WEBVTT 1 00:00:00.680 --> 00:00:07.679 This the two seventeen Recovery podcast with Corey Winfield. I don't know why would 2 00:00:07.679 --> 00:00:11.160 they sit there and watch this talk in two microphones and look at each other 3 00:00:11.320 --> 00:00:16.320 and look at your faces that you give me sometimes and co hold Marnie Winfield. 4 00:00:16.559 --> 00:00:20.480 In situations like that, if you take the time to weigh the pros 5 00:00:20.480 --> 00:00:24.480 and cons of your involvement in something, I think this is across the board 6 00:00:24.480 --> 00:00:27.120 with a lot of things in life, you know, doesn't make sense for 7 00:00:27.199 --> 00:00:34.200 me in my world. It is the ninth of September twenty twenty three when 8 00:00:34.280 --> 00:00:37.439 names Cory Winfield. My name is Mary Winfield. Welcome. That's two seventeen 9 00:00:37.479 --> 00:00:41.799 Recovery podcast. And I was just thinking about this today. There's this guy 10 00:00:41.799 --> 00:00:44.960 who does the Recovery podcast and cannot remember the name of it, but they 11 00:00:45.000 --> 00:00:48.079 film it. And I remember like when he first started, he was like 12 00:00:48.159 --> 00:00:51.880 in a garage or something, and it just slowly has progressed. Now he's 13 00:00:51.920 --> 00:00:55.719 got like this nice little studio set. Oh yeah, yeah. I thought, 14 00:00:55.719 --> 00:00:58.280 man, that's cool. I should do that, but I don't want 15 00:00:58.320 --> 00:01:03.320 to. My idea of it would be like once a month because there's a 16 00:01:03.359 --> 00:01:06.159 lot of work when you record it, because he doesn't just videotape it and 17 00:01:06.200 --> 00:01:08.480 then just put it out there to the world like they have to edit it 18 00:01:08.599 --> 00:01:11.799 and blah bl blah blah, and I just don't have time for all that. 19 00:01:12.359 --> 00:01:15.840 But it feels a once a month thing. And if it was like 20 00:01:15.959 --> 00:01:19.959 right now the studio here, it's better than mine he had. But I'm 21 00:01:19.000 --> 00:01:23.879 just saying it's it's nice, it's comfortable. If I put some cameras on, 22 00:01:25.000 --> 00:01:29.239 like we can have some people in comfortable theater seating and at a desk 23 00:01:29.359 --> 00:01:33.920 and whatever, you know, like it would be more of a conversation. 24 00:01:34.159 --> 00:01:38.159 Yeah, that's how I would want to do it once a month. And 25 00:01:38.239 --> 00:01:42.599 I talked to Scott from the Reservation Conversation about it, and he said, 26 00:01:42.680 --> 00:01:49.359 yeah, yeah, that sounds good, Scott. Scott, he says that 27 00:01:49.359 --> 00:01:55.319 sounds good about a lot of things, and and I understand where he's coming 28 00:01:55.359 --> 00:02:00.280 from. To commit to something, it's hard. It's hard to do because 29 00:02:00.280 --> 00:02:04.000 you never know. I don't know what's coming up this week, right, 30 00:02:04.159 --> 00:02:07.599 you know. It kind of gets some of those things. But with that 31 00:02:07.840 --> 00:02:12.039 said, I saw something on the counter upstairs. It is eight and a 32 00:02:12.039 --> 00:02:16.120 half inches by five and a half inches and it's just sitting on the counter 33 00:02:16.360 --> 00:02:23.240 upstairs. Oh my official license, yeah right, yeah, for my masters 34 00:02:23.879 --> 00:02:28.439 yep. So I am a licensed master social worker and the State of Michigan 35 00:02:28.560 --> 00:02:36.479 sent me my official certification. You know, it's funny because it says in 36 00:02:36.599 --> 00:02:40.680 there like supposedly shep was to like frame those. Yeah, those are not 37 00:02:40.879 --> 00:02:47.400 very pretty. That's why the framework if you can buy different types of frames. 38 00:02:47.520 --> 00:02:50.599 I mean, I'm all about. I'm all about. I'm waiting for 39 00:02:50.639 --> 00:02:53.919 my diploma. Like that's going to look awesome. I mean they'll license me. 40 00:02:54.120 --> 00:02:58.639 M m, yeah, I see what you're saying. It almost looks 41 00:02:58.639 --> 00:03:00.759 like a title to a car, a new car, like what it's like? 42 00:03:00.800 --> 00:03:05.360 Oh no, Marty, it seriously does it looks like from the like 43 00:03:05.479 --> 00:03:08.879 Secretary of State? Like it's just no, I think license like titles to 44 00:03:08.960 --> 00:03:15.240 cars actually look cooler than that looks because it's just like blue and with like 45 00:03:15.280 --> 00:03:19.240 that typing. What do they call that? Do they call that Secretary of 46 00:03:19.319 --> 00:03:23.639 State font? I don't know, because it's a font. It's the same 47 00:03:23.680 --> 00:03:28.159 font that like the government uses should we start a business, I don't know, 48 00:03:28.240 --> 00:03:31.719 but I'm sure it's called something, but it's always the same. It's 49 00:03:31.719 --> 00:03:37.000 like the I'm in trouble font or like that this is important font. I 50 00:03:37.000 --> 00:03:40.400 don't know what it is. Yeah, yeah, that's I look into that 51 00:03:40.439 --> 00:03:44.879 and then we can have people start contacting you if they need a license to 52 00:03:44.960 --> 00:03:49.360 start a print shop. No, so it was the sure it's hats and 53 00:03:49.400 --> 00:03:53.960 licenses to seventeen Recovery. It's it's very cool. It's really it's amazing. 54 00:03:53.479 --> 00:03:58.840 It came in the mailbox of our new home. I mean, that was 55 00:03:59.039 --> 00:04:03.000 icing on the cake that hard work is paying off. The therapist Susan reached 56 00:04:03.000 --> 00:04:06.919 out to me the other day and she heard the podcast I did the other 57 00:04:06.960 --> 00:04:13.400 day on my own and about the Ashley Furniture debacle, and she's just like, 58 00:04:13.599 --> 00:04:17.199 get them chairs yet, m oh, I still haven't sent them a 59 00:04:17.199 --> 00:04:20.199 math problem though, like solve them. Like remember when we'rining to school and 60 00:04:20.199 --> 00:04:24.560 it's like you'd have to get to the the end, le me two problem. 61 00:04:24.600 --> 00:04:29.040 What do they call them? Critical thinking or fine? Thank you? 62 00:04:29.959 --> 00:04:32.680 Anyway, it's fine. I wrote that out in a response on Better Business 63 00:04:32.720 --> 00:04:38.079 Bureau to Ashley Furniture, and I did not see the receipt at the time 64 00:04:38.639 --> 00:04:40.920 because I was like, why don't you look and see the order number. 65 00:04:40.920 --> 00:04:45.199 Man like, check my order. You can see that order two sets, 66 00:04:46.600 --> 00:04:49.360 And they wrote back, Nope, we attracted it, which I didn't see, 67 00:04:49.360 --> 00:04:53.879 and I'm like, I'm sorry, I don't see it. And once 68 00:04:53.920 --> 00:04:57.279 I did see it, after I had sent my reply with a little problem 69 00:04:57.360 --> 00:05:02.120 or whatever and the math's operation and whatever, then I saw it and I 70 00:05:02.160 --> 00:05:05.160 was like, oh my god, they're so stupid. They even highlight it 71 00:05:05.680 --> 00:05:10.279 and it says whatever kind of crap chair we bought, which is actually they're 72 00:05:10.279 --> 00:05:15.120 pretty nice. And then it said two count, so if you bought one, 73 00:05:15.319 --> 00:05:17.040 it would be a two count and it says quantity too, and they're 74 00:05:17.079 --> 00:05:21.480 like they highlight it. I'm like, what idiots? Is it a generational 75 00:05:21.560 --> 00:05:25.680 thing? Like do I call up there and say, hey, what year 76 00:05:25.680 --> 00:05:30.040 were you born? If they were born after nineteen ninety eight, I just 77 00:05:30.079 --> 00:05:31.160 say, can you give me somebody else? Please? Can you give me 78 00:05:31.199 --> 00:05:35.040 like somebody who was born in like eighty one, maybe eighty two, eighty 79 00:05:35.040 --> 00:05:41.879 five, ninety even. I don't know, Honey's is it? Are they 80 00:05:42.079 --> 00:05:45.279 all in China? Like what country are they from? Because the people that 81 00:05:45.319 --> 00:05:50.240 were responding were in Milwaukee. I don't know. I'm a fan of Wisconsin. 82 00:05:50.279 --> 00:05:54.879 People are well sometimes I am to listen to this podcast, I guess, 83 00:05:54.920 --> 00:05:58.120 and they're and recovery that I'm a fan. But well, you just 84 00:05:58.160 --> 00:06:02.879 need to do what you You can't let the little things like this absorb all 85 00:06:02.959 --> 00:06:08.759 that much energy. I mean, you've done everything you can do, You've 86 00:06:08.759 --> 00:06:12.319 made your case. You're in the right. They're not, like, well, 87 00:06:12.360 --> 00:06:15.079 who do I track down from the company like that has the IQ over 88 00:06:15.519 --> 00:06:19.519 eighty? I don't know the answer to that. I don't know either. 89 00:06:20.120 --> 00:06:26.680 But if you're losing sleep over it any more sleep over it, then we're 90 00:06:26.680 --> 00:06:29.680 gonna have to work on having you figure out a way to let go of 91 00:06:29.720 --> 00:06:32.959 that I want my chairs. We might end up having to just no, 92 00:06:33.319 --> 00:06:38.040 we are not buying other chairs. We will send that whole setback in all 93 00:06:38.120 --> 00:06:41.160 right to all if you listening, We're gonna work on this situation. But 94 00:06:43.199 --> 00:06:46.839 or we just like if they don't end up saying honoring it, then we 95 00:06:46.959 --> 00:06:53.680 just end up with only two chairs for like the rest of our lives. 96 00:06:53.839 --> 00:07:00.560 With the table. Smash smash smash, just start over smash them. We 97 00:07:00.639 --> 00:07:03.519 tell them that they were damaged and come get them when we order from Big 98 00:07:03.560 --> 00:07:08.480 Lots. I don't know that anyway, I don't really want to the point 99 00:07:08.560 --> 00:07:10.720 was, Susan reached out to me the other day. There you go, 100 00:07:10.920 --> 00:07:13.199 and that was nice. She said congrats, and she's like, oh my 101 00:07:13.240 --> 00:07:15.879 gosh, you guys got a house. That's amazing. Yeah, and Susan 102 00:07:16.360 --> 00:07:19.480 and it's funny because when I was at so we're living in Boyne City, 103 00:07:19.720 --> 00:07:25.040 fresh out of treatment, one of the qualifications to be and so we're living 104 00:07:25.040 --> 00:07:29.040 at Nathan's house. You had to get a therapist, you had you had 105 00:07:29.079 --> 00:07:30.920 to do all this extra stuff you know that you should be doing anyway. 106 00:07:31.279 --> 00:07:33.600 And since I was on Medicaid, it's like, okay, it's not out 107 00:07:33.600 --> 00:07:38.680 of my dime. I just gotta go see this person. And so Susan 108 00:07:38.720 --> 00:07:42.439 remembers from the very start when I came in there and when I was telling 109 00:07:42.439 --> 00:07:45.519 her here's what I'm gonna do, you know, like she she has like 110 00:07:45.560 --> 00:07:47.800 witnessed the whole groundwork of it all. And then you know, meeting you 111 00:07:47.879 --> 00:07:51.519 and talking about you and how I like you and this and that and I'm 112 00:07:51.560 --> 00:07:58.000 afraid and I got no money and I got nothing to offer and like all 113 00:07:58.000 --> 00:08:01.360 that stuff, like she has hurt. So it's pretty cool that you know, 114 00:08:01.480 --> 00:08:05.439 she's still around, and I need to see when she's going to start 115 00:08:05.519 --> 00:08:11.240 taking Priority health. But I guess technically I don't know. We'll see, 116 00:08:11.519 --> 00:08:13.319 but I do need to talk to my therapist because it's been a minute. 117 00:08:13.600 --> 00:08:18.959 Yeah, but I'm glad she listens to the podcast once while. Yeah, 118 00:08:18.079 --> 00:08:24.720 but it is cool. Yeah, and I wanted to talk today too about 119 00:08:24.920 --> 00:08:31.799 relapse. Let's just jump right into some recovery stuff, because it seems I 120 00:08:31.879 --> 00:08:37.759 had many relaps around this type or time of year. And I don't know 121 00:08:37.759 --> 00:08:41.600 if it's a seasonal thing where every season you can just blame it on the 122 00:08:41.639 --> 00:08:45.799 season changing. It's oh, let's listen that. But as the season changed, 123 00:08:45.919 --> 00:08:48.600 so does our our memories, Like our memories change, and you know, 124 00:08:50.120 --> 00:08:52.000 well not our memories changing, but we start going back to the oh, 125 00:08:52.039 --> 00:08:56.879 I remember the fall, and even the smell of fall, you know, 126 00:08:56.960 --> 00:09:00.240 can really trigger people and send you back to a place that's either good 127 00:09:00.279 --> 00:09:07.120 or bad. And you've you know, been on the front lines of this 128 00:09:07.200 --> 00:09:13.320 as well, and now we're helping people in football. Football's back. That's 129 00:09:13.399 --> 00:09:16.000 that's a huge trigger. That's a huge thing for people, and some might 130 00:09:16.000 --> 00:09:22.519 not understand why that would be but it is, Uh, you're not feeling 131 00:09:22.519 --> 00:09:24.679 good at football's on, Well you already get a little spike a dopamine, 132 00:09:24.679 --> 00:09:26.480 you know, you're like, all right, football's on. That's great, 133 00:09:28.279 --> 00:09:31.639 Yeah, and then what will make it better? I think the other thing 134 00:09:31.679 --> 00:09:37.399 too is there's there's so much chaos that comes along with like sporting events and 135 00:09:37.480 --> 00:09:43.200 things like I remember like tailgating and things like that, and like nobody's paying 136 00:09:43.200 --> 00:09:46.679 attention to any what anybody else is doing, really, you know what I 137 00:09:46.679 --> 00:09:54.320 mean. So it just even that whole thing like who's going to notice if 138 00:09:54.320 --> 00:09:56.279 I'm drinking a couple of beers, you know what I mean, as long 139 00:09:56.279 --> 00:10:00.720 as they don't get drunk. That kind of thing. Ye, yeah, 140 00:10:00.799 --> 00:10:05.000 that would be That would not be an environment in early early recovery. That's 141 00:10:05.000 --> 00:10:09.919 not a place even though I'm not huge into like actually attending sporting events, 142 00:10:09.960 --> 00:10:13.879 but people have parties, you know what they mean, And it's a thing. 143 00:10:15.519 --> 00:10:22.679 Shoot, man, I mean the commercials around it's like every single event. 144 00:10:22.000 --> 00:10:26.080 Well, there's some like subway sandwiches and stuff that's football, like yay 145 00:10:26.519 --> 00:10:31.159 or doritos or whatever, but nine times out of ten, that's always about 146 00:10:31.240 --> 00:10:35.639 like there's always about booze there, you know, beer or whatever, and 147 00:10:37.440 --> 00:10:41.399 so they just kind of go hand in hand, like you know, supporting 148 00:10:41.399 --> 00:10:43.600 events. But then, like you were saying that, I was thinking about 149 00:10:43.679 --> 00:10:48.480 the seasons, like you know they say like it's wedding season. You know, 150 00:10:48.639 --> 00:10:54.159 that's a huge trigger for people like going attending events like that. It's 151 00:10:54.240 --> 00:10:58.679 the beach, you know, those kind of things. But you're right. 152 00:10:58.720 --> 00:11:05.360 I mean there's little pieces of sensory pieces of everything that can remind people of 153 00:11:07.759 --> 00:11:11.720 things that increase that like you said, increase that dopelmine and make you feel 154 00:11:11.759 --> 00:11:13.200 like kind of that elated piece. It's like, oh my gosh, like 155 00:11:13.360 --> 00:11:16.919 this is what what? What? What? What's missing here? What am 156 00:11:16.919 --> 00:11:24.080 I used to having with this feeling? Pizza? So imoust say beer and 157 00:11:24.120 --> 00:11:26.720 pizza. But that's one of the things though. And the other night the 158 00:11:26.759 --> 00:11:31.960 Lions were on congrats to them for their winning. Congratulations the Lions. Yes 159 00:11:31.840 --> 00:11:35.320 that's a good job and thank you. And last year for giving us tickets. 160 00:11:35.480 --> 00:11:37.440 I think that they might not have tickets to give this year because people 161 00:11:37.440 --> 00:11:41.360 actually bought tickets to go see them at this point, I'm sure, but 162 00:11:41.480 --> 00:11:45.799 we still do appreciate going last year and taking a group of people and so 163 00:11:45.879 --> 00:11:48.919 we're living. So thanks again to the lions, and yeah, congrats on 164 00:11:48.919 --> 00:11:54.480 the wind. But we had pizza. You know, that's something that again 165 00:11:54.919 --> 00:11:58.480 despike that dopemine a little bit. We watched Survivor, we'd like to have 166 00:11:58.519 --> 00:12:01.759 popcorn, you know, add that little something to make it a little bit 167 00:12:01.799 --> 00:12:03.639 better. And maybe the Survivor is not even it. Maybe it's just I 168 00:12:03.720 --> 00:12:09.840 enjoy time with you talking shit about people eating popcorn. You know, Oh 169 00:12:09.879 --> 00:12:13.559 I hate that guy, Oh I hate that chick. Whatever I mean, 170 00:12:13.600 --> 00:12:16.159 it's not even Survivor at all. You know, maybe it's just the time 171 00:12:16.279 --> 00:12:20.039 spent with you. But we associate it with Survivor, and that is a 172 00:12:20.039 --> 00:12:24.200 good time that we can sit down for an hour and eat popcorn and talk 173 00:12:24.240 --> 00:12:28.200 to it about people we don't like. On surviving. No, we're mostly 174 00:12:28.240 --> 00:12:31.080 like rooting for the people we do like. Yes, that's true. You 175 00:12:31.080 --> 00:12:35.159 know, we spend it like that, use our good energy, I think 176 00:12:35.240 --> 00:12:39.320 for the most part. But the relapse thing is real. And if somebody 177 00:12:39.399 --> 00:12:43.799 does, you know, relapse, just remember relapse as a part of addiction. 178 00:12:43.240 --> 00:12:48.519 You know, that's that's part of it and doesn't mean it's good doesn't 179 00:12:48.519 --> 00:12:52.440 mean it's bad. What it means is what are you going to do now? 180 00:12:52.799 --> 00:12:56.279 Exactly? What is what is that person gonna do? Are they gonna 181 00:12:56.559 --> 00:12:58.200 keep going? They're gonna keep hiding it. And I was talking to a 182 00:12:58.200 --> 00:13:01.679 guy the other day, this dreament center I went to and I'm just talking 183 00:13:01.720 --> 00:13:07.879 to the group, and he said the same thing that I would say to 184 00:13:07.919 --> 00:13:13.960 myself before, as I'll just do it this weekend, and you pull it 185 00:13:13.000 --> 00:13:16.039 off, you get away with it. You feel like Houdini, Like, 186 00:13:16.120 --> 00:13:20.639 man, see I drink. I started drinking Friday night. I drink Saturday, 187 00:13:20.679 --> 00:13:24.039 and I was supposed to stop Saturday, but Donna, that's how it 188 00:13:24.360 --> 00:13:26.840 went for me. But but if you can pull it off for one weekend 189 00:13:26.600 --> 00:13:28.759 and then go the rest of the week, and just like, man, 190 00:13:28.799 --> 00:13:31.120 my rewards at the end of the week, my rewards at the end of 191 00:13:31.120 --> 00:13:35.159 the week, you're probably not gonna make it that next week. First of 192 00:13:35.200 --> 00:13:37.200 all, it'll be Thursday. Like if you're like, hey, I'll drink 193 00:13:37.240 --> 00:13:41.480 Friday and it'll be the same as last week, it's not gonna work. 194 00:13:41.919 --> 00:13:45.360 You're gonna get to Thursday and start thinking, well, and now there's football 195 00:13:45.399 --> 00:13:48.279 on, so hey, yeah, I'll start early Thursday, Friday, You're 196 00:13:48.279 --> 00:13:50.399 probably gonna call in and just drink all damn day and it's gonna keep going 197 00:13:50.519 --> 00:13:54.799 till Monday, and you're gonna realize that you're right back in it. Yeah, 198 00:13:54.879 --> 00:13:58.279 and you had to call in again, and like, I didn't like 199 00:13:58.320 --> 00:14:01.399 that job anyway. It doesn't take long, you know, for it to 200 00:14:01.399 --> 00:14:09.399 get you. And it's it's very much. I think you hit the nail 201 00:14:09.440 --> 00:14:11.120 on the heat on just saying that. It's about what you do after. 202 00:14:11.559 --> 00:14:16.639 It's about what you do with the time after you recognize, like I was 203 00:14:16.679 --> 00:14:20.000 doing well, things were great, you know, I was turning stuff. 204 00:14:20.039 --> 00:14:24.200 I was turning things around, just being productive. Like I know, alcohol 205 00:14:24.320 --> 00:14:28.279 is not good for me. It doesn't take me to good places. It 206 00:14:28.320 --> 00:14:30.879 doesn't get me. It gets in the way of things that I love. 207 00:14:31.720 --> 00:14:35.600 I'm better off without it. Whatever it is. I mean, everybody's affected 208 00:14:35.600 --> 00:14:39.879 by it differently, Drugs and alcohol right done different levels. But that doesn't 209 00:14:39.919 --> 00:14:43.639 make it mean. Like if you've tried for sobriety and then something happens that 210 00:14:43.679 --> 00:14:46.960 you just say, forget it, I can't do it. I'm not going 211 00:14:46.000 --> 00:14:50.600 to do it, you know whatever. I'm just gonna stay in my addiction, 212 00:14:50.120 --> 00:14:56.759 because it's it's gonna be a domino effect. Everything else is just going 213 00:14:56.840 --> 00:15:01.320 to start falling apart, you know, and doesn't take long. So like, 214 00:15:01.600 --> 00:15:05.639 and it's people. I think the question is everyone asks you, like, 215 00:15:05.679 --> 00:15:09.840 what do I do now? Like, Okay, this happened, what 216 00:15:09.840 --> 00:15:11.759 do I do? Well? First off, I want to say to those 217 00:15:11.799 --> 00:15:18.720 people. First, you're you're talking to me like or you're talking to somebody. 218 00:15:18.399 --> 00:15:22.039 You know, You're admitting the fact that something something happened and you made 219 00:15:22.080 --> 00:15:26.720 a mistake. You're acknowledging this is a mistake. You're not sitting somewhere still, 220 00:15:28.600 --> 00:15:31.000 you know, drinking or maybe you are, but at least you're reaching 221 00:15:31.039 --> 00:15:35.200 out saying, I'm in back in my back in my addiction, I need 222 00:15:35.240 --> 00:15:41.480 help right And that's huge because a lot of people don't get back there right 223 00:15:41.519 --> 00:15:46.799 away, you know. And so I think that speaks volumes, and so 224 00:15:46.720 --> 00:15:50.440 at that point, it's like, what does it look to you? What 225 00:15:50.600 --> 00:15:52.759 does it look like to you to get back on track? I don't know. 226 00:15:52.879 --> 00:15:56.799 I mean for me, it would be talk to talk to other people 227 00:15:56.879 --> 00:16:00.080 or listen to other people in recovery, right, go to a meeting, 228 00:16:02.000 --> 00:16:06.240 talk about it, listen to other people say I have to say about what's 229 00:16:06.240 --> 00:16:11.759 going on in their lives, you know, because it's like self help meetings 230 00:16:11.799 --> 00:16:15.200 are not about all everything that's great, that it's about talking about stuff like 231 00:16:15.240 --> 00:16:19.559 this. That's what the platform is fort to be able to talk about when 232 00:16:19.600 --> 00:16:30.159 you slip, and and hopefully meaning you go to will be supportive of you 233 00:16:30.480 --> 00:16:34.759 and listen, and then maybe people will follow up after your share and talk 234 00:16:34.799 --> 00:16:38.759 about their experiences and how they got back on track, and then you can 235 00:16:38.840 --> 00:16:44.440 learn from that and feel supported, not feel like an outcast like I feel 236 00:16:44.480 --> 00:16:48.919 shamed, and I feel like all the work I did is gone, and 237 00:16:48.200 --> 00:16:52.320 it's not gone. Otherwise you wouldn't be having this conversation. If you have 238 00:16:52.399 --> 00:16:55.799 it in you enough to talk about the fact that you know you made a 239 00:16:55.840 --> 00:16:59.759 mistake and that you need to try to find your way back. That's a 240 00:16:59.759 --> 00:17:04.240 growth right there. It's what you do with it at that point. And 241 00:17:04.720 --> 00:17:08.759 I think that there's a couple of different reasons why people realize, Like I 242 00:17:08.759 --> 00:17:12.240 said, you know, sometimes it could be the season, but getting to 243 00:17:12.279 --> 00:17:17.880 know the reason. For example, if you're just a guy who's like, 244 00:17:17.920 --> 00:17:22.119 hey man, I want to quit drinking and there's no consequences, like you're 245 00:17:22.119 --> 00:17:26.279 not married, maybe you live alone, your job's all right, but you're 246 00:17:26.279 --> 00:17:29.759 just like, man, this is getting this is getting too crazy. And 247 00:17:29.880 --> 00:17:33.119 you've had like three months clean, life's getting great again, and you're just 248 00:17:33.160 --> 00:17:37.720 like, man, I'm gonna drink this weekend. And then you do and 249 00:17:37.839 --> 00:17:40.000 you wake up and you feel like crap, and you feel like, man, 250 00:17:40.599 --> 00:17:41.720 I had ninety days. I even told my parents, you know, 251 00:17:41.720 --> 00:17:47.359 because you start getting proud about it, and man, not only just what 252 00:17:47.359 --> 00:17:51.640 do I do? Well? You can either keep trying to trick people until 253 00:17:51.680 --> 00:17:53.960 it's out of control. But again, if you have no consequences, you 254 00:17:55.000 --> 00:17:56.839 will have them. Eventually, you're gonna lose your job. You know, 255 00:17:56.880 --> 00:18:02.279 your friends are gonna stop hanging out. But but it goes back to you 256 00:18:02.319 --> 00:18:06.279 know, what was the reason, like the football season? Okay, that 257 00:18:06.400 --> 00:18:08.839 I that I have the three months and I needed that reward and I deserved 258 00:18:08.880 --> 00:18:11.680 it. Well, I don't go slamming my dick in the door when I 259 00:18:11.680 --> 00:18:14.920 need a reward. I don't try to put my head through a wall. 260 00:18:15.599 --> 00:18:18.759 That's what you're doing. Drinking is not fun. You know, the brain 261 00:18:18.839 --> 00:18:21.599 will trick you into thinking, oh yeah, you need some more fun. 262 00:18:21.640 --> 00:18:23.759 Hey, this will make it more fun. It doesn't make it more fun. 263 00:18:25.200 --> 00:18:27.839 It's like stop smell the roses, as they say, think about really 264 00:18:29.160 --> 00:18:33.440 is it. Is it more fun because you're drinking? No? Is it 265 00:18:33.440 --> 00:18:37.519 more fun because you're high? No it's not, I'm telling you, but 266 00:18:37.559 --> 00:18:41.279 your your brain will trick you into thinking that you are and that it is 267 00:18:41.319 --> 00:18:45.079 more fun, and then you'll come down. Then you'll feel that that regret, 268 00:18:45.119 --> 00:18:48.279 and and then you're you're you're just on the downward slope that goes really 269 00:18:48.319 --> 00:18:52.680 fast. But if you can break it down though, and maybe it's it's 270 00:18:52.720 --> 00:18:56.559 not always Hey, it's the season changing, or maybe it's not, Hey, 271 00:18:56.599 --> 00:18:59.519 I need a reward because I've been doing so great and football's on and 272 00:18:59.559 --> 00:19:03.359 this makes it better. Maybe you're just stuck in a horrible situation anyway. 273 00:19:03.240 --> 00:19:10.119 Maybe your marriage is falling apart, Maybe your husband's dick. Maybe your wife's 274 00:19:10.680 --> 00:19:15.839 beating me up. That happens, by the way, Then I'm gonna go 275 00:19:15.920 --> 00:19:18.640 drink because it makes me numb the feelings. You know, it doesn't make 276 00:19:18.680 --> 00:19:22.279 you feel better, but it makes you forget about them, and it makes 277 00:19:22.279 --> 00:19:25.599 you feel like you can tolerate it. Right, and in those situations, 278 00:19:25.799 --> 00:19:32.039 it's it's tough because I want the person not to lose their mind, but 279 00:19:32.079 --> 00:19:36.079 I also want the person to have control of their own life and realize when 280 00:19:36.079 --> 00:19:42.799 they need to leave a situation and change is scary. And I've had family 281 00:19:42.880 --> 00:19:47.759 member recently go through a divorce and change is scary, and they're just like, 282 00:19:47.759 --> 00:19:52.039 oh, and you have too. You know, both kind of way 283 00:19:52.119 --> 00:19:56.519 different I think situations. But at the end of the day, it's what 284 00:19:56.680 --> 00:20:02.960 makes you happy, what makes sense, and and recognizing that and reaching out 285 00:20:03.039 --> 00:20:06.319 for the help that you might need, whether it be help from the state, 286 00:20:06.359 --> 00:20:10.279 whether it be help from a family member, friend, therapist, whatever. 287 00:20:11.200 --> 00:20:14.480 You know, you don't have to live life stuck in that fear, 288 00:20:15.200 --> 00:20:21.880 right And if she's beating you up, man, leave, Oh it's easy, 289 00:20:21.880 --> 00:20:25.240 but we got kids, Okay. Well, there's ways you can talk 290 00:20:25.279 --> 00:20:29.160 about it, and people you can talk about it with, and they can 291 00:20:29.160 --> 00:20:32.119 give you probably a lot better ideas than I can. I would say, 292 00:20:32.119 --> 00:20:36.000 well, let's get get the police and here, let's go to the police 293 00:20:36.000 --> 00:20:40.759 station, or let's go to somewhere in public library where she's not going to 294 00:20:40.880 --> 00:20:42.279 hit me, and she might still hit me or not me. I'm just 295 00:20:42.279 --> 00:20:48.240 saying the guy, and there's ways you can talk about it like that and 296 00:20:48.279 --> 00:20:52.680 say here's what we're doing with the kids. And I don't know, there's 297 00:20:52.119 --> 00:20:56.640 there's ways out of those horrible situations without just trying to numb the pain with 298 00:20:56.960 --> 00:21:03.960 killing yourself by using drugs, because it doesn't it doesn't make that situation go 299 00:21:03.240 --> 00:21:06.799 get any better. No, it's only gonna get worse. I'm gonna get 300 00:21:06.839 --> 00:21:14.000 worse yep. And I mean, the funny thing is, it's like I 301 00:21:14.039 --> 00:21:15.839 remember so many times when I had a little bit of time, a little 302 00:21:15.839 --> 00:21:19.759 bit of time under my belt, and I like was like I'm gonna I 303 00:21:19.799 --> 00:21:22.079 know, I'm gonna relapse like I had it. You know, we know 304 00:21:22.160 --> 00:21:26.960 we relapsed even before we actually do it. And I almost was like inevitably, 305 00:21:27.039 --> 00:21:30.319 like almost got to the point where I was like telling myself, like 306 00:21:30.839 --> 00:21:37.279 this is not gonna end well. Like I was that experienced with my own 307 00:21:37.359 --> 00:21:44.839 drinking that I actually knew that it was not going to end well and this 308 00:21:44.920 --> 00:21:48.519 was going to be the beginning of hell again. But it's because I had 309 00:21:48.720 --> 00:21:56.599 so much kind of dislike about where I was with me, like in my 310 00:21:56.920 --> 00:22:04.039 life and in myself and within me, that like kind of internal conflict that 311 00:22:04.200 --> 00:22:08.359 I think that I felt like it didn't matter. That just speaks to the 312 00:22:08.400 --> 00:22:17.160 disease in general, and it really speaks to the root cause of alcoholism and 313 00:22:17.279 --> 00:22:21.160 drug use. Right, it's a symptom of what's really happening with us. 314 00:22:21.680 --> 00:22:26.000 I mean, you could have five half gallons in front of me and be 315 00:22:26.160 --> 00:22:30.279 like, here's your opportunity. But if I have shit going on for me 316 00:22:30.359 --> 00:22:33.480 and I'm happy with me and I'm happy with where I'm at in my life 317 00:22:33.480 --> 00:22:37.599 and with my family and with my job, and with my animals and with 318 00:22:38.119 --> 00:22:41.960 all the things that I have, they're free. It's there. There's nobody 319 00:22:42.000 --> 00:22:45.319 stopping me here. It's yours if you want it. I know where that's 320 00:22:45.319 --> 00:22:48.160 going to take me. And at this point in my life, I'm like, 321 00:22:48.279 --> 00:22:52.000 there is nothing that I would that you could put in front of me 322 00:22:52.039 --> 00:22:55.480 for free or even pay me to pick up that alcohol, because I know 323 00:22:55.519 --> 00:22:59.119 it will take everything that I have away from me. But when you have 324 00:22:59.240 --> 00:23:04.920 nothing and you are empty inside, then there's nothing to lose. And that's 325 00:23:04.960 --> 00:23:10.880 when people don't feel like there's an answer and they're like, well, how 326 00:23:10.880 --> 00:23:11.920 do I get to the point where I can feel like I have something to 327 00:23:11.960 --> 00:23:15.880 lose that you gotta put the booze down, because once you put the booze 328 00:23:15.880 --> 00:23:21.640 down for long enough and you stop using for long enough, you'll start gaining 329 00:23:21.680 --> 00:23:25.720 things and you'll start and I'm not talking about things like things like computers and 330 00:23:25.960 --> 00:23:32.480 cars, and I'm talking about self love and self respect and building relationships that 331 00:23:32.480 --> 00:23:37.880 are meaningful. And that's where you start feeling good about yourself, good about 332 00:23:37.960 --> 00:23:41.880 yourself enough that you can go and present yourself in from of somebody and ask 333 00:23:41.920 --> 00:23:45.240 for a good job and get it because you have a skill set that nobody 334 00:23:45.240 --> 00:23:48.880 else has. You probably have had it this whole time, but you haven't 335 00:23:48.920 --> 00:23:53.240 any able to utilize it because you've been too drunk or high. And then 336 00:23:53.319 --> 00:23:59.440 things just start taking shape. And then when that half gallon sitting in front 337 00:23:59.440 --> 00:24:03.759 of you and there's nothing stopping you, you're gonna be like, absolutely not, 338 00:24:03.559 --> 00:24:07.039 because I have too much going on for me. That's that's my take 339 00:24:07.119 --> 00:24:11.039 on the whole thing, not that it makes it any easier, because but 340 00:24:11.079 --> 00:24:14.359 you need to be careful of those vulnerble moments when you forget that piece, 341 00:24:15.440 --> 00:24:18.279 And that's what scares a crap out about about me as a human being? 342 00:24:18.359 --> 00:24:22.599 Is it is it is a person that's an alcoholic, hands down, right? 343 00:24:22.720 --> 00:24:26.119 I mean yeah, I identify as a person in recovery because I feel 344 00:24:26.119 --> 00:24:30.680 like it's more positive way to look at things. But I am you know, 345 00:24:32.240 --> 00:24:34.160 and if I pick up a drink, I will keep drinking. And 346 00:24:34.240 --> 00:24:37.079 once you take the drink, then you aren't powerless. But pretty much what 347 00:24:37.119 --> 00:24:44.200 you're just you're describing is having power over your addiction. And the only way 348 00:24:44.240 --> 00:24:47.440 to get that is to ye have other things in your life, you know, 349 00:24:47.519 --> 00:24:49.400 and how do you get them? You go, you work for them. 350 00:24:49.400 --> 00:24:53.039 You know, nothing happens overnight, and it just it takes a minute, 351 00:24:53.079 --> 00:24:56.119 sometimes takes longer for other people. But you can have goals, you 352 00:24:56.119 --> 00:24:57.799 can have dreams. What do you want to do? What do you want 353 00:24:57.799 --> 00:25:00.440 to be? Where do you want to go? Write that stuffed down? 354 00:25:02.319 --> 00:25:03.640 How are you going to get there? Right right that, right next to 355 00:25:03.680 --> 00:25:07.599 it? And then start? The only one holding yourself back? Well, 356 00:25:07.599 --> 00:25:11.160 I don't know, I can't do this. I can't do not if you 357 00:25:11.200 --> 00:25:14.279 have add too, like that, just because you don't know how to do 358 00:25:14.319 --> 00:25:17.319 it, especially with internet and everything else. It's like you can figure some 359 00:25:17.359 --> 00:25:22.519 stuff out pretty quick. And if you're content with your job, if you're 360 00:25:22.519 --> 00:25:25.960 content with your situation, just the drinking needs to change. Well, what's 361 00:25:26.039 --> 00:25:29.440 causing that or the drug use, even what's what's making you do that. 362 00:25:30.200 --> 00:25:33.480 It's not fun and it's not fun anymore, especially when it gets to the 363 00:25:33.599 --> 00:25:37.119 end of where you got to make a choice of live or die. It's 364 00:25:37.200 --> 00:25:41.279 not fun. Nobody's doing it because it's great, right, that's you know, 365 00:25:41.720 --> 00:25:45.880 we're figuring out that problem and what that is, what you're running from, 366 00:25:45.880 --> 00:25:49.640 what you're hiding, what you're masking. Sometimes it's harder to figure that 367 00:25:49.680 --> 00:25:55.079 out. Yeah, especially when you know you take the piece of like mental 368 00:25:55.119 --> 00:26:02.839 health into consideration, and if you're really struggling with something that is a chemical 369 00:26:02.880 --> 00:26:07.279 imbalance in your brain and that you don't feel right as a person, and 370 00:26:07.279 --> 00:26:11.799 the only thing that makes you feel right or making not feel anything is drugs 371 00:26:11.839 --> 00:26:15.759 or alcohol, and then that turns into its own problem in itself, and 372 00:26:15.799 --> 00:26:19.799 that's where the co occurring comes in and they play off each other immensely. 373 00:26:21.279 --> 00:26:25.119 And for you and I, like, our passion is helping other people and 374 00:26:25.160 --> 00:26:29.759 doing what we do now we do help other people. And so say somebody 375 00:26:29.880 --> 00:26:33.200 was molested as a child and they're just out there, you know, drinking, 376 00:26:33.200 --> 00:26:37.279 and it's like that childhood trauma they've been bearing for so long that they 377 00:26:37.319 --> 00:26:40.920 probably maybe even forgot that it was a big deal, huge thing in their 378 00:26:40.920 --> 00:26:42.720 life. Maybe they know, but like you know what I'm saying, the 379 00:26:42.799 --> 00:26:47.240 masket for so long, but maybe they got to get back to that and 380 00:26:47.279 --> 00:26:52.039 maybe they can help people. They can help children, you know now that 381 00:26:52.119 --> 00:26:53.440 are suffering from the same thing, so that they don't have to go down 382 00:26:53.480 --> 00:26:57.480 the same road they went down. You know, there are so many different 383 00:26:57.920 --> 00:27:03.319 things that people can do to help other people. And just by saying that 384 00:27:03.359 --> 00:27:07.079 happened to me, I became a drug user, an addict, and I 385 00:27:07.119 --> 00:27:15.720 turned it around just by saying that can help somebody else who's struggling. And 386 00:27:15.759 --> 00:27:18.759 then there's you know, jobs in the field that somebody can probably get into, 387 00:27:18.799 --> 00:27:22.000 and you know, that's kind of where we just started. And I 388 00:27:22.640 --> 00:27:27.039 just decided to make my own stuff. Do this because it's needed, and 389 00:27:27.119 --> 00:27:33.519 you'd be surprised. Other stuff that's needed that I don't know much about. 390 00:27:33.119 --> 00:27:36.240 But there's other people out there. They're like, oh, we needed to 391 00:27:36.240 --> 00:27:37.839 do this, and this for people that do this and this, and you 392 00:27:37.839 --> 00:27:42.440 know, gambling addiction is real, and we're gonna get hopefully more involved than 393 00:27:42.480 --> 00:27:47.200 that, because I feel like that just kind of gets overlooked sometimes. And 394 00:27:47.240 --> 00:27:52.079 I feel really bad for those people because it's them. They're the dirty, 395 00:27:52.160 --> 00:27:56.079 rotten scoundrel. They're the ones that went and lost the car or the house, 396 00:27:56.400 --> 00:28:00.920 you know, like they did it. And they can't look at the 397 00:28:00.960 --> 00:28:04.319 alcohol go wells because I was drunk. Oh well, it school, I 398 00:28:04.400 --> 00:28:07.759 was high. They don't have that excuse, you know. And I feel 399 00:28:07.799 --> 00:28:12.400 so bad for them because it's it's the same thing, man, it really 400 00:28:12.480 --> 00:28:18.640 is. It's just mine was a chemical that I was using. You know. 401 00:28:18.680 --> 00:28:21.160 I'm I've said this a million times, but I'm glad I've never won 402 00:28:21.240 --> 00:28:25.240 at a casino. I don't know what would have happened, right if that 403 00:28:25.279 --> 00:28:27.680 would have through the dopeming over and I'm like, wow, yeah, this 404 00:28:27.759 --> 00:28:34.359 is great, right, But being an alcoholic, I couldn't really I'm using 405 00:28:34.440 --> 00:28:38.799 air quotes here, waste my money at the casino because I had alcohol. 406 00:28:38.839 --> 00:28:42.119 Don't waste my money on But if you're struggling, you can reach out for 407 00:28:42.160 --> 00:28:47.559 help. And that's probably one of the toughest things to do. There's resources 408 00:28:47.599 --> 00:28:52.680 on our website to seventeen Recovery dot com. You can go there church. 409 00:28:52.759 --> 00:28:57.759 A lot of people talk to their preacher about that stuff. Yep. Which 410 00:28:57.799 --> 00:29:02.079 I still have to call Randy back. I can't wait till we can settle 411 00:29:02.119 --> 00:29:06.119 in and I just am not all over the place mentally. Now I can 412 00:29:06.119 --> 00:29:08.839 start calling people back and start having normal days. And I think it's just 413 00:29:08.880 --> 00:29:17.039 work from home from now on. I don't know, when you roll your 414 00:29:17.079 --> 00:29:21.279 eyes and just I don't know how things would. I think that there's a 415 00:29:21.359 --> 00:29:25.119 presence needed at work. It is good to have to be able to work 416 00:29:25.200 --> 00:29:30.279 from home office for sure. Yeah, but they're definitely needs to be in 417 00:29:30.359 --> 00:29:33.160 presence at work. I feel at the two seventeen Recovery Center, if you're 418 00:29:33.200 --> 00:29:40.039 interested in attending meetings that you've never tended before, you know a NA. 419 00:29:40.039 --> 00:29:41.640 And I was going to kind of get into that too, about it being 420 00:29:41.680 --> 00:29:45.440 powerless over alcohol, because they in AA, you know, and I'm sure 421 00:29:45.599 --> 00:29:49.400 nas those powerless over drugs. What I think that they mean is when you 422 00:29:49.920 --> 00:29:53.240 are in that hell. I'm not going to speculate on what they mean. 423 00:29:53.279 --> 00:29:56.920 I'm just gonna speculate when I'm talking about so I'll do that. I guess 424 00:29:56.960 --> 00:30:00.200 it's not speculating and just it's more describing. When I'm talking about being powerful, 425 00:30:00.480 --> 00:30:07.240 Like you said earlier, you could put ten fifths, which okay, 426 00:30:07.720 --> 00:30:11.440 the same as one. Really put whatever right there in front of you and 427 00:30:11.759 --> 00:30:17.279 you wouldn't touch it. That to me is you have power. You do 428 00:30:17.359 --> 00:30:21.279 have power over it once you take that first drink, though yeah, then 429 00:30:21.319 --> 00:30:23.480 you really don't. But you're not gonna take that first drink. So I 430 00:30:23.519 --> 00:30:27.599 think changing how you and this is for people in earlier recovery. I'm talking 431 00:30:27.640 --> 00:30:30.839 to how maybe even long term I guess as well. But if you change 432 00:30:30.880 --> 00:30:34.960 it and start looking about you're powerful over it, you will will become powerful 433 00:30:36.000 --> 00:30:41.000 over it. Not saying that you can control your drinking, right, I 434 00:30:41.039 --> 00:30:44.960 can't control mine. I would assume other people are in the same situation. 435 00:30:45.119 --> 00:30:47.720 If you're one of a billion people, and so am I that had this 436 00:30:47.759 --> 00:30:52.519 issue, So don't try to control it because for me and a billion other 437 00:30:52.519 --> 00:30:55.839 people it didn't work, right. I mean, maybe you got something we 438 00:30:55.920 --> 00:31:00.759 don't, but it's not gonna work out. So don't hear me say I'm 439 00:31:00.759 --> 00:31:04.480 powerful over alcohol and think that I'm saying that I can control my drinking. 440 00:31:06.000 --> 00:31:07.720 It's weird. I've never really heard I mean, I agree with what you're 441 00:31:07.759 --> 00:31:12.160 saying. I think it's the I have power over alcohol, not I am 442 00:31:12.200 --> 00:31:18.640 powerful with alcohol, right like I have? You know what I mean? 443 00:31:18.720 --> 00:31:22.160 Does that make sense? I feel like he man I have. It's like 444 00:31:22.200 --> 00:31:27.200 I have power over alcohol with if I don't drink it today, I have 445 00:31:27.279 --> 00:31:33.119 the power to choose to not drink alcohol. Yes, but if I if 446 00:31:33.119 --> 00:31:37.599 I drink alcohol, I'm powerless over alcohol and it will take over all bets 447 00:31:37.599 --> 00:31:44.079 are off. There's no controlling it. I'll just contro But but you know 448 00:31:44.119 --> 00:31:45.880 how a A and like I said, and he probably says the drugs, 449 00:31:45.920 --> 00:31:55.039 but they say, you know, I am powerless over alcohol. I guess 450 00:31:55.119 --> 00:31:56.720 you know, Like sure, But I feel today like I'm powerful, like 451 00:31:56.720 --> 00:31:59.960 if we went in there and we should do this and film it and record 452 00:32:00.119 --> 00:32:02.079 it. If we're in there in black high im Corey, I'm personal recovery 453 00:32:02.119 --> 00:32:07.559 and I'm powerful over alcohol. That doesn't make any sense. Why I'm powerful 454 00:32:07.559 --> 00:32:13.640 over alcohol. Yeah, that doesn't make any sense. I'm powerful over alcohol 455 00:32:13.720 --> 00:32:16.079 doesn't make any sense. I don't know. Maybe it's just how you're saying 456 00:32:16.119 --> 00:32:22.400 it. Oh of Grace School, we should do that at it well, 457 00:32:22.440 --> 00:32:25.839 I think, I think, because the thing is is that those groups are 458 00:32:27.119 --> 00:32:32.279 so old, I mean the foundation of it. They started with this idea 459 00:32:32.359 --> 00:32:37.400 and these were the steps, and this is what they are and this is 460 00:32:37.440 --> 00:32:40.279 the reality of it all, and this is what we need to remind ourselves 461 00:32:40.319 --> 00:32:45.200 of for the people to move through these steps and stay sober. And so 462 00:32:45.839 --> 00:32:50.559 it is what it is. Let's not change it. It's just a kind 463 00:32:50.599 --> 00:32:55.640 of a truth. It's a truth that I'm powerless over alcohol my life when 464 00:32:55.799 --> 00:33:00.000 in my life, what is it powerless overallcolm lives have become manageable. So 465 00:33:00.119 --> 00:33:05.279 when I drink alcohol, I'm powerless over alcohol. That's all saying. When 466 00:33:05.319 --> 00:33:08.200 I'm under the in when I'm drinking alcohol, I'm powerless over alcohol, and 467 00:33:08.240 --> 00:33:14.720 our lives would become unmanageable. That's where we were before anything. Maybe that's 468 00:33:14.720 --> 00:33:17.400 where we are now. But for the people that are still, you know, 469 00:33:19.039 --> 00:33:22.279 in their addiction, you have to realize that, yeah you are not. 470 00:33:22.640 --> 00:33:24.960 So that's step one is you have to admit your powerless over alcohol and 471 00:33:24.960 --> 00:33:30.039 your lives should become unmanageable. Everybody needs to do that step one. But 472 00:33:30.200 --> 00:33:36.200 you are powerful over alcohol if you don't drink it, Like I don't know, 473 00:33:36.240 --> 00:33:37.359 I have, I have a power to choose, I guess. And 474 00:33:37.400 --> 00:33:42.160 that's what I'm talking about. Yeah, what are you talking about. I'm 475 00:33:42.200 --> 00:33:47.359 just saying that it's just something that's so it's just so old, that's just 476 00:33:47.720 --> 00:33:52.279 I know, so established. Yeah, don't. I'm not trying to I'm 477 00:33:52.279 --> 00:33:57.960 not trying to dispute the AA steps at all. I'm not either. I'm 478 00:33:58.000 --> 00:34:02.559 just saying that at a point you do have to realize that you do have 479 00:34:02.680 --> 00:34:09.599 power over alcohol because you have the power to choose not to partake. That's 480 00:34:09.639 --> 00:34:15.800 all I'm saying. Man, does that make sense? Yeah, that's what's 481 00:34:15.880 --> 00:34:20.239 up. You know what I'm saying. It doesn't make sense. Well, 482 00:34:20.519 --> 00:34:24.960 be powerful today because you do have the choice. You do have the choice, 483 00:34:25.119 --> 00:34:28.920 make make a good decision, do then X right thing. If some 484 00:34:29.000 --> 00:34:31.880 bad happens, if some slips, okay, you know, try to you 485 00:34:31.920 --> 00:34:37.719 can try to ride it out and fool everybody again, but it's probably gonna 486 00:34:37.760 --> 00:34:45.559 work out the same way it did before, but worse. Just saying just 487 00:34:45.679 --> 00:34:50.599 saying there's nothing wrong with being sober. There's actually millions of things that are 488 00:34:50.800 --> 00:34:54.079 great about being sober. You just have to figure those things out for yourself. 489 00:34:54.559 --> 00:34:58.159 And trust me, they are out there. Just because they're not out 490 00:34:58.159 --> 00:35:00.280 there today doesn't mean that they're not going to be out there in the future 491 00:35:00.360 --> 00:35:04.000 for you. But you have to keep keep going to put one foot in 492 00:35:04.000 --> 00:35:07.880 front of the other. Rome wasn't building the day. So I'm told, 493 00:35:07.679 --> 00:35:12.280 I just keep getting more and more amazed by what happens in my life. 494 00:35:12.280 --> 00:35:15.679 And I say it over and over, like, man, six months ago, 495 00:35:15.719 --> 00:35:17.079 if you just said I'd be doing this here, doing this, doing 496 00:35:17.079 --> 00:35:21.480 this, dude, I'd say you're a liar. And we were just talking 497 00:35:21.519 --> 00:35:23.960 about it last night. I think in better midnightight before, I was like, 498 00:35:24.079 --> 00:35:29.880 man, I would have just said your nuts. Four years ago, 499 00:35:29.920 --> 00:35:30.760 he just said this is what's gonna be. This is where you're going to 500 00:35:30.840 --> 00:35:35.960 be in four years out of a said you got to be crazy. How's 501 00:35:36.000 --> 00:35:39.039 all that going to happen? That's the power and the beauty of being in 502 00:35:39.119 --> 00:35:43.599 recovery is these things that just keep coming and keep coming, and you just 503 00:35:43.679 --> 00:35:45.159 keep, like you said earlier, doing the next right thing. And I'd 504 00:35:45.159 --> 00:35:51.639 like to do the next thing right as well. Sometimes yeah, most of 505 00:35:51.639 --> 00:35:55.280 the time, try at least tow Yes, yes, so ball tomorrow, 506 00:35:55.280 --> 00:36:00.719 Fantasy football. Justin's beating my ass. I started the running back from the 507 00:36:00.760 --> 00:36:04.679 Lions. He's all right, and Mary Mark Andrews isn't gonna play. Mark 508 00:36:04.719 --> 00:36:07.840 Andrews might not play. I know. It's what's my worry? Should I 509 00:36:07.880 --> 00:36:09.239 be worried about that? Or should I worried if they do have him play 510 00:36:09.280 --> 00:36:15.840 and then I don't try to football show tomorrow? Maybe we'll see to an 511 00:36:15.880 --> 00:36:23.639 early morning fantasy football show live from the new studio. Anyway, Thanks for 512 00:36:23.679 --> 00:36:27.679 listening, though a little bit of rambling, but hopefully there was some good 513 00:36:27.719 --> 00:36:32.119 stuff in there that someone could take away from about the recovery side of things 514 00:36:32.159 --> 00:36:37.639 and the addiction side of things. So thanks everybody, have a good night. 515 00:36:37.480 --> 00:36:42.719 Through seventeen recovery dot com for more info and get the app the app 516 00:36:42.760 --> 00:36:49.159 stores. It's free. Thanks for listening to the two seventeen Recovery podcasts. 517 00:36:49.480 --> 00:36:53.760 When a bunch of free from two seventeen Recovery, go to the app on 518 00:36:53.800 --> 00:36:58.760 the website two seventeen recovery dot Com