Welcome to Round four of the Parenting Roundabout podcasts for the week of June twelfth.
I'm Terry Morrow, and I'm here with Nicole Ritis Hello and Catherine Heleco.
Hello. As moms of teens and young adults, we've survived those little
kid days, yet we're still rethinking the decisions we've made all through our kids'
lives and worrying about what's going on right now. Today's Thursday, which means
it's time to give into our obsessing, and today we are obsessing about a
scene from the second to last episode of ted Lasso. Are people still obsessing
about ted Lasso now it's been a couple of weeks. Still shaking their fists
on Twitter or posting their favorite scenes on Twitter? Could be. But a
scene that has stuck in my mind was from the next to last episode,
Mom City, in which ted Lasso had a conversation with his mother in which
how can we say this? How can we describe this? For the our
g rated podcast, Katherine and Him loses some of its punch without yes,
without the f barm. But over the course of three seasons of ted Lasso,
we got to know some of the tragedies in Ted's life and some of
the things that have sort of caused him to be the dude he is.
And he has this scene where his mother has come to visit and he says
some things to her that I guess he has wanted to say for a long
time, but it's in the format of he says, thank you, mom
for doing such and such, and f you for doing this thing that messed
me up, and thank you for doing this, and f you for doing
that. And it made me think that are there some things I would have
liked to have a conversation like that with my mom about? Probably? Are
there things that my kids would want to have a conversation like that about with
me? I would love it if they would. They won't because because I
like I can think of lots of things I did that fed them up,
shall we say? Which was another theme of that episode. There was a
there's a poem about what your how your parents mess you up? I can
think of lots of things that mess them up. And when I bring it
up to them and they go, oh, no, that was fine.
I was glad. I was glad about that. That was fine. I
had no problem with that. Everything you did was perfect. It was fine,
It was fine, It was fine. It's like I know, it
wasn't all fine. Give me that thank you and f you right now,
come on, come on, come on. They will not give me the
not the satisfaction, it is not quite the right word, but the resolution,
the yea, the settling of scores. That will not happen. I
will just carry the guilt with me without having that cathartic moment. But Catherine,
you actually saw that scene and knew what happened before and after. Did
it resonate with you in any way? Um? I mean, I don't
know. Maybe I don't have the like, maybe I need some therapy to
kind of unpack wanting it all up, Yeah, to bring it all up,
all the things that you know. I mean, I I don't think
my parents left me up. I mean I think they did. They did
a good job, and I you know, had a good childhood and you
know, um, I'm sure there are things that I mean, obviously we
all you know, there's things that our parents did that you know, they
couldn't help. And that's just yes, because of the circumstances that you were
in and that they were in, and that they were raised in and everything
else. Um, So it's it's tough to say. And that goes for
us raising our kids too, right, I mean, yeah, I'm sure
that they're that there are you know, I mean I I certainly have I
have regrets and about I mean, this is this is one that my son
still brings up. So he you know, when my kids were before they
started school, they went to a childcare center, um, which you know,
basically by the time they're in the you know, three year old,
four year old classroom, it's basically it's preschool. But then it just isn't
is more than you know, two hours a day, so that it can
work for working people. Um. But so my one of my kids good
friends from when he was in preschool, UM, her mother, um took
a layoff package when she was a little kid, and so then switched her
to a preschool program instead of being a daycare. And to this day,
Michael will be like, well, you never sent me to preschool. I'm
like, yes, you were at preschool like ten times the amount as every
other kid, because you were there all day. They were going they were
going for two hours, three days a year or whatever. You were going
all day. That's on the list. Yeah, so yeah, thank you
for finding me such a nice facility to spend my time in. Right there
you go. Yeah, and my daughter will still you know, bring up
thank you for um taking good care of me when I'm sick of you for
not knowing that my appendix was bursting. Oh yeah, you had one of
those ary. Yeah, my son could totally do that, but he won't.
He's like not interested, not interested in recriminations. My children, they
will just go through their traumas and go, no, no, it's fine,
it's all good. And I mean I had I had a good childhood
and I really can't complain about anything. I was set up well for life.
But there are some some of my mom's particular anxieties and fears and phobias
did get passed down. You know. We talk about the anxiety gene that
I have somehow passed to my daughter through you know, nurture, not nature.
So you know, I don't know that I would want to have that
conversation with her necessarily if she were still alive, but I do think it
sometimes. How about ju Nicole feeling conversation to have? Well, I know
my son is very much you know, he tells the story over and over
again about how he came running in the house one day after playing outside and
to tell me that he broke his wrist. And I was it was the
end of the day and I was tired and I'd worked blah blah blah blah
blah, and I'm like, you didn't break it, you just rained it,
like, go put some ice on it. That was my like famous
last words, go put some ice on it, because then kind of like
just shake it off. Yeah, yeah, I just wrote some dirt on
it. Exactly, you'll live. So of course my husband comes home.
My son's in pain. My husband was like, why didn't you take an
urgent care? So they had the urgent care, and of course it's broken.
So I will never hear the end of that, much like Appendix Yes
and the styles, although I had the opposite situation because my son was going,
it's nothing, it's nothing, it's nothing, right up to the point
where he's going, oh my god. Yeah, I would say telling me
your stomach was rupturing, right yeah, no, no, um. And
I'm just really salty with my parents for yeah, raising me in a very
small, remote town in the middle of Yes, it definitely did not you
know, it's just too small, too too um insular. Yeah yeah not.
I am very much a big city person. I need options, I
need choices, I need diversity. So that did not I mean, it
did serve me well in the sense that I got the heck out as soon
as I could. I've never been back, so yeah, that's that was
definitely a place that I and they look back on it and they're like,
oh, it was so great. It was such a great place to raise
kids. And I'm like, take it from a kid, it wasn't.
It was not. You had fun because you got to like go to the
curling rink every weekend and curl and then have some you know, socialization time.
And yeah you had to lead to Australia. Yes, I literally did.
I bailed when I was sixteen and that was it. So yeah,
that's what I would That's my big grief. They meant well, but right
it really benefited them more than me, right, Yeah, they always mean
well, well, I guess not all of them. Yes, yeah,
anyway, that's my little my little spiel or our kids. One day take
us to chask for having talked about them on a podcast relentlessly exposed all their
foibles. To the general public. Anybody can listen to this. That's right,
Yes, too bad, But that's it for today's Round four. Right
never mind, never mind, we didn't mean any of that exactly. Asked
forward on to your Scammanda podcast right now. All righty, we'll tune in
tomorrow when we'll share our Roundabout roundup of things that we've been using or enjoying
lately that we think deserve a shout out. Find all our episodes at parenting
roundabout dot com and talk back on the comments there, my Facebook page,
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