The two cent stamp by Ellis Parker Butler. The house in Tenth Street where
Filo Gubb was doing a job of paper hanging when he made the happy error
of capturing the dynamiters while seeking the un burglars was the home of Aunt Martha
Turner, a member of the Ladies Temperance League of Riverbank. The members of
the Ladies Temperance League, and Aunt Martha Turner particularly, had recently begun a
movement to have City Attorney Mullen impeached and thrown out of office, for they
claimed that while he had been elected by the Prohibition Republican Party and had pledged
himself to close every saloon, he had not closed one single saloon. Aunt
Martha Turner and her associates believed this was because Attorney Mullen was himself a drinker
of beer, and it was to get proof of this that the hot headed
Ladies had engaged a youth named Slippery Williams to make a raid on his home.
Detective Gubb was, however, quite unconscious of all this when he proceeded
to the home of Aunt Martha to complete his work. There, he was
in an unhappy frame of mind, for he had in his pocket nothing but
one two cent stamp, and he had immediate need for one hundred dollars.
Mister Gubb had early that morning visited the home of mister Meadowbrook, from whom
he hoped to have news of Cyrilla. But the colored butler informed him that
mister Meadowbrook had been called to Chicago. He don't left wood. How some
deva said the butler that if you come and was willing to pay thirty cents,
you could have his telegraph what come from miss Cyrilla, And he left
this note for you what you can have, whether you pay or not.
Mister Gubb quite willingly gave the negro thirty cents, the very last money he
possessed, and read the telegram. It said, hope on hope ever have
given up wheat bread, corn bread, rye bread, homemade bread, baker's
bread, biscuit and rolls have lost six pounds more love to Gubby. This
would have sent mister Gubb to his work in a happy frame of mind,
had it not been for the note mister Meaderbrook had left. This note said,
called to Chicago suddenly, I must have one hundred dollars payment on account
of the gold stock immediately. Cannot let my daughter marry a man who puts
off paying for gold stock forever. Unless I hear from you with the money
tomorrow, all is over between us. Such a letter would have made any
lover, said mister Gubb. Had no idea where he could raise one hundred
dollars during the day, and he saw his promising romance cut short just when
Marilla was beginning to lose weight handsomely. The greeting he received when he reached
Aunt Martha Turner's was not of a sort to cheer him. Missus Turner met
him with a sour face. No, you can't go ahead with putting the
wallpaper on this kitchen ceiling today, mister Gubb, she said, I'd like
to if I could, said Filo Gubb wistfully. My financial condition ain't such
as to allow me to waste a day. I'm very low in a monetary
shape right now. Aunt Martha Turner seemed worried well. She said reluctantly.
I guess if that's the case, you might as well go ahead. I
expect I'll have to be out of the house most all day if you get
done before I get back. Lock the kitchen door and put the key behind
a shutter. She departed, and Philo Gubb set up his trestle, unrolled
and trimmed a strip of sealing paper, pasted it, and climbed his ladder.
At the top, he seated himself a moment and shook his head.
He sighed and picked up the paste covered strip of sealing paper, but before
he could get to his feet, the kitchen door opened, and Snooks Turner
put his head in cautiously. Say Gub, where's Aunt Martha, he asked
in a whisper. He's gone out, said Filo Gubb. She won't be
back for quite some time. I guess, snooksy good, said Snooks,
and he entered the kitchen. Some weeks before he had met Nan Kilfilian.
He was deeply in love with Nan, and Nan was a good girl,
although Aunt Martha Turner did not approve of her because she was hired girl to
city Attorney Mullen before she had met Snooks. Nan had done her best to
make something of Slippery Williams, who was courting her then, but that task
was beyond even NaN's powers. Snooks held a job on the Eagle as city
reporter with the dignified title of city editor, and he was making good.
He got the news. He seemed able to smell news. When there was
big news in the air, he would become uneasy and feel nervous. I
got the twitches again. He would say to the editor of the Eagle,
there's some big item around. I've got to get it, and he would
get it. She's gone out, has she said Snooks When he had entered
his aunt's kitchen and asked Philo Gub about Aunt Martha. That's good. I
wanted to see you on a matter of business, detective business. He put
his hand in his pocket and drew out a small roll of bills. He
was not the usually neat Snooks. One eye was blackened and one side of
his face was scratched. His clothes were badly torn and soiled. He looked
as if someone had tried to murder him. There, he said, holding
the bills up to Filo Gub. After counting them, there's twenty five dollars.
You take that and find out what I have done and what's the matter
with me and all about it? What do you want me to find out?
Asked mister Gubb, fondling the bills. If I knew I wouldn't ask
you, said Snooks, peevishly. I don't know what it is. I'd
go and find out myself. But I'm in jail. Where did you say
you? Was asked Filo gob in jail, said Snooks. I'm in jail
and I'm in bad. When the Marshal put me in last night, I
gave him my word i'd stay in all day today. And it ain't right
for me to be here now, dog gone you, snooks, He says,
you ain't got no consideration for me at all. Here. I figured
that there wouldn't be no wave of crime strike town for some days, and
I went and took the jail door down to the blacksmith to have a panel
put in where the one rusted out. And my wife made me promise to
drive out to the farm with her tomorrow. And now you come and spoil
everything. I got to stay in town and watch you go on, I
says, and take your drive. I'll stay in jail. I got a
strong imagination. I'll imagine there's a door. Honor Bright. He says,
yes, Honor Bright. I says, So he went, said Snooks,
and he's trusting me, and here I am you can see it wouldn't do
for me to be running all over town when by rights I'm locked and barred
and bolted in jail. I locked and barred and bolted in jail, and
well started on my way to the penitentiary as a burglar. As a burglar,
exclaimed Gub. That's it, said Snookes. I can't see headner tail
of it. You got to help me out, Gub, see if you
can make any sense of this. Last night I went out for a walk
with Nan. She's my girl, you know, and she's going to marry
me. Maybe she won't now, but she was going to. She works
for Mullen. We got back to Mullen's house about eleven o'clock and Missus Mullen
always locks the door at half past ten, whether Nan is in or not,
so being late, we had to ring the doorbell and mister Mullen came
to the door to let Nan in, and when he saw I was with
her, he shook hands with me and asked me to come in and have
a cigar and sit awhile. But I told him I had to hustle up
some news for today's paper, and he let me go. That's how pleasant
he was. So I went downtown. Then the first fellow I met was
Sammy Wilmerton, widow Wilmerton's boy asked Philo Gub exactly, said Snooks, feeling
his eye with his finger, and he says, Snooks, did you hear
what the Ladies Temperance League did last night? I hadn't heard. I heard
ma say, says Sammy. But don't say I told you. They got
up a petition to have city Attorney Mullen impeached by the city council. Well
that was news. I went into the Eagle's office and called up Mullen.
Hello, is that Attorney Mullen? I says yes. He says, well,
something happened last night. I says, and I'd like to see you
about it. How do you know what happened? He says, no matter.
I says, can I come up after half a minute. He says,
oh, yes, come up, come right away. I'll be waiting
for you. So I went. Nothing strange about that, said Philo Gubb,
shifting himself on the lane. So I went, continued Snooks. I
rang the doorbell, and the moment it rang, the door flew open,
and Bliff down came a bed blanket over me, and somebody grabbed me in
his arms and lugged me into the house. I guess it was a turning
Mullen. You know how big and husky he is. But I couldn't see
him. I couldn't see anything. Only every two seconds bump. He hit
me at my head through the blanket. That's how I got this eye.
And all the time he was talking to me mad as a hatter, and
I couldn't hear a word he said. But I could hear his wife screaming
at the top of the stairs, and I could hear Nan screaming, and
I heard a window go up. Stop that yelling, says Mullen in a
voice I could hear. And then he picked me up again and carried me
to the back door and opened it and threw me all the way down the
eight steps. I chucked off the blanket and I was going up the steps
again to show him he couldn't treat me that way, when Bing somebody next
door took a shot at me with the revolver. Thought I was a burglar,
I guess. I started to run for the back gate when Bing somebody
shot at me from the other house. What do you think of that?
For a few minutes, it sounded like the Battle of San Juan. And
I can't understand yet why I didn't suffer an awful loss of life. But
you didn't, asked Filo Gub No, sir ree, I made a dive
for the cellar door just as they got the range. I stayed in the
cellar way with the bullets pattering on it like hail, until the cop came.
Tim Fogerty was the cop. He ordered cease firing, and the shower
stopped, and I let him capture me. He took me to the calaboose,
and this morning early he had me before the judge and I'm held for
the grand jury and the charges burglary and pettit larceny. Now what is the
answer? Being pulled into a house and thrown out the other door? Isn't
burglary, said Filo gub Burglary is breaking in or breaking out? Maybe a
turney and mistook you for some one else. Mistook nothin, said Snooks.
He was in the court room this morning. He handed the case against me.
Who's that some one was climbing the back steps and Snooks made one dive
for the cellar door and slipped inside. He knew how to get out through
the cellar, for he was familiar with it. He did not wait now,
but opened the outside cellar door, and, after looking to see that
the way was clear, hurried back to jail. Filo Gubb did not have
time to descend from his ladder before the kitchen door opened. The visitor was
Policeman Fogerty. Mornin, he said, removing his hat and wiping the sweatband
with his red handkerchief. Don't ye get down, mister gubbsort, I want
but a word with ye. I seen Stooksy Turner here but a second ago
me lookin in at the windy an you at him conversin'. Maybe he was
speakin' to ye of his arrest. He was conversing with me of that occurrence,
said Philo gub He was consulting me in my professional capacity, and a
fine young lad he is, said Policeman Fogerty, reaching into his pocket.
I got the devil for arresting him. Twas that dark, ye see,
mister Gubb, I could not see who I was arrestin'. Maybe he was
consulting yee about getting clear of the charge against him. He retained my detecative
services, said Filo Gub. Poor young man, said Fogerty, I'll warrant
he has none too much money. Me heart bleeds for him. You'll have
no InVID trailin and shadow and another detective work to do on the case.
No doubt tis expensive work that I was thinkin. Maybe ye'd permit me to
contribute a five dollar bill for the work, for I'm that sad to have
had a hand and arrest in him. Foggerty held up the bill and Philo
Gubb took it. Contingent expenses are always numerously present in detecative operations, he
said. Right ye are, said Foggarty, And you'll remember, if any
one asks ye, that I expressed me contrition for a rest in Snooksy.
Whist, he said, putting his hand alongside his mouth and whispering. Some
one wanted me to search the house here to see did Snooksy have seven bottles
of beer and a silver beer opener in his room. Philo Gubb sat on
the ladder and contemplated the five dollar bill until he heard Fogerty returning. Hist
Foggerty said, I did not see him mind ye Foggerty slipped out of the
back door and was gone, and Filo Gubb, after a thoughtful moment,
decided that the five dollar bill was rightfully his and slipped it into his pocket.
To earn it, however, he must get to work on the case.
He raised the pasted strip of paper, but before he could place the
loose ends on the ceiling, some one tapped at the kitchen door. Come
in, he called, and the door opened. Slippery Williams glided into the
room, his crafty eyes sought finally, Oh, Gubbllo, Gubby, what
you doin up there? Where's miss Turner? He asked? Miss Turner is
out on business, I presume, said the correspondent school detective coldly, And
I am pursuing my professional duties in the detectting line. You are, hey,
said Slippery. Who you detecting for now? Snooks Turner said Philo Gub
I'm solving a case for him. Instantly, Slippery's manner changed from rough,
he became smooth from bold. He became cringing. Why I'm Snooky's friend,
he said? You know me and Snooksy was always chums, don't you,
Gubby, Yes, sir, I think a lot of snooksy, he says,
Slippery, you go up to my room and get me a bundle of
clean clothes. These are all torn and dirty, and well, I guess
I'll get him and get back snooks is waitin for me. He turned to
the hall, but Philo Gubb called him back. You can't go up there,
said Phile Gub from his ladder top. There's been enough folks up there
already. Who was up, asked Slippery hastily. Policeman Fogerty was, said
Filo Gub. What did he find up there, asked Slippery anxiously, nothing,
said Filo Gub. He told me he couldn't find seven bottles of beer
and a beer opener. Look here, said Slippery sweetly. If I gave
you five dollars to hire you to hunt for them, could you find them
seven bottles of beer and that beer opener for me? Straight detective work?
Could you? I could try to find them, said Filo Gub. Well
that's all I want, said Slippery. I don't want to do nothing with
them. All I want to know is where they are. Here's five dollars.
Filo Gub took the money, all right, said Slippery. Now you
find them. They're upstairs in missus Turner's bed, between the quilt and the
mattress. Go find them, Not until miss Turner comes home, said Filo
firmly. It's her house. Why you long legged stork, you said Slippery.
She knows I'm here for that beer she sent me. I thought you
said Snook sent you for his clothes, said Filo, Never you mind who
sent me for? What? Said Slippery angrily. You're a dandy detective,
ain't you sitting on top of a ladder and not letting a friend of Snook's
help him out. Say listen, Gubby, everybody's going to get into worse
trouble if I don't get away with that beer. Understand. Come on,
let me take it away when miss Turner comes back, said Filo Gubb.
A new knock on the door interrupted them, and Slippery glided to the cellar
door through which Snooks had so recently fled. The kitchen door opened to admit
Attorney Smith. He was a thin man, but intelligent, looking, as
thin men quite frequently are. Don't get down, mister Gubb, don't get
down, he said. I came in the back way hoping to find miss
Turner. She is not here. She's out, said Filo Gubb. Too
bad, said Attorney Smith. I wanted to see her about her nephew.
You have heard he is in jail. Why, yes, said Filo,
crossing one leg over the other. He hired me to do some detect ting.
I'm sort of in charge of that case. I'm just going to start
and looking it up. Attorney Smith took a turn to the end of the
room and back. He was known in Riverbank as the unsuccessful competitor against Attorney
Mullen for the city attorneyship, and was supposed to be the counselor of the
liquor interests. You have done nothing yet, he asked, suddenly stopping below
Filo Gubb's elevated seat. No, I'm just about beginning to commence, said
Filo. Then you know nothing regarding the articles young Turner is charged with stealing.
Well, maybe I do know something about that, said Filo. If
you mean seven bottles of beer and a beer opener, I do Where are
they? Asked Attorney Smith in the sharp tone he used in addressing a witness
for the other side when he was trying a case. I guess I've told
about all I'm going to tell about them, said Filo thoughtfully. I don't
want to be disobliging, mister Smith, but I look on them bottles of
beer as a clue, and that beer opener is a clue, and they're
about the only clue I've got. I got to save up my clues.
Are they in this house, asked mister Smith. Sharply, If they ain't,
they're somewheres else, said Filo. Mister Gubb, said mister Smith,
impressively. There are large interests at stake in this case, larger interests than
you can imagine. We are all interested at this moment in clearing your client
of the suspicion, which I hope is an unjust suspicion now resting over it
and upon him. I need not say what the interests are, but they
are very powerful. I feel confident that those interests could succeed in clearing Snook's
turner. Well. I guess if I was left alone long enough to get
down from this ladder, I could clear him myself. I didn't study in
the Rising Sun Detecative Agencies Correspondence School of Detecting for nothing, said Filo Gubb.
Snooks hired me, and he did well, said Attorney Smith, heartily.
I praise his acumen. I wonder if I might be permitted on behalf
of the powerful interests I represent to contribute to the expense of the work you
will do. I guess you might, said Philo Gubb, detecting runs into
money the interests I represent, said mister Smith, taking out his wallet,
will contribute ten dollars, and they did. They put a crisp ten dollar
bill in Philo Gubb's hands. And now, having shown our unity of interest
with him, young mister Turner, there can be no harm in telling us
where that beer is? Can there? He turned toward the kitchen door,
for Nan Kilpilian stood there. Her eyes were red and swollen. Attorney Smith
hastily excused himself and went away, and Nan came into the kitchen. Oh,
mister Gubb, she exclaimed, you will get Snooks out of jail,
won't you. It would break my heart if he was sent to the penitentiary.
And I know he has done nothing wrong. He is depending on you,
mister Gubb. I brought you ten dollars. It is all I have
left of last month's wages. But it will help a little, won't it?
Thank you? Said Filo Gubb, taking the money. I cannot estimate
in advance what the cost of his clearance will be. It may be more
and it may be less. It is a complicated case. I am just
about going to get down from this ladder and start working on it vigorously.
If you, he stopped, if you wish to help us in this case,
miss Kilfilly, And he said, will you go to the jail and
ask Snooks where is the beer and the beer opener? Where is her?
Face went white? What beer and what beer opener? She asked tensely.
Seven bottles and a beer opener, said Philo Gub. Oh, she moaned,
and he said he didn't do it. He swore he didn't do it.
Oh, Snooks, how could you? How could you? Now?
Don't you weep like that? Said Philo Gub soothingly. You go and ask
him. I'll have my things ready for my immediate departure on to the case
by the time you get back. Nan hurried away, and Philo Gub waited
only to count the money he had so far received. It amounted to fifty
five dollars. He slipped it into his pocket and stood up on the step
ladder. He had even proceeded so far as to put one foot on a
lower step. When Missus Wilmerton entered the kitchen, she was a stout woman,
and she was almost out of breath. She had to stand a minute
before she could speak. But as she stood, she made gestures with her
hands, as if that much of her delivery could be given at any rate,
and the words might catch up with their appropriate gestures if they could.
Mister Gubb, Mister Gubb, she gasped, Oh, this is terrible,
terrible, Miss Turner should never have dared it. Oh my breath? Do
you do you know where the beer is? I wouldn't advise you to take
beer for shortness of breath, said Philo Gub. Just rest a minute,
but guesped. Poor missus Wilmerton. I told miss Turner it was folly.
She's so stubborn. Ah, I thought I'd never get a full breath again
as long as I lived. How can we get rid of the beer?
There's plenty that want to take it, said mister Gubb. Attorney Smith.
Oh I knew it, I knew it, moaned Missus Wilmerton. He threatened
it threatened, what asked Filo Gub that he would find the beer in this
house, cried Missus Wilmerton. He threatened Aunt Martha that if she did not
give it to him freely, he would have it found here and make a
scandal. Beer hidden in between the quilt and the mattress of Aunt Martha's bed,
and she secretary of the Lady's Temperance League. It's awful. Martha is
so headstrong, she's getting herself in an awful fix. She never should have
had a thing to do with that slippery fellow. With Who with slippery Williams?
Asked Filo Gubb, intensely surprised Aunt Martha Turner. What did she have
to do with slippery Williams? Well, she had plenty and enough and more
than that to do with him, said Missus Wilmerton, angrily getting bottles of
beer in her bed and robbing houses at her time of life, and wanting
the ladies temperance lead to have a special meeting this morning to approve of burglary
and larceny at her age. Now, Missus Wilmerton, said Philo Gub from
the top of the ladder. I'd ought to warn you before you go any
farther that Snooks Turner has engaged me and my services to detect for him in
this burglar case. If Aunt Martha Turner burgled the burglary that Snooks is in
jail for, maybe you ought not to say anything about it to me.
I got to do what I can to free Snooksy, no matter who gets
into trouble, mister Gubb, exclaimed Missus Wilmerton. Suddenly, mister Gubb,
I'm not authorized to do so, but I'll warrant I'll get the other ladies
to authorize, or I'll know why. If I was to give you twenty
dollars on behalf of the Ladies Temperance League to help you get Snookie out of
jail, and Land only knows why he is in jail, would you be
so kind as to beg and plead with Snooxie to leave Attorney Mullin alone in
the eagle. After this, she held four or five dollars bills up to
Filo Gubb, and he took them. From what I saw of his eye,
said mister Gubb, I guess Snooks will be willing to leave Attorney alone
in every shape and form from now on. Now, maybe you can tell
me how Snooks got into this business. I haven't the slightest idea in the
world, said Missus Wilmerton. All I know about is Both Missus Wilmerton and
Philo Gubb turned their heads towards the door. The greater duskiness of the kitchen
was caused by the large form of City Attorney Mullen. He bowed ceremoniously to
Missus Wilmerton, who turned bright red with embarrassment, probably because of her part
in the efforts of the League to have mister Mullen impeached by the City council.
Attorney Mullen was not, however, embarrassed. I'm glad you are here,
Missus Wilmerton, he said, for I wish a witness. I do
not wish to have any stigma of bribery rest on me. I came here,
he continued, taking a leather purse from the inner pocket of his coat,
to give these twenty five dollars to mister Gubb. Mister Gubb, I
have just visited Snooks, so called Turner, at the jail. I went
there with the intention of bailing him out, pending the simple process of his
ultimate and speedy release from the charges against him. I am convinced that I
was wrong when I made the charge of burglary against him. I am convinced
that no burglary was ever committed on my premises, oh, exclaimed Missus Wilmerton.
Not even the seven bottles of beer and a beer opener, I suppose,
atturning, Mullen turned on her like a flash. What do you know
about beer and beer openers? He snapped. I may not know as much
as Detective Gub, but I know what I know, she answered, and
mister Mullen restrained himself sufficiently to hide the glare of hatred in his eyes by
turning to Filo Gubb exactly, he said, with forced calmness, And perhaps
I know more about them than mister Gubb knows. In fact, I do
know more about them. I know they are upstairs between a blanket and a
mattress. I know, Missus Wilmerton, he almost shouted, turning on her
with an accusing forefinger, that they were stolen from a house in this town
by some one representing the lady's temperance league. I know that burglary was committed
by, or at least at the behest of some one representing the Lady's Temperance
League. I know that if this matter is carried to the end, a
respectable old lady, a leader in the Ladies Temperance League, will go behind
bars, sentenced as a burglar. That's what I know. Oh my,
gasped missus Wilmerton and sank into a chair. Now, then, said Attorney
Mullen, turning to Filo Cub again and handing him the twenty five dollars.
I give you this money as my share of the fund that is to pay
you for the work you do for Snook's Turner. I make no request because
of the money it is yours. But if you love justice for Heaven's sake,
send word to him to come out of jail. Won't he come out,
asked Philo Gub. Puzzled, No, he won't, said Attorney Mullen.
I begged him too, but he said no, not until Philo Gub
gets to the bottom of this case. But should we, as citizens and
as members of the Prohibition Party, permit mister Gubb to land Aunt Martha Turner
in the calaboose? Well, if what I find out when I get down
from this ladder and start to work sends her there. I don't see that
I can help it, said Filo Gub. Detecative work is a science as
operated by them that has studied in the Rising Sun Detecative Agencies correspondence School of
Detecating Snook says he don't know anything about any beer, said Nan Kill Philian,
entering hastily and then pausing as she saw mister Mullen, did you tell
him it was upstairs in bed, asked Philo Gub in his room in his
bed, said Attorney Mullen eagerly. Why that puts an entirely different aspect on
the matter. That gives me, as city Attorney, all the proof I
shall need to convict the respectable Miss Martha Turner and her honorable nephew of the
Eagle, And by the Gods, I will convict them, he glared at
missus Wilmerton. Nan broke into sobs. Unless, he added gently, this
whole matter is dropped. Philo Gubb took out all the money he had received
and counted it, sitting cross legged on the ladder. I guess, he
said, thoughtfully, you had better run up to the jail and tell snoosey,
I want to see him right away, Miss Kilfilian, maybe he can
stretch the jail that much again. Tell him, I'm just going to get
down from this ladder and start to work. And I want to ask his
advice. What do you want to ask him, inquired Attorney Mullen, as
Nan hurried away. I want to ask him about those seven bottles of beer
and that beer opener, said Philo Gubb. Mister Gubb said the city attorney.
I can tell you about those bottles of beer. If those bottles of
beer came from my house, Aunt Martha Turner goes to the penitentiary. If
she does not go to the penitentiary, there are no bottles of beer,
and there is no beer opener, and never were. I told her she
had done a foolish thing. Foolish thing, exclaimed missus Wilmington. Just so,
and it was foolish, said attorneymwen if it was done, and if
it was done, and Snooks Turner telephoned, and I thought he meant the
burglary, I would naturally assault him. You hurt him bad, said Filo
Gubb. And I meant to, said attorneing Mowen. All turned toward the
door where policeman Foggerty entered with Snooksy and Nan. I have done everything I
could to quiet up the matter, said Foggarty to Mullen, thus explaining his
interest in the affair. I liked you, said Snooks cheerfully. I'm going
to stay in jail. Aunt Martha Turner interrupted him. She came into the
kitchen like a gust of wind, scattering the others like leaves, and threw
her arms around her nephew, Snooksy. Oh my, Snooksy, my,
Snooksy, She moaned, don't you love your old auntie anymore? Won't you
be a good boy for your poor old auntie? Don't you love her at
all anymore? Sure, said Snooks happily. A fellow can love you in
jail, can't he? But won't you come out, she pleaded. Everybody
wants you to come out, dear boy. See they all want you to
come out, every last one of them. Please come out. Oh I
like it in jail, said Snooks. It gives me time for meditation.
Well, goodbye, folks, I'll be going back. His aunt grasped him
firmly by the arm and wailed. So did Nan. But Snooksy begged missus
Turner don't you know they'll send me to the penitentiary if you go back to
that old jail. Yes, but don't you care, Auntie. They say
the penitentiary is nicer than the jail, better doors, nobody can break in
and steal things from you. Snuog's turner said his aunt You know as well
as I do that mister Mullin will forgive and forget if you will. Would
you rather see me go to prison suffer? No, of course not,
Auntie, said Snooks, laughing. But you see, I've hired Detective Gub
to work on this case, and if there's no case, it will not
be fair to him. He's all worked up about it. He's so eager
to be at it that he has almost come down from the top of that
ladder. In another day or two, he would come down all the way
down, and then there's no telling what would happen. No, I'm a
newspaper man. I want Filo Gub to discover something we don't know anything about.
I might start in trailing and shadowing somebody that hasn't anything to do with
this case, suggested Philo Gubb. That wouldn't discommode none of you folks,
and I'd sort of feel as if I was giving you your money's worth.
Somebody has been writing on the front of the Methodist church with black chalk.
I might try to detect who's done that, but that would be a very
difficult job, said Snooks. It would be some hard admitted Philo Gubb.
Then you ought to have more money, said Snooks. Aunt Martha ought to
contribute to the fund. If Aunt Martha contributes to the fund, I'll be
good. I'll come out of jail. Aunt Martha opened her shopping bag and
fumbled in it with her old fingers. Filo Gubb took from his pocket the
bills he had been given during the morning. He counted them. He had
exactly one hundred dollars, just enough to send to mister Meadowbrook. How much
should I give you, mister Gubb asked Aunt Martha tremulously, and Filo Gubb
stared thoughtfully at the ceiling for a few minutes. When he spoke, his
words were cryptic to all those in the room. Well, ma'am, he
said, I guess ten cents will be about enough. I've got a two
cent postage stamp myself. Ain't Detective's wonderful whispered Nan clinging two Snook's arm.
You can't ever tell what they really mean. Nobody seemed to care what Filo
Gub meant, but a week later Snook stopped him on the street and asked
him why he had asked for ten cents for to register a letter, said
Filo Gubb, A letter I had to send off, and of the two
cents stamp by Ellis Parker Butler