I'll give you
that. Yeah. So, ultimately nobody knows what these things are for.
The Nasca as a as a culture kind of died out, and they think
it may have been due to deforestation that they eventually the society. Yeah,
this is one of the few South American cultures that we cannot lay at the
feet of the conquistadors. These guys took themselves out of the equation. Yeah.
So, um, I don't know what did you? Uh, what's
your gut going with? Oh? Man, see, you know what I
am actually really I'm comfortable with a mystery like well, just like go Beckley
Teppire, We're comfortable with that being a mystery too. But but if I
got a pick, yeah, if I gotta pick, who's your dark horse?
No, I'm going with the the I will be standing in the long
line of religious significance. Uh. Animal totems very popular in a lot of
other South American cultures. Sure, um, huge amounts of iconography used.
I go with that. I just go with religious significance with just be religious
as in, um, wanting help from the gods for the water or shamanistic,
I'd go shamanistic. I think I think shamanistic because if you needed to
track the water that's underground, you dig holes. And these people needed water.
If there is water there, they dig holes. And keep in mind,
these things are ridiculously well preserved, so well preserved that they've actually found
the steaks in some parts that were nailed into the ground to help them in
the creation of them. So if and and and these things again are they're
not even six inches deep, So if at any point anyone had dug a
hole to find water, it would be some evidence. Yeah, and there's
there's been no there's no shortage of people investigating this area. So I don't
I don't think the water thing holds because if you think there's water under your
feet and you get twenty minutes of rain a year, you're gonna make a
shovel. Yeah, that that's a fun idea using you know, the dowsing
idea and stuff. Yeah, but even and I was and if they were
dousing, you'd see a ton of holes. They have found some pottery that's
been broken along the sides of these things, and they're saying, well,
that's that maybe lending itself to the idea that people were traversing them on foot
and maybe just dropped a pot here or there. What evidence proves that they
were clumsy? I mean, I think I would have to go with with
the same front runner for what they could be. You know, people,
I like the idea of priests of the culture or the shaman of the culture
having to walk these as a as a ritual or a rite of passage for
themselves and then figuring out what image they just walked, right, I think
that's fun. That's fun. Yeah, So I don't know. I mean,
ultimately it's like a corn maze, but they didn't have corn maze.
They called it maze Amaze. Billy Mays here for amaze. May's amazing.
Hey, folks, you find it hard to find water in the desert.
Do you want to be accepted as one of the operational lines in your shamanistic
community? You need maze Maze by Billy Mays? All right, um,
sorry, boy, oh boy. Yeah, that's I mean, that's Nasca
lines in a huge geoglyphic nutshell, high altitude nutshell bill preserved. M hmmm.
That's a that's a classic mystery. I love to discuss that because I
think. I don't think anyone ever takes the time to just discuss the Nasca
lines. It's always just like this this look at that, right, yeah,
yeah, like people always just tack that onto their ancient aliens argument or
or mysteries of the world. Oh this is weird, and this is weird,
and that's weird. Yeahaska lines are weird. Moving on, Like,
I'm glad that we discussed that because it's a really good one and it's fun.
Yeah. If you guys got any thoughts on what you know, if
things jumping out to you, like, oh, is they're discussing this,
this sounds like it may be something like this, not like the jackass theories
that that they're throwing out there. Yeah, yeah, I send it to
us. And speaking of jackass theories, I'm not gonna lie to you.
There's a few stones we left unturned here. Yeah. Yeah, I mean,
and well, well many things things are are very incestuous, right,
I mean, in this podcast realm that we're living in, all the ice
creams mix them together, Yeah, exactly. There's thirty two flavors and you
can't pick any one of them out from you. It's it's just like the
biggest thirty two flavored Neapolitan ever. And you don't you can't even just dig
out the part you like, but you can't dig out some puns. Oh
lord, oh lord, sure due, all right, I'm ready, yeah
yeah, kick it off. Yeah all right, I'm yeah. I am
a tough guy. Well you've got you've gotten to go first, last couple
of times. Uh. It turns out that archaeologists in tennis See have uncovered
a very large number three that was previously covered by trees, and it's it's
it's it's ancient um. And below it was the inscription of the Intimidator,
and they realized that it was an ancient uh, an ancient, an ancient
site. Uh. And clearly someone could see the future um recognizing the accomplishments
of Dale Earnhart. It's called the NASCAR lines. I'm impressed that you came
out with intimidator. Yeah, oh man, that's good. That lends itself
to the theory that it was just a race track. Yeah, that's right.
Of the gods of which Dale Earnhart is one, and he came amongst
man and he taught us how to fucking rock. Never forget number three it's
right, And then he left, and what are we stuck with? Junior
Bob in Labonte no junior number eight? Oh yeah, in the Budweiser car.
Yeah no, just ask ask Hank Williams Junior how much the world likes
a junior? Do you? Hank Williams Junior, Thank you, You'll never
be your dad, And double fuck you to Hank Williams junior junior, who
is a real person peddling that bullshit? Wow? Really? Yeah? Not
even the third or a second. He probably goes by that, but he's
still junior junior junior. Oh wow, Yeah, that came from the heart
I heard, I felt. And he's not very busy. He might come
here and try to fight me over that. Also, I've I've osmost my
NASCAR knowledge from my parents. Nice, yeah, nice? All right,
what do you got for me? All right? I've got an ancient video
game console. Oh I love this called the Neo Geoglyph. Oh wow,
nothing's really expensive, isn't it? Like those Neo gio was like six hundred
bucks? Oh geez, I knew. I knew one friend that had it
and he played like there was a lizard game. They tried to have a
lizard as their their mascot, like their their Mario, their sonic, you
know, some lizard. I forget what it was, dude, I didn't.
I never knew anyone who had a Neo Geo. Your friend was like
loaded rich because that thing was like ridiculous. It was. But this isn't
the podcast where we talking about old video games. But well it could be.
I mean I had a friend also who had a sick of Saturn.
Oh. I had a roommate I had the Saturn and he even had like
a weird import Ram cartridge for the controller. No no, no, uh,
I just I thought they had replaceable God, you're right. I think
it's a dreamcast. I could be, but I don't think he had a
dreamcast. Is how is willing we are to get off the off the tracks
here? Robert Brathian Game of Thrones. I like that though. I like
the Neo Gio Glynnogio glyph. All right, all right, um, if
you're if you're in Peru and you're stopping by, you know, maybe wake
up and you step outside of your your your home on the high plateau and
you just fill your lungs with the ancient air of Peru and to wake up
in the morning. How about a nice steaming hot cup of nas cafe delicious.
Yeah, hot dry, that's right. You know what it does work
on top, you don't have to mix it with much water, all eat
underneath. Nice. Well, you know, March Madness just ended great.
It ended for me like a week ago. Well, great tournament. Yeah,
fun fun stuff going on. I've got a special basketball play that's drawn
up, okay, especially for this subject. Okay, It's called the Razzle
Daska Lines. Oh I love it. Does one guy just like flop down
on the floor and pretend to be a hummingbird. They they just keep walking
around in patterns. Oh yeah, intersecting trapezoids, and I like that's they
they do a full court trapezoid. Oh perfect, I like that. I
got. Uh it's not even a bonus one because it's not even a pun.
Okay, But since I was talking about NASCAR, there should be a
degrading sexual position called a rusty wallace. I actually just know those off the
top of my head. Oh I do too, somehow, I don't I
knowing it that I've ever known has cared about Nascar. Yeah, I knew
those things. Yeah, Sometimes I just sit and I get all Greg biffeled
well you okay, check you checkmated me? You got me all? I
checked you. I didn't checkmate you. You said you knew more, you
got more. I'm sure. No, that's it because I always I always
remember Bobby Labonte because for some reason, I always hear it like Hank Hill's
voice, Bobby Labonte. And I don't know why. I know Rusty Wallace
and I did not know that the Dale Earnhart there was a Dale Earnhardt Junior.
Oh you didn't know, although I kind of did because I originally wrote
number eight and then I looked it up to make sure I had the right
number. There's number three. Yeah, sorry, yeah, well yeah,
that's puns for you. And then it's just tricky, no get you look
out, plums will bite you. It's like your pit crew needs work.
I reckon, you need to shave a few seconds of your stop times.
You ain't seen enough checkered flags in your nay son. Dude, do you
know how much money we would make with a NASCAR themed Western? How would
that work? I don't care. People would watch this out of It all
right, starring Sarah Palin as a single mom out to make a living trying
to make her name on the track circuit, and Ted Nugent as the coach
with the brass Ball's right, damn it, Dixie, get your ass in
my office. I'm tired of you tear assing all over this track. It
ain't your personal playground. Mr. Yeah. And her name would be Dixie.
It's such a great, bad idea. Yeah. Oh, and Russia
Limbaugh as the league commissioner. Now you see you see see what I said
here. I've been saying this all season. You keep driving that way,
people are gonna get hurt, and no one's gonna stand for it. I
know I'm not. That's really good. That's a really good rest the ball.
Have you seen this? Have you seen this lately? You've seen this?
I'm I'm reading I'm reading directly right now from the New York Times.
Dixie Haystack is a menace to the motorsports industry. And I cannot have that
on my watch. New York Times said that I didn't say. Yeah.
Her her race car is called the barn Burner. Dick Cheney has her disapproving
father special appearance by Meat loves the Pitch. He's the pit crew chief.
Yeah. Who dies like in the Third Race to give everyone else a reason
to live. So well, now you don't have to see the movie.
We just gave it to Yeah. If any of you guys have the budget
to make that, I guess I guess it's yours. Although I am copyrighting
the ship out of Dixie Haystack. That's that's the best name ever. I
would love it if Dixie Haystacks did a duet with Dickie two. Oh god,
you know that country you rap? No, yeah, yeah, exactly.
Well, I mean we've already got what if you know. I'm just
trying to work to Rusty Wallace into it and I can't think of how something
something like you're all Greg Miffield, we refused to let this podcast there.
Oh, I guess so well, thanks for thanks for getting through that.
Uh yeah, Gauntlet, oh man, that was good though. That was
good. There was some fun facts and some facts that were fun, and
a whole lot of us dicking around. If if you got a subject you
want us to to blather skyde about, then uh go on and send it
to us on blurry photos dot org. Yeah, tell us what to do.
You can even you can even Facebook messages. You can YouTube messages.
Oh man, what else are we on? It doesn't matter. Oh you
can toward us. Oh that's right, Yeah you can. You can send
us, send us one of those towarts, which you can find us at
Blurry Underscore Photos on the twarters. We're also on iTunes. Yeah, find
us there, rat us. Yeah, we're we're on YouTube, Blurry Photos
podcast. That's where you can find us at. On there also ribe.
I'm gonna turn it. I'm gonna crowdsource this because I'm just I'm just not
done with it. What would you entitle our NASCAR themed movie? What the
wait? It's an old Western Nascar It's a it's a it's an old Western
Nascar movie. Sarah Plant Palin is Dixie Haystack, a single mom trying to
trying to get her life back together and make her dream come true. I'd
call it something like horsepower or oh or like frottled Oh dude, horsepower,
horse power? You like that's brilliant? All right? You okay? No
one send anything in. Sorry guys. Yeah, it was open and then
Dave closed it. Yeah, but if if you like us, send us
out there in the world by telling your friends just say, hey, uh,
those are these bumps. There's only these couple of clowns. Push it
on their Facebook, email them, tie them up and open up their computers
and make all them windows do stuff. Do it, you know, whatever,
whatever it takes, but we appreciate it, and thanks for listening.
Um, I don't think I have anything else for this one. This is
no. I think I think we've prattled on all right. Now you gotta
find something else to entertain yourself with. Sorry, guys, No, no
even just means you go back and listen to that episode you skip because you're
like, I'm not so sure I'm interested in. Go Beckley TEPPI what's gubb
boggle teep? Go checking yourself a favor? Yeah, huge one. Gosh.
All right, well now you see, people, I've been telling you
for months, but I'm David Stecco. For months I've been I've been I've
been telling you this and it's still true today. I'm David the Intimidator Flora
oh three tearing up. Yeah, when your fellow man says to you,
show me God, show me mercy, show me benevolence, show me kindness,
I point only to this picture I have on my wall of Shakira from
her nineteen ninety nine World Erotic Tour I had autographed because I was able to
get backstage passes by knowing trivia on a radio contest, Look to Shakira and
the Lord says it was good. Also, I've written some fan fiction about
number a woman named Shakira who joins the clergy. If you're interested, it's
enlightening. Stop that last one and I didn't work. I'll be the jedge
of that. Yeah, damn, yeah, that's true.